#i think it might be a bit easier to just mark where they go on the base

[nattikay]

ear

The ears are definitely the part of the head that I've been dreading the most, because I've always struggled to make them work. I was never 100% satisfied with the ear results on past heads, so this time I'm trying a different method. It's based on TinnatuPaws's ear patterns, not actually printing and using any of them directly because I wanted that front border to have a slightly different shape, but taking the general method/idea. Took a couple hours to put together a working pattern because I only had a vague idea of what I was doing, and I guess the final look is pretty similar to TinnatuPaws's canine ear design anyways so perhaps it would've been easier to just use that one directly but w/e too late now. I think it turned out pretty alright, but of course the real test will come once I actually put fur on it.

These ears also probably look a tad on the large side for a standard housecat--that was intentional; I'm a bit worried about this head base being a bit too small compared to the other parts of the suit so I'm gonna try compensating by exaggerating the ears, head floof, and cheek floofs a bit. This base already has proportionally very large eyes so I think I can get away with it. Fingers crossed!

I did try on my previous head with the new body the other day to get a better idea of the size ratio and it looked alright, though while the base for my previous head is similar in size to this new one, I do think it might be sliiiiiightly larger overall, even accounting for the fact that it has fur and this one doesn't yet. Hopefully the difference won't be all that significant and I won't be walking around with a comically tiny head, but as with the ear method, the real test won't be till I actually fur it. So....we shall see.

[chobunz]

── anywhere but home. ( lhs ) ּ 𓂅 ⋆ 💋

summary; “i can give you all the exact same things he can, but a million times better,” or where a hot stranger makes it his promise to be the better choice than the man you came with.

ഒ pair: lee heeseung ㅊ f!reader

ഒ genre: pwp, smut, light angst, strangers to (??)

ഒ wc: 3.5k

ഒ warnings: drinking/scenes involving alcohol, minor jealousy, one night stand/hook up, d/s dynamics, spanking, marking, fingering, oral (f. rec), multiple orgasms, piv, unprotected s.x, sorta cute n fluffy ending hehe ˙✧˖

[ song inspo: anywhere but home by seulgi ]

a/n. i’ve had this in my drafts for quite some time but finally got around to finishing it.. i remember an anon requesting smth like a hook up fic w heeseung but i deleted the ask ;-; anywho, have this in the meantime while i’m still working on my other long fic 🤗🤗

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

per usual, it was another hectic weekend filled with back to back partying and going out. yeonjun (your new boytoy for now) had invited you out tonight so you pull up to the function wearing your sexiest little black dress, making all the heads turn soon as you walk in the club. even all of yeonjun’s friends couldn’t keep their eyes off you, and they were all pretty hot too which didn’t make the situation any easier. it was your first time meeting all of them properly, you only really spoke to them through quick interactions between you coming and going out of yeonjun’s room. they all knew you had a thing going on so they did their best to try and respect that.

“hey, you must be y/n right ? i’m kai, i don’t think we ever formally introduced ourselves so it’s nice finally talking to you !” a blonde man comes up to you, reaching his hand out for you to take.

you gave a soft smile as you shook his hand, “yes, it’s nice meeting you too !” all of the guys seemed really friendly, especially soobin, he can get pretty handsy when there’s a bit of alcohol in his system.

“ohh, so this is the girl we’ve been hearing all about ?” soobin stumbles his way over to you, already feeling tipsy off a couple shots. “nice to meet ya, i’m soobin,” you try and go for a handshake like you did previously with kai but apparently that wasn’t his style.

“c’mon don’t be shy, a hug isn’t gonna kill you !” he pulls you into a giant bear hug, almost embracing you like a longtime friend he’s known for years.

you shot him a questionable look, wondering what kinds of things yeonjun could possibly be saying about you to his friends.. hopefully it was nothing too detailed or invasive, in which that case you’d be pretty heated if he spilled all the tea about your sex lives.

“care to elaborate on what you heard about me..?” you ask skeptically, wondering if it’s something actually worth your time.

“i mean… nah, i probably shouldn’t— i can’t disclose top secret info like that !” he recants, not wanting to be the main source of why you might get angry with yeonjun later on.

sigh, as much as you wanted to keep prying him with more questions your vision gets blocked by yeonjun who quite literally comes out of nowhere with another shot.

“bin.. i think that’s enough chitchatting for now, just keep drinking and dancing !” he proceeds to hand soobin the tiny glass filled with mystery liquid, soobin gulped it down instantly and even asked for another.

this was definitely gonna be a night full of catastrophic fun. well hopefully. you didn’t drink much so it felt nice being one of the only semi-sober people of the bunch, the club was pretty packed but you were on the upstairs level and near the outdoor patio which had a gorgeous view of the skyline. the DJ tonight was pretty decent too, he played most songs you knew and liked which was rare nowadays. you didn’t need lots of alcohol to let loose and have fun so you make your way to the dance floor with yeonjun but not even 5 mins later he runs into a familiar face.

“yeonjun— is that really you ?!” a brunette woman comes up to him with the cheesiest smile on her face. “no way, chaewon ? long time no see !” he hugs her but that hug seems to be lasting way longer than it should..

it’s almost as if you completely didn’t exist anymore to him. he told you he’d be “right back” but it’s been a good 15-20 minutes and he’s still over at the bar with chaewon. he could’ve at least tried to hide the fact that he was flirtatious but he wasn’t even subtle when his eyes were glued to her massive rack the whole time she spoke. you know you aren’t dating this man but the disrespect of him to do that so blatantly in front of your face was crazy to you.

he’s crossed the big no-no line for you and it’s only fair you give him a taste of his own medicine. you scan the room to look for a hot guy that would make the perfect candidate, settling your eyes on a very, ridiculously handsome man standing a few meters away from you. he seemed to be alone, his facial expression looking almost bored. you never thought white pants looked good on anyone, but on him ? he was exquisite. he gave off 90’s skater vibes and looks like type that listens to cigarettes after sex. it intrigued you why such a good looking guy was here out by himself, just didn’t seem right.

you confidently walk up to him, acting as if you owned the place, tapping his shoulder to strike up a conversation. the blaring music would drown out your soft voice easily so you get closer to his ear, “hey, i’m just gonna put it out there right now, i think you’re hot and wanna dance with you !” you were feeling bold for sure tonight.

the man looks caught by surprise but doesn’t seem opposed by your advance. he whispers back in your ear, “the feelings mutual, i’d love to,” within seconds, an array of ring clad fingers wrap around your waist to bring you to the center of the dance floor.

you knew you had the full package but weren’t expecting to get this far so quickly, your backside was facing his front, swaying your hips to the beat of the music.

a slow r&b song comes on so he rests his chin on your shoulder, “you look amazing in this dress might i add..” the unnamed man says in a raspy tone, “this definitely feels like fate ‘cause i’ve been eyeing you since i came in here,” you met this guy not even half an hour ago and you’re already ready to drop to your knees for him.

“i didn’t try anything since i saw you with a guy earlier, that wasn’t your boyfriend right ?” you laugh, scoffing at the idea of you ever dating yeonjun. you’ll probably never want to see him again after this stunt he pulled.

“no, not at all ! he’s just some guy i was seeing, but he’s old news now !” you reassure him.

“ah, i see. so then i’m allowed to claim you for the rest of the night ?” he asks, curiosity lacing his words, almost melting right there when his breath fanned against the warmth of your skin.

“i’m all yours for the taking.”

the dance floor became a fuzzy obscure entity around you as your bodies collided. the way he danced so gracefully yet so sensual, his hands traveled down your body, admiring your curvy figure. it felt like a steamy movie scene where two hot strangers try and solve the thick tension between them. but your moment would soon be ruined by the constant vibrating of your phone. you tried ignoring it but it wouldn’t stop so you take it out your crossbody purse and look to see who’s been blowing it up. of course, the person who’s been trying to contact you was none other than yeonjun.

“sorry, s’cuse me i gotta look at this for a sec !” you break away momentarily to check the texts.

5 new notifications from- yeonjun (sneaky link 💦)

[1:00 am]: wow..

[1:03 am]: i leave and come back for only a couple mins just to see you with other guys ?? you really are shameless lmao

[1:04 am]: can’t believe you’d do me like that fr

[1:10 am]: funny cause i was starting to have genuine feelings for you too but i guess you girls are all just the same so idc it’s your loss 🤷🏻‍♂️

[1:18 am]: wtv

the audacity of this man was astounding. you cannot believe him of all people is actually getting mad at you for doing this. you know you’ll probably regret this tomorrow but you tell him off, it’s only right since he wants to pull the victim card now.

[1:25 am]: don’t make me laugh jun, you’re so self entitled that you can’t even see what YOU did wrong. i’m not gonna sit up here and explain myself so irdgaf what you think of me after this, i’m thru with your sorry ass anyways. go have fun with your new bae chaewon since you wanna mooch it up with her all night which was way more than “a couple mins” btw… you practically threw yourself at her like the manwhore you are and left me to fend for myself ! the only one who’s shameless here is you. kindly go fuck yourself and have a nice day :)

it felt good to let it all out after sending that, you gave zero fucks at this point. you put your phone on do not disturb, put it back in your purse and bring your attention back to the man with groovy dance moves.

“why don’t we get out of here ?” your ask sounds more like a demand as you pull his arm away to leave the floor, making your way through the sea of people.

you reach outside and you were finally able to talk normally, not having to scream over the music in order to understand each other. “my cars parked in that lot over there, we can go back to my place if you want.” he proposes, waiting for you to give him the approval.

usually you aren’t this lenient with just hooking with someone from the club but this guy was on another level, you had to see what he’s all about.

“sure, but before i get into the car with a complete stranger, can we at least know our names? i’m y/n.” you finally introduce yourself properly.

“yeah that would make sense, my name’s heeseung. it’s an honor to have you accompany me tonight,” he brings your hand up to his lips, pressing a delicate kiss to it. even the most minimal touch leaves you starstruck by him.

๑ ๑ ๑

once you got to heeseung’s place, it started off with some wholesome fun. just talking and getting to know more about each other, heeseung asked about yeonjun again to make sure you were okay but you shrug it off saying you were fine.

“trust me heeseung, i’m not shedding a single tear over him so no need to keep asking. i’ll be fine, he was just someone i used as a booty call to be honest..” you spoke nonchalantly, not wanting him to be the topic of discussion anymore.

he hums at your response, “good, now i won’t feel like an asshole for saying what i was thinking.”

“what were you thinking?” you wonder, raising your brow.

“that i can give you all the exact same things he can, but a million times better,” his voice was laced with seduction as he spoke, “i don’t even mean to sound cocky but i’ll make it my personal goal to be the most memorable fuck you’ve ever had,” he presses his chest up against yours.

“i’ll make sure you’ll never think about another man but me after i’m through with you princess.”

you nervously gulp, feeling yourself grow wetter by the minute. you’ve never had a man talk to you in such a way that could make you this easily aroused.

“that’s a pretty bold claim you said there, you think you can live up to it ?” you tease, hoping he won’t take it too seriously.

“oh i don’t think, i know. it’s 100% satisfaction guaranteed or your money back love— which will never happen.” he chuckles, snaking his hand to cup your chin and bringing it close to his lips. he stayed like that for what seemed like forever, staring at your petal lips, lightly squishing your cheeks together to turn them into a pout.

“so pretty…” he coos, inching closer to your lips now. he presents you with a deep kiss, sensing the raw passion through him as his other hand teased the inners of your thighs.

you get a fistful of his messy hair while sinking further down into the memory foam mattress, bringing him with you. he nibbles at your lower lip for entry and you immediately let him slide his tongue in, deliciously exploring each other, making you mewl as he tastes the sweetness of you. you softly moan into the kiss, grinding your hips below him, bucking up pathetically to feel some action down there.

“god you’re so fuckin’ hot,” he groans, after breaking away from the kiss. “i’m gonna fuck you ‘til it’s morning baby,” that sounded more like a threat than a promise.

“you gonna rail me so hard that i scream and call you daddy all night ?” you playfully remark, something ignited in him once you called him that, the desire for you only becoming more irrational.

“oh my beloved, you have no idea..” his breaths were heavy against your skin, pressing kisses to your jawline then trailing down to your neck to gently suck.

he found a hypersensitive area to make you gasp, sending goosebumps all over your body. you feel a hand on your breast, cupping it tenderly whilst littering your neck with pretty purple and red hickies. your legs squirm underneath from him rubbing your nipple through your dress, feeling it stiffen as he pinched and flicked at them. you were so horny for him at this point, your panties were a soaked up mess. you continued bucking into him for any bit of stimulation, whining to feel something. it’s been a while since you’ve been needy like this for a man…

“if you want something darlin’ just ask.” he props his head up to give you a shit eating smirk, wanting to hear you talk just as dirty as he was.

“gimme cock, please ! ’m so wet right now.. can’t take it anymore.. just need you to fill me up,” you weakly surrender. drool peaked out from the corner of your mouth and heeseung noticed so he licks it up, “that’s what i’ve been planning to do for hours, sweetheart.”

heeseung gives you a couple more small, fleeting kisses while lifting your dress up, caressing your plump thighs, running his index finger from your inner thigh to your damp clothed clit.

“goddamn you weren’t lying, you’re crazy wet.” you felt your cheeks burn at how embarrassingly wet he’s made you for someone you haven’t even known a full 24 hours yet.

“i’m just gonna prep you bit with my fingers m’kay babe ?” he pushes your panties to the side, sliding his digits along your folds to gather your slick. he entered two fingers in you while circling and stimulating your clit with his thumb, your moans echoed throughout the room just for him. he curls them inside you and your walls cinch around needily, arching your back and moaning with pleasure.

you were seemingly going to come undone just from heeseung fingering you, all the wetness dripping onto his wrist only making him want you to cream on his fingers more. your legs feel unstable and you twitch as you feel yourself cumming for the first time of the night, your arousal pours out into his digits, coating them with the creamiest mess. your mouth is locked open as you reach your high, another harsh swipe to your clit was the last string that pulled you.

feeling breathless at this point, he gave a twisted smile before taking his fingers out and placing them in your mouth to suck one by one, tasting your lovely essence. he rushed to take off his clothes; quickly removing his pants and boxers to reveal his freshly trimmed, hardened cock. your eyes widen at his length, he’s much bigger than you thought, you were figuring out how he’d be able to fit it all inside. he’ll make it fit one way or another.

there will be many more orgasms to come as the night progresses, you’ve lost count at this point as the duvet is now soaked with your juices. he was pounding you into the ground with his cock, producing hefty back shots to your ass while his hands rest on both sides of your waist. he hasn’t gotten tired of fucking your tight pussy since he’s started. his cock hitting that certain spot just right, making you go crazy for him, and not wanting to lose the angle you kept fucking yourself back on him just greedily chasing after the pleasure.

“who’s pussy does this belong to ?” he pants, hitting your walls precisely, “it’s all mine right ? my cock’s better than yeonjun’s right ??” he growls, already showing his possessive side within just a few hours. a loud slap to your ass comes with full force, barely giving you any time to react.

“r-right!! all yours, this pussy belongs to only you hee !” you internally struggled to speak, feeling faint off of how many times he’s made you cum. you scream and yelp from pleasure that his dick is the best and how good he’s making you feel. he’s fucked your overstimulated cunt so many times but you still subconsciously tighten around him as he draws out and pumps back in. as soon as he’s close to cumming he finishes on your back, spreading his white seed onto you like the filthy cockwhore you were for him.

he had you like putty in his hands, arching into his touch as he digs his nails into your plush hips. you squirt like it was nothing with him, but with yeonjun you could never do that. you couldn’t let this just be a one night stand, you have to get this guy’s number before you leave to do the walk of shame in the morning. speaking of morning; you can see a faint sliver of light through the curtains and you realize now that heeseung kept his word from earlier.

you never kept track of time though, only thing on your mind is heeseung’s cock filling you up repeatedly. his pace would get sloppier as he’s close to his ten thousandth orgasm, hearing a loud guttural groan escape his mouth. he pulls out again but this time he turns you over while manhandling you, pinning your arms to each side while spurts of more cum drips on your folds, watching it slowly leak down your swollen pussy. he drags his fingers to your cunt to spread your lips open, biting his lip at the sight— he made such a beautiful mess.

with your clit already being overstimulated and sensitive, he dove back in nose first and flicks his tongue back to it while tightly holding onto your thigh. your whole body trembles as you cry out to him, pulling his hair as he brings you to tears. you don’t know how you’re still breathing right now, waves of ecstasy washing your brain from constant stimulus, you were in utopia and heaven combined.

you weren’t sure how much more you’ll be able to endure, “heeseung ! heeseung !” you’d scream at the top of your lungs, body growing weaker and weaker. he was tearing down every part of you like his life depends on it. he forms saliva with his mouth and spits on your already dripping, throbbing cunt; he’ll never get tired of doing this.

“yeah ? gonna come again for me mama ?” he coaxes, already knowing the answer to that from the way you’re spasming under him.

“mhm..” you whine, feeling dizzy, too fucked out to speak.

“i make you feel the best don’t i ?” he grunts, slapping your pussy “no one makes you feel as good as i do, right babygirl ?”

“yes…” you whimper from the twinge of pain. eyes roll to the back of your head, that devilish gaze he had could snatch your soul in an instant.

he was completely right when he said no one’s ever made you feel this good, he was most definitely going to be the most memorable lay you’ve had in your life. yeonjun didn’t even come close to heeseung. you feel crazy for wanting to stay with him and ask him how he likes his eggs in the morning, his cock rewired your whole brain to think only of him, to be of service to his every want and need.

he drove you truly, madly, deeply insane.

“looks like the suns fully rising now,” he says looking over at the acute sunlight emitting from the window “my work here is done.”

“can i just stay like this for a while? i can’t feel my legs..” you croak, unable to even build minimum strength to prop your head up.

“of course you can” he murmurs against you, “i would never kick you out like that. i was gonna ask if you wanted to sleep here and cuddle, hm ?” pressing slow, lazy kisses to your shaky thighs, tracing patterns into them. he was a force to be reckoned with earlier but has now turned into a selfless gentleman right after.

“yes please, i’d love that. hold me in your arms forever and ever.”

tagging da homiez @pshbites & @leeechin 🙏🏽

[seventeenficsformalereader]

Wonwoo NSFW ABC's

REMINDER THAT ALL OF THIS IS FICTION! NONE OF THIS IS REAL OR REPRESENT THE REAL PERSON IN ANY WAYS WHATSOEVER‼️

Aftercare - How and how much

Wonwoo seems like a very caring type. He would gently clean up everything and maybe even change the sheets if you were too messy. Will give you cuddles afterwards, no questions asked.

Body parts - Fav body part on himself and his partner

Wonwoo likes his hands the most. He loves making you moan and cum with only his hands. Just watching your face as he fingers your hole is enough to make him reach his high, too

On your body, he loves your stomach area. Whether you're chubby, skinny, you have marks or anything like that, he absolutely adores your stomach area. It's also his favorite place to leave hickeys on.

Cum - Where, How, etc.

Like I said, Wonwoo loves your stomach area. That's why he usually likes to pull out and cum on your stomach. He might sometimes also finish inside of you if you ask him to.

Dirty Secret

Wonwoo once secretly took a video of him fucking you from behind and he keeps it in his phone buried so deep inside his gallery that no one could find it. He watches it sometimes to get himself off.

Experience

Wonwoo is the quiet guy, so I think back in high school he didn't get that much action. He probably had your first time with you and he was really nervous. Like REALLY nervous. But he wanted to make you feel good. And he did.

Favorite Position

Wonwoo loves missionary position the most. Mostly because it's easier to cum on your stomach, but also because he can look at your face as he pleasures you. There's nothing better than having your legs spread wide and on his shoulders as he rails into you at an animalistic pace.

Goofy - How serious or goofy is he during sex

Wonwoo is really serious during sex. It's a pretty new concept for him and he holds it as a important thing in his life. That's why he barely teases or jokes during it. He also might get embarrassed talking about it afterwards.

Hair - How groomed is he

Wonwoo doesn't bother shaving down there, but he does it occasionally. He just doesn't see the point since he's not the one who loves recieving oral so much. He would prefer you to keep it pretty clean down there though, because he likes to suck you more.

Intimacy - Is he romantic or rough, etc.

Wonwoo is a bit of both. If he's at a time in his life where he's not stressed, he can be really romantic and pleasure you in every way possible so gently that it makes you cry. But if he's stressed out or has a lot of pent up anger in him, he can and will take it out on you (only if you allow him to, which you usually do. You can't say no to rough sex once in a while)

Jack off - How often does he do so

Wonwoo didn't jerk off before he started dating you. He just didn't see the appeal of it. But after his first time with you, he realized that he probably needs go do it once in a while. He just sometimes can't keep his thoughts away from you and your body and can't help but get hard at the thought of it. Usually just jerks off while looking at the secret video he has of you or just looks at your nudes or just pictures of you.

Kink - What kinks does he have

Wonwoo isn't a super kinky guy, but he might have a few.

Wonwoo seems like the type of guy to like breath play. Something about restricting you from breathing occasionally by wrapping a hand around your neck while he fucks you deeply is what makes him want to continue even more. And the noises you make are so lovely, he wants to hear those more. He loves to hit all the right spots to make the most sounds out of you.

Location - Favorite place

Wonwoo prefers the bed. In his own bedroom. That's where he feels like he won't be interrupted and be embarrassed with someone catching him and his partner in the act.

Motivation - Turn ons

Again, Wonwoo loves the sounds you make. You sound so pretty maoning his name under him. And covering you in his cum is just a must every time. When he sees your body glistening under the dim lights of his room because of his cum, it makes him want to go for another round always.

No - Turn offs or things he wouldn't do or be into

He wouldn't like leaving the bedroom. Having sex anywhere else where someone might catch you is a no go for him. He's a pretty jealous guy when he's with you, and wouldn't want anyone else seeing your body the way he does. Sometimes he joins you in the shower, but only if he's sure that absolutely no one else can get in when you aren't wearing any clothes.

Oral - preferences on it

Wonwoo loves to give you head. He isn't a fan of recieving it.

Pace - How fast or rough during sex

Like I said before, Wonwoo can be slow and gentle, but he can also be very rough and merciless with you. It depends on his mood, and if you are willing to let him be rough. But even when he is rough, he's still constantly checking up on you. If he goes too fast that makes you cry out, he immediately stops and asks if you are okay. Once you reassure him that you're okay, he continues with his fast pace.

Quickie - His thoughts on quickies

Wonwoo prefers to take his time with you, and he usually isn't THAT needy, but if you are, he understands and takes you to a secluded area where there's a little to none chance that someone catches you. He's willing to move out of his comfort zone and fuck you in semi public if you are too needy

Risk - How risky is he

Like mentioned, he doesn't like having sex in public. He prefers his own bedroom or someplace else where no one can catch you.

Stamina - How long can he last, How many rounds

Wonwoo is used to dancing for many hours so he has a pretty good stamina. He can go for rounds, making you cum many times in the process and watching your body get covered in cum.

Toys - Use or Own any

Wonwoo doesn't like to use toys since he wants you all to himself. Except might put an anal plug on you sometimes just to remind you who you belong to.

Unfair - How much does he tease

Wonwoo is a very serious guy. He doesn't tease you a lot, but he might show his weird side for you sometimes, maybe during sex but also just because he can.

Volume - Volume during sex

Wonwoo might let out a few moans if he's close or if he goes many rounds. But usually just gets embarrassed and tries to keep his voice more quiet to hear you better.

Wild card

Wonwoo absolutely loves you riding him. Sometimes he's horny but too lazy to do anything so he makes you do all the work and let you ride him until your legs give out.

He's also pretty freaky with hickeys. Especially on your stomach area. He loves to leave hickeys there so he knows you are his even when no one else sees it. Bonus if you wear a a shirt that exposes your stomach and the hickeys are visible for everyone. He secretly enjoys it.

X-ray - Lenght, Girth, Curve

Wonwoo is a quiet kid. Need I say more? Everything about this man is so big dick energy and he definitely has one.

Yearning - Sex drive, horniness

Wonwoo has a high sex drive. When he's alone with you even for a bit, he will not keep his hands off of you. Whether it's giving you hickeys, touching your thighs, pushing his fingers inside you, grinding against you, or making you ride him.

Zzz - How fast does he fall asleep

Wonwoo is pretty sleepy after being satisfied. He cleans up the mess and falls asleep almost immediately once he has you in his arms.

[7ndipity]

Friends With Benefits Headcannons

Ot7 x Reader

Summary: How they would handle being in a fwb relationship(as well as some of their preferences in bed)

Warnings: +18 mdni, smut. Mentions of oral (m and f receiving), bondage, degradation, marking,

A/N: Could not get this concept to leave me alone while working on requests, so I thought I’d subject you all to my brainrot as well, bc I mean, that’s kinda the point of this blog, right?(sorry not sorry)

Masterlist

°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

Jin:

Was slightly hesitant when you first brought it up, but quickly came around to the idea. (Might have had feelings for you already, and knows that’s a no-go in these kinds of relationships, but in his mind that just made the shift in dynamic that much easier.)

Starts out really soft and sweet with you, not wanting to shock you or make you uncomfortable, but gets increasingly more intense and kinky as y’all get more comfortable with each other.

Is obsessed with your thighs and holds onto them for dear life when you ride him. Not so secretly loves ‘accidentally’ leaving marks on them.

Wants to be tied up and be used and edged till he’s crying from overstimulation.

So fucking loud in bed, you’ve had to cover his mouth a few times to keep others from overhearing the two of you(turns out he likes that though, as well as choking)

The emphasis in your relationship is still on ‘friends’ tho. Half of the time you hang out with everyone else like normal, but there are those nights when one of you asks under your breath “can you stay after the others leave?”

Lowkey starts getting a little possessive after a bit, fucking you like he’s got something to prove if he catches you looking at someone else. “Saw how you were looking at them. Bet they can’t fuck you this good, yeah? Can’t make you cream like this cock.”

Probably winds up confessing his feelings to you bc of this, but then you admit you’ve been feeling the same way. Turns out you’re just two idiots in love(good for y’all👍)

Yoongi:

Just comes out with it one day when y’all are hanging out, like “You wanna hookup?”

He’s super respectful about it, of course, but there’s a casualness to his approach that makes it easy to talk about. You wouldn’t know this was his first fwb arrangement from the way he acts.(He’s thought about it before, but he’s never actually followed through)

Chronically calls you in the middle of the night, asking if he can come over cause he can’t sleep.

Obviously, he’s Mr. Tongue Technology for a reason. He won’t even put his dick near you until you’ve cum on his mouth at least once, arms hooked around your thighs to keep you right where he wants you.

Surprisingly soft in bed, unless he’s had a really frustrating week, and then he’s pounding into you so hard you can’t walk right the next day, running his mouth the whole time like “Such a pretty little cocksleeve.”

He tends to feel really guilty afterwards though, so his aftercare is god tier. Warm baths and reassuring words, massaging any sore muscles, will even cook for you if you want.

Addicted to kissing you. Will straight up ask you, like “I’m bored, wanna make out?” He’s not content until he’s sucking on your tongue.(might have a slight oral fixation)

I could see him maybe catching feelings? But if he does, you will never know unless you bring it up first, cause he will take that shit to the grave before fucking things up with you.

Hobi:

Oddly enough, I think he would really love this dynamic? Like there’s something just so comfortable about the fact that it’s you and him that makes it easy for him to let go.

When the subject came up, he kinda just went with it, almost out of curiosity, but he very quickly became addicted to feeling of you around him.

Love, love, loves sneaky quickies, dragging you off to the bathroom when you're out with friends, having to be as silent as possible so no one overhears y’all, despite him pistoning himself into you as fast as humanly possible. Knowing you’re going around the rest of the night with his cum leaking out of you makes him crazy.

The term ‘sweet but psycho’ comes to mind, bc you never know which Hobi you’re going to get; The sweet one that kisses and caresses you softly as he rolls his hips into yours, or the dark one that shoves your face down in the pillows as he relentlessly pounds into you from behind.

Has a way of saying the filthiest things so that they’re somehow almost sweet? “You’re my little whore aren’t you? No one else’s, only mine.”

Loves buying you things to you to model/wear for him, mainly lingerie, but it can be anything he saw and thought you’d look cute in(not jewelry tho, he worries about that coming off as too intimate or relationship-y)

Ends up catching feelings, but takes so long to confess that it’s obvious to everyone but him.

Namjoon:

This dynamic would work really well for him, until it doesn’t.

When you first suggested the idea, he was super into it. He has a fear of getting over-attached, so he likes the easy, casual nature of it, but he’s a romantic deep down and that starts to bleed into his actions.

Tends to call you when he’s stressed, fucking all of his frustrations out into you, pounding into you from behind with your face burried in the pillows.

Other times, he’s so soft and tender, kissing and worshipping every inch of you while fucking you so nice and slow you could cry(and you have)

Loves watching you suck him off, real slow and sloppy like, and has invited you to his studio on multiple occasions for the sole purpose of this, cause it’s one of his favorite fantasies.

His other favorite tho is when you pin his hands to the bed and ride him(he’s mentioned it in too many songs to not mention). Watching you take control and use him for your own pleasure drives him wild.

I could see him fucking up and saying I love you during sex, though whether he realizes at the time is debatable.

Jimin:

Neither of you exactly brought it up, things just sort of escalated after a few too many drinks, and suddenly you were on his lap making out.

Once your brains managed to catch up, you kinda sat back like wtf?! But you both admitted you really wanted to continue, so things just kinda progressed naturally from there.

Honestly, It’s so close to dating, idk why y’all don’t just admit you love each other and save the trouble of ‘sneaking around’(Poor Jk has walked in on too many things that he can’t unsee)

Gets off on your pleasure, would happily spend the whole night with his head between your legs if you’d let him.

Needs to keep his mouth busy at all times. Will just come up to you, pouting like 🥺“I want kisses.”

Found out he was into choking by accident while you were riding him once and lost your balance and your hand slipped to his neck and he almost came on the spot. The feeling of you controlling his breath makes him lightheaded in more than one way.

His favorite is when you spoon/sit behind him and jerk him off, one hand on his cock and one hand around his throat, whispering the sweetest filthy things in his ear the whole time.(Call him ‘good boy’ and his knees will buckle)

Taehyung:

Probably brought it up first out of morbid curiosity as you were both talking one night, but was so relieved you said yes.

Y’all are almost more cuddle buddies than anything else bc he just loves casual affection, holding you close, tracing his hands over your skin.

When y’all do have sex though, he’s super intense. Lots of eye contact and deep kisses as he rolls his hips into yours, practically laying on top of you(or you on top of him, he’s not choosey). He just wants to be as close to you as humanly possible.

Likes taking you out on lil dates, even though you told him that’s not quite what fwb’s do, but he doesn’t care. He considers it a form of foreplay, plus he just likes to spoil you.

Really gets off on you marking him up. He loves finding your little masterpieces scratched into his back the next morning and wears them with pride.

One of his favorites tho is watching you fall apart on his fingers, especially while yours are wrapped tightly around his cock.

Has called you multiple times in the middle of the night while jerking off because he cums better to the sound of your voice.

Might end up catching feelings, but it would take him a bit to realize because of the aesthetically romanticized way he views your relationship.

Jungkook:

He was probably the one who brought it up initially, half joking, like “Well, why don’t we just fuck?” But then when you started actually considering it, he was like 😳”holy shit wait really?!”

Honestly, he does quite well with this arrangement, it almost becomes a weekly routine for the two you: you meet up, you hang out/have dinner, you fuck. Sounds like the perfect evening to him, tbh.

He’s actually such a big softie. Loves slow, deep sex where it just hands trailing everywhere, lips on lips, swallowing each other's moans and sighs. (He doesn’t admit it at first, but he loves it when you sleep over so he can hold/cuddle you.)

But he also loves being rough with you, manhandling you into whatever position he wants and pounding into you till you're screaming his name.

(honestly, he probably goes between both styles in the same session)

He has crazy high stamina, so y’all almost always go multiple rounds, not stopping till both of you are absolutely wrecked (“I’m not done yet, understand?”)

Wants you to sit on his face, and I mean sit. He gets so irritated with that hovering bullshit and will pull you down on him. “What, you think I can’t handle it or smth?!”

It wouldn’t be a Jk list if I didn’t bring up his possessive streak, so yeah, don’t let him catch you looking at anyone else, unless you want to not walk properly tomorrow. He doesn’t care that y’all aren't a technical couple, your his and he’s yours.

Taglist:@sopebubbles-replies @btsw1fe @this-must-be-my-tardis @whitefoxgirl @bethanysnow @coffeedepressionsoup @main-bangtansmauyeondan @captainorangegoose @k4ngelz

[dalamjisung]

A muted shade of green ✧ Chapter 3: X marks the spot

genre: finally some fluff! still some angst, but some fluff too!

word count: 5804

pairing: reader x spencer reid

description: you need spencer back home. so spencer comes back home. simple as that.

a muted shade of green masterlist

previous chapter // next chapter

author's note: you folks are amazing! thank you so much for the support and I know this chapter is a bit duller (aka famous filler chapter) but y/n needs a break from pain and suffering all the time lol <3 if you want to join the taglist for this series, please let me know in the comments!

“She knows who I am.” 

That is the sentence that sets off Plan B. 

Spencer’s instructions are clear: call Penelope and go to the BAU. Office Kaper is to stay with you at all times until you enter the FBI and even then, he will personally deliver you to her caring hands, and for once, you don’t argue. In what has been a very dark past few days, you think that Penelope’s bright colours might do you well. “I have to close the shop,” You tell him on the phone, already changing from your sleeping shorts into some jeans, but keeping his hoodie. Right now, you’re not focused on appearances; you’re focused on getting the hell out of there. 

“That’s fine, but keep Officer Kaper with you. Was the envelope delivered to my place?”

“No,” You breathe out, backpack on and ready to go. Nodding to man that has become your loyal companion, the two of you walk out of the building like any civilian couple. It’s unsettling, watching a man that is not Spencer wear his clothes, but he had to blend in so you two didn’t stand out. 

“And he’s wearing my clothes?” 

You turn to look at Officer Kaper and you snort despite the situation. “As best as he can, though he is considerably shorter than you, Spence.”

“You’re calling me Spence,” He says, and even his voice sounds a bit more at ease. Somehow, in the midst of this craziness, you two find time to ease back into what once was and you manage a small smile despite the anxiety rushing through you. “I missed that.”

“I miss you,” Is what you say back, and you blame it on the adrenaline of being outside, so open and vulnerable to prying eyes. “I… I feel safer when you’re here.”

“I know,” You swear you hear something skin to a smile on his voice. “I’m on my way back.” 

“Yeah, in like three days,” Talking on the phone and closing your shop is no easy feat. You’re no genius and having to split your focus onto two different tasks is quite hard, but you manage. You don’t want to let him go yet, scared that one you can’t hear his voice, he’ll be as good as gone. 

“No, I’m on the jet right now, I should be landing in an hour.”

You shouldn’t feel this happy about having Spencer come back this soon and probably in the middle of an active case, but when a psychotic killer starts sending you handwritten letters, you feel entitled to being a little selfish, even if guilt and anxiety are mixed it like the perfect emotional cocktail. “You didn’t have to,” You say, biting your nails when you finally grab everything you need and lock the door behind you. “Spence, I– thank you.” 

“You need me home,” Is all he says before announcing he has to go.

The silence doesn’t make things easier. Now that you don’t have to split your mind in two to multitask, you can fixated on the fact that this is serious. This is quite serious– Cat Adams has just confirmed she knows you. She has also, however, confirmed she does not know where you are, and just like you told yourself before, you have to believe that there is something better than this out there. There is a moment in time, reserved and crafted by the sisters of fate, in which Cat Adams gets bored with you. You are no longer a struggling rat under the weight of her paws, and she is no longer entranced by how you try to wriggle out of maniacal grasp. In another moment, another sliver of an alternate reality, Cat never even finds out who you are. You like that reality a bit better, because then you also don’t know who she is, and the knowledge of her presence and her impact on Spencer’s life is as weightless as a feather. 

While the city passes by you, the taxi ride to the FBI not as quick as you’d like with the early morning traffic, you allow yourself one more scenario. One more reality. 

In this one, you live in an apartment with muted green walls. Your furniture is that fancy, dark shade of oak and you don’t have to keep your books on the store; instead, you have space to add them to your decoration. You have shelves and shelves of books lining your walls and you think you’ve never seen anything more beautiful than that place. The windows, large and usually covered by cream blinds, are open to allow some sunshine inside. In this reality, you’ve told Spencer all about the benefits of sunlight to your books– none of them true, of course, but he still pretends to believe you, and he still opens the windows before leaving for work. This time around, you dream big– in this alternate life, Spencer never even met Cat Adams. He never even applied to the FBI, in this odd, hallmark version of your story. It doesn’t really matter what he does, but all that matters is that you get to be with him. You get to wake up next to him, to talk to him, to call him… hell, you even get to kiss him! 

This reality, as utopian as it seems, it’s fragile, though. Unrealistic. Spencer loves his job, you know that now. A world where you keep him from it can’t truly be a perfect world, not when he’d be so, so unhappy without his team standing next to him. “Ma’am,” Officer Kaper calls. “We’re here.” 

“Oh!” Grabbing your backpack, you follow him inside, feeling a bit awkward at the way people started at your with puzzled looks on their faces. “Wait! Before you leave, this is for you! You mentioned your daughter likes stories and that she’s about five or so, so these should be fun!” Children’s book is one of your secret passions, and you’re happy to see him smiling as he looks through the titles. 

“You really didn’t have to, Miss Y/L/N.”

“I really wanted to, though,” You smile. You need some light in your life as you walk those beige hallways. “Let me know if she wants more– her dad is a hero, so we have a special deal at the store for you.” 

“I’ll tell little Jane that a very nice lady from work gave her new books then,” He says, nodding as Penelope rushes to your side. “Call me if you need anything else, Miss Y/L/N, I’m happy to help. If it makes you feel better, you’ve been dealing with this exceptionally well. It can’t be easy.”

The validation has you pursing your lips, trying to hold back the need to hug him. In no way, shape, or form are you two close– to be honest, this is the most you’ve spoken with Officer Kaper during the forty-eight hours you spent together; and yet, his opinion seems to mean something to you. Your hands hide behind your back and you exhale sharply, nodding at him, eyes glassing over with emotion. “Thank you,” You whisper, head whipping at the familiar sound of heels waddling down the hall. “I’ll uh, I’ll go… but thank you. For everything.” 

He just nods, leaving with a wave and a smile. 

“Either you joined the FBI since we last saw each other or this sweatshirt belongs to a certain genius man,” Penelope says, looking at you with the ghost of a smile. If you didn’t know any better, 

“What? Oh. Yeah, I borrowed it from Spence,” You mumble, hands nervously fidgeting with your backpack. There isn’t much of anything inside, and you think you got flustered when you had Spencer on the phone telling you to get ready to go. All you remember is packing your toothbrush, a couple of books, and some underwear. “Oh, sweet girl,” Penelope sighs, her arm light on your shoulders, guiding you through those horrid halls. You think you hate the FBI headquarters more than you hate Cat Adams, and that is saying something. “Everything will be okay. Boy genius is on it, and he’ll figure this out in no time.”

“Seven days is quite a lot of time,” It’s not fair, how your words make her frown, but you have no one else. The words tumble out of your mouth before you can control them because this is what you’ve been dying to do since you first left that goddamned office, seven fucking days ago. And that is your regret– not talking to Spencer when you had the chance, not letting him talk to you, not… not letting him be therefor you. “God, seven days is a lot– it’s a whole week! I don’t know what you believe in, but if you’re Catholic, God created the Earth in seven days and– well, six days and Sunday he rested, but honestly, semantics. And it’s a whole week, one-fourth of a month. Seven days, and– and–“

“I am not judging you, because I am the biggest yapper of this team,” Penelope cuts right in, hand up in the air between you two. “But you need to breathe. I know seven days is a lot. And I hate that you’re in a position that you feel like you need to count the days. But there are no better people to have on your corner than this team. I promise you, Y/N, and– look!” She shakes her phone in front of your face. “Lover boy just landed! He’ll be here soon, so for now, please sit down and drink some tea?”

The door in the end of many, many hallways later is her office. You don’t really understand the juxtaposition of Penelope Garcia, and that’s okay– you might not understand her, but at least, with her, it feels like what you see is what you get. She wears her authenticity on her sleeve and you actually feel at ease around her because of it. There is not an ounce of ambiguity, not a shred of secrecy coming from her. She looks at you– really looks at you– and in her eyes you know how she feels. Penelope, unlike the rest of the team, is not a trained profiler, and even though you are quite limited in your knowledge of what exactly a profiler like Morgan and JJ does, the internet provided you with enough general background that you know just how… proficient… they are in hiding their own selves from the world. Apparently it’s a part of the job, but at one point, you have to wonder just how intrinsic is the job and their overall selves, and if when Spencer comes back home, does he leaves the job behind or is he always on the clock?

“Here, it chamomile,” The mug is bright pink and purple, and despite the room being dark and cold, you see how she has made it her own. The figurines and stickers on the screens around you make you smile weakly, sipping on the tea while sitting down next to her. Her screens are locked, and you are thankful for that– it makes you feel like at least someone is trying to separate you and the world you never wanted to know existed. “How are you feeling?”

You shrug a little, finger running around the rim of the cup. “I… I’m scared. And this feels really stupid, you know? It’s not even about me, but I’m the one kicking a fuss about everything,” Shaking your head, you let out a big exhale, like you have been holding it in for the longest time. “All because of a silly crush, oh my god…” 

“Wait… Wha– What…?” 

“I know,” You laugh at yourself, that type of chuckle that is so dry and void that even you worry. Underneath it all, underneath all the anger and the confusion and the disbelief, you think you just feel… dumb. You feel stupid. Like you’ve played yourself, and poor Spencer doesn’t even know. “How stupid am I? Getting a serial killer on my back, all because I liked a boy? And it’s not even like he likes me back, so this is all just… so fucked up. I wish I could go visit her and tell her that I don’t have Spencer, not like how she thinks I do.” 

“You like Reid?” Her smile is so big that her voice comes out all weird and squeaky. “You actually have a crush on little boy genius?”

“I–“ The hesitation in your voice is obvious. “I did. Spence is just so kind. And gentle, and loving, and he has this huge heart, you know? He used to bring me coffee every day he visited, and he would tell me all these really cool facts about the most random things, and I swear, I loved listening to him talk.” Without even realising, you’re smiling, wide and true, for what it felt like the first time in forever. You bring your legs up on the chair, hugging your knees close just to feel that sense of security it brings you, grounding you in the moment. The memories of your time with him, your favourite customer, are precious to you; and much like old time treasure, you hide it in the depths of your mind, away and untouched by prying hands of people around you. 

Except, Cat Adams found your map. 

And X marks the spot. 

It’s just a matter of time until she finds the golden chest and picks at the lock. 

Slowly, your smile slips away. “But now… now things changed, you know?” You gulp, not having the capacity to face the pitiful look she gives you without crying. And you’re tired of crying. 

“You didn’t change. Reid didn’t change, he’s still the same kind and gentle and loving man…!” You’re almost swayed by the desperation behind her voice. Penelope is a great friend and you can’t believe you were once jealous of her, but even then, you grimace. It’s not like you don’t want to let yourself be guided by these feelings– you want to let the butterflies loose, you want to allow yourself the giddiness of being with him, you want to have this quintessential girlhood experience, but the threat looming over your head pushes you down and away. You’re scared and you have all the reason to be. 

“Haven’t I?” You ask, cocking your head to the side. “Anyways, at the risk of sounding like a middle schooler, it’s not like he likes me either.”

“Y/N, he– he’s different,” Penelope whispers, reaching for your hand. “He’s afraid of germs and rambles a lot and he’s been hurt before, but please, if you just give him a shot, I think you could be really good for him.” 

“How would you know?” You’re not trying to be rude, you even smile a little, but the question stood– how would she know? You two had very limited interactions. 

“Because he talks a lot about you, and… well,” She confesses, chuckling like she had just done something naughty. When she points at the screens though, you gasp. “I know more about you thank you think.”

That makes your blood run cold. “You– what– what did you find out?” 

“Not as much as I could’ve!” She quickly promises, turning to the screen and quickly pulling up a file. The first thing you see is your driver’s license, and you wince at the picture. “This is all I managed to get before Reid put a ban on me!”

“He put a ban on you looking me up?” 

“Yes, he said he didn’t want to cheat and that he wanted to wait for you to tell him whatever you wanted to tell him,” Her words come out so fast you barely understand them, but it still tugs at your heart. “He said you didn’t know who he was because you didn’t know he worked for the FBI, and I tried telling him that’s not all he is! I did, but Reid is a stubborn, stubborn genius and wouldn’t listen to me! But he is, Y/N, he is much more than this job and–“

“I know that,” You whisper, eyes running through the documents on the screen. Degrees, past addresses, old jobs, family… and past relationships. Your body tenses up at the small list of names, one in particular making you gulp, glancing quickly at Penelope. “This is all, right? You… you didn’t dig more, right?” 

“Yes, this is all! I promise! To be very honest, I could find anything I wanted, but as I mentioned, I’ve been banished and threatened with a long, long lecture on privacy laws.” 

Her words echo in your mind for a moment, eyes unmoving from the bright screens. “Anything?” 

Penelope looks at your with hesitation. “Anything that has been online, yeah. Why?”

Sitting back down, you take a deep breath and nod. “Show me Cat Adams.”

“Oh… Oh, Y/N, no, no no no, I can’t–“

“Yes, you can! You just said you can find anything and, honestly how hard would it be for me to pick up my phone and Google her? If the FBI made the arrest, I’m sure media has picked it up!” Before you can even reach for the device, Penelope is grabbing it, hiding it behind her. “Penelope, please! This woman wants to kill me, I deserve to know what she looks like!”

Your voice is hushed, the undertone of desperation seeping through every word. “What if she gets out?” 

“Y/N, she has a life sentence, she’ll never get out.”

“You don’t know that!” This is what scares Penelope, the way you screech in panic, hands flying to the neck of the hoodie and tugging it away from you like you need it to breathe. “You don’t know that and I need to know what she looks like! Please, Penelope, I’m begging you!”

The tension in the room is palpable, but you know you got through her when she sighed. “I’m doing this for your protection,” It’s more like she’s talking to herself, so all you do is nod quietly, getting up and walking to the back of her chair. “Are you ready?” 

“Yes,” You are holding your breath while you squeeze the back of her chair, trying to keep yourself upright for a moment that could easily throw off your balance. 

In all honesty, you are not sure what you’re expecting. The little you know about black widow killers comes from a fictional world of made up characters, a place where the fantastical magic of made up stories meets the trauma ridden lives of turbulent characters. In them, these killers are beautiful. In fact, their beauty is their weapon, right before their grace and intelligence. It’s almost sick, how you remember liking those stories so much you once called it ‘a form of female empowerment’, and just thinking about it has your stomach tied in a bunch of knots, each one pulling and tugging at you in a rhythm that is too chaotic to not have you hunched over, panting next to Penelope like the photo she pulls up on her computer has just punched you in the gut. 

Because despite all your silent prayers, Cat Adams, in her orange jumpsuit and messy prison hair, is gorgeous. It’s something about her eyes, so cold and distant, yet holding an invitation that even you might not be able to resist. Is this how she draws men in? Is this how she drew Spencer? “I–“

“Garcia, what are you doing?!” 

Both of your turn around at the same time, both of you shocked at the sight of Spencer, in all his sweater vest glory and red face anger, marching towards you both. “Take it down.” 

You have never heard him sound so cold. “Spence, I asked her to pull it up. I was curious.”

“She should’ve known better, she’s an FBI agent!” Now he is screaming, and you can’t help but feel overcome with a familiar type of shame. Part of you, a specific part you left back in New York, expects him to to keep screaming. It’s the part of you that unconsciously pushes the tea mug away. It’s the part of you that looks at the door and feels relieved to see it unlocked. It’s the part of you you’ve been hiding from him and everyone else you met since you’ve moved. 

It’s the part of you Spencer just noticed. 

“I’m sorry,” He says, squinting his eyes at your so quickly it’s almost imperceptible. Almost. “I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have screamed, I’m just–“

“On edge,” You whisper, nodding in agreement. “We all are, Spence. Don’t scream at her, please.”

“I know, I know, I’m really sorry,” This is more like him– shy eyes casted down between glances here and there. “I just don’t want you wasting your time on someone like her. She doesn’t deserve it.” 

No one says anything for a while. Until you notice it. 

“Spence,” You mumble, smiling a little in an attempt to ease the high emotions in the room. “You cut your hair.” It’s shorter now. His shaggy curls still peek out, but it looks more… grown, even if it enhances his boyish charm. 

“I did,” He mumbles, blushing a little. For a second, he looks at Penelope, like he’s asking her what to say and what to do. “It was getting too long.”

“It looks really good.” 

“Thank you, Y/N,” God, you love when his voice gets low and airy like that. Garcia is looking between you two with a certain kind of spark in her eyes and it makes you shift on your feet. “Uh, shall we go home?” 

“You’re going back to your apartment?”

“Yeah, Officer Kaper said that the letter came with the batch of mail they got from Y/N’s apartment, so it’s safe to assume she has no knowledge of her current whereabouts,” Spencer picks up your backpack without even asking, smiling at you innocently. “I reviewed the security footage you sent of my apartment entrance and there is no suspicious activity happening during the days I was gone. And, well, you know, I’m here now. She’s safe.” 

No one will ever understand the amount of relief you feel in that exact moment. “Thank you for coming back.”

“You need me home,” Is all he says before guiding you away. When you turn to say bye to Penelope, she is smirking, giving you two thumbs up and a giggle. In the midst of all this mess, you actually feel happy to have someone allowing you to enjoy a moment of silliness. “Are you okay? Do you feel a bit better?”

“Now that you’re back, yeah,” You sigh, sticking close to him as you pass by a group of agents. “Officer Kaper is really sweet, but he’s not you, he’s not–“

“Familiar,” Spencer says, but you shake your head. 

“He’s not my friend.” 

“And I am?” The hope in his eyes crushes your heart. You never meant to make him feel like you had left him behind, but you know you have pushed him away when he tried to stand by you. 

No more. 

“You are, Spence,” You breathe out, hand gently falling on his arm and squeezing it adoringly. “You’re my favourite customer and I guess now you’re my living room-mate. But you should really sleep in your bed tonight, okay?” The joke is just an attempt to make him smile, and you’re happy to see it works.

“Will you sleep next to me?” 

His question is not that unexpected, really, but it still makes you freeze in place. “Uh… What… What do you mean?” 

“Sleep next to me,” His bluntness doesn’t help with the way your cheeks fire up. “I know you’re scared, so if you’re next to me, I’ll be watching over you at all times. I’m a light sleeper, so even if something happens, I’ll wake up. We can put pillows between us, if the thought of me that close to you makes you uncomfortable and–“

“It doesn’t,” You say before you can give up on it. “I just… I know you’re a germaphobe and I don’t know how many germs can be shared when you sleep next to someone and I wouldn’t want to make you uncomfortable.”

“Actually, when you sleep next to someone, there is an exchange of bacteria and skin microbes when we turn and move around, but your brain compensates by releasing the ‘happy’ hormones because you’re sleeping next to someone you care about, so I wouldn’t mind the former much considering we would wake up pretty content.” 

Someone you care about. You hold your tongue back from asking him if he cares about you– at this point, you should know he does. You shouldn’t need the reassurance, as nice as it would feel to have it, but you really, really want it. In a time where everything is uncertain, you pray so that Spencer can be your constant. “Okay,” You nod, hand slowly slipping down his arm, brushing yours fingers through his, before letting it go altogether. Looking down to the ground, embarrassed with your own courage, you follow him out of the building. “The subway is that way.”

“We’re getting a taxi,” He mumbles, signalling one down as he spoke. “I don’t think public spaces with that much visibility are a good idea for now. I don’t want you paranoid, Y/N, but I need you to be careful, okay? Subways, buses, all of these get crowded and they have a large amount of surveillance. We still can’t figure out how Cat found out where you live or who is her connection that got your name through the UPS delivery, but we’re not stopping until we do, I promise you that. For now, we just ask that you be careful around people.”

“I work with people. I have to talk to them to sell them stuff… I can’t lose my store, it’s all I have!” The two of you turn to face each other on the back of the car. He is shaking his head before you can even continue, and when you feel it, the warmth of his hands covering yours, so much bigger and steadier to the point that is like he’s holding your fists in his palms, you hold your breath. 

“You won’t,” He whispers, shaking his head so gently that wisps of hair fall over his forehead and you have to fight the urge to push it back. “Y/N, you won’t. We’ll figure something out, okay?”

“Okay,” The trust you have in Spencer is enough to have you nodding along. Until the car stops in front of his apartment, he doesn’t let go of your hand, and you make no effort in letting go of his. 

It’s only when it’s time to pay for the ride that you pull away, faster than him in getting the money to the driver. “Hey!” 

“Be faster next time, boy genius,” You say, smiling tiredly while walking next to him through the hallways of his building until you reach Apartment 23. Using your key in front of him, the one he gave you when he went away, feels weird and oddly intimate. “Do you want this back?”

“Keep it,” Spencer says, giving you his trademark tight-lipped smile. The way his shoulders sag a little as soon as he is inside the familiar apartment has you frowning. He is exhausted, tired from flying and rushing through the city, but he still made the effort to come get you at the BAU. “What do you want for dinner? We can get some pizza.” 

“I have leftovers in the fridge,” You mumble, suddenly too out of place in the apartment you know at the palm of your hand. Standing in the entrance, you just look at him, watching him walk around the apartment so carelessly and you wonder if Spencer knows just how meaningful it is for you to have him back home. “I bought groceries, don’t worry, I didn’t use any of your food or anything like that.”

“I wasn’t worried, but now I am. I told you to be comfortable Y/N.” 

“I am…” You mumble, moving to sit down on the armchair. 

Under his watchful gaze, you’re not sure how much Spencer can get out of your behaviour right now. It’s a bit sad that you’re even thinking about this so consciously, observing him as he observes you right back. You know you will never win a battle of wits against the genius across the room, but no ones knows you better than yourself and that is currently your only leverage in this entire situation. But… why do you even need leverage? What is this war you have started with yourself and pulled poor Spencer in without even letting him know? The blanket you adore so much is right by your feet and you pull it up to cover your whole body, all the way up to your face. At this point, you don’t want him reading you because you’re afraid of what he will find. Specially because you don’t know what he will find. 

“What are you doing, Y/N?” When he sits on the corner of the chair, your body dips to the side, rolling closer to him. “Are you hiding?” 

“Yeah.” 

“And why are you hiding?” 

“Because you’re an avid reader,” Even you want to cringe at your own words. “And I’m not really sure what story I’m telling, right now.” 

His laughter takes you by surprise– this has to be the loudest you’ve heard Spencer be. “Y/N, what are you talking about? I’m not going to read you!”

“Spencer, you can’t help it! It’s what you do– I see the way you look at me, okay? I know what you’re doing, and I have to say I am not a fan!”

With one tug on the blanket, your face is exposed again with hair all over it. But then you see his smile, and it looks so honest and happy, like a version of him you thought you had left behind days ago. “You think I’m reading you?”

“Are you not?” You ask, sitting up to try and look at him with a serious expression. 

“No, Y/N, I’m not looking at you because I’m reading you.” 

There are moments in your life, unique and specific in their own credits, that you are sure you will never forget. The day you decided to leave New York is one of them– you bought tickets last minute and left with only a rucksack you found in the back of your closet. On the way to the airport, you called your parents, waking them up at three in the morning to tell them they were going to need to ship your stuff to a PO box address. Y/N, where are you going?, your mom cried out. What is going on? To which all you said was I’ll tell you when I can, before hanging up and throwing your SIM card out of the window. 

Opening your store was high in the list too. Not the day that you conceptualised it or rented the place– the day you truly opened it. The day your first customer, your favourite customer, walked in, that’s the day you truly opened the place. The day he bought a book and promised to come back again. 

Of course there are other dates, too; simpler dates. Birthdays, christmases, random family dinners. The small things that build-up to be big memories. But then there are the big things that are even bigger memories, and you’re intimidated, with the size of it all. It’s too big, too tall, and when you fall, it might just be high enough to break all your bones, but not kill you completely. No… that would be too merciful. 

This– Cat Adams, Spencer, the box– this is not just big. 

This is huge. 

In comparison, tonight is not all that big. In fact, his living room feels quite small now that both of you are back inside. The green walls descend and it’s just you and him, squeezed close in an arm chair you both love, surrounded by books you both love, and you still can’t help but feel afraid. This is as small as it gets, as monotonous as it gets, and yet, this is the most scared you’ve ever felt, because no matter what you do, it’s like you can’t stop climbing– you go higher, higher, higher. His words, replaying in your mind, keep pushing you up, without any regard of how you’ll ever come down. 

Truthfully, you don’t want to come down, even if he brings you down gently. 

“Then… why do you stare at me, Spence?”

He doesn’t answer you, shaking his head slightly before looking away and clearing his throat. Uncomfortableness doesn’t look good on him, and that is saying something, coming from the one person who thinks everything looks good on him. “I uh, I’ll heat up some of those leftovers. Shall I get you some, too?” 

Spencer might the profiler, but you are still able to read the blooming colour in his cheeks. “Yeah,” You say softly, I would love some, Spence.”

Dinner with him is peaceful. You’re learning how to live this new life with a plus one. You learn his habits and his quirks– you learn that he likes to put ketchup on his pizza and that he drowns his coffee in sugar. That despite his immense IQ, he still can’t quite cook for himself– or prefers not doing so. That he made sure his cleaning lady came during the times he was away to avoid small talk and human contact. You learn, through a lot of trials and a lot of success, that you are his one exception. 

For you, Spencer is malleable, and he has no qualms in moulding himself to your needs, except… except you don’t want him to do that. You don’t want him to be someone he’s not and you don’t want the Spencer you know and adore to be someone curated just for you. 

“I’ll go take a shower and change into some comfortable clothes,” He says after he finishes eating. “Thank you for the food.” 

“No problem.” 

“And Y/N?”

“Yeah?”

“You can keep that hoodie. You look good in it.” 

Just like that, you chuckle, shaking your head when he disappears behind the bedroom door. If Cat Adams has the map to your past memories, Spencer Reid has the map to your future ones. 

X marks the spot. 

And for him there is no lock to pick– the door is wide open. 

---------------------------------------

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[am-i-interrupting]

Affection | Vox x Fem!Reader

Summary: Vox and Valentino get into it. Vox looks for a way to get payback and stumbles upon you. He didn’t expect you to actually care.

Warnings: sex work, a bit of a mommy kink

He was used to the petty yelling, the constant spats, even the object throwing. What crossed the line was when he had to replace his screen.

Vox and Valentino got into a lot of arguments, normally started by the latter instead of the former. This one was bad though. Vox didn’t even want to think about it but it was all that was on his mind.

He was angry.

He was angry because it was easier to be angry rather than something else, something more vulnerable. He didn’t want to and couldn’t afford to be vulnerable right now. He had to hold onto this anger so he didn’t go crawling back to Valentino.

Currently, he was at his desk, looking through documents about ads that were just waiting for Vox’s stamp of approval. He stumbled upon yours and he paused.

He recognized you. Why?

He copied your name into a search bar and looked at your Sinstagram profile. Flipping through the pictures, he found one of you at a bar and that’s when he remembered.

Valentino tried to contract you and you’d basically laughed at him. You’d tossed back a shot and then turned to Valentino, asking if he needed you to pay for it since he was clearly so desperate for new recruits as he was only preying on people too stupidly drunk to realize how bad of an idea it was to say yes. Oh, he remembered Valentino seething that night.

He approved your ad but he couldn’t get you out of his head. He opened the closed tag again as he actually read through your ad.

You were advertising music. Which, when say side by side with your Sinstagram made sense as he saw a picture of you with Verosika Mayday. There wasn’t really anything interesting on the advert.

He scrolled up to the top of your Sinstagram in order to look at them in order from most to least relevant. That is when he caught sight of a link in your bio. He clicked it.

He was brought to a website. He wasn’t sure what he expected but he did raise an eyebrow nonetheless. It was an escort sight. A home page that had you and several other people scantily dressed with a description of what every person and the services you offered.

Maybe he was being more vindictive than he thought because he immediately clicked on the tab that sent him to your page and booked a time with you.

It was far out, months away in fact. He honestly had forgotten about it until he got an email the week before asking if he was still available and inviting him to a pre-session consultation. Not willing to back out and have it potentially mess with his image, he made the time.

He logged into a video call several days later and was greeted with you in the middle of putting on your makeup.

“Well, hello, Mr. Vox,” you said with a soft purr. He replied with a formal greeting of your name. “You’re a busy guy and I’m a busy gal so I’ll keep this quick. This is just a little meeting for boundaries. I know it bothers some people to make them in person so I’ve found this to be an easier way.

“I’ll go first. No hickies, no bruises, no scratches, no cuts, no burns, just no marks. It might be pretty and fun in the moment but it costs me later. Not everyone enjoys having sex with someone who’s clearly had it with someone else not long before. It may be part of my work but people do like an illusion.

“I don’t do bondage where I’m the one tied up. It’s nothing personal, just a safety issue. On the topic of safety, if you bring in anything that could be used as a weapon. I’m done and you’re leaving. All I need from you is that pretty little body of yours and payment. I’ll provide the rest.

“On the topic of payment, I know you’ve already made your upfront payments for this little consultation. The rest can be brought when you come in cash. Any questions so far?”

He surprised himself by saying, “Not so far, no.”

You we’re far more thorough than he thought. He’d bought time before but it was never this professionally done, even by Valentino’s standards. Granted, with Valentino’s sex workers, there was really only one rule, payment upfront. He didn’t give a fuck about anything else.

You though? You had clearly given this a lot of thought on all parts.

“Good, I’m glad,” you said. “Those are my hard rules. Everything else is a little more flexible. So, tell me, what is it you want from tonight?”

“To have a good time.”

“Of course, we all want to have a good time, Vox, but I’m talking specifics. Don’t be naive,” you said. “I have full confidence you know better. Maybe it’d be easier if I told you what I’m best at.”

The lid of your lipstick clicked closed. You looked at the camera, looking at him directly on his screen by proxy, for the first time.

“I can do just about anything your cold, dead heart desires but I enjoy specific things more than others. I’m a bit of a dominatrix, I’d you will. I enjoy the power and control of giving people what they need instead of what they want. How does that sound to you?”

“It sounds to me like a very overlord thing to do,” he replied.

“Not there yet,” you said. “So, is that the role you prefer to play?”

“It’s one I play often.”

“Yes, I’ve gathered that but do you prefer it?”

Vox didn’t know why he didn’t just say yes. He should have. It went with his image to say yes and that’s why he was still agreeing to do this even though he and Valentino weren’t on the worst of terms right now.

He hadn’t crawled back to Valentino yet. It’d been one of their longer spells away from one another. Five months without even falling back into bed once.

Perhaps that’s why he said what he said. He was pent up. He hadn’t had time to unwind and the person he normally would go to for that he was still upset with. That’s the reason he’d go with anyway.

“It’s the role I play most often,” he said.

“But is it the role you like?” you asked. When he didn’t answer you smiled, a more genuine one than any flirty or sarcastic one you’d shot his way before. “Stubborn, I’ll keep that noted.”

“I am not—“

“You’re proving my point. Now,” you stood up and rummaged through a drawer he couldn’t see, “pick a set for me.”

For the next several hours, Vox felt like he couldn’t focus. He was nervous. He couldn’t even remember the last time he’d been nervous over a one night stand.

He left early, leaving his assistant with double the workload but he didn’t care. He just needed to be out of the building.

He took Vark out on a walk to pass time but it still went by so slowly. It took what felt like days for it to finally be time to leave.

He’d call it considerate that he left without his usual suit jacket, waistcoat, and tie but in reality, he felt so hot, constricted with them on.

He traveled through the cameras and arrived at the address he’d been given, not a single person having seen him.

He knocked on the door and that sense of security was promptly shattered when it opened and he heard someone say, “Holy shit!” in response to seeing him.

He glared at the offending person as he stepped in. He recognized them from being pictured on your website. They quickly spun around and continued doing whatever it was they were in the process of.

He was led to a room which when opened revealed you inside. You were wearing a shear robe that gave him a peak at what was hiding underneath.

“I was promised secrecy,” he said. “Not to be gawked at by the employees.”

“So you don’t want to be gawked at me?” you asked. You smiled at your own joke. “Everyone here is under contracted lock and key to not say a single word about what goes on inside these walls. You’re image will be fine.”

“Contracted?”

“You said I had the makings of an overlord,” you replied. “Why are you suddenly surprised that I have contracts? Don’t worry, I assure you they’re much more ethically sourced than your co-worker’s.”

He rolled his eyes.

“Speaking of,” you said as you took several steps towards him, “why are you here? I’d imagine you could have any of Valentino’s contracted cash free. Why waste it on me? I’m not exactly cheap.”

You held out your hand and he reached into a pocket to retrieve the other part of your payment. You swiftly began counting it.

“You fuck one of Valentino’s pets, you’ve fucked them all,” he said. “They’re all too scared to be any fun after a while.”

“As much as I know that’s a true statement—“ you put the cash in a drawer of the bedside table— “I don’t believe it.”

He felt his eye twitch. “And what exactly would you—“

“Why don’t you take off your shirt and lay on the bed?” You walked towards him and ran your hands up his torso. “Or I could take it off for you.”

You began unbuttoning his shirt and for some reason, it made him drop all his irritation. When you finished, you bent down and licked all the way up his torso. You kissed and nipped at his collar bone.

His hands went to your sides but you spatted them away. The shirt fell to the ground.

You looked up at him, like you were daring him to kiss you. However, when he went to do just that, you stepped away.

“On the bed face down, mister,” you told him.

He huffed. Despite his mind telling him to grab you and pull you in for a kiss, take you and remind you of who exactly you were messing with, his body followed your instructions.

The mattress dipped as you straddled him. Something popped open (he tensed), a bottle clinked as it was set on the table, and then the sound of you rubbing your hands together went through the air.

Your hands, warm against his skin and slick with oil, began to rub up and down his back.

“Why are you here, Vox?” you asked. “I’m not stupid. I keep up with the news. Did you think I wouldn’t notice that the day you made an appointment was the same day you updated your status to single again? It’s still single now so what happened?”

“Nothing happened,” he said.

“Uh-huh, and the fact that you visibly tensed as soon as I mentioned Valentino is just a coincidence,” you said. “Everything you say in these walls stays within them.”

“You’re the one who made the contracts,” he said. “You’re not under them.”

“True, but—“

You began to apply pressure with your thumb, grinding your thumb and hand in circles along his back.

“Oh, fuck.”

“—I also made them,” you said, basically repeating his words. “It means I place value in confidentiality.”

“Or covering you’re own— oh, fuck, right there— your own ass.”

“I could be.”

You leaned down and he felt toy trap his entire torso beneath you. He liked the feeling. He liked the feeling of you over him.

You got close to his face, “But I think we both know I’m not.” You moved back and he mourned the feeling as soon as it was gone. “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to. You’re just very obviously tense and not just physically.”

You punctuated your sentence by rolling the palm of your hand at the base of his neck before squeezing it lightly. He couldn’t hold back a moan at the feeling of some tension leaving his body.

You continued on like that in silence for a while. You were working out the knots in his muscles and he was basically putty beneath your hands.

He’d never been treated like this before. He had couldn’t remember the last time he felt loose. There was always some kind of feeling of unease he constantly carried.

He didn’t even know he needed this because he’d never known that he could have it.

You leaned to once again lay over him but this time he could feel the entire weight of your body instead of just your warmth. You wrapped your arms underneath his shoulders and placed a kiss to his neck.

“Are you alright to continue?” you asked him as you nuzzled against his shoulder blade.

“I—“ He tried to search for some witty or snarky remark to make but all he could come up with was, “Yes.”

You cooed at him and slipped your hands out from underneath him to rub his back as you got off him. “Using your words, what a good boy,” you said and he hated, hated how that made him feel so warm inside. “Can you turn around for me? Yes, good.”

He closed his eyes and refused to look at you. You laughed but it didn’t feel mean. That didn’t make him feel any less embarrassed, however.

You did a wider, full handed version of the back massage you’d given him to his front as you began to roll your hips against his. He couldn’t hold back a whine.

“Oh, so pretty,” you said. “Such pretty noises from such a pretty boy.”

“Fuck,” it came out weak and pathetic.

Well, it was fitting then because that’s how he felt, weak and pathetic. Such simply praise shouldn’t be so effective.

“How does that feel?” you asked. “Come on, be a good boy. Tell me. Tell me how to make you feel good, baby.”

You were kissing on his neck and shoulders now.

“Good,” he choked out.

You hummed against his skin.

He could feel his fingers flex. His arms moved. He stopped them. He wanted to touch. He should be able to touch. He should be able to do what he wanted. He was the fucking Vox, overlord and creator of the biggest tech company in Hell. He shouldn’t need permission to do something.

You grabbed his hands and brought them up to the knot of your robe.

“You can touch me, baby,” you told him.

A whine forced its way out of his throat no matter how much he tried to keep it at bay.

He opened his eyes and you were so beautiful, grinding against him like you were made to. He could feel his cock straining against his pants. He wanted them off.

He settled for untying your robe. It fell to reveal the deep blue set he’d chosen for you earlier that day. It was sheer enough to show off your nipples through the cross crossed pattern of the bra. There was a silver chain that draped between the cups and further framed your breasts. Some traps went around your torso as part of the garter belt which held up your similarly colored stockings. You looked gorgeous.

You laughed and guided his hands up to your waist. Then up to your tits.

“I love the way you keeping whining for me,” you said. “You’re like a little pup.” Your eyes honed on his neck and your hand followed your gaze. You pressed on his neck, just enough to add some pressure. “That neck of yours looks like it was made to be collared and leashed.”

“Oh fuck.”

You leaned closer to his face. “Would you like that, baby?”

His fingers twitched around your breasts. He rubbed his thumbs over your clothes nipples as a silent apology. “Please.”

“Oh, such good manners.” You applied more pressure to his neck, not enough to cut off his air supply. He arched into your touch. “But not tonight. Some other time, I promise. I’ve got a feeling I’ll be seeing you plenty, baby.”

You went to nip at his neck. His hands wrapped around to your back to hold you in place. Your own traveled down his torso and to his belt.

You undid it. You pulled down his pants but not his underwear. You slipped from his grasp.

You put your hands on either side of his bulge and ran your fingers over it. His legs spread open further as he tried to push up but you quickly put an end to that little action.

Your hands on his hips, you hovered your head over him. You licked a stripe onto the fabric. You began to suck him off with the barrier of his boxers.

He knew he was whining. His eyes wanted to screw shut but he kept them open, too transfixed by the visage before him.

Your own eyes were closed. Your hands, perfectly constraining his boxers, were wrapped around his hips. The tips of your perfectly manicured hands were digging into his skin. Your tongue lulled out and lavished him.

He could cum from just this alone.

However, as soon as the thought came to him, you pulled away.

“No, no, no, please, please, let me come,” he said, words flowing from his mouth before he could stop them.

“Aw,” you said with a chuckle, “begging so soon? How sweet. Don’t worry, baby, you’ll get to come soon. I’ve just got to see that little dick of yours first.”

The small bit of degradation mixed with all the praise made him twitch.

He’d never gotten any negative comments on his dick before. Rather the opposite, Valentino had tried several times before to talk him into at least faceless camera work but he didn’t want to think of the moth right now.

You pulled his underwear down to reveal his cock. It was length, a deep blue like the rest of him except were it was flushed vibrantly at the tip. He was already leaking pre-come. Milky white against his flesh.

You leaned over to lick it up. His eyes rolled back at the simple action.

Your smirked before you took him all your mouth at once. You slowly pulled up and let your teeth pull at the hood of his tip.

“Shit, shit, shit!”

He thrusted up into what was now just air as he twitched, his whole body convulsing but he didn’t come. He was on the verge though.

You shushed him as you stroked his inner thigh with your nails.

“Be a good boy for me and hand me the lube,” you said before you began sucking on the skin above his pelvic bone.

His hand went to your hair as he closed his eyes and moaned. It took him a moment to open them again but you didn’t seem to mind. He didn’t feel rushed.

When was the last time he hadn’t felt rushed while having sex? He couldn’t even remember. It was always about getting back to work as soon as possible or Valentino’s quick hits. It was never really about him. It was about getting rid of his boner or Valentino’s as soon as possible.

He liked this. He liked this feeling of. . . being cared for?

God, he was so fucking pathetic. He could feel tears filling his eyes as he reached for the lube on the bedside table.

“Are you alright, baby?” you asked. “Do you need to stop.”

“Fuck, please don’t.”

“Okay, we don’t have to stop. We can keep on going,” you said as you poured some lube into your hands. “You just keep on being a good boy for me, alright? You can cry if you need to, baby. It’s okay to cry, you know.”

That permission made it worse. He felt his face flush as tears began to stream down his face. This was pathetic. He was pathetic. He shouldn’t be crying. He’d rarely ever cried. Much less during sex, especially sex that he was enjoying.

“Can you bend your— oh, such a good boy,” you said.

You hooked his bent knees over your legs and pulled him into your lap.

You wrapped your hands, covered in warm lube (when was the last time someone had took the time to warm up lube before touching him?), around his cock and began slowly twisting your hands up and down. He couldn’t stop the weak thrusts.

“I’m sorry,” he said, repeating the phrase like a prayer.

“Shhhh, baby, it’s okay,” you told him, petting his thigh. “You take what you need. You’ve been so good for me. So good. You deserve it.”

“Fuck.”

He threw his head back against the pillow and then looked down at you. He immediately met your eyes, so soft and understanding. It made his stomach queazy.

He watched as his dick slowly was covered then revealed by your hand. It curved around him so perfectly, glistening with a mixture of lube and the pre-come he was leaking. You twisted your hand in just the right way.

You covered his cock and then revealed the head. You thumb lingered and smeared the pre-come at his tip. The point of your nail ever so gently grazed his hole and that’s what did it.

The lights flickered in the room as he spasmed and came. His screen went blank as he blacked out.

A few seconds later, he came to with you by his side with a glass. You tilted his head up and cupped your hand under his lips as you forced him to drink, any water that spilled was dropped in your hand.

You grabbed a cloth and wipes at his screen.

“Are you okay, baby? Was that good?” you asked and he could only mutely nod. “Good.”

You went to pull him into an embrace but stopped and looked down at your body. “Do you wanna clean me up or do you want me to do it?”

He followed your gaze and saw his come covering your torso, a bit of it even clinging to your bra. He leaned to lick it off you. You reclined onto the thrown of pillows and let him, stroking his shoulders and arms as he did.

He licked up to your bra and then was met with the rough contrast of the lace-like fabric compared to your smooth skin. He reached around and undid the bra. You let it fall and he licked where the come had been. Then he began sucking on your breasts.

“Oh, fuck,” this time it was you.

Spurred on, he reached down between your thighs and began stroking. You were wet, so fucking wet. His fingers slid through your folds with no hint of resistance.

He rolled your clit between two knuckles.

“Oh, so good for mommy,” you said as you continued petting him. “So good.”

He whined at both the praise and the title you had given yourself.

He began stroking you with a different purpose now. He needed you to come. He looked up at you, still sucking on your tit. He needed to see it.

Your breath quickened. Your pets turned into a tight hold. It was your turn to whine as your head rolled back and your mouth lulled open.

“So good! So good for me, baby, just like that,” you said right before you became incoherent. You groaned and moved up into his touch.

He went back to the tower feeling better than he could ever remember. The set you’d worn tucked into his pant pocket. You insisted, saying you had plenty of other sets. Who was he to refuse?

“Where the fuck have you been?” Velvette asked.

“Out,” he said as he walked passed her, in no mood for her screeching.

“For over two hours with your location turned off? You didn’t even answer your fucking phone,” Valentino said, voice raising to nearly as yell towards the end.

“Yes,” Vox said as he continued walking.

He heard Valentino laugh as he must have seen the lingerie set in his back pocket. “Were you really so busy fucking a hole that you couldn’t answer me? I hope they were good.”

“Better than you ever were,” Vox said before he closed his bedroom door, unwilling to let his lax mood be ruined.

A few months later, Vox was still going to see you. Absolutely hooked and you both knew it but so were you. You didn’t even made him pay but he still slipped money into your pocket or your bra so he wouldn’t have to face the fact that he was getting attached.

That was all thrown out the window when you released a new song. He wasn’t even halfway through watching the music video before he disappeared and found you, pulling you in for a bruising kiss and you knew exactly why.

The imagery in the music video was obvious. Pink smoke trying to creep into your studio only to be blocked, a deep blue body, TV screens everywhere. Then there were the lyrics:

I can give my babe affection without any type of infliction

You were just an intermission but I’m the center of attention

I’ve got him collared and leashed right where he needs to be

He’s down on his knees begging me with please

Better than any of his fantasies

Yeah, I’ve got his attention without infliction

[theyhavetakenovermylife]

HIII HELLO!! I love your writing style so much I absolutely adore it 💗💗!!

I was wondering if you could write for 2012 Donnie? Anything is fine!! Maybe some time in the lab or a slowburn!

I was also thinking about Donnie slowly falling in love with the reader, whos Casey's cousin? (We all know the fued between Donnie and Casey in some episodes so I thought this would be a fun idea!)

We love you and hope that you take care of yourself 💗 you're one tough cookie girl you got this <33

Casey’s Cousin (Angst?/Fluff)

2012!Donatello x reader

A/N: *shows my muscles* Though cookie I am! Just look at these bad bois! Anyway, I tried to make it slowburn and have a little bit happening in the lab, so I hope this checks that mark. This doesn’t go that deep into Donnie and Casey’s rivalry, but it does mention it. And I agree, it is a fun idea, so I hope you’ll enjoy this💜

Warnings: Talk of former heartbreak, but nothing bad.

Had someone told Donatello just a few years ago, that his crush on April wouldn’t lead to anything, and that she in fact would start dating Donnie’s rival when it came to April’s love, he would straight up have told them to leave. That was not something he was ready to hear. But to then be told not only would his crush start dating his rival, but the same rival’s cousin would then enter his life, and make him forget every single romantic thought he ever had about April, he might have told them that they were crazy. But in fact, that’s what happened.

When Casey and April started dating, Donnie was, to be absolutely honest, heart broken. There had been times where Donnie had expected it to happen, but to actually experience it was not something he was prepared for. In fact, it took him quite some time to fully get over it. It felt like a betrayal, like April had back stabbed him. But he was fully aware of the fact that that was not the case. April didn’t owe him anything, and if that was what she chose, then she had every right to be with Casey. Donnie just needed some time.

It took some time before Donnie felt like he was getting over it. A few months maybe. In that time he would avoid Casey and April whenever they came to visit, staying in the garage lab while they hung out with his brothers. He just wasn’t ready to face them yet.

But then one day, Donnie was forced to face them, but not for the reasons he had expected. No, it was because of you.

One day Casey and April came to the lair to visit the turtle brothers. However this time, they didn’t come alone. They had brought you, Casey’s cousin, with the intention to introduce you to their friends. And though you were shocked when you first stepped a foot into the lair, not expecting to meet a bunch of humanoid turtles, it didn’t take long before you found yourself getting comfortable with them. And then you met Donatello.

It was April who brought you to the lab, pulling you by the hand, telling you about this guy you just had to meet. And when April called out for Donnie, the poor guy could feel all energy being drained from him. He was over her. He really was. But he still just wasn’t ready to face her. Yet he turned to look at her at the sound of his name, only to be met by your bright eyes and your big smile. Suddenly it seemed much easier to talk while April and Casey was around.

Donnie wouldn’t say that he fell for you straight away. No, he had learned from the first time he fell for a girl. This time he took it more slowly and decided it was best to get to know you first. And with everything he learned about you, he only felt more and more pulled in by you.

You were truly an interesting person in Donnie’s eyes. Like Donnie, you loved learning and gaining knowledge, and you had an interest in the things you didn’t yet fully understand. But while Donnie would poke and prott at whatever he didn’t understand in order to learn, until he knew it all, you would look at it, study it, and learn as it allowed you to. You would wait and never push, using patients as a part of learning. That truly amazed Donnie. But as he was soon to learn, through his own learning through patients, there was more about you to amaze him.

You and Donnie would start to spend more time together as time passed on. At first you would only come down to the lair with April and Casey, but as you and Donnie began to talk more and more, you began to come down on your own, mainly to hang out with Donnie in his lab. And it was in the lab that Donnie learned of your great mind. You understood much of what he was talking about when he presented his projects to you. And when you didn’t understand, you asked him, listening to what he had to say, letting him ramble on for as long as he wanted to. That made a feeling stirrer in Donnie’s stomach. No one would ever let him ramble on about his projects like you did. Sure, April and sometimes even Leo and Mikey would let Donnie talk, but they wouldn’t truly listen. They would just let him talk and let his words pass by them. But you took them in. You remembered the words Donnie spoke, adding it to your own knowledge. That did something to Donnie.

As time went on, Donnie seemed to continuously forget that you were Casey’s cousin. You were so different from him in so many ways. You were curious, you were calm, you were patient, and well, you were smart. Those were not all things that Donnie would describe Casey as. But yet here you were, sometimes even during dinner, engaging Donnie in deep intellectual conversations, sometimes even in front of the rest when seated by the kitchen table.

You was such a caring being. You didn’t just listen to Donnie’s intellectual rambles, but you would also listen to his deeper talks. When he finally started opening up to you emotionally, you would listen respectfully, and hear all his thoughts and worries. His own self view and his self esteem issues. You took it all in, gave him the room to talk, gave him compassion and the emotional support he needed. And as predicted, this only caused the feelings in Donnie’s stomach to grow bigger for you.

Donnie spent months getting to know you, and with each passing day, he found something new to cherish about you. The way you spoke, the way you approached things, and the way you viewed the world and the people around you. To put it simply, Donnie found it beautiful. Just as beautiful as you…

As time went on, it became harder and harder for Donnie to deny the effect you had on him. The growing feeling in his stomach had turned into full blown butterflies, flapping around whenever you were close by. He felt giddy, unable to stop smiling when he saw you, and you in turn seemed just as happy when you saw him. It was a joy to see each other almost everyday, spending more and more time together, bordering on day and night. And as it continued on, Donnie finally admitted it to himself, breathing a sigh of relief when he spoke the words out loud in his empty room, for no one but him to hear. Donatello was crushing on you. Donnie was crushing on Casey’s cousin.

[ghostlysoaps]

Emergency First Aid

He finds Ghost in the bathroom, needle and thread in crimson-stained hands. 

White porcelain muddled with grime and blood, smeared across the cubicle glass. A bottle of something see-through sitting on the lip of the tub – the label near illegible by the fingerprints wrapped around it. Every detail pointing towards it being a scene from some B-list horror flick. Except it can't be. Because Johnny’s nails dig into the palms of his hands and pain has no presence in dreams.

Ghost's skin is almost as pale as the cradle he sits in. Johnny can see the stark blue of his veins through the fragile skin of his wrists. A far more flattering colour on him than red, it's why he pretends he doesn’t know where his favourite henley ended up.

"Get out of my fucking room, Soap."

Johnny nods and then proceeds further into the room, careful to avoid the droplets of blood staining the tiles in a fucked-up breadcrumb trail.

Ghost levels him with an unamused glare, a non-verbal "go away," ringing louder than if he'd said it outright. 

He ignores that too.

The stitching is neither crude nor neat when he leans in for a closer look. Serviceable. Bound to scar. It might have regardless, medical ain't miracle workers, but it might, might have left a thinner mark.

"Soap?"

Ghost's eyes are brown as jasper, doe-wide, extruding exhaustion and warmth – in spite of how much effort he puts into burying that bleeding heart of his. They track Johnny’s progress warily. Glides over him when he wraps his own fingers around the bottle, fingers a good half-inch shorter than the red stains already there. Johnny knows all this despite not looking. Because they've been here before. Too often for his liking. 

He sets about cleaning the tacky trails of blood from Ghost’s skin. 

"Johnny?"

Why are his hands shaking? They're not supposed to do that he doesn't think.

"It's just a scratch, I've had worse."

His tongue unsticks from where it lies dead and heavy in his mouth. "I fuckin' know. 'M not blind."

Warm, calloused hands envelop his own. They stop him from digging deeper welts into his own skin. Massages gently until Johnny, against his will, unclenches and unfolds like a flowering bloom at the first hint of sunlight.

"This won't be what kills me–"

"Haud yer wheesht! Whit this shoddy excuse fer sutures anything's–"

"–because I've no intention of leaving you yet," Ghost– Simon continues, as if Johnny hadn't interrupted him at all. "I've clawed myself back from the edge of hell more times than I care to count." He knocks their heads together, one hand moving to thread fingers though Johnny’s hair. "It's much easier now that I have something to come back to."

Johnny takes a moment to process and sift through the wreckage those words leave behind.

"Take yer damn mask off an' say tha' to my face," he growls.

And Simon doesn't hesitate for a second. He peels the mask off, his second skin, as if it's easier than breathing. As if Johnny’s words were the decree of a higher power he's helpless to obey. Scarred skin and chapped lips and dark circles blending into greasepaint greets him – a sight no longer unfamiliar, but a privilege to behold nonetheless. 

"I-" is as far as Simon comes before Johnny is surging forward to take his bottom lip between his teeth. He kisses him like something feral and starved. As if he could crawl into Simon's mouth if he tried hard enough. Push through muscle, bone and sinew to make space for himself in the hollow of his ribcage.

He doesn't like the anger with which he devours him – the ever-present companion snarling in his chest – but he needs him to understand. Thinks that if he tries hard enough Simon might taste the words lodged firmly behind his molars. I can't stand to lose you. It scares me to the point of losing my breath. I love you. I love you. I love you. 

For all his rage, for all the fiery passion with which he lashes out, in the end it all stems from fear.

"Could've at least gone to medical, ye absolute weapon," he bites out, one hand stressing over the skin right beneath Simon's wound.

"Couldn't stand the thought of anyone touching me," Simon murmurs, catching Johnny’s wrist the moment he goes to pull away as if burnt. "'S better now. I'd have told you to fuck off proper if I didn't–" he cuts himself off, the tips of his ears going pink.

Johnny fills in the blanks, eyes falling shut for the fraction of a second.

"Dinnae deep down wan' me to be here."

Simon shrugs.

Johnny exhales, leans forward and rests his forehead to Simon's shoulder, kisses him sweetly right after.

"Let me help you."

"Please." 

He's glad to be looking at Simon now because Simon, whenever Ghost has fled his visage, is an open book. And the way he's looking at Johnny? It's as if he'd taken every soft, sweet thing Johnny feels for him and is reflecting it right back.

With another steadying breath, Johnny gets to work. Gauze and adhesive tape, as quick as he dares so as to not prolong the pain. And when he's done he brushes his lips over the white bandaging, looking up through his lashes when the simple gesture of affection causes Simon's breath to hitch. Keeps to his knees despite the ache in them.

"You come to me next time," Johnny says, a plea more so than the demand he'd hoped for.

Simon reaches for him, cups his stubbled cheek in hand, thumb rubbing in broad strokes across a near imperceptible scar there – his next words ringing with the gravity of church bells and promises spoken within. 

"Alright, Johnny."

---

Prompts via @whumperless-whump-event and @seth-whumps

[artdcnaldson]

ok ok ok so i have a thought for pats sister au, i mentioned it a while ago cuz someone was talking about something similar

this isnt like that smutty and slutty, but i need them to also just be a little bit happy. and as much as i love love love mean art, i do need him to be a little bit sweet to her now

but im thinking now that he's like fucking her at every chance he gets, that means hes spending a lot of time with her in general. including parties!!!! they start going together instead of just leaving together. not officially or anything because it would undoubtedly get back to pat, so they're just going with a few mutual friends and pretend its a group thing. its also easier for art to pretend like he doesnt just want to be with you and only you. maybe this party is at a sorority instead of a frat, so art lets his guard down a little. there arent as many guys who art knows, meaning even less guys who might happen to know patrick. and hes not too concerned with all the girls considering girl code or whatever.

so he lets himself party more than he usually would, lets himself drink that extra drink (truthfully a few extra) and stand just that bit closer to her (very much closer, practically leaning against her), he even dances with her, something he's never done with a girl. they lean in close when theyre talking, anyone who didnt know them would assume they were a couple, or at least well on their way to becoming one. TIHI!!!

its a pretty rowdy party, art is shocked he thought the frat parties got out of hand but this was wild. before either of them realize it, theyre both wasted, having the time of their lives, but definitely drunk. their friends have started heading home, but they decide to stick around and keep the party going. his arm is around her, hand on her waist slowly but surely wandering down to rest on her ass, accompanied by the occasional squeeze just to make her fidget. hes letting her get close to him. its nothing too suspicious though, no kissing or outright sexual touch, with the right words it could be explained away as friendly, in case patrick should hear about it.

BUT art is drunk, and drunk stanford art is a party boy, i believe this in my heart and core. he is getting reckless, forgetting about patricj and that he's supposed to keep discreet. he is doing shots, hes making her do shots, hes making any- and everyone do shots with him. and im thinking its one of, or both of, 2 things.

hes taking a shot and then spitting into pats sisters mouth

i see this happening like spontaneously, maybe there's only one shot left in the bottle and art has the genius idea that you'll just share it. she doesnt get what he means but he'll just show her. takes the shot, leaves it in this mouth, grabs her jaw and brings her real close to him. she thinks hes going to kiss her, but he pries her mouth open instead, tilts her head back, and spits the shitty liquor right into her mouth. hand tight around her jaw to keep her in place, eyes on hers, just like when he spits in her mouth fr

OR/and later in the evening

2. tequila body shots

this i see happening as just a sudden idea art has. and hes insisting its a great idea, and he'll even let her start so it doesnt seem like hes just trying to get her naked. so he lays on like a sticky, honestly downright nasty, bartop. he takes off his shirt and ugh he just looks so fucking good. pats sister is getting so possessive with all these girls around ogling at her man lol, shes all too eager to mark her territory. so the way weve always done it where i live is tequila poured in the belly button, salt in a line up the chest and lime in their mouth so you have to kiss them to get it. ive learnt from going to international school that thats apparently not universal? let me know about that cuz confusing? how else?

anyway. she takes the shot off of him, taking her time lick up his chest and even longer to get the lime from between his lips. its not like people are really looking at them, but even if they were those two are too drunk to notice or care. when its her turn hes really making a show of it, gets her to take her shirt off, but lets her keep the bra (its practically see-through with all the lace anyway), but he insists that she has to unbutton her jeans because he also wants salt before the shot or whatever. hes making something up, he just wants to see what panties shes wearing and see if he can smell her sweet pussy. he knows she wet, he can tell. hes just as bad as her, if not worse.

then when the party is ending they're definitely going back together, theyre probably too drunk to even try to have sex. just sloppy and stumbling everywhere. they end up passing out in arts bed together, he only just managed to get them both into some of his clothes and decent for bed, boxers for him and just a shirt and panties for her. in the morning they wake up cuddled close. its the first time theyve slept in the same bed, the first time theyve cuddled, its the first time theyve slept in the same room since art first took her virginity. and now they'd spent the night together without having sex at all. it kind of changes things for them... but not too much :)

-🐞

GODDDDD THIS HAS LIVED SOOO RENT FREE. I'm fucking dead it's too beautiful, too perfect. Also body shots are The Same for me as well so ur so valid <3

You're surprised when the invite comes through your phone— when Art asks for you to come with him to a house party hosted by some sorority girl in one of his classes. He heard about it, heard that they can be fun, wants to see you there.

And, god, you pretty yourself up so much for it— a skimpy little tank top that he can see your bra through, a tiny little denim skirt, sweet, sparkly makeup that catches in the fucking strobe lights set up around the living room. You’re nursing a cocktail of pink lemonade and vodka, leaning against his side as he downs another fucking glass of jungle juice. He’s definitely on the wrong side of drunk, or else he wouldn’t be all over you the way he is.

And you’re fucking living for it, the way he keeps one hand slung around your waist, tugs you closer against him so you’re practically one fucking entity. He puts a fucking glowing test tube shot to your lips, eyes lighting up as you eagerly swallow it down. He could spit directly onto your tongue, in front of everyone and you’d fucking let him.

So he does. He downs a tequila shot, grabs your chin and you’re all wide eyed and eager as you look up at him. He spits it into your open mouth and you swallow it down, nose wrinkling at the taste. You like sweet things— fancy champagne, mixed drinks that are mostly juice. But you smile at him once you’ve swallowed down the tequila, giggling and buzzy.

But auuhghghgh body shots :((( he’s such a lecherous little perv, he gets off on the attention from you so bad. Wants everyone to see how bad you want him, how possessive and needy. Sucking the liquor from his naval, tongue flat as you lick up the line of salt you’d carefully tapped up his torso. He watches how your lashes flutter as you lick along his skin, the salt course on your tongue complimenting the sweaty taste of his skin. Maybe you linger there a little longer than what’s comfortable for anyone else watching. You take the lime from his mouth biting down so you can suck the juices from it.

It’s a little clumsy— you’ve never done one before, but you’d practically bouncing on your feet when you ask him to do one from you. He practically drops you on the table, fumbles his way to pulling off your shirt, tosses it somewhere neither of you will ever fucking see again.

He lines up the salt between your tits, in the pretty valley between the pink lace. You squirm when he pours the tequila into your belly button, he watches it slosh and spill as the muscles of your abdomen tremble. You bite your lip as he unbuttons your skirt, tugs it down just until he sees the pretty lacy pink of your panties, a perfect match to your bra.

God, you wanted him to fuck you so bad— you were practically wearing a sign around your neck that said it. He taps out a line of salt, licks from the waistband of your panties up to your naval, and sucks the liquor from it. His tongue laves at you— a long line between your belly button up to the hollow of your throat.

The rest of the party falls away— it’s just you and Art and you’re honestly pretty convinced he’s going to just fuck you on the table— stake his claim, lick into your mouth until all you know is salt and tequila and citrus and spit.

He bites into the lime and you taste the juice as it sprays into his mouth and drips back onto yours.

You hear people, absently, far in the back of your mind. You’re so fucking gone— you’re embarrassing yourselves, both of you. Art tugs his shirt over your head after the mindless, three-second search for your tank top comes back fruitless.

“Wanna go home?” He asks, his breath hot and his words clumsy against the shell of your ear. Home. Yeah, his dorm pretty much is home to you at this point. His hand’s in your back pocket and you’re waving a tipsy goodbye to your friends, clinging onto Art as you start the trek back to the dorms.

He presses you against a tree halfway back, kisses you hot and urgent and needy. Then again in the stairway up to his room— pins you against a set of windows, smiling and laughing against your mouth as some unfortunate soul catches him with his fingers between your thighs.

By the time you get back to his dorm, you’re basically buzzing with need, want, giddiness, affection. Art can’t get hard because he’s so fucked up, ends up giggling about it against your shoulder, mouthing against your salty, sweaty skin with wet, open-mouthed kisses. He collapses into the bed, tugs you against his side and falls asleep with his face buried in your hair and warm, possessive hands on your body.

You’re both asleep in minutes.

[hurtmemoreplease]

As an older bitch it would be sooo fun to hang out with you and your gf. Just normal hangouts, almost mundane. But one day as we are all getting a little tipsy I put my arm around you and say "Let's go into the other room." You and your gf share a confused look. Providing no answers I just tell her "Oh, you stay here." As I guide you away the two of you start to process what I might be doing, but the pressure of me against you and my change in demeanor makes it seem dangerous to say "no." Once the door closes it's too late. Your girlfriend can totally hear us. I'm making no attempt to keep you quiet. It's important that she understands the hierarchy, it will make things easier for all of us.

As time goes on we continue to hang out and have a great time together, only difference is every time I pull one of you away to somewhere more private. It's obvious what is going on. Each time you come back just a little bit disheveled, marks that weren't there before, perhaps cheek still red from where I hit you. No one dare broach the subject though, as I drag you off into bathrooms and hidden corners of a seedy venue.

It's wonderful that we can be friends. Girls like us need to stick together. In this world there are many people that would take advantage of your vulnerability. Good thing I'm here to watch out for you.

God, yeah, I really appreciate it. I'm just a little naive, you know? A little too trusting. I don't know where I'd be without someone like you. I really owe you, big time. Is there anything I can do to help you out? I feel like you're doing so much for me, and I just, don't know how to repay you. The stuff we do in that other room doesn't count, I mean, you're practically doing me a favor with that...

Anyway this is fantastically hot and I think the part that would be most upsetting to my girlfriend is that she doesn't get to watch you beat the shit out of me.

[halcyone-of-the-sea]

i absolutely fell in LOVE with your price fic holy shit. your writing is spectacular. then i read your request info and saw that you love keegan as well and my soul left my body.

So this is me requesting a keegan x reader fic bc i love this underrated man SO much!! maybe some enemies to lovers where one of them gets injured in the field and, thinking they're dying, a teary desperate confession ensues? lol im not good with prompts i just wanna see my man 🤧 thanks in advance i love ur work

(Don't) Go to War

Pairing: Keegan P. Russ x F!Reader

Synopsis: Some days it became impossible not to lose your tempers with each other. Being enemies was easier than admitting you cared.

Word Count: 12.3k

Warnings: Angst, enemies to lovers, blood & gore, vulgar language, fluff & comfort eventually, suggestive (just a tiny bit)

A/N: Just a few more requests to get done, and then my inbox should be open again. I'm thinking I might do an independent Gaz fic too...but idk yet. Enjoy, Love!

*I do not give others permission to translate and/or re-publish my works on this or any other platform*

Some days it became impossible not to yell at him.

“I had the shot, Keegan!” Your voice carries over the hull of C-23 Sherpa, and you didn’t bother to stay strapped into your seat as the aircraft levels out around you. Thrusting your body up, your feet slam to the floor as you stalk over to the silent man who watches you with burning blue eyes, “If you hadn’t gotten in the way the target would be six feet under by now!” 

Your face was twisted with rage, and a need for justice laced your brain like an inextinguishable blaze of fire. 

Keegan and you had a violent streak of not getting along - to the point where Elias was close to separating the two of you permanently. It wasn’t entirely your fault, the man just got on your nerves when he acted like he could boss you around. No Man’s Land was your playground; you knew the trails, where to take shelter when needed, and what towns and backroads to avoid because of Federation occupation. You spent most of your time beyond the walls of Fort Santa Monica just like Keegan and the other Ghosts did – he had no right to lecture you out here. 

He had no right to fuck up the mission.

“Kid,” The man in question warns, his form tense from where it leans against the wall. Around the two of you, the aircraft shakes from turbulence. Keegan’s eyes narrowed to slits, and behind the cloth over his face you see his lips thin dangerously, “I’d be careful what you say next.” 

“Oh, shut the hell up!” You growl. The dirt and blood sticking to your skin makes you want to scratch at yourself with blunt nails; rip away the grime. Stomping up to Keegan you stand directly in front of him, a sneer heavy on your lips. Your body is shaking with adrenaline, “You have no right to tell me that. I worked my ass off getting that intel on Vidal Teo for months just for you to mess up my shot in no less than three seconds. What the fuck?!” 

Keegan’s dead eyes glare from behind the stain of his black eye paint, the custom balaclava shifting as his hidden face moves. Over his arms, his fingers tense and tighten; a pulsing atmosphere begins to perforate the hull. The already strained rope was snapping.

Vidal Teo was a high-ranking commander for the Federation soldiers stationed in a large portion of No Man’s Land. He was instrumental in leading the frontal assault on the Fort – which had been getting steadily worse as the years went on. Vidal was a man marked for death, and your bullet had his name carved into the silver grooves. 

He was yours. 

“I don’t like your tone, Princess,” Keegan hisses down at you, but his intimidation tactics don’t work. He was large, sure, with a gargantuan build that made your shoulders square, but the anger in your blood pumped with vengeance, “I’m in command of the mission, don’t go mixing it around. You listen to me.”

“Not when Teo was right fucking in front of me,” Your head whips to the side, hands clenched as you point a single finger into the man’s chest. The two of you were so close you could feel his gear brush against yours when he breathed. Inside your form, your pulse sings, “If you hadn't fired that shot all of this would have been finished. Now,” You lower your voice as his enraged eyes bore into you, “He’s off in the damn wind. We’ll never get an opportunity like that again.” 

“Back up.” Keegan stands straighter, arms falling to his sides, and at that moment a sliver of hesitance makes its way into your heart as his shadow looms over you, “Now. Before you do something you’ll regret.”

Clenching your jaw, your finger falls. No matter how pissed off you were at the Ghost, one thing he said was right. Keegan was in control of this mission – technically he was your superior at the moment. You should listen to him. 

Listen? Your eyes flash, Like he listened to me? I told him to not fire while I lined my scope up…Why the hell did he do that?

“The sooner you’re out of my life,” Growling, you stare deep into Keegan’s eyes and only slightly shiver at the intensity. You could feel his breath coming out in strained puffs, wafting over your face, “The better. This is on you…All of my goddamn work down the drain…” 

Jerking back as you grumble the last sentence under your breath, you storm past the Ghost’s stone-still figure and enter the cockpit, feeling his locked gaze on you the entire time. You slam the door shut, only serving to make the pilots snap their attention to you, mouths slack and optics wide.

“What?” You growl, glaring and practically releasing steam out of your ears. Damn that man and his stupidly handsome face…What?

The pilots quickly stutter back to their controls, backs straight, and heads forward. 

Blinking, you scrunch your lips; your sense coming back to you as your shoulders deflate. 

“Fuck,” Grumbling, you bring your hands up and place them on top of your head, lacing the fingers together as your elbows stick out. You glance remorsefully at the two stiff profiles, “Sorry, boys. Long day.” 

Elias was going to lecture you again. 

He always did when you and Keegan got into fights – they were becoming more and more recent in the past few months. From common disagreements about misplaced knives or weapons to full-blown yelling matches over accidents on missions, the recurring bouts of thrown words never seemed to end. 

You were so incredibly sick of it. 

Why were you always fighting with him? Why did every action strike you in the heart like a blade? You were always tense around Keegan, sending sharp glances at him every time he was in the vicinity and sharper words a second later. He did the same in return, it wasn’t like this was one-sided. The man was determined to push every button in the book, and damn it if you didn’t do that as well. 

Keegan was a man on a high horse; arrogant, hard-headed, rude, and held authority like a stick you could beat someone over the head with. He demanded utter perfection. 

Sighing violently, you lean back against the door and shove your palms into your eye sockets; head tilting back to rest on the cool metal and soothe the growing headache.

The problem was, most of the time the man was right when he told you something – whether work-related or not. 

“Tango to the left – weapons hot.”

“Contact Scarecrow, Exfil in five. We have a group just above the pharmacy building.”

“West, Kid. Snipers scope, take ‘em down.”

No Man’s Land was supposed to be your playground and all of a sudden some other kid comes along; starts throwing rocks at the equipment with a damn painted balaclava over his face. You didn’t want someone telling you how to do your job. 

Frowning, your teeth nash in annoyance. 

This flight back to Santa Monica couldn't end soon enough, and now you had months of Recon intel sitting in your office to throw into the trash.

—

You grabbed at the pinned-up files with paper-cut fingertips, looking over the contents before frowning. Tossing them to the side, your ears twitch at the flopping sound of them flying into the garbage bin at your feet. 

The bulletin board was bare of all the red yarn, maps, and intel that you had once hung up with pride. Vidal Teo was gone, and just so the board was once more empty. It was hard not to feel cheated, angry, but maybe a part of you felt emptiness as well. 

All of that work… just for one shot to mess it up. And the bullet wasn’t even from your own gun. 

“I swear,” You whisper, itching at your nose, “If I ever get up on a team with him again…” 

Trailing off, your legs shift and carry you to your desk where you throw yourself down into the chair. Thoughts of Keegan made your brain race, mind going to try and understand why. Even if you didn’t like the man, at least on the surface, you still respected him. 

So, why? None of it made sense. Why fire off into the city at an unidentified target and send Teo rushing for cover? Why not explain to you what had happened when you were back on the plane? If he had made a mistake and admitted that, you would have accepted it… eventually, of course, but you still would have accepted it regardless. You would have had to.

Licking your lips, you tap your knuckles onto the metal of your desk, playing a long-forgotten tune. You never heard the door open.

“Heard the Op didn’t go as planned, but at least the two of you didn’t kill each other. I’d have a helluva a lot of paperwork to do if you put a bullet in his ass,” Sitting up straighter your head snaps to the open doorway, seeing the stocky stature of Thomas Merrick with his arms crossed over his chest, “Still, though, heard ya’ nearly made those pilots piss their pants when you yelled at ‘em.”

“Merrick,” You groan out, tipping your head past the chair’s backing, your neck digging into the wood, “You’re acting like I try to be a bitch.” 

“Are you not,” When you glare at him, the man’s dark eyebrow raises slightly, “Because you’re failing at it – often. Elias’s at the end of his rope with you two.”

Grumbling, your nose scrunches, lips pulling back in a small snarl. 

“It’s not my fault. Keegan hates me just the same.” 

“That any excuse to yell at a superior?” Merrick sighs, shaking his bald head and walking forward, “Thought I trained you better than that?” 

Your eyes flicker to his own, but seeing the blatant disappointment in them, you find it better to look at the empty bulletin board. Swallowing stiffly, your feet shuffle on the floor. 

“Look at all my work, Thomas,” Shoving yourself to your feet, you walk to the small garbage bin and pick it up; holding it aloft, you watch the Ghost’s Field Officer's lips thin. There was a mass amount of wasted paper, pictures, and yarn that caught his eye. You go and slam it onto your desk, hearing the clatter as the pencil holder falls to its side, “Wasted. Because of one man’s actions – how many people are going to die now because I couldn’t make the shot? Ten, twenty, thirty…?” 

“Kid–” Merrick begins, but you cut him off – still angry at Keegan and trying to strangle down the guilt of pushing it onto Thomas.

“If you don’t mind, Merrick, I have a shit-ton of reports to sign and no time to do them,” Once more flopping back into your chair, you rub your hands over your face and feel the skin pull. If you were anyone other than yourself, you would be getting a reprimand for interrupting a superior like that but Merrick was something of a friend to you. 

Closing your eyes, you let the darkness behind your lids flood you as you take a deep breath. 

The Ghost leaves after a moment without noise or a sound of encouragement, but that was just how he was. You feel his dark eyes on you, lingering, before he closes the door behind him and stalks away. 

Finally left alone in silence, you let your thoughts run to try and answer the age-old question that ravaged your mind.

“What happened to make us like this?” You whisper, hands falling to your lap as you stare off into the distance with blank eyes. 

You had never given it much thought – sometimes people just didn’t like each other. Ingrained enemies written into the annals of time and cursed to forever be at each other's throats like rabid animals. But then you realized that this wasn’t high school and you were an adult living in a fucked up world full of death and war. Coworkers no longer had the privilege to talk shit about the other behind their backs or not communicate their problems; being out in No Man’s Land forced people to compromise and work together like a well-oiled machine. 

And well-oiled was not the way to describe yours and Keegan's relationship…more like a run-down and rusty car that screams every time you turn the key; practically begging someone to put it out of its misery. 

Blinking, you realize, perhaps for the first time, how much of a problem this predicament with Keegan really was. 

This could kill us both.

All of this began, you knew, a long time back, and, as it usually did, it had started out beyond the Fort before bleeding back into the ramshackle place you called home. The both of you were enemies far longer than you had been friends.

Your body was hot, sweat dripping down your temple and slipping the expanse of your chin, but still, you stood outside Elias Walker’s door with a tense jaw; fingers itching to rip into Keegan’s flesh. They were speaking inside, their voices hushed as your boots pooled mud and dirt onto the floor like a brand. 

“She…went over the ridge?” Elias asks, voice deep, “And she’s alive?”

“Hm,” Keegan makes a savage noise in the back of his throat, and you have to hide your panting breaths to hear it. The damn bastard was always so silent any sound would perk your ears, even if they were ringing with reverberations of spent bullets.

“Then I don’t exactly see what the problem is, Keegan.”

A pause.

“...She’s impulsive. Combative. Doesn’t listen,” There was an inhaled breath, and you feel your face burn at the profound gravel-toned words, lungs making your chest tighten as they zip closed as a bag would. But those next comments make you growl in the back of your throat, rage like fire in your heart, “I don’t want her. Kid’ll get the people she’s placed with killed if she’s allowed to do that again!”

A sigh through the shocked silence. 

“Then what do you suggest I do? She’s a valuable asset, I can’t just ground her – the Recon work she does is vital to finding Federation strongholds.”

“I don’t care what you do with her, Elias. Just keep her far away from me and the boys. Kid’s not my problem. Never want her to be again.”

Whatever harsh words are uttered next are lost to you, because your legs are already carrying you down the corridor with brimming tears stuck in the corners of your eyes. 

It was more the way he said it than the contents of the clipped sentences. Like you were less than him, pathetic, and unworthy. Nothing more than a rookie holding a gun and parading off into the wilderness to have a good time. That was what wrecked you.

The next time you saw Keegan it was only narrowed glances and clenched fists; terse words. When you snapped at him for the first time, you swear his eyes slightly widened, cold blue one second then boiling bright the next.

You liked that look on him – shocked into a different type of silence. A type of anger you could meet head-on.

Fighting with Keegan soon became too addicting to ignore, a constant activity that never changed like the destroyed world always did. A failsafe at the end of the day. 

 The anger had never dimmed, infecting you like a poisoned worm stuck in your veins and weaseling its way to your heart. It had only grown the longer you let it sit, and at the end of the day, you festered over the image of the Ghost’s face with his eyes digging into your skin. You stayed awake at night mulling over the arguments, taking the insults and words like bullet wounds to your heart with barely restrained tears; feeling guilty because you threw some back as well. 

But what hurt you the most was that, before the hushed meeting in Elias’s office, you had looked up to him. To Keegan. Perhaps you had even enjoyed his quiet company at one point when the loneliness of No Man’s Land got to you. The terrain was incredibly quiet in between the violent hails of gunfire and, on occasion, it would make paranoia infect your bones like a cancer; producing shaking limbs and tense fingers. When Keegan was with you…you hated to admit this, but he made the silence better. More survivable compared to when you were alone doing Recon with only a gun and a combat knife as deadly companions. 

Your narrowed lids flicker to the trash bin on the desk. 

There was still a small pinch of anger – resentment for the waste and for words spoken in haste – but your mind pulsed to find an explanation. A reason. 

There must be a reason that Keegan would fire off a shot into the city prematurely…obviously it was to hit a target, but why? And why hadn’t he told you the reason? 

I’m gonna rip my head apart if I keep thinking this over, You warn yourself, huffing under your breath. 

You had reports to write up – tell of your failure to kill Vidal Teo and how many lives that will ultimately cost in the future. While you were stuck with a pen in your hand, scribbling away even as the sun had set outside, you had no idea of the stare-down going on in Elias’s office one floor up.

—

Elias’s eyes are sharp, a wave of dark anger deep in the iris as he stands with his arms crossed behind his desk, “Why’d you fire?”

Keegan's feet are shoulder length apart and his arms are clenched behind his back, spine straight; a deep tension lives in the thick air, bearing down weight on the men. The Ghost was still in his gear, the balaclava and black face paint in all its glory situated over his head. That was his best form of armor, allowing him to hide the deep sneer over his cruelly scared lips. 

“Tango. Off in the next building,” Keegan’s voice was low, harsh, and cut to a point. He didn’t want to be there – there were many more important things to be done than getting a lecture like a five-year-old. 

His sniper rifle needed cleaning, rookies needed to be disciplined, and the treadmills were calling his name. He had to work off all the bullshit in his head.

“The Girl had the shot. Vidal Teo needed to die, Russ – she knew that well enough. I want an explanation as to why a high-priority target is still up and walking.” 

The silent beast of a man keeps his body still, even if his head is pounding. Hot adrenaline was still in his veins from how you were yelling at him in the Sherpa, the memory of your rage-twisted face burning into the back of his eyes. He had never seen you that angry before; shaking with the need to release your displeasure onto him. It had slightly taken him aback. 

Fighting with you was predictable. You’d both throw insults, get into each other's faces and cruelly break down each other's psyche piece by piece – the man knew what to say and where the unspoken line was just as you did. Fighting was easier than admitting there was something deeper going on, something that you two were hesitant to even speak of. 

But, hell, you had never gotten that upset at him previously. And, problem was, even if he wanted to deny it, Keegan knew he fucked up. Bad. 

There wasn’t a way in hell that he was going to tell you that, though. He wasn’t going to tell you that his finger had moved before his mind could, pulling down on the hair-trigger of his prized rifle like a fucking novice. Even now self-resentment was worming into him.

He had never felt that to this degree before. He didn’t like it – couldn’t afford to acknowledge it.

What gave you the right to provoke those emotions from him? Maybe I need to ask to have her transferred. Brat’s messin’ with my head.

“Miscalculation. Won’t happen again.” His feet shuffle, boots shifting silently over the floor like that of his title. Miscalculation – he doesn’t make those. Never had after ODIN hit the US. There wasn’t any room for them. 

Keegan was a master of taking lives with a swift movement and a pull of a trigger; no one had ever known him to be reckless. 

They had you for that.

Elias narrowed his eyes, head tilting, as a tightness is seen rippling through his jaw, “You’re going to have to lie better than that, Son.”

Keegan stilled, dead eyes boring into the other man’s. The sharp blue deepens, darkens. His shoulders set themselves, but the ingrained looseness is still there if someone looks close enough and spies it. Instinct is hard to fight. 

“Elias?” He asks from behind the fabric of his face covering but utters no more. 

Keegan was a man of few words – very few. Actions served him better, but in this room, there was no point to them. Walker was his superior; his Captain, but more so the closest thing to a brother Keegan would ever have. There wasn’t a choice in this, even if the men had gone through hell together as Ghosts. 

“Don’t play me for a fool, Keegan,” The graying man mutters out, shaking his head and going to rest his hands on the top of his desk, “I’ve known you a long time. You don’t fuck up something like this. Never have. So don’t insult me with that half-assed answer.” 

Elias pauses, sighing when Keegan just stares at him with blank, black-laced, hard eyes. The man was a damn empty slate, never moving, never giving away anything to betray his emotions.  

“I want a full report on my desk in a week. I’m sure the Kid’ll have hers done in a day, but I want you to explain yourself. In detail. You hear?”

“Copy.” 

“Dismissed.”

Keegan turns and leaves without another word, just a burning in his gut and a righteous sense of surety in his bloodstream. Your face slashes over his vision as he exits the room, he closes the door behind him and thumps down the halls. People move out of his way quickly, sending glances with pupils so tiny they practically disappear altogether; Keegan knew he was intimidating, especially with all his gear and smelling like gunpowder and blood. Didn’t bother him much. 

It seemed like it didn’t bother you either, judging by how you were in his face screaming all the time. 

Damn brat, Keegan thinks, itching at his nose bridge and sending stiff glances at the rows and rows of closed doors and windows, She doesn’t know anything.

Before long his feet had carried him down corners and hallways as his head pounded, and it wasn’t a surprise that when he shook himself out of his trance the entire make-up of the floors and walls had changed. 

Wait…where was he? 

His pace slows to a stop, and his eyebrows furrow in confusion. Where had he ended up while his mind was running at the thought of you? This had never happened before – the Ghost’s head was all out of sorts if he was talking walks around the Fort without a destination. Every action of his had a purpose, why was that now becoming anything less than fact? 

Annoyance plagued him.

Sliding his eyes around, a certain office window catches his viper-like attention. It was the only one with a light still on, warm rays shining out into the hallway, and the shuffling of paper and manila folders flowing to his ears. The door was only minutely ajar, a sliver, and nothing more. About to turn around and leave the area, Keegan halts at the sound of a familiar voice grumbling. His heart jerks.

Blue eyes narrow, and that annoyance at himself grows to find an external outlet.

The hell is this Kid doin’ up so late? Doesn’t she know when lights out is? Fuck, looks like she can’t follow simple guidelines either.

With shuffling feet, he takes a step forward and has every intention to bust down the door and force you to the barracks; lecturing you on the importance of rest when he suddenly realizes something.

Why does he care if you get a good night's sleep? 

Growling under his breath, he happens to get a glimpse of a moving shadow through the window that gives him pause with one gloved hand on the woodgrain of the door. If possible, he feels his body completely stop at the scene; his eyes flickering into a widened look. 

And what was that tightening in his chest?

You were staring at the hung-up bulletin board, having dragged your desk chair over and situated it right in front of the bare rectangle that once held an innumerable amount of papers and information. 

Keegan had seen it himself right before the mission had started. Your eyes lit up when you could tell him everything you knew about the target from his schedule to what he ate in the mornings.

Eggs with a protein bar. Two cups of milk.

You had gathered all of that info yourself – countless trips into Federation-occupied territory that left you coming back with bruises and deep lacerations. Keegan knew; he had watched you limping back through the gate with a shielded look in his eyes. But now the board was blank and useless, holding nothing but your knowledge that it was once filled with your labors. 

The Ghost’s hand on the door loosens, and he takes a slow inhalation of breath as your tired eyes get glossy. When had you gotten those bags under your eyes? Keegan’s lips pull thin behind his balaclava. Had…had you always looked that tired? 

Had you both really been fighting so much that he had stopped noticing the most basic parts of you that he had watched so closely before?

“I had it…” Keegan’s shoulders tense when he hears you speak, but he doesn’t move. A needle of guilt moved to dig deeper. Your hopeless sigh leaves him gritting his teeth, “Fuck.” 

Digging your palms into your eyes, he watches you shake, limbs tense and hunched over nearly into a ball. He has the sudden urge to push the door open, not to scold you but to simply stand by your side. Tell you the truth. 

Keegan’s eyebrows pull together, gaze flicking away from you so his brain can focus. But it was like a magnet was stuck behind his optics because it wasn’t long before his eyes flowed back to the small figure. 

He stays there for a good while, watching, with a weighted chest and pounding heart. Keegan couldn’t really say what he was thinking about, but all of it certainly involved you. So why couldn’t he open the door?

When your head jerks back up, his eyes widen, body swiftly moving back. 

By the time you look out the office window, his shadow is already disappearing down the hallway. 

—

You nearly lose your cool when Elias tells you Keegan was accompanying you out into No Man’s Land once more. The bags under your eyes burned – weeks had passed since the fight, and you had gotten little sleep since then. 

“Teo was sighted by one of the drones near an abandoned warehouse on the outskirts of San Francisco. I want you and Keegan on the trail, and, hopefully,” Elias mutters as Merrick and Ajax listen in the background. Your apparent partner stands behind you, leaning back on the wall with his arms crossed, “We can put this to rest.”

Standing rail-straight, your face is twisted but you keep yourself under control. Even being in the same room with Keegan made you want to lash out. At your sides, your hands slowly clench into tight fists, and behind you, a sharp gaze digs its claws into your skull.

He’s watching you. Studying like he always does when he thinks you don’t notice. 

“Sir,” You answer the older Ghosts blankly, lips stiff, “If you think that’s best.” 

“I do,” Merrick raises a brow behind Elias, and you pretend not to notice as Ajax’s shoulders shake, “That going to be a problem?”

Ironically, Keegan and you both answer at the same time, a strangling silence before a snarled, “No, Sir.” 

The pair of you shipped out in thirty minutes, but neither of you bothered to look at the other as you gathered supplies in the armory; grabbing magazine after magazine and strapping knives to thighs, arms padded with thick clothes and heavy black combat vests. Keegan was applying his face paint despite the dark color already stained into his eye sockets. You doubted it could come off anymore – the skin was probably so damaged by the chemicals it was pointless to try. Like some brutal birthmark. He slipped the balaclava over soon after.

The fabric covered the dark hair and strong jaw, slightly marred with stubble – long scars that grew harsher when his skin twisted; the angled lips below a sharp nose that had captured your attention the first time you had seen them. Keegan was undoubtedly handsome, carved from stone and silver – the remnants of that artistry only now glimpsed in his eyes as a cold reminder. It was funny, you thought, that someone so beautiful could be such an ass. You watched him, terse-like, and grabbed a revolver hanging from the rack, shoving it into your thigh holster. 

He was acting off. 

Keegan was more silent than he usually was; at this point, he would at least make a quick quip about your annoying habit of packing extra ration bars in your front pouch. 

‘Gonna weigh you down, Kid, if you stuff one more of those damn things into your vest.’

But the more you sneaked glances, the more your feet started to shuffle in unease. The Ghost wouldn’t even look at you. 

“You sick or something?” Your voice carries, echoing off the walls as you tighten the vest strap on your side. You had never bothered to be subtle when talking to the man – he appreciated bluntness, and that was one thing you could get behind. 

“No,” Keegan slips past, suddenly colder than ever before, and disappears without another word. 

Watching his back shift as he strides off, your eyebrows furrowed in confusion and perhaps a bit of shock. 

What the hell was that? You ask yourself, hands falling to your sides where they twitch. Keegan was damn confusing, but he had never been outright numb like that to you besides when you both first met. Your resentment flares in your breast, but with a shake of your head, you force it down. That wouldn’t help anyone, and you still wanted answers. 

If this was how Keegan wanted to be then fine, you’d just have to ask Elias for his report when you got back and figure out for yourself why he had ruined the previous mission. 

You grabbed a canteen of water and shuffled out the door, flicking off the light with a heavy finger and followed after the Ghost’s footsteps; dreading the Op but feeling your pulse beat at the thought of nabbing Teo once and for all. 

This was ending. Today. 

—

The aircraft landed just far enough away to be unseen by Federation soldiers and on the line of being annoyingly distant from the target. The hike would be through mountainous terrain – the land ravaged by the remnants of ODIN’s destruction and just beginning to heal. On top of steep cliffs, and sharp rocks, there would also be rampaging streams and thick foliage. Speaking from experience, you knew it was going to be a sweat-inducing mission…and that was before you got to the main point of it all. 

Both of you disappear into the treeline after the pilot tells you the future Evac Point, hoofing it at a jog into the shadows and blending in like animals. Under your feet, the leaves crush, telling stories of where you placed your weight as the packs over your body jump with every jerk forward. Keegan takes the lead, silently expecting you to follow as your eyes stare into his back. 

He still hadn’t talked to you. It made your skin crawl.

Watching his gait, you frown and clench your jaw. Why did it bother you so much? Wasn’t this what you wanted all along…for him to leave you alone? 

Sighing, you hop over a downed log, seeing Keegan quickly send a look behind him at your form before snapping his head forward. 

“There’s an old structure west of the Warehouse – a hunting lodge still standing from before ODIN was fired, I found it on one of my other Ops,” You call, moving faster to run side-by-side with the man. Dodging a tree, your tongue runs over your lips, “We should set up there – we’d have a clear shot.”

For a moment there was only the sound of shoved foliage, steady breaths, and clinking gear before Keegan replies. 

“Affirm.” 

He pulls ahead, and you’re left widely watching his shoulders, seeing the muscles under his attire ripple as they propel him faster away. Your eyelids narrow, a thin sneer flickering over your lips.

Keep your cool, You follow after, careful where you place your feet as the ground begins to ascend, If I get him in a good mood, maybe he’ll answer my questions later. 

It was easier said than done, of course, and although your efforts were valiant, none of your plans to get him to speak to you landed. The hike ended with panted breaths and a setting sun, mist seeping like snakes over the rocks under your feet; the world was quiet, and try as you might you found a deep sense of loneliness in that. The pair of you were on top of a ridge, surrounded by deep green and gray. No birds sang, and no animals trampled the land – it was just the harsh wind and the creak of stretching metal from far ahead. The occasional smell of dirt that left your nose full of particles and led to coughing fits.

Perhaps Keegan had the right idea for a face covering, even if it was never intended for the reason of keeping the elements out.

The Warehouse was near a crater, one of the places ODIN had struck directly into the Earth, and teetered on the edge of oblivion as it was half-falling apart and drenched in red rust. Occasionally, as a tremor rolled through, pieces of it would fall off and slam to the ground a million miles away, deep into the crust of what was left. 

Definitely a place for a safe house. No one would bother to look here unless you already knew about it or were hiding something.

Thinking to yourself, you rub the sweat off your nose with the back of your hand, eyes flickering to the hole in the Earth with shielded disgust. It had been over ten years, but the horror was still there. All of those innocent people… 

“Here,” The smooth voice startles you, but your attention diverts quickly to the man at your side. His hands hold out a red cloth in his first and second fingers and pointedly avoids sneaking a peak at your shocked expression. Your mouth opens and closes, optics bouncing back and forth between the gift and the strange Ghost. 

You could hear a pin drop if you had one to throw.

“The fuck are you doing?” 

“Your stench is going to alert the guards – wipe yourself off. I need to repeat myself, Princess?” With an unamused face, you snatch the textile and rub it over your heated skin, reveling in the dismissal of layers of salt. 

“Asshole,” You mutter, “You better not have used this before me; if I get acne I’m shaving your head in your sleep and siccing Riley on you.” 

“Sounds fun. Better make sure I’m dead by the end of it.”

“Trust me, I will. I’ll make sure to chuck your body from the Fort wall, too,” Sliding past him, you toss the cloth at his chest, “Hunting lodge is this way.” 

You get so close your shoulders lightly brush, and although you hate the implications, the action leaves your chest tight as you inhale his scent of blood and shrill chemicals. Clenching your jaw, you don’t take in the way his warmth floods your veins or the cold gaze that follows your back as you walk away; briefly softening around the edges like a blunt blade before being sharpened once more under stone and rock.

Hearing his feet lightly caress the ground behind you, you let out a slow breath, shoving away a branch of a low tree and peeping back. Keegan's gaze locks on your own as if he was waiting for this, and you curse not being able to see his expression – but it wasn’t like that would give away anything either. The Ghost was blank, much like the bulletin board had been when you ripped your work from it.

Raising a dark brow, the man grunts under his breath in question as his large shadow leeks over your form. 

“Nothin,’” You mutter and turn back, fixing the strap of your rifle and side step a piece of cut wood, looking like it was the remains of a windowsill that had been broken during the shockwave and flung from a house, “Thanks for the rag. Even if it did smell like Gun Oil.”

Blinking down at the forgotten object, your arms push through one more set of fauna and huff when you lay eyes on the run-down lodge that would be Base Camp. Rushing up the decaying steps, you push the paint-peeing door open and throw your hands out.

“And here we are,” Walking with acute familiarity into the one-room area, “Home sweet home,” You nod your head to the left, where a large window gives a clear view of the Warehouse down below, “We’ll take the shot from over there, but…here…where did I…?” 

Stumbling to a stop, you take one step back and ignore the narrowed eyes on your back.

“The hell you looking for, Kid?” 

“Shh,” You snap your fingers at a loose board near a broken-down TV stand, “There we go!” Jogging over, you place your foot on one end of the board and grab the now-propped-up opposite side with a heavy hand. Like a teeter-totter. 

Tossing the wood away, you grab the stash you had hidden years ago and hold it aloft near your head as you turn around.

Keegan watches with small eyes, head tilted, and feeling a bit curious about where this was going. What were you holding in your hand…? Was that…?

“Chocolate bars? I thought those were under strict ration laws?” His booted feet carry him closer to you and the plastic bag holding three bars of the old treat, “Damn, Kid.” 

The man didn’t ask how you knew they were there – at least, yet – but he had an idea. You had logged more hours outside than anyone else besides the Ghosts, and with your affinity to keep to your own, it was only common sense that you had stashes all over California.

“Special occasion,” You mutter, opening the bag and tossing him one. Of course, he catches it, flipping it over in his hands and rubbing a thumb over the wrapper. Keegan’s eyes filter back to yours slowly, and under him, his feet shuffle to shift his weight. 

“Y’know these things are probably older than Fort Santa Monica, right? It’ll give you gut rot.”

“God, I hope so,” You rip the wrapper open and snap off a piece as you hear crinkling from the other bar being opened; you toss yours into your mouth and smirk, “Maybe Ajax’ll finally lend me his alcohol stash to help me out for once. Bastard keeps making excuses.”

The bar was a bit stale if you were being honest, but it was still chocolate in your books. Stuffing the rest of it in your side pocket, you slip the rifle from around your back and head to the window, with the butt of the gun you raise it up and bring it down. A corner of the glass shatters into a million pieces, falling to the ground outside like tiny stars and reflecting the dying light. 

Far below, miles away, the Warehouse seems dead to the world, but your and Keegan’s trained eyes spy the microscopic shadows in the rust-strangled metal walls, slipping past like rats over the holes and windows. 

“Visual?” The man next to you asks, pulling back down his balaclava, and your ears twitch as you gaze through your scope; watching with perfected focus. Pulling back with a grunt, you flip the gun and rest the barrel against the wall, sighing.

“Negative. There won’t be until the sun sets fully,” Keegan turns to look down at you, and the fabric around his mouth shifts into a frown. You raise a brow and explain, not needing him to ask his question, “I‘ve tracked this guy like a teenager on the internet who has a crush. I know his routine. When the sun sets he checks the perimeter with two of his guards, Fabián Julieta and Santos Rosa – I have reason to believe they’re his cousins, but it’s never been confirmed.”

“You sure he’ll do that?” Keegan scoffs, looking back out and tapping his fingers over his thigh holster, “There was just an attempt on his life. Not exactly the time to follow procedure.”

“Well, I suppose I’ll have to leave it to fate. Plus,” You can’t help but mutter, “We wouldn’t have been in this situation if you hadn’t messed up.”

The air thickens.

Keegan’s body stills, frozen like his bones had just been covered in frost and doused in frigid waters. Out of the corner of your eye, you watch with bated breath. But he notices the trap, it seems, because his neck never enters the snare laid out. The tension that had lived over you both like a dark cloud suddenly gained lighting, quick flashes of light over the sky.

“It’ll be too dark by then,” Is his only response – even if it’s clipped and growled out like a man ready to snap. He wanted to start an argument, you could tell with growing amusement. Keegan’s arms clench at his sides into shaking fists.

“Then it’s a good thing Ghosts can see in the dark,” You smirk, tilting your head to the side and beginning to reach for the rest of the chocolate bar resting in your pocket, “Isn’t that right? Make sure not to freak out and fire at the birds–!” 

The hand latches onto your shoulder before you can process the man had even moved; eyes widening to the size of plates as the pressure snaps your body to face forward. You let out a light yip as your feet drag. Despite the hold being firm, Keegan’s fingers never dig too tight.

Your eyes level on his, gazing deep into his boiling blues that shimmer the longer you stare. Had the middle always had flecks of green? Inside your chest, your heart pounds like a drum as, behind the balaclava, his jaw clenches. Keegan’s breath is like a breeze over your hair, rustling it. 

“Don’t…do that,” He says slowly. You just watch, wide-eyed, “Don’t speak on shit you have no idea about.” 

Whatever had made your lungs constrict fled in an instant.

“What?” Your lips twist, “You mind telling me how I’d have ‘no idea’ about an Op I was supposed to come back with a confirmation of death on?” 

You shove his arm off your shoulder and hate the way the chill of the air overtakes his warmth. 

Keegan’s shoulders set, “Kid, I’m ordering you to–”

“Cut the shit!” You yell, finger going to shove into his face and watching his head whip to it before wafting back to your visage. If possible his shoulders widen even farther, legs tense and straight. This was it – your confusion would go no further, you decided, “You’re going to explain all of this, Keegan–!” 

“Watch the damn volume–”

“Explain why I’m out here, why you messed up the mission–!”

“Listen to me. I need you to–”

“Why my fucking work was all wasted because you pulled the damn trigger and I’m reaping the consequences like an idiot with a guy who hates my guts–!”

“There was a sniper on the roof.”

Your rampage stops just as you were about to open your mouth once more. You stare at him at the bombshell, not even able to process it for a moment. Blinking, you realize you had moved Keegan backward so his back was pressed into the opposite wall; your body was pressed tightly up next to his. With every fast breath, you could feel your chest connect with his, and your finger was still against his peck, digging into the gear. 

Sucking in a quick breath, you gathered what little courage you had gained and looked up into his face with a fire lit in your blood. 

“...W-what?” Keegan’s body shifts and his arms go to grab your elbows. 

He doesn’t move you, just gives them a firm squeeze and explains as his heart pounds in his chest. Under the cloth, his mouth is slightly parted, and his pupils are wide.

“Federation sniper,” He utters, blinking as your face goes void of emotion, “I didn’t know if he’d seen you yet, but I…” 

The Ghost trails off as his thigh brushes yours, all of the pouches uncomfortable to feel digging into his skin, but worth it if he can make this right.

“Why…Why didn’t you tell me?” You whisper out, the skin of your eyebrows moving to press the tiny hairs closer together. This changed everything, “Why did you…?”

Keegan’s face is so close to yours that he can smell your shampoo through the dark fabric over his nose, suddenly suffocating on the comfort the covering usually brought him. Why was his heart racing in his chest? You were being irresponsible, yelling like that, and stubborn, hard-headed. 

But, damn, if anger wasn’t a good look on you. Your body heat was leaking into him, making him swallow heavily.

“Because…knew you’d blame yourself,” He said simply, staring at you deeply as your expression softens just as Keegan’s body does against the wall; you lean in deeper to his hold, “Just didn’t expect you to take it all so hard.”

“What? You just wanted me to let it go?” You utter, feeling and finally admitting how addicting it felt to be this close to him. For the life of you, you can’t find it in yourself to look away from him. What was happening?

“Again, didn’t know you’d take it so hard,” He raises a brow, grip falling from your elbows to lightly grab your hips. You force down a shiver, veins alight with molten lava at the strange contact. The Ghost continues, “Where’d you get the idea I hated you?”

Your throat swallows down saliva, not understanding the feeling in your gut. 

Shit, You think, Maybe that chocolate was bad – my head’s spinning…All I can smell is Keegan. But why am I not trying to leave?

Just a moment ago you were angry at him, but now everything made sense. A sniper, God, he could have just told you. It would have fixed a lot of things.

You mull over his question; do you answer it honestly? But for some odd reason, your mouth runs faster than your mind – it always had, and certainly always would. At least around Keegan, that is.

A breaking point had been reached, wherever you went from here was entirely up to the two of you.

“You said you didn’t want me,” The man’s breath stills, and you feel it just as you hear it; his scanning optics halt their study of your features, as if he had been seeing them for the first time in this light, “That I’d get people killed…why…why do you think I always work by myself nowadays?” Your nose begins to hurt, eyes falling to Keegan’s chest. You try to shove it down, but your hand over his vest shakes slightly. Where was this coming from? Why were you telling him this? The source of your animosity, how you two became, at least in your mind, enemies, “I just didn’t want to be a problem.”

Muttering out the last sentence, you swear Keegan’s chest hitches, heart kickstarting. 

“I…” He begins after a long moment of mutually avoiding eye contact. If you look into those beautifully cold blues you might break. 

But voices from below snap whatever the both of you would externally loathe but internally revel in; the longing in the two pairs of eyes is replaced by duty and unsaid words. The action was mechanical, and both parties rushed to the window, with your fingers grasping the rifle and Keegan grabbing the binoculars from his largest pouch. 

Like birds of prey, the two work in such sync that others would question if they even hated each other at all – and if they had seen the scene just moments prior the thoughts of denial would have been strengthened ten-fold. 

Did you hate Keegan? Or did you hate what he had done? Now really wasn’t the time to question it, but as the Ghost called out the distance and spotted Vidal Teo in pitch darkness, you can’t help but mutter, “Knew you could see in the dark, Kee,” And lined up the shot. 

Your finger pulls the trigger with little more than a second thought, and your shoulder catches the recoil with a grunt leaving your lips. 

“Direct hit. Target down,” A soft hand squeezes your shoulder as you watch the body drop from the scope. Grim satisfaction breeds in your heart. Your eye roves to Keegan’s face, who nods his head at you, “It was a good shot, Princess.”

Face heating, all you do is scoff, rolling your eyes, “Yeah, well…I suppose you called it.”

“Really, you can’t just take the compliment?“

“Do you want me to beat you over the head with this rifle?”

You both stand up and send coded glances to the other, and where the backhanded comments would usually be hostile, the small differences in presentation lean more toward teasing than anything. 

It was…nice. Foreign, but nice.

Chuckling, you toss the rifle around your back and listen to panicked voices echoing out from the warehouse. Keegan still stands near the window, with his back to it, while you inch to the door and itch at the back of your neck. He stares at you strangely, no doubt thinking about what you had confessed prior.

He had no idea you had heard the conversation with Elias. The Ghost’s chest constricts, remembering the words he had said in concern and anger. Had you really heard all of it? That would explain the sudden cold attitude that was mirrored back to him all those months ago.

Damn, Keegan blinks, and his head tilts as you stare back at him with a questioning expression. Your face was innocent with sweaty flesh filled with dust and grime. His fingers itched to wipe away the slash of black dirt from your forehead and, against his will, his stone blue softened to water in his eye sockets.

Your lips twitch at the rare expression. You had a lot to talk about when you both get back to base. 

“We should get going before–” 

Glass shatters, and a loud pop like an opening soda can startles you so bad you swore your heart stopped. Two things happen in that instance that will be ingrained into your head forever, carved like a scar in the fine tissue and tender to the touch.

One, his blood splattered your face, making you blink rapidly and reel back.

Two, the sound of Keegan’s hitting the floor – deadweight – and the loud gasp that exits his mouth, all the air expelled from his lungs not allowing him to even scream.

“Keegan!” You yell, rushing over and grabbing onto his shoulders, flipping him over with a grunt and panicked breath as you brush away the crimson from your eye sockets with a fast hand, “Shit!”

His body slams once more to the old wood, this time his back now on the floor. Blood pools down from a gunshot wound over his right abdomen, and your eyes land on it immediately, lungs struggling to suck down air.

Below you, Keegan lets out a wheezing sound, arm coming half-up to clench in the space above him, shaking violently. 

“Fucken’...” The man gasps, and his body jerks, trying to move despite the hole in his side. Your fingers rip open your medical pouch, eyes darting back to the window. You lightly stand up, frantic eyes darting and freezing. Spying a glint of light reflected from the moon, you quickly dip back to the floor.

Sniper scope. 

Rushing to grab Keegan under the shoulders, he yells out curses as you drag him to the side and out of the line of sight of the window. Tearing out a rag and a roll of gauze from your stash, you look at his face as you shove the cloth against the leaking wound, bunching the fabric and working it into the crater. 

Keegan snarls, head going back to slam to the floor as his eyes flutter. Those blues of his were wide and whizzing back and forth in a primal display, and behind the balaclava, you could see his throat bob with strangled, open-mouthed, breaths. Fuck, fuck, fuck…!

“Hey!” You shout, bringing up one hand and lightly slapping his cheek as you lean your body weight into his side. Your heart was going too fast, it was going to break out of your chest if you didn’t get a grip. But…Keegan’s blood was staining your hands; leaking down your face to drip from your chin. And the fact remained that the Federation soldiers now knew your position and were rushing to the dilapidated lodge. You needed to get him out of here, “Keep your damn eyes open – the only person who gets to kill you is me!”

“What…what the fuck, Princess?”

“You heard me!” Your body was shaking just as much as Keegans as you gnash your teeth together, “‘Doesn’t listen,’ my ass, your ears work less than mine do.” 

You’re panicking; using born and breed sarcasm and clipped words to ease you back into focus.

You had to move him – had to get him out of here. But would you be able to? He was big; far larger than you and weighed twice as much in muscle alone, not to mention the gear... Your mind did the math even as you pleaded with it not to. 

He would have to help you on his own if this was going to work. And that meant keeping him conscious.

Keegan lets out a loud cough, and your fingers itch to move his face-covering so he can breathe better. But you unravel the gauze instead, going to shift his body to wrap it around the rag – holding it in place. 

“Gotta’ move,” He snarls at you, trying to keep the pain at bay as it sweeps over him like waves of water, in and out, in and out.

“Working on it.” 

Right as you tie off a tight knot on the already bloody wrappings, the Ghost tries to get up, an arm turning to slam to the floor behind him and vibrate as he forces his weight on it. Knowing that was a bad idea but not having another choice, you loop one of his arms over your shoulders and grunt. Bearing the brunt of his weight you hold your breath and angle your feet; shoving with all of your strength and gasping out. 

“What the hell do you eat, man? Rocks?” As you grip with your free hand at his limp wrist, you take a quick glance at Keegan when you don’t hear a response. When he’s up, one of your hands goes to wrap around his waist. 

The man’s eyes were fluttering fast, pupils retracted in pain. The blood leaking from him stains your body as you hike his form closer to you, feeling the warmth of the flesh enter your skin like a candle’s flame. 

“Keegan!” You call, shaking his body. The man lets out a low groan, sharp eyes snapping to yours. You're taken aback when you see them immediately soften as they land on your panic-laced form, “You’ve gotta help me, okay?”

Speaking slowly, you hope he listens as he blinks at the blood on your face, eyebrows tensing.

“Copy,” He mutters and sends about the closest he can to a stiff nod your way. 

Immediately all weight is taken from your hold and he stumbles to stand up straight, a hand snapping to his side as his feet drag.

“Not all of it! Idiot!” Growling, you rip him back to you, hissing in disapproval as he lets out a deep curse; nearly falling into you. Forcing him forward, you go as fast as you’re able to the entrance door and already a sheen of exertion is falling over your face. How the hell is he so heavy?

“Fuckin’ confusing, Kid…Just tell me what you– what you want, I’m bleeding out here,” Keegan barks, annoyance falling from him onto you. Was it really that impossible for the two of you to get along that you were fighting while he was seeping crimson all over you? You were getting along just a second ago.

“You’re impossible, Keegan Russ,” You lock onto him in the corner of your eye as you practically drag him to the door, shoving it open with your shoulder. Your fingers dig into his side and his wrist, trying not to get distracted by the strong muscle you feel writhing under your touch. Without meaning to, your grip had gravitated under his shirt, touching bare skin littered with scars and burns – hot and pulsing with life.

Your grip goes deeper, nails creating crescent moons in his flesh as you, somehow, get him down the stairs without falling flat on your face.

Did he just shiver?

“Evac point,” Muttering to yourself, you move faster, heart beating as shouts echo out over the hills, “Shit.”

“Focus,” Keegan utters to your side, “Don’t think about it. What…what’ll happen will happen.”

“Bullshit,” You growl and glance back to see the trail of blood over the ground. Shaking your head you stumble into the treeline, mouth open to help you suck down more air into your lungs, “If you expect me to believe that, you’re a fool.”

“..Maybe,” He coughs, and you have to pause for a moment and look in concern as dark phlegm splatters to the ground. No, you think, no not yet. He can’t do this to you, “Maybe I have been.”

“What,” You attempt a wet chuckle, not liking the conversation but if it kept him awake you would entertain it, “It only took you taking a shot to the side to realize that? There’s no hope for you, Kee.”

“Like when you call me that,” Lips thinning, you work your legs faster, dodging a rock and shimmying past a tree, “Sounds nice.” 

Your face heats at the shock-induced confession, breath inhaled in a sharp breath. 

You look at him, only to find his eyes already locked on your visage. The unrelenting optics ripped you open with how lucid they looked, even if his mouth seemed to have lost its filter. Taking it as a good sign, you tear your head back to the front, biting into your lips as your legs shake.

“You don’t know what you’re saying,” You whisper, clearing your throat as Keegan lets out a small strangled sound from the back of his mouth as you stumble over a log on the ground, “But keep talking to me, yeah?”

“I don’t hate you,” He confessed with a soft voice, “...Was jus’ worried you would hurt yourself. Too hard-headed for your own good.”

“Could say the same thing about you,” Your lungs are burning, but you remind yourself it’s not even half as much pain as Keegan is going through. He carries himself so well, even holding some of his own weight to help you. How was he even still standing? If you had gotten shot like that, you’d be screaming your head off.

He’s a Ghost, You remind yourself, They defy all laws of nature and common sense.

“I’m sorry, Kid,” That makes you stop, body halting halfway through a step as your face blanks, panting out air and eyes popping out at the weak words, “You didn’t deserve to hear that.”

Swallowing down saliva into your dry throat, your mind tells you to keep moving. The meeting in Elias’s office…he was…he was apologizing to you? Stuttering only a moment, you resume your break-neck journey with a burning face and jumping heart. 

“Apology not accepted,” You growl, sending a sharp glance his way. Keegan’s eyes widen in surprise – but they look slightly buggy, “When we get back to the Fort, you’re saying it again…When you’re not getting me all covered in your fluids.”

The chuckle he lets out startles you, but you resist the urge to bring him even closer to your form and bask in his heat. He was…nice to feel against you, you admitted. Strong. Comforting in a rabid dog sort of way.

“Yeah, but you’d like…like that wouldn’t you, Princess?”

…Did he just..? When your jaw drops in shock, he lets out another gasping chuckle that divulges into a coughing fit. Getting your bearing back, you roll your eyes above the embarrassment in your blood even as your lower body pulses. Your legs shuffle as your breath goes thin.

“Let’s keep the dirty jokes under wraps, too, okay?... Who knew blood loss made you into a fucking comedian? Mr. Stand-Up over here.”

“Hm,” Keegan grunts, wheezing in a breath. You watch a dribble of blood fall from the side of his mouth with a grim face, mind running. 

He can’t die, You shake with nerves and adrenaline, I won’t let him. 

There was a brimming affection for the man you had been forcing down like a mouthful of food, and his drunk honestly right now was throwing you for a loop.

“I’ll get you to the Evac point, Keegan, I promise,” The shouts were getting closer, and the Ghost’s eyes were falling closed once more. 

You wanted to see his face – make him stare at you.

“Know you will,” His eyes clenched closed and you felt his weight fall more over you. Groaning breathily, you take it and continue onward with little concern for how your nerves tingle, “Y’know,” The next words he says are so muffled you barely hear them, but when your brain processes the gravel and sifts through the depth of it, you feel tears wet the sides of your vision, “I think I a-actually like you, Kid.”

Keegan goes slack, and the sounds of shouting grow ever closer. It takes everything in you not to scream out.

—

He wakes up with a buzzing in his ears and a bright light assaulting his eyes. It takes Keegan a good while to fully open his eyelids, flinching as the bulbs set into the ceiling seem to only get more violent as his senses come back to him. 

A groan exits his lips, and the scent of bleach and sterile air makes his head rove on the hard pillow under it.

“Well,” A masculine voice results in Keegan jolting up like he was hit with an electrical current, body spasming at him to stay still but not able to stop the ingrained instincts in his head, “Took you long enough. Ajax was just about losing his mind for one of you two to wake up. Had to order him to go run laps.”

“Merrick,” Keegan clenches his hands in pain, but his eyes fall to the man sitting in one of the visitor chairs at the door. The Medical Ward's familiar walls soon entered his sight, and ignoring the flair of agony in his bandaged side, the dark-haired man brought a hand to his face. Keegan takes a deep breath and flinches, “Explain.”

“What happened,” Standing, the stocky man cracks his neck, rolling his shoulders before glancing down to his side. Merrick points over Keegan's shoulder and nods his head, “Is that the girl dragged your limp ass all the way to the Evac point with a bullet wound in ‘er shoulder. Took out a few soldiers as well – one helluva hot exit.”

Sneaking a peak back, Keegan was stunned to find a matching hospital bed not a few feet from his own, a rack for a curtain drawn back to allow a view of a woman asleep; her right arm was in a sling and heavily bandaged, the covers pulled back to her midsection. You. His eyes stay locked on your form, momentarily forgetting the pulling of sutures in his side. 

You had…gotten shot. Protecting him.

“How bad,” His lips move faster than his head, a trait he was beginning to pick up and associate with only you.

“You needed to go into surgery–”

“Not me,” Keegan growled, itching at the gown that had been put on him. His eyes never left you, the peaceful expression on your face he had never seen before leaving a warm feeling in his gut. With a sigh, he mutters out with a tone far softer than it had been before, “Her.”

Merrick smirks, watching the rise and fall of your chest and seeing Keegan doing the same, just far more closely. 

“Prescribed pain meds and on leave for two months. It was a clean shot – lucky for her.”

Keegan nods his head stiffly, moving the pillows up on the elevated mattress and leaning back with a throaty groan. 

“I’ll go tell Elias you’re awake,” Merrick swiftly turns and opens the door, but pauses in the opening. The other man watches closely with a frown. Without turning around, Thomas utters, “Kid was pretty shook up when you wouldn’t come ‘round. You should fix that.”

The Ghost disappears and closes the door behind him. 

Blinking at the wooden barrier, Keegan wastes no time in pushing back the covers of his bed and pressing his feet to the floor; hissing at the chill but only running a hand through his hair in retaliation. His dark eyes watched you as he gritted his teeth at the strain in his side, the faint ripping of stitches. 

The pain didn’t bother him, didn’t sway his actions. His socked feet move over the floor to stand above you. He breathes slowly, sucking down cool air as he pauses for a minute or two.

“You’re something else, Kid,” Keegan whispers, cold eyes narrowing as his thumb goes to swipe away the dirt smudge on your forehead with delicate movements. He didn’t want to wake you. 

The mirror across the room shows a beast of a man carefully cleaning the face of a woman who murmurs to herself, shifting closer to the hold with a small sigh. Keegan, whose lips quirk in a small smile that pulls at scars and black, irreversible, face paint, finds the warmth in his blood addicting. His heart slowly speeds up, and although crimson was staining his bandages, he couldn’t find it in him to go back to bed. 

“If you keep doing that,” Your voice snaps him out of his stupor, and his hand is snatched back to his side in an instant; feet shoulder length apart and tense, “I just might die on you.”

The light above you plays in your eyes, bouncing off the color and reflecting it directly into Keegan’s iris as the skin of your eyelids peel back. You blink up at him, vision coming back into focus as you stretch your legs out under the covers. 

Sending a small smile to his blank face, you chuckle, “What?” You groan, “I was being sarcastic.”

A smirk is all you get, a slight twitching at the side of his lips at the fatigue in your tone.

“How long?” Keegan asks, raising a dark brow. Knowing what he’s asking, you scoff, face bright.

“Only about five minutes. I caught the end of Merricks conversation,” You reply.

“Hm.”

“Don’t give me that look – I’m in the room, what do you want me to do…not listen? Tch,” Your hand presses into the mattress, shoving you up. 

A hand splays over your back immediately to help. 

Goosebumps litter your arms as Keegan’s grip lightly digs into your gown, assisting you where your other arm can’t. Sparing him a glance, you watch with heat on your ears and neck as his attention remains solely fixated on you. Blue breaks open your skin and infects you with its chill. Liking the feel of it, you let it in and embrace it. 

When you’re sitting up, silence ensues, with Keegan’s eyes studying your body as you do the same. His hand remained on your back. 

Does he remember what he said? You wonder, locking on the thick wrappings under the man’s gown with a frown, Or was he too out of it?

“Feelin’ alright, Princess?” Your eyebrows raise as he tilts his head.

“I should be asking you that.”

“We both got shot,” Keegan shoots back, and the black around his eyes creases as he deadpans at you.

“You passed out – I didn’t. Don’t blame me because you decided to take a nap, Big Guy.”

“So, you’re just full of nicknames now, are you?” 

“Hm,” You smirk, voice low and teasing, “Perhaps…Raccoon Eyes.”

Keegan scoffs, turning his head away in exasperation. You were both the same people from hours ago, but something felt different – the air was lighter, bordering on sacred. Looking at each other with hesitant vulnerability, hearts yearning but not quite certain where to begin. So many jagged pieces of glass to buffer out, smooth along the edges, and pray that they became mosaics of brightly colored perfection that glittered in the sunlight. But you could still slice your fingers open, despite the years of practice and knowledge of that sacred art, feel the blood splatter the table and leak into the fine lines of your palm.

But, perhaps, it was time to try. 

“I guess I owe you one,” You admit awkwardly, suddenly avoiding eye contact and feeling sheepish. This was new to you, “You saved me from a sniper but I couldn’t see the one behind you.”

“You owe me twice, then,” When you send him a scalding look, he puffs out a breath to show it was a joke and continues as you roll your eyes and smile softly, “..but, uh,” Keegan clears his throat, “Don’t…worry about it, Kid,” Your eyes snap to his side profile, blinking in shock as his eyes rove the room, watching the cracks in the floors as you gape at him. Why…why did he sound like that? Like the gravel in his words had smoothed over and was suddenly a paved road with moss along the edges; gentle to the touch. And why did your heart skip a beat at it, “Forget about it.” 

“...What?” Your voice is small, genuine confusion whispered out as you watch the muscles in his face move. Keegan’s jaw was clenched, his nose scrunching as he rolled it and fixed his stance. It was adorable the way he was trying not to face you.

His head turns to his gear that Merrick had placed on the large table across the room. You watch him lightly limp to it, mind still trying to think through what was going on. His shredded hand goes to the back pocket of his folded cargo pants, and your ears twitch at a crinkling nose. The Ghost pulls out an empty chocolate wrapper and you feel your heart stop all together when he holds it aloft. He shuffles back over. 

“It was alright, little stale, but not bad,” Those steel blue eyes slide to yours, and your face heats; throat tightens. Since when has your pulse rampaged like that outside of a gun battle? Keegan’s lips quirk into a slow smirk at your expression, “Not bad at all. I’m sorry that I ate it all.”

You have to look away before you pass out, all confidence now gone and dignity stomped on when you realized that you liked when he looked at you with those eyes of his. Your hand clenches over the covers, finding that double meaning with brimming affection.

Oh, you just hated him…but your breath still gets stolen all the same.

“Yeah, well,” Your hand goes to scratch at the back of your neck to ground yourself, “Don’t get used to it, Kee. That bar was worth like fifty bucks if we’d have just sold it.”

You decide his laugh is better than any old chocolate bar, and that you wanted to taste it on your tongue until the very sun died out. Until your bones were bleach white from age.

There was no doubt he remembered what he had told you as you dragged him along, scared and wishing he would stay awake; that was simply judging by the sparkle in his pupil and the way he was facing you now. 

Smirking, you raise a brow and grab the man by the collar of his gown. 

Ah, what the hell. Better to start strong.

When you smash his lips to yours, you decide right then and there when Keegan melts into you, his hand going to grip the back of his head, that maybe being enemies wasn’t so bad at all.

[loveandmurders]

If you’re taking requests, could you do a soulmate au with Bo and Vincent meeting their s/o for the first time? Thanks and have a good one!

Hello sweetie, thank you so much for this very cute request!

I wasn't too sure you wanted Bo and Vincent to share their s/o but it's what I did! I wrote two parts for this, but if people enjoy this AU, I might keep going.

Hope you'll enjoy <3

FINALLY FOUND YOU (Part I) - Bo Sinclair x female reader x Vincent Sinclair

Warnings: a little bit of angst, mentions of murders and malevolent intentions, mentions of sexual desires, mentions of Bo's chair, a few strong words

Vincent was at the kitchen table, sipping on his coffee as he was watching his wrist with a lot of attention. The little black spiral with two dots reminded him that he was supposed to have a soulmate, somewhere in this world, sharing this same mark with him. It reminded him that he most likely would never find them because of his way of life, and it was breaking his heart a little more than he would like to admit it. He even became a workaholic because it prevented him from thinking and being hurt by the thought that the choices he made to follow his mother’s work was actually destroying any happy future with his soulmate.

He looked up from his wrist when he saw Bo coming in, always a little bit ashamed to be caught staring at his mark. He should be stronger and better than dreaming of his soulmate. Because love really didn’t matter.

“Whatcha doin’?” Bo asked and Vincent shrugged. “Watchin’ the soulmate mark again?” he arched an eyebrow at his twin “Com’on Vinny, ‘m gonna believe ya’re a romantic.” Bo teased his brother who rolled his eye at him and left the room to get back into his basement. Vincent couldn’t stand talking about it, and Bo was only hiding his own hurt under teasing and jokes.

Bo sighed and rolled his sleeve to be able to have a look at his own mark. It was a circle with two dots on top of it. He sighed. Like his twin, he had no hope to ever find his soulmate, and sometimes, late at night, it was like a hole inside his chest, a missing piece that he would neve be able to find.

Sometimes he wondered if his brothers and himself didn’t make a mistake.

You were thinking the same thing as you were currently lost in the middle of nowhere with an unhappy car. Because of the Louisiana heat, your car engine was forcing you to have breaks from time to time or it was worryingly fuming a thick white smoke. You were currently out of your car, cursing yourself for not having borrowed a better one, but it would have been more expensive too. And you were cursing the universe for being where you were - a dusty road - with no connection. You couldn’t even call your parents to ask them to help you read a stupid old map that you had laid down on the hood. At the gas station you went by, they sold maps but you didn’t realise they were ten years old. You were supposed to go to Mexico for a little holiday by yourself. But instead you were there, not even certain anyone would come by to help you.

After a little while, you sat back inside the car. You leaned against the seat before looking down at your shoulder where your soulmate mark was. It was a spiral inside a circle with three dots around it. You often wondered where the person was. Your parents met so early in their youth, so you were getting a little bit desperate and impatient. 

You also were very curious because of all the things you heard about soulmates, and especially about your own mark. Your grandmother used to say, when she was still alive, that your mark was a special and complex one. You had three dots which meant you might have two soulmates. You did notice that it was rare to see more than two dots, and you often wondered if she was right about it.

But what was the point of having two soulmates if none of them were currently in your life? 

You sighed. This day would have been so much easier if you knew even just one of them. You could have called them at the gas station and they would have decided that it was too stupid of you to leave like that, and they would have found you and left for holidays with you. No actually, you would have left for holidays with them right away. And you wouldn’t be in this mess.

You could be so impulsive sometimes. You really needed someone to keep an eye on you. And if the universe thought you needed two people for this job, it might be right! But where were they then?

You shook your head, it wasn’t the right time to think about it right now. There was no one to help you and you needed to find the right path. You noticed that your car stopped fuming and you thought it might be a good moment to resume driving. You decided that it was like when you were lost in a forest, you needed to keep going straight in front of you to find a way out. It was what you did and it kind of worked because you arrived at the sign indicating the House of Wax Museum of Ambrose. You didn’t remember seeing anything about this city on the map but you thought it might be a good place to stop by. You hoped that someone could help you with the directions or your car or, even better, with both. 

Those past few weeks you had felt like you were running out of luck. You couldn’t even count the number of glasses and plates you clumsily let fall on the ground and broke. You couldn’t count either the number of times you accidentally hit the corner of a table, entered into a wall or a door. Your mother had told you it might be good news but you didn’t see why. Then she explained that there was this old wife tale about running out of luck before meeting your soulmate. Apparently the more bad luck happening to you before finally finding your soulmate, the more intense your bond would be with them. 

You couldn’t stop yourself from thinking that the universe had a twisted sense of humour if that was true.

You kept following the road, trying to see where you needed to turn to go into Ambrose. You were about to find the right intersection when your car decided it wasn’t going to go any further. At the instant, it stopped, you started to scream and you hit your wheel, hurting your hand in the process. You wanted to break something so you grabbed the map and destroyed it. You finally calmed down and leaned into your seat, closing your eyes. You looked down at the pieces of sheet absolutely everywhere and facepalmed. Alright, you needed to take a big breath and to walk to Ambrose. It was going to be alright.

You stepped out of the car, took the keys, just in case, and started to walk. The heat was getting quite unbearable and you couldn’t wait to ask someone for some water and to lie down under some shade. You weren’t feeling too well, a little bit nauseous too. You had no idea how much longer you would be able to keep going. 

You finally reached the town… and you collapsed. You had walked for quite a long time under the sun and your body just couldn’t take any more of it.

Bo was leaving the church so he saw you falling. He thought that it was his lucky day. 

It had been a couple of days no one came by, and you clearly didn’t look like someone who could resist them. Bo thought you were going to be such an easy job that he could even just hand you over to Vincent for him to put burning hot wax on you. It was a plan he would be happy to follow… Except if you were pretty enough to end on his special chair. 

He walked to you and realised you were already starting to get back to reality. Your head was hurting quite a lot though and you instinctively brought a hand to it. He looked at your face and body with a lot of attention like a predator gauging its prey. Damn, he had to admit you were going to be such a snack. Actually, he didn’t remember having desired someone that much before. To the point, he wasn’t even certain he wanted to share anything with Vincent. He would be very glad to keep you all to himself in his garage. His heart twitched a little bit at the thought of him hurting you though… But he was a dangerous man, it was in his nature. He couldn’t help it, right? 

You tried to ask for help as you were half aware of the shadow of a man looming over you, not realising that the man was eager to give you anything but help. You were too weak to understand, and your mouth too dry to beg. Bo was about to grab your arm when he saw your soulmate mark.

He wasn’t an expert but it looked familiar and new at the same time. He cursed under his breath and instead of pulling you down the road like a sack of potatoes, he gently lifted you up and carried you bridal style to his house. You fainted again as if your body calmed down in Bo’s presence. He wanted to ask Vincent what he thought about the mark.

As a family and conservative man, he grew up with the strong belief that two things couldn’t be messed with: God and soulmate marks. So he really didn’t want to do something stupid if you happened to be his soulmate… Or Vinny’s… Or both. Bo couldn’t really explain why he felt that way, but he recognised his circle and Vincent’s spiral on you. He thought he might be wrong though. If the man realised you weren’t their soulmate, boy, he would give you such an awful death for having given them false hopes like that.

Bo opened the house door with his back and put you down on the couch. He had a closer look at your soulmate mark. The three dots were putting him off a little because he only had two, like Vincent. The circle really seemed to be his, though. He thought that Vincent, with his artistic eye, would be better at telling if your soulmate mark was identical to theirs. Bo screamed Vincent’s name for his twin to come over. Bo wondered about something though; if you were both the men’s soulmate, how would they be able to share you? He shook his head, he was probably imagining things and you were just a random lost tourist who was soon going to be killed.

Vincent arrived soon after, a little bit surprised his brother was already back home and asking for him. He was even more surprised when he saw the most gorgeous darling on the couch. He sent a quizzical glance to Bo who gestured toward your shoulder. Vincent had a closer look and paused. He looked back at Bo.

“Ok, ‘s stupid, but… Looks like our soulmate marks” Bo explained before looking away. It was a sensitive subject when he couldn’t annoy his twin about it. Vincent looked back and his fingers gently traced your mark. It felt like electricity was running down his hand. It was a very obsessing and addicting feeling. He definitely wanted more, but Bo couldn’t stop himself from grabbing his twin’s wrist. He only realised what he did when Vincent turned back to him in curiosity.

“Shit, don’t know why I did that… Just don’t touch her, ok?” Bo grumbled and Vincent hummed.

Vincent went into the kitchen to grab a noteblock and a pen. He quickly reproduced his own mark on the paper. He silently asked Bo to show him his, which Bo did a little bit reluctantly. Vincent tried to overlap the two marks. He placed his spiral inside Bo’s circle and realised that one of the dots was placed in the same way for both of them, which did create three dots in total. He placed the paper next to your shoulder. Your mark and his little drawing were identical.

“Shit” Bo repeated and both the men sat down.

They stayed silent for a little while, watching you sleeping and thinking how gorgeous you were and how relieved they were to have finally found you. 

But something was bothering the two of them: how were they supposed to share you?

PART II

[celestie0]

ellie's writing tips

hellooo this is just a lil masterpost for the writing tips i have collected over my time writing since it's a question i get often!! this way it's all in one place <3 this is also for my own reference to look back on when i forget them lol

tips for specifically writing long fics

on coming up with a main storyline.

planning out a general idea & premise at the beginning of the fic that helps two characters get closer to one another, such as a forced proximity, some sort of mutual agreement, a mission to complete, etc. is a great way to get the ball rolling on a fic and can create environments between characters that feels connected and necessary rather than forced

on coming up with secondary storylines.

after laying down the main groundwork, building some side storylines adjacent to the main one that will give you options down the line to play with narratively (you don't need to figure out exactly what you want to do with secondary plotlines up front, but having them in place can create flexibility in your story to pivot towards some ideas if you'd like to later in the story)

on planning chapters & scenes.

it's wise to have a general idea for your series, but it's also okay to scrap those ideas if ultimately they don't work. there will be scenes that do not make sense or fit in the way you thought they would've, and making last minute decisions is okay and totally normal. sometimes better answers will find you along the way, and it's only a testament to how well you're getting to know your own story and also your own characters. it's also okay to plan multiple path ideas for your story, and choose whichever one fits best once you get to that point. it's not necessary to have a scene-by-scene in order to start writing! planning is useful, but writing is more important

on finding motivation to continue long fics.

having certain "key" scenes planned out in the very early stages of writing that you know you will look forward to writing can help with finding motivation. it will also help you find momentum to write during points where you might have some writer's block. also, one of the best tips i have seen for writing chaptered fics, is to end your chapters when you still have a little bit left planned. so cutting it like 10% short so that you have an immediate jumping off of point that you can start with for the next chapter

my general writing tips

inspiration. starting off w a concept or idea that you already know you like from a tv show or book works really well for fanfiction! for example if you like spiderman, then you can write a canon-adjacent spiderman au w your fave character from an anime or something. and then maybe once you start writing, your own original ideas start to come into play and you go off of those. i think in the fanfic community, people adore spin-offs & mainstream concept ideas

dialogue. my biggest tip for dialogue would be to just write all of your dialogue for a scene completely stripped down. none of the “he says” & “she says” or action verbs in between, just write it all out like it was a simple text convo w quotation marks. that way the words will sound realistic because you’re only picturing a convo in your head, rather than also trying to juggle all the descriptive prose. then, you can go back in to fluff things up. if it’s meant to be comedic or a fast-paced argument, keeping it relatively stripped down is the way to go, but if it’s something intense or suspenseful then fluffing it up may be the better choice. also, i find dialogue becomes easier the more you write for a specific character, so if it’s not flowing right away, don’t worry!! their words will find you eventually once you get to know the character better :)

on choosing conflicts. characters won’t always act perfect, but i think a great way to make conflict seem realistic is for them to act in character but with flaws, rather than out of character with flaws. maybe make a list of what that character’s good qualities and how those qualities could also work against them, and use the latter to brainstorm realistic conflict that those qualities could put them in (ex: a character is self-sufficient, but that causes them to rely on ppl less when they need it -> they fail to reach out for help in timely manners and leads to mistakes/regrets)

pacing. when starting off a story, don’t be afraid to just jump straight into it! or jump straight into the dialogue and then build the scene gradually as it progresses, rather than [big block of text in beginning of scene that reader must drag their eyes through] and then get to the dialogue. make sure the pacing fits the scene (romantic -> longer paragraphs more focused on subtle details, comical -> short paragraphs n dialogue heavy w simple n relatable diction, etc)

for tone and mood. to get words flowing for different scenes, it can be really useful to get into the environment of those scenes while you’re writing, such as listening to a song that fits the vibe of the scene prior to/during writing, or if its a scene at night, write it w the lights off, or watch a youtube vid w scenery that matches. may sound silly, but it could help!

read more. this is sort of a miscellaneous one but a good way to subconsciously get better at writing is to just read more! your brain kinda learns how to write on its own when you read. also, when i’m reading, if i see words i really like i jot them down in my notes app so i have my own lil vocabulary of words that i know i would like to use in my writing

on writing insecurities. be proud of your writing!! your first draft does NOT have to be perfect. some days the words will flow, but on some they won’t, and that’s okay. don’t get too into your head about “i wonder what readers will think of this plot point or this character action” etc, i think having faith in your own process but also in your readers will bring you a lot of peace as you write :) create what you want to create and the rest will follow!! at the end of the day it’s just a hobby and you should be writing what YOU want to write!! and just get started! ☺️ that’s the easiest way to write—is to just write 🫶🏼💕

use chatgpt. looool ai can be useful in writing too! i usually only use it after i'm completed with a draft, and i just plug select paragraphs into it to see if it can come up with some better words for me to use. it's also useful to come up with logistical details for aspects of your stories for world-building etc

[lilacgaby]

I love your writing style! Could you do maybe a sfw alphabet for tamaki?

aa tysm! i love tamaki so ofc!

a- affection,

tamaki shows his affection through gifts. buys you little gifts and treats from his travels around japan, always thinking of you as he passes by shops. he just gets too nervous to speak or share his love for you, but as he places another themed keychain in your hand, you know he loves you.

b- best friend

as a best friend he'd be a great listener. probably gives great advice that he never applies to himself, but encourages you greatly. probably views you highly too, admiring your best traits.

c- comfort

he'd comfort you with his presence. making sure you know that he's there for you whether you need him, listening with taut ears as you explain what's wrong, or just holding you if you can't speak.

d- domestic

he'd be a good cook because of his quirk! he'd cook a variety of different things you've never tried before, types of meats you would've never tried but he surprisingly made taste good. while i don't think he's a meat freak, i think he'll make an effort to keep clean.

e- end

if he broke up with you... something's wrong with you. sorry.

if you broke up with him.. something's wrong with you, again not sorry. but, he'd be distraught, his anxiety coming back and worsened for like a week, not to mention mirio, fatgum, and kiri HATE you. deserved though.

f- fiance

i see tamaki as the guy to want a perfect relationship, and he'd value marriage highly. he waits about three years to propose to you, but values your opinion highly, so if you want to get married quicker or wait he'd listen to you.

g- gentle

he's the definition of gentle. so sweet with you and if he even thinks he hit you forget it, he'd probably beg for your forgiveness, and treat you like glass for the rest of the day, even after you reassure him.

h- hugs

first time you hugged him he almost passed away from glee, he loves hugs now. hug him please.

i - ily

he says i love you a year into the relationship. you just make him so indescribably happy that he couldn't put it in to words, but it slipped out on your anniversary date. since then, it's become a bit easier for him to say it, but he still gets flushed.

j- jealous

i think his jealousy mind stem more from insecurity than your actions, he'd feel like you'd deserve someone more confident, and seeing you hang around with a confident person would upset him mentally. wouldn't voice it much though.

k- kisses

kiss him and he'll die.. but now he can't live without them. has to get one before he leaves out to a mission please, or else it's all he'll think about.

l- little ones

surprisingly good with kids! especially ones on the more timid side like him, he doesn't feel as judged as he plays with them. and it's sooo cute to see him using his quirk to impress them.

m- morning

his favorite way to wake up is huddled up with you in his bed, i will die on my belief that he's a little spoon, so he loves waking up in your chest, your hands wrapping him close to you as the sun peeks in.

n- night

he's probably exhausted after his patrols, he gets home late sometimes, and the think he wants the most is to be with you. he collapses into you, after showering of course, and falls asleep to the beats of your heart.

o- open

you have to be his friend before his lover, sorry! he'll open up to you after becoming close friends, which might take a while.

p- patience

i think he's a patient guy, in arguments and overall in life. he'll do his best to stay calm, but he's not great at regulating his emotions so he'll let it out sometimes!

q- quizzes

great listener who knows everything about you. knows your favorite color, song, where you want to go, even knows things about yourself before you yourself know them.. kinda telepathic in that's sense.

r- remembers

you know that common 'forgets your anniversary/birthday trope?' yeah not happening with this man. he has his calendar marked, alarms set, assistant notified. yeah he'll be on top of it.

s- security

he'd stand up for you if the time called for it. putting away his anxious thoughts as he fought for you, or stood up for you. even though after he'd freak out a bit, hed be happy as he saw the look in your eyes.

t- try

he'll try so hard in your relationship, he just wants everything to go right. plans out everything by the hour :(

u- ugly

he has no bad habits sorry! perfect man in my eyes.

v- vanity

isn't obsessed with his looks that much, just wants to look cool. doesn't worry over your looks either, he thinks you're perfect </3

w- whole

god forbid you have to go somewhere without him, or he has a mission without you. he just feels so incomplete without you and your comfort, your hugs, your kisses, but your reunion is so cute everytime that it makes up for it.

x- xtra

he lives off your compliments, like if you randomly don't compliment him he'll be sad for the rest of the day.

y- yuck

he would hate for anyone to be cocky and rude, so obnoxious and inconsiderate.

zzz- sleep

as i said, little spoon tamaki on top! loves it when you sleep facing towards eachother, once you tried it once, he literally cannot sleep any other way.

best boy tamaki ahghb :((

[spelviin]

okay SO

the fucking beat where sparrow tries to go in for the hug and henry hesitates and only half-heartedly returns it.

i had to go back to 2x23 to double-check this, but henry never hugged either of the boys in that flashback, either, and i got some Thoughts abt why that might be.

bc i've been thinking for a while that the way that lark went about drawing henry's blood at the end of s1 was kinda uniquely fucking cruel.

because like. the prophecy just said he needed to spill it. spill the blood of the unsung hero, and you'll summon the doodler. that's it.

and there were sooooo many other, different, easier ways he could have done it. he could have made it look like an accident. the boys roughhoused so much, all it would have taken was to subtly put a scrape on henry during a tussle, and it would have achieved the exact same result.

he didn't have to do what he did.

and what he did was a deep, traumatic, profound fucking betrayal.

like, obviously, lark was like 12-13 when this all went down, so he may very well not have even picked up on this, but we as the audience had seen henry CONSISTENTLY having to beg for love in the second half of s1 - from his father, from his mother, from lark - and consistently being rejected. he was so fucking starved of it, he was so fucking sick with stress over things deteriorating with lark - of course he would jump at any chance for reconciliation.

and lark offered that reconciliation. whether he was aware of the manipulation or not, he knew his father would never refuse an olive branch offered to him, and especially that he'd never withhold physical affection.

so he offered a hug, pretended he wanted to patch things up-

-and promptly stabbed henry in the fucking back, ending the entire fucking world in the process.

like, that shit's gonna stick with a person. even though it's his kid, even though he was young, even though henry never blamed him, even though he put all his energy into not blaming him... that kind of betrayal is gonna leave its mark somehow.

and so i can't help but wonder if, even though he never outwardly showed anger towards the boys for what they (or at least lark) did to him, there's still that tiny bit of hesitation, of fear, every time he hugs his sons.

if even though he managed to push through it - because again, this is henry we're talking about, he would never in a million years want his children to feel unloved in any way - even all these years later, there's still a tiny part of him that can't hug his kids without remembering that knife in his back.

[tgmsunmontue]

From the top 3/? (WIP)

IceMav, (eventual) Explicit, (background Hangster who are already established). Set post-TGM. (No dead Ice obviously).

Featuring not-mistaken identities (where they (Ice and Mav) pretend to be in the dark for REASONS), Ice is Jake's Uncle Tom, Mav is Bradley's Dad, everyone knows everyone, (un)requited love, coming out as an older person, and a little bit of a circus-vibe where Ice has a horrible realization that this is indeed his circus and these are also his monkeys.

An AU where Mav married Carole and adopted Bradley to make things easier legally. A USNA Bradley who has been very careful to separate Dad/Pete from godfather/Maverick. They had an argument prior to TGM, but it was around Maverick being careless with his life (RE: Darkstar because Bradley got the call that Maverick was missing, presumed dead). So it was about risk taking and thinking while flying, so that was happening and Bradley admits to the Dagger Squadron that Maverick is his godfather and they have a ‘complicated relationship’ which isn’t a lie per se, however it’s… complicated.

CHAPTER ONE CHAPTER TWO

CHAPTER THREE

                Pete is pretty sure he’s chatting with Ice. Tom. He chats the same way he types, all correct with capital letters and punctuation in the right place. Pete does as well of course, but it’s too much of a coincidence that Bradley installed Grindr on his phone and Tom’s cousin’s kid installed it on his phone. And now they’re chatting anonymously. Except Pete is pretty sure he knows exactly who is on the other side. He’s just asked what his biggest secret is, not sure what he’s expecting as an answer because he’s pretty sure he knows all of Ice’s secrets.

>>I’m in love with my best friend.

>>Have been for a long time.

                Pete stares at the words and just… cannot fathom what to say.

                Is Ice in love with Slider?

                Or someone else?

                Before now he’d have thought he was Ice’s best friend.

                Surely Ice doesn’t mean him though.

                Does he?

                He lets the realization that Ice may in fact be talking about him wash over him and Pete can’t help the little flare of hope. He’d never thought that maybe he and Ice could be more than friends. He’d definitely fantasized about it in his quietest and saddest moments, when he’d felt lonely and thought about coming home to him. His friendship has always been enough to sustain him.

                Before.

                Before he’d known that there might even be the slimmest chance. Now though? Well, other than the fact that Ice hadn’t trusted him stings a little, but also he understands, it’s not like he was shouting it from the roof tops. He’d just assumed Ice had known. His fault.

>>I recently found out that my best friend is gay.

                He stares at the message and wonders what Tom will say back. Wonders whether he should maybe ring Slider and do some digging.

>>Oh.

>>Really?

>>Yep.

>>He’s been unattainable the whole time I’ve known him, and I’ve cherished his friendship, thinking that was all I could ever have.

>>I had placed him very firmly in a box marked DO NOT TOUCH.

>>Fascinating.

>>And now?

>>Now I want to sweep him off his feet.

>>Do you think he’ll appreciate that?

                Pete grins to himself and taps out his answer.

>>I’m not going to give him much choice in the matter.

…            …            …

                Tom stares at the words and snorts in amusement, but the slow bubbling excitement is fizzing through his blood as he considers the implications that Mav is going to woo him. He’s never been wooed before, and casting his mind back Maverick is not subtle when it comes to affairs of the heart. Stolen planes and public serenades are definitely his speed. He’s not sure if he’s quite ready to be the recipient of such gestures, but if it’s the choice between having Maverick or not having Maverick he knows what his decision is.

>>So, while I know my kid hoped that I was going to maybe dip my toes in the dating pool with you, I’m going to have to let you down gently…

                Tom frowns, because surely Pete knows it’s him he’s talking to, unless he’s trying to give Tom an out?

>>Well, as I said. In love with my best friend and I’m in no rush to get over him.

>>I wish you luck in wooing your best friend.

>>Thanks. I think I’m going to need it.

>>I doubt that very much.

>>How about you try asking your best friend out?

>>Report back to me?

                Tom rolls his eyes, even without the social clues and seeing Mav in front of him he can tell Mav is teasing and part of him wants to call him on it but he also likes this flimsy excuse of pretending they aren’t going to… do what exactly? Try a couple of dates? Hell. They already do that when Mav is in town.

                Oh.

                Oh no.

                He’s going to have to try and be romantic back.

…            …            …

                It’s their standing weekly dinner when they’re both in the same area.

                Nothing special about it.

                He’d received a message from Ice asking if he was still coming over, he’d answered in the affirmative and then he’s had a little freakout that he was having dinner with Ice. He’d talked himself down, because he’s had so many dinners with Ice he’s lost count. But this is different. It’s a dinner date with Ice. He takes extra care getting ready, has to drive his car rather than his bike, because he’d like the flowers he bought to arrive intact rather than a mash of petals barely holding together.

                He knows he judged right when Ice answers the door. That’s the first difference, because he’s clearly been waiting for Pete to arrive rather than letting him simply push open the door or use the key Ice gave him when he moved in. Huh. He should have maybe considered that action more closely at the time. Secondly, Ice is wearing nicer clothes than usual. So is he of course, but in the dark fabric Ice's legs look even longer than he knows they are.

                “Hey Pete.”

                “Hey. Something smells good.”

                “Thanks.”

                He always compliments Ice on his cooking, but this is the first time he sees or notices the slight blush his comment causes. Fuck. Has he really been this clueless all these years? Then he realizes that Ice is looking at the flowers in his hands. Sunflowers. Because Ice has opinions regarding flowers. Roses are too pedestrian, lilies remind him of funerals, but sunflowers... Those make him smile. Whether a single one or a large bouquet, they never fail to bring a smile to his face and right now is no exception, although it’s a little shy and seeing Ice look so soft makes him want to wrap him up and hold him tight. His heart does a little stutter at the idea that he might actually get to do that, maybe one day soon even.

                “Let me put these in a vase for you…”

                “Thanks. I’ll just go and check on dinner. Glass of wine?”

                “Yeah, please.”

                On his hunt for a vase he spies the table, set for two, and it's not super unusual, but neither is it normal. Most often they usually eat in the living room, plates balanced precariously on their knees. Not tonight. Tonight lots of things are different. Little things, but they’re adding up, one atop of another into something monumentally huge. He turns to find Ice watching him, glass of wine held out between long fingers and he takes it, fingers brushing Ice’s slightly. It’s an accidental brush, but it feels like every hair on his body is suddenly standing on end, hyperaware. He licks his lips, doesn't know if he's imagining it or not, the weight of Ice's gaze on him, but it’s so heavy he can almost feel it on him like a calming weight.

                Things slip back into normalcy, conversation focusing around work and their extended group of friends, and he can almost pretend that it’s two or three weeks ago before he knew that Ice was gay. That Ice is in love with him. The knowledge still sends jittery excitement through his veins and over his skin, and when Ice directs him to the table to eat he doesn’t miss the barely-there hand on his lower back, like Ice isn’t sure it would be welcome or not. He needs to make sure that Ice knows it is, welcome and wanted.

                He settles into his seat and reaches his legs out carefully, then purposely rests his ankle against Ice’s. It’s all so innocent and careful, like they’re equally wary. But he’s always been the one more prepared to take the leap of faith and he notes the little spots of pink high on his cheeks and feels the same thrill as getting tone on a target.

                Bullseye.

…            …            …

                He’s slept with Pete. Spent the night curled together in a bed more than once when they were younger. Purely platonically of course, and he’d been younger, dumber and much more of a glutton for self-flagellation when he’d realized he was in love with his straight best friend. They’d gotten older and they hadn’t really needed to share a bed again, although passing out drunk on the sofa had also happened plenty.

                Needless to say, he’s familiar enough with touching Pete’s body that the simple press of his ankle against Tom’s shouldn’t be as arousing as it is. He knows, logically, that it’s not the touch exactly, that his brain has gone into overdrive thinking about the touch elsewhere. That the possibility of that touch happening is now almost certain after years of fantasizing about it. He fully expects Pete to bring it up, the whole silly situation with the misunderstood identities. Pete’s always faced things like this head on. He doesn’t bring it up though. So neither does Tom.

                They finish dinner, and Pete insists on doing the dishes, which is usual. Neither of them can stand to leave the mess sitting around, too many years of ingrained habit of having to be clean and tidy. He doesn’t miss the way Pete’s body is in his personal space more, every movement feels charged with electricity, making him hyperaware of the distance between them, of the warmth emanating from Pete’s body when he passes close by. He wonders what Pete would do if he just pressed him against the bench and kissed him, lifted him up onto the side table and slid his hands around him.

                He doesn’t do anything of the sort of course, but he thinks about it, each thought getting worse and he finds his pants getting a little too tight. Lord. He’s too old for inconveniently timed erections, this is ridiculous.

                “I’ll go set up the chess board.”

                Pete hums his acknowledgment and Tom wonders if Pete can tell, or knows what kind of effect he’s having. He finds he doesn’t care either way. The evening has felt both familiar and comforting, reminding him why he and Pete have been friends for so long. Layered over it though is a fresh newness, or maybe rather than it been layered over it’s been peeled back, exposing both of them to the potential of more. They play chess and he’s distracted, it takes him longer to win than usual, and the smirk on Pete’s face tells him that he’s perfectly aware of why.

                He really does love the asshole.

…            …            …

                He’s pulling on his jacket when he remembers. Ice is going to Hawaii for two weeks, where he’s meant to be based, and Pete is back in the good graces through his recent heroic actions, despite what Cyclone thinks.

                “I’m headed back to China Lake for some testing. Be gone a few weeks but should be back here by the time you get back.”

                “Hmm. Have a good time in China Lake. I'll see you when we’re both back in town.”

                “Yeah. Of course.”

                Every part of him is screaming to close the distance between them and just grab Ice’s face and pull him down into a kiss but he’s suddenly frozen with indecision. Terrified that maybe he will screw things up. Or maybe just somehow disappoint him. Which he realizes is such a ridiculous thing considering the number of times he’s had to ring Ice and listen to his disappointed sigh on the other end of the line as he’s explained exactly what he’s done and why it’s pissed someone off.

                Huh.

                Maybe he should have figured out that Ice was in love with him earlier.

                Instead he reaches for Ice’s hand and brings it to his lips, brushes a kiss over his knuckles and he doesn’t let his eyes leave Ice’s face. Takes in the widening pupils, his mouth dropping open slightly, and pink stain returning to his cheeks and Pete preens inwardly. Feels so infinitely powerful that he can make Ice look like this without even kissing him.

                “Thanks for dinner Tom.”

                He never uses Ice’s given name, but he uses it now, because this whole evening is about changing their relationship, moving the dynamics of what they have into something more and he wants Ice to know he’s all in.