#i see this tactic more than another to discredit people

[soreiya]

Please do not include my name in call out posts. Especially ones that use out of context screenshots. It all feels like some sick tactic to try to discredit my opinion and dissuade others from interacting with me. This whole ‘all is one’ conspiracy theory is getting out of hand. Why is anyone even feeding the trolls in the first place? I mean come on people… This is one of the first things you should learn as a fandom newbie.

Let’s think about this logically.

If someone is creating multiple accounts in an attempt to say that all TtS anons are in fact the same individual. Then aren’t they basically taking a roundabout way of disproving the whole argument? Unless this person would like to include themselves in the list. Either way I'd still like to see all of the actual compiled evidence that has lead to this conclusion. Otherwise it's nothing more than speculation. We really don't need everyone to start pointing fingers at one another over something like that. From my personal experience with Cheerio, I can safely say with certainty that they are not the same person as Crystal, or Zany. I mean this person is pretty unhinged. They also have an unhealthy obsession with uwu uke Varian. Like to the point of sending death threats to fans who have different opinions. Crystal can be a little invasive sometimes. She has a fetish for donkey transformations. She also tend to send the same copy pasted message to most Varian fans. It's almost like an initiation to the fandom at this point. "Are you taking any Tangled the series Varian story/art requests?" From what I have seen, her requests can be pretty violent, or a bit morbid. Though more often than not it's donkey Varian.

Zany just seems to like giant macho men. Out of the three, they have been the most open to criticism. None of the others have sent apologies or in depth messages explaining things. So I respect them for that.

[unfoldingmoments]

The Three Highly Effective Tactics of a Conversant Christian

Tactic #1: Relate (Personalize the Conversation)

We usually go into a challenging conversation with guns blazing. Our objective is to straighten the other person out. But when was the last time that worked for you? Coming in too hot will only burn bridges. Proverbs 18:19 states, “A brother offended is more unyielding than a strong city, and quarreling is like the bars of a castle.” Translation? You will get nowhere by ticking the other person off. No one, I mean no one, responds well to attacks or insults.

As an advocator, your job is to sincerely understand the other person’s point of view, not to make off-base accusations. You do this by conversing with them, not lecturing them. Your approach is to honor them as a person made in the image of God—not disparage them if they don’t conform to your point of view.

Tactic #2: Investigate (Analyze the Conversation)

People have different backgrounds. Different ways of seeing things. Different temperaments. So you will need to do some investigative work to learn more about them in your endeavor to have a productive conversation which involves asking good questions. What exactly is it that you believe? What are some experiences or life lessons that have shaped your thinking on this issue? Are you open to hearing another perspective? Asking questions demonstrates curiosity and openness, and any person feels complimented when they sense you respect them enough to learn from them.

Tactic #3: Translate (Harmonize the Conversation)

As the conversation draws to a close and before you part ways, your job is to harmonize the conversation by answering three critical questions: (1) What did we learn? (2) Where do we agree? and (3) Where do we go from here?

Thoroughly repeating back the other person’s position will say a lot to them. It shows them you care, you listened, and you take these matters very seriously. Always remember that your intention was never to change the other person’s mind. If they remain disagreeable, make it known that you agree to disagree. If the two of you need space, then agree to that. If, however, you both felt the conversation cleared up some confusion and you want to continue dialoguing, then commit to doing so. Discussing the next steps forces the two of you to evaluate not only the conversation but also the relationship. After discussing where to go from here, end the conversation with prayer.

What about becoming an advocator engages you? What rubs you the wrong way?

“The one who gives an answer before he listens – that is his folly and his shame.”

‭‭Proverbs‬ ‭18‬:‭13‬ ‭NET‬‬

“Instead of being motivated by selfish ambition or vanity, each of you should, in humility, be moved to treat one another as more important than yourself.”

‭‭Philippians‬ ‭2‬:‭3‬ ‭NET‬‬

“But as for you, communicate the behavior that goes with sound teaching. Older men are to be temperate, dignified, self-controlled, sound in faith, in love, and in endurance. Older women likewise are to exhibit behavior fitting for those who are holy, not slandering, not slaves to excessive drinking, but teaching what is good. In this way they will train the younger women to love their husbands, to love their children, to be self-controlled, pure, fulfilling their duties at home, kind, being subject to their own husbands, so that the message of God may not be discredited. Encourage younger men likewise to be self-controlled, and a sound message that cannot be criticized, so that any opponent will be at a loss, because he has nothing evil to say about us. Slaves are to be subject to their own masters in everything, to do what is wanted and not talk back, not pilfering, but showing all good faith, in order to bring credit to the teaching of God our Savior in everything. For the grace of God has appeared, bringing salvation to all people. It trains us to reject godless ways and worldly desires and to live self-controlled, upright, and godly lives in the present age, as we wait for the happy fulfillment of our hope in the glorious appearing of our great God and Savior, Jesus Christ. He gave himself for us to set us free from every kind of lawlessness and to purify for himself a people who are truly his, who are eager to do good. So communicate these things with the sort of exhortation or rebuke that carries full authority. Don’t let anyone look down on you.”

‭‭Titus‬ ‭2‬:‭1‬-‭6‬, ‭8‬-‭15‬ ‭NET‬‬

Challenging Conversations: Day 3 • Devotional https://www.bible.com/reading-plans/21359/day/3?segment=0

[hanzi83]

Just Another Mental Check In

I feel like because I am not focused on with whatever creative endeavor I do other than the people who have constantly tried to torment me online or in my life in general, I know those are the key people who pay attention to these published blogs so people can study my psyche and find ways to adjust tactics to make me feel like a piece of shit, and sometimes as a mentally ill person who can never shake off the mental trauma, especially when it is not important to the masses or not established on the surface, so this just feels like a fatso rambling in his parents basement while the people with good aesthetic can take their cheap shots and using my aesthetic to seem like I am the most pathetic person on the planet, but when I can see what the system does to people and changes their personalities to become more elitist and have enable shitty behavior, I don’t feel like these people can judge me as much as they think, you know how fucked up you have to be to think because you boast about the luxuries, the spoils, and the connections etc that you somehow think your narrative is the most important and you need cult members to enable that for you to feel like that is not sociopathic, and when I see that go on in the system and more people are recruited to become that, it becomes harder for me want to relate to anyone, I know I cannot confide to people who are from my past, no one in the present, any online connection I have made, because I feel they all answer to people who hold a lot of power, or they aspire to be those social characters and want the power to enable their bad habits, so I am stuck doing these blogs and maybe it is a gift that on the surface, I am irrelevant because I feel I can put these blogs and podcasts out since I am not gonna get any reaction to it. The very least it exists as something else I put out from the heart, even if many people don’t appreciate the shit I put out and have to ignore it, so I need the voices in my head to give me courage or pat me on the back when I do put in some work and the content. The reason why I am writing this blog this time, it is to kind of talk myself through my irrational feelings of feeling angry like I do every year when Mania comes around that I never got to go to one and not even go to the festivities, and more people who have gotten more rewards for their role in controlling me for the institution leaders behest even though I was the one who went through the on surface exploitation, and even on that same show, the fandom of that show who never agree with Stern about what he has done, they still downplay other people who contributed to the show on some level, but it is mostly met with just calling me crazy, doing the lyrics to the song of the parody about me and then the dedicated stalkers who then throw fear into me, they are the ones who make the posts on the Stern reddit when they need me to feel like shit because it will just be those people continuing to discredit and make me feel like shit and then I worry if I do get vindicated, that I have to be surrounded with people who have kept me in place so they could politic their position in my life, try to pitch their fucking comedy to me, then at the same time make me feel suicidal with undermining tactics and cheap shots, it just shows me partaking in the spoils has not made your mental health better, it feels like they are more controlling and feel entitled to every reward and opportunity for sex, and maybe do the system’s shit of doing quid pro quo, so you can’t support someone if there isn’t fuckability politics on the table. And I am the pussy who doesn’t want be like that, because everyone else is becoming that, and it feels like I am kept here for enough time until they fucking really need to eliminate me, they could’ve eliminated me a long time ago, but for some reason they keep me here and I think they have fun trying to fuck with me mentally and using advanced techniques to gaslight me. 

So I will say even though I blogged and podcasted through my irrational feelings, I feel like in context of how I have handle shit irrationally in the past, I did a better job than previous years, I know I still made irrational declarations of not watching wrestling or wanting to recap, but before I would be doing multiple lives and declare I want to kill myself and then have trolls encourage it while I am losing it because of the amount of mind games played. I still feel saddened at times and reflect on not selling out and being in my position and sometimes the system spoils and the flaunting people do make you instantly regret it, it becomes so fucking powerful. Right now there would be people who are tied to the system, allowed to have all the connections they want, who would mock this shit because “Bro you are taking this too seriously” but if you took away their connections, and their access etc, and the spoils as well, they would be handling shit worst than me, at least I know what it is like to always be treated like shit, know what it is like to look like shit, and always be taken down a notch, I almost become immune to it on some level but there is some more areas mentally they can figure out how to get at me, but if you many of the people who have gotten too comfortable with me being down and out and suppressed, had to deal with his constant shit, they would crumble and break down, they are lucky to have a support system. I don’t really have that, I just have this social media shit to paint my canvas that has the stench of cigarettes, and sadness. I might lay it on a little thick at times, but I am not the only one who can act a bit theatrical, especially when everything I have consumed in my life has been infested with theatrical shit, it is there constantly in my face all my life, so yeah there is a little of that in me, but I know my rep is not credible and no one for the most part gives a shit about me, or at least they don’t admit that, the only use they see in me, is that I might be owed money in the future and that is why I am of value on some fucking level, but I feel like if people don’t pay attention to me anyways or so they say even though the online shooters are always paying attention to anything written, I figure I can let off some of my feelings out there. I know you are supposed to be mocked for being vulnerable on the internet, but maybe I feel more comfortable doing it because I now have my guard up and expect people to do vulture like things and pile on my already mentally ill fat ass, and I know what kind of people they are, they hide their identity or do it behind the scenes if they are known, but because I expect the worst and imagine the possibilities in what these people can do or what they can say, I know they are not used to dealing with someone who is not relying on a script, so they become their own version of Chat GPT where if you give them a response they are not expecting, they malfunction and their worst comes out. They will get so triggered by this but with no sense of irony tell everyone else they are being sensitive. I can handle putting shit out there and hope it could help other mentally ill people who don’t know how to articulate it, because the system says they support mental illness but you can only recognize a certain kind of standard mental illness, not how being mentally ill while consuming damaging shit can help change your line of thinking, or how people in the system who say the worst shit against people of power might be doing it because those people are evil by default, so people who go off on mentally ill rants, already do it knowing the people they are going at are people who are not some innocent people who never said or did a bad thing, so the public will then say “being an asshole is not an excuse when being mentally ill” when that literally is a huge part of mental illness. So I know how people are used as cogs in the system and I feel for some of these people, the ones who are cogs and want to perpetuate the system’s nastiness and shitty behavior, I have less empathy for because they get cocky of having the connections, being protected, they can threaten violence or try to organize someone’s demise, some people will present themselves as anti establishment but if you lie about narratives and ride off the fact that you call out evil in limited ways, I can’t trust everything you say if you would even lie about the narratives, because in other situations that are beneficial towards you, then you might try to fool people for the worst. 

I know I lead a sad life, but maybe I stopped caring because everyone is getting worse and while also looking better, and because I see this shit going down the way it does, I would rather be dead, like not that I would try to do it myself, but just hope that the end is coming and maybe I will have a new life in a new world, maybe one of the other versions of me in the fucking multi verse will show up or some shit, who fucking knows, but as each day passes and I find myself not being able to get away from this entertainment shit, I start to hate myself, I start to hate myself for even wanting to be part of the cool club and have unlimited access but only if I partake in an initiation that gets me canceled so I can justify going more to the right wing side. I don’t want to do it, and you will see more social climbers online reveal themselves to be on the fundamentalist side. Why would I want to be here for this shit. The world is going more to shit, I look at how entertainment has really trained us for shit that is unfolding on the political world, the repeated tropes. It is like between reality shows blurring the line between actual reality and sports entertainment, it has helped people who were reality show people then become influential in the real world because they use that sports entertainer shit to their advantage because we think everything on the surface is completely real and organic. These comedies and dramas showing you political thrillers basically trained you to be into what is transpiring in the fucking discourse right now, more characters being introduced to be a villain for a couple of episodes before the main villain overtakes him, like with this republican politician Asa Hutchinson, I don’t know about the specifics of what this person has been involved with, I can’t memorize the laundry list of shit he has been guilty of or whatever, but let me guess, the corporate democrats will amplify the theatrics of someone challenging Trump in any way while Trump loyalists then point out what he has done and what he is tied to, and they look more like truth tellers even though they seem to be covering for their favorite billionaire in Trump. But then we get sports entertainment with them calling each other names. It feels like the way this shit plays out makes us watch this from an entertainment lens and that is how much we have been brainwashed without realizing it. People who aspire to be cult leaders, they want that kind of brainwashing to exist, because they want to be able to do this shit that others have done. I am constantly faced with it, and then because I see other cogs becoming these people, I go off on them and I know that probably helps me make more enemies because I have this knack for really trying to get at people who do evil shit, but the predicament is they can’t admit they are watching me, because they feel it is punishment for me not to get engagement online or be acknowledge for anything, and yeah I will admit it hurts a bit that so much effort would be put in, but it is also telling that they would do this, because they are projecting what is the worst thing that could happen to them, if all that access etc was just taken away from you and no one was allowed to react to anything you put out because people who have power can decide when you are considered interesting,  like people constantly go off on  about hip hop being this destructive art form because on the surface there seems to be violence tied to it, and I can admit if you have mental illness and listening to music that has that kind of shit, it can shape your mind, but I hate how hip hop is thrown under the bus before all the other entertainment, because comedy has probably been the most destructive art form, people going to lengths to make people not laugh at other people to initiate them more, if you are not cool with the conservative talking points from the Cellar table, they have people in the industry kind of bully you or act like your comedy is the liberal agenda and it should be discredited etc, the fandom is conditional, like if you spew shit they want to hear they will overlook the horrible humor, you manufacture consent through comedy to have an elitist point of view, they become the biggest court jesters to the system, it is only obvious when it is liberal, but the edge lord shit is not considered agenda filled, the fact that everyone wants to be funny on their platforms shows you how watered down it has all become. It feels comedy has destroyed people’s minds more so than what hip hop has done, but one is just the mental aspect while the other art form is this perpetuation to some degree of violence and guns, and the artist has to take full accountability when this shit could be pushed by executives who get to play the white guy who doesn’t have rhythm. But when the system can decide you are allowed to be taken seriously or be seen credible, they will support one of many things you have said, so that you are encouraged without them saying it, to make more points like that and it will get a reaction, like on Stern me being a regular person and trying to be calm would get me on air but it wasn’t until Howard took interest in my rants or me being an edge lord to notice me, and then the mental illness in my head is “One of the more prominent people in media is laughing at this aspect of me” and I feel pressure to then have to play it up, even to my own detriment mentally. And now I see this happening to others on another level, and even though they will taunt me and try to fuck with me, I still shed a tear for them because they will keep doubling down but they will then not be able to control it, and within a second, all the industry interaction will go away once you are not relevant, and some of them are scared to be and this is why they gotta double down and be what the system wants them to be. 

I get into a groove of writing this shit down and get mad I expressed shit better than I did on the podcast, and then try to remember these points so I say them on the fucking podcast. But I felt I needed to vent this shit out. I know it is not supposed to catch traction, but I am trying to get into the groove of trying to write more often because sometimes it is easier to read this shit than hear me trying to spit it out. I am getting to the point, and I am sure people who hate me would love to hear this since they can continue this madness, but it is like every day I wake up and I feel disappointed I didn’t go in my sleep, I wonder what shit storm I am gonna wake up to, and how the world is getting worse, and even if I was well off, I still think of innocent people that will be fucked, and there is already this pre designed decisions made that ensures people have no fucking chance, people that will be driven crazy by more unethical people, or in order to get your freedom, you have to dumb yourself down and become a fucking parody and be exploited for the purpose of social currency etc, so we have pretentious discussions that will be talking ourselves in circles, because there is no room for solutions, just for more ways for this shit to just implode. I think because we look at the aesthetic as the main indicator of what someone is etc, people think that people who are being lured into giving into these superficial lifestyle means someone is free, when that is just to paint it nice to show you their fancy lives so you wouldn’t think cogs in the system are mentally enslaved to an exploitative system, we limit the narratives of how controlled people are and how beholden they are to their favorite cult in politics and entertainment, that they get in line, once and awhile one of them will lose their mind if they are thrown under the bus because they need a couple of sacrificial lambs, but the cult then acts like that is just some random crazy they never had association with, and you will notice the sacrificial lambs seems like they feel they are entitled to the access and their favorite celeb’s time, and to regular people, that shit seems creepy because these celebs are just regular people, but you find this happening more and more, and it makes me question what the fuck is going on in the industry. I know I am going off on random tangents, but I wanted to write shit down, because I am always feeling like a piece of shit, and I know I don’t help matters, but at certain times I wonder, do I need to be at my best or look my best when this world is imploding. I can’t confirm where the future is headed and maybe I should be concerned with that more so than the entertainment that has taken control, I am not saying you can’t genuinely enjoy entertainment but when there is this scary cultish behavior revolving around it, and now more than ever on the social media shit, we are seeing the far right being propped up, so now every fandom for entertainment these people show themselves, it would be difficult for me to sense what someone’s politics were when I was younger or why it mattered, so it never seemed as bad if we were all into the same shit, and now I look at how people run for defense for their favorites., and it brings me back to when I was really dumbed down and would support guys like Vince or Howard because I was not looking at what their politics were and why it mattered when it was just entertainment. So now I see how this politics plays a part in everything we consume, I just needed to vent because I am trying to prevent more mental breakdowns, because corrupt people will do shit, I will vent then they get revenge by using their power to amplify ignorant shit that dominates the discourse, that is one of many advantages the powerful have over me, sure I can technically express myself, so they will use other tactics to get the masses to repeat shit with narratives so they can then make it constant and it will be out there and be the go to things people repeat over and over, if people like myself voice their concern, they need to control how society thinks, and the only people who hint shit about it are a lot of right wingers since a lot of apolitical people will fuck with that message and then they get lured in with more brainwashing etc. while the democrats come off more elitist by calling out certain powerful people, but under a more imperialism mindset, and no one wants to socially consign that rhetoric. I am passing out, I just recapped Mania, and was gonna record it, but I wanted to write another blog to get this shit off my chest,  it feels like a remix of old blogs and podcasts. I tend to repeat myself unfortunately, I think sometimes because I don’t watch all the entertainment in the world, my motivation to take from other entertainment and use it in my everyday life because we all do, we will act like we don’t but we do, but it feels like I can’t pick from anything as much anymore as motivation, and I used to do that often and I would find myself having their mannerisms, and I try to hold out of doing that shit, but all of us on some level are performers and some will double down to be in that position but me, I think being kicked off the Stern Show helped me over the years to not end up a more of a pathetic wack packer mentally, looking for any way to get himself more viral  and help push me to desire to alone with my thoughts a lot more and not be motivated by being someone going after clout nonstop, my thoughts are background noise and lurking but not focused on because the people who get their high off the adrenaline of getting viral and more social equity so they then double down with that recipe and then having to top yourself because there will be other people competing for the attention, that’s what it ends up becoming and everything falls apart. So It is what it is. I never know the point of these blogs, but if it is just there for people to laugh at and get a kick out of because I am expressing myself when I am at low points of my mood, and they love to be assured I am not feeling good.

[cosmicanger]

❍

❍ “Reminder that in 2020, the first two weeks of rebellion were not led by Leftist orgs/milieus. Leftists joined the fray late and largely engaged through a range of tactics, from support for the militants to general agitation + conscientization. Others moved counterinsurgent tho. These, alongside the regular old conservative political guard, typical pacifist liberals, radlibs looking for photo ops, the buy black and black business crowd, the fascists and sinophobic anti-vaxxers, the pigs, & these companies all worked in different ways to coopt the energy. Alot of what we are seeing rn re: Tyre Nichols are strategies that I didn't see prior to summer 2020. They are also all culminations of strategies that have been being worked out against Black Rebellion for decades, most especially from the late 20th century onward.”

❍ “the idea that its only “white anarchists” who are militants when it comes to anti-police movements should be discredited by now. the idea that the only legitimate multi-racial organizing or activity is that happening in orgs that focus on policy should also be discredited by now.”

❍ “I think some wise activists have rightly pointed out that some actions have become liberal parades and serve no purpose. For whatever APTP is or will be, it does seem clear the organization and its leadership embraced NGO money and the org is now part of the system. We can’t achieve our goals by embracing liberalism and incrementalism. Rolling down the street behind a truck, standing around and then dispersing is the very definition of a liberal parade. That’s their choice and their type of action. Perhaps they will achieve some good with their NGO cash. That said, real change comes from the actions of people that fight and resist by all and any means. That much we know.”

❍ “we need ungovernable Black communities—not just from the State, but all extensions, functionally or by proxy, of it, including the NPIC and orgs/groups which prioritize hierarchy above all else. this is by far one of the most direct ways to reach the margins because these ungovernable communities are by definition distant from the structures and institutions that create that marginalization such as the police. they are where we are most safe.”

❍ “ppl who aren’t in the bay & have little to no experience with street movements in the bay, please read this. aptp leadership has been actively working against militancy in anti-police street movements before aptp was even a thing—only now they have a lot more $$$ thanks to their associations with the Tides (Foundation) Network and Cullors’s BLM™️. ppl unfamiliar with their history boosting them isn’t helping this worsening situation.”

❍ “imagine the amount of lost time and resources wasted by the NPIC and shitty "socialist" orgs that when not being antiBlack, they protect abusers and sexual assaulters.”

❍ “another way of saying that “you can’t reform this” is to say “you can’t defund this. you have to abolish it or it goes on.” ppl trying to “defund” literally got their messaging turned against them by both the gop & dems after the riots of 2020. you rlly can’t reform this… you cannot trick the state into slowly but surely disarming itself so that you can then take it down, too.”

❍ “so annoyed with the ppl bragging about how peaceful the protests are. it doesn't matter, fascists will not suddenly grow a conscience because you protest peacefully. you either destroy fascism or it will destroy you.”

❍ “this swift condemnation of Black cops has more to do with the fact that they’re Black and therefore can be scapegoated to pretend that reform is occurring, than it does with literally anything else, including the murder itself.”

❍ “anyone calling for more funding of police and military in this country is a fascist. it's someone who is condoning ongoing genocides. i don't care what party they claim.”

❍ “i'm so upset "defend the p*lice” ever came from the mouths of "abolitionists". it should've been defund or nothing.

❍ “the c*ps were gloating and bragging to each other over beating Tyre Nichols to death because that's what policing is about—the brutal lynching of Black people.”

[nesiacha]

@thatrosedose

Usually, I try to avoid conflicts and don't like historical debates involving personal history to prevent problems and because it's often irrelevant. However, this time, I will be a bit firm. I can be a coward, but some things cannot be overlooked.

Firstly, I am sincerely sorry for Albania, believe me even I don't know at all the history of Albania, so I I would refrain from commenting because I don't know . Being Franco-Algerian myself, I understand. My country, Algeria, suffered greatly under colonization since 1830 until his independance in 1962, and in some way, I try to remind people of the sufferings of our people and others like us. Nonetheless, I am equally proud to be French and like to recall that one of my ancestors died in the Battle of the Somme alongside other Frenchmen who never discriminated against him and suffered with him. However, I really don't see how this is relevant here. When I talk about the Algerian Revolution, it's to mention how some Algerians perceived the French Revolution and learned from other revolutions to... We can see some similarities in the course of events. The same applies to Albania. It could work if you talk about an era like 1850, the 20th century, etc., for better comparison. But that's stop it. Beyond that we fall into anachronism

I have the unpleasant impression, from your tone, that you are trying to discredit aedeslumini as someone with limited compassion which is false (forgive me if I am wrong, I will publicly apologize). And I must admit, I don't like this at all. It's like during a debate about Napoleon's reinstatement of slavery, I would start talking about Algerian colonization and the suffering of Algerians while another person is trying to present real historical arguments, such as the attitudes of colonists hostile to the abolition of slavery. It makes no sense, and rightly so, I would be reminded that these arguments are out of place. There are other historical arguments that should be advanced (and I say this while criticizing a lot Bonaparte for reinstating slavery because it was a grave mistake both morally and tactically). Even the historian Patrice Guennifey ( or Thierry Lentz I didn't remember), who clearly dislikes the Montagnards, rejects this dictatorial notion of some people and calls for avoiding anachronisms.

Next, I politely but firmly invite you to review where aedesluminis or others have approved what happened in Vendée. On the contrary, to my knowledge, we have all condemned these events. Regardless of our admiration for certain revolutionaries, we know well that those involved there or who did not disapprove were guilty of inexcusable acts (some did not have the same information because there were no telephones at that time, so by the time the information was verified, it could take at least two months). Flawless statesmen do not exist, and revolutionaries beyond reproach are very rare (perhaps Louise Reine Audu, Monnereau, Marie Anne Babeuf) because they were in a hellish situation in a war that most did not want, surrounded by foreign powers, deprived of sleep, and facing the atrocious punishments that royalists could inflict. Honestly, they tried their best to hold back until the gloves came off. They saved France, even though they committed inexcusable acts.

What is a bit annoying is that we don't talk a lot about the Overseas Departments, the atrocious repression in Haiti (it seems that nearly half of Haitians died, often in atrocious sufferings) which was even more horrible sometimes ( like the dogs or Rochambeau), and Napoleon's dictatorship in my opinion, with his thirst for power. He betrayed the Jacobins for this power in my eyes , which is even more unforgivable, and left France in a worse state. Louis XIV, Louis XV, and even Louis XVI were not above horrible repressions, and we don't talk about them as much. There is more talking than the exactions of the governement of Year II that them.

Also, I didn't understand what the American story is about.

In short, let's all try to remain calm. If you want, we can provide our sources and posts, but let's remain courteous.

[mushroomsandteeth]

And Remember Kids

If someone disagrees with you about your opinion on the Venom run and instead of giving reasons for why they disagree with you, they instead say your opinion is invalid because you are a symbrock shipper, that's ad hominem, a logical fallacy used to try and discredit people by attacking their person instead of giving an actual argument.

[koravelliumavast]

I am only about halfway through the first Wheel of Time book and I believe that Rand is very much autistic or ADHD/ADD coded and I have proof from the book that relates to my own personal instances.

From chapter one. Rand feels jittery whenever he talks to Egwene and doesn’t want to think about her much because he knows that she is aware of his thoughts for her.

He also has mentioned the flame and the void quite a few times after this instance so far in the book. This is definitely one of his mantras.

Here Rand is showing overstimulation. Baerlon is definitely louder and busier than the two rivers. He liked the monotony and routine of the farm life and it shows many more times that I have seen where he’s reminiscing on how simpler it was.

The stimming here could be nervous energy but also just the rocking on his heels really sets it off for me and the fact that hes kind of disassociating along with it. However Rand has a lot of energy and needs to get it out. This Stim isn’t only one that is somewhat small but it’s also something that people would mostly ignore which is really nice too. I hate drawing attention to myself and some of my stims definitely could do that but this one doesn’t. Both earlier and later on in the scene we can see Rand being more nonverbal. The lines

“Rand still rocked on his heels, waiting. The tingle was so strong that he almost quivered; he felt as if he were burning up.

Rand drew a deep breath, and abruptly it was all gone like a pricked bubble. He staggered as it vanished, the realization of what he had just done flooding in on him”

Also exemplify the stimming and nonverbalness that he has at the meeting with the Whitecloaks.

Even more overstimulation in chapter 19. Personally this one is less noticeable but he is like actively being killed or whatever.

Rand here is trying to fit in by imitating Lan. I wouldn’t say masking but he definitely feels like he’s out out place. Granted he is very out of place because having never left the two rivers, but still.

Rand likes to repeat himself things a lot as a self-soothing tactic. This is a thing that I do and it really helps when there’s too much going on but I can’t do anything about it. Rand has quite a few mantras that he says throughout the course of the book.

Here he is also blaming himself for failures that aren’t his fault. I don’t know if this is a common autistic trait but I do it all the time and it’s not a good habit to keep.

Here is another instance of Rand repeating things to himself for self-soothing and to stop him from spiraling out of control of things. Again I do this quite a bit in a number of settings when there are a large number of things that are out of my control that I can’t work with.

Rand here is soothing himself and trying to block out painful moments. I do that quite a bit. Rand also is kind of forcing himself to not talk because that would draw attention to him (which he doesn’t want at all)

Rand gets uneasy when people stare at him quite a lot. I get very uncomfortable whenever I have to make eye contact with people or I feel like people are staring at me. It makes me very uneasy and it’s very hard to shake that feeling but if I find my friends it’s easier to help with that feeling. Rand is doing the same thing here.

Here Rand is displaying very impulsive behavior that isn’t clearly thought out. I do that all the time and I truly feel like impulsivity is one trait that we can’t discredit when it comes to the autism spectrum. It’s definitely one that isn’t mentioned as much but it is still a problem.

In conclusion:

I’m excited to read more of the book series because i like the characters and I really relate to Rand. Also I watched the first episode of the show, went wait no I want to read the book and wow there are so many differences between the show and the book. Anyways I truly believe that Rand is on the autistic spectrum and that he needs a hug.

[lurking96]

Chapter 319 or why Bakugou might not be healthy for Izuku

This here might be a bit on the anti Bakugou side. I tagged it as such so you can filter those out and put it under a read more if you dont want to read it.

So. In the last day I did read a few opinions on the chapter leaks. What some think will happen and so on. Some from Pros some from Antis. This again is an opinion. It is not absolute. I do not claim it to be the absolute truth. This is just my personal interpretation. What I think that will happen is that Class 1A lead by Bakugou will fight Midoriya to try to bring him back. I don’t think talking to him will happen with Bakugou there. As one of Bakugous coping mechanisms is fighting. However with that come problems. I can understand the reasoning behind fighting him. A little talk will most likely not make him come back. However it might ease things. Might make him a tiny bit calmer. Might not make things worse. Fighting however will make things worse. Izuku is already on edge. He is already filled with paranoia. He hasn’t slept or eaten well. He might do rash decisions. He is not in a healthy mental state. And here we have it. His friends, his supposed allies are fighting him. The people he wants to protect went out and attack him. Out in their costumes. Ready for battle. A kinda scary scene overall. You dont see their faces. You feel anger coming from them.

It might bring some memories back to Izuku if you compare it with another picture.

Just like the picture before Bakugou is kinda in the foreground.He is leading just like back then he was leading his so called “extras” This might bring back memories to Izuku. Again he is sleep deprived. His mind might not work the sharpest. For all he knows it´s like back in his other schools where Bakugou lead his group of “extras” to attack Izuku. He might fight back stronger than intended. He might just try to flee even more. Overall it is not very helpful to him. Because a part of the reason for Izukus mental health is Bakugou. Not in a kind of friendship way but more as a cause. Bakugou to put it simply had been Izukus main bully. They were never apart. From preschool to UA. They were in the same class. With team exercises they were together. Izuku never had a break from him. He was never allowed to have time without him. From early on Bakugou has called him useless, worthless, what does one think the name Deku means. Has been using his quirk on him without the teachers caring. Before people say that is long ago. It is not. Right now they are in their second year. How did their first year start. Bakugou trying to attack Midoriya. Trying to kill him. Insulting him where he goes. It is not long ago. And even if it was like 300 or so chapters ago. That still happened. That is still the characters backstory. Honestly you are fine to like a character. But one should recognize that a character has flaws. No character is perfect. Saying that you like a character and saying that they are an asshole that needs to change can coexist. I like Overhauls aesthetic and quirk. Am I okay with what he did. Nope. Would I want him set on fire. Yes. Simple as that. Now back to it. In chapter 319 we hear Bakugou say that Izukus self sacrificial nature is caused by All Might. This. I do not agree with. Again. Who has called him worthless, a pebble on the road, useless, a deku for years. It was not All Might. Izuku has incredible low self worth. If it means saving a cat from a tree he would break his legs. He doesnt care for himself. He sees himself as worthless and only as somewhat useful when he is saving people. It got drilled into him from a young age. This is not something simple that is left behind after a few days. It can take years. And so far he has nothing contrary to those ideas. There are three people that know of his former quirklessness. His mom. Who is kinda supposed to love him. All Might who never really went back on the quirkless hero thing and Bakugou who still insults him for it. Everyone else only knows him with his quirk. Only knows him with being useful. Just because he has a quirk now doesnt mean that quirkless Izuku has ever left his mind. Yes All Might is not perfect. He has flaws. Those flaws are shown and others call him out. Could he have done more. Yes. Could he have helped him mentally. To a degree. But again. All Might is flawed. He is not perfect. All Might is shown to lack social skills. Seeing Bakugou just as rival or Endeavor who has open hate for him as friends. He never had a normal relationship. And again he was not the cause for Izukus psyche. He didnt lay the groundwork. With Bakugou blaming it on All Might. The guy that is not there and can’t protect himself he is doing something one could call damage control. He is not telling the entire truth. For the truth would hinder his dream of becoming number one and reduce his social standing. Him telling others that he is even partly responsible would surely open more questions later he would want to avoid. He also calls Midoriya crazy which is a tactic used to discredit a victim. Same for him making things up and overexaggerating and so on. He did do damage control before. A bit ago he told All Might that he was bullying Izuku in the past. You would think It´s something positive. But here is the thing. He lacked details. He didnt tell him much. For all we know All Might assumed some rough housing and name calling. Nothing that bad. It is to soften the blow. So if Izuku tells him later All Might is already in the mindset that it wasn’t so bad. Bakugou seems not that he would lie and my successor must be overexaggerating a bit. Bakugou is not that dumb. He knows his way around words. He knows when to not openly attack and wait for a better chance. A fool would have kept attacking Izuku after Aizawa held him back. He was just waiting for the training with All Might. He knows what buttons to push to get information out of Izuku. He basically forced the OFA secret out of him. One could call this a good use of crocodile tears if they so want. If they dislike him that much. Again an opinion of many. As of Chapter 319. He might have good intentions. He might want something good for Izuku. But the road to hell is paved with good intentions. Good intentions are not an excuse. Just because Bakugou thinks it is the best doesn’t mean it will be automatically the best. Just because the dog wants the chocolate bar doesnt mean it will be healthy for anyone involved. Bakugou being there might be quite detrimental to Izukus health. He might just open up wounds again. Izuku fighting class 1A would probably not increase his trust. And what are they going to do if they win. Tie him up, drug him, force him back. He will just try to escape. His trust in them will be broken. He might allow some sleep but it will never be the same. He already had trust issues before this will just expand them further. Isolate him further. This is what AFO wants. To have the heroes fighting with eachother. To have the OFA holder isolated and even branded as Villain for fighting as hero class. 1A winning is also a big IF. Shigaraki fought Gigantomachia and the MLA sleep deprived and incredible tired and won. Shigaraki and Izuku are foils. Two sides of the same coin. Izuku had a year to analyse their quirks. He has a bunch of quirks for himself and OFA mastered far more than anytime before he trained with them. He has become a natural disaster in human form. It wouldn’t be a surprise if he defeats them and leaves. To me the good option would be trying to talk to him. Not let Bakugou do the talking. He lacks the fine control. Get him in the direction of rest. Sadly none of them are trained professionals to deal with mental health. They are children that just fought in a war and also got traumatised. So I dont have great hope on them taking the talking route. Overall I think this will be a breaking point. They will fight. Izuku will most likely win and his trust will be broken even more. He will be even more isolated. His personality might take a darker turn seeing as there is no one he can trust. It might just get even darker than before.

[arcticdementor]

It may be a virtue to be difficult to lie to, but on the other hand, as Jim Donald recently put it, "being in contact with reality is a bad career move."

I'm not sure how you rectify this from within.

Me neither. But then, I also don't see how you rectify it from without.

The obvious way would be to reduce the stakes of competition by making a good life more accessible, so speaking truth doesn't lead to massive losses in earnings, which means more people do it, which makes it less of a source of vulnerability, which disincentivizes self-interested attacks.

Except status is relative, and like Malcom Kyeyune points out, much of this is driven by an overproduced PMC elite competing for a smaller number of acceptable positions, the "acceptability" not being so much a matter of material comfort as being compatible with their social class — you might be materially richer working a skilled trade in a middling town in flyover country, than as an intern doing spreadsheets in Excel for a lefty NGO and sharing a tiny apartment with six roommates in NYC or San Francisco, but anyone in the latter would see the former as an unthinkable fall, constituting failure at life, and potentially a fate worse than death. (Much like how even the most impoverished aristocrat of old would sooner slit his wrists than lower himself to going into trade.)

I think most people around here agree that this situation is a problem, but we disagree on whether the best course of action is to attack that system from outside, or to convince the players that being truthful is good.

And I don't think either of these are viable courses. For one, how would you go about attacking this system from outside? For another, it's hard to convince someone of something when his job depends… et cetera, et cetera. The longer passage from Jim:

The managerial state reinforces leftism, because being in contact with reality is a bad career move, and leftism reinforces the managerial state, because leftists do not like people telling them that reality is real, and both of them reinforce demon worship, because demon worshippers are fine with actual reality going to $#!&. All three depend on lies, each of them provides a different reason for lying, but a lie promulgated for one reason finds support from the other two reasons. The bureaucrat wants the right bullet points regardless of whether the bullet points meaningfully represent reality, the leftist does not believe that existence exists, that reality is real, and the demon worshipper just likes lies and lying.

When you get promoted based on bullet point checklists, the best strategy is to embrace Goodhart's Law wholeheartedly. When you get promoted based on being a "team player," outsourcing your belief-formation system to the social consensus is a winning move. (I had a therapist who endorsed "just believe whatever your peers believe because your peers believe it" as the height of healthy human cognition, "reading the room" is our primary task in life, and that caring much about "truth" or "reality" independent of fitting in with the crowd itself constitutes a form of mental illness to be overcome.)

In my view, forcing this system to take a loss reduces the positive incentives

Sure, except you have no way at your disposal to force them to take a loss. It just can't be done.

while discrediting the idea that "this is the most effective tactic," which is used to support the current equilibrium.

And it's very hard to "discredit" an idea when it's true. They believe "this is the most effective tactic" because it is the most effective tactic, and you're not going to change that.

My view is that there are feedback loops within the system which make it less likely to self-correct…

I agree with this whole bit. I just don't see how you get correction from outside, either, except total collapse.

What it boils down to is an estimate of risk. I think we should call the disruption early, because it means that the magnitude of the disruption will be lower.

This whole thing here is dependent on the idea that you can "call the disruption" at all. Yes, the longer this goes on, the worse it will get, for all the reasons you lay out. But there's nothing we can do about it. Those feedback loops are just going to keep on churning, impervious to any attempts to prevent it, until the final, catastrophic explosion that takes all of human civilization with it.

Progressives place a very high value on social approval. "All the right institutions are saying this, all the right people are saying it. Read the room. Don't be socially clueless."

I've been thinking about how to say this in less than 10,000 words, and I think the short version goes like this:

Being difficult to lie to is a virtue.

[snafu-maniac1]

Zuko deserved better

So I rewatched Avatar the Last Airbender recently and let me tell you......

I wanna murder several people.

Looking back on this entire series I’ve come to notice something. I watched the show just like any other audience member and only saw the good and the bad characters. One of these prime examples is Zuko. Zuko’s redemption arc has been praised as one of the greatest in history, succeeding where others have failed. But watching it all again......it wasn’t redemption. Not to me personally.

Before everyone gets angry and defensive at me, please finish reading my post and hear what I have to say. I do not wish to start any fandom wars or discredit or disrespect anyone’s opinion, this is just my personal psychological analysis of Zuko’s character....Sigh and let me give you a warning.

It’s gonna be LONG. 

So if you’re not interested or don’t want to hear it or don’t feel like reading something this long that’s fine, you can go ahead and just click away and ignore this post.

Starting from book 2. 

Now you may be wondering why I’m starting here and not from the start of Zuko’s childhood but I first want to address the one question everyone had been wondering since the series 2 finale. What would have happened if Zuko hadn’t sided with Azula?

My answer is.....that wouldn’t have happened.

Everyone’s been focusing on the entire arc where Zuko was struggling to accept that the war was wrong and how Iroh was trying to get through to him when he tried to capture Appa and afterwards, but here’s something everyone tends to ignore.

Why didn’t Iroh try sooner?

Why didn’t he try to stop Zuko before Aang came, before he’d gotten so deep and desperate to the point that he continuously committed heinous acts to capture the Avatar? People would justify it by saying Iroh wanted Zuko to realize the wrongs of his father and Nation by himself to shape him into his own person. But that is in no way the appropriate way to approach a physically, psychologically and mentally unstable and abused child. Zuko was a thirteen year old boy when he was burned and banished. This is where we go into his childhood. Zuko was raised like any other Fire Nation citizen. As we’ve seen in book 3 and in the Pirate comic book, The Fire Nation citizens were led to believe that the other Nations were ‘savages’ and ‘barbarians’. It villainizes the Fire Nation even more. The very fact that they would spread heinous lies against other people when they themselves were responsible for the war that ruined so many lives. But when you realize, what Sozin and the other Fire Lords did was a solid battle tactic. Making the opposing side out to be these horrendous monsters. Making lies or accentuating every one of their worst traits to dehumanize their enemies so that the people would not have any qualms about fighting them. All of the Fire Nation schools were taught these lies. And Zuko was no exception.

Zuko was a member of the Royal family. And from what was shown in the Avatar series, the Royal family was isolated from the rest of Fire Nation society. Zuko had no way of knowing what the other Nations were really like, no way of knowing the truth about the war and no one had bothered to explain it to him. The one person that could have, did NOT. And yet people had expected him to just automatically know that he was being lied to and that his people were the villains. Zuko’s only social exposure was with Fire Lord Azulon, Fire Lord Ozai, Dragon Of The West General and Crown Prince Iroh, his cousin Prince Lu Ten, his mother Princess Ursa and his younger sister Princess Azula and her friends Mai and Ty Lee. All of whom believed in the Fire Nation propaganda and all of whom had no problem in participating in the war and making jokes about burning Ba Sing Se to the ground. Zuko was under scrutiny and aggression from Ozai. Ozai was Zuko’s ‘handler’, his ‘groomer’. He groomed Zuko into a certain type of submissive and obedient behavior. Zuko was not allowed to show any type of emotion otherwise he would suffer severe repercussions. Ozai and Azula taunted Zuko for having a sense of compassion and with how he was ostracized in a war loving family, he began to believe his behavior and way of thinking was unusual. It was like Azula said to Mai, “Your mother had certain expectations of you and when you strayed from them you were shot down.” In Zuko’s case, the expectations he strayed from resulted in severe punishment. Ozai was willing to permanently disfigure and traumatize Zuko when he was a thirteen year old boy. It’s not unusual to think that his punishments towards Zuko would sometimes very likely be physical and many people even write alternate universes of the Avatar series where Ozai was even more abusive than he already was. He was a manipulative man who brainwashed his daughter into being his perfect, obedient little slave and manipulated his son into questioning his own sense of reality. He would tell him that Azula was born lucky and he was lucky to be born, cementing Azula’s view of herself of receiving everything she wanted and turning her personality toxic while he made Zuko feel inferior and faulty. If there was something wrong with him, his father would tell him and he needed to fix it. But he never could. He strayed towards his mother, who like Iroh, abandoned Azula because of Ozai’s manipulation and did nothing to help her like they ‘helped’ Zuko.

When Zuko was thirteen he wanted to ‘prove’ himself to his father by attending one of his war meetings. Zuko very likely only wished to do what his father wanted because by then, Iroh had abandoned him when he left after the Siege of Ba Sing Se, his mother disappeared and his grandfather and cousin were both dead. The only ones he had left of his family were his father and sister who both abused him and he only wished for their approval and their affection. Humans need mutual affection. Children who do not receive affection from their parents, tend to not take that type of neglect well. Because people need affection to properly function. Our parents love us from when we are young and that emotional connection is something very important to every human being’s mental state. However, Zuko’s only source of affection, his mother, was taken away from him. Azula herself, had no source of affection. Not from her mother, who thought she was demented from her father’s brainwashing, nor from her brother who feared her, nor from her father who used her as a tool. Returning to the day of the Agni Kai, Zuko wished to be of use to his father, he craved his affection because that is what the abuser does. They make you believe they are the only ones who can validate you and if you do not abide by their rules or follow their orders then you mean nothing. Zuko for the most part from what I could see in the flashback, held his promise and did not speak. But when he refused to back down when his people were in danger, Ozai was not pleased. This is because he is an abuser. He is Zuko’s ‘handler’ and when someone who is abusing another person witnesses this type of behavior, they have a feeling of loss of control. They desire control, they crave it, over the abusee especially. So when Zuko showed empathy towards the Fire Nation citizens and did not do as Ozai wished, he decided to ‘rectify’ that. In the most BRUTAL way possible. An Agni Kai. A public spectacle where he would establish dominance over his son, over his pawn and he would make a show of it. He would show everyone that HE was the one in control and NO ONE could defy him. When Zuko refused to fight Ozai, because of his love for his father, Ozai only saw that as a weakness. Ozai is a psychotic man. The fact that he did not have any problem in burning his son so cruelly shows that he does not have any sense of morals. Going back to Zuko, a thirteen year old child at the time, he had just been punished for disobedience, for straying from his father’s expectations, in the worst way possible.

Zuko did what many people would say is the right thing to do. He tried to defend his people from a cruel man intent on sending them to their deaths. But in doing so, he had defied his father and was punished for it. He was punished....for trying to HELP people. His life was essentially DESTROYED and he was thrown out of his home...for trying to help people. For showing empathy towards others. He was punished in the worst way possible for defying his father. His entire perception of right and wrong was thrown out of balance. He was taught that the war was right and that the Fire Lord, his father, was all knowing. And his mother tried to teach him kindness and her lessons of kindness got him punished. The amount of physical and mental damage he had sustained from such a punishment would in some cases be irreversible. Iroh was right there with Zuko and he did nothing. I CAN understand why he did not step in during the Agni Kai. He had been gone from the Fire Nation, his brother had taken the throne and he could have very well himself been punished severely for intervening. However, why did he allow Zuko to continue to believe he was the one at fault? Everyone of us has seen Zhao, has seen the way he treated Zuko during his banishment. Zuko very likely spent those entire two years before Aang’s arrival, being subjected to that type of behavior from everyone around him. All of them blamed him, all of them very likely said that he’d deserved what had happened to him. No one was on his side. He ended up turning aggressive and cruel towards others, because that was the way his father behaved and it was his empathy towards others that got him punished in the first place. He said in The Storm ‘the safety of the crew doesn’t matter’, just like the general that called the 41st division ‘fresh meat’. It was easier for Zuko to lash out at others and be aggressive than to let them see his vulnerabilities and hurt him for them again. It was the same with Song and her mother. Ozai tried to force him to be cruel, he tried to groom him the same way he did Azula. They dehumanized the other Nations and Zuko behaved the exact same way he was expected to. ‘Their compassion would cost them’. It was exactly the way his father wanted him to be. It was what Iroh did not wish for him, and yet despite claiming he thought of Zuko as a son, he did not in any way try to convince Zuko to give up his quest during the two years he had been searching for something that at the time was believed did not exist. The only instance we were shown of Iroh saying anything against his search, and even that is a stretch, was in the Western Air Temple episode where Zuko has a flashback of Iroh telling him that ‘destiny was a funny thing’ when Zuko said it was his destiny to capture the Avatar. Iroh had time to run the White Lotus, an antiwar organization for two YEARS maybe even longer and he did not think of taking two MINUTES to talk to Zuko, to ease him into realizing the wrongs of the war. Okay, yes he could have passed it off as character growth. But how do you expect a person, surrounded by people telling him he was at fault, he had no choice, either obey or never come back, to realize something like that? How do you expect an abuse victim to accept help all by themselves when their abuser forces them to depend on them? Did Iroh take him to some Earth Kingdom villages to see that they aren’t the vicious savages the Fire Nation portrays them to be? Did he take Zuko to the Southern Water Tribe to see the damage done to them at the hands of his own country? No. Instead he acted like an oblivious old man who had no interest other than Pai Sho and speaking proverbs that Zuko could not hope to understand.

Two years Zuko spent looking and looking and he turned desperate to the point that he was willing to do anything to go home. And then The Avatar finally returned. And then the people that Zuko was raised to perceive as brutal savages continued to stand in his way. And did Iroh intervene? No. He still did nothing. He allowed Zuko to continue his pursuit and turn into the worst possible version of himself. People say that Zuko should own up to the consequences of his actions. And he should. But would he have done those actions had Iroh stopped him earlier? Would he have done any of the things he did when the only remaining adult figure in his life had told him otherwise? Would he have listened to Iroh? The answer is yes. He was willing to do what Ozai had expected of him so why would he not listen to Iroh with time and patience instead of waiting till the last possible moment to do so? Children don’t automatically know right from wrong from the moment of their birth. They are taught by their parents, by the adults in their lives and Zuko had Ozai as his parental influence. And Iroh knew that. He knew the type of man his brother was and he did not try to overwrite his brother’s abuse to help his nephew until Zuko was already on the path of no return. When they became refugees Iroh still did nothing until they got to Ba Sing Se and until Zuko, again in an act of desperation, tried to capture Appa. That was when he FINALLY decided to step in. Three years since Zuko’s banishment, sixteen years of his father’s influence and abuse and he decides the very moment his nephew is close to the brink of insanity is the perfect opportunity to DESTROY his entire world view. He had worked day in and day out for two years before Aang appeared, only for his uncle, someone he TRUSTED, to tell him it was all for NOTHING. Two years of TORTURING himself. A year of fighting against his Nation’s enemies and SUDDENLY he’s being told it was all for nothing. When Iroh and Zuko reunited, Iroh told him he found his way again ‘on his own’ like how Zuko told Ozai he had to learn everything ‘on his own’. And they were both right. Zuko had no one to help him. He had to suffer through so much on his own, without anyone’s help and they’re SURPRISED he acted the way he did. When everything came to ahead in Ba Sing Se with Katara, people thought ‘Oh Zuko has changed he’s going to help Katara.’ And when he did not they HATED him for it. 

The reason for this is because Katara was the ‘good guy’ and Zuko was the ‘bad guy’. Black and white. Katara and Zuko shared a moment of understanding from both losing their mothers and Katara offered to heal his scar and he chose to side with Azula and both Katara and the viewers saw this as a betrayal on Zuko’s part. This assumption however is completely unjustified and unfounded. Everyone sees Zuko and the Fire Nation as the bad guys. The villains of the story. But Katara and the Water Tribes and Earth Kingdom were the bad guys in the Fire Nation’s eyes. Katara was the ‘savage’ standing in the way of Zuko going home. The Avatar was his home’s greatest ENEMY and THREAT. Had the situation been reversed and Katara had to choose between Zuko and the Water Tribe and her brother and father, people would have supported her choice because they were the good guys. Zuko’s people were the bad guys so it had to be the wrong decision and a betrayal to Katara and Iroh. But Zuko was an unstable, traumatized child who did not wish to believe his people were bad, who did not want to fight his home after he spent so long trying to capture Aang, his home’s greatest THREAT and ENEMY. Katara hated Zuko because he represented everything that the Fire Nation did to her family. And Zuko hated her because she was the ‘savage’ keeping him from his one way home. To Zuko, Katara was the bad guy. And looking back at their moment of sympathy where Katara said he betrayed her trust I can only ask one thing....how could Zuko have known that Katara wasn’t trying to trick him? Now, the viewers would automatically respond ‘Katara’s not like that! She wouldn’t do that!’ but the fact is, we the viewers KNOW Katara. We know she’s not that type of person because we got to know her through out the series. Zuko does NOT know her. To Zuko, she’s just another faceless enemy out to KILL his father. He chose Azula’s side because he could not accept what Iroh was saying to him because why hadn’t Iroh said so sooner? He did not want to join Aang’s side cause this was the AVATAR. The one out to KILL his FATHER and take down his HOME. When Zuko returned, he was conflicted about what he had done because he had begun to see how wrong his father and sister’s behavior and The Fire Nation’s war truly was. And Iroh cemented that further by proclaiming Zuko’s struggle was because of Roku and Sozin’s conflict when that was clearly not the case. Zuko was groomed and brainwashed by the Fire Nation propaganda like every other citizen but he was not dispelled from that belief by anyone. No one tried to make him question that belief. Iroh did not try to ‘help Zuko’ until the very last moment in Ba Sing Se. People believe Zuko betrayed Iroh because that’s how it’s supposed to be when Zuko was the ‘bad guy’ and Iroh was the ‘caring’ Uncle and ‘voice of reason’. And yet he did not think to ‘reason’ with Zuko before this entire mess even started. He did not in any way try to disrupt Zuko’s view of the other Nations or his father. In my opinion, IROH was the one who betrayed ZUKO. Iroh KNEW the entire time that what Zuko was doing was wrong. Zuko was a child who was not allowed to think for himself and Iroh KNEW Zuko was brainwashed by the exact same propaganda he himself had believed before he lost his son. If Iroh, who had believed in the Fire Nation for so many years, was unable to realize the wrongs of the war until his ADULTHOOD when he lost his son, how in the world did he expect a 13 year old child to do so? And Zuko became even more unstable and then he chose the Fire Nation.

When he realized it was wrong and went to join team Avatar, they were reasonably mistrusting.

Zuko’s redemption arc from a simple perspective, from team Avatar’s perspective was very well done. Team Avatar did not know what Zuko had been through. To them he was just another Fire Nation monster who had hurt them. To the audience, he was just another Fire Nation monster who had hurt the good guys. No one would think that deep into a fictional character’s perspective or psychological and mental state. No one would think past the ‘good guy’ and the ‘bad guy’. But one thing I cannot justify is Katara’s accusation of betrayal towards Zuko. As we have mentioned, Zuko and Katara were enemies who had a mutual hatred towards each other before his ‘redemption’. They had one single moment of shared empathy and understanding and that is NOT the basis for earned trust. What would Katara have done had she been in Zuko’s shoes? Fighting her enemies, fighting people she sees as nothing more than monsters and she has to choose between her long time enemy and her sibling and her home and her family. If she was in that position, she would choose Sokka and Hakoda and Aang and the Water Tribe over Zuko in a heartbeat because those are her FAMILY members and her FRIENDS and people would justify her because she’s the ‘good guy’. The hero. But Zuko is the villain so his actions automatically AREN’T justifiable. I understand Katara’s mistrust towards Zuko because of their history and because again, she doesn’t know anything about him or what he went through. But she cannot expect him to just automatically leave behind everything he’s ever known and ever believed in because of one single moment of understanding. Zuko should have done everything he could to make it up to the group because he owed it to them and they again, did not know any of his reasons for hunting them. But Zuko does not deserve to be labeled simply as ‘a bad guy turned good’ when he was NEVER a bad guy to begin with. When he was never even mentally stable enough to make that type of decision for himself. In today’s day and age Zuko and Azula would have BOTH ended up in a mental institution. And after all of the things he went through, Zuko was the one who ended up going back to Iroh and apologizing when Iroh was the one who abandoned him and then Zuko at 16 years old ended up as the leader of a nearly fallen apart country. He had to suffer through insomnia, assassination attempts and mental instability and abandonment. Iroh left to Ba Sing Se and only made two appearances in a total of SIX comic books after the end of the War and one of those was entirely brief. So while Iroh gets to enjoy the rest of his life selling tea, Zuko has to suffer the consequences for what his family did. He was also abandoned by Mai which brings me to another point.

Zuko’s toxic relationships.

Some people say they dislike Mai because she is emotionally abusive towards Zuko. It never occurred to me before but looking at it now, I have to say that I agree. In the comics after book 2 had ended it was shown that Azula used Mai’s childhood crush on Zuko to manipulate him into going back to the Fire Nation with her. And Mai.....I don’t even know how to get started on the entire mess that is their relationship. Mai is a person who does not like emotion. She doesn’t like to express herself and immediately shuts down anything even close to emotion. The same applies to Zuko. Zuko is a very emotionally unstable and insecure person. And instead of reassuring and calming him, Mai immediately cuts him off whenever he loses a handle of his emotions and just flat out ends their relationship on the spot. She gives Zuko no explanation, just gets angry at him and then all of a sudden when Zuko can’t take anymore and explodes she suddenly says she cares about him. Their relationship is toxic. Mai demeans his problems and things that trouble him. Quote “I just asked if you were cold, I didn’t ask for your whole life story.” when Zuko was nervous about going back home. She demeans his guilt towards Iroh and tries to make him feel better by ordering servants around. And then in the Boiling Rock episode she attacks him for his letter which is reasonable on her part, but there is the problem that despite being Zuko’s girlfriend, up until that point she was Azula’s subordinate first and foremost and she could have tried to let Azula know. Still was a shitty way of ending their relationship, I’m not gonna act like it wasn’t but I still wanted to put that perspective out there just for thought. Not to mention how she ended things in the comic books. The trust issue I understand. But I don’t understand how ONE single mistake would lead to her just immediately ending things instead of at least TRYING to work it out. She could have listened to him and seen why he was so upset and scared of messing up that he went to Ozai of all people for help. She did not stick by him when he needed her and that was what forever ruined their relationship for me. 

In simple terms, Zuko was a bad guy who became a good guy and redeemed himself.

In psychological terms, Zuko was an abuse victim who was brainwashed since his childhood, blamed for it and made into a scapegoat while his sister ended up in a mental institution because of her father’s influence and because the same people who ‘helped’ Zuko didn’t think she deserved it too.

So from what I’ve seen while rewatching the series....

Zuko never needed redeeming. Zuko needed help.

And he didn’t get it. 

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Taxes are for the little people

If you wanna do crimes, make them incredibly complicated and technical. Like the hustlers that came into the bookstore I worked at and spun these long-ass stories about why they needed money for a Greyhound ticket home.

Those guys shoulda studied the private equity sector.

Private equity's playbook is to borrow giant sums by putting up other peoples' companies as collateral (yes, really). Then they use that money to buy the company they mortgaged, and pay themselves a huge dividend.

Then they sell off the company's assets and pay themselves even more money. That leaves the company in a state of precarity - assets they once owned, like their buildings, they now rent. If the rent goes up, they have to find the money to cover it.

All of this forms a pretense for mass layoffs, defaulting on pension obligations, lowering product quality, stiffing suppliers and borrowing more money. If the company doesn't go bust, the PE looters can flip it to *another* PE company, that does it again.

Whenever you see something really terrible happening to a business that once offered useful products and services and paid decent wages, it's a safe bet that PE is behind it. Toys R Us, Sears, your local hospital - and that memestock favorite, AMC.

https://pluralistic.net/2020/04/12/mammon-worshippers/#silver-lake-partners

Private equity goons make their money in two ways: the first is by pocketing 20% of  these special dividends and other extractive policies that hollow out business.

This is money at PE managers get paid for spending their investors' money. It's a wage, in other words.

But thanks to the "carried interest" loophole (a hangover from 16th-century sea captains that has nothing to do with "interest" on loans), they get to treat these wages as "capital gains" and pay far less tax on them.

The fact that we give preferential tax treatment to capital gains (money derived from gambling), while taxing wages (money derived from doing useful work) at higher rates really tells you everything you need to know about our economic priorities.

https://pluralistic.net/2021/04/29/writers-must-be-paid/#carried-interest

The carried interest loophole lets PE crooks treat their salaries as capital gains, are taxed at a much lower rate than the wages of the workers whose lives they're destroying.

On top of the 20% profit-share that PE bosses get every year, they also pocket a 2% "management fee" for all the "value" they add to the companies they've taken over.

This is *definitely* a wage. The 20% profit-share at least has an element of risk, but that 2% is guaranteed.

But PE bosses have spent more than a decade booking that 2% wage as a capital gain, using a tax-fraud tactic called "fee waivers." The details of how a fee waiver don't matter because it's all bullshit, like the tale of the needful Greyhound ticket.

All that matters is that a legal fiction allows people earning *eight- or nine-figure salaries* to treat *all* of those wages as capital gains and pay lower rates of tax on them than the janitors who clean their toilets or the workers whose jobs they will annihilate.

Now, the IRS knows all about this. Whistleblowers came forward in 2011 to warn them about it. The Treasury even struck a committee to come up with new rules to fix it.

But Obama failed to make those rules stick, and then Trump put a former tax-cheat enabler in charge of redrafting them. The cheater-friendly rules became law on Jan 5, and handed PE bosses hundreds of millions in savings every year.

https://www.nytimes.com/2021/06/12/business/private-equity-taxes.html

The New York Times report on "fee waivers" goes through the rulemaking history, the technical details of the scam, and the gutting of the IRS, which can no longer afford to audit rich people and now makes its quotas by preferentially auditing low earners who can't afford lawyers.

But former securities lawyer Jerri-Lynn Scofield's breakdown of the Times piece on Naked Capitalism really connects the dots:

https://www.nakedcapitalism.com/2021/06/private-inequity-nyt-examines-how-the-private-equity-industry-avoids-taxes.html

As Scofield and Yves Smith point out, if Biden wanted to do one thing for tax justice, he could abolish preferential treatment for capital gains. If we want a society of makers and doers instead of owners and gamblers, we shouldn't penalize wages and reward rents.

There's an especial urgency to this right now. As the PE bosses themselves admit, they went on a buying spree during the pandemic (they call it "saving American businesses"). Larger and larger swathes of the productive economy are going into the PE meat-grinder.

Worse still, the PE industry has revived its most destructive tactic, the "club deal," whereby PE firms collaborate to take out whole economic sectors in one go:

https://pluralistic.net/2021/05/14/billionaire-class-solidarity/#club-deals

We're at an historic crossroads for tax justice. On the one hand, you have the blockbuster Propublica report on leaked IRS files that revealed that the net tax rate paid by America's billionaires is close to zero.

https://pluralistic.net/2021/06/08/leona-helmsley-was-a-pioneer/#eat-the-rich

This has left the Bootlicker-Industrial Complex in the bizarre position of arguing that anyone who suggests someone who amasses billions of dollars should pay more than $0 in tax is a radical socialist (so far, the go-to tactic is to make performative noises about privacy).

At the same time, the G7 has agreed to an historical tax deal that will see businesses taxed at least 15% on the revenue they make in each country, irrespective of the accounting fictions they use to claim that the profits are being earned in the middle of the Irish Sea.

That deal is historical, but the fact that it's being hailed as curbing corporate power reveals just how distorted our discourse about corporate taxes has become.

As Thomas Piketty writes, self-employed people pay 20-50% tax in countries that will tax the world's wealthiest companies a mere 15%: "For SMEs as well as for the working and middle classes, it is impossible to create a subsidiary to relocate its profits to a tax haven."

Piketty, like Gabriel Zucman, says that EU nations should charge multinationals a minimum of 25%, and like Zucman, he reminds us that the G7 deal does nothing to help the poorest countries in the Global South.

https://www.lemonde.fr/blog/piketty/2021/06/15/the-g7-legalizes-the-right-to-defraud/

These countries and the EU have something in common: they aren't "monetarily sovereign" (that is, they don't issue their own currencies *and* borrow in the currencies they issue).

Sovereign currency issuers (US, UK, Japan, Canada, Australia, etc) don't need to tax in order to pay for programs - first they spend new money into the economy and then they tax it back out again.

https://pluralistic.net/2020/06/10/compton-cowboys/#the-deficit-myth

These countries can run out of stuff to buy in their currency, but they can't run out of the currency itself. Monetarily sovereign countries don't tax to fund their operations.

Rather, they tax to fight inflation (if you spend money into the economy every year but don't take some of it out again through taxation, more and more money will chase the same goods and services and prices will go up).

And just as importantly, monetary sovereigns tax to reduce the spending power - and hence the political power - of the wealthy. The fact that PE bosses had billions of tax-free dollars at their disposal let them spend millions to distort tax policy to legalize fee waivers.

Taxing the money - and hence the power - of wage earners at higher rates than gamblers creates politics that value gambling above work, because gamblers get to spend the winnings they retain on political influence, including campaigns to rig the casino in their favor.

This discredits the whole system, shatters social cohesion and makes it hard to even imagine that we can build a better world - or avert the climate-wracked dystopia on the horizon.

But for Eurozone countries (whose monetary supply is controlled by technocrats at the ECB) and countries of the Global South (whom the IMF has forced into massive debts owed in US dollars, which they can only get by selling their national products), tax is even more urgent.

The US could fund its infrastructure needs just by creating money at the central bank.

EU and post-colonial lands can only fund programs with taxes, so for them, billionaires don't just distort their priorities and corrupt their system - they also starve their societies.

But that doesn't mean that monetary sovereigns can tolerate billionaires and their policy distortions. The UK is monetarily sovereign, in the G7, and its finance minister is briefing to have the City of London's banks exempted from the new tax deal.

https://www.bloomberg.com/news/articles/2021-06-08/u-k-pushes-for-city-of-london-exemption-from-global-tax-deal

Now, the City of London is one of the world's great financial crime-scenes, and its banks are responsible for an appreciable portion of the planet-destabilizing frauds of the past 100 years.

During the Great Financial Crisis AIG used its London subsidiary to commit crimes its US branch couldn't get away with. The City of London was the epicenter of the LIBOR fraud, the Greensill collapse - it's the Zelig of finance crime, the heart of every fraud.

UK Chancellor Rishi Sunak claims banks are already paying high global tax and can't afford to be part of the G7 tax deal. If that was true, it wouldn't change the fact that these banks are too big to jail and anything that shrinks them is a net benefit.

But it's not true.

As the tax justice campaigner  Richard Murphy points out, the risk to banks like Barclays adds up to 0.8% of global turnover: "The big deal is that the 15% global minimum tax rate is much too low. Suinak has yet again spectacularly missed the point."

https://www.taxresearch.org.uk/Blog/2021/06/09/how-big-is-the-tax-hit-on-banks-from-the-g7-tax-deal-that-sunak-fears-really-going-to-be/

Image: Joshua Doubek (modified) https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:IRS_Sign.JPG

CC BY-SA: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en

[couslie]

Alistair is not a ‘himbo’: discussion of the continuous mischaracterization of Alistair with disregard to his trauma.

Throughout the fandom, Alistair is seen as a ‘cheese-loving himbo,’ and his personality is narrowed down to these two factors. People often see him as stupid, to put it simply, and others see him as ‘annoying’ and ‘whiny’. However, Alistair is quite possibly one of the most in-depth and fleshed out character that BioWare has developed. He is not actually stupid, and he should not be labeled as ‘whiny’ or ‘annoying’ either. Under the cut is an in-depth perspective of Alistair, his trauma, and his personality. 

Disclaimer: this is not going to be a ‘callout’ post to the fandom in any way. It is simply a character analysis on Alistair and his coping mechanisms for his trauma and how it is often misperceived. Warning for length.

Firstly, what is a ‘himbo?’

A ‘himbo’ is described as “an attractive but stupid young man,” most commonly used in reference to Alistair in the Dragon Age fandom. While the jokes are funny, sometimes it is taken a little too far. I have seen many people truly believe that Alistair is dumb and incompetent, and honestly, at first I also believed so. Throughout Dragon Age Origins, numerous characters comment on Alistair’s intellect including himself. This is often misinterpreted that Alistair is indeed unintelligent since he says so himself, right? Not quite.

Trauma:

Anyone who has played Dragon Age Origins knows that Alistair is the secret bastard son of King Maric to a ‘serving-girl in Redcliffe’. Instead of being raised by King Maric, Alistair was hidden away with his half-brother’s uncle, Arl Eamon, in Redcliffe. Eventually, rumors floated around that Alistair was Arl Eamon’s son, a rumor that Arl Eamon’s wife believed. Consequently, Alistair was sent to a Chantry monastery to begin training as a Templar around the age of ten; ten years later being ‘saved’ by Warden Commander Duncan and conscripted into the Grey Wardens. This is the biggest subplot in DAO, and other than the Blight looming over Fereldan/Thedas, is a main point in DAO’s storyline. 

This alone sounds absolutely awful for a child to have to go through. But it gets much, much worse for Alistair. Traveling though Fereldan with Alistair and talking with him gets him to open up a little about what his childhood was like. Most of it is shrouded in humor; however, he lets some truth shine through.

From this we can confer that Alistair did not have an ideal childhood living with the Arl in Redcliffe. Especially since when the Arl would visit Denerim, Alistair would sleep with the hounds. Not only is it hinted that Alistair suffered child neglect, it is also hinted that he may have suffered verbal abuse. As Arl Eamon was one of the only people to know that Alistair was Maric’s bastard, the verbal abuse and belittlement most likely came from him. 

 Throughout Alistair’s life he felt uncared for, and was so ignored and neglected as a child that even grown up he feels invisible and unheard. 

So uncared for, that even the simple act of giving him a gift he acts as if he never had anyone ever give him anything (which is possible except for maybe a few times). 

Or, even just remembering that he mentioned something.

Or, even a simple compliment makes him feel unworthy.

No one would listen to him or what he wanted, and that is another main sub plot of DAO. Going to visit Goldanna, the player can choose whether or not to harden Alistair and basically tell him, “People only look out for themselves. It’s time you did, too.”

Alistair felt he was unloved, unwanted, and a general burden to his family (and especially felt this way after meeting Goldanna). The only person he felt may have loved him was his mother who he believed to be a serving-girl; a main reason he holds on to his mother’s amulet. She represents the only person in his life, up until Duncan, who he thought would have loved and be proud of him. 

Coping Mechanisms:

Now that Alistair’s trauma is laid-out, we can move on to how he copes with said trauma. Alistair uses humor as a defense mechanism to cope with his childhood traumas, and it is very common, especially self-deprecating and dark humor. According to G. Swaminath, “Freud postulated that humor [sic] works by means of two principal mechanisms, ‘condensation’ and ‘displacement’. Condensation entails an economy in thought and expression and conserves psychic energy, and displacement transfers this psychic energy arising from conflict or incongruity to a humorous anecdote, which brings relief. Freud believed that cultivating a sense of humor [sic] could help lift repressions (i.e. unconscious conflictual material) but could also be harmful, particularly in certain forms of sarcasm and irony, directed at the self.”

(source)

Most, if not all of Alistair’s humor, is directed at himself in a very self-deprecating manner. Whether to make the player feel better, to make himself seem unimportant, or because his self-esteem is truly that low.

For Alistair, appearing as an idiot was the easiest way to be under the radar. He never wanted to be King. He didn’t want people to treat him differently, either, for knowing that King Maric was his father. The best way to seem insignificant was to belittle himself and appear that he was an ‘idiotic nobody’.

On top of all this, the player can even callout Alistair for using humor as a defense mechanism and deflecting questions that he doesn’t really want to answer.

It’s not that Alistair is truly unintelligent or ‘whiny/annoying,’ he is using humor to cope and defend in the best way he knows how.

So, is Alistair actually intelligent?

Firstly, intelligence is hard to measure. One person’s definition of intelligence could vary wildly from another person’s. There’s also the perspective that intelligence can be categorized. For example, a person may be book-smart but not street-smart and vice-versa. Who is to say, however, that both are not equally as intelligent, but just in different categories? There is no basis for ‘intelligence.’ Everyone can be intelligent in their own way, and for Alistair, he is intelligent on history (specifically chantry), battle tactics, and knowing deception/people’s motives. 

(Alistair not being told what the dark ritual is for)

As @mahariel-theirin​ said: “Right from the start you can just tell Alistair is smart, and not just because of his wit. When the Warden asks him about the origin of darkspawn he says, “You want the Chantry version, or the truth?” When asked about the fight with the mage, he calls out the revered mother’s power play by using him as a messenger. Look at that insight. That awareness. And that’s just from the first 5 minutes of meeting him.”

End Notes:

Take out of this what you will. But Alistair is more of a ‘hunk’ than a ‘himbo,’ and shouldn’t be discredited. He was abused and neglected his whole life. I personally believe Alistair should be given more credit than he has been receiving, and BioWare for creating a character that is so in-depth and fleshed out they have deceived people in believing that Alistair is truly dumb. Which, ironically, is what Alistair wanted in-game. I am not in any way saying to quit joking about Alistair being a ‘himbo’ either! A lot of the jokes are quite funny. This was purely made out of the informational interest of some people not quite understanding Alistair’s character and truly believing he might be one of the most stupid people in Thedas (and potentially misunderstanding his humor/defense/coping mechanism as stupidity). If anything, Alistair is ‘himbo-passing’ at best.

Also, with special thanks to @planesofduality for their Dragon Age Compendium. It was tremendously useful, and I thank you for all the time and devotion you put in to it to make it possible. Many thanks! Also thanks to @sundogsandrainbows, @not-plaidweave​, and @irhinoceri​ for discussing this with me and encouraging me to make this meta.

[flamingcraniumb]

I've been writing like a maniac and I hope I can get the support of my friends. I know I've spoke out about the grooming I endured as a teenager and other atrocities. I sat down the other night, spent 2 days and a night writing out the entire story. Let me tell you something, write out your pain and hurt because young you didn't have the entire story. I was being emotionally abused by my "friends" in school, who caused the entire school to ostracize me. I realize these conversations are uncomfortable but if we're not talking about it then it's still happening. I was a traumatized kid by the time I arrived at my hs which made me more susceptible to the abuse. Let's protect our future kids from this. I wrote in the format of a letter to Melodee, since she insists on gaslighting me:

Melodee,

I know this is so very long! I just don't want to leave anything out. I'd hate for you to get your hopes up about having a chance at "destroying" me by using the decisions I made when I was a kid against me. All the while I was in a tornado of people, all throwing weapons at me. I mean its "cute" when bullies think the same empty, basic tactics they used on you the first time they tried to destroy your life might work again but you've used the, "my friend catfished me" out of context twice now. It's reassuring to see you both still lack the abilities to dangerously create false stories. I almost laughed at how you're trying to present this image of yourselves as people who are caring, kind, thoughtful!

So I'm just genuinely curious if you can come up with anything else that doesn't sound like another one of your cliche, predictable deflections SO yawn. Now that I've once again claimed the same mistake you keep trying to use against me in an attempt to excuse your terrible behavior. A single mistake you used to cover up the countless bullying and betrayal you forced me to endure. What desperate attempt will you use to discredit my voice? I don't think I have anything else you can use. I guess you'll have to learn how to be more creative or maybe you can find one of my other traumatic experiences to use to discredit me again. I'm fully aware I won't recieve any honesty. My healing isn't reliant on your ability to be honest about the cruel acts you carry out.

Why do you think I'm here Melodee? Putting myself back in a stressful situation with shitty people like you, who will hurt anyone just to cover their tracks, especially when I never want to talk to any of you ever again. Its my responsibility to protect/warn others. So if the pain you caused me can account for anything, than I hope it can bring awareness to emotional abuse in teenagers and how dangerous ostracizing can be. Its also my right to finally reclaim my voice after you guys tried to take it from me, it just took me awhile to build my confidence back up after all that.

So why would I step out of my comfort zone to dredge up the past? Its like that quote you posted, about how you could forgive someone for mistakes they'd made in the past if you knew they were doing the work to fix themselves? Well you can't fix people who won't admit they have a problem. So no, I don't forgive you for all the ridiculous shit you've put me through or your recent pathetic attempt to continue victim shaming me. The fact that you've not only contributed to the major problem of why victims don't come out about abuse, but many other incidents where you've willing suppressed women just for the approval of the toxic male. You've even gotten children involved in your drama. You're an enemy of us women and children, especially us abused.

I don't forgive Nayt, he's incapable of taking an honest look at himself, which I'd be terrified of myself too. Or maybe he's just not strong enough to do the work because it would take an extremely strong man to admit his faults and repair them. Instead he hides behind counter cultural movements, always shifting between personas. I'm goth, I'm a redneck, now I'm a hippy. When really hes just an an abuser who will use anything to justify why he put his hands on me.

I don't forgive Kaelia. She presents herself as someone who doesn't let anyone push them around. Well, I don't know who would be able to push her around when shes already the one doing all the pushing. I don't have faith any of you have any humanity left or if you even ever had any.

I dont need "friends" who will sit in the next room while someone is being hurt or potentially killed. I dont need "friends" who cause me to feel like I have to remember every word I've ever said, so its not manipulated to be used against me. Thanks to you guys, I'm actually able to recognize a lot of red flags sooner. Knowledge from abuse comes at a very high price.

Thankful I didn't supress myself enough for you to control me. You call me weak yet you could never endure the life I've lived and still stay honest. You couldn't even survive your own trauma enough to avoid becoming hateful bullies. Instead you chose to be weak and petty, using the same mistakes I made when you and Kaelia were bullying me. While I was still trying to recover from my traumatic childhood.

So here we go! I've taken your gags out of my mouth to finally tell everyone the true story of how two girls, who were supposed to be my friends, tormented me through high school, decided to smear my name, risked my life, allowed a pedophile to get away and ostracized me from my peers all for the amusement of petty drama.

I just starting writing out everything from the moment you and Kaelia darkened my door, to the moment when I was finally rid of you. I realised I'd never wrote out everything you guys put me through. Then I saw the timeline coming together, the pieces connected and I have to say I was shocked! It seemed so obvious, how hadnt I seen it before?! Coming out about Gunny and Nayt were completely linked. I could finally see the severity of what all of you did to me.

So I'm sure everyone would love to know the extremely evil and sinister act I committed that led you ladies to go to such extremes as, riling up our entire school to assault me after you convinced them to disregard when I was groomed by a teacher, sit in the next room while knowingly risking my life, romantically pursue the dv guy who just tried to kill your friend, marry the dv guy! Ok drum roll: so apparently when you're a stupid kid and do stupid kid things like create stupid bfs for your friends who are lonely, you could accidentally create these really thoughtful boys who write them poetry and remember all their favorite interests. You realize you've majorly messed up and that you didn't think this all the way through. You come forward on your own with guilt to admit what you've done. Never belittling their hurt and taking responsibility, even when you knew how hypocritical it is they're holding this over your head despite the excessive amount of toxic incidents they put you through. Some of which were: Kaelia starts dating a guy I had just asked out and was still hurt over him saying no. When you try to tell her this is hurtful to you, she assures you she isnt actually interested in him! She's merely just using him in hopes to get closer to his brother, who she finds more aesthically pleasing. So she drags you to sit with them at lunch, glaring at you if you look too miserable about how poorly you're being treated. I mean I could keep listing stories but its the same theme of me being too broken from my past toxic relationships that I couldn't see this was emotional abuse. I couldn't see that when she would start fights with me over my wanting to occasionally have lunch with other friends, that it was controlling, not loving.

So after admitting my guilt, you actually "accepted" my apology and it didn't take very long for you to be chummy towards me again. Which of course, I know abusers don't actually understand how the concept of apologies and forgiveness work because that part of their brain is already filled up with gaslighting and deflection tactics. It just reminds me how you guys would store every tiny mistake up to be used against me, whenever it was convenient for you to get away with how terrible you were treating me. Which I guess that's still a thing you do.. We even agreed on taking it slow LOL cause this was still in the days you wanted me to believe your nice guy act. Kaelia on the other hand wants and even demands you know you have upset her, this could go on for very long periods of time, over any little thing she chose to be upset about. So she would still hang with the group, dramatically she'd whisper into one of our friends ear that she might be close to forgiving me soon but I knew she just wanted to keep me hanging on for her. It really didn't bother me anymore because I felt I had been as honest as I could be with my mistake and I would constantly try to go out of my way to show I cared for her. I now realize it wasn't a test of whether I really cared for her. She just wanted me to suffer and it didn't really matter what I'd done. Now that I'm older and writing this all out, I see Kaelia was just another narcissist and you her flying monkey, until you decided to pick her brother as your new owner.

So Im stressed about my family falling apart and Kaelias bullying, so finally I said fuck it! I attempted to move on with my Life. I actually started developing friendships with others BUT youre not allowed to leave the narc. Kaelia is now a stalker, she seems to be going out of her way to just stand around hallways and glare at me. Literally following me around everywhere and being passive aggressive. I still hadn't healed from a lot of what I'd been through in foster care and didn't realize the severity of what you two were putting me through.

Wont you ever find peace away from these messed up individuals? Well the bullying and stress from home didn't let up, I attempted to take my Life. So as you know and I guess many others who I don't know but seem to know about my personal business that I went to an Institution. I knew I wasn't perfect and I made mistakes but I also knew in my heart that I would figure out how to navigate this Life. I just kept thinking, am I working against the Universe to keep attracting these abusive people? So when I got out, I really tried to piece my Life back together. I really focused on my grades, I didn't act like a class clown and my Mom enrolled me in ROTC. Hoping it would teach me skills that might help living with my adhd easier. NOT because I was some bad kid who was constantly acting out.

So many narratives people made up and ran with. I've never been good at or enjoyed keeping up with gossip but I could hear people say we went all the way to court where Gunny lost his job. I guess that narrative sounds a lot better than the truth, that my entire school chose an adults safety over a child's. Even though, just a little over in West Plains they couldn't believe how disgustingly the school was behaving. Funny noone ever asked me details about anything OH YEAH its kind of hard to have a voice when two bullies are going around telling everyone you're liar and who knows what else. I do one stupid thing that any kid could have done and they felt the need to discredit my entire reputation. I realize now I should have listened to my Mom when she told me you guys would hurt me. "Right as always Mom." I hate that you were also able to drag her into your sick games.

When I was at that age, I had no idea how to handle all the stress that was coming at me. Gunny like many other groomers saw his opportunity and took it. Same with abusers like you and Kaelia. You all kicked me while I was down. You and Kaelia had already been kicking me for awhile but this time you decided you really wanted to ruin my life. And you did, for awhile. I sometimes wonder if I would have really stood a chance too, because there was so much evidence against Gunny but noone could see past your lies. I dropped off because I couldn't endure it anymore. Just like I'd done other times in my life when people shunned me for coming out against my abuse. Then I carried around the guilt that this man was free to hurt others. You guys definitely have a long list of moral lines you don't mind crossing to get that petty revenge.

After Sophmore year ended and I had my Mother by my side, it seemed to finally calm down. I'd finally made a good hearted friend KC, who is incapable of even musing over the idea of hurting someone. It also renewed my Moms faith that I'd be able to have a life without abusers one day. But you know the expression sweeping a problem under a rug, really is quite suiting because I couldn't act normal after the hell you guys put me through. Plus the years of abusers before you guys got your hands on me, it just couldnt stay sweeped away. Then KC had to move to Springfield, we stayed close but now I was back in that school without the one person I could trust. Do you remember that day Kaelia got everyone riled up to assault me outside the cafeteria? KC surprised me, actually sticking up for me and she stood so strong for someone she loved. Thank goodness for people like ML and KC, cause I really don't think you guys would have let me get out of there alive.

Oh sweet perfect Segway to the next chapter. So girl thinks she falls for a boy, boy doesn't know how to communicate so boy starts belitting girl because maybe that'll work out for him...Different boy, Nayt who is Kaelias brother, tells girl that she deserves better than how this other boy treats her. So she just leaves because she'd kept staying too long before with people trying to make her feel small and she desperately wanted an authentic partnership. Well Nayt begins love bombing her for awhile and she thinks maybe she might have finally found someone healthy. These never seem to last long with narcissists and he quickly becomes extremely controlling, trying to keep her locked up in their shared room. Getting jealous when she wants to go sledding with her gfs, even though she tries to invite him. When she comes back he hasnt calmed down. *Refer back to my post coming out about that night.

Don't worry folks, she survives another attack from an abuser. The next day she tries to come for the rest of her stuff and her cat. Nayt is refusing and watches with amusement as her mother checks if the authorities can help them get their cat back, before Nayt follows through on his threats to murder their cat. She had a hard time getting her cat back because he wasn't chipped and Nayt being a cliche narc just wanted to drag out the tormenting as long as he could. So it would seem Kaelia wasn't the only abusive lover in the family.

You think you can paint this pretty illusion of a commune filled with nurturing love while you lure innocent people to a man with severe anger/control/obsession issues so he can play out his powerful/all knowing cult leader fantasies. I mean I don't actually worry that you'll convince people to move in with you. Youre still hanging out with the same drama obsessed people you were hanging out with 10 years ago, using the same knives to keep stabbing each other in the backs. I sit back and just wait for you to get bored.

I mean I already know you just can't help yourselves, you have to come out occasionally to see if you can wreak havoc in someone's life. No one hears from you for a few years, then you pop up as soon as you hear a potential situation you can manipulate.

Oh, maybe you’ll even go as far as trying to get someone's kid taken away from them just because what?! Nayt has some weird obsession with an ex of mine?! While you desperately have to please him! So why not cause heartbreak in a families Life. Did the situation have anything to do with you? Nope, you just have to be involved in petty arguments. Did you also have the audacity to reach out to me, who was almost killed by Nayt, to see if I would lie about the child's father being physically abusive? Of course, cause maybe you never learned empathy or you've been so damaged by heartless people you've succumbed to being just as heartless.

BUT just in case I was having doubts about how far you'll go to uproot peoples lives for your sick amusement, you admit that the child's mother, whose side you're on, has anger and drinking issues. Going into detail about how she gets so angry she frequently goes into a rages, breaking furniture. I mean come on girl, its like you weren't even trying to hide how shitty you were being. I have to assume you must have thought I'd also let my pain turn me into a monster like you.

WRONG, you were already going down on your first strike: I'm a survivor of a domestic violence attack from the guy you romantically pursued barely 2 weeks after I came to you for comfort. I even akwardly forced myself to stick by your side in hopes that would hear my plea because I thought he was going to physically hurt or try to kill you the way he had me. I don't know whether you really disbelieved me but I do know you're just a terrible friend, which is where your 2nd strike comes in: if you had actually been a friend to me in the first years we met, then you would have known a big part of my Life was and still is defined by being a foster kid. Who was taken away from my biological Mom and my brother. That I had to leave because my Mother was too broken from the damage in her Life to make good decisions and dated men that physically abused us. I grew up without my brother, the security of having a loved one reassure me when Life was hard. A huge healthy dose of all the trauma that would instill insecurities, leading me right into the clutches of abusers like you trying to convince me their toxic love wasn't toxic.

I was really thrown that you thought I'd help you take an innocent child away from a Father that not only loves his daughter but is extremely involved in her development. Especially whenever you carried pain from your own Fathers absence AND you've even been in abusive relationships. Still yet you perpetuate the vicious cycle of little girls not having positive men involved in their Life. For what? The satisfaction of pleasing your alpha male? I mean geeze Melodee you now have this long ass list of ways you're suppressing women.

During the time you ran off with Nayt, I hadn't quite figured out setting my boundaries or knowing the signs that a friendship is toxic but I was trying. So when I started talking to Kaelia again, I remember her being hurt that you just cut off contact with everyone, because she thought her flying monkey would have at least reached out to her first narc love. We even talked about that night Nayt strangled me because I'm sure you're aware she was there and did nothing to stop it. My young, naive self still trauma bonding thought maybe I could regain her respect again if she was finally admitting what happened that night. Wow, it feels so long ago and foreign how poorly I allowed you two to treat me. .

What if I had taken the path you did and succumbed to my hatred? Guess I spent so many years focusing on not becoming jaded that I didn't even think about being filled with doubt and insecurities instead, that were setting me up to develop unhealthy relationships. Its not an easy path but I stuck with it, broke my trauma bonding and finally found genuinely kind people who always remind me how beautiful I am. Reminding me that I didn't deserve all the hurt I endured. Who lift me back up where I belong. My heart is now strong and impenetrable to bullies belitting my experiences.

[diamondsableye]

TERF misinformation going around - and why it’s wrong.

So I got some advice from @terf-tips (Satire account DW), @tifs-against-terfs and @uncanny-tranny so I’m gonna follow that advice.

So this is an ultra condensed version because I know super long posts can be pr intimidating, lets get to the point.  Anon sends in repulsive ask to a TERF blog, I came across the ask while scrolling and found a TERF in the replies.  TERF says that dysphoria is 100% social.  I provide reasons why it isn’t.  TERF then claims that transitioning never treats or helps dysphoria basically ever (while using some extremely transphobic phrasing mind you.)  I was like “WTF no??” and gave resources, and told them to prove their claim.  TERF made a post that for one didn’t even try proving their initial claim, and for another used incredibly dishonest tactics to try and prove it.  I wrote a super substantial post debunking it.  The problem?  TERF turned off replies so no one could see my debunk, and it’s currently catching on in radfem communities.  That’s alright though, because I don’t want to give any more exposure to TERF OP, so here I am.

Study 1 mentioned: “Proof” that being trans was a social contagion, IE “Rapid Onset Gender Dysphoria” (If someone ever brings this up, laugh of them because they obviously see scientific research as a joke) -Research conductor did not interview the actual children, they interviewed the parents instead -The parents were all contacted through gender critical and radfem websites only, creating a huge selection bias -Research conductor’s work wasn’t removed due to “Trans activists”, they were kicked out of academia for being a shit researcher.

Study 2 mentioned: Swedish study analyzing long term effects of SRS -Study compared post SRS trans people to the general population which is not proportional or accurate and messes with the data’s findings -Study acknowledges that they did not correct for this and that the data is skewed -Study does not call for the end of transition, but rather that trans people should have also have other resources available to them for their mental health -The researchers themselves saw TERFs using this study as a way to discredit transition and made a public statement that their data should not be taken this way

Study 3 mentioned: not a study, an article from The Guardian from 2004 -Article too old to be considered accurate anymore -Data was even older and analyzed by a single professor -Data only shows that the older studies weren’t organized well and that the data was inconclusive, nothing along the lines condemning transition

Study 4 mentioned: TERF OP “cites” a report from 2014 -Just shows a screenshot of a conclusion which references the study -Didn’t list the actual study itself, nor the report which referenced it -TERF OP is likely lying and obscuring data -Shown conclusion itself just said that data was inconclusive

Study 5 mentioned: 2016 report on the medical status of trans people from the Obama Administration, TERF OP framed it as looking at all trans medical care -Only looked at the results of SRS -Only looked at trans people 65+ and on medicare -Once again, data was only inconclusive

If you see any of these studies used at all by TERFs, ignore them, they are complete bunk. TERF OP finishes their post with a long ramble about how they’re only trying to help trans people.  My message to anyone who is trans or supports trans people is this: no.  They are lying.  TERFs absolutely do not care about you or your well being at all, if they did they wouldn’t be TERFs.  They only want to make you think they care about you.  Memorize this, if you are trans, or hell even just GNC, TERFs are not on your side, and they never will be.  They may not explicitly say it, but they are fundamentally against your existence.  Remember this and take it to heart.

Below the cut here I have in depth sources about the benefit of medically transitioning, and screenshots of the original debunk.  Transitioning helps trans people, this is not up for debate.  You don’t have to but I encourage you to reblog this to help stop the spread of misinformation.  Take care and stay safe y’all.

TRANSITIONING HELPS TRANS PEOPLE:

https://whatweknow.inequality.cornell.edu/topics/lgbt-equality/what-does-the-scholarly-research-say-about-the-well-being-of-transgender-people/ -ENORMOUS meta-meta-analysis on transgender people and the effect gender transition has on their mental health -Of 56 studies, 52 indicated transitioning has a positive effect on the mental health of transgender people and 4 indicated it had mixed or no results. -ZERO studies indicated gender transitioning has negative results

https://pediatrics.aappublications.org/content/134/4/696 -Longitudinal study on the effectiveness of puberty suppression & sex reassignment surgery on trans individuals in improving mental outcomes -Unambiguously positive results - results indicate puberty suppression, support of medical professionals & SRS have markedly beneficial outcomes to trans individuals’ mental health and productivity.

https://onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/abs/10.1111/j.1365-2265.2009.03625.x -Meta-analysis of studies concerning individuals who underwent sex reassignment surgery -80% of individuals reported significant improvement in dysphoria -78% of individuals reported significant improvement in psychological symptoms -72% of individuals reported significant improvement in sexual function

https://www.jaacap.org/article/S0890-8567%2816%2931941-4/fulltext -Children who socially transition report levels of depression and anxiety which closely match levels reported by cisgender children, indicating social transition massively decreases the risk factor of both.

https://www.eurekalert.org/pub_releases/2015-03/tes-sdc030615.php -“A new study has confirmed that transgender youth often have mental health problems and that their depression and anxiety improve greatly with recognition and treatment of gender dysphoria”

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6223813/ -Longitudinal study which indicates transgender people have a lower quality of life than the general population. -However, that quality of life raises dramatically with ‘Gender Affirming Treatment’, the nature of which is detailed extensively in-text.

SCREENSHOTS OF OG POST DEBUNKING TERF (WARNING, EXTREMELY LONG READ): https://ibb.co/Rg6sP2g (Part 1) https://ibb.co/3hdgQVS (Part 2) https://ibb.co/8gTqWjk (Part 3) https://ibb.co/XCJTPDc (Part 4) https://ibb.co/7JyJM22 (Part 5)

[psychotakublabs]

There have been theories going around that Philip Wittebane, a human who lived in the Demon Realm before Luz, could be Emperor Belos. The evidence seems to be his voice being similar to Belos, Belos’s knowledge of the portal, and his hair resembling Belos’s hair in one of Dana’s countdown art (there could be more evidence but these seem to be the main ones). However, there are a few reasons as to why Belos and Philip are not the same person. These are just my thoughts and theories and I am not 100% discrediting Belos is Philip theory.

Philip Wittebane

In “Keeping Up A-Fear-ances” we got information from Gwendolyn about Philip. He came to the Demon Realm from a substance called Titan’s Blood that is rare and powerful enough to cause leaks between realms. He was living in Bonesborough until he suddenly vanished but not before leaving something in the library. We find out that something was Philip’s diary in “Through the Looking Glass Ruins”. From Luz’s research, Philip seems to be from the 1600s which coincides with Gwendolyn’s great grandmother’s story. Philip could even be older than great grandma Clawthorne as the 1600s are over 400 years ago, meaning this was a tale passed through the ages. From the echo mouse’s screening of Philip’s journal, Philip donated the journal to the library for others to see. Although he states the Demon Realm as horrifying, he is fascinated by this world. He wants to create a portal to the Human Realm to go back home and for other humans to see the Demon Realm. He seems to have been living on the Boiling Isles for some time and may have created the portal. From the journal, we see drawings that have been partially ripped out from the echo mouse that look like a circle and bone, which could entail that he may have studied Glyph magic like Luz.

Emperor Belos

From “Young Blood, Old Souls”, Emperor Belos suddenly arrived over 50 years ago and was on a crusade as a messenger of the Titan. He deemed himself  the only being to speak to the Titan and that magic was used wrong and wild magic causes chaos. He ascended to the throne and has ruled since that time. Belos is the most powerful witch on the Boiling Isles and created the current Coven and magic system. Rules over the Isles with fear and an iron fist. Belos uses technology as his source of “magic” and uses Palisman magic to revive/recharge himself. He stops any potential threats against his reign either by destroying it or attaining it. Emperor Belos wants his hands on the portal for something known as “The Day of Unity” and is creating something big. In Season 2, he is becoming more active but remains hidden from his true goal and identity.

Low Possibility of Philip and Belos Being the Same Person

Diary Entry

From the way Philip speaks in the diary, he seems more fascinated by the Demon Realm than afraid. He stated the Boiling Isles is so horrifying it’s fantastic and wants others to see the realm by finding a way to build the portal. From the shredded remains of the diary, we can see 2 drawings: a bone with a circle etched into it and a circle with another circle through it. This suggests Philip may have studied Glyphs like Luz. He does want to create a portal to go back home but also wants to make one so others can witness the wonderful world of the Demon Realm. From the way he presents himself, it seems he may have been a weirdo much like Luz, embracing the chaotic yet intriguing world of the Boiling Isles, and had good intentions of building a portal.

Day of Unity

Emperor Belos is about conformity, control, and fear when ruling the Boiling Isles. He rewrites history to fit his narrative, seizes or destroys any threats against him, separates magic using a coven system and his title, and punishes those who do not conform. However, he seems to have a sinister plan called “The Day of Unity”. It is not clear what this plan is. All we know is he needs the portal to access the Human Realm and is building an even larger portal gate for something big. Belos went to great lengths to attain it and is knowledgeable about it. The portal is not going to be used for invasion and there have been many theories circulating about what “The Day of Unity” is but we still have no idea what it is.

Both personalities and intentions of using the portal are different. Philip seems to enjoy the chaotic nature of the Boiling Isles and documents his findings/journey. He even donates his diary so others can witness his journey. Although it’s only the first entry and we will know more information in future episodes, it seems Philip was more of an eccentric researcher who wants to share the wonders of the Boiling Isles to others as well as go home. Belos wants control and conformity and despises wild magic despite it being a gift from the Titan. He imprisons anyone who does not follow his “laws” and wants the portal for some type of sinister plan. Belos is manipulative and secretive. He is a dictator who rules with an iron fist and fear. Both are somewhat opposite in terms of personality. In fact, I’d say Philip is like Luz. The only commonality they have is using the portal to access the Human Realm for some goal. There is a theory by Charles J. Thomas (“Emperor Belos is a Possessed Human”) states that Belos is a human possessed by another entity we don't know yet. It could be that Philip may have stumbled across this being and got taken over. So technically Belos is not Philip but is something inhabiting Philip and using him as a vessel.

Portal

From the journal, we can assume Philip made the portal. Eda did say it was very old when she found it and Philip described his journal as a guide on how to create one. Belos seems to be knowledgeable about the portal and wants to attain it. However, he did not know where the portal was before Eda found it. If he is a powerful witch, he could have easily gotten it from Eda by force, but waited for Luz to hand it over. Not only that but Philip donated his journal to the library where he could have made a portal himself but he didn’t. If Emperor Belos and Philip were the same person, Belos would have known where the portal was or know how to build a new one. There are two explanations as to why Belos doesn’t know and could still be Philip. 1) If Philip is possessed and becomes Belos, his memories could either be protected by Philip himself or deteriorated from the possession. 2) There was another party who took the portal and hid it from Belos which is why he didn’t know where it was. It could be both.

Age

Belos came into power around 50 years ago. Since witches and humans age the same, that would roughly make him roughly in his 70s. Philip was in the Boiling Isles in the 1600s, which is at least 400 years before Belos was even born. Although Dana did state that witches and demons can prolong their life, it is unclear if those tactics work on humans. There is also the factor that Philip suddenly vanished 400 years ago and Belos suddenly appeared over 50 years ago. It doesn’t add up. The possibility of prolonging his life over 400 years is magic, but if that were the case there would have been no need to search for the flower of eternal youth in “Sense and Insensitivity”. It is possible he is using Palisman magic to prolong his life. Another possibility is the possession or curse Philip is under ages him differently but at a cost of losing his human form from time to time. 

This doesn’t mean Belos and Philip are not related somehow or refutes the “Belos is a human” theory. Both of them seem to be inventors as Philip made the portal and Belos created his staff and uses technology rather than magic. Belos could still be human because he doesn’t use magic like everyone else and he is very cautious at hiding his identity and past. He could be a descendant of Philip which is why he knows so much about the portal. Belos could also be another human with non blood relation to Philip but came upon his findings. Philip did want to share his knowledge and adventures of the Demon Realm with other humans and it could be possible, he told others from the portal. The human may have had other intentions Philip or others did not agree with and was trapped in the Boiling Isles. This could be the reason for “Day of Unity”. There is also a possibility Belos is not human. There is that mural with King fighting a giant monster. The head of said monster is destroyed, so we have no idea what it looks like. This is suspicious because Belos hid the island’s existence and having the head missing from the mural indicates it is related to Belos somehow. Belos could be that mural monster hiding as a witch or possessing a human for it’s plan. Belos and Philip are still a mystery to us and we won’t know more until future episodes come out. What do you guys think? Do you think Philip and Belos are the same person or two different people? Is Belos a human? Does the mural monster have anything to do with “Day of Unity”? Please let me know what you guys think I love hearing any feedback on who these two could be!

[xenolithium]

It's the Little Things (America/Romano)

"No, I don't want this, I told you I don't want this!" Lovino exclaimed, shoving his plate away with enough force that the contents on the porcelain surface slid off onto the table. The Italian quickly fled from the American's side as he crawled into his bed and wrapped himself in a slew of blankets. He wanted nothing to do with Alfred or the food he brought him, feeling his heart grow heavy as the urge to cry grew stronger. 

Alfred sighed, "and I told you, I couldn't find any authentic Italian dishes around here."

"Well then - well then-!" He was so overcome with emotion that he could hardly get his own words out, gasping in air between each syllable. "I don't want it!" He spat, covering his head with the blankets. 

Alfred was getting a little frustrated. Ever since they had arrived at the hotel to prepare themselves for another meeting, Lovino had been throwing fit after fit. First it was the fact there was a mix up with the hotels, then that they were having seating issues with the meeting location itself, then that he forgot something important at home, as well as the fact that his flight had been cramped and uncomfortable and now, finally, none of the food was familiar enough to him. Which seemed to be cause enough to build up another emotional outburst. How did Alfred get caught up in this? You might be asking yourself. Well, he had decided to insert himself into this situation, back at the airport when they finally arrived at their destination. Seeing Lovino distressed and by himself had been cause enough to have him tag along. Even if he was yelled at and pushed aside at every twist and turn. 

"You can't sit in bed and eat nothing. You don't have a stove here to cook anything for yourself, so unfortunately you're gonna have to eat other people's cooking," Alfred replied through grit teeth.

"That's not cooking, that's microwaved dog shit!" 

"Listen, I'm just trying to look out for you. Would you just eat something?!"

"WELL I DIDN'T ASK FOR IT AND I DON'T NEED IT!" Lovino screeched, pushing the blankets aside to move forward and get in Alfred's face. Which didn't deter the American at all, he simply stood there unfazed as he let the older male enter his personal space. Lovino was panting slightly, hazel eyes glaring into cerulean ones defiantly. "Don't - don't even think about yelling at me again! You got that?! I'm the older one here so show some respect and fuck off!" 

Alfred honestly considered it for a moment because he was getting pretty sick and tired of the verbal abuse, but he held his ground. Not budging or flinching in any way, shape or form. Lovino's act was a bluff, there was always something hidden underneath if you were able to dig deep enough. Anger was a tactic used to push people away and it was a pretty damn good one. Lovino clung to it because it worked, except on him and he could tell that was frustrating the Italian on more than one level. 

"Tell me what's wrong," he said after taking a deep breath to calm his nerves and giving them both a long moment of silence. Lovino returning to his blankets as if he was a child, attempting to hide from the monsters of the world. 

"The only thing that's wrong here is you and that shit sitting on the plate behind you," was the reply Alfred received. The Italian's quivering bottom lip, a tell tale sign that he was close to crying. "I thought I told you to get the fuck out."

"You've eaten food like this before, sure you didn't like it, but you've done it. Why are you so wound up right now?"

"I'm not wound up," he sobbed, rubbing his face with a corner of his blanket. 

"Right…" Alfred whispered as he crawled into the bed to cup Lovino's cheeks, bringing his face out of the sheets so that he could kiss his forehead. "What do you feel? I can't read minds, you know." He didn't get anything but a whimper in reply as Lovino reached up to gently take hold of his wrists. As if not wanting him to part from him. "I know things haven't been going your way and I realize that's really hard on you, when you don't know what's happening or where you're going. That it's the little things that build up and you feel you have no control," Alfred started, smiling when Lovino finally looked at him without a smidge of anger. Like the mask he was wearing before finally cracked wide open, giving way to the hot tears streaming down his face. "But I'm here, right? I want to help you feel better, you don't have to sit here by yourself or be upset by yourself."

"I'm sorry…" he finally whispered out after a long moment of simply staring at each other. 

"I know. It's okay, it's always okay," he whispered, watching as Lovino finally turned away from his gaze to lay his head on his chest and sob. The American pulled him close as he sat himself fully atop the bed, rubbing Lovi's back with gentle soothing circles as he wept. 

"This is stupid."

"It's not stupid. Your emotions aren't stupid and you're not stupid either."

"Yes I am, I'm stupid, I'm useless, I can't do-" Alfred placed a hand over his mouth to silence him. 

"Positive things, let's say positive things. You're hardworking, you're an amazing cook, you can dance like no other," Alfred started, watching Lovino lean back to roll his eyes at the last one. Al's hand was still on his mouth, but he could feel the smile tugging at Lovino's lips against his palm even if he couldn't see it. "You're amazing at gardening, you're sure as hell better at drawing than me."

"Now that's just unfair to you," Lovino said, his voice muffled, but the small laugh that followed was all Al needed to grin himself. 

"How dare you, what are you trying to say?"

"I'm not saying anything," he said, wiping the now drying streaks from his face. 

"That's a lie," Alfred teased, flopping down onto the bed and dragging Lovino to lay next to him, who seemed to be calming down now. Taking in deep breaths as he lay there, closing his eyes to better focus on the rise and fall of his chest rather than his own anxiety. 

Alfred let a quiet moment pass between them, not saying a single thing as he watched the older nation relax beside him. His own eyes eventually drifting upwards where he took in the crappy popcorn ceiling and the dingy fan that they found out didn't work the moment they stepped in. He turned his gaze back though when he heard Lovino laughing to himself, the Italian shifting his body on the bed to face him. 

"What's so funny?" Alfred grinned. 

"You."

"Why am I funny?" He asked in amusement, raising a brow. 

"Cause I just thought of you eating that slop over there with a smile and thinking it's good," he chuckled again. 

"Hey, with enough ketchup, I can make anything taste good." Lovino rolled his eyes. "Don't discredit the power of a good condiment."

"Americans," Lovino whispered under his breath, before shaking his head. "You're an idiot."

"Back to the insults, huh?"

"I didn't mean it like that."

Alfred inched closer, "then how did you mean it? Maybe you meant I'm cute~"

Lovino snorted and shoved him playfully, before getting up. Not giving him an answer to his guess as he moved to get his shoes on, Alfred shooting up in concern as he watched Lovino get ready to leave. Wondering what was going on until, their eyes met again. "Let's find something actually edible, this time I'm choosing."

"Are you sure?"

"What? Now you're against me eating? You wouldn't shut up about it before," Lovi huffed, shoving his hands in his pockets. 

"No, it's not that. It's just...do you feel like you can leave?"

"I'm not made of glass." When Alfred still looked worried, he sighed. "Yes, I'm fine. Let's just get this over with, okay? I wanna take a siesta."

Alfred's expression changed to one of relief, standing up and getting himself ready. Quickly following Lovino as he opened the door to exit, though he paused to grab the keys they almost forgot as they left. He really didn't need to add that on top of everything else. For now Lovino's mood had improved and he hoped to keep it that way.  

---

I feel like Lovino acts the way he does because of anxiety and fear. He figures by lashing out and cursing people out that he can keep them at arm's length and usually it works. I wanted to showcase here, how being unsure of his environment and certain aspects about where he is and what he's doing can cause a lot of distress for him. In the end he had a breakdown over it, but luckily Al was there to walk him through it, even if it was hard for him to do so.