#i slorp

[skelewife]

i don't know if tumblr has seen this yet but this is honest to god my favorite video

[merlins-beards]

*Pouring the Brita fioter directly into my mouth*: "I feel so connected to nature"

[glove23]

d20: yeah this is the horror season

everyone: yeah cool love that

d20: -horrors beyond comprehension happen-

everyone: UM? EXCUSE ME? EXCUSE ME??

[an-albino-pinetree]

licky tongue -v-

@kookydoodleky I'm not sure if you want me to tag you in every piece I do featuring your au ; ;

[laniusbignaturals]

Joshua Graham grew up in a community that treated reproductive education as a taboo so he probably reached adulthood believing, as the tradcath weirdo who wrote Sinfest did, that all women walked around with boobs full of milk 24/7 and were able to lactate on command. And Edward and Bill had to explain it. While themselves acting as physical education equipment.

[catilinas]

at a pottery painting cafe w the bestie she is painting a pink frog i am painting. my best attempt at a design from a white ground funerary lekythos. on a mug

[canary-inacoalmine]

it/its pronouns but only in the way that the Toy Soilder is an it/its

[ohimsummer]

Imagine having a threesome with suguru and satoru, and i mean that shits NAAAASTY

there’s spit everywhere, there’s bites and hickeys on everyone, everyone’s just wet and horny AND READER IS LEG LOCKING TF OUTTA THEM

sorry i’m in class rn n BOY am i day dreaming

ITS SLOPPY AND DISGUSTING BAYBEEEEEE FREAK HOE BEHAVIOR

can i use this ask to spill my “using a double sided dildo w satoru” thoughts….both of you in a scissoring position while suguru wrecks your throats <3 satoru jerking off while your asses are slapping together…bonus points: it’s a Bluetooth dildo that vibrates and ofc suguru has the remote <<33 makes you both choke on his dick and gives you slaps across the cheeks just to be mean </3 (he slaps a little harder if u guys are too fucked out to answer him. Because of course he’s gonna make you tell him how good his cock tastes and how much you love it down your throat <<33)

also back on my ball-loving bullshit <<<3333 licking and sucking on Suguru’s balls while satoru sucks his dick <<33 his hands are going everywhere from the back of your heads to rubbing thru his own hair to gripping the sheets and suguru is groaning and grunting so loud until he’s thrusting up into the air and Satoru’s gagging on his cock 🫣 you both have to hold his hips down because HOWW r u supposed to worship his dick and balls if he’s doing all that moving and squirming 🤨?? sir SIT STILL !!!

the double penetration in a stsg sandwich btw 💛 satoru beneath you and suguru on top….satoru getting so whiny and overstimulated he’s just sinking his teeth into you to muffle his noises while suguru does it because you make more noise when he does <3 bites into your neck or shoulders or ass while eating u out just to hear you cry and moan and whine.

++ satoru sucking hickeys into your thighs while giving you head because he has to mark what’s his <</3 you sucking more marks into Satoru’s neck while you play with his nipples and suguru deepthroats him….okay I’m done (I’m not) IM DONE

[kerryweaverlesbian]

Dean: real men don't drink out of cups this small 🙄 *slorp slorp slorp*

He literally. SO OFTEN. Makes up things to feel emasculated about and then does them immediately. WHAT is your gender, buddy!!!!

[intrepid-goobers]

frankly insane that I made a single post abt Zelda kissing girls and u guys all sloped that shit up like you were 18th century paupers and someone just spilled some stew on the street

[britcision]

I have this problem where I forget who I’ve shared this headcanon with so now the answer’s gonna be ALL OF YOU

1) the Batfam get some Fenton tech when Danny explains the whole ghost mess

2) the Batkids specifically realise Jason can the thermos’d

3) Jason declares bullshit that only he can be thermos’d, he’s still at least half alive

4) Danny and Jason and Tucker debate the merits of a human-capable thermos, specifically for Gotham’s rogues

5) much work later, a human-capable thermos is devised

6) Jason shares this information by going on a rabid campaign to thermos every single one of his siblings

7) Alfred gets the first model so he can send Tim and Bruce to Soup Time and make them sleep

This is going in like chapter 20 of Dead and Loving It so by all means please steal Batkid Thermos Tag because nothing in this world makes me happier

Except Dick teaching them all combat juggling but they can do both

[kiefbowl]

if I let my impulsive thoughts win I'd be screaming "CUNNILINGUS" in the office right now on this beautiful monday morning

[lyss-sketchbox]

🦐 shrimp in yo inbox

[kurowrites]

I'm honestly so tired, there is so much misinformation about diet and fitness out there... I'm just trying to find something that works for me and my needs but digging through the metric tons of bullshit is just exhausting.

[angelbambisworld]

Gene baby please lemme slorp on that thang

PLEASE

[garaviel]

Watched twisters yesterday and had a miniature dose of what Actual Scientists must feel when sci fi movies bs what certain materials do