#i think i forgot to post this last year
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Happy five year anniversary to Andi Mack making Disney history
#cyrus goodman#andi mack#one in a minyan#joshua rush#my gifs#don't look at me#how has it been five years already#i think i forgot to post this last year#i miss andi mack so much
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aftermath
#definitely a top ten part of mth for me#i drew this like.... two years ago and completely forgot to post it for some reason LMAOOO#to all of u who followed me for ppg/mth stuff i promise im still thinking of u guys#i have some sketches and doodles in the works from over the last couple years i just do not have the time to finish it up because school :(#anyways#greens#more than human#sbj more than human#sbj mth#ppg#buttercup#butch#art tag
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When I talk about something bad I've experienced, Baked In to my experience as A Woman, I am not "making my little cousins feel like shit for being women", because I am talking in a space with, allegedly, adults. I am not bringing my problems to children in the first place. That said, I don't HAVE to make my baby cousin feel bad, because she's already experienced sexual harassment in her life, and she's only 8, and doesn't even understand what any of it means yet. And everyone in her family can try to instill confidence in her, and never talk about our bodies in a negative way. But she can still feel like she's too chubby, because she still goes to school, and talks to other kids and their parents, and still sees ads, and still watches tv. We can be positive, but we can't fix the root of the problem. And I don't HAVE to tell trans women that "pain is a rite of passage", because that's not a Rule being enforced (by me), because I've already sat and listened to my friend complain about constantly shaving as a Baseline necessity and how it hurts her skin and she has to put makeup onto fresh cuts on her face because going out without a full face of properly feminine makeup would make her life worse, and being anything less than thin and lithe makes her "less feminine", and ALL the things that can make her "more feminine" are behind a paywall. And I can try to make her feel better, and I can hear her experiencing the tenfold version of problems I relate to, but I can't fix the root cause of her problems by just telling her not to complain. Forcing happiness as a core personality trait for women is not the Girlboss Feminist move that you think it is, and no amount of gender euphoria in the world will make you immune to systemic oppression.
#sergle.txt#you cunts learned the term 'toxic positivity' years ago and forgot it instantly#putting a bandaid on a fuckin severed leg is what it is#do i wish i wasn't a woman? no#do i feel pretty in a dress? yes#have i suffered? OH MY GOD YES#do i think any woman alive today has lived without suffering in these ways? NO.#unless she is being raised by wolves. in which case. good for her.#again I am still flabbergasted by that post having used trans woman as a last ditch effort scapegoat.#like. shocked. as if ANY trans girl's problems are because other women complain abt the way they're treated.#she's got her own problems bitch!! and they are directly correlated to my problems!!#it's like. it's infantilizing almost. the way the dickheads in that post went from ''kids'' to ''trans women''.#adult women who know how gender works.#condescending.
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I LOVE Teen Stan and Ford, it’s sad they don’t get drawn enough, so thank you so much!
Does Ford ever help Stan when he gets overstimulated? Or maybe when he has a rage response and suddenly starts crying and calls himself stupid?
Here's the other post with Ford
#I am once again asking someone to write me a fic about these two posts. pretty please 🥺#this took me way too long to think off#the dialogue was escaping me#if you can guess what the book he's reading is... you won't win anything I just think it would be cool#maybe Stan got upset about his grades. or a boxing match ir something#sometimes I too bite myself. not deep enough to draw blood but enough to bruise. it's gotten better over the tears but still#now and then...#anywayszzzzzzzz#ask#anonymous#gravity falls#stan pines#stanley pines#stanford pines#ford pines#teen stan#teen ford#art#fanart#traditional art#watercolor#the last few drawings came out so nicely#both of them are emotionally constipated in their teen years (and onwards honestly) so instead of addressing the crying they ignore it#they pretend it never happened#btw here you can see my (successful) attempt at putting Ford out of the picture so I don't have to draw more#comic#long post#look at their socks#I forgot the 's' in 'books' I'm so stupid god
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What did/do you like about Pharah?
Uh, gameplay-wise, I really love characters in shooters who rely on three-dimensional movement techs. Chaining together hover and jump to stay in the air for as long as possible and keep momentum is so satisfying, and picking enemies off from the sky made me feel like a bird of prey. I was a good Pharah main.
Story-wise, there unfortunately isn't much to canonically go off because Pharah is so underutilized and neglected. Her personality's pretty boilerplate "heroic hero" (she's literally inspired by Captain America).
But it's the crumbs/bits and pieces that I really latched onto. Pharah's a confirmed lesbian; her short story with Baptiste implies she harbors a crush on Mercy (fucking thank you.). She's biracial Egyptian/First Nations. She has major mommy issues, having grown up both admiring and resenting Ana. She's the bridge between Old Overwatch, inspired by the idealized heroes who surrounded her childhood, and New Overwatch. She's one of the only inter-generational characters in the cast; someone whose experiences span the gap, which is why I seriously believe Pharah would make a great main character.
There isn't much to go off of, though; she's a very uncomplicated character (she's a soldier for a private military corporation, lol.). But that just means she's a blank slate character, so I've seen fanfic writers run wild and create some really interesting takes on her. My favorite interpretation of her's a dense, herbo gym-bro type (a lot of her liens are about work outs, exercising, and playing sports) who's easily excitable under her seemingly self-serious, armored visage. We see how she tends to gloat and hype herself up when she's on a streak too, so Pharah definitely has a competitive and boastful side under her more professional and militant performance.
Now Mercy? Mercy is a real complex character.
#i was a diehard pharmercy shipper back then btw#the inherent homoerotic experience of pharmercy gameplay.#the homoerotic experience of looking to the skies to fly to safety under the protection of your knight in shining armor#the homoerotic experience of feeling white hot murderous rage at an enemy trying to pick off your pocket mercy#i still kinda despise gency lmao. you cannot convince me mercy would be in love with genji. at all.#he'd make her feel so uncomfortable and guilty. in my head. the canon is obviously different#gency is sexless. absolutely zero bite or tension.#i could go on about mercy and how her character has so much missed potential#i'm no longer in my overwatch fandom phase but#i still think about that new flirty line they added in ow2 where mercy goes “ahh you're like my knight in shining armor!”#and pharah goes “that's what i'm goin for ;)” and i sigh dreamily#really happy that pharah outright says she's a lesbian too but it's hard to feel good about rep when you know blizzard uses it for pr#to be honest i'm willing to bet cash that blizzard's keeping pharmercy in their back pocket as ammo for the next controversy#last year we already saw logs about pharah fretting and taking care of mercy and the two talking about how good it is to see each other#tbh pharah has the same energy/demeanor as applejack. cheerful and competitive in a can of whoopass#but yeah overall pharah's a pretty shallow character. i have IDEAS on how i'd go about deepening her but. whatever#that's sorta what happens when you have to juggle a cast of 40 characters. a lot get left with the bare minimum#ok so i wrote this entire post up saying that pharah isn't in ow2's storymode when she is. she's in the story i just. forgot#because she doesn't do or contribute anything interesting#ok i'm stopping here. overwatch's story is such an interesting narrative mess i could go on for hours#i dunno how you come up with such incredible character designs and give them such an unincredible story#it's also so so so interesting seeing the conflicting takes on characters the writers have#mercy in gameplay and voicelines is peppy and cheerful and optimistic#but mercy in the storymode journal logs is tired. jaded. a total shut in who forgets to leave her room and social#and YES! THAT'S WHAT I WANT!!! THAT'S MERCY TO ME!!! THE DOCTOR WHO FORGETS TO TAKE CARE OF HERSELF#ask me#anon
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phinktober day 8: tatinof
wtf a whole week done already???? i haven’t drawn this consistently since i was in high school 😭
bonus bc idk when to stop
#again don’t love this one as much as the others but i’m settling into some semblance of a style finally and learning to work w that so#i’m pleased#and i’m actually quite impressed at my development already i was a sketch portrait artist for years i forgot how much i love sketch-style#think i’m getting a bit better w anatomy without being completely dependant on grids#hmm#anyway i have a headache from trying to get this done before midnight im gonna go have a cup of tea#and maybe water idk when last i drank water#art2 and craft2#dnp#dan and phil#phanart#daniel howell#amazingphil#dan howell#phil lester#tatinof#the amazing tour is not on fire#wait he was still dinof then#danisnotonfire#i feel like i’m missing a tag but idc i need a cone#FOR FUCKS SAKE I MEANT TO POST THIS 4 HOURS AGO AND LEFT THE APP AND NEVER PRESSED POST#AAAAAAAAAA whatever it’s still tuesday somewhere
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A spy... An assassin... this is so exciting!!
#tangled#spy x family#rapunzel#eugene fitzherbert#loid forger#yor forger#crossover fanart#I finally remembered my tumblr password lol#I think it's been literally years since I posted on here wow#Last time I was here I was a mere med student#and now I am a full fledged doctor#It's crazyyyy#dont have time to draw anymore#:(#I did this months ago before I even started working#forgot about it#found it again#so voila#I've been mad busy tho so will probs disappear for another few years#But i might get back into doing fanart again cuz tidying this one up to post was therapeutic af#I need that kinda relaxation ya know#anyway#anyone still a Tangled fan anymore#Or have we all moved on now#if anyone is out there please send me a signal!#Also when is Spy x family coming back someone tell me#I want more of itttt#I miss my weekly dose of loid forger#I drew Pascal as Anya but he just felt out of place so I took him out I'm sorryyy#Maybe I'll post him separately
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I just started a new semester, and I'm finally getting the chance to take Malayalam, which I've been trying to do since my undergrad. This is obviously a very exciting development, and it's so delightful to be in a language class again for the first time in ages, but it's also been a very unique experience as far as language classes go. First of all, for me, who is generally used to having very odd personal connections to a language and being the overachieving linguist of the class. And second of all because it's just a very different experience to be in a class largely oriented towards heritage learners and people with some cultural familiarity.
There are five people in the class. Of those five, four have Malayalee family and have had some exposure to Malayalam throughout our lives; the last person is a native speaker of another non-Dravidian South Asian language. Of the four of us who are Malayalee, I'm basically the only one who didn't have a significant amount of Malayalam at home growing up. What this means is that we've spent very little time on the phonetics of the language, because everyone roughly knows how to pronounce it - something which wouldn't be true if there were non-South Asian in the class! (It was a bit comforting to hear all the other Malayalees struggling with aspirated consonants, which have constantly been the bane of my existence, and then to hear the instructor say that few people pronounce them right in spoken Malayalam anyways.) The instructor could ask us to say things on the first day, and the more fluent speakers could say them. There is already Malayalam being mixed in with the instruction. I'm sure by the end of the semester we'll be having extended conversations - especially since the two of us who don't speak have very concrete communicative desires for our outside lives.
It's also a very scary experience for me, personally. Or maybe scary isn't quite the right word, but I've always felt out of my depth in claiming Malayalee heritage - I've always felt that there were so many things which I didn't know which any normal Malayalee would. There is no evidence that this is true, at least insofar as that my cousins with two Malayalee parents have wildly varying experiences and I'm not actually that far outside the norm. In most American spaces, I will never be clocked as white, and most people usually immediately identify me as South Asian. Nonetheless, I know that when I visited Kerala this past December, I was decidedly foreign - to the two guys speaking in rapid-fire Malayalam on the flight from Qatar, to the person at the immigration counter in Trivandrum, even to my own relatives. Part of it is a mental block on my part, of feeling myself foreign and therefore never letting myself belong. Part of it is that I am, ultimately, American. But either way, in this class, I can feel that I'm the American in the room, even when I'm not, even when my pronunciation is just as good as the other Malayalees and there's nothing that's telling me I can't belong. I keep freezing up when asked to say real things, or when people speak to me, because there's some unreachable standard in my brain of Not A Real Malayalee, and everything feels fraught and fragile. So maybe this semester will be about overcoming that.
It's still strange being in a language class where the instructor, on the first day, can look at you all and say, "You know why you're here, you want to be here, we all have a shared experience." But it's also a beautiful thing in its own way, and I'm really looking forward to taking on a language in this way. I love the structure and the logic of language, the puzzle of putting it together, the beauty of making friends in it and watching shows in it and listening to songs in it - but as I get older I find myself really reflecting on what it means to learn and to know a language. And sometimes those barriers to learning and to knowing are only in our minds, not in our worlds. Language is communication and connection, and I hope that Malayalam serves me to these two ends, even as it sometimes feels like a trial by fire at each word.
#it's really really lovely getting to study language again in a class setting i forgot how much i missed it#i've definitely been getting a lot more intentional about my language-learning in the last few years though#malayalam is always a challenge for me personally but i'm working on it and i think in that process it'll help me with other languages too#the more you dive into learning heritage languages though the more you realize that no one else feels like they're enough either#and there is beauty in that#anyways. i'll leave this at that. i do have some other malayalam material from my trip in december that i never posted#but we'll see if i ever manage to get around to that idk#malayalam:general
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max and i are closing in on launching [redacted sports rpf charity fest] and i am once again pondering how do i write "experience with writing form emails and manipulating google forms in ways no one has dreamed of" in a cover letter without saying "i did it for the rpf grind"...like there's no way unless everyone in this microsoft teams meeting gets really cool about a bunch of stuff really quickly. you know
#IT LITERALLY CAME UP WHILE I WAS WRITING A COVER LETTER A COUPLE WEEKS AGO#AND IT WAS SUCH A BAD COVER LETTER BC IT WAS LIKE. I CAN DO THIS. I CAN BE A VIRTUAL PROGRAMMING MANAGER#I JUST CAN'T EXPLAIN HOW I CAME BY THESE SKILLS!!!!#i did not get an interview lmao. but we stay silly#like how do u frame ''community organizer'' when you're organizing. people on the internet to create rpf fanworks. for charity#lmaooooo oh well#me and max locking down our timeline last night and i'm like 😶 the thing i have wanted to do for years is finally happening#the universe tried to smite us multiple times in multiple ways. but we persisted. and it is happening!!!#last night i had to go to the grocery store at 9pm wearing short-shorts and an oversized t-shirt bc i was really like#if i don't get a coke in me right the fuck now i am going to end it all#procured coca-cola. drank it in the parking lot. recovered instantly. got on here and started posting#went to monday night service. last one bc after this week it'll be too late at night in est :(#it was such a nice global community to be apart of. people in 5 countries on four continents showed up almost every week!#not to be christian on main. but i love working with ecumenical organizations because i meet people all over the world#who have different ways of doing church and different interpretations of scripture and different takes on faith#and i always learn so much from people! good and bad lol sometimes it's like wow i will NOT be integrating that into my worldview#yo just under one week until i move 😵💫 i decided i am packing one (1) more box and then saying fuck it we ball#whatever i forgot has to go in the car. i cannot let myself be owned by cardboard boxes any longer#and soon. freedom. new start. new beginnings. someone said ''i hope you look at this as a time of new growth and unfolding'' to me#and i went man. i think i am#like the pine trees that reseed after a forest fire#fresno oilers.txt
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・┆✦ʚ♡ɞ✦ ┆・venus retrograde reflections ・┆✦ʚ♡ɞ✦ ┆・
with the amount of planets currently stationed retrograde, a lot of us may be feeling quite overwhelmed and stuck in our own heads. when a planet goes retrograde, it tends to cause us to look heavily inwards. retrogrades are about reflecting, specifically reflecting on the themes that planet is connected to. this post is focused on venus retrograde. venus connects heavily to two themes especially: relationships (romantic, platonic, familial and self) and finance.
journal prompts, or general questions to ponder during this period:
who in my life makes me feel energized, supported, seen? why?
who in my life leaves me feeling drained, upset? why?
how do i currently speak to myself? would i speak to a loved one the way i speak to myself? why or why not?
how am i taking care of myself currently and ensuring my own needs are met? am i truly showing up for myself every single day?
am i balancing a healthy amount of time between nourishing my relationship with myself, as well as my external relationships?
are my current relationships supportive/aligned with who i am becoming, and where i want to go? do i feel encouraged, or held back, by those in my life?
are there any relationships i question continuing? why or why not? what would improve by ending the relationship? what would i miss, if anything?
how can i improve the way i treat myself? how can i show myself more love and care?
am i showing up in my friendships? am i giving my friends the care and support they deserve? is there anything i should change in regards to the way i handle my friendships, and interact with my friends?
how would you define a healthy relationship? what are your major needs in a relationship (platonic and/or romantic)? are these needs being met by those in your life?
how am i currently managing my finances?
what could i do to improve my financial situation? what good financial habits could i adopt?
how does my living space make me feel? does it bring comfort? if not, what can i do within my means to make the space more for me?
what are my greatest values in life? am i living in a way that aligns with these values? am i embodying these values? are my relationships supportive of my values?
#astrology#journal prompts#retrograde#venus retrograde#luna.txt#loosely based off my virgo szn post from last year hehe#this retrograde is the most reflecting i've ever done i swear#i had another journal prompt i wanted to add to this#and i swear it was so good. and i forgot it before i finished typing another prompt im so sad#if i remember it/think of more i'll add them </3#mine
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I wanted to draw smth LNY related for Qijiu but ended up just drawing Bunny Mafia (roleplay) in a hurry The wife’s the 2nd boss
man, bunny suits are great
BONUS:
what actually came around
#qijiu#svsss#mxtx#shen jiu#yue qingyuan#honestly kinda surprised i forgot to post it here oops#i did so on twitter ages ago#ah well#hard to keep tabs on my art because theres juts so much qijiu in it#i ve to double check whether iposted too#so much work#well hten agian who cares if i repost right#lol#sometimes i wonder how much qijiu ve drawn by now#it must be#so much man#i remember counting i think#last year?#and it was like already 140 ish smsth or so#countain multi image works as one too#so i probably long have hit 200 easily#anyway this is the last one so cya in idk#3 weeks#or longer#lolol
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I occasionally wish to reach out to old friends/acquaintances I haven't spoken to since high school/some other even earlier time in my life, but I have SOOO little social energy even for required tasks (like making dr phone calls or etc), I never have any leftover for extra ones, and it would be very odd to message someone I haven't spoken to in like 5 years out of the blue but then take 4 entire months to respond back lol.. My natural curiosity with nostalgia/collecting details of the past/etc. (literally if I were born a little earlier I would definitely do scrapbooking or something lol) is very strong, but, alas, not strong enough to beat out the Social Issues Demons apparently
#facebook always does that 'here's a post from this day 8 years ago' thing. and I see old comments interacting#with people and it's so like.. OOOOO~~ where are they now?? what's going on? how much have they changed as people?#how much are they the same? this is fascinating. i should contact them!!' but then it's like... take that to it's logical conclusion though#you would contact them and then IF they even responded it would take you 80 years to respond and then they would#think there was something wrong or that you were trying to be insulting or something. To contact anyone I need to include an 85 page#disclaimer of all of my social issues & mental illness things. 'If i take 3 weeks to reply I promise it has nothing to do with u' etc lol#THIS is why more people need to be into phone calls/voice calls/some form of audio real time communication/etc.#I think one of the main things that's hard about messaging through text for me is it's so unscheduled and open ended#(plus it takes forever if you're talking about anything in detail and gets very long very quickly)#because like you can send a message and then just get a reply whenever. and then you're expected to reply back whenever#so it's like you never know when the response will come or when a new obligation to reply can come up? so it's like this sudden thing with#no outline?? if that makes sense. whereas a phone call is very like 'hello let's schedule a call from 10am - 2pm on thursday'. And you know#EXACTLY when the interaction will start and EXACTLY when it will end and you can plan around it in your schedule easily.#I have the reverse thing of a lot of people (how people don't pick up phone calls/hate calls/only text)#I would literally talk on the phone with a stranger. I would have a discord voice chat with someone I barely know.#if someone I hardly even remember from elementary school asked to have a voice call with me out of nowhere I would do it.#but if a stranger MESSAGED me?? or someone I barely know sent me a TEXT or something?? I will never reply probably#It's just too vague and weird. and you can't read voice tone over text. and the interaction could last forever with no clear end#point and etc. etc. But a call is like. set. established. clear boundaries. you can read the flow of conversation better. rapport. etc. etc#I get that I guess people feel more anonymous or distanced over text?? but you can have fake phone numbers on the computer. or do like disc#rd calls. or zoom without a camera or etc. etc. Also the distance that's present in text is BAD distance because it just means that tone is#not conveyed properly and you will never truly get a sense of the person's conversational vibe or mannerisms or how well you really click.#ANYWAY ghgjh...... I'm so so so interested in concepts of like.. How did that one kid I used to talk to in elementary school#but then they moved away in 5th grade - how did they end up? what are they doing now?? etc. etc. Like despite the severe social anhedonia#and general lack of connection with others I'm just really fascinated in like.. idk. the human development of it all and like#the concept of how we're actually a million different people through the course of our lives ever evolving in different iterations and etc.#PLUS again. i love nostalgia. sometimes old peple you know might remember a shared memory or can tell you about something you forgot#or etc. like it's SUCH A COOL THING in CONCEPT but I am too socially inept generally speaking lol. which people I still talk to today are#familiar with my 'phone call once every few months' communication style. but strangers would just be like... wtf. And I don't blame them#Sure I literally cannot change the physical health + brain issues i have - but also I know enough to not put others through that lol
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KISS KISS FALL IN LOVE
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Touch
Some Vetvimes for y'all~
Discworld © Terry Pratchett / art © Murderous-Coffeebean (tumblr & dA)
#vetvimes#discworld#havelock vetinari#lord vetinari#sam vimes#vimes#art#fan art#discworld fanart#my art#my posts#digital art#Touch#2024#22.5.2024#i haven't drawn much recently (sad sigh) and the whole ghost merch shirt sitch has had me unwilling to post much art ever since#but the discworld fandom is alright so i guess i'll make an exception#anyway thanks magpiesketchins if you see this i love your discworld comic and it actually inspired me to draw sth for these idiots (affecti#*(affectionate) again#also lol idk abt the anatomy here and like. vetinari's hand. but after years of stressing abt art i post i can finally shrug and move on. y#anyway the second one could be sad if you wanna but i think it's more vimes being followed by his thoughts or memories or sth#also this vetinari isn't 100% how i want him to look like yet but this vimes? that's my vimes design. this one i am 100% happy with#edit: nearly forgot this in my drafts woops#anyway#happy glorious 25th of may#unfortunately i haven't had time to make sth like last year so i hope this suffices#it's not my fave piece ever but i'm v happy with vimes so whatever
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✨🪐🐔🪐✨
#realized i never posted sowoozoo chicken hat poodle tae#when i tell yall i was so obsessed with sowoozoo chicken hat poodle tae#this painting is like 3 yrs old and one of my first bts drawings but i think hes still cute 3:#a drawing lasting 3 years without me starting to hate it at some point is kinda unprecedented in the ant book#but also theres one hair strand i forgot to render and ive always been too lazy to go back n fix it. haunts me a bit#taehyung#bts#bts fanart#taehyung fanart#th#my art
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Mini Silverborn Countdown
If you’ve been around for a few years, you’ve seen me vaguely mention a “Silverborn Countdown Challenge” several times. It’s been delayed and changed as many times as the book itself, lol.
If anyone wants sort of a low-stakes, very chill and spaced out version of this ye olde never tackled challenge to complete in the next year before Silverborn, I propose what I’m doing:
Every 3 months leading up to the initial release, I am creating one thing based on each of the books.
January — Nevermoor
April — Wundersmith
July — Hollowpox
#nevermoor#nevermoor fanart#nevermoor fanfic#silverborn#silverborn countdown challenge#thank you theo for reminding me to post abt this on here. I am stealing the “mini” moniker (?) in return. lol.#this was in my drafts and I forgot to post it. happens a lot lol.#anyways if you’re reading this happy new years !#nine masterpost ver 1.0 dropping tomorrow evening prob bc I have had a headache all day and that’s the next time I’m free#now time to sleep. zzzzzz. perhaps I’ll have a prophetic silverborn dream. who knows.#I love giving myself set times to draw nevermoor things or just think about the series bc otherwise I go insane#literally thinking abt this stuff 24/7 it’s all I want to draw. But then I have to hold myself back + then end up never drawing anything lol#I have three big things planned for this like big pieces to work on over awhile and get myself out of my comfort zone#but idk what to draw for this first one. aahhhhh. excited for wundersmith and hollowpox though.#also I want to do a little animation for nevermoorian new years. which is on a leap day this year! how fun!!#I have an eternal nevermoor to-draw list that only gets bigger#sorry to the person that requested some Christmas stuff last year. I missed out and was gonna do it this year. then no time. so next year? 😅#also 🏆 to anyone that ever reads my ramblings in my tags. I am so insane about nevermoor especially. <333
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