#i spend so much time yesterday cleaning my tv and everything around it and now i was going to sit down on my sofa and enjoy watching my

[frankensteinmutual]

I am going to fucking explode

[thetransomen]

Fuck fuck mother mother fuck fuck

i can't right now.

My mom's in and out of the hospital like once a week, and we barely talk. She just lays in bed all day and complains about everything. Like not to be insensitive to those with chronic illnesses, but she's *always* been like this. Even when she was healthy, she just lays in bed all day. Watches TV. And then wonders why *I*'m the one depressed. Why do *I* have so much anxiety.

She fucking screams at me if i open the blinds, bc she wants to walk around half-naked all the time (the bottom half. yeah i don't like it either). She does the absolute bare minimum of household chores, and she doesn't even make an effort to clean things up if she spills. It's like she has absolutely no self-esteem at all and never has. I can't even remember a time when she was really happy. Maybe when I was a kid, going on a vacation. The one vacation I ever remember having with her.

I just don't get her. She works all the time and takes the lowest-paying jobs, doesn't really try to improve herself. Like is this what she really thinks of herself? And how am I, her child supposed to care for her when I can barely care for myself? I have issues with money quite often and wish I made enough to move out. I have no hope of moving anywhere by myself anytime soon.

But now I'm getting desperate, because I can't care for her myself. I think she needs to move in with one of my aunts or grandma where she can actually get 24/7 help (my grandma lives with my uncle who helps her). I feel like I'm failing her, but I also think she got here by herself. She's ignored her own depression and anxiety and projected it all on me. I'd actually be a lot emotionally healthier if I didn't live with her. Especially if she hadn't been the one to "raise" me (i wasn't really raised by anyone. Maybe my grandparents and aunts and uncles. I spent far more time around them than my mom - she was always working. I never got why she never stopped working. Even working 3 jobs at once! I just wanted her to spend time with me. Instead, I spent most of my childhood alone at home. Making things up in my head. Letting my mind wander.... Kind of explains why I focus on writing as a creative pursuit, rather than performing in some way.)

I'm also at a point in my life where I'm starting to consider porn and related activities to make money. Not because I'm desperate. But rather, my libido tends to skyrocket on T, and I need lots of stimulation to get off. And it turns out, people like what I look like. I got 50+ men in my city interested with just one post.

And if I do decide to pursue that, I don't want to be anywhere near my mom when I do. She'd never find me anyway. I don't think she cares at all for porn. I just want to keep her safe and protected and never again have to work so much in her life. Like I want her to retire yesterday. She shouldn't have to work that much. NO ONE should have to work that much. Give her a fucking break. And give me a fucking break. We all need a fucking break.

You know all this would be instantly fixed if we had Unversal Basic Income? Or guaranteed housing? I think about this a lot. My situation would massively improve if that were true.

Now my aunt's trying to shame me to go to the hospital to see her. When she told me to stay home and clean. Because those are my mom's priorities. Doesn't care about herself, as long as the work gets done. Then she sits there in misery and practically enjoys feeling sorry for herself. She's done this her whole life, and it's taken me years to realize this is narcissistic behavior. Because I've noticed it in myself.

When you start to feel sorry for yourself, you actually get a huge ego. *Because* you feel worthless. Narcissistic Personality Disorder means you have extremely low self-esteem. And for me, it only got better when I realized I'm not perfect and never will be. And no one and nothing is. I accepted that I'm the same as anyone else, and I need to trust myself deeply - that's what faith is. That's where my faith in humanity lies - within myself. And with others, when I improve their day just by existing. Making eye contact. Smiling. I know I'm not worthless. I'll never be perfect. And no one else will be.

Because NPD means you feel sorry for yourself, you feel like you're supposed to be perfect. You become more concerned with being right than being kind, and that's your first mistake. Then you start to expect that of others. And well, look at society. It starts a cascading effect. To say that we don't understand depression is a bunch of BS. I mean, sure there are some people for whom it truly is inexplicable, but more often than not, it's because of some ridiculous expectation you're setting for yourself and everyone else. You get this black-and-white thinking (oh hi politics, is that you?) and you start to demonize certain people and things. And generally, you stop thinking of yourself as human, which is why you end up treating people so.

I've already written so much here, but it's safe to say I've been thinking about this a lot lately. Why I feel suffocated in my own home, why I get random bouts of anxiety. It's not coming from within. It's coming from everyone around me.

I really really think mental disorders are more social disorders than anything. But instead of a lack of communication between individuals, it's rather a lack of communication within the self. It's an introspective disorder. Maybe that's what we should re-name "abnormal psych". Because there's really nothing abnormal about it, when we're living in the abnormal society.

[thewidowsghost]

Shy (Wanda Maximoff x Stark!Fem!Reader)

Anon asked:

May I request you writing a fic where Wanda Maximoff trains a new shy avenger who doesn’t laugh a lot and Wanda accidentally finds out that the reader is EXTREMELY ticklish and she thinks it’s very funny and she pins him/her down and tickles the reader to get him/her to laugh and open up to her?

This was so much fun to write!

Thanks to all of you guys who've recently sent in requests!

(Y/n) Stark had to be the shiest person any of the Avengers had ever met, and that hadn't changed when the young woman had joined the Avengers.

Now, the youngest Stark is nothing like her father. Where Tony was loud and obnoxious, (Y/n) is shy and not once had anyone, not even her mother, Pepper, nor her father had once heard (Y/n) laugh.

The young Avenger had only smiled in the presence of someone that wasn't her parents added up to a grand total of three times, and they had all been directed by her godmother Natasha. Once was because Natasha had gotten (Y/n) the exact gift she'd wanted without telling the former assassin. The second has been when (Y/n) was five and she'd left her favorite bear at her parent's house, and Natasha had taken (Y/n) to Build-A-Bear to make a new bear. The third had been the time when (Y/n) was sick - Tony and Pepper were at work like always - and Natasha is tasked with caring for the youngest Stark; Natasha had snuggled with her goddaughter, bring forth the third and last smile Natasha had seen from the girl, a grateful, loving smile that had Natasha cuddling (Y/n) closer.

Then Wanda Maximoff had entered the picture.

At first, (Y/n) had treated the newest Avenger with the same attitude as the other, but after a month or so, (Y/n) had warmed up to the witch.

The two young women are having their twice-a-week movie night when Wanda brushes (Y/n)'s side with a hand as she reaches for the bowl of popcorn.

"I'm sorry!" Wanda says hastily but smiles slightly when she catches (Y/n)'s lips quirks into the slightest smile and she hears the soft giggle escape them. "Oh, the quietest Avenger is ticklish?" Wanda teases, wiggling her fingers playfully.

"No, no I'm not," (Y/n) protests, her slight smile still betraying her.

Wanda grins, tackles (Y/n), and digs her fingers into (Y/n)'s ribs.

"W-wan-nda-a!" (Y/n) laughs, unable to stop herself. "S-st-to-op!" she exclaims, still laughs hysterically.

The door to (Y/n)'s room slams open and five Avengers and a mother are framed in the doorway, staring dumbfounded at the scene in front of them: Wanda straddling (Y/n)'s waist, fingers still dug into (Y/n)'s ribs, and, possibly the strangest part of the situation is the fact that (Y/n) is still laughing.

"I thought someone had died," Pepper says softly.

"This might be stranger though," Tony continues, just as soft as his wife, the six backing out of the room, silently closing the door behind them.

Wanda, still grinning, settles back down on the bed beside (Y/n), and (Y/n) sits up, her cheeks still red.

"Do I win a prize?" Wanda asks teasingly.

"What would you like?" (Y/n) asks, a soft smile creeping onto her face.

"Why do you never smile or laugh?" Wanda asks, turning to study (Y/n) closely.

(Y/n) silently considers the question, a thoughtful expression crossing her face. Then she speaks, "I guess it's because my parents were always at work when I was younger, and I was always left with Nat. Don't get me wrong, I love Natasha, but sometimes I just want to spend time with them. They were just always gone."

Wanda replies curiously, "Why didn't you just tell them?"

"I'm shy, I guess that played a part in it," (Y/n) pauses. "But I guess it's also the fact that I didn't want to disappoint them."

"(Y/n), you're not disappointing anyone, not now, not ever," Wanda says fiercely. "They want what's best for you - making sure you have everything you could ever want."

"Wanda, I-I," (Y/n) falters, notice the emotion behind the witch's words. "Thank you," (Y/n) finally settles with, turning back towards the TV.

(Y/n) leans against Wanda slightly, the popcorn bowl resting in (Y/n)'s lap. The youngest Stark is feeling a lot better with all that she'd told Wanda off her chest.

The next morning, (Y/n) wakes up, determined to make today a good day.

(Y/n) is the first one downstairs, and she's the one who makes breakfast - waffles, pancakes, sausage, bacon, and sliced fruit.

(Y/n) greets Natasha with a warm hug and a stack of waffles with sliced strawberries on top, and the former assassin smiles, (Y/n) returns the smile shyly.

(Y/n) greets the remainder of the Avengers with shy, nervous smiles, and their choice of breakfast.

The atmosphere is a lot more relaxed this morning, (Y/n) thinks as she sits down beside Wanda, and when the witch smiles warmly, (Y/n) returns it.

Wanda is helping (Y/n) clean up the breakfast dishes, the other Avengers having moved into the training room when Wanda turns to ask (Y/n) a question. "(Y/n)?" (Y/n) turns to meet Wanda's gaze. "Would you want to, maybe, only if you want to," Wanda falters as if she's nervous, and (Y/n) smiles reassuringly at the witch. "Would you like to go out with me? It's okay if you don't want to," Wanda asks hastily. "It's up -"

"Wanda!" (Y/n) interupts. "Wanda, I'd love to go out with you."

"Wait, really?" Wanda asks, her eyes wide with disbelief.

"Wanda, you helped bring out a side of myself that even I've never seen before, that was all you," (Y/n) says. "Talking about the thing we talked out yesterday, or," (Y/n) cracks the slightest smiles, "what you forced out of me yesterday, made me realize that, despite what I thought, my parents to want me around."

"I'll pick you up in the lobby at 5'o'clock?" Wanda asks and (Y/n) nods.

"See you soon," (Y/n) says, placing a soft kiss on Wanda's cheek.

At 5'o'clock, (Y/n) and Wanda meet in the lobby of the Compound.

"You look really nice," Wanda tells (Y/n), and the young Stark flushes. (Y/n) is wearing a pair of dark jeans, a mint green t-shirt, a dark green leather jacket that must've belonged to Natasha, and a pair of black tennis shoes.

"I-I, wow," is (Y/n)'s response as she gazes at Wanda. The witch is wearing a black dress with a red leather jacket, and a pair of black, knee-high leather boots.

Wanda chuckles taking (Y/n)'s hand gently in her own before she leads the Stark out to a waiting car - a familiar black Corvette Stingray.

Wanda opens one of the back doors and (Y/n) slides into the car.

"Hello, Miss Stark, Miss Maximoff," says Natasha Romanoff, who Wanda had recruited - not that it took a lot of convincing - to be their chauffeur for the night.

"Oh, hi Nattie," (Y/n) greets her godmother.

Natasha smiles at the girl before she starts the car, driving to their destination.

"This is beautiful," (Y/n murmurs, gazing at all the light strung through the gazebo. "And how'd you figure out all my favorite foods - paprikash, roasted potatoes; beef stroganoff," albeit an interesting assortment of food. "Nattie used to make me a ton of eastern European and Russian dishes when I was younger. You use your powers?"

"I like to ask permission when I use them. I took a guess, and well, Nat helped me a little," Wanda admits. "I also went with a few of my own favorites."

(Y/n)'s phone dings partway through the dinner, and (Y/n) glances apologetically at Wanda before she glances down at the phone beside her plate at the table.

"It's Nattie," (Y/n) says.

Nattie: How's it going 😀 ❤️ Having fun?

Me: Haha ❤️ You've been in on this all day and you haven't told me 🥺 ❤️

(Y/n) glances over to the car and smiles at her godmother, who smiles lovingly in return.

A sleepy (Y/n) rests against Wanda on the quiet ride back to the Compound; Wanda smiles, her green eyes sparkling.

Wanda sends Natasha a grateful smile and walks (Y/n) up to her room.

"I had a really nice time," (Y/n) says with a sleepy smile. "Can we do something tomorrow? Maybe see a movie?"

"I'd love to," Wanda beams.

Word Count: 1323 words

Taglist:

@theofficialzivadavid

@mariawilson24

@procrastinatingsapphictrash

@marsromanoff

@rail-me-romanoff

@okiedokie4

@fayhar

@acertainredhead

@capsicle118

[inupibaldspot]

Our Snowfall

Pairing: Baji x Reader

Request: OPEN

Note: I cried writing this I’m in so much pain rn 😭

Baji slowly opened the door,revealing room of white color, with faint sent of medicines and anti-septic's.

Earlier he was playing catch with Mikey outside, but Mikey wanting to show off threw the ball too hard making the ball zoom across the sky as it breaks the window to a hospital room.

Baji was about to shout at Mikey only to find the blonde boy had disappeared without a trace. And now Baji was on a mission to get his ball back.

“I’m sorry for breaking your window.” Baji bows his head from the door.

“Don’t worry about it.”

Baji blinked in confusion. The voice was that of a young child and not an adult like he was expecting. He raises his head to see a small figure ,who looked really weak.

The person smiled. “The ball is on the table there. It would be best if you left before nurse comes back.”

Baji nods as he walks in and takes the ball. He notices that the broken glasses pieces were already picked up and clean.

Baji turns to look at you. “My name is Baji Keisuke. What is yours?”

Your lips curl into a weak smile. “My name is Y/N…”

Baji walks towards you. “Are you sick,Y/N?” His expression was somewhat worried.

You nod. “I’ve been here forever.” You laugh. “Mama told me I can’t go outside because I get sick easily so I stay at the hospital so Mr. Doctor can help me…”

Baji frowned. He was always an active kid who spend most of his time playing around so when he heard that you don’t get to go outside,it made him sad. “Is it okay if I visit you sometime.”

Your eyes widens as color appears on your cheeks,you then smiled brightly. “I would love that!”

True to his words,Baji immediately visited you the next day.

Ever since Baji entered your life,your life has been full of colors. Baji would always talk about how he spend his day,he would talk about his friends and all the crazy thing they would do.

He would always visit you,never making you feel lonely. Along the way he even introduced some of his friends. First he brought Mikey along and then the next Mitsuya and Pachin.

You were scared at first when Baji said they were in gangs but when you got to know them,they were just dorks,lovable and funny dorks.

“I heard this time we are going to have a white Christmas.” You said as you looked outside.

Baji who was cutting apples for you, stopped as he looks at you. “Are you going to be with your parents?”

You shook your head. “Both my mom and dad are going to be busy with work so they said we can’t celebrate it with me this time.”

You smiled as you turned to look at Baji. “But the nurses said they’re going to set up a Christmas tree so I’m excited!”

Baji looks at how your eyes brightened when you talked about the Christmas tree. You looked so happy talking about and that made you seem so much beautiful.

“I’m sure it would look so pretty-“ Your words came to a halt when you started coughing. The coughing never seemed to die down making Baji rush to your side and when it finally did,there were blood in your hands. He looked at you in horror but you didn’t seem to panic,rather you looked as if you were think ‘Not this again.’ As if this happened regularly.

“I’ll get the doctor real quick!” With that he rushes away.

…….

To your dismay the Christmas tree was smaller than expected but nevertheless you enjoyed the cake your parents ordered for you,you ended up eating them with the grandma next door.

Maybe it was because you weren’t with Baji today,the day felt bit gloomier even-though it was such a joyous day. You missed Baji. 

Just when you were about to sleep,tiny knocks were heard at your door. “Psttt, Y/N.”

You look at the door confused. “Baji what are you doing here?”

Before you knew it,Baji makes you wear a thick jacket and cover your neck with a muffler not answering your question.The wide grin on his face perked your curiosity more.

He then kneels in front of you,his back facing you. “Get on!”

“Huh?”

Baji turns to you and he gives you a grin. “I’m going to show you a huge Christmas tree.”

Baji and you then sneak out of the hospital as he carries you to the main town. You gleam at how beautifully the place was decorated. The air outside was cold but it was so fresh, so much frsh as compared to the air in your hospital room.

“It started snowing!” You shouted excited as you raised one of you hand to try and hold it,only for it to melt as soon as it touches you. “The report was right! We’re having a white Christmas!” It was your first time actually being outside when it was snowing, normally you'd only watch the snow from inside.

Places were beautifully lit, decorated with lights filled with joyful atmosphere. Some with their family others on dates. As people start to stare at the sky taking in the entrance of the snow.

“We’re here!” Baji stops walking as he nudges his head at a particular direction.

There at a distance was a huge Christmas tree, decorated with fairy lights, colorful bulbs and small other decorations. “Wow…”

“Beautiful isn’t it-“ Baji stopped speaking as he looked at your expression. Your eyes gleamed as it shone,from all the lights, you nose and cheeks slightly flushed from cold but the most beautiful part was your smile.

You burrowed you face against Baji’s neck,making him feel ticklish but he didn’t mind it rather he love it. “Thank you Keisuke …” He could feel your breath against his neck.

“I’m so glad I could spend the Christmas with you…”

……

“I hate school!” Baji shouts as he messes his hair in frustration. “I don’t know why I have to study this bull shit!” Baji was currently in you room as he worked on his homework while you were reading a book. A pleasant way you guys would spend your time together. It has almost been two years since you guys met.

You laugh at Baji’s expression as you set down the book you were reading. “Come on now~ Don’t say that..I think school must be fun.”

Baji stops as he realizes what he did. You were someone who could never join school after multiple incidents of you passing out or getting rushed to hospitals when you were a kid.

You couldn’t experience school like he did. Baji huffs as he goes back to his books. “Fine… I’ll aim for twenty marks this time.”

“Twenty? That’s not even the pass mark.” You laugh at him. “How about you go for thirty at least.”

“Thats not the pass mark either, Y/N!“

You were about to say something when a sudden thought came into mind. “Keisuke … I actually was watching tv yesterday and I saw someone making a pumpkin themed cake…”

“So I thought I’d want to eat that but I don’t think I can complete it by myself. So how about you join me…?” Your cheeks flushed red.

You were basically asking him out on a date.Sure you guys spend time together alone but you never once made an offer like this to him. It has been months since you figured out you had feelings so Baji but you never really acted on it.

Since the thought of you getting rejected and in turn losing a beloved friend scared you to no end.

“Sure!” You turned your head quickly at his reply. Baji was smiling as well as he continued. “When would it be?”

You smile as you brought your hands together, excited. “I was thinking of October 31..”

“Ah… I don’t think I can join you then…” Baji replied regretfully. “How about November 1?”

“Sure!” As long as you could spend time with Baji, you were happy.

But then that day never came.

That day you waited for Baji to enter the room,with an untouched cake box on the table. The door opens to reveal Mikey,Draken and Mitsuya.

“Baji…Baji died during our fight against Valhalla …”

Would it be funny if you said you ate the cake while you cried? Probably,but that’s what you actually did. Stuffing you mouth with the soft creamy treat as tears pool you eyes.

Days after were as if a curtain closed closed your window, everything felt so much dim and it didn’t help that your condition seemed to worsen.

You were losing weight at an alarming rate,coughing up more blood at frequent rates. You grew increasingly weaker as you parents even took time off their jobs to nurse you.

But at certain nights you would wake up in tears,as you could barely breathe as you searched for Baji,hoping to see him with you in the room. “Keisuke…”

It was a peaceful winter evening ,the air was cold and places were quiet as white snow gently falls in the ground.

People outside were looking and hoping that the snow would set properly. Kids were already outside as they excitedly play out, parents in their homes were making food to warm themselves up.

“Stay with me Y/N!”

People were rushing all over the room as you dad hold your crying mom.

You head felt as if it was going to burst,a strong sense of nausea filled you. Everything you hear and see seemed so muffled and blur.

Despite you body feeling limp, it was twitching. You breathing which was rapid at first seemed to now slow down,accompanied with a strong aching pain.

Then suddenly all those suffering at once disappear.

You entered into a white place,as if each and every part was covered in snow.Your body felt light with no presence of pain that you were feeling just a second before.

 You walked around too see that in a distance was a very familiar person.A person who made you life so much brighter. A person who you enjoyed every moment spend with him. A person you loved.

That person turns around as he expression turns into a frown.

“Why did you join me so early?”

You smile as a tear rolls down your face. “I guess I missed you too much,Keisuke.”

[helloalycia]

my patient’s neighbour [one] // wanda maximoff

summary: whilst caring for a new patient of yours, you definitely didn't expect to fall for her cute neighbour, Wanda Maximoff

warning/s: very minor mentions of injuries and death

author's note: okay so firstly, buckle in, folks, this is gonna be like 6 parts long lol. Also, I google translated all the Russian bits so i apologise if they are incorrect! okay, you may enjoy now :)

part two | part three | part four | part five | part six | part seven | masterlist | wattpad

"38... 38... 38..."

I scanned the doors to the many apartments in the hall, hoping to find the one that belonged to my newest patient – Anna Pivec. As a nurse, I was always given new patients to visit and tend to until they no longer needed it or chose not to have me around. I'd just been assigned a new patient, Anna, and was excited to meet her.

"38!" I said to myself, spotting the door at the end of the hallway. I knocked on before waiting patiently, hoping she wasn't sleeping or anything. It wasn't too early – 10AM – and she knew I was coming, so finger's crossed.

The door opened to reveal a short, old lady with grey hair and a cane in her hand. I smiled kindly, meeting her cloudy gaze.

"You must be the one my granddaughter is paying to look after me because she can't do it herself," the woman spoke before I could introduce myself. Stepping to the side, she motioned with her cane. "Come on in."

My smile dropped at her abruptness. "I, er, yeah, I guess that's me." As I walked in, I said, "My name is Y/N Y/L/N. The nurse from–"

"Yeah, I know where you're from," she cut me off, closing the door and heading further into her apartment. "They sent me a brochure, milaya."

I followed after her, surprised at how quick she was for an old lady with back and heart problems. She was leading me into the open plan living-room and kitchen.

"I'm sorry – milaya? What does that mean?" I asked politely, hoping I didn't come across as rude.

She waved her hand dismissively, mumbling something to herself in what I think was Russian. Her profile did say she was from Sokovia, so maybe that was it.

"Okay, erm, well, as I said," I changed the subject, figuring she wouldn't give me an answer, "I'm Y/N. I'll be here five times a week and basically be doing anything you need me to do. Of course, I only want you to be comfortable in your own home, so if you ever feel anything but, please let me know."

She hummed in acknowledgement before motioning for me to follow her. I set my bag on the kitchen counter before sitting on the couch as she did so on the recliner. She sighed with content as the pain on her back was eased from taking a seat.

"Tell me about yourself," she said gently.

I smiled with amusement. "That's usually what I ask my patients."

"Do forgive me, milaya," she said, and I made a mental note to bring a Russian-English dictionary with me tomorrow, "but you're a stranger in my home. I'd prefer to know about you before I let you take care of me."

I nodded, slightly impressed. Her profile didn't do her justice. Usually, the elderly I cared for were quick to allow me to do my thing, never really questioning who I was or what my intentions were. I was starting to get the impression that Anna was a strong, stubborn woman in a little old lady's body – definitely not one to mess around with.

"Okay, well, I'm a nurse," I began with the basics, and from there, went into a long ramble about my job, how I got into it, what it consisted of...

Anna was full of questions, taking the time to get to know me and I her. Once I had told her everything I could think to, she told me about her life. How she lived in Sokovia up until she was thirty-five years old and had to flee with her husband and daughter because of the war. She gushed about the both of them, a twinkle in her eye as she recalled their livelihoods like they were still alive. Her husband had unfortunately passed many years ago due to liver problems – "All that drinking, milaya! Us Sokovians are a force to be reckoned with!" – and her daughter had passed in a car accident not long after.

It was a tragic tale, but she didn't let it bring her down. In fact, she seemed grateful to have lived it and I couldn't help but smile as she shared it with me.

I noticed she would speak short phrases in Russian mid-conversation, without realising, which didn't make it easier for me to understand, but I couldn't bring it in myself to interrupt her to ask what they meant because she said it with such sincerity that I figured it reminded her of her home.

After our conversation, I made her lunch and gave her her medication before watching some TV with her and pretty much talking to her once again. She was quite an interesting woman, different to my usual patients, and I was enjoying our time together. After spending the day there, I wished her a good night before leaving.

When I returned the next morning, I let myself in with the key Anna gave me and called out a good morning.

"In here!" an unfamiliar female voice called out.

I furrowed my brows as I took off my jacket and headed into the living-area. Anna was sat in her recliner as usual, but she had a guest sat on her couch. A young woman, possibly my age, with long dark hair and a friendly smile on her lips was sat comfortably; she had a cup of tea in her hands and her legs pulled up on the couch like she lived there.

The stranger and Anna exchanged words in Russian briefly before the former stood up, about to introduce herself.

"Oh, are you her granddaughter?" I asked, putting two and two together. It was the only explanation I could think of for how comfortable she was and the fact that she was also Sokovian (I assumed, anyway).

The girl laughed, her green eyes sparkling as she shook her head. Putting out her hand, she said, "I'm Wanda Maximoff. Anna's neighbour."

Slightly embarrassed by my mistake, I smiled awkwardly and shook her hand. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have– I just thought because you were speaking Russian that–"

"It's fine, no harm no foul," she put me at ease quickly, before taking her seat again. "I've lived next door to Anna for about a year now. Sometimes I keep her company on my days off."

I set my bag on the floor before taking a seat on the couch, leaving a gap between Wanda and I.

"That's nice," I said with a smile before looking to Anna. "How are you feeling this morning, Mrs Pivec?"

She sighed, waving her hand dismissively, before saying something to Wanda in Russian who was listening intently. Nodding her head, Wanda looked to me with amusement.

"What did she say?" I asked, quirking a brow.

"She said she told you to stop calling her Mrs Pivec yesterday," Wanda translated, trying not to laugh.

"Just call me Anna, Y/N," Anna added with a nod. "And I'm fine. Just had breakfast with Wanda here."

"Breakfast," I repeated slowly. "How long ago was that? Just gotta make sure you get your meds."

"Shoot, am I doing your job?" Wanda asked, slightly panicked.

"No, no, you're not." I laughed at the way she scrunched her nose. "I mean, it would help if I could have breakfast with Miss– Anna, so I know when she has her medication. But it's all good."

"Are you sure? I can leave if I'm in the way," Wanda said with a frown.

"No need," I reassured her. "If Anna doesn't mind your presence, it's all good. I'm just here to look after her, clean up, make sure she eats, has her meds."

Wanda looked to Anna, who seemed unbothered by her presence.

"She can stay," Anna said with a shrug. "Makes it feel less like I'm a pet."

I opened my mouth to say something, possibly make her feel better, but I wasn't sure what to say.

"Don't mind her," Wanda reassured, giving Anna a knowing look before shooting me an easygoing smile. "She tends to speak her mind exactly as it is. No filter whatsoever. And very stubborn. You may have noticed."

I cracked a smile, feeling better knowing that it wasn't just me who noticed Anna's unique personality traits.

"Hey, that stubbornness and lack of filter is exactly how I beat my husband and his friends in every poker game back home," Anna said with a playful smirk.

Wanda and I chuckled, before the brunette leaned on the couch comfortably and looked to me.

"We finished breakfast, maybe, ten minutes ago? I made us eggs and toast," she answered my question from earlier.

I hummed before getting up with my bag and heading to the kitchen. Setting my bag on the counter, I grabbed my diary and also Anna's medication from its place on the kitchen counter.

"I'll give you your medicine now, Anna," I told her, already grabbing a glass of water for her.

"Thank you, milaya," she called back, and I spun around, immediately going to get my Russian-English dictionary from my bag. "Wait, I know what that is!" I flicked through the pages and scanned it eagerly. "Milaya... milaya... milaya! Okay, it means... sweetie."

"Sweetie," Wanda said at the same time, and I looked up to see her watching me from behind her cup of tea, trying not to laugh again.

"I guess another perk of your presence is being the translator," I said sheepishly, realising just how eager I was a second ago. "Anna likes to speak Russian a lot, which I'm fine with of course, but..." I waved the dictionary in the air.

"It's funny watching tvoye lichiko, milaya," Anna said with that same mischievous smirk on her face.

I looked down to my dictionary, struggling to pinpoint a single word in her sentence that I could search. It was overwhelming, the words going in one ear and out the other.

"She said it's funny watching your little face, sweetie," Wanda translated upon seeing my frozen state.

I relaxed my shoulders. "Thanks." Then I realised what she said. "Hey!"

Anna laughed as Wanda grinned, and I was suddenly glad she was here. I grabbed Anna's meds with a glass of water before giving them to her. After making sure she swallowed them properly, I put the glass to the side and took a seat on the couch again.

"So, you said you visited Anna on your days off?" I asked Wanda, intrigued by why a neighbour would be so interested in another. It wasn't very common in today's day and age.

"She's almost always here," Anna answered before Wanda could speak. I looked to her as she continued with a grateful smile. "Helps me with everything. Groceries, cleaning, my medication."

"So basically me but unpaid," I joked, and Anna laughed.

"Exactly," she agreed, and I looked to Wanda to see her blushing, eyes avoiding mine.

"That's really sweet," I said gently, earning her attention. "You're a really good neighbour, Wanda."

Wanda ran a hand through her hair. "It's nothing. If anything, I enjoy being here. Anna reminds me of Sokovia and my family and, well, home."

"Oh, so you're Sokovian, too?"

She nodded before smiling playfully. "Did the accent not give it away?"

I hid a smile. "I didn't want to assume. I mean, you could've been Czech. Slovakian. Basically anything else."

"Okay, I'll give you that," she gave in, tilting her head to the side, smile widening.

It was then that I learnt her smile was extremely contagious.

Same as yesterday, my plan was to stay the day with Anna, though this time Wanda also kept her company (and me, too). After lunch, I left the two of them to watch some TV as I excused myself to change Anna's bedsheets in her room, ready for bed tonight.

As I was doing so, I heard the door open and glanced over my shoulder to see Wanda entering the room. I gave her a smile before continuing to replace the pillowcase.

"Here, I can help," she offered, and didn't give me chance to decline as she grabbed the pillow on the other side of the bed and began to change its case.

"You sure? You know it's my job, right?" I teased, looking up at her over the bed between us.

She rolled her eyes playfully. "I'm aware. Just thought I'd make it a bit easier for you."

I chuckled. "Well, I appreciate it... how is Anna?"

"Dozed off," Wanda quipped with an expectant nod. "Same time every day. Like clockwork."

"Huh." I thought back to yesterday and how she ended up taking a nap after lunch, too. "Noted. Thanks."

Wanda smiled before putting the pillowcase on the pillow and puffing it with her hands. I did the same, content with its appearance, before moving to the duvet. Wordlessly, Wanda grabbed one end and began to help me put it on, which I appreciated. The duvet was bigger than I was and definitely a two-person job.

"Hey, can I ask you something?" I spoke out of the blue as we were putting on the duvet cover.

"Go for it," she said encouragingly, glancing sideways.

"Of course, you don't have to answer, but I thought I'd ask since I'm going to be looking after Anna for a while," I gave a little disclaimer, before saying, "She makes a lot of snide remarks about her granddaughter. Do they not get along?"

Wanda sighed quietly. "Her granddaughter doesn't really visit her here. She rarely calls."

"Her daughter's kid?"

"The only one," Wanda confirmed. "She keeps her distance, ever since her mum – Anna's daughter – passed. She just pays for, well, you."

I frowned. "That's sad."

"Yeah," Wanda agreed, breathing out.

The two of us spread the duvet over the double bed before I looked to her with a small smile.

"At least she has you," I pointed out. "It's nice you give up your free time to spend it with her."

"Like I said, it's good for me, too," she reminded me, returning the smile.

"So what do you do when you're not here keeping her company?" I asked curiously, moving to Anna's bedside to clear it up a little.

Wanda hid her smile behind a look of confusion. "Do you not– don't you recognise me?"

I quirked a brow, pausing my actions. "Am I supposed to?"

She snickered, shaking her head, eyes falling to the bed with mild disbelief. "I mean, I guess not. I'm–" She chuckled, looking to my confused face. "I'm one of the Avengers."

I studied her, her words not quite settling in. But when they did, I realised I actually recognised her and she was one of the Avengers.

"Oh my God!" I blurted, the penny finally dropping. "The one with the weird red energy powers! I mean– not weird but– the magic!"

She stifled laughter, nodding her head. Just like her smile, her laughter was contagious, too.

"Yeah, that's me," she confirmed.

I made a weird motion with my free hand, like I'd seen her do on TV when saving the day. "Does Anna know about your y'know?"

Wanda crossed her arms, raising a brow and watching me with a humoured gaze. "Is that supposed to be my powers?"

I stopped making the motion and felt my neck heating up. "I– yeah."

Laughter spilled from her lips yet again, automatically making me smile. I didn't mind that I'd made a fool of myself all of a sudden.

"Anna knows, yes," Wanda said with a bright smile. "She actually recognised me straight away. Much quicker than you. And she's eighty."

Waving my hand to distract from my flushed cheeks, I said, "Pfft, she probably confused you with someone else and played along when you told her who you were."

"Yeah, I'm sure that was it, ty milyy maneken," she retorted with her piercing gaze.

"No fair, my dictionary is in the other room," I said with a pout, and she only laughed even more.

"Guess you'll never know," she teased with a smirk, making me roll my eyes to distract from the way it made me feel when she stared at me like that.

It was much later on when I learnt that she had called me 'a cute dummy'. And that was the beautiful start to Wanda and I's introduction into each other's lives.

—

From then onwards, about eighty percent of the time I would go to care for Anna, Wanda was present, too and I didn't mind one bit. Not only did she keep Anna company, but she made my job a lot easier whilst keeping me company as well.

I was beginning to look forward to seeing her whenever I would open the door. Whether she was cleaning something up, playing board games with Anna or simply having a tidy up around the apartment, she'd always stop what she was doing and help me with whatever was in my hands as she greeted me at the door. It was adorable. She was adorable.

The few times she wasn't present because of work only made me miss her, the apartment feeling emptier than usual. Even Anna agreed, the two of us making up for the lack of the Sokovian girl's presence by distracting ourselves with other activities.

I was convinced Anna was warming up to me as she freely let me care for her without resistance. Obviously, she wouldn't be Anna if she didn't throw funny remarks my way or speak to me in Russian, knowing I didn't understand her, but it was tolerable. And I was liking her, too; she was easily becoming one of the best patients I cared for. There was just so much personality to her that I couldn't help but smile whenever I spoke to her.

One time, I was helping Anna out at her place when Wanda wasn't present. I was leading her into her bed when I decided now was a better time than ever to ask her about her birthday on Sunday, which I knew was then because of her file.

"So, I'll be seeing you in two days next," I told her as I pulled the duvet over her. "And a little birdie told me it's your birthday then. Eighty-one, Anna! That's amazing!"

She smiled but seemed embarrassed that I knew.

"Tell me what you want and I can make it happen," I said promisingly, smiling down at her.

She waved her hand. "I don't want anything, milaya (sweetie). Your presence is enough."

I chuckled. "As sweet as that is, I know everybody wants something for their birthday. Now please, Anna. What can I do to make the day a bit more special?"

She pondered my question momentarily and I waited for her to speak, hoping it was something doable.

"I would love to have a traditional Sokovian meal," she said reluctantly. "It's been a long time."

I breathed out quietly, patting her hand gently. "I can do that, Anna. Don't you worry."

She smiled genuinely, before shooing me away. "Okay, enough sappiness, ty mozhesh' uyti seychas (you can leave now)."

I laughed, standing up and dusting my pants off. I only knew what that phrase meant because she said it almost every time before my shift ended and I left for the day. I knew she didn't mean it as harshly as it sounded.

"I'm going, I'm going," I said, already heading to the door. "I'll see you Sunday, birthday girl."

She groaned quietly, making me grin, before I double checked everything was okay in the living-area and grabbed my stuff to leave.

As easy of a request that it was, I knew absolutely nothing about cooking a traditional Sokovian meal. But I knew of one person who did and instantly headed to Wanda's apartment next door to see if she was home.

With a quick knock, I waited patiently. I wasn't sure if she was even home since she hadn't visited Anna today and she usually did so if she was. When I was beginning to think she wasn't, I told myself I could Google a recipe and put something together, but then the door opened and revealed a tired-looking Wanda.

"Y/N," she said with surprise, but a friendly smile was on her lips nonetheless.

"Hey, I'm so sorry to disturb you this late, but I wanted to ask– wait, what happened to your face?" I stopped speaking and lost my own smile when I noticed the faint scratches and bruises dusting her skin.

"Oh, it's nothing–" she started, raising her hand, fingers wavering over her head, but I cut her off.

"Shit, Wanda, what happened?" I reached out, taking her hand in mine and studying the cast that was around her wrist. Concerned frown on my lips, I glanced up at her. "Are you okay?"

"It's fine, Y/N," she tried to reassure, but I couldn't help it as my worry got the better of me and I studied the cuts on her cheek. "I just came back from a mission. Minor injuries. Honestly."

I let go of her hand, realising I was still holding it, and nodded slightly. "Right..." Realising she must have been exhausted, I awkwardly stepped back and shook my head with realisation. "Sorry, I should go. I didn't mean to bot–"

"You were saying something," she interrupted, nodding encouragingly. "You wanted to ask me something. What is it?"

I paused, nodding. Admittedly, I was still worried about the bruises on her forehead. I knew she was an Avenger and this was probably the norm for her, but to me, it looked like she'd just got mugged. And the irregularity of that worried me.

"Yeah, I was saying," I finally found my words, trying to ignore the way her tired eyes peered at me hopefully. "It's Anna's birthday on Sunday and she wants to have a traditional Sokovian meal to celebrate. The only problem is, I don't know what that is." Wanda cracked a smile as I continued. "Do you, maybe, have a recipe I could use?"

"Of course," she said before motioning for me to follow her. "Come on in."

I followed after her, closing the door behind me, and stopped at the kitchen counter patiently. As she searched for a notebook in her drawer, I subtly glanced around, taking in the inside of Wanda's apartment. I'd never actually been in it before, but the minimal décor was very her. She didn't have many knickknacks and everything on display served a purpose.

"There's some recipes in here," she said, grabbing my attention. She slid the notebook across the counter and leaned forward with a smile. "Take your pick."

I flicked through it briefly, smiling at the notebook filled with recipes, all in Wanda's neat, cursive handwriting.

"Thank you," I said gratefully, looking up and catching her staring.

She perked up, clearing her throat as she nodded in response before looking the other way. Cute.

"Are you working on Sunday?" I asked with a raised brow, before rolling my eyes playfully. "What am I saying? Of course you're not. Not with that wrist."

She chuckled, still avoiding my eyes. "I'm not."

"Well, why don't you come over for her birthday? You can help me cook her a meal. Or rather, I can help you cook it since I'll probably screw it up."

Finally meeting my eyes, she smiled with amusement. "Are you sure?"

I gave her a knowing look, ignoring the butterflies swirling in my stomach as she held my gaze with her intense dark eyes. "Yes, I'm sure. Anna will love to celebrate with you. And..." I pursed my lips, taking a leap of faith and adding, "and I'd love it, too."

Wanda let out a quiet laugh. "You would, would you?"

I straightened up, smile widening. "Yeah, I would."

She tilted her head, studying me with a curious smile. "Well then, I clearly can't say no."

Something stirred in my chest the longer she watched me and I oddly liked it. It was obvious that Wanda was a beautiful girl with a heart of gold, but I guess I hadn't really acknowledged that I may have had feelings for her until now. And I didn't mind one bit.

"Great," I finally found my words, nodding slightly. "I'll see you Sunday."

She mirrored my expression, saying, "See you Sunday," and I knew I couldn't wait until then.

[t0wnspersonb]

Day Off (Bakugou Katsuki x Reader)

Word Count: 2,158

Warnings: FLUFF, bad language, suggestive language, my shit writing lmao

Summary: You hardly ever got to spend time with your husband, so when he has a day off, well, your heart can’t help but be entirely full. Especially when you see him interacting with your children.

~~~~

Anonymous said:

Hello💜💜 I was wondering if you could make an fluff/smut imagine about where Bakugou where the reader is his beloved wife they both have kids and just shows how their daily lives are. Btw I’m a huge fan of your imagines🥰

~~~~

I hope you enjoy this request anon! I didn’t do smut this time around, but here is some fluffy papa Bakugou for you! Also thank you so much for your kind words! I’m so glad you like my shit writing lol.

I always enjoy writing fluffy shit like this lmao. I love Bakugou with all my fucking heart and I hope you guys enjoy this too!

~~~~

You loved your family, you would do anything for them, the unconditional love that you held in your heart was something that would never be questioned.

 But sometimes, you loved your alone time just a tad bit more.

 Like now. 

 The house was clean, the house was quiet; and you actually got to enjoy a nice hot cup of coffee, fresh and incredibly delicious for your sleep deprived senses.

 You were an early riser, maybe it was because of all the morning training and runs that Bakugou had forced you to do when you guys were younger, or maybe it was because when you had kids you had realized that there just wasn’t enough time in the day to get everything done. 

 Quite possibly it was the latter.

 But everything was done, the laundry, the dishes, sweeping and mopping, you had gone to the grocery store yesterday, a surprisingly pleasant trip since the kids were actually behaving for once.

 You owe it to your husband, who had gotten off of his hero duties early yesterday and had helped you around the house, and he was off today.

 The first time in a long time.

 You probably should’ve lingered in your shared bed just a little longer, you hardly had alone time with the explosion hero as it was, but… you had been dying to read the new book that you had gotten weeks ago. Bakugou could handle waking up alone for one day, right?

 “Are you fucking kidding me? You shit nerd, how long have you been doing this?” his familiar gruff voice sighed from the entrance of the living room.

 You glanced up from your book, a small smile tugging at your lips as you took in his sleepy figure.

 Bakugou’s blonde hair was even more disheveled, his sweats hung low on his hips, one of his large hands was underneath his shirt, absentmindedly scratching at the skin that stretched across his sculpted stomach.

 You took a lot of pleasure in the fact that you got to see the most popular pro hero so domestic, so casual.

 His ring caught the morning light streaming through the window, glinting beautifully as he stretched out his muscular arms above his head, his shirt rising up, exposing the lower half of his stomach to your greedy eyes. His biceps bulged out beautifully against the sleeves of his shirt.

 You also took pleasure in just staring at your husband, that beautiful specimen of a man was all yours.

 “What time is it?” you asked. 

 “Almost 9.” 

 “Hmmm. Since 4:30 then?” You pondered, placing your bookmark between the pages, and closing the book completely, placing it on the coffee table.

 Bakugou made a disgusted noise in the back of his throat as he padded off towards the kitchen.

 You laughed softly to yourself, following after the muscular male. 

 “Stop fucking staring at me.” Bakugou grumbled, vermilion eyes sliding over to you briefly as he drank down his glass of water.

 “Can’t a wife just look at her husband?” you asked innocently, he walked over to you, his hands coming down on either side of your face, squeezing your cheeks together tightly.

 “Not when the wife ditches her husband in the morning to read a stupid fucking book.” he sneered.

 You laughed, grabbing at his much larger hands, and pulling them away from your face.

 “I’m sorry Katsu, what can I do to make it up to you?” you teased lightly.

 You shouldn’t have asked.

 A wicked smirk stretched across his face. “Get on your knees.” his voice was husky, commanding as he stared at you, daring you to challenge him.

 You could feel your lips part at his words, a pink blush beginning to dust your cheeks.

 It had been a long time since you -

 “Mama?” 

 The moment was gone completely, the wide smirk that Bakugou wore turned into a deep scowl.

 “Good morning baby.” you cooed turning to look at your small child. He was the spitting image of Bakugou, but he was the sweetest boy, completely unlike his father.

 He rubbed at his small eyes before they landed on Bakugou, a sweet smile stretching across his face. 

 “Papa. Up.” he held out his little arms, urging Bakugou to pick him up.

 You could see the scowl visibly melting away from Bakugou’s face, replaced with a gentle one as he gazed at his son. 

 It was hard for Bakugou, being able to spend time with his children, despite how rough he was, how crude his words could be; he was a wonderful father, a wonderful husband.

 You were entirely lucky.

 Bakugou easily swung his child up into his muscular arms. Your son sighing in happiness as he rests his head against Bakugou’s broad shoulders, his thumb coming up to rest between his lips.

 The sight of the two of them together melted your heart completely, clenching tightly in your chest as Bakugou pressed a gentle kiss to the top of your son’s head.

 “Papa’s home today?” Another familiar voice spoke. You turned to see your daughter staring at Bakugou in curiosity.

 She was the oldest, and the spitting image of you, except… well her personality was entirely her father’s.

 “Why don’t you guys go watch some cartoons while I get breakfast started?” you hummed.

 “Come on you shit stain.” Bakugou ruffled his daughter’s hair, urging her out of the kitchen into the living room.

 You and your daughter frowned, you at the fact that he just called your child a shit stain, and her because he messed up her already messy hair.

 “Your breath smells like shit Papa.” your daughter said, tone annoyed as she shoved his hand away from her head.

 You sighed tiredly, hand resting on the side of your face.

 “Oi, you aren’t allowed to curse.” Bakugou scolded, a large tick mark appearing on his forehead and he grabbed your daughter’s head pushing her out of the kitchen.

 You could hear their loud bickering fading into the living room, causing you to sigh deeply once again. 

 But a smile twitched on your lips, it had been a long time since you guys got to enjoy the morning together like this.

 When you had finally finished cooking breakfast you went to go grab the rest of your family. 

 Your heart melted at the sight. Bakugou held both kids in his arms, your children looking incredibly small as they cuddled up against their father.

 Despite the fact that your eldest and Bakugou always fought, she was a daddy’s girl through and through. Bakugou’s fingers combed through her unruly hair absentmindedly, while his other hand rubbed up and down your son’s back.

 Their eyes were glued to the TV as some anime played.

 You cleared your throat, all three pairs of eyes flickering to your form. 

 “Breakfast is ready.” you smiled, watching as your little girl climbed off of Bakugou padding past you towards her seat in the kitchen. Bakugou lifted up your son, easily carrying him into the kitchen and setting him down on his highchair.

 “What should we do today?” you mused as you guys began eating, Bakugou was feeding your son, making a disgusted face when he spit the food back out.

 “I need new shoes for school mama.” Your daughter said, mouth full of food.

 Bakugou made another disgusted face, handing your daughter a napkin.

 “Wipe your face brat, and don’t talk with your mouth full.” He lectured. 

 “Can we go to the park today?” her eyes lit up, ignoring her father completely as she tossed the crumpled-up napkin at his face.

 “Don’t throw shit at me! Don’t ignore me either!” he growled, a tick mark appearing on his face once again.

 “I’m trying to talk to mama, and you keep interrupting, annoying papa.” she snapped back.

 You sighed. “No fighting you two. We should be able to go to the mall today....” you trailed off, trying to remember if there was anything important you had to do today.

 “I need more workout shirts, and new training gloves. Damn Deku borrowed mine and never returned them.” Bakugou said gruffly.

 “Then I guess we can all go on a trip today.” you smiled. “Let’s finish up and start getting ready.”

 ****

 You almost forgot what it was like to bring the entire family out, it had been too long since the last time you guys did something like this.

 Needless to say, you were already exhausted.

 It took forever to get everyone out of the house. Bakugou did his best to help get the kids ready but… between the constant fighting with him and your daughter and your son's endless crying about not wanting to go and not wanting to put on pants, and Bakugou’s attempts at intimacy as you got ready... well, you wanted to get this over with already.

 “What do you think?” your daughter asked, pointing her toe out, the Uravity themed shoes on full display for you.

 “Very pretty, do you want those ones?” you asked. 

 She nodded excitedly.

 “Why do you want round face’s shoes? Why not mine?” Bakugou grumbled, staring down at his daughter accusingly.

 “Yours are ugly papa. I don’t like the colors. Uravity is my favorite hero.” She said face blank as she stared at the blonde male.

 This was definitely a sight to see, considering that Bakugou had your son perched on his hip and he was glaring down at the small girl who was glaring right back at him.

 “Huh? Ground Zero isn’t your favorite hero?” he barked.

 “No. Uravity is.”

 “Well mama’s favorite hero is Ground Zero.” He smirked, eyes flickering over to you.

 “Actually, Red Riot is my favorite hero.” You teased, soft laughter escaping your lips as your husband’s face fell at the mention of his best friend.

 “Let’s go over here!” Your daughter said excitedly, the conversation completely abandoned as she took sight of the toy store across from the shoe store you guys were at.

 “Hold on. I still have to pay.” you said in amusement, walking over to the cashier.

 Bakugou stood next to you, one of his large hands resting on the small of your back. When you had finished paying and began trailing after your excited daughter, he leaned in close.

 “You’re getting punished for saying that.” Bakugou growled near your ear. 

 “Is that a promise?” you challenged, ignoring the blush in your cheeks and the pleasant twist that occurred in the pit of your stomach.

 “You can count on it.” he growled, a smirk playing on his lips before he walked off to catch up with your daughter.

 You were definitely looking forward to it.

 ****

 You sighed loudly as you sat down on the park bench. 

 “Here.” Bakugou handed you one of the drinks he got from the vending machine, his eyes never leaving his children that were now playing on the playground equipment.

 “Did you have fun today?” you asked, resting your head against his shoulder as he took a seat beside you.

 “No.” he snorted, and then his expression changed, his eyes softening completely, his face relaxed. “It’s been a while since we got to spend the day together.”

 His large fingers found your own, intertwining together tightly. “Thank you.”

 You glanced over at him curiously. “For what?”

 You could see a soft blush coating his cheeks. He was embarrassed. It wasn’t anything new though, you knew your husband well enough to know that he was terrible at verbally expressing his feelings. 

 “You’re a good mother, and a good wife. Thank you for always taking care of the kids… and me.” he grumbled.

 Your expression softened, your heart warming completely. It was rare when Bakugou praised you like this, again, he was terrible at expressing his feelings verbally, especially something so gentle and heartfelt like this.

 “Of course, Katsu.” you beamed at him.

 He scoffed at your expression, but reached for you, cupping the side of your face as he stooped low, pressing his mouth against yours carefully.

 You hummed low in your throat; eyes fluttering shut as you kissed him back. Sweet and gentle, incredibly warm and full of love.

 “Ew. You actually let papa do that? That’s disgusting.” You broke free from the kiss and turned to see your daughter staring at you guys in disgust. 

 You laughed softly at her comment, Bakugou on the other hand…

 “Aren’t you supposed to be watching your brother?” he asked, eyebrow twitching in annoyance.

 “No wonder Deku is the number 1 hero.” Your daughter muttered to herself before turning to walk away.

 “What the fuck did you just say you shit?” Bakugou growled, standing up and swooping down, easily throwing your daughter over his shoulders.

 She squealed loudly, contagious giggles escaping her lips as Bakugou jogged over to the playground. He scooped up your other child, swinging him around rapidly.

 A soft smile twitched at your lips as you watched them.

 You loved your little family.

[dreamescapeswriting]

Stressed Out ~ MYG [Request]

WORD COUNT:1.4K

PAIRING: Yoongi x Stressed!Reader

GENRE: Short fic, established-relationship, fluffy yoongi, stressed out reader who snaps at him

A/N: You’re totally going to kill me when you find out I wrote this while I was supposed to be on my break but sdfghjkl; I love you 

The whole day yesterday everything that could have gone wrong...Went wrong. It felt as though the entire universe was out to get you or something. First, you were late to work because of the rain, then you spilt coffee on the floor, then the toner in the printer exploded all over you and to top it all off you ran into your boss chest first getting ink down his new suit, which you had to pay for. It seemed ridiculous in making you pay for his suit when he could quite clearly do it himself or pay someone else to clean it. 

Heading home hadn't been a walk in the park either, you'd managed to run out of gas on the motorway before blowing a tired after pulling out of a garage. It was as if the world was giving you a big, "Fuck you Y/n," right in the face and it appeared as though it wasn't over yet. Staring down at the piece of paper your eyes read the same number over and over again trying to see if you had made some kind of mistake. 

"Who the fuck spends $3K on a suit," You mumbled as you stared down at the invoice that had been given to you yesterday, it was the first time you'd opened it. The night before you'd gone home, gotten straight into bed and ignored the whole world.

It had to be some kind of joke he was making but no, the suit was really $3K. No one you knew spent that on something to wear not even the boys who were famous and went to award shows all of the time.

"Fuck," You groaned to yourself laying back down on the pillows as you stared up at the ceiling. A part of you wished that something great would happen but knowing your luck the ceiling would probably crack and fall on you. Deciding to sit up again you looked at the invoice, screaming out loud as you looked at it once again, luckily for you, the house was empty so you wouldn't have to justify having a day off or screaming the way you did to your husband. Not that Yoong would have minded, he wasn't bothered if you worked or not but you needed something to do in the day though looking back on it now you wish you didn't go yesterday.

Getting out of the car Yoongi smiled as he looked around the streets, it was sunny and warm. Not to warm to the point where he wanted to take off layers of his skin but just warm enough that it was nice out. Kicking off his shoes as he got in he was excited for a day of working from home, he was going to surprise you with dinner that night for when you came home from work. It seemed as though you'd had a bad day the day before and he hadn't been able to do anything to help. As he was about to walk into the living room he heard a loud scream of mental anguish from the bedroom. 

"Babe?!" Panicked he began rushing up the stairs to see what was wrong, it could have been anything from seeing a spider to something happening on TV. He was too busy worrying about you he hadn't stopped to think about what you were doing home at this time of day. Panting as he reached the door he frowned as he saw you holding a sheet of paper in one hand and your head in the other. 

Turning to look at the bedroom door you saw Yoongi standing there with a smile on his face, normally that would have been enough to brighten your day and wash away everything bad that had happened but apparently it wasn't working.

"Did you finish early?" He questioned as he got onto the bed behind you, putting his long legs on either side of your body and smiling even more. He appeared more smiley than usual and it was a little unsettling, he was only like this if he was hiding something about his music. But damn that smile you wanted to wipe it off his face, make him feel as bad as you did right then. How was it that even Yoongi could make you feel annoyed by standing there. Frustration was just bubbling up inside of you and all you wanted to do was be left alone. 

"Baby? What's this?" He picked up the invoice and whistled as he saw the price of the suit, even his wedding suit didn't cost that much. When you said nothing Yoongi continued to talk and talk and talk trying to get you to say something, he could sense that something was bothering you and he wanted to get to the bottom of it.

"Your boss sending you on shopping trips for him?" He laughed loudly which normally would make your heart skip and you could smile brightly with him, his voice alone made you feel as though you could take on the while but today...Today was different. His laugh went through you like nails on a chalkboard and the longer he spoke the more you began to grow annoyed.

"You're being so quiet, that's not like-"

"Shut up! Please just shut up!" You called out to him as he stared back at you shocked, his face turning red as he felt embarrassed. It was the first time he'd ever heard you yell like that at something other than traffic or some idiot driving like a manic on the roads. 

"Babe-" He tried to apologise but you shook your head at him, snatching the paper from his hand, 

"Leave me alone," You mumbled getting up from the bed and heading for the staircase, Yoongi waited for a couple of minutes trying to do as you had wished but it was hard knowing that his wife was clearly upset about something. Causing her to lash out at those around her, he wasn't going to hold it against you. 

As he sat there his mind wandered to what you were doing, it had been silent since you went downstairs. He was about to lay down when he heard you scream out in frustration and something clattering against the floor. 

"Y/n?! What happened?!" He practically sprinted down the stairs to find you on the floor, back against the back door with your knees pressed tightly against your chest. Sobbing into your knees as you mumbled something to him that he didn’t understand, 

"Come again?" Yoongi questioned about to walk into the room when he noticed the ice cream that was leaking down the floor, a spoon that had been the cause of the clattering. 

"I can't do anything right, I'm always spilling things, dropping things and making a mess." You sobbed uncontrollably into your knees again, taking in large breaths as you tried not to hyperventilate yourself. 

"Hey baby, shhh, shhh." Yoong stepped over the ice cream reminding himself to clean it when he'd calmed you down, all he did was sit beside you. Taking your hand in his own just to let you know that he was there. He'd seen this before and not just with you but with the boys when your mind and body had been so worn down you just broke down snapping at anything and everything around you. It would be one small insignificant thing like ice cream falling to the floor that could tip someone over the edge. 

"Come on." He grunted as he stood up, picking you up carefully so he could go and get you into bed for the day. 

"What are we doing, it's almost 11 am." You sniffled as he walked towards the staircase, he simply shook his head at you. 

"It's one of those days. We will just lay in bed together, order food...Watch movies or TV...We'll do anything except what we're supposed to be doing." He told you as he began climbing the stairs, your head resting on his shoulder as he carefully made his way to the bedroom. 

"I'm sorry I snapped at you," You mumbled as he laid you down in the bed, grabbing a t-shirt from the closet to give to you. 

"It's fine. Get changed while I clean up and grab the menus...Find something for us to watch, anything you want-"

"Including Full House?!" You asked excitedly as you stared at him, sighing to himself he nodded. Despite seeing the show a total of almost 12 times he was willing to watch it again just for you. 

Tagline: @lyoongx​ @mitzwinchester​ @rjsmochii​ @taestannie​ @sw33tnight​ @inner​ @sweeneyblue1​ @jin-from-the-block​ @acciocriativity​ @mwitsmejk​ @taeechwitaa​ @justbangtanthingz​

[floralseokjin]

⤑ made-up love song drabbles

First date: Seokjin’s POV

kim seokjin x reader warnings; none! words; 2,196 words

↪︎ read the series here / and drabbles here

Seokjin felt like a drink. It was nine o’clock in the morning, so absolutely out of the question, but it didn’t stop him from craving it. Whiskey. Definitely whiskey. Nana’s PA had just been to pick up Arin for the weekend – Thank God. Finally she would be able to spend time with her mom after a month, which he was over the moon about, and selfishly, that meant his date with you could go ahead. Even if he was so nervous he could throw up. 

Work had been a great distraction for the past two days but once he’d woken up this morning the realisation had dawned on him. He was going on a date tonight. His first in a decade. He still couldn’t believe he’d actually gone through with it and asked you to dinner. He’d faced his fears, possibly made a fool of himself and shared too much about his personal life in the process, but you hadn’t seemed to mind at all. You were so easy to talk to, it was refreshing. He’d felt brave for the first time in months – years.   But it still didn’t stop him from being on pins as soon as he’d opened his eyes this morning. 

He’d showered early, just after Arin had woken up and then he’d helped her get ready for the day too, allowing her to eat her breakfast in front of the television as he tried to swallow down his bowl of porridge too. It tasted like cardboard – but then again, it might have been his cooking. Misook usually made the food around her, when he wasn’t dining out or ordering take out of course. 

Arin had noticed his strange mood straight away. Obviously. 

“Daddy, what’s wrong with you this morning?” She’d asked, looking over at him warily before hesitating. “I am spending the weekend with mom, right?”

“Of course you are, sweetie” he’d rushed, shaking away the  surge of anger he’d felt. It pained him to know she was always expecting the worst lately. “Your mom just text me to say Jia is on her way.” 

She’d smiled then, her face lighting up and he couldn’t help but match it, his nerves disappearing for a while. That was until he was left all alone, the house now empty and silent. He eyed the bottle of whiskey on the kitchen counter (where he’d left it after his small nightcap last night) and shook his head. He should drop you a text, just to check in and see if you were still on for tonight. He needed to find out what time to pick you up anyway. He probably should have messaged you the day before, he panicked suddenly, worrying his bottom lip between his teeth as he pulled his phone from his sweatpants pocket. Oh well, there was no time for regrets, that’s what his father always said. 

It took him at least ten minutes to figure out what to say. His first draft sounded too cheerful, too false, he was trying way too hard and had added an examination point. His second was too formal, fifteen years of sending business emails back and forth obvious. He settled on something in the middle – he hoped.  

Unknown (9:32am)  Hi Y/N,  It’s Kim Seokjin, Arin’s father. Just wondering if you still want to have dinner tonight? If so, please let me know and I will send through the restaurant details. We can decide on a time for me to pick you up.  Regards, Seokjin 

Only, reading it back after he hit send he began to second guess himself. Of course you knew who he was, his confidence might be lacking a little right now but he knew he wasn’t totally forgettable. What an idiot. Not that he could do much, there was no turning back. He’d committed. 

He busied himself with a bit of Saturday morning cleaning while he waited for your reply, and by that he meant straightening up the pillows he and Arin had been sitting against earlier. When he returned to the kitchen, your message was waiting for him. 

You (9:43am)  Of course, send the details. I trust your taste! 

See, exclamation points suited you. It was cute. He could just imagine you saying it in person, your dazzling smile, maybe that little giggle you’d made a few times on Wednesday. He felt something warm in his chest as he got lost in his thoughts, nerves easing once again. You were excited for tonight, he told himself.   Maybe you were even just as nervous as him possibly… 

He spent yet another few minutes composing his reply. A lot more casual this time, signing off with just his name. He didn’t always text like this, Namjoon could vouch for him, but he didn’t think you were both quite there yet. He wanted to show his best self after all. He wanted to impress you. He wanted to make you like him as much as he liked you. 

Seokjin (9:50am)  The sudden pressure… The restaurant’s name is KIM. I hope you like it. Is 7 alright to pick you up? I made reservations for 7:30.  Seokjin 

In truth, this restaurant was one he co-owned with his brother. Seokchul was the executive chef and they were both very proud of how successful their business venture had become. He knew taking you to such a place might seem like a cop-out – or worse, a brag – but that wasn’t the case at all. He wanted to treat you in a place that meant a lot to him. He could have chosen multiple restaurants, he was a regular at quite a few and could easily get a great table, but see, that did seem like he was showing off and he did not want to give you that impression at all. It was the complete opposite of his personality. KIM was a good choice, he was sure of it, and it helped that his brother didn’t work weekends, so there was no risk of bumping into him. Although, he had let him know about the date (and had begged him not to spill to their mother). 

You (9:52am)  I will. 7 sounds perfect. I’ll send through my address. See you later! 

You followed up with a Google Maps link to your home, and he sent a quick thank you – sans his name this time. With a quick sigh he pocketed his phone again, it was time to get on with his day. He had some paperwork from yesterday to complete by Monday morning so he should probably make a start. He stopped to order a light lunch at midday, ate it as he scrolled through his very limited social media before getting back to it. 

He called it a day around 3pm, a call from his mom interrupting his flow. He spent an hour talking, their weekend phone calls were habitual by now and he enjoyed them immensely.  He loved his father of course, but their conversations mostly revolved around work. Despite stepping down as CEO three years ago, he was still a vital member of the company, and Seokjin continued to consult him at every opportunity and lean on him for support when things got stressful. With his mom, she was the woman he could still be a kid around. They could talk about anything and everything, but for her own benefit he left out his plans for tonight. He knew what she was like, she’d get way too excited and overwhelmed and before long she’d be sobbing down the line while simultaneously asking to meet you. She’d been wanting him to meet someone new for so long, much like Mrs. Shin. It was a surprise the two women weren’t conspiring behind his back. 

No, he’d keep it a secret for now. If things went well tonight, then possibly his mother would get to find out. He wasn’t getting his hopes up though – or at least he was trying not to. 

It was just after four when he got off the phone, too early to start getting ready just yet, so he sat in front of the television and tried to concentrate on a series he’d recently started. (It wasn’t going well. He was on about one episode a week out of a nine season TV show.) It was no use though, the nerves were rearing their ugly head again. 

He decided to choose his outfit. Seokjin wasn’t much of a thinker when it came to fashion, he just grabbed whatever he saw first that morning, but tonight he wanted to at least put some effort in. After much deliberation he decided on a navy two piece paired with a white dress shirt. It wasn’t over the top, he thought, but nice enough to make that impression that was so very important to him. He kept his hair simple. He’d managed to squeeze in a haircut yesterday so it made things easier, but upon closer inspection in the mirror he noticed those pesky grey hairs of his glittering in the sunlight. He grimaced, worried now. He didn’t know your exact age yet, but it was obvious he was a few years older than you. He was no spring chicken, especially with those wrinkles around his eyes. He had been called handsome all his life, no stranger to it, but right now he was dubious. 

He pushed his trivial concerns away and concentrated on the next decision. What car he would take. He didn’t want to go too flash – again with the showing off thing – so the Aston Martin was definitely off the cards. He hadn’t actually driven that one much, going through some sort of so-called midlife crisis when he’d bought it straight after his divorce, so he made a mental note to take it out next weekend. He decided on the Mercedes convertible (roof on, of course). It seemed like a suitable choice, not too flashy at all really. He didn’t want to run the risk of putting you off him or overwhelming you with showy displays. He was well aware of the differences between your lifestyles, not that he cared at all, but it didn’t stop him from understanding. The things that seemed slight to him could very well be enormous for you. He didn’t want to make you feel uncomfortable in any way, shape or form. 

Shit, on second thoughts maybe his restaurant was a bad idea… 

.

.

Seokjin was always punctual, he prided himself on it, but tonight it made him nervous. He’d said 7 but it had only just gone quarter to. He couldn’t very well stay in the car for fifteen minutes, you’d spot him out the window, so ever so slowly he opened his car door and stepped out, his heart thudding against his ribcage. He was sure he noticed his hand shaking as he closed it behind him. He was such a mess it was embarrassing. 

You lived in a nice little neighbourhood, it seemed quiet, and he admired your pots of flowers in the patch of garden you had as he made his way up the path that led to your front door. He took a deep breath before ringing the doorbell, adjusting his suit jacket as he waited for you to open up. It’s fine, Seokjin, he told himself. It’s just dinner. You’ve done much scarier things in your life. Pull yourself together, man. 

A few seconds later the door opened in front of him and you came into view, looking as beautiful as ever. I’m fucked, he thought immediately. 

“Hi,“ he forced himself to say as he smiled. He was probably staring but he couldn’t help himself. You looked stunning, your dress deep red in colour and incredibly flattering. His throat felt dry and he swallowed quickly. 

“Hey,” you greeted back. 

“You look beautiful,“ he couldn’t help but awe, hoping he wasn’t stepping out of line with his compliment. 

"Thank you,” you smiled almost shyly. It was adorable. “You look…really good.“ 

He couldn’t help but burst out laughing at that, aware the sound was probably highly unfaltering, but he couldn’t help it. "I’ll take it. Thanks.” He tilted his head to the right then, composing himself. “Are you ready to go? I’m a bit early, I know. Sorry about that." 

He really couldn’t tear himself away from your beauty, but luckily you didn’t seem to notice, busy nodding as you clutched your purse to your side. "I, uh… I would invite you in to kill time but my best friend’s embarrassing.” Your voice raised as you continued, your head turning slightly down the hallway. 

He raised an eyebrow, a little confused, but he guessed said best friend was in the house somewhere? He smiled and shook his head. “It’s fine.” 

As you stepped forward, a breath of a chuckle slipping from your throat, he moved to the side, outstretching his arm to let you lead the way. You accepted with a brief nod of your head, your gazes catching for a split second. God, you were gorgeous. 

His nerves might have eased a tad, but his heart was still beating just as fast – if not more.  

Written 2020 - 2021. Please refrain from posting my work elsewhere. No translations allowed. © floralseokjin 2021

[diaryofabeautyfiend]

Plain Gold Ring

(Part 2)

You left a few minutes before he did. He ran up to his place to change. The two of you had already showered together. You had meetings all day and so did he. You agreed to meet for lunch.

Your thoughts drifted to him all day. His strong hands and the spice of his skin were all you could think about. You should have felt guilty but you didn’t. You two really seemed like you connected on a deep and spiritual level. You told yourself not to be naive. Men who cheat never leave their wives. You were a means of escape for him. You decided to proceed as planned and move forward with your Chicago interview.

At lunch Andy came bounding into your office. Before you could even hand him his fork he had his hands on you. “I can’t focus. You’ve been in my head all day.”

“Me too.”

“Yeah? You thinking of my cock?”

“Your cock, your hands…fuck…your tongue.” He slipped his hand in your panties to find you already dripping.

“Shit, baby. I have to be inside of you. This is gonna be quick.” He slammed his hips into you a few times before you both completely lost it. He eased you back down peppering kisses on your neck and chest. You readjusted your panties, smoothed your hair and sat down at your desk to drink some water.

“Oh my goodness are you going to stay like that all day?”

“Like what?” You knew exactly what he was talking about. You just wanted to hear him say it.

“With my cum dripping out of you? Don’t you want to clean up?”

“I’m good.” You winked at him and handed him his lunch.

He chuckled, “There goes the rest of my day.”

You had easy conversation for the rest of lunch. You asked him about Jacob and how he seemed to be coping. He was happy to talk about it. It was evident he adored his son. And there went the guilt bubbling up again. He could see it in your face. “Is this weird for you?”

“A little. Maybe we shouldn’t do this.”

“We don’t have to talk about him.”

“It’s ok. I like hearing about your life. Besides I brought him up. I just want to be sure I’m not reading too much into this. Like we’re just friends who fuck right? I don’t know if I’m trying to catch feelings.”

He was a little offended but couldn’t express that to you. You had sex the second day that you had known each other. That was clearly not something he did nor did he take it lightly. He meant what he said. He really liked you. He would just have to work hard to show you how much. For now, he would follow your lead.

“Oh yeah. Of course. Friends who fuck sometimes. No feelings to catch.”

You went about the rest of your day and got home at a respectable hour. While you were at your mailbox in your building you noticed Lori and Jacob coming in. You smiled and turned quickly to get to the elevator. You realized a lot of people likely knew who they were and made it awkward like you just did. You just couldn’t leave well enough alone and went back to introduce yourself.

“Hi. I don’t mean to interrupt. Are you Lori Barber? My name is Y/N. I work with Andy.” She looked relieved to hear your name.

“Of course! Y/N. So nice to meet you. Andy told us all about you. This is our son Jacob.” He waved to you and you very awkwardly waved back.

“Well I won’t keep you. I just wanted to say hi.” She looked like she wanted to talk more but you hightailed it out of there up the stairs. You felt like an asshole. She looked like a perfectly nice person. If you weren’t fucking her husband you’d probably be friends. Damn it. You couldn’t do this with Andy. As much as you wanted to, knowing Lori was in the same building was too much for you.

That bottle of red on your counter was calling your name. You ordered dinner and prepped for your interview. Hopefully you’ll get a decent offer and out of here before you make a bigger mess.

——————————————————————

While you were in the bath Andy texted. You didn’t respond. While you watch tv he texted again. No text back. After the third unanswered text he called.

“Hey, Andy.”

“Are you ghosting me?” He sounded like he was joking but not really

“No. Just busy. What’s up?”

“Nothing. Too busy to see me?”

You wanted to say yes. Yes you were far too busy to spend time with a married man. You wanted to tell him go back to his wife. But you didn’t. “Of course not. I’ll unlock the door.” You were a goner.

A few minutes later you heard him calling your name. “Bedroom.” you called out. You had been crying about it all night but you have to end things before it gets serious. Even though you weren’t really dating and you said no feelings, you knew yourself. Under the facade of an overly ambitious lawyer you were a hopeless romantic. In the very short time you’ve known Andy he’s been a great guy. The fact remained, he was kind of your boss and very much married. You couldn’t continue.

“Hey. Are you crying? What’s wrong?” He sat on the bed and pulled you into his lap. You sobbed harder. “Y/n. Baby? Talk to me.”

“I met Lori and Jacob. He really has your eyes. We can’t do this, Andy. I know you and Lori are going through a rough patch but I can’t do this.” He was crestfallen. He rubbed your hand while you talked nodding where appropriate. When it was finally his turn to talk, he didn’t trust his voice to be strong.

“I know we just met, Y/N but, I’ve never cheated on Lori. Not ever. I slept with you because I liked you from the first moment we met. I know you said no feelings but, I feel like if you weren’t on the verge of caring, you wouldn’t be crying over me right now.” He was right. You felt all the things you weren’t supposed to feel.

You stayed up talking for a few more hours and ended up falling asleep in his arms. When you woke up the next morning he was gone. It was just as well. You got your notes together for your interview and called in.

The whole conversation was amazing. You and the managing partners really hit it off. They were younger than the partners at your current firm. A lot of women on the senior team. Not twenty minutes later did you friend text you to say they wanted you to take a trip out to Chicago.

When you got into the office you asked Caitlin to clear your schedule for the rest of the week and booked your flight. You were due in court so you grabbed your bag and badge and headed out.

——————————————————————

You were one of three attorneys on this case. Today was the voir dire so all you’d be doing was taking notes on possible jurors. One of the team members was unable to make it so Andy filled in. It was a pleasure watching him work. This part of the legal process was generally pretty boring. Watching him was like theater. You were fawning all over him like a school girl. It was frankly disgusting. At the end of the day Andy called a team meeting to compare notes and start working on court strategy.

You worked through dinner. All of you were exhausted by the end of the night. Since you were leaving the next morning, you handed your coworker Jeremy all of your notes and went to your office to pack up.

“Y/N, can you be in a little early tomorrow? I want to run through a couple of things.” Andy called from your doorway.

“Sorry. I’ll actually be in Chicago. Family emergency. I put it on your calendar this morning. Jeremy has all of my notes. I’ll be out of pocket for most of the trip. Shoot me an email if you need something. I’ll try to get back to you.”

He frowned and let out a deep sigh, “I’m sure I don’t need to tell you how important this case is. Can the trip be rescheduled?”

“I’m sorry. It can’t be. Jeremy is up to speed on everything. He’s done just as much leg work as I have on this case. You’re in good hands.” You patted him on the chest and excused yourself.

——————————————————————

Andy got home and grabbed a beer. Jacob was sitting at the table finishing some school work. “How is your new job, Dad?”

“Good. Everyone there is really nice.”

“Mom and I met Y/N at the mailboxes yesterday. She’s pretty.” Andy was surprised that Jacob even noticed you. He’s always staring at his phone.

“Yeah. She’s pretty.” He ruffled Jacob’s hair. “What are you working on?”

Lori came in to grab a water. She looked like she was running on the treadmill. She hadn’t found a good route around the neighborhood yet. “Hey. I didn’t hear you come in. We met your coworker. She was really sweet.”

“She’s the one who put you in touch with Linda Raymond.”

“Oh. That was nice of her. We should have her over for dinner. I remember when I was single I had nothing but wine and old Chinese in my fridge. I’m sure she’d like a home cooked meal.”

Andy was irritated with Lori’s assumption. “She’s a grown woman. I’m sure she feeds herself.” He knew you did because he’s been in your fridge.

“Well anyway. I’d like to thank her. I’ll send her a bottle of wine. Maybe you can ask her assistant what she likes.”

“She drinks Cabernet.”

He got up from the table and changed into his gym clothes. There was a really nice gym on the bottom floor of the building. He had every intention of going there but he couldn’t get you off of his mind. You mentioned all of your family lived down south. What kind of emergency could you have in Chicago. Maybe it was a guy. You didn’t mention one. He didn’t ask. He wouldn’t be surprised if you had a booty call in Chicago. You were distracted all evening texting someone. He pushed the button for your floor.

——————————————————————

Your flight was early so you started packing when you got home. Half way through your wine fueled solo dance party, Andy was at your door. You were a little tipsy and feeling bold so you answered wearing only a tshirt and panties.

“Evening, Andy.” You opened your arms to welcome him inside.

“Evening. Do you have a minute?”

“Sixty an hour, sir and they’re all for you.” He followed behind you to your bedroom.

“Are you drunk?”

“Not yet. But! The night is young.” He watched you dig through your closet selecting dresses and shoes. Nothing very casual.

“You sure do dress up for a family emergency.” You rolled your eyes at him.

“What do you want, Andy?”

“What’s in Chicago?”

“What’s with the questions?”

“Why are you answering my question with a question? Nothing more suspicious.” Fucking lawyers.

“What do you want, Andy? I won’t ask again.”

“You. I won’t see you for a few days and I’ll miss you. If you are going to see a guy, as I suspect by the amount of lingerie you’ve packed, I want you to remember how good you have it at home.”

Your cheeks heated and your cunt started paying attention. “So demanding, Mr. Barber.” You patted him on the head and attempted to walk away from him. He grabbed your hips and ran his hands under your tshirt over your bare belly. “Andy, we agreed.”

“No, you agreed. I did not. I still want you.” His index finger stroked the wet spot on your panties. “Looks like you still want me too.” Your eyes fluttered closed as you leaned into his touch. He nuzzled your clothed pussy nipped and sucked. His hand rubbed broad strokes over you before he pulled them down and began flicking his tongue over your clit. You let out a low moan of appreciation. “Want me to stop?”

“Andy…” He cupped your pussy and slipped in two fingers grinding the palm of his hand against your clit.

“What’s that, honey? Answer me. Do you want me to stop?” His body was pressed against yours.

“No. God no. But you have to. Your wife…”

“Don’t worry about her. Worry about yourself. Do you want me to stop? Tell me to stop.” he growled into your ear. He pressed his erection into your hip she continued finger fucking you.

Your head went blank and your pussy took over again. “Don’t stop. Please, Andy. Never stop fucking me.”

He spent the rest of the night squeezing every last ounce of pleasure from your body. You showered and ate a very late dinner after which you fell asleep watching a movie. This was a level of bliss you had never enjoyed in your whole life. You were falling in love with him. Fuck your stupid feelings.

Your very full bladder nudged you awake. As you slipped back into bed, Andy’s phone screen illuminated the very dark room. You went to turn it off and saw several missed calls and texts from Lori.

You felt like you were doing something horribly wrong. Not like you could see anything she said. You weren’t sure if you should wake him. But, what if it was an emergency? Something could be wrong with Jacob. You nudged his shoulder but he didn’t budge. This man slept like the dead.

“Andy? Wake up.” you whispered in his ear.

“Hmm? What’s wrong?”

“Lori keeps calling. I wasn’t sure if it was an emergency.”

He grumbled and scowled at the device. “It’s nothing. Go back to sleep.”

“It has to be something or else she wouldn’t have called you so many times.”

“I missed counseling tonight. She’s pissed.”

“Go home, Andy. I can get myself to the airport.”

“No. I’m with you tonight. She’ll have me the rest of the week. Come back to bed. Please, baby. I have to get my fill of you before you leave.”

You had a choice here. You could get back in that bed and spend the rest of the night with this beautiful man. You could feel happy and loved and ignore the fact that, two floors up Lori was likely pacing the floor. Or, you could tell him about Chicago and be done with this mess. You chose option B. It was going to hurt like hell but you had to rip off that bandage.

“What’s in Chicago is a position with a major firm. I’ve already had my first interview. They asked me to fly out for a few days. They’ll make me an offer and I’m going to accept.” He was silent. “Say something. Please.”

“I think I’m falling in love with you.” You smacked him in the face with your pillow. “Ow! Hey! What the fuck?! Stop it. Y/N stop! What the fuck is wrong with you?”

You were pissed and on the verge of tears. You switched on the bedside lamp and paced the floor mumbling to yourself. “We’ve only known each other for a couple of weeks. Fuck you. You aren’t falling for me. You’re in love with the fantasy that is our relationship.” You took his left hand and pointed to his wedding band, “As long as this is on your finger, you belong to Lori. You will never be mine. Go home, Andy. I’m going into that bathroom. When I come out, you need to be gone. Who the fuck says they’re falling for someone right before they get on a plane?! You’re almost guaranteeing it will crash.”

That stupid wedding ring. He never took it off. It must be graphed to his skin by now. You felt it when you held hands. It pressed into your breasts when he grabbed them. He was never aware of it but you always were. Painfully aware.

After a few minutes you heard your front door slam. You popped a nerve pill and got back in bed. Fuck Andy fucking Barber for being so perfect. Fuck your stupid pussy for getting you involved in the first place and fuck your stupid heart for feeling anything. You cried yourself to sleep.

——————————————————————

At six am Andy stood in his floor to ceiling window drinking his coffee. He saw you pacing the street waiting for your Uber that was five minutes late. The guy didn’t even take your bag. The car sped away taking his whole future with it.

He couldn’t fathom why you had such a soft spot for his wife. You had from the first time you met. You got her a job and went on a one woman crusade to save their marriage. He guessed you just felt like she had gone through enough. Andy hadn’t really forgiven her for almost killing them in that crash. She didn’t forgive him for his father’s involvement in Jacob’s acquittal. There was no going back. He filed for divorce the next day. Whether the two of you got together or not, he and Lori were done.

——————————————————————

When you got home you went to the mailbox first. You had a few magazines stacked on the table. You guessed no one wanted to steal your copy of Forbes. You saw Lori and smiled. Your earbuds were still blasting away so you didn’t immediately hear her talking.

“I’m so sorry. Did you say something?”

“It’s ok. I’m used to it with Jacob. I said I never got to thank you for passing on my information to Linda. I got the job.” (you already knew) “Anyway. I wanted to invite you for dinner sometime as a thank you.”

“I appreciate it. You really don’t have to.”

“Nonsense. I can use the company since Andy moved out.”

You dropped your things and cursed under your breath. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t know.”

“It’s ok. It was a long time coming. Let me know what works for you. I’m good anytime really.” She got onto the elevator and you stood in the lobby frozen.

You didn’t want to let Andy know you knew right away so you just sent him a quick message. “I’m back.” When you got back into your place your phone rang.

“Did you take the job?” He hadn’t even given you a chance to say hello.

“I did. They need me there in a month. Taking on a class action. I’ll wrap up what I can here and then I’m gone.”

“And I can’t convince you to stay.”

“It’s a really impressive offer. I can’t pass it up.”

“I filed for divorce.”

“I’m sorry to hear that.” (No you weren’t)

“So I have a month to make you fall in love with me.”

“Andy…”

“Can I come over?” Say no. End it. Absolutely not.

“Sure. No physical contact.”

“I’ll be a perfect gentleman.” Now if you could only say the same for yourself.

[sorry-i-ship-drarry]

I have a drabble request for you, no pressure ofcourse,

Basically either of them is gone for a long time for a mission or project , there is no chance for communication between them ,.. yes i am asking for a emotional reunion.

thank you

Thanks to smells like teen Spirit for putting me in the right mood for this fic..

1460 days

TW- ANGST | hurt comfort |

With the light's out it's less dangerous, it was better, it was nice, he could almost pretend draco was here with him. It was easier when he laid in an Empty bed he made yesterday, both the pillows still very intact but he couldn't pretend when the air didn't felt the same, when the warmth didn't flood him, when he didn't heard the soft humming, he couldn't pretend he didn't feel cold, he couldn't pretend that his heart felt like an empty box lying in an attic..

But it was easier to pretend because he told him to. He told him it would be easier if he just pretended that he wasn't alone but how could he not. How could he not feel like he wasn't alone ? He was so alone and all his head ran was the painted picture of draco getting on board the train and going away.

Harry sighed to himself before he left a quivering breath, it was Only day one, there were 1460 days more to go.

____________________________________

" its fine you know. I'm doing fine. But I hope you won't mind I wear a lot of your clothes, they smell nice. You might also need to buy a new cereal box, I ate it all, they're good. You were right. Yes I did the laundry, It was hard at first but I did it. And cooking,ugh, I'm still learning to make rogan josh like you do, it never tastes the same. But you know everything else is fine, I spend a lot of my time with teddy, he asks about you by the way and- and -"

But harry couldn't go on. He gulped down his beer again, watching Draco's Empty chair in front of him with a faint smile until that very faint smile turned into little sobs. He laughed at himself in tears but couldn't stop crying.

" I miss you but what do you know, you're just an empty chair " harry laughed again as if it was humorous but it perhaps seemed funny now since he'd be doing this for days, it cured his heart only for a little while, it did.

" 1300 more to go " harry laughed again and chugged the rest of his beer until he fell asleep right there on the couch.

___________________________________

" can you make those smiles uncle Draco used to make ?" Teddy asked as Harry took of his apron.

" of course " harry whispered before he took the chocolate syrup and made a smile upon teddy's pancakes just like Draco used to.

" when is he coming back uncle harry ?" He asked again. Only if the Little kid knew what it did to Harry's heart, if only he knew he was stabbing Harry's heart with the fork in his hand, if only he knew that his heart had started bleeding and was creating a pool, if only he knew that Harry was controlling his emotions, if only he knew, if only he knew.

" 1100 more days love " harry replied.

" you keep a count of each day ?" He asked innocently.

Harry smiled before he nodded.

" you must really love him " teddy said and digged into his pancakes.

Harry stared behind teddy as if Draco was standing there with a small painfully smiled smeared across his face until that hallucination of Draco vanished and harry was very much reminded of his absence.

_______________________________________

" how are you ?" Harry sniffed " I'm good, I just miss you a lot. It's our anniversary, do you remember ?You're good right ? Teddy grew a little too old you know. Everyone missed you at his birthday. Molly gave me this sweater with your initials on it. They're not as good as your sweaters but I like it. It reminds me that you're here with me. Can you try to come back sooner ? Please, it hurts. Everything feels empty, even me.. please " Harry cried as he wiped off his own tears fell upon their photo frame they got just before Draco left for mission.

But harry was past the phase where he could pretend anymore. He missed him so much that every nerve of him that ran from his head to his toe, it begged to feel alive again. He couldn't do this anymore, pretending to talk to him, his thing's, his own pictures. He was tired of it but it was all that remained of him and it was driving harry insane. He missed him every night he went to an empty bed, In every flower he puts in the vase, in everytime he cleans, in every time he watched TV alone, on every holiday, in every couple he saw on the road, in every time he made his special Friday breakfast, in every time he breathed his sweater, in every time he showered, in every time he looked at the sky, In every time he walked into an empty home, in everytime he stood under the freezing rain, in everytime he woke up and saw an empty bed, in every music he heard, in everytime he danced alone sadly to his favorite music, in everytime he watched their wedding tape, in everytime he saw their pictures together, in everytime he walked passed the Hyde park, in every lyrics he heard, he missed him in every breath he took and pretending didn't work anymore.

" 700 more days to go " harry Whispered to himself as he tried sleeping in those lonely nights yet again.

____________________________________

" what ?"

" I tried to get out of it if it's any consolation harry. I don't want to do this but I have to, I have no other option " Draco had said.

Harry huffed before he crossed his arms " for how long ?"

" 4 years " Draco replied softly.

" 4 years ? Are you crazy ! No, Draco, you can't..you simply can't " Harry threw his hands in the air aggressively.

" I'm sorry harry, I have to, I can't get out of it. I'm really really sorry " Draco tried to make harry understand as he pulled harry closer to him and wrapped his arms around him..

"but Draco it's 4 years with no contact, how am I going to survive?" Harry asked worried.

" like I will have to " Draco replied, nuzzling his face into Harry's neck.

Harry shook his head before he kissed Draco's eyes and let the news sink into them.

_________________

" you'll drop me off right ?" Draco asked finally.

" are you trying to wreck me ? I can't watch you go Draco. I can't do that " harry replied.

" oh "

" love. No..I want to drop you off but I simply can't look at you going away. The thought of you going away alone wrecks me, it pains me and to watch you go away , I can't do that draco. I can't. I'm sorry love but I can't " harry replied.

" I'd liked if you would've came " Draco replied shrugging, his eyes brimmed with the usual tears like those of harry's.

Harry released a quivering breath before he stood up from the bed and paced to Draco and wrapped his arms around his torso, kissing the top of his head " then I will "

Harry Hummed to himself in low mummers his favourite song reminiscing Draco going away.

" but he's been gone for so long ?" Ron had asked

Harry only shook his head as he walked away. Nobody understood what it felt like. He felt lonely thinking of how only in this whole wide world Draco knew what was it like to have your love gone away for years you can grow so much in. People only assumed he must've adapted to living alone, adapted to not having talked to your lover, adapted of the normal moving life but there wasn't a day went by when Harry didn't miss the gallon out of him. He missed him too much and he Only wished people Would've understood.

He hummed again as he looked down at his lap to see the watch Striking day " 360 "

" I'll see you soon Draco, I'll see you soon " harry mummered to himself as he shut his eyes again in restless sleep but slept knowing he was going to see him soon, very soon.

_______________________________________

He looked at himself in the mirror, Patting his cheeks with shaky hands, wiping away the tears that didn't seem to stop. He breathed out a heavy quivery breath, rubbing his hands together, sniffing before he moved away from the mirror, picked up his trench coat and with much difficulty left the grey like house.

Harry Whispered incoherent words to himself all way long, practicing his smile, his speech, his movements for when he'd finally see Draco again. He practiced it all way long, even checking his breath until he reached the station and Draco hadn't Returned.

" he didn't return ? What do you mean he didn't return ?" Harry screamed at one of the crew members, his heart in a villains hand who kept plunging dagger into it over and over again.

" I- I- I don't know " the man stammered in fear and stumbled away running from harry.

Harry collapsed onto the ground, crying Loudly with a little care in the world of people watching him. Draco didn't return, he didn't..

Harry had prepared himself for everything, even to Draco forgetting him but the thought of never seeing Draco, he never prepared himself for that simply because he had too much faith but when he didn't step down from even the last of the trains, he cried like he never had before, his throat going sore from all the screaming, his eyes hurting with the unstoppable tears.

" harry, let's go, honey, let go " he heard faintly before someone helped his numb self up and walked him to the car. He doesn't even remember when he stopped crying and fell into numbness, he doesn't even remember how long he had been at the station or how what time or day it was, he didn't care. Draco hadn't came back and harry wasn't ready for it.

" he'll be fine Harry. Don't worry " it seemed like Hermione but harry cared lesser and lesser as his head thumped against the car window and he started crying again in silent tears.

He doesn't even remember when they reached his place and gave him food to eat, he didn't care, and he doesn't even want to..

" harry please" they begged but harry got up numbly from the chair and locked himself into the bedroom, sliding down the door and crying in lost Years, memories, in reminiscent of how Little time they had until he suddenly he heard soft whispers from against the door.

" love, harry "

But harry ignored thinking it was his mind playing tricks.

" its really me, I'm back "

Harry looked around the room looking for any signs of faint hallucinations but when he heard the breathing from other side of the door he stood up with a jerk, unlocking the door and his breath choked in his throat as he saw a very real Draco standing there with open arms and harry collapsed into Draco with so much force that they fell over the ground and he cried.

" I'm back love, everything is going to be fine, it's alright " he Whispered faintly as his voice broke too..

But harry only cried Loudly, in his chest, wetting the clothes Draco had been wearing. He didn't care the fact that they were still on the ground or that they were Lying before the bedroom door or that the cold air was sweeping in because of the open door, he only cared about those arms that wrapped around him, that smell, those hands, those body, him. He only cared about him.

" I thought I lost you " harry finally Whispered in sobs.

"I know. I'm sorry dear but I'm back and I'm never going away, ever. I promise " he too cried as he ran his hands through Harry's hair again.

" I missed you " Harry cried hugging him tighter.

But this time Draco couldn't respond and he cried more harshly, nuzzling his head into Harry's shoulder.

" I love you Harry, I'm never putting you through his pain again. Ever.. I'm sorry "

"you better not " Harry cried..

" I love you Draco. I love you so much " harry lastly said and he didn't spoke anything else, letting Draco take care of him in those tender arms, telling him everything was fine. He missed him.

The ignored clock on Harry's Wrist halted at the number zero and it never moved again.

Thank you @drarrywords for helping me through this..

300 follower's appreciation dialogue prompt requests open

Angst prompts request open

[tomtenadia]

A Little Braver - Chapter 2

I think I will be brave as well and post chapter 2.

In the chapter when Rowan muses about his call sign he uses the term FNG - it literally mean Fucking new guy. In US military it describes a newcomer.

Enjoy the chapter!

--------

The next morning Rowan was on his way to the fire station. He had left the house a bit early to allow for traffic or getting lost. In the end he had arrived with ten minutes to spare. He parked the car along the road and walked to the main area in front of the station and stopped. 

The tall training building was on fire and a few people were outside in front of it as if in waiting. He searched for the captain but she was not there. He wanted to go and ask to the team about her whereabouts but did not want to interrupt the training session. So he just decided to lean against a wall of the fire station, arms folded at his chest and just watch the drill. 

He was curious about why they were not using the truck or water and wondered if they were following a specific exercise.

Being a fighter pilot was full of risks but by looking at the raging fire and thinking that there were people willingly putting themselves through that inferno made him shiver. He’d rather been strapped in a metal cage than in a house on fire.

All of a sudden a figure ran out of the building carrying what looked like a dummy and two more followed.  He gasped when he recognised the captain. The dummy she was carrying on her shoulders must have weighed a ton and he was impressed. He followed her, dumping the dummy on the ground and joining the tall blonde man and pat him on the shoulder looking happy. His lips turned up in a hint of a smile.

Her eyes met his and she gave him a huge smile and Rowan straightened up and pulled away from the wall. She walked to him while unbuttoning her bulky fireproof jacket.

“Morning Captain,” she brushed her hair away from her face and Rowan’s heart started to race.

“Enjoyed the show?”

He cleared his voice while he tried to gain some sense again “That was fascinating.”

“Can you give me twenty minutes to have a very quick shower and get changed? You don’t want to be in a meeting with a stinky woman.”

Captain Whitethorn nodded “Take your time.”

“You can go and meet the guys. They are a friendly bunch.” She offered “just ignore the lewd jokes.”

“Thank you for the head’s up.”

Aelin ran away and he gathered some courage and walked to the team. He was not the best around people he did not know, but he wanted to play nice.

He took another step and the tall blond man noticed him and walked with purpose toward him and offered him his hand “Captain Whitethorn isn’t it?”

Rowan nodded.

“Aelin told us you were coming. I am Lieutenant Ashryver.”

Rowan nodded and studied the man in front of him and noticed that his posture and attitude screamed military. After he had spent all his adult life in the force he had gotten used to spot one of them. He had the same feeling at the base during the fire. 

“Can I introduce you to our team?”

“Gladly.”

Aedion turned to the red-haired woman “Ladies first. This is Ansel. Never leave her and Aelin alone because then you are in trouble.”

“Hey, I’ll tell her you said that and she will put you on truck cleaning duties for a month.” Aedion ignored her and continued “then here we have Brullo, Nox, Ress, Ren and finally Luca.” He grabbed the young man’s shoulder “he is our probie. He finished the academy and he joined us a few months ago. For now he is coming to the less serious calls but we are planning on coddling him a bit less and make him see the real stuff as well.”

Then the man turned around, scanning the area in search for something or someone “we also have two EMTs, Elide and Lysandra but they must be around the station doing something. You will meet them anyway.”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you all.”

“Everyone, clean up and don’t leave everything to Luca. All of you haul ass. Nox, Ren you are on equipment duty. Ansel, Ress you two are on uniform checks. Brullo, take Luca with you and go over him some truck procedures for before and after calls. Now away all of you.”

Rowan chuckled. The man was definitely ex military. 

“Where did you serve?” He asked the man taking a chance.

“I was in the army. I was an artillery specialist. Once I retired Aelin called me saying her station was looking for recruits and I applied for the job. Guess my experience with explosives and such was a plus. Many years later I am still here and still loving it.” Then he studied the Captain “how did you guess?”

“Your posture. It’s the stick up your arse, as Captain Galathynius would say, that gets drilled into you from day one. The way you give order, again, very familiar.”

“Call her Aelin, Cap or Captain. She hates being called Captain Galathynius.”

Rowan raised a eyebrow with curiosity for that statement.

“I usually call her brat or menace.” Aedion chuckled “she is my cousin. I have known her since we were little. I have earned that privilege.”

Aedion started walking back into the station and Captain Whitethorn followed him.

“She has the bas habit of not filtering what she wants to say, can be brash and very vocal when she is mad at something or someone, but she loves her job and her team. She loves being a firefighter. She might be young be she is extremely capable. She is the first female captain. Absurd to think that before her it was just a boy’s club, eh?” The man joked, and lead him into a big spacious room with a lone table and chair and a kitchen at the bottom of it “If she keeps likes this I can see her climbing up the ladder pretty quickly, although I cannot imagine her in a desk job.”

Rowan knew very little about the woman but he had the same feeling.

“This is where we spend most of the time when we are on shift, all tasks are done and just wait for a call. We have books, video-games, tv… you name it. And like all families we fight for who controls the remote.”

Aelin joined them a moment later “Are you giving our Captain the tour?”

“Yes, just the cheap tour for now. You can give him the proper one later.” Aedion winked at her.

“I guess that after our meeting, the Captain will be more than happy to get rid of me.

“I gave you a tour of the base, I would love a tour of the station.”

Aelin’s mouth almost fell open in disbelief.

“If you are not fed up with me we can think about it.” And she turned around and walked away the same way he did the day before. 

Aedion gestured with his head to follow her and Rowan ran after her.

“I am sorry for the delay. Once I got back to work yesterday I had an email saying that our annual performance review is due in three weeks. I did not have a way to contact you otherwise I would have pushed the meeting forward a bit.”

“It was actually interesting watching you guys train.” He followed her to her office and took the seat she offered “we have performance reviews as well. What do you guys have to do?”

Aelin was caught off guard by him being talkative all of a sudden “We get tested on our abilities. We usually go to the academy, are given a scenario and the whole team has to work as if that was a real call. We also get to perform some individual tasks and those are timed. It’s a very stressful period.”

“You can leave our project to me until you are done with your review. I am happy to give you an update and you can come once a week to check how things are progressing if you are too busy.”

“Are you trying to get rid of me, Captain?” She smiled at him, leaning back in her chair.

He shook his head and she noticed him finally relaxing and sitting more comfortably in his chair “we have those review as well and they are always stressful for the team and I am aware how much of my time, preparing drills takes me. I am offering you to concentrate on your mission ahead for now and then catch up in three weeks.”

Was he actually being nice to her?

“I will be fine captain, but thank you for the offer. I appreciate it.”

“If you change your mind, my offer will still be on the table.”

“So,” she said quite abruptly changing the subject. If he even thought she needed his help because she was a woman he was in for a tough ride.

Aelin grabbed a folder with her plan. She had spent the entire previous day working on it. “These are the copies for you.” And she passed him a pile of papers “they are the ideas and changes I would like to suggest. I believe that is the part you will have to discuss with your CO. the biggest and probably most time consuming change is the extra door. All the other suggestions are repairs and perhaps replacements of old parts. I would like to explain again that these changes are not up for discussion. They need to happen.”

Captain Whitethorn nodded “I have discussed the matter with my CO after our meeting and he understands that and agrees. He promised me that he will fight until the last ditch if they start blocking him with budget bullshit, his exact words.”

“Please tell Air Commodore Salvaterre that I appreciate his cooperation. It goes in the interest of every single person who works at the base. Him included.”

“This pile here is a draft of possible training sessions for both your squadron and the ground crew. I want basic fire prevention training, fire extinguisher training, reviews of fire drills. I would like to do some training, especially with the ground crew on fuels handling, fuel storing and clearing spillages. Your squadron will be welcome as well. I think it will benefit everyone.” She flipped through her notes “I would like to nominate a couple of people as Fire champions or any other name we can come up with. Their role would be to perform monthly deep inspections and weekly spot checks. The idea is that by doing this, you are always on the ball with any problems. Of course we will provide training on how to do all this.” She kept explaining and the man in front of her listened to her with great interest, never interrupting her. 

“Needless to say that fire prevention is everyone’s job. See it, report it. And if you can, fix it.” She jotted down a few things “of course all of this depends on our rosters. I don’t know how it works for you guys but we work in shift patterns.”

“My squadron and I, we work Monday to Friday when we are ground-side. Ground staff such as engineers for example, they tend to follow shift patterns as well. I can talk to the supervisors for the mechanics and engineering team and see if I can get a roster from them. They are aware of the fact that extra training is on its way.”

“Please do. I have a feeling that will be the biggest job.”

“Do you have any questions for me so far?”

“Which venue will we use?”

Aelin tapped her pen on the table “I was thinking here if it’s okay with you. We have the equipment, also we don’t have maximum security checks.”

“Speaking of security…” he extracted something from his pocket “`I have your badge.”

Aelin took the badge he offered in surprise.

“I imagine we will be working together quite a lot and you will need to visit the base as well on a regular basis. You have now the badge with consultant clearance. It’s not a lot, but it will grant you access to all the are you will need. And no more forms to fill.”

“Thank you, captain,” she was speechless “Thank you for trusting me.”

She smiled fondly at him and Rowan realised he’d do literally anything to see that smile. It was intoxicating.

They worked for a few hours and Aelin realised it was not as bad as she had feared. The captain had been very keen to listen to her plans and making suggestions according to his knowledge of the base and his team. He had also looked a bit less uncomfortable and more willing to have a full conversation instead of monosyllables. At least it was progress and since it looked like they were going to work together for a while it was a good thing. 

When her stomach grumbled loudly she coughed embarrassed to try and cover it but the very faint hint of a grin on the captain’s lips told her that he had head her.

“We can stop for lunch, captain.”

Aelin almost blushed “I guess so. I think I have a black hole forming in my stomach. Those drills always leave me famished.” She stood “there is a lovely diner very nearby. Can I interest you in lunch? It’s on me. But no shop talk.” She was ready for a refusal but the captain stood and nodded.

“I’d like lunch.”

When they left the office they met Elide and Lysandra carrying boxes full of supplies to stock the ambulance. As soon as Rowan noticed he jumped forward and offered to help Elide.

“Let me carry them. They are quite bulky.”

“Thank you,” said the woman flashing a smile to Aelin then showed the captain the direction to the ambulance.

“Where do I place it?” He asked once they were arrived. Elide opened the back door of the vehicle “just here. Lys and I will sort through everything. Thank for the help.”

Lysandra dropped all her stuff and turned to the two captains.

“These are Lysandra and Elide, they are our two resident EMTs.”

“Ladies, this is captain Whitethorn.”

Lysandra mouthed hot to Aelin and the woman rolled her eyes. 

“The captain and I were going for lunch. Could you please tell Aedion to man the fort for me while I am away? I am just going to Emrys and I have a radio with me if anything happens.”

The woman nodded “I know the drill. Go, enjoy lunch.”

The two captains left “we are walking. The place is just down the road. We are all regulars there.”

Five minutes later they reached the small diner and Rowan thought the place looked cosy and felt like the good old fashioned family run restaurant.

“Emrys and his husband Malakai have been running this place since forever. It’s an institution in the neighbourhood.”

“Aelin, my girl.” A very smiling Emrys walked from behind the counter and went to hug the woman “Are you keeping well?”

“Of course.”

“Two today?” He asked looking at the Aelin’s companion.

“Yes please. Can we sit anywhere?”

“Go ahead.” He gestured pointing at the tables.

“Quiet today?”

“Not at all. You just missed the rush. Until twenty minutes ago we were full. Malkai is delivering an order to the police station.”

Aelin walked to the table near the window and invited Rowan to join her.

“Here’s the menu for your friend. Let me know when you are ready to order.”

Rowan took the menu, opened it and lowered his head to start reading it.

Aelin studied him for a moment while he was distracted. Stared at his hands and noticed the hint of a tattoo sneaking from underneath the uniform. Interesting, she would have never pinned the man as someone who would have a tattoo. A smile tugged at her lips. A part of her wanted quite badly to get to know him a bit more. “Your hair,” she asked “has it always been silver or it became like that with age?” Then she stopped embarrassed “I mean I am not saying that you look old. I just meant as if it got like that as you grew up.”

He lifted his head from the menu and his piercing green eyes settled on her “I was born like this. Apparently it runs in my family.”

“I am sorry, I didn’t mean to pry. I was just curious.”

He gave her a half a smile. It did not linger. It was quick and for a second she thought she had imagined it “I am used to it.” He tapped on the plastic menu “you haven’t decided yet?”

“Oh no, I don’t need a menu. I know it by heart and I know what I want.”

Emrys came back and both placed their orders and Aelin enjoyed the shocked expression on the captain.

“You can’t possibly eat all that stuff.”

“Watch me.”

The silence grew uncomfortable again. It looked as if he was chatty only when it came to work.

“Why did you join the airforce?”

For a moment he looked stunned at her question “I was eighteen and fresh out of high school. Happy I was done studying. My parents wanted me to go to uni, but the idea of spending four more years on books was not for me.” He explained and noticed she had he hands folded under her chin “One day I met Lorcan. We knew each other from before already, being both from Wendlyn and all. It was nice to see a friendly face in a new place. Anyway, he told me he had moved here to Terrasen with the TAF. He told me they were recruiting and I went to the base during an open day. The day after I had signed up and a month later I was starting pilot academy.”

“Where in Wendlyn?”

“Doranelle.”

“I was there once. On holiday with…” no, not time yet “with a friend. We loved it very much.”

He nodded “It’s a nice place, but I must admit that after so many years I feel like an adopted citizen of Terrasen. Orynth is quite a gorgeous place.”

Emrys came with their food and Rowan noticed how skilfully placed all the plates on the table. As if he was used to have all those orders from her.

“You can’t be serious and actually eat all this food.”

Aelin tackled her first plate “watch the pro at work, captain.” She gave him a smile and Rowan shook his head and tackled his food.

“Why firefighter?”

He noticed her still for a second and the happiness wash away from her face in an instant. Fuck. Wrong question already.

“I was eight.” She said playing with her food for a moment “I was out playing with some of my friends. I was on my way home when I saw two massive fire trucks in front of my house and my home on fire.” She placed the fork on the plate “I ran toward the house but this fireman stopped me. I was crying and calling for my parents. He hugged me, he told me they were working to try and save my parents. I remember trashing in his arms to get free but he held me tight.” She took a bit to keep herself busy while telling the story “he took me to the back of the engine and showed me some of the tools and explained to me how the engine worked. He distracted me while his colleagues worked to stop the fire and save my parents.” She finally met his gaze “it took them almost two hours to kill the fire. After that there was nothing left of the house and of my life. My parents had been found dead in the house. The gas boiler has suffered a fault and basically exploded. They stood no chance.”

“Aelin I am…” his hand moved slowly closer to hers and brushed it gently “I am so sorry.”

“When I grew up I decided I wanted to be like the firemen who attended my fire. I wanted to rush into a house on fire and try to save some person’s parents of spouse and help them avoid the loss I suffered. I wanted to be like the man who stood with me and distracted me.”

Her finger lifted a little and met his almost in acknowledgement “Aedion’s family took me in. As soon as I finished high school I was like you. I had no interest in uni. So I signed up for the fire academy.”

“Sorry for ruining lunch.”

She shook her head and flicked his finger playfully. That had been the first contact between them. He had always kept his distance and that little flicker of affection made he heart flutter. The man was a puzzle. He could go from stone cold bastard to this in a small amount of time.

Aelin finished her food and noticed the captain staring at her with curiosity.

“I cannot believe it.”

“Told you,” she smiled at him with a smug expression “and I am even going to get cake.”

“No you are not.”

In defiance she stood and went to the counter and ordered chocolate hazelnut cake from Emrys. She came back and sat down again and ate the whole slice.

“Remind me to apply for a mortgage if I ever take you out for dinner.” At those words Rowan froze. He did not mean to do say that. It was supposed to be a joke but he should have learned by now that he was bad at making jokes.

“I’ll keep that in mind, Iceman.”

His head shoot up and looked at her. She had used his callsign. Something that only his squadron members would ever use. They all had one. It was a tradition. But it also meant something. It was always the other pilots in the team who choose the callsign. Never the pilot himself. It was a rite of passage that welcome you in the squadron. In a family. He got his one because of his hair. Everyone thought it was because he was cool and calm under pressure but no. When he was still one of the FNG he went through his naming ceremony like all the others FNG and they had decided he was going to be iceman because with his hair he reminded them of a creature from the snowy glaciers of the Staghorn mountains, hence iceman. Hearing her calling him like that made his heart skip a beat.

“We don’t have call signs. We got nicknames but nothing official like you guys.” She polished the plate from the chocolate left from the cake “the guys usually call me Captain or Cap. Aedion is the worst. Because he is my cousin he takes the liberty to call me brat or menace. I should really write him up for insubordination.”

She tapped his hand “come on grampa, let’s get back to work.” And stood. Rowan had wanted to grab that hand and hold it for a moment. It felt as if a small shift had happened in their weird work relationship.

Aelin paid for the meal as promised and they walked back to the station “are you sure you will be able to concentrate with all that food in you?”

On the way back Aelin looked up at the sky and noticed a few flakes that had started to follow. “Looks like it’s going to snow.”

She turned her head and caught Rowan sniffing the air, the eyes closed and a relaxed expression. The hard lines of his face had disappeared and the faint smile on his lips changed him completely. Yes, the man was hot but there was more to it. The very rare times that his face softened his eyes lit up as well turning a deeper green and made him stunning. She had a feeling those moments were rare and was glad that she had caught at least a couple. Like right now, his body relaxed enjoying the first flakes of snow. That was a precious insight in the man at her side.

“You like winter?” She broke the magic.

His eyes snapped open and his face turned hard again as if he hated being caught enjoying something.

“I do.” He said softly “I love the snow and winters in Terrasen are incredible.

Aelin smiled. His scent. His scent reminded her of Terrasen. Pine and snow. She had smelled it the other day while she was inside his plane and he was quite close to her. He smelled like winter and realised for a second that the nickname Iceman was perfect as well for that reason and not just because he could be a cold hearted bastard. They got back to the station and she found it quiet apart from Brullo and Luca near the fire engine. Apparently the man was explaining the youngster some of the routine checks they performed. He was their resident engineer and mechanic so he was the best one for that type of training.

“Nice lunch, Cap? Did you eat all the food at Emrys?”

“The vegetables are still there. They are safe.” Aelin turned when noticed that the joke came from Rowan.

Brullo and Luca burst out laughing “oh he is good.” Added the older man.

“My eating habits are the joke of the station.”

“Cap, they are insane.” Added Luca.

Aelin turned to Rowan and he lifted and eyebrow as if to say I agree with them.

She turned again on her colleagues “one more joke from the two of you and I’ll have you scrub the station from top to bottom with a toothbrush.” Then she turned on her feet and walked away to her office. 

Rowan tapped his hat in salute to the two men and followed her. He found her in the kitchen making coffee “Do you drink coffee?”

“I don’t think I could function without it.”

“Good. We basically drink it by the litre. It keeps you alive on a night shifts.”

She made some coffee and offered him a mug “milk, sugar?”

“Black, thank you.”

He watched her as she dropped two spoonfuls of sugar in it “All this sugar is not good for you.”

“Shhh you heathen.”

He rolled his eyes and took a sip of his coffee “Thank you for lunch by the way.”

“My treat, for working with me.” She apologised, while leaning against the counter and drinking her coffee.

“You are not as bad as I thought. I agree with Aedion, you are a brat and a menace but I can work with that.” Bad idea. Rowan noticed anger flash in her eyes.

“I am not having you calling me that.” She slammed the cup on the counter “you barely know me and I have been professional, sure if cracking a joke or two makes me a brat it’s your problem you need sense of humour. I have been busting my ass to fix the shit that went down in your station.” She took a step toward him and Rowan braced himself “I know how I run my station. I am aware of every single problem or fault that happens here. Your fucking hangar went down in a blaze of glory and you had no idea of the shitstorm about to happen.” She was now a few mere centimetres from his face and a foolish part of him wanted to push her against the counter and kiss her senseless. She was mad at him and all he thought was how her lips would feel. What was wrong with him?

“Don’t ever call me that again with that smug face of your because I have no problems removing that smirk with a punch.”

Rowan kept staring at her in silence, not risking saying a word while she was that mad at him. Damn the woman had fire in her. And it did not matter he was getting a well deserved lashing down from her, he could not stop thinking that she was beautiful. Not just physically, she was fierce, brave and passionate and he was irremediably drawn to her.

Which it was totally crazy since they had met the day before.

“Now get the fuck out of my station. We are done for today.” And she stepped back.

“Captain, I did not mean to offend you.”

“I said out.” She repeated through gritted teeth “I have your contact. I will let you know when I am in the mood to meet you again.” She grabbed her coffee and walked away from him.

Rowan stood still and stared at the spot where she had been. He ran a hand through his hair and cursed himself for his stupidity. They had finally set aside the bad start they had, and messed up everything again.

He picked up his cap on the counter and then realised he had left all the documents in her office. He was about to walk to her but then changed his mind bad idea. So he just left the station, got back to his car and drove back to the base.

Aelin was furious. Why did he have to go and ruin everything with his bloody mouth of his?

That beautiful mouth of his.

She paced the office for ten minutes then she left, went to changing room and changed into her training gear. Some exercise will do her good to clear her head.

Aedion found her twenty minutes later “here you are,” he shouted as she ran back and forth in the yard with a dummy on her shoulders.

“Aelin!” He shouted when she did not stop. When she ignored him again he went in front of her and stopped her “Aelin.”

“What?” She growled dropping the dummy on the ground with a loud thump. She was breathless.

“I thought you were with the captain.”

She ignored him and grabbed the dummy again but Aedion stopped her and grabbed her hand “did something happened?”

“Yes, he happened. He is an arsehole and I don’t know why I am bothering to help him.”

“Because it’s your job.”

“Well, he can go and ask west station for all I care.”

Aedion shook his head “they are in our territory.”

Aelin ran a hand through her hair.

“Did he do something to you? Because if he did I am very good at hand to hand combat. I’ll destroy his stiff arse.”

Aelin chuckled. Aedion had always been very protective with her.

“He called me a brat and a menace. He said that I am not as bad as he thought and that he agrees with you for my nicknames.”

Aedion laughed “that’s why you are mad at him? Ace, I love you but you can be both.”

She sat down on the dummy “I know. But if you say it it doesn’t bother me. We grew up together. You know me better than anyone. He instead…” she punched the dummy’s face “he had this smug face and he used this tone like a condescending prick.”

She groaned “you can be a brat and a menace but I can work with it,” she repeated in a mocking tone “I am the one doing him a favour to help him. Idiot.”

“You just want to find an excuse to hate him and push him away from you.” He sat down on the dummy beside her “Ace, could it be that you like him but you are still too scared to allow another man in your life?”

“No. I have known the guy for two days. And no, I do not like him.” She protested.

“Would it be that bad?”

Aelin stood and faced him “I am not interested in getting any closer to him than what works dictates. Lie. Lie. Lie. Lie.

“You are overreacting and you are behaving like a brat and proving him right.”

She pushed him off the dummy “you are on truck duty for the whole week.” Aelin grabbed the dummy and went back to her training.

Rowan finally made it back to the base and went straight to his office but Lorcan intercepted him.

“You are back early. I thought you were going to be at the station all afternoon.”

Rowan ignored his CO and plopped on his chair and closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

“That bad, eh?” Joked Lorcan at the man’s reaction.

“I opened my damn mouth. That’s what I did.”

Lorcan sat on the chair on the opposite side of the desk “What did you do? I thought you were the guy who counted till ten before opening his mouth. That’s why I gave you this assignment. I need this to go smoothly and fix all the shit that the old CO messed up. If I wanted to piss off the TFD’s captain I would have sent Moonbeam.”

Rowan snorted “probably would have been better. Far more charming than this cranky old bastard.”

“I have seen the woman. Fenrys would end up fucking everything. Literally.”

Lorcan sat back relaxed “I am coming to the station tomorrow and I will talk to her and bring her back into our good books.”

“You?” Rowan scoffed “if there is someone who has a worse temper than me is you, Lorcan.”

“I’ll be my charming self.” The man joked.

“The gods save us all.” Rowan joked standing and pacing the office “trying to scare her will not work either.”

“I noticed that. I wish some of our men would have that level of balls. Quite amazing for a woman.” Rowan’s head snapped at his CO’s words.

“Don’t even dare say anything like that in her face or you are a dead man.”

He and Lorcan would go along on most of the days but on some concepts, Lorcan still followed the good old fashioned ideas that for example females were not suited for the military, a topic they had many fights on. Rowan had tried to open up the ranks to a few more females in the squadron but Lorcan had rejected the idea every single time.

“You know how I feel about those things.”

“Yes, our very progressive man. Equality and all.”

“You can be such an arsehole.” Rowan stopped at the window “even the Navy is accepting women. Their recruitment for female officers is up by 40%. We are still to celebrate when we will have our first female officer.”

Lorcan growled “well, then move to the Navy.” He stood annoyed “flying a jet is not like service on an aircraft carrier!”

Rowan turned furious “you are not seriously telling me that you don’t believe a woman could fly a jet.” He slammed his fist on the table “I have seen Aelin in action and during drills. I have seen her jump into a building on fire without any second thought to save one of our men. I have seen her drag a dummy twice her size off a burning building while wearing the fire suit and an oxygen tank on her shoulder. She could probably do a vertical, pull 9G and then get off the plane and have a dance in our face. She is definitely not the fragile thing you think she is just because she is a woman.”

“What is your point?”

“Stop being a misogynist prick.”

Rowan phone went off and Lorcan moved away “if you are coming tomorrow, you leave that attitude behind.” Lorcan left and Rowan took the call. Once he was done he sat back down on his chair and looked outside noticing the snow falling and a gentle smile tugged his lips at the memory of the moment they had shared at the restaurant. He had to apologise. And quickly.

TAG:

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[elliesguitarstrings]

Silence (Part 1/Prologue)

Peter Parker x stark!reader

Summary: You and Peter have been best friends ever since he stepped foot into the avengers compound. After a year of being friends you realize you’ve developed a crush on him, but he doesn’t feel the same way... at least, you don’t think he does.

A/N: This is my first ever post so idk how many people will see it but if you do feel free to send in any requests for Tom Holland or any of his characters and tell me if you like this story - part 2 coming soon!

Warnings: language, awkwardness, a little bit of fluff

italics mean flashbacks

~~~~~~~~

Today was a special day. Well, to you that is. To everyone else, it was just a normal Saturday. But to you, and hopefully to Peter too, it was special.

Today marks one year of you and Peter first meeting. One year since he walked through the glass elevator doors of the Avengers Compound. One year since you met your best friend. You remember it like it was yesterday.

Waking you up from a deep sleep, you hear a loud knock on your door, one you recognized only to be your dad’s.

He opens the door and peeks his head in.

“Hey, get up and come into the living room. There’s someone I want you to meet.”

Barely awake, you respond, “No, let me sleep. It’s too early for this shit.”

“Watch your language young lady! Now get your ass out of bed and be out in ten minutes.”

He walks away, not even bothering to close the door.

You groan into your pillow and proceed to throw it across the room as you reluctantly get out of bed.

Lately you’ve been fed up with everyone in the compound, and you’re taking out all your anger on them. But what else are you supposed to do? Everyone treats you like a kid, but they still expect you to act like an adult. They don’t let you go on missions, but they still make you train. They don’t let you go to actual school, but they make you study twice as hard. Everyone is just so hard on you, especially your dad, and you’re fucking done with it.

You walk into the bathroom and pull your hair up into a quick ponytail, not bothering to brush your mess of hair. Hastily, you brush your teeth and splash some water on your face in an attempt to make yourself look somewhat alive, but the dark circles are still extremely noticeable. You walk back into your bedroom and think about changing out of your hoodie and shorts, but you decide against it. You look halfway decent, and whoever it is that your dad wants you to meet certainly can’t be so important that you have to change into something nice.

After a quick look in the mirror, you slowly make your way into the living room, dreading the coming interaction with another one of your dad’s boring co-workers.

However, when you look up and see a teenage boy sitting next to your dad on the sofa, your mood changes.

Your dad stands up and turns to you, gesturing at the boy.

“Y/N, this is Peter Parker, Spiderman, whatever you want to call him. He’s the newest addition to the team, and he’s moving into the compound in a few days. He’s the same age as you, so I thought you should show him around. So be nice.”

Peter blushes and smiles, giving you a small wave.

Suddenly you regret not changing.

He’s cute. So fucking cute. He has fluffy brown hair, brown puppy dog eyes, the cutest smile, and he’s your age. Your age. Everything about him is perfect.

Realizing that you have been staring for probably a little to long, you speak up.

“Um, hi Peter, I’m Y/N. Uh, it’s- it’s nice to have you here. Sorry I look like shit.”

“Oh, um, thanks.” Peter responds, just as awkwardly as you.

“You don’t look like shit by the way,” he adds, “you look pretty.”

You smile, about to say thank you when your dad interrupts.

“Well, that was really fucking awkward, but I think you two are going to get along just fine. I’ll leave you two lovebirds to it then, see ya around.”

He winks at you as he leaves to go to his lab, and you roll your eyes in return, mentally hitting yourself at how embarrassing this whole interaction has been so far.

You turn to Peter, “So, uh, why don’t I show you around and you can meet everyone.”

“Sounds good to me!” he smiles.

You start in the kitchen and show him around the compound: the movie room, the game room, the pool, the sun room, the training room, the labs, and the bedrooms, introducing him to all of the Avengers along the way. Finally, you stop at the largest spare bedroom, which happens to be right across from yours.

“This is probably gonna be your room. No one really uses it right now but since it’s the biggest one I thought you might want it.”

“Oh, um, thanks, but even the smallest room here is like ten times bigger than my room, so I’d be happy with anything. But since it’s across from you, I’ll take it.”

You blush, not sure if he’s flirting with you or just trying to be nice. Either way, it’s not helping your already developing crush on him.

“So, um, that’s the tour I guess. What do you want to do now?” you ask, hoping he doesn’t want to leave so you can spend more time with him.

“Well Happy isn’t taking me back home until three, so we still have a few hours to do whatever. It doesn’t matter to me.”

“Do you just want to hang out in my room? Maybe watch a movie?”

“Sure! Sounds great!”

The two of you walk across the hall to your room and you open the door, regretting again your poor choice to not clean up this morning. Your bed was a mess, your clothes were strewn everywhere, and your desk was piled high with papers and books.

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry, my room is such a mess.” you exclaim, rushing to push your clothes in the corner and hastily pull your covers up in a sad attempt to make the bed.

Peter smiles and laughs, “Don’t worry, if you think this is messy, you should see my room. This is nothing.”

You laugh as well, sitting down on your bed and grabbing the TV remote. You pat your bed, motioning for Peter to sit down next to you.

“Y- you want me to sit next to you? Like on your bed?” he asks, clearly shocked.

“Oh, um, yeah. But only if you want. You can sit on the beanbag chair over there instead, I guess. I just thought the bed would be more comfortable. And you would be able to see the TV better.”

“Oh, um, ok. That’s fine.”

He makes his way over to your bed and sits next to you, and you silently turn on the TV, starting to overthink everything.

There was a boy. On. Your. Bed. You weren’t doing anything, but still. You suddenly realized how little interaction you’ve had with people your age. Even girls. You didn’t go to school, so you only hung out with the Avengers. The closest person to your age was Wanda, and even she was a lot older than you.

‘Am I being too forward?’ you started to think to yourself. ‘Should I have not asked him to sit on my bed? What is he thinking right now? Oh my god, this is so bad. He probably thinks I’m so weird. He probably hates me. Fuck.’

When you see him looking in your direction, you decide to stuff the thoughts in the back of your head and try to act as normal as possible.

“So, what should we watch?” you ask.

“Um, do you, uh... do you like Star Wars?”

“Are you kidding me? I LOVE Star Wars!” you exclaim, the tension and awkwardness easing slightly.

“Really? My favorite is A New Hope.”

“No shit! Mine too!”

“Then A New Hope it is I guess!”

You turn on the movie, smiling, and you notice that he scoots a little closer to you, seemingly more comfortable.

A few minutes into the movie, Peter breaks the silence between you two and asks, “So what’s it like living with the Avengers?”

“Oh,” you look away from the TV, “it’s cool I guess. But after a while it’s gotten pretty boring. And really frustrating.”

“Frustrating? Why?”

“It’s just, well, they treat me like a kid all the time. And before you say it, yes, I know I am a kid, but it’s still annoying. There’s no one here even close to my age, I mean fuck, Thor’s like 1500 years old. And none of them know how to talk to me. They act like I’m a toddler even though I’m literally sixteen and they never let me go on missions with them, because they don’t think I’m ready even though I’ve been training since I was like ten – “

You cut yourself off, realizing you’ve been ranting for probably a little too long.

“Sorry about that,” you mumble. “It’s just that I haven’t really had anyone to talk to about this.”

“No! Don’t be sorry. That fucking sucks. Not gonna lie, you’re kinda making me regret moving here if that’s how everyone’s gonna treat me,” he laughs.

“They’re not gonna treat you like that.”

“Why wouldn’t they? I’m the same age as you.”

“Because. You’re a fucking superhero. They don’t give a fuck about your age if you can climb walls and shoot spider webs out of your hands.”

“Well, even if they don’t treat me like a kid then I’ll still back you up.”

He puts a hand on your shoulder and smiles. You blush and smile back.

“Thanks”

“Of course.”

He scoots even closer to you so that your shoulders are barely touching. If this had happened five minutes earlier, you would be freaking out. But now, something is different. You aren’t sure what, but you suddenly feel more calm and comfortable with him around.

You finish the rest of the movie in silence, and you realize you let your head fall onto his shoulder. You were scared he would push your head away, but he didn’t care.

“You awake?” he asks.

“Oh, yeah, sorry. I just didn’t get much sleep last night and my dad woke me up early, well, to meet you.”

He smiles down at you, and suddenly your dad bursts through the door. You scramble to sit up, lifting your head off Peter’s shoulder.

“Hey kid, Happy’s here to – oh?” He stares at the two of you sitting next to each other in your bed, both blushing. “Jesus, you’ve only just met and you already slept together? At least tell me you used protection.”

“DAD, OH MY GOD, NO!” you exclaim, blushing even harder now.

“Mr. Stark, I promise. We- we were just watching a movie. Nothing happened!” Peter assures him.

“Sure, sure,” your dad winks at the two of you.

“Dad, seriously. Nothing happened!” you groan in frustration.

“Whatever. Anyways, Happy’s here to take you back to Queens Pete. Be down in five.” He leaves the room.

“God, that was fucking embarrassing,” Peter laughs getting up from the bed.

“That’s my dad for you.”

You both walk to the door, and before you leave the room, you give him a small hug.

“I’m glad you’re moving in, Peter.”

“Me too,” he smiles, “Friends?”

“Definitely.”

You smile thinking back on the memory. After that day, you and Peter have spent almost every hour of every day together. You’re rarely ever apart, even at night. You sleep with him in his bed, and he sleeps with you in yours. The rest of the team bugs the two of you to get together, but you both agree that you are just friends.  Best friends cuddle with each other and kiss each other’s foreheads and play with each other’s hair, right?

[veebs-says]

My friend just broke up with his sort-of-boyfriend with the classic "you don't love me, you love the idea of me", and it made me realize I don't love modern technology, I love the idea of it.

Yesterday morning I was just expecting to eat breakfast in my little corner like usual and then go back to bed, also like usual. Instead I ended up spending a few hours setting up my mom's new phone and trying (and failing) to transfer her Tracfone service from the old phone to the new phone. It made me never want to use a phone again.

Mine has been thoroughly purged of as much of what annoys me about it as possible, so I forget how miserable an experience it can be. Turning on a new Android phone for the first time in 2022 feels like getting a new Dell or whatever in 2006 and being greeted by like 7000 useless preinstalled bits of garbage that all autostart.

Back then the only good way to deal with it was to wipe the entire drive and install a clean version of Windows from scratch, and I have a feeling that's the only good option now too, with all the crap from the manufacturer and carrier. There's so much cool stuff in terms of the hardware in new phones and what you could do with them, and it's just completely ruined by everyone focusing on trying to make money off you instead of giving you an actual good user experience.

These particular complaints mostly only apply to Android, and you can avoid most of it by spending extra for one of the Google ones that doesn't have all that nonsense, but don't worry, I hate those too, and also iOS and iPhones for a whole different set of reasons. I'm just not complaining about those specifically right now because they're not what I have to deal with right now. It's definitely completely solidified my already pretty solid decision to never get an Android or iOS phone again if I can help it though.

So that was like four days worth of spoons by noon, and I got to spend the rest of the day in bed with a headache. Later on I was looking up a clip of something from Fire Emblem Warriors to show someone, and it's been so long since I've played any Switch game docked that I forgot how much smoother everything runs that way, which reminded me that I've been wanting a second monitor again for years.

Realistically I should've just gotten one after I'd been stuck at my parents' house for a month with no solid future plan, but I'm always reluctant to make big purchases like that and also always pretend my health will get better Soon even with no evidence for that. If I'd done it back then my body would probably be much happier because I could've been spending all this time since then actually doing stuff that doesn't need to be held up in my hands, and I could have a lot more options for ways to sit/lay around doing stuff that would also have helped.

So I finally gave in and started looking at my options. Again, there's some really neat tech out there these days. Too bad it's also all terrible. Dealing with audio with a monitor absolutely sucks because if they have a built-in DAC for a headphone jack it's generally terrible, like they can't spend an extra three bucks in a $400 monitor to have usable sound.

That would be less of a problem if it weren't such a pain in the ass to get sound out of HDMI, but it is because of all the copy protection garbage baked into the standard. All the other ways of getting sound out of a Switch suck (Bluetooth has high latency, USB audio has etremely low compatibility, and the headphone jack is extremely noisy when it's docked), and I don't want to either move or repurchase and redo my entire existing setup for that, which is an ugly hacky janky mess because I can't justify spending hundreds of dollars on a receiver to do it "right".

Ok, maybe I could just get a small TV instead. Haha no, TVs are all awful too. Anything under like 40" is surprisingly hard to find with any actually useful features I care about (high refresh rate and FreeSync, for one), and also most of them have anti-features that are an instant hard no for me. I just want a dumb screen that makes a picture show up on it when I plug something into it, and then sound comes out of the mediocre speakers too (or I can connect it to external ones without them sounding bad, unlike with most monitors). I don't want it to even know what a network is, much less be full of "smart" apps that I'll never use but still run in the background tracking what I do and reporting back to Google or whoever.

After another few hours split between last night and this morning, along with two more headaches to go with it, I gave up and got the cheapest, dumbest TV I could find. It's not at all what I want, but it'll be good for my back and neck and arms and hands to not have to hold everything I do up or be bent in weird positions to see tiny screens (with my weird, largely uncorrectable vision). And when I eventually do have a permanent setup somewhere I can maybe convince myself that it's worthwhile spending a bit more on something I actually like, because these are all solvable problems if I were willing to spend several hundred dollars more, which I'm not right now. And then I can just sell this thing for like 20 bucks or give it to someone else who needs it.

All of these things are perfect examples of why I hate proprietary software and closed standards. I still have to put up with them existing and use them to some extent, but I've minimized it enough that it's particularly jarring when I have to deal with this stuff directly. And it's so much worse actually knowing enough about it and how it works and having a tech background, because I can just see layer upon layer of terrible anti-consumer decisions that don't have to be the way they are and only are so someone can make money.

As always, this is why we can't have nice things.

[fnf-brain-rot]

[Whitty x Boyfriend]

Chapter 5 - Let's just chill!

Boyfriend awoke with a bit of an issue in the.. south region..

He groaned, putting a hand on his head before sitting up. It hurt too. He was about to handle it when he felt a presence to the side of him.

Whitty was just standing there..

Staring..

The blue haired male screamed and threw himself off the other side of the bed, which only made Whitty blink and lean over to look. "Sorry I startled you." He called to him. Boyfriend could only see the swirls in his vision. He eventually got up, pulling himself back onto his bed, also bringing his comforter back up as well. "Whitty, how long have you been standing there?"

"Mmh... Most of the night."

"Wh-MOST-"

Boyfriend threw his hands up in exasperation. "Did you SLEEP??" In response to his question, Whitty shook his head. "I told you I don't really need to." Boyfriend grimaced in his direction, making a small sound of discomfort to himself, then sighed heavily. "I just wanted to make sure you were okay. I thought you were having a nightmare." Whitty admitted softly. Boyfriend's cheeks began to heat up as he spoke. "It sounded like you were calling my name.. Was I.. doing something bad to you?" Whitty seemed hesitant to ask, gently pulling on the large shirt he was given.

"No no no! You didn't do anything bad! I uh.. It was uh.." Boyfriend bit his knuckle. Well he certainly couldn't say what was actually happening, but he was such a bad liar. "It was a recap of our day out.. yesterday!" He blurted out. Whitty blinked. He did something bad yesterday. Bee says it wasn't directed towards him, but he was still weary of him thinking about it. "How about you go wait in the living room? I'll make us some breakfast, yeah?" Boyfriend offered, and Whitty nodded, turning around to leave the room, of course, obliviously leaving the door open. Boyfriend let out a gentle sigh and got up to close it, then deal with his issue. Shouldn't take too long..

___________________________________________

Whitty sat down on the couch, nervously fiddling with his fingers as he stared at the blank tv. He couldn't have left a bad impression right? Of course not, if he didn't like him, he certainly wouldn't invite him over, and cuddle with him. Cuddling.. was nice. It would be nice to do that right now. He decided to figure out the tv, picking up the remote and mashing a random button. He pressed damn there  every button on the device before actually getting to the power button, and he couldn't help but jump when he heard the tv turn on.

He wasn't sure if he was ready to meet Dearest's daughter today. At least it was only her, and from what he knew, she knew nothing about him other than when they first met. Does she even know she's meeting the same guy? She looked pretty scared of him. Whitty squirmed in discomfort at the thought. What if she knew about him and her dad? What if she didn't like him? What if she rats him out? His head swirled with worst case scenarios, and he couldn't help but stress about it. Boyfriend exited his room about five minutes later. Whitty could hear the bare feet slap against the wooden hallway floor. "Whitty? Whitty, what's wrong?" The blue haired male rushed to the couch. Whitty hadn't realized he had started crying, clutching his head in his hands like he felt a pain too great to bare.

Boyfriend hopped onto the furniture beside him, gently hugging his head against his chest. "I'm sorry, did I upset you? I promise you didn't do anything bad." He mumbled softly. Whitty shook his head. "I'm just.. nervous." Boyfriend parted a bit, looking down at the bomb with a slightly confused expression. "Nervous? About what?"

"Meeting her."

Boyfriend understood. She did talk about how scary and dangerous he seemed. He didn't exactly specify that it was Whitty he was talking to. There is a chance she could freak out when she sees him. Maybe Boyfriend hadn't thought this all the way through..

"How about we eat breakfast? It's hard to think on an empty stomach." He hugged onto Whitty again, gently rubbing his back. Whitty quickly began to relax. No one had ever done this with him before, and it was really affective. He really liked it. "Can we do that thing first? The cuddle?" Whitty asked softly, and Boyfriend grinned. "Of course we can, Whits." He got down, then climbed into Whitty's lap, but he faced him this time, wiping away his tears, just like he did under the tree. Whitty couldn't help but smile a little, wrapping his arms around Boyfriend in a slightly tighter squeeze than the first time. He felt warm..

___________________________________________

Boyfriend had decided to make waffles, oatmeal, grits, scrambled eggs, fried eggs, bacon, sausage, hash browns, anything he could honestly find in his kitchen to make a big enough meal for someone who eats so much so fast. He himself was contempt with eating two waffles and some eggs, while Whitty, of course, ate everything else. "Dude, where does it all go?" Bee then asked, receiving a simple "hm?" from Whitty across from him. "Like.. You eat so much, but it's like it literally melts right off of you." Whitty shrugged. "It kinda does.. I digest food faster than normal humans." He explained softly. He picked up his dirty dishes and put them in the sink, with instruction, and did the same with Boyfriend's dishware. "Aww you don't have to clean up after us every time." Boyfriend laughed, sitting up and stretching before standing out of his seat. "I like to. I like to think it shows.. my appreciation for you feeding me." Whitty responded in a soft tone. Of course he didn't really know how to DO dishes, just put them in the sink. Boyfriend would deal with that pile later.

"Come on, let's get ready to go. I have a whole day planned for us." Boyfriend bounced on his toes before rushing back to his room to change. Whitty sighed softly. He didn't know how to use the dryer..

Boyfriend was quick to throw on his usual baggy jeans, white shirt, and his cap. He could barely contain his excitement, he was running back and forth in the hall, of course grabbing his mic and pocketing it for good measure. Whitty had crouched down in front of the dryer, staring intensely at it. "My clothes are trapped." He whined softly. Boyfriend came out from behind him, and couldn't help but laugh. "This is the handle to pull it open." He pulled it, and Whitty let out a sound of relief. His clothes were free!!

___________________________________________

"I'm gonna miss this carpet."

"We're gonna come back dummy."

Whitty blinked. He hadn't thought of returning to his house, he thought he was only letting him stay one night..

Boyfriend was sneaky in managing to get him to stay. He secretly applauded himself. He then smiled up at Whitty, gently grabbing his hand. "Let's get going!"

He decided to take Whitty to all his favorite spots. There was a burger joint he and Pico occasionally hung out at, and Whitty was totally down to eat again, so they went.

"Yeah, all the good stuff happens at night, so that's when we go see Gigi." Boyfriend explained with his mouth full, and Whitty nodded to show he was listening. "Oh crap, I forgot! I'm battling her mom tonight! I don't really know where though, they were gonna come pick me up." Boyfriend put a hand on his head and threw it back in distress. "Does this mean I won't meet.. Gigi?" Whitty questioned him. Boyfriend shook his head. "I guess we'll just have to wait until after. Her mom is sneaky as hell, who knows where she is at any time." He shuddered. That lady genuinely scares him.

Next up was the mall.

Whitty was hesitant to go into such a crowded area, but Boyfriend led him through the door in the back way. There were way less people coming through there, so he wouldn't have to worry about being spotted. As they entered, though, Whitty got this weird feeling.. Like they were being watched. He looked around the clothing section they were in. It was quiet back there too, save for the gentle music playing from the speakers in the ceiling. "Ooh! We should shop clothes for you!" Boyfriend then suggested. "But.. I won't be able to carry them with me everywhere.." Whitty objected, holding his hands up nervously. "You won't carry them everywhere. They'll be at my place." Boyfriend pointed his thumb at his own chest proudly.

He really did trick him into moving in, didn't he?

"The only money I get is from the collabs I've been doing so far, so until I get rich and famous, you can get one more outfit and a pair of shoes." Whitty hummed uncomfortably. Now he was taking more money from him, great. "Hey, I'm offering. Now go pick out what you like." Boyfriend smacked Whitty's leg at the knee cap gently, and Whitty quickly held  it, puffing his cheeks. "Fineeee, I'll go pick out something.." He huffed reluctantly, but proceeded to look at some shirts and pants and such.

___________________________________________

The two walked out of the mall with one bag, and Boyfriend was holding a box, which had his new shoes in it. "Thanks.. for getting me new clothes. I'm sorry to spend your money." Whitty mumbled shamefully, and Boyfriend huffed at him. "I told you, I don't mind. I want you to be comfortable since it's obvious you've never relaxed a day in your life." Bee grunted in response, nudging his leg as they walked. Whitty laughed nervously, looking behind them. He swore up and down he felt like someone was following them..

"Where to next?" Boyfriend thought out loud, mostly to himself. It was already one in the afternoon, they only had about three hours left until they were coming to pick him up. They decided to go back to the house. Whitty felt uncomfortable being out in the open for so long. "You're sure you didn't tell anyone you were talking to me?" The bomb asked, taking his shoes off inside the house. "Yes, Whitty. I haven't mentioned your name to anyone. If anything I addressed you as 'the guy I battled last week' to Pico. Why?" Whitty shook his head, stepping onto the carpet, then relaxing all over again. It was just so soft-

"Whitty?" Boyfriend turned to look at him. Whitty sighed under his breath, then sat up. "I.. felt like someone was following us. All day. It just feels ironic that I'm supposedly meeting someone-a friend of yours-today." He muttered. Boyfriend stared at him for a moment. "You don't think.. You're not thinking I set you up, are you?" He asked hesitantly, putting a hand to his own chest. Whitty didn't answer right away. He curled up into a ball in his spot, the possibilities beginning to race through his mind all over again. Suddenly he didn't feel as safe as he wanted to. Suddenly he couldn't trust Boyfriend as much as he wanted to. Bee could see him breaking down into an anxious wreck, staring intently at one spot on the floor.

He was a little hurt, yes, but this guy had so many people out for him, it wasn't even funny. He couldn't be mad at him for being cautious. That's why he's still alive today. "Whitty.." Boyfriend approached him, and his heart broke when he saw how Whitty coiled away a bit. He didn't stop though. He crouched down, putting a hand on his head. Whitty slowly looked up at him, his black, inky tears trailing down his cheeks once again today. "When I told you I would be there for you, I meant it." He told him. "I wouldn't throw you in the gutter. Remember that? I would never set up my friend. If you don't feel safe going outside, you can stay in here, okay?" Boyfriend gently leaned forward, placing a kiss on his forehead.

Whitty had no idea what that was, but he liked how it felt. It was like his worries melted away with the feeling. Like he was.. safe. He took a breath, then nodded at Boyfriend's words. "Wait.. do that again?" Whitty's eyes held a less somber expression, and he gently held onto Boyfriend's head. This caused him to blush heavily. Whitty could feel his face heating in his hands. "W-What? A-A kiss?" Boyfriend was a little surprised as Whitty nodded. He tried to calm his heart beat. He could feel it beating out of his chest, so hard he would have thought he was having a heart attack. He leaned down and gave Whitty another peck on the forehead, and the taller couldn't help but close his eyes at the warmth it gave him.

"Thank you, BB." Whitty responded softly, letting his face go, then standing back up. "Y-Y-Yeah! N-No p-problem!" Boyfriend's hands were shaking, and he was laughing awkwardly. His face was so red, and Whitty remembered what that meant. He smiled, then picked Boyfriend up, a high pitched "beep!" coming from him. "Whitty!!" He exclaimed nervously, hiding his face in his hands. Whitty tilted his head. That must be an even more positive reaction! He sat down on the couch, still holding Bee in his arms. He was determined they would cuddle until Girlfriend came to get him.

___________________________________________

Boyfriend jolted awake to Whitty staring down at him. Again. He yelped out, but quickly exhaled, putting a hand on his own chest. "You don't wanna be late for your battle." Whitty noted softly. He was still holding Boyfriend. No wonder he fell asleep so fast. He sat up, and Whitty allowed him to, setting him on the floor in front of the couch. Boyfriend stretched his arms up, groaning at the good stretch. "Thanks Whits.." He mumbled softly, his face quickly beginning to redden again just by looking at him. "I'll protect the house while you're gone, don't worry." Whitty told him, and Bee laughed. "I'm sure you will." He made his way over to the door, slipping his shoes back on. "You sure you'll be okay?" He turned around, and watched as Whitty curled up on the couch. He nodded in response, turning the tv on. Bee smiled, then made his way out.

Whitty really wanted to see Boyfriend's little rap battle, to of course be emotional support, but he couldn't be seen. It sucked. He felt lonely all over again, sitting in the living room, sitting on a small couch in front of a tv playing something he wasn't interested in, and he had no knowledge of how to change the channel. He hugged his knees to his chest, puffing one of his cheeks in thought. Boyfriend seemed to genuinely care for him. He.. really did care for him.. Hopefully his friends are similar to that. Even if they weren't, Boyfriend was enough for him. He was all he needed..

___________________________________________

Whitty looked away from the cats on the screen about an hour later to the sound of the front door opening. His insides fluttered, like.. weirdly. He put a hand on his chest as the door opened, and Boyfriend walked in, talking to someone and laughing. He turned to look at Whitty, then winked. "Gigi, here's the guy I wanted you to meet!" Girlfriend walked past him, and looked directly into Whitty's eyes. They stared at each other for a moment, and Whitty began to sweat nervously. "H.. Hi-"

"I'm very sorry!"

Whitty's eyes widened, and his cheeks began to glow orange. "I also participated in pushing you to that point, and I wanted to apologise for doing that." She took her shoes off, making her way into the living room. Whitty and Boyfriend let out a breath of relief, the latter quickly following after her. "I-It's okay.. really.. it happens.." Whitty stammered awkwardly, shrinking against the couch as she smiled up at him.

"I'm Girlfriend, but just call me Gigi. I hope we can get to know each other better. And don't worry, I'll keep you a secret from my parents." Whitty's eyes brightened as she spoke those words. She seemed kind already. "See!! I told you it would go well!" Boyfriend hugged Girlfriend from behind, making her giggle. "Yeah.." Whitty mumbled to himself.

Maybe it won't be that bad making friends..

[jaehyunspeachparty]

daddy jaehyun

iv.l. (a)

Sunoh has loved banana bread with peanut butter lately. So you bake him the banana bread every few days so that he can eat his favorite breakfast. And you've been preparing it for him for weeks, also for Miga, but that day the smell made you sick. It was so disgusting that you immediately turn around and throw up in the sink. "Mummy, are you sick?" Asks Miga and came running towards you. You quickly take a glass and fill it with water. "Sweetheart, can you smell on the bread?” You point to the plate and Miga took the banana bread and smelled it. "Does it smell bad?" You ask her, but the girl shook her head. "No, it smells like every day. Super yummy!" She grins and still holds the plate tightly in her small hands. It was strange. Why did the bread smell so disgusting to you, but it was okay for Miga? “Oh,okay! Can you take the plates and give one to your brother?" You couldn't see the banana bread anymore and you didn't want to smell it. You drink water and rinse your vomit in the sink. You actually feel good again and didn't know why this sudden nausea was coming. "Are you all right, Mummy?" Miga looked at you worriedly when you sat down with her with the glass of water. "Yes, I was only sick for a moment." You smile and take another sip of water. The taste of the vomit was still in your mouth and you couldn't wait to brush your teeth. But Jaehyun was still asleep, as his hungover was more intense and he came home very late. But your dizziness was not good and you fear that you may have been sick after all. Until Jaehyun wakes up, you just decide to sit down with the kids in front of the TV. You don't really like the kids watching TV all day, but you feel so tired and dizzy. Jaehyun still wasn't awake and you were so angry. While Miga and Sunoh watched TV, Geon sat on the floor and chewed on his toys. Kiwoo was on top of you and you breastfeed your son. "Slow down my little one." Kiwoo was quite greedy and drank incredibly quickly. Maybe he had a growth spurt. "Mummy, is Daddy not here again today?" Suddenly, Miga wasn't interested in the television anymore, she missed her father. "He's still sleeping. He came home very late yesterday." You look at her and smile gently. "But he's always there on weekends." She looked at you sadly and you see more and more how the children miss their father. "You can go to wake him up," you suggest and you thought anyway that Jaehyun should now take care of his children. "Sunoh, come on let's go to Daddy." She pulled on his sleeve, but Sunoh shook his head. "No," he said pouting and crawling in your direction. "Don't you like to see your Daddy?" You ask him carefully and stroke his head. "I want to cuddle now." For Sunoh, having Kiwoo on top of you was more of a problem because he wanted your attention now. Sunoh always expressed himself differently with his feelings. While Miga always said what she wanted, Sunoh was more likely to say that he wanted more attention from you. Since Jaehyun was not home that much, his attacks of jealousy had started again. "Then I'll go to Daddy alone," Miga then said and hopped off the couch. "Mummyyyyyy ..." Sunoh started to whimper because he still couldn't climb on you. "Sunoh, I'm still breastfeeding your brother. You have to wait now." You speak to him more strictly now, but Sunoh didn't like that at all. He started to cry and didn't want to accept the rebuff. Geon looked at his big brother in amazement and then looked at you. You were now afraid that he would start crying too. Geon was more empathetic and usually went along with the feelings of his siblings. You were just exhausted. You had now reached a point where you were wondering if having so many children was a good idea. You think of Johanna, who was now a single parent. If you ever separated from Jaehyun, would you manage to raise your four children well? "Mummy ... cuddle with me ..." Sunoh continued howling and pulled on your shirt. "Stop it Sunoh. When I'm done with Kiwoo we can cuddle, but you have to wait now." You admonish him and look at him seriously. It hurt you to turn him away like that, but all you knew was that he was seeking Jaehyun's lack of attention from you. "NOOOO!" He kept crying and his whole face was red and wet. Tears rolled down his cheeks and snot ran under his nose. You lean over to the table and quickly take a handkerchief to clean him a little. But Sunoh didn't stop crying and now Geon, who was watching the whole situation, joined in. The 9 month old boy also started crying because his big brother was crying. Only Kiwoo was in a trance and continued to drink from your breast. He was so busy with his food that he didn't see the drama. Such scenes have happened a lot lately and you didn't know what to do anymore. You were glad that Miga was already so independent. "What's going on here?" Jaehyun came to you now and saw the whole catastrophe. Sunoh looked at him and cried again. "Mummyyyyy ..." He put his fingers in his mouth and his face was even wetter now. "Come on, leave Mummy alone now. We're going into the kitchen." Jaehyun was about to pick up Sunoh, but then the boy began to scream and clung to you. "NOOOOOOOOOO!" He was screaming so loudly that Miga covered her ears. "Come on Sunoh. Let go of Mummy." Jaehyun sighed and didn't understand why Sunoh had such outbursts of anger. "NOOO! I want to stay with Mummy." Sunoh screamed and screamed and you couldn't look at it any longer. "Jaehyun, just take Geon and go." After all, your little son was also sitting on the floor, looking at his older brother and crying too. You knew that he was only crying because Sunoh was crying and once he was gone he would calm down again. Jaehyun sighed and went around the couch to pick up Geon. Then he took Miga by the hand and they left the room. "My big boy, what's the matter with you?" You ask him worriedly and wipe his tears away. As soon as Jaehyun was out of the room, he calmed down again. "I want to be with you." Sunoh sobbed a little more, but he looked at you with wide eyes. "Okay, but no more crying. Okay?" You look at him seriously and Sunoh nodded. You open your arm and Sunoh lay down in your armpit. The boy looked back at the TV and Kiwoo slowly fell asleep on your chest.

After lunch, as always, Geon, Kiwoo and Sunoh took their nap. Miga sat in her room and played with her dolls. It was the first time you and Jaehyun could be alone. You are actually looking forward to this time, but today you are afraid of a confrontation. But nausea also contracted in your stomach. Have you been sick? "Y/N ... I'm sorry about yesterday." Jaehyun came up to you and looked at you with concern. So many emotions came up and immediately tears ran down your cheeks. "I don't know why I didn't called. I think I just needed an evening to myself." Jaehyun stroked his head and didn't quite know what to say. "Do you think I don't even need a break. My job is 24/7. I’m alone with the children and never have a break. I can only make the children sleep at the same time, like now, if you help." You got angry and couldn't control your tears. "Should we hire someone? Do you need help?" Jaehyun then asked, but that's not the problem. "No, that's not the point. I love our children and I am happy to be there for them 24/7. But what about us?" You look at him and press your lips together. "We just have to slow down now. It's only for a few more weeks. My job isn't forever and the children are just more important now. I don't have any more time." Jaehyun himself was desperate about the situation, but that was his only solution. But that statement broke your heart. He confirmed to you what you were afraid of. You weren't important enough right now. "You just decide to push me away?" You close your eyes for a moment and hope that you are just having a bad nightmare. "No, I don't want to push you away. But the job makes money and I can't neglect the children." "I miss you, that I can hardly bare it anymore and you make a list where you put me in. Apparently, drinking is more important than me too." You reach for a handkerchief to quickly drain your tears. "I really miss you. And it was so stupid from that I was yesterday out but...", Jaehyun said immediately, but suddenly you hear a voice. "Daddy, can we play?" Miga came down to you and you turn away because you didn't want her to see that you were crying. Jaehyun saw you pull away from him. He picked Miga up and kissed her cheek. "Of course, let's go play."

You have to admit that you weren't sure yourself if you were right. You feel selfish for soliciting Jaehyun's attention, but you miss him. And at the same time you were angry that he came home drunk yesterday evening and then argued this with "I need a break". You were in one back and forth. Your feelings were mixed up and you could hardly think clearly. You got that terrible nausea again. You notice how suddenly your body became so weak. Did you feel sick because of the psychological pressure? Why was your body so weird? But it didn't take long to think about it, because you couldn't hold the contents of your stomach in you anymore. You immediately run to the bathroom and throw up everything. Then you wipe your mouth and lean on the toilet seat. You didn't want any more, you were weak and hardly had any more strength. All of this made you so exhausted. Jealousy almost consumed you. What was wrong with you? You were now what you hated about Jaehyun. You hated it so much when he was jealous and now you're collapsing here because you didn't like him kissing another woman, that he was spending more time with this woman than with you and that she might be there last night too when Jaehyun had a drink with his coworkers. You pull your legs towards you and begin to cry bitterly. Your heart ached and you hate that side of you.

daddy jaehyun masterlist

[theunquenchablethirst]

Home Pt1: The Orphanage (Jeremiah X Reader)

First multi-chapter fic I’ve ever written, so critics please be gentle, but feedback is much appreciated. This chapter is just about introducing the reader to the story, but I do have more chapters ready to go out. Lemme know if you want them ☺️

Slow burn and mentions of childhood trauma/abuse

Find Pt.2 here

Reader is an orphan about to turn 18 when a wealthy man visits the orphanage looking for an older girl. She is put up as a possible option and she isn’t happy about it.

Masterlist

Growing up in the orphanage was horrible. They treated us all like workhorses from the moment we arrived. They would demand so much from us from such an early age and when we couldn’t do it, we would get beaten or starved or have to spend the night in the basement with the rats. If not all three. And then they wondered why we didn’t have the strength for all the hard labour they forced upon us.

They didn’t care about us one bit. They used to send us to clean rich people's houses to make money off us. I remember one girl got sent out and came back covered in bruises. She tried to tell them she didn’t want to go back, that the guy was a creep and he touched her. They still sent her and one day she just disappeared. We all knew what happened, but we didn’t dare say anything. We were the weak ones and in Gotham, nobody cares about the weak ones.

I remember praying every night for some nice couple to come and save me. Adopt me. But year after year passed and I learned to abandon those dreams. I’d read in the paper about some guy called Jerome Valeska. He’d murdered his mom. I also saw him when I’d been sent out on maid duty, on a client's TV when they were watching the news. He seemed unhinged, like a rabid dog, talking into the camera about sanity and how we were all just prisoners and cogs. He said was the leader of a gang called the Maniax. We’d all heard of them at the orphanage and what they’d done. I decided if that was what family could do to you, then maybe it wasn’t for me. It wasn’t like anyone was coming for me anyway.

Instead, I focused on counting the days to my 18th birthday. They kicked you out once you turned 18, but it was a time everyone in the orphanage looked forward to. I remember how excited I was when the time crawled ever closer. It was just a few weeks, but time seemed to slow down as they were passing. It was painful.

I had everything I was going to do planned out in my head. First, I was going to punch the head master square in the nose and tell him just how much I hated him. Then I was going to walk my ass straight to the GCPD and let them know everything. It was my chance get that place shut down forever. To help the other kids and get them sent somewhere decent. I would be stood out front watching the day it closed. Watching with the biggest, tooth baring smile on my face.

I still hate that I never got the chance.

My 18th was a few weeks away and I could taste my freedom. Everyone was hyping me up for it and some of the younger ones were telling me how much they were going to miss me and trying to spend as much time with me as they could. There were a few sour apples because they were jealous, but I understood and I would squeeze them all so tightly before I left.  

“Stop daydreaming and get back to the floor!” A harsh voice came and I was brought back to reality with a smack to the back of my head.

It was the head master's assistant, Mr Grimes. A name that suited him well. He was stalking the halls again, looking for the daydreamers like me so he could tear them down. I was supposed to be scrubbing the wooden floorboards, but I let my mind run away with me for a minute. I should’ve known better by then.

He got halfway down the hallway, trapsing dirt over where I’d just cleaned, when he stopped in his tracks and turned back to me.

“You’re up tomorrow, by the way.” He said, in that matter-of-fact tone that made everyone despise him that extra bit more.

“What?” I must’ve heard him wrong.

“You’re up. Some rich guy’s coming in looking for an older girl. That means you.”

“I can’t be. I’m getting out next month.”

“It’s right here in black and white. And you know I don’t make mistakes.” He gestured to the folder under his arm that had the details for tomorrow in it and apparently my name was listed inside.

I stopped to let the wheels in my head turn and try and figure this out. Being up meant that you were going to be presented for possible adoption. I couldn’t be... could I? Not now I was this close? Mr Grimes turned to leave, but turned back once more.

“By the way, says here this guy's 26. So, he’s probably not looking for a daughter. And if he’s coming here instead of some maid agency... Well, I'll let you think about that.”  

Mr Grimes smiled one of the slimiest smiles I’d ever seen before walking away. I knew what he meant and I also knew that nobody here cared. I threw the scrubbing brush into the bucket of soapy water, causing a splash. I was so angry. Angry that my plans could be potentially ruined, that I could be adopted by some rich guy with nefarious intentions, angry that they would let that happen to any of the girls here.

I allowed a few tears to escape my eyes, but quickly told myself off for it. I had promised myself I wouldn’t cry for this place any longer years ago. It felt like giving it power or losing to it and I was not going to give this dump the satisfaction. I didn’t sleep at all that night. Knowing what tomorrow was going to bring sat on my shoulders like two boulders. I was either going to see one of my sisters be taken away to god knows what, or be taken myself. I hadn’t told anybody about it. I didn’t want anybody else feeling this dread.  

Morning came. The wakeup call was 7am sharp. Everyone stirred and groaned, but they knew they’d regret it if they didn’t get up with the bell. Now began the battle for the showers. First come, first serve for the hot water. If you were too slow you had to shower in water like ice. However, I wasn’t in the mood to battle it out for hot water. I would feel terrible if I got some and the girl that got adopted today didn’t, so I let them all have war without me. I was used to the cold water anyway.

Downstairs at breakfast I couldn’t eat. I felt like I had a pit in my stomach and if I ate anything I would just throw it back up. The food was disgusting anyway.  I sat there with a glass of water deep in thought until a bell rang that caught all of our attention. The only time that bell rang was when the head master was going to be joining us for breakfast, which was rare. But in he came and sat at the front in front of all of us, Mr Grimes standing at his side like a loyal dog. I knew why he was here. He was going to break the news.

“Good morning children.” He said in his dull, boring voice, looking over the room as if scanning it.

“Good morning, head master.” Everyone replied in unison. We knew the drill.

“I have an exciting announcement.”

Everyone was gripped. You could’ve heard a pin drop.

“Now, this does only concern the girls. Boys, perhaps next time.”

A few whispers could be heard as everyone looked around at each other.  

“There will be a man coming in later. A wealthy man. He is going to take one of you home.”

Smiles could be seen on my sisters faces and they continued to whisper to each other curiously.

“Unfortunately, not all of you are candidates. Mr Grimes has a list of everyone that is going to be presented. When he calls your name, you are to go back upstairs and change into your display clothes. We must make a good impression if we are to find homes, girls.”

Mr Grimes opened the folder he had with him yesterday and pulled out a piece of paper. All of my sisters were on the edges of their seats, biting their lips, fingers crossed. All of them hoping today could be the day. I was hoping for the exact opposite.

“Shelby... Lisa... Mary... Joanne... Bethany.... And...” Then he called my name. The girls smiles reached ear to ear and they giggled to themselves as they stood up. We were all the oldest girls, 17 or few months away.  

“Congratulations, girls. Today could be the start of a new life... for one of you.” The headmaster also rose from his seat and he left the room leaving Mr Grimes to finish.

“You girls, upstairs and make yourselves look half human. The rest of you, better luck next time.”

Back in our dorm all the girls were laughing and smiling. They were all so happy, getting their presentation clothes ready. They were all the same. The outfit we had to wear if we were up. A black skirt that reached just below the knees with a black, quarter sleeve shirt with a white collar. Our only pair of good, clean white socks and black plimsoles. We were all identical in these outfits, except for different things we would do with our hair. Some would do braids, some pony tails or buns. The lucky ones managed to scrounge up some cute clips and bows. It was all very exciting for everyone. Everyone, but me.

“I can’t believe it! One of us is getting out of this soggy shack!” Laughed Shelby.

“I know! I knew keeping that lucky penny was worth it!”  Mary giggled as she pulled a penny out of her shoe and kissed it.

“Whoever it is that goes, we’ll still always be sisters, right?” Joanne piped up. She had always had a nervous disposition.  

The girls all stopped. They were so giddy with the news that they forgot today was also goodbye for one of us. The sudden sadness in the air was palpable. I could see tears start to gather in their eyes and my heart broke.

“Stop it. Stop it all of you. No matter what happens today, we will all always be sisters. We’ve been through so much together that even if we are scattered to all corners of the globe, we’ll still all be sisters. Nothing can change that. Ever.” I forced, half scolding them. We huddled together and began saying how much we loved each other, going over memories we had. We stayed like that until the bell rang, letting us know we only had a little time left before the line-up.

We stood lined up by the front door. I’d never liked this bit. It felt like we were on display in a shop window. Like we were on sale.

“Is this the best you could do? I’ll be surprised if he doesn’t just walk away.” Mr Grimes scoffed as he looked us up and down. He was the one who was going to be introducing us. The head master stayed in his office, he only dealt with the paperwork of it.

“And don’t say anything, unless he talks to you. Nobody buys a cow for its personality.”  

We heard a car pull up outside and the nerves kicked in.

“Sounds like he’s here. Stand up straight, girls. Somebody’s life’s about to change.”

Then there it was. The sound I’d been dreading since yesterday afternoon.

Knock, knock, knock...

“Let the sale commence.”