#i think about this a lot yall r gonna have to cope

[legend-had-it]

4ever yearning for a fic where zoro and sanji are in-canon childhood friends and theyre like, exactly the same, but small

i want zoro to show up to the baratie [kuina and koushirou took him] and Instantly pick a fight with sanji, and this just Keeps on going forever.

and everything is the same but they pull up embarassing childhood memories whenever they start losing

[fivefeetfear]

Chp 7!

This Chapter goes out to @spinelxreader​ for showing me this song!

youtube.com/watch?v=Cdo0lfWoqws

I absolutely love it! I hope yall like it! Please watch the video so you can have a better understanding of the vibe for the story!

………………………………………….

“5, 6,7, 8!” (Y/N) shouts from the front of the class. The short girl is currently running through a rigorous routine with her class for an upcoming musical for the Summer Festival that is approaching in a few months. And she wants the show to go perfectly.

“More energy!” she shouts, her eyes watching her students from the mirror in front of her as she too danced.

“Alexi pick up your feet! Topaz I better see that leg go behind your head!” she yells, at the gem and human. She saw them both nod as they fell in proper coordination with the large group. Good. The song then ended and the class strikes their individual poses. (Y/N) whips around with a wide smile as she places her hands on her hips.

“Ok that was good everybody! Give yourself a round of applause.” The (C/G) gem praised. Amber and the other teachers clapped with their students for a job well done. Rehearsal are now over, the class sat on the floor or couches mingling with their friends. (Y/N) looks at the clock on the wall, she might have time to run through a new routine she was working on quickly, but before she could even move, someone stopped her in her tracks.

“You’re really an intense teacher.” (Y/N) chest tightens when she heard the familiar accent that made her very gem swoon. The curvy being turns around to see Spinel standing there wearing a friendly smile on her face. She wore a similar outfit from yesterday and this time her hair was in her signature pigtails. Oh goodness, she looks so adorable!

“El!” The (Y/G) calls out happily hopping into the pink girl’s arms, wrapping her arms around the slender gem neck. Spinel squeaks at the sudden weight not expecting the embrace.

“Hey, Doll I see ya in a good mood bout somethin.” Spinel mentions her positive attire while wrapping her long arms around the petite gem form.

“Well I was in a good mood before but you made it better!” (Y/N) coos batting her long lashes at the magenta gem. Spinel face flushed a bright pink stumbling over her words not sure how to respond to that. She wasn’t used to be flirted with.

“Ugh, get a room you two!” Amber shouts teasingly from across the studio, a chorus of lighthearted laughter follows her comment from the students watching the two. The taller gem hides her face in (Y/N) neck causing the small gem t to laugh sweetly into her ear. (Y/N) unwraps herself from Spinel, grabbing her hands and pulling her to a nearby love seat. She tucks her legs under herself at sat Spinel beside her.

“So did you bring the poem?” she asks curiously. Spinel nod her head as she digs in her hoodie pocket and pulls out the folded paper. (Y/N) took the sheet, quickly unfolding it, and starts to read the neat hand writing on the sheet. Spinel sat nervously as she twiddled with her thumbs. She didn’t know anything about writing a poem. So she had asked the Crystal Gems for help. They were really kind and patience when she was struggling to write out her feelings.

The quiet nearly suffocated Spinel as her leg bounces anxiously. She really hopes she doesn’t scare off (F/N) with all her issues. Once (F/N) was done, her (E/C) eyes move their gaze from the paper to worry magenta orbs. Oh stars! Spinel felt her chest squeeze in anticipation worry what she might think.

“This is really good Ellie. It’s so real, it’s raw and....thank you for trusting me to read something so personal.” (F/N) reaches her hand out placing it on top of hers giving it a reassuring squeeze. Spinel released the breath she was holding feeling relaxed. Oh thank the Diamonds she didn’t freak her out.

“R-really?” The slender gem stutters out, she subconsciously flips her palm up and claps (F/N) hand. Their fingers easily laces together bring both female comfort.

“Yes! It is powerful, symbolic and dark. It will make a perfect song!” (Y/N) says as she taps her chin wondering how to start the process.

“A song?” Spinel inquires as she watches (Y/N) summon a pen from her gem.

“Yeah! Told you that yesterday, writing the poem was step one. The next step is turning it into a song.” (Y/N) explains as she slides onto the floor on her knees to write on the coffee table.

“So what’s your favorite genre of music?” The short gem asks ready to write down some notes. Spinel joins the girl on the floor; she places her elbow on the table humming in thought. She favored a lot of genres, rock has been her go too as of late, but there was another that has her whole gem.

“Well, it ain’t considered a genre, but I favor Electroswing. Amethyst introduced me to it about a year ago.” Spinel answers.

“Electroswing? What’s that?” The (S/C) gem asks her head tilts to the side.  

“What!? Ya don’t know what Electroswing is?!”Spinel asks brows scrunched together in disbelief. (Y/N) shook her head slowly offering the spinel a bashful smile. Spinel hastily places her hands on the other girl's shoulders shaking her gently as she talks excitedly about her favorite thing.

“Swing is soooooo much fun! Ya do whateva ya want! Go wild, go fast or go slow! In swing there are no rules!” Spinel explains passionately with glittery eyes.

“You just explained the concept of every music genre ever, El.” The short girls say playfully rolling her eyes.

“Ya missin the point, swing is betta!” Spinel cracks back leaning in closer to (Y/N) face. Spinel could feel the fire ignite; the pink gem was ready to throw down when it came to talking about her favorite kind music. Swing dancing is one thing she knew she excels at without a doubt! She would bet her very gem on it. Swing always made her happy whenever she was down; it was her only coping mechanism on Homeworld. Nevertheless, it was hard to do swing alone; she couldn’t dance with the Diamonds and the other gems didn’t seem too into it. It saddens her that she couldn’t share the one thing she truly is passionate about with others. Spinel sighs softly as she leans back on her hands, she knew she could sweep (Y/N) off her feet with her abilities if given the chance.

Then an idea strikes her as she looks back over at the cute gem before her. Maybe this could be her chance.

“In fact.” She mutters with a mischief smirk as she stands up offering her hand to the small gem. (Y/N) took her hand and stood beside her with curious eyes.  

“C’mon, let me teach ya how to swing Doll.” Spinel says winking at the girl, her accent rolling off each word. The short gems knees almost caved right from under her as an army of swarming butterflies erupted in her stomach. Oh?  Where did this sudden burst of confidence come from? Just a second ago, she was a blushing mess! But now she was flirty? (Y/N) wasn’t complaining at all though, this is a side of Spinel she would love to explore more of. The tall gem led the two to the middle of the dance floor before explaining the art that is swing to the dance instructor.

“Ok, so swing has alotta dance styles. To name a few, there’s the Charleston, the Balbo and my personal favorite the Lindy Hop. We are going to learn how to Lindy Hop. So kick both your feet out like this…. Good, see simple.” Spinel coach’s as they stood side by side kicking their feet out slowly.

“Ok now go faster, and make sure to twist ya foot out. Amazing look at ya go.” Spinel complimented making the short gem blush, the two doing a few simple steps together.

“Now to add a lil flare, after ya kick, bring your knee-high while keeping the speed.  Ayyyy, there ya go teach!” A few of the students that decided to hang around watched their teacher get her very own dance lesson. Spinel taught (Y/N) a few more steps, they slowly pieced them together to create a short routine. (Y/N) was having too much fun receiving Spinel’s undivided attention the whole time. There were moments when she did a step wrong just to have Spinel’s hands on her shoulder or hips to correct the error.  After about an hour Spinel decided the (G/S) was ready.

“OK, now let’s try it with music!” the pink gem said as she the tugs collar of her sweater down to expose her perfectly heart-shaped gem. (Y/N) breath hitches in her throat when her eyes took noticed of defined collarbones and the top of her bra cups.

‘Get your shit together!’ She curses herself in her head. (E/C) hues watch Spinel summoned her phone from her gem and walks over to a student that sat beside a large radio.

“Play it when I say ready.” She instructs to the teen.

“Wait I’m not ready!” (Y/N) panics as Spinel approaches her. The pink gem rolls her eyes as she grabs the (G/C) gem hands into her own pulling their bodies close together.

“Oh stop that ya got this teach, just do it like I taught ya~.” She coos teasingly watching (Y/N) cheeks glow a bright (S/C). Satisfied with the reaction, Spinel rest one hand on (Y/G) hips, pressing their bodies closer together.

“Ready.” Spinel says over her shoulder to the student. The girl nods and presses the play button on the device to start the song.

one, two, three, take my hand and come with me

Because you look so fine

That I really wanna make you mine

I say you look so fine

That I really wanna make you mine

(Y/N) could feel her very core becoming putty in Spinel’s hands from the sudden buoyancy that radiant off the taller girl. (Y/N) never felt so nervous in her life and she was in a war! A devilish smirk spreads on Spinel’s lips as the pair sway in slow circles gazing at each other.

“See ya are doin fine, but the song is gonna pick up soon doll. Make sure you can keep up~.” Spinel whispers to her. Her words instantly brought out the competitive nature that burns within the short gem core. Her eyes sharpen teasingly at the suddenly arrogant Spinel. Two can play at this game.

“How about you worry about yourself, Ellie. Don’t forget I’m a teacher, I can dance circles around you all day.”  (Y/N) says smugly with a triumphant grin. Spinel ‘oohh’ playfully before she cranes down her neck lower, her hand giving the curvy gems hip a rough squeeze. An insatiable jolt shots right up her spine as electricity tickles the inside of her gem. Fuck.  

“If ya make that all day to all night, then I would love to schedule a private lesson~.” (Y/N) nearly lost her footing at Spinel words. Oh shit, that was smooth as fuck, seriously where is all this confidence coming from? Before (Y/N) could fully compose herself, she was twirled around as the song's tempo sped up as Spinel promised. Spinel danced with ease, knowing this song like the back of her hand having had heard it a million times. Finally getting a grip; (Y/N) followed Spinel’s lead, remembering the steps she had just learned.

Well I could see

You home with me

But you were with another man, yeah!

I know we

Ain't got much to say

Before I let you get away, yeah!

I said, are you gonna be my girl?

Spinel swung out the short gem out; letting her arm stretching a few feet before yanking the (Y/N) back to her. The (E/C) eyed gem coiled into the elongated limp back into Spinel’s embrace. With the use of her arm, the pink gem then whips the short girl like a top making her twirl something fierce. She looks like a small tornado! This made the slender gem laugh as she magically grasped (Y/N) hands from her cyclone state making her come to a complete stop. The dizzy (G/S) laughs as her head lolls from the rush.

“You ok darling?” Spinel asks the girl in her arms they spun in a slow circle.

“That wasn’t part of the lesson.” She says softly composing herself enough to fall into step with the pink gem. Spinel chuckles softly as she at the short girl with sharp eyes.

“Told ya to keep up.” She resorted humorously.  (Y/N) snaps herself out of her dizzy daze and fell back into step.

Big black boots

Long blonde hair

She's so sweet

With her get back stare

Well I could see

You home with me

But you were with another man, yeah!

I know we

Ain't got much to say

Before I let you get away, yeah!

I said, are you gonna be my girl?

Spinel soon broke off from the partner routine to do her own thing, she stretched and twisted her body in a toony fashion. Her body fluctuating in ways one can only dream. The pink gem arms swung in every direction as her feet shuffles quickly. (Y/N) found herself standing still since she couldn’t even predict her moves. All she could do was watch in amazement as Spinel literally danced circles around her with her bright smile. I guess she had to admit defeat, Spinel out danced her and she wasn’t even upset about it. Seeing the The short gem loved the way her magenta eyes shine as she dances her heart out. (F/N) really could tell she was in the zone and not even showing off, the love of ones passion is so powerful it really can take you away.

The (H/C) gem watch as Spinel slides on her knees from across the class, stopping in front of her. Spinel easily sprung back onto her feet, her larger hand grabs (Y/N) left hand and whips her around to the tempo of the trumpet.

“C’mon suga, show me what ya got~.” She says spinning the girl out from across the floor. (Y/N) stood off to the side of the floor thinking what she could pull off successfully. Spinel did say she could do whatever she wanted. (F/N) takes a running start she easily performed various styles of layout flips across the floor. She then plants herself back onto the ground and rushes over to Spinel. The pink gem bends her knees to get low as (Y/N) flashes into her awaiting arms. Spinel smirks as she whirls around before tossing (F/N) high up in the air. (F/N) giggles loudly as she was launched upwards, she strike a pose when she reach her high point. As (F/N )began to descended back down, Spinel coils her arms securely around her waist and thigh to dip the (S/C) gem in a fish pose. The class gasped in amazement and fear as they saw (F/N) face was merely inches away from the floor. If Spinel would had miscalculated the time, the (G/S) would had smash her face against the hardwood floor.

The duo continue to freestyle . Spinel places the short girl right back up in front of her. (Y/N) presses her ass against Spinel’s front, grinding in a slow manner making the pink gem nearly drop to her knees. The feeling of (Y/N) soft ass rubbing up against her sex sent sparks of pleasure through the pink gem. The sensation nearly left her breathless. Spinel reaches down to grab her hips to keep the female in place; craving more of the new feeling but (Y/N) slips from her grasp. The short gem easily did a straddle split and slides between Spinel’s legs to get behind her. The taller gem whips around with heavy eyes as she stretches her arms out and yanks the (F/N) back into her.

“Tease~.” She purrs earning a giggle from the (Y/G).

“Keep up.” She quips back with a wink.

Oh yeah, oh yeah, c'mon!

I could see

You home with me

But you were with another man, yeah!

Sadly, the song was ending and Spinel wished they could do this a while longer. This is the most fun she ever had in a long while. But she is proud of herself for make it this far without collapsing from over stimulation, and she was determined to end strong too. The pink gem grabs onto (Y/N) hands and spins her a few times before swinging the girl down into a dip. Gathering all the confidence she had left, Spinel opens her mouth to sing the last few lines.

“I know we, ain't got much to say, before I let you get away, yeah!” The short gem’s chest tightens when she heard a brilliant voice ringing in her ears. Her gazes instantly morphing into shock to astonishment as Spinel sang the lyrics effortlessly. Holy fuck, she didn’t know she could sing like this!

The slender gem smirks at the girl’s starry-eyed expression; she slowly brought her back up to her feet, pressing their physiques close together. The pink gem stares down at her with hooded eyes as she uses her fingers to tilt the awestruck gem chin up. (Y/N) breath hitched in her throat at the action, her mind went blank. She couldn’t think and she couldn’t move. Her mind has finally reached its limit of surprises. From the events of yesterday, mixed in with dancing and singing became too much for her bare. All she could feel was the butterflies coming back with a vengeance.

“Uh, be my girl, be my girl, are you gonna be my girl? Yeah.” The hairs on the back (Y/N) stood on end as Spinel riffs out the high notes smoothly. Chills travel through her form, as she stood unmoving locked into place. Spinel smiles at the frozen female in her arms loving the fact she was able to leave her speechless for once.  Spinel could feel her ego swell ten times it sizes, she very proud of her work. Then her cocky smile slips from her face when she notices a soft (F/C) glow around the short gems silhouette. Spinel raises an eyebrow as she watches her (H/C) hair slowly levitate in the air. The (C/G) girls was deeply enchanted by Spinel that her powers activated on their own, slowly lifting her off the ground. Spinel watched as the (F/N) slowly floats up towards the ceiling, clearly still in a trance. Well damn, she knew she was good but not that good. Spinel giggles cutely pleased to have this effect on her. She stretches her arms up tugging the curvy girl back down by her hands with a fond smile plastered on her lips.  

“Ya doin ok darlin?” The taller gem askes when she placed the short girl back down. The roars of applause snapped (Y/N) out of her daze. Oh stars, did she really just blacked out? (Y/N) clasped her hands on her cheeks and buried her face back into Spinel’s chest whining childishly in embarrassment. The pink gem erupts into a belly laughter while she snakes her arms around (Y/N) a few times pulling her close.

“It’s not funny!” the short gem cries out making Spinel laugh harder.

“It’s a lil funny.”

……………………………………………………………………………………………….

Omg this was so much fun to write !! I hope you guys enjoyed the fluffffffff!!!!

I hope yall liked it! I will be taking a break but I will be very much active on here!

[postmodern-blues]

first listen to rhys and ianto’s excellent barbecue: a saga

I’m just gonna put all my thoughts in order while I listen to this audio and do my homework. I’ll tag it for spoilers, but I’ll also put everything below the cut in case you haven’t listened to it yet <3 um also i do a lot of swearing be warned...

last warning, yall, lots of spoilers and quotes ahead:

Rhys’s friends call him RHYSIE and I Am So Soft For This.

“I’m making my Special Sauce” god if Jack were here....

I love how Torchwood writers can’t even find a way to write RHYS in a straight way. He’s so cute and AHSDHGHFDAS I LOVE THIS SO FAR

the meat jokes.... already.... let’s hope serentiy Ianto does not resurface

IANTO! my god I have missed my boy. HE IS BACK

Oh my god... oh my fuck.... he’s so CUTE i might need to take a breather.... dude....

Gwen looking out for Ianto, inviting him to Rhys’s stuff. DID SOMEONE SAY FOUND FAMILY HMMMM

“lads, lads, lads” I WENT FERAL WHEN I HEARD THIS IN THE TRAILER

“Jack’s sorry he couldn’t come” hhhhhhhh one sausage comes off the barbecue and he’d be like “this is quite homoerotic” HAIJFODHS

Rhys come on,,,, baby,,,,, do not be homophobic about this

I get the feeling I might be going too crazy about this,,, WE’RE ONLY FIVE MINUTES IN

godDAMNIT THIS IS THE SHIT I’VE BEEN CRAVING EVER SINCE GHOST TRAIN afdsohfs

Ianto brought Chardonnay....

“Except Banana boat, he’s a bit thick” AGFDKHDGS R H Y S

oh shit alien things are happening

“yes, RHYS, I know how to discuss my TOP SECRET work at a social event” he’s fucking ICONIC

“you have an inability to call each other by your proper names” my sister is just like this tho... she calls all her friends by anime character names.. little bit better than ‘sticky jeff’ but not much

Ianto being oblivious to Rhys’s gender role shit is just,,,, I STAN HIM

If Ianto and Rhys do not take a ride in the pink car by the end of this audio I’m suing

jkjk but that would be so great wouldn’t it

godDAMNIT i love this audio

"we.... don’t” yet again, it is the 21st century, and torchwood is sooo not ready

“It’s the BOYS’ barbecue” rhys and his friends seem like they have a very cute queerplatonic relationship. wonder if they wear socks when they’re doing “barbecues”

who the fuck is steven.... whAT IS GOING ON

“I don’t know him THAT well, but there’s no way he would call me love” u sure abt that rhysie

“if u run headfirst into an invisible wall, at least let me FILM it on my phone” these two i stfg

this ‘time bubble’ concept has SO MANY FIC POSSIBILITIES why is big finish spoiling us-

jack and gwen going for pizza instead of being at work AHHDOFDGSHK 

oh my GOD THE CALLBACK TO DISSECTED!!!!! this is like when gareth called back to The Last Beacon in Dinner and a Show AHHHH

I am reminded about martha and gwen,,, i am happy,,, the PARALLELS

these two arguing dude the TENSION.. the SUBTEXT

“god help you if you ever hear about pink wine” SFIHOJADHGF 

i swear half my commentary here is me quoting something funny and then keyboard smashing

Ianto is fucking ANNIHILATING Rhys here and by extension gender roles. Goddamnit THIS is the conversation we needed. I love him so much can you tell

“you LOVE each other” I’ve only had this audio for about half an hour but if anything fucking happens to it, i’ll kill everyone in the room and then myself

i don’t think you understand how goddamn adorable rhys is about his friends

“thank fuck none of them are here right now” mate my man badger calls you RHYSIE i don’t think it would affect them

I am so thankful Jack isn’t here because oh my g o d this would be an hour long block of innuendos. this whole audio is just exposing the very prominent homoerotic tendencies of straight men

sometimes, and by that i mean all the time, i wonder if my family hears me listening to big finish and wonders if i’m actually just watching porn. and honestly I think it would be a whole lot less embarrassing if i just told them i was watching porn instead of “yeah it’s this scifi thing these characters are trying to make a hole in an invisible time force field thing. are they gay? no, well, i mean, yes, but not like that! welllll, a little bit like that, but it’s NOT PORN”

“what the hell was that rhys? You Absolute Idiot.” AHHH THESE TWO

“let’s stuff it full of sausages” 

GWEN AND IANTO TELLING EACH OTHER STORIES ABOUT THEIR IDIOT HUSBANDS IS MY LIFEBLOOD FUCKKKKKK

“back pocket” THIS IS SENDING ME BACK TO MY SHERLOCK FANDOM DAYS (fucking remember john getting sherlock’s phone out of his coat that he was wearing? that’s what this is)

Rhys pretending to be Steven (Stephen?) is,,,,, oh my god,,, this is too fucking intense

god i feel so bad for rhys,,, seriously

ohmygodddddd

this took a serious turn I was not prepared for

also gwen wanting rhys to talk to ianto is,,, ughhhh i ship gwen/rhys sooo hard

rhys- baby- oh my godohmygodohmygod

im like,,, IM CRYING BRO THIS IS

“I DO love them” hhhhhh

the special sauce thing is sending me im sorry

“can we rescue the beer?” RHYS

‘Ianto you beautiful man, you did it!” THEY!!! THEY!!!!!!

i wanna make it clear that i don’t ship rhys and ianto but i think they are so cute as friends

guys im in tears right now

the way rhys goes from not wanting ianto here to not wanting him to leave,,, um its a simple arc but i’d also do anything for it

RHYS AND GWEN RHYS AND GWEN RHYS AND GWEN ANDHDHSGHFAOSDLSDLHD

“OH HE’S ADORABLE WHATS HE CALLED?” me when i first saw Ianto Jones onscreen

“he’s a colleague of the missus,,,,,, and a friend” why don’t you just shoot me in the head hm

rhysie,,, baby,,, holy shit you need to go to therapy,,, just like,,, have a chat with janet the weevil and see how you feel after

funny how rhys fucking williams is handling loss so much better than ANY of torchwood. like jack got PREGNANT after losing owen+tosh. Ianto started having sex with his immortal boss after losing his girlfriend. healthy coping mechanisms? who is she?

they let rhys say fuck a lot in this audio and that is Very Sexy of Them

“bunny has run away with my tie” h e s s o f u c k i n g p r e c i o u s

“lads lads lads” AHHHHHHHHH

this audio. is. so good. so cute. so sad. BIG FINISH YOU DID IT AGAIN YOU SEXY BASTARDS YOU!!!!

[devondraws]

Megastar shippers are mad again :o!! big shocker

TW ed // abu$e // Megastar clearly // a$sault  // $elf H@rm

So it’s been made clear to me I was ‘exposed’ on Twitter for hating Megastar here's the main thing. none of yall expose me, I'm open about hating this toxic abusive ship, I don’t hide it and I never once have. You don’t need to censor my name in fact, I prefer you don't. I never said or would ever to say to a victim, I have no regard or sympathy for what they went through especially not as one myself through multiple abusers. What I DONT have sympathy for is disregarding other victims for your arguably coping strategy. I would take away anyone's abuse if I could, but when you choose to ‘cope’ by promoting, fet!shizing, and romanticizing the awful terrible experience that is abuse, I will tell you to your face the damage you do to others. 

I’ll start with the big argument, it’s a coping mechanism, but coping doesn’t mean good and it is VERY dangerous to think so. One of the many I coped with the abuse from my longest abuser was starving myself and not taking my medication. It made me feel strong, and feel like I was in total control, but that did not make it good. Especially being chronically ill, I was quite literally abusing MYSELF. When it comes to a much less physical way, I coped by making fun of others when I was around 13-15 especially ‘SJWs’ I made fun of kids that are autistic (knowing I was myself but not wanting to admit to that mentally) I made fun of people really who just weren’t like me, furries, band kids, scene kids. It was a lot of self-hatred and it did in a way heal me and do what I wanted it to do a coping strategy but it wasn’t okay, it wasn’t good, and importantly it was intensely unhealthy and worsed what I went through in the long run. Heres where Megastar shippers may be shocked I did megastar. Not long, but I did, around the age of 11-12. I idolized it, and I listened to the fandom really, I said it made me feel good and it made me happy hell I even said I wanted a ‘Megatron’ in my life. Boy did I get one. and because of the ship at that. I met a much older girl and we would DM on Insta, she sent things I shouldn’t have seen and audios I shouldn’t have heard. She said outright I was her ‘Starscream’ and that Megatron did ‘he had to’ to keep Starscream as his own and that he did what he did out of pure love and I ate it up. If being abused love I wanted to be abused, I just wanted to belong. But looking back the fandom's idea and admiration for megastar was very bad on my 11-year-old mind. KEEP IN MIND the show is not for adult audiences, I was a targeted consumer and I listened and learned from the adults, from the fandom, as any child does. So when I saw both the fet!ishzation of MLM and of abuse. I learned that to be normal. And from that, I learned that to be how I should COPE when I’m sad, I should be just like them because everyone says they are happy. I'm not the only, though other people's stories aren't my to tell, I can say they mention a$sault, physical abuse, mental, etc. I shouldn’t have to explain to mostly 15-25-year-olds, why that's not true and why just because you cope with something doesn’t make it healthy.

A second big ‘argument’ I see is, ‘fiction doesn’t affect reality’ ‘it’s fictional’ ‘its a cartoon’. I don’t understand this ‘debate’ because we have seen SO. MANY. TIMES. OF. FICTION. AFFECTING. (guess what) R E A L I T Y. Take, for example, finding Nemo and both the mass flushing of pet fish and also the mass abuse of Clownfish because every child wanted a ‘Nemo’. We see this again when we look into dinosaurs actually! In mainstream media the idea of dinosaurs being scaly, reptile-like, etc. that's not true and we’ve known it's not true! Dinos are ‘speculated’ to be feathered and colorful hence why they came to be BIRDS. But that idea, because we saw in movies, stuck. And most people who don’t research (and that's most people) only saw the fictional version, that version is what stands out in their minds, to them that is a dinosaur. After 101 Dalmatians so many, I mean SO MANY, kids wanted a Dalmatian. They are amazing dogs but the thing is they need a little more training, well parents didn’t want a real dog they wanted a movie dog, a cartoon dog, and so they got puppies. When those puppies grew and became ornery and no effort was put in place to train them, they were given away in mass. We KNOW fiction affects reality, we know human brains can’t process some fictional characters (especially in anime) as cartoons. We cry over fiction, we laugh over it, we learn from it, we put morals in it for kids, I don’t get why some people still argue it doesn’t happen and I’m not going to argue with ignorance. 

Essentially here's the points. You CAN cope with Megastar, but you shouldn’t, it provides no actual help it can actually soften you to abusers, it warps the idea of abuse, it romanticizes it, (a big part of it is YOAI which is fet!shizaton of MLM) and it NORMALIZES it by being commonly consumed and a large part of the Transformers, and TFP’s specifically, fandom. Fiction DOES affect reality what you do online, say online, show online, especially to minors, is heavily altering to a mindset and to people in correlation with what's being shown. You can hate me all you want, censor my name all you want, but no one is arguing besides ‘I like it and I said so’ you can say so, I can’t silence you and I wouldn’t, but when you neglect and turn down what is blatant problems and obvious issues in front of you? That is no problem of mine :)

You ship abuse and if you are gonna keep doing it, at least own up <3

(also you guys can ship abuse without it affecting reality but I can’t make a joke hrm hmm)

edit: for context for the last part I made a joke about STARSCREAM killing megastar shippers. I said killing yes but how is that death wish did yall really think i was like. bout to summon the guy I’m confused by you guys make it make sense.

Edit 2: in the future i WILL clarify jokes better ill put that slash thing i think its /j. To me and my friends it was and still is obvious but i understand the concern. Ive gotten multiple ACTUAL threats of being doxed, assulted, etc. so clarifying wasnt a need in my head and ill be better at doing so next time i totally get how to some people specially those with truama it could have been seen as scary and im sorry i didnt clarfiy as i should!

[gazeboarcade]

Where, besides Tumblr, can people find you doing fannish things? (Obviously only mention sites and usernames you actually want to be found at. Don’t expose your secret identities on my account.)

What other names have you gone by on these platforms, including Tumblr, if any?

When did you join the IT fandom? And what got you into fandom, to begin with?

What are your favorite ships, or characters, if any, and why? What do they mean to you?

In what ways do you participate in fandom? (ex. Posting memes, reblogging/commenting on content, writing fanfic, making fanart, creating fanmixes, etc.)

Do you have any in-fandom inspirations? Other members of the community that drive you? (And if you have the time/energy, in what ways do they inspire you?)

Name and link some of your favorite works, please!

Do you have any works of your own that you feel particularly proud of, or wish more people would’ve consumed? Please provide links if possible.

Have you ever participated in a fannish event (ie. IT Week, a fic Big Bang) or applied to be a part of a fanzine? If so, which ones, and can you please link them?

Without any form of bashing or lashing out, what is something you feel this fandom is missing?

GOSH this is a lot of questions, lemme give it my best shot.

1.) I sometimes still post art on my art instagram, but I prefer not to cross the beams of that and my tumblr so much. If someone rlly wants the handle tho, feel free to ask. 

2.) If this means like...nicknames, too many to count. One of my first URLs was something like “pensword,” which was a reference to Percy Jackson!

3.) I was KINDA in it in 2017 when the first movie came out, but it didn’t hold my attention too much. In September 2020, I really got into IT, tho! I got into it because I realized it was coming up on a year since I saw the second one in theaters (during a wind advisory night in the city I go to college, on Halloween). For a couple of silly reasons (my ex belittling IT a little and me being weirdly internalized homophobic abt it) I was scared to enjoy it publicly haha

4.) My favorite ship in the fandom, ofc, is Reddie! I am kinda basic so I also really think Ben and Bev are sweet. I also really liked Patty and Stan together in the book... they were so achingly sweet together that the bath chapter made me cry for a HOT MINUTE.

Richie is my all time favorite character for reasons I could probably write like 50 pages on! Some of those reasons are like super-duper personal lol so I pull punches on just dumping them on my blog haha! I just really really related to him for a lot of reasons (the humor coping mechanism and the werewolf thingy, to name a couple) so it was only natural I latched onto that boy and went full send kinnie moment!

Eddie is my second favorite bc I love him and wanted the best for him (I don’t want to start disc horse on tumblr, but my gf and I have schemed abt who should have kicked it at the end and it ain’t him). I also have a soft spot for kid Ben in the book, bc I really thought he was a sweetheart (I mean, cmon, walking around whispering Bev’s name? Adorable! Hiding away in libraries? Relatable!)

5.) I’ve done a bunch of stuff! This blog has a ton of IT content. I have made a bunch of fan art (most of which hasn’t been posted sdjbvkdsjbvk). I have written a couple fanfics (a finished oneshot and one unfinished longer one that will...probably stay that way). I have a reddie playlist on spotify, too.

6.) There’s been a few people who’ve done some IT stuff I’ve really liked! Uhh @stitchyarts  wrote some fics and has done some beautiful art to go with it that I really liked!! @skelesocks did some HELLA charming art, tho is now mostly Queen blog. No shade there, I have a Queen blog, too, lol. Ask for the URL if you want it. Both of them focused on the miniseries tho.

There’s a couple artists who have done Reddie stuff I have really liked, too, which is super inspiring. here’s a few of those: @trashcanprince @mxgicdave @meowsteryyy ..... tbh fave IT blog of all time tho has to be my gf, em, @dr-kaspbrakmd , bc she got me full swing obsessing and also it was a big bonding thing for us early into the relationship *pauses for crowd to say AWWWWW*

7.) Assuming this means fanfics, like I said, a lot of Stitchy’s works, especially Tinted Windows and TV Guides (which now i rlly want to re-read lol). I kinda have a hard time with fanfic reading bc im picky and sometimes it’s better to daydream my own stories. The other Reddie fics I’ve liked will make yall get the shepherd’s hook and yoink me off stage for public indecency for sure so I’m gonna leave that to ur imagination <3

8.) I feel positively heinous and pick-me trying to get ppl to read my old reddie fics that I wrote during the crushing weight of crippling lonliness so no. they r also not rlly that good so you’re welcome <3

9.) No actually! I have thought about it. I have also schemed the idea of starting my own reddie zine and being super choosey about who gets in but that’s just me wanting to curate content I like lollll.

10.) uhhh decorum, understanding of complex relationships/emotional situations, and the common sense not to fetishize gay men <3 that sounds rlly snotty but there’s some activity tm in this fandom that yucks me out big time. Also, I wish more ppl would have seen the miniseries/read the book but that’s just me being choosy.

Anyways, I’ve been running my mouth for WAY too long but I hope this answers the questions you had good enough!! Thanks for asking!!

[eitelle]

Hi!! Congrats on 60 followers btw! 💗

I am a female and I’d like to matched up with a guy from Haikyuu. I am ENFJ, (but sometimes enfp). I’m outgoing and generally nice to everyone, but I have a very sassy, goofy personality. Naturally flirty and very affectionate, and my love language is physical touch. I have my moments when I get shy and anxious, especially around someone I really have a crush on. Yet at the same time I’m the person always trying to hug and cuddle my friends even after roasting them. My favorite colors are blue, red, purple and pink. I love some teasing. I’m passionate about acting and singing. I love to listen to all kinds of music. I have long curly blackish hair and I’m 5’2. I’m a Gemini Sun, Cancer Rising and Gemini Moon. I am a caring and adaptable person, and like to make people happy I always finding a way to slip a stupid joke in🙄( joking is my coping mechanism) . My favorite food is tacos. African-American, and I like someone that I can relate to. I don’t have a specific type, but I do like someone with goals and passion. I like someone I can laugh with and also have real conversations with. I’m so into the romantic lovey-dovey stuff, yet sometimes I act like a little boy💀. I can be loud asf, even just when normally talking cause I usually have a lot of energy.

As far as style goes, it varies from 12 year old boy with some joggers and a t-shirt wayyyy too big for me , to like a 90s baddie with some hoops on, to girly with skirts, sweaters and some knee high socks. As far as accomplishments go, I’ve won state in theater and continue to pursue acting. It’s something I’m very passionate about. Some flaws of mine are overthinking and my anxiety. Like I’ll overthink an entire situation before I really know what happened and assume that someone like hates me. Or I’ll assume I’m talking to much and that’s it’s annoying so I just kinda.. shut down. My anxiety can get kinda bad, i get all shaky and I care a lot about what people think of me (although I try to deny it). So I’ll need someone who can bring me back to earth every now and then. But it’s getting better with time and I’m trying to stress myself out less. When I’m out I’ve got such a big personality and I’m making dumb jokes and dancing, but when I get home I’m just chilling and watching anime. (Although I will dance and make jokes if I feel like it). And I’m a night owl!

Sorry if this was too much!! I really appreciate what you are doing 💗.

OH MY GOD IM AN INFJ THAGS SO COOL!! MY ONLINE PERSONALITY IS LOWK ENFJ THO SO I THINK THATS SO SWAG SHSHSHS (if u recall me saying otherwise shhhhh thats when i trusted 16personalities) ALSO STATE IN ACTING??? UR SO COOL WTF?? ANYWAYS

ok i was actually just wanting to do a matchup w this character n it just so happens u seem to literally fit what id say is his ideal type so i have matched you with: semi eita

GOSH I LOVE HIM OK HCS: (also im so sorry for doing these so late shshs 😖)

forst of all hes def helping w ur lines

like hes such a good person to help prep u

hes also like lowk very lowkey shdhd and honest/blunt so if u ever get an anxiety attack i think hed tell u how it is like straight up n that ur overreacting but in the way that snaps u back to reality

n hes like ur anchor shdhd

i think thats so cute

and sometimes he gets stage fright so i feel like your presence would just help comfort him

OOH ALSO YALL WOULD PROB RELEASE SO GS TOGETHER

N HED LOVE SINGING W U 😫‼️

i feel like hed call u angel, his muse, or his bitch. no in between.

i also feel like he loves how hes so pale and his hair is gray and hes tall n ur lowk short n ur skin is darker and ur hair is like complete opposites and he loves that

like the opposites but fits so well together thing

yall def listen to ricky montgomery together idec.

and taylor swift.

ooh i know for a fact that mans had a hamilton phase but thats why hes so hot tbh

yall also make like photo/mood boards of yall or playlists lol i feel so lonely rn help-

if one of ur anxiety attacks comes in public u know this man is gonna pull the “im famous u want a photo?” to drag attention away from u shdh

oh u def call him suga by “accident” to make him mad HAHAHSJSH

prob the clubbing people but i could see him n u watching anime together and u accidentally hum the ops while harmonizing by accident sometimes shahsgdj

GOSH OK THAT WAS LONG SORRY OK ANYWAYS NOW ITS TIME FOR A ONE SHOT!! (also if u ever need to talk ab something my dms r always open!!)

IS THAT THE TOUNGE N LIKE TEETH THING BUT IN ANIME??/7;6&3);&;7: I JEVER NOTICED THIS WHAT THE FUCK

on a normal friday night, a (your age) person would normally be out with friends, or maybe even going clubbing. but not you, no you and your boyfriend were sitting on the couch, howl's moving castle on your tv and your head on his chest.

it was a chill day to say the least, you and him both having a full day off and spending it like this the two of you too exhausted from the weeks events already. you had random music playing in the background. by random i mean random it went from ed sheeran to lil uzivert all the way to BTS; needless to say it was kinda a mess. but that was how you liked it.

all of a sudden ‘The Schuyler Sisters’ from the original broadway cast of hamilton: the musical started blasting interrupting the beautiful silence w background noise.

you turn to look at your boyfriend, your chests now pressed against each other to look at him staring just past you at his phone, a light pink blush tinting his ears.

“a hamilton kid i see..” you tease playfully noticing how he flushed even deeper.

“o-oi shut up, my- my mom set it for me ok?” he tries to say, his excuses unheard as you burst into laughter tired of holding it in.

“we- well at least pick it up,” you say between laughs.

“fine. hello?” he says as he answers the call. “oh- but today, no i understand. of course. ok ill be right there.”

as he shifts you look at him all of a sudden concerned, you didn’t want your boyfriend overworking himself afterall.

“darling is everything ok?” you ask afraid of the answer. then you notice how hes not meeting your eyes and how hes tapping his knee with his pointer finger. his little tell he was trying to hold in laughs. “oh haha very funny semi now drop the act can we please just go back?” you try to reason.

“oh but getting u annoyed like this is so cute >w<“ he laughs seeing you grumble about how he was ‘so annoying’ as you turn to ignore him.

“oh shut up.”

“make me :p”

“maybe i will,” you say before stuffing a pillow in his mouth and leaning your head against it. “now enjoy the movie.” </3

HES SO PRETTY OML 🤩🤤

ohmygod now its time for my last texts for this event ahhh

OK I HOPE U ENJOYED SORRY THIS WAS SO LATE SHDGSH

[splendidshinobi]

FULLMETAL ALCHEMIST 2003 LIVE REACT: EPISODES 6-10

back at it again with the white vans

episode 6: the alchemy exam

alrighty then

um mustang calling edward “ed” is EXTREMELY offputting

ohhhhhhh noooooo not shou tucker

FUCK

im wholly unprepared

them all being in central instead of east is low key jarring like my brain isnt computing it

alexander’s intro is basically the same 

nina bbyyyyy girl u deserved so much better

ed is such a fucking nerd...chemistry club modern au confirmed

god the more tucker talks the more i wanna beat his face in

al pretending to eat by tossing a potato in his armor i-

aww theyre playing in the snow theyre so pure

wonder how long thatll last

“bigger brother” and “little big brother” and ed doesnt even get mad

ed’s birthday party????????

A MELON? ED YOURE SO RUDE

so 03 had ed’s bday instead of elicia’s...CAUSE THEY GOT ELICIA IN THE WOMB

“it’s here!” “the tea?” “the baby!” hughes is a fuck head

ok so now they’re having elicia replace rush valley baby arc

this was winry’s time to shine in fmab i miss her 

if winry isnt here who is gonna birth this baby

oh my god they just realized ed can use alchemy without a circle

no wonder he’s been using circles this whole time

SO ELICIA JUST POPPED OUT????? WHAT

STUFF ALEXANDER IN THE ARMOR AND PRETEND YOURE A TALKING DOG???

“i dont think thats very funny” NO ALPHONSE IT IS NOT

THEY KNEW EXACTLY WHAT THEY WERE DOING WITH THAT ONE I SWEAR TO GOD IN THIS ESSAY I WILL

damn bradley what up homie

im so thrown off by the way theyre doing the exam omg

seriously what the hell is fuhrer bradley’s purpose right now is he even the fuhrer in this i feel like they wouldve mentioned it

oh lord ed is about to impress everyone with his clappy hands

ok so next episode is nina FUCK

episode 7: night of the chimera’s cry

havoc babeeee

im gonna marry him my himbo king

also can RIZA DO SOMETHING PLZ

“huhhhhhhhh nina” ew tucker that was weirdly gross

wonder why

cant do it cant do it

do we think jean kirstein was modeled after jean havoc slightly looks wise

was that purposeful 

ill have to google 

serial killer who only targets women?  it cant be scar...scar drinks respect women juice

barry or slicer bros maybe? um ok

why did we start with liore if they were just gonna hop right back into the past for a huge chunk of episodes idk

assessment day??? oh noodles

AL WHY DID YOU TELL TUCKER TO MAKE ANOTHER TALKING CHIMERA ALPHONSE NO

THE NOISE I EMITTED IM GONNA TAKE A LAP

im gonna FUCKING SCREAM

ed r u writing to winry??? that’s a bit out of character for u good sir

no tucker put that baby down

im gonna fucking SCREAM

aww he burned nina’s picture thats not sus at all

SHESKA!!!!!

wait does the ironblood alchemist know what tucker did to his wife? thats kinda the vibe im getting

SCARRRRRRRR

looking like a pirate too damn

his voice sounds different is that j michael tatum 

apparently not it was dameon clarke in 03 ya learn something new everyday 

ew elicia has a lot of hair for a FUCKING NEWBORN

ed really is such a cynic very suspicious of everyone as he should be really

basque grand knowS SOMETHING

oh jesus oh fuck oh god please do not TOUCH THAT BABY

ed and al snuck back in to the house well u know what its for the best

OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

im gonna cry again please god no

FUCKING DIE SHIT HOLE

she’s hurting? oh my god

my sweet angel

ew his eyes!!!!!!! 

tucker is such a fucking failure...like look at the chimera squad and greed’s theatre troupe being the way they are. ugh it really hits how fucking unfair it is 

ed was really about to split them? boy you know better

where is nina going...im hurting

ed really tried to save her in this one

SCAR KILLS NINA IN THE STREETS???????? SIR

thats different

oh snap 

oh FUCK

SCAR WHY DID YOU LEAVE HER BODY LIKE THAT

THE WAY SHE WAS ARRANGED ON THE WALL THAT WAS FUCKED UP

AND THEY FOUND HER LIKE THAT???? AT LEAST IN BROTHERHOOD THEY DIDNT HVE TO SEE HER CORPSE ARE YOU SHITTING ME?

that was fucked.

episode 8: the philosopher’s stone

can yall get ed and al away from nina’s fucking MURAL 

get out of the car mustang

finally jesus christ

roy mustang talking about healthy coping mechanisms dont make me laugh but alright baby boy go off i guess?

im curious about who this goddamn serial killer is though lets turn to that plot thread

r u kidding me

mustang is making ed and al take over tucker’s research?? thats actually wildly messed up

oh tucker was straight executed that’s a choice i guess

tucker and the philosopher’s stone sounds inaccurate but ok

ed please stop being mean to your brother

03 mustang has got me reaching for a fucking baseball bat on GOD

scar and edward having this conversation right now i literally cannot

WINRY yes bitch

BRADLEY WHAT IN TARNATION

JESUS LORRRRRRDDDDDDDDDDDD

alphonse shut your mouthhhhhhhhhhh

im so confused what is bradley up to

“alchemists are not cold blooded murderers?”

i mean

kimblee would beg to differ for one

whos this creepy lady 

her voice sounds familiar

barry’s food shop?

the killer is barry ok got it

IS BARRY DISGUISED AS A WOMAN

I KNEW THAT WAS JERRY JEWELL’S VOICE

WELL I KNEW IT SOUNDED FAMILIAR AT LEAST

WINRY GET OUT OF THE FUCKING TRUCk

has PINAKO TAUGHT YOU NOTHING

ok so i VASTLY prefer suit of armor original manga canon barry

this is such an odd plot what in fuck

um OW the meat cleaver

im so confused this fucking plotline

oh hey alphonse nice of you to show up!

is barry still gonna become a suit of armor later on

it makes NO SENSE to introduce him otherwise 

everytime i see 03 mustang i wanna beat his ass HONESTLY

literally i will shove my foot up his ass

fullmetal here we go

ed thinks he’s so punk rock 

oh great scar’s seen the watch

episode 9: be thou for the people

ed you simp buying winry all this stuff my edwin heart is ascending

SIMP SIMP SIMP

“mr. elric”?? you mean MAJOR ELRIC

to be fair though fuck the military

YOUSWELL??? oh LORD

im gonna need to read a full chronology of this show

 alphonse continues to be a precious angel 

where’s my boy yoki!!!!!

edward you idiot don’t go flaunting your money

woof woof ed

al looks so offended by ed saying they just met

whereas in brotherhood didnt he totally throw ed under the bus??? 

a choice to be sure

ah there he is hello yoki

who’s the chick

shes a lesbian

yoki makes me miss my baby girl mei chang

mei where r u

WAS THIS MILITARY DUDE REALLY ABOUT TO CUT DOWN A CHILD??? oh my god

hawkeye getting a promotion yes bby girl

jesus theyre transferring them to east now OKKKKKAY thats not how it happened it the book but ill take it....just doing it the opposite way i guess

who is lyra who is she

cute some military bribery 

umm lyra what the fuck did you do

lyra is a homunculus im callin it now

they definitely invented/changed up some homunculi in fact im certain they did and shes one of em. gotta be

i feel like 03 wrote ed as much more insensitive towards others than he really is...just a vibe im getting

i know he was faking for the townspeople’s sake but i still get this vibe from other instances 

i mean i cant say its not “canon” because its 03 canon

anyways what a show off

i cant believe theyre going to east...fuery and breda better be there

ok finally some answers on their ages....ed got his license at 12 like normal and nina and youswell were when he was 12...liore was 15, 

if they didnt flash the ages on the screen id be lost honestly

at least we’re back up to “present day”

episode 10: the phantom thief

ed saying he doesnt wanna see mustang

same

03 mustang is activating my fight or flight and im choosing fight

ed cheating at cards totally checks out

um who the fuck is this woman

what is she wearing

SERIOUSLY WHAT IS THAT CUTOUT MAAM HOW DO YOUR C**CHY LIPS NOT POKE OUT

idk but this is fem!hisoka

“hey shouldnt we talk first” after getting handcuffed??? christ almighty these innuendos

siren??????? siren is probably also a “fake” homunculus

ugh

ok so the nurse is siren

ya aint slick girly

alphonse control your crush

I REFUSE!!!! ALMEI RIGHTS

why is al’s hair so brown in this flashback anywayssss

oh its spelled psiren ope

like she’s literally a batman villain...

oh my god...............the tiddy grab. my son would never

my son is respectful

is this her homunculus tat or just a random alchemy tat

the added plotlines and original content continue to confuse and astound me every single time....

ok but if psiren really was doing this for the hospital she wouldnt be so flashy about it. like thats how you get caught sweet cheeks

girly stop flirting with this child on god im gonna fucking kick you

now shes a nun????????????????

Shes a fucking troll i hate her

im going to kick alphonse into the sun 

oh great now shes a teacher

wow shes a savior. the savior of amestrian venice. greatttttt

ed looking exactly like this emoji on this gondola rn 🧍‍♀️

STOP FLIRTING WITH THE CHILD 

GOD THIS IS SO BATMAN VILLAIN ESQUE

alphonse plzzzzzzzzzz she aint your girl

ok so probably not the last we see of this ding dong con artist

ok so its starting to get muddy. im scared the 03 stans are gonna come after me like i do like it and im having fun watching it but some of the plot and characterization choices are just....odd??? idk i gotta keep going though!! im sorry i just stan arakawa and her work in all her glory!!!

[dreamingdolls]

I’m tired

CW: Lots of swearing because I’m done and meh, it’s a coping mechanism of sorts.

Tired. Fatigued. Exhausted. Whatever word you wanna use. A bunch of things both big and small have just been stacking up way too much over the past months and fuck it I need to vent and let it all out.

I’m tired of my mom going full fucking Karen with this pandemic, ignoring all the advice and regulations put into place and just about ridiculing me when I want to make sure I stick to them myself.

I’m tired of this guy in our gaming group constantly making snark remarks and jokes at me because he’s still hurt I dared not name him by name and instead list him as an “etc” (context: We splintered off from our WoW guild to play XIV, and wanted to ask if others wanted to join us, so I listed the people we play with there). You had been inactive for two months dude. I’ve already apologized but you’re still convinced I have some vendetta against you.

I’m tired of this friend who I’ve listened to his problems and tried to give advice to over and over and over still insisting on calling me dude when I’ve fucking told him I don’t want any male-gendered words directed my way. No I don’t care you use it as a “gender neutral” term. I don’t. End of story.

I’m tired of my mother claiming she’s oh so supportive of my being trans because gasp!! She doesn’t outright disown me for it!! Still deadnaming me and telling me I have to pretend for family and her colleagues though. “Oh but I’m only deadnaming you with my friends because I don’t want them to ask difficult questions.” Cool, if it’s all in my best interest, I say stop it, and if they do ask, idk, maybe fucking call them out on their bullshit and actually show you are supportive.

I’m tired of helping people achieve their goals in the games we play only for them to then turn a blind eye when I have a goal that requires group play. When I play with pugs more regularly than our actual group because yall got what you wanted how the fuck do you think I feel.

I’m tired of living in a world where it’s a nightmare to be autistic. The autism isn’t the issue. How people will treat you for it is. I’ve seen fake-progressives going all “don’t use the r-word” then turn around and use autism as an insult instead. Well fucking done. And you wonder why I just stay quiet. God fucking forbid my autism shows.

And on that note, I’m tired of being told shit is problematic and then nobody bothering to explain why. I’m tired of being afraid to even ask questions, because simply asking feels like it’s already going to get you fucking cancelled. Hi. Yeah. I’m autistic. I need shit explained *clearly* in words that don’t keep contradicting each other.

I’m fucking pissed off that I’m always there for people when they get shit news but when my father mailed me some weeks ago he never wants to see me again nobody even fucking bothered to ask me if I’m okay. Hell most people probably forgot because I didn’t make a huge scene out of it. Is that what it takes to get a fucking pulse? Yes I hate him. Have done so for years. But fuck me it’s still my father. It still fucking means I’m now never even going to have the chance of mending anything there.

I’m angry at this group I used to play with, that mine splintered off from, telling me I abandoned them cause I mostly play with my own group. I was literally the only one from the group that once was still trying to keep in touch with you guys and the thanks I get is a fucking “we dont want you back”. Fine. I can see why everybody wanted to get rid of you guys.

I’m tired of getting fucking abandoned by everyone. I can only make plans to play Overwatch with you and have you neglect it so many times. I can only hear you say “oh I’m gonna chill to end the night with these people” this many nights, like thanks, apparently us playing isn’t chill enough. I can only have my hopes raised only for them to be dropped that many times.

A special fuck you to the person who after lots of protesting got me to install LoL to play it with them, then one night after I bit the bullet and played Overwatch with her friend group, total strangers to me, we played my game and she told me I had upset her after accommodating to literally anything she wanted - she wanted to play HotS on US where I don’t have my full character roster despite the fact I played LoL on US for her so she could have her roster, it wouldn’t have made a damn difference for her cause she’d be new to HotS either way, then handpicking mode and what character I should play to best work with her pick and everything - and then just after half a year friendship and entrusting a lot of our personal lives to each other just randomly deciding to remove me off her friend list. Never explained what I had done wrong that night.

Fuck it, I’ll just admit it. With my other groups seemingly having decided they no longer wanted to play together I saw her as my best friend. Maybe even developed a crush. We literally played LoL every fucking night until like noon my time cause of time difference, laughed on voice chat and everything. And then bam. Gone. Just like that. I know she’s not gonna read this but fuck it. I miss her despite the anger I feel writing this.

I’m tired of being nice to people who turn out to be hateful.

I’m. So. Goddamn. Exhausted. And all of this needed to get out. So there.

[matamisin]

Consider: Mina is a genuinely happy and positive person, but everyone has bad days (especially people who have been thru trauma, like seeing your loved ones regularly beaten to a bloody pulp). The thing is that Mina just. Refuses to show that trauma has actually been effecting her. She starts suppressing negative reactions to situations bc she wants to "stay strong." Beginning of the year? She cried when they got rescued from USJ. End of the year? "Lmao guess we survived another one! Ha! Ha! :)"

oh my god like millennial humor?? if yeah then lmao mina please

if not ahhh Mina baby you have feelings too that you gotta tend to!\

Alright- All (or at least all the angst headcanons I received) are answered below the cut! Please be careful, there are some, well angsty things in there!

TW: Eating Disorder, Gore/ Graphic Depictions, Homophobia, Depression, Suicidal Tendencies/ Self harm mention, Death, Possible spoilers to those not caught up with the BNHA manga- Please ask to tag if I missed any!

(looking at all these warnings made me realize omfg YALL DID NOT HOLD BACK IM CRYING ASK AND THOU SHALT RECEIVETH I SUPPOSE)

a-single-eyelash asked:

Denki accidentally hurt someone as a kid, say a sibling or good friend, with his quirk. It made him hate his work, until he saw a hero with a similar work to his. This is what made him think that not only is his quirk cool, but also that he can become a hero. Well until, he hurt Sero. His boyfriend, got electrocuted by him on the battlefield. (Sorry this is an idea I’ve had for a fic)

O H

BRUH THAT HIT ME LIKE A TRAIN COMING OUT FROM BEHIND THE BUSHES I THOUHGT THERE WAS GONNA BE A HAPPY ENDING THIS IS STILL GOOD THO 

anonymous asked:

Bakugou is still sad, Sero is suicidal (Read to may fics about it man), Kami is legitimately afraid he’ll disappoint his parents, Tsu feels to normal, Kiri feeeeeelsss way to useless, and idk maybe Aoyama feels ignored. My own angsty headcanons.

Ah, yeah I can see how those can play into those characters!

anonymous asked:

Sero’s fight or flight response with a villains ice-like quirk (if your for that headcanon) OR Sero overwhelming his quirk trying to rescue a goddamn building of people

OH YA I AM FOR THAT

Also NO STOP HAVE I GOT SOMETHING IN STORE ABOUT COLLAPSING BUILIDINGS

anonymous asked:

Ashido + Bakugou bond over their quirks being destructive and not really knowing how to use them to actually *help* people

oh wow, I’ve never actually seen it that way.

But how about this: while they vent to each other about how their quirks can’t help people, the other is like, full on giving them descriptions of how their quirks actually CAN but they just never realized and they’re opening each other’s eyes while having their own insecurities knocked down

anonymous asked:

Omg your angst au is so angsty it’s beautiful

AH thank you haha!

anonymous asked:

Angsty headcannon boi-  Sero was bullied in middle school for having wonky teeth and actually had braces. Which is why he has such a pearly white smile now.  Sero was the last in his class to get his quirk and when he did he was laughed at because it was a ‘useless quirk’

n O ANON IM SOB

IM CRYING LEAVE HIM ALONE ILL SQUARE UP WITH THOSE BULLIES

anonymous asked:

Angst head cannon.  Sero flinches whenever kirishima hardens.  Sero’s parents are majorly homophobic and are actually quite strict. So whenever sero isn’t with bakusquad he tries to revise but it doesn’t work and he’s scared to ask for help.

Aw, man that’s heart wrenching to have parents so unsupportive- I feel it :( He’s just in a constant worry state whenever they’re around

anonymous asked:

If you’re still accepting the angst hcs… i think kaminari gets like really overcharged whenever there’s a storm and since they moved to the dorms there’s nowhere for him to release all the excess energy. So he just kinda hides away in his room in pain.

Aw, that’s terrible!

I dunno.. I feel like that one day when someone finds out during a storm, they’ll like, ask the teachers about “where someone could discharge a lot of energy askingforafriend” and they immediately know who they’re talking about and they’ll ask Powerloader and Mei and others in their department to build something for him to discharge all the excess AND be able to utilize it somehow :0 just a thought!

anonymous asked:

My headcannons: Sero is anorexic Bakugou has PTSD Kaminari has depression Kirishima had self-esteem issues Ashido is perfect (canon)

Oh that last part- she is, she is *clap**clap*

Though.. I will say that just because the others are haunted by those- it doesn’t make them less perfect. It’s their struggles that they learn to cope with and grow from, and it makes them, well, them. Not a definition of perfect can define that :’)

(sorry just speaking from my thoughts cause these hit close to home ahhh)

anonymous asked:

Lmao i sent a lot sorry if their not the best but hopefully some heart strings will be pulled

NONSENSE ANON ALL MY HEART STRINGS WERE PLUCKED BY ALL THESE AND NOW ITS YALLS TURN

transcandydemon asked:

Todocanon; todoroki has constant nightmares of the boiling water incident and of his father hurting him or his mom which causes him to not get as much sleep ie his calm attitude and how he’s not quick to get into conversations because of exhaustion

oh ya, such a traumatic past is def something that could still be haunting him in his dreams :’( but when the others notice, they’ll make sure to check up on him and try to find ways to help reduce nightmares or at least comfort him whenever they’re in his dreams

anonymous asked:

Deku head canon : deku is super jealous of kirishimas and bakugoa relationship since hes been trying to get close to kacchan for years and kirishima managed to do it within days

D’: He probably would feel that- jealousy’s very strong! But ah, in my personal opinion, i think he’d feel that, but after time learns that maybe it was best that he stopped dwelling on it and moves on, and learns to accept and be happy that he and Bakugou could at least be acquaintances that could eventually work well :’)

anonymous asked:

Denki headcanon: where he wants to be as close to bakugo as kirishima is and he tries so damn hard but takes bakugos insults to heart and he really does get torn up and upset about it(ex: the sports festival scene )

Oh wait which scene? Dunce face or?? :0 but yeah, I feel like he’d take it to heart at times. (but my bakukami heart tells me to say that when Baku realizes he gives him a good ass pep talk and beings hold back on his insults, or reassures Denki)

anonymous asked:

Bakugou could have PTSD and nightmares

Oh same headcanon! :’D Ah, but poor Bakugou. I’m sure the others would take it into mind and be aware of it and help him subtly so as to not provoke him, :’(

violetsare-tblue asked:

Bakugo: because of his inferiority complex, feels like he needs to prove himself over and over or he’ll be just the victim again  Iida: his left arm is completely numb. He isn’t paralyzed and he can move it. He just can’t feel anything in his hand or arm. Makes holding hands with someone feel empty and useless  Sero: he is so scared of being worthless as a hero and a person. He doesn’t want to be left behind by his classmates so he overworks himself and comes to school with random bruises

Oh mmhmm, I definitely see the Bakugou one! Especially after what he said during his fight with Deku, it def shows :(

Aw, Iida probably still looks back at his actions back in the Stain arc and regrets the errors of his ways. Luckily, I’m sure he’ll find someone who helps him through it and reminds him that mistakes don’t define him :’)

:’( Serooo MAKING ME CRY

casua-aria asked:

I have this Sero headcanon where he was the disposable (like how when tape dispensers run out and become disposable) friend in groups throughout his childhood, but now that he goes to UA, he has true caring friends that would never do that to him.

D: !!

That’s so sad- he must have thought his quirk was just life taunting him for being “disposable” hence the tape quirk :( but heck yeah, once he meets the students of UA he definitely begins to see that he wasn’t the problem in the past, but rather those that he was “friends” with!

anonymous asked:

Sero remembering very clearly all the pain that happened when his arm got cut off, maybe being a little scared of Kirishima for a few days after he first wakes up? Idk

OH YEAH THAT ONE HURTS

Like maybe.. once he’s able to respond again, he flinches and has an anxiety attack when he sees Kirishima because the sight of him just sends a flood of the memory to play in his head OOF

anonymous asked:

A personal favorite that nobody’s really thought of: a villain cuts off one finger from each of Ochako’s hands so she can’t use her quirk

OH MAN THATS BRUTAL OMG

That’s so dark!! I feel like a villain would do that should they get a hold of her and, mm maybe wanna rile up someone close to her to lure them in

meptoonzart asked:

Kirishima traitor

b R U H ID CRY MY EYES OUT IF HORI MADE HIM THE TRAITOR

                                                                                                                             Anonymous said:                                                                 

I have a lot of angsty headcanons about Kaminari specifically so I’ll just spam you with those. He attracts electricity, so he often gets struck by lightning and has almost died from it twice. Kaminari knows people think he’s the traitor and it eats him up inside every day. He’s been ‘propositioned’ by quite a few creeps because he’s pretty and his quirk is, well, what it is. He has nightmares a lot and it causes power outages, he’s terrified his classmates will hate him for it.(1/?(Idk2maybe)            

Sero got into a fight with someone after the sports festival, because how the hell did he make it into UA’S hero course, and Kaminari happens to be with him and he actively threatens the dude who started the fight with his quirk. No one bullies his friends. His overuse of his quirk is slowly killing him, he hasn’t told anyone that it’s destroying his brain. Bakugo reminds him of living in an abusive household but he doesn’t know how to say it so he laughs it off.(2/?(Okaymaybe4wearegettingthere)             

Kirishima and Sero are the first to find out about both the frying brain and the abusive household, and Sero asks Kaminari if he wants to go try something. Kaminari says sure and Sero reserves a training ground for them, and Sero swings around with Kaminari and he hopes it works for Kami the same way it does for him. Sero is smiling because he doesn’t know what else to do, but swinging through the air helps him feel better and free. It helps. But there’s always, always the anxiety (¾)  

the anxiety of ‘Maybe today is the day I fall’, but he doesn’t realize that Kaminari is helping him stay grounded. He won’t fall. Not when he gets to see Kaminari fuller of life than he’s ever been. They land on one of the buildings in ground Beta, and laugh like idiots as it starts to rain. Kaminari’s dying, Sero is a mess, and they just sit there for hours, past the end of their reservation, talking through their anxieties. Kaminari is scared to die. Sero is scared to lose him. (Okay1more4/5)        

Sero promises Kaminari he’ll be there, he’ll do everything he can to help keep him alive as long as possible, and he asks Kaminari how long he has from his last estimate. Kaminari laughs, starting to cry. Six years. Sero tells the Bakusquad, and they promise him that they’ll be there when the time comes. Not villains or Dadzawa could stop them, and finally it does. For only being a hero for three years, he’s made history for kids who have terminal illnesses (ranoutofspacedammit)      

 And the drawbacks of quirks come more into light. Kaminari may not be a great student or hero, but he brought hope to a lot of people, and everyone will miss him. They can’t hear thunder crack without thinking of him, can’t see the golden sunrise without thinking of his smile. Can’t even bear to look at the classic lit section in a bookstore. He saved people and raised awareness, but he wrecked their hearts as well. (Somehow this turned into a near-fic I’m so sorry Hope you’re doing well(Done))       

ANON OMG THANK YOU FOR THIS BASICALLY FIC IM CRYING THERES SO MUCH I DONT EVEN KNOW WHERE TO START CRYING   

iamnootthedabmast-r said:                                                                     

Heard you want some angsty headcannons- so Kaminari tends to stay up due to his quirk and he likes to stay in the dormitory lobby, so he just sits on the couch on his phone or just sits there in the dark- but this leads to him finding some secretive angsty stuff about other people in the dormitory for ex; Bakugou comes downstairs and just starts cooking cause he has terrible night terrors and Kaminari just quietly witnesses as Bakugou cries silently while he eats. (Part 1)    

(Part 2) the next morning Kaminari kind of wants to try ask or comfort him but feels rude and awkward so he also kind of struggles with the knowledge of knowing that everyone in his class is a little to a lot of broken.  So yeah, sorry if it’s a little confusing- in awkward when it comes to writing what I want to write…

DUUDE THIS IS SUCH A SAD CONCEPT IF YOU WRITE IT I WILL LEGITERALLY PERISH ON SPOT

                                                                                                                             Anonymous said:                                                   

May we… suggest directly… angsty oneshots? Please feel free to ignore this if you preferred hcs

 (lmao sorry, im not caught up with the manga or anime to know what the first part is referrring to :’D) but ah yeah I’ve seen that headcanon, not too sure how to feel, but it’s out there!                   

[themanicgalaxy]

SPN 5X1 Sympathy for the Devil

THUNDERSTRUCK OPENS SEASON 5 OH HELL YEAH

aight, lucifer's back, i got six episodes to catch up on(two weekends) AND YOU'VE BEEN THUNDERSTRUCKKKKK

WHAT THE HELL WAS THAT EFFECT AHAHAHA

yeah I see why tumblr likes it, it's the mainstream version of itself

not that that made sense, but IT'S SEASON 5 TIME!

oh this is a NICE lighting effect?

oo interesting transition?

zachariah?

ok so the beam kills the plane ?

why are they on the plane ?

ah yes the late 2000s sure were a Fun Time

PLEASE FUCKING TALK TO EACH OTHER I SWEAR TO GOD I AM SO TIRED OF THIS

YES IT'S MY COPING MECHANISM TOO, BUT I'M NOT HUNTING THE DEMONS

CHUCK FUCKING SCARED ME DAMN

no Sam's Totally not a Demon it's Fine

Cas? Dead?

boy you sure can try

Exploded Cas HAHAHA HE HAS A MOLAR IN HIS HAIR

oh good it's zach

"it's apocalypse now" feels like a reference to...apocalypse now heh

the vessel oho the planting and payoff

O H TH AT WAS C L E V ER DEAN!

WHERE IS C A S WHERE IS THE ANGEL

does...Dean know about Ruby

hey they said the roll credits

o Dean doesn't know about the voicemail

ASFPHSIHF i hate you people

ah Dean the "let's move on let's move on let's move on"

Oh ok the vessel

WAIT THEY NEED CONSENT RIGHT THE POINTED SET UP

hoh that is a lot of blood

IS BECKY A W*NCESTIE SHIPPER WHAT THE F U C K

well this is a very nice portrayal of fans

jesus christ

i mean to be fair, there ARE some fans like this but still bad

what the actual HELL she's in the season premiere?

this is Strange

please god don't bring up the Fanfics

i do like the critique of their own show at least briefly

although it's being made fun of...?

"can you quit touching me?"

scene change scenE CHANGE

SWORD OF MICHAEL

ah macguffin plot

GO DO R E S E A R C H

Dean really wants to Not Think About it

Bobby..?

B O B B Y ?

it's not Bobby, it's not, it can't be

NO HE LOOKS SO SAD

look I get it they need support, but not being coddled is important

some middle ground ig

CLEVER DEAN ! C L E V E R!

yep! not Bobby!

felt WAY too out of character

MEG! HOLY HELL I DIDN'T KNOW SHE SHOWED UP THIS EARLY

MEGMEGMEGMEG

AND IT SOUNDS LIKE HER! OH MY GOD

oo villain hero banter god I love having that

the flirting thing is weird ok fine do your fetish thing

BOBBY?

B O B B Y ?

NO ! NONONO! ARE YOU KIDDING ME THERE'S NO WAY

goddamn i love Meg

what the FUCK happened to exorcisms yall

aww the baby crying woke mina awwwwww

she's a protective fucker

oh the bloody crib imagery is FUCKED it's VERY nice

oh thank GOD they take him to a hospital

I thought castle said CASTIEL lol

also NICE imagery

ok lots of dead guys

"oh thank god the angels are here" pfftahaha

yeah Dean's the michael sword whoopsie

DID YOU FUCK THE MICHAEL SWORD CASTIEL

"wad of insecurity and self loathing" pfft

why didn't they just say vessel

ANGEL CONDOM

oh the Bang and instant leg break is nice

AH CONSENT

C L E V E R D E A N

"it is written" free will babyyyy

ah uses Bobby as leverage

jeez

altho angel power is INTENSE

"are we having fun yet" OH HELL

seriously hbo spn would be INTENSE body horror what do you mean no lungs

C A S! CASCAS!!!

HE'S ALIVE! I MEAN I KNEW BUT CAS

INTENSE CURLY HAIRED CAS

S I G I L PROTECTIVE S I G I L

"no i carved it into your ribs" THE DELIVERY AHAHAHA

just doesn't answer ok then

~I'm an angel~

at least he flagged lucifer, I was hoping someone would

the angels rly do be "gaslight gatekeep girblossing"

i do find a lucifer plot line played straight interesting! who'd a thunk

ok seriously, it was TOO easy to find someone wronged by god

oo the don't lie thing, that's neat

jeez, they rly had the budget of Nothing

Bobby oh my God

THE GED QUOTE! THAT WAS THIS!

"I got no idea, but I got a GED and a give em hell attitude, we'll figure it out" HAHAHA I L O V E H I M

look at least SOMEONE doesn't cut them off

"I deserve a medal for this" pffttt

hey they're framing Dean taller

ALSO HIS HAIR IS A BIT FLUFFY! GOOD! IT LOOKS GOOD!

"I don't think we can ever be what we were"

this feels Real and I HATE it

and they split up with a SHOT OF THE LAMP

god the glass is chewy tonight

1. God+Disillusionment. Ok here's the thing: the whole scene where Lucifer didn't even have to do much to convince Nick? I think? to go against God feels important. Like it feels as if God has abandoned us, and we want to get back at him. Absent Father narrative, mixed with a bit of ye old exceptionalism(you're all mighty and all powerful, why didn't you help me). It...obviously I don't know who's idea it was to go this way, or what lens they were viewing this through specifically, but that convincing(and what Nick believed so he could let himself be convinced) felt important both in the context(vague 2009, after the crash) and in the story. I feel like this theme will show up later.

2. clever Dean. Dean got like three clever moments this episode, and a good pep talk. And I really like the trade off! The "let's not think about it until it blows over I'm totally fine ahaha" fucks him up when it comes time to deal with his relationship with his brother, but this desire to move forward(and the actual intelligence to think ahead like damn) helped them actually get to places. and at the end, he does a pep talk! he's learned how people work a bit! like the nuance and the showing off his good skills makes me happy.

3. lucifer played straight. So I realize this came out like...a decade before the Lucifer show. but having a Lucifer that has quiet daddy issues and have them be played entirely straight wasn't something I thought would be as compelling as it was. The actress for Lucifer was very good, which probably helped, but to have Lucifer be Sincere(seeming) and actually believe in his point was interesting and a bit refreshing

also i liked that the name was recognized, feels more realistic

4. probably need a callout. Like I get it, they're the main heroes, they did their best, but they DEFINITELY needed a call out or at least a chat that wasn't the End of the episode. They did their best, I get not siding with the angels, but SOMETHING has to be done. You can't build the "everything is shit" narrative and say idk we're probably gonna fix it lol in the framing device you have set up. Where's ur power fantasy? what are you gonna do with him?

5. Bobby. Listen, I love Bobby. I can tell how you know it's just a Bit off. And while they did need a bit of chewing out, I do appreciate how Bobby's like "priority one, make sure they know I'm not gonna leave" like it makes him a good dad, if a not great hunter, and I really like that. I like how Bobby's weak spot is surrogate kids, that makes me happy.

7. the confrontation. Ok listen, I need that in there. The framing(like I said, they're framing Dean as a bit taller than they would in later seasons(possibly as writers shift their focus from Sam to Dean, a trend that seems to Keep Going)), it puts him a bit higher. The dialogue felt real, like to the point of, whether or not it was accurate to the story or not, it felt like two real family members talking. Like "I can't get rid of you, but we can't be what we were?" heartbreaking. I love glass. And yeah, that final shot of Dean walking away from Sam is pretty obvious HOWEVER Dean is shot with a lamp. It either means Cas or just the angels in general, and whether that's a "he's the michael sword and Sam's lucifer(invoked in this convo)" type thing or a "cas is on Dean's side, and as Cas is in the right so is Dean" type thing, it's Interesting to look at. And it's SUPER deliberate, this cANNOT have been done on accident.

8. Second Meg supremacy, first Ruby supremacy

ighty night night time to go pry the kitty off of me

[budoodly]

aight yall im pretty annoyed rn so we’re gonna learn some shit about privilege and venting. 

i’m specifically gonna talk about straight people and lgb people but you can substitute literally any power dynamic; white people and poc, cis people and trans people, men and women, able bodied people and disabled people, neurotypical people and neurodivergent, etc

anyway. straight people are currently considered to be the “default” in western society. we assume that a male child is going to grow up and like girls, and vice versa. it’s nothing anyone says, or a conscious decision we make when looking at people, but in our society, you are straight until proven gay. this is called heteronormativity.

this causes a power imbalance between straight people and lgb people. as a result of straight people being assumed default, lgb people are considered anomalies, and are told that we are weird, against nature, and that our very existence must be political and r rated. this leads to a lot of outright violence, verbal abuse, and unequal legislation against lgb people. 

“but kayleigh,” you may be asking. “why are you putting a fully sourced academic essay about straight privilege on my dash?” 

because as an lgb person, i have witnessed, endured, and help friends through all of the above, and afterward, we go on the internet, and we jokingly say, “man, i hate straight people,”because we’ve had a long ass day and humor is a very popular method of coping with your struggles these days.

however, we then, almost immediately, begin receiving hateful messages and even death threats for DARING to jokingly say such a thing. we’re told that we are no better than the straight people who say the same. and i’m calling bullshit.

when straight people say “i hate gay people” they are coming from a place of malevolence. when straight people say “gay people suck,” they are not joking, they are reaffirming that because we exist at all, we are horrible. and affirmations like that fuel the people who beat and kill us.

when gay people say “i hate straight people,” it is because we have been beaten and abused by straight people who believe that we don’t have a right to live, and it has been proven time and time and time and time again that we should be wary of them. when gay people say stuff like that, it’s because some of us can’t come out at work or we’ll lose our jobs, some of us can’t come out to family because we’ll get kicked out of the house or abused or even killed, or some of us can’t come out to friends because they will immediately abandon us or view us as predatory with no reason. when we say it, it’s not a malevolent statement, we don’t wish harm, we don’t hate every single straight person on the entire planet, but apparently some of you with no critical thinking skills interpret us that way.

so, yeah. if you want to come to me and tell me that i have no right to be pissed off with my oppressors and tell me that i have no right to fucking vent on my private blog, i’ll redirect you to this long ass essay and prescribe some fucking critical thinking skills.

[chogisad]

hey um tell me ur fav thing about each member (ot9 or ot12 is fine) bc i need something beautiful and pure to read ~sappy jongdae anon

Minseok: is so versatile !!! i literally love every thing about him from his lil “mashmellowwwww” to his lil nose and his pretty eyes and his voice !!! HIS VOICE OKAY. his voice is putting on my favorite scarf in october and the wind gently blowing my hair away from my face. his voice is the soft glow of a bedside lamp at 8 pm when im writing a poem about all the things i love. his voice is autumn leaves and warm apple cider and me calling my mom to tell her i got an a on my exam. anyway,

Junmyeon: UM HIS BUNNY SMILE. Jun tries so hard to be professional and a leader™ but when hes just himself and his lil eyes light up and he makes dumb jokes and waits for everyone around him to cringe thats when my power is at its peak. and aLSO. Junmyeon deserves SO MUCH CREDIT OKAY. Junmyeon is one of the best leaders in the industry because hes honestly carried so many burdens by his lil lonesome self??? and i have a lot of respect for him because yeah, he had to grow up a bit faster than the rest u know, and yeah, he cant always be giggly and loud, but when he IS, omg. anyway. junmyeon deserves respect and love and a nap. hes the funniest member in exo stop denying it !!!!

Yixing: i think my heart has a special smile reserved just for yixing??? i think one of my favorite things about him is when hes about to go REALLY HARD on a dance, he puts on a black cap???? its a symbol of hiS POWER. and the fact that he wants to play a dinosaur !!! yes bby!!!! the trex from jurassic park who???? i only know a zhang yixing !!!!!

Baekhyun: bbh is my sunlight trash son. he never shuts the fuck up and i love him. hes literally a human pterodactyl and i will forever be in awe at how much LOVE HE HAS IN HIS SMOL ASS HEART??? HAV U SEEN HOW HE LOOKS AT US??? WHEN WILL SOMEONE LOVE ME AS MUCH AS BBH LOVES EXO-LS.

Chanyeol: hes a smol in the body of a tol !!!!!!! chanyeol is just a lil pup who wants to be loved hes those gifs of large dogos who dont know theyre large doggos and they jump on their small owners !!!! SOMEONE PLZ JUST RUFFLE HIS HAIR THATS ALL HE WANTS.

Jongdae: :3 IS LITERALLY DAE. when i read that article about how he donates to charity under the name matteo i legit cried like real ass tears because jongdae is honestly just a good. fucking. person. hes that friend who doesnt always get what youre going through because they havent hurt like that but they validate what you feel, they give it importance, and ppl who have jd in their life r so so so lucky i love him. ALSO he goes so shy when ppl tell him they love him ???? like he tries to laugh it off but he just smiles so soft and god. im gonna explode this is too much.

Kyungsoo: satansoo isnt real. kyungsoo is soft and quiet and respectful and ppl dont always get that. kyungsoo loves ppl earnestly; his love doesnt have to be flashy or in your face. kyungsoo is like your favorite sweater ur mom gave you years ago. its not fancy or expensive or flashy but its always comforting in this really gentle way.

Jongin: hes a kid trying his best okay. everyone is a lil problematic and yall know what im vaguing at and i really do hope he does better but i dont think hes a bad person at all. and that interview he did about reading and coping made me feel a lot of things. I think because of the way society handles things, jongin has been put in a position none of the other members have experienced, and hearing him talk about how he learned to love his skin made me cry a little because same okay. i had to stop blogging about him for a while but i missed his lil sunshine smile and im still rooting for him.

Sehun: MY TINY BEAUTIFUL SUN FAIRY PRINCE LOVE OF MY LIFE ACTUAL ANGEL ON EARTH. SEHUN. I LITERALLY WOULD LAUNCH MYSELF INTO SPACE AND GRAB HIM A STAR IF HE ASKED. Sehun is the most precious boy on this planet and must be protected. hes literally ??????????????? so special. always trying his best. always challenging himself. always trying to make other people happy and proud. sehun lives his life in such bright colors and with so much sincerity !!!!! hes a smol and i would legit hand make him a night light out of star dust because its what he deserves !!!!!!

kris: kris wants u to think hes edgy and cool but hes really just a giant dork that probably cried while watching shrek !!!!!! 

tao: okay that gifset of him telling that one kid how unique his voice is made me cry. because i think tao did a lot of growing up in the last few years and hes honestly transformed into such an incredible solo artist and idk. hes still a smol in my eyes and i want to tuck him in and bring him warm milk but hes all grown up now !!!!!

luhan: MY LIL DEER OKAY. LUHAN IS OUT THERE DOING HIS THING, LIVING HIS CUTE DRAMA FREE LIFE AND I RESPECT HIM FOR THAT. YALL. HE FOUND HIS SOUND AND IS NOW RELEASING MUSIC HE LOVES–MUSIC I LOVE– AND TRYING TO FIND HIS PLACE IN THIS BIG OL WORLD. AND YALL HERE CATCH ME WHEN I FALL. BECAUSE I CRY EVERY TIME. I HOPE LUHAN KNOWS HOW MUCH I LOVE HIM AND HOW GREAT HES DOING.

anyway, i love exo. they make me so happy. like so so happy. also, sappy jongdae anon ur the best.

ask me things!

[bpdkipland]

literally do them all lmao For the strawberry: a lizard person, a little gray alien, an orb, and the Burger King himself For mr horse: ur opinion on the Charmin toilet paper bears

thank you so much anon fuc ily 

🐰 what is one secret that you’ve never told anyone? 

yikes startin out w a hard one then um when i was a kid i had such a stressful emotional time that it caused me to wet the bed until i was like 12 or 13? it was fuct up 

💗 if you could hug anyone, who would it be? 

probs my crush or my friend jacob bc he gives gr8 hugs ♥♥

🐹 what are some of your favourite Pokémon and why? 

Lugia bc when i was little i had a card that was all holographic and it had lugia on it. i never really got super into pokemon lol 

🌠 if you were in charge of the world, what would the world look like? 

oh god it would be a mess 

👀 what was the most recent vivid dream that you had? 

honestly the only one coming to mind is the one i had as a kid where this creature opened up its head and ate my sister and im still scared of going outside in the dark to this day bc of it 

☀️ what do you like the most about your best friend? 

i have multiple best friends but theyre mostly all there for me whenever i need them? like one time jacob drove from the other side of town to give me earbuds bc i had lost mine 

😘 talk about your crush or partner 

GOD my crush is a literal angel???? like????? hoy fuk i love her so much she’s so sweet and kind and caring and she just radiates light and love and i got to kiss her on new years ♥♥♥♥

💁 if someone was rude to you, would you be rude back? 

depends on HOW rude they were. like,... i was nice to my ex for so long lol 

🌟 what do you like about yourself? (must choose at least 3 things!) 

i like my nose, freckles, and the fact that im Nice

🐾 what are you scared of most? how will you overcome it? 

well its being abandoned by everyone i love and guess what thats starting to happen and im coping lmao

🎁 what never fails to make you happy? 

this video

💙 what annoys you about some people? 

if they chew with their fockin mouth open i die 

😤 do you get angry easily? 

nope i actually am pretty slow to anger lol 

🐇 what do you always daydream about? 

do intrusive thoughts of people coming on to me count 

🌻 if you could change 3 things about the world what would you change? 

well no offense but republicans would be illegal. sent off to an island not allowed to communicate with the rest of the world lol, strawberries would be in season year round, and weed would be legal bc i cant think of anything else 

🍓 send me 4 names: kiss, befriend, kill or marry? 

kiss: orb ♥♥befriend: lizard person kill: k i l l t h e b o r g (burger king) marry: gray alien 

✈️ what is your dream city and why? 

ive not been to any good cities so i dont know 

☕️ talk about your ideal day 

hanging out with all my friends, they dont all hate each other, we all watch movies in a big cuddle puddle and im in the middle of it ♥♥

🌸 are you an introvert, ambivert or extrovert? 

definitely an ambivert. 

💧 when was the last time you cried? 

fuck????? i dont remember???? my eyes welled up yesterday does that count 

🎵 name 5 songs you love at the moment 

in no particular order: 1. Come On Eileen 2. Insomnia (by Dirty Heads) 3. Birdhouse in Your Soul4. Ana Ng5. Moving On (by James)

⚡️ if you had any superpower, what would it be and why? 

pyrokinesis so i can light all abusers on fire lol 

💛 if you could talk to your younger self, what would you say? 

Listen, kid, there’s a reason you hate yourself and there’s a reason you wanna die all the time but lemme tell you, it ain’t worth it. those hospital stays aren’t worth it. you might not believe it but you’re over 250 days clean! didn’t think you’d make it this far, huh? you also made it to 18 years of age. you’re gonna be okay, kid. 

💚 who are you jealous of and why? 

myself when i’m in a nice mood bc like??? shut yo nice ass up 

💎 which one would you rather have more of: intelligence, beauty, kindness, wealth or bravery? why? 

bravery honestly. i have reasons but i dont have words for the reasons rn 

🙊 what are you ashamed of? 

um that secret i told the fuck

🌺 which languages do you know? which do you want to learn? 

i know English and tiny bits of French and i’d love to become fluent in French and Italian? 

🍀 if you could be any fictional character’s best friend/lover, which fictional character would you be? 

i wanna be best friends with mike wazowski 

☁️ talk about your dream universe. 

???????

💜 which acts of kindness are you going to do today? 

it’s a bit late but did do some dishes for my mom cleaned off my desk so i could start painting again :> 

🐬 if you could transform into any animal/magical creature, what would you be and why? 

new c/r/yptid: Lance Cube.

🍄 talk about someone/something you really dislike 

y’know when ur eyes just start crying when the rest of u is fine?? like wow i didnt know i was supposed to be emotional but ig???? 

😣 talk about some things that have been making you depressed/angry/anxious lately 

i’m anxious because my doctors office isnt giving my medical records to the michigan works people im working with so they cant open a case for me, making it so they cant help me find a job bc of my mental illnesses 

   🍪 what did you want to be as a kid, and what do you want to be now?

 i wanted to be a veterinarian but now i wanna be a zookeeper 

🍰 what are some of your favourite sugary foods? 

i loooove peach rings and sour patch kids and !!!! strawberry shortcake 

🍑 what are you obsessed with? 

animal crossing tbh i love it so much 

💘 what happens to you when you’re stressed? 

i get auditory hallucinations and i just start crying no matter what stressed mood im in. angry stressed? crying. happy stressed? crying. anxious stressed? crying 

😪 what are you sick of? 

having kidney disease??? ?

🙀 are you an adrenaline seeker? 

i mean? sometimes? but yall gotta talk me into going on roller coasters 

💥 what are some unpopular opinions that you have? 

red beet eggs are my LIFE if i could eat them daily i would die, peppers are fucking gross, and tea is fucking gross unless its Tea 

☔️ would you consider yourself a good person? 

i like to think i am a good person? 

😊 what do you like to do as hobbies? 

draw & sing!!!! 

🎤 what’s the last song you hummed or sang by yourself? 

You Ain’t No Saint by Aaron West and The Roaring Twenties 

🐝 what’s your worst trait? how are you planning to improve it?

I’m annoying. I plan on improving it by shutting my ass up 

 🎨 what do you always doodle when you’re bored?

i draw people and eyes mainly. and the occasional hand 

🐻 what’s stopping you from chasing your dreams? 

i’m too shy and bisexual for this 

🌷 what’s your mbti personality and why do you think it suits you? 

fuck i dont remember i just know i have the same one as Fox Mulder and thats why it fits me lmao

🐶 send me 3 fictional people and I’ll choose my favourite! 

...u didnt give me 3 ppl.... 

👑 who are your favourite celebrities and why? 

mothman because he’s my boyfriend 

🐴 opinion on __? (Charmin Toilet Paper Bears) 

they wipe my ass for me 

🍋 do you consider yourself an emotional person? 

i used to be. now im not so sure. 

📚 share 3 books that you love and your favourite quote from them. 

yall i’ve only read 3 books 

😔 what do you always do when you feel sad? does it help?

i usually mope around and sleep a lot. it doesnt help usually. 

😌 what thoughts keep you going when you’re sad? 

Death Anxiety 

🌍 which country do you live in? 

USA! 

🐧 describe yourself in 3 words 

needy, petty, and damaged 

🐵 which quotes changed you? 

“What’s your Fursona” - @thebpdevil“Your job is to break death’s heart” 

💭 do you keep a diary? 

I keep a bullet journal!! i think thats kinda similar 

💫 who inspires you? 

honestly my dad??? but also idk :/ 

👻 do you believe in ghosts and why? 

hell YES because i am one

🎀 what’s your fashion sense like? 

department store clearance section & band merch 

🎬 what are some of your favourite films? 

Heathers, Taken, Girl Interrupted, and if u watch the OA in one shot it counts as a movie i’m counting it 

🍦 what is one treasured childhood memory? 

Throwing mashed potatoes at my sister. 

🐱 what’s your dream pet like? 

Cat snake (ferret) who loves to cuddle and doesnt bite :-) 

🐼 if you could meet anyone, who would it be? 

probably???? um???? Patrick Stump or Pete Wentz honestly. 

HOO THIS WAS FUN AND IT TOOK OVER AN HOUR TO DO THANK YOU 

[themanicgalaxy]

SPN 5X8 Changing Channels

oH FUCK YEAH it'S META TIME!!

I genuinely do think this is what helped popularize this shit oh HELL YEAH

it'S FUCKING G A B R I E L YA B O I

HE IS ALSO COMPLEX

JENSEN NARRATING BUT NOT WITH THE DEAN VOICE

CANNED LAUGHTER

THE COLOR BUT IT'S STILL THE OLD MOTEL LAYOUT

J U S T THE END OF THE WORLD

ALSO HIS HAIRCUT+color DOES NOT WORK IT'S GREAT

SON OF A BITCH AHAHA

HIS FUCKING VOICE CRACK

WHO WROTE THIS GODDAMN INTRO

tHIS INTRO IS SO FUNNY

also sidenote, it's so weird seeing them smile so much

DR SEXY

same pattern as the old time but you can SEE the color grading

huh like there's Something Wrong

and then business as usual

but like yeah they have to interview her

incredible hulk?

BANNER OR NORTON PFFT

Ah the TV version DEAN YOU NERD

a cartoon hole in the door the shape of the incredible hulk

oh it was HIM?

like he was a hothead, got killed by a hothead....

G A B RI E L

sam appealing to him is...interesting wait where is this going

facebook friends lmao Dean you Mom

he fucked with their radio didn't he

damn but he'S SMART

YOU'RE IN DOCTOR SEXY NOW LMAOOOO

THEY'RE SO FREAKED OUT

THEY'RE IN A MEDICAL TELENOVELA I'M CRYING

dammit I wish they let Dean grow his hair out the new lighting is making me sad

Dean's escapism is crashing down, it's great

Dean oh my GOD YOU FUCKING HYPERFIXATED NERD

DOCTOR SEXY

he does the...same lowered voice he does with Cas

ok listen there is a case to be made for hero worship, there IS but there's ALSO THE OTHER ONE

THE ABORTED HALF SMILE

the close ups work for him though?

oh the FREEZE! OH THAT'S NEAT!

HEY GABRIEL!

he morphs shorter lmaoooo

holy SHIT he's fun

the LIL GLITCH OUT OH MY GOD

THE EYEBROW WAG

GUYS HE HAS A POINT YALL WERE THE ONES THAT FUCKED UP

SAM IS SO TIRED OF THE MELODRAMA AHAHA

ah he gets killed again

dammit Gabe stop killing Dean

that's 100% not how surgery works

LMAO "figure it out"

what..the fuck did Sam do

THE FUCKING LADY

THAT WORKED??

and they switched to NUTCRACKER LMAOOO

THEY DON'T SPEAK JAPANESE

DEAN'S FACE!

SAM'S FACE

LMAOOOOO

commMERICALLL

CAS!

HE SOUNDS SO DISGRUNTLED!

NO IT WAS SO FUN TO SEE HIMMM

pretty boy angels?? WHAT?

whaT THE FUCK WAS THAT QUESTION

THE FUCKING JAPANESE?

oh my god the play along

that worked?

so they have to play along

boy they are both PANICKING

"I've got...genital herpes"

they're really going for the STD's with Sam for the last two episodes

thIS LOOKS LIKE IT'S PHYSICALLY PAINING HIM

I am CACKLING THIS IS

SO FUNNY

also...it's picking on Sam, maybe it's like...Gabe has a point to make with him?

also yeah he did kill Dean like a hundred times to make a point maybe he feels bad

"we might die in here" [canned laughter]

CAS!

no CAS!!

he looks genuinely shocked/scared oh my GOD!

the priorities tho!

Sam: u know him?

Dean: IS HE OK??

"play your roles out there" OHHH NEAT?

ah he just wants Chaos

he's not even happy? like "let's get it over with" is pretty neutral?

he's...not in league with anyone? he's kinda Weird about it?

ah so it's an actual ultimatum huh

they look good in this lighting at least?

"I am wearing sunglasses at night" LMAOOO

HE HATES PROCEDURAL COP SHOWSSS

THE STRUTTT

GRAVELLY VOICE

thE FUCKING POSES

THIS IS SO STUPID OH MY GOD

play along till stab stab?

ah they figured it was a fakeout

silent communication!

you can't telll if it's real or not..ever?

SAM'S IN A FUCKING RADIO

IT'S ANOTHER GENRE SHOWWWW

The vISUALS

HE'S THE CARRRR LMAO

ah he guesses, because of that field trip with cas

Car!Sam is so FUCKING FUNNY

GOTTEM! ANGEL!!!

Dean rly wanted to make that joke

"call it personal experience but no one gets that angry unless they're talking about their own family" O h M y gOD

oh shit I forgot technically we didn't know his name till now

hE JOINED THE PAGANS OH MY GOD

"watching them tear at each other" even though you love everyone involved...jesus

ah it's happening again

"I just want it to be over" :(

"It's about two brothers that loved each other and betrayed each other" uh OUCH

"you were born to this" oh JEEZ

ah yes the one kills the other

you have to at least admire their tenacity

"I wish this were a TV show, easy answers" oW

especially with Dean

"and it's gonna end bloody for all of us"

"hey, bro" aw

the bloody trench-coat oof

"you being too afraid to stand up to your family" oh my GOD and of COURSE Dean says it because he was oh my GOD

cas and gabe cas and gabe CAS AND GABe

"I think he believes it" oof

he lured them in didn't he? on purpose

1. escapism! Dean, Sam, and especially Gabriel. Like Gabriel is a very Evasive person(I feel like so is Sam) when confronted with problems, and he knows Dean at least uses TV to cope. It was a way to run away and try to get the others to understand him, I think. That whole "TV is escapism, this is the real world" and that Dean is the one that really likes it...ouch. Gabe and Sam would be cool to flesh out please Please

2. Cas and Gabe. No I have very little here, but I really like the little bits of their like "oh my god it's you fuck you" thing they have going, please give me more, it was so good. Like you get invested when they know each other and it's just...good. So good.

3. actually family in general. Like Gabriel is too scared to intervene, but doesn't want something to happen, Cas and Dean bonded over the fact that their dads are absent, Sam gets thrust into something when all he wants to do is figure out who he is outside of the context of his family. It was... a lot, and...actually compelling.

4. fucking THIS WAS FUN TOO! like fucking with color grading, actual gags, riffs on tv formulas. It felt so much like a precursor to WandaVision(the freezes, the glitches out, some amount of genre savviness, the "play along especially"(that whole thing about being trapped with a sitcom is so Important here), just...the concept and the baby TV show thing is...so fun.

5. but it's plot? I THOUGHT CHANGING CHANNELS WAS ALL FUN BUT THERE WAS PLOT! like we got Gabe's actual motivations, we got an actual reasoning, we got exposition but it was interesting cuz we were already invested in gabe's moral compass

holy shit that was good.