#i think i also only recently thought to think about my childhood at all and realize most of it was really fucked up
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AITA for calling my SIL a bitch?
For context, I(NB) married my husband(M, who I'll call N) after a while of knowing each other, but a very short romantic relationship. He is the middle child of five, between his sibling (NB, the SL of the title), a brother(M, called K) and then a sister(F, called H) and brother(M/NB, called L).
None of them are related by blood, but all's parents were part of some secret society that decided to murder their children. SIL escaped and managed to save the other four before calling the cops. That's not important. What is important is that they started a company together, and it is quite big. The other three have their own side careers, but SIL and N's life is this company. As a result of that, they are quite close, with N freely admitting that SIL is his favorite sibling.
However, N decided to start his own company, based on a few ideas he had about running the main company. I was one of the first hires, which is how we met. And while it's still fairly young, it is rising rather quickly, to the point that it has stolen some clients from the main.
N has apologized for this, but over the years, there has been a noticeable distance between him and his siblings. N has told me that it felt like this for much longer, with K terrified when N developed a childhood interest of becoming a mortician.
One of the things is a party to celebrate the day that SIL was awarded the adoption of the other four. It is rarely the actual anniversary, but a day close to it, due to everyone's schedules. In recent years, N has felt like he has been deliberately kept from joining, with the party scheduled some time he couldn't make it. I have heard him have to turn it down, and he always sounds so sad, even when SIL offers a private dinner afterwards to celebrate. He keeps a stiff upper lip in public, but I have found him crying in private.
To add more, SIL and I have never really gotten along. N suspects this is because of two things: 1. SIL and I are rather alike, sharing a manipulative streak and a hunger for power(yes I will admit to this) and 2. N is also SIL's favorite. He was the first they saved and SIL raised him from a baby. SIL thus feels a possessiveness over N, to the point to where they actually tried to bribe me into leaving him when we announced our engagement.
Now, this year, I suggested that we have a company party to celebrate the anniversary of our company. N agreed and even suggested that we include a wedding part, since most of the staff couldn't attend our wedding. I agreed.
And then the invitation to the adoption anniversary came and N turned it down, since we will be busy getting things ready for our party, and did so rather quickly becausehe had a meeting to attend. The fact that he sounded happy about it and then just hung up I think threw SIL off, because they called me to understand.
The adoption anniversary party has been scheduled at a time N could make. We would only be looking at a few party venues that morning. I explained, however, that we had made plans that day to work on other things, so we would be busy.
SIL got annoyed and pointed out that it had taken so much lifting to find a time that N could make. I pushed back with the fact. that the effort had not been made before and we ended up having a loud argument about it.
(It was loud enough that security ended up being called because someone on the lower level thought I was being attacked.) There was a lot of accusations thrown at screaming level and I think SIL was actually upset- they don't yell, they think it's a waste of oxygen.
And then I called them a bitch.
Now, I have called SIL a bitch. In private, with just N or his sons and his friend. I have called them a bitch around their own siblings, when they won't tell SIL what I said. I know they call me insults in private as well. However, we have never actually insulted each other in conversation before. It feels like a line.
They went quiet and I think I panicked.
I ended up hanging up and texting N.
By the time we got home, we had been bombarded with calls and texts. The other three had been informed. It was a range of insults towards us and pleadings to please talk, with SIL only trying to reach out twice to N. Once in a text, the second in a voicemail, both rather calm, except in the voicemail, it sounded like they had been crying. Not because of the insult, but of some other stuff I said about their dynamics.
N thinks I responded naturally. He is not the biggest fan of the fact that I insulted them, but he thinks they had it coming, with the party and everything else, even the attempted bribery. As he stated:
"I expect one day that I will open the news to find out that one of you murdered the other and set the entire city on fire to do so." Also, "Yes, of course I would bail you out if you did."
I don't know how to feel.
#Reddit fic#my writing#COTL#COTL AU#Cult of the Lamb#Cult of the Lamb AU#Au#Narilamb#Shamura#The Lamb
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DREAMS AND SHIFTING
no one asked for this, but I love both dreaming and shifting and I wanted to make a post of how I have used dreaming to help with my shifting journey. So welcome to me yapping about mostly dreaming.
Before we start, shifting is first a personal journey and happens instantly and once you decide it happens. This is also from my personal experience and stand point with this already.
first starting with some personal insight
I remember seeing this post it was more recently (I've been really using dreams to help guide with my shifts for years) which said something about how when you dream about your chosen reality your already there - something along those lines (currently it is 6am as i write this so I canât remember exactly) I literally read that and loved it instantly, and for me it made a lot of sense.
I have done my fair research on dreams, and myself I am a vivid and avid dreamer. I also lucid dream quite frequently but more in the way of being to control and think in situations rather than flying around and creating portals.
While dreams arenât exactly a clear topic of discussion, or at least said so by my research, we can discover that our dreams can stem from memories, experiences and our physical, mental and emotional state. They can also stem from subconscious thoughts and desires. When we start paying attention to our dreams it can be quite helpful in decision making. And literally why I will always tell people to keep a dream journal.
In a recent post, I said that I have used my dreams to help guide me with shifting. Which I thank a lot to a certain deck of dream ritual oracle cards (I knew they were calling for a reason). In my opinion, when you believe or assume something is going to work for you it will - technically LOA
my own dreams - and their insight to my journey
Like i said earlier, I have used dreaming a lot to help with my shifting journey, more to get an insight or just to have fun dreaming about everyone. I recently dream a lot about my fame reality as currently thatâs where I am shifting too, and after reading the post like I said. A lot of things started to make more sense to me. Why would I be dreaming about my fame reality, if I'm not already there?
Yes of course, when we script we have this foundation, an insight for our chosen reality. Which can help guide our dreams subconsciously. However for me personally, I donât dream about the stuff I have scripted. I am here dreaming about places that I have never attended in this waking life but I know I have in my fame reality life. As already said your dreams stem from memories and different states. Also about 80% of these dreams I have are vivid and crazily long.
Iâve dreamt about going to the oscars or childhood homes in my fame reality which now I only have the memory off as I fairly just didnât script anything about it. I have also been dreaming a lot from the perspective of my fame reality self. Which still for me I am like âwell I am having these vivid dreams, where I am my fame reality self in places only she would recall going tooâ which makes me think back to the post. So this is why I sort of started to use my dreams to help guide me with my shifting journey.
how I use my dreams to help with my shifting journey
like I have already said, I had brought these dream ritual cards that in the guidebook had a dream ritual for all of the cards, and honestly as someone who loves dreaming they have helped me a lot. (I also loved that one of the rituals was about an alternative reality).
One of these cards was Foresee and the ritual was precognitive dreaming. And this is really where I was like âI can use this for my shifting journeyâ. So I did it, for I think a week straight I affirmed that I was going to dream about things that I can use for my journey or which can guide me to shift. I made a section in my dream journal just for these specific dreams and in the end I picked apart all my dreams to see what it was telling me.
What my dreams eventually told me, was that I was too focused on being in control, and forcing myself to stop doing stuff, and since then Iâve sort of had a change of mind. Iâve been learning to let go and allowing things to just go with the flow. With the change of mindset, Iâve shifted a few times quite recently.
overall:
I personally found dreaming to help with me with my shifts have in fact been a very positive impact in my journey. I went through a frustrating period in my journey and now Iâm finally calm, and back at peace with it all.
If you were looking for a new thing, maybe this could be it. But remember this is your journey and whatever you want to happen will.
(i apologise if thereâs any spelling errors or if sentences dont make sense. I wrote this as it came to me when I woke up at 5:30am, and wrote this between 6-9am đ)
#reality shifting#shiftblr#shifting community#desired reality#reality shifter#shifting blog#shifting realities#shifting motivation#venusshiftsx#loassumption#dreaming#lucid dreaming#dreams#dream research
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Problems guy part 200
#hoof draws#hoofology#sorry for all the weird vent comics lately i've been going thru it#i think i also only recently thought to think about my childhood at all and realize most of it was really fucked up#kid who has to be ready to talk their parent down from the ledge at all times --> emotionally crippled adult who hates life pipeline#the colors in this are fucking wack !!
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model cowboy
đ starring. Jeong Jaehyun x afab!Reader
đŽ preview. You maintain eye contact until the moment your lips meet, and then, you do your best to just relax, to forget about the cameras pointed at you. You allow yourself to melt into the kiss, following Jaehyun's motions, following the gentle notes that soon become more heated. His tongue swipes against your bottom lip, and on instinct, you open your mouth for him, wrapping your arms around the back of his neck to pull him closer. You try to convince yourself that youâre leaning into this for the sake of the scene, that youâre just being good actors together, but thereâs something underneath it all. Thereâs a desperation. You can almost taste it below the spearmint on his tongue.Â
tw/cw. unprotected sex, dry humping, breast worship, slow and adequate foreplay/pussy stretching/prepping, pussy eating, fingering, praise, slight switchy power dynamic but Jae is generally the dom/top, slight overstim, face riding, slight hair pulling, precum (jae is horny), dirty talk, sappy sex, alcohol, etc⌠I pet names: (hers) superstar.
đšÂ rating.18+ explicit I wc. 13.2k
đ aus.actor!Jaehyun, singer!y/n, fake dating au, enemies to lovers au, etcâŚ
âď¸Â mlist + an. it was actually so fun to have small clips of TMZ style gossip reporting- loved that I was able to try different things with this fic :)
Prologue
In this week's news, our favorite kids' show alumni are back on the scene together. Beloved model and actor Jung Jaehyun teams up with childhood costar (y/n) (l/n) for her new single Model Cowboy. This song will mark the kick-off of her third album, and the music video is set to start production sometime early next month, with the song coming out on iTunes and other streaming platforms sometime in the new year.
Thereâs a lot of buzz on social media about this pairing, as the two stars were âshippedâ incessantly in their teen years, with one user commenting, âItâs like Britney and Justin Timberlake all over again! Ah!!!!!â
While Jaehyun has had a string of relationships over the years, our favorite girl power singer y/n has only recently ended a long-term relationship with football player Lee Jeno. When asked how this separation would affect her new album, y/n had this to say: âI want to draw on the pain of a breakup because that feeling is so universal, but at the same time, I want the album to be fun. Itâs about ending one cycle, and sure, giving yourself the space and grace to mourn that loss, but also looking forward at the future and other opportunities that come your way when you go through something like that.â
When asked about the new single Model Cowboy, y/n noted, âItâs about going back to your roots and finding that cowboy, blue-collar man. I think the trades are kind of in vogue right now, for all of the best reasons. We want salt of the earth, we want a man who will provide and take care of us- not everything is luxury and partying. Thereâs such peace in stability, and I want to honor the simplicity of good relationships, which we all deserve to experience.â
Despite all of this, when our reporters enquired about Jaehyun as the star of the music video, who, to us and many fans on social media, doesnât scream âsalt of the earth, cowboy, or stabilityâ our singer simply responded with âNo comment.â
Yikes.
However, there may be hope for this fan-favorite couple yet. When Jaehyun was asked about his role in the music video at a recent film premiere for his new action movie âHome Grownâ he had this to say: âI did a few music videos in my early twenties, but never with anyone I really knew or admired. Iâve been focused on movies and fashion recently, but Iâm excited to do a shorter-form art piece. y/n and her team are very creative, and I canât wait to see the finished result.âÂ
I can safely say that we canât wait either.
Back when y/n was just eighteen, putting out her first album, there was one song that everyone thought she wrote about Jaehyun. We couldnât help but bring this up to the actor. When questioned if heâd inspired y/nâs first hit single, âForget About Himâ, Jaehyun said, âThatâs not for me to say, youâll have to ask her.â This response revived years of conspiracy on social media, and weâre all still itching for the truth.
Production for Model Cowboy is set for the end of the month, and permits have been granted for shooting in Californiaâs Joshua Tree National Park. Weâll all be on the edge of our seats waiting for promo pictures and behind-the-scenes photos.Â
Stay tuned for all things celebrity drama and news on our website, or follow us on Instagram and Snapchat for daily updates.Â
One:
Youâre in your trailer with your assistant, Mark, waiting for your call time, and you canât help the irritation thatâs filling you. Itâs the first day of shooting for Model Cowboy, and every other time youâve filmed a music video, youâve been excited about the creative journey of turning a song into a visual expression- but not today, and thereâs one huge reason for your angst.
âI still canât believe this is happening,â you groan. âJaehyun wasnât my first choice for this, and heâll never be my first choice for this- it takes away from the meaning of the song to have him starring with me!â
Mark frowns. âI mean, heâs not exactly a model cowboy-â
âMore like a model pretending to be a cowboy,â you scoff.Â
Your assistant sighs. âManagement just wants you two to do this, fake date for a while, promote your music and his upcoming projects, draw intrigue-â
âI know itâs what management wants, I was forced to sign the contract,â you snap. Then you release a breath, getting control of yourself. This isnât Markâs fault, in fact, he argued your side in the meeting about this two months ago. âI just⌠Iâm not a huge fan of Jaehyun.â
âYou always said he was the most overly confident, smug, pretty boy that came out of your kidsâ show,â Mark nods. Heâs very good at summing up your difficulties, as heâs your most trusted confidant. Youâd never dream of being vocal about your personal opinions of Jaehyun to anyone else, your PR training has taught you not to be fully honest, to prioritize your reputation as a âgood girlâ- but Mark, he gets you.Â
âAt the end of the day,â you sigh, âsure, Jae might be a better actor, but Iâm the better singer.â
âI know you wonât want to hear this-â
âThen donât say it.â
Mark sends you a pointed look. âHe did do that cover of âI Like Me Better When Iâm With You,â and everyone loved it.â
âWell, Jaehyun doesnât have three albums and a Grammy. He did a cover. Itâs not like thatâs difficult.âÂ
Before Mark can say anything else, thereâs a knock on your trailer. You jump up, ready to start the day of shooting, but when you open your door, itâs not a PA standing there to take you to location, itâs Jaehyun.
Heâs dressed in a cowboy-style outfit, however, itâs more runway than practical, and heâs also wearing the same smug smile he always used to have on when you were working together as kids and young adults.
âLong time no see,â Jaehyun muses.Â
You roll your eyes. âDonât pretend youâre happy to see me.â
You know your dislike for Jaehyun is shared with his own disdain for you, and youâd noted that to your managers. How are either of you going to pretend to be in love when this general dissatisfaction with each other is evident every time youâre in the same room?
âThought Iâd come to discuss the whole fake dating script with you, you know, kind of like running lines.â
âThere arenât any lines for our fake dating scenario yet, itâs improv,â you remind him.
âThen, how about boundaries?â
You release a groan. âFuck it, letâs go find my PA, get in a car to go to location, and we can talk during the drive.â
Two:
Thereâs a tension in the SUV. With you on his left, your assistant behind you, and Jaehyunâs own manager, Johnny, behind him, everything anyone says will be noted. In fact, Jaehyunâs been listening to Johnny argue on the phone about a brand deal for the past ten minutes.
Youâd said youâd discuss the whole fake dating thing, but instead, your eyes are glued to your iPad as you look over the music video notes.Â
Jaehyun has always found you to be a very focused woman, he might go so far as to say you have a stick up your ass. Your rigidity is a stark contrast to his own âgo with the flowâ type of way of doing things, and itâs one of the reasons youâd never gotten along well on sets.
When heâd come to your trailer to discuss PR lines, it had been because he was trying to meet you where youâre at. He thought youâd want to plan. In fact, heâd found it almost laughable when youâd told him it would be improv because out of the two of you, heâs the one thatâs always excelled in that area.Â
You have this face you put on for others, but Jaehyunâs always seen through it. You lack confidence in yourself, and thatâs why you overcompensate by being anal about details, about practicing so you never fail when the time comes.Â
Jaehyun leans closer to you, getting a look at the music video notes. The aesthetic board is very desert, horses, sand, sparkles, disco balls, and mirrors- for someone who said Model Cowboy was about finding someone who wasnât all luxury, there are definitely luxury items in the music video notes.Â
âSo⌠tell me again what the songâs about?â Jaehyun asks.
You sigh. âMark sent you a sound clip, didnât he? Did you even bother to listen to the song?â
âYeah,â Jaehyun shrugs, âbut I wanted to hear the details from you.â
You take an exasperated deep breath, putting your iPad down on your lap. âItâs about falling in love with someone whoâs very salt of the Earth-â
âWhat do you mean by that?â
Your lips part in shock and annoyance. âIt means a man whoâs salt of the Earth.âÂ
âYeah, you said that, but likeâŚâ Jaehyun lets out a small laugh at how bad youâre fumbling this, âwhat does that mean, to you.âÂ
Mark shifts in the seat behind you, leaning forward to join the conversation. âIt means someone who is honest, and reasonable. Someone who doesnât think theyâre special or better than others.â
You flash Jaehyun a pointed look. âSo basically, not you.âÂ
Jaehyun chuckles. âBaby, neither of us are salt of the earth if thatâs your definition.âÂ
He can see how annoyed you are, can pick up the micro movements, the way your fingers are tapping on the edge of the iPad. Itâs a rhythmic thing, something you do to calm yourself, and heâd noticed that pattern in you when you were much younger.Â
âThis whole fake dating thing was not my idea,â you snap finally.
âYeah, wasnât mine either. We both have PR managers.â
You roll your eyes, letting out another exasperated sound of annoyance.Â
Jaehyun kind of likes poking at you like this. Heâd been worried that youâd be super anal about this whole project, and while youâre definitely fighting for control, he likes to jab you where your guard is down. It feels like a win to him, and deep in Jaehyunâs core, he knows itâs not a nice thing to do, but he simply canât help himself.
You have a history, years of interactions and bickering- he hasnât seen you in a long time, but getting on your nerves is as easy as itâs always been, and that schoolboy enjoyment from picking on you is as potent as it ever was.Â
Three:
Youâre a couple of hours into your day, and youâre doing some shots with horses now. Youâd chosen Hwasa as your director, sheâs a visionary in the type of aesthetic you want, and youâve worked with her numerous times before. Sheâs very girl power, which is what you love, and you also enjoy the fact that she sees this as a collaboration.
Youâve worked with male directors in the past who think your music video is about showing their vision, and in your early days as a teen, you hadnât been able to find your voice. Now, as an adult, you have the final say on everything, and Hwasa is the best partner you could think of for a project like this.
The two of you are by the cameras, making sure the shot will be good. The horses are just hanging out with their trainers, and Jaehyunâs a few meters away under the sun tent, waiting for direction.
âSo⌠Iâm thinkingâŚâ you look at Jaehyun, then at the saddles on the horses, âWhat if we try a shot with bareback.â
Hwasa casts you a sideways glance. âI mean⌠visually, I think that would be nicer, it would encapsulate freedom, but at the same time⌠is Jaehyun skilled enough to mount while bareback?â
âHeâs an actor isnât he?â You turn to look at Jaehyun. God, you canât wait for him to fall off the horse and eat shit. âJae!â
Heâs sitting in a chair, his head tipped back, cowboy hat obscuring his face. The sound of your voice makes him sit up, his fingers pushing the rim of the hat up so he can look at you.
âCome over here!â Hwasa calls.
He nods, standing then swaggering over to you. Heâs having way too much fun in his little cowboy outfit for your liking. âWhatâs up?â
âHow do you feel about trying this scene on bareback?â Hwasa asks.
Jaehyun looks at the two of you, then over at the horse. âWe can give it a go.â
You try to hide your smile, God, this is going to be so satisfying.
Hwasa goes to consult with the safety guys and trainers, who take off the saddle, then talk Jaehyun through how to mount a horse without the aid of stirrups. He nods nonchalantly, as smug as ever.
The scene gets ready, with you and Hwasa behind the camera. âAction!â she calls.
Jaehyun approaches the horse. He stops next to it, stroking itâs hair. You watch him get a gentle grip, and then, in one fluid motion, he hoists himself up, swinging his leg over the horseâs back before steadying himself into a seated position. He guides the horse by its hair to make a neat circle, looking like the most skilled cowboy ever, then he turns and flashes you that smug smile of his as Hwasa yells âcut!â
âThat was amazing,â Hwasa tells you. âGod, Jaehyun was such a good choice for this.â
âReally? How so?â you ask.
âJust, I know heâs not a stereotypical salt of the earth man. Heâs not all American, heâs not a cowboy with a five o'clock shadow- this⌠dichotomy of visuals versus lyrical interpretation, how any man can be the right man if given the chance, despite all these stereotypes-âÂ
You can feel your expression fall. Sometimes you hate how artsy Hwasa is, with her bachelor's in English and her way with words and interpretations. You canât argue with her analysis, because if thatâs what she gets out of the visual of Jaehyun flawlessly mounting a horse bareback, then thatâs her view of it.Â
âDo you want to try to mount bareback too?â Hwasa asks, drawing herself out of her musings to focus on the scenes she wants in the time allotted.Â
You release a sigh. âI guess we can give it a try.â
âIf itâs too dangerous-â
âIf Jae can do it, I can too,â you insist, not wanting to be one-upped by him.Â
Youâre in a long flowy silver dress with a slit up the thigh, and you remove your white overcoat. Jenni, your makeup artist double-checks you, and youâre handed your flashy disco-ball-styled cowboy hat.Â
The safety team and trainers give you a talk about how to mount the horse, and after listening carefully, you feel ready to take on the task.Â
Your horse is black, and your outfit is meant to be a contrast. Itâs a beautiful horse, and when Hwasa calls âAction!â you approach it carefully. You can feel your heart racing in your chest, and you stop next to the large animal, stroking it for a moment while you gain the courage to try to mount it.
As you make the leap, hoisting yourself up- Jaehyun calls out, âDonât slip!â
And of course, thatâs exactly what happens. Your leg canât get a grip over the horse, you trip up a little with the silky material of your dress, and just like that, youâre back on the ground with two feet, sending a death glare over your shoulder at Jaehyun.
âIt was a nice effort!â Hwasa encourages you.Â
âNot many people get it on their first try,â a trainer agrees.
You watch Jaehyun smile smugly, and an annoyance unlike any youâve ever experienced fills you as he meticulously watches you try to complete the scene.Â
Four:Â
Itâs near the end of your first day of filming. Hwasa had decided on a one day permit for the horses in the desert, opting to get all the scenes involving the large, beautiful animals done in one big go, and now, sheâs explaining the final shots she needs to you and Jaehyun.
âSo, weâre skipping through the linear timeline a little right now,â your director explains. âThis is one of the final shots of the music video, so weâre going to imagine that at this point, the two of you are completely in love.â You and Jaehyun exchange a look. âYouâre riding on horseback in the desert. We want bliss, joy, a comfortable kind of peace that comes when you can truly be yourself with another person, a freedom.â
She gazes pointedly at you and Jaehyun.
âI think we can manage,â you scene partner says, but thereâs an edge of hesitation in his voice.
âWeâre thinking âRideâ by Lana Del Rey, but instead of motorcycles, youâre on horses. Think about how effortless she looked, how devil-may-care,â Hwasa, ever the Lana Del Rey enthusiast, explains. âYou know her song âYoung and Beautiful?â Thereâs a line, âHot summer nights, mid July, when you and I were forever wild.â Do you guys have that?âÂ
You love that Hwasa enjoys poetic music, itâs one of the reasons youâd been so drawn to her when you wanted to shift out of your role as a child star turned pop icon. Hwasa had been adamant about the Lana Del Rey stylings that she wanted to influence âModel Cowboy,â the American Dream, wild and poetic love.Â
However, with all that said, youâd never imagined Lana Del Rey would be tainted by the imaginings of Jaehyun as your lover, and it leaves a sour taste in your mouth.Â
Youâve already gone over blocking, and Hwasaâs explained the drones and cameras set up to take the shots, so now, all thatâs left to do, is get through the day.
Jaehyun can tell youâre lost in thought, he can see the dissatisfied look on your face, but before he can call you on it, Johnny pulls him to the side.
âGood luck with this one,â Johnny muses, patting him on the shoulder. âAnd donât fall off your horse, youâve got to be in Milan in a couple of days for the big Prada show.âÂ
âYeah, yeah,â Jaehyun brushes his manager off. âIâve got this.â
âThatâs my little go-getter actor,â Johnny grins, having scored a goldmine when he landed Jaehyun as his client, despite being a very young and new manager in the industry. âBe the Model Cowboy you always wanted to be.â
Jaehyun takes a deep breath before joining you. âYou ready?â he asks.
âAs ready as Iâll ever be,â you sigh.Â
âOkay guys, weâre in love!â Hwasa bellows. âWeâve got this! And⌠action!â
Your expression immediately changes, suddenly, youâre grinning, in fact, youâre glowing. It takes a second for Jaehyun to follow your lead, but then, the two of you are playfighting and tickling, laughing like young lovers who are tasting what it feels like to have found their soulmate for the very first time.Â
Jaehyun knows the blocking, he knows when to wrap his arms around you after a few feet of chasing, when to lift you up and spin you as you laugh and gently kick. He knows when to set you down, going in for a kiss only for you to break free and dart to your horse, effortlessly swinging yourself up onto the black stallion and taking off.
Jaehyun is right behind you, mounting his own white horse and following.
He does his best to keep an easy going, loving expression, and at first, itâs a little difficult. But, as more seconds of the two of you riding through the desert go by, Jaehyun remembers the way he felt about you when you first met.
Youâd been just kids then. Two young teens still growing into your bodies, into your personalities. He remembers how beautiful youâd been, even then, how your smile had lit up the room, as it does now when you turn your head to look over your shoulder at him, making sure the distance between you is still correct.
Of course itâs correct, if you want to be anal, Jaehyun can be anal too, and heâs not going to give you any reason to nitpick after the day heâs had.Â
No, Jaehyunâs an actor. Heâs a professional.
In fact, heâs a Model Cowboy as he chases you through the desert on horseback.Â
God, the way youâre looking back at him- youâve really grown into your looks, and Jaehyunâs not making things up when he says youâre glowing. The golden hour sun is hitting you just right, and suddenly, Jaehyunâs heart is racing. He feels alive, he feels- as if this whole thing is real. He forgets the cameras for just a few moments, getting lost in the experience of being young, wild, and free, with you.Â
Something shifts inside of him, although, Jaehyunâs so enthralled with you that he canât quite pin whatâs just taken place.
The scene is over all too quickly, the two of you making your blocking mark at the bottom of one of the rocky cliff faces that litter Joshua Tree National Park. You slow your horse, coming to a stop, your expression falling.
Jaehyun feels his own smile drop as he stops next to you. He swallows thickly, not knowing quite what to say, so, he decides to note, âWow, your acting has really improved!â
He means it as a compliment, but your expression turns even more sour, and he knows heâs messed up.
âWell thatâs a back handed compliment if Iâve ever heard one,â you scowl.
âI-â Jaehyunâs words get caught in his throat, and he has to swallow a lump just to continue, âI meant it in a good way, I was trying to be nice.âÂ
âIf that was you trying to be nice, it makes sense why you canât keep a girlfriend for more than a month or so,â you snap.
Jaehyunâs chest hurts, and he stares at you in shock. Itâs all the more painful, because in some ways, what youâve just said is true. Heâs used to only dating models, people in the industry who arenât as successful as he is. Heâs only ever entered relationships where thereâs a power imbalance, and he supposes in a situation like that, any negative feedback could be biting- yet, itâs different with you.
Youâre the one with the power here, and itâs clear you wonât take any criticisms from him. You stand up for yourself, in a way no woman ever has around Jaehyun.
As he watches you lead your horse away, signaling the end of the interaction, Jaehyun realizes maybe he kind of likes that youâre very powerful in your own right. Maybe he likes a woman who can defend herself and doesnât just take what the world throws at her.
Maybe⌠just maybe, after all this time, he likes you.Â
Five:Â
The locations crew had found a really cool oldstyle cowboy motel for everyone to stay at. It had been relatively inexpensive compared to other filming location lodgings in the past, and renting the whole place, including the mess hall, for four days had been the obvious choice.
Youâre sitting with Mark and Hwasa, all three of you have trays of food from the buffet, but none of you are focused on eating. Hwasa has her iPad out, and sheâs going through the shots of the day with Mark. You remind yourself when you peak at the screen that thereâs still a lot of editing to do, but so far, itâs looking quite good.Â
Your stylist, Jenni, is also with you, and sheâs capturing the majority of your attention as she shows you pictures of the costumes set for tomorrow. Your long silver dress is being swapped out for a pink palette upscale cowgirl aesthetic, with Jaehyun in creams and blues to match the lighter blush colours.Â
You notice Jaehyun walk into the large dining area. He and his manager, Johnny, head straight for the food, and they tilt their heads together, thick as thieves out of ear shot.
When theyâre done filling their trays, they begin to head to a table, and thatâs when Hwasa calls them over. âRough shots,â she explains. âJae, you sit next to y/n and Iâll show you both some of the details.â
You flash Jenni a look, hating that she has to move over for the model to sit.
Jaehyun is awkward as he does so, apologizing to Jenni, which is his only saving grace.
When he settles, your shoulders are touching, and he leans closer to get a look at the iPad that Hwasa is holding. Hwasa doesnât show all the shots, just her favourites, and you have to admit, the visuals are stunning even before any editing for light and colour.
Then, Hwasa shows you all the footage from the last scene youâd shot, the one with you and Jaehyun playfighting then leaping on horses.
âThis is so good,â Hwasa tells you. âYou both look so natural on horses, the drone shots are perfect, and the golden hour? Stunning.âÂ
While all of that is true, youâre more focused on how in love you and Jaehyun look. Itâs weird to be seeing you and Jaehyun like this. Itâs almost out of body, or doppleganger realm, because how the heck did you manage to look so happy and in love with Jeong Jaehyun of all people?
You feel the actor shift next to you, and you get the sense that heâs uncomfortable with it as well⌠however, out of the two of you, he has way more experience on screen. You guess you shouldnât be shocked that he looks very much in love, he gets paid big money to sell those emotions.
âAnyways,â Hwasa sighs, ây/n, tomorrow morning, we shoot sunrise and into the afternoon, then Jaehyun, the latter half of the day is us at the ranch for some more âclassicâ cowboy scenes.â
âSounds good,â Jaehyun mumbles. With one last nod of appreciation, he stands up, and itâs as if he canât get to another table fast enough.Â
Six:Â
Theyâve been shooting Jaehyunâs cowboy scenes for a couple of hours when he notices your arrival on set. Youâre not in the pink costume heâd heard about you wearing this morning, and youâre not all dolled up either.
Youâre in a light jacket and jean shorts, a more relaxed look, and yet, youâre still stunning.
Youâre next to Hwasa, looking at camera angles and shots, and while you seem to be making a few notes to the director, Jaehyun appreciates that you arenât trying to micromanage him yourself.Â
Shooting continues for another hour, and Hwasa calls a short break so she can figure out what else needs to be done today while they have the ranch.
At first, Jaehyun just goes and grabs a water. Johnny is hyping him up, but the actor is hardly paying attention, his gaze focused on you instead.Â
Jaehyun canât help himself, he walks over to you. You look up from Hwasa like a deer in headlights, and something about it is very endearing. âCan I help you?â
âYeah, can I uh⌠talk to you for a sec?â Jaehyun asks.
âYou know what? Yeah, thatâs a good idea,â you nod, âcome with me.â
You grab his arm, dragging him away. Jaehyunâs a little confused as to where youâre taking him, and when he finds himself in the privacy of a secluded location behind his trailer, heâs even more confounded.Â
âUhâŚ.â he starts, wetting his lips.
âWhat did you need?â
âI was just⌠guess I was wondering what you were doing here? Didnât your shoot finish a couple of hours ago? Figured youâd be getting some rest at the motel.â
âItâs my music video,â you remind him. âAlso⌠management thought it would be good to let tabloids get some shots of us shooting today, thatâs why I pulled you over here, we allowed them the field of view to your trailer.â
âSo thatâs why you took me to such a secluded spot,â Jaehyun grins.Â
âItâs the only reason I touched your arm,â you retort.
âCareful, donât look so angry,â Jaehyun warns you, his hands reaching out to grab your hips and pull you closer. âWouldnât want to mess up your tabloid shots.â
You roll your eyes. âTabloid wonât be on the property till after your last take in an hour or so. Donât jump the gun, cowboy. After your next scene, you can be as much of a little model slut as youâd like.â
âYou think Iâm a slut?â Jaehyun asks, shocked that youâre talking to him in this way.
âAm I wrong?â
Jaehyun stands there for a moment, and then, he releases his grip on your hips. âGuess not.â
âSo, after youâre done the next scene, we come here, and see if we can pretend to like each other,â you instruct.Â
âWe just have to be as convincing as we were yesterday,â Jaehyun muses.
You open your mouth to respond, but then you shut it, and Jaehyunâs left wondering what you would have said for the next hour.
He wonders how far youâll let him take things, and part of him wishes youâd answered his question about boundaries yesterday. This feels like uncharted waters, and his heart is racing when he finally meets you behind his trailer again.Â
âOkay,â you sigh. âDo your worst.â
Jaehyun feels himself begin to salivate, and he swallows thickly. Thereâs no way heâll do his worst. His worst, would be throwing you against the trailer and having his way with you right here and now- asserting his dominance and seeing if you push back in any way- he suspects you like him more than you let on, after all, Jaehyunâs never met a girl he couldnât tame.
Lifeâs hard when you have a stunning face and a hot body to match.Â
Jaehyun reaches for your hips, pulling you closer. His skin is tingling with excitement. âIâm going to say something funny, and you should laugh,â he whispers.
You grin broadly, but the expression doesnât meet your eyes. âDepends on if what you say is funny or not,â you counter.Â
Jaehyunâs mind suddenly goes blank. His pick-up lines, his jokes- they all fly out the proverbial window. He doesnât know what to say, so instead, he begins to lean in-
You turn your head at the last second and Jaehyunâs lips graze past your cheek. Heâs a little taken aback at first, but he leans into it, reminding himself that youâd told him to improv. âIs this okay?â he whispers in your ear, still wanting to double-check with you although every fiber of his being is telling him to just do what he wants.
âItâs okay,â you respond, wrapping your arms loosely around the back of his neck. âYouâre the actor.â
For some reason, it feels like a compliment that youâre making the distinction between the two of you. Youâre right, heâs the actor, and youâre the Grammy award-winning singer.
His lips continue softly on your cheek, and then he adjusts, pressing kisses down to your throat. You shift in his embrace, tilting your head to the side to give him more access.
âJae-â you warn.
âJust a few more, for the tabloids,â he whispers, nuzzling into your neck moreso than kissing now.
You release a sigh, and with your chests pressed together, Jaehyun can feel your heart racing.
He wonders if you can feel his going a mile a minute too.Â
Seven:Â
You eat in your room with Mark, too shaken up by your interaction with Jaehyun earlier to dare enter the mess hall yourself.Â
âSo, I was just sent the tabloid pictures for final approval,â Mark sighs, joining you on the bed so you can see his phone. âTheyâll be up in the morning.â
âJust choose your favourites,â you murmur.
âUhâŚâ Mark blinks at you. âI really think you should look at them with me.â
You take a deep breath. âFine.âÂ
Shifting your gaze to Markâs phone, he scrolls through the shots, and you hate how natural they look. You and Jaehyun just look good together, and it sets your teeth on edge.
âThe cheek kissing is cute,â Mark says thoughtfully. âThe way youâre holding each other looks real.âÂ
It looks too real, in fact.
âIâm just happy we have opposing shoot schedules tomorrow,â you admit with another deep breath. You can see Mark side-eying you, and you hold up a hand before he can respond. âDonât say a word.âÂ
âItâs justâŚâ Mark struggles at times to surpass your commands. Heâs your assistant first and foremost, but your company also expects him to have somewhat of a managerial role over you, and you know itâs a fight for him to find balance at times. âEveryone has shipped the two of you since you were younger. People say itâs like Britney and Justin in the Mickey Mouse Club House show- then you were teenagers, and you went different directions-âÂ
âWell, Britney and Justin didnât end up together, did they?â Itâs a rhetorical question, and from the way Mark sighs, he knows it.
âYouâre missing the point,â he struggles.
You turn your gaze to him. âAm I?â
Mark releases a breath, dropping the issue. You feel bad shutting him down like this, but at the same time, you donât want to open the can of âJaehyunâ worms, if you will. No, youâd much rather ignore it for right now.
Youâre filming a music video for your new album, and you have much bigger fish to fry.Â
Eight:Â
If Jaehyun wasnât needed for business calls with Johnny today, he might be on set watching you, and Jaehyun canât get it out of his head as he chills in his motel room and listens to his manager working.
Itâs three hours into calls and details before Johnny is able to take a break, and he sets down his phone with a pointed look on his face. âYouâre being weird.â
âAm I?â Jaehyun lets out a small laugh, but thereâs little humor in it.
âTalk to me,â Johnny says lightly, giving an air of friendship despite the fact that heâs still in his role as manager. âTalk to me about this whole PR, fake dating thing.âÂ
Jaehyun shrugs. âWhatâs there to talk about?â
âThose fake tabloid pictures of you and y/n from yesterday on set dropped an hour ago, theyâre trending on Twitter,â Johnny points out.
âItâs called âXâ now, actually.âÂ
Johnny narrows his eyes. âIâm never going to call it âX.â Itâs fucking Twitter.âÂ
Jaehyun canât help but laugh, for real this time. He loves Johnny, loves him for all of his little millennial quirks.
âHonestly?â Jaehyun sighs, feeling his energy sift again. âY/Nâs super uptight, but⌠she can act like sheâs not, and thatâs a different side of her that I wasnât really expecting.âÂ
Johnny is quiet for a few moments. âCan I ask you something?â
âGo for it.â
âThat song from her first album, âForget About Him,â was that written about you? Is there a past here?â
âNah, it wasnât about me,â Jaehyun assures his manager. âAs far as I know, sheâs never been interested in me like that. We had this other costar, Haechan-â
âLee Donghyuck?â
âYeah, him. They uh, I think there was something there between them, for a little while at least.â
Jaehyun can feel Johnnyâs assessing gaze, and he averts his own eyes.Â
âIt almost seems like youâre jealous, Jae.â
âYeah, well, Haechan never went on to become a brand ambassador for Prada or star in movies, he was just some little child star.â Jaehyun can taste the bitterness in his words, but he canât help himself.Â
âYou know whoâs not just a child star?â Johnny asks. âY/N. You two are, without argument, the most successful people to come out of the show you were in when you were younger.â
âWeâre both very driven,â Jaehyun admits. âI do admire that about her, she has a Grammy for fucks sake.â Â
âWhat Iâm getting from this,â Johnny concludes, âis that youâre completely fine with this whole fake dating arrangement.â
âWell, as my manager, you should know Iâm a good actor,â Jaehyun counters.
Johnny laughs. âSure you are. Tomorrow is the last day of shooting, youâve got that big kissing scene, I guess weâll all see how good of an actor you are then.âÂ
Nine:Â
Thereâs something comical about the fact that both you and Jaehyun are chewing gum in preparation for your kissing scene. Together, youâre with Hwasa as she goes over the vision for the shot.Â
âSo, weâre thinking Jaeâs going to grab your neck,â Hwasa starts, âgently, of course. More of a cupping the nape of your neck than a grab, actually. Itâs going to be slow, a slow exploration of moving closer. Lots of close-ups of the two of you gazing into each otherâs eyes. Itâs about breaking the distance, about two worlds colliding and connecting in a way that feels natural, unrushed, and just, electric.âÂ
Jaehyun nods, looking at you. âWe can do this.â You wish you were as sure as he sounds right now.
Jaehyun takes out a tissue, and the two of you spit out your gum, disposing the trash before moving into position.
The shot is on the edge of a cliff, with the desert and sunset stretching out like a vast, yellowy-orange ocean behind you.Â
Itâs as you approach your marked spot that you remember something. âJae,â you ask softly, âare you still afraid of heights?âÂ
You watch him take a deep breath, and he nods, standing a few feet from the drop-off. You notice heâs looking everywhere but down, and something inside of you softens for him.
Here you are, worried about the kiss, and here this man is, worried about falling off the edge of a cliff and dying.Â
âWeâve got some space between us and the edge,â you tell him, stepping closer. âHere, grab my hips, weâre both steady, weâre not going to fall.â
Jaehyunâs lips part, and you can see the confusion on his face.
You suppose youâve never been nurturing to him, but you canât help yourself with this. You donât mean to be a bitch, in fact, youâd argue adamantly that youâre not a malicious person. Jaehyun just pisses you off a lot, and his behavior generally merits a reaction- but right now, he deserves a bit of peace of mind, and you can see him relax a little as his hands grab your waist.
âFeels more steady?â you double-check.
âYeah.â He swallows thickly, nodding.Â
âWeâve got this,â you assure him.
âAre we ready!?â Hwasa calls.
You flash a thumbs up, turning your attention back to Jaehyun.
âAnd⌠action!â
The two of you simply stare at each other for a moment. Hwasa had said she wanted this to be slow. Youâre shocked at how exposed you feel looking up into Jaehyunâs eyes. He really is a very handsome man, and he looks so extremely vulnerable right now.
His gaze shifts to your lips, and you allow him to take the lead. One of his hands moves up your body, cupping the back of your neck gently. You can smell the spearmint on his breath, as he moves closer.
You maintain eye contact until the moment your lips meet, and then, you do your best to just relax, to forget about the cameras pointed at you. You allow yourself to melt into the kiss, following Jaehyunâs motions, following the gentle notes that soon become more heated.
His tongue swipes against your bottom lip, and on instinct, you open your mouth for him, wrapping your arms around the back of his neck to pull him closer.Â
You try to convince yourself that youâre leaning into this for the sake of the scene, that youâre just being good actors together, but thereâs something underneath it all. Thereâs a desperation. You can almost taste it below the spearmint on his tongue.Â
It feels good to be kissing Jaehyun, and the realization makes you break the kiss, opening your eyes and blinking in an effort to get yourself out of the daze thatâs come over you.Â
âThat was amazing!â Hwasaâs voice is like a slap. âIâve got some shots, but Iâll need you guys to do it one more time.â
Jesus.Â
âYou good?â Jaehyun asks.
You nod, swallowing thickly. âLetâs just go again.â
Youâre kissing him again all too soon, and this time, itâs like fireworks. Your heart is racing in your chest, your skin electrified as you cling to Jaehyun, diving deeper into the feeling of him.
This time, heâs the one to break the kiss, and he looks away immediately. You notice him breathing heavily, but before you can say anything, Hwasaâs approaching again.
âOkay, that was amazing, and I hate to be that person, but Iâve decided I want drone shots too, so⌠third time is the charm?â She looks between you and Jaehyun and both of you are quick to nod, although, neither of you has yet found your voice.
âYou good?â you ask him as Hwasa goes back to her spot, her main drone lifting into the sky with an electric thrum.
âYeah, just one more,â Jaehyun says, voice wavering.
The two of you get back into position, and you study Jaehyun carefully. Youâre looking at him, truly looking at him, and heâs looking at you with the same fierceness. You can tell something has shifted between the two of you, but at this time, youâre unsure how deep it really is.
He kisses you again on Hwasaâs direction, and you wonder how normal it is to feel this way during a kissing scene with a fellow acting partner.
Youâve never had to do this before, but you know Jaehyun has. Heâs been in two or three rom-coms, there must be a way to stay professional after kissing a costar, right?Â
But God, he still feels so good.
Youâd thought - or maybe hoped - that the first kiss would be a one-off. That the second wouldnât be as great, and by now, maybe the butterflies would have escaped the cage in your tummy, but no, the feeling surging through you is as powerful and electric as it had been with the first meeting of your lips.Â
He leaves you breathless.
Standing on the edge of the cliff with Jaehyun, you realize youâre in deep shit.Â
Ten:Â
Jaehyun notices you in the mess hall. Youâre looking over food, plating up your dinner, and he decides now is as good a time as any to talk to you.Â
He doesnât mean to be a quiet, sneaky sort of guy, but he canât help the lightness of his walk. When he goes to stand next to you, saying âHi,â you practically jump, your food stray scrambling a little as you compose yourself.
âJesus,â you cuss. âYou scared me!â
âSorry,â he apologizes sheepishly, rubbing the back of his neck. âSo⌠uh, the shoot is over, I head to Milan tomorrow-â
âYup, I know your schedule,â you nod, sighing. âItâs in our contract that I come to your show and be front row to watch you, remember?â
âRight, yeah.â Jaehyun swallows thickly. âSo⌠reporters are going to be asking a lot of questions about us.â
âUh huh, that was the point of the paparazzi pics.â You continue filling your tray with food, so unbothered and cool in your movements that it makes Jaehyunâs heart beat faster. Are you unaffected by your kiss from earlier? Because Jaehyun canât get the feeling of your lips out of his mind.Â
âI just uh, wanted to say, you can trust me to give the right answers and stuff. Iâm PR trained.â
God, Jaehyun wants to strangle himself. He feels so nervous, and the look you give him tells him that you think heâs being a dork. Heâs definitely being a dork-
âOkay?â you laugh. âIâm PR trained too, we both took classes when we were kids, remember?âÂ
âRight,â heâs such an idiot, âyeah. Anyways, I guess⌠I guess Iâll see you in Milan in a couple of days.âÂ
âSounds good.â
With one final nod, Jaehyun leaves you be, and he beats himself up about the awkwardness of the conversation for the rest of the night.Â
Eleven:
In this week's news, our favourite kidsâ show alumni were spotted getting close on set. y/nâs new music video, Model Cowboy, is set to be one of the videos of the summer, starring Prada ambassador Jung Jaehyun. The two have a long history, and while there have been rumors about their romantic connection in the past, nothing has ever been confirmed⌠until now.
TMZ dropped a photo of the two embracing outside Jaehyunâs trailer, and the internet officially broke. #modelcowboy has been going absolutely wild on X. One user wrote: âall my dreams are finally coming true! Thank you mama e papa!â While another took to X to say this: âAt first, I didnât love Jaehyun as the whole âmodel cowboyâ trope. He just doesnât fit it for me. But I donât know, something about the pictures of him and y/n just feels right- guess you donât need a history as a rancher to be a cowboy, heâs definitely lassoed my heart.â
So far, the general consensus around our new âIt Coupleâ is that itâs been a long time coming. While thereâs no official confirmation about their relationship, one of our reporters caught Jaehyun after a show in Milan last night. When asked about their time shooting the music video together, the actor/Prada ambassador had this to say about y/n: âShe was amazing. The whole experience [filming Model Cowboy] went without a hitch. Sheâs super talented, one of the most driven women I know, and I canât wait to see how this music video pans out for her.â
When asked about the pictures of the two of them that have been trending, Jaehyun said: âI mean, sheâs beautiful, sheâs an icon- who wouldnât want a chance with her?â When the reporter clarified by asking if theyâre dating, Jaehyun noted, âYouâll have to ask y/n, Iâd never be âthatâ guy who would speak for a powerful woman like her.âÂ
All we can say is damn, thatâs a green flag if weâve ever seen one.Â
Stay tuned for all things celebrity drama and news on our website, or follow us on Instagram and Snapchat for daily updates.Â
Twelve:Â
Thereâs nothing like the closing night of a show. Jaehyun feels elated, he feels on the top of his game, like nothing could bring him down.Â
âYou were amazing,â another model tells him, fluffing her hair up with her hand as the two of them decompress backstage.Â
âYou were amazing, Vivienne,â he retorts, never feeling more giddy and boyish than he does now.Â
âIâm good, but Iâm not model of the year good,â she grins.Â
âYouâre still new,â Jaehyun assures her, although, pride is swelling through him.
He sees her skin flush, her eye lashes fluttering at him-
âJae?â your voice draws him out of his assessment of Vivienne, and he turns in shock to find you standing there.
You look stunning, your stylist team has really outdone themselves with your looks for the past couple of days- but thereâs a sour set to your lips that immediately tells him something is wrong.
âY/N?â he asks.
âAm I⌠interrupting something?â your gaze shifts to Vivienne, and Jaehyun immediately understands whatâs going on.
âExcuse us,â he says to Vivienne, grabbing your hand to tug you a few feet away. His voice lowers when he asks, âAre you jealous right now?â
âNo,â you retort immediately. âWhat reason would I have to be jealous?â
Youâre making a big show about the notion of jealousy being ridiculous, but Jaehyun knows heâs hit the nail on the head.Â
âNo reason at all,â Jaehyun assures you, and he truly means it. He knows this whole dating this is a PR move, but he hasnât been able to get you out of his head all week. Every time heâs walked past you sitting front row at the shows- well, heâs been feeling butterflies in a way that heâs hardly been able to admit to himself. âHey, listen-â
âNo, you listen,â you cut him off. âYour show is over, we both fly different places tomorrow morning, management will set our schedules to keep up this whole fake dating thing, I just wanted to say goodbye before I go back to my hotel.âÂ
âOh, right.â Jaehyun can feel his heart sink in his chest. âUh⌠where are you staying?â
âIâm at the Four Seasons.â
âDo you maybe want to get drinks later or something?â he asks.
âIâm sure you have after parties to go to with your⌠model friends.â Your gaze shifts to Vivienne again, and that same sour twist to your lips appears.
Jaehyun wants to reassure you, but- the words just arenât coming. Besides, what would he even say? Weâre fake dating but Iâve been rethinking our entire dynamic since we kissed and now Iâm not so sure I want it to be fake, because Iâm actually really into you, and all of our bickering in the past has been because Iâm jealous of your driven nature and Iâve seen you as competition but now I see that we can do more together than apart?
It feels like a lot of word vomit, and Jaehyunâs not about to projectile all of that at you right now. He doesnât want to look stupid again, doesnât want to feel like an idiot. Heâs scared of rejection, in a way heâs never been scared of it before.Â
Instead, dejected, he just nods. âYeah, I guess.â
âOkay, so you go have fun, Iâm going back to my hotel, and like I said, Iâll see you when I see you.â
Jaehyun watches you leave, and suddenly, the high from the fashion show has depleted. No one has ever had this kind of hold on his emotions before, and Jaehyun knows heâs going to have to do something about it, he just doesnât know what.Â
Thirteen:Â
âJeeze, Mark, I told you, Iâm going to bed-â Your words cut off as you open your hotel door and find Jaehyun, not Mark, standing there.
âUh⌠Hi?â Jaehyun smile sheepishly, and you look him up and down.
Heâs in a form fitting suit, but it looks somewhat ragged. His shirt is unbuttoned haphazardly, his hair a little fussed, and his cheeks are flushed pink.Â
âWhat are you doing here?â you ask.
âWell, I went to the afterparty, like you told me to, but⌠I donât know, I just felt bad about how we left things.â
Youâre shocked at how candid heâs being, and you donât see a hint of dishonestly in his body language. âHave⌠have you been drinking?â you question next.
âJust a little,â he admits. âCan IâŚâ Jaehyun looks around the hallway outside. âCan I come in?â
âI should really be going to sleep soon-â
âYeah, I heard, Markâs been on your ass,â Jaehyun nods, swallowing, âbut uhâŚâ he leans forward, voice lowering, âWhatâs that pipsqueak going to do about you staying up just a little later? I mean, you can sleep on your flight tomorrow, canât you?âÂ
Yeah, Jaehyun is drunk. âDid you just call Mark a pipsqueak?â you ask in shock.
âSo what if I did?â He grins lazily.Â
âJae-â
ây/n.â
You sigh. âCome in, sit down, and let me grab you some water.â
âYes, maâam.â His smile is much too large for your liking as he enters your hotel room, going to the couch like a good boy.Â
You can feel his eyes on you as you get him a bottle of water from the fridge, moving to join him. âHere.â
âThanks.â He unscrews the cap as you sit down, taking a large gulp.
âSo⌠whatâs this about?â
Heâs still drinking the water, like a child after a marathon, just drinking and drinking with small stops to gasp for air- you canât help but laugh a little, watching with amusement.
Jaehyun finishes the entire bottle. âSo-â He takes a deep breath. âI wanted to apologize.â
âFor what?â
âMaking you jealous earlier.â
âWhat?â Youâre in shock. âI was not jealous.âÂ
âYou were, and itâs okay.â He places his hand on your knee and you look down at it then up at him questioningly. âI was jealous of you and Haechan back in the day, but the difference is, I wasnât hitting on Vivienne, I was just trying to be nice to her, you know, as male model of the year and everything.â
âJae-â
âI wasnât hitting on her,â he says again, expression turning firm. âYouâre my girlfriend and Iâd never, ever do that to you.â
âIâm not your girlfriend.â
âContractually, you are,â Jaehyun insists. âI can be a good boyfriend to you, if you let me try.â
Heâs leaning in now, and you grab a pillow, haphazardly shoving it between the two of you so he can kiss that instead.
âJae!â You hop off of the couch, heart racing.
âShit, sorry, youâre just- God, have I ever told you that you glow?â Jaehyun looks up at you with an expression youâve never seen on him, itâs almost like admiration.
âWhat are you even saying?â
âYou glow. You light up the room. You just- you sparkle, even without disco balls and diamonds.â
You wrap your silky night robe tighter around your body, feeling self conscious. âI donât glow.â
âYou do,â he insists. âEven when we were younger. I think- I think part of me always worried your glow would diminish mine, if that makes sense- but, but after seeing some of the footage from the music video, I see that, now that weâre older, when we do stuff together, when weâre not competing, we can glow together.â
So heâs like⌠very drunk.
But⌠havenât you always heard that drunk words are sober thoughts?
You look down at him, and it feels like youâre seeing him in a new light.Â
âJae?â you question.
âYes?â
âWhatâs going on?â
âWhen we kissed that day on set, I felt something.â
âAre you⌠not used to feeling things?â you ask.
âNot feeling things like that,â Jaehyun corrects. âI mean, butterflies, sparks, you know, corny rom com shit.â
Your stomach flips, heart beginning to beat faster in your chest- so heâd felt the connection too.
âLook, okay, this is going to be embarrassing if you reject me, but, fuck it, I want to get this all off my chest.â Jaehyun takes a deep breath, running his fingers through his silky hair to steady himself. âI like you. I think, a part of me has always liked you, but, I also used to see you as competition. Now that weâre older, now that weâre both successful, I donât see you that way anymore- and before you think thatâs another backhanded compliment, I just mean, youâve won Grammys. Youâre- a fucking star. And I think⌠maybe Iâve grown to the point where I can accept other peopleâs successes without seeing it as a diminishment on my own.â
Youâre surprised he can speak this well and use big words while clearly feeling the effects of alcohol, and even more than that, youâre surprised by the context of what heâs saying.Â
Jeong Jaehyun thinks youâre a star. He recognizes your hard work and your success. Heâs not just some smug asshole looking down at you, heâs actually seeing you, and maybe⌠maybe youâre beginning to see him.Â
âI appreciate the compliment of what youâre saying,â you tell him, picking your own words carefully.Â
âThereâs that PR training,â Jaehyun winks. âYouâre cute. Glowy, little, cute, superstar. Maybe thatâs what I should call you, my little superstar, the media would eat it up.â
âThatâs your PR training,â you laugh.Â
âWe canât help it,â he smiles up at you.
âCan I say something without you getting upset?â
âIâll do my best,â Jaehyun promises solemnly.
âI want to start by saying this isnât a rejection,â you clarify, âI just wish you would have told me all of this while sober, instead of showing up at my apartment near midnight before we both fly out of town in the morning.â
âI can see that,â Jaehyun nods. âI guess, you kind of scare me.â
âI scare you?â you laugh.Â
âUh huh.â He swallows thickly. âLike heights.â
Heâs so adorably dorky for a famous actor and Prada brand ambassador.
âBut- on that cliff that day, when we kissed, and you reassured me, and you let me hold your hips- I donât know, it was nice. I- thanks, thanks for doing that.â
âI can be quite nurturing if I think someone deserves it,â you tell him. âWhich, speaking of, youâre still drunk, and you downed that whole bottle of water, I think I should get you another, and maybe we can move somewhere more comfortable.â
âLike.. the bedroom?â Thereâs a glint in his eye, and it makes you scoff.
âGet your mind out of the gutter Jae, you can stay on this couch for all I care.â
âIâll be good,â he promises, crossing his heart haphazardly.
âCome on.â You hold your hand out for him and Jaehyun takes it, allowing you to help him to his feet. You go get another bottle of water and the two of you move to the bedroom. The mattress is substantially more comfortable than the couch, and Jaehyun releases an audible moan as he clammers down onto it.
You get situated, moing under the covers so you feel less exposed.
âI like it when youâre nice like this,â Jaehyun sighs.
âIâd be nicer if you didnât always tease me.â
âYou like it when I tease.â
âI actually hated it when you told me not to slip as I was getting onto the horse during the shoot, and it completely made me mess up and slip,â you point out, still irritated by that ordeal.
âOkay, to be fair, yes, Iâm sorry, but also, your dress was silky as fuck, you were going to slip even if I didnât say anything, and thatâs not your fault, itâs Jenniâs for not giving you better clothes to actually ride a horse with.â
He has a point there.
âSoâŚâ Jaehyun switches topic, his demeanor getting more anxious, âback on the couch, you said you werenât rejecting me⌠can you⌠can you explain what that meant.â
âIt meant Iâm not rejecting you.â
âAnd salt of the earth means salt of the earth,â Jaehyun retorts, rolling his eyes. âCan you give me a Mark style explanation on what you meant.â
âI meantâŚâ you think about it for a second. âI like you too, I think you might be more into me than Iâm into you at the moment-â
âOh yeah?â he counters, crossing his arms over his chest and getting pouty.
âYeah,â you laugh.
âFine, okay, maybe,â Jaehyun concedes. âBut?â
âBut⌠Iâm willing to explore something with you.â
âYeah?â His expression brightens. âReally?â
âWeâd just have to sort out details, you know- weâre on contract for three or so months, so, if we gave it a real go, and things ended before our contract, how would that even work? There are limitations to having a relationship with someone you work with.â
Jaehyun looks down at the water bottle in his hands, clearly thinking it through. âWe can⌠take it slow? I mean, weâd have to, since we both have different schedules and will be in different countries tomorrow.â
âSlow could work,â you agree.Â
The two of you stare at each other for a moment, and you almost think heâs going to lean in for a kiss again, and then he asks, âWhat did happen with you and Haechan? Your first single was about him, right?â
You release a laugh, if this is really a can of worms he wants to open, then you suppose you can let him open it.
You begin to explain to him your history with Haechan, and Jaehyun listens intently. Somehow, he gets the ball rolling on your recent relationship with Lee Jeno, and before you know it, two hours have passed with the two of you just discussing past relationships.
Jaehyun tells you about his own exâs, about his lack of accountability and emotional maturity. He gives voice to all the trouble spots youâve identified about him in the past, and clarity on his hopes for being better in the future.
He also noticeably sobers up, which makes you feel a lot better about having this sort of intimate conversation with him.
Soon, youâre both just laying in bed facing each other, talking about everything and anything. âDo you remember that time the catering company on set changed?â Jaehyun asks.
âOh my god, yeah, when the higher ups wanted more vegan and vegetarian options, and it was just like, raw fruit and veggies with store bought hummus?â
âJaemin wasnât used to eating anything that wasnât carbs or meat and in the middle of a take he had to run to the bathroom?â Jaehyun adds.
âShat his pants and everything, pissed wardrobe off in a way Iâve never seen,â you giggle. âWhat ever happened to him?â
âI donât keep up with many of our old castmates,â Jaehyun admits. âBut I think heâs some radio show host or something now, has a segment about embarrassing first dates and stuff.â
âHe always loved messy gossip,â you sigh, happy to be reminiscing in this way.
There are only a handful of people who can understand what it was like to be on a kids show in your early teens, only a few others in the world you could possibly have this conversation with.
Despite your differences, you and Jaehyun come from the same place, and it makes it easy to talk to him.
Jaehyunâs staring at you, and he pushes a strand of hair out of your face. âShould I let you sleep?â he asks. âItâs two AM.â
Youâre hardly tired at this point, and now that Jaeâs sober⌠and in your bed⌠your own mind has found its way into the gutter, and youâre not quite sure what to do about that.
âCan I be honest with you?â you ask.
âAlways.â
âI havenât gotten laid in a long time,â you sigh. âAnd⌠weâre flying to different places tomorrow, so maybe itâs not the best idea Iâve ever had-â
âIt is,â Jaehyun interrupts you. âThe best idea youâve ever had.â You shoot him a look and Jaehyun laughs, back tracking. âI mean, your lyrics and albums are great ideas too- but I just mean⌠If youâre horny, then youâre horny, and Iâm, well, here.âÂ
âI just donât want you to feel taken advantage of.â
âEven if youâd tried to fuck me when I first walked in here, all drunk and being stupid, it still wouldnât have been taking advantage of me.â
âI think fucking someone while theyâre drunk is one of the most obvious scenarios of taking advantage of someone,â you counter.
âOkay, true, but- you know what Iâm saying.â Jaehyun flashes you a knowing look. âIf you want me to fuck you, Iâll fuck you.â
âThatâs so romantic,â you roll your eyes.Â
Jaehyun laughs, and then he sits up, looking down at you. âIf you want romance, we can go shower together or something. I could⌠romantically wash your body, and tell you how perfect you are-â
âItâs two am, fuck that. Just kiss me.â
Jaehyun grins, then he leans over you, staring into your eyes. Heâs moving slower than you thought he would, and part of you wishes heâd just ravage you like some primal animal- but no, heâs acting like he did in your music video. You can practically see adoration in his eyes, and his hand comes up to cup your cheek in a way thatâs almost loving.Â
âI meant it when I said that you glow,â Jaehyun says softly.
âI know you did,â you breathe, grabbing the back of his neck to draw his lips to yours.
Itâs odd how familiar the two of you already are. The kiss isnât awkward at all, but then again, your first kiss hadnât been either.
Neither of you are trying to dominate it, youâre moving slowly, reading each otherâs body language and cues.Â
When his tongue gently licks your lip, you open your mouth for him, drawing him closer as the kiss deepens.Â
Jaehyun shifts in your embrace, and then heâs moving to be between your legs, which spread for him. Heâs on top of you now, elbows digging into the pillows while you make out like teenagers in love for the first time.
He just feels so good.Â
For a long time, youâve felt like an anxious person. You have a lot of weight on your shoulders, but when youâre kissing Jaehyun, that pressure feels lifted. Your mind goes blank as the two of you make out, your body at the forefront instead of your thoughts.Â
Jaehyun slowly begins to grind down against you, and the gentle pressure on your clit has you groaning against his lips.
You feel him smirk, and then he begins to kiss down your throat, taking his time to suck gently on your skin.
One of his hands slides up your thigh, teasing the waistband of your sleeping shorts before moving back down again. Heâs so warm, and you hips push up for more stimulus.
âJae-â you whimper, threading your fingers in his hair.
âSlow, or fast?â he asks, pulling away from your throat to look down at you.
âA bit of both.â
He cocks his head to the side.
âFast to get my clothes off, slow to explore, then make me cum,â you clarify.
Jaehyun laughs. âWhatever you want, superstar.â
Your skin tingles at the nickname, and your pussy throbs as Jaehyun begins to remove his clothes. Each button feels like an eternity to get undone, but when he slips the fabric off, you find yourself practically drooling.
He has such a perfect body, not too lean, not too muscled, just perfect.Â
Then, Jaehyun begins to take off your robe and you sit up to help him. Soon, your shirt is being tugged over your head, and your nipples immediately pebble at the cool air of your hotel room.
You lay back down, staring up at him while Jaehyun takes in your body.
âGlowing,â he whispers, cupping your breast and rubbing his thumb across your nipple.Â
You whimper at the sensation, and his eyes move up to your face. Heâs grinning at you. âSensitive?â he asks, gently pinching the bud.
You groan, shifting against the bed. âYeah.â
âIâll take care of you,â Jaehyun promises, leaning down to kiss you again.
He begins to descend to your throat again, but this time, he goes even farther down, making it to your chest. The first flick of his tongue against your nipple has you whining, and you thread your fingers through his hair again, closing your eyes to enjoy the sensation.
He continues to suck on your breasts, paying attention to both nipples. You can feel yourself getting wetter and wetter by the second, and youâre torn between loving the feeling of this and wanting something more.
Itâs as if he reads you, because he pulls away from your chest, hooking his fingers in your shorts. You both adjust to allow him to get you fully naked, and then he lays down between your legs. He presses kisses along the sensitive flesh of your thighs, looking up at you.
Thereâd been a time in your life when you hadnât loved eye contact during pussy eating, but thereâs something so erotic about the way Jaehyunâs watching you as he brings his mouth to your core.
He kisses your clit gently, and you watch as his eyes close, his tongue swiping up your folds to taste the wet that has accumulated there.
He groans, delving deeper with his tongue, his large hands grabbing your thighs as an anchor as he begins to devour you.Â
Has anyone ever eaten you out like this? Jeno wasnât much of a giver unfortunately, and it feels like forever since youâve had someone doing to you what Jaehyun is currently doing.
Your entire body feels alive, with each flick and suck- Youâre clutching at the blankets now, moaning desperately as he works you up faster than any man before him ever has.
You guess you hadnât put a time limit on making you cum. Youâd told him fast to undress, which he did, slow to explore, which he also did- and now, it seems heâs intent on making you cum on his tongue, which is something you have no issues with.
âJae-â you whimper, reaching down to tangle your fingers in his hair.
He looks up at you and you begin to move your hips, riding his face. He stays still, letting you use him, and you can tell from the groan he releases that he kind of likes you taking control in this way.
âIâm close,â you tell him. âPlease make me cum.â
Jaehyunâs fingers dig into your thighs, and then heâs back at it. He takes lead again, sucking your clit into his mouth while you cry out and grab the sheets with your free hand.
Your eyes close, your back arching a little as he works you closer and closer to the edge.
Itâs a steady build of pleasure, and then, youâre tipping over. You release a strangled gasp as ecstasy courses through you like electric shocks from the tip of your head down to your toes and fingers.
You can feel your pussy contracting with pleasure, a steady rhythm that prolongs the sensation. Jaehyun continues to suck on your clit, helping you through everything until youâre a gasping mess.
He relents, and you can hear him sit up. Your eyes are still closed, one hand now haphazardly thrown across your eyes as you try to catch your breath.
The sound of Jaehyunâs pants hitting the floor draws your attention, and you look up to find Jaehyun standing there in all his glory.
âStill want to do this?â he asks.
âGet over here,â you command, opening your arms for him.
Jaehyun flashes you a grin, then he rejoins you on the bed.
Your lips are meeting a moment later. Itâs not a gentle slow exploration anymore, but a hungry, lust fuelled haze. You can taste yourself on his tongue and it turns you even more. You wrap your legs around his hips, tugging him closer.
His cock rubs between your pussy lips and you whimper, reaching between yourselves to line him up- Jaehyun takes your hand, moving it aside. Then, two fingers enter your soaked core and you groan against his lips.
âGotta prep you,â Jaehyun muses. âYou said you havenât been fucked in a while.âÂ
âDonât tease though,â you warn gently, looking up at him.
âNever.â He kisses you again, drowning out the anxious thoughts as he finger fucks you, spreading his fingers and working you open in preparation for his cock.
Jaehyun begins to curl his digits, hitting the sensitive spot inside of you that has you groaning. You break the kiss to burrow your face against his throat, panting as he draws more and more pleasure out of your already exhausted body.
You feel something drip on your upper thigh, and you look down to see the precum leaking out of Jaehyunâs tip. âSorry,â he groans, âIâm just, super turned on right now.â
âThen fuck me,â you insist, biting at his earlobe. âIâm prepped now.â
âYou sure?â
âWeâre both dripping, Jae, just fuck me.â
âYou got it, superstar.â Jaehyun grins as he kisses you. He finger fucks you a little more and then he pulls his digits out of your wet core. You watch him sit up, licking his fingers clean, then he grabs the base of his cock.
He presses the tip into you, looking up to watch your reaction. When you release a moan, Jaehyun grins. He steadies over you again, his biceps bulging as his lips meet your own. He pushes deeper inside of you, taking it slow until his hips are flush against yours.
You both groan at the feeling.
âSee?â you gasp. âTold you I could take you.â
âTaking me so well,â Jaehyun agrees, his breath hot against your throat as he begins to pepper your skin with kisses.
Jaehyunâs hips start to move, and he fucks you gently at first, allowing your inner walls to get used to the size of him. His kisses distract you as he opens you up, his pace increasing.
You release a loud moan when the tip of his cock hits a deep spot inside of you, and you can feel Jaehyun grin against your throat. âRight there?â he asks, doing the motion again. âIs that the place?â
âYeah,â you whimper, nodding. âRight there.â
Jaehyun brings his lips to your own, and he kisses you deeply as he continues to abuse that special spot. Your arms wrap around his shoulders, keeping him close as he fucks you. God, youâre so lost in him, in the best possible way.
You never miss out on beauty sleep, but Jaehyun is more than worth it.
âSuperstar?â
âYeah?â you ask, half delirious.
âWould it be bad if I asked you to ride me?âÂ
âHuh?â
âI just- I could still fuck up into you, but I donât know, I kind of want to see you on top.â
âReally?â you look up at him in shock. âYou strike me as a man who likes to have control.â
âSays the woman who likes to have control,â he counters with a grin. âOr⌠do you just want to be my pillow princess?â
You consider it for a moment. âYou know what, yeah, let me get on top, I want to watch you when you cum.â
Jaehyun physically shivers from your words, and you watch his pupils dilate with interest. âFuck,â he groans. âYeah, get on top.â
Itâs a quick adjustment, with Jaehyun dragging you onto his lap. You sit down on his cock and both of you groan at the feeling. Heâs completely inside of you like this, and you press your hands to his chest, steadying yourself for a moment.
Then, you begin to bounce.
Jaehyun throws his head back against the pillows, moaning deeply.
Fuck, heâs so hot like this.
Thereâs something so erotic about being on top, on knowing that youâre going to be riding him when he cums.
Your whole relationship has been about competing for power, and now, in the midst of one of the most vulnerable exchanges of power, Jaehyun had stopped from his position on top to give you the opportunity to be in control.
You like that. You like it a lot.Â
It shows he hadnât been lying when heâd talked about the two of you glowing together, and it gives you a newfound kind of hope for whatever relationship is budding between the two of you.
You ride him harder at the thought, and his hands find your hips, helping you bounce.
âFuck, fuck-â Jaehyun groans, his fingers digging into your skin. âFeels so good.â
In all honesty, the first position had felt better for you, when he was doing all the work, but youâd never admit that to him, especially not while deep in the throes of passion like this. Heâd already made you cum, and now, you want to return the favour.
You ignore the burning in your thighs, fucking Jaehyun in a way youâve never fucked a man before. You can feel the power of it bubbling inside of you, and you focus on his expression, on the pleasure thatâs written all over him.
âJae,â you groan, âwant you to cum for me.â
âDonât-â he swallows thickly. âDonât you want me to hold out a little longer?â
âItâs our first time, we have flights tomorrow,â you retort. âJust let go, I wanna feel it.â
âYou and your scheduling,â Jaehyun laughs, but it quickly turns into a groan, his eyes closing again. âFuck, okay, but you have to let me make it up to you sometime.â
âNext time we see each other we can spend hours fucking,â you tell him.
âPromise?â
âI promise, now be good and cum for me, yeah?â
Jaehyun shivers again, and thereâs a slight look of confusion on his face. You get the sense that heâs not used to being talked down to like this- but itâs clear it turns him on in a new, foreign sort of way.
âOkay, yeah.â Jaehyun anchors himself against the bed, and then he begins fucking up into you, his muscles rippling under his perfect skin. âShit, fuck-â
You watch the pleasure build in him, until he reaches his peak. The tension clearly snaps, and he lets out a deep groan that goes straight to your core.
You continue to ride him, intent on helping him through it-
Jaehyun grabs you and pulls you down to his chest, holding you still as he shoots his load deep in your pussy. Heâs groaning in your ear, hips twitching-
God, you love the way youâre pinned like this, the way heâs cumming so hard he needed you to just stop.Â
You allow him to finish, and his grip slowly lets up on you. Heâs no longer using his strength to keep you still, heâs just holding you, the two of you panting desperately.
âCan I ask you something?â
âYeah,â you mumble.
âThat day, behind my trailer, the first time I held you,â Jaehyun clears his throat, âcould you feel my heart racing the way it is now?â
âI was more focused on my own heart,â you admit.
âYeah?â
âIt was going pretty fast.â
Jaehyun releases a laugh, holding you tighter. âGuess we were both in for it, huh?â
âGuess so.âÂ
Jaehyun holds you a little while longer, and then he sighs. âI should let you get your beauty sleep.â
âYeah, but you can stay over if you want.â
âReally?â
âCould you imagine how much people would react if the paparazzi got a picture of you leaving my hotel tomorrow morning?â
Another chuckle escapes him. âYou and your PR training.â
âYou love it,â you insist.
Jaehyun releases a sigh, burying his face closer to your throat. âI do love it.âÂ
Youâre from the same world, the same industry, and no one has ever understood you or your job the way Jaehyun does.
Wrapped in his arms, the two of you set to fly to different countries in just a couple of hours, something about him just feels so right.
Youâve spent your whole life trying to be someone else for other people, for your management team, for your fans- but with Jaehyun, maybe you can just be exactly who you are, professional obligations and all.
Heâd said it himself, heâd seen your glow from the moment you met, even as awkward kids on a tv show trying to make names for yourself. Heâd seen your sparkle before youâd even seen it in yourself, and now, maybe heâs right. Maybe you can learn to glow together.
âď¸Â mlist + an. thank you for reading! I kind of loved working on this au, I know it's not classical 'he's an actual cowboy' but I really loved working with Jae as this character
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đŽ preview. Youâve been in love before, but it was always different. You were always with men who saw you as a prize. They put you on a pedestal, and it was often one sided with genuine empathy. You were a support in their lives, as opposed to a form of mutual understanding.But Jaehyun understands you, so you can confidently say heâs the sweetest love youâve had.
cw/ tw. Unprotected sex, worship kink, substantial foreplay/prep, fingering, squirting, multiple reader orgasms, overstim, dirty talk, praise, man handling, anal (thumb in the butt), etc⌠ I petnames. (hers) superstar.Â
đšÂ rating. 18+ explicit I wc. 2.4k I teaser wc. 180
đ starring. Jaehyun x afab!Reader
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âWow,â you breathe, staring out at the crowd as you clutch the Grammy in your hand. âI can honestly say, I never expected this award. To win Best Music Video, I just- Iâm in shock. I want to thank my parents, my label, my team of wonderful people, production, styling, Hwasa, who directed the video, and Mark, my manager. I want to thank my fans especially, I wouldnât be anywhere without you. And, I also want to thank my amazing scene partner, Jaehyun. I know a lot of people were confused about Jae being the Model Cowboy, but he showed up to set, and something just clicked. We made magic with this one, and I wouldnât have wanted it any other way. Thanks again, wow, thanks.âÂ
Youâre practically shaking as you make your way off the stage to go rejoin your group of people in the audience. Hwasa and Mark both give you a hug, and Johnny pats you on the back. When you reach Jaehyun, he wraps his arms around you, holding you tight as he presses kisses along your face.
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am i the asshole? (most likely, yes)
a series where either you or the member does something morally wrong for an unjustified reason. all seven stories are in its own universe so they are not connected in any way. the order of the fics being published are random, not in age order. this may or may not take awhile.
mark - aita for immediately going to comfort my best friend's ex after they broke up so we could link up?

Since the very first time mark saw you, he knew he had to have you. The only problem was that you were introduced as Johnnyâs girlfriend to him. Which is why when johnny texted him that the relationship was over, he immediately sprinted to your apartment so he could play the good guy whoâs lending a shoulder to lean on while you cried your eyes out. He had it all planned out.
read here
renjun - aita for being possessive about my childhood best friendâs virginity?

It has been awhile since you last met Renjun. Perhaps your last encounter was right after graduation. You recently came back to your old neighborhood, having drinks with your favorite childhood best friend. And it slipped out of you that you had never had sex, despite a whole semester in college. Renjun took that as an invitation. Afterall, you experienced every one of your firsts with Renjun.
read here
jeno - aita for seducing my step brother because i got jealous that he got a girlfriend?

Itâs been a year since your parents got married and you were officially Lee Jenoâs step sister. Despite living under the same roof, you never really seriously connected with him and itâs all because of your huge crush on him. You didnât want Jeno to see you as a family member, so you kept your distance. Until he brought home a girl and something inside you just burns at the thought of him sleeping with her.
read here
haechan - aita for fucking my girlfriend while my webcam was still on so my friends could watch?

Haechan always showed you off to his friends and you didnât mind it at all. You find it hot anyway. What you didnât know was the fact that he also always showed your body off to them too. All the times you had recorded your sexy times, all went into Haechanâs friendsâ folders.
read here
jaemin - aita for only agreeing to be friends with benefits with him so i could play with his cats?

You partnered up with Jaemin by chance, not knowing that he was a father to three adorable cats. And to say that youâre a cat person was an understatement. Since then, you always came over to Jaeminâs apartment which resulted in you being under him at some point. If you were saying frankly, you didnât give a fuck about the sex. All you think about everytime you were there were luna, lucy and luke.
read here
chenle - aita for hooking up with a random man i met at the club while i was in a fight with my boyfriend?

Your boyfriend always told you that he hated girls at the club, saying that they were easier than prostitutes and such. Which drove you to the decision to go to a club after your hundredth fight with him, just to provoke him. It was never your intention to be in another manâs arms that night.
read here
jisung - aita for not deleting the nudes that my best friend accidentally sent me?

Jisung knew about your situationship thatâs been going on for about five months. He doesnât know the details, though. Truth be told, itâs embarrassing to admit to him that your situationship barely ever pays attention to you lately. So you decided to take it up a notch by sending him nudes. Which then you only realized 20 minutes later that you sent it to Jisung by mistake.
read here
#nct dream smut#haechan smut#donghyuck smut#park jisung smut#chenle smut#jaemin smut#jeno smut#mark lee smut#renjun smut#pinky's aita series#nct smut
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My dear lgbt+ kids,Â
âMy therapist told me that, according to psychology, girls who often stay up til 3 am for no reason actually show a trauma response. You lacked a loving mother figure in childhood, so you deprive yourself of sleep because you werenât taught to love yourself.âÂ
I came across that piece of info on social media recently, and Iâd like to offer an addition:Â
My therapist told me that, according to psychology, you can make up random things and pass them off as scientific⌠if you just put enough meaningless phrases in front of it.Â
You probably caught the irony here. In fact, âaccording to psychologyâ and âmy therapist told meâ are completely meaningless phrases in my statement here! They make it seem like Iâm presenting a scientific fact, but thereâs no substance behind them. Iâm just telling you my own thought.Â
I did it on purpose and wanted you to catch it, but it can be more tricky to spot out there in the wild (or, well, on social media) - because intuitively, that quote up there sounds pretty trustworthy, doesnât it? We are taught to look for a source and it conveniently provides one for us: psychology. Psychology says this, so itâs legit!Â
But phrases like âaccording to psychologyâ, âmy therapist saysâ or even âstudies sayâ may only pose as sources. Letâs look into it a bit closer:Â
âAccording to psychologyâ - Psychology is not really a source that can be quoted like that. Psychology is an immense field of study that covers lots of different areas (biological psychology, neuroscience, social psychology, behavioral psychology etc.), so who or what exactly is being cited here? A specific expert? A specific study? A specific book?Â
âMy therapist saidâ - in which context? Therapists usually give advice thatâs tailored to the patientâs individual situation which likely looks different to yours (since no two people lead the exact same life), so how do you know this specific piece of information is also applicable to your situation (let alone applicable to everyone)?
The next one is especially tricky:
âStudies sayâ - studies can be a great source, but which study are we talking about? Who did the study? How was it done? How many people participated in it? Are the results generalizable in the way the post claims? (And before all that: is there even any specific study being cited at all here, or is this just a fully meaningless claim?)Â
While we are on the topic of generalization: obviously Iâm not trying to make some blanket statement that everyone who ever uses these phrases is a liar with evil intentions. Sometimes we just use simple phrases for complex concepts to make them more accessible or easily digestible, and thatâs fine.Â
And just as importantly, sometimes we are just human and make some thinking mistakes (such as âthis connection my therapist made about MY childhood and MY behavior in adulthood must be applicable to everyone who shows that behavior. Making that connection helped me, so surely Iâm helping others by posting about it!â) without any bad intentions.Â
Iâm just encouraging you to critically think about the information you read or share online - even beyond the basic âis there a sourceâ check.Â
With all my love,Â
Your Tumblr DadÂ
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A Magical Surprise
Summary: You plan a trip with your little family to Disney, but you have a magical surprise for Joe of your own. Requested by this anon!
Pairings: dad!Joe Burrow x mom!reader
Warnings: none, some Disney adventure fluff, Joe having major dad energy, pregnancy announcement
Note: Hi! Thank you to the anon who requested this. Some good ole tooth-rotting fluff after all the spice I've written recently. I think this turned out cute, and I somewhat proofread it (oops). Hope you all enjoy!
Word Count: 1.8k
Check out my Masterlist here!
Taglist: @burrowbarbie @definitelynotdomanique @one-sweet-gubler @plushkhiii @enchantedinfinity @iosivb9 Feel free to comment or message me if you'd like to be added to the list!
You and Joe had talked at length about taking your little family on a getaway. The two of you as a couple hadnât taken a trip since you had your son, aside from going to see Joe play. It took a bit of time for you to get to that point and were only able to travel to so many games. Your son had not taken a trip outside of Joeâs games before either, having both of your families local was a blessing. After some planning and brainstorming, the two of you decided what better place to take him than Disney. He was at that age where he was able to go on the rides and actually enjoy it as well as you and Joe getting to bask in some memories while he was little. Everything was still so new to him in his little world, that being able to bring his favorite characters to life would be an amazing sight to see.
In the days leading up to the trip, you had been feeling somewhat off. You hadnât thought too much of it, but there were some similarities to the symptoms you had felt when you were pregnant with your son. You decided to play it safe and take a pregnancy test before you traveled. Sure as shit, the small plus sign popped up fairly quickly and confirmed your suspicions. You were so excited, having discussed before that it felt like the right time to try for baby #2. It was eating at you that you hadn't told him yet but had the perfect idea planned out to surprise him during your trip.Â
You were able to play how you were feeling off to Joe by saying how you mustâve gotten a little bit of something from work, but how you knew youâd be feeling better in time. He seemed wary, but took your word for it, doting on you for anything you asked for.Â
âI just want to make sure youâre okay mamas, gotta be feeling well so you can enjoy our tripâ Joe would say, bringing you crackers and seltzer to settle your stomach. Little did he know, it was your morning sickness hitting you in full force. You couldnât wait to tell him.
Your flight was a breeze, your son sleeping the entire way like a saint. It gave you and Joe some time to catch up and just talk. It was so nice getting to reconnect together with no other worries to bother you while youâre in the air. Being married to a star had its perks, having taken a private flight meant no needing to wait around in an airport full of strangers and a smooth arrival, avoiding baggage claim and a car waiting for you. Joe loaded in all of your bags while you got your son settled into his carseat, making your way from the tarmac to the hotel.Â
After a long day of travel, you got your son to settle down to bed somewhat easily. You were laid in in the hotel king bed when Joe came in fromÂ
You got up bright and early the next day, hoping to beat the rush of the crowd. Youâd also hoped you wouldnât be bothered, having the fast pass as well as going during an off peak time. Your son's face had lit up with excitement the moment he got inside the gates, wondering what someone as small as he was mustâve been thinking about everything around him. His entire childhood was right before his eyes.
âI wanna go on dumboâ he exclaimed, about to take off before Joe reached out to scoop him up into his arms, a fit of giggles ensuing.
âNot so fast little man, this isnât like the park at home we got to keep you close by. We can go on Dumbo, letâs go get in lineâ Joe said after he got him to settle enough to listen, his little arms flailing with elation at his dadâs word. You look at your two boys with a warm feeling in your chest, knowing today was the day you were going to tell him he wasÂ
After quite a few rides, it was getting to be lunch time. You could tell that your boys were hungry, knowing youâd need to stop for food soon if you were gonna keep at it for the rest of the day. Your little boy was starting to get a little hangry, ready to throw a tantrum when he was told to wait for his mouse ears hat he wanted. You assured him he would get it, after he got some much needed food in his belly. That was, until you realized this was the perfect opportunity for your reveal idea.
âHey hun, would you be able to grab us some lunch? Iâll wait for the hat to get made and meet you both at the tableâ you said, silently hoping he would abide by your request. The food court wasnât far from the stand, knowing he could keep an eye on you from a close distance.
âSure thing, want your go-to?â he asked, your boy in his arms resting on his side. You nodded, giving him a kiss of approval before he walked off to get some lunch. You exhaled a breath you didn;t realize you were holding in, knowing this would be a big moment for you two.
You got to talking with the park employee that was working the stand, explaining your idea to her and gushing over how cute it was going to be. You were going to have your sonâs name stitched into the front of the hat. On the back, you had her add in âBig Brotherâ, letting the reveal come from the little hat on your son's head. She got it back to you fairly quickly, the sight of it beginning tears to your eyes from how happy this life has made you.Â
You were excited to be growing your family with the man of your dreams, snapping yourself out of your thoughts to compose yourself. You were making your way to your family when your heart melted all over again. Joe and your son were sitting at a picnic bench, your son trying his hardest to reach the table on his own from the bench seat, but being lifted up by Joe to be sat on his lap. He seemed perfectly content with the new seat, easily able to reach his food on his own.Â
Joe looked up at you as you approached the table, a big grin across his face when you sat down. Your son had matched his energy, eyes lighting up when he saw you with the ears in hand.
âHey mamas, we got you some chicken tenders and friesâ Joe said while your son had cut him off âthose are your favorite, mine tooâ he said as he reached over to take some of your fries with his little hands. You laughed as he did so, pushing the small tray closer so that he could reach.Â
âI got your hat for you sweetheart, we can put it on after we eat. What ride do you wanna go on next?â you asked, hoping to keep his immediate focus off of the hat clutched in your hands. He placed his index finger on his chin, tapping as if he was deep in thought. He pointed his finger straight up with a look of surprise on his face when he must've made his decision.
âI wanna see Mickey Minnie castleâ he cheered happily. You couldnât say no, even if that was on the other side of the park from where you were currently. You and Joe exchanged looks, knowing one of you was going to be carrying him not too long into your walk.
As you got closer to the castle, your son was itching to walk. He looked absolutely adorable with his little ears on, seeing the secret stitched onto the back as you walked close behind your boys. You snapped a quick picture as they walked up to the castle, knowing this would be a memory you wouldnât want to forget.Â
When you reached the castle, you asked one of the many photographers around to get a photo of the three of you. The photographer snapped a couple of shots, thanking her and moving on before you made your move towards the reveal.Â
âJoe why donât you flip his ears around, I think there was something on the backâ you said nonchalantly as you stepped away from him. He tilted his head in confusion, but listened to your words. You watched as he slipped the elastic band from under your sonâs chin and turned the back to the front, pausing to read the words in front of him.Â
Joe turned his head slowly towards you as he processed the words âBig Brotherâ on your son's head. He seemed at a loss for words for a few seconds before he spoke up.
âAre you serious? Youâre pregnant again?â his voice hopeful as you saw tears begin to well in his eyes. You gave him a small nod as tears started to come up for you too. Joe took a few steps over to you with your son in his arms as he embraced you in as tight of a hug he could muster.
âIâm so damn happy baby, how long have you known?â Joe questioned, his voice full of adoration from the news.Â
âNot too long, itâs the whole reason I havenât been feeling well. Itâs been the hardest secret Iâve had to keep, you have no idea how badly I wanted to tell youâ you laughed lightly, watching him process and a realization cross his face.
âI knew you couldnât have gotten something from work that fast. God, Iâm so excited I get to go through all of this with you, this was such a cute way to tell me even though I wish I knew sooner so I couldâve been there for you moreâ he set your son down, giving you a one-armed squeeze while your son grabbed onto your leg.
âEverything you did and still do for me is perfect. Youâre an amazing dad to our little boy and I canât wait to see how you handle one more little boy or girlâ you said, giving him a kiss to add a finality to your words.
âIs it bad that Iâm hoping for a girl so we both can have our own little minis?â Joe asked while lifting your son onto his shoulders to give him a good view.
âI just know you would be an amazing girl dad if itâs anything like how you treat meâ you said, imagining Joe with your daughter and knowing how much he would spoil her.
âIf I treat you like my queen, I would treat her like my princess,â he said as you all looked up at the castle in front of you. Your life felt like a fairytale that you got to live with your dream man.

#joe burrow#cincinnati bengals#joe burrow bengals#joe burrow x reader#joe burrow imagine#nfl imagine#dad Joe burrow#husband Joe burrow#joe burrow fic#joe burrow fluff#burrowdarling requests
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THE ISLAND LOOKOUT (pt.13): his room - (smau & irl au) childhood bsf!rafe cameron x thornton!reader
series masterlist; general masterlist; taglist

an; my biggest apologies for not updating for so long!! schools been really busy recently but i have a vision for the story so no more long waits for new chatpers (i hope)!! also this chapter is again irl heavy
part 12 - part 13 - part 14
you sit there for a second, staring at nothing, before you finally reach for your phone. your fingers hover over the screen before you even know what youâre doing.

the response is immediate.
your breath catches in your throat.

thereâs something about that answer that makes your pulse stutter, but you push past it.

you hesitate before the next text, fingers tapping idly against your thigh.

three dots immediately appear, but disappear after a second. you exhale, waiting for the three dots to pop up again. your heartbeat is in your throat and you feel light headed as you wait.
thirty seconds.
thats how long it took for him to respond, and thats all it took for you to almost have a heart attack.

you donât give it any further thought.
you slip out of the room quietly, your pulse hammering in your ears. jj is already breathing evenly, half-asleep, and he doesnât stir as you pull the door open.
your path to rafeâs room is eerily quiet. your heartbeat is the only thing you can hear as you reach his door.

you hesitate outside the door for half a second before pushing it open. the room is dim, lit only by the soft glow of a bedside lamp. shadows stretch long against the walls, warping with the faint movement of the curtains in the breeze. rafe is sitting on the edge of the bed, elbows on his knees, head ducked low like heâs thinking too hard about something.
his head lifts when you step inside. he doesnât say anything. neither do you.
the door clicks shut behind you, and the quiet shifts. it feels heavier now, thick with something unspoken, something too solid to ignore. the kind of silence that isnât quite anger, but isnât far from it either.
you cross the room and sit down on the bedânot too close, but not far either. the space between you feels intentional. rafe exhales sharply, dragging a hand down his face. he looks tired, like he hasnât slept in days. the way he wonât look at you only makes the weight in your chest press harder.
"i just..." you start, then stop. your fingers knot together in your lap. "i wanted to talk about earlier."
rafe scoffs under his breath, shaking his head. "of course you did."
you blink at him, caught off guard by the edge in his voice. "what's that supposed to mean?"
he doesn't answer. his jaw clenches, shoulders tensing like he's holding something back.
"rafe," you say his name softer this time, reaching out without thinking, fingers brushing his wrist. he turns at that, eyes flicking to yours for the first time since you walked in. there's something behind themâsomething sharp, something unraveling.
then suddenly, his hand finds your jaw, fingers curling against your skin, and he kisses you.
it's too quick, too desperate. his lips press against yours like he's trying to make you forget why you're even here in the first place.
but you donât kiss back.
your hands press flat against his chest, pushing him away as your breath stumbles, heartbeat ricocheting inside your ribs.
âwaitââ the word comes out sharp, uneven. your head shakes on instinct, fingers pressing hard against your temples like you can physically stop yourself from spiraling.
"fuck, rafe. you cant justâ"
rafe pulls back, eyes searching yours with something raw, something desperate. his brows furrow like he canât understand why you stopped him, like he canât understand why it isnât that easy.
"can't what?"
the weight in your chest threatens to crush you whole.
his voice breaks the silence first, low and uneven. "this about jj?"
your throat tightens. your fingers dig into your arms.
he doesnât get it.
you shake your head, lips pressing together to keep them from trembling. âyou donât get to do that,â you whisper, voice barely holding together. âyou donât get to justââ
"get to what?"
the words catch. the lump in your throat grows thick, nearly choking.
your jaw clenches. âdonât do that.â
âdo what?â
âact like you donât know.â
he lets out a low, humorless laugh, shaking his head. âyou wanna talk about earlier,â he cuts in, voice clipped. âright?â
you hesitate, but nod. âyeah.â
his lips press together, his hands clasped so tight his knuckles go white. âof course you do.â
you blink, thrown. âwe talked for the first time in a month and you donât wanna talk about it?â
you cross your arms over your chest, pressing your fingers into your skin like you can hold yourself steady. "you wanna talk about it? yeah? how about we start from that night?"
your stomach flips. âwhat night?â
rafe exhales sharply, running a hand over his face. he shakes his head, jaw clenched.
"you know what fucking night," he snaps. "tannyhill. when we got high and posted all that shit."
you inhale sharply.
he shakes his head. "i woke up thinking it was something. thinking weâ" he stops himself, running a hand through his hair, exhaling hard.
"but then you started hanging out with the pogues." his voice turns bitter, edged with something almost venomous. "started running around with him."
your brows furrow. "him?"
his jaw flexes. "jj."
your breath catches.
rafe scoffs. "what, youâre gonna act surprised? like you werenât all over him?"
your stomach twists, anger flashing through your veins. "are you serious right now?"
"i donât know, roni. am i?" his voice is sharp, biting. "because it sure as hell looked like you were fucking around with him."
you shake your head, disbelief crawling up
"i woke up that morning, and it was likeâfuck, roni, it messed me up. you looked at me like nothing changed. like it was just another night, likeâ" he stops, running a hand over his face. "and then you were with them. with him. and i didnât know what to do with that."
your throat feels tight. the pressure behind your eyes builds, your chest getting heavier by the second.
âI mean, was it fun? Did he make you forgetââ
you barely hear him anymore. his words are background noise to the storm in your head, to the way your own thoughts are eating you alive.
because he doesnât know. he doesnât know what happened. he doesnât know that for a moment, you let it happen, let yourself fall into something you didnât even want, just because it was easy.
heâ s still going, voice sharp, edged with frustration. âyou couldâve been with anyone, but you picked him? really?â he laughs, but thereâs nothing funny about it.
your throat burns. you can feel the tear rolling your cheek.
rafe scoffs for the billionth time, about to keep goingâthen he the way your breath catches. the way your shoulders curl inward. the way your fingers tremble as you try, and fail, to wipe the tear away before he can notice.
he stops, eyebrows furrowing. âwhat the fuck? are you fucking crying?â
your hands are clenched in your lap, your teeth digging into your lip, your whole body tense like youâre trying to keep yourself together.
rafeâs irritation falters. his jaw tightens, and he leans in slightly, like heâs trying to get a better look at you. âdude.â
you shake your head quickly, trying to pull yourself together, but itâs useless. a tear slips down your cheek, and you swipe at it aggressively, frustrated with yourself.
âwhat is going on?â his voice is more calm now, but still filled with rage and confusion.âwhy are you crying?â
you shake your head quickly, like you can push away whateverâs clawing up your throat.
but you do. youâre crying because this is rafe, your best friend, and he feels like a stranger. because you love him, and because you donât know if youâre even allowed to anymore. because jjâs hands were on you hours ago, and you didnât want it, not really, but you let it happen anyway.
heâs watching you now, expression shifting, annoyance flickering into something else. something more careful.
you exhale sharply, voice breaking apart before you can even finish. âi didnât want to.â
his brows pull together. âdidnât wanna what?â
your fingers dig into your arms. you canât say it. you canât.
rafe leans in, voice lower, rough but steady. âuse your fucking words.â
but you canât.
your breath stumbles, and thenâeverything spills over.
your shoulders shake harder, silent at first, but then the sob hits, breaking past your lips in a way you canât stop. your hands press against your face, like maybe if you hide, this wonât be happening.
rafe hesitates. for half a second, he just looks at you, stunned, like he doesnât know what to do with this.
then he sighs, muttering a quiet, âfuck,â under his breathâbefore reaching for you.
he pulls you in, arms wrapping tight around your frame, and this time, you donât push him away.
your face presses into his shoulder, fingers curling into his shirt, gripping tight like itâs the only thing keeping you from falling apart completely. rafeâs warm. steady. too solid, too real.
he doesnât say anything. he was ready for you to fight back, to push him away, to bite out something sharp like you always do when youâre upset. but you donât. and for some reason, that unsettles him more than anything.
his pulse is still fast from the argument, his breathing uneven, but youâre shaking against him, and suddenly, none of it matters.
the room stays quiet, save for the sound of your breathing, rough and unsteady against his neck. after a moment, he exhales slowly, like heâs trying to even you out with him.
somewhere in the haze, his grip loosens. his thumb moves, slow and absentminded, over your back. maybe itâs instinct. maybe itâs something else.
the weight of the past few weeks lingers, thick in the air between you. nothing is solved. nothing is fixed. but somehow, the anger feels like a distant thing now, like something neither of you have the energy to hold on to.
your body stays tense for a while. you donât notice when it starts to ease.
and rafe doesnât notice when he stops thinking about why heâs still holding you.
before you know it, the exhaustion catches up. the weight in your chest dulls, your thoughts blur, and your grip on his shirt goes slack.
rafe feels the shift but doesnât move.
your breathing evens out first. then his.
before either of you can stop it, sleep settles in, pulling you under.
and for the first time in weeks, neither of you fight it.
tags: @italk2god @angelicameron @marleymarleymarleymarley, @queenvane64, @raeven-marie43 @idiotussupremus @sereneera @yesshewrites1 @inlovewithchriss @ethanthequeefqueen @amterasuu @popou61 @drewsstars @yannew @anothertimegirl @flvredcas @yootvi @mrsdrewstarkeyy @niaunofficial @cooper8224 @rafegetinmybed @pogueprincesa @6r4cie @adalia-lovelace @bee-43 @drewrry @masongetinmybed @defnotayonna @lcversvoid @my-name-is-baby @lolasangelz @polli05927 @laniirackssss @rafecameronswifeyy @starsval @hypnotizedstarkey @wintercrows @d-daxx @dontknow3m @jjasmiineee @Chillgal135
#the island lookout :cambankromyy#rafe cameron#rafe#rafe smau#rafe cameron smau#obx#outerbanks#outer banks#rafe cameron x reader#obx smau#rafe cameron smut#rafe smut#rafe cameron fluff#rafe fluff#thornton!reader#topper thornton#bsf!rafe cameron#childhood bsf!rafe#sarah cameron#jj maybank#jj maybank fluff#jj maybank smut#jj maybank x reader
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Paint Me Red
Synopsis: You and Damian like horror movies for the same reason.
Pairing: Dark!Damian Wayne X Dark!AFAB!Gn!Reader
Tw: 18+ pwp; Kinda gore?; Cannibalism kink? Definitely hinted; Biting link; Blood kink; Fingering; Watching straight porn; Torture porn? It's all fake and no oneâs suffering; Pain kink maybe; They are freaks and they are in love; Worshipping?; A hint of love-bombing? I repeat, they're freaks and they're in love, your honor; Mention of hipersexuality; Damian enjoys pain, gore and death, despite not killing anymore, Reader likes it too; Reader has long hair and is implied to be wearing a shirt or dress with straps and bare thighs; English isn't my first language.
Word count: 1,2k
Requested? No.
Extra notes: Inspired by the movie May and everyone who yaps about yandere!Damian being cannibal coded. I also love when someone writes Damian a little psycho, a little sadomasochist. And a Damian who worships his S/O is the best Damian!!! I recommend reading this while listening to Tear You Apart by She Wants Revenge. Not sure I like my writing here tho, especially the title, there were many good options that also seemed bad options
General masterlist
Damian was odd, you knew it from the start. Everyone who interacts with him knows it from the start.
That didn't stop you from being flustered when he confessed his â in his actual words â all consuming, undying love. You never thought anyone would actually use those words while declaring their feelings for someone, but as always with him, Damian was different.
And maybe you were different too.
You came back from your weekly date with him to the apartament you recently started sharing, despite being so young and having been dating for only a month when he asked. Your friends called it love-bombing. You had never heard of a more romantic term.
He took you to the bedroom as soon as you crossed the threshold, excited about a surprise he planned for you, but there was nothing different there, until he pulled his laptop out, fiddled with something, connected to the overhead projector you bought once on a whim, after watching a tiktok, only to realize it wasn't any better than just watching on your television or laptop. At least it wasn't as expensive as one would think.
Regardless, you still used it sometimes, even if for the sake of being spontaneous â and making your money worth it â, and your boyfriend was clearly looking for that.
You sat on the edge of the bed, and in less than a minute, Damian was sitting beside you, while a weird video started playing.
â I found it online, beloved. â Damian explained. â A short film, made by a group of independent artists, I think. â You nodded along, this level of cinephilia was not exactly your thing, but you did enjoy watching movies and leaving reviews on Letterboxd, if it caught Damian's interest, then it must be something.
â Yeah, very Texas Chainsaw Massacre. â You commented, not because it actually looked to be a horror movie, but more because of the quality of the camera, the eery atmosphere, and the scenario being filmed in the middle of nowhere. It seemed like an actually calm movie, but you knew something was up, there was only a young couple having a cute picnic.
Damian looked at you with wide, almost innocent eyes, boyish excitement coupled with some glint you couldn't identify.
â Exactly!
You felt some satisfaction and pride. You were the one who presented him with the classic slasher movies â one of your favorite genres â and were surprised by his eager acceptance of them, since a lot of them didn't have much quality. But he seemed interested in the death scenes and gore. Maybe it was the remnants of his childhood on him, but you didn't have that past and still related to him, much to his delight. He also commented about how unreal a lot of it was, from experience, no doubt.
It was almost cute. And hot.
Damian's hand laid on your thigh, while his thumb started rolling circles on your bare skin.
You let out a gasp when the girl in the movie, out of nowhere, bit hard on her boyfriendâs finger while he fed her a piece of pie with his hands. An exaggerated amount of blood started sliding down her lips and his hand, but he didn't scream, he just stared at her while she had mischief and desire in her eyes.
Damian's hand squeezed your flesh.
â How did you find this on YouTube? I'm pretty sure they wouldn't allow it there. â You wondered out loud, squeezing your thighs when the guy used his bloody hand to push the strap of her sundress down, revealing her supple breast. He leaned forward and peppered kisses down her chest, while pushing the other strap down, revealing her torso even more, until he bit her ribsâs flesh just as hard, face partially covered by her left tit.
Now, they were both smeared in lots of blood, from his hand travelling her body and the new wound.
â I did not mention YouTube. â He answered, and you hummed, paying extreme attention to the movie, intrigued, and half surprised to be turned on. But it was shallow, a thin layer of lust that went unnoticed by you, mistaken by intrigue and excitement.
You only noticed how hot you were, when Damian did the same thing to you. He slowly and deliberately got closer, pushed your hair back from your shoulder, and left wet, slow pecks down your neck, while pushing your straps down. You just stared at the images while he did his thing.
You were interrupted when he bit down on your shoulder, hard, leaving teeth marks, but not enough to bleed. You couldn't help the yelp of pain that escaped you by surprise, but didn't feel like reprimanding him when he soothed the feeling by still kissing you, and buried his hand between your legs, invading your underwear.
You opened your legs to give him more space, while your lips also parted to let out a deep breath, not out of nervousness, but anticipation. When you paid attention to the movie again, the guy was lying between the girlâs legs, leaving a nasty bite on her inner thigh. The blood dripped down and ruined her white underwear, but her boyfriend just started eating her out with the fabric still on the way.
Meanwhile, Damian played with your wet clit with his thumb while he inserted two fingers into your moist hole with ease, catching you both off guard with how wet you were with basically nothing. He had a hunch you would like his surprise, but not that much.
In need to let out some pent-up desire, he bit your flesh once more, this time above your breast. A low whimper of pain forced its way out of your throat. You looked down and noticed Damian's full-on boner.
You reached and pressed your hand against him, making him hiss and finally stop lapping at your skin, to look at you with desire. You kept eye-contact while rubbing him through his pants.
Damian pressed his lips to yours in haste, eager to taste your tongue while pumping his fingers faster and deeper against your walls, focused on abusing your sweet spot. The kiss was more sensual than ever, a dance which consisted in sharing heavy breaths, exchanged pecks, sucking lips and caressing tongues. While you both were like rabbits a third of the time, you being hipersexual and him being in love with you, the newfound shared taboo kink definitely turned things up a notch. And you expressed it by interrupting the kiss with a hard bite on his bottom lip.
Damian hissed like a cat until you let his lip go. When he glared at you, anyone would think he was livid like you just kicked his dog, but you knew him better than anyone. In fact, you were the only one to ever see him in the vulnerable side that came with intimacy, the only one he would ever want and trust to either lay beside his naked body, or willingly allow to leave a mark on his scarred flesh. Taste his muscles. Drink his blood.
He used his free hand to touch his lip, and found blood there. You licked your own, bright crimson and wet.
When he looked at you again, you wondered if you had finally ruined him for anyone else forever, and he made sure to paint both your faces red with a kiss, while he made you cum on his fingers.
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#dc comics#masterlist#damian wayne x reader#damian wayne#dark damian wayne#dark damian wayne x reader#robin#robin dc#dc robin#damian al ghul x reader#damian wayne al ghul#batman#tw smut#tw blood#tw cannibalism#tw biting#batfamily#batfam#dark reader#horror movies#is this yandere?#i'm not sure#I don't think so#they're just freaks#dark damian wayne x dark reader#tw pornography mention
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all mine â p.wb
series â.á [ kinktober masterlist ] content warning â.á smut! minors dni!, bf!wonbin, fem!reader, pet names, themes of cheating oops, failed attempt at angst?, first time mentions, unprotected sex, overstimulation. word countâ.á 2k+
a/n; sooooo this is unexpectedly lengthy.. i really wanna rewrite this some other time because i like the angst kajsdk wanted wonbin to be the mayor's son,,, but i don't want this to be THAT dark iykwim </3
you grew up in a small town where everyone knew each otherâs business. it was nice, you thought. the people you grew up around were the same people that helped shape you into the fine lady you were now.
it came as a shock and disappointment to everyone in your town when they learnt of your marriage to the recently town mayorâs son. the pure and innocent little girl they treasured was offered in exchange for the townâs growthâ it wasnât something you chose nor would you ever choose if you were given the chance, but you knew it was something you had to do.
the wedding was lavish, one would think it was out of love for the brideâ and yet you havenât even spoken to your groom-to-be at least once. you walked on thin ice the entire time, forcing a smile as you thanked the townspeopleâs half-hearted congratulatory remarks and goosebumps popping up the back of your neck as you linked your arm with his.
you wondered when it would end, letting out a relieved sigh when your now husband excused himself to greet some acquaintances. you lingered for a while, watching and listening to their disgusting remarks about you.
âyouâre a lucky man; your wife is young and spry!â
you felt disgusted, shivers running down your spine as they mindlessly babble away even when you were within earshot. you quickly excused yourself, choosing to ignore the fact that you were going to be unhappy with this marriage.
ây/n.â your heart dropped at the familiar voice, turning around with wide eyes. there stood someone youâd be regretfully leaving behind in light of this marriageâ your childhood friend and lover, wonbin. you looked around, making sure that no one else was there before running up to him. he smiled when he felt your warmth surround him, holding you close. he pulled away to look at your face, affection written all over his face.
âiâm sorry i took so long,â wonbin whispered, taking your hand in his, âi shouldâve been here. i shouldâve protected you.â
you stared at him as if you were trying to memorize his features, shaking your head as you smiled, âyou were chasing after your dreams, itâs not your fault. besides, it was my choice, bbin.â
wonbin frowned, clenching his jaw. he knew he was young and powerless, a mere fishermanâs son that was still trying to find his footing in the world. he regretted leaving you in this town, driven by the desire to find a decent job for the two of you, only to return and find out that you were no longer within his reach.
fate was cruel, but not cruel enough to completely keep you away from him.
âcome with me,â wonbin mumbled, eyes huge and glossy as he stared into yours. he held your hand up to his lips, pressing a kiss onto your knuckles. âplease, run away with me.â his voice was small, hot breath warming up your freezing hand.
you could only smile at him. you were old enough to know what you were doing, and that included the painstakingly long legal procedure that came with your marriage. you had nothing to lose, but you also had nothing to gain, and youâd even risk facing the townspeopleâs contempt if you ran off.
âyou know i canât, bbin,â you whispered, voice sounding sweet but it caused wonbin great pain.
he sighed, loosening his hold on your hand to wrap his arm around your waist. wonbin held you for a long time, face buried in the crook of your neck. you smelled nice, some scent he knows youâve never used before, wrapped in high-quality fabric that always covered your skin in rashes the day after.
wonbin wanted nothing more than to take this gaudy wedding gown off of you, eyes burning into yours as he pulled away. it was easy to tell that you were unhappy, that none of this was something you chose, looking like a stranger in your own wedding. a sigh escaped his lips, making up his mind to get you away from all this mess.
wonbin lifted you in his arms, finding yourself in a small, unused storage room at the end of the hallway. he nuzzled his face into your chest, holding you up against the wall. you patted his head, running your fingers through his hair. if only there was a way to give yourself to him, something specialâ
âtake me, wonbin,â you spoke hurriedly, voice breaking, âtake me before he could.â he stared into your eyes, the meaning of your words finally dawning on him. you smiled when you felt his breath hitch, âi want you to be my first, bbin.â
âfuck, if you say it like that,â he groaned, burying his face against your shoulder. you chuckled, seeing how red his ears had gotten. wonbin glanced at you, cheeks slightly flushed, âshouldnât you be mad at me if your first time was at your own wedding venue?â
you laughed, the sound tickling his ears. âthat would still be a better memory than my own wedding,â you reassured him, fingers combing through his sleek hair. he let out a shaky sigh, nodding as he turned his head towards your hand, placing a kiss on your wrist.
wonbin held you gently, lowering you down but never taking his hands off of you. he leaned in, chuckling before capturing your lips. you wrapped your arms around his neck, the slow kiss making your head spin the longer it went on. you gripped on his hair, making him pull away slightly.
you panted against his lips, eyes flickering down to see your lipstick staining them. you grinned, satisfied with the mark you left on him, pulling him back in for more. wonbin smiled against the kiss, letting you lead the pace this time.
the kiss was short, nibbling on wonbinâs upper lip as he pushes his tongue to break it off before trailing kisses down your neck. you sighed softly, brows furrowing. you felt his hand finding its way under your gown, shuddering when you felt his fingers against your sensitive inner thigh. wonbin let out a soft groan, nipping at your skin.
âcan you raise your leg up for me, baby?â wonbinâs voice became hoarse, sounding even deeper right against your ear. you bit your lip, shivers running down your spine when you parted your legs open, lifting your knee up to his waist. wonbin smiled, hooking his hand under your raised leg, using his other hand to caress your hips.
wonbin could feel your restrained moans against his shoulder, lipstick staining his white dress shirt. he held your cheek, pulling you away so he could see your face. wonbinâs cheeks were just as flushed as yours, glossy lips parted open. he smiled at your adorable state, teasingly prodding at your lips with his thumb.
âdo me a favor baby,â he whispered, âopen your mouth for me.â
you obediently followed, gasping when he pushed his finger inside. wonbin cooed at you, brows twitching at how warm your mouth felt along with the erotic expression you had on your face.
you swirled your tongue around his finger, blushing at the lewd act. âthatâs it, youâre doing so well,â he praised gently, tensing up as he pushed his finger deeper, now pressing on the roof of your mouth. wonbin felt you gag a little, prompting him to pull away completely. he quickly replaced his finger with his lips, kissing you deeply in an attempt to distract you from what he was planning to do next.
you felt his hand near your thigh once again, whimpering against his mouth when you felt his fingers near your core. he ran his finger down your slit, playing with your slick. wonbin pulled away, murmuring curses against your lips, âfuck, youâre wetter than i thought, baby.â
wonbin sighed into your neck, gently circling around your warm entrance. he eased his finger inside your walls, cooing at you when he heard your soft whimpers. âitâs okay, princess. just relax for me, yeah?â you buried your face against his neck, mewling at the slight stretch you felt.
he slowly curled his finger up, whispering praises as he continued to stretch you open. wonbin kissed your cheek, discreetly slipping a second finger inside. he covered his mouth with yours before you could let out a cry, the movement of his fingers mimicking the slow kiss that it made your head spin.
you whimpered, fists tightly gripping on his shirt at the pleasurable stretch. the moment wonbin felt your walls flutter, he pulled his fingers away before unbuckling his belt. you felt lightheaded, resting your cheek against his shoulder. you gasped sharply when wonbin raised your other leg, making you cling onto him, legs wrapped around his waist while your back was pressed flush against the wall.
âiâll be gentle, i promise,â wonbin mumbled with bated breath, the words he uttered sounding like a lie even to himself. the tip of his cock pressed against your wet entrance, moaning softly when you felt him slip it inside. he stilled inside, rolling his hips as he waited for you to relax around him.
âthank you, princess.â you cried out when he bucked his hips forward, thick length piercing through your core. wonbin mumbled praises along with apologies, panting from how much he was trying to pace himself. he supported your body with one arm, his free hand going up to fondle you through your gown.
your body was heating up, whimpering once the pain turned into pleasure. wonbinâs shallow thrusts soon became deep and fast, leaving you a crying mess as you struggled to cling onto his shoulders. âi got you, baby. you're all mine now,â wonbin murmurs in between thrusts, groaning your name against your skin.
your moans get louder, cries starting to echo in the room as wonbin began to slam his hips into yours. you clawed on his back, feeling his muscles tense up at the action. he hissed, biting on your shoulder in return.
âbbin,â you whined, walls convulsing around his cock. you felt warm, too warm, reaching a high youâve never experienced before. wonbin kept his face buried in your neck, mumbling about how amazing you felt around him. âbbin, itâs too much!â you cried out, nails digging into his skin. you felt overwhelmed, the heat from your lower stomach starting to rush throughout your body, making your head spin.
wonbin moaned into your neck, hands gripping tightly onto your hips. âlet go for me, baby. let me own you completely.â
you moaned his name, a gush of warmth coating your inner thighs and wonbinâs length as you reached your high. âfuck. fuck, y/n.â wonbin mumbled tiredly, hips jerking sensitively as he came soon after. you felt his warm seed deep inside you, whimpering from how overwhelmed you felt.
he held you for a long time, letting you cool down in his arms. when he felt your legs trembling, wonbin quickly helped you straighten your legs down. you kept your hold on him, making him chuckle as he leaned down to embrace you.
you could feel something warm dripping down your thighs, soon finding it unpleasant. you sighed, pulling back to look at his face. âi kind of get why this activity is done on a bed.â wonbin laughs softly, leaning in to kiss your cheek.
âguess thatâs my cue to bring you back to your house, then.â
the next few weeks after your wedding were sweet, sickeningly sweet. your lifestyle had changed so drastically, living in a house that was as wide as the fields you grew up in and as high as the townâs tallest utility pole. your new husbandâs life was hectic as he ran multiple businesses in and out of the town, leaving him no time to even speak to you, much less see you.
you took advantage of it, running to wonbinâs old house without a secondâs hesitation as soon as you wake up in the morning. even though it was regrettable that you didnât wake up in his arms, wonbin was already content that you kept coming back to him.
the small town where everyone knew each other worked in your favor, turning the other cheek whenever they saw you and wonbin roaming the streets with your hands intertwined. they were happy for youâ that was what you liked to think, making up for the time they failed to protect you.
#૮ > ⤠< ŕžŕ˝˛á#riize imagines#riize scenarios#riize x reader#riize au#riize smut#wonbin imagines#wonbin scenarios#wonbin x reader#wonbin smut#ddollemons#ddlz: pwb#â§ââş kinktober24
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Thinking about writing a sweet, gentleman with a high sense of justice... Have a Yan! Baker!
Reader's gender is ambiguous as it's never really stated and only assumed.
Yan! Baker who is your neighbor and also your favorite baker of the town! The man has just recently moved next door and started his own little business which is opening a bakery!
Yan! Baker who gingerly offered you a cutely wrapped box of cookies as some sort of housewarming gift. One bite and you immediately fell in love with his creations! It's the best cookies you've ever had and the next day you saw him open his bakery, you were the first customer to line up for his cookies.
Yan! Baker who often gives you extra for every purchase you make, a little tad too much sometimes to be considered an extra. A juice for a piece of bread, a box of confections for a box of macaroons, and a box of luxurious-looking chocolate for a jar of cookies.
"My treat for someone so gorgeous like you." He eased you down with his smooth voice as you fidgeted at the extra he gave you. His smile was so genuine that you thought he might have taken a liking to you. But that couldn't be true right? He had a ring wrapped around his finger after all. He's most likely to be married already but you have never asked him that.
You thanked him and decided to pop off your curiosity today by asking him about his marital status.
"Me? Ahaha, yes I am not married yet, just engaged."
Perhaps your expression shifted too fast to the point he patted your shoulder, "... I really love them, I was once their prince in shining armor."
You cocked your head to the side while trying your best to make a chuckle at his word prince.
"Mmh, a literal prince might I say," Noel now wrapped both his hands on your shoulder, guiding you inside the bakery while spinning tales for you to hear to the point you didn't realize that the front rolling door was shut.
"A long time ago, this town was once a bustling village of an empire."
He sat you down at the kitchen table while preparing some tea for you to drink, somehow your mind fogged by his smooth voice.
"I had a twin brother and one of us was supposed to be the next Emperor but you see," Noel stirred the teabag into the pot, "I was not chosen by the die and my younger brother instead was raised to be the Crown Prince."
Is Noel a writer? You thought to yourself.
"But I didn't mind it at all, I received just a fair amount of love and attention from my family. I was slow in studying unlike my brother so I honed my skill in weaponry instead."
"So you were a knight?"
Noel nodded. You nodded slightly as well.
"I was a royal knight who was meant to guard both the country and my brother. But you know what?" Noel placed a tray of cookies, your favorite. "I grew up with not only my brother but also my beloved."
"Childhood friends?"
"More than that. They were one of my mother's lady-in-waiting and also my brother's closest friend and me."
A woman, you noted.
"Long story short, we grew up and got engaged, just like a fairytale." Noel picked the strawberry with his fork and ate it, since when did he bring it? And since when were the teas served already? His voice...
"But my brother was not pleased with it, he was envious, drowned in an ugly shade of envy." You could hear the irritation in his voice a tad too clear, a voice that you had never expected to hear from him.
"I was discharged from my duty momentarily due to a leg injury from a dispatch. It didn't bother me at all until I realized I had no hope of recovering completely, making my mother strip me of my duty permanently."
"But guess what, it turned out my brother was ecstatic about this news. He sent me away to be some preacher which automatically cut off my engagement. I didn't even have the chance to explain myself to them, only through letter could I apologize."
Was it his voice that lulled you deeper into the tale to the point you could see yourself in the setting or was it the cookies?
"Erickson swooped my love away and made them the Empress. They both reigned the empire into glory until I came in."
Chill ran down your spine, and the room that was originally normal suddenly felt hot.
"According to the prophecy, one of us three would be the downfall of the empire." Noel pointed between himself and you. Your waist felt so tight out of a sudden as though a corset was tightly wrapped around you. You wheezed from how the lack of oxygen and your eyes teared up from the smoke.
"Me, Erickson, or you. The Priest, the Emperor, or the Empress. The Knight, the Crown Prince," Noel brought your hand to his lip, "or the Jester."
An identical ring to his was slid into your finger, it fit like a charm, not too tight and not too loose.
The once small kitchen shifted into a spacious bedroom lit by a blazing scarlet that consumed the whole room. The heat was so much for you that you could somehow feel your skin melting.
Two heads were laid on top of your lap, and both of them shared the same scarlet hair, their face was not really clear but you could see them peacefully resting against you as their final resting place.
Just before you lost sight of everything and blacked out, Noel's kiss brought you back to reality. Kiss.
"I've been waiting for you for so long." The room shifted back to normal and you were on the bed with him above you. "Millennium, I waited for you for millennium and when I found you, I couldn't contain the feelings that were stored in the ring."
It turns out that your baker next door is not just some baker. He was your knight, your fiance, and your--
"But now, I can finally share this long locked suffocating feeling and fate with you." Noel muttered into your lip.
Diary Entry.
#Yandere x Reader#CatboX#Noel the Unbent#x GN Reader#I think this is more of just an OC posting content of a what if scenario
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Fem!kaiser and fem!ness with a cold reader
A/n:I've decided that I'm gonna do a blue lock post basically every week (or just when I feel like it) because again it's my current obsession. I wrote this because I am currently freezing to death (when am I not?) And i didn't feel like doing a request (the next bllk posts will probably be requests though) I chose kaiser and ness because i assume it's colder in Germany.
Fem!Michael kaiser

Michelle is naturally used to the cold. She has a higher body temperature and she had nothing no cover herself with when she was a child so she's used to it
She also already knows that you don't do well with the cold. She saw you shiver and freeze a lot during those cold days spent together in the streets of Berlin when you were children who only had each other (I love childhood friends to lovers kaiser and will mostly write for her with that in mind or implied)
But she still definitely teases you for being unable to withstand a bit of cold temperatures. She doesn't actually mind, though, since she thinks you look adorable bundled up in blankets
She doesn't like seeing you uncomfortable, so when she sees the temperature is getting colder and you're shivering, she asks you to cuddle and tells Ness to bring a blanket
You two just cuddle and watch whatever football match is going on, with kaiser constantly complaining about every mistakes the strikers do and saying how you two could do so much better
If there's no match currently going on, you'll just watch the highlight reel of your most recent match while she's constantly complimenting you on every action you did during the game (she expects you to do the same)
She also likes to take long warm baths with you. It's an opportunity to warm up and get even more comfortable together. You don't do much most of the time. Just wash each other and talk about whatever comes to your mind, it's one of the more relaxing and calm things you do in your relationship and it's also perfect to make yourself warm
If you have to play during a cold day or in a cold place kaiser complains to noa about it, while he looks at her like "wtf am I supposed to do about it" but then gives you some gloves specially made for the cold to help you
"Schatz, are you really that bothered by a bit of cold, I thought you'd be used to German weather by now"
"I think you of all people should know how I am with cold temperatures"
"Don't worry I know, should I ask ness to bring a blanket or two?"
"Yeah I'd like that thanks"
"Of course, anything for you, schatz."
Fem!Alexis ness

This girl is literally the definition of would do anything for you. It's genuinely concerning how fast she says yes to anything you ask her
You could literally ask her to help you hide a body, and she'd somehow already have a shovel and know a perfect spot to do it. Your happiness is literally the most important thing in the world to her, and she will do literally anything to make you happy
So the exact moment she saw you shiver even once she already went to grab 3 heated blankets, the softest pillows in all the buildings, and two cups of your favorite hot drink that she somehow made in record time
Cuddling is one of her favorite things to do with you (don't ask her which one is her favorite she genuinely couldn't decide) and the fact that it's cold means that she gets to cuddle with you basically always. Cuddling with Alexis genuinely fells like heaven she's so damn warm and comfortable it's insane. She also can adapt to whatever your cuddling preference is. If you like being the little spoon, then she's an amazing big spoon and the same goes for the opposite. She's at least top 3 best cuddlers in blue lock change my mind
If you have to go anywhere when it's cold she'll offer to go instead because she doesn't want you to get sick or even slightly uncomfortable with the cold. But if you do have to go then she comes with you, tells you to wear warm clothes and holds your hand the entire time both to warm it up and because she loves doing it
If you have to play in the cold then she tries her best to make you comfortable, including bringing hot tea in a thermos so she can give it to you to drink during break time
"Are you alright y/n? Do you need anything else?"
"N-no it's fine lexi, I already have everything I need"
"Are you sure? More tea, maybe? Are the blankets warm enough? Should I put on a movie? Or maybe a match? Do you-"
"Lexi please calm down I'm fine it's not a big deal"
"But you told me you didn't like the cold, I'm just doing anything I can to make you warm and comfortable liebling"
".....I swear every day I fall more in love with you, do you wanna cuddle? I'm sure your love will warm me right up"
"Awww thanks so much y/n, I love you so so so so so so so much, of course I'll cuddle you, the cold has nothing on me, especially if It's for you"
#blue lock x reader#blue lock#bllk x reader#bllk#michael kaiser#michael kaiser x reader#micheal kaiser#micheal kaiser x reader#kaiser x reader#kaiser#x reader#alexis ness x reader#alexis ness#ness x reader#ness#gn reader#female kaiser x reader#female kaiser#female ness x reader#female ness#genderbent kaiser x reader#genderbent kaiser#genderbent ness#genderbent ness x reader#michael kaiser x you#michael kaiser x y/n#fem kaiser#fem kaiser x reader#fem ness#fem ness x reader
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the same tv
words: 1.8k
warnings: 18+ only, smut, unprotected sex, p in v sex, parent death, funerals, robbery, redemption/forgiveness, addiction, drinking (wine, not like hard drinking), tickling, cockwarming, they call themselves kids at one point but at no point are reader or rafe under 18, like itll make sense once you read it in context
the first thing you do when you enter your house is kick off your shoes. the next is to stop holding back your tears as they stream down your face. you can't even sob anymore, just silent, steady tears.
you sigh as you look around the entryway. there's been some changes since you moved away, despite only being out of your parents house for a little over a year. they replaced the grand portrait that was of your mom's parents with one of you, now taking the place of honor.
you look away before you get to the rest of the family photos. you've seen enough at the funeral. you walk further in to the house, bare feet against the shiny wood floor.
you pause when you hear something further in. you haven't forgotten how the old house seemed to speak, groaning and settling during strong winds or when too many people were crammed between it's walls.
this sound seems different, but you're also occasionally sniffling, your ears are shot from blasting music in an attempt to distract yourself, so you shrug it off and walk further into the living room.
the sound suddenly makes sense as you see someone stood in your living room, arms holding up your parents flat screen television, awkwardly trying to carry it.
you aren't even mad. you honestly don't care about the tv. or the fact that someone is trying to rob you.
you let out a bitter laugh before you sink to the floor. âof fucking course this happens.â you are glad you still have your purse slung from your shoulder as you pull your wallet out, quite aggressively throwing it at the robber who has now frozen.
âwhat?â he questions, lowering the tv to the ground and pushing his hood of his head, a dumb move for someone currently committing a crime.
âthis has been the worst week of my life and now you're robbing me. just my fucking luckâŚâ you let out a broken sob. âjust take whatever you want and leave.â
the only things that matter to you still in the house aren't actually worth anything anyways. the photos of your parents, your dad's cologne that's half empty, the oak tree that your childhood dog is buried next to.
âi thought the people who lived here died.â
you pick your head up, a look of fury overtaking your face.
âthey did. they're my fucking parents! and now they're gone and you're fucking robbing me! get the fuck out!â you stand up, pushing at the robbers chest.
he looks familiar, like you should know who he is but can't place him.
âim-shit. im sorry.â he says, allowing you to shove him away and out the door.Â
âim really fucking sorry!â he yells again before you slam the door shut.
-- years later --
you park your car in the driveway instead of pulling it all the way into the garage like you know you should, but you need to know if you're correct about the man sitting on your front step.
âyou're the kid that tried to rob me.â you say as you walk the sidewalk to the porch.
âyes.â he says, looking ashamed and a whole lot more grown up. âi was an addict and i owed a debt. my dad had just kicked me out of the house and i was on my own for the first time. it was stupid of me, but when i heard the people living here died, i thought it'd be a victimless crime.â
he sighs deeply, like even just thinking back to that time physically hurts. âi didn't even think that someone could have inherited the house. im so, so sorry.âÂ
he swallows thickly. âmy mom died when i was young. my dad- my dad just died recently. he faked his death and i got him back, but he's actually gone this time. you know what you said about the worst week in your life?â
you think back those years. it's mostly a blur, especially the days surrounding your parents car crash and funeral, but you do remember breaking down in front of the robber. you nod gently, waiting to hear the end of his speal.
âi know what you mean now. and im sorry i hurt you. im sorry about your parents dying.â he pulls something out of his pocket, extending his hand.
you look into his open palm, realizing it's a ornate gold necklace.
âno.â you shake your head. âyou keep it. you don't need to bribe me to forgive you.â
âi want you to have it.â he says. âit's⌠it's not a lot, but it's something. something to help make up for what ive done.â
you reach forward, carefully taking the necklace out of his outstretched hand, carefully not to accidentally bump his skin.Â
âthank you.â you say, admiring the way the sun gleams off the metal.Â
âim rafe, by the way. rafe cameron.â
ây/n.â you respond, undoing the clasp of the necklace.
âhere, let me.â he takes it out of your hands, moving quicker than you can think as he steps around you. your hair is already up in a bun, so rafe is able to reach around and easily place the chain around your neck.
âthank you.â the weight of the necklace feels comfortable against your skin, like it's the last finishing touch you need. you are wearing your mother's earrings, your father's bracelet, and now you have the other piece of what made that time in your life so miserable, your robbers necklace.
âi⌠i guess ill be going now.â rafe says.
you turn and watch him walk away. you recognize so much of your former self in him, the clear grieving he's going through.
âare you sober now?â you call out before he reaches the end of your driveway.
âsober enough.â he shouts back. rafe doubts he'll ever truly be clean, but he can at least manage now, doesn't need the drugs like he used to.
âthen come back for dinner tomorrow. we can talk.â
you can see the smile stretch over his features. âill be there.â
-- three months later --
âshit.â rafe says, head snapping over to you. âthis is the same tv.â
you giggle and nod, surprised it took him so long to realize. âi never really watch tv on the actual tv, so no need to replace it.â you shrug, the gold necklace still draped over your neck. you haven't taken it off except to shower and sleep.
âgod, thats crazy.â rafe looks over to you. âimagine if we just talked back then.âÂ
you shake your head. âyou just think you want that because we get along now. we were both in bad places.â
âyou don't think we would have been hooking up back then?â rafe asks, raising an eyebrow at you, watching the way your thighs press together at the mere mention of hooking up, already feeling the urge to sleep with rafe even after having sex only a couple of hours ago.
âwe were two scared kids. if we were hooking up we definitely shouldn't have been.â you giggle, reaching your wine glass out for rafe to refill, which he is glad to pour a more than healthy amount in.
âand now?â rafe looks down at his lap.
âand now we are two slighty less scared slightly older kids.â you giggle again, taking a deep sip before leaning across the couch cushion to press a kiss to rafes cheek, the movie you had put on long forgotten.
ârafe.â you wait until he looks you in the eye. âim here for you.â
âgod, what have i done to deserve you?â rafe wraps his arm around your waist, pulling you on top of him as he flops back onto the couch.Â
you let out a laugh before it's cut off with his lips. he kisses you heavily, hand against the back of your head, not allowing you to pull away, not that you want to.
you let himself get lost in your kiss. you wish you had someone to support you in the time you needed most, and you're determined to be that person for rafe now.
rafe easily dominates your mouth even though he's underneath you as you quickly work your shorts off, wiggling against him until your bottom half is nude.
you press against rafes crotch, still covered by his sweatpants. you feel his cock straining against the fabric as you rub your pussy against it, wetting the gray material.
âbaby, please.â rafe groans. he would pull his cock out himself, but his hands are preoccupied holding you close to him as if his life depends on it.
âoh, now you don't like teasing?â you smile.
âalright, i deserve this.â rafe also manages a chuckle despite his straining erection. âbut please. need to feel your pussy âround me.â
âalright.â you roll your eyes dramatically. you'll have to get revenge on rafe at a different time for edging you the other night.
you push his pants down his thighs until you're able to reach into his underwear and pull out his cock. you give him a few quick strokes before lining up your entrance and sinking down.
rafe let's out a moan, barely pulling his face away from yours. âyou're so wet.â
âit's almost like i like you or something.â you roll your eyes.
rafe laughs before kissing you again, hand moving up to your hair, tangling his fingers between the strands.
you sit on his cock for a moment, adjusting, before beginning to move, up then down, up then down, subtle movements of your hips, not needing anything fast, wanting drawn out, wanting it to last.
the movie is long over by the time rafe finally cums, a hand finally moving down to rub your clit to make sure you get off at the same time as his.
by the time you're both satisfied, you're sweaty and exhausted. you don't even bother to pull off his cock as you rest your head against his chest.
âthank you.â rafe says softly, rubbing his hand over your back. you don't need to ask what for. you know. for being there. you'll always be there.
you look up at him, a small smile on your face. âhow are we gonna tell people we met?â
things are quickly getting serious, and while he hasn't breached the subject with you yet, neither of you have been hiding how quickly you're falling.
âwhat, you think it's a problem that we met when i was robbing you?â rafe says, making you giggle, only intensified by his hand pressing into your side, fingers tickling you as you howl with laughter.
rafe flips you over onto your back so you're underneath him, keeping his cock pushed inside of you.
âmaybe we should just tell people we met on tinder.â rafe shrugs.
you roll your eyes. âsomehow that's more embarrassing.â
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Hi, this is the first time I've sent an ask here on Tumblr so I'm a little (Very) nervous but anyway I just love your art, I love with all my strength your antinous and telemachus design. I recently saw on your blog about the Amphinomus x Telemachus ship and I thought well, it's been a while since I wrote it last time so I decided to make a mine oneshot.
(I'm Brazilian so maybe some things I write don't make sense, but I hope you can understand)
The great hall of Ithacaâs palace buzzed with noise. Goblets of wine clinked, laughter echoed too loudly, and the scent of roasted meat mixed with the fresh flowers Penelope insisted on replacing every day.
To Telemachus, it was hell.
He leaned against one of the marble columns, arms crossed, eyes scanning the room with barely concealed distaste. And yet, despite himself, his gaze kept drifting back to Antinousâthe worst of his motherâs suitors.
And still, Telemachus couldnât help it. The confidence, the way Antinous spoke, the sharp smirk on his lips⌠it was hypnotizing. Disgusting. And it made Telemachus feel sick.
âYou really enjoy suffering, huh?
The voice was quiet, amused.Amphinomus had appeared beside him, leaning casually against the same column.
Telemachus flinched, tearing his eyes away from Antinous as if heâd been caught committing a crime.
âWhat do you mean?
âYou look at him like you're under a spell, but also like you want to rip his head off. I canât tell if I should feel sorry for you or laugh.
Amphinomus grinned, and Telemachus felt a strange warmth in his chest.
He was different from the others. Though he had grown up alongside Antinous and Eurymachus, he never seemed as cruel.
âI hate him. â Telemachus muttered.
âThen why do you keep looking at him like that?
Telemachus had no answer.
Later that night, Amphinomus sat beside Antinous and Eurymachus, half-listening to their drunken chatterâuntil something made his blood freeze.
âThat brat is a nuisance,â Antinous sneered. Once he returns from his little voyage, we kill him. And the queen...
Eurymachus chuckled, raising his goblet.
âShe wonât have a choice. Sheâll be ours, whether she wants it or not.
Amphinomus felt his stomach turn.
He looked at his childhood friends and, for the first time, truly saw the darkness in them.
This wasnât right.
Without thinking, he shot to his feet and strode out of the hall. No one seemed to notice his sudden departure, but he couldnât care less. His steps carried him straight to Telemachusâs chambers, where he knocked frantically.
The door opened, revealing a drowsy and confused Telemachus.
âAmphinomus? Whatâs wrong?
Amphinomus swallowed hard.
âTheyâre going to kill you.
Telemachusâs confusion vanished, replaced by shock.
âWhat?
âTheyâre planning your murder. And⌠and something worse for your mother.
The color drained from Telemachusâs face.
âYou⌠youâre joking, right?
â Do I look like Iâm joking? â Amphinomusâs voice cracked.You have to leave, or prepare to fight. But you canât let them catch you off guard.
Silence.
Then, to Amphinomusâs surprise, Telemachus stepped forward, resting a hand on his shoulder.
âThank you.
Before Amphinomus could react, he felt something soft against his cheek.
A kiss.
His face immediately turned scarlet.
âTelemachus?
The prince only smiledâone of those rare, genuine smiles.
âYou're the only one of them with honor.
Amphinomus opened his mouth, but no words came out. His heart pounded like a war drum, and he stood there, frozen, feeling the warmth of the kiss linger on his skin.
He was happy as hell.




OOOOH STOP WHY IS THIS SO GOOOD !!! the comic artist in me is SCREAMING for me to turn this into a comic but my schedule would not allow it. DAMN IT !! I LOVE THIS SM AAAAAH 5 stars 10/10 YES!!! the way you wrote telemachus ??? The way you wrote amphin omg it was SPOT ON.
#fanfic#bearwolf#wolfbear#epic the musical#amphinomus x telemachus#epic#antinous#the suitors#eurymachus#amphinomus#telemachus
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ÂĄShidouâs hcs and character analysis!
tw// childhood trauma, violence, reference to possible SA in his past, my writing cause I didnât proffered this
PHYSICAL TOUCH!! Friends, lovers or even just acquaintances, he has the bad habit of seeking touch, small or big doesnât matter. From shoving to fidgeting. Itâs different obviously base on the relationship you have with him. Are you two friends? Expect playful shoves, ruffling each otherâs hair, if sat together legs or shoulders will touch casually. He is the type of person to laugh and slap your shoulder while laughing.Â
If you two are lovers: hand holding (he does that thing of rubbing his thumb on the back of your hand), kisses, hair ruffling, legs intertwined, hugs from the back, nibbling/biting. Pressing his forehead against yours. SQUEEZES. Especially if you have more fat on you, he would *love* it. The need to hold you close and squish your rolls or chub.Â
I personally see him as unlabelled. I know a lot like to hc him as gay. And it does make sense, but one can flirt with guys and it doesnât erase the possibility of being into women too. That said, I do believe he has a preference for guys, especially aesthetically, but ultimately his choice of a partner would be base on mental compatibility and aesthetic attraction, no gender. I feel he is into someone who truly enjoys being their true self and doesnât conform to society norms, more on this in a sec.
He is complex, as we see glimpses of this in the âegoist bibleâ and during his internal dialogue (like in the U20 arc). I donât think he would be a bad boyfriend, but neither would he be perfect. Objectively speaking, he does have a rough, almost explosive side. But thatâs a side he brings onto the football field. How he is outside of football we donât really know. He is shown to be someone who values uniques, and also strength, complimenting other players strengths. He is not a demon, he just so happens to be a human with a deep complex personality. He seems to value peace in his life outside of football, which is something you donât expect from him. Because he gets presented as this brute individual and yet he is the same who pops out this answers: âWhat made you cry recently?â At the end of the day when I become nothing, tears come out.
âWhat will you do on your last day on earthâ Watch it as it reaches its end
âHow would you spend your day off?â Be free from everything and become nothing
His answers are, intense, are they not? Which leads me to several thoughts. 1) He is very lonely. Using humour and anger to defend himself, a common trait of children who were abused, neglected in their childhood.
2) base on this, I feel in a relationship he would enjoy someone who has similar vibes to him but ultimately is different. Someone he can be chaotic with, someone he can laugh as loud as he wants, someone with who he can gossip and still have deep conversations at the same time. Ultimately, an artistic partner would be the best. Not only because he is into art, mostly as a way to cool down and shut down his brain, but because an artist or even a writer can see the world under different shades of colours rather than in greyscale. Classical introverted x extrovert duo, with the exception that the introvert individual becomes as extrovert as him when they are alone. His partner is his ancor. He will need to feel at peace from the turmoil inside of him.Â
3)his home life was not the happy kind. Now, this has been long speculated and I will give my 50 cents on the matter. Letâs analyse his favourite movie, manga and song:Â
Music > hide. Especially "Pink Spider"Â
Movie > "A Clockwork Orange"Â
Manga > "Chainsawman"
On the base line all three explore the darker sides of humanity, the need for personal freedom, and the consequences of defying societal norms. They create a raw and intense narrative about self-destruction, survival, and transformation.
But if we dive deeper > the movie mainly depicts SA, itâs a twist mix of violence, societal injustices and lack of free will⌠âChainsaw manâ itâs all about violence, power imbalance and manipulation. Denji was a tool from the start to end (again, lack of free will). The song, explored themes of internal chaos, the darkness in humanity, destruction and emotional turbulence and the psychological tool that that violence and abuse leaves on people. I mean⌠can it be any more obvious? His whole character is shown to be this brute, rude, violent individual but slowly we are being feed details into his insight. Like how deeply philosophical he is, artistic and yet he is genuinely over sexualised. Maybe is a reach, but I donât think that movie, the song and the manga choice are casual. They are a mirror image into the possibility that his childhood was pretty much terrible. That his sexual comments, which come off as almost distasteful, and feel icky in a way, are a projection of what he went through. Trying to use a distorted sense of humour and the violence he grew up with, to shield himself from whatâs his personal life and past.
Like when he was locked up, his reaction was intense. He was close to begging to be set free. Againâ lack of freedom, he hates not being able to be free. Something could have been taken away from him in the past. Maybe is as simple as a culture thingâ as we know Japan is a rather modest country with certain unspoken rules. Its traditional outlook on things such as gender and sexuality are the total opposite of Shidouâs persona. His appearance is loud, his personality is loud and it alls screams âlook at me Iâm hereâ and yet at the end of the day he is still a lonely being.
I recently reread the U20 chapter where he enters on the field. His inner monologue he uses biology (specifically fertilization) as an analogy to scoring. Many people interpret it as him making a connection to sex, but for me, it didnât read as such. Maybe itâs my literature student nerd ass, but, I took from his inner monologue a sense of need in terms of leaving a mark onto this world. He speaks how art leaves a mark, so does books, buildings and obviously children, showing the family legacy. Proof that something existed before them.
Shidou feels that his legacy, his needs, are validated through scoring. He feels seen, people are cheering. He is leaving a mark. Which ultimately could be validating a lack of emotional attention he received when he was a child. To me, all of these references and the constant sexual innuendos are a meaning for something deeper. We saw how each character with a heavy backstory has a trait or something in them that screams âsomething is not rightâ. Like Rinâs personality being a result of what happened between him and Sae. Canât think of anything else to add, maybe I will add something later. If you have any opinions, I am more than willing to read them!! Feel free to reblog/comment :))
#Glamourscatwriting#blue lock#shidou ryusei#shidou x reader#blue lock shidou#bllk shidou#shidou headcanons#character analysis#character angst#blue lock headcanons#bl Shidou#headcannons#my headcanons#anime and manga#blue lock manga
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you and daryl are incredibly similar. sometimes that isnât a good thing.
CW: 18+ MDNI
A/N: herbalist reader is one of my favorite pairings for daryl, iâll probably end up writing more of them specifically. anyways, this is for the anxious (me) over thinkers (also me)!
you and daryl hadnât been together very long. months starving on the road had brought you closer, him hunting constantly to feed the group and you analyzing and collecting every edible leaf and berry right alongside.
the hunter and the herbalist. terms like âgirlfriendâ and âboyfriendâ seemed a bit childish to both of you, given that you werenât teenagers anymore, but you were partners through and through. to some, you were an unlikely pair, but your group understood the many ways you intersected.
youâd grown up damn near just as rough as he did, with an abusive mother and a father who drank himself to death trying to cope. itâd been a lonely childhood, and you spent most of it outdoors, falling in love with nature.
your similarities made your relationship strong and laid the foundation for understanding each another, but sometimes it made for a worse situation, like now.
you and daryl laid next to each other on your cot, pressed together from the lack of space. it wasn't uncomfortable, but the charged awkwardness that had lingered between the two of you recently soured the air.
you couldn't see daryl's face, but you knew from the irregular rise and fall of his chest that he wasn't asleep. the cell was dark save from the strip of moonlight peeking around the sides of the privacy sheet.
you sighed silently, only your shoulders moving with the expression, but it didnât go unnoticed.
daryl pulled away from you, leaning as far out of your embrace as he could without falling off the bed.
âwhat?â he mumbled, voice gruff. you could hear his confusion, and it made you wince.
ânothing, just,â you paused. for a moment, you considered letting it go. he would come to you when he was ready. or he wouldnât if he truly hadnât enjoyed it. or if he wasnât really interested in sex. but would that mean he hadnât really wanted to do it with you? or that he had, god forbid, felt pressured?
no, you steeled your resolve, you would not let this overthinking and anxiety overtake you anymore. it was just a question. you could ask a question.
you pushed yourself up onto your elbow and, reaching over daryl, flicked on the oil lamp that sat on your makeshift nightstand. you blinked as your vision adjusted, finally bringing daryl into view.
staring just below his eyes, you blurted out your ailment, not wanting to allow yourself time to bow out.
âdid you not like having sex with me? when we did a few weeks ago,â you kept your voice low, though you were sure most everyone was asleep.
daryl had already been frowning, but it deepened at your words, âwhatâre you talkinâ about?â
and out came the word vomit.
âwell i just mean that, yâknow, we havenât had sex again since that first time, which was great. i really enjoyed myself, and i thought you did too, but then you never mentioned it and you never tried to do it again, and iâm thinking maybe you just arenât into sex? which is fine! but then itâs also not, because that would mean i either forced you or you felt like you had to have sex with me, which isnât cool, andââ
daryl cut you off with a hand over your mouth and you opened your eyes at the interruption, never even realizing you had closed them during your rambling.
meeting darylâs eyes, you saw shock and amusement melting the confusion right off his expression. a blush was starting to bloom across his cheeks.
âi didnât mean to leave ya hanging,â he said, âI guess i was in my own head too. thought ya would come to me when ya was ready.â
âwhen i was readyâŚâ you trailed off, dumbfounded.
all that overthinking, just for you both to be in the same place.
âainât wanna force ya or nothinâ,â he clarified at your expression.
you stared at him in shock for a moment, and then you were moving, surging up from the cot and swinging your leg over to straddle his waist. your hands settled on his deliciously firm shoulders for balance.
darylâs hands roamed over your hips, slipping underneath your his loose sleep shirt to press into your skin. his head bowed to lay against your neck, whispering, âi always want ya, babe,â as his lips peppered kisses up your throat and over the soft curve of your jaw.
you could feel him getting hard beneath you where he was pressed against the thin cotton of your panties. you started getting wet in response, hoping, albeit naively, that he wouldnât be able to feel it.
darylâs hands tightened on your hips, encouraging you to grind down against him and you followed his lead easily. a moan bubbled out of your mouth unbidden at the feeling. you werenât going to last long, not with the pressure just right and just where you needed. it had been too long.
your man, just as needy as you, was in the same position. his head rested back against the wall, lips parted on a moan of his own as he controlled your pace, rolling your hips down again and again against his.
you felt your orgasm starting in your belly and you slumped forward, hips stuttering as you rode it out. the fabric of darylâs shirt muffled your whimper.
stuck in his shirt as you were, you couldnât see darylâs face when he came, instead feeling him shudder and his hips jerking sporadically once, twice, and then stilling all together. he hissed out his release, hands tightening like a vice around your hips before he let you go.
you hid your smile against his shirt.
later, after you and daryl had changed into different bottoms and laid back down on the cot, you drifted easily into sleep for the first time in weeks, your mind quieted.
being so well sated was a bonus, though, and, by the quiet snores daryl was making, tucked against your chest, you figured he would agree.
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