#i thought i'll never fall into this but fuck

[shuenkio]

Secret Secret — ࣪𖤐 승민 .ᐟ

۫ ꣑ৎ Synopsis: They say, as a gay, never fall for the straight guy who’s affectionate and kind. But what happens when the straight guy finds himself falling for you instead?

۫ ꣑ৎ Paring: Seungmin x m!reader

۫ ꣑ৎ Genre: Fluff. ۫ ꣑ৎ Cw: none.

۫ ꣑ৎ non proof read ۫ ꣑ৎ Eng is not my 1st

۫ ꣑ৎ This is a work of fanfiction, do not throw unnecessary tantrums on this nsfw/sfw blog. ©Shuenkio

"Here!" He grabs your palm, place a chocolate bar all of the sudden. Causing you to furrow your brows, bewildered the scene.

"But what for?" You asked, still not recognizing his intentions yet. Today was Valentine's day, where everyone gave gifts or received them, and also the day of confessing their feelings to their loved ones you get it. But one thing that was odd was, Seungmin, the excellent and attractive employee in the company was the one who gave you, out all of the other girls, who had a big fat crush on him yet he chose you instead? Should you be happy or sad?

"idiot, it's Valentine day aigoo" the taller scoffed a heavy sigh before walk off, shove his hands back into his pocket act as if this never happened. You scratch the back of your head, unable to react to such a situation since never in your life receive gifts on Valentine's day.

"....what?" Once Seungmin is gone, all your co-workers beside you suddenly circling around like flies, some scream while some are even more excited than you. Who wouldn't when is THE Kim Seungmin, the nonchalantly blunted guy, out of the blue giving you a gift out of everyone, this should be displayed in the museum for real.

"Yaaaa M/N aren't you so lucky to get such gift??" Once say.

"UGH what did you do last live to live in my dream right now!!" Twice say.

"Gosh I better not hear you reject him, or Imma drowning you in this can" thrice say.

"reject? What reject, this is just a small gift right?" Keeping it low, there's no way he was y'know... Into guy? How is it possible if that was such an outright way to ask you out. Groaning was heard once you responded. Ever since you've been working here for god knows how long together with Seungmin, the latter will always find his way to take care of m/n secretly, giving rides home, act of service, helping m/n when he's struggling and gosh, there's so many. However, you don't think that kind of way, as a hopeless romantic guy from all the way childhood to this age now, you realized that you'll never find love since you're a homosexual. Never experience the high school love nor any kind of relationship ever. So when somebody is acting this way, you thought it was normal, isn't it?

"how dumb are you, Don't you notice how he acts when it comes to you ? You're the favoritesm" once say.

"true true, we get nothing during the new years eve but you got a fucking Rolex watch from him" twice say.

"m/n listen to us alright? If you're not certain about him, go ask him if it was worth the try, that man is not the straight forward one— we know how you feel when this happened but think Abt it, it has been a year now— but if you don't do anything, don't say we don't spare mercy, anything is possible just to make you say one word" thrice say.

Their advice lingers on your head. Face resting on your palm, pouting. Tskk it's actually a pretty serious thing for them and you tho, looking back to all the memories it sounds like you are his favorite indeed, as the time goes on it's far more than his favorite person.

"fine okay... I'll ask him this evening, I have dinner with him though" you stated, and focus on finishing your work. While your co-workers went back to their place with a happy grin spread across their face.

"kiss me~ don't say no—"

A sleek, jet-black luxury car rolled to a stop right outside the building, its polished body reflecting the dim lights in a way that made it look almost too perfect to be real. The engine gave a soft hum, like a low purr, almost too smooth to be true.

Then, the door opened—wide, welcoming. Like it was waiting for you.

For a second, you stood there, blinking. Was this really happening? This was getting a little too real, like something straight out of a movie.

You snapped out of it, stepping into the car with a mix of hesitation and something else—you weren’t entirely sure. The leather seat felt too soft, the smell of clean luxury wrapping around you. It was like you were in a different world, one where all of this was normal, and you weren’t still trying to figure out what the hell was going on.

You reached for the seatbelt, your fingers a little more unsteady than they should’ve been. As you finally settled in, you glanced at Seungmin.

His face was relaxed, eyes forward, fingers steady on the steering wheel—but there was that smirk at the corner of his mouth. That little smirk that made everything too damn real.

"All set?" he asked, his voice smooth and casual, like this wasn’t completely out of place.

Before you could even answer, the engine roared to life beneath you. The car glided forward, the world outside blurring as you were pulled deeper into whatever this was—whatever he was.

You couldn’t stop yourself from glancing at Seungmin, his eyes just flicking toward you for a second, that smirk still there, as if he knew exactly what was running through your mind.Yeah. You were definitely in trouble now.

( in third pov )

The soft hum of conversation filled the air as M/N and Seungmin stepped into the restaurant. The warm glow of fairy lights draped across the ceiling cast a golden hue over the Valentine’s-themed decor—roses in crystal vases, flickering candles, and a breathtaking view of the ocean stretching beyond the glass windows. The faint scent of saltwater mixed with the aroma of fresh pasta and wine. It was undeniably romantic. Too romantic.

M/N swallowed, eyes darting around. It wasn’t that he minded being here with Seungmin, but something about the atmosphere made his chest feel a little tight, his heart just a little too aware. And maybe—just maybe—it had to do with the nagging feeling creeping up on him lately.

Seungmin strolled up to the reception desk, hands in pockets, his usual composed demeanor unreadable. The receptionist, a cheerful woman with a clipboard, greeted them with a bright smile.

"Ah, welcome! Table for two? Are you a couple?"

M/N immediately parted his lips to say No, but before the word could form, Seungmin, ever so casual, nodded and replied, "Yes."

The receptionist beamed.

"Oh, wonderful! Happy Valentine’s Day! You’ll be getting our couple’s discount!"

M/N blinked, a sharp inhale catching in his throat. Excuse me?

Seungmin, on the other hand, remained perfectly unbothered, only lifting a brow at M/N as if to say, What? It’s a discount.

M/N’s mind spiraled in a dozen different directions. Was it just for the sake of the discount? Or was this something else? Something that confirmed that inkling feeling he’d been trying to ignore for weeks?

Still slightly dazed, he followed Seungmin to their table near the floor-to-ceiling window. The restaurant was nestled on a cliffside, giving them an uninterrupted view of the sea. The waves shimmered under the soft glow of the moon, the distant city lights twinkling against the horizon. It was the kind of place lovers would dine at, whispering sweet nothings over candlelit dinners.

And here M/N was, sitting across from Seungmin—Seungmin, who was all nonchalance, leaning back against the seat, sipping water like he hadn’t just thrown M/N’s entire world off its axis.

The meal went by in a blur, M/N hyper-aware of every brush of movement, every fleeting glance. Seungmin, of course, was the same as always, his aloof expression unreadable, his voice carrying that low, effortless ease. And M/N? M/N felt like he was malfunctioning internally.

Then, just as M/N thought he was in the clear, Seungmin casually slid something across the table.

A box. Wrapped neatly with a ribbon.

M/N stared at it. Then at Seungmin. Then back at the box.

"...What’s this?" His voice came out quieter than intended.

Seungmin tilted his head slightly. "A gift."

M/N hesitated. He could already feel the heat creeping up his neck, fingers trembling slightly as he tugged at the ribbon. The box opened with a soft click—inside, nestled in velvet, was a delicate silver bracelet. The charm attached to it was subtle, but M/N recognized the design instantly. It was something he had offhandedly admired months ago while window shopping—something he hadn’t even realized Seungmin had noticed.

M/N’s breath hitched.

His chest felt tight again, but for an entirely different reason.

"...Do you like it?" Seungmin asked, tone as indifferent as ever, but his eyes—those deep, steady eyes—held something softer. Something patient.

M/N swallowed hard, nodding, his voice refusing to work.

Silence stretched between them, thick with unspoken words. And maybe it was the dim lighting, maybe it was the leftover adrenaline from earlier, or maybe—just maybe—it was the fact that everything was finally making sense.

M/N clenched his fists under the table, gathering every ounce of courage he had.

"...Do you," he exhaled slowly, pulse hammering, "like me?"

Seungmin didn’t blink. Didn’t even hesitate.

He leaned back, exuding that same effortless calm, and said, "I thought that was obvious."

M/N’s heart stopped.

And just like that, everything he had been trying to ignore crashed over him like a tidal wave.

Seungmin watched as M/N sat there, frozen, his fingers twitching slightly against the table. His lips parted like he wanted to say something—anything—but nothing came out. His wide eyes, the way his breath hitched, the sheer disaster of emotions playing out on his face—Seungmin almost felt bad for him.

Almost.

With a sigh, Seungmin leaned back, arms crossing over his chest. "You know," he started, voice even, "I figured you’d be like this."

M/N finally blinked, snapping out of whatever internal meltdown he was going through. "...Like what?"

Seungmin tilted his head slightly, his expression unreadable. "Hopeless," he said bluntly. "A hopeless romantic who’s spent his whole life thinking love was something out of reach just because you’ve never had it before." He exhaled through his nose, tapping his fingers against the table. "And yeah, I knew you’d overthink this. But honestly? I don’t care."

M/N stiffened, his breath caught in his throat. "You—"

"I don’t care," Seungmin repeated, this time with a slow, deliberate shrug. "Because I already like you." His gaze was steady, unwavering. "And there’s nothing you can do about that."

M/N’s chest tightened.

Seungmin watched him, as if waiting, as if knowing exactly what was running through his mind. Then, with that same lazy, deadpan tone, he added, "So? What now? You gonna run away? Or are you finally gonna admit you like me back?"

M/N felt his heart lurch. He swallowed thickly, mind racing.

And then, finally, finally, he let out a breath and muttered, "...Fine." His voice was quiet, but firm. "Yes."

Seungmin smirked, like he had just won some long-awaited game. He lifted his glass, taking a sip of water, before setting it down with a soft clink.

"Yeah," he said, exhaling like this was nothing new. "Thought so."

M/N groaned, slumping against the table. He was so done for.

A/n: Guy guess what? I'm doing this experiment with Seungmin y'all!! I'm kicking my feet, giggling, & ate some wall while writing this 😋 my favorite so far— I'd love some comments, like really!!! Should I continue or whatever.

Funtalk: I can't help but to post this in advance, because valentines are 4 more days and I can't wait to see y'all reaction, so yeah...

[holocene-sims]

next // previous

june 3, 2022 2:00 p.m. newcrest counseling

"i'm really happy to hear you think you worried too much, but what makes you say that? did you feel differently than you expected?"

"i did, actually. as i've figured out over the last week, doing the work to become a healthier person means i know how to better manage negative emotions. i often still default to seeing myself as the person who just falls apart as soon as i feel any emotion less pleasant than neutral. at first, when i was on the plane and then in my hotel room alone, i was battling negative thoughts, but i turned it around pretty quickly. to be honest, that was weird. i'm so used to having to completely lose it before i can recover. recovering at the first very tiny peak in severity is almost a miracle.

finding the good things, however small, to focus on last weekend was what helped me revert my mood and stop feeling icky before icky became horrendous. the negative thoughts on my mind, i redirected to the best of my ability. like, for example, okay, if i never fly an airplane again before i die, i'll just be thrilled i could do it for a few years. a few wonderful years is better than zero years. little kid grant never thought he'd survive past 18, let alone follow his dreams. if time travel were possible and i could go back and tell grant kid he flew an airplane one day, he'd never fucking believe it. so, i already won. nothing can take that away.

on that note, i'm historically not the best at being open to good things or experiences. i'm at least prone closing myself off to relishing them once they're over. i spent so long being lashed by the world with no end in sight that i don't trust goodness, you know? i expect people to get fed up with me or to hurt me. i expect the universe to screw me over. i also believe i don't deserve goodness, and i've thrown away good things myself for that reason alone. i think i'll struggle with those specific thoughts for a very long time, but i do know that i am learning move past them. i'm learning to believe i deserve better and to appreciate things more and to extract what i can from my experiences.

i realized i was moving past those thoughts for the first time after dealing with my ex and then cutting off my dad for the second time, but especially after my dad, and now i'm confirming the changes. i felt like hot garbage for weeks after that final conversation with him because i just did. reminding myself of how truly horrible he was as a father hurt, but after a while, i was glad i told him the truth, and suddenly, i had much more appreciation for the male figures in my life who were or are kind to me. a burden was legitimately lifted off my shoulders, and old me would have never managed to find anything positive in that situation, so the fact that current me did says a lot. if i can find something positive there, i can find something positive anywhere.

but hey, i'm not even getting to the most fulfilling part of why i felt differently than i expected. the wedding was genuinely great, and i ended up wasting no substantial amount of time absorbed in my own feelings, so i got to be present with my friends. even when i was pretending my trauma didn't exist years ago, i spent so much time stuck in my own head or my own body, always filtering every personal conversation through that lens, and you don't get how much energy and attention that soaks up until you can be fully present with people. of course, it helps that i knew all these people and knew i could relax and trust them, but still. it felt good to be able to devote my entire attention to celebrating them and their lives and not have split it between them and my own exhausting thoughts."

[kakusu-shipping]

All the stupid little things Doctor Harley Sawyer does that endears me to him

-Giggles like a school girl when he closes a door on the player. He thinks it's so funny to mildly inconvenience you. Suffer, germ, go the long way around. He does this multiple times and it never fails to get a laugh out of him.

-Has some kind of soft spot to music; Piansaurus and Yarnaby are near identical in intellect and physical ability, the only advantage Yarnaby had to gain the Doctor's favor was he could play music, and did so when near the Doctor. Also Harley personally requested Yarnaby be able to play music because he thought it'd be funny??? And I just think that's cute.

-Makes old man noises like he's stretching when awoken as a computer and it just feels so Extra. He is not physically capable of stretching but he will stretch and hum and haa like he was just risen from slumber anyway.

-"Innocence is bliss, and she is OH so innocent". The emphasis and mic crackling volume on "OH" in this line delivery does so much to my brain. He hates her cutesy little act so much.

-That fruity ass little wave he does when he yeets you down the trap door

-Bonus also the "not even the ground beneath your feet is yours" at the start of the chapter really didn't fit with what he was saying and I have chosen to interpret it as him setting himself up to do this later. He already knew he was gonna chuck the player down the trap door and he wanted a very cool one-liner call back to go with it.

-Has a habit of picking "Problem Children" specifically for projects, both in Quinn for Yarnaby and Kevin in Doey, even against other scientists judgment. Maybe a remnant of how he was a "problem child" that was removed from a special project because of his difficulty? I love a grown ass man who is projecting his traumas onto Children. Always fun in media.

-Picky eater. That's all. I think it's cute. Fuck sweet pickles you're so right bby those things are nasty <3

-In his logs and tapes he always refers to subjects by their test number and with It/Its pronouns, but for some reason in this chapter he calls them all by their character names and correct pronouns, even the Prototype gets it's name and Pronouns correct. I' just curious about this change in demeanor because it was such a staple of how he interacted with the toys before.

-"Come on in, the Doctor will see you now" The verbal eye roll. The distant annoyance. The boredom when the player escapes his little morality trap. I also really like the light up in his tone when the player DOES kill the Critter to escape.

-Brags that his mind isn't easy to break like the other toys, then gets this real far away tone when in his voice on the elevator ride to his boss fight talking about the bell tolling,. Death is coming. His life's work was to prevent it's approach and yet here it comes, up an elevator shaft, for him.

-"I'll bury myself so far down that no one will ever find me! Not you, Not the Prototype, Not Anyone!" The desperate delivery of this line feeds into the previous point. He is falling apart and he's scared and a lot like Doey he doesn't trust anyone anymore and just wants to be left alone.

-Crying in his death scream

[hazbinsponsoredbyvee]

What's the matter Vox? I thought you sexually fantasized Alastor killing you?

"I sexually fantasize about him trying to kill me, not him actually killing me! Or him killing me back when we were both human and didn't know each other. What you sent is entirely different! Even back before we made up, we never would have actually killed each other, so if he's willing to kill me, something has gone very wrong. And the whole 'you were a wonderful experience' bullshit sounds way too close to some of the shit he said when we had our falling out, and that fucking stings! I... fuck, it's like it was showing how bad things could have gone, and I... dammit, there's not much worse than that!"

"Breath, darling. As you already said, I would never have actually killed you. I've always valued your existence in my life far too much for that. And at least half the things I said during our falling out were... not true to how I actually felt. I promise, I'll never again hurt you in any way that sticks. Modern technology is so temperamental, after all, and I can't risk damaging the only picture box that is actually worth something!"

*reluctantly laughs and snuggles up to Alastor*

[dtilmnh]

My headcanons on Sirius's abuse and him leaving Grimmauld Place :

I've seen the discourse on whether Sirius was physically abused or not, and I fall somewhere in the middle. I don't think he was Cruciated everyday and beaten black and blue like in some fics, but I definitely think there was some physical abuse as well, although I think that it was mostly symbolic (I'll write more about this in a different post).

He was put under the Cruciatus curse a few times though, once during a fucked up Black tradition and a few times when Orion got drunk. He always made sure that when Orion got too drunk it was him around and not Regulus, so naturally when he lashed out the blows fell upon Sirius.

Walburga tried to use it once when he was 12. They were yelling at each other as usual, and she just snapped and it was the first curse on her lips.

It didn't work. Sirius felt a jolt of pain and nothing else. He held onto that for years, the reminder that his mother still loved him no matter how much they fought. That even though she was wrong about so many things, everything she did was for him, she just didn't know any better.

Walburga never tried to use it again. She couldn't face the humiliation of a failing a spell because her feelings got in the way. She was raised to believe that emotions were a weakness, and failing to cast a curse, even if it was on her own son, was the height of embarrassment.

She did end up using it once more, the night Sirius left. They were fighting as usual, screaming at each other with spells flying out of their wands and shattered glass on the floor, and the curse slipped out of her mouth before she even thought about it.

Sirius didn't even bother to dodge. The curse struck him square in the middle of his chest, and this time it 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘬𝘦𝘥.

Maybe it was because Orion was always inebriated when he used it, maybe it was because Walburga was far more vicious than Orion ever was, or maybe it was his own emotions hightening the curse, he didn't know, but it was the worst pain he had ever felt in his life.

When she finally wrenched away her wand and cut off the curse they both stared at each other in shock for a few moments before Sirius recovered and managed to stun her before she could react. And he 𝘳𝘢𝘯.

His father had never cared about him a day in his life, his brother was more likely to hex him than talk to him these days, and now he had final, irrevocable proof that his own mother didn't love him anymore. So he left. He finally left when he knew that there was no one who cared enough to make him stay.

[fragilelovelythings]

Let it Happen (Billy Butcher x Fem!Reader)

Billy Butcher x Fem!Reader 18+

Summary: You go clubbing and you see him, lost in his dancing.

---

There he was, no dramatic coat, no psychotic vibes, no crazy eyes glaring at any supe. The man stood proudly, swaying as naturally as he pulled any trigger against danger. 

The way his hips moved to bear witness, to a chaotic swing and sexual drive pulling his body forward and backwards. Looking at Butcher this loose seemed a sin, one you know you were truly into whenever he looked at you behind his wayfarers. 

Feeling the thrill you kept glancing at him, desire conveyed in your stare. 

Butcher didn’t acknowledge you or anybody: he just moved his head side to side gone to the beat of the tech music he embraced. You bit your upper lip, without knowing how to catch his attention. You held a breath and closed your eyes, playing the game and feeling your body boiling through tight lips. And then, when you opened your brown eyes he was right before you, his tall frame making you tremble. The dark glasses remained put and the smirk in his masculine face made you curl your lips, abashed.

The second you felt him lean and the smell of something raw and manly drove you insane, he whispered against your left ear, mouth brushing your dark brown curls. 

“Good shit innit?” The raspy voice provoked an unnamed trail of need, wanton moans still trapped against your awkward giggle. 

Wishful thinking. 

“Yeah, good shit” you reply, hoping he meant the music and he barked a laugh, something barely audible above the loud, trance magic now enveloping you both.

“Ain’t you a sweetheart” You can’t contain the surprise and point at yourself, your sweaty hand mix of the hot atmosphere and the nervousness eating you up. He leaned again, this time intentionally brushing his thick lips against the lobe of your ear “Yeah, a wanton wee thing” 

You couldn’t help the way your body reacted, sweat mingling, ears burning by the sensual contact and you incline immediately against him, daring. 

Of course, he had noticed your stare, whatever you thought was something casual becoming the reality he dropped at your feet. He didn’t seem creeped about it but delighted. If anything, the doe eyes you pulled worked marvels and when the weight of his broad right hand rested in your waist you felt him inhale deeply “A tight small lil’ waist you got here” You nod timidly, the thrill nesting quickly under your stomach “Wonder if it’s the only tight thing you got here for me” 

Taken aback you search his eyes, promising, and brave as never before, and you shake your head willingly. 

The way he lifted the glasses and you finally got a full view of his black pits of desire you moan.

[ame-to-ame]

.

[forcebookish]

and can i just say that i hate her character development lol

[silverselfshippingchaos]

ugghhh wintertime sucks!! I'm sad and tired and sad all the time.. I need a nap.. and f/o cuddles.. and another nap..

[decaf-mother]

I wanna join in on the Rudy writing fun but my brain will not do romance right now. I've become so burnt out and my personal hatred is too strong. I look at people and think "Yeah. You'd just screw me over. Love isn't real. Nobody could care about me like that. Don't even try." And I hate it I wanna believe again and it's effecting my writing at this point. Why must people screw me over so much to the point I'm just totally broken mentally. Fuck humans honestly especially men.

[nonokoko13]

KNY ANIME NEWS IN MY TL BROUGHT THE PAIN I HAD YEARS AGO AFTER ENDING THE MANGA IF ONLY I COULD ENTER THE SERIES AND SAVE THEM OOH MEMORIES GET OUT LEAVE ME ALONE

[skrunksthatwunk]

wait why is dmc1 good

[too-tired-omg]

I just realised why I like the "impossible love" trope so much.

You see, when an "impossible love" is portrayed in media, its about two people that love each other so deep, so much, so hard. The circumstances are what makes it impossible for them to be together, but if it was for them... if it was for them everything would be so perfect.

If it was for them, they would live the happily ever after they've always dreamt of, either together or each on their own. They would kiss and smile out in broad daylight, hold hands, and enjoy the other's smile, their laugh, the sparkle in their eyes. And they would be in love the way they want to be in love.

But they can't. Because of the end of the world, a war, a family feaud, a promise, their duty, pure hate towards them... and it can't be. But they want it to be. It's not that there's no love. It's not that there's no desire or willingness or lack of fear or doubt. Is that there is something bigger than themselves that prevents them from showing it out loud.

And maybe it's terrible and I shouldn't wish for this but, I can't help but want a love where the reason it isn't happening is not because they don't love me or I don't love them, I don't wanna have any more one-sided love, I'm tired of it. I just would like an impossible love that isn't impossible because of us, but because of them.

[iguessitsjustme]

I'm also so pissed because Phu came back, accepted the job with Nan's company that Nan literally fought to help him avoid, then up and abandoned him AND his fucking job. Like Phu fucks with Nan's personal life so much that now he needs to let that bleed into Nan's professional life? Nan was doing fine. He was literally letting go and moving on with his life when Phu returned and fucked everything up again. Phu has no sense of responsibility. Not even for his own damn coffee shop. I can forgive a lot, but I cannot forgive people fucking with jobs/careers. Nan deserves to feel secure in at least one aspect of his life damn it.

[malachitezmeyka]

It's that "spend hours sobbing my eyes out in bed for several reasons, including but not limited to the fact tomorrow is Monday, the fact my social battery has been completely drained and won't recover anytime soon, the fact my landlady is due to show up tomorrow evening and will likely piss me off again, the fact I've had the urge to write since Friday and ended up not writing even a single fucking word, the fact exam pressure keeps rising and I still don't know what to do with my life after I'm done with school, and the fact I'm both completely overwhelmed and so terribly lonely at the same time" kind of Sunday evenings

[viulus]

Finally tried out Ghost Trick tonight