#i saw christian grey played by and was like

[veryinnovative]

to celebrate reaching 50k with the amazing @thisliminalspacedaydreams a little moodboard sneak peek.....

[bookwyrminspiration]

omg, it’s so cool when books reference each other, I can’t believe hamlet is quoting 50 shades of grey here that’s beautiful <3

[therealcocoshady]

Kinktober - Day 21 - Aftercare

Kinktober 2024 Masterlist

A/N : Here is the aftercare post for Kinktober (yeah, we're still doing that). I think it's the longest I have written so far... But I hope you enjoy it ✨

CW : Dom!Marshall x Sub!reader - Aftercare - A little angst - Fluff

After that weekend Marshall spent taking care of you, you could feel a slight change in the dynamic. He was still your dom, still your friend, but there was more intimacy than ever. He often instructed you to snuggle with him, sit on his lap and, though your quarters were technically still in the guest room, you slept in his bed practically every night you were at his place. It started with him suggesting some cockwarming at bedtime, since you’d both taken a liking to it, but it was now standard for him to just suggest cuddling, and you happily indulged him.  It didn’t mean he went any softer on you as a dom, though. If anything, he kept on challenging you, the more comfortable you got as a sub. But you sure enjoyed the cuddling, as well as the more frequent kissing during aftercare. The two of you seemed to have found a steady rhythm and things were great, even though the lines were starting to blur a little. At the beginning, your submission and his dominance were only exerted on weekends and, though you saw each other on other occasions, the rest of the time was strictly platonic. But as time went on, it started bleeding in your friendship. Whenever you were alone with him, you leaned into your submissive side and let him take the lead. It had become second nature, by now, and though none of you exactly addressed it, both of you seemed to enjoy it. 

The only clear boundary that remained was that none of your mutual friends and acquaintances knew what was going on between the two of you. As far as they were concerned, you just happened to be at Marshall’s place frequently, and they assumed it had to do with what they jokingly called « nerdy shit ». One of the perks of being longtime friends meant that people around you didn’t bat an eye. Throughout the year, there had been a couple of jokes about the two of you being some kind of match but both of you had always brushed it off. For years, you had joked about him being too old and boring for you and, in turn, he referred to you as « the nightmare for any boyfriend », so people had stopped questioning it. You liked the privacy of it all, the fact that Marshall being your dom was your secret, some sort of safe place no one knew about. You were in sync and you didn’t question it. Until you did. 

The session had begun like any other before that. You were spending the weekend at his place, and he had summoned you to the bedroom. It wasn’t anything out of the ordinary, really. Just him, enjoying you, exploring your body and your limits, while you let him guide you, enjoying the mix of pleasure, struggle and pain. Surprisingly enough, even though he was a dom, he wasn’t kinky in a way you would have deemed as hardcore or elaborate. Before starting this whole dynamic, you would have expected any dom to be some sort of version of Christian Grey, with a huge collection of kinky objects and torture devices and a pleasure room that bordered on creepy. Nothing could be farther from the dom you knew. There weren’t too many toys, definitely no torture device and most scenes took place in cozy bedrooms that belonged on Pinterest rather that in any X-rated movie. And even though Marshall definitely liked to challenge you, it didn’t involve a lot of objects and equipment. Somehow, you had figured that, if you were to freak out during a session, it would be during a scene that was elaborate and intimidating, not one with simple restraints and light impact play. Obviously, you were wrong. 

The night had been quite intense, but very, very pleasurable. Marshall had guided you through multiple orgasms and, eventually, you found yourself in subspace. It wasn’t the first time and you enjoyed the dreamlike, floating feeling, losing yourself in the sensations your dom provided, rooted in your connection, in the trust you had in him. No anxieties, no overthinking, just you, surrendering yourself to him. But then, out of nowhere, something shifted. It was subtle, almost like a fleeting shadow in your mind, but it was enough. You couldn’t exactly tell why, though. But suddenly, your peace shattered, replaced by an intense rush of confusion, vulnerability and fear. Panic surfaced, and you found yourself using your safe word. Or rather, screaming it, before you could even fully process what was wrong. 

As soon as you called « red », Marshall froze and stopped everything. In seconds, he was freeing you from your restraints, kneeling beside you. He pushed your hair out of your face. You were shuddering, feeling both cold and hot at the same time and, overall, a sweaty mess. « You’re safe. I’ve got you », he said softly, in a low voice, but you couldn’t bring yourself to meet his gaze. As your body began to come down of the intensity, you felt a crushing weight of emotions you didn’t understand. He tried cupping your face, as he had done thousands of times before, but you immediately pulled away. You wrapped your arms around yourself, feeling more vulnerable than ever. « I-I don’t… », you trailed off, your words stuck in your throat as your thoughts swirled, completely detached from the clarity you had felt just minutes earlier. Your dom stayed quiet, giving you some time, though you could feel his concerned, even if you didn’t look at him. « It’s ok if you’re not ready to talk. Take your time. That’s alright. We’ll go slow», he said gently. You nodded and tried to steady your breathing, but you could feel yourself dipping further into a haze of doubt and discomfort— subdrop. You had read about it but had never imagined it would feel this intense. In the past, you’d felt a need for some comforting aftercare following sessions with Marshall, but this was different.  You could still feel the weight of his touch, the sound of his voice, and it left you confused, even fearful in a way that didn’t make sense to you. Marshall slowly got up and grabbed the fuzzy blanket that was at the foot of the bed, gently wrapping it around your shoulders, making sure not to touch you directly. Then, he grabbed a bottle of water from his nightstand and handed it to you. « This is for you. You don’t have to talk just yet. Just breathe, ok ? » he instructed. 

The warmth of the blanket seemed to help, and you managed a small sip of water, focusing on grounding yourself. Marshall didn’t move, staying within sight but giving you the physical space you visibly needed. Everything in his calm demeanor suggested he’d been there before, and that it was not exactly unknown territory for him. His gaze was gentle, watching you carefully but without pressure. Gradually, the silence grew less tense, and your heartbeat slowed. You looked up at him, catching his eye for the first time since you had used your safe word. He looked concerned but relaxed, his expression one of patience and kindness. You could see that he was stressing out a bit, too, as if he was afraid he’d done something wrong. « Marshall, I… », you struggled, your voice just above a whisper, not even realizing you hadn’t used his title as you should have. As if your brain were unable to process it in that instant. « I… I don’t know what happened. I was… scared. But I’m not sure why », you tentatively explained. He nodded thoughtfully, reaching forward and resting his hand beside you, close without touching. « That’s ok. Sometimes, things come up and you don’t know why. It happens. But you don’t need to understand it all right now, alright ? And I’m here to help you through it », he said in a reassuring tone. « I’m sorry », you mumbled, almost feeling ashamed. He shook his head and held your gaze. « No need to apologize, doll. You didn’t do anything wrong and, in case you need to hear it : I’m not mad. I don’t want you to feel bad for using your safe word. Ever. You did well », he assured you. You nodded and let out a small sigh of relief. « Well… Thank you for stopping » you said. He let out a low chuckle and gave you a smile. « That’s what safe words are for. You’re safe with me, Y/N. Always », he said. 

The two of you sat in silence, your breathing slowly returning to normal. He was sitting quietly beside you, giving you some time. Gradually, your shoulders began to relax, though your hands were still curled in tight fists, gripping the blanket as though it anchored you. After a while, he softly cleared his throat. « Is it ok if I touch you? Just to hold you for a bit? » he asked in a low and gentle voice. You looked at him, your eyes searching his face for reassurance. His question, simple and respectful, made you feel safer. You nodded slowly. « Yeah. Ok. » you whispered.  Moving carefully, Marshall slipped his arm around your shoulders, pulling you close but without any hint of pressure. You leaned into him, feeling the warmth of his embrace begin to ease the ache in your chest. His arm settled lightly around you, his other hand reaching to softly hold yours, his thumb tracing gentle circles over your knuckles. « I’ve got you. You are safe » he murmured. « Nothing bad is going to happen, I promise ». 

You closed your eyes, letting his words sink in. His voice held a warmth you didn’t known you needed until you heard it—a quiet reassurance that made you feel grounded. The simple comfort of his steady, gentle touch was like an anchor pulling you back from the drift of emotions you couldn’t quite control. « Thank you », you whispered, your fingers finding his. You let your head rest on his shoulder while his fingers traced soothing patterns against your skin. Both of you remained silent for a while, his quiet presence easing the rawness you were feeling. His breaths were steady and rhythmic, encouraging you to slow down and match his pace. After a while, he finally spoke again. « Do you think you can talk? I need to make sure you’re alright », he said. You nodded and he proceeded with some questions. « Are you feeling any physical pain right now? » he asked carefully. You shook your head before looking at your wrists. « Not really. I mean, the wrists but it’s not… really painful. Just stings. Like usual, I guess. Other than that, I’m just a little sore » you said thoughtfully. He nodded and gently inspected your wrists. The restraints had left some marks, mostly caused by your moving and tugging, but there was nothing really concerning. «And now that you’re a little more clear-headed, is there anything you remember that might have triggered you? Did I hurt or scare you? » he finally asked. You shook your head again. In truth, you couldn’t quite place your finger on whatever it was that went wrong. « No, you were great. You always are. It’s just… It felt so good. I thought I’d never come down. I didn’t want to. But suddenly I did and it was all too much, you know? ». He nodded and placed a tender kiss on your forehead. « Right, » he hummed. « I mean, subdrop happens for many reasons. But sometimes it’s just a chemical imbalance. You have these hormone levels that peak and when they drop, well… You drop too. And you can also have a peak of stress hormones. But it’s nothing to be scared of, doll. And I’m here. » 

You nodded, grateful for his presence and the serenity he brought. He engulfed you in another embrace, kissing your temple. The two of you lay back down for a minute as he held you, murmuring sweet words of praise and reassurance. When he could tell you were feeling better, more level-headed, he grabbed your hand and led you to the en-suite bathroom. It was a ritual by now : the two of you usually showered together, before he tended to any soreness or marks you could end up with. He held you close as you let the warm water pour over your bodies, washed your body and massaged your hair. When you were done, he wrapped you in a towel and handed you a glass of water and some aspirin that you drank while he applied some cream to take care of your sore muscles. He also gently examined the couple of bruised he had caused, kneeling in front of you to inspect them. « They’re not as bad as last time. We’re making progress » he softly hummed, causing you to chuckle as you remembered both of your faces when you had discovered the bruising he was referring to, some of which were still faintly visible. If there was one thing you’d learned about your body since you became his sub, it was that you bruised like a peach. He instinctively kissed the bruise on your thigh, causing you to squirm. « Sorry. Habits. I’m sorry. Didn’t mean to scare you. » he apologized. « No, it’s your beard… Tickles. That’s all. The kiss was ok. Helps the healing, right? » you replied with a slight smile. He nodded and placed another playful kiss there, before proceeding to kiss all of your bruises, making you giggle in the process. He got up and cupped your face before kissing your lips. « Oops. Thought you had a bruise there. Guess it was a shadow » he said innocently. Of course, his charm offensive had you giggling like a schoolgirl, which you knew was the desired outcome. « I’ll leave you to do the whole hair thing and get dressed while I tidy up » he said before placing a last kiss on your temple. 

You quickly blowdried your hair and went to put on your pajamas. Before getting dressed, you looked at your naked form in the mirror. You were used to seeing your reflection with hickies, bruises and various marks over your body. The view wasn’t surprising in the least. It had almost become usual in the past months so, most of the time, you weren’t phased by it. You even found it pleasing, in a way. Each mark was a physical reminder of the pleasure he gave you, of how good he made you feel, rewarding your submission with intense orgasms. 

This time, though, as you took notice of them, it stirred something deep within you. You traced each one with your finger, wondering what this roadmap of your intense bedroom exertions told of you. You wondered how anyone would perceive them if you suddenly died and your body was to be found the next day. They’d probably peg you for some victim of domestic abuse. Except you weren’t. You had consented to everything that had left these marks. You had given Marshall your explicit, enthusiastic consent to hurt you, and you had enjoyed it. Suddenly, you felt like some sort of hypocrite. There you were, the annoying woman who never shied away from getting on her high horse to defend the cause of women, allowing a man to hurt you. He was your friend, had been for years. And yet, he was the one leaving all these marks, because you allowed him to see your vulnerability. You even served it to him on a silver plater, kneeling for him, surrendering your body and mind. And you liked it. As unsettling as the thought was, you craved it, the feeling of submission. 

However, this had you wondering about the shift in your relationship. The friendship had been so steady for years and now, there were many changes going on all at once. You were so much more than friends and, usually, you didn’t care that the lines were blurred. You even enjoyed it. But when you really looked at it, the whole thing felt like a complex Venn diagram with layers of friendship, sex, emotional intimacy and power dynamic overlapping each other. Even if you tried, you wouldn’t be able to sort it out. But who were you allowing to leave these marks all over you ? Your friend ? Your dom ? The man you slept with ? Or the one who charmed your heart and spirit ? A while ago, you would have been able to give a clear answer. To say that it was your dom who was doing it to you. But now, it was much more complex. Because the power dynamic was bleeding into the friendship, which bled back into the power dynamic, and both were made confusing by the sudden surge of emotional intimacy. And in the middle of it, you had sex, which belonged in all three categories. Marshall was doing it all : bringing physical benefits into your friendship, fucking you senseless as your dom, and making sweet love to you. And now, everything was blurry and unclear. He was the alpha and omega in all of that, carving a space for himself in all the spheres of your life, as dom, lover and friend, but where did that leave you ? What were you to him ? The uncertainty gnawed at you, and even deeper than that, a new fear settled in your chest. Marshall had become such an integral part of your life, so much so that you felt yourself holding your breath when you thought about the possibility of losing him. This space he occupied in your world was huge, almost overwhelming. What happens if it stops? If he decides he doesn’t want this anymore? Or if I can’t handle it?

You didn’t realize you were trembling until there was a gentle knock on the bathroom door. You turned and saw Marshall standing there, visibly wondering what was taking you so long. « Talk to me » he said in a reassuring voice, which felt like an invitation rather than an order. You took a deep breath, trying your best to summon the right words. « It’s all twisted », you said. He looked at you intently, waiting for you to elaborate, but you didn’t quite know how to put it. « What’s twisted, Y/N? » he asked carefully. You nervously gestured at the bruises that covered your naked body. « These. This. The fact that I’m letting a man hurt me. That I want it. I-… There has to be something wrong with me. I must be twisted. I must be messed up. » you blurted out. 

Marshall shook his head gently, moving closer but keeping his hands at his sides, as if he was letting you control the space between you. « There’s nothing wrong with you, » he said softly. « Desire isn’t something that fits into neat, ‘normal’ boxes. It’s complex, and it’s different for everyone. It doesn’t make you twisted—it makes you human. » he continued. Though his voice felt like a balm, the other questions remained, as did the need for answers. « But it’s not just that. Because you’re the one I desire, but who are you? We were friends for so long and now we’re… this. But I don’t know what that is. What we are to each other...». He hummed, encouraging you to elaborate. « I know you’re over boxes and neat categories but… Are you my friend ? My dom ? Or something more intimate than those ? » you finally asked. He listened quietly and, when your eyes met his, you were met with a steady and reassuring gaze. « Yeah », he simply said. « So which is it? » you nervously asked, though his calm and reassurance did not waiver. « All of them. What we have… It doesn’t need a label. And I know it’s a bit complex but… It can be whatever we want or need it to be » he said softly. His words were grounding but you still felt the fear beneath it all. « But what if it stops? » you anxiously asked. « Because I’d lose so much. I’d lose my friend, my dom and… more. You’re such a huge part of my life, and I’m scared of what happens if we don’t work, if it becomes too much». 

Marshall reached out, carefully grabbing your hand, holding it and stroking it. « I don’t ever want you to feel like this is all or nothing. I’m here because I care about you—deeply. I don’t want to give up our friendship, no matter what happens. If you ever want to go back to that, just as friends, I’ll be here. Or if you want to keep this dynamic, but take sex out of the equation—that’s fine, too. This doesn’t have to look like anyone else’s relationship. We can take our time. We can make it ours. », he assured you. You looked at him, letting his words slowly sink into you. « But what do you want? » you asked. He let out a soft sigh but kept on smiling. « I just told you what I want. I’ll break it down for you : whatever happens, I want us to be friends. That’s what matters most. The power dynamic that’s… that’s what works for me. That’s how I feel comfortable when it comes to intimacy. The rules, the boundaries… They make me feel safe. You know more than anyone that I suck at letting people in. So it’s what works best for me when it comes to being close with someone. Knowing I’m in control helps me navigate my trust issues. We’ve been friends for ages. We were already close. But now we’re closer. Both physically and emotionally, and I like that. But if you’re not comfortable with anything, we adjust. If you only want or need me as a friend, that’s cool. If you need me as your dom, that’s fine too. In whatever way you want. If you want the dynamic to be strictly platonic, no sex, touching kept to a minimum, no kissing, it’s possible too. It’s your choice. »

You sighed and nodded, sort of understanding where he was coming from. However, you couldn’t help but ask one last question. « And if I don’t want things to be platonic but don’t want the dynamic? ». He stared at you intently, rubbing the back of his neck. « That’s not how I work. As much as we’re friends, as comfortable as I am with you, I need structure. But if it’s that important… I guess we could adjust it. Do you want the power exchange to stop? » he asked carefully, and you could sense a hint of nervosity. You shook your head. « I don’t. I like our dynamic. And the rest, too. It’s just… I always thought it was a way to clear the noise in my head. But now, it’s becoming a part of it. Like… I know you said you care about me, and that we can adjust, but… It’s still confusing. Because even if I like it, right now, I don’t know how to address the person in front of me. Sir? Marshall? ». He chuckled and brought you closer to him, affectionately cupping your face. His face had softened and you could see a gentle smile at the corner of his mouth. « Whatever you like, doll. It doesn’t have to be a big deal. Honorifics, titles… yeah, they can have a purpose, and they can set a tone, but they don’t change the substance of what we are » he explained. 

You looked at him, uncertainty still clouding your eyes. « I just… I don’t want to mess it up, » you murmured. « I want to honor this new part of us, but at the same time, I feel like I’m trying to balance everything we’ve always been, and it’s… confusing ». He nodded in understanding, letting his thumb graze your cheek. His smile grew a little and he finally let out a chuckle. « Look, you can call me Sir when that feels right. You can call me Marshall when we’re just us, talking like this. And for all I care, you can even call me ‘Dumbass’ or ‘Old Man’ like you used to. » His eyes twinkled with a hint of mischief, and a grin broke across his face. « You’ve called me worse over the years, haven’t you? ». A reluctant smile tugged at your lips, a bit of the weight lifting from your shoulders. You thought of the years you’d spent as friends, all the teasing, the playful jabs. You’d called him every name in the book, from “Dumbass” when he’d done something stupid, to « asshole » when he was pissing you off, to “Old Man” whenever he pretended he couldn’t keep up with you. « Yeah, I have », you admitted with a faint chuckle. « See? » he replied, his tone gentle and light. « You’re not any sub, Y/N. You’re much more than that. And regardless of how you choose to call me, it won’t change the substance of what we mean to each other ». 

You gave him a smile and couldn’t help but ask one last question, a playful smile tugging at your lips. « So… Does this mean I can call you ‘Dumbass’ and not get punished? » you asked in an innocent voice. He rolled his eyes and shook his head. « Fuck around and find out, princess » he replied with a suggestive smirk. You raised an eyebrow, ready to make a witty reply but he rolled his eyes again pretended to sigh. « You’re impossible. We’re not even done with aftercare and you’re looking for trouble already » he said with a smile. You let out an innocent giggle. « Aren’t we done, though? » you asked with a hint of seriousness. He shook his head and grabbed your hand before pulling you to him. « You know, aftercare is not just for subs. Doms need it too. There’s no need to be self-centered, here » he said with a soft grin. You hummed and looked in his eyes. « What do you need, then, Sir? » you asked in a tone that was both suggestive and reverent. He gave you a grin and led you to the bedroom. « Cuddles » he calmly hummed, as if the answer was evident. You couldn’t help but smile to yourself, resisting the urge to tell him that all he needed to do was ask, instead of using the aftercare excuse. You settled in bed and he gestured for you to come into his arms. « Indulge me, will you? » he asked and you couldn’t help but scoff. « Of course. For aftercare’s sake » you said in an innocent, yet sarcastic tone. 

He wrapped his arms around you, pulling you close, and you let yourself melt into his warm embrace. It felt like you fitted there perfectly, as if you were meant to occupy that space into his arms and against his chest. « There we go » he murmured, almost whispering, as he stroked your back in soothing motions. « See? This doesn’t need labels. Just us. That’s what matters most to me ». You smiled against him and hummed, closing your eyes. « That’s nice » you admitted. You let yourself breathe fully, feeling a sense of peace settling in your chest, chasing away the earlier doubts you’d felt. The warmth and steadiness of Marshall’s arms around you made you feel safe in a way words couldn’t fully capture. You let the anxiety you’d felt earlier leave your mind and went back to enjoying the profound feeling of intimacy. Ever since your friendship had become more, you had grown closer and, as weeks had gone by, the cuddling had become more intimate. You could feel it in the way he held you and seemed to relax completely, the way he allowed himself to doze off, keeping you close, face buried in your neck. You let out a contented sigh, relishing in the intense feeling of safety and devotion. 

« Thank you, Sir » you whispered in a barely audible voice. You could feel him smile against you, softly humming. « For what? » he asked. « For giving me so much » you tentatively explained, not sure you could actually put your gratitude into words. He hummed again and placed a tender kiss on your neck. « I know it’s a bit confusing for you. But it’s precisely because you’re my friend and my sub that I’m able to relax and put my walls down. I feel safe with you » he explained. « I’m grateful for you ». You turned and looked at him, staring in this blue eyes, seeing nothing but devotion there. In the years you’d known him, you’d learned about his trust issues, but hearing him tell you you made him feel safe when he was the person who made you feel the most secure was emotional. You knew intimacy didn’t come easy for him, even though it sometimes escaped your mind. As if he could read into your mind, he chortled and pulled you closer. « I’m grateful you signed that NDA, too. So you can’t go around and tell everyone I’m soft or whatever. That’d ruin my reputation and everyone would ask for cuddles » he joked. You chuckled and looked at him with a mischievous grin. Even without any NDA, you wouldn’t dream of telling anyone. You liked that he was like this with you, and you didn’t really want to share. « Your secret’s safe with me… Dumbass ». 

[artist-block-alley]

why did you make the spy vs spy ship heterosexual? don't tell me you're that kinda christian...

This is a sentiment I’ve been seeing a very strange amount of on a certain other platform but I might as well address it here--

My reasoning is honestly incredibly simple: I saw how the spies fell for ladies in the comics, plus the grey spy's thing being using her allure to fool them both. Thought it was cute and that it could be fun to have that dynamic with the two spies themselves by r63ing one of them on top of making it more genuine.

Plus just being real, I like the dynamic a guy and a lady bring for a ship. Does my faith play a part in preferring this? Yes it does, but I also just like the different cute things you can do when you pair the opposite sex, it hits different.

Now I'm no stranger to the fanart, I was well aware of the popular ship for these two well before revisiting this after over a decade. I just decided to tackle it in a way I'd actually enjoy it + using evidence of things I've seen in the source material itself.

[mask131]

So many lasting Greek mythology misinterpretation today could be avoided so simply if people just thought about what they are saying and doing. Really, it's just a question of thinking in a logical way.

Like Medusa, you know? There are so many people who literaly didn't notice that there was a slight problem when you said on one side "Medusa was the daughter of primordial two gods, and the sister of many monsters and dragons of Greek mythology" and on the other "She was a regular human priestess turned into a monster by the gods". For them it was just... normal, I guess? When the answer to this incoherence is just quite simple: Medusa started out, in Greek mythology, as a divine monster born out of the primordial forces of the world ; the story of Medusa as a human priestess comes from Roman literature when they reinvented the Greek myths. People just confused the two: as simple as that.

But people don't want to look at the incoherences of the "popular culture" version of mythology, apparently. I was doing this post initially upon seeing yet again depictions of Zeus and Poseidon as old men with white beards. Which is something that always bugs me for one simple reason: Everybody agrees and says the Greek gods are eternally young and cannot age. Why then are Zeus and Poseidon, THE gods by default, always depicted as old men?

For many people it's simple and clear-cut, somehow, but it is such a massive incoherence, especially since all the other gods are shown as young. And the answer is so simple if people just bothered looking for it: Zeus and Poseidon, were bearded men in Ancient Greek art, but had BLACK beards (or "blue" depending on if you understand literaly the Homeric names). They were adult men, but not OLD men (as opposed to the "beardless youth", who were basically in their 20s whereas the "bearded gods" are like... in their 30s or something).

The whole "old thing" is just resulting on the HUGE reinvention Europe made of Greek mythology from the Renaissance onward, mixing the "All Greek statues are white, so the gods were white-like" misunderstanding with the old, "acceptable" concept that god-rulers had to be like the Biblical or Christian patriarchs, elderly men with white or grey beards.

I don't mind per se the idea of Zeus or Poseidon being an older guy, because it is indeed now part of popular culture and it has been around for too many centuries to ignore or reject. Plus, it can be a good way to fight the ageism inherent to Greek mythology by depicting gods as elderly but still beautiful and "perfect" (which is what Renaissance art onward actually did). But it doesn't change the fact that it is not accurate to Greek mythology, and that it is HUGE and ancient misunderstanding.

Like Dionysos or Aphrodite being fat - it is something acceptable and understandable today, and it is justifiable in many ways (from cultural precedent to positive evolutions of our modern era)... But it is still a reinvention of Greek mythology, and not a faithful reproduction or an accurate depiction of how the Greek gods were. Because Ancient Greeks were fatphobic as fuck, to use modern terms. But beyond that, we enter into the whole debate of the artistic freedom, and the importance of reinventing and playing with myths and legends to keep them "alive", and that's an entirely different topic.

(Funnily enough, since I am bringing the Aphrodite business: yes, making her fat or middle-aged is not accurate to how the Greeks saw her, and is bringing modern era ideals, if Renaissance can be considered "modern", to Ancient matters. At least with the Romans, there's something justifiable because they had a "mother-goddess" thing going on with Venus, but for the Greeks Aphrodite was young and fat was ugliness, that's for certain. HOWEVER! The funny thing is that all those comics and movies depicting Aphrodite as a literal pin-up with a tiny waist but a huge butt and enormous boobs is just as inaccurate and "wrong" compared to the Ancient Greeks beauty canon. Because while Ancient Greeks hated people being too fat or too skinny, considering this "ugly", they also disliked people being too "developed". When a guy was too muscular, or had too large of a dick, he was considered ugly and visually "vulgar" (which is why grotesque figure like the satyrs had these huge sexual organs, and statues of the gods had tiny ones ; and Herakles doesn't look as much of a bodybuilder as super-hero comics depict him). So to have Aphrodite as just big boobs and butt on a stick is basically also making a goddess that the Ancient Greeks would have deemed ugly and "vulgar"/"grotesque", if not repulsive.

So you know... We can criticize the mainstream media alongside the new reinventions of today, because EVERYBODY'S WRONG and that's the fun of it Xp)

[juminies]

I present myself as a Jumin bad story ending 2 hater in the grand scheme of things, but there is a lot of nuance to it. The thing is, I actually think it functions very well as a bad ending and does an incredible job of showing the negative path Jumin could fall down very quickly given the opportunity. It allows a prime look into his mindset and his brain and really opens him up to let the player properly see the deeply buried, traumatised, grimy parts we only narrowly skim otherwise. In that sense I hate it in the way you're supposed to dislike any bad ending: this is not where we should have ended up; this is not how I, the player, should have acted; it's uncomfortable and upsetting and makes you go Oh, oh no. If people were normal about bad ending 2 I would lovehate it in the way I have written long analysis posts about how normal ending is a bit fucked.

However, when I say "I hate BE2" really what I'm talking about is the way people simply were not ready for it to exist in the way it did, especially not at the time it did. A large proportion of the game's audience did not see BE2 and look through the surface dynamic, and instead completely ignored everything the game was trying to show regarding Jumin using BE2. They saw the CG and went "hehe BDSM, this is just like Christian Grey <3" and that was that. It led to massive flanderisation of his character by a concerningly large proportion of people who played and didn't play! the game. And sure, on one hand, if you really want to overlook Jumin as a character to fulfil your fantasy then okay. It's an otome game, the fantasy is the point. But it's frustrating as someone who loves Jumin so much to see people get him so wrong because they won't step away from 2016/2017 fanon. I still(!!) see people intertwining his BE2 outlook with his good end outlook, as if they're the same, which is absolutely wild considering both the layers of character development he goes through in the following days and the fact that it legitimately does not make sense that he would act like he does in BE2 if MC does not have her BE2 personality. You can obviously acknowledge that that part of him (the fear, the possessiveness) exists/ed on some level—in fact, please do! He's very multifaceted and it's important to note that he's not perfect! But you can do that without using it to heinously mischaracterise him. I could get into the ultimately what Jumin wants is whatever you want, he thrives on seeing his partner happy and feeling good side of it, but it's barely even relevant if what you're trying to do is tell me that Jumin is a sadist. He's not even a sadist IN bad ending 2

[bookofmirth]

For gwynriel, I’m not sure how sjm is going to incorporate sex into their relationship, if she does but I think she will since she talked about how Azriel is a freak & there have been scenes playing in her head, but I’m really curious to how it will be put in. I wonder if she’s going to have them become very close friends with Gwyn teaching Azriel valkyrie training, their banter becoming intense, them being competitive and maybe they start fwb. He helps her become comfortable with male touch (I think her becoming comfortable will start with them training though) & helping her take control/claim of her own body. He’ll understand her boundaries, respect her and consent will be very important to him. Like that one anon said, I could see a teacher/student thing going on and even a dom/sub, but not necessarily about power. A respectful balance. Companionship. Understanding. Az teaching Gwyn and encouraging her. Wanting her to feel comfortable in her body. To feel safe. He will want her to make sure she knows she is in control (she can use a safe word) and can let him know when to stop at any time. Every time they have sex will be a different/new experience. It won’t always be freaky. It can be comforting as well. Or they can start with sex it’s soft and once she gets more comfortable, it can gradually become freaky.

If they do become fwb, I kind of want them to have crushes on each other first, even if both are oblivious to each others feelings, because I could see E/riel’s saying “y’all aren’t complaining about them having sex but when az was fantasizing about elain it wasn’t okay”, so it would be easy to say Azriel saw Gwyn beyond sexual fantasies unlike Elain. I understand Gwyn when it comes to be being assaulted. It hits close to home. I can’t speak for everyone that is a survivor of assault, but I read how some survivors of sa find healing through bdsm. I don’t think Azriel will be full on Christian Grey. He won’t be sadistic. I could see bondage, shibari, blindfold, impact play (nothing too harsh), dirty talk, praise & a few other things. The most important thing for me, is that Gwyn is happy and that she can heal. Also, I think it would be cute if they go book shopping together and pick out books for each other. I’m sorry for how long this is!!

He helps her become comfortable with male touch (I think her becoming comfortable will start with them training though) & helping her take control/claim of her own body. He’ll understand her boundaries, respect her and consent will be very important to him.

See, this is how it would make sense to happen. SJM saying that Az is a freak doesn't mean their first sexy or romantic encounter is necessarily going to be full-on sex dungeon hardcore - and even if it were, that could be absolutely what the characters need and want. What is healing and emotionally fulfilling for one person can be completely different for another.

But Az being a freak also doesn't negate consent! Or eliminate his awareness of Gwyn's emotional state! I know people use this as a gotcha for gwynriel not happening, but sjm has already written sexual relationships that are consensual, thoughtful, and considerate of the characters' history and emotions. (Plus acting like survivors across the board can never have sex is just gross.) Obviously she has written other types, but that's not what we are talking about here, clearly. She always makes that distinction obvious.

And the thing is, it looks different for everyone. Like you said, different approaches can put Gwyn back in control of the situation - that can include bondage or blindfolds or non-missionary style sex which can be just as healing and right for that character. It just shows, to me, a lack of empathy and an assumption that one person's experience is universal. If healing were one-size-fits-all, then the whole therapy/psychology business would be done. They'd find The Answer and then pack up shop.

I'd expect that, if we were to see things like that between Az and Gwyn, then Gwyn would be the one calling the shots. She'd be in control.

But also, I'm curious how much of the "freaky" exists purely in her head, and how much would make it to the page. She never even gave us that threesome in acosf :(

I think it would be cute if they go book shopping together and pick out books for each other.

I LOVE THIS. Gwyn is already research-minded and reading romance novels. She's already curious. That can definitely extend beyond seeing what happens in romance novels, especially if she gets to put things into practice. Someone put this in a fanfic STAT.

[she-karev]

A Day in Hell (Amber Karev Angst)

Age Rating: 12+

Chapters: Six of Six

Fandom: Grey’s Anatomy

Canon Episode: Season 17 Episode 2

AN: I wanted to do a story to showcase the hardships health care workers faced when covid hit. The doctors and nurses put our health first during a worldwide crisis and we should be forever grateful for that even without a pandemic to prove what should always be known.

Summary: Amber gets ready for the day the morning after Ian’s death.

Words: 738

Chapter Links Here: 1,2,3,4,5,6

April 1st, 2020

Amber stands in her bedroom putting her scrubs on getting ready for her next shift. She puts her dark brown hair up in a ponytail trying to keep her head held high after yesterday. Ian’s death is still fresh as she barely slept last night instead looking at the dog tags he left her that were his daughters.

Once she ties her shoes on, Amber looks at the dog tags on her bedside table with thought. While it felt wrong when Ian gave those to her at first, she knows he did it to give her comfort, to entrust her to carry his legacy with her. Amber notes that in the room last night was a father without a daughter and a daughter without a father. It was a cruel irony of sorts but not one Amber will take lightly.

She picks up the tags that are lined with black rubber and sees the engraving. TALBERT, OLIVIA. 947-22-0745. B POS. CHRISTIAN. She runs her fingers over the text wondering if the rightful owner would want her to have it like her father did. Amber inhales before deciding such questions should be left for a priest.

The young resident puts the chain over her neck and adjusts the tags over her scrubs so the information could be hidden. Satisfied with the results she exits her bedroom and goes downstairs to find Jackson in his kitchen making a protein shake. He looks up at Amber with a somber look.

“Hey kid, how are you holding up?”

“I’m managing, what about you?”

Jackson sighs, “That kid last night…he was just a kid, he was 18 but he was someone’s kid and now he’s not. And I think this probably wouldn’t be happening if that kid and his friends didn’t have the end of their senior year stalled by a virus. I’m feeling pretty crappy if you ask me.”

“I get that.” Amber plays with the tags around her neck which Jackson notices.

“Where did you get that?”

“Ian Talbert gave it to me before he died, it was his daughters who died in Afghanistan.” Jackson looks saddened by that as a father who also lost his child, “He didn’t have anyone to give it to but still I don’t know why he gave this to a complete stranger who couldn’t keep him alive.”

“Maybe that’s why he gave it to you.” Amber looks up confused and Jackson explains, “You’re trying your hardest to save every stranger you can, not giving a damn what happens to you when you put your own life at risk. It’s exactly what his daughter did when she enlisted, and he saw that in you.”

Amber’s face softens at that theory, “Maybe he wanted his daughter’s last possession to be in the hands of another soldier. And I think he saw that in you last night when you refused to leave his bedside.” Amber sighs at that holding the tags as a lifeline, “You couldn’t save him but that doesn’t mean you can’t stop fighting this damn thing in his name, in his daughter’s name. All we can do right now is fight until we can’t and then get back up and fight again. It’s part of the job Dr. Karev.”

Amber nods and inhales before looking back at Jackson with some light back in her eyes, “Okay Dr. Avery. I’ll keep fighting.”

“It wouldn’t be you if you didn’t.” Amber grins flattered by her friend’s sentiment as he pours his protein smoothie into a cup, “I have the day off today, I’ll be here when you get home. Good luck.”

“Thanks.” Amber grabs her mask and puts it on before walking down the hall to the elevator that opens. Once again Amber is face to face with the Karen from yesterday who has her mask in her hands and the same condescending grin targeted at the young doctor who has her fighting spirit awakened for the new day.

Karen speaks still in the elevator, “Could you please-”

Amber interrupts her with venom in her tone, “Wear your fucking mask lady we’re in the middle of a pandemic.”

She ignores the Karen’s shocked face and enters the elevator clearly making the blonde woman uncomfortable. Still, she was intimidated by the doctor’s presence and puts her mask on while Amber presses a button. She stays silent as does the lady and the elevator doors close.

[12pt-times-new-roman]

c3e52

DDB watch: No sponsor!

We begin with Chetney, Imogen, Fearne, and FCG in the Crystalsands Tundra. They can see the leylines and the auroras, but neither moon.

Sending from Imogen to Laudna: "Where are you? Are you still there? What happened? I don't know where we are, it's snowing. Please tell me you're okay." Laura rolls a 98 on a d100, spends the spell, takes psychic damage, and the message doesn't go through.

Sending from FCG to Orym: "Orym. We're in some sort of an icy tundra. Where are you? Are you okay? Are you seeing this shit?" Sam rolls a 51 on a d100. No damage, but the spell fails.

Both of them hear loud static and feel the spell unravel. Other magic works, though.

Oh, Chetney is flustered. That's what this is. He's disarmed. Not afraid, I don't think, but... something like it.

Another sending from Imogen to Laudna: "Where are you? Are you alright? We're in Uthodurn, I guess—" Laura rolls an 11 on a d100. No damage, but the spell is scattered and lost.

Sending to Dorian from FCG: "Dorian? A cataclysmic event has happened, and we are—" Sam rolls a 3. They figure out that sending will never work — the d100 is just to determine how much damage the caster takes.

Which is interesting. Because sending is unique — it's magic that gets drawn to the caster and then sent back along the leylines to the receiver. Other magic is just drawn from the leylines, it never has to travel back through them, so it should work.

The party finds a little cave to hide in on the side of a mountain.

Combat! Already! Woah!

Sounds like it's one of those ice lizards that the Mighty Nein fought in Aeor. And it deals 42 points of cold damage

"It's about this time, Chetney, that you see more movement. Two shapes, running from the mouth of the cavern, joining up behind this creature... these are smaller, though."

AABRIA!!! CHRISTIAN!!! (aka bi panic)

Christian is playing F.R.I.D.A., a rosegold-plated Aeormaton with a green cloak. They're feminine in appearance, muscular, and use they/them pronouns. They're a gunslinger fighter with a blunderbuss for an arm. They also have a level or two in both rogue and cleric.

Aabria is playing Deanna, a gnomish light-domain cleric in heavy plate armor, with a massive symbol of Pelor on her belt, wrapped in a colorful sweater and wearing Uggs. She's one of the people Chetney saw in the flashback Imogen gave him — she's Chetney's ex.

A day or so ago, Deanna "felt less of [the Dawnfather], like he was... leaning away."

Frida casts cure wounds on FCG. They're also a cleric multiclass, and have a symbol of the Dawnfather etched into their arm.

this is gonna be a biiiiig lore dump so

On Deanna: She and Chetney were a fling years and years ago. Chetney was the one who broke it off and left. Shortly after, Deanna was attacked and killed at a festival in the Greying Wildlands; her husband became an adventurer, and he found a cleric of the Dawnfather who resurrected her almost 200 years later. She was in the afterlife, "wherever you go next," with the gods — she was happy. And then she was back on Exandria. "Life is like being a snowflake, and when you die, you land in the ocean. For a while, you're a snowflake on the ocean, but eventually, you become that ocean. It's hard to come back from that." (Frida adds a note— "you shouldn't come back from that.")

On Frida: 2 years ago, they woke up in the Greying Wildlands, and made it to Uthodurn. Lost, alone, confused. They spent time watching, learning, and then heard Deanna's laugh. They realized that their primary function was probably to record, they have recordings of the laugh of every person they've ever met — Deanna's was familiar. They remembered that their function was to protect, and so they protect her, because she feels like home. Like Deanna, Frida was gone, asleep, for a long time, and then they were woken up by D. Wherever they were while they were asleep, they were happy — or, at least, there was the absence of sadness. They were ripped from that to serve something else, and "that was selfish. It seems like the gods like to play games with our lives." They're grateful that the Dawnfather brought Deanna to them, and so they multiclassed into cleric.

F.R.I.D.A. stands for "Far-Ranging Integrated Defense Aeormaton," which is inscribed on the inside of their faceplate. They know someone who knows a lot about Aeorian history — Jackabee Morcel. They live in Uthodurn.

With an insight check, Frida can't tell whether Deanna wants to kill or fuck Chetney, but can tell that she's freaking the fuck out.

"You take care of each other. You love each other. Is that not purpose enough?" y'all someone is finally calling FCG on their mentality.

"Do you know how we... power down? I think the gods are kind of like Aeormatons. We charge them. And I have this innate feeling, I suppose, that, after millennia, they want to sleep."

Catha is high in the sky, but neither Imogen nor Frida (who rolled a 26 perception) can see Ruidus.

Imogen notices that the markings on her arms have grown, they're nearly halfway up her upper arm, and the purplish coloration at the tips of her fingers has started to turn red.

To be fair, Frida has an excellent point, and I will add onto it by saying that the gods are not going to just lie down and die. They were able to seal Predathos away once, but we don't know how long that took. That fight could have taken decades, centuries. So even if Predathos is free, and even if it will eventually destroy Exandria if left unchecked, we — and the Bells Hells — don't know how long it will take. They could have all the time in the world, or no time at all. We have no way of knowing.

awwwww Deanna sneakily casts death ward on Chetney while he's sleeping.

Sending from Deanna to Orym: there are no words. Deanna remembers when she was the ocean, the interconnectedness, the odd absence of self, and reaches out toward the people who have loved Orym, who have known him, to reach toward him and knock on a door. She is met with static, and the spell fails.

oh my god Aabria has dice in her own handwriting?? that's so fucking cool. if anyone knows where she got those please DM me lmao

Imogen takes off the circlet and tries to extend her mind. The surface thoughts of her companions fill her mind, but below it all, there's this simmering blanket of static.

Frida having 9 charisma is the most unbelievable thing in this episode so far

Recording people's laughter is something that Frida does unconsciously, autonomously. Replaying it is a conscious decision, but recording it is an instinct. They believe that laughter is insight to the soul.

Frida has the same dream, over and over. It expands each time they experience it, just a little, but the more they dream, the more "whole" the picture becomes.

Deanna's children were young when she died. Her husband left their children with his sister when that happened to go adventuring, and eventually, her children left Uthodurn. By the time Deanna was resurrected, they had families of their own. Even though she wasn't in Uthodurn for very long, it feels like home to her, and she keeps coming back to it.

Chetney and Oltgar were good partners, made a lot of good things. But someone else came into the equation, Chetney stabbed them in the knee, the Glassblades chased him out of Uthodurn, he hid in the Savalirwood, and we know (most of) the rest.

"Not to make it weird, but.. you're kind of the first thing from my life before that doesn't hurt to see."

Chetney fails a random-ass wisdom saving throw, and he feels Catha rise, and with it the wolf. So he runs out into the night to transform instead of sticking around in the cave.

this just in: lightning titties and applebee solstice

"Forgive me, does he... grow? When he...?" "Yes." "All over." "That wasn't necessary." "I just smirk in monsterfucker." aabria.

When all that energy was syphoning out of the Ruidusborn, it "felt for a moment like you were connected to something that had been missing your entire life. It felt... fateful. Not good, but like the satisfaction when something fits just where it's supposed to, when you're organizing and something fits perfectly."

"Our relationship to the gods, it's not that of a parent and a child. We are not their children. We are their batteries... and the Matron just guides us to a place that existed before her and that will exist after her." The afterlife and the gods are more removed from each other than most people think; the afterlife existed before the gods, and it will exist after them.

Frida believes that the gods want to rest after thousands, thousands of years of being awake because of the faith of their creations. And maybe they're right. But what Ludinus wants for the gods is not sleep, it's destruction.

"I thought [the Dawnfather] was just leaning away... but maybe what I felt was fear. Dread. I didn't know they could feel that."

For the second night in a row, they can't see Ruidus in the sky, and Frida and Deanna — who use Ruidus to navigate — find that very strange. The leylines are still very much active, though.

Imogen goes into a dream with FCG and Fearne, focusing on Laudna.

Her consciousness is carried, pulled, torn through the leylines, dragged across Exandria at an immense speed, until everything goes red. They arrive at the singular nexus of all magic in Exandria, the column of red energy that still pierces upward into the locked, unmoving moon of Ruidus.

With a perception check, she notices that while there is energy being thrown upward, there is also energy being pulled down. She also sees a weave of golden thread that is beginning to separate, to break apart, and there is a red storm beginning to cycle in the middle of the Hellcatch. Imogen swears she can see a hundred or so people down there — not people, not how she knows them. Red-skinned. Railora. With a failed save, Fearne is thrown out of the dream.

Imogen is being pulled towards it, she feels like she's being pulled apart, a voice in the back of her head says to let go and give in to the pull towards Ruidus. With a successful wisdom check, FCG becomes an anchor, and holds Imogen in place.

Fearne shouts and slaps her, and with a 19 WIS save (which, might I add, barely succeeded), Imogen and FCG are pulled out of the dream.

y'all what the FUCK. Ruidus is tethered directly to the Malleus Key, so it's now spinning at the same speed as Exandria rather than Exandria rotating underneath it. is it gonna slam into Catha? is it affected at all from now moving at 1000mph?

Back to Frida, who's tracking Chetney. They use recordings of Fearne's voice to lure Chetney out, then a repeating recording of Deanna saying "you're the first thing from my past life that didn't hurt to see." Chetney finds Frida and isn't pouncing yet.

They kneel, hold their hand out, and echo Deanna's words. "I know you're in there, Pock o'pea. My friend needs you now. Please come back."

Deanna's scent isn't there, but neither is the scent of blood. Chetney gets to their hand, rears up, looks into their eyes and tries to resist the bloodlust. With a shit persuasion roll from Frida, we roll initiative.

Robot! Versus! Werewolf!

Frida shoots into the air, which Deanna knows is a signal, and takes off running back toward the camp.

They play Deanna's laughter again which gives Chetney another saving throw to break away from the frenzy. The quarry is wrong, the blood tastes wrong, the hunt is wrong, and the laughter is familiar. "You did this. You did this. You hurt a friend. You lost control. Other friends are coming. Shame hits you, deep shame." He takes off into the woods, and Imogen and Fearne follow while Deanna tends to Frida. Chetney escapes and runs into the woods.

Frida (presumably, with a 10) fails a CON save against lycanthropy, since Chetney bit them.

"He's in there—" "No, no—" "No, it's fine, it's fine, he's in there!" "Fine, I'll get him out the old fashioned way!" "...are you gonna fuck him?" never change, Laura Bailey. never change.

[erigold13261]

Your takes feel like you are trying to fill up a “diversity checklist” that only exists in your mind.

I just really like other cultures a lot. Plus most of the media I consume has diversity in it already so I am just working with what I got.

I mainly talk about NSR so I'll use that as an example. NSR is made by people in Malaysia with a lot of their culture coming through in the game. Because of this I see Vinyl City as taking place in Malaysia, so already I feel like a lot of my headcanons should express that.

Then you have the characters in the game that (to me) feel like they are already really diverse (like Eve having a lot of Indian inspiration, Sayu having east Asian inspirations, mainly Japanese I think, 1010 having Kpop inspo, and Tatiana is a name that originates from Russia). I use these kinds hints at a character to think of headcanons about where they might be from or the world around them.

Plus, pretty sure Tatiana at some point said her artists are from all around the world, which is why I think NSR is very diverse. I don't really have any excuse for Yinu being Mexican or DJSS being African other than I saw som other peoples headcanons for them at some point in time.

This kind of thinking also helps give me motivation to look up other cultures more so than I would have just by myself. It also goes the same for religion. I've researched a lot more about religion (outside of Christianity which I was brought up with, though I still do research on that since I don't know everything about it) than I ever really would on my own. Usually I would just google a question I came up with and be done, but now I am trying to actually learn more about the history of holidays and religions.

If you're talking about the queer aspect of my takes/art, that's literally just because I am queer as well and like seeing other characters as queer. Plus, a lot of the time, if you have a queer person, they are most likely going to hang out with other queer people. I find the "one queer friend in a group" trope to be unrealistic to me, so if I make queer headcanons it does affect other headcanons (things like 1010 being queer also takes into account their robot nature and how they could never truly be cishet anyway even if they identify as cishet, it gets into a grey area I love to explore).

Mainly, what I am saying, is that I like to base my headcanons in a kind of reality. Like it is realistic that places like Vinyl City (music capital of the world), Nueva York (meeting hub for all people in the spider society across dimensions), Vandelay Technologies (international tech company helping others), and official Psychonaut location (a world organization helping psychics, who can be seen as queer coded) are places where a lot of diversity happens. Race, religious, and queer diversity would happen a lot more in these places than in like a small town in the midwest of the US.

Plus, like I said, a lot of these media I am consuming/talking about already have diversity to them. If I started just placing Vinyl City in America and stripping it of it's culture it already has, then I don't feel like that would be doing the game justice. And that goes for things like Psychonauts, Spiderverse, and Hi Fi Rush. They show (or at the very least imply) diversity in their media, and I just take that and run with it.

I don't have an actual checklist in my mind. I literally just say random headcanons that pop up or I play off of other people's headcanons. But even if I did, I don't really see a problem with that if I am not being disrespectful to the cultures I am talking about/trying to show in my art. I don't see diversity as a problem, especially in the setting of the media I talk about which brings people from all around the world into fairly small areas. Like the cities are big, but they are obviously smaller than the whole world, which is why there seems to be a concentration of diversity when I talk about characters, because they are literally from all walks of life with their own experiences brought on by their own cultures that they bring with them to their new lives, which in turn shapes the area they are living in and portraying to the audience.

I don't really know what to tell you. I like talking and learning about other cultures and I don't see that as a problem if I do it respectfully. People are diverse and I'm gonna keep trying to show that in how I talk/portray things.

[locustheologicus]

The Grey Jedi and Jesuit Spirituality

There must be both dark and light. I will do what I must to keep the balance, as the balance is what holds all life. There is no good without evil, but evil must not be allowed to flourish. There is passion, yet peace; serenity, yet emotion; chaos, yet order. I am a wielder of the flame; a champion of balance. I am a guardian of life. I am a Gray Jedi.

This quote comes from Leor Danal who is considered a founding member of the grey jedi, a spiritually community of the force that seeks balance in all things. I am intrigued at how this aspect of the Star Wars universe resembles Jesuit spirituality. Here is the code of the grey jedi.

Flowing through all, there is balance There is no peace without a passion to create, There is no passion without peace to guide, Knowledge fades without the strength to act, Power blinds without the serenity to see. There is freedom in life. There is purpose in death The Force is all things and I am the Force

Now, consider the first principle and foundation of Jesuit spirituality.

In everyday life, then, we must hold ourselves in balance before all created gifts insofar as we have a choice and are not bound by some responsibility. We should not fix our desire on health or sickness, wealth or poverty, success or failure, a long life or a short one. For everything has the potential of calling forth in us a more loving response to our life forever with God.

Our only desire and our one choice should be this: I want and I choose what better leads to God's deepening life in me.

The spirituality of balance calls us to let go and be detached from the material goods of this world. The spirituality of letting go is what we call kenosis, a spirituality that follows the example of Christ in letting go his divinity in order to redeem humanity (Philippians 2:6-8). Both St. Ignatius and Leor Danal call us to be oriented to the source of all being. We Christians call this source God and the Jedi identify that as the Force. Detachment allows us to enjoy the goods of this world while not allowing ourselves to be mastered by any one person or thing.

It is curious that serenity is identified by the Gray Jedi as a source for achieving balance. The serenity prayer is recognized as a prayer for wisdom to help us achieve the grace to be emotionally detached and focused on the source of all being.

At this point it may be asked, why would the Grey Jedi have this tradition and not the Jedi order itself? If the mission of both the Jedi and the Christian Church is to promote the good, to strive for justice and peace based on the good, is this not better than seeking detachment and balance. The simple answer is that good itself can be subjective. This is especially true of any institution that serves a political order, like the historical Church and the Jedi order. Chancellor Palpatine was able to corrupt Anakin with the self-serving political interest of the Jedi Order in preserving its vision for the Galactic Republic. In "Tales of the Jedi" episode 2 and 3, we see how Jedi Master Dooku saw the injustice that came from corrupt Republic dignitaries. This caused him to question the ways of the Republic and the Jedi and enter the way of the Sith.

But the Jesuit influenced spirituality of the Grey Jedi offers the path of balance and focus. While recognizing the truth of this world they strive to always serve the highest good and address the errors of even well-intentioned institutions that suffer from forms of corruption. In our own history we see that this happened when the Jesuits evangelized and defended the Guarani tribes of modern-day Paraguay from colonial oppression backed by the Church. This would eventually lead to the temporary suppression of the Jesuits who thankfully were brought back after the Church recognized their noble position. In the movie "The Mission," we see two Jesuits, played by Robert DeNiro and Jeremy Irons, who struggle with the correct way to respond to this oppressive reality. DeNiro's character, like Count Dooku, chooses the path of fighting the colonials in defense of this indigenous community, which does not end well.

As the Star Wars universe develops its Jedi tradition, I wonder if these spiritual teachings can become opportunities to engage with aspects of our Christian spirituality and its mendicant tradition.

[icelogged]

see the taglist project [live reconstruction]

long obnoxious tags with deeply personal meanings my beloved! I add on as i go!

[last updated 2023/05/12 AD]

#evidence of life - original posts

#cold #warm  - vibe tags

blog/main project tags: #they say there's something in our seas / we should all be careful / i'm not swimming anyway / i'm too busy moping #thesis

organizational tags that group specific motifs

#and if that means changing shape if that means putting together the unexpected that is any monster's ancient right - monster grrl trans wrath

#behind you - darkness

#christ haunted - Christianity related

#crime scene - not real crimes scenes just settings for writing or art

#deer in headlights - deers, stags etc

#doll bones - dolls, dollkin

#flower girls play lover grave games in the courtyard - wlw coven monster packs

#fortress of cold stone - vamp castle vibe

#found face down on the ground - body dumping grounds

#freezer bride - freezer bride aestheticisms

#gallons of the stuff - BLOOD

#he promised to kill what he loved - a bad man

#holy backrooms - backrooms liminal spaces

#i'm left in the fumes of a guilty machine - SA related

#if you have the stomach for it - romance tag uno

#i wanted it to be home - my house in nebraska is a cottage in *grey hound bus passes*

#left blood on the oil painting - reds

#lightning hit my wings - fallen angel, angelcore

#like a fist like a knife - romance tag dos

#mermaid blood - mermaid aestheticisms, fresh and sea water

#smile you're on camera - found footage vibes

#tied to a tree and fed strawberries - weird forest date

#waterlogged - waterlogged corpse vibes

#winter fairy - winter, snow, winter coquette

media

#art #moodboard #web weaving 

#horror

#[haunted] cabin fever - the shining

#a tragedy in three parts: daughter wife and mother - the story of a preacher’s daughter wife and mother as told by Ethel Cain

#by a cord of sticky flesh - dead ringers

#canadian coming of age documentary - ginger snaps

#cannibal apologist - Hannibal NBC

#girls will say i know a place and take you to silent hill - silent hill

#inherited divine suffering - hereditary

#la casa awoo - la casa lobo

#lollipop chainsaw massacre- TCM

#maddened by the breath of god - Possession (1981)

#my auntie buffalo bill - the silence of the lambs, Hannibal (2001)

#shakespearean tragedies for magical girls - 魔法少女まどか☆マギカ

#tests to gauge one’s will to survive through physical or psychological torture for rehabilitation to some and valentine’s gift to others - saw franchise

#vroom vroom (1996) - crash

#wouldst thou like to live deliciously - the VVitch (2015)

#music #music box - audio files

#chelsea wolfe #deftones #ethel cain #nicole dollanganger

personal 

#face reveal - about me /silly (actual pictures of me are in evidence of life plus my icon and header if you’re curious)

#gender class study material - my attempts at gender absorption #gender: broadcast - how I’m tryna be 🏳️‍⚧️🤍🥩

#make it go away - this blog’s comfort tag

#memory fuel - photos that break through dissociative fog

#my meals - self explanatory yay edrecovery

#wardrobe - stuff I’d wear, fashion, looks

#wrapped in ribbon - favourite posts

lovermaker.exe / ocs with left beef

#huckleberry

places

#eternal rest - cemeteries, graves

#manitoba #ontario #saskatchewan

Entities [leads to their tumblr unless stated otherwise because you should check them out]

#camojacketfag #churchrummagesale #deejayphoto #hayden anhedonia #isabelle adjani [leads to tag] #michael donovan #plastiboo #shelley duvall [leads to tag] #tearsandtheteeth #user ojibwa

tags so people i want to show stuff don’t have to dig through their @s

#march #my twin God made our two bodies two minds one soul and yeah it was good

etc #collection - trinkets and things lotsa knives :3 #friends - animals #BATS !!! - self explanatory #message in a bottle - asks #visual stim - self explanatory #words - self explanatory

backlist / warning

#ed tw ed tw in tags - not a ed blog im just a girl with an ed that runs a blog and sometimes complains about it

#horror - this a horror blog and content that could be unsettling content can be untagged! the horror tag mostly covers horror media specifically! if you’d follow but this is a problem i suggest stopping by my main instead :3

#mdni - minors don’t interact

#nsft - i doubt this tag will be will be used. for example this text post would not be tagged [silly and not graphic but alludes to sexuality] nor would this painting [“artistic” nudity] i don’t plan on posting anything that would warrant that tag but it’s what I would use in the event that I do

#sfx gore - self explanatory real life cuts, bruises, injuries, medical, violent text posts will be untagged unless someone requests something specifically tagged. remember blood has a tag. there will be no promotion of self harm or irl/non-SFX gore imagery.

[leviathan-supersystem]

some posts from @objectivistnerd from shortly after their pivot from right-libertarian non-voter to globe emoji neoliberal democrat that add some interesting context:

from this we can see that they A: want to push people they consider "toxic" out of the democratic party, and B: they consider joe biden to be too "woke" on issues like trans rights and systemic racism.

so like, that gets at the contradiction at play here. this person wants to kick everyone who has left-wing economic or progressive social views out of the party, but then acts surprised when those people- who they actively tried to push out!- won't vote for the party. and if this guilt-tripping vote-shaming actually worked, and progressives actually started voting for democrats, this person wouldn't want to vote for democrats anymore, because for this person hating leftists and progressives and doing the opposite of whatever they're doing is a major fulcrum of this person's politics. (but not the *central* one- but I'll come back to that later). when the easiest route to harranging progressives and leftists was scolding them for voting for warmongering democrats, they did that, and now that the easiest route is scolding them for *not* voting for democrats, they do that. no matter what progressives are doing, this person will find a way to attack them.

(also, look at the hypocrisy of telling people to vote for democrats due to them supposedly being better on israel/palestine, while actively trying to expell the few candidates who are *actually* better on israel/palestine out of the party)

I mean, look at this post from their pre-pivot era:

this person is so gripped by anti-communist paranoia that when "christian-glibertarian" talks about fighting nazis, they're worried it's a plot to get them to support communism.

which puts their pro-azov stance into context. when they saw marxists and libertarians unified on an anti-war stance on ukraine, their knee-jerk anti-communism caused them to immediately flee their former right-libertarian peers, revealing all their previous anti-war posturing to be a fraud.

what really terrifies this person is the idea that if the more populist working-class right-libertarians started actually talking to Marxists, they might realize not only that they shouldn't fear Marxists, but that Marxism can actually address the problem of ruling-class domination of the working class in a way right-libertarianism never could.

this person is, for example, a die-hard shill for wealthy ruling-class people like bill gates- this used to be framed in terms of anti-communism, now it's framed in terms of criticizing right-wing conspiracy theorism, but the bill gates shilling has stayed consistent.

when dealing with right-wingers, it's important to distinguish between populist working-class people who have been deceived into thinking right-wing economics will serve their interests, and the overt lackeys of the ruling class who are doing the deceiving. the latter will try to use shallow aesthetic signifiers to convince you that you have more in common with them than the former, that you should focus on finding common ground with or trying to win over bougie right-wing techies and not trying to win over working-class populists, but that's a lie. this is what the whole dumbass "red tribe/blue tribe/grey tribe" framework is about, and wouldn't you know it, @objectivistnerd is a lesswronger.

("usonian hegemonist" fucking gross)

but these people think jim-crow joe biden is too "woke" on racial issues, the idea that you have more in common with the "capitalism is great because of heroes like bill gates" than the "bill gates is going to give us the mark of the beast" crowd on some kind of supposed common ground on social issues is ludicrous. populist right-wingers can actually be won over, including on social issues, but these sorts of ruling-class shills are a scorpion on your back, waiting to sink the stinger in.

no matter how much people like this tried to push their pro-bill gates poison on populist right-wingers, even the most indoctrinated right-winger can't help but see the problem bill gates represents, even if this awareness bubbles up filtered through a right-wing religious framing. sooner or later these people will realize that there's only one solution to the problem of bill gates hoarding farm land, and it's not the "non aggression principle"- it's seizing and redistributing the farmland.

this person has attacked me in the past, and, in keeping with the larger pattern of their behavior, they attacked me in order to defend jeff bezos' plan to [checks notes] exile the majority of the human population to outer space to turn earth into a nature preserve and a playground for rich people.

notice the strawmanning by them and their buddy of me being against "attempting space travel" rather than, you know, "forcibly deporting people from earth"- this kind of strawmanning is typical in the lesswronger playbook.

I'm sure many people have already shared this here, but I think it's important that people here on Tumblr need to see this.

"I disagree with Kamala's position on the war in Gaza. How can I vote for her?" by US Senator Bernie Sanders

[ree-duh]

Hey sorry if you don't mind, I just Saw tour post about starting dragon age inquisition and i thought to send a message because i also started at that game and my first playthrough i was sooo confused about every thing. Because apparently they retcon a bunch of lore to make it look like a more morally grey conflict along others quests.

Só if you don't mind, Dragon age develops this idea of what if Magic was real in the fearful christian society of medieval europe, and Jesus was Joanna d'Arc (called Andraste) Some countries have its paralels like fereldan is the British isles and orlais is france!

Except this world hás Magic that is sourced by the Veil, a sort of paralel world of Dreams where spirits and demons live, and your mind goes when you sleep, those demons prey on mages because they are more powerful and can control the fade to their will , and if a Mage gets possessed its called an abomination

Só on this world, Magic would be deemed too dangerous by the church, só the Chantry (its equivalente) creates the Templars, warriors that train in magic resistance to be able to hunt, lock and control mages up in towers called the Circles. Mages that existe outside the circle are called apostates

You can't leave the circle never and if mages don't pass a test, called the harrowing, they lobotomize them to cut their ties to the Fade, those are called Tranquil. Also Templars get their powers by consuming lyrium, a glowy blue rock that is Pure Magic, it can get them Addicted

And on the events of past games the tension between mages and Templars created a rebellion, Templars kept a tight leash on mages and they started to fight back, by resorting to demons and blood Magic( a source of Magic that is as powerful as lyrium) to fight back

They will mention a Blight, wich is like corrupted monsters that poison everything, and the only group that works to defeat them(they are properly immunized) are the Grey Wardens, the Blight poisons the land, people and lyrium, wich starts glowing red and is even more dangerous.

I think I got the general vibe, but i think the best way is to just play the game and enjoy, you don't need to know the lore to have fun, the Gameplay is neat and the companions are fantastic, sorry for the mile long rant but i wished someone shed some light into things ahah, hope you enjoy!!

Oh…. My god? And Cassandra and Cullen are templars?? I’m literally playing a mage get them out of here 😭😭

ngl because I didn’t really know what their conflict was and I only vaguely remembered that mages (??) did that shit with fenris and from what I saw (??) enslaved elves?? So I assumed the mages as like a group werent great 😭😭

[primroseprime2019]

Beneath the Waves

⚓︎Chapter Three⚓︎

▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔▔

Paige swam up to the surface before she leapt out of the water and into the air. She smiled as she felt a swift breeze in her hair.

She dived back into the water. She grinned at her friends.

"That was awesome!" Zaveon exclaimed with a grin. "Do it again! Do it again!" Jairo chirped excitedly.

Paige chuckled and she looked at the surface again. She started to swim again only to yelp when Draven grabbed her tail fins.

She glared at him and whacked him on the head, making him yelp.

"Rude!" She huffed. He rubbed his head, even though it didn't really hurt as one would think.

"Isn't this a little dangerous?" He asked, frowning, "no merfolk who's ever done this has never come back." "You don't know that," Christian huffed.

Draven glared at him, "I don't need to know that. I just know rumors like that are true."

Luna looked back at the surface and frowned. While she was younger, she had seen merfolk go up to the surface and she had seen few return.

A shiver ran up her spine and she rubbed the back of her neck. "Maybe... Draven's right," she said, "Elowen's story about the Leviathans may be true too."

Bailey and Justin looked at each other. Paige bit her lip and she looked at the surface.

'Just another peek shouldn't hurt... right?' She thought before she started swimming to the surface.

"Wha- Paige!" Jason yelped, his eyes widening. The others quickly looked at her and their eyes widened too. The mermaid swam closer and closer before she breached the surface. She looked around before she spotted a nearby town.

She tilted her head and squinted her eyes. She saw a town that nestled on the age of the sea. She tilted her head curiously. Bonnie's head popped up beside her.

"It looks nice," she squeaked nervously. Paige looked at her then at the town.

"Yeah... it does," she agreed quietly.

On the beach, an eighteen year old boy sat by the shore, drawing shapes in the sand. He had limestone skin, dark brownish-black hair and deep brown eyes.

He wore a yellow and black short-sleeved shirt and light gray shorts that were slightly torn at the knee part. He sighed softly and closed his eyes.

"Hey, Chauncey!"

He looked over to see his brothers, Caspian, Caleb, Clark and Coby.

Caspian was nineteen years old. He had porcelain skin, raven black hair and light grey eyes. He wore a white and black shirt and brown jeans.

Caleb was seventeen years old. He had porcelain skin, blonde hair and deep blue eyes. He was wearing a brown shirt and white shorts. Clark was also seventeen years old. He had pale ivory skin, light brown hair and sea green eyes. He wore a red-orange long-sleeved shirt and dark blue shorts.

And Coby was sixteen years old. He had porcelain skin, dark blue hair and dark blue eyes. He wore a yellow and blue long-sleeved shirt with a single black star on the middle. He wore dusty brown pants.

"Aren't you gonna come play with us?" Caspian asked with a smile.

Chauncey chuckled, "maybe later, Cas." "Oh boo!" Clark pouted as he huffed, "c'mon Chauncey! Live a little!"

"For your information, I do live a little, Clark," Chauncey chuckled, "our parents are the most famous bakers in this town."

"You mean the boring town we are living in?" Clark asked and Caspian gently poked his brother's cheek.

"Ignore him," Caleb chuckled, "but the Willow family never sticks in one place." "Not this time," Coby piped up and Chauncey chuckled.

He looked back at the sea and tilted his head curiously. Ever since he and his family moved to the town of Windshore, there wasn't much to see or do. Nestled along the rolling coastline, Windshore was a picturesque haven that captured the essence of coastal life.

It boasted a charming blend of old-world charm and vibrant seaside energy. The town's architecture showcased a delightful mix of weather-worn cottages and elegant Victorian-inspired buildings, their vibrant pastel hues standing out against the azure of the sky and sea. Delicate climbing roses and vibrant bougainvillea cascaded along the town's walls and fences, painting a tapestry of color that perfectly completed the natural beauty surrounding Windshore.

Chauncey had grown to like the sea by the town even though his mother would try and stop him and Coby from sneaking out to play in the water.

Ever since he was younger, he had always enjoyed the ocean. His dad would take him and Caspian to see it up close and he couldn't have been happier.

"Daddy! Look! I found a seashell!" An eleven year old Chauncey squealed happily as he held a bright blue conch shell in his hand.

"Awesome!" A twelve Caspian exclaimed. Their dad, Christopher Willow, chuckled. He knelt down next to Chauncey.

"I'd say a mermaid sent you that, Chauncey," he said. Chauncey looked up at him curiously, "a mermaid?"

Christopher nodded, "mermaids and mermen are ancient people who live underwater." "And they've got fish tails!" A ten year old Caleb piped up with a giggle.

"How come they don't live here?" Chauncey asked curiously. Christopher hummed softly as he looked towards the sea and Chauncey saw the distant look in his eyes. It was strange but... it seemed like he was missing something.

"I guess you can say that... something keeps them in the sea, kiddo," Christopher said softly.

Chauncey sighed softly. The sun was starting to set.

"Let's head home," Caspian said, "Mom is probably making supper and it's gonna be nighttime soon." "Okaaay," Coby and Caleb whined.

Clark chuckled. Chauncey got up and he and his brothers walked back into the town.

The Willow brothers strolled through the cobblestone streets where there were myriads of quaint shops, each with its unique wares and inviting storefronts. From artisanal boutiques that displayed handcrafted jewelry and nautical-inspired treasures to cozy bookstores brimming with tales of sea adventures.

The murmuring seaside promenade acted as a lively gathering place and the heart of the community life in Windshore. With its charming arched bences and enchanting lampposts, it invited residents and travelers alike to pause and take in the breathtaking views of the shimmering sea. Fishermen often departed from its wooden dock, setting out to sea to capture the day's bounty, while children frolicked along the sandy beach, building intricate sandcastles adorned with seashells and seaweed.

In the heart of the town, the Willow Bakery stood as a beloved cornerstone of the town. The heavenly scent of fresh-baked bread and delectable pastries wafted through the streets, drawing locals and tourists alike to the bakery's warm embrace.

Chauncey could imagine customers entering with anticipation, their mouths watering at the sight of delicate cakes adorned with edible pearls and buttery croissants dusted with powdered sugar. The warm glow of the bakery's interior spilled onto the street.

The glass pane showcased an array of tantalizing treats, each meticulously crafted and displayed. From golden crusty loaves of bread to fluffy pastries dusted with sugar, the bakery's creations seemed like edible works of art.

Chauncey and his brothers walked through a mystical wooden door, its rich brown hue exuding a sense of rustic elegance. Above the door, a delicate sign swung gently in the breeze, depicting a graceful willow tree, its branches spilling across the bakery's name in elegant lettering.

"Mom! Dad! We're back!" Caleb called out. As the brothers entered the bakery, the scent of freshly baked goods spilled outward. Coby's stomach growled and Clark snickered.

The walls were adorned with shelves filled to the brim with jars of spices, colorful baking ingredients, and antique kitchen utensils. Soft light spilled from the enchanting chandeliers suspended from the high ceiling, casting a warm glow that enhanced the bakery's inviting ambiance.

The centerpiece of the Willow Bakery was a grand wooden counter, its polished surface meticulously maintained. Behind the counter, their dad, Christopher, clad in a crisp white apron moved with precision, his hands expertly shaping dough and artfully decorating cakes. The aroma of freshly brewed coffee mingled with the sweet fragrance of pastries, creating an irresistible sensory symphony.

Wide glass display cases exhibitd an assortment of treats, each one seemingly more tempting than the last. Delicate cupcakes adorned with edible flowers sat alongside flaky fruit galettes and intricately decorated celebration cakes. Rows of artisanal breads, their crusts golden and perfectly scored, lined the shelves, offering a tempting array of flavors and textures.

"Welcome home, boys," Christopher chuckled. He had limestone skin, dark blue hair and sea green eyes. He was forty-two years old.

Caspian walked over to help him.

A thirty-six year old woman came down the stairs. She had porcelain skin, raven black hair and light grey eyes.

She was their mother, Camille Willow.

"I hope you boys had your fun today," she chuckled, kissing Coby on the head and giving Clark and Caleb kisses on their cheeks, much to their chagrin.

"We did, Ma," Clark said with a soft chuckle. Camille chuckled, "good." She looked over at Chauncey who was gazing out the window.

She chuckled softly and walked over to him. "You're daydreaming again," she said, making him look at her. He smiled, "sorry, Mom."

"No need to apologize, little bumblebee," Camille chuckled. Chauncey smiled more at the nickname.

She had always called him that since he was a baby. At the age of four, he was in a patch of sunflowers and started making bumblebee sounds.

She even called Coby 'little supernova'.

"Hey, how come you never gave Clark, me or Caspian any nicknames?" Caleb asked with a pout.

"Because you're the prankster in the family," Caspian smirked. Coby laughed as Caleb made a noise of protest.

Camille rolled her eyes and shook her head with a chuckle.

Chauncey laughed softly and he looked out the window again. As much as he appreciated moments like these... he knew it also wouldn't hurt for things to change.

[kiss-my-freckle]

Reviewing an actor/actress performance. Not sure you like to, but you have in the past so I'll ask anyway.

So much hate and love, in equal measure, for Ian's performance in fandom. Like most ppl, he is the reason I rewatch and I am disappointed that his career didn't go further. But I am biased because I love (like a whole lot) the character of Damon.

I love Bonnie too. But I find it odd how so many people praise Kat's performance to an exhausting level. Kat absolutely grew from season 1-8 and it shows. This is where she got her "acting chops?" Perhaps. She was never ever bad but going up against some of the talent in the show, I just don't get it. I adore Bonnie the character, but it's impossible to pick up any further nuances then just delivering the script. The others seem to have many layers. True, her storylines were muted or curtailed (like I'm still really pissed we never saw more of Lucy) and this may be the reason. There's a lot of hate slinging around for Julie in this regard. I don't know, I didn't watch it when it was airing so I'm not sure what the drama was at the time only that they forced her to wear those horrible wigs.

Then there is Caroline. I cannot stand the character. But Candice's acting is wild. She never misses the mark. I mean she makes some of the bad writing in later seasons sound, reasonable? And in the early seasons, she makes me hate her. I think that was the point.

Thoughts?

Ian is a great actor. I didn't see him in anything until I watched TVD, but I wanted to see more after seeing him. That's why I chose to watch V Wars and why I often argue Fifty Shades of Grey. I feel Ian is too good of an actor to have done the films. Not because of the sex of it, but because of the writing. I'm not a fan of Fifty Shades because it's my opinion that the writing sucked. The writing didn't sell the books, the sex did... that's why I'm glad Ian didn't do the films. For me to want Ian playing Christian Grey, the films can't follow the books. Had TVD writers followed the books, I probably wouldn't like Damon, but I'd like Ian as an actor. Hating Katherine, Caroline, and Stefan as much as I do only speaks to how great the actors are. I hate them almost as much as I love Damon... which is actually a good thing. I'd probably love Candice in other roles. It's my opinion that some actors own every role they take, like Johnny Depp. And some actors only own one or two roles they take, like Matthew McConaughey. I didn't like Matthew as an actor until I watched True Detective. Sometimes it's the actor, sometimes it's the role and the writing, sometimes it's both. Had they put Ian in Kat's role, there wouldn't be many Damon fans because his acting would've been limited by the writing. Kat's problem isn't Kat. Her acting was limited by the writing. She'd need another role to get her acting chops because "Bonnie" didn't do it for her.