#i think some of them only got added to the game in different colour schemes bc i couldnt get them to fit the vibes properly

[cerberus-writes]

full res version of carnificare's graphics. open them in a new tab for ✨texture✨

the original portraits of serafim and selwyn aside, i think i gave myself about.... 40-60 minutes each for the rest of them? honestly, if i had more time/energy i'd love to do a more art-intensive game now that i've apparently gotten past the mental block of using my own art for anything. time will tell!

i've also realised that i have... maybe something like 1k worth of miscellaneous footnotes / lore explanations / dev notes that i had in the drafting docs for this. might throw some of that into a post one of these days for the sake of appeasing the brainworms -- once i figure out a mobile-friendly release of the game, ofc

[virginreprise]

J U N K Y ' P R I D E

joel miller x reader

" I KNOW I CAUGHT YOU AT A NOT SO HAPPY TIME OF YOUR LIFE " ✧ ⁺ ⁺ 　°

CHAPTER TWO

WARNINGS: age difference (big one), pervy joel, trailer park joel, joel miller has a vintage porn collection, joel's a sad old man, video game joel was in mind when writing, joel is six foot because i say so, multi-part, smut in the next chapter because i can't write anything if it isn't slowburn

WORD COUNT: 7.7k

CHAPTER TWO

AO3LINK

CHAPTER ONE—BAD DISEASE

Static from the television set tucked in a corner, a beaten leather armchair parked in front of it and a stack of vintage, VHS porn tapes on the unit. One half of “Agent 69” stuck in the VCR, balancing on its side due to the lack of care from its owner who’d jacked off in the very chair that towered over it—cum stained fist and a name on his lips, slipped out between plush flesh. Hand frantic, jerking in tandem with the buck of his hips as he flit his eyes between the TV and the wood-panelled ceiling, profanities spilling from his filthy mouth. Muttering to himself as pornstar moans graced his ears, words whispered into the night, stolen by the archangels and flown up to God: conspiring, scheming, uttering under their breath that he should not be allowed through the holy gates on judgement day. That the defiled Bible on his bookshelf and the cross that had been left for him by the previous owners, pinned to the trailer wall, was not enough for them to ignore the strained sentences that he spewed in a desperate bid for the Trailer Park Princess on her knees—red nails and red lips wrapped around his cock. A ring of colour staining the base. 

Utter filth. And Joel knew it. 

The perversions he didn’t keep to himself, laughed about bending over the pretty thing next door whilst nursing a beer on Pete’s porch—puffing away on the cheap cigars he’d stolen from the liquor store. They tasted like shit, smelt like shit and Joel would’ve been better without it, but it added to the image: kept Susan from asking him stupid questions like why he didn’t have a woman. It was her way of flirting, bikini top displaying her sagging tits, bending over the kitchen counter whilst his buddies watched baseball. 

“You got your eye on anyone, Joel?” 

“Not really, Susan.” 

Then Pete interjecting. 

“Come off it, Susan. Just cause he ain’t committed don’t mean that he ain’t got women.”

That kept her quiet, made her slink away into the hallway, slipping into their bedroom and pulling a cover-up on—suddenly insecure. 

Joel wasn’t a pervert. He didn’t have some strange penchant for young women. They were just…nice to look at. Pretty and sun-kissed in the Texan heat, ass hanging out their shorts, bikini top doing much more to entice than Susan’s did. There was no harm in looking—they never knew. He prided himself on being discreet, nursing a beer in the late afternoon whilst Kenny Rogers lulled from the radio, flicking ash from his cigarette onto the porch floor—eyes trained on your open window, cracked just a tad to let the air through. Drapes open. 

At times, he thinks you do it on purpose, a gentle taunt, a silent jeer: “You can only look, perv.” 

If the invitation was there, he’d take you up on it. Because out of all the women he’d fucked, headboard bashing against the wall, a chip in the wood of the trailer evidence of his trysts, you were the only one who’d worked him up to the point of no return. The only one who’d grabbed him completely by the collar and forced him to lick your boots. 

Like Joel said, he wasn’t a pervert. You were just a fucking whore who needed to be put in her place. 

So he’d sit there, in the white garden chair he’d snatched up from the pile of scrap that accumulated just east of his trailer, and watch. Most days, you’d be doing nothing in particular, unfortunately already dressed, dirty clothes in hand and wet hair dripping down your back. Other days, the days where Joel thought he was really lucky, where he’d stumble inside with a hard-on, sit on his recliner and hastily shove whatever he got his hands on, into the VCR, skipping over the poorly acted introductions, and pretend that the moans reverberating the trailer, were yours. Images of you slipping your shorts over your hips, swaying slightly to whatever tune you were listening to, peeling your shirt off your body. No bra. Slyly stepping towards your window, catching his eye once, a look so slight that he wouldn’t be surprised if he imagined it, and pulled your drapes shut. 

He’d spilt all over his hand, white on his knuckles and a smile on his lips. 

Joel would never feel guilty for wanting you, not when he had already made peace with the fact he was a deadbeat, bound to the white trash lifestyle, unemployed and living off the pills he paid for and sold for a ridiculously high price, still grieving his losses and wondering what the fuck he could’ve done differently. If he would’ve done anything differently given the chance. 

No, Joel was not a bad person. He just looked for her in every person, desperately seeking a will. And so far, you had succeeded in helping him remove the gun from his mouth—evenings spent in different, dangerous ways. 

Texan summers were unlike anything you’d experienced before, the heat so incredibly stifling that your love for the sun disappeared completely. Mornings spent on the porch, soaking in the last bits of breeze before cycling your ass to work, sweating and heaving by the time you got there, in the same condition when you rode back home and locked yourself away with every window flung open before nightfall fell and you felt you could breathe again. 

The cicadas were loud, the snakes huddled up in the shade, waiting for you to trample on them, and the beast next door, Joel Miller: terrifying, gorgeous and a fucking pervert. 

The day you’d moved into the trailer, despairing the loss of stability, ruminating upon your desperate escape from a home now dead and lost to the prairies of your mind, he’d been there. Wifebeater stretched across his wide torso, a cigarette placed on his lips, unused as it hung there, smoking away, the grey wisps begging with each dissipation into the atmosphere: breathe me in. He’d stared. Unable to be subtle no matter how slick he thinks he is, eyes flitting between your tits and your ass. Tits. Ass. Tits. Ass. A calculated dance that left a funny feeling brewing in the pit of your stomach, a lurch in your bowels that made nausea claw its way up your throat. 

Tits. Ass. Then, he suddenly looked at your face, standing there on his porch, the sunrise building its way up the horizon, too early for anybody to see him looking you over like you were a dead deer he’d just shot, smirking at the notion of sawing your head off and displaying it on the wall above his mantle. Heaving boxes into the empty trailer, lot number seventeen, whilst the owner of lot eighteen wouldn’t take his fucking eyes off you, was a terrible feat. 

Once you’d shoved the last box into your bedroom, you’d shut the door, locked it tight and peeked through the window to see that he had gone back inside, retreating to the haven of steel and veneer. 

Over time, Joel became easier to manage. After the initial, awkward introductions where he’d called you princess, babydoll, sugar (almost adding a “tits” to the end of the nickname before realising where he was) your stomach reeling at the monikers, time settled your unmistakable disgust for him, the universe replaced the sickness you felt when you spoke to him with another stomach-turning anxiety that you pushed down far into every crevasse and high onto every mountain. 

You grew to enjoy the nicknames, skipping a few paces up his porch steps and ask him ever so kindly if he could come and fix the cupboard door that was swinging off its hinges, change the lightbulb because you couldn’t reach the ceiling yourself, stop the leaky tap that seemed to start drip drip dripping every month—just to bully you. 

Although you knew that Joel was a dirtbag, hearing him talking about the filthiest things, laughing as Pete clapped him on the back in praise and acknowledgement, knowing that he wanted nothing more than to treat you like a whore, he gave you nothing except a sly smile, a sleazy nickname and the occasional help around the house. Fixing things. 

So, naturally, you began asking around about Joel. Susan liked to gossip. So did Lillian, a woman who had spent her entire life in the park and, at sixty-two, had no interest in leaving. 

“I remember when he moved here,” she’d told you one fine summer evening, when the heat wasn’t as menacing and you felt content being away from the air conditioning, sipping sweet tea in Lillian’s wooden garden chairs, feet placed on the seat—chin resting on your knees. “All stoic, wouldn’t speak ‘ta anyone. I could tell he’d gone through something bad, you know me and my sixth sense.” 

She’d paused for a moment, taking a drag, a sip, a sigh before looking at you solemnly. 

“He was a catch with the ladies,” she’d muttered. “They were all after him, even this one over here,” she’d pointed to Susan who’d smacked her arm, complaining about her disrespect. She was a married, loyal woman after all. “Well, it’s true. If I were twenty years younger, I would’ve gone for him too, but it wouldn’t have done much anyway cause he didn’t touch anyone. There ain’t many pretty young ladies round here, you know you’re the only one,” she’d said plainly, addressing you with a hint of affection. 

Waving her cigarette around as she relayed every single detail she knew about Joel’s love life, telling you how after a few years of moping, he’d bring back girls in the middle of the night, fuck them, and then throw them out the next day. 

“He’s not a romantic,” Lillian had prefaced, Susan interjecting with:

“Ya think so? I think he is…if he just found the right woman-”

“Oh don’t listen to her Darlin’, he’s a man who likes to play. He ain’t lookin’ to settle, I tell you that much.” 

Listening to them both, their anecdotes, their stories, and their opinions, you concluded one thing about Joel Miller. He was an asshole. A man who had done nothing to better his life since he stepped foot in the trailer park ten years ago, a sag in his shoulders and an anger in his eyes. 

You weren’t sure if he’d mellowed since then, or if he’d just managed to conceal it better. Joel hadn’t been angry around you, not when you knocked on his door at three in the morning, asking him if he could come get the spider out of your bedroom, not when you’d accidentally run into his truck with your bike or told him that he was an asshole when you’d caught him talking about you one day in springtime. 

“She’s as dumb as fucking rocks,” he’d chuckled. “Bet she gets cockdrunk so easy.” 

He’d grumbled out the last sentence, an afterthought that was more for him than the men he was talking to, but you, stumbling around, half-asleep after your shift, were not willing to take the degradation. You’d berated him in front of his peers, slammed the door behind you, and regretted it immediately. Because, even though it shouldn’t matter, even though you thought he was pervy and angry and wouldn’t treat you how you’d been told you deserved, the last thing you wanted was for him to hate you. 

Every time he praised you, told you that you looked good as you stepped out of your home, on your way to Lillian’s for a catch-up and the cigarettes she bought you every three weeks, just for being good and keeping her company, you felt that tingle, the synaptic transmissions running down your spine every time he stepped through your door, asking what the issue with your tap was. You should’ve been disgusted when he’d left and you’d gone to the bathroom only to find the panties you’d left on the floor were gone, but you’d felt that same spark instead. A deep, sliding ache that consumed every part of you. 

Luckily for you, your sink decided to start leaking again on a gorgeous Sunday afternoon. Perfect time to lure him into your trailer, grab him by the neck and ask him as nicely as you could if he could cease the pain. 

Sip of beer, drag of cigarette, click of the remote to change the channel, repeat. 

A usual Sunday afternoon pastime. 

Joel would’ve rifled through his VHS’s, find something he could jack off to whilst he deliberated whether today would be the day he’d say “fuck it” and saunter on over to next door, hoping to god he’d get his dick wet by someone other than a whore, but he couldn’t be bothered to move from his seat. It was effort enough trying to change the channel, arm aching as he pressed the button, rolling his eyes as the same boring drab illuminated his TV screen. 

It was another one of those days. Glancing at the watch on his wrist, the broken glass, the notion that he would never fix it no matter how easy it would’ve been to go over to Shane’s and ask him to get it working again, all for the low price of a few pills. 

She’d left him with it and he would die with it. 

A reminder of her every time he glanced at his watch, swallowing hard as he remembered the way he’d pressed cool metal to the side of his head, a tear slipping down his cheek before realising that he never could. Because Joel was an asshole, he knew that. He was selfish and cruel and spoke about people as if they could get any lower than he already was. But more so than anything, Joel was a sad old man.

Tommy, the damn bastard, who’d left Joel to fend for himself while he went off with his new-found “true love” to have kids and a decent life, had sent a few thousand dollars and a pitiful “I’m sorry, Joel,” over the phone after his big brother had fucked up and lost his job. When Joel had been left penniless and broken. Nothing to fight for. No one to hold him or tell him that he was loved. He’d spent all his money raiding gas stations for cases of beer, bottles of whisky, anything that could numb the pain—choosing the alcohol over food, over his mortgage. When he’d lost the house, he hadn’t taken anything of hers. Even after she’d died, he’d insisted that everything needed getting rid of. Her clothes, her posters, even her damn phone. He’d slammed Tommy against the wall after realising that he was taking everything with him, that he was not doing as he was told. After that, Joel had closed the door on her bedroom and never stepped foot in it again. 

All he had of her was a damn watch, a photo that his little brother had shoved into his hands, a harsh, “Take it, you damn bastard. You’ll regret it when you stop feeling so sorry for yourself,” on his lips, and the memory of her in his arms when he’d felt that huge heart of hers stop beating. 

There had been many low points in Joel’s life, wandering through his existence on a tightrope that was ready to snap with every step, but none had been lower than that. 

Not even when he’d called Tommy in the middle of the night, sobbing, struggling to breathe with a clean bottle of Jim Beam in his hands, begging him to help. He’d lost his house, he’d lost his job, he’d lost his daughter. Where to next? 

Tommy, all the way in Wyoming had scraped together some money, told Joel to get himself down to the mobile park and a steady job. Start from the bottom again. 

Sometimes, Joel resented his brother for not giving him that money for a flight to the West, smiling down the phone as he informed that they had a spare room for him, his nephew cooing in his bassinet and waiting for his old uncle. 

He understood though. When he wasn’t drunk it made more sense why he hadn’t invited him to his home. 

They hadn’t spoken in sixteen years. To his nephew whom he did not know the name of, he was just the deadbeat uncle who hadn’t made it out of Texas—still alive but lost. 

Tommy would’ve probably hated him more if he was sitting on Joel’s couch, staring at the porn and the beer, the cigarettes that his little brother knew he had only smoked when he was a rebellious teenager—the occasional pull never becoming a habit, especially when his daughter came along. 

Almost certainly would’ve despised him if he knew how he felt about the girl next door, the perverse catharsis he experienced when he took himself in hand and imagined taking care of her, shushing her whimpers, making her whine with the way he stretched her open. 

Oh, and he was a bad man. A bad fucking man and he was the last thing you needed. Some poor, young girl who was doing her best to make it. Pay the rent on time, make sure she was kept fed, all whilst juggling the inescapable feeling that once you were in the trailer park there was no getting out. 

Joel didn’t see an end. He’d been here for over a decade; his drug money was not for a new house or a new life, it was for whores and booze, a carton of Marlboro reds that he got for cheap from Bill, and porn. He’d collected all the goddamn vices—became a person so unlike who he was, so far from the quietly loveable single dad he’d been hailed as years ago. 

As far as Joel now was concerned, that guy was a fucking pussy. 

That guy would think he needed professional help for the way he thought about you, would expel every single image of you naked and writhing, tits bouncing in time with his thrusts as you lay boneless and crying in his grasp. 

You were legal. What was the big fucking deal? 

Joel needed this. You were not just some throwaway material good that would leave him in debt for the next ten years—you were full and gorgeous, smart, quick-witted and made him harder than the oak tree that stood centuries-old just a little down the road from the old Palmer farmhouse. 

That day you’d heard him talking about you to his friends, the way he’d lied and said that you were dumb, when you’d come storming up his porch steps—all rage and heat—and cussed him out, he’d laughed. It didn’t matter about the taunts and the sniggers he got from his buddies who he would have no issue never speaking to again. They could go fuck themselves for all he cared because you hadn’t willingly thrown yourself at his feet and licked his boots. 

Whores were easy. No challenge with a whore, no longing, no desire, just a mutual understanding that this was transactional and she was going to moan as loud as you wanted her to whether it felt good or not. 

But you had given Joel something worth chasing. And fuck he was going to catch you, even if it meant he’d die in the chair he sat in, with nothing to show for his life except a case of Bud, an empty fridge, and a stain on his bedsheets where you’d reached for him—begging for everything he could not give.

Something about him had you checking your appearance before you walked out the door, making your hair presentable, touching up your lipgloss, blotting the oil from your face. All for a man who saw you as nothing but jailbait

You wanted to be wanted. To be looked at with a fire, an urge to grasp you and take you fully, pull you close when you cried and kiss you when you shook with the need to run far away. You wanted to be kept, to be reminded every day that you were needed, loved and desired.

You wanted Joel. 

Joel: the sad old man next door, the dangerously handsome figure in your life that stood six feet tall, jaw sharp and strong, muscles straining with his arms crossed—built big and firm. A chest you’d very much like to lay your head on. A bulge in his pants you’d very much like to see stripped bare. 

So when the opportunity came, you seized it, with an iron first, intent on capturing what had been yours since the day you’d moved to the free prison—since the day he’d stared at you, an unadulterated and irremovable, perverse desire that shook the very beings of your existence. That determined exactly who you are and how you would fall for the watchful eyes and glinting gaze that befell you every time you stepped down the rotten wood steps at the foot of the trailer entrance. 

You stepped onto them then, Chuck Taylors strapped to your feet, laces loose and lazily tied, skin smoothed from the razor you’d pressed against it in the shower that morning—all for him. The appearance every bit of expectation you had for his fantasies and ideals, hoping that the attire would thrust him further into abandoning a morality he did not have. 

The sun set rapidly behind you, the grass long and dry around your ankles, unmowed—as you nor Joel had ever discussed who would get mowing duty—and a clear head. A set destination, unstifled by a long day at work, the sweat curling along your back too harsh to be ignored and the sometimes discourteous demeanour of Joel’s so powerful that you often wondered why you liked him. Why you gave so much attention to a man years ahead of you, unable to look at you without laughing at the prospect you thought you were more to him than a pretty thing to look at whilst he wallowed in his castle of self-pity he’d built for himself all these years spent trapped and lonely. 

It all seemed insignificant that day you’d crossed the boundary between lot seventeen and lot eighteen. When you’d shakily advanced up his steps, onto the porch you grew so fond of, and knocked once, twice, thrice on the white door—stepping back to await his welcome. Hoping to god that he’d see you and take you there. 

The shuffling on the other side of the door raised your heart rate, a sweat forming on the back of your neck which you brushed away with a hasty hand, intimidated by what awaited you when the white disappeared and transformed into bulking arms and a firm chest—a tall body that you gazed up at with ardour. 

When the sight appeared, you gulped away the desire to run away, to pretend that you’d just come here for the leaky tap and that there was no other reason you had bothered him on his peaceful Sunday afternoon. No ulterior motive. Not that you just wanted to see him because he had hardly been around the past couple of days and in truth you were worried about him; you wanted to make him feel better. 

“Hi.” He struggled to conceal the surprise in his voice, seemingly struggling further to keep the thickness in his throat at bay, the redness of his eyes that displayed days of restlessness and insomnia. “You alright?” 

“Yeah,” you murmured impassively, licking your lips, swallowing away the dryness in your throat at the state of him: burning cigarette in hand, flannel shirt unbuttoned and displaying the white wifebeater that lay underneath. The shape of his belly was visible underneath it, his belt purposefully unbuckled and hanging from the loops of his jeans. “I’m alright.” 

There was a twitch of his lips as he stared down at you, eyes flitting from head to toe—shameless in the way he always was. In the way you liked. 

“You sure?” 

It seemed stupid suddenly: the entire situation. The call you felt towards him, the want you had to curl up against his chest, let him hold you and tell you he was proud of you for opening up to him—telling him how fucking much you wanted him, despite knowing exactly how it would end if you were to venture further into a relationship that surpassed just neighbours. 

So instead of inviting yourself in, seducing him until he fell to his knees, tugged you by the waist and begged you for just the smallest piece of yourself, you succumbed to your insecurity, and retreated from the palace walls. 

“Yeah…yeah, it’s just that my taps leaking again.” For a split second, he almost looked irritated, eyes honing in on you, narrowing with a look of aggravation—confirmed by the clench of his jaw. You appeased him, saying, “You don’t have to come over now. I just thought I’d tell you,” and the expression slowly slipped away into something much more sinister: mirth. 

“Sure thing, pretty girl,” he said as he slinked away from the doorframe, inviting you into his home, coaxing you past the threshold as he fumbled about in the fridge and pulled out two beers. 

Contemplating, you stared at him, the flex of his muscles as he uncapped each bottle, the stature and size of him as he hunched over the counters, turning around to hold out a drink to you. An invitation. One that you had expected you’d have to give yourself—that you’d have to kick and cry before he ever let himself find you. 

“Just have a drink,” he soothed in that southern lull of his, the words rolling from his tongue with ease. As if he had practised the scenario before he knew it would befall him. “No point in worrying over your tap, I can’t do anything until I buy new washers. I’m out 'cause of you.” 

The irritation he’d shown earlier seemed palpable now—as if he was inviting you into his home simply to make you as uncomfortable as possible, hold you down by the hips until you promised to leave him alone. A taunt, a ploy to make sure you would never get what you wanted. 

However, you had never stepped foot in his trailer, had only ever been on his porch and ran your hand over the chair he frequented, wondering what it looked like beyond the four walls, and curiosity prevailed as it always did. 

Uncertainly, you stepped onto the carpet, gently closing the door behind you, and mumbled a thank you as you took the beer from his hand. 

Almost immediately, you felt like apologising for his irrational emotions. 

“I’m sorry,” you muttered. “I didn’t mean to put you out. I’ll pay for whatever you need-”

“You pay in ways you don’t know. I don’t need your money.” 

The cryptic way in which he spoke, the casualness as he gave you a look that hinted at something you couldn’t decipher and the slow saunter to his armchair left you in a state of uncertainty. Standing there, with a beer wetting your hand, a frown on your face and a furrowed brow, you had no idea where to go next. What would await you if you questioned him—the things you would discover that were best left in the hands of God and no one else. 

Again, curiosity thrust its violent hand into your stomach and forced your feet to start moving towards him, hoping that he’d appreciate your bravery—your denial of your urges to run far away. It was noted, however, that Joel Miller could care less about bravery. That the quality itself was right down at the bottom of the ladder and that he could and would not give a shit if you welcomed his advances in spite of your lack of courage. 

Hesitantly, you planted yourself on his couch, the furniture built into the wall, curving into an L shape where you imagined he’d kick his feet up after a long day, palm the bulge in his jeans and pick from the litany of porn that you took one glance at and thought better than to stare at it too long in case he felt offended by your interest. 

The discovery admittedly took away a little of his allure. 

“Make yourself at home,” he insisted, taking a sip of his beer and urging you to do the same with a single nod of his head. The slight twitch of his lips when you did so caused your body to go squirming, shifting uncomfortably in your seat as the fire raged within you—unable to be sated with the way he looked at you then. 

Just a scoff, a sip, and a glance at your lips before he turned away completely and focused his attention on the blank TV screen— his reflection the only entertainment. 

Silence grew uncomfortable, the bitter taste of alcohol coating the back of your throat, dripping down your oesophagus and choking any words that you wished to say. The heat emanating from him was overpowering even from the distance you sat apart, the scent of cigarettes overwhelming, so much so that you needed a distraction, anything to dull the rest of your senses from shutting down—all because of his powerful presence; the effect he had on you even when he sat still and awaited your call. 

“What did you mean?” The words came tumbling from your mouth, driven by an insatiable desire and lacklustre confidence you had somewhere deep in the pits of your stomach, bubbling with the acid that nestled there until it rose to the surface—bile transforming into questions that could leave you in a shell of humiliation. At his furrowed brow, you expanded. “About me paying in ways I don’t know.” 

He leaned forward in his seat, elbows resting on his knees. Sombre, all of a sudden. Staring into the barrel of his bottle, the brown glass reflecting like constellations on his face—accentuating the sharp angle of his jawline, the sunken hollows of his cheekbones. 

When his eyes nestled on yours, burrowing right into your skull, you couldn’t move. Couldn’t even fathom the thought of taking a lungful of air, waiting with your breath held tight inside, for his answer. 

“You shouldn’t go asking questions like that.” He sipped quietly, wetting his lips by flicking his tongue in and out, averting his gaze back to the shadow of himself in the television. “You’ll get yourself in trouble.” 

It was not the answer you wished for, eyes downcast, focused on your shaking knee as you tried to gauge some form of clarity beneath the mystery that clouded the gates to his head—what lay beneath his skull; what you wished to find. 

Against your better judgment, you pressed further, keeping the beer bottle clutched between your hands and hoping it would stay cold forever. 

“I can handle myself.” It came out more confident than you had expected, your bobbing knee ceasing its movement, your dry throat provided with moisture. A break from the anxious sweat you had broken out in. “If you don’t tell me I’ll just leave a hundred dollars on your doorstep and leave you alone.” 

You hoped quietly, in that stifling room, that he would make sure it didn’t come to that. That he would let you pay in any way he saw fit. You hoped that the sad hulk of a man sitting in the lone chair with porn in every drawer and money set aside for whores, would let you have him—bring back a semblance of light to his eyes. Find out what kept the despondency trapped so tight around him, the crown of thorns on his head expanding until it reached his feet and kept him locked in nature's prison—skin scratched, bloody and unable to be healed unless he found someone willing to cut through the overgrowth. 

He seemed to bristle at your words, shoulders tightening, jaw clenching in the manner he did when he was irritated. You’d seen it before when Dale had been drunk and had followed you home. When you’d stumbled uncomfortably to your trailer and pleaded Joel who sat on his porch, almost looking like he was waiting for you, to get him off your back. That tick, the downturn of his brow, the twitch of his lip, the look so intimidating you had rushed inside and watched through the window as Joel clapped a hand on Dale’s back and ushered him away from you.

You had no idea what he’d done after they’d left your sight but Dale barely looked at you after. The last interaction you’d had with him was the morning after when he’d knocked on your door, timid for a fifty-year-old man, and apologised. Joel had been there, like he almost always was—always dancing in your peripheral, waiting for you, taunting you—with a cup of coffee clasped between two hands and a smug look on his face when he watched the interaction. 

“You ain’t as smart as you think you are,” he uttered, slipping you away from the vignette and shattering the memory with his simple words. 

They stung. More than you cared to admit. 

Men were never this difficult, never this hard to get through to, never this confusing. He had given you every possible sign, every protection, every knowing look that confessed: you are everything I wish to have. 

It seemed every day he was further from you, every day he looked at you and thought that he was blinded by loneliness and that you were the last thing he needed to dote on. 

With the rejection, came vexation, a rumbling little thing that forced its way into your mouth—lips parting to let it out. 

“You’re not as discreet as you think you are.” As soon as they fell, the rest came following like a herd of bulls, a huge red flag flying through the air, right where Joel sat. They came for him, and you didn’t care enough to stop them. “I’m not stupid, no matter what you say.” 

The tick, tick, tick of his jaw. That subtle way his eyes narrowed, honing in on everything but the thing causing his problems, trying desperately to stop the truths from betraying his conceptions. 

“I see you, Joel. I see you through my bedroom window, using me as your personal stripper because you’re too fucking cheap to go down to the strip club and give a tip.” The push and pull was becoming apparent, the sympathy and disgust you held for him all at once growing and growing until all that prevailed was rage. That after everything, he still refused. That he was still a fucking coward no matter how many faces he pulled at anyone who looked at him wrong. You would not be deterred by the look he gave you then: one that should’ve made you shrink away in fear he would do something rash. “I see the way you looked at me from day fucking one. Just a pair of tits to stare at, a new young girl that you can prey on-”

“Stop.” 

“I’m not stupid.” Your voice was rising rapidly, your lips downturned in a scowl, unable to see the danger that befell you if you continued. “I know how you talk about me to your friends, I know that you make a show of being this immovable thing that no one can ever get to because you’re so wrapped up in your own self-pity that you can’t even admit to yourself that the only thing you are is a fucking pervert. And an asshole.” 

“You are crossing a line, little girl.” 

His words fell on deaf ears, a scoff coming from the back of your throat—so many things that you wanted to say but couldn’t voice. You settled for a final, blow. One that might kick him off his feet. 

“I know you stole my panties.” Jaw ticking, teeth grinding so hard they were liable to turn to dust in his mouth. “Took them right off my bathroom floor. Could you not help yourself? Are you that sad, Joel? Are you that much of a fucking perve-” 

Silenced by the way he towered, standing upright, bottle discarded by the leg of his chair and fury dancing in his eyes—so apparent and profound you finally stopped and cowered. 

“You don’t know a thing about me.” 

You were stunned into submission, finally on the end of his intimidation—a feat that was sure to happen sooner rather than later. You were just another Dale, just another one of his victims that he shot down with narrowed eyes and a nasty tone of voice that forced you to swallow down the confidence—sending it right back to your stomach, and burning the false assurance away. 

“I have been cordial with you for as long as possible.” There was danger in the way he spoke so calmly, a tremor in your hands as he stepped forward, facing you completely, and kneeled before you—eyes boring into yours, forcing you to look at him with the hand he placed on the couch beside you. “I’ve tried my hardest to be respectable but you make it so damn difficult.” 

“I’m sorry,” you began, wishing you could take it all back, wishing that you could’ve used your boldness for better: crawled into his lap and let him hold you, sank to your knees like he and worshipped him with every bit of yourself you had.

“Sh, sh, sh,” he shook his head, the hand on the couch, moving, the weight of it resting there dissipating and falling even heavier on the side of your face. “You can’t take it back now.” 

Nerves slipped like rapids through your stomach, the damn thing churning so much you began to feel sick with the anticipation and fear you felt being closer to him than you ever had been before. Your mouth opened as if to speak, then closed again when you realised that your throat had closed, the inside of your mouth dry and unable to lubricate your words with credibility as they fell from your lips.

“You think I’m a pervert?” he asked, eyes expecting an answer, eyebrows raising to help you find a response. “Hm?” 

“Yes.” The monosyllable fell shakily, unable to lie when he was looking at you so harshly, all whilst stroking your cheekbone with his thumb and engulfing the right side of your face with one, big, warm hand. 

He nodded with knowing, his other hand falling to your bare knee. You were crowded by him, completely consumed by his presence and with a harsh swallow, you hoped that he would slip away and allow you to breathe—if only for a moment. 

“I know,” he said with finality, your cheek whacked with cold air as he removed his hand, quickly providing you with warmth again as he pressed his thumb to your chin, holding it delicately. Making sure you couldn’t look away from him. “But you like it, don’t you?” he brushed the bottom of your lip with his nail, an uncontrollable shiver running through you that he revelled in.

He’d called your bluff entirely. He’d locked you up in his cage, gave you the upper hand for just a second, made you believe that you could get away from him if you kicked and screamed enough, only to leave you hopeless as he twisted the key to the right, and threw the metal that granted you freedom, into the fire. 

“If you had an issue with me looking, you’d close the drapes. You’re a smart girl, I’m sure it ain’t too hard for you.” 

His patronisation, his demeanour that consisted of arousal and determination, had a small breath puffing from your lungs, a sudden and overwhelming heat crawling from each of his hands and into your head—breaking your rationale and leaving you pliable and willing in his grasp. He’d got you. Right there. And if he wanted you, you would let him have you. 

“And if you didn’t want me to steal your panties, then you shouldn’t have left them there.” 

It was unbelievable, the way he twisted the blame onto you, the way he made you believe in everything he was saying with a simple swipe of his thumb over your bottom lip and a look in his eyes that stopped you from questioning him. 

“Yes, Joel, I’m sorry, Joel,” were the only words swimming through your head: words that you would’ve spoken aloud had he not stunned you into silence, the hand on your knee sliding along your skin, up towards the hem of your shorts where he slipped his fingers under and skimmed the skin concealed by the denim. 

“You understand me, little girl?” 

“I’m not a little girl,” you managed, voice shaky as the warmth of him engulfed you entirely, wrapped up in the scent of him, the feel of the callouses along your smooth skin and the eyes piercing you. If looks could kill…if those pretty eyes could rip you apart with the viciousness of their stare. 

“No you ain’t,” he murmured, gripping your chin, thumb rubbing along the flesh of your bottom lip, the skin bouncing as he peeled it back and let go. “I know you ain’t.” 

There seemed a flood came over his being, a white wave of purity dowsing him, ridding him of every adulteration and forcing sense back into his head as the hand fell from your face, the one on your inner thigh taking longer to slip away before the cloud of insensibility faded and he arrived to a semblance of morality. 

You watched as he stumbled over to the kitchen, hand working over the scruff he called a beard and forced his eyes away from you. 

“Joel,” you called softly, finally gaining back a little strength now he wasn’t crowding you; forcing you to look at him and make the first move so his conscience could be clean. 

“Just go.” The words were uttered much softer than before, the delicacy of his voice surprising you but the strain that coated his throat a reminder that this was still Joel Miller. Dangerously beautiful Joel Miller with a lifetime of terror stashed somewhere in the backrooms of his mind, a darkness in the depths of his eyes you couldn’t help but be frightened by, and a story you wished he would tell. A story that stretched years back to the life before he crept past the opening gates of Shady Springs Mobile Park and left a life that you had no clue wether  had been better or worse than his life now. “I’ll come over tomorrow afternoon and have a look at that tap. You might have to get maintenance round soon though if it keeps up.” 

“I don’t like strangers…in my house.” Your words trailed off at the end of your sentence, caught up in the possibilities of your words and how he would reply. If he would see right through you and clock how you’d only spoken because the tap was one of the biggest ties you had to Joel. If he would realise that you’d thought about getting maintenance months ago when it first started dripping but didn’t want a permanent fix, no matter how annoying. All because of Joel Miller and the way he’d perversely captured you in the plot of some barely legal porno that you would’ve turned your nose up at if it was anyone but him and you. 

You and Joel. 

The thought sounded nice—the reality a little less nicer. 

“Yeah, well…” he leant back on the countertops, arms crossed over his chest, eyes bloodshot and bordered by black—an undeniable piece of evidence that Joel perhaps wasn’t doing as well as he made everyone believe; that there was something deeper tugging at his mind and causing such aggravation. 

After a moments silence, when he looked at you and you looked right back at him, your head clear and working properly again, you diverted the conversation elsewhere—a ploy to hack deeper at his head and find what lay underneath his skull. 

“Are you okay?” Simple, easy. Not difficult to ascertain the concern laced deep in your tone because you were concerned for him. The moment he’d opened the door after days of barely seeing him, time spent cursing the fact he could peer through your windows but you could not peer through his, you knew something was wrong. That there was something happening to him. Something dangerous. Your sympathy began to overtake everything else, memory shed of all the times he had wronged you and replaced with the very little he had done right. “You look…tired. Exhausted, really.” 

“I’m fine,” he said with finality, the rage in his eyes returning but with less power this time. The fatigue was setting in, the constant running from himself finally catching up to him. 

“Are you sure?”

“I said I’m fine.” It shut you up well enough, so much so that you began to lose the commiserations. You could always say you tried. “Now get out of my house.” 

It was the final thing he said to you before he slipped away, striding down the hallway, footsteps echoing until he reached the bedroom; the click of the door resounding throughout the trailer. 

You stared at the spot where he’d kneeled, a finger brushing softly over your lip before shaking away the self-pity and gently placing the beer bottle on the table that sat next to his chair. 

Looking one last time at the door at the end of the hallway, shadowed and guarded by snapping dogs, you opened the door, the damn thing creaking as if to shout to everyone within a mile radius that you had made no progress with the man you desperately wanted, and stepped out. Leaving your pride on the doorstep. 

© virginreprise

thanks for reading !

[unit2beth]

For the first version I used pro markers. I got the colour palette from the package of a game of checkers from the 1920s. I like how the yellow bad green look together and I feel like I wouldn’t usually have picked that colour combination. After using pro markers though I wasn’t too happy with the shade of yellow as it was too bright. So I went over it with a white coloured pencil to make it more pastel.

For the second one I used gouache paint. I really like how this one turned out because it is simple but effective. I changed to yellow to a blue just to see if it would look any better. And I do think I prefer the blue. However I didn’t pick it for my final collection because I prefer go the media I used on the first version looks. I did also use coloured pencil on top of the gouache just to help enhance the details.

Originally I wanted each circle to be a different colour and all the colours to be scattered randomly throughout the dress. However when I started using the water colour I found that it would look more elegant if I did more of a gradient down the dress. I wanted the watercolour to run more freely so I firstly covered the design in just water before blobbing the watercolour on top of that.

For the second version I decided to do a college to help me achieve something similar to my original idea. However I decided to go with a monochrome colour scheme. I love how all the different textures look together as I used some shiny and some plain papers. I also added some details with a blue posca pen.

I wanted to experiment with using shiny silver foil and I thought this would be the perfect design for it as it is the most fun one. I kept the design quiet simple by just adding one colour to make the silver standout. My favourite part is the shoes.

I then decided that I wanted to experiment with inks. I only own two different coloured inks so my colour palette was very limited. However I still made it work. However I do think this version is a bit too simple for my liking. I did end up using some watercolour to make the skin colour more natural instead of vibrant pink.

I was very excited to add media to this design because I knew that I wanted to use my new shiny watercolours. I wasn’t expecting much from them but they actually worked very well. I used them around to emphasise details on the skirt. I really wanted to see how much detail I could create with just using watercolours and no pencils. And I think it went quite well as I managed to create a texture on the skirt.

The second version of this design is done with pro markers. I love using pro markers but it is sometimes hard because it limits your colour options. I used a more funky colour scheme of purple and green. I tried to blend the markers by continuously layering the darker and lighter shades over each other.

[inessencedevided]

(You can find the set that this gif belongs to here 💙)

From planning to posting, share your process for making creative content!

To continue supporting content makers, this tag game is meant to show the entire process of making creative content: this can be for any creation.

RULES: When your work is tagged, show the process of its creation from planning to posting, then tag 5 people with a specific link to one of their creative works you’d like to see the process of. Use the tag #showyourprocess so we can find yours

I was tagged by @aheartfullofjolllly. thank you so much Pat! it was really fun to reflect about my own process 💗 You can find her post here and @lan-xichens' post that started it all here :)

Also thank you @huigusu 🥰 (who tagged me for my nie brothers set) I'll get to that one in a few days!

Now Pat gave me two sets to chose from to show my process, so obviously I chose the more complicated one :P

I only work in Photoshop CC 2018. I know that there are programs out there for easier cutting and sharpening but I have only just figured out how to do that in PS and I am too lazy to figure out any other programs right now xD

1. Idea and Planning

This set, like most of my sets with lyrics started with me reading the poem, clutching my heart and going "oh shit this fits my favourite characters!!". The idea actually started with me thinking that the first stanza of the poem would go really well with wwx during the burial mounds arc. Then I realized that the last stanza fits lwj better than him and from there came the idea to contrast the both of them next to each other. This is when I realized I wanted to do a dark-light contrast set, though I did not know that I would go with red and blue at that time. My idea in the beginning was just to do a black and white set

I was really impressed by how Pat said that she plans her sets around exact timestamps. Because I don't do that at all ^^ I just get ideas for which scenes would fit (in this case the wwx burial mounds scenes and lwj's kneeling and punishments scene) and then I watch the scenes to narrow them down.

Back when I made this set, I still used a screenrecorder (AceThinker Screen Grabber Pro to be precise. They have a test version that allows you to record up to 3 minutes) and recorded the scenes I needed from Netflix. This worked well enough but now I have the entire show saved on an external drive and it makes a world of difference when it comes to gif sharpness

Now, in this case I had to repeat this step once because when I was almost finished, I realized that I wanted a gif for the lwj corner but let's pretend I didn't do that and that's the way this gif was always going to look because otherwise this post will be way too long ^^

2. Creation

Short disclaimer: The creation process for this gifset was anything but linear. Multiple effects I used here were things I had never tried before. I just had a vague idea and tried to realize it through trial and error. So whenever I say "then I did xyz", it is implied that I ultimately went back to that step several times and changed stuff ^^

I started with the Wei Wuxian part of the gif. I usually use a frame rate of 0,06 (with some variation depending on gif length and size). I work in timeline so I converted all the layers to a smart layer. Then I resized the gif into a square, leaving big chunks of the gif empty (as can be seen below.) I flipped the gif horizontally, so he is looking inwards. This was simple because I felt it fitted the composition better. Then I imported the Lan Wangji part of the gif, again with a frame rate of 0,06. (Image 2)

After that I created a layer for masking in a separate PS document by rotating a square until it was point down (is that a rhombus?). I sized it to match my gif (540x540 pxl) and copied it over. (Image 3) a bit of masking magic and ta da! There's the basic layout (Image 4)

I put a layer of solid black behind wwx to get rid of the transparent bits (Image 5) and then started adding more white and black to both sides by adding solid whit and black layers that i put masks on and changed the opacity as i needed (Image 6)

("reading" direction: from the upper left to the lower right corner)

Then I fiddled with the colours a bit. The first thing I always do is using the curves layer to get more contrast. Then I use the colour balance tool and the selective colouring tool to get rid of that cql-typical cyan tint after that it's just trying to have it look "natural" while the colours still fit the overall scheme. This was difficult here because wei Wuxian’s side of the gif was very dark and when i turned up the saturation to see which colour dominated it was a very weird mixture of multiple colours. That's when i decided that I'd just go with red on his side, since lwj's side was already so blue and those to look great as contrasts.

After that just came a lot of fiddling with selective colour layers and brightness and contrast unti I has happy. There really wasn't much to it ^^. (Image 1)

After that I added the text. I knew I wanted the two lines to for a square of some kind. So I tried different fonds until I arrived at the one below. The two lines are in seperate layers so I could move them around and change the spacing between the letters until I was happy with the layout. I also changed the layer mode for the text to "difference" (is that what it's called in english? my PS is set to german sorry ^^), keeping their colour white. (Image 2)

I originally hadn't planned adding anything else but I felt like the gifs (plural because I switched between the gifs of this set) was still kind of empty and lacking, so I added the tear down the middle (a tutorial for that is either coming up later or already posted. I recently got an ask for this :)) (Image 3)

It still felt empty after that, so I tried different overlays. Okay no, first I wasted a lot of time on different free image sides but then I tried out different ones until I chose the one you can see in the finished gif. I liked that one because a) I felt the round shape was a nice contrast to all the straight lines already there and b) because once I applied a black and white filter to it and switched the layer setting to "difference" (again, i hope this is the correct translation) it looked a bit like a moon. (Gif at the top)

("reading" direction: from left to right)

And that's it! :)

Although in general, these gifs took so much fiddling! I went back and forth between them a lot and sometimes almost redid the entire thing because I had no idea what I was doing in the beginning and by the time I noticed an error, the only way to fix it was ti redo everything. So yeah, this set definitely is the the one that took me the longest out of all the ones I've posted so far.

3. Posting

I save all my gifs to my drafts first to see what they look like put together and to check if they look any different on mobile. Usually i do this several times and change stuff until I'm happd enough with it to hit post. Once i am happy enough, i can't hold back. Doesn't matter if it's at a time when nobody is online, i hit post 😅

And that's it!

Tagging:

@lanwuxiann for this gifset (I adore it so much. I've looked at it and read it severat times since you posted it and the poem just kills me every time!)

@suibianjie for this gifset (The combination of static images and gifs in your gifs is always absolutely perfect! This one is only my favourite of yours because the light coming from behind wwx is just so pretty!!! ^^)

@sweetlittlevampire for this piece (It was soooo hard to pick a piece of yours because I have so many favourites! But this one is just so out if this world, I want to know how you worked that magic :D)

@wei-gege for this set (sparkling shijie! 😭 that set is so incredibly beautiful! I love how you matched the colour of the overlay with her dress!)

@purplexedhuman for this set (your gifs are always incredible! I chise this one because it showcases both your colouring skills and some really intricate effects)

If any of you have already been tagged or don't have the time or energy for this, obviously no pressure to do this at all! 🥰

(btw, I originally tried to place the actual text of this under a "read more" cut but somehow it always messed with the order of the images, so this ended up as a rather long post. sorry!)

[help-im-a-gay-fish]

Agave Syrup: ship kid. Secondary collab verse.

Annnnnd here's the new baby! She's my Cciller ship kid. She exists the the secondary ship kid universe which is a collab verse with @thebluescreen. She's from the Multiverse Rem is a part of, but not from the multiverse Coffee creamer is from. (They are two separate multiverses with different ships and storys.)

Both Agave and 4Loko are the same person, I'll explain below.

"yall really for a no caff, full foam, double chocolate latte, with an extra hit of caramel syrup!? It's my own special blend..... Added just for you~"

Name: Agave Syrup

Gender: Female

Sexuality: Strate

Parents: (Bio) Ccino (Da) and Killer (Baba). Non bio Nightmare (Father).

Other family: Rem (older half brother) Vanta (older half brother) Somba Lullaby (older half brother). Dream (uncle) Cross (Uncle) Radiant Hope (Cousin) Empathy (Cousin). And many cats.

Nicknames: Kitten (by killer) and Gave

Agave is the youngest of the Fluffynightkiller ship kids from the second verse. She grew up primary raised By Ccino and her oldest brother Rem. Killer and Nightmare were there, but weren't massively involved parents.

Agave is pretty close to her brother Rem, despite the 13 year age gap and will normally have a fortnightly movie night where they will watch crappy horror movies (like Jack Frost or The Sand) and laugh about how stupid they are. They also both love to watch old horror movies and play a game of "what incredibly stupid choice will character A make that will result in there death? Hmmm". It's there favourite thing to do together.

Agave isn't a huge fan of generally good horror films though and especially can't stand the saw films. So she doesn't watch them unless it's with Rem.

Agave and her other brother Somba aren't as close (he's 5 years older) but she still cares alot for him and isn't above defending him if needed.

Agave has two main sides to herself, this being how she is normally and her persona/alterego 4Loko. But more on that below.

Normally she is a very bright and chipper girl who's abit of a goof. She sees the fun or silly side in alot of things in life and is rarely not in a good mood. She's also quite a passive person (or at least pretends to be) and is quite kind. Her personality is abit to much like Dream's for Nightmare's liking so the two aren't really close.

She's that person who is very fun to be around but just slightly unnerving. Like there is something going on underneath her smile. Something just slightly off.

Being born with her soul on the outside of her body wasn't suprising because of her relation to Killer, however it caused Ccino to be conserned during her up bringing. He were quite scared about how easily she could be hurt of killed so always kept a close eye on her. Killer didn't care as much and gave her more free rain. For example, letting her play with this pocket knife as a 1 year old.

Agave works primarily at her Da's coffee shop and takes great pride in it. She grew up there and its been a part of her life ever since she can remember. She enjoys making her own flavouring syrups and blends to put into drinks to make them taste better. Other then that she's studying a business degree (at age 18 +) at a local university in order to get better with the business.

About 4Loko and her soul.

"Me? And serial killer? No no I'm a barista, those aren't even similar....."

Now this is where things start up, because she's got to inherit some things from Killer, right?

Agaves soul glitches, much like Killer's does, from being heart shaped to being target shaped. It does this many times a day. When this happens it normally doesn't last longer then a few seconds till it goes back to normal. To an outsider it may even be unnoticeable and for the most part it doesn't effect Agave.

However sometimes she will trap her soul into a jar or some type of container. Doing this will stop it from glitching and stick it in whatever form its in (she can't do this all the time as it strains the soul and brings pain). So sometimes she will stick it in target mode. When she sticks it in target mode, her eyes drip.

Unbeknownst to any of her parents when her soul is like this, it changes her. She feels basically nothing, no fear, no sadness, no guilt or empathy. She realised at a young age that this was her super power.

In this mode she could do anything and not suffer any emotional consequences.

It started with stealing cookies from the biscuit tin at age 9 and evolved into hurting bully's at school. Then into giving food poisoning to rude customers by mixing up syrups to slip into drinks to make people ill.

For the most part she stays out of this mode, only dipping in when she felt she needed to test how far she could push it.

When she was 15 she started to consider pushing it to the limit.

She was watching the news and found out about some kind of abuser or murder being arrested and she thought. Why do we let people who do such horrible things live? Wouldn't it be better if they were dead? Then she realised, with her super power, could she kill someone?

When she was 16 she had her first kill. They were robber shed caught beating someone in an alleyway. (I don't know to much about this yet so I'll need to think more about it) but afterwards, she realised that she'd been right in the fact that she didn't feel guilty. She could use this to make the world a better place!

She didn't kill again for about a year. (just incase, I wanna point out that I'm not saying that what Agave does is justified. She's just an ship kid, a act of fiction and not ment to be taken seriously)

So anyway, by age 17 Agave makes her second kill and continues on that path. These are alot more thought out and planned. Her method of choice is through creating poisonous syrup and killing people that way, though she isn't above a good old knife death. Her Baba taught her well. She also carries around chemicals to clean blood and things like that.

She doesn't like her victims to dweal in pain and gets the deaths over quickly and painlessly. She gets no pleasure from causing pain to others, and when she doesn't have a target soul it makes her upset to hurt people.

Agave ended up calling her killer mode 4Loko. That's the name for her alterego the serial killer. She separates 4Loko from herself and doesn't want it to impact her Day to day life. So she will use make up to cover the birth mark on her face. When she's in her 20s she ends up working as an hireable assassin for killing criminals. But more on that later.

Non of her parents know about her double life. But that doesn't mean no one does.

Rem has always kept a close eye on his little sister. Over the years he noticed her odd behaviour and her collection of 'syrups' that she keeps in her room hidden.

During her 17th year he confronts her about what she does (which was a huge mess) the two fought as she attempted to stab him through the soul with her knife. She couldn't let him live if he knew right? She would have been able to but she just couldn't bring herself to hurt him. Since she wasn't in target mode she just couldn't do it especially as he spoke to her and talked her down. (tbh it's actually a kind of sweet scene between them).

After he's calmed her Rem offers to help her kill people, and he's very happy to. (Rem has alot of darkness under his kind surface which I'm sure @thebluescreen would be more then happy to explain in better detail).

So the two grow closer through that.

And yeah, that's the basic run down of my Cciller baby.! Hope you like her! My barista turned murderer/hitman I figured this would be a good mix of both her parents.

You have no idea! How long I spent working on her colour scheme..... It took about a month till I finally had this one and I'm pretty happy with it. I hope I explained everything about her double life well, I wasn't sure how clear it is. If you have any questions, please ask.

<3

[randomnameless]

Needing that evening salt

While I thank @nilsh13 for giving me the link to that interview.

I was like “prepare for a ton of salt, take your lemons”  however, I’ve kind of mellowed out a bit because the VA seems to be a really nice person -

and I’ve read the Toyonaga interview recently.

Sometimes, the VA are allowed to interpret the character in a certain way that fits with what the game developpers more or less intended (granted they are the same guys who didn’t hire a continuity guy so...), and sometimes, it fails because direction sucks, because lenses are given and doesn’t match with the content you’re adaptating.

As a result, we have Jp!Rhea and lolcalised!Rhea.

i wonder if inoue will ever make an interview one day about 3H but I doubt it

We start with the infamous 

“You don’t have to try it so much (to be the calm and composed person), Rhea doesn’t try, she just is - The essence of Rhea is enough”

Pat no :’(

But... Rhea isn’t calm and composed, Rhea is emotional, pretty much, she’s a bubble waiting to burst and she tries to be calm and composed and keep a facade (more on that later) but, I feel like the “Rhea doesn’t try she just is” might be the reason why lolcalised!Rhea feels detached during certain events, when Aelfric’s attempted Nabatean homonculi Transmutation backfires, when Kikuko Inoue nails the sense of sadness and dread because, uh, a man she just said she saw as her own child basically died here to become a grotesque monster and attempted to replicate her own mistakes. 

Rhea tries to be a calm and composed person, she managed to keep up appearances for, apparently, 1000 years, but Rhea is also emotional as fuck.

But... This is where everything falls apart.

“You were given the direction - paraphrasing - to channel your inner Dumbledore?”

It’s safe to assume most people can draw parallels to “Three Houses and Harry Potter”

And Leigh falls in the biggest trap, trying to “play the game and figure out who is who” because, while I think someone replied to an earlier post about the parallel (i’m really sorry when i finally had time to reply 2 weeks had passed and i didn’t want to necropost), but I still firmly disagree, and truth to be told, this is, in a way, what I was afraid of when 3H was announced.

FE is a series that loves to reference itself, so when it was announced that the next game would be set in a school, and Bernie and Dorothea were previewed I grew really afraid that the game was going to have the typical “North American High School AU” and none of the “Fire Emblem” series. We had the recluse, Sylvain appeared to be the frat boy, I was expecting the cheerleader, Ignatz to be the nerd etc etc.

With the HP thing, and “trying to see who is who”, I feel like the localisation team and the VA were trying to look at the game with a special - tailored by them for their own use - lens. I will not say “western” lens, but they were trying to look for things that just... aren’t?

Yes, 3H took inspiration from the latest behemoth who was trending at that time, but it wasn’t HP, it was ASOIAF. 

And even then, it is only a flair and a colour scheme. 

If Edel isn’t enough, the Golden Deer, with its specific color scheme immediately calls back to the Baratheon sigil (a black stag on a field of gold, when the Golden Deer is a deer... on a field of gold). House Lannister and Arryn are reversed, the Lion isn’t associated to the Red House but to the Blue one, and the Eagle (actually the Arryn sigil is a falcon) leaves the Moon to the Blue House and lands in the Red House. And the Ashen Wolves are... grey wolves on a white field, like this house. IS managed to take animals from traditional european heraldry, but with the colors and the specific animals picked? It’s hard to deny the ASOIAF nod.

Hubert calls the mole people snakes, but it is his own nickname, the death cult has its own name, Agarthans. They never use a snake of their banner, nor refer to themselves as such.

Bar the aesthetics? 

IS wanted the monastery to be a nod to FE Jugdral’s Barahra Royal Academy, a place where, apparently, heirs of various nations could study together and form lasting friendships, which were supposed to prevent wars (or at least made former alumnis of said academy sad to fight against each other).

But because FE Jugdral wasn’t released overseas, and someone didn’t do their homework about the series (when Toyonaga is a big fan of the Jugdral saga), the monastery, and its academy, was linked to... HP.

Rhea isn’t Dumbledore. Rhea is an amalgation of Gotoh - the mentor who guides you - and, twist, of Tiki! 

If Seteth doubted Billy’s abilities, it is tied to their own nature as a self-insert, Fred doubted Robin when they first met, but then mellowed out. Or, without the avatar angle, when Greil trusts Ike, and later on, Titania, Shinon doubts him until the end (or until you recruit him).

So with a blurred lens, it is no wonder why localised!Rhea is so different from Inoue!Rhea. 

Then Leigh continues on with the interview, noting how insecure she is, irl, and how Rhea helped her realise that “sometimes I don’t need to try to be someone else to fit it, it’s okay to just be myself” ...

:/

How can the direction give this impression of Rhea to her VA when Rhea, her character, is the complete opposite? 

Rhea tries to be someone else, she laments about it, she cannot be herself, she has to put on a facade and make careful choices and pick certain words as an archbishop, Rhea has to anonymously ask how to tell people she doesn’t like hot tea because she is afraid of hurting feelings, she wants to socialise with people but cannot due to her station and the role she has. Rhea has to pretend to be a guide and a leader to her people, when she only wants her Mother to return to assume this role she thinks she is butchering.

So, doubling Rhea should actually have the opposite effect, Rhea cannot “just be (her)self”! or maybe it’d be an advice Leigh gives to Rhea, the character?

So if you take the blurred lens coupled with the tragic direction given, Rhea’s depth is erased. She is instead turned into the scary fanatic who never emotes, save to raeg, and only wants to rez her mom.

Cute moment though, even if the topic is one I disagree on, where, talking about Rhea’s temper, Leigh says she wouldn’t want to encounter her when she’s stuck in traffic :) (lbr we all know Rhea would pull out the wings and reactor of her DeLorean and fly over everyone, without Billy though, she cannot time travel)

Tl; dr : Imposing doesn’t mean frightening, Leigh and the interviewer watched too much DBZ and ASOIAF (rather, GOT) was the “western” behemoth referenced in FE16, not HP. 

The other referenced behemoth was... well, a small series called Fire Emblem.

As always, I’m more willing to cut some slack for the VAs because the industries is more recent than the one in Japan, and/or roles weren’t directed the same way (do you know the guy who dubs Morgan Freeman in Wonder France also dubs the voice talking during Uncle Ben’s ads? Or Bruce Willis is in Martin Mystery?)

But the Directors? No. Games have been imported and translated/localised for several decades now, you can’t pull a “4Kids” anymore on content you do not understand or do not wish to understand, and butchering a character (or misunderstand a character that much) shouldn’t have happened in 2019. 

Dub is nice, when it exists, but for now, I’m still going to stick to Sub.

[bookworm-2692]

For the ZE Ask Game: 1b, 1e, 2a, 3d, 5e, 5f and 5n!

Thank you for sending the asks! I love talking about Zero Escape so thank you for enabling me :D

Questions from here

1b: Favourite character design?

Okay, you know how hard it is for me to pick favourite characters because they’re all wonderful and that’s why you went with this question haha. Hmm. There are so many good designs (especially with the colour coding!!!). I prefer the designs in the first two games, since they’re really bright and colourful, and the third game is darker and dingier. I like that each character has a main colour that stands out and doesn’t really belong to anyone else (except for Dio and K who both have the red and gold aesthetics, but that’s valid because red and gold is a brilliant aesthetic). I think in 999, my favourite is actually Junpei’s - I love the blue colour of his vest, and the blue vest and red shirt just. Work super well together. It’s a fashion disaster but it’s also an aesthetic I vibe with so. (also love the red blue colour coding with Junpei specifically so). In VLR, much as I loathe him, I really like Dio’s design. The top hat and the braids and the red and gold work really well together and it’s fun. Dio is super frustrating though, but his design slaps!

1e: Favourite scene?

Oooo tricky. There’s so many good moments. I think I have to go with the classic though - the moment in 999 True End where Junpei gets the safe end code, and the narration goes “How did Junpei know? He knew because I knew”. It’s so chilling and also so satisfying to see everything suddenly click. I love it, and I love watching people experiencing that for the first time. It’s like. The best part of the game, I reckon.

2a: Least favourite character?

Okay I’m trying to not immediately say Delta but like.... Delta. I think he had a super interesting concept, but the way it was executed made it so much worse. I hated that they just.... hid him from view so then the twist was that this character you didn’t even know existed was Zero? It just felt cheap. Also ~complex motives~ got really annoying - I would have much preferred it if he had said “yeah I’m only doing this to ensure my birth (and the birth of my sister). soz lmao”. Because that motive feels more real? Rather than just adding a whole random “religious fanatic” in a vague sort of way. I do like the concept of him and Phi being twins and being separated in such a way that they’re very different ages now, but again the execution of Sigma and Diana’s romance was like. Not done well.

So yeah, Delta is my least favourite because he doesn’t significantly effect the plot, barely exists, and when he is present his motives don’t make sense and his abilities are not foreshadowed at all (morphogenetic fields in 999 were good, the entire game was spent explaining the concept. Mind Hack? Right outta left field and also if we’re trying to make it work based on how morphogenetic field theory was explained in 999, the “reading minds” part of it is “extremely strong receiver”, and the “forcing people to do actions” part of it is “extremely strong transmitter”, so he should have one of the abilities but not both. And if he is a really strong transmitter.... he’s gotta mime out the action in order to write it into the fields to encourage others to follow! And I reckon natural transmitters, who are worse at receiving, are naturally slightly resistant to this, natural receivers are more vulnerable to this, and normal people somewhere in between. But yes, if Delta is gonna Mind Hacc Eric, then we should see him in the corner miming holding a gun, pointing, and firing!! Bleugh!

Wow that turned into a bit of a rant. Whoops?

3d: Rank the endings

I have been given the choice to either rank the true ends across the three games, or all the endings within a particular game. I am so bad at choices ugh.

Anyway, the true ends:

999 - it really tied everything together and explained everything. The sequence in the incinerator, seeing 12 year old Akane and 21 year old Junpei talking to each other, Junpei saving young Akane, Clover’s absolute joy at finding out Light is alive, the “he knew because I knew” thing that I mentioned above, just everything. It was a self contained story, so everything was addressed and it was good.

VLR - this is more second by default, since I love 999′s true end and hate ZTD’s true end. But overall, this is fairly solid, and I like the concept of them doing this in 2074 to change an outcome in 2028, but it loses points because it relies on ZTD to “complete” it

ZTD - I hate this true end. The game has very enjoyable moments, but unfortunately the true end amounts to “oh let’s just... SHIFT to a timeline where we all survive” and that’s it? Which just feels sort of pointless tbh. And is so unsatisfactory

Within 999, I feel all six five endings are extremely solid, and all have a part to play an a story to tell. Knife End may be the most unsatisfactory, but it’s still okay. True, Safe, and Sub Ends are the ends with credits, and they’re all full of great dialogue and story. Axe End is also great, and I love the way you get to see the other side of Clover (and I really like the art of Clover holding an axe, I actually drew it on Saturday (when I started writing these answers, but it’s Wednesday now because I’ve been busy) for a friend’s birthday, which is technically my first ZE fanart and I’ll post it here at. Some point. Knife end is a bit quick, but honestly that’s okay? Especially when considering how many bad ends the other two games have that aren’t even named. Coffin End was my first end, and I wasn’t expecting the “to be continued” so I basically just collapsed and lay face down on the ground for a fair bit, but again given how many plot locks the other games have, coffin end is chill. So 999 has the most solid endings overall.

Within VLR, there are nine named endings, one for each character, and 13 ish unnamed bad ends. The unnamed bad ends are all like.... basically as soon as you make the decision you die or whatever, they don’t continue onwards like they do for Axe End etc in 999. I like that the named endings are designed for you to learn about each character, even though some of them are kinda weak. Like Quark’s ending, we didn’t really learn about him, and most of what we learnt about him was from Tenmyouji’s ending. I agree with what you said, Finch, about how it would have been nice to get some more Quark content/bonding/something, after he wakes up. Clover’s ending was also pretty disappointing, since she vaguely alluded to 999 and then everyone killed themselves. But there were some really good ones, like Luna’s and K’s and Dio’s (very fun that Phi was about to smash his head with a rock even if betraying Luna to get to that point is painful). Actually I really like the whole murder mystery aspect of everything behind the Magenta door. 

Within ZTD, I do appreciate that the endings all served their purposes, but I disliked the way there were sometimes multiple endings in the same timeline, while other timelines... had none. It just was a bit all over the shop. Most of the endings were informative for the characters, but the true end sucks.

5e: Rant about something you liked from the games

I adore all the red/blue symbolism in the games, especially in 999. The way every time the morphogenetic field is described, the transmitters are red people and the receivers are blue people. And then when you learn who the espers are, you can see how the colours align. Clover is a transmitter, and her colour scheme is a lot of dark pink, close to red, while Light, a receiver, has lots of blue in his design. Junpei and Akane can both transmit and receive (with each other), and this is shown by Junpei wearing both red and blue, and Akane wearing purple, a mix of red and blue. It’s really neat. Also, Junpei is new to the morphogenetic fields, so his blue and red is still separate, but Akane is so entwined within them, and uses them so easily, that her blue and red have mixed to become purple.

In VLR, Clover is still pink, and Junpei still has blue (even though he’s lost the red, but that could show he’s lost connection to Akane and now has no one to transmit to, although I think it’s hilarious if he was still unintentionally transmitting to Akane over the years, and that’s how she kept tabs on him and found him again for VLR.

In ZTD, Diana is red and Sigma is blue. I actually headcanon Diana as a receiver and Sigma as a transmitter (as in, he transmitted his memories to himself across timelines rather than a natural receiver ability), so I like that in ZTD they have opposite colours/each other’s colours. Phi is blue in both games and still a receiver imo.

So the colour symbolism is obviously strongest in 999, but I really like it.

5f: Rant about something you disliked from the games

In VLR, Clover says that stronger espers absorb the powers of weaker espers, and that’s why she can’t contact her brother. I hate this “fact” actually, because it directly contradicts the way the morphogenetic fields work in 999 and ZTD, and also in VLR itself. In 999, we have nine sets of esper siblings during the First Nonary Game, and since they all survived, we know that their esper powers must have worked correctly.... which means we can’t have had one Super Esper absorbing all the powers. The true end of ZTD has the powers of all the espers working together to create a resonant effect so that even Eric and Mira, non espers, can SHIFT. I also dislike SHIFTing (a rant for another day), but the idea of multiple espers in a vicinity resonating/boosting everyone’s powers makes way more sense than.... one person absorbing everyone else’s powers.

And even within VLR.... Tenmyouji does the ally/betray swapsies thing with Sigma and Phi, which means he is also remembering another timeline.... which means his powers are still working and not being absorbed by Phi and Sigma. Also.... both Phi and Sigma are using their powers and SHIFTing everywhere. Why doesn’t one of them absorb the other’s powers? Also also, we learn in the True End that Akane was in K’s armour the entire time during the timeline where Sigma and Phi most use their powers for all the bomb passwords and locations etc. You cannot try to tell me that Akane isn’t the strongest esper, ever. She simply is. If absorbing was true, then we would literally never see anyone else use their powers, because Akane is always there (FNG, 999, VLR, ZTD) and would have to be doing all the absorbing. Gah.

So I reckon, even though Clover said that, that she was simply wrong. That was the current theory SOIS had, but.... they don’t have to be right.

In any case, there are other reasons why Clover might not have been able to contact Light in VLR. The first is simply that he is dead. Another is the idea that minds linked by the morphogenetic fields have a sort of... shape. That fits perfectly with those they are esper partners with. And as the espers grow, so do their mind shapes. Clover was frozen on the 22nd of December 2028, and awoke on the 25th of January 2074. Her mind shape was not able to evolve and grow, so it is preserved. Light however has been living those 45 years, which means that’s been a lot of time for his mind shape to grow and change. Clover can’t find Light’s mind in the morphogenetic field, since it no longer looks the same, and their shapes no longer fit together. This is my personal headcanon, and it means that when Clover finds him, their minds can get used to each other again and their shapes can align, and they can be linked again.

5n: Do you have any fanart/fanfic/fangame recommendations?

Boy, do I ever? The First Nonary Game by @airdeari . What it says on the tin, folks! Airdeari has named all nine pairs of siblings, and created unique sibling relationships and unique experiences with the morphogenetic field for all of them, and woven a beautiful story together, and it’s just wonderful. It’s my favourite fic ever, to the point where I literally bound it and it now exists as a physical book in my life. Like, I cannot recommend this fic enough, it is the best.

AO3 Summary: A tale of nine children aboard a sinking ship, and the unbelievable story of how they survived.

[amphtaminedreams]

The Women of Euphoria and Personal Style: Lookbook no.8

Hi to anyone reading,

I hope you’re well considering everything going on! It feels weird to want to talk about fashion or TV shows or red carpets or whatever when 90% of my Google searches are COVID-19 related but there you go. It’s all about trying to power through as normal (minus the social interaction) and pretend the world isn’t ending, right? Queue nervous laughter.

And as if things aren't shitty enough, production of season 2 of Euphoria has been postponed until further notice. 

Okay, in the grand scheme of things, having to wait a bit longer for a TV show isn’t catastrophic but it does just about sum up the transition from 2019 to 2020 thus far that after HBO redeemed itself by broadcasting Euphoria in the summer following an ending to Game of Thrones that has made the whole series unrewatchable, the glimmer of hope in me reignited by the prospect of series 2 this year has been quickly dashed. 2021, I’m rooting for you, because it doesn’t seem like things are getting better any time soon, and in all seriousness, I think everyone needs a break from the collective suffering of the last few months.

For me (and undoubtedly for many others if the hundreds of makeup looks and styling videos are anything to go by), Euphoria’s effect on the world of fashion and beauty is unprecedented. I really can’t recall a TV show in living memory that has had as much of an impact on the way young people dress. I mean, this might partially be because the style of the characters already kind of caters to and draws from the target audience but also, aside from Blair Waldorf did anybody really give THAT much of a fuck about what anybody in Gossip Girl wore?

The draw of the styling on Euphoria is that it has something for everyone. The style of each of the main girls, Rue, Kat, Maddy, Jules and Cassie, all of whom I’ve attempted (emphasis on attempted!) to base (emphasis on base!) outfits around, is varied and distinctive but still so current and realistic at the same time. It’s also consistent; even if you don’t own the specific pieces worn by any of them, similar shapes and details reoccur enough in different looks throughout the series that it’s not hard to create an outfit which matches your favourite character’s overall vibe without buying anything new. That’s kinda what I have attempted to do here and without further ado, I’m gonna get on with it! First up:

Jules (Played by Hunter Schafer)

When it comes to whose style is the most experimental, Jules is the obvious answer. A lot of her outfits are what I imagine a cartoonist in the near-distant future will envision their cool girl protagonist wearing. Whilst her ensembles are generally whimsical and girly for the most part, there’s usually a few slightly punk-ish finishing touches thrown in there too be it through chunky shoes or bold makeup or that incredible mesh trench coat she wears in the series finale with the trans symbol on the back which, honestly, deserves a moment of silence. 

There are definitely nods to current fashion trends sprinkled throughout her wardrobe too. I'm not going to lie, despite someone at work seemingly thinking it was an insult to tell me I look like someone who does (I still don’t know but this person has a Rick and Morty keyring so I don’t give it too much weight), I’ve never watched any anime. BUT, that being said, given the abundance of anime screenshots posted by all these aesthetic oriented Instagram and Tumblr moodboard accounts, I have a vague idea of what some of the more iconic characters look like and a lot of Jules’ looks seem to be very much modelled after or at least inspired by them. In a way, I see a lot of her looks as a blend between modern “e-girl”, Y2K skater chick (yes, I’m thinking early Avril Lavigne), and 2013 Tumblr “hipster” a la 2014 Joanna Kutcha and Charlie Barker, and though on paper that sounds like a nightmare combination, it works. I know-if that sentence were a Depop description I would’ve just gained 30 followers.

When it comes to my own interpretation of Jules’ style, it’s definitely something I like to channel when I’m putting together a proper OUTFIT outfit. Meaning an outfit I actually put effort into and thus will most likely want to get a good photo in, lol. The way her character dresses is almost quite Christopher Kane in that it’s fresh and unusual but still understated enough that I wouldn’t walk into a room wearing any of these feeling like I’m doing a Rick Owens runway.

I’m not TOO far out of my comfort zone but still at the same time, I’d be trying something new and maybe a little bit more zany than I'm used to. As for noting where any of these pieces are from, only a few have been bought in the last 6 months, but from left to right clockwise I have marked out those that have in case they’re still available (though be wary of the fact that it seems a lot of online clothes stores are still forcing warehouse employees to work in close confines at the moment and so perhaps aren’t operating the most ethically):

LOOK 1

Corset-Jaded London

Shoes-TK Maxx

LOOK 2

Dress-Motel Rocks

Boots-Koi Vegan Footwear

LOOK 3

Dress-Jaded London

LOOK 4

Dress-Jaded London

Beret-Ebay

LOOK 5

Beret-Ebay

LOOK 6

Mesh Top-Depop

Hair Clips-Urban Outfitters

Kat (Played by Barbie Ferreira) 

Eurgh, Kat. 

I LOVE THIS BITCH.

If I had to choose my favourite character in the show, it would be a very close toss-up between her and Rue, and though I think Rue might just about nab the top spot for her relatability factor, Kat is the girl I want to be or wish that I had been when I was at school. I mean, there’s definitely an argument to be made in that a lot of what she’s doing with her cam work could be seen as a means of validation (Sam Levinson has basically said everyone on the show has some kind of an unhealthy coping mechanism and I would guess due to the circumstances in which her cam girl career was borne and the fact she’s underage, this would be hers) but I do think in other ways we really see Kat reclaim her power and recognise herself for the smart, capable, gorgeous woman that she is. Honestly, the definition of divine feminine energy, and I would completely let Barbie Ferreira/basically Kat if she was also actually 23 dominate me.

Plus! Her! Style! Is! The! Bomb! Definitely the easiest character to base looks around because if I’m totally honest Kat’s energy is pretty much just what I want to emulate in every day life. 

It’s either pieces that are typically feminine, cutesy, and even slightly preppy at times drenched in everything grunge OR vice versa where you have something semi-gothic and then add a colourful, more playful touch in there that harks back to the beginning of the series before Kat had began to explore her identity and sexuality and dressed slightly more Forever 21.

I’d say, not yet with my whole chest, that on a good day the outfits I put together when making an effort aren’t too far off something Kat would wear, minus the more overtly BDSM touches; if wearing a ring choker in London is enough to get me a creepy comment from a gross middle aged shopkeeper (because I apparently forfeited my right not to be perved on when I decided to buy a bottle of Oasis summer fruits), then you can only imagine the kind of looks wearing a full-on harness would get in my conservative OAP dominated hometown. Not the most doable right now, especially considering the only time I get out is to work and to go for a run. The chafing I could deal with but the horrified glares of pensioners whose M&S prawn mayo sandwiches I’ve ruined by simply being in their eyesight not so much.

LOOK 1-

Corset-Urban Outfitters

LOOK 2-

Bodysuit-Depop

Skirt-Zara

Harness-Ebay

LOOK 3-

Co-ord-Depop

Lace-up Corset-Missguided

LOOK 4-

Dress-Vintage

LOOK 5-

Belt-Ebay

LOOK 6-

Coat-Topshop

Dress-Jaded London

LOOK 7-

Fishnet Top-Ebay

Skirt-Urban Outfitters

Maddy (Played by Alexa Demie)

Not gonna lie, I was kind of scared to do Maddy. I’m scared to be posting this, lol! Alexa Demie has played this character for a single season and she’s already one of the most iconic women to grace our screens in years. This is a huge undertaking and I don’t have the bank balance or the body confidence (lmao) to raid IAmGia. 

And this is where I want to stress: THESE ARE NOT OUTFIT RECREATIONS. THESE ARE INSPIRED BY. I HAVE ADDED ELEMENTS OF MY OWN STYLE INTO THEM. PLEASE DON’T DRAG ME. I KNOW, I’M NOT ALEXA DEMIE. I WOULD NEVER ASSUME TO BE ALEXA DEMIE. I’M NOT ABOUT TO TAKE THE LORD’S NAME IN VAIN LIKE THAT. So now we’ve got that out the way (wipes bead of sweat off forehead), let’s continue. 

Everything about Maddy Perez is extra. She has very much been established as a centre of attention character, and her outfits are a key part of that. They’re daring, they’re hyper-feminine, and they are always glamorous. We’re told that she competed in beauty pageants when she was younger and it’s clear that level of excess and coordination and glitz and all-round-boujeeness wormed its way into her DNA during that time. Even the “depression” outfit she wears to school following Nate becoming violent at the fair is costume-like, a 2019 Bratz doll Off-White street style collaboration.

Do you know how HARD I had to try to be HOT!? For these photos. Alexa Demie is one of those blessed women who doesn’t have to try at all, and that translates into the character completely. At any given moment, Maddy could add or remove one item or clothing and be let straight into the VIP section of a club, and that, honestly, is inspiring to us all in these dark times. 

One thing I tried to keep in mind is that she always looks polished and coordinated, I.E the kind of look I would prepare for a night out is something Maddy would wear on an average day. Co-ords and delicate prints seem to be more subtle wardrobe staples along with mesh and PVC and glitter and feathers and fur and basically anything that toes the line between expensive looking and tacky. Yes, I am aware we may toe different sides of that line but please let me stay delusional and believe that’s not the case for 5 minutes. Much appreciated xoxo

LOOK 1-

Bodysuit-Jaded London

LOOK 2-

Bralette-Depop

LOOK 3-

Co-ord Suit-Boohoo

Bodysuit-Boohoo

LOOK 4-

Dress-Motel Rocks

Shoes-Schuh

LOOK 5-

Bodysuit-Zaful

Trousers-Depop

Coat-Topshop

LOOK 6-

Dress-Zaful

Belt-Zaful

LOOK 7-

Top-Jaded London

Hair Clips-H&M

Rue (Played by Zendaya Coleman)

I have a complicated relationship with Rue as a character. When I started season 1 of Euphoria, I was like “Oh my god, this girl is the worst. Jesus, she’s so negative and draining and willingly self-destructive and-”

Then, oh my god is this what it’s like to live with me!?

I will say, to my own credit, that I don’t think I've ever been quite as hard to deal with as Rue (a lot less smashing stuff up and a lot more moping), and to HER credit, by the end of the season we come to realise she’s been through a fucking lot and so it makes sense, but wow. I don’t think I have ever seen a teen show handle drug abuse and mental illness in such a brutal way. It’s quite a talent to be able to show a character cause so much pain to those closest to them and yet do so through a sympathetic lens. And issues aside, whether it’s her occasional social awkwardness or her relationship with her family or watching bloody Love Island (still quite surreal to see Zendaya Coleman witnessing the Amy/Curtis drama unfold), Rue is just my favourite character to follow. 

Her style, though. AH. The thing is, I can hardly drag it, because it’s pretty much what I wear when I’m moping about the house-or just any time I can get away with it to be honest-to a T. I want to stay true to character, but that being said, creating a “Seth Rogen”-esque outfit that’s worth posting on here is difficult. So, with the same kind of artistic license that had me wearing berets whilst cosplaying Maddy Perez, here is the best I could do:

I know, I know, it’s probably too much colour and jewellery for Rue but this is as toned down as I could do and I tried to stick with the key silhouettes we see from her throughout the season; I mean, I can’t see her wearing leopard print but the structure of the coat in outfit 1 is very similar to the one seen in Shook Ones pt.II. I think the bottom line when it comes to her character is keeping things effortless and not overly-feminine; you want to mix street style, athleisure and your dad’s wardrobe favourites like your life depends on it. Plus messy hair and smudged makeup, both of which I’ve already got down according to the completely inappropriate number of customers who’ve asked if I'm tired at work so thanks for that guys, and glitter tears. Lots and lots of glitter tears.

OUTFIT 1-

Dungarees-Vintage

OUTFIT 2-

Trousers-Depop

Cardigan-Urban Outfitters

OUTFIT 5-

Beanie-Depop

OUTFIT 6-

Shirt-Boohoo Man

Sports Bra-TK Maxx

Trousers-Urban Outfitters

OUTFIT 7-

Shirt-Jaded London

Cassie (Played by Sydney Sweeney)

Style-wise, Cassie is a hard one. When putting outfits for her character together, I found myself gravitating towards a direction that’s probably a bit too bohemian for her character, under the guidance of loose terms like “girl-next-door”, “floaty”, “delicate”, you get the idea. She definitely feels the least fully-realised in terms of all the main girls and I think it’s fair to say she’s probably got a bit of self-discovery to do. Most of her storylines in the season are dictated by her relationships to other people: McKay, Maddy, Lexie, her parents and so on. 

Nevertheless, I tried to stick to the airier, more traditionally “pretty” pieces whilst still channelling the confidence and ease with which Cassie pulls them off. Sydney Sweeney has the most incredible figure and I feel like whilst the clothes the on-set stylists put her in flatter that and don’t hide anything, they’re still the focus. It doesn’t feel like there’s anything more inherently sexual about her character than any of the other main female characters despite the way the men within the narrative view her, and I think it’s a testament to the the wardrobe department that to me she still gives off big modern Disney princess energy and a certain innocence even whilst we hear her being continuously sexualised by her male peers. 

If anything, Cassie probably dresses the most like an actual teenage girl, and her style, whilst less distinctive than the other girls, still does a good job of capturing the youth and romanticism of her character. 

The colour palette of her wardrobe tends to be quite neutral, with a couple of pastels thrown in there, and if there are any details, they’re usually quite dainty. Similarly, Cassie is probably the least experimental when it comes to her makeup; we don’t really see her wearing the bold eyeshadows or liners or gems like the other girls at any point.

OUTFIT 1-

Bodysuit-Motel Rocks

Hair Clips-Bershka

OUTFIT 2-

Dress-Jaded London

OUTFIT 3-

Trousers-Urban Outfitters

OUTFIT 4-

Top-Urban Outfitters

Hairband-H&M

`OUTFIT 5-

Top-Urban Outfitters

Jeans-Zaful

Headband-Primark

OUTFIT 6-

Top-Urban Outfitters

OUTFIT 7-

Dress-Urban Outfitters

Hair Clips-Boohoo

SO, I guess that’s it for my Euphoria lookbook! As always, let me know what you think (nicely pls, my ego is fragile lol) and I’d love to hear your opinions on the show too! I really haven’t got this excited over a new TV show in ages and I just think that it does everything so excellently-from the writing to the cinematography to the soundtrack, you can tell each element is so carefully and purposefully constructed. It immerses you into the dramatic highs and lows of being a teenager in a way I haven’t seen since UK Skins and I never thought I’d watch a show which held a candle to that. 

In terms of what I’m doing next, I’ve got a very delayed fashion week masterpost in the works as well as something to fill the Met Gala shaped hole in our lives, which I hope to get up over the next couple of weeks. In the meantime, if you read to the end, THANK YOU! And I hope you’re staying safe and AT HOME where possible. I know this self-isolation feels never-ending and if I’m honest, it is having a hugely negative effect on my mental health, but NHS staff are doing their very best with the shitty recourses they have and whilst it seems that our government have thrown workers under the bus once again, we can all do our bit to combat that by slowing the spread of the virus. Also thank you to anybody who’s out working now in such a scary and uncertain time! I work at a grocery store and can say from experience that the best way to show this thanks is just through kindness and following employee’s instructions without giving them grief for it. Everyone’s scared right now and the best we can do is pull together and look out for each other, as difficult as that might seem at times.

Anyway, sorry for the ramble, and like I said, stay safe! Thanks once again if you read til the end or even if you’re just here for the photos. Appreciate it more than you know either way!

Lauren x

[level247-table-tech]

here are the sprites on their own! not all of them, but there are way too many to fit up there. i’m leaving the rest under the cut.

others include significantly asymmetrical sprites, as well as a bonus set. 8)

these don’t really clarify their relative heights. they are not adjusted to the bottom pixel i actually drew for sure, that’s not how i aligned them. i actually have a guideline in the file, but. i can’t really show that.

above are the regular sprites. it took ages to figure out what i wanted to do with virgil’s plaid, but it turned out going simple with it was the best plan. also it looked very bad until i figured out to use values correctly.

also, while we’re at it, i can tell you some things i changed between projects! this is a remaster of my last attempt at pixelology, and i do  believe it’s an overall improvement.

virgil’s plaid, yeah, changed that, but also the colour of his hair, because the old one blended too much with his skin. glad that happened to virgil, because i was trying to keep the hair highlights the same for everyone, with differently-tinted shadows. i did give him a bat instead of the wings this time, because a, he seems like a bat kind of guy, and b, the wings sucked and i don’t think i could improve them. like, the best thing about those wings is that they were the ace flag colours, and since his general colour scheme is already like that, it’s not a spectacular saving grace. they also made the frame fit weird, but i don’t like drawing wings absurdly small, like why bother? i alos tried to be a bit more competent with the jacob lines in his shading. those are an indicator of fear so of course i wanted to keep them included, but last time i feel like i didn’t do great, and this time i think i improved. especially on the legs. it is kind of a pain how there are adjacent sections where the shadows are done in the same colour, but. that’s really who virgil is, let’s be real. wouldn’t be the same without the all-black clothes.

also, patton’s different skin tones were really bad, you could barely see the shadows, so i changed them. his overall shape also did not work, so this time i stylized it a bit more to fit with the pixels. also i gave him a different weapon. hopefully it’s still funny in its incongruity!

roman had very little change. like, i really like his original sprite! i did change some of the gold details, but the biggest thing is probably the pants. they’re white with a red stripe because, a, it looks very good, and b, it set up a parallel with remus.

and remus. most obviously in the first one, his different head angle super didn’t work. it was very bad! which, in his case doesn’t automatically rule it out, but this one looks way better next to the majority of these. i mentioned relative heights earlier and this one should actually be the same height as roman, you can align them by their chins. aside from that, i added a lot mor detail to his ruffles, i tried my best to maintain clarity on his torso, i got the sleeves just plain wrong, but it looks fine, and it happened to be very good art that led me astray on that, so whatever. i feel like his morningstar might have gotten worse between versions, but what can you do. maybe i accidentally put it at a slightly harder angle to make look nice. whatever.

logan! i don’t think i’m doing these in any real order, sorry. like patton, his shape has been changed to be more stylized to fit the pixel thing. like, a realistic taper on the legs, as it turns out, looks pretty bad! exaggerate it or make it just straight lines and it is better. i feel like i very much improved his hair, and i also added the belt that he wears which i forgot last time.

lastly, janus. well, lastly for now, but the next one won’t be a remaster of anything. i gave him his canon weapon instead of snakes, which, not sure what i was thinking gameplay-wise for those. [that’s a lie, i was thinking nothing about gameplay because i am no gamemaker. i’m not even an animator, much as i’d like to be.] when i made his last sprite, i forgot the lining of his cape is yellow. also last time i had not seen the magnificent longer cape from the game sections of svsr, which as i’ve mentioned elsewhere i am never letting go of, ever. so that features here. it kind of blends with the backgrounds i use for the vs character selection screens, but i don’t think that’s necessarily a downside. aside from that, i did remove some scales from his right hand because we have now seen it, and it’s proven bereft of those. as you’ll see in a second though, fortunately no such thing can be said of his legs. nor upper arm.

now for the bonus set. you may recognize this theme if you’ve followed this project awhile. 8)

some notes on these specifically:

-this is simply a complete set based on janus’ bonus sprite from the original project this is remastering.

-i tried to base the colours on their onesies. that proved harder than expected. remus and janus have no shown onesies, but

>i had janus’ previous sprite on hand, so that was him taken care of.

>virgil’s onesie didn’t really have multiple colours, so it’s just different shades of black, with some grey thrown in because white is already a base colour.

>logan’s, oh boy, i thought i remembered it having two colours, but i was wrong, it is just blue. and white, but again, that doesn’t work. so i gave him a couple of shades.

>patton’s, i didn’t really want to use grey as a colour, but it actually had two others, they were just in trace amounts. it was okay.

>remus. nghh. i wanted to use like, an inverted version of roman’s colours, but it turns out blue and yellow inverted is yellow and blue. so i used the orthogonal colours instead, and i’m not really sure it was a good look.

-aside from colour schemes, each of these has its own little variation, because i felt like having fun. aside from any kind of socks/leggings, because whatever, those are pretty variable anyway, each has one detail different. from most to least noticeable as i see it:

>patton has pants instead of a skirt. i just thought the look suited him better. the thing about patton is i always imagine him in Dad Fashion, which doesn’t have a ton of skirts in my mind. maybe that’s just my dad, but eh. i do think it’s a good look but i didn’t draw it very well.

>roman has a different crown. need i explain further? adding the others’ crowns was a bit of a pain considering how they interact with hair that isn’t drawn in anime style.

>virgil’s might not be too noticeable on its own, but the leggings kind of direct the eye there. he’s wearing his own boots instead of any variety of sailor scout ones. mostly because they are much, much cooler.

>logan has a different collar. closer to his usual polo than... whatever the sailor collar is actually called. he also might not have the same choker necklace as everyone else, but mostly you just can’t tell. still tied with a weird bow thing, though. how the hell do those bow accessories work?

>janus has a longer cape. again, need i explain further? he’s also the only one with a magical girl wand, because his colour scheme* was the most permitting and i really wanted to draw coily ribbons.

>remus is kind of like virgil with the leggings, but again, those don’t count, and with remus they draw attention away from his change. anyways, the different thing about his outfit is the sleeves. i only noticed long after i was out of the pixel stage that none of the sleeves are accurate, but his are even more not accurate, they do the poof thing. also his neckline’s a bit lower, but i mean, how could i not?

-i might assemble a full scene with these, if anybody asks. or nobody, i kinda just want to. it’s not too much trouble, but it won’t be animated this time, that took ages and i don’t think it even turned out well. i gotta find somewhere to actually get taught things about animation, though it also just does not gel with my medium.

-i can’t for most of these, but for janus i can talk about some improvements. his crown looks more visible, though that might just be compared to this side of his face. the skirt is not better and might be worse to be honest. also the bow on his chest. other than that it’s definitely better for the gloves actually being incorporated in this one.

*i do actually have set colour schemes for these. i tried to even limit the number of colours for each one. that said, most of them have exactly 17 instead of the nice power of two 16, and one of them couldn’t even fit that bill.

[crystal-moon-101]

My redesigns for this popular trio!

The Secret Generator 10 (Or Celebrity Trio but that doesn’t really work for me because of Zak...) I’ve been meaning to get around to doing this, since I am really fond of these three boys. With Zak and Rex both being part of my top two shows of all time. Sorry Ben....

-Zak Saturday-

He was the most fun working with. His warm colour palette isn’t something I work with often, but I think I did alright. He also as some small details you might notice, like the fangs, eyes and scales.

Notes:

14 Years Old

5′5 (Will only grow to be 5′8. Which confuses him since both sides of his family have very tall genes. Ulraj pokes fun at him, saying all that height is going towards his ‘Kur Form’)

Dead on the inside.

Aggressively Pansexual

His human side has been growing reptilian features. Noticeable fangs, scales growing around his lower neck, around his chest and upper back/shoulders, pure orange eyes with pupils that can become thin slits and a slight forked tongue. 

Even also displays some reptile behaviour. E.g, soaking up sunlight on a rock, alert nature, able to stand still as a statue. (He’s done these things since he was young. His parents just thought it was something he picked up from Komodo.)

The light that forms around his eyes when using his powers have darkened the skin around his eyes. (Suggested by my friend)

He is oddly thin and lanky, but it’s often hard to see because of the baggy clothes he wears.

That being said, he’s a lot stronger than you think he is. Can easily lift people twice his size.

Constantly has to get new hair ties. They keep breaking because 1. Every time his powers cause all of his hair to flow, the tie snaps. 2. Working out in the wild, it keeps getting snagged by tree branches or slipping off when he tumbles downhills.

While quiet and casual outside of battles, he will become a lot like his mother on the field.

Has freckles from his maternal side. His mother doesn’t have them, but Doyle does.

Will casually mention his ridiculously and scary adventures like they’re nothing, not because he’s bragging, but because he truly doesn’t understand what normal really is.

So use to being grabbed by the scruff of his shirt that he will always go limp when you grab him like that, much like a baby animal. 

While he can act very eerie and strange, he’s a very sweet and understanding guy. 

That being said, he can be hella scary when he wants to be.

Don’t mess with his family or he will send an army of Grootslangs to your house.

Still trying to figure out his placement in life and what Kur was really meant to be.

After being taught by his family and uncle, he went to Tsul 'Kalu to be his new mentor.

-Rex Salazar-

I think I changed him the least, but I added extra details and made his shirt, pants and shoes into a one-piece suit. It always baffles me how he can pull off this colour scheme so well.

And while I didn’t draw it here. I would definitely make his pure EVO form a lot smaller. Make him come across more like a monstrous zombie robot thing. The reason why is because those EVO forms he had just felt like they belonged to different shows, like transformers. A more creature design would fit better, I feel.

Notes:

16 Years Old

6′1 (Will grow to be 6′5. Yeeeeeee, he’s a big guy.)

Lady killer~

Best wingman and even offers pretend dates to help you.

Can always hear and feel the technology around him. Strange to everyone else, but he’s learnt to live with it. Even comes in handy when trying to find a good wifi connection.

Knows when to cut the bullcrap.

He does have a bit of a science brain, but he uses it differently than his family had.

Constantly jumping between worlds. Sometimes even tossed by someone.

Talks in his sleep, mostly reciting nanite binary coding.

Lonely lad and child solider, great mix, right?...

Goes all out with holidays. He once, somehow, got real snow in Providence. No one knows how to this day.

Hates lightening.

Has nearly called Holiday and Six mum and dad multiple times.

Has a lot more abilities he has yet to discover. (Including turning people EVO.)

Never asked for any of this, but, eh, what ya gonna do

Is always overexcited when doing normal things. (Werids out Noah a lottt.)

You’re endangered if he decided to use his full raw power. (Key signs to look out for is a large amount of circuit patterns covering him, glowing eyes, tips of his hair glowing too, sharp metal growths and technology around you flashing like crazy.)

Loves Imagine Dragon.

Sharp eyelashes.

Just wants hugs, give him hugs!

Always frustrated when someone from his past tries talking to him about the past. Sometimes he wonders if people forget.

Skilled drawer and smooth singer.

Has an EVO pet (Her name is Siri, Btw)

Some have compared him to being a living, breathing nanite. 

Eager to have family game nights! “Poker doesn’t count, Bobo...”

Once had a malfunction, his whole body was out of wack. (Noah laughs about it and even has some recordings, much to Rex’s dismay.)

Has a civilian outfit that Noah put together. (He refuses to take off his goggles, however.) 

-Ben Tennyson-

Now, I already made a redesign for him, along with Gwen, Julie and Kevin (Both for teen and kid versions). I used the same look, just adjusted some details and colours.

Notes:

15 Years Old

5′9 (And he stays that height. He peaked in height very young, but stop growing quickly. This does annoy him.)

Dumbass with bad impulse control.

Even he’s confused by how he keeps attracting women.

Had a rather lonely childhood with many bullies. (It’s why he often seeks attention, he’s afraid of being alone and forgotten again.)

It’s also what made him jealous of Gwen when they were young. Most treated her like the better of the two.

Pretty crap at sharing his feelings. He would rather play it off as a jerk, then go and drown himself in smoothies...

A secret momma’s boy. “Benny Bear” As his mother likes to call him.

Has an interesting dynamic with Azmuth. Despite their arguments, they balance each other well. Others have even seen them taking care of each other (Almost like father and son), but the pair will always deny this and say it’s ‘strictly’ professional.

 Surprisingly great with kids. (This was truly noticed when seen around his 14 baby chills.)

In the future, he will have a nasty wound on the battlefield, which will result in the Omnitrix becoming his new arm and merging with him.

When he takes thing seriously, you know shits going down!

Has a german shepherd name Boston.

 Likes to call Vilgax ‘Calamari’.

Has grown to be close to most Tennyson members. (E.G Camille, who was actually his babysitter after she joined the family.)

He doesn’t like peacocks after...an incident at the zoo. His mother still apologizes to this day.

Decent singer and very skilled at the guitar. 

Has picked up combat moves from Tetrax.

Has always felt like he’s nothing without the watch. Others have said otherwise.

He knows how to speak certain alien languages, Galvan being one of them.

His schedule is a nightmare, because something is always popping up that involves him. This means he sometimes forgets to eat, sleep or even wash. It’s why he’s often caught napping.

Sometimes wonders if he’s human or alien at this point, maybe something else entirely. 

Very soft poofy hair.

Is hated by almost all his villains. He just loves pissing them off.

[zenonaa]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Dangan Ronpa 3: The End of 希望ヶ峰学園 | The End of Kibougamine Gakuen | End of Hope's Peak High School, Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Fukawa Touko/Togami Byakuya, Naegi Makoto & Togami Byakuya Characters: Togami Byakuya, Naegi Makoto Additional Tags: togafukaweek2020 Series: Part 4 of TogaFuka Week 2020

Summary: Togami enlists Naegi's help to practice what Togami should say to Fukawa when they reunite in Towa City.

Comments: Day 4! This time, it’s one prompt - thanks. However, it can be interpreted as a nightmare for Naegi.

***

The elevator door opened with a groan. Makoto emerged into the corridor, dressed in his work suit at Future Foundation’s main headquarters on a Saturday, as opposed to in his casual clothes playing video games at his apartment with Yasuhiro like he originally planned. Since passing through the main entrance on the ground floor, he had not seen a single person. Not heard a single voice. No one greeted him at the reception desk or galloped up or down the stairs nearby, and he couldn’t hear anything beyond the door that led to the offices on this floor.

Part of healing included rest, and as the world was finally healing now, Future Foundation allowed employees to have weekends off. Yet, despite that and the eerie silence around him, Makoto knew someone else was here, on this very floor, waiting for him.

Makoto exhaled and approached the door to the other offices. He stopped in front of it and extended his hand, but he didn’t open it, hovering his hand next to it. His faint reflection stared back at him from the door’s glass pane. Over the years, Makoto imprinted many faces onto many reflective surfaces. Bright-eyed, optimistic faces. Angry, determined faces. Tired, haunted faces.

The one peering back now was tired, but optimistic.

He looked up, breathed and opened the door.

Wooden caramel panels covered the floor. Either side of Makoto, framed photographs and motivational posters claimed any available space on the white walls. Though he hadn’t been on this floor many times before, most had the same layout. Makoto walked down the corridor until he reached a door with a symbol of someone wearing a dress on it then went inside, where he immediately found himself face-to-face with his colleague, Byakuya Togami.

A fan whirred over their heads, already in action. Same with the lights. The bathroom had been refurbished, more colourful than the understated monochrome schemes on other floors. Both the floor and the ceiling were tiled in white, and the furthest wall from Makoto boasted pastel pink. Sinks stood to his left, each garnished with a rosy bar of soap despite the dispensers above them all, and the dispensers were fixed onto mirrors that took up the entirety of that wall. 

Byakuya clicked his tongue. Makoto’s eyes flitted back to him.

“You’re five minutes late,” said Byakuya, arms folded over his chest.

His glare weighed down on Makoto, who tensed and rubbed the back of his neck.

“Sorry, I got here as fast as I could,” replied Makoto, slapping on an apologetic smile. He lowered his hand slowly and squinting slightly, added, “But if we live in the same apartment block, wouldn’t it have been easier to meet at your place instead?”

As opposed to the girls’ bathroom on the eighth floor of Future Foundation’s main building.

“No,” said Byakuya with a small shake of his head. “I don’t want to risk us being overheard, and I know for a fact this bathroom doesn’t have any hidden cameras. Andou made a big deal of it during a meeting, and the memory stuck with me.”

When Byakuya phoned Makoto the night before, he had refused to divulge to Makoto what this sudden meeting was about, only referring to it as ‘important’ and saying that he couldn’t tell anyone else about it. Makoto didn’t disbelieve him, but he hadn’t realised how many precautions Byakuya put in place so their conversation would remain confidential.

The quiver of a smile on Makoto’s lips flatlined. This must have been serious. More serious than Makoto realised.

Byakuya pushed up his glasses. Jutted out his chin.

“As you will know, in a week, we are being flown to Towa City to retrieve two of our friends,” said Byakuya, prompting Makoto to give a nod, and Byakuya wagged a finger. “You are going because one of them is your sister. Now, you must wonder why I am going too. Why I insisted on it.”

Not really. That was what Makoto wanted to say, and what he almost said. Byakuya twitched his finger one more time, then left it pointing vaguely in Makoto’s direction.

“It is because of Fukawa,” said Byakuya. He paused. Stared. Waited.

Makoto felt obligated to respond.

“... Right,” said Makoto, eyeing him. That seemed like a safe answer. He already suspected that to be Byakuya’s reason, but he didn’t know what Byakuya would steer the conversation to from here.

“You see,” Byakuya carried on, and he now clasped his hands together tightly and bobbed them up and down, his index fingers the only digits pointing outward, “when I collect Fukawa, there are a few things I wish to address with her. I want to commend her for her efforts during our separation, as well as the previous period which I failed to acknowledge prior to her departure, and I want to discuss plans for what is to happen next.”

He stopped moving his hands, staring at Makoto intensely.

“Uh... okay?” said Makoto, and he scratched his temple. “Is that what you wanted to tell me?”

A tremor convulsed on Byakuya’s face. His features darkened as he gritted his teeth.

“Don’t get passive aggressive with me. If you don’t wish to assist me, come out and say it. I will remember, though,” warned Byakuya.

Makoto winced and patted the air. “S-Sorry! I mean, I would be glad to help. So what is it you want my help with?”

The cold glint in Byakuya’s eyes lingered as he straightened and adjusted his glasses. He placed one hand onto his hip.

“I will recite what I plan to say to Fukawa, and you will advise me on any amendments I should make,” said Byakuya. “Even though I have become more considerate of people’s feelings, no switch has flicked within me and I may say something too harsh. I also don’t want to say something that Fukawa might misunderstand. You know how her imagination can run wild...”

Once Makoto processed what Byakuya requested from him, a grin broke out across Makoto’s face. Makoto couldn’t imagine Byakuya wanting to practice so as to avoid accidentally hurting someone’s feelings when they first met.

“I would be happy to help you with that,” Makoto said, nodding. “All right, you start.”

Byakuya positioned his fist to his mouth and cleared his throat, then moved his hand away, his expression serious.

“Fukawa, at first, you irritated me and I wished for you to disappear, but over the years, I came to know you better and no longer want that to happen,” said Byakuya.

Makoto frowned. Already, he thought it could do with some work. 

However, Makoto didn’t say anything yet, because Byakuya stared into space with the same level of focus one would direct at a person they were talking to, so Makoto thought Byakuya had more to say. Advice could come afterwards, when Byakuya was finished. Byakuya began pacing back and forth, waving one hand about as he spoke.

“As time went by, you seeped into my subconscious. I began to think about you when I had nothing else to think about,” Byakuya revealed. He cupped his chin and slowed his pace, but he didn’t stop walking, his steps turning to shuffling. “Then, I thought about you when I was supposed to be thinking about other things. Even now, my mind still strays to you without my intention. I have come to... acknowledge that you play a significant role in my life.”

Byakuya came to a halt. A beat of silence passed between them. The body language of the two men differed greatly. While Byakuya stood stiffly with his jaw clenched and his lips pressed together, Makoto’s mouth hung ajar. He didn’t know how to respond, but fortunately for him, Byakuya resumed speaking.

“You are an enigma, and now that we are back together, I will keep a close eye on you,” said Byakuya quietly, edging close to a murmur. “I wish to learn more about you. I want you by my side. Thank you.”

The ceiling fan hummed. Rattled faintly. Byakuya turned to Makoto.

“Well? What do you think?” asked Byakuya, his voice returning to its usual volume.

Makoto shifted his weight between his feet.

“Are... Is this a love confession?” blurted Makoto.

Byakuya twitched.

“No! I am thanking her,” Byakuya snapped. “This is nothing like a love confession.”

If his gaze was a knife, it would have cut right through Makoto.

“S-Sorry!” yelped Makoto. He threw his hands up, showing his palms in surrender, and added timidly, “It sounds kind of like one though, Togami-kun.”

“Well, it’s not one,” replied Byakuya with a small jerk of his head. His brow scrunched then relaxed a bit, but not much. In a tight, level voice, he said, “No matter. I have, of course, prepared another speech, in case you found fault in this one.”

Of course he did. Byakuya pulled out a piece of paper from his jacket pocket, skimmed through it, then spoke again.

“Fukawa, we have been through a lot together, haven’t we?” he asked. Neither Makoto nor the room answered. That didn’t deter Byakuya, whose voice spread throughout the bathroom. “When we first met, I thought I had you sussed out, but you have continued to surprise me. I realise you are not just a stuttering girl with a persecution complex, but a stuttering girl with a persecution complex that is brave, intelligent, resourceful, attractive and incredibly loyal. You have proven yourself to be an invaluable asset to me, and with you by my side, we can look to the future together. Thank you.”

Byakuya faced him again.

“Thoughts?” he said calmly.

Makoto braced himself and said hesitantly, “Togami-kun... that also sounded like a love confession.”

“How so?” asked Byakuya, narrowing his eyes.

“How...?” Makoto repeated blankly. He flung up his hands and couldn’t help raise his voice. “All of it, Togami-kun! You even called her ‘attractive’!”

Byakuya’s eyes flashed wider, and he turned his head to one side. “... No, I didn’t.”

If this had been a written story, Makoto could have pointed to the word ‘attractive’ in Byakuya’s recent dialogue, but he couldn’t, so he folded his arms over his chest and hunched his shoulders, pouting.

“I shall now recite my third version,” announced Byakuya, sticking his nose up. Makoto stared.

“T-Third...?” Makoto spluttered.

Either Byakuya ignored Makoto or took this exclamation as a sound of consent. He got out yet another piece of paper from his pocket and unfolded it. Then he glared at Makoto, like he expected Makoto to interrupt, and when Makoto didn’t, Byakuya glanced at it before speaking yet again.

“I have been meaning to confess my feelings to you for a long time now,” said Byakuya, chin held high. “For a long time, I took you for granted, and during your long absence in Towa City, I realised how much I came to not only be used to having you at my disposal but also how much I approved, no, desired your presence.”

By this point, Makoto couldn’t even muster up any emotion to liven his face. He didn’t even wish that the tiles above and below him would splinter, become teeth, and swallow him up. All he did was stand there, motionless.

Meanwhile, Byakuya remained unperturbed. Carried on with his speech, gesturing passionately.

“I remember your dark grey eyes and how they would follow me around the room, how they danced in and out of view behind your glasses so befitting a literary girl.”

The only indication of life from Makoto was how his eyes tracked Byakuya’s movements around the room. It wasn’t that Makoto wasn’t happy for the guy. The opposite was true. Makoto just didn’t know how much more of this he could take. Of Byakuya being so oblivious to something so painfully obvious to Makoto. Byakuya paused from his pacing and gazed up at his elevated hand, palm up and fingers splayed like he was grasping the globe.

“What once unsettled, annoyed me... now gives me reassurance. Security. This is because I know you would be my knight,” said Byakuya. His fingers closed in to create a fist. “Your long, aubergine hair, once tied in braids, now flies wild and unkempt, framing your pale face in a stark contrast between light and dark... You, once a wallflower, now a rose, demanding attention from all those present...”

Byakuya trailed off, standing as still as a statue. Makoto didn’t know if Byakuya was finished yet but dared not ask.

“... I have been able to see your face on video call, but you were intangible,” continued Byakuya. Good call by Makoto. Byakuya spoke barely above a whisper. “But now, if I wanted, I could bring my hands to your hair... comb my fingers through your hair... cradle your cheeks in my hands...”

The guy had it bad.

“Togami-kun,” said Makoto, unable to refrain any longer.

As if the vision of Touko that only Byakuya could see suddenly fractured, freeing him from his trance, Byakuya turned to Makoto sharply. “What?”

“This really sounds like a confession,” said Makoto.

“It’s not!” insisted Byakuya.

Makoto wanted to shake him. Instead, he dragged his fingers down his own face. “You’re talking about combing your fingers through her hair and caressing her face...”

“Theoretically,” said Byakuya.

“What?” asked Makoto, gaping, and Byakuya fidgeted with his glasses.

“I’m saying I theoretically could,” explained Byakuya. He brought a hand to his chin. His gaze drifted upward, clouding in thought. “I could also nudge her glasses into place, or even... touch her... hand...”

Byakuya stroked his thumb against his chin. Makoto laced his fingers together and shook his hands pleadingly at Byakuya.

“Togami-kun, if you have feelings for her, it really is okay,” said Makoto.

In fact, Makoto and the others had spent many conversations trying to decide how best to get Byakuya to confess his feelings because his pining was becoming too much to leave alone. Many times, they all heard Byakuya talk about how he would go personally to Towa City to retrieve Touko. They all heard Byakuya talk about Touko during lunch breaks, sharing facts like how they had both seen the same cult movie before and quoting different parts of her various novels which he had taken up reading. And all of them had heard his sighs, seen him drum his fingers as he stared out of a window and knew who he was thinking about.

Makoto pleaded in his head with Byakuya to confirm what everyone already knew. His inner voice begged. Strained.

Finally, Byakuya’s brow cracked.

“Are you in on this with the others?” asked Byakuya. 

That was not what Makoto expected. Makoto tilted his head.

“Others?” he said.

“You are saying what the others said when I came to them for help,” sneered Byakuya. He pointed at Makoto. “Hagakure, Asahina, Kirigiri... They all told me that my speeches sounded like confessions of love.”

Apparently, Byakuya had gone to everyone else before seeking Makoto out. Makoto didn’t know how to feel about that, or if this was a good time to feel anything about that. Byakuya rested his head in his hand.

“I just want to thank Fukawa for the work she has done,” Byakuya told Makoto, the rough edges to his tone softening. “Not just for her role with Towa City and rescuing me. Not even for all the errands she has run for me. In my family, as you know, it’s tradition for the heir to be selected from a pool of siblings. I was a business investment first and foremost. Everyone was my opponent. Anyone could be getting close to me just to try to take me down and replace me.”

A sad twinge puckered in Makoto’s chest. He cocked his head to one side. Though he looked at Byakuya, Byakuya didn’t look back at him, not as Byakuya lowered his hands or as he began talking again.

“The conglomerate was powerful. Rich,” said Byakuya. “It was the elite of the elite. Now it’s just me. And yet... knowing this, Fukawa stayed by my side. Her feelings, her opinion, didn’t waver. She doesn’t see me as a Togami first and foremost, but as Byakuya. Byakuya-sama.”

Makoto’s brow creased, and he lifted a hand, faltering, but he ended up resting his hand on Byakuya’s shoulder. Byakuya continued not looking at him. He didn’t shove Makoto off either.

“I thought I was helping her by teaching her to be more independent, to improve herself, but I didn’t realise until later that she taught me as well,” said Byakuya, his eyes downcast. “She gains power from her emotions, rather than let them drag her down. You and her... both showed me emotions and bonds can give strength. That depending on others doesn’t mean you’re weak. And she... with how she feels for me... how she can draw strength from her love...”

Byakuya’s features hardened, and he switched on the brakes on his verbalised train of thought. Makoto felt him tremble faintly under his hand. His chest gave a sad clench, and he tilted his head to one side. Perhaps they had all been too harsh on Byakuya. Too impatient. What seemed obvious to them was another world for Byakuya, one that Byakuya had for so long been taught was lowly enough for him to grind his heel against.

“Togami-kun, I know you will think this is a copout answer, or complain I’m being too nice, but I don’t think you need to prepare a speech or worry about what you will say to her,” said Makoto. Byakuya didn’t stir, but Makoto wasn’t discouraged. “It’s good that you’re able to articulate your thoughts, and all of us shouldn’t make assumptions about what you’re talking about. I think... it’s one of those times when it’s best to wait until the moment to say what you think is appropriate, but if what you said in your speech is how you feel, then I think... you should tell her that.”

No response from Byakuya. Makoto’s lips curled up at the ends and he waved his hand, keeping his other on his friend’s shoulder.

“If you find out you don’t know what to say, you can always offer her a hug,” Makoto suggested in a light tone. “I’m expecting to have bruises after Komaru’s done hugging me.”

A laugh escaped Makoto, shaky but good-natured. Byakuya finally turned to him, and Makoto felt sure Byakuya was smiling very slightly.

“Yes, I think you’re right,” Byakuya decided quietly. “A hug may suffice. Here. Let me practice on you.”

Before Makoto could understand what was about to happen, Byakuya closed the gap between their bodies and wrapped his arms around Makoto, giving The Most Awkward Hug that Makoto had ever experienced. The hug wasn’t bad, but Makoto’s face was smothered in Byakuya’s chest, and he didn’t sink at all into Byakuya. It was like pressing his face against a window.

After a while, Byakuya stepped back, and Makoto breathed again, head spinning slightly.

Their first hug.

Probably their last too.

Still, Makoto appreciated it. Both of them regarded each other. Makoto broke the ice first.

“I think this sort of thing should also wait until the moment it’s happening,” said Makoto. He adjusted his collar. “But... um... I recommend loosening up a bit when you do it next time.”

“I think so too,” agreed Byakuya. “I’ll keep note of your critique.”

Then, Byakuya added,

“Now that is out of the way, there is one more thing. When I meet with Fukawa again, I wish to give her a present. I don’t want to give her any food, though I know her diet needs attention, so I thought I would give her a piece of jewelry. A ring - ”

Makoto could only handle so much in a day. He threw up his hands and flounced out. 

The door nearly smacked into Kanon Nakajima’s face. Byakuya must have scheduled an appointment with her too, but Makoto was too exasperated to dwell on it.

She started, “Is - ?”

“In there,” said Makoto, passing by, and he went home to play video games.

[inspector-montoya-fox]

#12 - He Who Tames The Iron Horse

Setting: what a fucking interlude of an episode. but it’s all good. after the absolute shit-show that were episodes 2 to 4, who can blame lil’ ol’ He Who Tames The Iron Horse ? this episode feels super brief and i think that’s because some of the missions feel more major than others due to the fact that the gang steals Clockwerk parts throughout. every time the gang hijacks an iron horse, it feels like a mini operation. lemme refer to my fav post by @designraccoon​ which i so often refer to. He Who Tames The Iron Horse is the first level in the series to take place during daytime. and that makes so much sense because the previous 4 levels have been an absolute epic. so the player is rewarded with an episode which leaves all the doom & gloom behind and shifts focus onto happiness. in terms of narrative, this episode is probably the gang’s best outing. as Sly says at the end cutscene The Gang and I had pulled off the impossible. We'd successfully robbed all of Jean Bison's Iron Horse trains and we were walking away with three, count them, three, Clockwerk parts. And as a bonus, we shut down spice distribution in all of North America. yeap. pretty great stuff for the gang. Carmelita is back in the fold, almost all of the Clockwerk parts have been retrieved, and it’s freakin day outside man, what else do you want. the environment is so serene and beautiful despite the killer bears and blood-hungry eagles. and everything just blends together with this pastel baby blue colour. similar to Sly 2′s previous episodes, the environment goes hand-in-hand with the narrative’s mood. the gang’s success and laid-back attitude is reflected in the nature’s peacefulness. due to the shift in narrative there’s not much to say. the overall story is obviously taking a high after a major low before taking another major low (which the game had the balls to end with). as i’ve mentioned, the player is rewarded: nothing is too serious and the missions are all bombastic and fun. i know most of y’all love Spice in the Sky, and then you get to kidnap baby bears with Murray, or jump on trains while they’re going full speed. maybe the gang shouldn’t be too cocky with their success and luck because as we know, things soon take a turn for the worse, but do you blame them? they’ve been through so much. they deserve a nice vacay in the Canadian wilderness.

Characters: this shift in mood directly results in Jean Bison’s large absence from the episode. in retrospect, He Who Tames The Iron Horse’s biggest obstacle is Carmelita, the trains, maybe Neyla or the bears - not Jean Bison. and it’s interesting because right from the get go, SP drops a huge chunk of info on us. essentially, while Jean Bison and Arpeggio are scheming and plotting the world’s destruction, their presence is reduced to almost nothing. i’m aware that Rajan and the Contessa also didn’t show up that much in their first levels, but somehow that felt different. when plotting to steal the Clockwerk wings, the plan included destroying Rajan’s party which led to his big time grudge against the gang. when plotting to break Sly and Murray out of prison, that felt more personal because of what the Contessa had done to them. whereas here, sure the iron horses are something personal to Bison, but he’s a complete stranger. he only appears at the beginning for that significant dialogue and then very briefly at the end, when he’s in one of the trains. this is good because, without Bison’s monstrous presence looming over the gang, the episode naturally orbits around them and their mass success. it’s not to say that the gang underestimates him. more like ignores him. as we’ll see in Menace from the North, eh? SP plays up Bison’s savagery and gruesome nature by spotlighting how his plans affect the environment and even going so far as to call his house ‘the lair of the beast’. but for now, Bison’s put on hold. i also want to touch on our mains, meaning the gang and Carmelita. after taking down the Contessa, both seem to have risen to the top. zenith. for the gang, confronting their inner demons and being separated leads to an increase in group missions. hijaking the trains requires all three members, Murray and Sly team up in Spice in the Sky, etc. and again, this is a honeymoon phase. everything seems to be rolling smoothly and this newly found cooperation seems to be working best, which will later on save their asses in Anatomy for Disaster, when it won’t be “honeymoon time” anymore. He Who Tames The Iron Horse seems to be a reminder that the gang works best when they work together. as for Carmelita, she might still be exiled from Interpol, but after escaping from the Contessa, she’s trying her best to keep afloat. i mean, i don’t want to say that she’s accepted the status quo, but at least she’s trying to bust the gang as proof that she’s clean. she’s emotionally back in check, which is amazing, sweetie.

Themes: a hard one. after lots of thinking i’ve come up with speed theme. this is presented via the trains and how they play a key role in this episode, but also how they reflect the good time the gang is having. time flies when you’re having fun, and the gang is having a blast. the smile on Sly’s face during the end cutscene says it all. as i’ve said, this episode feels super short. the gag and the player are enjoying themselves so much that it’s soon over. for such a chill episode, He Who Tames The Iron Horse sure seems to divulge in acceleration and the occasional adrenaline rush. battles on moving trains, getting chased by bears, eagles and Carmelita. again, SP manages to blend two major elements together to create stark contrast. the serene Canadian atmosphere is complete with shallow waters, thin ice and fluffy snow. in antithesis, most of the missions are frenzied and have high stakes, like exploding hot air balloons and wild bear attacks. but other than that, i’m stumped. like, the main thing about this episode is its serenity, but that’s less of a theme and more of a characteristic about the narrative. so yea.

What I Like: oh SP knew. they knew how every. single. person. playing the cottdamn game would want to glide off from the top of that central mountain. so they added a treasure there too. brilliant. bRILLIANT ! also in this episode, Neyla looking completely badass when she flies in out of nowhere on a freakin hover jet i don’t even know what that shit is, like something straight out of Star Wars. like that moment made me a straight furry for a sec or something. Carmelita and Murray’s exchange while she’s holding him hostage is gold too (jellybeans!!!). and lastly, that cute lil’ orange snow plow thingy carrying the guards inside. it’s so cUtE !!

What I Don’t Like: that fucking mole guard. you know which one.

Quote: Bison, you covetous troglodyte. You've already got the lion's share of the parts. or I'm grateful for the jellybeans and all but aren't you on the outs with Interpol right now?

[crusherthedoctor]

It goes without saying: the first level always matters. If it doesn’t leave a good impression, it would hardly motivate you to give the rest of the journey a chance, would it? Being in fanfic form aside, Beyond the Stars is no exception, and because of this, Gleaming Meadows was actually one of the longest zones to work out. Viridonia is meant to stand out from previous Sonic settings after all, and kicking things off with a poor man’s Green Hill wouldn’t cut it.

Since the first level in a Sonic game usually tends to be either a hilly area (Green Hill, Emerald Hill, Seaside Hill) or an urban area (City Escape, Westopolis, Windmill Isle to an extent), I decided a good way to set this zone apart would be to... combine the two! This was inspired very much by Neo Green Hill from Sonic Advance, since although that zone wasn’t a city, it did add some minor urban elements the further it went on, most notably the bridge at the end where you fight Eggman. So as tribute to a forever underrated installment, Gleaming Meadows does that too, but in a different way.

Creating Zone 1: Gleaming Meadows

1-1: Blossom Fields

What’s a good way to make your first level stand out from all the Green Hills? Give it more than green, obviously. While it’s important that the entire adventure is full of interesting locations, I really wanted the first level to sound as gorgeous as possible in order to leave a strong first impression for this new journey, so what better inspiration than tulip fields, particularly those of the Netherlands?

The added use of yellows, oranges, reds and pinks already help set it apart, but there’s also the fact that although there are some lakes and rivers here and there, it’s not particularly coastal.

This aesthetic not only serves to get things off to a good start, but it also sums up the running theme with Beyond the Stars in general. Namely, that although plenty of the basic level tropes will be familiar to us all, many of them will be handled in rather different ways, thus proving that as long as you can think outside the box, there’s plenty of life in them yet. Some examples are more extreme than others, but other times, even a simple change of colour, weather, or time of day can make all the difference.

I mentioned in Chapter 1 proper that the cliffs in Blossom Fields have unique markings that convey a vague, lore-hinting narrative. I couldn’t find a better image to explain how this would look, so I’ll have to resort to this shot from Paper Mario:

See the cliff behind them, with its starry patterns on the soil? That’s basically the gist, but with a more complex pattern.

Also mentioned was the addition of a tunnel near the end of the stage, which is one example of the Neo Green Hill-esque hillside with minor urban elements that I intended.

Don’t assume the inside is drab however. On the contrary, it comes with abstract graffiti in a style reminiscent of the Colinton Tunnel in Edinburgh:

Very Jet Set Radio, eh? In addition to simply being more interesting this way, I figured it fit Sonic perfectly.

But you might question what a tunnel inspired by Edinburgh is doing in a level inspired by the Netherlands. Well, this is another running gag with Viridonia. While not always the case, a lot of times there’ll be combined aspects of real world inspiration, as opposed to Unleashed and its clear cut Not-Greece, Not-New York, etc. This is not just me throwing things at the wall to see what sticks, there is in fact a purpose to it, as it’s one of the more subtle ways of showing how peculiar Viridonia can be compared to other places in Sonic history - partly due to the Ethereal Zone - with only the Little Planet truly competing with the island in that field.

And y’know, it gives it that extra bit of identity and variety, eh?

Now, with music choices to explain what sort of musical atmosphere I’d have in mind for each level, I’m gonna have to use basic links from now on, since I rediscovered the hard way that Tumblr only allows up to five or so direct posts. It’s also worth noting that if this were a real game, it would do what SA1 (and, uh, ‘06) did before it, with each level having at least two different bits of music for the appropriate sections to add even more flair. I’ll still be listing two examples each for extra comparison’s sake, so with that said...

First Section (the fields): Opening Demo (Sonic Mega Collection) Ending B (Sonic Advance 3)

Second Section (the tunnel): Topical Tropical (Sonic: Before the Sequel) Shooting Ristar

1-2: Swanky Suburbs

Continuing the Netherland theme going on, the local town has a touch of Giethoorn to it, with its calming rivers and little pathways. Though unlike Giethoorn, there would be some cars and short roads sprinkled about.

Again, really wanted to convey that feeling of low-key beauty and coziness, and provide more justification for why Sonic and Co would come here for a vacation. But that’s not all: when it comes to the houses and other buildings, the red and white colour scheme is more based on those of Portugal:

And of course, you have the local parks as well. You can even interact with the slides and swings if you want, because you’re never too old to make the kids wait their turn.

First Section (calm): Neo Green Hill Classic The Amazon (DuckTales Remastered)

Second Section (when Badniks start wrecking things up): Wave Ocean ~The Inlet~ (Sonic ‘06) Andy’s Neighborhood (Toy Story 2)

1-3: Yellow Hills

As we go on, we leave the Netherland influence behind, and with the countryside in sight, the clue is in the name. Lots of yellow to be had indeed.

And inbetween all these fields, we have some villages, of which the rural vibe suits the place just fine.

Then as we go into farmyard territory, the yellow actually starts taking a back seat in favor of red, because I guess even I’m not immune to the subverting expectations fever. Hopefully I’ve done it in a way that isn’t asinine though.

The barnyards would be the stereotypical red and white, since it works well enough with the autumn colours, and can still pop out despite there being so much red surrounding them.

And yes, there are many farm animals hanging around here.

Yes, that includes horses.

No, they’re not Trudy’s family.

First Section (yellow): Tornado Alley (Crash Bandicoot: The Wrath of Cortex) Mount Lineland (Super Paper Mario)

Second Section (red): Green Hill ‘12 (Tee Lopes) Menu (Mario Tennis)

1-4: Rusty Mill

A wooden mill doesn’t leave a lot to the imagination, so it would look pretty much exactly as you’d expect, albeit a tad more old and worn.

The same goes for inside, really. Since the interior of mills are tricky to find interesting images of when elaborating on your quirky Sonic the Hedgehog zone, I’ll be using another game for comparison instead, specifically Donkey Kong Country 3:

Except multiply the cobwebs by five.

It’s decayed, and a bit grim, but not enough to the point where it would feel like it’s near the endgame. Yet another thing I go in hard on in this story: escalation. In order for later zones and climactic moments to be more striking and impactful, you gotta start off by taking it easy. There’s still action to be had, and there’s still mysterious and/or ominous touches here and there, but it’s for the purpose of organically building things up, so that when things do escalate, you actually feel it when shit starts going down. Pacing, boys and girls! Learn it!

Then again, as with Angel Island in S3&K, this place gets set on fire halfway through, so maybe I need to remember my own lessons. But on the other hand, also like S3&K, it still pales in comparison to what happens later, so...

Lastly for today, when you’re fighting the fearsome Paindozer, the section of the mill that you confront it in suspiciously takes a form more akin to a old fashioned warehouse. Like... IKEA, I guess. But on fire.

So congratulations, you got through IKEA Zone. Looks like Eggman should have stuck with B&Q Zone instead.

First Section (calm): Pogo Painter (Crash Bash) The Walk of Life (Rayman 2)

Second Section (on fire): Vs. Rotatatron & Refreshinator (Sonic Colours) Set Point - Match Point (Mario Tennis)

[wildlyminiaturesandwich]

I'm curious to hear your thoughts on the announcements from Maxis Monthly? Did the Game Changers know about or have any say in the rebrand?

Ok so I’m gonna answer your last question first lol

The title “Game Changer” is definitely a little confusing because it implies that we actually change the game in some way, but we don’t. Well, most of us don’t. I think some of the bigger Game Changers have a little sway because they know the team personally and have been to the Sims Headquarters and stuff, but for the most part all we do is get early access so that we can provide our individual communities with a glimpse of the pack that goes a little more in depth than just trailers, that way people can see what’s included and decide if they want to buy it, and hopefully bring more people to the franchise in the process. And we definitely didn’t have anything to do with the rebrand, we heard about it at the same time everyone else did.

As for your first question, I’m gonna put it under a cut for a couple reasons: [a] Listen, I have opinions lol and [b] for anyone that is like me and is sensitive to colour contrast, I don’t want anyone getting a nasty headache or sore eyes if they don’t have to. Let’s do this!

So first off, LOVE that they’re adding over 1000+ decorative world objects! There have been so many things over the years in different packs that I’m sure we’ve all seen and been like “Why didn’t you let us use that!?”, and now we’ll be able to! Sucks that some creators spent so much time liberating those things for us only to now have their work be obsolete though 😕

I also think the Create-A-Sim Story Mode looks interesting. I don’t like the idea that you can’t change the sims aspiration and traits though; they’re locked in once you’ve finished answering the questions. I’m not sure how much use I’ll get out of it, as I tend to either pick specific traits based on my sim’s backstory or randomise them, but it’s nice to know the option is there and answering the questions might be fun to see what kind of sim you get!

Now, onto the rebrand.

I just don’t understand it!

Listen, I’ll be the first to admit, I don’t like change; I don’t do well with big changes at all. But this isn’t about that, this is about trying to understand why EA felt the need to rebrand The Sims 4 (which I can’t work out) and why they chose those colours, and I just… don’t understand.

I mean I understand, they’re trying to attract a younger audience with bright shiny things. But I don’t UNDERSTAND, you know? I don’t understand what prompted them to do it now, after almost five years?! Why did they feel the need to change something that didn’t need to be fixed at all? And why they went with this particular colour scheme! It’s so unnecessarily bright! As a graphic designer I’m genuinely horrified by the colours they chose and as a consumer of their product, I’m a little annoyed that they spent time and money on this when there are other things that are more important (like things that are actually broken) that keep getting the “We don’t have the resources” excuse or just flat out ignored.

Here’s the difference between the original box arts and the rebranded ones:

That blue is GOD AWFUL! It’s like Tumblr’s new blue background; I literally have a headache from looking at it! It doesn’t fit with the style of the rest of the game at all. And they claimed in the stream that the new box art designs really make the render sims “pop”… they really don’t. The backgrounds of the DLC packs are way too busy. I just I don’t understand why they couldn’t just stick with the nice clean, minimalist look they had before; it was truly a timeless design. A design that actually made the render sims pop and didn’t detract from them at all with busy backgrounds and headache-inducing colours!

Oh and can we just talk about the new base game box art render for a second? I love it, I really do. It looks cool and I’m excited to get to learn more about these new sims that are being added and according to the Gurus in the stream, all of the stuff on those sims is being added to base game (the stuff that’s not already base game that is). I’m excited about that pink hair BUT take a good look at all the other stuff… look familiar? That’s because most of us have already paid for that stuff. The jacket on the pink haired sim is from Get Famous, the beanie on the sim next to her is from Get to Work, the hair under the beanie is from Dine Out, the bracelet on the sim with the camera is from Seasons, the chef uniform in the middle is from Get to Work, the jacked on the sim up the back with the phone is from Get Together, and the sleeveless hoodie on the sim to the left of that is from Fitness Stuff. They’re all recolours of stuff from other packs. I’m all for free content, because hey it’s free, but I really wish they wouldn’t make things from other packs base game; people paid for that stuff.

Side note: I feel sorry for the people who collect the psychical copies of the games, because unless they can afford to buy new copies of all the packs, any new packs aren’t going to match their old ones now. And also the people who got tattoos of the old plumbob 😕

Which brings me to the plumbob, and yet another before and after:

The new plumbob is whatever; I don’t hate it, I just prefer the original. It matched the one in game and suited the artstyle of the whole game really well, whereas the new one looks too much like The Sims 3 and doesn’t suit The Sims 4 at all. It’s also not going to match the plumbob in-game anymore as for some reason they decided not to change that one? I mean it wouldn’t matter to me if it did because I always have my default file edited to get rid of it, but it just makes no sense to leave the original in there if you’re changing everything else.

New box art, plumbob and stuff aside, the thing that probably annoys me the most about this rebrand is that the pack icons and colours are changing. I get that they probably ran out of colours to choose from for each pack, but the fact that it’s so hard to tell the difference between the colours for the game and stuff packs is gonna be a problem for anyone who has difficulty distinguishing between different colour tones. Mr Sandwich, for example, couldn’t tell that there was a difference between the two, even after I pointed it out to him. Why didn’t they make one of them yellow?!

I personally used to find things from expansions in the catalogue by looking for the colour of each pack icon. “I know the thing I’m looking for is from Get Famous, so I’ll just keep scrolling until I see a pink icon”… well, not anymore:

All expansion packs are now teal, all game packs are now blue (a different blue than the box art blue I might add 😩), and all stuff packs are green; the only difference is the icon on them. And yes, I’m aware you can filter things by pack, that’s what I used to do for stuff and game packs because they were always the same colour, but if I’m just scrolling through say the curtains category, it’s a lot quicker to just scroll once or twice looking for an icon colour than it is to go into the little menu, click on “packs”, scroll down to the pack I want and choose it.

The new pack icons and colours also look awful on the main menu. Here’s a little before and after again:

Urgh that blue! There as nothing wrong with the original menu but now we’re gonna have the god awful blue again… not the point, sorry. Look at those icons! They’re too… saturated? busy? both? I dunno what but they look awful, especially on the blue background! At the very least they should have just made them one solid colour instead of trying to carry over the crystallized look.

And lastly the loading screen….

Again with the gross colour combinations and the background is just plain boring. The old one is much nicer and easier on the eyes.

Maybe it’s because I’m old and not the target audience for this new look but honestly I JUST DON’T GET IT! I understand that EA are trying to attract more people to the game, obviously younger people, but I really don’t think alienating and confusing the people who currently play your game in favour of luring in new people is this is the way to go about it.

Thankfully I’ve already seen a couple of the amazingly talented modders in the community say they’ll do everything they can to either give us back the original menus and loading screens or make a less obnoxious version as soon as they can, so I’m just gonna keep my fingers crossed that it won’t be too difficult for them to do and look forward to downloading those mods so I can play without getting a headache every time I have to look at the main menu and loading screen 😅

NOTE: Before anyone starts shouting at me for “being negative about a free update” just note that anon asked for my thoughts on it; these are my thoughts. If you like the new look that’s great, I’m really happy for you! But anon wanted my honest opinion and I’ve given it. Will this rebrand stop me playing the game? Of course not! The game is still the same no matter what the box art and menus look like, but that doesn’t mean I have to like them and it doesn’t mean I can’t express my disappointment about it all, especially if a follower asks for my opinion about it.

[skyrimfuckery]

ok so ugh

Here are some slightly outdated screenshots of the armor! As you can see I’ve added a lot of relief, detail and decoration to the metal. Getting it all lined up in terms of reflectivity and overall brightness was a bitch, because even though the textures look roughly the same, for some reason the meshes have slightly different lighting values which cause them to look brighter than others.

I’ve gone out of my way to slap together some kind of emblem for the belts, but now that I look at it i want to change it all up. I want something more elaborate, something square like with all kinds of things in the centre. The leather texture ain’t that interesting so why not cover it up with embellishments?

I tried to guide the decorations along the shape of the armor. For example, the lines on the tassets curve inwards, down, starting from the outer corners. This is supposed to draw attention to the roughly triangular shape of the piece. Before, the lines started from the centre in the top, and curved outwards. This looked awkward and gave the piece a more square appearance. Same goes for the pauldron. The base shapes are quite blocky, but I think I’ve managed to make them look as triagular as possible. I think I did a good job of inhibiting a different shape into the meshes by creatively texturing them.

Overall I’m quite surprised with the turn the design of this armor has taken. When I had initially constructed the mashup, I wanted to make it look kind of middle of the pack in terms of quality and make; not too fancy, but not too bland either. Somewhere along the line I went way overboard and just fucking added fluting everywhere, as did I change up the colour scheme. I’m happy with this, though. It’s just not what I expected. I think the regal look of that deep red velvet combined with the decorated plackart kind of steered the design of the armour towards a more sophisticated look, which is a big departure from my previous style. I suppose that’s why the textures have also taken so long, even though I’ve become increasingly efficient at making textures in photoshop.

i’ve been so busy with all kinds of shit except for making textures and i hate it so much why does this keep happening all the time? why cant i just shit out an amazing armor in about three weeks time no questions asked? there’s a fucking lockdown going on and i cant even bear to finish it. I guess im lucky that i stil got my job and got scheduled for my normal hours so i can pay the bills and i am very grateful for that, but it sucks that i cant finish this armor set and continue playing the game.

Only the leggy bois left and some fuggin gauntlets and booooooots and i can release this bitch ass

[shenlongshao]

GGS Redesign Analysis: Millia Rage

This is super long overdue, but welcome to another part of the GGStrive redesign analysis! Last time, I did Zato, which can be found here.  Now it’s time to do Millia Rage!^_^ MILLIA RAGE ------------------- “How is it possible she keeps getting prettier?!” and “She looks so gorgeous!” is what the majority of people said after seeing Millia’s reveal trailer. Since she has a few designs in the past, I’ll be talking about each one starting with her look in Guilty Gear: The Missing Link.

(Here’s a direct link to see it bigger https://i.imgur.com/dR9DBod.jpg) Millia’s initial design has a simple, yet unique and retro type style. The height and width of her collar conveys the traits of being mysterious, distant, and reserved. The short bubble sleeves of her form-fitting, white leotard displays a hint of her feminine and elegant side. Layered over the leotard is a sleeveless, short blue overalls dress with hip-high slits. On her arms is long, fingerless gloves with double metal plates. On her feet is ankle-length boots with blue frontal metal plating. Sometimes, she would try to conceal herself with a long, beige cloak when venturing in public. The primary aspect of her design is her blonde hair, which the majority of it is her Forbidden Beast called Angra. And lastly, there’s a thick, blue headband to compliment her look. Before the events of the 1st game, Millia was an orphan until being raised by the Assassin’s Guild and forcefully given Angra(it hasn’t be directly stated what she lost in exchange, but there’s some implications on what it might be). The style of her black gloves shows she’s combat ready while the style of her clothing tells of her valuing the aspect of able to move freely. Although the training and traits of an assassin has been instilled in her, the blue and white color scheme conveys how much she wanted to get away from that lifestyle. I think this design was good for its time, but I’m glad it was improved in Guilty Gear X. Next is what was her iconic look.

The concept of Millia’s original design has been kept and updated rather than a complete change. Her long, black fingerless gloves and her ankle-length boots is the same. However, one of the changes is she wears a black leotard underneath instead of white. There’s also the design of her high-collared, short-sleeved dress. It has two buckle straps within her bustline and at the helms along with blue trim. I notice how white is the dominant color this time instead of blue, so l’ll be gathering the color personality traits that fit Millia. Color Personality of White:  https://www.empower-yourself-with-color-psychology.com/personality-color-white.html Having a personality color white means you are neat and immaculate in your appearance, in the presentation of your home and in your car, almost to the point of being fanatical.  You are well-balanced, sensible, discreet and wise. With a personality color white, you are cautious, practical and careful with money. You think carefully before acting - you are definitely not prone to impulsive behavior. You tend to have a great deal of self control.

You are confident, poised and self-assured when at your most positive, but can also be very choosy and fastidious when the mood strikes. You can be very critical of yourself and others (in your need for perfection) - but you try to be fair and impartial as well. You are self-sufficient and a loner - you don't want or need help from anyone. However, you may also experience times of loneliness because of this trait. You may be wishing to create simplicity in your life - perhaps a wish to re-create your childhood, lost youth and happier times in your past life.

You can be quite sexually prudish with your need for self-control and perfection. You hide your flaws from others to give an impression of perfection. You may appear to be shy, but you do have strong beliefs about most things and love the opportunity to air those beliefs. The challenge for you is to be open-minded and flexible and to communicate your needs and desires. Color Personality of Blue: https://www.empower-yourself-with-color-psychology.com/personality-color-blue.html You are conservative, reliable and trustworthy - you are quite trusting of others although you are very wary in the beginning until you are sure of the other person. At the same time, you also have a deep need to be trusted. You are not impulsive or spontaneous - you always think before you speak and act and do everything at your own pace in your own time. You take time to process and share your feelings. You are genuine and sincere, and you take your responsibilities seriously. Having a personality color blue means you have a deep need for peace and harmony in your everyday life - you don't like having your feathers ruffled. You would benefit from daily meditation and quiet time for reflection, introspection and self-discovery. You appear to be confident and self-controlled, but may be hiding your vulnerable side. Being a personality color blue means you are generally fairly even-tempered, unless your emotions take over - then you can become either moody and over-emotional, or cool and indifferent.

You can be rigid - you like to stick to what is familiar to you and it is hard to sway you from your path - you stubbornly do things your way even if there is a better way. You need to have direction & order in your living and work spaces - untidiness and unpredictability overwhelm you. You don't like to draw attention to yourself - you prefer to be in the background. Color Personality of Black: https://www.empower-yourself-with-color-psychology.com/color-black.html You are independent, strong-willed and determined and like to be in control of yourself and situations. With black as your personality color, you may be too serious for your own good - bring some colour into your life to lighten you up - life should be fun. With a personality color black, you may be looking for protection from any negativity that surrounds you. You may wish to create an aura of mystery and intrigue, as in the sexy black negligee. You may be going through a stage of self-denial, not allowing pleasure and joy into your life. You hold things inside and are not good at sharing yourself with others, possibly out of fear. You are methodical in your work, making sure everything is completed as required, down to the last detail. You may have lost sight of your direction in life and are going through a very negative phase. These perfectly describe Millia and like the improvements to her design. Story-wise, Millia was still on the path of severing ties with her teacher/lover Zato and the Guild. But she wasn’t able to fully live peacefully due to Zato’s body got taken over by Eddie. The biggest change is how Zato got revived by the Conclave, which stirs the mixed feelings she has for him and forces her to deal with her feelings and what to do with her life; meaning a change in her design.

This is the first redesign of Millia’s look that really accentuates her feminine nature and hint of Russian heritage. The style of her hair is different with side-swept bangs and layers extending beyond her cheeks(without Angra, her hair grew to her shoulders). There’s still hints of her previous look with the style of the long-sleeved coat dress she wears. It now has the added detail of decorative button within the orange tie saying “Curiosity killed the cat”(she likes cats and chasing them). She still has the high collar and how there’s a single buckle with a loose strap wrapped around her lower shoulders. There’s two buttons near the black cuffs of her sleeves and helms of her coat dress. Her gloves are much shorter and this time, is white with orange trim. The black leggings and the white, ballerina-inspired shoes displays her elegant side. The Russian style hat has the labels Z1-28 and 13; Z for Zato and 1-28 referring to his birthday and 13 for the years they were together. The most interesting part of of her look is the main color is golden yellow. There’s also some hint of orange, so let’s see what it means for her. Color Personality of Yellow: https://www.empower-yourself-with-color-psychology.com/personality-color-yellow.html You analyze everything, all the time, and are methodical in your thinking. You have a strong independent streak in you, and are selective with your choice of friends, keeping a small group of close and like-minded friends rather than being involved in team events or large social gatherings. You communicate well on a mental level with like-minded people, but can become bitter and sharp-tongued if crossed. With a personality color yellow, you can be stubborn but dislike pettiness and spitefulness of all kinds. You like to think you are intelligent and well educated, with knowledge about many topics. You are a smart dresser and always dress to impress. Color Personality of Orange: https://www.empower-yourself-with-color-psychology.com/personality-color-orange.html You are friendly, good-natured and a generally agreeable person. You are tolerant and accepting of others just the way they are. You enjoy being physically active, particularly in the outdoors, whether it's simply going for a walk, or competing in high level sporting competitions. I love this design for her because of how well it shows her style and personality. My only complaint is it’s way too much yellow, XD. But Millia has went through a major character development with the realization there is some good moments during her time in the Guild, such as people she formed connections with(Zato, Slayer, and Venom). That instead of running from the Guild, she decides to return and vows to be the next leader to reform it. She concludes that a simple, normal life is not what’s meant to be. It’s really basically a poor excuse for her to keep appearing in future games, lol. Thus, it’s time for to have another redesign, which I’ll begin with her face.

The structure of Millia’s face looks softer with slightly rounder cheeks and smoother chin to emphasize her femininity. I notice how she’s given a distinctive nose shape rather than giving her a standard female nose. The tip is smoother and the bridge of her nose has a elongated curve. The most pronounced feature of her face is her eyes. Not only is it similar to style of the older GG games(like X2), but her eyelashes are thicker. It conveys of her being mature, elegant, and confident. Another thing I noticed about her eyes isn’t the same shade of blue like Ky’s in the previous games. Lighting does have a huge effect on how a color appears, so I did looked at Ky’s under the same lighting and stage; Ky’s is pure blue compared to Millia’s. Next is seeing the rest of her upper body.

(Link to see it bigger https://i.imgur.com/19919qD.png) There’s some things kept from her Xrd SIGN design like the button that says “Curiosity kills the cat”  and “Z1-28″ and “13″ on her hat. The material of her Russian hat is fur like a traditional one, once again wanting to highlight her nationality. The style of her clothes is drastically different with wearing a formal black blouse with orange trim and the details on her new, form-fitting dress coat. Below the bust area, the printed words on it says “Ivy Traditional”, which is mostly like the name of the clothing brand she’s wearing. There’s buttons from the front beginning from her stomach downward and buckle straps around the sleeves and the outer center on the upper part of the coat. Accenting the look is a orange scarf attached and wrapped around her shoulders. An interesting detail around one of her sleeves is the strap with the tag “P.W.A.B.”(I circled it in the picture). Considering what happened in Revelator(1 and 2), it must be relating to what Millia’s goal is and has a high position. Surprisingly, there’s no full picture of her yet so I’ll have to show a screenshot instead.

She also seems to have kept her black leggings, but have different shoes. Now she wears high boots with orange trim at the bottom. Millia’s primary color is French beige this time, so let’s look at the color personality.(I had to go to a different site) Color Personality for Beige: https://colorogy.com/beige-color-meaning.html You are modest about your achievements. You can keep secrets and confidences. Your understated and low key persona can fascinate and intrigue other people. You come across as enigmatic as you say little and leave a lot unsaid. You keep your cool even in difficult situations. People are drawn to your calmness and inherent tranquility. You have an indefinable quality that adds to your allure and this can mean you are always or frequently surrounded by admirers. You prefer to play by the rules and being ethical is one of your priorities. You are a true friend and a loyal partner in your relationships. When it comes to friendship, it is not a hectic social life and a long list of friends that you look for or want for yourself. You are happy and content with a small, trusted group of friends. Loyalty is something that comes naturally to you. You are loyal and expect the same in return. You have the ability to grasp new ideas and concepts quickly. You amass knowledge for wisdom and for knowledge’s sake. You are interested in everything that goes on in the world and in your areas of interest. You are much in tune with all that occurs in your immediate environment. You are responsible and dependable. You are introspective and enjoy discovering meaning to your beliefs and way of thinking. When you start something new your intention is always to take it to a logical conclusion. When you become interested in something you burn with ideas and energy to get what you want. You are protective about your loved ones. You are even protective about the welfare of perfect strangers. You may take up a cause that inspires you and quietly do your bit without mentioning it to anyone. Seeing someone else miserable or suffering in some way can cause you emotional distress and take the shine off your day. Refined and sophisticated define your personality perfectly. This reflects in every aspect of your life, your fashion sense, your lifestyle, your behavior and your choices. Even when you encounter difficult, irate or rude people, you may not retaliate, as you believe undignified behavior is below your dignity. You get content with the way your life is and resist major change. You enjoy being in your comfort zone and are reluctant to step out of it to face the unknown and have different kind of experiences. You think of and plan for tomorrow. You have goals and ambitions that you plan to achieve and have a concrete plan in place. The efforts you put in towards achieving all that you want in life are consistent. You don’t back down; come what may, when you really want something. With Millia taking on a high position role and how she wishes to make a positive change in the Guild, wanting to be with her allies, etc. The color beige definitely fits her, especially since it also describes traits she has since the beginning. There’s Venom, whom they used to not get along, but have learned to put the past behind them. Zato, her mentor and the one she loved, whom she still deeply cares for, etc. It’ll be interesting to see how her story unfolds and how she takes on this role. All of Millia’s designs have been great in their own way and love how her Strive design takes it a step further. She’s more beautiful than before(which I didn’t think was possible, lol), her professional and elegant style highlights her personality and growth as a person, and love her striking eyes. I’m really glad yellow isn’t her main color anymore because I felt it was too overpowering, especially with her hair being also yellow. Beige is a much better color and compliments very well. Rating: S + + +  (Gorgeous~!)