#i think itd be helpful for people who want to write will but dont have access to the books

[willryist]

Next fic is either Springtrap/Henry or not a ship and just Henry and Charlie depending on which one I feel like doing first. I also have two x readers and another willry fic planned for the future if I ever feel like writing. Also I lowkey wanna write a Jessica/Charlie fic because I've been thinking about them so much as of recent and I never write w/w ships. Problem is I have literally no ideas for them and ideas for writing have to come naturally for me. I can't just. . . TRY to think of it. I came up with three fic ideas while writing the last fic I did just out of pure coincidence and I don't think I'll ever get that kind of creativity again

[tossball-stick]

heyy i saw your latest post about john's aromantic trutherism and i didn't exactly understand what you mean by that... could you explain? i too don't think he is actually in love with abigail if that's what you were saying...?

hiii!!! 1: thank you for asking about this im excited to write and analyze him in this way

2: plsplspls get the idea outta ur head that aromantic people cant love. noooo i couldnt have been misunderstood more. i wanna clarify that i do think john loves abigail. i just dont think that love is all that romantically motivated and ive got a few reasons to believe so.

3: uhhhh uhhh this ended up being like 2.5k words of analysis on john im sorry. no one on tumblr has asked me my thoughts about him before so this is the first time im talking about a lot of the stuff here and theres so much ive thought about johns character and its all messy and intertwined. itll be a little all over the place. i am deeply sorry.

okay. first reason? hes otherwise not much of a romantic. whether he wants to be or not, he falls flat on his face every attempt there is at being romantic with abigail (rarely do we see him be romantic with other women) is usually met with disdain, if there even are many to begin with. its rare to hear john say something pleasant about having a woman, and its rare to ever witness them having a good time together while in the gang. 

...up until the epilogue and john gets his shit together. but by that point i could argue further analysis as to how john isnt wholly himself by that point. hear me out.

john and arthur are two halves of one whole to me. its clear theres some sort of void in john after arthur dies, and he still holds the memory of arthur very very dear. he does his best to keep the memories alive, in fact, in a way to keep arthur alive. 

this starts extending to some kinda interesting parallels, though. writing and drawing in arthurs journal like he did, the hat being placed on johns head, john proposing with marys ring, the phrasing and tone of johns proposal is also shockingly familiar to arthur telling john that itd make him happy if john went to his family... after arthurs death, i find john taking on many of his traits even. he becomes more quiet and closed off, we see it even in rdr2 with arthur telking him to "knock it off with the whole being mysterious thing" or whatever. arthur claims its to act like dutch, but ill do you one better, its clearly just john idolizing his older brother and trying to be like him to be a proper man. this brings me to my next point...

the time period of rdr2!!! yayyy cowboys, the victorian era, Did u know. being a man was something you had to do in previous american and european cultures? this slowly started fading as we roll over into the 20th century, but there was a lot of emphasis placed on performing your role as a man. to be a good man, you must do xyz. otherwise, you are seen as immature, as a boy, as a child. 

throughout the entire series of red dead redemption, both 1 and 2, theres a lot of stuff pointing towards jogns struggle to Be A Man. arthur and dutch frequently refuse to let him grow up, still calling him "little john" and still treating him like hes a rowdy unruly boy that needs to learn better, not a man who should know better. hosea is the only man treating john like hes a man, and even then id say hes fairly lax with the guy. only as the story of rdr2 progresses do we see arthur start to shift his view towards john. not as a boy to stay a boy, because the gang isnt gonna be around forever. john cant keep being a boy. he needs to become a man, take care of his family. 

working off a distinctly gentleman influenced view of masculinity, johns inability to be a man is almost directly tied to his inability to be a proper romantic for his wife. compared to arthur, who is seen taken women on dates and flirting with them just to make them laugh at times. hes dancing with the ladies and helping them up and down the coaches, wagons, and horses. john like. just barely remembers to do that for abi in the epilogue. again, his failings to be a true romantic are tied with his failings as a man. 

in rdr1, this even extends to bill having the bit of dialogue, "you always were a scared little boy!" continuing to imply that john is not a man, hes never been a man. the only reason we can read him as a man Now is because we are going by arthurs definition of manhood. we can extend this further and say bill still views john as a boy because john does not live up to bills expectations of manhood- while arthur may view being a man as something chivalrous, more gentlemanly, bill clearly views masculinity as power and violence, without much to do with women. john does not live up to that, to bill, until the end.

if you read "masculinity" as "being romantic and chivalrous towards women", then, as john fails at being a romantic, he too fails at being a man. there are a lot of other ways john is immature and childish but this is a really easy one to point out if you know the time period and just how much emphasis was placed on both romanticism and manliness, and how they intertwined.

third reasoning for aro john: his family wasnt his for so much of his life. this one is another one that needs a bit of elaboration i fear.

the story of john and abigail getting together is simple enough. she joined the gang at 17 as a sex worker, slept around with some of the gang, then for one reason or another, very clearly believed that the pregnancy was johns. john runs away for a year.

in this time, we dont know a whole lot about what gang life was like without john. however, with arthurs comments about marrying abigail himself and loving her, and his close relationship with jack, i think its pretty clear arthur was the one being a man in johns place. when john left, there was a john shaped hole arthur had to fill. (i also like to think this because the potential misery of arthur having to lose his family a second time once john returns is fun to me.)

even in the story of rdr2, we see john Love and Care For his family, but its never in the same, romantic way arthur seems to involve himself in abi and jacks lives. john will defend them with his life, but when it actually comes to pulling himself up by his bootstraps and being a father or a husband, he kinda just drags his feet and gets lost. he has to be told to reunite with his family at jacks party, despite, in my eyes, his love for jack being very clearly displayed while they were looking for him. 

this is only bolstered by the conclusion of rdr2, with john and arthur on the mountain. arthur, in all his holy parallels, like jesus passing the virgin mary off to john the beloved, arthur tells john it would make him very happy if [john] went to be with his family and left. arthur is passing his family off onto john, the same as jesus passed his family onto saint john. (this one hits harder if you know the rest of the "arthur is jesus" parallels and symbolism but i feel like those would be more impactful as a web weave, and i cant make one right now haha. most obvious one i can think of to support this though is arthur being a scapegoat, dying for the gangs sins.) remember these points they are the most important and will come back later.

reason number four: "but javier-!" shhhhshshsh lemme talk. yes. john is infinitely more intimate with javier than abigail. however, again, we must take the time period into account.

not that far off from many disgusting redpill communities today, back in the 1800s it was typically expected for men to socialize with men and women with women. there was a certain level of bonding you only had with your wife, as well as a certain level of bonding you only had with the men who were close to you. 

i have got to grab this fandom by the shoulders and say rockstar did not make these men as affectionate as they should have been with each other, and thats completely platonically. this is taking romance out of the equation, these men considered each other brothers and family. they were all in a cult together. they would have been very close, and also very affectionate! they would confide in each other and hold each other and cry to each other. they would make gifts for each other and sing and dance together. you can at least see them all pass around beer bottles between each other.

do i think john and javier are closer than most? yes absolutely. do i think javier is in love with john in some way? yes absolutely. do i think its romantic? ehhh maybe. do i think john loves javier? yes absolutely. do i think its romantic? ....noo not really. their whole dynamic reads as one sided through and through to me. even if they ever got together im sure they were quickly apart again, and i doubt the relationship would have been fulfilling in the ways javier would want, leaving him longing still.

the "ive always loved you, even now" immediately funneling into a crate being shoved onto john to knock him over can also be metaphorical- javiers love is disarming to john Because he does not know how to react to it. hes never known how to react to it. hes never known how to react to love from anyone, because "love" seems to feel so much different for everyone but him.

reason ff. fiiiiive. dear god. im sorry for this being this long: john loves. he clearly loves very hard. he was clearly wrecked by arthurs death, he would clearly crawl through hell for his family, he was clearly hurt because his love for javier eventually stabbed him in the back. however, to me, a lot of this love feels similar to the love john has for dutch, or arthur, really. its familial, its platonic, it sure as hell isnt romantic. (even if the games themselves like to joke about it being so lol.)

its just clear to me that he loves. he cant not love jack and abi after everything hes done for them. he cant not love javier after being so close for so long. but in the same vein, he cant not love dutch for the same reasons. ysee what i mean? his devotion to his wife and child feels identical to the devotion to dutch, compared to arthur, whos devotion to eliza and isaac directly went against his devotion to dutch.

much like with dutch, where john was still seen as a boy, he will ferociously do the big things for his family (saving jack, defending the ranch, tackling gangsters and robbers). he will almost always fail to do the little things that would make him a true man, though. yknow. winding down, relaxing, just working, not getting involved in fights. spending some time with his family maybe. 

he can shape up and be good, he just never does. 

and i think thats why hes so torn between leaving on his own, leaving with his family, or staying with the gang. theres no difference between romantic, platonic, or familial love for him. when arthur tells him to go be with his family and john replies "youre my brother" its not only announcing arthur as family, but i think it only reinforces that blurred line of what love is for john. "i love you the same as them, why must i leave you behind? if they are family and i love them, then you too must be family, for i love you."

point six: i hope you remembered the first few points like i told you to. you did remember right

this brings us back around to john not being a man by not being a romantic, arthurs family being passed off to him, and also john not wholly being himself later on. in the epilogue, between 1899 and 1908, we hear about how john has been unable to avoid trouble and has them on the run still. whenever abigail asks something of him, he instead goes and does what he wants. its only after she leaves him (ultimate failure of being a man) do we see him start to shape himself up again, and i would argue this shaping up increases substantially after he reunites with charles. charles sets him on the right path and reawakens that memory of arthur. i imagine being close to blackwater also helps here. id argue due to charles' apparent closeness with arthur, and then sudden closeness to john due to john being all thats left of arthur... it makes john also feel like hes all thats left of arthur. i believe after speaking with charles and thinking to himself, he decides to fulfill the one dream arthur had, seemingly, at the end: take care of the family he had lost. well, eliza and isaac are six feet in the dirt so next best option: abi and jack. 

john starts to become quieter and more in his own shell- by rdr1 hes struggling to even really ask people for help with the most basic things. he becomes a lot more of a romantic speaker. he had always used fancy words with the gang, but never with charismatic purpose in the way i feel he does in rdr1. he starts making the decisions he thinks arthur would make. as a result, the hole that arthur left behind when he died, does not get filled by john. instead it simply gets filled with whatever arthur john can muster from within himself.

id also like to bring up john being the favorite, but not the golden boy. he was the youngest and most spoiled, but he was not the one dutch turned to for just about everything. he was still living in arthurs shadow, so i imagine all of that also plays a role in johns choice to live like arthur to get his family back, to be a man. he failed at being a man by his own merits. arthur was a real man by his own merits, lets just do what we've always done and look up to our older brother about it. copy what he does. clearly hes got it all figured out, even though you know he didnt, after reading the journal. 

this all is finally bolstered by john making the choice to kill micah and repeat the VDL cycle of violence, which ruins the perfect life he made for himself. he makes another decision HE, not arthur, HE would make, and thus has to deal with the consequences. 

in conclusion: i think john loves a lot and very hard. hes passionate about these people. but in his own words towards javier that start to become readable as projection, "hes a cynic that wants to be a romantic" and "hes all passion, no love ('no love' being how he perceives it, due to the views of those around him. he loves abigail and jack, he loved arthur, though because his version of love was different than theirs, its not read as love. therefore, he has none in his own eyes)." 

all of this coupled with a detached attachment style that leaves him cold and distant leaves him being tugged along in romances he truthfully does not feel the same about. he says he does, because he loves, but he doesnt know why the love isnt the same. so, clearly, since he loves, he must want the romance. he has to perform it for love regardless of if he truly does want romance or not. if he loves, he must be a romantic, and hes failing at being a romantic, so he cant be himself. he must be someone else in order to convey his love to his family.

i hope i got everything across alright ^-^ feel free to ask questions or send more asks ive got plenty more where that came from

[luthienne]

what do you do for a living? (/job?) I am currently in a crisis and need some guidance. I look up to you a lot, I love your blog, we have the same passions for poetry and writing and music, even daredevil! My crisis is that I dont know what to do. In university I take classes but I dont know what I want to be. My art and writing feel pointless sometimes. All the jobs i want to do I know im not skilled enough to achieve or itd be very hard to get by. If you dont mind giving out advice... please help! ❤

hi anon <3 i think that figuring out what we're supposed to do for a living often gets tied to the idea that we're supposed to find that one niche in the world where we fit, where we're meant to be and where we're meant to contribute; where we're meant to shine, and find deep meaning in our own lives. and maybe that does happen for some people. but in reality i think we're all capable of doing many different things, and finding purpose in many different things. and in working toward many different skillsets we acquire different skillsets that apply to many other types of work.

and i don't think anything is ever set in stone. i got my undergrad & grad degrees in music, and then i found that i didn't have it in me to be a part of that world anymore. and i felt that i had no meaning in my life without it. i was No One without music, i had no identity outside of my voice—despite the deep sense of purpose and fate, even, that i felt for my life up until that moment in music, in singing, in acting. up until that moment i knew in my bones my purpose in life. and then the ground was swept out from under me. it didn't matter that i had known with certainty what my life was supposed to be because it wasn't that any longer. and i realized that i could never again tie my identity to my art, to my music, to my writing, to my job. my voice has a purpose not because it must be enough to sustain me financially or because enough people have validated my talent but because it brings me joy. i came back to music because singing brought me joy again; i thought i would never feel that again.

something i have learned through this is 1) music, like most other art forms, is not a meritocracy; there is no such thing as "you are an excellent [artist/singer/writer] and therefore you will have the career owed to you" because so much more than merit and hard work go into careers like this. it takes not only talent and work ethic but circumstance and luck and wealth. lessons cost money, coachings costs money, auditions cost money, applications cost money, travel costs money, wardrobe costs money. 2) the process is not the career. i love to practice, i love to learn music, i love to get into character, and to engage with my colleagues in rehearsal rooms and onstage. i don't love the abuse thrown at singers from directors and teachers and coaches, i don't love auditions, i don’t love the unpredictability of gig work and contract work, i don't love the expendable lens through which singers are viewed by the industry. i've come back to music but my goals have shifted.

all that to say, i don't think we have to know what we want to be. we don't have to want to be anything. our lives have deep meaning whether we have "successful" careers or careers that just pay the bills while we continue to pursue our creative loves. i wouldn't place too much importance on needing to find what you are supposed to be because you will become who you are supposed to be regardless. it is never a waste to pursue something we love, and we will acquire and internalize new skills in any field that we can apply to other fields. and maybe your interests will dramatically shift, or maybe not. i think it's very natural to have vocational shifts throughout our lives, and it's not indicative of failure. art that is made personally or professionally doesn't have more or less value based on its financial profit. the money i make from singing isn't enough to sustain me—i have to do other self-employment gigs to make up the difference. most artists do. but i don't regret the time and the heart i have invested in music, and i am sustained through the work i put into it, and sustained by the relationships and friendships that i have developed through it.

i send you my whole heart. i know how it feels to look at the future and not know what you're supposed to do with your one, precious life. sometimes we have to live in the uncertainty and know that it won't be like that forever. on the flip side, the moments of certainty won't last forever either. and in-between there is all the living we do. i promise you're not alone in this <3

[wishhalcyon]

Do you want to read HALCYON?

do you like...FREE BOOK NO STRINGS ATTACHED?!!?!?!?

if so im posting it online! but its not going to be as cleanly edited as my other works.

i only have like, a few things id like to request, and its kind of on an honor system i'm not going to really get mad or upset if you don't do it, but its something really sweet you can do to help me as an author!

but first a description of the book!

book is: about a not nessisarily romantic but definitely bizzarely close feel free to read it however you want im not making anyone kiss project whatever you want onto them, story of a bunny girl superhero with a murder problem , and her wholesome supervillain bestie who wants nothing more than to save her, with fun themes such as found family , memory loss, and of course, miserable children, also the supervillain is a theater kid with a heart of gold and a cup of tea <3

a mix of silly and serious, I put a lot of my heart into it! And it would have been done sooner, but well i kind of got kidnapped so that kind of slowed down most of my writing and other projects for a bit there, it was only for an afternoon, no one got hurt, but it was kind of weird. it was a sort of well intentioned kidnapping though and the lady who did it is getting professional help now which is great, so im just happy she and everyone else is okay :)

I made this book wanting to make a fun world and characters and setting and stuff anyone could enjoy and find interesting, and I think the magic system in place in this lil superhero book (based somewhat on magical girl anime-) will be a fun setting for fanfics and fanart and stuff, and im SUPER excited to see if anyone makes ocs or anything for it because that'd be super cool and I love seeing other people be creative-

anyways onto the rules.

if you read it, please reblog where you found it and that i'm the author, and tell me what you thought!

im posting this online *because i want to interact with people and share what i made with others*, and celebrate other peoples craeativity too in line with that, I dont want to sue you for writing ANY fanfiction or fanart you write about my story, as long as none of you don't try to sue ME if i get inspired by them and or make fanart of them or things like that myself. I want to be an active participant in whatever fandom may or may not form around this, I want to have fun with you guys and enjoy my story WITH you guys. this means you also MAY have more control over how any future things with halcyon goes, and you may be able to help guide some decision making! But I still own halcyon it's not public domain- like i dont nessisarily expect or think i 'deserve' (though it would be so cool) a fandom like that over my book, but i think itd be neat and as someone who really heavily participates in fandom, I really want to be a part of it if i have my own. A lot of times I and other readers are VERY bothered that companies and authors dont litsen to their fans...but oftentimes they legally CANT or theyll get sued.

(Though I still get the final say in any decisions since...my book)

3. If you make anything related to it or post about it at all pretty please @ me, i WANNA SEE ALL OF IT please dont be shy, please ask questions, please say hi to me, Im posting this online because i wanna talk about my blorbos with you, @ing me is like, the reader tax- gimme your headcannons and weird cursed creations, idc if youre photoshopping Acianne into the backrooms ominously or posting about like, alternate universe where Ciero's a rabbit who's wildly daydreaming all of this up, or if youve decided to make thirst traps of hearts, go ahead, @ me, I wanna see it, if i suffer the cost so be it. Carve a watermelon to look like Cieros dad and throw it at the concrete, go splat. just go wild, have fun, just like, no hateful stuff and everyone be nice to each other.

4. im doing this partially with the thought that i could mostly make money off this via selling my own art of it and possibly a game based on halcyon...if so, then i may just post any future books online too, any thoughts guys? are these fair rules? any additions youd add? things like that? thoughts? I also have other books that I plan to publish more traditionally, This is kind of a test to see what works best really. I guess! If this takes off i might stick to free books only, if not, well publishing traditionally it is, whatever I need to do to get by you know? gotta make a living.

the biggest rule is just dont sue me please or pursue me legally im just trying to be a silly lil author who actually engages with their fandom and can get away with it i dont want to steal your stuff, i want to share headcannons with you guys and confirm or deny stuff and give you sneak peaks and PLEASE I JUST WANT TO READ FANFICTIONS WITHOUT BEING SUED IT WOULD MAKE ME SO HAPPY I LOVE FANFICTIONS LET ME FANDOM WITH YOU GUYS I DONT WANT TO BE SHADY PLEASE BY READING MY BOOK LETS JUST HAVE FUN PLEASE- CAN WE PRETTY PLEASE ???? FANFICTIONS ARE SUCH A VALUABLE AND EXCITING FORM OF LITERATURE- AND THEY MAKE ME SO HAPPY SO PRETTY PLEASE BE NICE THANKS

remember DONT RUIN IT FOR EVERYONE ELSE BY SUING ME FOR GIVING YOU SOMETHING TO ENJOY, if you want nice things, don't misuse the nice things!!!! okay? okay so everyone agrees to be nice?...okay then! enjoy!

Ciero/Darling says "Please enjoy chapter 1~"

PLEASE ENJOY CHAPTER ONE I PLAN TO POST THE OTHER CHAPTERS DONT WORRY IM NOT JUST DANGLING A WORM IM JUST TRYING TO EDIT IT AND THERES A LOT OF WORDS SO IT MAY TAKE A BIT OKAY- SO YOURE GETTING IT ONE CHAPTER AT A TIME

: ) enjoy! and tell me your thoughts please <3 all i ask in return for letting you have a free book is some validation and maybe sharing it iwth others if you want-

full book is about 49 almost 50k words :) so look forward to it! it's all written i'm just trying to clean them up with a rough edit through before posting them-

also sorry for emphasising dont sue me so much but im trying to cover myself as much as I can safely I REALLY love writing and my favorite part of it is engaging with my readers, but ive been scared of doing this for a while out of fear thanks to a lot of horror stories ive read online. so please dont be mean : (

[fullmetal-scar-simping]

feasting on all the fantastic au/oc discussion that happens to share several commonalities with my own Scar As A Major Protagonist AU (that i swear im working on very slowly. i just have the curse of perfectionism and i keep going back and reworking things when i should be WRITING,) and its making me want to share my ideas too....

the general starting premise is that instead of getting abducted by bradley, greed manages to escape the raid on the devils nest with bido, and then via a series of dominos the two of them wind up teaming up with mei and then scar shortly thereafter

the entire idea kind of spun out of thinking about how scar would react to actually getting to know a human chimera. his pity for nina– similar to how he seems to view al– is such a goldmine for character exploration to me, because hes gotta be projecting right

like despite the obvious differences in their respective situations, from scars pov he might as well be just as inhuman as nina is, except HE isnt Allowed to die yet because he has a Duty to fulfill. which is both the last thread of self preservation hes grasping at and also a thing he hates himself for doing. its this big tangled up knot of religious guilt and survivors guilt and internalized ableism and the fact that he cant blame his brother for saving him so instead he makes a monster out of himself. and i think if he had the chance to come to terms with a chimera as still being human in all the ways that matter, and talking about those complicated body-humanity-autonomy feelings with someone who gets it on some level, maybe it could help him start to rebuild his sense of personhood

and. just generally. i think if he had more people to hang out with on the regular than Snitchy McLandlord, Self-Flagellant Genocide Collaborator, and One Literal Child. He might maybe perhaps have had better self esteem by the time the moral-superiority-in-incrementalism lecture hall power hour rolled around.

i too am killing kimblee early. scar unfortunately doesnt get to him, but he does get shot, impaled, and finally fall down a big hole and die, which i think is almost as good

scar DOES get to kill envy though. because roy "im mad you killed this one guy i liked. genocide what genocide" mustang doing it was just not as deep a plot point as people think it was. the fight with wrath was good, but i think itd be interesting to end his vengeance quest more somberly- not facing an equally-matched opponent, but putting down a pathetic, weak, spiteful thing that refuses to grow or change

uhhh what else. oh right. mei also takes the throne here, since ling never gets the stone (despite his continued efforts. his character arc is shaped like that of a pendulum. im making him worse) and i think with her at the helm, amestris would have way less leverage in any post-canon negotiations with ishval

Sure of course your super huge and powerful neighbor will help reestablish the cross-desert railroad and enrich your failing economy..... IF and ONLY IF you adhere to ALL the stipulations put forth by the ishvalan leadership council ^_^ the gun im holding? dont worry about it

im giving him so many cats when everythings said and done, however to his consternation hes doomed to wind up a beloved pillar of the community instead of just some guy who gets to hang out with cats. theres a renewed independence movement to organize & also a burgeoning faction of people who argue that because scar uses alchemy and hes cool, maybe god is cool with alchemy some of the time, like as long as youre responsible, to which scar is at the forefront of every debate desperately telling them I Am An Outlier Adn Should Not Have Been Counted

Hell yeah, more AU goodness! 🤩 Trust me, not only do I understand your pain in being caught in a perfectionism loop, but you'll get no judgment from me about taking your time with it too.

Super ecstatic that you decided to share what you've got cooking, so let's go:

Starting off with Greed and Bido is very on brand 😌 Glad he escapes getting liquified and drunken by his core self. I assume that some other members of the Devil's Nest crew survive as well? Or are they all slaughtered, same as in canon? If it's just the two of them left, then man, that's gonna hurt (and the angst~). Maybe we get a revelation that some survived later on?

I dig that Bido and Greed bump into Mei first. I wonder how fresh her arrival in Amestris must be before bumbling into an entire wayward homunculus and human-chimera. Meeting Scar after that would seem so normal in comparison lol

Oh- Oh! Omg wait, that's a fantastic angle to explore. That really taps into his self-hatred in such a unique way that I never thought about before! Alchemy is already a heresy for him that which he cannot separate from himself due to his brother's arm being the sacrifice that saved his life. Yet why wouldn't he see the sanctity of his own body as having been marred by this grave taboo to the point that he hardly sees it as truly human? If he can use this tainted gift to exact vengeance against everyone who tore Ishval to shreds, than even his unholy, "desecrated" body can be put to use. But the way this lashes out against both himself and others who don't want to die simply because someone/the state forcibly transmuted them with other living beings- damn, that's juicy

No seriously, this fuckin' rules! Using the chimera angle to really crack open the darkest pit inside of him, and how Scar's one vestige of purpose is what keeps him from succumbing to his self-flagellating dehumanization. I love that you're looking at this via survivor's guilt, the conundrums of his piety, and even the ableism imbedded in the assumptions on what constitutes a "worthy" body.

On the latter point: I'm curious to see if I understand the every facet of the ableism angle. Is it that chimerification can be seen as a disability brought on by alchemical experimentation (which I can definitely see) in contrast to Scar seeing it as an irrevocable perversion and assault on the human form, thus (in his mind) dooming the victim to be fully inhuman and in need of euthanization? Because again, I can see this as a loaded assumption on a "proper human body" vs a "destroyed, unworthy body", but I feel like I could be missing other potential readings here 🤔 It feels like it's that plus more. Hmmm

Yes, Bido (and maybe some other chimeras?) gets to help Scar navigate the messy bodily-autonomy-humanity Gordian Knot. Surely that has to unravel slowly (it's less Gordian than it may seem lol), since I imagine Scar's initial reaction to Bido must be a... heightened, perhaps pejorative one. To me I would imagine it to be quite dehumanizing (if not outright threatening) towards the poor lizard chimera man. :( Not that Greed would let anything happen to him, but then again Greed revealing himself to be a homunculus would also have to throw Scar for a loop too. We all know Greed can't shut his yap about being one, if he thinks he'll get a rise from someone who can even grasp what that is. Shame he maybe doesn't have Roa around to sledgehammer his entire cranium to smithereens. Unless? (Either that or I imagine that, given potential misgivings, Scar attempts to disintegrate Greed's head and gets the revelation of his homunculus nature right there and then.)

Wait, now I'm just recalling how cold Scar had been upon first meeting Mei when she was chilling with Yoki in canon. (I don't blame him, I'd also ask that bumbling mustachioed twat why the hell there's a random kid hiding out with them.) But now this tween shows up with a homunculus AND a chimera? Dude must have wanted to walk into the ocean lol

LMFAOOOOO STOPPP the way you described the canon party Scar had to travel with 😭😭😭 And the fucking "moral-superiority-in-incrementalism lecture hall power hour" PLEASE

Though tbh yeah, he needed some other folks to bounce off of who weren't former state actors, and, much as Mei is an absolute treasure, some adult company who also don't see him as a monster or a threat (to the extent Yoki and Marcoh do) would be very good for him. This is assuming that he and Bido are on solid terms sooner rather than later, but if Scar still struggles with being around chimeras for some time than maybe it would only be Greed who doesn't shrink in Scar's presence (besides the best kid ever, Mei, who never feared or distrusted him 😌).

Oh man, Mei might not realize that she's become travel buddies with a walking philosopher's stone. :0 Or does she immediately grasp that homunculi hold a stone within their bodies?

A standing ovation is needed for the death you're serving that pompous fascist Kimblee, and then an encore for good measure too. Stupendous, magnificent, and fully deserved. 10/10 The big hole at the end really cements his fate as comedic poetry, really. Scar may not get that personal catharsis, but he should get a front row seat to enjoy the carnage all the same. (Not suggesting that Scar has to be in the scene, just imagining him getting a theatre all to himself with the murder playing on loop while he snacks on some popcorn.)

Scar killing Envy is an intriguing change. Fully agreed that Mustang setting Envy ablaze wasn't that deep, and frankly a pretty lousy scene too. And yeah, Scar getting to fight and kill Wrath in canon was surprisingly good, but given Envy's hand in exploiting the tension of the occupied Ishvalans to jumpstart their genocide, it feels far more relevant to have Scar put them down than fucking Mustang. Envy's writhing pathetic self contrasted to Scar's typically quiet, self-contained demeanour- of course this is coming off of the canon again. However that fight or scene shakes out in your AU may or may not have Scar in that same emotional state.

Ling being denied the stone and what that does to his character isn't explored enough (bless these AUs). "im making him worse" ough that's enticing. Does Ling spiral? Does the worst in him begin to claw through the surface as he more desperately vies for whatever stone is in reach? His position as a moral paragon crumbling as he flails for the seat of power he desires, with his greed looking less and less admirable would be *chef's kiss*

Which makes me realize that the stone that propels Mei into the head of the Xingese empire wouldn't be Greed's stone, right? Perhaps it's Envy's?

But yesssss, Mei leveraging her new power to force Amestris to adhere to the Ishvalan council's demands! No need to worry about the gun, since it's symbolic of the sheer economic devastation that would sweep Amestris if they refuse Ishval whatsoever. :3c

The last bullet point-!!!

Scar gets to have his DOZENS of cats, and and he gets to be LOVED and RESPECTED, he's a- *sniffs* he's a PILLAR of his COMMUNITY- *breaks down into a sobbing fit*

But yes! The Ishvalan Independence Movement is underway and it needs him! He wouldn't let his people down at such an integral point in Ishval's history and future. And I'm goin nuts over the fact that some people are beginning to see alchemy with some renewed nuance, much to the chagrin of Scar, as he sits central to this shift in perspective. Despite what he's seen of Ishvalan alchemy and Xingese alkehestry (fuck Amestrian alchemy, no I don't care that all alchemic practices stem from Hohenheim and Xerxes stfu it's cultural drift goddammit) Scar still being adamant in the teachings he's followed all his life is very in-character. But I can see that slowly eroding and making way for some greater peace with his own brandishing of alchemy alongside his greater acceptance of his body and where his soul sits in Ishvala's eyes. 🥹 And all the cats. All the damn cats he could ever nurture and cuddle!

Ugh I love this AU too! I know you wanted to give me the Scar-centric details, but I'm big time curious about Greed and Bido's side of things. Where this journey takes them, what they have to contend with and what they lose and gain in the process, and what becomes of them. Does Greed get to live on even with the decimation of Father and the other homunculi? Do they rebuild the Devil's Nest? Can Bido live comfortably and openly as a chimera the way the four chimera-men do, or is he destined to continue living in society's underbelly due to not having been 'designed' (so to speak) to shift between a fully human morphology and his animal-infused morphology?

Many many apologies for the time it took to reply. U_U I loved going over the details you've layed out and I can't wait to one day read it 👀 The day this fic starts getting posted I'll be there!

[meruz]

another ask post

i mean i also read it because a friend whos rly into queer SFF fiction circles recced it but she did kinda lead with "the writer used to write hs fanfic...tasmyn..taz...?" to which i replied

of COURSE I read the locked tomb because i heard taz had written a book. of course. ill consume most any media made by a beloved homestuck bnf. thats also why i played undertale. and read like..snotgirl. and idk... watched the new dub of neon genesis evangelion.

if u made homestuck fanwork 10 years ago and havent even made it since chances are I still remember and I love you for it.

sdlkfhsg its funny you sensed that because that drawing did in fact start kinda more........ well, I'd be lying if I said my hands never wrought a drawing toeing over the pg-13 line LOL...

NOT to say i have a secret stash of porn or anything. in general im more interested in the implication of sexuality or mature themes over any explicit depiction. like everything i draw is so softcore itd almost feel silly to make a nsfw acc for anything.

but im not rly jumping to post anything on main either bc i get the sense i have a lot of kids in my social media following. it varies from site to site and fandom to fandom but the themes in my work often circle around childhood, coming of age etc and in general i like stories about kids so the fandoms i draw for have a lot of kids in them. even stuff like IT (stephen king) which is about kids but isn't necessarily for kids.. there were a lot of kids in that fandom lol.

actually thats why ive been censoring swears in comics lately because the tmnt fandom comes across to me as a little young...IDK I've had MULTIPLE people ask me what "sodomize" means because of the joke in this post and I'm like... I Cannot be the one to explain this to you. you have to look it up on your own klfsdhsdg like i wouldn't be doing this if i were doing a comic for mgs or even homestuck wherein the characters textually swear constantly LOL but sometimes u gotta change tacks depending on the faces u see in the crowd yknow.

i HAVE been thinking abt drawing nsfw of sunspot/richard rider/kobak from x-men red just because that comic seemed to be really asking for it. who knows.. if the need rly arises maybe my separate account policy will change.

its rly more a matter of the fact that i havent read/watched much of any other iterations... im sure id like most lol. I like most things related to my interests regardless of quality. i rly like the marvel ultimate alliance games for instance. sometimes seeing my fave guy is enough he doesnt have to be well written LOL. i dont exactly have a wealth of free time tho thats the real impediment.

i did watch the 2007 movie on new years eve and found it quite charming overall. and i have read about 30-40 issues between the mirage and idw comics. still feels like im barely scratching the surface but i liked em. i rly want to read all the sophie campbell stuff bc i think her work is interesting. jason aaron will be a mixed bag i think lmao. i say as the worlds biggest Wolverine and the X-Men (2011) fan.

hmm this is kinda hard bc i feel like i naturally draw very loose and the hard part for me is tightening it up. maybe some suggestions tho...

1) hand excercises. i think its easy to forget this when many artists sit in front of the computer all day but drawing is a physical activity u do with ur actual...bodys...muscles lol. if u feel urself tightening up it might help to strech (any google search for "artist hand excercises" should yield good results) or do a page of loose practice strokes like..big circles. long lines. scribbles. that kinda thing. whatever feels good for ur hand. this is also just good to do as a general warm up before u sit down for any drawing sesh.

2) draw further away from the canvas. as a general rule...when ur painting traditionally you do the big strokes with your whole arm outstreched and a long handled brush. and when you do the details its smaller wrist movements and a shorter handled brush. so it might help to take a step back or push back from ur chair a little.. or hold ur tablet a little further away. and hold your pen further away from the nib.

3) change mediums / brush types. some brushes and mediums are more suited to loose sketching and some more inclined towards detail work. so changing ur tool could help. also! i personally have this problem where sometimes if im using a brush i feel really familiar with the pressure to make a "good" "finished" "perfect" drawing is greater... if i want to force myself to loosen up ill switch to a tool i dont use as often so it feels like the pressure is off. a lot of times for me this is switching from digital to traditional. but sometimes its switching from a small pen to a big marker. or a smooth pen to a textured one. or a nice brush to a shitty dried up marker.

but also every body is different so i dont think these tips will work for everyone. u should listen to what ur body and mind tell u and how drawing feels to you

bro just sign up and set it up i dont think theres much to it... i dont rly think too much abt my itch.io store because its digital goods so u just upload the file and let it do its thing. no distribution work needed on ur part. youll notice i barely even advertise my itch unless i have smth new on there lol.. its easy. but good luck!!!

idk if im the best person to ask this im more a comic fan than i am a comic professional... a comic hobbist.

well. scott mcclouds understanding comics and making comics are good books on the craft. i think i had to buy them for a class in art school once.

other than that idk just keep at it. comics are really laborious i think for a lot of people the hardest part is sitting down and doing it.

i think a lot of people have a very instinctive understanding of how to read comics and what they look like so whatever you think seems like good way to tell the story you have in mind, its probably right. if u get stuck, study comics that have done something similar. most people in comics are relatively self taught and actually it can be problematic bc you can tell when a lot of comic artists are all copying the same like 5 old white guys LMAO. but on the flip side if you make sure to reference and study broadly your comics will almost assuredly feel unique.

sorry im responding to this anyways. this is just a really nice ask. i like when people reference my older work bc i feel like sometimes theyre subtly implying it wasnt very good LMAOOO. but its true! at least compared to the work i make now ^^ and the fact that im still making art is whats keeping me from being embarassed abt how much of my old art just floats around online lmao im never ashamed to be growing and learning. isnt that a nice thought <3

[suffarustuffaru]

Do you have any advice for writing in the second person pov as well as advice about writing reinhard? I’m trying to write a second person pov fic from his perspective and I’m a bit lost?

yes i can do my best to give you advice!! :o hah im really flattered you thought to ask me on this? but yes i absolutely love both writing in second person (i havent written a whole finished fic in second person, but ive dabbled in it a few times, ive also started writing poetry on the side) and also of course i love reinhard!! im super super interested in the fact that youre doing a SECOND PERSON POV REINHARD FIC like woaaahhh hes definitely a fun character to choose pov wise and combining it with second person is genius. i really like it and would love to read it if you ever wanna share it when youre done <3

and yes quick disclaimer that im no professional writer but yes ill give my two cents!! and another disclaimer is that creative writing is a very individualized thing i think. theres no like one way to do things, and of course you can take any advice or criticism that youd like if you think itd help <3

ill get into second person pov first then talk more specifically about reinhard 👍

yes anyway tips on second person!! i do kinda recommend to like look at various examples of second person pov being used in various written pieces if thats something youd like to do - poetry and song lyrics use second person a LOT. especially songs, bc once you see it you cant really unsee it, i think? of course writing a narrative story is different from poetry and songwriting but it could help you give a frame of reference, or inspiration, or decide what you want to do and what you dont want to do. most importantly you could also look at other second person fics or published stories that are written in second person!!

and alright so - in general, second person is a very personal pov to choose in a way thats different from first person and third person. in first person and third person, theres still a degree of separation between the reader and the character the story is following. second person almost kind of removes that barrier bc of the use of "you" - the reader is being directly put into the character's shoes. as in, "you're" doing this, "you're" thinking this, etc etc. bc its such a personal pov, different readers might have different feelings about this (second person pov in fics is a pet peeve for some people for one reason or another), and youve committed yourself to writing second pov, you might as well go all in!! as a reader, i would be directly in that character's skin, basically, and i think its good to lean into the character youre writing especially with second person. bc theres even less separation between reader and character!! its kind of like the general pov advice of - who is this character, whats their personality like, what are they thinking, why should i care, etc etc. whats their inner world like? what is this telling me about their character?

another thing - you can choose between writing past or present tense of course, and the choice is up to you there, but i think present tense may fit second person pov more. with second person, youre directly addressing the reader for the entire story. theres a difference in urgency between "You gritted your teeth and fought off the attack" and "You grit your teeth and fight off the attack", i think. youre already putting your reader in such a personal position with the pov character - i think present tense might aid in it a lot more. another disclaimer that this is my opinion of course - but yes, i think that it also may be harder for people to suspend their disbelief with second person pov in certain circumstances. if i read past tense second person i might stop for one second and go "no, i did not grit my teeth and fight off some random attack in my past". in present tense i might be more likely to go "huh, yeah ig im fighting off this attack now. oh snap, hows this gonna go?"

of course, this isnt to say that you cant do past tense second person. as a second person pov fan i would absolutely eat up any second person fic regardless of the tense or not so long as your choice of tense stays consistent throughout the entire story (unless of course you have a good reason to change tenses mid-story). but i think that a good amount of second person works are in present tense, maybe for this very reason, unless the second person is combined with first person in like a song or something (basically every time the narrator of a song addresses the "you", like for example something like this sentence: "you broke up with me last summer"). or maybe the character is thinking about something they did in the past, so in reinhard's case it could look like "Remember when you killed your own grandmother all those months ago?" or something like that.

yeah, so - second person pov is a bit of a bold choice. it's inherently very personal and intimate. and i think theres also like the general advice of like - imo, don't use "you" too much. i know that sounds counterintuitive given this is second person pov hah but its kind of similar with something like first person - don't use "I" too much. and that also combines with the general advice of "vary your sentences". it can be awkward if every sentence has the same length and starts off the same way with the same rhythm, like this - "You go to the grocery store. You open the door. You step inside. You walk into the store."

(and quick disclaimer that if youre intending to go for that kind of monotonous sound for a part of/a lot of your story for various reasons, definitely go for it if its on purpose! i myself have done it a bit before to show a character kind of going through the motions, so to speak)

and with second person, absolutely utilize sentences or phrases or what have you that dont use "you" at all!! i think its called "implied" second person - stuff like "Look at that wall" or "Hand over that paper". so you can absolutely highlight second person pov without even using the word "you" at all and its also good to switch things up when youre writing to add a more "dynamic" quality to your work (and itll probably be fun for you to do if thats something youre into!!). so while narrative pronouns like this wont usually grate on your reader (bc we gotta use pronouns all the time for a reason, so using it a lot isnt a problem whatsoever and i highly doubt anyones gonna notice how much theyre used), definitely keep in mind not to overdo it at every turn, if that makes sense. its like the word "said" or "says" - hardly anyone is gonna notice it unless youre using it for Every Single Dialogue Line In A Row, but otherwise use it as much as you want.

getting creative with your sentence structure and the way you tell the story is important of course regardless of the pov youve chosen - and also hah sorry if that sounds really obvious but i do think its really important to remember!! :o second person may be different and less commonly used in narrative stories compared to first or third person, but some of the same rules are still gonna apply in a sense -

i think getting creative with sentences and description is even more important in second person. with first person and third person you can still have all these varying degrees of separation, especially with third person - there's like a "distant" third person that doesn't really go as far into the character's heads as much as "close" third person, where the entire third person narration can vaguely mimic the character's inner thoughts and feelings and worldviews.

second person, i think, from the get go, can mimic thoughts even more sometimes, if thats an angle you want to take - i mean have you ever like, had thoughts that were directed towards yourself or have you ever talked to yourself? or seen others do this? im talking about stuff like telling yourself "good job" or going "look what you did" at yourself in disappointment? theres also the "instructional" angle - a lot of instructions are written in second person, and a second person narrative can sound kinda like that just bc youre directly addressing your reader so much. it could definitely be fun to lean into all of this if you wanted - especially since youre writing reinhard (whos unfortunately brainwashed and conditioned to hell and back in every area of his life :<).

and second person is such a specific pov that i think you have to keep in mind why youre using second person. what is your intent in using this specific pov for this specific story? how is the story aided by your choice of pov? and i think its an extremely interesting choice for reinhard, who, as i said and as you definitely know - dudes got issues surrounding being controlled by the literal government and being pushed around!! hes a dog on a leash!! hes spent almost his whole life being ordered around everywhere, and on like, a human level maybe, hes one of the hardest people to understand.

bc yknow - reinhards dps of course give him this really unique perspective of the world. as we know, hes the FURTHEST thing for normal bc of his powers and they affect everything about his life - his relationships with other people of course but also how he perceives the world. hes perfect at Everything, he can do a whole long list of things that almost no one else can, he gets new powers every time he needs one for a given situation, he cant even fuck up telling salt from sugar, he cant lose any board game, etc etc dudes just powerless in Every Other Area of his life except for the long list of powers.

and yknow, bc of this and also trauma hes detached from others no matter how hard he tries to bridge that gap between him and other people. its why he wants to be normal so bad!! he wants friends and he likely wants freedom (why follow FELT of all royal candidates… he's 100% staked his family's redemption on her especially when you remember rom and the astrea's connection to the demihuman war, heinkel being rumored to kidnap a royal family member, reid, etc) but yknow. he cant get freedom so easily :(

which im sure you already knew all of this hah, tumblr user whygodwhy (amazing url btw) (im also saying this bc you seem like a big astrea fan as well and youve been around on rz tumblr from what i can see <3), but definitely great to keep in mind for your writing purposes bc a second person fic with (one of) THE most “inhuman” (heavy emphasis on the quotation marks here) character in rezero??? thats absolutely DIABOLICAL (complimentary) i love it. its an absolutely genius idea - we're really being pushed into understanding reinhard's perspective of having powers that make you kind of like a god. and then it makes everyone around you think youre a monster :(((

but yes like - reinhards character sets up the perfect foundation for a second person pov fic. like you can really get creative with how he experiences the world in ALL SORTS of extremely extremely off putting ways and therefore how we the reader experience REINHARD'S experiences. its super cool!!!

and i definitely think that its up to you on how you want to interpret reinhard - i think that generally even with fic authors who try to stick as closely to canon characterization as possible theres still a bit of variance you know? :o which i think is really fascinating!! especially when you take into account writing styles and all that, and especially when you take into account reinhard as a character.

atm he hasnt had a moment in rezero canon where we actually read from his pov and iirc its bc tappei said that reinhard just kinda knows Spoilery stuff? correct me if im wrong on that of course. and also iirc tappei also said that reinhard is Generally honest about what he says, so the way i see people (including myself...) write reinhard's pov matches pretty similarly with his outward self most of the time? but apart from that yknow interpret reinhard how youd like and if youre writing some sort of au or having him develop in a certain way (that isnt seen in canon), definitely go for it!! theres of course a fine balance between developing a character vs changing them to the point where it doesnt feel like the same character, but once you get to know that Base Characterization you can figure out how to go about developing them while still making them feel like themselves if thats something youre interested in!!

and for example, i think you could get creative with how using his powers looks like from his pov!! (some of which he just. doesnt think about in the sense that it just Happens - like that one dp he has where he just Knows where the exits of the building hes in are or that other dp where things thrown at him just automatically misses him.) or you know depending on what the plot for your fic is - how do you think he sees people like heinkel, wilhelm, subaru, etc, based on how he outwardly acts towards them? bc we havent seen reinhards exact pov yet in canon its kind of free real estate rn HAH and even then its fanfic, you can do what you want.

but yknow if you want to stick closer to canon, theres def the high probability that reinhard is usually honest about what he says (so his thoughts on things likely match up with what he says out loud about that exact thing). and in general if youre willing to and havent done so already i think you could check out more reinhards side stories and reinhards qnas from tappei. of course stuff like qnas you might have to take with a grain of salt (since its word of god and not always in the text yet) but you may see details that youd like to keep in mind or even use in your fic!!

and i think its good in general to make your own interpretation and know how you want to write reinhard based on that interpretation. i also recommend if you want to to maybe check out other reinhard pov fics to maybe find some inspiration or note how youd also want to interpret reinhards pov. you could note stuff like "hey, i like how this author describes how reinhards dp of empathy works" or "i like how matter of fact reinhards internal dialogue sounds here" - that sort of thing. but i definitely do think that if you want to be in character, definitely try to come to your own conclusions as well based on canon!!

as for other general advice, rereading or rewatching reinhard scenes may help you as well. i definitely recommend taking mental or physical (whether youre typing it up or writing it down physically) notes or something if that would help you. something that personally helps me (and you can do this if you want) is that every time im trying to learn a characters dialogue and how they usually speak is that i go to reread/rewatch a scene theyre in. i usually choose english dub if i can since im writing in english and then i just note down stuff like what kind of words they use, what reoccurring words or phrases do they use a lot, etc etc. so if youre struggling with dialogue or something, this is something you could try!!

reinhard does speak a little professionally/formally, with a little emotional distance, if that makes sense (i think the most obvious example is him Sounding too composed after dying and coming back in arc 5?). like the dude sounds like hes in customer service mode Near Constantly, if that also makes sense (....well he IS the sword saint HAH), even if hes actually upset about something. i think one of the biggest cracks in his customer service facade though is when hes either quietly depressed in front of his family or when he gets upset about the arc 3 julisuba duel (like he actually RAISES HIS VOICE A BIT and is obviously upset when talking to subaru after the duel. literally insane). also ofc when hes in serious "damn i guess you gotta die" mode :(

but yes i think that reinhard speaks formally but he tries to be way more casual about it yknow? julius is the one whos more flowery, that pretentious prick!!! (affectionate) (read this line in a subaru voice). reinhard will be like "hello, it's nice to meet you :) oh, please, call me reinhard :)))) no need for honorifics, we are friends here :)))) (pls treat me like a normal person ahahahah im begging you) (we're friends right? pls be my friend. pretty pls. im begging -)" and julius will be like "It is a pleasure to make your acquaintance." bc hes flowery <33 a slight purple prose thats as purple as his hair (affectionate)

and yep as for internal dialogue, again, you can interpret how reinhard would think in a lot of different ways and its up to you on how you want to explore him and what we know of him from canon so far!!

and you know, a lot of writing is just a lot of practice, and i guarantee you that the more you write a character the more comfortable youll get!! speaking as someone who has done so much writing in private to get comfortable with writing dialogue for people like otto or reinhard or subaru (and even then i still try really hard to adjust if i feel theyre getting out of character hah, theyre still hard to write fr :<). so yeah i def recommend to you know just give your best go at it and have fun while you do!! you can always go back and edit and if you need a betareader or smth you can def ask around. i would be down if you needed one!!

also i did write a small little blurb if you want an example of combining how to write second pov and how to write reinhard :O !! i do think that every writer is different of course but i just wanted to leave an example just in case itd help you!! i Think this is well written enough for example purposes hah:

Remember when you killed your grandmother all those months ago? Fist through her chest, familial blood splattering all over your only family. As her body falls limp, Grandfather catches her right when she’s gasping out her last words and turning to dust like the ash left in the wake of when you first killed her years ago.

The only difference is that it was a necessary evil this time.

yep so - in conclusion, fuck around (research various things if you need to) and find out (practice and have fun) <333 i hope this helps and feel free to reach out if you ever wanna ask more stuff :o !!

[quaranmine]

Hi yeah its me again, sorry for the spam, not my fault you made cool and inspiring stuff. This time actually, i couldnt help myself and have made a short crackpodfic of an alternative universe which is basically 'AU where Mumbo is frolicking in the wild and Grian doesnt exist cause itd be too sad for him to do so, so hes gone.' Its stupid, ist badly written (literally my first ever creative writing work other than a 300 word school asignment) but like idk. if you dont want to or cant read it (cause its so bad and burns your eyes out) you can just not read it xd idc honestly but decided to maybe give you the choice of reading it or not. Excuse my weird and unusual ways of writing dialougue and monolouges This is part 1 of 3

Jellie meowed cutely, demanding for food most likely just as a familar figure walked into his cabin. —Oh Hello Cub! It's wonderful to see you again! How was the trail, you're earlier than usual, no? — Scar exclaimed happily, looking at the sweaty man now standing before him. The air was hot, the many glass windows of the watchtower could make a great greenhouse. The open windows allowed for a warm flow of the early summer's air to pass by and refresh the mostly closed space. —Hey hey. Yeah the traffic was better than usual, but there was more sand in on the trail today. I think it could be the Sahara desert dust that was supposed to get carried in with the wind. — Cub said, taking his backpack off and pulling out a rag to wipe his head off. No matter how many times he hikes through this trail it never gets much easier. — Oh, Cub. The Sahara desert was blowing on Europe! And also it's the 80s and this specific situation you're referencing is gonna happen in late March of the year 2024! That's at least 35 years into the future! —Oh yup I forgot. Sorki bout that —Cub, you silly silly man! — Scar said in a singsong tone. Both of them started laughing and looked straight into the readers eyes, smiling.  Hi reader they both thought and went back to laughing looking at each other. — Actually, Scar, while hiking I heard some tourists talking about some newfound cryptid roaming these parts, what's up with that? – Eh nothing special, some bikers saw a 'humanoid lanky bugman' or something. — The man said — I've seen it all over, people come, they see a black bear or a deer in the shadow and think it's a newfound species. But honestly! I gotta give credit to the bikers relating said encounter cause the guys were better than most at storytelling! The missing food cans, rustling in the bushes all around them, the feeling of being watched.. Truly creepy stuff! And then — Scar took in a breath, talking so much in one long exhale left him almost dizzy —the moment when they saw it fully...They described it as 'particularly lanky with black fur' and something about purple-pinkish fingertips as well as residue on its paleish naked face with a weirdly shaped snout. 'Like a Walrus' they said! A crazy comparison for a bear, but you know, human mind can do wonders! — Scar clapped at the last statement and closed his eyes smiling charmingly at his companion who was now drinking the rest of his water.. After a while, comfortable silence filled the watchtower as both of the men enjoyed eachothers company. Jellie was now purring against scars leg and promptly jumped on his lap demanding more pets as Cub had finally spoken up — Any new paintings done in the meantime? I don't recognise these two, are they new or recycled? — He asked, curiosity clear in his voice, lookin at the, indeed, two new paintings decorating the cabin. One of them depicting a landscape with a sunset. From where Cub was sitting, he could watch the same, now hidden under an overcast, mountains and trees. The other painting was of a group of three tufted titmice sitting on a branch. Cub took out his American bird field guy and read a couple of paragraphs to scar on what kind of bird has he drawn exactly. It's weird that he saw these birds cause apparently they don't live in that part of the US! Crazy.

HELPPPPP this is completely insane the best way, thank you. Love that Grian doesn't exist here because it'd be too sad for him. Love the fever-dream quality to the writing. In all the best ways you're taking me back to the crack fics I'd read on ff.net in 2013, it's great. Love the breaking the fourth wall abou the Sahara dust and the (assuming) European birds. You've got a certain hint of Douglas Adams flavoring happening with the switching to an "above" perspective for a moment to give a wry little fourth-wall comment.

Mumbo Jumbo, new forest cryptid. I can see it. If Hermitcraft!Mumbo eats redstone, do you think forest cryptid!Mumbo would eat like...rocks??? dlfjskfljslkfs

[chirpins]

your vampire noah au has me hooked immediately, i had to come here and ask you questions after reading.

first things first, your half vampire tag. what exactly does that entail? it could mean anything. are there going to be other character's who are a vampire?

secondly, what are the other ships mentioned in the tags? are they going to be important enough to mention any time soon? or can we know them now.

thirdly, is this going to be based off of stakes? with its recent departure from the fandom, a lot of people are missing it. is there a reason you posted this when you did, so close to its deletion?

is fourthly a word?

fifthly, what does the soulmate tag mean? i've never seen it used in that way before.

sixthly (?), can you tell us anything about it? fun facts, i mean.

seventhly (i'm just winging it at this point), does noah being bitten on his ankle have any plot relevance to it? given that it wasn't on his neck?

that's all i can think of for now.

woaaah this is like .. one of the longest asks ive ever seen. sorry it took me so long to reply, i really had to think on how i would respond to this..!

well, lets start in order.. lets seeee..

mm i dont know if i can answer this in a way that isnt spoilery or holds plot relevance. sorry if that doesnt help ur curiosity, but rest assured it will be addressed in the fic itself so .. just stay tuned!

i dont see how it would be any spoilers to say this, so ill just come out and do so already! one of the main background ships is geoff/gwen/bridgette. they are just so cute to me, and id like to make it clear the three of them are all dating each other. there is also going to be eva/izzy, of course; and owen/izzy (izzy has two hands). another ship im entertaining the idea of is possibly duncan/dj? but neither of those two are going to have much relevance to the story. actually, funny story, this was supposed to be an alejandro/noah/heather fic, but i totally forgot to tag it as such. im debating on if i want to keep it that way afterall, or have it stay just alenoah.. i guess we'll see the further i write. there is some others but those are a bit spoilery so, stay tuned..!

uhh.. i feel like thats a very weird thing to ask? but, i guess you could say i was inspired after reading stakes? i began writing this last month (pictured below) so i wouldnt say i wrote and posted this just because stakes got deleted. actually, i wasnt going to post this fic at all until i had at least 5 chapters written for it, or all of it written, but i got too excited after finishing writing chapter 2 so.. teehee...

i THINK it is..!

teehee i cant saaay.. much. what i can say is it being 'non-typical' is important. its nothing like soul bounds themselves. how youd think of a soulmate 'au' is not what this is, nobody are soulmates. but .. well.. sooomething may happen. i will just say, it has something to do with vampire culture.

fun facts, huh..? mmm i really dont know.. tbh not even i think too deeply on this sort of thing.. i guess id say that noah has a lot of moles / freckles everywhere? so him having a bite mark wouldnt really raise suspicion, given that its just two puncture wounds. i dont know, im sorry! i guess ill have to think on this some more.. im sort of entertaining the idea that theres more to the universe than just vampires, if this helps. buut,.. i havent decided yet, teehee.

hmm, aside from me thinking itd be funny for him to have a mark on his leg? well... who knows!

anyway, thanks for caring so much to ask me stuff!

[whumpshaped]

How do you write gore? I am interested in this process.

alright okay so. this got long and i also mention some brief examples of gore in there. i hope its somewhat helpful?? or at all?? im not sure. im not great at giving advice im sorry

gore is something very precious and intimate to me. i feel like i approach it in a way people would approach a tender smut scene. because its the same to me. its being able to peel back someones little layers. to be inside them. to know them. to know them better than they know themselves, because honestly, when was the last time you took a peek at your own kidneys? yeah i thought so. gore too takes two or more people because whatever gore you can inflict on yourself is Nothing compared to the tender intimacy of someone else digging around in your stomach. its vulnerable. its beautiful.

as for literal descriptions, i always try to get very visceral with it, because i feel like it deserves detail and long drawn out paragraphs of description. there are so many sensations and sounds and sights and smells to describe. i cant write super detailed smut but i can write the exact way someone would reach inside someone else's ribcage and slide their fingers under the bone to caress their lungs. its just so much more comfortable to me. it feels like home.

i look at tons of images of specific elements of gore i want to write, real images, drawings, medical illustrations etc. when i can, i watch surgery videos on it. i want to know what it's like so i can write it as best as i can.

i like to relate it to my own life too. shout out to my 5th grade literature teacher who said "whenever i think about being burned at the stake, i like to imagine how much it hurts when i accidentally burn my hand on the clothing iron or stove. and thats just a moment, and a small surface." she was so real for that. breaking every bone in someones body? think back to that time u broke the tiniest bone in your wrist at age 11 and your entire arm went numb. putting needles in someones fingers? blood draws, or pricking yourself while sewing, but times ten or a hundred. and if you really cant relate it to yourself, read about it, read the symptoms, read the accunts of ppl who HAVE gone through it, try to really imagine it.

and dont forget about shock. shock is one of the best parts of gore to me. because you will probably go into shock when you see your severed arm (shout out to the medical instructor who taught us first aid on my drivers course).

idk. gore is something so precious and important to me. it just sucks me in, it feels like writing a long unhinged love letter as an obsessive lover. every time.

and that doesnt mean i condone gore or think its morally awesome to dismember someone. but you can write it that way from a whumper's perspective. but you can also write whumpers who dont really like it but have to do it for whatever reason. whumper pov is good if you dont want to try and explain how itd feel. some things i like to consider: is this the first time whumper does this? does it make them giddy with excitement? or is this the thousandth time and its just work to them? do they like what theyre doing? is it a means to an end or is it for fun? do they have any medical knowledge?

then of course you can write it from whumpee's perspective, which might be good for not going into anatomical detail. whumpee doesn't really see whats going on, most likely. and there's so much blood! it's their blood! theyre not thinking about anatomy, theyre thinking pain pain pain pain PAIN PAIN PAIN. some things i like to consider: has whumpee ever gone through something like this? is this the first time they're seriously hurt? is it the thousandth? and if it is the thousandth, how does it compare to the previous times? how is whumpee's pain tolerance? are they afraid of dying? do they have any medical knowledge, can they kinda gauge how bad the damage will be?

you can bring in a third observer, write it from their pov. itll be vastly different every time based on that character's own feelings towards gore, towards the two or more people involved, etc. there are so many ways to depict and explain what gore looks and feels like.

when i write gorey stuff, i like to just get it all out in a first draft, then go back and do some "realism checks" (this might not be smth you want at all and thats okay :) ). not medical accuracy or anything, but i like to go back and think okay, this character is getting their eyes plucked out, would they really be snarky during the process? maybe not! lets take that out. gore is smth that is usually rly far removed from your life/experiences, so it takes effort to write it in a way that feels authentic.

in any case, just have fun and remember fantasy gore hurts no one :)

[raspberry-vinaigrette]

for the ask game .. 🎥 💢

THANK YOU FOR THE ASK RAAH

🎥- oh my god i LOVE LOVE LOVE the dsaf3 good ending scene with jack confronting davetrap in the saferoom. i have brought up this scene to my sister + best friend like five separate times and analyzed it so agonizingly hard. ohhhh jack having all his internalized beliefs confirmed in that one moment? the fact davetrap is likely talking completely impulsively to get under jack's skin and hoping to make him cave and admit he still wants davetrap around (at least as i interpret the scene) but all it does is make jack believe he's irreversibly fucked up and the only way to save davetrap is to kill them both? the fucking "you can't move on." in pink text ??? it makes me lose my mind. and also i have a lot of thoughts on the switch from first-person reality segment style into the top-down pixelated style from a narrative perspective. i know it's probably just to make the cutscene run smoother, but there's just so much to pick apart in that one scene. i'm also a HUGE sucker for the dsaf2 good ending cutscene with jack doing the speech to the spirits of the dead children, it's just... so beautifully done. and the hug with dee at the end? blackjack's "i'm proud of us"? god. they're both EXCELLENT scenes that i have rewatched multiple times <3

💢 - i consider this mostly a consequence of the fact i'm pretty sure doggo considered every dsaf game to be the last but i feel like the flipside/happiest day stuff could've been conveyed better. how did the machines come to be? did henry make them or did he not get to before being dragged into the void, and if he didn't, do they come to be just by proxy of jack's promise, or... what? and how does jack rewire the happiest day arcade machine in DSAF3 to let him into the entire flipside? it's insinuated he has very little clue on what the flipside is or what he's doing, but then what was his plan there?? it's a bit confusing and you can kinda fill in blanks from context clues but it's ultimately a reader-interpretation thing. there's just a few too many loose ends compared to some interpretation stuff in dsaf though and i would've liked a little more to work with.

also there's the weird discrepancy of where in dsaf2 fredbear is like "hey the animatronics who are possessed shoved you in a suit, sorry" before having jack make the promise, but then in dsaf3 jack specifically says "henry killed me" (or well... doesn't say. it's one of the greyed-out options in dsaf3's legacy ending when jack says his real name)? ive seen some people take this to mean jack got springlocked in a suit twice but that just feels weird to me, and i think having jack springlocked by the animatronics possessed by children (who are presumably at least semi-conscious of their actions, given what we see of the possessed animatronics) kinda takes away some of the pathos of jack choosing to help these kids. and also its just never acknowledged by dee or any of the kid spirits outside of that one cutscene. so i think itd be easier (and more narratively sensical, since the rest of the dsaf3 rpg party died due to henry in some way) to just say henry triggered the suit on jack and work from there.

i may just be missing some textual stuff so if im missing smtn let me know! either way i dont count it as a writing flaw on doggo's part, the narrative and tone shifted greatly across the trilogy and things were bound to get a little mixed up LMAO

[spearxwind]

im probably gonna add a bunch of different factions to CD honestly. maybe even an empire or something?

more thots:

initially i wanted it to be a very nature/wilderness oriented world and i STILL want it to be that way so i can focus on exploration and such but at the end of the day any world with a society will make groups and will have ideals and i think itd be neat to have different factions with conflicting ideas pull at the strings of the story

currently the biggest (and pretty much only) faction is the hunters guild, which I took from monster hunter as inspo, where one organization is tasked with learning about and helping the ecosystem. I do rly like this idea and i wanna keep the whole 'respecting the environment' angle as opposed to having everything be a stripmine for resources like in other media, but after considering it for a while i think its naive to think something like that would be as global as i originally thought it would be

and it brought up a logistics problem with the message I wanted to convey, which is that if you dont respect the ocean you will Get Got. But the hunters (admittedly most of the ones getting killed in my lore) are probably THE most respectful ones so its kinda weird to have them be on the receiving end of violence always

Idk exactly how i want to move this idea, but there will def be like. different hunter guilds at least. the more respectful ones, and the for profit ones. and everyone shady who surrounds them

and the reason why i was considering an empire as well was because while im not interested in writing overarching plots about conquest and how territories evolve over time i do think its an interesting foil to have in an otherwise really nature oriented setting that also serves as the big bad guy everyone hates

and i think theyre narratively fun as well (where are they getting all the people and resources? wouldnt you like to know weatherboy)

[jennrypan]

mIraculous ladybug is the show where the writer doesn't know how to write teenager as teenager and what would you change on mlb if you have the power to do that

Ohhh boy. Welp- this will be LONG.

1: Id make it in 2D, cuz one..the expressions and behaviors do NOT translate well with this animation and also..I think itd be cooler.

2: Give Marinette new outfits!!! Shes an inspiring fashion designer cmon!! Have her make stuff for herself and friends (and get an actual person that knows about fashion to give pointers)

3: Let Marinette actually..do hobbies with her friends that isnt about Adrien or Ladybug like..show her have a life outside of just that?? Show the audience who she is so we can love her more (and itll add more angst to how much she has to set back for Ladybug)

4: Adrien shares that actual plot and we see more of his home life and how it differed from Marinettes (Like Marinettes life is full of life and colors and Adriens is dull with little to no emotions allowed)

5: Marinette would maybe still give Chloe the shit advice for her mom thinking shes helping but instead of it being seen as a good thing it shows that Marinette cant fix everything especially things like this cus she doesnt get it (and itll make her look at people and her life in a diff light cuz she realizes..she has loving parents and most people dont, which leads to her looking at Gabriel with a side eye even more and regretting what she told Chloe)

6: Use Lila more and hint at how collective she is, make her use better lies and show her actually doing stuff shes lied about and hanging out with the class so it actually makes sense why they truly dont see her as evil (i also..wouldnt make her some evil mastermind , shes just petty and annoying, desperately wanting to be cool and loved by her peers) whether she gets redeemed or not depends

7: Show Adrien and Nino hanging out!! Let him have friends outside of Marinette and Ladybug!!

8: Marinette wouldnt give literally everyone in her class a miraculous..its so lame. Instead like Master Fu..she gives it to people she sees doing good things but not before discussing it with Chat Noir (Alya, Nino and Chloe will still get it and eventually Chloe would suggest Sabrina with Adrien or Marinette suggesting Kagami etc)

9: Give Luka more..personality than musical simp. AND EYELASHES OR EYELINER CUZ FUCK HE LOOKS LIKE THIS 👁👄👁!!!

10: Dont reveal who Hawkmoth is until the middle of season three, like in season 1 its a complete mystery and his motives are unknown, show Gabriel actually doing his job (he goes out and wears actual nice clothes instead of just..white and red..) So no one even suspects hes the villain, hes just doing his job..he just looks too busy for Adrien

Basically..fix the animation, fix how the emotions are handled..give the characters more depths and interaction so we can care a lot more about their motivations ?

I just wanna see these guys do..actual hobbies instead of just going to school..playing video games and thats it?? None of the other kids seem to have..lives outside of each other

Also..give the girls better outfits :/ its all kinda lame ngl. So thats just the jist, I dont want this to be too long cuz I got a LOT id change for this show ngl

[confessions-official]

Tw ed and possible depression?

I feel sick when I think about if I'm depressed or not. I dont like using that word, I havent earned it. I have a loving family and the best girlfriend in the world. I dont wanna die, I just dont wanna exist. I dont wanna do anything except smoke weed, Which helps things not seem so dim. It makes me feel less. Bored I guess. I sont wanna do anything. I dont wanna game, I dont wanna talk to my family, I dont wanna talk to my friends, I dont wanna talk to my girlfriend, I dont wanna draw, I dont wanna do my work, I dont wanna get out of bed. But I do. I know people who are depressed who cant make themself gwt out of bed.

I feel like a faker. I cant tell anyone I feel this way because it'd be unnecessary burden to them, And their lives are already hard enough without me adding to it. I don't want to tell anyone the bad stuff because then they'd think the same way, But mt life isnt even that bad. Its hard to say or send anything because my body just. Doesnt let me. I'll be trying to post a silent cry for help and automatically exit out and cancel the post. I'll write it all up and instead of hitting send I delete it all.

I dont even eat half the time anymore. I wait until its unbearable and affecting me to eat. I used to tell my gf because when she tells me to eat I do, But I stopped. I dont wanna bother her. Nobody notices either, Since in our house we usually only eat dinner together, And that's if my dad doesnt have to work. He leaves at 3 o'clock every day so its not like he can see if I'm eating or not.

Im doing better in school now, I was trying but. Now I'm not. It doesnt matter though. I dont even remember what grade I'm in. Being homeschooled means I never have to see or speak to anyone. Its what I wanted anyways. Less work. Less hours. Less effort lower goals yet higher outcomes. I had 3 F's almost constantly in school, Now I only have one, And the rest are A's and B's.

Its easy when you can search anything and everything up. If I have an essay I read the wiki page for whatever its about and I've only gotten 100%'s in english so far. My overall grade is a 100% for english actually

I just dont understand. I dont hate myself do I? I thought i finally loved myself. I thought i finally fixed it i fixed myself i was finally better i was normal. Theres no reaskn i should be feeling so desprately lost and so alone nd so. Sad

I'm sorry. I know this isnt the blog for this, I know this is for confessions but this is the only place I can say any of this. I couldnt tell anyone in my life that I dont wanna exist, Or that I think my brain snapped, Or that I have serious problems. I hate this. I just want someone to know and care. I just want someone to notice something is wrong. Itd make it so much fucking easier if I coulrnt jide behind the lie of 'im okay'

 

[snickerdoodlles]

nimona fix-it that i'm not writing. may properly clean this up when i have more brain space

(tags originally from this post)

this has been sitting in my drafts for. months. as i tried to gather my thoughts beyond a big hearty Yeah.jpeg #honestly? what would've made the movie work a lot more for me? #is if during nimona's freak out over the kid being scared of her/calling herself a monster #ballister had turned to her and gone ''uh. aren't you?'' #because i think it wouldve helped them better tie several themes in the movie: first that nimona does not actually want to be destructive. #that's very much her lashing out in a ''you call me the monster? well ill BE your monster'' #but it comes from a place of emotional pain so directly facing with the consequences of it understandably sets her on a spiral #second is ballister's own spiral of going ''burn me? fine i burn YOU'' and parallel him hitting a similar spiral nimona had for contrast #third. i dont think ballister's prejudice should have been prompted externally. #the movie like. doesnt actually want to/doesnt trust itself to deal with its characters actually being prejudiced #which is why ballister's turning away from nimona had to be prompted by the director through his ex #to give him an easier rejection of it and reconciliation with nimona (to give ALL of them an easier rejection/reconciliation of their #prejudice with the exception of the director. who just dies.) #if ballister had called nimona a monster in that moment i think it wouldve helped illustrate a few things better: that societal prejudice is #ingrained deeper than most people realize. ballister would have fully accepted nimona as a monster but not recognized that he shouldnt be #thinking of her AS a monster in the first place. theres still something inside him that he needs to finish unpacking and heal. #i think it also would have shown better how people who are victims of prejudice can still perpetuate it. making it so that ballister had to #be externally manipulated to enact that against nimona undermines the message of harm by societal prejudice that the movie tried to send #also i just think switching up that betrayal wouldve made for a smoother sequence of events in movie. ballister calls out nimonas destruction #and reveals he still has ingrained prejudice. nimona runs and ballister can even still run into his ex again afterwards. and if they want #to keep nimona's backstory the ex revealing that to ballister could instead be how ballister realized how wrong he was in the first place #itd give context to realize the extent to which he hurt nimona with his thoughtlessness and work better to prompt him running out to #reconnect with her. and fix that 'change the narrative' line because as is its like???? kinda hanging in the breeze as is oof #ANWYAYS tl;dr--nimona falls apart for me because the movie wants to tackle heavy topics but doesnt want any of its characters to act out in #any truly problematic ways. so ALL the bad as to fall on one specific villain (whose so much of a prop she only gets a title and not a name) #that they can just kill at the end and absolve the entire town of their 'sin' (prejudice). its v much the christian theme of the#sacrificial goat+scapegoat actually. the director stops representing prejudice and is just there to give everything a clean resolution #it has a lot of the pieces but its too…timid to really dig into and address them. this prejudice isnt the only one but my tags are SO LONg #nimona

[your-local-uwu-artist]

okay so i got another video essay idea BUT I SWEAR T H I S TIME i think ill manage to complete the script (yes thats what i say everyt ime fnsdjkafl) anyway

if youd like to hear more its under the cut (kirby related btw uwu)

warning its all very ramble-y

setting the bar low and keeping the tone more so to just discussing something i like so i dont get to ambitious with the analysis

so a while back i read this awesome poggers fanfic called "being a knight is easy (and so is pretending to be one) by @/azzie-tangerine

its REALLY GOOD

and ive already had plans for a potential series discussing completed novel length fanfics so it could be snazzy!!

most notably though sense its written work thatll help me to not go crazy ambitous with the anaylsis: i ussually just have SO many thoughts that its hard to write down, so im hoping that covering a written work instead of something with a visual element, will help my thoughts to be more manageable sense like, i dont have as many of those entire essays over itty bitty details stuck in my head sense i dont have as much of a grasp on the itty bitty details of the written word

like bassically, because im less savy with written work my brain wont go so absolutely primal artist instinct mode feral lmaofnsdjkalfhdsk

anyway, ill want to go over all the art and fanart the author has done and recieved and maaaaybe if i gain the confidence see if i could talk to/interview the author?? (i had the confidence to compliment them on anon but that was it nfdskja )

gsoh this post is so un structured

uuhhhh heres a link to the fic

Being a Knight is Easy! (So is Pretending to Be One) - Chapter 1 - Azzie_Tangerine - Kirby (Video Games) [Archive of Our Own]

if you read it: it would be super helpful to me if you could maybe lmk your thoughts and takeaways on it? or wanna talk about it with me more

its nice to have other peoples thoughts to bounce off of when writing a review/video essay/anaylsysis/random guy on the internet goes feral over kirby characters having emotions video

so anywayyy snfskjdfk ummm if anybody would have any video edting software recs that would be GREAT too~ (as well as its nice to know who would be willing to proof read my scripts)

okie so

currently i guess my "to do list" for starting up this idea is to reread the fic wile writing notes along the way: and joting down comments and quotes

during that ill also work on organzing my thoughts into topics/categories

i dont want to worry to much about structure, art, and the such until i have more work to show

anyhow! while im chaotically chatting i might as well kirby animation update too!!!

im having a hard time deciding where to start with the lines: at first i was gonna do a non anti-aliasing basic brush so itd be easy to color but i really wanted a bit more texture so im currently trying to get all the backgrounds lineart with that: in which ill than go along with the character animation and color whenever its most convenient too~

and sense i can heres another wip!

a bit of a pause on this piece: ima try to find some lineless scenery speedpaints to give me more of an idea of how to go about with this