#i should be able to finish them in a week
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*hands him to you* enjoy
#the rest of the hex is still cooking#i should be able to finish them in a week#warframe#warframe 1999#quincy isaacs#art#fanart#hey how in the hells did this get so many notes
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Scholarly peak is catching up on recent literature
#bingqiu#shen qingqiu#luo binghe#svsss#sqq#lbh#my art#which is honestly just to say that i've finished the other two print books i was reading#and am now prepared to leap feet first into svsss bk4#i succeeded in holding off for an entire two weeks. i have the conviction of a wet paper towel.#lets see bk4 was described as - what? - an ''angst and smut pile''??#i am very much looking forward to this#i was promised a story with my snake boy#because i am very much not over zhuzhi-lang's fate so this had better be A REALLY NICE HAPPY ONE FOLKS#anyway have sqq and lbh cuddling and reading as i project on them#i like to assume that as time goes on sqq is able to relax his persona a bit more around lbh#i think he should get to cuddle and bitch about shitty novels#but man sqh is really the ONLY source of any books that have an even slightly modern cadence/style i have a feeling sqq would be very keen#though if i'm being honest i really wonder if sqh could ever bring himself to write fiction again#if you're A Writer it tends to be hard to RESIST you just get an itch to tell a story#but also like... the fear that all of this could happen again... or that the characters you're creating might be REAL and SUFFERING...#yeah... i honestly suspect he can't write anymore and that it honestly probably sucks a lot... but for the sake of this joke he is :P
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Fuck all of y'all in Florida how dare you misrepresent my liberal king that man loves women (not in that way) and he would not STAND for this smh
#yk damn well he'd make the vague but absolutely not vague threats and then actually follow through on them#HE WOULD NOT MISS!!!!!!!#anyways this week has sucked so bad dear god#the cold I've had for a month has apparently been pneumonia#And I coughed so hard I TORE A FUCKING MUSCLE in my ribs and I could barely move for days and had to sleep in a recliner#also finally got diagnosed with adhd but found out all my old teachers told my mom they think I have it and I should get tested but NOOOOOOO#SHE DIDN'T WANT TO DEAL WITH IT#there literally couldn't have been a clearer sign than when I almost failed fourth grade because I couldn't turn in my homework on time#The election obviously my immediate family are full Kamala but my grandparents are VERY Trump#Oh and my brothers therapist told us he apparently has the most severe case of executive dysfunction he's seen in his 30 years of working#He literally told us to just take him out of college and let him live at home forever because he won't be able to finish school#because of it so THAT'S gonna be fun since my dad said if he ever tries to come live back here he'll throw him out on the streets#THIS IS JUST IN A WEEK#WHO IS MY OPP I DON'T KNOW WHAT I DID BUT I DON'T DESERVE THIS FANFIC WRITER ASS LORE#LEAVE ME ALONE 😭#red vs blue#rvb#rooster teeth#rvb florida#election 2024
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Listen. I had plans for them. I worked my ass off to deliver literally the best drawing I ever made in my life but I fucked up so you’re only getting a silly doodle now
#blasphemous#my art#sketch#doodle#based on that one picture of Carla Bruni and Arno Klarsfeld at the fashion week you know the one I’m talking about#I have an entire stock of pictures like that that I have to redraw with them#am I going to have YET ANOTHER mental breakdown over my failure tonight?#most probably#you known the lineart is very good at least and I should be able to post it on tumblr#know*#but I am prevented from doing so because I know the whole piece is unfinished#I’ve been thinking about trying to finish it again lately but. like#it’s impossible#I had grand ambitions for this piece#I remade it from start more than 5 times#and right now it definitely is closer to perfection than my first attempt but I disappointed myself IMMENSELY. it’s too late now#I’ve been thinking of keeping the general idea and make something else with it but I just can’t. Everything related to this idea gets#blocked by my brain
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Apparently I can meet my goal of roughly 400,000 words in 6 months if I just somehow write at least 2,200 words a day ghbjh... Almost 2,500 today... huzzah...
#Definitely not going to be able to stick with it just due to like... being realistic about my energy levels and etc. ESPECIALLY as we#enter the Evil Summer and it becomes hot all the time. But... one can attempt.. at least...#I'm also a very slow writer since I tend to re-read and edit while I write. and only move onto the next section once what I'm writing#seems okay. Which is easy for visual novel type stuff. since ''sections'' of a conversation are more clearly marked (like if you#have a menu option with 5 different dialogue choices. finish the character's response for choice 1 before moving onto 2. etc.)#Especially since when I'm done with a whole quest I always follow it up by playing through it and picking every option and making sure it#actually all works okay and etc. So I am already going to see it all a second time. Then I can go back and reorder a few words or remove#certain sentences that don't sound natural when I read them out loud (I always read it all outloud to myself since it is... just peple#talking.. it should sound like natural dialogue in their voice. etc). But my ''first draft'' is kind of not as first drafty since I pause t#edit a lot as I go along. So it also takes longer probably than it would take other people who I think treat a first draft as more#of a loose guideline or something. AANYWAY...#80F in my bedroom right now again... huzzah... I did end up finishing and recording that sims build video before the heat wave (or is#it really a heat wave if it's just summer..?? lol) came in.. but now... augh.. the editing... plus the costume photos and all else... Much#to do as always.. Often such a long todo list.. a giant scroll hung upon the walls of the evil hermit wizard tower..#Anyhow.. I hope I can finish getting ready for bed early in time to reward myself with a game of tripeaks solitaire whilst I snack on#cheddar cheese and some of those preserved artichokes in a jar. hrgm... I actually have nasturtiums (ultimate best flower) on the#deck again this year but I had to move them all into a corner today because the leaves were getting burnt by the sun lol.. Also am now more#cautiously weaving through social media to ignore all dragon age news. NOT bc of spoilers (I actually love spoilers/literally never play#any game until there's full guides on it I can read to plan my entire playthrough based on knowing exactly what I want to happen lol + mods#and etc.) but just because I'm so busy with my ownprojects I simply do not have the brainspace to dedicate... Yes I love to think#about elves and fictional universe lore. but no.. I pretend I do not see it. Does not exist to me actually. ghgj.. OHH also took som#cool pictures of flowers in the garden section of a store and I wanted to do like.. character designs based on the colors of the flowers o#something. but that might just be another unnecessary project to add to the pile.. I want to commit to the daunting task of dyeing my#hair again some time.. hrm.. this is all of the updates I can think of. As if a bunch of random tags make up for never posting anything for#weeks on end lol.. alas.. too warm to think properly I suppose.. .. I neeeeeed a long lost relative to leave me some million dollar#estate in their will so I can have the resources to move to a colder climate or something ..augh#.. but for now.. I shall toil away in my little wizard tower trying to write 2000 something words a day whilst sweating and such ghbj
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Hey y'all! I am feeling like making a poll or two, so I'm looking for suggestions for things to put on either my "what to make next" poll or "which pattern to share next" poll Options of things to make include but are not limited to a cuddly owlbear! A capybara! A goose! A poison apple! An isopod! another giant octopus, or pretty much whatever?
#the person behind the yarn#I mean first I need to finish four coasters#a baby quilt#and a bucky bear (already got all the fabric cut out for that one)#but I should be able to get the baby quilt done tomorrow if my blood pressure lets me#and if not I should be able to finish the coasters and make a good start on the bear#so if I go for a week long poll for each option#I should be able to let them run for a few days#get started on the first poll forerunners#and then by the end of the week start on the second place winners
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today is arnold lobel's birthday, creator of these guys:
#and on day one of zukka week no less....it's all coming together#retgmt zukka wouldnt exist without them. the blueprint.#anyway sorry i dont have anything new to share at the moment#working on alley cat pt. 2 but idk if ill be able to finish it this week#if you have time today you should either: read a frog and toad story or watch the new apple tv series. it's adorable#lobel was a gay man and died in the 80s after complications from AIDS. and he left behind stories with so much love in them.#they are worth reading even as adults in my humble (and correct) opinion
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I don't feel goooood :(
#I've been really nauseous for like. over a week now#two weeks? what is time#but anyway. that and ive been having some like really deep thoughts about my mom since her surgery#and my dad keeps being a dick and I should be able to do more around the house#to help them out but I'm so fucking tired. and my back hurts. and I'm sad.#and the nausea. as before mentioned.#and I have a therapy appt on Thurs and a psychiatrist appt next week#and I haven't been doing any of the things I should#and I'm really upset about that because they're gonna be disappointed in me#it's all so embarrassing and shameful.#and I'm 23 and unemployed and I didn't finish college#and my rooms really messy but I don't ever have the energy to clean it#which is just making me feel even more useless and grubby and pathetic#and I'm fat and I'm never gonna be able to do anything about it#and my skin hurts all the time in eight different places#and today we went out to do something important but I forgot the papers#and then I was going to the wrong place and I missed like 3 turns in a row#I've been having a really fucking hard time lately#but it feels like I say that all the time. so.#whatever I'm sorry to rant#to show therapist
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Hmm. Just realizing that I still have both the poster and the pre-chapter art to do for chapter 5.
...Maybe I should once again give myself another extra week of prep time.
#Hayley Writes Triangulum#Maybe I should just shoot for a three-week period between posting chapters#One week I post them here; the next I post them over on Ao3#And then I spend the final week trying to get everything wrapped up/finished for the next one#I'd love to be able to get a chapter up on at least ONE site each week but it might simply not be doable#Plus this way people have time to actually READ them#We'll see where I'm at by the end of this upcoming weekend
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Rushing to get the last 15 or so levels of my catalogue so I can send in my joy cons for repair
#devin speaks#devin’s gaming logs#my joy cons have become unbearable#the right ones are pretty bad but the left ones are almost completely unusable with their drift#i want to send them for repair but alas the repair will take 10-16 days and i will not be able to play splatoon while i wait#so i must quickly finish the catalogue so i can get the beloved earring and black boots i missed last year#ill be sad that i cant play side order either but honestly i probably wont be able to enjoy it anyway with my joy cons as is#so yeah must hurry to finish catalogue. must get these confounded controllers fixed……………..#i suppose i should invest in a pro controller again#the wired one i have also has a major drift problem#and the wireless one i had got rusted in the battery compartment somehow despite me never leaving batteries in there for longer than like#two or so weeks (i played with it a lot so the batteries constantly had to be replaced)#but the wireless one never did have a drift problem so maybe i will get another one and just be more careful with the batteries i guess??#idk whatever tag ramble done im just so frustrated with how poorly made joy cons are
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Found a couple of early reviews for Apostles of Mercy! Mild spoilers ahead:
Also, if you pre-order the book in any format you can show the publisher your receipt to get a free bookplate signed by the author!
Personally I got the e-book so that it will appear on my kindle the day it is released and I can have my heart broken immedately (affectionate).
#yeah i'm shilling for these sad sad alien books because i want the fourth and fifth ones to get published#the first two installments were some of the most engaging books i've ever read#i was able to finish each of them in a week respectfully even though i'd been going thru a long-term reading slump#like they won't be for everyone but they were instant hits for me and i think you personally should give them a chance#noumena#apostles of mercy#axiom's end#truth of the divine#science fiction#book recommendations#book review#book reccs#lindsay ellis
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...
#today has been a day. as in time did pass. the earth rotated. and i accomplished very little#bc im just feeling paralyzed and not so good. and i guess thats understandable#like i understand y its happening but its not any less frustrating. mostly its just knowing that i have to make life altering decisions in#the next few weeks. and the pressure of: if i dont decide to go for this one project then they dont get a student and they dont get funding#that makes me pretty nauseous. and knowing i have an interview Thursday that im not ready for and i dont really wanna do#and its a product of not talking to people like a human being. like i just dont interact with people much. when im in the lab i mostly#stand around looking unapproachable or go in when i kno there's no one there and i just dont have close friends so i dont really talk to or#text anyone. i just work and fail to get things done. so then when im in a situation where i have to talk to ppl its all anxious shrapnel#or me dominating the conversation bc i cant stand the pauses and i have so much obsessivly rotatinf in my head. and i hate it. im so sick#of hearinf my own voice but no one talk in the way i want them to. i get so bored. and i want to ask pressing and uncomfortable things but#i kno i shouldnt. but i also dont really have a filter so ill just say fucking whatever. which is what i did Saturday when a triggering#topic of conversation arose. so now my lab mate officially knows too much. but whatever wtf is he gonna do abt it. i just get so annoyed#bc now its in my head. thr fact it set me off and that i overshared and that now its in my head. annoying.#and it doesn't help with the writing things i need to finish. bc i dont like feeling like ive done something wrong and one of the reviewers#has good points. which also probably means ill have to redo my 8 days of measurements so far#but i also might b able to shorten the timeline so idk. just a lot is happening rn and i feel the pressure and by brain doesn't like#pressure. and not doing things rn is not good. things need to be done#so idk i dont feel good but it makes sense. by the end of February hopefully things will b figured out#and i should sleep and hope for a better tomorrow#unrelated
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sigh
#TMI warning#tags are a whole mess :/#I don't want to go on this trip anymore. the dynamics are whack out of order#and if I say anything about it it's me /not coping well/ and /being selfish/. bc we can't risk upsetting him. I know he has it hard too.#I'm not discounting that this trip will be awful in a different way for him. But at the end of the day he gets to go home and forget#forget how much idk. that's up to him ig#and we get to return to this hellhole. we had no internet today: none. god knows why. no power for 4 hours#no quality assurance: the toothpaste is rotting our teeth#no public pest control: I've got bites that we can't identify from falling into an unmarked half-finished road repair#and the fever i got from them just went away. after a week. and nobody could do anything bc antipyretics are in short supply#I don't want to play nice anymore :) bc he doesn't understand and making him understand would be mortifying#showing him how desperate his former partner's family really is. we'll need to borrow his credit card to do essential shopping#while on our so-called fun and games trip#bc we can't take much money out of the country and they don't accept IR cards there. so.#we'll be buying fucking toothpaste and underwear using his card and /paying him back/ using my aunt's money#which he holds#it's all so fucking sordid and degrading#soul-crushing#vent#.txt#idk if I should be posting this#esp to main... maybe we'll shunt it to the vent blog#esp esp bc I'm hurting and it's 3AM and I'll regret it in the morning probably#but what I wouldn't give for one person to understand it all and not turn away from me in embarrassment#what I wouldn't give to feel able to crawl out of this mess. worthy of crawling out of it. even if it was make-believe for a moment.#really bad post J. really really bad. I still want to post it.
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#OUghh... I've been really sick the past few days like not able to keep food down and had to go to the hospital#to get iv fluids and etc. to stay hydrated lol...#perhaps some sort of stomach virus or something. but still very grrrr for it to happen in the middle of the evil summer of#course#when everything is hot and uncomfortable anyway.. I really wanted to get a sims video and costume pictures finished this week and keep#up writing like 1000 ish words a day for my game. but.. alas... the universe was like... I Think Not#I at least have been able to have some tea and juice and applesauce and like 4 saltine crackers today so#I always think it's funny when you're ill what sort of little things count as successes#like on any normal day eating a few crackers would just be something you don't even give a second thought#to . But when you're really sick it's like .. WOW.. I ate TWO crackers.. amazing.. huzzah... I should get an award certainly#call the press and alert them. I should be in the newspaper headlines for this harrowing feat. etc. lol#I still feel very shaky and weak though.. but am like... hhhhh... when can I work on my projects again...#Also I literaly never leave the house or have contact with anyone so maybe it's not a virus and was more food poisioning or something#since I'm not sure where I'd get a virus even but... regardless... stinky#just complaining since I suppose that is what personal blogs are for lol. I'm a private person in the sense of wanting to proect my identi#ty and like.. I dont want an alexa in my house listening to me all the time and I dont tag my real location on social media or share photos#that could reveal the front of my house or etc. etc. But in all other senses I really don't beleive in holding stuff in. Because it will#just fester. especially when it has to do with other people (like relationship issues or something) but even when its just stuff that only#has to do with you. If something annoys me then I shall let it be openly known. if I'm bothered it will be clear. etc.#Which I guess makes me seem like a Hater And Complainer but I guess I just feel like its better over all to explain and express openly#than to just silently stew and hold everything in and then probably feel worse for it later or something.#Expressing annoyance is kind of like casting the concept off from yourself and releasing it into the wild so that you're not harboring it#anymore. all grievances must be aired eventually. etc. this is a Pro complaining zone lol#If you feel like shit dont hide it. just go 'man I feel like shit'. etc. etc. Cast it off into the universe. be free#ANYWAY... aughhh......... the wizard has fallen ill in his stinky little tower.. pacing the stone floors in tattered robes. hair disheveled#. carefully sipping a single cup of tea over the course of an hour lest drinking too fast upset his fragile stomachs againe..
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I need to figure out stuff to do sometimes soon I'm wasting away indoors
#dan talks#even more than like the day to day bad mental health of not going outside#it's like im just continuing my life being on pause. uni changed nothing#I still live in the same house where i cannot function bcs its dissociation station all day long#but i cant move out either bcs i cannot take care of myself or the space on my own#not to mention the obvious issue of money (cannot work)#lots of people in my life moving around doing new things living their messy complex lives#not me tho just a decade of nothing#no memory no change#i used to dream abt moving out but the closer i get to finishing uni and having to get a job#the more i realise it might just not happen? not scrapping the idea but yeah#im incapable of attending uni a few hours a week there is no way ill be able to do a 9 to 5#thankfully it's not a 'kick ur kids out at 18' thing here or id be dead#god and watching ppl make lifelong connections in uni#meanwhile i know like 3 people and barely tolerate them purely bcs i need a network#to keep up w stuff when im too disabled to come in#a couple people besides are fun but it's not rly friendships so much as uni friendships#there was this one trans person i wanted to be friends w but they didn't like me so alas#i cannot keep up with hanging out and cafes and bars and whatnot#maybe hiking was shooting too high (decently far needs too much planning)#maybe i should start w that open cinema or a museum visit#smt that's a simple bus ride away#or finally go to the botanical garden that didnt manage to agree on w friend#before it gets too cold#or the zoo...
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vimeo
{D I G I M O N} 02 - @.M.V x "Kocchi wo Muite" {"Look This Way"} M U S I C (C) C.L.A.M.P / K O D A N S H A (Originally from: C a r d c a p t o r S a k u r a) + DAIHIKA
Summary:
"Although you show C O U R A G E, YOU'VE{?} got it B A C K W A R D S A {m a i d e n}'s H E A R T is {f r a g i l e} and T R Y I N G..."
D i g i m o n 02 (C) T O E I @.M.V. by Me No $$$ is being made off this Fan-work
Notes: -This part took about 45 min already. - Aiming for an 08-02 finish, but let's see what happens...!! - This @.M.V. is overall a Stand-alone work. (It is not directly involved with my other work); However, it can be considered a work For the storyline that's a precursor to Repeat-verse, which came before that story was conceived!) Therefore, it can be watched as a Stand-alone! - I reused a part of an older edit for the Tri P.V.; (for timing placements) it had an old subtitle on, but I'll remove that for the finished version! However, the work is overall/near-wholly 02-focused (so far)!
{I have not yet re-written the DaiHika storyline involved with the past fic-verse of mine; So please take this work as a sort of preview to it!}
(Further lyric{s} under 'read more'!)
"Turn this way, don't look anywhere else, darling It'd be bad if you weren't completely by MY side... Although you show courage, you've got it backwards A maiden's heart is fragile and trying---"
If we get separated by any distance I'll come after you
(J.P.N): Kocchi wo muite yo So mi shinaide Daarin Chanto watashi no soba ni inakucha dame da yo Tsuyogari datte uragaeshi Otome-gokoro kyun to setsunai...
Donna ni tookute hanarete 'te mo Oikakete 'ku wa---
NOTE: The speaker may be speaking as if theyre NOT BEING CONSISTENT with their {FEELINGs}.
(Please acknowledge Rules BEFORE INTERACTING) {Failure to regard Rules WILL RESULT IN A BLOCK}
#daihika#hikasuke#hikadai#hikarixdaisuke#hikari x daisuke#coftffverse#coftff#chosen of faith: the fan fic#fic: chosen of faith#coftff daisuke#coftff hikari#coftff daihika#coftff timeline: pre meeting hikaru+post daisuke meeting shane#coftff timeline: from highschool to university for 02 chosen#daihika manifesto#(this is going to be t HE DAIHIKA m ANIFESTO)#(IF I CAN EVER FINISH THIS CONCEPT AND IF W.M.M WILL LET ME)#(SO FAR its goin well but I have Doubt)#(IF I CAN FINISH I will be fixing timings where possible so THIS IS A VERY EARLY r OUGH d RAFT OK---)#(I Had to reuse an old edit's timing that has a subtitle on but I will try to fix that for the finished version!!!)#(A.K.A. HI I LOVE YUKANA NOGAMIs v OICEWORK SO MUCH)#(ALSO A.K.A HI HOW IS THIS STILL THE C O O L E S T C.C.S s ONG-)#(BEST CASE s CENARIO)#(I'll be able to reuse this out-line for ACTUAL C.C.S W O R K--)#(Thats provided it ACTUALLY LETS ME FINISH THE t HING)#THIS 02 WORK REQUIRES CRITICAL THOUGHT#(But after seeing multiple n OT GREAT TAKES ON FAVS these past few weeks in general)#({mainly due to me stumbling on them accidentally while looking for ACTUAL WORK ABT FAVs})#(I AM USIN THIS AS MY m ANIFESTO FOR T H E MTM AND IM n OT sORRY---)#(**YOU SHOULD BE** r EADIN BETWEEN THE LINES on this one pERHAPS---)
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