#i think it's time i got back into reading fanfic

[stardelabourgeoisie]

the dream SMP will always be a part of me but DAYUM I'm glad its over. for many reasons. mainly the creators.

I think I miss it sometimes. The quiet death of that world was the most devastating things to witness, especially as I joined the fandom in 2021, which was about halfway through the peak of it. I was a sucker for benchtrio. I loved revivebur's plotline and dream going insane in prison. Those 2 both had an ending. Karlnapity was the ship that made me sign up to ao3. I stayed up until 3 am to catch the last time travel story Karl made, and it ended on a cliffhanger that never got resolved.

I don't miss my ignorance of who the people who made these stories were, (Fuck most of them are shitty people and we just didn't know) I grieve the quiet death of the server, and with it all of these stories that meant so much to us. I recently started reading Karlnapity fanfic again. I reread crimson rogue. I look back on my subscription list on ao3 and I stop when I see the stories abandoned because of the author's grief over Technoblade's passing. I grieve what could have been, what should have been. And now, years later, I let myself grieve over the thing that got me through the worst years of my life. The thing that let me meet a friend I still talk to to this day.

The fact it's a Minecraft server is irrelevant. It mattered. It mattered to me. I will continue to interact with the fandom, even if it is not to the same level as before, and I will grieve its unfair silent death.

DON’T STOP THE PARTYYYY

[lixiesfreckless]

Let Him Cook | h. j.

➸ synopsis: Your husband is making dinner— or at least, he would be if you weren’t distracting him…

➸ starring: hong joshua x reader

➸ word count: ~900 words

➸ general content: husband!joshua, kissing, need I say more you’re gonna read the fic anyway

➸ rating: TV-14

➸ author’s note: co-written by @ashonheavenscloud in a game of frantic fanfic on the TRAIN??? if you’ve read my fic Sugar Across The Hall, this reads as a pseudo-bonus scene.

♫ this fic has a soundtrack! too good by christian kuria works pretty well hehehe

"Baby, you should take a picture," Joshua chuckles, dicing the tomato on the cutting board with ease, "it'll last longer."

"But my phone is so far away," you whine playfully, stretching your arms on the raised counter akin to a cat as you watch your husband work, not offering much more than the occasional flirty quip and lopsided smile.

Joshua clicks his tongue with a playful smile. “Guess you’re out of luck, then.” He quickly finishes the tomatoes, moving onto the head of lettuce and expertly cutting the leaves into shredded pieces. You dramatically fall limp, making Joshua chuckle.

“Really, I’m sure there’s nothing special about me cutting ingredients for tacos.”

“Not my fault you look so sexy doing it.”

Joshua laughs softly, a light blush rising on his cheeks as he slides the shredded leaves into a bowl and sets the knife down, leaning over the counter and gazing at you.

"Is that why you've been watching me?" He asks coyly, rolling up his sleeves to his forearms again as they had slipped down. "And here I thought you were attempting to learn something-”

"Oh, but I did," you respond, sliding a little closer to him, watching his amused gaze slide across your face. “Mostly that you’re a very talented chef. And I should buy you an apron and one of those white hats-”

“I think you’re just trying to butter me up so I cook for you more often.”

You gasp in fake astonishment. “That’s cruel, Josh.” You slide closer, close enough that he has to look down at you to see the mischief in your irises. He freezes for a second, looking to the ceiling, perhaps to find his restraint.

"What's cruel," he says suddenly, seizing you by the thighs and heaving you up onto the counter with ease, "is you looking as good as you are knowing if I don't finish cooking, neither of us will eat tonight."

"Oh but I can think of one thing I could eat right now," you giggle, reaching for the back of his neck as he leans into you instinctively.

You can hear him slide the cutting board slightly out of his way as he settles between your open thighs, not wasting a second to lean close and steal a lingering kiss. You both sigh into it, and Joshua’s smile widens as he runs his hands up your thighs and leans forward again, met halfway by your eagerness.

“So this is what you were after the whole time, huh?” Joshua mumbles against your lips, hands moving to slip around your waist, hooking his fingers through the loops of your jeans. “So much for loving my cooking.”

“Not my fault you’re so distracting,” you grin, earning another sigh, equal parts exasperated and adoring.

“Yeah, yeah, c’mere,” he pulls you closer, kisses you deeper, tugging at your bottom lip in a way that elicits a swarm of butterflies to take part in wild flight. His nose nudges yours, and you take the opportunity to pull away and look up at him, hands braced at the edge of the counter as you teasingly tilt your head to the side.

"Do you have any post-dinner plans, Mr. Hong?"

"Oh I do," he says, his voice an octave lower as he leans back in, "I'm going to be very busy."

He plants a long, deep kiss on your lips and travels west, trailing down your cheek. "I'm afraid there's a woman," he pauses to place another kiss, "and I just can’t seem to stop thinking about her.” His lips find your jawline, your ear. “She’s got this…hold on me. Her smile, her laugh, her…” his lips drift down your neck, hands moving to firmly grasp your waist as he pauses, nose brushing your throat. “Her…”

His voice fades away, mouth finding the base of your neck and sucking slowly, forcing you to bite your bottom lip against a whine. Joshua leans back after a minute, leaving the new mark tingling as he meets your eyes with a gentle smile that juxtaposes the way his eyes roaming your body, the way he grabs your chin and guides your lips back to his.

“She sounds like quite the woman,” you say through unsteady breaths, muffled before you can say much more by Joshua’s mouth capturing yours, pressing his body into you, cutting you off with a gasp. It takes a minute for you to get another chance at speaking, and hardly that, as your breathing comes in shaky when he pulls back again, eyes still closed, lingering within a breath from your lips. “She’s lucky to have someone as kind and sweet and-”

“Good at cooking?” Joshua suggests, making you giggle as he kisses your cheek again, once more trailing to the side as you nod slowly.

“The best.” Your hands weave through his hair at the back of his head, forcing him to look back at you with dazed eyes and a smile.

“She deserves it,” Joshua whispers, reaching to tuck a piece of hair behind your ear. His mouth lifts further into a teasing grin. “She might even convince me to skip right past dinner.”

‧⋆ ✧˚₊‧⋆. ✧˚₊‧⋆‧

[facewithoutheart]

Five plus One, fic recs

A post is going around about fics you consider classics in the Snowbaz fandom. I’d like to take it a step further by asking …

What are five fics you consider your inspiration/influences for writing, plus one of your fics which you think best represents what you want to bring to the fandom?

5. Hang the Moon by @captain-aralias

@captain-aralias is, to me, the snowbaz fandom fic writer of our time. Her commitment to detail, to nailing Rainbow’s voice, while infusing every fic with a heart and purpose that will leave you changed. Every fic of hers is chef’s-kiss-perfection but I’m highlighting Hang the Moon specifically as a fic I often think about (Baz, wet tennis clothes, helping Simon fight the merwolves), and a fic that was my introduction to what fanfics could be/do. I think I finished this fic and just stared at the wall for an hour because I was just like, oh. Oh.

4. The Pitch by basic-bathsheba

Local Hero is one of my favorite fanfics but I wanted to highlight this fic because it’s just such a powerful and understated story. It’s love in the details. This Simon is the model for all of my Simon’s, just a complete simp for Baz haha but also a man who is comfortable and confident being the man who loves Baz even if he doesn’t get to claim it publicly.

3. Stay Up With Me by @sharkmartini

Not sure what to say about this that hasn’t been said a million times. It’ll break your heart; it’ll put you back together. The concept is brilliant and the exploration of two Simon’s will definitely put your emotions through a wringer. Time travel/what-if fics will always grab my attention but this one in particular makes the same case Rainbow posed in Carry On: what if the villain isn’t the villain? And takes it a step further, because Simon realizes he could be the villain, too. Absolutely beautiful.

2. Can’t Find My Way Home by @carryonsimoncarryonbaz

This is one of those fics that just has so much heart and sweetness. I love a good second chance AU, and this one has such Hallmark vibes in the best way. I just love the slow burn of it, and the amazing ending. A perfect holiday fic to snuggle up with. Reading this feels like being cozy up by the fire with someone you love. Actually writing this makes me wanna reread this so much; now that I live with actual Fall I wanna feel cozy like this again.

1. Basil Pitch’s Diary by @bookish-bogwitch

I know it’s a bit weird to rec a WIP as an influence, especially one that’s being written as we speak, but working with/beta-ing Em’s works have made me a sharper, smarter writer. I know this fic is a classic in the works and it’s something I think about on a weekly basis. The Baz Em gives us, to me, feels like canon Baz taken to the next level. What if Baz was the villain … but only to himself? Em’s writing really is just economical in the best way; every line hits, every paragraph teaches me something. And then the heart. It’s genuinely so hard to do what she does and I’m so lucky to get to see her work in realtime.

+1 This Will All Go Down In Flames

I think, at the end of my fandom career, I want this to be the snowbaz fic people associate with me (Spadey being a close second hahaha). But I do feel like it’s got a lot of fandom in-jokes, humor, and sweetness, plus the fun high-stakes of them being in the spotlight. I got to celebrate the Austin I love and miss, as well as poke fun at my own hipster upbringing. I put a lot of Me™ in this fic and it always feels so lovely when people like it. Besides, I got to work with the amazing @tea-brigade and their art just takes this fic to the next level. A dream collab.

(Throwing in the caveat that I started reading long before I got an ao3 account so it’s very likely I’ve missed some amazing fics from before 2021; I’m so sorry!)

Tagging everyone listed above and six more peeps to start: @cutestkilla, @you-remind-me-of-the-babe, @larkral, @ileadacharmedlife, @thewholelemon & @aristocratic-otter

[schizosamwincester]

So, November 5, in addition to being a) my birthday, b) Destiel day, c) @buncoreclown 's birthday, d) election day in America, and e) guy fawkes day, is also the fifth anniversary of my psychotic break. And just. Goddamn. Half a fucking decade.

For me, a delusion onset very, very suddenly. There were a few passing thoughts of it in the days before, but it pretty much hit all at once at about 5:35. The delusion came on really strong with instant, intense tactile hallucinations, and I started dissociating and never completeness stopped until I started T not even a month ago.

Schizophrenia is neurodevelopmental, so in a lot of ways I've been schizophrenic my whole life. I very much have always had the schizophrenic thought patterns. My brain has always grabbed onto ideas too hard, my thoughts have always been scattered, I've always been rambly, I've always been obsessive. That said, there's a huge difference between that latent schizophrenia and me being actively schizophrenic. All of those symptoms got worse in the after. And tomorrow marks 5 years of living as an honest-to-god schizophrenic.

Despite how much worse my symptoms are now than they were before, it's so much better to be living in the after because now I understand that none of it is normal and can deal with it and be gentle to myself about it. I'm not just incapable of getting my shit together—I deal with an actual thing called disorganized thinking that makes it incredibly difficult to keep a train of thought a lot of the time. I'm not just stubborn—I have actual delusions, so it is really hard to let go of ideas. And I don't just "babble," as my mother would say—rambling and tangents are how my brain works and I shouldn't have to stop that just because it isn't normal. Lots of people love hearing my long-ass rants.

But that's not really what I'm thinking about today. I'm just thinking about how despite the fact that November 5, 2019 still defines me and every facet of my current life was caused by what happened that day, it is now 5 years later. I've spent 5 years in the after. I've spent more time being "recovered" than I ever did in active psychosis. And it is just strange that something that happened a half-decade ago when I was still in high school is still so definitive. I have been living on my own for a year. I've been working as a CNA for 2 and a half years. My life is nothing like it was when I was a high schooler in my parents house (well, except for the fact that I still write and read too much fanfic), but I do still think about that event not necessarily daily, but at least weekly.

Five years is a long time, and I'm very glad to be alive and, despite everything, coping with it all extraordinarily well. Don't get me wrong. I'm still definitely disabled. I've got my life set up very carefully to work around my limitations, and I'm also just really lucky to have found about the one affordable apartment in walking distance from everything important in all of America (schizophrenia is why I don't drive). But still, like... I've made it to 5 fucking years out. Just being alive and functional by then was almost incomprehensible to me by like, November 8, 2019.

Five goddamn years. Given how hard it is and how much I just take everything one day and one week at a time, it is so weird to step back and realize I've been living with schizophrenia for that long.

Okay. That's all. Back to my regularly scheduled fandom bullshit.

[shiveringspy]

Seth & Kate | We'll hide in sin

[melooooo17]

@openphrase123 your fanfic(s but i mainly made art of the mira and siffrin one because i cant remember words for the life of me for i do not speak french) IS???? ? SO GOOD. SO GOOD IM FOAMING AT THE MOUTH finally something to look forward to in the week fr

Mild spoilers for it ig!! But nothing too explicitly groundbreaking i dont think it'll kill your mom to look at these without having read the ff first

Don't mind the shit quality i??? I drew all these so fast theyre kinda shit and i have yet to fully acclamate isat to my artstyle so it's mid

Teehee me when i make shitty rushed fanart to show my appreciation that i cannot put into words for my faovorite games and also authors

peep the rant in the tags

[seriouslagamorph]

can the funnybunny enjoyers of the tadc fandom and the funnybunny enjoyers specifically stop making jax and pomni so painfully heterosexual for five seconds. looking at you ao3.

[dawdlecentric]

Yeag...

[melancholic-pigeon]

Okay this is the *actual* last comment, for real, but I just found out Spider is now smearing me as a convert and accusing me of being involved with drama I was not involved with because he mistakenly attributed my apologies for his public temper tantrum as being about something unrelated.

THIS IS A FALSE ACCUSATION and I do not appreciate having yet another bit of fake malicious intent falsely ascribed to my actions and* attributing a completely unrelated attack to me.

Also, it's very sad and disappointing whenever a Jew gets mad at a convert because something else is going on in the Jew's life and the convert happens to be in the splash zone and the Jew falls over backwards to smear the convert and invalidate her faith.

Just....the childish aggression is making me so, so sad and disappointed, from someone I used to think very highly of, who is now lying about me and publicly smearing me with false accusations based on a conflict he started because he misinterpreted something I said and I went out of my way to give him the benefit of the doubt when trying to clear up the mistake HE MADE that led him to decide bullying and attacking me for three fucking days was appropriate and okay and that I'm the bad guy for saying it's wildly unprofessional to behave like this in public to a former customer face.

Sorry, but facts, reality, linear time and the truth of what I actually said and did are on my side here, and I will not stand for being smeared and attacked and shat all over because I had the gall to try to kindly resolve his uncalled for, unjustified temper tantrum.

I am also not sorry that I left a side note in the tags that it was also unacceptable for HIM to drag his daughter into a stupid internet slapfight based on his own reading comprehension failure. Because it was and is unacceptable, and she needs to hear that message from someone.

End of story. Keep digging that hole as long as you like, Spider. It's not helping your case and is continuing to make you look progressively worse and more unreasonable, and the only person you have to blame is yourself.

*revised for clarity

[woafofbread]

It’s crazy that I remember yj Wally’s death day every but I still do. I never watched season 4 because I wanted him to be brought back but now the show is pretty much canceled again lmao.

[holocene-sims]

for better or for worse, i've been bitten by the fallout 76 bug 🫡

[cxsmiicc]

honestly unsure how this happened but i feel like it sums up my mental state pretty well

[sneaky-story]

erased the flash cw so hard from my memory I had myself convinced young justice is what got me into DC. god

[9hikers]

spent the last few weeks trying to figure out why the episodes after 12's run don't hit as hard and i cannot make a coherent argument for the life of me

[moinsbienquekaworu]

The true pain of reading a good AU is you want more of these specific guys but that characterisation only exists in the one specific fic/series

[wilde-shit-posting]

If we discussed Oscar Wilde like The Beatles fandom discusses mclennon we'd be in other places

That being said you should go follow my Beatles blog @maccas-glass-cornflake