#i still have two days of summer left
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No i don't have an obssession, i don't know what you mean
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#digital art#fanart#anime#saiki k#beach#the disastrous life of saiki k.#saiki kusou no psi nan#saiki k fanart#saiki kuriko#aiura mikoto#frindshib bracelets#kinda#they have to be togheter#i still have two days of summer left
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So, I've got this KafHoshi fic I'm working on and it's starting to turn into a, like, 5 + 1 scenarios kinda fic in the vaguest sense of the situation. Which means I need to come up with senarios about Hoshina falling head over heels for Kafka and I listened to Super Massive Black Hole by Muse, immediately followed by Landmines by Sum 41 and all I could think about for a day was a situation where Kafka had a "Homer learns the bass" moment in his teens and his mom or cousin or something was cleaning out an old storage container and sent him his old bass guitar.
Not to overindulge, but basically my mind wouldn't let go of the image of Kafka singing SMBH, but in his Kaiju voice, which then morphed into Iharu begging on hands and knees asking if Kafka could learn the bass line to Landmines and be the bass to his lead guitar and play the song on his birthday in front of the Third Division with him.
And THEN my brain was like....
"Ok, but a Saturday morning cartoon about A rock band getting mystical guitars that transform them into humanoid Kaijus with super powers so now they fight crime just because and they have to keep the identity a secret from the police and Dollar Store Iharu leads the team and in the first episode show starts off with the band needing a new bass player so they start tryouts and a Kafka-like character shows up and the whole team isn't impressed with him until he starts playing an absolute sick riff and they let him join and DS Iharu's dad is the band's manager and he's a shit dad but he knows about he Kaiju Guitars/private hero identity thing (Cuz' he's the one networking the media to help keep it a secret) and there's a side plot about Kafka the Bass player becoming DS Iharu'd Better Dad and Reno's there too, but he's the "No enthusiasm" Guitar seller that sold them their mystic guitars and he had no idea about what the guitars do and the team rope him in once he and the rest find out KnockOff Reno had been chosen to help the people that became bestowed with the Kaiju Guitars and now KnockOff Reno is the team's Guy-In-The-Chair and HE gets his OWN character arc and him and Dollar Store Iharu start to fall in love and then you find out that Kafka had a secret love child that he didn't know about and then spend a season off screen fighting for custody and I've given this way too much thought already but doesn't it sound REALLY COOL because I could see it becoming one of those cult classic shows that were only made to sell toys, but it became one of the few that managed to transcend beyond that..."
It's never going to happen. but I do agree with myself.
#All because I wanted Kaiju mouthed Kafka to serenade Hoshina#My brain's usually like this so I'm not surprised this is in the back logs of my head now.#like this gives me either 6teen/Symbionic Titan/Motorcity animation vibes. leaning toward Motorcity.#fic is STILL not getting worked on.#but now I have more material for it.#It just sounds like the typical Made For KIds formula that inadvertently ages like fine wine#and as you become an adult and watch it again you notice the deep and complex themes that it had#and you appreciate it more because of it and it makes you miss that period of time where Kid shows didn't shy away from pulling punches.#I grew up on self imposed Avatar/Daria reruns every summer vacation does it show?#kaiju no. 8#kafka hibino#soshiro hoshina#kafhoshi#kn8#hoshikaf#kaiju no 8#The image of 1)#Iharu headbanging to Landmines#and 2)#Kafka and Iharu standing Back to Back while shredding on guitars#haven't left my mind for two days now.#Its the last song anyone thinks of that's head banging worthy#I do it every time/ worry about me if I don't
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they call me the griever because halfway through a thing I enjoy I’m already sad that it’s closer to being over
#blue chatter#trying to work on not doing this#and just enjoying the thing in the moment#this happens to me a lot with school breaks and such#like ‘oh I love being on spring break but I’m sad bc I’m already 3 days in’#‘oh I love summer vacation so far it’s too bad it’s already a month over’#and I’m like NO!!!!! blue!!!!!!!! you’re missing the point!!!!!!!!#you have the joy *right now* and you are SPOILING IT bc you’re too busy looking ahead to when it will be gone!!!!!!!!!#it happens with friend visits a lot. it’s less bad now but it still happens.#like. the first time I visited friends over spring break I woke up in the early morning of the last morning and just cried#because I only had a few hours left before I had to get on the plane home#and I start hurriedly stuffing seconds and minutes into my mouth and refusing to swallow#because maybe if I just cling extra hard then the time won’t pass-#but it does pass. and that’s okay. and I know that’s okay because life had more joyful things after that moment#had I stayed there on that day I would have been frozen as a much more miserable person#my friends themselves would have been very different people#I mean. fuck. between then and now two of us figured out our genders. both of them got married. they moved somewhere else now.#there’s a lot of little joys that got left behind there. a church they loved. a local park. mountains and windy streets.#but I wouldn’t hold ourselves there. which I try to remind myself when I start crying about lost time again#because yeah. this will end someday. human lifespans aren’t infinite.#but the future is full of life I still have to live. there’s no saying that I can’t have good things again.#and this period of my life is rapidly rushing towards a much more uncertain future and I know that and it’s scary#I know I have about 11 months to make several very adult decisions that will determine a lot of my future#but no matter what I choose this period of my life is not wasted#and I don’t need to hurriedly optimize every second and mourn losing them#and I know that. and I still feel sad and mourny. but that might be more indicative that I’m hungry or smth.
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okay I severely misjudged spaghetti guy he’s actually just really cool
#okay so I came to this flat and he wasn’t here. greeted by a very dirty flat with shit all over the kitchen counters over cling film#I meet first my other flatmate who told me he stays in his room constantly bc of previous bad flatmates#has literally just a saucepan and some salt in the kitchen. so I’m like okay spaghetti guy potentially not great but could just be#how this guy is yknow#on Tuesday I get an email back saying he’s coming back from Norway tonight looking forward to seeing you feel free to use the kitchen sauces#rlly friendly message that I wasn’t expecting. I also didn’t know he’d been on a trip i just knew he wasn’t there bc his door was open#(to a REALLY nice room. multiple rlly nice plants (which he has little care labels for!!!) and it’s tidy and pretty#and he’s got a sheep teddy on the bed)#meanwhile I am in my own head bc I don’t wanna cook in the kitchen until I can clean it and I can’t clean it without moving his shit and#I haven’t seen him yet to talk abt it and I can’t bring myself to talk to him immediately bc I’m dying#and embarrassed as hell by how I’ve been cooking in my room with a microwave and air fryer (loud) and sneaking my shit out of the kitchen#but then yesterday I DO talk to him!! and he’s super friendly!! actually interested in having a conversation and Good at it.#and then he’s cooking and like. spaghetti burns but I’m not there for long and seems to be a mistake (he made the same thing for lunch today#and did Not burn the spaghetti) and is otherwise clearly competent bc the food smells Good and despite leaving a few things out it’s like#washed up stuff isn’t dirty and the sides are better despite still under cling film. more a case that he’s spread out than he’s messy#and now today we talked and i offered to hold onto some shit over summer bc complicated situation that boils down to he’s flying back home#and he cant take all his stuff and had to choose between chucking stuff/having literally nothing this weekend. like sleeping on the sofa etc#and then cleans the whole flat?? which I’m assuming a good chunk is his mess? but he did not need to do that. could’ve easily left#bc there are two people still living here who would’ve had to deal with it and he doesn’t know either at all#and THEN tonight we talk abt food which is fun bc we both ordered stuff. and he offers me some honeydew melon bc he’s been gorging himself#these past two days to finish it before it goes bad/he leaves which is also really sweet#and JUST NOW. I take my headphones out after finishing dinner and hear the sweetest fucking guitar#he plays the gentlest like dreamy sounding acoustic guitar I’ve heard in my life in his room (door closed by the time I leave)#this is actually just a really cool dude#now that the kitchens clear I’m gonna cook tomorrow and will probably offer him some bc otherwise he’s gonna be eating out all weekend#he has extra takeout for tomorrow night but might want smth Sunday#regardless I am just. huh??? left a bit stunned bc of the u turn my opinion of this guy has taken. bc my opinion of him was a reflection#of my discomfort moving to this weird dirty basement flat with two people I didn’t know#well. idk where to go from here. I think I’ll start by talking to him more this weekend. bc holy fucking shit.#luke.txt
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hey does anyone know how we’re supposed to survive it all. asking for a friend
#she speaks#oh gang we’re really in it now#i don’t think i’ve ever felt this bad this deeply in my whole life lol#the burnout just keeps accumulating past any point i thought it could reach#and i can’t even pretend at work anymore#i’m so tired and these kids are so infuriating and it builds and builds every time they do something shitty#and i love them and it’s not their fault they’re just kids and they’re tired and it’s almost summer#but god i can’t fucking do it anymore#how exactly am i supposed to survive the next two weeks#the class i’m taking is too confusing and too fast paced#and i didn’t buy the textbook bc it’s 200 fucking dollars#and our apartment is always a mess#and i can’t keep up with friendships and feel like i’m constantly letting them down#and there’s nothing i can do to fix any of it#until the school year is over#bc at this point it takes everything i have just to get up and go to work in the mornings#but then i still have to somehow find energy to do other stuff too. and like actually teach.#i have to grade and do report cards and return materials and clean up my classroom#i need to complete a checklist the size of a novel before i leave for the summer#i need to keep the kids engaged but none of us want to be here#i need to start organizing to make next year easier#i need to fill out paperwork and spreadsheets and update my password and find time to feed myself and grade more papers and#vacuum the floors and scoop litter and clean up clutter and do dishes and wipe down counters#and i haven’t been able to fucking do any of it in months and left so many chores to my poor partner who’s also going through it#bc i have nothing left and i don’t know what to do!! i want to scream every minute of every day bc i’m so beyond overwhelmed the moment#i wake up in the morning but i don’t have time for a meltdown so i just keep going!!#i wish i had better words to explain how bad it’s gotten but the brain fog has gotten so so bad#i can barely think i can’t make decisions my memory and recall have gotten so much worse#i take my anxiety meds so often that they’ve stopped working#and yet i still worry that i’m making it up and being dramatic. anyway sorry about all this lol
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was supposed to be my day off but i got called in anyway because one of the kids from the other location was scheduled to work at ours and just. forgot to tell everyone he was going on vacation. so i went in but it wasn't a bad day because it rained and we got to stay inside for most of the day. hopefully it rains more this week
#its just driving me insane because its like living the same day over and over i needed a break. its fine it still felt like a break a little#im gonna miss my team sooo much we only have a week left after this one#ill probably end up working with one of the two coworkers this school year though. and i know some are coming back next summer which is nice#personal
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two more weeks of work,,,,,,,,
#which is really just two more days. since i only work sundays#three counting today. still have seven hrs left in my shift. fml#its fine i have the same group i had last week. i like them because theyre mostly continent<3#absolute win for both not breaking my back changing people AND for not getting covered in urine the whole day! yippee!#i do have three inconts today but they're all nice and easy so idc#theres just five weeks left in the semester and then i go home. finally. finally#applying to work at the hospital nearest my house cause i KNOW they do per diem#i dont need the flexibility during the summer but itll be nice once school starts again in august#i cannot BELIEVE im almost done w my second year of college thats so scary. i turn 20 in six months..... eugh#🫀
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https://www.tumblr.com/beatingheart-bride/715982883154755584/beatingheart-bride-theheadlessgroom
@beatingheart-bride
Despite the somewhat unsettling nature of her being able to bite through the tough shell of the crawdad (causing him to wonder briefly just how strong her teeth were, and what else she could possibly bite through), Randall didn’t let that dampen his appetite, as he took a crawdad himself, digging in to its soft, flavorful flesh beneath the shell. He smiled and gave a hum of approval, commenting, “There’s not much better than a good crawfish boil!”
It was easily one of his favorite dishes his mother made: Sure, it took a little effort, what with him and his father catching the little suckers down by the water (and trying not to get pinched in the process, which was no easy feat), but it was all worth it in the end, in his opinion, to get a plate full of flavorful crawdad, accompanied by some potatoes and corn, to feast on after a long, hard day. A small, quick lunch (usually a sandwich and little else) wasn’t super-filling, but he knew he could look forward to a good dinner, at least.
And he was happy to share with Emily, as he grabbed the small cob of corn to dig into it as well: He and Pa had gotten pretty lucky with their crawdad haul that day they caught her, luckier than they had the last couple of times they’d been out (”they’re biting today!” Wilhelm had exclaimed cheerfully, only to be caught by the critter’s little pincers, causing him to curse under his breath a little, before joking to his son, “or pinching!”), so why not share the spoils with her, he thought? There was plenty more downstairs, fortunately, so if they wanted more, they could get more (again, a nice change of pace from the last few attempts to catch some dinner).
#((she's really been through a lot in the last; what; two days?))#((she gets beaten and left to die by constance; she's then pulled out of the bayou by two humans))#((who she's unsure of what they'll do with her; they then bring her to their home and put her in a tub and tend to her))#((helping patch up her wounds; and now she's recovering; trying (along with randall) to get past the language barrier))#((and understand what this goofy human is trying to tell her; so i can see how even a small thing like a familiar plant))#((would mean a lot to her! her future no doubt seems unclear now; even though the paces have been kind to her))#((she no doubt still isn't sure of what they want; and doesn't know if she'll ever return to the bayou again))#((so a little reminder of home has to be refreshing!))#((also: what will you be seeing on broadway this summer? :Oc))#outofhatboxes#beatingheart-bride#V:Part of Your World
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the teenage depression that all the movies were talking about has finally hit and it is not poetic, I think about interacting with anyone face to face and want to cry, i have been holding back tears for the past four days, i am in an infinite loop of despair, I have been listening to therapy by all time low over and over again for an hour
#toby speaks#vent#I’m just. so fucking tired. not even like I want to go to sleep I’m just done#summer has lasted forever and we still have two months left#im not even on my period because usually I get really depressed like three days before but it’s just been. horrible#it’s been four days if it keeps this up idk what to do#I didn’t want to get up this morning I just kept saying to myself ‘get up you stupid fuck get up’ and I couldn’t#it took me 20 minutes to get out of bed#usually I’m just fine. why can’t I go back to being just fine#btw you guys should listen to the band metric they’re fantastic
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#ok so i wanted to make something for today but i've been mentally exhausted these past few days 💔💔#i pretty much forced myself to design two posters for my friends' bday and my brain doesnt work well when it's pushed(?#so i wanted to let a few days pass before trying to make something for today and last night i realized it was already the 3rd here#and since i know wouldn't be able to finish what i had in mind in a day i pretty much gave up before trying#knew*(?#also i have 3 days left of summer break and im trying to enjoy them as much as i can by doing nothing so i dont even know if ill do#something for beomgyu's bday </3#because once the semester starts i wont have much free time#ill still try to make something from time to time like i did last year but i probably wont be as active as i was#.txt#.. i think that's all i had to say#if you read it ty and ily 💗💗
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i’m suffering from too many things disease. theres too much stuff i want to do or read or watch right now but i can only do so much at once
#currently being consumed by 3 shows and physically restraining myself from starting another#well that’s a lie i did start it. i watched all of season one one weekend. but i’ve restrained myself from going further#i have like 100 episodes left in one. and maybe 40 in another? the other one is still ongoing and not on hiatus#the new show is really long though and im just staring at it#also have two shows i’ve been wanting to rewatch#and then there’s the visceral need for a cosmere reread#another series that i need to reread before i read the final book that’s coming out in like a week#plus a series im halfway through that i got burnt out of but have been thinking about recently#to be fair i was reading a book a day and they’re like 600/700 pages#and then there’s the projects. god the projects. so many projects#and i can’t forget about my need to speedrun my class which takes up more of my thoughts than i’d like to admit#anyway yeah i’m suffering#but in a good way. kinda.#i read 200k words today. that was my version of being productive#and then finished some seasons i was halfway through#and brainstormed and started my tragedy piece#i’ll probably finish it later tonight and edit tomorrow#also definitely need to do my annual hobbit/lotr rewatch soon. i reread it this summer but i normally watch the movies in december
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remember being a teen and watching shit like soul eater and kimono jihen and thinking god damn i wish I had a perpetually exhausted but badass mentor to help me get through things?
well now im 27 and im the perpetually exhausted mentor with bedhead and a slight alcohol problem to my 15 year old cousin and im gonna tear my hair out about not being able to just let her stay for a bit because i know it doesnt matter fuck all what i say to her dad, shes still gonna be treated like shit just because shes a moody teen with undiagnosed add and an autustic brother who constantly talks over everyone. i suddenly need a cigarette.
#like he was going on about shes doing bad in school because she sleeps late and all she needs to do#is got to bed early!!! reset her internal clock!!#BRO IM LITERALLY RIGHT HERE AT 27 STILL ONLY FALLING ASLEEP AT 5AM AND WAKING AT NOON BEVAUSE THATS NOT A THING YOU CAN CONTROL#ESPECIALLY WITH ADD/ADHD.#IM LITERALLY DIAGNOSED I CAN TELL YOU YOURE WRONG AND I CAN EVEN SOURCE THE ARTICLES THAT EXPLAIN WHY#FUCKING ARE YOU KIDDING ME#im still mad cause i sat with with poor kid while she tried to keep from bawling her eyes out because she made a snarky comment#about her brother talking about his coin collecting (and to be clean its not jus tthat he cant understand social cues he just literally#never stops making noise. we all know he cant control it but we also all know its because his parents denied he was autistic until he was 21#despite the fact he stopped maturing at 11. we love him.to death but oh my god i cant handle it for two visits a year#Of course his sibling feel like they live in an insane asylum)#like yeah it was a rude comment but fuck can you blame her?????? when shes silenced because he talks over everyone then gets awkward#because she has no idea what to say when she DOES get the chance to speak of course shes going to resent him#ALSO NOT TO MENTIONT HE FACT SHES CHINESE AND WERE ARE ALL VERY VERY WHITE#SHES GOT OTHER SHIT SHE SHOULD BE IN THERAPY FOR#DO NOT MAKE IT MORE COMPLICATED FOR HER BY BRINGING ACTUAL SYMPTOMS AND HER SCHOOLING INTO THIS#My god i hate academics like the world does not end because you failed a math class. i dropped out at 16 and all the useful skills i have#i gained after the world opened up when i left and i wasnt being told no thats not on a standardized test you cant do that#im much fucking happier and frankly intelligent than the rest of my family thats wasted time on universities#and like being happy is what matter#why would you wsnt her to be “sucessful” if she isnt also happy#like if school fucking sucks for her then why send her to a rich white private school and fucking SUMMER SCHOOL#imo thats just abuse#like the graded education system is inherently abusive anyway but its worse when its pushed on her like that#i need to move so we have room out east for her to come stay and maybe do some classes free of them#but i dont work and cant drive so i cant help her#hell i can barely take care of myself#but im just so fucking mad on her behalf and she doesnt deserve to feel this way#its happened twice in the three days shes been here#just they all need therapy but they need to fucking listen to her ans i know she wont even feel okay speaking up
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I cannot win today
#meows#went to my PD today and it was an hour earlier#than the others have been and I get there on time#with some time early bc the directions didn’t say#where to go for the presentation#and there’s no one greeting people as they come in#to direct them at all. so I was going everywhere#after already parking too far out bc I thought I parked#correctly. finally find it and they start /30 min later/#I was so tired I couldn’t concentrate#then ig they didn’t plan anything for English#so me and the other English teachers from my school#drove to our school and worked together for a couple of#hours. I go to my classroom intent on dropping#my laptop off and getting lunch to go#I walk in and realize the couch that had been left aaaalll summer#was gone. apparently the lady before me promised it to the#suspension room. but again it had been here all summer#no note no nothing. like I went out and bought a rug#and pillows and for the first time since accepting#this job felt a little better. like I could finally have#alternative seating. just to have it ripped from beneath me#so that pissed me off so I left bc I didn’t technically hafta stay#ate lunch almost at 1:30 pm and knew the shower guy#was likely still over and I didn’t want to be around#all the noise so I went to the smaller closer mall to me#and went to their small hot topic and found some#blind boxes for Halloween I had been eyeing#only to get the only two I didn’t want#Chili’s got my dinner wrong and was out of Dr Pepper. what a great day
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imagine a two or three years before the marriage with arranged!gojo, when you’re in your late teens and the gojo family invited some of the noble families to their summer estate near the ocean to relax there for a while.
obviously you and your family were invited (despite how much it angered your fathers wife that you too were included in the invitation), so you, along with four other prominent families, made your ways up north for the summer.
you were excited to be away for a while, even more excited that you were going to have an actual room and access to more things. you knew the kids there weren’t going to hang around you, so you tried making yourself comfortable in some of the more secluded places of the gojo estate.
it's one reason why gojo didn't really remember you a whole lot when you two were first married. sure, he knew he knew you from your family and all of those gatherings, but you were usually always in the background.
the north was truly beautiful in the summer, especially by the sea, so you couldn’t be too butthurt over their rejection when you had such views to remedy your pain.
most days you’d hide away in a corner of the library or walk around the grounds, steering clear of your sisters and all the other kids your age. you could hear their faint laughter near the lake or the way they stayed up all night around a fire near the gardens.
one of the nights when you were out on the beach, watching the waves as you read a book, you heard a hoard of voices getting closer and closer to you.
your head whipped around in confusion, heart sinking when you realized the other kids were coming here too. you could’ve sworn they said they were going to be out at town till midnight.
you quickly packed up all your things, ditching your little blanket as you scurried up the hill, trying to stay hidden in the line of trees as you watched them come nearer.
you could see your sisters laughing as some of the other girls and guys stumbled out on the sand, their heads thrown back in laughter as they all started to strip out of their usual garments and into the swim ones they had underneath.
you were about to leave when you heard somebody ask loudly about your blanket, wondering if it was any of theirs.
while still staying hidden you saw how the tallest one of the group, gojo, picked it up, surveying it and then the foot tracks in the sand that led away from it.
his eyes looks up the hill, into the trees, and to your horror, watched as he decided to follow it.
he told the rest of his group to stay there and start swimming without him, he’d just been looking for a little bit and coming back.
you had heard of his excellent tracking skills, how he’d lead the north to a steady victory when up against some other neighboring lands, which unfortunately meant he was freakishly good at tracking a girl who was awful at hiding.
you stopped breathing, crouching behind a bush as you watched him enter the forest.
he looked around, blue eyes on the ground as they looked for the footsteps, taking note of the deserted basket of cheeses and the book you had taken with yourself.
before you knew it he was near your bush, looking through they leaves when he caught your frantic eyes.
gojo stands up, confusion laced on his face as he towers over your still kneeling body.
“what...what are you doing here?” he asks bluntly, his voice cold.
you grimace, standing up as well as you scratch the back of your neck.
“well, i was reading over there,” you point out behind his back to the shore, where all the other kids had swarmed into the water, “i thought you all had left to go to the town.”
gojo’s eyes rake over you. the two of you had barely spoke a word to each other since your arrival, and this was the first time he’s really taken a good look at you.
his focused on the downward turn of your eyes, his you evaded his look. he skimmed over the slope of your nose, the slight press of your lips. there was a sort of sad look about you that he's always noticed when staring at you.
his arms cross over his chest, white brows furrowed. you felt heat rise to your cheeks, feeling meek under his heavy stare.
“we came here instead,” gojo simply says, his tone clipped.
you nod, your lips pulling into an awkward smile as you bend down to pick up your book, flicking off some of the dirt on its cover with your hands.
“i’ll head back” you murmur, picking up your basket, noticing your blanket that was still in his hands.
you decide not to care, you’ll just find another one.
“alone?” he asks incredulously, voice slightly raised as you give him a skeptical look.
this is the first time the two of you had really acknowledged each other, aside from the polite head nods and the two-word sentences. why was he questioning you so much?
"that was the plan," you tell him, your eyes squinting a little bit in confusion.
gojo knows the grounds like the back of his hand. he and his family have been coming here ever since he was a young boy. the estate is close to the shore, yes, but it's getting dark and you've only been here once. he almost wants to applaud your confidence.
"i'll go tell one of your sisters so they can accompany you back. they know the way better." he finally says, looking like he is about to turn to leave, but you scramble, tugging him back by the fabric of his loose tunic.
he looks at you in shock.
"no!" you almost hiss, a pleading look on your face, "i know the way back. don't tell them," you put your hands up as if you were surrendering, packing up all your things in a hurry as you shoot him a hasty smile, "just pretend i was never here."
gojo's apprehension isn't warded off. if anything, he's even more confused by your frenzied state.
you're finding the trail to the estate, leaving him as you keep poking around, not noticing the way he was still following you.
"your sisters wouldn't mind," he tells you, and you look over your shoulder with a raised brow.
"maybe if it was you who was asking to be led back," you say with a scoff, shoving some stray twigs and leaves from nearby trees out the way, "but they'd rather haul a sheep carcass than accompany me."
gojo blinks slowly.
when he doesn't say anything, you shoot him another confused look. what was he not getting?
"you do realize who i am...right?"
gojo rolls his eyes, pursing his lips together.
"yes...but," he kicks some pebbles away, "they don't care about...that, right?" he's hesitant to acknowledge the truth. the fact that you're only related to them by father. the reason why they don't even speak about your mother is because she's probably in a brothel somewhere far away.
you give it a second to sink in before you laugh, your head tilting back as your arms fall helplessly to the sides. gods he was daft.
"that's all my family cares about," you tell him, your voice dripping with something else, a buried emotion that you've been hauling around for years, "i think they'd rather me be eaten by a bear on my way back," you admit with a smile, but he doesn't reciprocate it. he doesn't really seem to be one for jokes.
gojo's arms cross over his chest, thinking. this entire time he just thought you liked being by yourself. were you alone because you had to be? is that why you've been avoiding the group?
before he can say something the shouts from the other kids reel you back to looking at the shore. they're calling for him to come back, asking what's taking him so long.
he looks back at you, conflicted.
"the water's nice," you say, your voice a little quieter as you give him a small smile, pushing him to leave.
he rakes his fingers through his white hair, staring at you longer.
that smile, he thinks, is the most melancholic thing he's ever seen
"there aren't any bears here," he says, as if that would do anything to help.
but your smile turns into something easier, a laugh, a genuine one, falling from your lips. gojo decides he likes that sound. better than all the other laughs he's heard.
"i'll trust you on that," you say, ducking your head down in a final nod as you turn around a final time and disappear behind the shrubbery.
gojo stands there for another minute, thinking.
and then he heads back to the beach, where all the other kids have already gone into the water. he goes to take off his tunic before he realizes he's still holding your blanket, the fabric searing into his skin.
he brings it closer to his face, his nose scrunching at a distinct smell, a small smile forming on his face when he can still remember the lingering smell on you too from when you were speaking to him.
lavender.
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the benefit of someone treating you like shit is that it can push you to realize what you really want out of life. i think we're here to experience so many people and places and things and more than anything, joy. i don't think we exist here on this giant earth to curl up in one not-too-horrible corner with not-too-horrible people and live our lives exactly how we think they want us to so that we can stay 'secure'. at least i'm not
#<- readers added context: charmtale is insane and this post was inspired by a girl who most certainly does not even remember she exists atp#No but FR. ever since last summer (aka: meeting said girl and having a terrible two-month mildly homoerotic friendship* that ended awfully)#i care less and less about losing people by the day... i don't derive much happiness from feeling loved by other people anymore#if they do thats fine but whatever... i tried so hard to be what i thought she wanted me to be and it still wasn't enough she still left me#and now i'm like who fucken cares if people want me. i have way less of a sense of self at all i am just here to observe the world and see#interesting and fun things and have a good time and explore. and be stupid. i used to spend so much time basically begging for ppl to love#me so this is a huge shift. a shift that has been slowly occurring over the past months not just an intense emotional 'WELL I DONT NEED YOU#so i think its permanent. i hope at least. i'll update#*yes this can still happen to you in your 20s with other women in their 20s. Please drive safe. its a dangerous world .
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copycat | oscar piastri social media au
pairing: oscar piastri x fem reader
they say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, but really it's just annoying
MASTERLIST | TIP JAR
note: sorry to all of the chloes of the world, i just chose a random name!
f1tea
liked by user1, user2 and 27,305 others
tagged: yourusername, chloereed
f1tea: SHE STRIKES AGAIN! y/n y/ln, oscar piastri's girlfriend, recently changed up her style with some bangs and surprise, surprise chloe reed shared her updated look just days later. then to really pour salt in the wound, reed posted yet again in mclaren merch. will she ever give up?
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user3: BRO YOU COULDN'T HAVE WAITED AT LEAST A WEEK?
user4: i think all subtlety was lost when she copied a literal TATTOO
user5: the way it's y/n's tattoo dedicated to oscar as well...
user6: at what point do we get a restraining order?
user7: the day that girl ends up in the paddock we should let y/n fight her with no consequences
user8: this has been going on for so long i feel like y/n has a lot to unleash on her
user9: at this point i think all of us y/n fans should be able to get their lick in
user10: i'm new to f1 can someone explain this lore to me? (srs)
user11: y/n and oscar have been together for nearly four years now, they got together when they were like 19. this chloe reed girl went on one date with oscar when they were 17 and now copies everything y/n does to try and get his attention? like down to haircut and tattoos ... it's kinda crazy and y/n has made some references to it but like we're nearing like the third year of this so i think she might snap soon
user12: it's even got to the point where chloe has like started talking with y/n's accent? she has a very obvious accent so like it's INSANE
user13: and to think all of this over a single date SIX YEARS AGO
user14: on a brighter note - y/n was MADE for bangs they look so fucking good
user15: obviously she should stop but if there's anyone you want to look like, it would be y/n
user16: at this point is it even over oscar anymore? or has chloe lost herself to journey to BECOME y/n
user17: the fact that she still camps out under all of oscar's posts and constantly posts in mclaren merch
user18: and don't even get me started with how she's always in the comments of oscar's sisters' comments
user19: someone needs to get nicole to put this girl on blast
user20: remember before elon took away public likes that mark went on a liking spree about chloe being a lil weirdo
yourusername
liked by danielricciardo, logansargeant and 1,209,566 others
tagged: oscarpiastri, landonorris & maxfewtrell
yourusername: summer breakin' with my boy (and his boy)
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user24: MAMA THERE'S A BITCH TRYNA BE JUST LIKE YOU 💜
user25: i unfortunately think she's very aware of it
oscarpiastri: i know you love me because you didn't get annoyed about THEM gatecrashing our couples getaway
landonorris: what if we are a couple HUH???
oscarpiastri: max literally has a girlfriend?
landonorris: ur so close-minded osc
yourusername: i love you osc even with these little stray cats you've picked up
landonorris: did we or did we not organise a super romantic dinner for you?
oscarpiastri: i organised a dinner and you two are so fussy that you left to find some chicken nuggets?
landonorris: therefore giving you a romantic evening on the water?
yourusername: you fell in the water trying to get back on board from the tender and i had to jump in and save you after a fish touched your foot and you began to have a panic attack
landonorris: god you do something nice for people and all you get is SHAMED
mclarenf1: you nearly drowned ???
user26: is chloe going to attempt to drown someone so she can claim she also saved an f1 driver
user27: @georgerussell63 alert the GDPA - NO WATER !!!
georgerussell63: understood ����
user28: has it not gotten to a crazy point now that we're warning drivers that this crazy girl might DROWN them ???
user29: at what point do we put oscar and y/n is witness protection
user30: the day she manages to get in the paddock me thinks
charles_leclerc: i see our invite got lost in the mail?
yourusername: please refer to whatever the fuck was going above your comment
charles_leclerc: that you're a victim of identity theft?
yourusername: we been known, but BEFORE THAT
charles_leclerc: oh. you should've let lando drown
landonorris: ???
oscarpiastri: i think that might have gotten me fired?
yourusername: no more papaya rules?
chloereed
liked by user31, user32 and 11,045 others
chloereed: summer breakin'
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user33: oh brother this guy STINKS
user34: i am feeling sufficiently creeped out on the behalf of y/n and oscar
user35: i really don't understand her game here though? does she expect oscar to see this and actually mistake her for y/n and leave y/n for her?
user36: at this point i think she's lost in the sauce
user37: also oscar is hilariously down bad for y/n like he could probably recognise her via vibrational field he would not fall for this cheap imitation
logansargeant: this ain't it btw (it's never been it)
user38: not logan tapping in
logansargeant: who gon check me boo? i ain't got a job
chloereed: i don't know what you're trying to say, but i don't appreciate you spreading misinformation and hate
logansargeant: you have literally copied everything about my best friend down to her sentimental tattoos and you've essentially stalked my other bestfriend for nearly seven years ?
chloereed: it's not stalking if i know i'm what he really wants? she's the imitation of me
logansargeant: you like need help
user39: GO LOGAN
user40: bro has been let of the leash
user41: tbf when you think about it, logan has been friends with oscar for years and by default friends with y/n for just as long so like he's probably seen how this has effected them personally
user42: i don't really see how this is such a big deal, people try and imitate celebs all the time ?
user43: i think it's because she knows at least one of them personally and is very viciously pursuing oscar
user44: also there has to be an aspect we don't know because i don't think logan would be publicly taking her on in the comments if it weren't a lot worse
user45: also ... like it probably feels like shit as a person generally to have everything you do copied and not even get a tiny bit of credit
f1
liked by danielricciardo, patooward and 1,784,039 others
tagged: charles_leclerc, maxverstappen1 & oscarpiastri
f1: we're ready for you monza
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user46: OMG IS THAT?
user47: i'm being so for real y/n needs to fight her
user48: OSCAR RUNNNNNNNNN
landonorris: do i need to inform the legal department?
yourusername: you might want to give them some sort of heads up
chloereed: why you afraid i'll steal back my man?
yourusername: no i'm afraid i'll get hit with a manslaughter charge
chloereed: that's a threat - my lawyers will be hearing
yourusername: tell them bitch, oscar would still choose conjugal visits with me over ever being with you
user49: came for the fast cars, staying for whatever this drama is omg
user50: i once went on a reddit deep dive about this drama where they compiled all the evidence and holy moly this confrontation has been a long time coming
user51: the best (or maybe worse) thing abotu all of this is that her claim of being with oscar first and dating him when they were 17 is based on one 'date' where is was just a joint ball between their schools where there was a compulsory dance in which they were partners
maxverstappen1: yo this shit is insane
user52: aren't you meant to be in the car in 20 minutes?
maxverstappen1: drama waits for no one @yourusername i got ur back
charles_leclerc: at this point i will mobilise the tifosi @yourusername
yourusername: i can handle her, i might just need some money to fix my nails
oscarpiastri: please do not fight her, she's not worth it
chloereed: she won't fight for your love but i will
oscarpiastri: can you just fuck off
user53: i fear she's pushed them over the edge now lol
user54: i'm glad they're both letting her have it in the PUBLIC INSTAGRAM COMMENTS <3
f1tea
liked by user55, user56 and 34,982 others
f1tea: she's finally done it? chloe reed was spotted in the paddock at monza. will we finally see a confrontation between the two girls?
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user55: i FUCKING hope so
user56: if i were y/n you'd have to hold me back i'm being so serious
user57: i'd be in oscar's mclaren so fast and be driving down the pit lane to look for her
user58: i'd already be in an italian prison sorry not sorry
user59: y/n needs to give me lessons on being this graceful
user60: at this point we should just have an undercard for the race that's these girls tussling it out
user61: at this point i think logan, charles and max are ready to jump in
user62: charles and max being in the comments just before FP getting the scoop is so insane i love them
user63: imagine getting these f1 drivers this pressed over an aesthetic
user64: if you think this is just about an aesthetic you're just being dumb on purpose
user65: but like y/n is just a girl with bangs and a basic look, u could say like half of the female population are copying y/n
user66: but like please look at the actual evidence, it's way deeper than bangs babe
user67: also the TATTOO WHY ARE WE NOT TALKING ABOUT THE TATTOO
user68: whatever happens y/n will always be better than me
user69: she needs to bash her publicly if she won't beat her physically lol
oscarpiastri
liked by charles_leclerc, yourusername and 3,984,022 others
tagged: yourusername
oscarpiastri: please leave us alone, you'll never be her and i don't want you to be
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user71: STUNT ON THEM QUEEN
user72: a man who vocally defends you >>>
yourusername: love you bby
oscarpiastri: if anyone wants to take me away from you they'll have to defeat me in combat
yourusername: not saying i want that but you would be so sexy in full armour
oscarpiastri: for you... i would wear anything :3
user73: bro said his piece and immediately went back to simping like a pro
user74: if he doesn't offer to wear a suit of armour in the bedroom is he really in love with you?
user75: i guess we're not getting any dad!oscar content any time soon
landonorris: ???
user75: it's a joke about protected sex genius
landonorris: OH
chloereed: that's not what you said then oscar
oscarpiastri: THAT WAS SIX YEARS AGO IN A CONVERSATION I WAS OBLIGATED TO HAVE GET A GRIP WOMAN
oscarpiastri: YOU WILL NEVER FEEL SATISFACTION IN YOUR LIFE IF YOU CONTINUE TO COPY EVERYTHING SHE DOES AND REFUSE TO BE YOUR OWN PERSON
oscarpiastri: so PLEASE FOR YOUR OWN SAKE GET YOUR OWN LIFE AND LEAVE US ALONE
oscarpiastri: oh. i'm blocked
oscarpiastri: slay
user76: so ... oscar... when can we get this level of reading on the radio
yourusername: don't make him do community service :(
user77: but him being sassy is a service to the community
yourusername: you make a good point
yourusername
liked by maxverstappen1, charles_leclerc and 2,045,677 others
tagged: oscarpiastri
yourusername: you can be a copy cat all you like, but you'll never beat the original
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user78: i am sorry i exist at the same time as you
user79: i know this a whole love post but i have a confession, i am IN LOVE WITH YOU GET RID OF THE AUSSIE
oscarpiastri: 🤨
charles_leclerc: this was a whole saga, i'm happy it's all worked out for you guys but this was hella entertaining - when can we do it again?
yourusername: never again hopefully
charles_leclerc: boring!
yourusername: it literally got to the point that you offered to leave your car keys in a 'special spot'
charles_leclerc: well obviously i don't mean to THAT extent but i just want a bit of drama, let a girl live
user80: shit stirrer charles leclerc i love you
user81: we should've known he was in the trenches with this, the inchident knows no bounds
oscarpiastri: i love you and i'm sorry this happened. but you do slay so i could see why people would want to be you
yourusername: i knew me with bangs would be too powerful 😔
oscarpiastri: you're the most beautiful girl in the world no matter what
yourusername: ugh you have me blushing pretty boy
landonorris: cringe
yourusername: maybe if you copied oscar's flirting techniques you'd actually be wifed
landonorris: i thought we just established that copying is bad
yourusername: trust me, you need the help
user82: i'm glad we've returned to peace with the lando slander
user83: they're power is insane
maxverstappen1: can i say helping you come up with this caption is my community service
yourusername: fuck yes
maxverstappen1: stunting on hoes is very much in the public interest
fin.
note: i'm back in a rhythm !! this is not so subtle so i'll expand here: please please please do not steal my work, idc if you change the driver, if you're blatantly stealing my ideas and concepts - to the point that people are messaging me to make me aware, please don't! or at least credit me rather than pretending this a completely original thought. mamma mia didn't bother me as much because it's obviously the musical's idea, but omg undercover verstappen? big reputation? and guilty as sin - down to the series name? i haven't made any posts about this but know it's very much bothering me and if i see anymore i may have to put it on blast. thank you all for reading, soz for the rant but this has been going on for months.
#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#f1 instagram au#f1 x you#f1#f1 social media au#oscar piastri instagram au#oscar piastri fanfic#oscar piastri x you#oscar piastri#oscar piastri imagine#oscar piastri social media au
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