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scoobydoodean · 10 months ago

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Hi! I just wanted to start off by saying that your analyses on the characters are awesome and they really helped further my understanding of the show, so keep up the good work! :D

I was wondering, if you don't mind answering, what did you think of about Dean giving permission for Gadreel/Ezekiel to possess Sam in season 9?

I'm still a bit on the fence about how to feel about it and I thought your particular brand of wisdom might be able to help me out.

Dean had just a few pieces of information at the hospital in 9.01.

Dean knew that Sam had every intention of surviving The Trials in 8.14 and in fact Sam promised he would survive them and show Dean to the light at the end of the tunnel, because Dean was suicidal: "I'm closing the gates. It's a suicide mission for you. [...] I want to slam hell shut, too, okay? But I want to survive it. I want to live, and so should you. You have friends up here, family. I mean, hell, you even got your own room now. You were right, okay? I see light at the end of this tunnel. And I'm sorry you don't – I am. But it's there. And if you come with me, I can take you to it."

Dean observed that Sam became suicidal over the course of The Trials and that this culminated in Sam forsaking his promise and his desire to live and falling into a tailspin where he wanted to die to make himself "pure". Disturbing dialogue from 8.21: "Knights of the Round Table. Had all of King Arthur's knights, and they were all on the quest for the Holy Grail. And I remember looking at this picture of Sir Galahad, and, and, and he was kneeling, and— and light streaming over his face, and— I remember... thinking, uh, I could never go on a quest like that. Because I'm not clean. I mean, I w— I was just a little kid. You think... maybe I knew? I mean, deep down, that— I had... demon blood in me, and about the evil of it, and that I'm— wasn't pure? [...] It doesn't matter anymore. Because these trials... they're purifying me."

Dean pleaded with Sam not to kill himself in 8.23, and Sam agreed, asking, "How do I stop?"

These are the details Dean has prior to Sam falling into a coma. He believes that his brother wanted to commit suicide, but that he did change his mind and decide he wants to live.

Two other notable details:

First, Gadreel earns Dean's trust quickly by risking his ass to help Dean, and then on the phone (after being given the fake name "Ezekiel") Cas, relieved and pleased, vouches for Ezekiel. So Dean has no reason to suspect anything nefarious (and in fact, at this point, Gadreel doesn't have particularly nefarious intentions besides staying in hiding away from other angels).

Second, Dean is not the one who pleads with Sam to live in the dream sequence, getting him to say "Yes". It can't be Dean, because 1) "Dean's" face morphs into Gadreels which is clearly intended to indicate to us that this wasn't Dean speaking 2) If Gadreel was somehow projecting the real Dean into the conversation to give that speech, then Gadreel wouldn't be the one receiving the consent. It would truly be Dean receiving it and not just Gadreel pretending. Those words HAVE to come from Gadreel's mouth for the possession to work—not Dean's. We've seen angels morph into loved ones and mimic their voices perfectly several times.

With all that in mind:

After Gadreel pitches his plan to possess Sam, Dean immediately says it isn't his call to make—it's Sam's. It's after Gadreel shows him Sam falling back into the same suicidality from 8.23—wanting to die so that "no one else can get hurt because of me"—that Dean wavers. Still—at the end of the day, whether Sam agrees to live or not was never Dean's choice, and this is something I often see people get mixed up about. Dean doesn't get to choose whether Sam dies or not. It is still Sam who chooses to live. Sam does this by saying "Yes" to Gadreel. This could not have happened if Sam hadn't changed his mind about living. He doesn't know he's going to be possessed, but he has once again beaten back his suicidality and chosen to live. Sam still had hope in a good future.

Sam chose to live. He did not know he was going to be possessed. That's the issue. However, Dean did not intend to keep Gadreel's possession from Sam after it happened. Dean and Gadreel have this conversation upon leaving the hospital:

DEAN So? How's it look in there? EZEKIEL IN SAM’S BODY Not good. There is much work to be done. DEAN Yeah, but he's gonna wake up, right? EZEKIEL IN SAM’S BODY He will. DEAN So, what he does – what, is he gonna feel you inside, triaging his spleen? EZEKIEL IN SAM’S BODY He will not feel me, no. There is no reason for Sam to know I'm in here at all. DEAN You're joking. No, this is – this is too big. EZEKIEL IN SAM’S BODY And what will he do if you do tell him he is possessed by an angel? DEAN Well, he'll have to understand.

This conversation suggests that Dean's initial thought process was "We perform supernatural life-saving surgery". He just wanted to get Sam to a point where he'd wake up and they could talk. Like any situation with a relative in a coma, that person in a coma can't consent to surgery. The next of kin is the one who gives consent, because their loved one can't. They can only consent to a procedure if awake to do so. So Dean doesn't stop Gadreel from performing life saving surgery, but his intial belief and intent is that they'll put all of this back in Sam's hands when he's awake.

Up to this point, I don't actually have a problem with what Dean's done based on his knowledge. It's here at the end of the episode, where Gadreel convinces Dean to depart from his intial intent and stall, that in my opinion, the "Dean doing something wrong" part starts:

EZEKIEL IN SAM’S BODY And if he does not? Without his acceptance, Sam can eject me at any time, especially with me so weak. And if Sam does eject me, he will die. DEAN Then we keep it a secret for now. Or until Sam's well enough that he doesn't need an angelic pacemaker or I find a way to tell him. I - I... As for him being in a hospital, I'll have to figure something out. EZEKIEL IN SAM’S BODY I can erase it all, if you like. He will not remember any of this.

Dean doesn't feel good about it, but he agrees to keep quiet, because he's scared Sam will yet again make a suicidal play. Dean is riddled with guilt in the following episodes over lying to Sam, and in 9.08, Dean tries to tell Sam he's possessed, but Gadreel takes over Sam's body and stops him. Dean comes clean again in 9.09, only for Gadreel to stop Sam from receiving the news again.

So. Dean's mistake is lying to Sam. He shouldn't have lied to him. Point blank. At the same time, had Dean pushed the issue, would Gadreel have been willing to be expelled? Would he ever have allowed Dean to tell Sam the truth, from the moment he was... installed? Or was Dean screwed from the beginning, and was the idea that he got to choose any of this—any bit of it—really just... an illusion to keep Dean compliant with the possession that was keeping Gadreel under the radar?

Think about it for a second. Why did Gadreel ask Dean's permission? He didn't ever need Dean's permission to do any of this. He didn't need Dean's permission to trick Sam. He didn't need Dean's permission to remove Sam's memory of the hospital. He didn't need Dean's permission to keep the fact that he was possessing Sam a secret. He could have done every bit of this without asking. The problem was, Dean probably would have caught onto the disappearing angel act, and Gadreel would have had to get violent, and for the first part of season 9, Gadreel doesn't want to get violent! He just wants a place to lay low, and sees an opportunity to prove he's a good angel who helps humans—not just the angel who let the serpent into the garden. Getting Dean's "consent" might ease his own conscience about nonconsensual possession or be a way to keep Dean compliant or both, but ultimately, these are more questions worth weighing imo, because Supernatural loves to toy with the illusion that Dean has power in situations where he doesn’t, and in this case, he doesn't... actually have any power at all... does he?

That said, when it comes right down to it, Dean still did something wrong by helping keep the secret—by not trying to tell Sam the truth immediately because he was scared. And well. Okay. So what?

This is a show with characters who have good intentions but still make mistakes. As Cas will say about this later, "You were stupid for the right reasons". We get some great insights into the pitfalls that lead Dean down this path, and it's interesting to watch that happen and then later, see a broken mirror as Sam endeavors to prove through season 10 what Dean is willing to do can't touch what Sam is ultimately willing to do to keep Dean around.

Here's the thing—I don't believe for a single second that Sam wouldn't do the exact same thing in 9.01 had their positions been reversed. Sam and Dean have a conversation along these lines at the end of 9.13 "The Purge":

DEAN All right, you want to be honest? If the situation were reversed and I was dying, you'd do the same thing. SAM No, Dean. I wouldn't. Same circumstances...I wouldn't.

This genuinely wounds Dean and gets brought up a few times, but then in 9.23 when it's brought up for the last time in another context:

DEAN What happened with you being okay with this? SAM I lied.

Sam never gets the chance to do the exact same thing to Dean, but he has already gone behind Dean's back to try and save his life before. He's used Dean's death to justify doing things Dean begged him not to do on his behalf. He kept the case they were actually on under wraps as he inched toward a plan to turn himself and Dean into Frankenstein's monsters in 3.15 (and really the only reason it didn't work is that Sam got captured by Doc Benton and Dean had to save his ass, and then Sam morosely helped dig the grave). Sam went behind Dean's back directly against his wishes to threaten a crossroad's demon in 3.05. In season 10, he violates Dean's consent by removing the Mark of Cain from Dean's arm using the Book of the Damned, which not only requires an overt human sacrifice of Oskar and gets a woman named Suzie killed in "The Werther Project" because Sam refuses to heed her warnings, but also results in the apocalypse... and all of this was something Dean asked Sam not to do, and Sam did every bit of it to get his brother back, and while standing in the wreckage in 11.01, echoed Dean's line from 9.13, saying, "I would do it again". Dean signed the supernatural possession next-of-kin consent form, and the fallout was Kevin and Sam. Sam violated Dean's consent and tens of thousands of people died and he said he'd do it again while they died around him.

#also i got excited but xoxo 😘#season 9 #9.01 #gadreel #the flannel business #3.15 #3.05 #11.01 #9.13 #8.14 #9.08 #9.09 #mail #deans moral compass

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ladyofthehightower · 9 days ago

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Leaving Driftmark discourse in 2024...

... but i still have two more days to speak my mind, so i will.

Long post, but do bare with me.

One of my biggest issues with HoTD discourse is how moments like everything that goes down at Driftmark are treated. The events—from Aemond claiming Vhagar to Alicent's knife attack—aren’t standalone; they’re deeply rooted in the show's prior dynamics. But people loooove to ignore that!

SO. For the last time, before we leave it behind in 2024, let's discuss Driftmark, and everything that led up to it.

Let's start with Aemond, as we only have one previous episode to go through for him.

We learn that Aemond is being bullied by Aegon and his nephews, mainly for not having a dragon. But we can assume that his bullying has been going on for a while, and goes beyond the dragon, judging on scenes/dialogue in the episode (we have Viserys and Alicent discussing it, Alicent confronting Aegon about it, and of course Alicent comforting Aemond. We also have the training scene in the courtyard).

We can easily assume that his lack of a dragon is a big source of insecurity, as he literally risks his life to remedy it. It must be especially difficult that Jace and Luke have dragons, as Aemond knows they aren't "true" Targaryens. It's unclear to what extent, but we can assume that Alicent and/or Aegon have been talking to Aemond about Jace and Luke being bastards. I mean, it is pretty clear to see, but the animosity comes from somewhere.

In s1e7, at the funeral, Aemond tries to approach Jace, but doesn't when Jace ultimately return Aemond's attempt to reconcile or comfort.

Now Alicent!

Let's think! Looking at episode 1-7, strictly from Alicent's perspective, completely ignoring "factual truth" and other character's views and opinions- Just kidding! We don't even have to think at all! Because Alicent tells us, with words, why she is upset with Rhaenyra!

What have I done but what was expected of me? Forever upholding the kingdom, the family, the law. While you flout all to do as you please. Where is duty? Where is sacrifice? It's trampled under your pretty foot again. And now you take my son's eye, and to even that, you feel entitled.

Essentially from s1e2 forward, Alicent watches as Rhaenyra get's away with anything and everything, while Alicent suffers at the hand of her father and her husband. It does not matter what it is, Viserys seems blind to Rhaenyra's faults. Alicent is jealous of the freedom she sees Rhaenyra enjoy, of the crimes she gets away with. It's clear that Visery's only priority is Rhaenyra, he cares little for his children with Alicent, which is of course very frustrating.

Alicent loses all her happiness because she does her duty. While Rhaenyra gains all of hers from ignoring it.

Let's then look at s1e7, Driftmark, THE moment.

Aemond claims Vhaegar, a huge feat for a child. He risks his life for it! Is it insensitive? Yes. Laena has just been buried, Baela and Rhaena are mourning. But what Aemond did was not a crime, it was a child being insensitive at most.

Luke, Jace, Baela and Rheana (with a knife) go to intercept whoever claimed Vhaegar, and they find Aemond: Luke and Jace's bully victim. It's a 4v1 where they're all on top of Aemond at one point, punching him. Aemond rises a stone to Luke, but lowers it. Jace pulls a knife, tries to attack Aemond. Aemond rises the rock to Jace, but does nothing, which is when Luke attacks with the knife.

After this, we watch as Alicent, heartbroken, demands justice for her son's lost eye. Is she wrong to demand an eye for an eye? Yes. They are all children, and demanding an eye from a child is crazy, but in that moment, Alicent is crazy. Because no one cares! Her son lost an eye, and somehow the discussion is about Rhaenyra and her children being insulted? Aemond lost an eye, and now Rhaenyra wants him sharply questioned? I think any mother who loves her children, who has never strayed from the path of duty while watching someone ignore it and get away with it for 20 years, would go crazy when her son is maimed and the conversation shifts to someone else, making her son's attackers out to be the victims.

I think it's also pretty clear that Alicent runs for Rhaenyra, not Luke. She has her knife raised high, she is looking at Rhaenyra who his in front of Luke. I don't genuinely think Alicent was trying to harm Luke, but more so Rhaenyra, who is the actual source of her pain in that moment.

ANYWAY.

That's what I had to say. To understand Driftmark, both how Alicent and Aemond act (and why I disagree when I see people blame the fight on Aemond), we have to look at the previous episodes, and we have to be able to see things from Alicent's and Aemond's perspectives too.

Like Viserys, the fandoms very easily sides with Rhaenyra and tends to overlook all other perspectives. Which is why I ignored her perspective in this post. But I will say, how she acts is incredibly smart. With her "thank you, father", she actively drives Alicent to lash out, to appear crazy, in order to discredit her. She knows which buttons to push.

#i want to say more but this is already so long #will anyone even read it lol #house of the dragon #alicent hightower #aemond targaryen #s1e7 #driftmark #rhaenyra targaryen #jacerys velaryon #lucerys velaryon #analysis

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magicrainbowkitties · 5 months ago

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Hyperfixations are insane bro.

Anyways here's my "MK1 Roster By How Good Of A Hugger They Are" tier list

Not Pictured:

Shang Tsung: A

Reiko: B

Explanations under the cut if you want them.

S tier:

Smoke/Tomas: Great arm strength, super sweet and cute in his intro dialogues, definitely goes for head pats. Also big ups for the smokey smell.

Scorpion/Kuai Liang: Arm strength, sensitive and protective in his dialogues, and very warmb. Perfection.

Johnny Cage: You cannot tell me this version of the guy is not absolutely INSANE at hugs. Arms, emotional sensitivity, words of affirmation if you need them, and LOVES giving them. CageCon attendees attest he hugs like a giant teddy bear.

Sindel: She doesn't give them often, but when she does it's the absolute Best. Mom hugs are best hugs, you can fight me on that. But her big up is the prehensile hair. Mom hug + more hug from hair? FUCK YES.

Reptile/Syzoth: I mean this for both reptilian and human form btw. Because in one case, gigantic croco-man being extra careful to not to nick you on claws and scales, and on the other, nuzzles and contact. BOTH have the ups of strength, dad hugs (his son may be dead but I will attest that no matter the status of the child, the ability to give dad hugs remains with the father in question) are also best hugs, and a tail. Also being cold-blooded he'll probably try to seek warmth from the person he's hugging. So more physical contact. Which is Amazing.

A Tier:

Raiden: Very sweet and kind, just BARELY didn't make S tier. Only because the lightning probably means he's got static everywhere and even if his amulet is turned off, he's still gonna accidentally shock you. Which for some people is negligible, but this is my list. Still great at hugs, but with a fatal flaw.

Liu Kang: Also a very near-miss for S tier. He's got a lot of the same ups as Kuai Liang, except he's a good deal less sensitive than the latter dialogue wise, and he strikes me as the kinda guy who feels a little awkward hugging people. Not bad in the slightest, but he prefers other methods of affection.

Kenshi: He's not a very physically affectionate person, before or after blindness, and probably has a few issues recognizing when it's necessary. However, when he does give hugs, (more likely that he's the one being given the hug), he's very sweet about it. Probably goes on for a while longer than originally intended, very good for touch starvation. Just don't expect it very often.

Kung Lao: Would be an S if he TOOK OFF THE FUCKING HAT. Look man, I'm tryna get physical affection, and you're real nice and sweet when you wanna be, but I am NOT tryna get decapitated by that fuckin table saw super-glued to your head! Good arms, tho.

Shao: Yeah this one surprised me too. But, big guy, leans down, and DEFINITELY a fan of head pats. But he's a near miss for B because of the fact that 1, definitely not a hugger, and 2, he's an asshole. He probably gives side hugs if absolutely necessary. Definitely hugged Reiko when he was a kid, tho.

Shang Tsung: OK HEAR ME OUT. Absolute BOTTOM of A tier, but DAMMIT that fucker is a convincing guy. He's spent years and years hawking fake cures and things, you think he doesn't know how to use physical means to make his sales pitch more convincing? He's actually very, very good at hugs and making people feel better about themselves, and that's part of what makes him so damn dangerous.

B Tier:

Kitana: People are gonna hate me for not putting her higher, huh? Well I speak naught but the truth. Bc my girl is NOT a hugger for anybody except her family. Just not really her thing. She prefers a handshake and good conversation from her friends and allies. She gives decent hugs when called for, and is a good person to hug in crisis, but she'd rather be there either in a group hug or on the side talking someone through it while one of the S or As handle the Actual Hugging Part.

Tanya: Same kinda deal as Kitana, but mostly for maintaining professionalism as an Umgadi. She's very sweet and understanding, but prefers to pat shoulders and give affection through presence unless you're very, VERY close to her (cough Mileena)

Ermac: Total wild card. Countless souls within the body mean countless possibilities for hug affinity or quality. So direct middle of B tier, just to be safe. Based on story mode, however, Jerrod is a solid S.

Ashrah: Again, not much of a hugger, but gives decent ones when necessary. Isn't used to physical affection in the slightest, but overtime may graduate to an A as she comes to understand touch as something that doesn't have to hurt.

Takeda: I... Really don't have an explanation for this one. I just. Very mid vibes.

Reiko: Affection is for weak losers, man up and get over it, why don't you? What do you mean touch doesn't have to be hostile, that's crazy talk, leave him alone. Nevermind the fact that he will probably break down sobbing if he gets a real hug he can't push away, and will probably come just this side of crushing the hugger's ribs in return, what? Didn't happen, if you speak of this, you lose your jaw. Why are you bringing the General into this?

C Tier:

Rain: Not a hugger, not good at it, doesn't want to be. Also VERY sweaty. Or maybe that's just his water magic. Either way not good. The only thing keeping him out of D tier is he's got a decent amount of strength to it.

Havik: Will absolutely detach his entire torso in the middle of a hug so the other person freaks the fuck out. He thinks this is funny. It's not.

Peacemaker: Cop mentality and insensitive. The ONLY reason he's not in D is because I am told John Cena is amazing at hugs, so he has some trickle-down skill from there.

Mileena: Was a solid A before getting Tarkat. Very sweet and physically affectionate, and one of the things she mourns the most from before the infection. She especially wishes she could hug Tanya and Kitana more often, but they're also the last people in the world she wants to get sick.

D Tier:

Sub-Zero/Bi-Han: Ew cold hands. Also believes that physical affection is a weakness and refuses to do it. How in the hell is he related to Kuai Liang???

Li Mei: Is a fucking cop. As a rule, cops are bad at hugs.

Quan Chi: Why would you ever want a hug from this fucker? Unless you're Shang Tsung. And even then it's probably not great just because he doesn't get the point.

Baraka: NOPE. Even if you don't care about Tarkat, he does, and will refuse hugs of any kind ever. Even if it wasn't contagious, he's very spiky and awkward with it. Ask Syzoth.

Omni-Man: Just as likely to crush your ribcage as to awkwardly pat the back, more either way depending. Best avoid this fashy fuck all together.

Geras: He is very sweet and a good emotional rock. But a hugger he is not. He refuses hugs with a similar fervency to Baraka, but without the urgency ofc. He hates hugs, and asks that you please respect his boundaries. Also he'd get sand all over your clothes.

Homelander: Do I even need to explain.

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whump-mania · 9 months ago

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Dialogue Lines: Whumpee/Whumper/Caretaker Variations

(TWs: torture, cursing, collars, implied murder, drugging, nightmares)

~~~

Whumpee

Classic Whumpee Lines

1. “Touch me and it’s fucking over for you.”

2. “Please, please, I-I didn’t mean to—I didn’t mean to mess up, please don’t hurt me!”

3. “What’s the point of trying? I’m never getting out of here.”

4. “I-It hurts…it h-hurts so bad…why won’t it g-go away…?”

5. “Keep me chained up here all you want. You’re never gonna hear shit from me, buddy.”

Whumpee turned Caretaker

1. “Hey, I know, I know how much it hurts. Just breathe. Think of something else. That’s what helped me.”

2. “They got you too? That bastard. I’m so sorry.”

3. “Yes, I do! I do fucking understand, because I lived it! Now let me help you!”

4. “I didn’t get someone to help me through this when I was there. I want to be that person for you.”

5. “You remind me of myself…back then. Before they broke me.”

Whumpee turned Whumper

1. “Payback, bitch.”

2. “No. You don’t get to complain. Don’t you remember the rules against speaking out?”

3. “This collar…oh yeah, you remember it, huh? You always liked it on the tightest setting, didn’t you? Let’s start with that.”

4. “Back then, before you, I always thought every person deserved mercy. But no. You’re not even a person.”

5. “Wait, you’re crying? Come on, Whumper, are you kidding?! It took you weeks to make me cry for the first time, and you’re giving up on the first day?”

~~~

Caretaker

Classic Caretaker Lines

1. “This is gonna hurt. It’ll be over soon.”

2. “You think a little nightmare’s gonna hurt you? Nah. I’m here now. I’ll fight it off.”

3. “Just let them down for a second—Let me at least give them some water, it’s been almost two days!”

4. “I don’t know how you were even able to go through something like that…you’re stronger than I’ll ever be.”

5. “Come on, get up. Fresh bandage time—no, I don’t have to clean them today. That’s tomorrow.”

Caretaker turned Whumpee

1. “How…h-how did Whumpee do this?”

2. “Anything. I’ll be anything you fucking want me to be—just let them go.”

3. “Sorry, friend, I’m not gonna break as easily as they did. Bummer.”

4. “Wait, y-you didn’t…you didn’t tell me you did this to them…no, k-keep that away from me!”

5. “Whumpee, when they hurt me, just look away. Please.”

Caretaker turned Whumper

1. “Who else could have slipped those drugs into your food? Come on now, think a little quicker than that, Whumpee.”

2. “It feels kinda wrong, but…when you’d have nightmares, I…I kinda liked to listen.”

3. “I’m sick of taking care of everyone all the damn time. Well, guess what? Now you have no one.”

4. “Yeah, I’ve got them where you want them. They think they’re safe, but they won’t know what hit them.”

5. “Crazy how I used to patch these scars up…now, I get to make more.”

~~~

Whumper

Classic Whumper Lines

1. “Good morning. Come on, get up. I have so much planned for you today.”

2. “You’re so cute when you try to fight back. It’s like you’re not even trying.”

3. “Aw, you had a nightmare? Was it about me? I hope it was about me.”

4. “Don’t try and be a fucking actor. You and I both know you’re terrified.”

5. “Found you.”

Whumper turned Whumpee

1. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry for what I did, just…p-please, have mercy…”

2. “That all you’ve got? I used to hit you three times as hard.”

3. “No. I’m not apologizing. No matter how much you torture me. I regret nothing.”

4. “H-Hey, come on, we can be friends, right? You know I didn’t really mean all those things…h-hey, wait, get away from me!”

5. “No…maybe I deserve this. Maybe this is what I’m getting in return for all the things I did to you.”

Whumper turned Caretaker

1. “Hey, it’s okay, it’s just me! …Oh.”

2. “The nightmare…it was about me, wasn’t it?”

3. “I know you can’t ever forgive me…but let me at least do this one thing for you.”

4. “Okay, okay, yes, I did make that scar, but I’m the only one who knows how to make it better, so would you stop moving?!”

5. “Fuck, I’m sorry…I’m so sorry…”

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bookshelf-dust · 2 years ago

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the hurt is good

part i part ii part iii part iv part v part vi

billy hargrove x fem!reader

word count: 5,163

warnings: swearing, cops, talk of jail/billy's abuse, neil, fluff and love

a/n: well, here it is. this is the very last part of my very first series. i am very proud of the ending i've created for these two. i like to think i've given billy what he deserved. i'm so grateful for all of the feedback and support you've given me on the previous parts. also, a part of this relies heavily on hopper’s letter from season 3, so that’s that, and then some of his other dialogue. i’ve found that it fit billy effortlessly. i really hope you enjoy this and maybe find some solace in it. i love you all <333

before you read, listen to: time after time by cyndi lauper and/or the promise by when in rome

————

The first night without Neil, Hopper sits in his car outside the house. He promised no one would hurt them. He means it.

Nicky went to high school with both Hopper and Joyce. In fact, she was suspended for dealing them weed under the bleachers at one point. She regrets nothing to this day.

Because of that, it really wasn’t too difficult to have a heart-to-heart with the man, to get him to sit down with Billy. And Max and you. Susan.

Hopper had shown up at the house to speak with Neil. When he arrived, he told you to keep Billy in his room, though that hadn’t mattered. The second Billy realized he might actually get out of this, that he might live without fear of his own father, he buried his face in your chest, tears wetting your collarbones, your t-shirt.

You’d let him get it all out, stroking his loose and frizzy curls, occasionally laying your hands over his ears to muffle any shouting. Billy squeezed you each time you did so.

Even if he was a little hopeful this might work, Billy couldn’t help but think about that night when he was a kid. When his mama left him with Neil.

He’d sat on his bedroom floor, trying to be quiet while his dad showered, pleading with her.

“Please mom, don’t do this. Please come home.”

“How long? How long?”

“I miss you.”

She was the last person he felt safe with, before you. And she’d gone, leaving her boy with him. Trapped. Part of him wasn’t sure this would work out. He’d hoped for so long that his mother would return, and she hadn’t. Neil had dictated everything in Billy’s life so far, so how was it possible for anything to change?

Hopper had given Neil Hargrove one option.

“You’re gonna sign these papers,” he’d said, gesturing at the divorce packet lying on the table, “and I’m going to quietly take you down to the station and expose you for the piece of shit you are. Lock you up for abusing your child.”

Neil had started screaming about how Hopper had no right to do any of this, to barge into his home claiming all of this.

“Sure, yeah, pitch a fit. Like that’s gonna change anything,” Hopper said, entertained by the fact that Neil was acting like the victim.

During one of the intervals where your hands were pressed to Billy’s ears, the hoop in the left one biting into your palm, you’d caught something Hopper said.

“I suggest you shut your mouth before you give me something else to report.” By the tone in his voice, you could imagine that he was inches from Neil’s face.

“You’re a coward,” Hopper had said. “Beating on your kid because your life didn’t turn out right. Well let me tell you something, that’s not his fault. It’s yours.”

There’d been a knock on Billy’s bedroom door followed by Hop’s gruff voice.

“Y/N, kiddo can I have a minute with you?”

Billy had looked up at you, eyes puffy. “I’ll be right back baby, I’m not leaving, I promise.”

You’d pressed a kiss to his forehead, and he’d held onto your hand until it was too far out of his reach.

Shutting the door carefully behind you, you’d looked at him. “We’re taking him away,” he said.

You blinked. “Really?”

“Really. He signed, so Susan is good to go.”

Hopper considered letting Neil run away, making him just disappear, but he didn’t want to chance him doing this to someone else. He’d already done that once though, hadn’t he?

“I’m really proud of you for helping him through this, kid. You remind me of your mom.”

His hand had been warm on your shoulder.

“If you want me to be honest, he’s lucky this prison isn’t very big. But that doesn’t mean nothing will happen if others figure out what he’s in for.”

You nodded, knowingly.

“Powell and Callahan just got here. We’re gonna be quiet. No lights, nothing. I don’t want to make this worse for Billy. But if he wants to see, we’re going soon.”

“Thank you, Hopper,” you’d said, hugging him. He’d let you. He’d had his fair share of a shitty father as a kid. Helping someone like Billy is something he’d always wanted to do.

Back in Billy’s room, you’d taken his face in your hands.

“Baby, they’re taking him now. Do you want to watch or stay inside?”

His back had straightened. He knew what he wanted, and he told you as much, so you led him through to the back steps, holding his hand the whole time, Max behind you, resting her chin on her brother's arm.

Billy got to watch them shove his father in the back of a police car, hands behind his back.

He was finally free.

————

Susan pawned most of Neil's more expensive things, that way she'd have money to cover bills for a while and have something to put towards the house payment. She hadn't really been trusted with the financials when Neil was around, aside from basic spending. Now that she had two children to look after, she really didn't want to be in a bad spot.

She had a feeling most newly divorced women would use the money to buy themselves something nice, but she didn't see any point in that. This wasn't about her. This was about making a life where Billy and Max could feel safe.

Even if Billy had whined about it to you at first, having dinner with Max and Susan at least three times a week to start was helping. And he would never admit this, but Susan was actually a pretty damn good cook. Whenever she'd prepared food pre-inmate Neil, they'd been kind of shitty. Billy supposed this had been her tiny form of protest.

It's pretty late now, but Billy is sprawled on the couch watching reruns of whatever. He's really not even entirely sure what's happening on tv. He thinks this might be Cheers. It's the fact that he can be on the couch that he's doing it. He doesn't have any particular reason to hide in his room unless he wants to.

He's missed this couch. It's the same one he's sat on since he was a kid. Since his mother was still around. It was one of the few items that made it to Hawkins when they moved.

Susan has the day off tomorrow. She said so at dinner. Hence why she's still up.

Billy hears her footsteps and looks up when she walks into the room. She gives him a gentle smile.

"I'm making Max some hot chocolate. You feel like some? I have marshmallows too, if you want those."

"Uh, yeah, sure. Thanks."

She smiles again and then disappears for a while before returning with a mug that has a six-year-old Max's hand print on it.

Billy sits up and takes a sip. He can't remember the last time someone made him someone other than you or Nicky made him something like this.

Susan sits down a little ways away from Billy in an oversized chair that Max usually claims as her own. The only time anyone else gets to sit in it are in times like these when she's being forced to do science homework with Dustin yapping in her ear. She'd asked for help, not an entirely new lesson. Dustin did not care.

Susan starts to read a book, and Billy almost forgets she's in the room when she speaks.

"Billy?"

His eyes rove across from the television to her over the top of his mug. She sets the book down.

"I just wanted to apologize. For not doing anything to protect you from your dad. I don't really have a reason other than selfish ones, like I was afraid he'd start on me, or Max. I guess I just thought if he got it out things would be okay." She buries her face in her hands.

"God, I'm so sorry, Billy. This is your home, and I came into your life and took you away from where you'd grown up, and I never stopped to think about what it was doing to you. I was only thinking about myself."

“I should’ve helped take care of you. You were just a kid. You’re still just a kid. And I’ve done nothing but let you down. I want to be better. I’m not saying I want to replace your mom or anything, but I don’t want you to feel unsafe or unwelcome here anymore.”

Billy keeps drinking his hot chocolate but he has to hold it with both hands because they’re shaking now.

“I feel like I don’t even know you. And maybe that’s because you didn’t want to know me, or maybe because I just avoided you.”

“I’m just so sorry, Billy. I want to try. I am trying. The both of you deserve so much better and you don’t have to accept this. I just wanted you to know that and that I care about you.”

Billy is quiet and for a moment it scares Susan, but she understands he might not have anything to say. He might not want to say anything. He might be waiting until he can afford to move out of this fucking house.

But Billy finally sets his mug down. It’s empty. He looks at Susan and he nods.

“It’s okay,” he tells her. “I understand. I don’t blame you and I appreciate that you want to try. I want to try, too.”

Susan nods back, a sweet smile on her face. It’s gentle, the look she’s giving him.

Billy does understand though. His being the target of Neil’s abuse prevented both Max and Susan from it. He understands that Susan was afraid of her husband and the man that she might not have known he’d unveil to be. She was scared. He understands.

He’s willing to try. To let her in.

She stands and picks up Billy’s empty cup. “Was it okay?” she asks, “It’s just the store bought kind.”

“Yeah. Yeah it was great.”

When she grins at him she looks young. She looks tired and upset, but maybe that’s a good thing. Maybe it means change. Maybe it means she’s learning. She’s trying.

————

“Wear mine.”

Billy looks at you through the mirror in front of which he’s been primping. He claims he doesn’t like it when you say he’s “getting pretty.” His blush says otherwise.

“Yours?”

He rolls his eyes and puts down the hairspray he was holding. “Yeah. It’s fuckin’ cold tonight. Just put mine on. I don’t want you to walk all the way back to your house just to get something I have.”

You snort, making for his closet door. “All the way back?”

He bumps your hip with his, a common you-little-shit gesture.

“Because I live so far away.” You greet the pornstar taped to the thin wood before sliding it open.

“Should be on the right,” Billy says, ignoring your comment and shoving cologne down the front of his pants while you aren’t looking. It’s a habit at this point. Shit, he doesn’t even think about it, and he knows he doesn’t have to impress you.

You push around the clothing hanging in his closet, a couple button-ups, leather, a sweater you’ve never seen him in. It’s this cream color, thick and cable knit. You pull it out.

“How come you don’t wear this?” you ask, holding it up to him. He unsnaps another button from his shirt and your eyes follow the movement even though you don’t mean to ogle.

Billy looks the sweater up and down like it’s grossing him out. “I wore it once,” he tells you.

“Once,” you mock playfully, putting the shirt back into his closet.

Billy’s hands are on your hips in an instant, spinning you around. “I thought you were getting a jacket, not raiding my belongings.”

You stick your tongue out at him. It’s childish and you know it, but you do it anyway. He smacks your ass in retaliation, and you go to squeeze his but he grabs your wrist, pulling it to his mouth so that he can kiss your pulse point.

“Barf.” The voice makes you turn your head, and Max has pushed the door open fully where it had been cracked.

“Hi, Max,” you say, pulling your hand from Billy’s grasp, even if he pouts, and moving to actually retrieve the denim jacket you’d been instructed to wear.

You can feel Billy and Max staring at each other. “What do you need?” he asks her.

“Just came to see if we were planning on leaving today or if I should maybe hitch a ride elsewhere.” She enters the room and sits down on the edge of her brother’s bed.

Billy glances at his watch. “You said to have you at El’s by seven-thirty. We’ve got time.”

She crosses her arms and Billy faces the mirror again. He thinks he’s finished. “Did you even finish packing your bag, shithead?”

You shove your arms through the jacket sleeves, looking at Max. She raises her eyebrows. No, she definitely did not. There’s a flash of red hair as she hops up, and then she’s gone, the sound of dresser drawers being yanked open and shut echoing down the hall.

You start rolling up the cuffs, and Billy reaches for the collar, adjusting it for you. You’re focused on getting your hands free when you feel Billy’s finger lifting your chin up. He brings his lips to yours, kissing you once. He pulls away and you move back in, wanting one more. He obliges, albeit grinning at your eagerness. When you’ve gotten your fill, you kiss his cheek, and that’s the one that makes him blush.

He moves away from you, pulling on his own jacket. “I’m gonna go start the car, okay?”

“M’kay.”

Max let it slip once that Billy always went out to warm up the car before taking them to school. She wouldn’t have assumed it was for her right off the bat, but when she realized he didn’t do that when it was just him in the car, she figured out it was him being nice. Now he just does it for the both of you. You won’t ever say anything about it.

You look at yourself in Billy’s mirror, listening to his footsteps down the hall and out into the living room. You put your hands in the pockets of his jacket, and to your surprise you feel something. It’s not spare change, or a lighter–anything you would’ve expected to find.

It’s a sheet of paper. You pull it out, thinking it might be homework he tucked away or a receipt or something. It’s not, though. It’s notebook paper, and it’s been neatly folded like it was done with purpose.

You sit on the edge of Billy’s bed, and unfold it. To your surprise, it’s a page covered in his handwriting, that pretty, sometimes faintly cursive scrawl. There are some lines scratched out because he used a pen and couldn’t erase. But the thing that catches your eye is the very first line. It’s just your name. It’s a letter. A letter for you.

Your heart starts to race and you find yourself beginning to read, sinking further into his mattress.

There’s something I’ve been wanting to talk to you about, it reads.

Feelings. Jesus. The truth is, for so long I’d forgotten what those were. I’ve been stuck in one place. In a cave, you might say. A deep, dark cave. And then I sat with you at lunch, and bought you a book, and suddenly you were part of my life. For the first time in a long time, I started to feel things again. I started to feel happy.

But, tonight I’ve been feeling distant from you. Like I’m pulling away from you or something. I’m sitting here and I’m thinking about the way you looked at me that first night at the record store. The way you held on to me when I slept over for the first time. I’m not even sure if you remember it, but every time I tried to move throughout the night you whined like you were afraid I was going to leave you. Like you needed me.

But you didn’t know about my dad or that I was falling in love with you then. And I can’t stop thinking about how I raised my voice at you when I came over today.

You pause, realizing when it was that he wrote this. The day he fought back.

And I’ve been afraid for so long that I might turn out like him. That I might be just the same. And I’ve been scared that you might realize that too and leave me behind. But I didn’t feel that way today when you spoke to me like a human being and you wanted to work things out. I’m changing. You’re changing me. We’re changing. And I guess, if I’m being really honest, that’s what scares me. I don’t want things to change. Because there’s a part of me that worries you might still change your mind. The rest of me knows you won’t.

So I think maybe what I’m saying is that when you didn’t know about how I felt or who I really am on the inside that it didn’t feel like I’d lose you. But now I’ve let you in and you can see all of me. And now that you’ve said you love me I really don’t want things to change. I don’t want to lose you or want you to go.

But I know that’s naive. To think you’ll leave. That’s not who you are. I know you’d look at me and say that’s not how this is going to work.

My whole life everyone has picked someone else over me. Left me behind. Left me on my own. And I know that’s how life works. It’s moving. Always moving and people change whether you like it or not. But you’ve taught me that change can be good. That it doesn’t always mean people changing their mind about me. About caring about me or that I’m good enough to keep around.

And sometimes change is painful. Sometimes it’s sad and sometimes it’s surprising.

Happy.

So you know what? I don’t think change is bad anymore. I think I’m supposed to learn from it. I think that when life hurts, because I know parts of it are going to hurt and there will be things that always hurt, I should remember it. Because the hurt is good. It means I’m out of that cave.

I just want you to hold my hand while I figure it all out.

You finish reading and fold the letter back up, putting it back where you found it. You hadn’t realized you were crying, but you were, and you spend the next few minutes fixing yourself in Billy’s mirror.

When he returns he thinks you’re the one primping.

“Ready, baby?” he asks. “Max is in the car.”

You turn to him, and he smiles at you. That pretty, pretty smile. You kiss him on both cheeks and then shut off his bedroom light.

“I’m ready.”

————

Billy pulls away from Hop’s cabin after dropping Max off, but he’s quick to stop the car again.

You were quiet the whole way there. Sweet as always, no doubt, but it was clear something was bothering you. He doesn’t like it when things upset his girl.

“What are you doing, Hargrove? We’re gonna miss the movie if you keep this up.”

He raises his eyebrows at you. “Well excuse the hell outta me, hon’.”

You slap your hands against your face, peeking through your fingers at him in hopes that he’ll go ahead and scold you.

“I want you to tell me what’s wrong, baby.” Billy doesn’t have to elaborate. You never seem to have to explain your feelings to him much anymore. It’s like he’s figuring you out, like he understands and knows when something’s bugging you or if you’re hurting.

“It’s nothing bad, I promise,” you say.

“That doesn’t mean I don’t want to know.”

You nod, and reach into the pocket of the jacket, pulling free the paper. It’s seconds before Billy sees the striped sheet that he remembers what it is, what he’d left in there.

It all comes back to him, his wrist hurting from pouring his heart out, the relief he felt at putting his feelings somewhere.

You hand it to him. He unfolds it and scans it over. “You read it?” He knows you did.

“Yeah.” You smile shyly at him, and it’s the same smile you gave him that very first night that you came to check on him. Billy wants to kiss you, so he leans over the center console and does; he presses his mouth to your forehead, warm and sweet. His presence is all-encompassing: heady cologne, minty gum. So very Billy. So much like home.

He hands the paper back to you. “Feelings, huh?” he says, his mouth pulling up at the corners.

“Feelings.”

You sandwich your hands between your thighs, taking a deep breath. Your eyes start to water and you can’t help it.

“Billy, I would never leave you, okay?” You were hoping the tears wouldn’t spill over, but it doesn’t matter because your voice fails you. It wavers and you sound fragile, young. And then he’s taking your face in his hands, wiping under your eyes even though there isn’t anything to wipe yet, just soothing motions over the apples of your cheeks, calloused thumbs and warm skin.

He stares at you, his eye contact unbreaking. When he looks at you like that, blue eyes boring into yours, you can’t help but feel a little full. Because he’s looking at you like that. You.

“I know that. I know.”

You nod, and he nods with you, so much that it looks silly, the both of you nodding, and you start to laugh.

“I made you feel that way? Really?”

“Of course you did,” Billy says. “My whole life I’ve felt like I’m like a black hole or somethin’. You don’t make me feel that way.”

Your heart aches for him. For this boy who’s had no one tell him how good he is. Who’s finally let you in. Who’s finally realized he can have better, and that he deserves to.

“I love you, Billy.”

He kisses you on each cheek, your face warm against his lips. He grins and you can feel it on your face.

“I love you too.”

When you get to the movie theater, you do pay for popcorn, and you do hand him the snacks you kept in your bag after you take your seats. Your mother said movie candy was getting much too expensive.

You pop a handful of Sno Caps in your mouth, and Billy opens his mouth. You sprinkle some in his, and then reach for his hand.

He looks down at your clasped fingers while a kid almost faceplants with a bucket of popcorn on the way up the stairs. Thankfully their father caught them first.

“You did say you wanted me to hold your hand.”

“I did,” Billy says.

—————

“Sit still, I’ll be right back, I swear.”

Billy crosses his arms, but it’s hard for him to look entirely brooding when he’s got plum shadow on his eyelids. You stand. “Here, Max, supervise.” You hand her the brush between your fingers, and she snorts at her brother from where she lays across your bed.

You make for the living room, suppressing a grin at the sounds of laughter emanating from the area. Susan and Nicky sit on opposite sides of the couch, watching The Golden Girls and talking about whatever it is that mothers-of-dating-children talk about.

“Mom,” you say, coming to a stop in front of her.

“Hi, honeybee. What’s the matter?”

“Can I use some of your makeup? There’s some things you’ve got that I haven’t and–”

She smiles at you, adjusting the well-loved pillow squished behind her back. “You know you can. Whatever you need.”

Her grin is contagious, and you find yourself smiling back just the same. “Thank you.”

She nods. “Playing dress up?” Your mother gives you a knowing look, thinking about the idea you’d had in mind ever since you watched Rocky Horror with Billy that first time.

“You could say so,” you tell her, and then you’re off to raid her bathroom cabinet, pulling free the large and full bag of goodies.

You start to rifle through the corduroy pouch, but decide it’d be easier to take the whole thing with you to your room, so that’s what you do.

When you return, you settle on your knees in front of your boyfriend, still finding it odd that you get to call him that now, even if that is exactly what he is to you. Your pretty, pretty boyfriend. Your boyfriend who’s letting you do his makeup.

Max hands you your brush back, raising herself up on her elbows so that she can watch the show better.

“Hi,” you say to him, pressing a kiss on the tip of his nose.

“Hi,” he responds, his voice showing all signs that he’s both enjoying this, yet also grumping about the fact that he let you do it in the first place. He settles back on his hands, legs spread so that you can sit in between them and reach him. You pull free both the pencil of thick liner you’d been looking for, and a pot of blush you know to be much pinker than the one you’ve got. Yours has also been broken on multiple occasions so that now it’s just little bits of pink powder sliding around in the pan.

You uncap the liner first, a warm brown shade, clearly freshly sharpened by your mother. “Close your eyes, pretty please,” you tell him. He obliges, lids fluttering shut.

You reach out, and starting to drag the tip of the pencil across his skin, you realize your hand isn’t as steady as you’d like, considering the fact that you’re also half-focused on not kneeing Billy in a place you’re quite sure he’d prefer to not be kneed.

You let out a frustrated sigh, and Billy blinks up at you. “What’s wrong?”

“This isn’t working. Just–” You shove the eyeliner pencil into his hands, and then move from between his legs. You grip his calves and move his legs together, then crawl forwards a little and straddle his lap.

He grins up at you, a cocky and mischievous look. “Comfy?”

“Shut up and close your eyes again.”

“Well you don’t want much.”

You pinch the squish of his side and he swats blindly at your arm. You take Billy’s face in your hand, resting the pinky of your dominant one against his cheekbone. This go around you’re able to drag the liner effectively across his eyelid. A tap at his face signals he needs to look up, and when he does, you do the same to his lower hip. Afterwards, you take a super small brush that Max found and use it to smudge the eyeliner out some, that way the lines aren’t so harsh.

You finish and take Billy’s face in your hands again, turning it to face Max. “Thoughts?”

She taps her chin, though smiling all the same. “Very nice.”

With a little more manhandling, you get some mascara on those lashes of his, though not without a little pleased squeaking in the process. It’s at the blush that you get excited enough to make him laugh. You swipe your brush heavily across his cheeks, and then the tip of his nose, where you’re probably much too generous. You don’t care. He looks so, so pretty, all blushy like this.

“Part your lips.” You say, thumb tugging at his bottom one. You put a gloss on Billy’s lips and almost lose it for good. He’s so gorgeous.

When you finish, you wipe your hands clean on a towel and back up a little ways from him to survey your work.

You clap your hands. “Max, help me. Would you look at this?”

She does, laughing gleefully. “Oh my god, this is so good.”

You look Billy in the eyes, and Max hops up off of your bed to get a better look. “You look so gorgeous, my love.”

He’s thankful for the blush in that moment, because without it you’d see the effect your using that name had on him.

“Thank you,” he says.

“Wanna see?” God, you look so happy.

“Do I have to?”

You bite your lip and Billy pulls it free, taking the little handheld mirror from you.

And, honestly, he thinks he looks kinda hot. You picked a good eyeshadow color, one that makes his blue eyes stand out even more, and he just looks pretty. Just as you’d said.

“Do you like it?”

“Yes. You did a very good job.”

He goes to kiss you, but you stop him. “Nope. You’ll mess up my work!”

Billy rolls his eyes and flips Max a bird when he sees her giggling at your enthusiasm and his compliance.

“Can I take a picture?” you ask.

Billy holds up his hands. “Oh hell no.”

“Billy, she needs to document her masterpiece,” Max says, though really she knows it’d make great blackmail. That and she loves how happy the both of you seem. She’d like to remember this too.

“Please?” You give him your very best puppy dog eyes, making sure they’re watery and everything. You know he’ll give in.

“Fine. But you show this to anyone, and you’re both dead.”

You laugh, grabbing for your Polaroid camera. “Who the fuck do you think I’m gonna show? Everyone I know is in this room.”

Billy’s smiles then, and you’re just quick enough to catch it. You get another after you kiss his sparkly forehead. And when you’ve finished, you stick them in the frame of your mirror so they’ll always be there.

That night, after Max and Susan have gone home, you sit in the bathroom to help Billy wash the makeup off, but only when you’d let Nicky see, and she thought he looked stunning. Showstopping, she’d said.

And it’s then, as you wipe the rosy tinge from his cheeks, revealing his freckles once again, that you realize months before this you’d been so alone. You’d ached for a moment like this.

And here you were. So even if the journey to get here had hurt, even if it’d been hard and pushed you to your limits, it’s okay. Because that’s how life works. It hurts sometimes. And that’s okay.

Because the hurt? The hurt is good.

————

please let me know if you liked this! feedback is always appreciated!! comments and reblogs mean more than you know. <33

#billy hargrove #billy hargrove x you #billy hargrove x reader #billy hargrove x fem!reader #billy hargrove x y/n #billy hargrove fic #billy hargrove fanfic #billy hargrove fanfiction #billy stranger things fic #billy stranger things #billy hargrove imagine #billy hargrove series #billy hargrove angst #billy hargrove comfort #billy hargrove fluff #jim hopper #max mayfield #billy hargrove x female reader #savannah’s fics

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dumplingsjinson · 2 years ago

Note

I LOVED your new years one thank youuuuu may I request some royalty prompts/dialogue? Like maybe a royal x a royal OR royal x servant if possible please~

(happy new years btw hope you have a decent 2023). 🥂

(A late ass happy new year and I hope 2023 has been decent to you so far!)

List of “royal x royal” prompts

“This castle’s ground is all that I ever knew, until I met you — you, who brought me a whole new perspective of the world beyond these walls. And God, is it fucking beautiful when I’m experiencing it beside you.”

“My father hates you.” “Trust me, I know. My father hates me too, but I’m the only child who can inherit the throne so… You know. It’s rough out here.”

“You’re indebted to me for life, love.” “…Fuck you.”

“We shouldn’t be doing this. We might run the risk of getting caught,” Character A murmurs as Character B’s hand settles on the small of their back. “Tell me you don’t want this and I’ll stop,” Character B says, staring into Character A’s eyes. Character A doesn’t say anything in response, and Character B smiles, hand straying further down. “Thought so.”

“I promise you I’ll do whatever it takes to take you down.” “And so will I.”

“I don’t want to take the throne. I don’t want any of this. I never asked for this.” “…Neither do I. Let’s… Let’s run away together? To somewhere else, where no one can find us. Where we don’t have to hide; where we don’t have to be under the control of our own parents.”

“What the fuck are you doing here?!” “I came to see you, what do you think?”

“How did you get into my room?!” “Might have sneaked past the guards and bribed some of the weaker ones who saw me and injured the ones who tried to fight me?”

Throwing cursory glances at each other whenever their families are in the same room as each other.

“We’re destined to be enemies, not lovers. At least not in this life. We’re not meant to be.” “I don’t care. Fuck destiny, we’ll make our own destiny if it means I get to be with you.”

List of “royal x servant” prompts

“You’ve been there for me since we were kids. You’re my best friend. You’ve been through the good and the bad with me. You’ve never left my side, and maybe you didn’t have a choice in the matter, but you never gave me any indicators that you wanted to abandon me. You’re everything I could ever want. I’m not letting them you send you away like this.”

“The thing is, you can give me anything in the world but yourself. You’ve given the world yourself, but you can’t give the same to me. And I don’t want anything but you.”

“Let’s elope.” “I can’t make you throw away everything just to—” “I don’t want any of those things anyways. I never asked for them. I want you, and only you.”

“Can you come into my room for a second?” “But—” “Do as I say before I make you.”

“What’s all of this?” “I bought all of this for you.” “You know you can’t just worm your way into someone’s heart with money, right?”

“Me or the throne?” “God, don’t fucking do this—” “Did I stutter? Me? Or the Throne?”

“Sir/Madam—” “I told you to use my name.”

“Did you ever think that maybe this isn’t going to work out? If you truly loved me, then you’d let me go and find someone I can actually be with.” “…But do you really want me to let you go?”

“You need to get off your high horse; you’re not better than anyone else just because you have your whole life planned out for you. Destined to sit and die on that throne, or have someone murder you in cold blood to take your place, and then being remembered as the one who died to some backstabbing asshole; a little sad, don’t you think?” “…No one else other than you speaks to me like this. It’s hot. Keep talking.”

“Status? That doesn’t mean shit if you’re not by my side.” Character A sighs, running their fingers through their hair, their head drooping. “Just— I’m sorry, I know it’s selfish for me to say, but please don’t leave. I’ve only ever had you. You’re the only one who can look me in the eyes and tell me how it is; the only one who understands what I really want. The only one who understands the real me.”

#long post #i was SOOO EXCITED TO POST THIS LMFAOOO #this isn’t a trope i usually would write for but GOD #i do love the ideas of these #i know you said OR but… i wanted to do both #writing prompts #otp prompts #angst prompts #royalty prompts #royal prompts #royal x servant #royal x royal #prompts #dialogue prompts #enemies to lovers prompts #enemies with benefits prompts #forbidden love prompts #secret love prompts #request

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cashmoneyyysstuff · 9 months ago

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hi bestie do u have any ff writing advice ?? ur flow and imagery and STYLE is so so good i love it. how do u come up with such good ideas??

hi ! first of all thank you SOOOOOO much that means sm to me it genuinely makes me so happy to know that you enjoy my writing. !!

speaking of writing..it took me a while to figure out a system i was comfortable with. i'm a little all over the place in general and that translates a lot in my drafts ESPECIALLY LMFAOO if you caught one glance at my drafts it's mostly just a prompt of a few sentences and w spelling mistakes in every word cus i write them down so fast so as not to forget them LMFAOOO. but it really works for me !

i know a lot of people say it but it really works, literally just write ! it doesn't have to come out as a full beautifully crafted piece immediately, just write down anything you can and polish it up all you want later ! forcing inspiration to come to you almost always has the opposite effect, for me anyways !

for flow, i think i like to mostly write dialogue between characters out first and then write my descriptions and actions around that ! i always get more excited about writing dialogue more than descriptions (not that those can't be fun ofc !)

oh , this might help for imagery ! and idk if you've noticed but the structure of a lot of my writing is heavily based on animes and manga. like the set ups and punchlines. (massive nerd ik) like if you read some of my one shot's like this one, this one (probably one of my fav fics i've done btw) or my first born series FBRC, (especially this part) (this part was actually the one i was most excited to write, and it's heavily based off of kobayashi's dragon maid's actual good and not weird moments and soundtrack, listening to music also helps me out a lot too!)

i try to model my speech to what i think an anime episode of the scenario i thought about would look like. visualizing my writing helps me write a lot as well, if that helps ! a little fun fact for you, fujimoto's writing has influenced a lot of the way i describe situations in fics, since i really like the sorta 'childish' descriptions over super fancy ones (cus i can't write those, but i don't really like them veerry much, but a lot of them are enjoyable to read!!) i find it very endearing and it's one of the reasons why i enjoy writing childhood friends to lovers so much. it's this sorta simplistic level of thinkin that kids have if that makes sense and it works out really well if you wanna write fluffy pieces if that makes sense

some examples ! :

"he drags you around a little too hard but it's to show you something he knows you'd like and you repay him by being patient with him and letting him drag you around to his hearts content. he let’s you use the crayons he’d just denied another classmate seconds ago and when it’s really early in the morning and you’re still sleepy unlike your more energetic friend, he waits for you. sitting with you in the reading corner quietly commenting on a little bit of everything in the book you’re sharing until you’re awake enough to start the day because katsuki wanted you to be together through anything no matter what, starting the day without you was simply unimaginable."

"despite his quieter presence he always seemed to stand out to you. his bag is big enough to carry everything he needs without having to shove anything inside or leaving it half opened. he wipes his mouth with a tissue after he's done eating his lunch alone and his handwriting is pretty. his lashes are long and he's pretty."

"you hated it when people said that because the shoto you knew wasn't like that. he knew people talked about him and he hated being associated with his father. he likes the caramel you sneak in for him at school and you like the way his eyes light up when he guesses the flavour of fruit candies you make him taste. the shoto you know that ties your shoes for you and shares his umbrella with you, the one who half heartedly stomps into wet puddles with you, the one with the pretty lashes and pretty smile and pretty handwriting isn't like that."

there are a lot of other examples (im OBSESSED with this trope can you tell.) i like these sorts of simplistic childish ways of love. tiny little specks of affection that make the heart so much fonder in such little big ways..if that makes sense :>

i dunno if im just very..special, but since i have a lot of oc's and scenarios constantly flowing in my brain, most of my ideas just tend to be what i dreamed about the night before, or what i daydreamed about LMAOO. even random things that happened to me at school sorta go from "oh it would be funny if this happened to [insert character]" and then they snowball into more and more thorough ideas !

and of course as cheesy as it is the most important part is to have fun ! i cannot stress enough how important it is to be in the mindset when you're writing. it's like when people say to force yourself to draw so you don't 'lose it.' and i do think it can work to jog inspiration, but i believe that as long as you enjoy it, you'll never truly lose it. so i say, write when you feel like it and don't write if you don't, it can truly be very draining. but it's all up to what feels better for you !

anyways, i hope my insane ramblings helped you out a little bit, and have fun writing !!

much luv xxx

#cash's recs !#cash speaks <3 #cash is rambling !#cash tips !#writing #creative writing #inspiration #writing inspo #writing inspiration #cash responds :p #hope this helps #<333 !!#me after saying “if that makes sense” after every sentence #:P

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cienie-isengardu · 11 months ago

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No offense but I imagine the Lin Kuei might have had a bit of an issue with the language barrier given Tomas probably didn't speak English and assuming he did, it was probably broken English.

Bi-Han and Kuai are just staring at him trying to decipher what the fuck he's saying and it's a really bad first impression and utterly cringe worthy because Tomas is tripping over himself trying to sound coherent and it's backfiring.

I’m here for the language barrier as Tomas comes from a totally different culture than Lin Kuei, however considering how little we know about his family, especially why they were so far away from home (Prague), I’m not sure if Tomas even spoke English before he was adopted by Grandmaster. The BIO and intro dialogues doesn’t paint one, coherent picture why they were hunting[*] on Lin Kuei territory, but as Smoke’s ending points out, he was with Lin Kuei for around 15 years (“It was looking at myself, fifteen years ago. I would've ended up just like him, if Lin Kuei hadn't taken me in”). We do not know how old Tomas is during the events presented in story mode, but I think assuming he is in his 20s is a safe bet and thus there is a real chance he was less than 8-10 years old when his family died. Again, we have no idea why Tomas’ family traveled so far from Europe, but if they were hiding from something or someone, they could on purpose avoid contact with people and in result Tomas had not an opportunity to learn different language(s) outside of his native one. Of course, he could attend school at some point before his family moved on to Asia or the parents could teach him English or any other language just in case, but we have no idea how Tomas’ life looked nor how well educated he was. So I wouldn’t cross out the possibility Tomas spoke only Czech - the same as we do not have an idea when Bi-Han and Kuai Liang started learning English, as this is not their native language either.

But the most important thing is, Tomas being unable to speak English or communicate with Grandmaster’s sons is hardly the first - and bad - impression he would make on Kuai Liang and Bi-Han. He was a kid who witnessed the death of his family and then was forced to live with a clan responsible for this merciless act. As we know Tomas as a kid did not consider being adopted by Grandmaster as anything good, he could on purpose refuse to learn the dialect used by Lin Kuei** and/or talk in any other language than his own native one - or show his justified resentment in more drastic ways. The communication barrier was, as I imagine, only partially created by lack of skills and more by lack of will to interact with the murders of his family.

So I think Tomas on his own wanting to communicate with Kuai Liang or Bi-Han, no matter how broken his English or Lin Kuei dialect was, could be seen as a great improvement compared to his resentment, anger, maybe agression and generally speaking trauma.

That said, I’m pretty sure there is plenty of hilarious stories about their earliest attempts at communication. Sadly, tie-in material does not provide any anecdotes about that :(

[*] Tomas' family hunting as a means for survival or hunting solely for fun builds a very different impression of who they were.

[**] I don’t have an idea what exactly language Lin Kuei use on daily basis, just throwing here an idea that since they live in hiding for centuries, their speech patterns could be considered as outdated compared to the official language(s) of China (as I assume Lin Kuei are still somewhere there stationed) and after such long time of isolation from world, Lin Kuei has their own unique dialect.

#mortal kombat #my replies #tomas vrbada #smoke #lin kuei #kuai liang #bi han4 #look i get why using english as a common language make everything easier #but i'm here for characters speaking in their native languages #and especially tomas speaking czech as europe culture is not just that damn english

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halliescomut · 1 year ago

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My Personal Weatherman Ep 7- No Subs watch

Again a reminder, this is me reacting to the new episode of MPW that I get from an internet friend-y, but unfortunately (for me) they speak Japanese, but I do not, and the link they send has no subtitles, so I have no idea what anyone is saying. In fairness...I have been watching Japanese series for about 2 decades, so I can pick up on a couple words/phrases, but mostly my goal is to observe body language to kind of guess what the story is. It's a fun, silly little game. There may be moderate spoilers about sequences, though I try to keep things vague, and of course no dialogue spoilers. Let's go!

-Oooh! An on location segment for the weather. How exciting! (ALso I swear it looks like the location is just outside of Man-san's apartment building, and that's why they had the camera framed so close in.) And Yoh still watching Mizuki so closely.

-Oh, we have ARCs...is this actually a few weeks later, or is the BL manga publishing industry able to do a two day turn around?

-Man-san sounds very encouraging, at least.

-That is a clearly depressed and defeated Segasaki. Poor guy. Has still no one explained that Man-san's husband isn't after Yoh?? Really?

-Why is Yoh always so goddamn suspicious??? My god dude.

-I will say also, I don't love Mizuki's tone here, but I think that's me relating a bit too much to Yoh (since we're both on the same side of a D/s dynamic). I know I would be really upset to hear that distance in in Mizuki's voice if I were Yoh.

-Now we're getting the flashbacks from Mizuki's POV....interesting. I can't wait to know what he was thinking when he saw Yoh. His face is so precious.

-^^Literally all I could hear in my head at this scene: "Hands touch, eyes meet/Sudden silence, sudden heat/Hearts leap in a giddy whirl"

-Segasaki's college friends feel very much like friends of convenience. Like when you become best friends with a kid when you're 7, but it's mostly because you live in the same neighborhood.

-Aww, now we have Yoh in a cozy sweater.

-It is so sub of Yoh to just hand over his sketchbook without question, completely forgetting all of the portraits of Segasaki in there...and I REALLY wanna translate what Segasaki's response was, but I will wait.

-IDK what Segasaki is saying exactly, but I'd bet real folding money that's something pretty close to 'no matter what I couldn't stop thinking about him"

-The way Yoh came and grabbed him...what's going on??

-Aww, sick baby Mizuki. So cute. And the costuming makes them a matching set with their beige and blue. That's so cute.

-I just spent the last scene going like this, so....

-But now we have THE CURRY!!! The curry that made Segasaki finish falling in love with Yoh. I don't feel like curry is supposed to be that crunchy...but I could be wrong.

-His face, I'm dying.. And the little bonk on the head. Oh, if I wasn't already head over heels for these two dinguses, this would have been the last straw for me as well.

-Mizuki's love for petting Yoh is so fucking CUTE!!!!

-Yoh's smile as he draws Segasaki- so PRECIOUS!!!! (Sorry I keep yellling.)

-Poor Mizuki's face. 🥺🥺🥺 He really thought for a minute that Yoh left again.

-Dripping wet rain kiss!! We love it!!!

-Ooh...ooh....OOH!!!! God I really wanna translate Mizuki's little speech here, but I'm pretty sure the gist was 'you're mine, and I'm not letting you get away again". 🥵☺️😁🥰

This was an excellent episode. I mean the whole series has been, but this just....so good. I can't wait to understand more than 27% of it.

Finale next week (Booo!!!😠) but I will be happy to be able to watch the complete story over and over into forever. That'll be nice. Honestly this is the first BL I've every considered getting a physical copy of it's so good.

#My personal weatherman #Taikan yoho #mizuki x yoh #segasaki x yoh #segasaki mizuki #yoh tanada #mashiko atsuki #higuchi kouhei

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woodchipp · 2 months ago

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hello, this is out of the blue, but i just wanted to say that i stumbled upon your blog a few days ago and your opinions about OMORI are really refreshing to see, compared to what i usually see in the fandom (even tho i don't interact with it that much outside of my own work). you don't have to answer to this, but i feel like you're a person i can have an open discussion with when it comes to criticism. we know the game has a lot of issues regarding the plot, but i wanna add one more thing to that, one that i rarely see people discuss: the dialogue.

i like omori, but the dialogue is just... lacking. as a person who writes and makes comics, i have a saying: no matter how short the dialogue might be, it should always *mean* something. it should always entertain and add something to the plot or the character's personality or background (of course, not in an over the top way, but in a way that you can actually tell who's talking if you don't see their faces). the dialogue in omori is... long. i've watched many friends and streamers play and a big chunk of them complain about the dialogue's length. that shouldn't be a problem. a lot of it is meaningless and doesn't add anything to the plot and doesn't really establish anything about the characters. (flavour text can be fun if you know how to actually write it) i won't even mention sunny, who only speaks a sentence in the entirety of the game (it's not that deep and rewarding when the game can take you more than 20 hrs). i like silent protagonists, i really do, but i don't feel like this should have been an element at all.

to me, the best dialogue belongs to sweetheart because it is iconic and bold. i know the cast is kids, but come on now. when your entire cast has same face syndrome, can't you at least make their personalities and dialogue pop? especially in headspace when they are more like caricatures than real people, i suppose?

i don't know. i have a lot more to say but this is getting long! so yeah, just wanted to know what you think about the dialogue. i didn't type this to the best of my abilities, but i hope it's somewhat readable. hope you have a nice day!

No need to worry - you're absolutely right! In fact, I've briefly touched on the dialogue in the second part of my critique

The dialogue doesn’t sound authentic either - Hero hamfistedly espouses morals the way you’d expect a children’s show to while Aubrey’s conversation with Sunny on the swings on One Day Left has her dispense advice you would expect to hear from a clinical professional.

but couldn't elaborate further since I didn't know how to. You took the words right out of my mouth, so frankly, I have very little to add 😅

(of course, not in an over the top way, but in a way that you can actually tell who's talking if you don't see their faces).

I recall showing a friend of mine a conversation between 3 characters (Kel, Aubrey and Hero, I think) without the names and asking them to guess who the characters having the conversation were based on the lines alone.

They couldn't distinguish Kel's lines from Hero's. peak writing

a lot of it is meaningless and doesn't add anything to the plot and doesn't really establish anything about the characters.

The most likely reason for this would be Omocat's apparent belief the characters are inherently loveable.

(Note the phrasing. They're stating the characters are loveable, as if it is an objective truth.)

They seem to have started from the conclusion of "My characters are wonderful" and worked backwards from there, assuming everybody's going to adore the characters because they do, so they didn't feel the need to put in the work to make them compelling/believable. And the dialogue, of course, reflects that.

It's funny they seem to have been right... for the wrong reasons. Sure, the game's main cast is loved by its fandom - if only because the fans see the characters as blank slates to project themselves onto.

#omori #omori game #omori fandom

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faislittlewhiteraven · 11 months ago

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Fai's Fic Ramble: The GorseTale AU (bare basics)

Ever since roughly... 2017 I think, there been a single Undertale fanfic I've been tapping away at and though it's nowhere near done or even organised enough for me to think about posting chapter 1 on A03, I recently posted a spinoff fic related to it called Eight Coloured Picture about the deaths of all the fallen humans and how some monsters each time were effected by their passing, and well.

I wanna ramble about the main story that fic comes from for a bit!

So.

Working Title: 'Gorse, Blackthorn and Buttercups' I also call it GorseTale in my head for short since Gaijin Goombah's rather fun video on why Undertale's Golden Flowers are most likely Gorse was a HUGE inspiration for the fic back when I started out (it's er changed quiet a bit since then but I'm keeping the flower vibes because Chara likes them and I did way too much research into both practical and symbolic uses for plants in the Underground for this fic not to use at least some of it at some point XD).

Core premise: Story is a Slice of Life/Drama AU set around Frisk being born in the Underground and taken in by Toriel right around the time of 'Undertale canon' (for Undertale Yellow fans, roughly a year or so after Clover's death), and through a series of domino effects stemming from that, various monsters of the Underground are confronted with the flaws of both themselves and their kingdom, and as a result start putting in effort to try fixing things so the little human child they've become so attached to can actually live their life to the fullest without fear of being murdered just for being born a non monster.

Aka: Toriel and Sans experience the joys and terror of co-parenting a child who only survives past the age of 3 because they have phenomenal cosmic power. Papyrus discovers the Royal Guard is NOT in fact something he wants to join (and accidentally becomes politically active in an effort to right by his new nibbling). Undyne takes some time to really rethink her career path and motives. Alphys somehow manages to turn former mistakes into miracles (oh and cures death maybe). Mettaton learns to take time off and share the spotlight, and finally King Asgore gets a surprising amount of hope in encouraging peaceful rebellion against his own accidental dictatorship.

Main cast: Rotates a bit since every major monster (and Flowey) matters in this and who's most in focus depends on the exact arc but Toriel, Sans, Papyrus, Chara and Frisk are the ones who I have the most planned scenes for since well, they're where the 'domino effect' starts.

Ships: Fic is pretty gen for the most part but leaning Undyne/Alphys, Papyrus/Mettaton (who knew all Paps needed to become popular was to openly try convincing monster kind that killing all the humans is wrong in front of a very specific underground star XD), and some very very very slowburn Sans/Toriel (is teased throughout the story because Sans IS Frisk's other parent Sans just means 'Dad' in Frisk speak and I find various Monsters' "Wait Sans has a kid- Wait Sans is married?!" reactions hilarious (Paps giving 'context' to why he suddenly has a nibbling to Undyne especially) but actual, real Soriel doesn't happen until near the very end because Toriel is Not Ok, Sans leans AroAce/Demi and both agree that while the odd kiss, hug or 'real talk' is fine neither up for anything more than that right now. Also Toriel has yet to get a formal divorce and er, she can't even think of him for much of the fic without wanting to set him on fire so... Yeah). Also considering Mad Mewmew/Asgore (because funny but also oddly sweet), and Mettaton trying to get over a crush on Alphys at the start (due to Mettaton's Winter Alarmclock dialogue reframing all of Mettaton's actions in canon in a whole newlight for me), but for the most part romance really isn't a focus.

Things to set it apart from every other 'Frisk grows up in the Underground' fanfic:

A LOT of worldbuilding focus on stuff how monsters get food and materials.

Toriel teaching everyone how Monster society was before the War vs now (aka lots of cultural trauma themes here).

More emphasis on how little Monster society these days really knows about things they really should given their Kingdom's plans.

Sans 'timeline trauma' getting tossed out the window for joining Toriel in 'worried parent' stress (hard to be upset about LOADS when they're specifically stopping a toddler you love from getting murdered).

Papyrus accidentally making everything better just because for the sake of his nibblet he can't back down.

FLOWER SYMBOLISM AND DISCUSSING THE UNDERGROUND'S VERY IMPORTANT PLANT LIFE!

Undyne having a character growth arc triggered by Papyrus.

Mettaton having a character growth arc triggered by Papyrus (and a passing mention of Napstablook).

Alphys not being fired post Amalgamite reveal making her realize she has in fact actually kinda created the cure for death (by 'Falling Down') or at the very least is only maybe three steps away from that and actually works on that alongside a bunch of other stuff with other scientists because working alone sucked.

Lots of focus on the humans who fell before Frisk because their lives mattered! and also the Blue Soul was Kris because damn if I don't feel the need to really hammer in Toriel's trauma caused by Asgore here

NarraChara and Napstablook being ghost buddies =D they suck at it but Chara will take literally anyone who can hear them for company and Napstablook feels bad about that

Snowdin being secretly a hub of human sympathisers! (None of them knew they weren't the only ones).

MONSTER RADIO and ANIME/WESTERNS ON TV!

Tems and the Riverperson mattering while still being true to their very weird selves!!!

Asgore learning that he DOES in fact have a lot of influence and that maybe, juuust maybe, that his screw ups were worse for his Kingdom than he already thought (don't worry Asgore fans, despite my having to write a lot of Asgore grr due to Toriel being a major character, saving him and showing how much he loves his people is a major goal of mine <3). He still f%cked up majorly though XD

Frisk dealing with, well, the stress of growing up in a place that says their death would make everyone (except their immediate loved ones) happy and constantly having to live in hiding/disguise...

Flowey being a murderous little shit but also not having reset power and both Frisk and Chara in his life again.

Undertale Yellow and Deltarune characters! Who probably won't be in focus a lot but they've helped me out a ton for fleshing the out my setting so I will 100% be giving them at least a little screen time to make up for that (like Amalgamate Kanako playing with Frisk, and Martlet and Noelle being VERY interesting in Papyrus's 'Lets not kill the humans' movement for reasons our main characters will eventually learn <3).

Oh and a huge amount of 'Unseen in game' areas I made for the Underground which include:

SnowDen: a 'town' of Dog and Rabbit made tunnels underneath the ENTIRE Snowdin region (connects to every dog sentry post, the 'Toby Fox secret area' and the 'very efficiently laid out' travel tunnels seen in canon Undertale). Generally requires those living there to get through given how winding and confusing the tunnels can get (all guideposts are puzzles made with scent markers...).

TooHot: basically a 'lethal lava land' housing district for fire monsters below general Hotland. Predates the Wat and is too hot for most non fire monsters to go anywhere near (the current name was given by Asgore though).

Cliffstop: a 'thin' vertical crevice monsters in New Home unearthed a while back that goes from from all the way to the very top of Mt Ebott down to the dark of the Abyss below (locals there call the top of the area Clifftop and the lowest safe for travel Cliffdrop). Gets a fair bit of sun and has flying room so it's popular with plant and flying monsters but the cliffs are very unstable so the bottom is covered in rope nets to prevent accidents. Most puzzles about the place are moving rope bridges, loading up vertical conveyer belts with the correct weights and 'light and mirror' puzzles.

Riverfolk Waterway and True Tem Village: settlements hidden deep within Waterfall's 'unreachable in canon' winding waterways. The former is a small inlet where 'Riverfolk' monsters like the Riverperson have a small collection of boathouses they dock at, and the later is exactly what is sounds like, with the 'Temmie Village' we see in canon being merely a Temmie trading outpost. Can accessed only by Riverperson boat or the Temmie's secret tunnels and is home to all sorts of cool things like the Temmie 'Colleg' and 'DEEP HISTORY mUSEEum'~ XD

WebbInn 'the Spider district': Mostly a giant communal spider web hanging Hotland's ceiling but also connected to a tunnel that goes up near Mt Ebbot's peak (the spiders have been digging upwards in hopes of getting a 'sunspot' they can use to advertise their 'sweet little town' to tourists). Has a... Very distinctive culture compared to the rest of the Underground and the 'puzzles' there tend towards being 'social' in nature (aka fey logic games where how you speak and act gets you directed every which way).

Starlite Strip: A little connecting area right underneath the path/cliff Monster Kid and Frisk see the castle while travelling through Waterfall in Undertale Canon. Not a big settlement on its own but something of a trading hub for monsters from New Home and the surrounding areas in Waterfall to buy and sell goods (also has a LOT of Royal Guard presence which is why absolutely no one in Undertale recommends it to the very human Frisk). Very sparkly but in a gentle 'crystals, glowing water and fire flies' kinda way.

And... Yeah. Wanna post a full script of what I've got planned so far but this post is already massive so will do that in a bit.

Will say though that the general ending plan for this fic arguably goes full fix fic with:

12-14 year old Frisk comes out as human publicly and goes through the entire Underground arguing their case (something the Underground has been publicly debating for the last 10 years or so thanks to a very motivated Papyrus and a wanting more ratings + genuinely interested Mettaton).

Undyne attempts to kill them but well, she's only going all out because she and Paps had a deal about this (he vowed that he'd defend any innocent human from her killing them so she could still go all out at her job) and Frisk knows that.

Mettaton gets to do THE biggest and most historically important interview in the Underground's history.

Asgore declares that the Underground will try out this whole 'everyone in the kingdom votes' thing on both the upcoming war and how they will treat humans living here because he wants to make sure he's doing what his people want (Mettaton asks what Asgore will vote but Asgore, finally realizing his own influence, refuses to say).

Asgore and Frisk spend a nice, if slightly nervously time together drinking tea and talking about the future while the votes are being counted. (Toriel and others may join them but mostly this is Asgore getting to know... the last of Toriel's adopted children she told him about the others when she asked for a divorce).

Monsters choose wisely because for all this fic is 'Monsters are flawed too!' they are good people and I want to make that clear <3

Cue Frisk publically trying to help break the barrier while being very alive...

Flowey pulling a 'God of Hyper Death' except well, he, Frisk and Chara maaay have discussed a bit of this beforehand (Flowey did want the souls and this would get him them), so er, the fight might be a touch more mixed with genuine anger and playfulness. Note: Still working out the exacts.

The human SOULs get brought back to life as monsters while Flowey gets a SOUL of his own and Chara gets enough magical matter to be visible to people other than Frisk (it required less waste of the accumulated magic, the soul of an additional human another girl falling into the Ruins was what got Frisk deciding to come out actually, the kids using a bunch of Alphys' furthered research on the interplay between Determination, matter and Dust, and breaking down the dead humans' bodies for enough 'compatible matter' to work with, and the destruction and repurposing of the Barrier but hey! Back to life! Or arguably Chara's case an upgrade to proper ghost-hood). Oh and the Amalgamates that want it are safely separated but not sure if that's a 'before no' thing or a 'here in this big finale' thing~ XD

And yeah. That's all of my 'extra happy ending just because I can' stuff the entire fic eventually builds towards. Will post all my planned scenes/'domino effect planning' some other time but for now I'm done.

If you liked any ideas in this feel free to use them please (I'm a slow ass writer and I write what I want to see more of in the world XD) and er, hope this was a fun ramble to read <3

#fic rambles #fanfiction #fais fanfic rambles #undertale #undertale au #sliceoflife #drama #tw death #I write Toriel like some write Sans (aka she's my fav and I show it by gleefully mashing her trauma buttons =D)#GorseTale #My references to flowers are because flower language and symbolism are fun and I am a nerd (also so is Chara)#Frisk born in the Underground AU #Undertale fallen humans coming back to life as monsters happy end #Asgore upon realizing he's running a dictatorship: D= Also “So what IS 'Vote'? ... Golly that sounds neato! How can I try it?”#Mettaton ego used for the greater good (yes really)#I get bored of Sans having timeline terror all the time so I let him experience Toriel's trauma instead #Papyrus makes everything better #fanmade undertale locations #Undertale yellow and deltarune cameos #There are probably better tags for this but I'm having fun being silly in them XD #Side note: what kind of monsters do you think all the humans in my fic should come back as?#Thinking Kris as a cat monster who can shift dark/light with their mood and Clover as a heraldry Enfield critter but stumped on the rest #btw please use any of the ideas/concepts presented for your own fanworks if you want to. I write/plot what I want to read XD

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thewittyphantom · 2 years ago

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Yugo has dialogue with the Arc-V cast. Here’s what he says to Yuya and Yuto.

Yugo: Hey! I’ve been lookin’ for ya! Yuya: Y...Yugo!? You’re here too! Yugo: Yeah! I ended up in a place that looked like the City before searching for you. Yuya: This is great! This means you were able to escape from my body! Yugo: It feels a little weird...Just until a little while ago, I was you and you were me. But now we’re talking face-to-face. Yuya: Haha...You’re right about that. Yugo: Has our split affected you in any way? Yuya: Hmm...I don’t think so. Yugo: That’s good. I was worried you’d get sick cuz I’m not giving you my strength anymore. But if I’m no longer a part of you...That must mean you’re a weaker Duelist. Yuya: Huh!? That’s not true! Yugo: Wanna test? It’s not every day you get to Duel an ol’ part of yourself! Yuya: Okay - sure. But I’m telling you, I’m not weaker!

Yugo: Ah! Here you are! Yuto: You... Yugo: Me and you haven’t always seen eye-to-eye, but we now know everything about each other. I learned we have a lot in common. We’re both trying to save someone we care for. I’m sorry I put you through all that mess. Yuto: It’s fine. I didn’t make your life easy either. Yugo: Speaking of...How long have you and Lulu been dating? Yuto: D-Dating? It’s not like that. Yugo: Stop blushing! Remember - i know everything! Yuto: Then you don’t need to ask those types of questions! Yugo: C’mon, fess up! Me and Rin have been together since we were kids, so we’ve known each other forever. So I don’t know what it’s like to run into the girl of your dreams on one magical day! I don’t get to ask questions like this often, so c‘mon! Share! Yuto: ...Fine. I will share...my knowledge of manners! Yugo: Huh? What do you mean!? Yuto: You say whatever comes to your mind - no matter how rude it is! Yugo: Hmm...Rin used to same the same thing to me. “Think before you speak.” Yuto: She’s right! You’re like a barbarian! Yugo: Zuzu said I have bad manners too...how could they both be wrong? Yuto: You must pay for your indiscretion! Yugo: What? Don’t be like that. Yuto: Since your etiquette is heading astray, I will lead it back on the right path!

#yu gi oh #duel links #yu gi oh arc v #yugo #yuya sakaki #yuto #rin #lulu obsidian #zuzu boyle

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sevengraces · 1 year ago

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someday I'm gonna be somebody people want

ch1, You, Title Card

AO3 Link

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Hello and back again, I have the patience of a toddler when I'm invested so here we go besties. I could not bear to leave you on that cliff hanger for long so y'know you're welcome ig. Warnings are the same as the previous chapter so y'know feel free to go back and reread 'em lol. This chapter title is also from Dodie "All My Daughters" figured I should keep with a theme of some sort. Blanket notice for all my works btw, if the dialogue seems weird or off kilter it's because I am both of those things and have yet to figure out a single social interaction. If it's real bad you can just believe that they're both autistic, cause I am and that's why they're written like that lol. (I do feel in my heart of hearts that Tim Drake is autistic, but that's prolly cause he's my lad for projection so what can ya do. I didn't tag him as autistic in this fic b/c I didn't intentionally write him that way but again (!) I am autistic so there is a nonzero chance all my characters come across like that) c'est la vie tho so enjoy

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Chapter 2- Everyone but me knows how to let go

Tim sat up so fast he had to brace himself against the couch so that he didn’t face plant into a puddle of regurgitated coffee. Once he steadied himself he realized he had no idea where to go from here.

“What’s happening kid? I sent you a message but you didn’t even read it, and I knocked for like ten minutes once I got here.” Jason asked, closing the door behind himself and glancing around the empty penthouse.

The younger boy took a deep breath and opened his mouth to speak, when Jason evidently spotted the vomit. “What the fuck? D’ya have a concussion? Did you even go out last night? Don’t you know better than to try and do your concussion watch by yourself?” He shot out rapid-fire.

Tim stood shakily and rolled his eyes, heading into the kitchen and pulling out a towel and cleaner from the cabinet under the sink. “I don’t have a concussion, no I didn’t go out last night, and obviously I know you can’t concussion-watch yourself Jason- despite what you might think, I’m not an idiot.”

Jason blocked his way towards the mess and looked him up and down.

Tim was shaking and pale. His lips were chapped and he had deep bags under his eyes, which were only broken up by the puffy red rings that displayed a decent representative of how long he’d cried for. His face was coated in those tacky tears and his hair looked like he’d been pulling on it for a long time. The boy was staring determinedly at the window behind Jason and he had the towel and spray bottle clutched so hard his knuckles had gone white.

The man softened a little, “You get yourself sick?”

Of course, Tim just stepped around the man and bared his teeth in a bitter facsimile of a smile. “Not in anyway that matters Todd.” He crouched down and held his breath as he cleaned up the vomit, spraying the floor and scrubbing some more with a second towel.

“What’s that supposed to mean Timbo? You’re either sick or not kid.” Jason sent another, sharper, glance around the apartment. His vision stuttered over the shattered mug, it was red and had writing on it at some point, but it was illegible now.

“No, I’m not sick Jason. Did you need something- I’m sorry to have ignored you I was a little preoccupied.” Tim steadfastly ignored any tension in the room and walked back to the kitchen. He deposited the spray bottle under the counter once more and dumped the used towels in a hall hamper. Then he opened a nearby door revealing a closet full of blankets and larger cleaning supplies. He pulled out a broom and dustpan then turned back towards the shattered coffee mug.

Once more the man stepped into the younger’s path. “Sure seems like it kiddo- listen is everything alright?”

Tim tensed even further then sighed loud and long. “Listen to me Jason, we don’t have to do this okay? You’re gonna ask what’s wrong with me, I’m going to avoid the question- then we’ll do that until you’ve felt like you did your due diligence. After that you’ll accept what I said the first time and ask for whatever favor you came here for.” The boy glared up at Jason and gestured that he should move, he did not. “It doesn’t matter and I promise, I’m not going to go whine to Dick or Bruce that you ignored my duress or something- hell if they ask I’ll lie and tell them we had a real heart to heart and fleshed out our entire sordid, bloody history to a nice storybook resolution.”

Jason took a step back and grabbed the boy by the shoulders carefully, “So you’re under duress then?”

He yanked himself backwards and let out a wordless shriek, before muttering to himself as he pushed around the older man and began to sweep. “Fuck why not, of course this is gonna happen- goddamnit, it might as well.”

Jason watched him warily, like someone watches a loose lion or a person a little too close to the edge of a building. “Look Pre- Tim, I’m obviously not someone you wanna be talkin’ to- and no one gets that more than me! But I can’t leave you alone like this, is there someone I can call? Dickiebird? Maybe Blondie? Hell, I’ll get the clone on the line if it’ll help ya, just tell me what I can do ta’ help right now, okay?”

Tim laughed bitterly, leaning down to pick up the dustpan then walking and dumping it in the trash. He dropped both items on the floor in the kitchen before storming into the living room and gesturing towards the leather chair across from the couch that he collapsed on in a pile of disjointed limbs. “Whatever Jason, you’re already here and this can’t get much worse honestly- so y’know take a seat! You need a drink or anything, or can I lay here and stare at the ceiling as I rerun my top ten worst mistakes and do the math to figure out how all of that ended up with us here in my shitty apartment on a fucking Saturday morning?”

The man in question edged around the kitchen counter and tentatively sat on the leather chair, “What’s up then? You said you didn’ go out last night, right?”

Tim muttered angrily, “I’m never going to live this down fuck- should just send a fucking group email and get it over with,” before rolling his head to stare at Jason, who had his boots toed off onto the ground next to the chair and a leg propped up on the coffee table between them.

Jason sat and waited through the grumbling, maintaining a faintly concerned expression the entire time.

“You really want to do this?” Tim finally sighed like it had been forced out of him.

The other merely shrugged and leaned back into the chair, “What else would I be doin’ huh?”

“Anything?” The boy laughed out before rolling his eyes and taking in a deep breath. “Fine, I’d tell you not to laugh but it isn’t like it matters, so here goes nothing I guess.”

Tim stared up at the ceiling and ignored how tense his entire body was, he stared up at the ceiling and ignored how obvious that tension probably was to Jason. “I’m lonely.”

The boy liked to imagine the silence hung like a gunshot in the air, but it didn’t- he knew what those sounded like.

“You’re lonely.” Jason repeated with no intonation whatsoever.

Tim shrugged and resolutely stared at the ceiling some more, “Yup, go ahead then let's get this over with sooner rather than later.”

Jason frowned and dropped his leg from the table, leaning forward; “Get what over with kid? D’ya want a hug? No offense but that didn’t seem like something you were interested in earlier.”

He sat up on the couch, “Jason don’t be an idiot,” he gestured widely with his hands between the two of them, “the laughter, the jokes, the- I don’t know Todd, texting everyone we both know and a few people we don’t for good measure! Whatever it is you’re gonna do with this!”

Jason stared for a long moment, “Listen- I know I’ve been an ass, especially to you, but this isn’t funny. You fuckin’ threw up because of it, you’ve obviously been crying, none of that is funny Tim.” The older boy pinched the bridge of his nose, “Why didn’t you call someone- actually how do you get so lonely you puke? Is this something Bruce knows about?

Tim gaped for a long moment before letting out a sharp, angry sounding laugh. “This isn’t funny? That’s the line for you Todd? If I actually cry about it then it isn’t funny anymore, shit if I’d known it was this easy to get you to act like a person around me I’d’ve dealt with this ages ago!”

The older boy flinched back like he’d been hit, “Tim I-“

He was interrupted, “No don’t act like you give a shit Jason! Not even twenty fucking minutes ago you were calling me Pretender, this is the most you’ve said my actual goddamn name in the entire time we’ve known each other. You asked asshole, I told you- knowing full well the consequences.” He breathed heavily for a minute before continuing slightly softer, “I get that you don’t give a shit about me, not in any way that matters. I know you think I’m a naive idiot Jason, but don’t pretend you want to know for any reason other than having a leg up on this weird one-sided pissing match- remember I’m the Pretender, only one of us steals titles.”

Jason curled in on himself, breathing deeply before staring off to the left of the boy across from him. “Alright, I think I fucked this up- um Tim listen I sorta thought you’d just know since I guess there hadn’t been any fights to the death for awhile and we uh- coexisted when necessary.” He shored his shoulders and turned to look the younger in the eyes, “I don’t hate you, okay? You’re not stupid or naive, I uh- I thought we were uh bein’ friendly- which yeah I shoulda known better it’s not like I ever actually apologized ta’ you. Fuck.”

Tim blinked, standing up and backing towards the window side of the living room. “Jason Peter Todd this is not funny, you- you got your fucking blackmail I- what the fuck do you want from me? Fuck off, did Dick tell you? Was it Bruce? Surely you’ve got better things to do with your time?” His voice broke halfway through, “Who thought this was a funny fucking joke?”

Jason went pale, “Shit- no kid this isn’t a fucking joke! I- who would? Why would that be fucking funny? Holy shit kid,” the man stood up just as quickly, shooting forward and pulling Tim into a hug. “Shit, I’m sorry- I don’t, I don’ know what to do here kid, please.”

Tim bit back a sob, tensing his whole body away from the hug. He desperately forced out; “If this is a joke I need you to leave right now- please Jason, you win okay? G-good one alright? You can go and uh, and tell ev- everyone how I fell for it al- alright?”

He leaned back, holding the boy steady in his arms. “Tim, Tim I’m not kiddin’ please- I just, whaddya need ta’ know I’m serious?” Jason begged frantically, “D’ya want an apology? Cause I’m sorry kid, I’m so fucking sorry for all of it alright? You didn’t deserve a goddamn bit of it and it never shoulda happened, not at all and not to you.”

Tim shook in his hold, just barely whispering “You don’t mean that, Jason you don’t mean that okay? I was- I was a shitty replacement an- and a useless Robin that was- wasn’t even a decent placeholder for the next one okay? Do- don’t say shit like that to me Jason, if it was ever funny it definitely isn’t now, okay? I don’t know what you want me t- to say!” He whined out anxiously.

If possible, Jasons’ face crumpled further. “No kid, I don’t- I’m not makin’ fun of ya. Don’t say shit like that Tim, you were a great Robin an’ I was lucky ta’ have you as a successor, okay?”

The boy collapsed, leaning fully against Jason as his sobs returned with a vengeance and his breathing rocketed up in speed.

Jason pulled the boy into his arms and lowered them both onto the floor, “Shit uhm- shh, you’re okay Tim- deep breathes C’mon. It’ll be okay, c’mere kid I’ve got ya.”

Tim whined and leaned into the hold so hard his head ached, and Jason began to run a hand through his hair. “You’ll be okay, s’all fine. I know Tim, I know- it’s a lot right now. Just breathe with me c’mon in and out you’ve got it.”

Tim struggled and shook and cried for a long time, he tried to pull back from the older man but Jason just kept holding him and talking through the panic.

Eventually he began to follow Jason’s voice, managing a choked inhale through his sobs every now and then until slowly, painfully, the panic began to ease.

Jason just continued to mutter reassurances like it was nothing, “There you go, there he is, you’re doing so good. Here we are, you’re right here with me and nobodies gonna hurt you, I’ve got ya kid- just take it easy.”

Tim slowly stiffened as he came back into himself. He was curled up in Jasons lap, with his head shoved under the older mans’ chin and his face buried in his neck. His hands were gripping the back of Jasons’ jacket like he belonged there and there were half dried tears all over the both of them. Jason had his arm wrapped around him and his other hand was running though his hair. Casually, he pressed a kiss onto the top of Tims’ hair, still speaking softly throughout it all.

He forced his hands free and yanked himself out of the elder's arms, nearly falling backwards, except Jason caught him easily. “Hey, hey you’re okay Tim- it's fine I’ll let you up just be careful.”

Tim scrambled backwards until he was pressed against the window like he’d been sitting earlier this morning. He scrubbed a hand up and down his face, refusing to look at the older man he’d just been crying on for who knows how long.

Jason let him, hands held up in acquiesce. “D’ya need a drink? Some food?”

Tim kept his hands in place and firmly did not look at Jason. Reluctantly he muttered, “Water’s fine, there are bottles in the pantry.”

He stood slowly then turned around and headed towards the kitchen. Jason opened the pantry door next to the fridge and pulled out two bottles of water. He gave the younger a moment to collect himself before heading back into the living room and dropping to the floor across from him.

“Here, drink the first one slowly.”

Tim didn’t look up but he took the bottle and cracked the seal. He took small sips in silence for a heavy few moments before finally glancing through his bangs at the other boy.

Jason was sitting on the ground with his legs sprawled out in front of him, he had a second water bottle on his left and was leaned back on his right hand. He wasn’t watching Tim drink head on, instead staring out the window behind the boy with only the occasional glance to check his progress through the water. Stretched out across Tims’ floor, Jason looked so much like Robin that it hurt to breathe.

Eventually Tim finished the first water bottle, and Jason handed him the second without hesitation. “Drink as fast as ya like, just finish it.”

And so he did, he drank in silence for a few more minutes and pretended that he had any idea what was going to happen next.

After he got a solid amount of water in him, Jason cleared his throat.

Tim tensed in a way that was unfortunately quite visible to Bats, but Jason soldiered on anyways. “Listen, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have sprung that on you when it was clear somethin’ was up, and I’m sorry for everything I’ve ever done that’d make you think I’d make such a shitty joke. I get it if you don’t believe me or want ta’ see me again, I just- Tim you’ve gotta know that right now I’m serious, yeah?”

He shuddered, and Tim winced. “I- fuck Jason you don’t need to- m’sorry.” He exhaled sharply, “None of this was your problem and I didn’t mean to make such a scene but you know me. I uh- I overreacted okay? That’s not your fault. You uh- you just caught me at a bad time and had to deal with my fits, but its no big deal okay?” Tim chewed his lip and shoved his face into his knees muttering to himself; “Fuck this is embarrassing.”

The older of the two flinched like he’d been shot this time, “Tim can you look at me a minute?”

The boy reluctantly looked up and Jason let out a wobbly smile before continuing, “Ya don’t need ta’ be embarrassed okay kid? You had a panic attack, probably two judging by the vomit from earlier- and that shit just happens sometimes okay? Especially in our line of work.”

Tim shook his head and smiled tightly, “Not really Jason, I’ve kinda always been like this. But thank you anyways.”

“Tim, listen to me okay? Just to the words I’m saying.” Jason responded through grit teeth, “That shit happens sometimes and it isn’t your fault. You got that? People have panic attacks, especially kids in high stress situations 24/7 so this isn’t some sparing your feelings bullshit- when have you even known me to do that anyways?”

The younger laughed ruefully, “Apparently right after I have a breakdown in your lap.”

Jason snorted but shook his head, “I’m bein’ dead serious Tim okay? And-“ he hesitated but powered through, “I’m bein’ serious when I tell you I’m sorry.”

Tims' face went red and he looked off to the side, “Yeah alright Jason, I get it. I’m sorry I had a fucking episode all over you about it or whatever.”

Jason raised an eyebrow, “I’m not sure you do get it kid, but I can explain.” He bit the inside of his cheek and started, “I’m sorry I attacked you- each time Tim. You didn’t deserve any o’ that and I shoulda known better. I said and did a lot of shit to you, and I blamed you for a lot of shit that wasn’t your fault. I was running high and fast on the Pit, and I’m not sayin’ that as an excuse cause it isn’t one. I’m telling you that so you know I was dead fuckin’ wrong when I said that shit to you.”

He continued, “You’re not a pretender or a replacement or a fuckin’ placeholder. You were a damn good Robin and I meant it when I told you I was lucky to have you as a successor. I mean shit kid, even beat seven ways to hell on the Pit I still wanted you as my Robin.”

Tim hesitated and glared at the floor near his feet. “You- you don’t have to say all this Jason. I know you don’t want to kill me and I get that in your right mind you wouldn’t’ve attacked me. But-“ he trailed off before looking up helplessly and whispering, “you don’t like me Jason.”

He grimaced, “To be honest Tim, I don’t really know you. The only things I know about you are what Talia told me and what I’ve heard from everyone else in this shitty family.” Jason smiled crookedly, “But from what everyone who’s actually met you says about you? I’d be stupid not to like you kid.”

Tim curled up and grit his teeth, “I know that isn’t true, I mean c’mon man- who the fuck are you talking to? I don’t know if you know this Jason,” he began bitterly, “but I’m an asshole. I’m a petty, manipulative, cold-hearted little shit and the only reason Bruce has kept me on retainer at this point is because I’d be too hard to beat as a rogue.”

Jason blinked for a moment “Kid, how’d you become Robin? Why’d ya’ do it?”

The boy in question hesitated over the non-sequitur. “… I blackmailed B with proof of his identity and stole the suit?”

“Okay, and why’d you even do it? What was the point? If you’d known for years why then?”

“Jason what are you going on about? You know why, because I had to!” Tim snapped bitterly.

Jason snorts through his nose, “No you didn’t, Tim you didn’t have to do shit- you coulda gone on your merry way with your parents and your pictures.”

He glares belligerently, “No I couldn’t’ve! Bruce was going insane, he woulda killed somebody or himself- whichever came first.” Tim sighs, losing steam. “I had to because he would’ve proven the Joker right, he would’ve destroyed your legacy until it was nothing more than the last straw that ruined Batman.”

He smiles sadly and shrugs, “But why did that matter to you kid? Why not make it someone else’s problem?”

Tim sighs loudly and knocks his head against the glass behind him. “It mattered to me because my pictures of Batman and Robin were all I had- is that what you want to hear? That I forced my way in, not for any noble reason like /Batman needs a Robin/, but because I was a clingy kid who didn’t want to see his happiest memories ruined like everything else.”

“You’re selling yourself short with that summary kiddo,” Jason leaned forward braced on his legs, “I think the reason you took up the R was because you believed in what we stood for and you didn’t want it ruined for good. I think you knew that your pictures got you as far as they could and Robin got sad kids farther than they thought they’d ever make it, and that shouldn’t be taken away from them just because shitty people exist.”

The younger boy stared at his feet sullenly, “Who cares Jason? I was a lonely, naive kid sticking my nose in a grieving fathers’ business because I never learned boundaries- does it matter why I did it?”

Jason let out a sudden laugh, “Of course it matters Tim! You’re the only one of us who took up Robin because you thought other people needed you to do it. Dickie wanted his parents murderer gone and was willing to keep on doing that for others only after he got justice, I wanted to feel helpful and important even though I had shitty parents and a shitty past and then I decided I needed to prove what kids like me could do, Steph wanted it so she could prove to herself that she was more than what B an’ everyone else told her, hell even the brat wanted the R just ‘cause o’ blood ties and he’s only just now starting to do it to help people.” Jason ran a hand through his hair, “Kid you looked at a hero from legend who was goin’ off the deep end publicly and decided that it couldn’t go any further- and then you made it happen even when it was fucking terrible. You don’t do that shit because you’re a fucking optimist- you do it ‘cause you know what’s right and you aren’t willing to let shit slide.”

Tim opened and closed his mouth silently, staring at his predecessor with wide, glassy eyes. Eventually he mumbled out, “That sounds a lil’ different than cuckoo bird.”

He sighs sadly, letting his head hang. “Yeah, yeah it does kid. I was fucking wrong, okay? I was angry and scared, an’ I didn’t wanna admit that life went on without me just ‘cause that’s how life works. I saw this determined little wisp of a thing that looked at every fracture line my greek tragedy left and decided to do damage control and it scared me.”

“I didn’t ever wanna replace you, I wasn’t even s’possed to stay Robin forever- I was gonna give it to the next kid once Bruce found someone better or he got a little better” Tim forced out slowly, like he was tasting the words. “I guess Bruce or Dick didn’t tell you, huh?”

Jason cocked his head at the boy, “What’re you- oh. Kid I don’t know what they coulda told me that would make lying about an apology funny.”

He shrugged and mumbled something too quiet to be heard.

Jason stared at the boy, watching as his face slowly went red and his shoulders hunched. He forced out “Didn’t catch that kiddo” through some uncomfortable mixture of bemusement and trepidation.

Tim squared his shoulders but stared at his feet. “I took pictures of everyone, obviously. I started ‘round the end of Dicks’ run- got all the greatest hits of Batgirl and Boy Wonder, caught a few good shots of Batman figuring out he had a child that he’d die for in real time- but uh, well.” He hesitated but pushed through like a man to the gallows, “Well I’ve got the most shots of you. All my best work, all my favorites, just most of my pictures- were you.”

The older boy nodded slowly, “Sure, I mean you musta’ been tiny when Dickiebird started out. It only makes sense that you’d get better as you got older so it woulda been odd if they weren’t Tim- what’s that got to do with anything?”

He shook his head, “No- I mean yeah I was like nine when I started with Dicks’ Robin, and I followed you from like ten to twelve but that’s not what I mean.” Tim shuddered and mumbled to himself, “I can’t believe you’re making me say it out loud, oh god.” He took a deep breath and finally looked at Jason. “I went out maybe once every two weeks with Dick, not because I couldn’t do it more, just ‘cause. When you started on Robin though? I started going out every other night. I mean fuck Jay, I used to only go out when there was nobody to notice I was gone and I was really careful about covering my tracks and doing well in school and shit- but when you started? I even went out the few times when my parents were home, I was so excited just to see you out there doing good.”

Jason let out a low wounded sound, “Tim…”

“Jason, your Robin was why any of that shit mattered to me. Of course I cared before, but not like when it was you.” Tim laughed self-consciously and ducked his head “I hacked my school records, convinced my parents I should go to school in town, I mean- Jason I thought of you as my Robin. I think I have an encoded notebook that I used when I was like eleven where I write, verbatim, /my Robin is the best hero in the world, Batman sure is lucky to have him/, so yeah you can see how hearing that you actually thought we could be friends might seem like a cruel joke.”

He blinked tears back rapidly, rocking forward onto his knees to stop right in front of Tim, “Can I- baby bird can I hug you?”

“You want to?” Tim asked in a quiet voice.

“Yes, absolutely”

And the boy barely got a chance to nod before Jason had him yanked forward against him, arms clasped so tightly around him that Tim could feel his bones creak. Jason held him desperately with his face hidden in the younger mans’ hair and his whole body folded over him. “I’m sorry Tim, fuck- you were a good kid and a great Robin alright?”

Tim pressed his face into the mans’ shirt and took deep breaths. Ever so slowly he relaxed into the hold until eventually; he didn’t notice the awkward angle, or the way his sweatpants were bunched around his legs because of how he’d been yanked, or even how his tears were leaking into the shirt below him. Tim pressed his face into Jason and gripped the man equally as hard.

They sat like that for a long time, Jason held Tim until their legs were numb and the floor was uncomfortable. At which point the older boy just barely loosened his hold, politely ignoring how Tim only burrowed further, and leaned backwards. He pulled the boy with him, until Jason was sitting in the middle of the floor with Tim tugged into his lap and his arms encircling the boy with only slightly less desperation.

Tim croaked out cautiously from his place within the hold but didn’t look up, “Hey Jason?”

“Hmm?”

“If I’d’ve called you today, and asked if we could just uh- just talk, would you have come?”

Jason pressed a kiss to the top of his head, “Yeah baby bird, I think I woulda.”

And from the safety of his Robins’ hold Tim let loose a wobbly, genuine smile.

#fanfic #dc universe #Tim drake #Jason todd #batman #red robin #hurt/comfort #mentioned batfamily #grace is writing

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