#i said way too much to her oh god | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

tenwhiteandalusians · 1 month ago

Text

and then no one said anything about the fact that if i watched ONE MORE episode tenax pulls a "i'm not angry i'm just disappointed i'm hurt" about scorpus signing with the white faction.

#do you see the vision here <- guy who has a watch rate of one episode per month #oh the implications of scorpus not being there for tenax in his time of need... the death of the child who is not but is symbolically their #is that a separate fic completely yes but it is ALSO in some ways a divorce fic. tenax like i needed you but scorpus also needing him #OH MY GOD THEY LITERALLY DO SAY FELIX WAS HIM and i can do SO much with the concept of a “stray”. oh please. please strays instead of rats #one knife to the ribs one fixed race one apartment board THAT'S A STORYLINE BABY RISE OR DIE THE ROMAN WAYYYYYY #i do see your calla/tenax storylines i do. i could be swayed but we are not here for that currently this is the same as the chariot racing #like i KNOW what i said about the gold faction representing everything that scares scorpus a dream he never thought they'd reach #and then to have it ripped away now he no longer even has the dream untarnished i do understand. which is why the “i'm disappointed”#kills me even MORE because it shows he gets it. like on some level he does understand why scorpus had to but it's his pride that's wounde #so to continue from what i WAS saying with:#sets the bar so low because how else would tenax love him (as if tenax would not do the same thing if he lost) and they have even MORE #questionable celebratory reward sex. yes i assigned scorpus a degradation/praise kink the world works in wondrous ways don't question it #scorpus/tenax #those about to die #tenax making sure to care for the kids is what's killing me too because i REALLY want to draw a parallel with scorpus making sure he takes #care of the prostitutes. yes he's a notorious hedonist yes he has a lot of sex but he always pays well doesn't he. over-well. he pays too #much and ends up in debt he pays enough to buy girls freedom. so that they only have to if they want to. it gets him a reputation sure AND #it gets whole houses of girls under his (and therefore tenax's) protection. you can't bruise her up; that's scorpus' favorite girl.#she can charge more for being favored. he can pay for massive parties where no one else is invited and if he falls asleep midway drunk #off his ass after a race the girls would never say. they still get paid. if tenax comes to watch and give instructions they'd never say.#if tenax tells them all to leave and it's just him and scorpus in the golden room and all the girls see before they shut the door #and latch it behind them is scorpus on his knees in the soft plush cushions with tenax offering him grapes one by one from his fingertips #like a favored concubine instead of the champion whose laurels are tilted on his head they won't say a word. not even when the noise #inside the room continues for long after the hour runs out the girls still stand watch until it's quiet and then crawl back in around where #scorpus is alone in the big wrecked bed with a smear of blood or wine on his mouth who could say. certainly they wouldn't.#no matter what they still get paid. whether they did the work to wreck him or not.#ANYWAY #they take care of the selves they couldn't protect is what i'm trying to say. for tenax it's the child he was/scorpus it's the body he sold #only he hasn't stopped having to sell it. & i guess as we're learning with the extortion tenax is still a child running from a burning hous

7 notes · View notes

winter-hoof · 1 month ago

Text

Simply not having a wonderful Christmas time. I was up all night last night because my dog got sick from a treat we gave her and was puking a bunch :(

#she seems to be doing fine today thank god. thought we were going to have to call the vet but she hasn't puked since 4:30am #and she's acting normal today & kept her food + water down. i 100% freak myself out & worry too much about everything #b/c i was like oh god what if she has a blockage i haven't seen her poop yet today even though my bf told me he saw her multiple times #so then i started googling about gi blockages in dogs & reading reddit posts of people whose dogs died or had surgery b/c of it #got myself WAY too worked up over it & was crying all night. then i went outside & watched her poop very normally at like 4am #so it's like ok clearly she's not blocked up & i'm just jumping to the worst case scenario like i tend to do about everything #DO NOT buy petsmart merry & bright treats. i'm so upset at myself for it. i was like oh haha treat shaped like a drumstick that's cute #but then reading reviews on their website so many of those treats have reviews from people saying they made their dogs sick #like oh cool i should have fucking read that before buying the treats i feel so stupid & bad like I KNOW BETTER wtf was i thinking #like i just would not be able to forgive myself if she had died from it or had to have a surgery to remove a blockage #but anyway thankfully she seems to be back to her normal self today although a little tired but not lethargic tired just regular tired #b/c we were up all night. she's back to herding the cats & barking at everything & all her usual goofy behaviors #actual thing i said last night: 'i lost my dad right before christmas i don't need to also lose my dog right before christmas'#p

3 notes · View notes

moe-broey · 2 months ago

Text

Idk if I'm gonna be able to articulate this on the fly like first thing in the morning, but. I think my ENTIRE body of work is This: Examining how family ties, bonds or lack thereof, the good and bad AND ugly, seep into every facet of who we are and how we come to interact with others. How sometimes, a family tie (or again, a Lack of one), will sometimes bleed into how you act and treat specific people. Will bleed into how you CONNECT with those people (or, will be the very reason you fail to do so).

HOWEVER. HOWEVER. THERE IS A DELICATE LINE. A BALANCING ACT. You CANNOT just simply attribute fanon flavored ideas of found family to such characters. That's too simple, and sometimes, is a complete disservice to the specific character you're working with. I am once again bringing up Chilchuck. YES, him being a dad Absolutely seeps into how he treats his party. But if you call him the party's dad, you're Insane. Do you know ANYTHING ABOUT THAT MAN???? He would prefer you didn't. But I digress. He strikes a fascinating balance, between having The Qualities and ESPECIALLY expressing his care for his party in a Really Specific divorced (separated.) father of three fashion, but that does Not make him a "dad friend". He's a professional. He's on business. He's going home at the end of the day, and at the end of this adventure he's thinking of setting up a shop. I wanted to keep this more vague and broad but like. The Chilchuck example REALLY DOES perfectly articulate What I'm trying to get at, here. He's the perfect encapsulation of How his family shapes him, how that bleeds into his relationships with others, vs Who he is as a person.

How we were raised, our family ties, whether you adhere to it or you've fallen FAR from the tree -- you still fell from that stupid fucking tree. It's in your blood. Literally. It gave you shape, whether you liked it or not. And sometimes some things just set off weird domino effects, that also affect us irrevocably forever.

WHICH IS. TO SAY. I have no fucking idea what I'm talking about. I'm always trying to figure that out. Found family is/can be real, you're not strictly bound by blood if you don't wanna be. BUT. The bullshit I'm constantly on, is trying to figure out how to balance all that without slotting everyone into reductive roles. I'm gay and I seek to destroy the nuclear family. Not attempt to recreate nuclear family 2.0. You CAN reconstruct What Family Is/Means from the ground up, but you have to accept that things are going to get Weird. Because you're Queer. You are fundamentally incompatible with the status quo and normalcy, the solution is NOT assimilation and palatability, the solution is to just. Get weirder. And be fluent in canon. Okay. I love you

#my notes #why am i becoming chilchuck's spokesperson. chilchuck defender.#well i can fucking tell you! it's because my dad is a divorced father of FIVE. with a drinking problem so bad #that if he didn't quit it would have killed him. and guess what! i can tell you a few things about alfonse.#the way alfonse strives to be just like gustav. idealizing him ect ect. and the way i just wanna grab him by the shoulders #and SHAKE HIM. SHAKE HIM. SHAKE HIM. snap him out of repeating the cycles by the power of friendship and gay sex #it SUCKS ASS TO SAY IT IN THE SAME BREATH. I HATE THIS AS MUCH AS YOU DO.#but if you (my own brother) are gonna end up Just Like Your Father could you at least go all the way. get divorced. for the love of god #get divorced. oh my god okay oversharing hour but the WAY. THE WAY. dad once told me #[my brother's now ex wife far as i know thank god it finally happened bu my god it took WAY too long]#but the way my dad told me once [my brother's ex wife] reminded him a bit of his second wife.#oh my god i didn't even tell you the famous dad lore. he's been divorced three times. he is THE EPIC DIVORCE MAN.#like when i look at chilchuck i go. i know this man personally. i live with him.#alfonse's case is. really. really way more complicated. like what i just said #truly is only the tip of the iceberg WHILE ALSO. SIMULTANEOUSLY. only being One Single Facet. to what he is to me.#BUT ALSO. CONSIDER. the Parallels i'm setting up between alfonse w gustav VS. moe and its mother.#okay i will not say more bc i'll talk forever. final piece i really want to throw out there is though #do you think anna's situation w her family business being The Basis of how she connects w others #do you think the WAY she and all the other annas were Raised is like. comparable to religion actually?#and ESP like. i don't know if there's any hard and fast rules or anything but she and all her sisters ARE.#PRESUMABLY. RAISED A V SPECIFIC WAY. to be highly competitive cut-throat merchants.#what does this mean for COMMANDER anna. one of (if not ONLY?) instance of an anna who fell outside of that.#also is it agab dependant? could you be amab and then later on become an anna if that's what #oh my god i'm thinking of that ratatouille post. accepting of your gender identity but NOT of your Life Choice to be a chef.#is it. exactly like that. and if you're afab and end up being trans do you just fall to the wayside?#like the point is NOT to inject transphobia in here. the point is to ask Okay HOW THE HELL DOES ANY OF THIS WORK???????#bc the Implications go INSANE. and also the point is to ask what is the funniest answer possible to any of the questions #I'M HERE TO HAVE FUN. AND BE INSANE.#like final clarification i only say religion bc that's what i'm familiar with (specifically christainity)#but maybe it's more apt -- a different flavor of traditional family culture that has strict gender roles.

5 notes · View notes

rabbitindisguise · 2 months ago

Text

I forgot how much having a cat was about getting into ten thousand tiny little arguments a day where they do their best to die via unnatural means (poison, electric shock, etc) and you're just like. excuse me. excuse me. please do not??

and then they run around the house a bunch and bite you bite you bite you

#personal #if someone had posted this I would have been like 'oh it sounds like she wants to play!' yeah it does doesn't it #only except for how in the last 24 hrs I was trying to get in some play session time because I was worried about her mental health #but no she said she's old and has bad joints and didn't want to tolerate my tomfoolery #it's only the past. thirty minutes?? that she almost died like four different ways #thank god she has her little window to stare out of #I have a moment of peace to write this post #and now I can't rest easy since I know she's awake and alert and stuff #she also almost scared me half to death because she wasn't eating full meals for like a week. full hunger strike right in my kitchen #so I fed her the yummy smelling (lol no) regular wet food #and she loved it! and then puked. and then . . . kept eating regular meals?#and I wake up today and GUESS WHAT #begging pleading for food like she hadn't eaten in ten thousand years #chewing on scraps from her cardboard scratching post like a miserable orphan #so I fed her the food she hates so much she stopped eating in addition to her regular meals #and she ate half of it #and then chewed on my headphone wires too #cats man #why are they like this

6 notes · View notes

mewharley · 8 months ago

Text

so idk how to explain when I think someone is good looking

because it's a rare occurrence and like I just agree that they look good, that have some charm but that's that

I don't actually want to pursue anything with them or be sad if they have a partner or think about them after that or smth, idk what people actually do or think when they see someone attractive ??? (I've seen people try to give them their contact info and I'm like what but you don't know them ???)

that being said, I had never seen Bruno Mars before but that man is (was?) good looking

pretty wild because when i notice it's about women not men

but I was watching some videos and I'm like ??? how ??????

#Regina Spektor is beautiful too and i want to print the cover of the single Fidelity #but idk just that haha #ive seen girls that are so cute and their attitude #but just that #i don't actually understand when people are like oh my god look at the person and I'm like ok i guess #but like with men is way harder #a lot of times i just think i gueeeess they're good looking? idk man I'm just vibing #this is funny because I only know locked out of heaven hahaha no other song bt i love it i don't care if it talks about sex #it's not annoying and i love the the bridge? idk about music terminology #who else id attractive? idk a sweet girl i met years ago she was playful and cute (and later i learned she was a lesbian lol) but eh #*is #and some random women I've seen that I'm like oh she looks cool #wait fuck is this a “i want to be with her or i want to be her?”? lol #it's too complicated so ehh #also it's not relevant because i prefer a really close friend bestest friend like soul mate as partner but like #the *implications* fuck #how that one post said #i don't want a relationship like that but also more than friendship like the one friendship advanced but that's romance but #but not too much please but also don't leave but i don't want sex things but ok intimacy ok but not too much but but but #fuck it #why is everything so hard #hi people reading my notes usually they compose more than the actual post lol i like to ramble haha #*tags not notes

4 notes · View notes

c0rpsedemon · 1 year ago

Text

ok fr last one but there's actually a bootleg of my school's anastasia and i'm linking it bc you all NEED to understand that my infatuation with this one girl's voice which started when i was in the 6th grade and still hasn't really worn off isn't based on nothing

#brielle's the one in the n95 mask (the video is too grainy to actually make out any of the ensemble's faces but she stands out)#and i'm the in my 'teenage tboy's diy first short haircut' era in every scene she's in #apart from everything abt the girl who plays anya. the tea on everyone else is that our director liked the boy who played gleb's voice so #much that she actually lowered some if not all of his parts to be in his range. the guy who played vlad was a total diva and uhm. the phras #'peaked in high school' has been tossed around at him a lot. and the fact that he came back to sub the year after he graduated isn't helpin #his case. also he pressured the girl who played anya's grandmother into wearing old age makeup + spray her hair grey bc he decided he was #going to wear it and since she's supposed to be older than him she had to too and used to waltz into the girls' changing room whenever he #wanted. everyone was like super shocked during auditions though bc we all thought he was a shoe-in for dimitry esp since seniors get #priority casting bc it's their last chance. but at callbacks (we had singing auditions via video and dance auditions in person and callback #were tacked on to the dance auditions) he kinda flubbed his song and then this freshman. who was with us via google meet bc he literally ha #covid at the time absolutely blew him out of the water and i remember walking away w brielle like 'holy shit [first name] [last name] just #lost a part to a freshman' (he's the kind of person you just have to full name otherwise it sounds wrong). that said i do think he made a #much better vlad then he would've made a dimitry and while he is. a lot. he's always been nice to me and i did briefly idolize him and his #stage presence way i did anya's singing voice but that faded when i got into hs and started actually observing his prima donna ways #(the one production we were in together before in middle school we didn't have any scenes together). the girl who played the grandma #actually shouted me out in cast circle and that's the only time that's ever happened to me. also i'm p sure her dad is/was dating someone m #dad and by extension myself work with so that's. Oh My God. like she (the one who works for my dad) brought him w her to a comedy show as i #think her bf but i'm not 100% sure and when he found out what school i went to he mentioned his daughter went there and despite the fact #that i basically have a script for when people ask me that question bc i do NOT pay attention to most of my fellow students and don't know #anyone i was like 'holy shit' bc i actually did. hm what else. the guy who played the tsar and i used to shittalk bad period dramas #backstage during the first part of act 2. also during the press conference scene i need you to picture all the bolshevik soldiers and #romanov royals doing the macarena behind the curtain bc that was absolutely what we were doing back there. speaking of the press conference #the really high singing w/o a clear source was actually anya standing behind the curtain on the other side of the stage bc she's the only #one who physically could sing the part. also in regards to the bolshevik soldiers. we were originally supposed to have wooden rifles but fo #some reason our director took them out so we had to just walk menacingly towards the romanovs. you can't rlly see me that well in that scen #but that jacket would NOT stay closed and for 2/3 performances i had to awkwardly hold it closed the entire time. luckily the one that was #filmed was the one where i was smart enough to bring safety pins and also saved like all of the ballerinas bc their costumes all started #falling apart at once backstage.#romeo.txt #theatreposting

8 notes · View notes

miharuhebinata · 6 months ago

Text

youtube

a lot was covered in this new trailer but i think we can all agree that the most important was that

YOU CAN CHANGE YOUR OUTFIT. YOU LITERALLY GET TO PLAY DRESS UP WITH ZELDA OH MY GOD ALL MY DREAMS ARE COMING TRUE THANK YOU GOD AND ALSO JESUS AMEN 🙏🙏🙏🙏🙏

#idk why but i didn't even think about that possiblity given it's not a full-on 3D zelda like i just thought we'd be wearing the cloak the #whole game and that'd be that. but i'm guessing different outfits is going to be an important element of all loz games from now on #AND I'M SOOOO HAPPY!!!!!!! and i'm SO glad you can see the way they incorporated so many obvious influences from other mainline zelda games #i feel like that's such a good move oh my god i'm so excited #hurgghhhhh and all the areas look absolutely GORGEOUS OMFG #especially faron wetlands and gerudo desert those were my faves i think. jabul waters looked good too (and such a cool name!)#ALSO HORSE??? YOU GET A HORSE????? i wonder if you get to name it or if it already has a set name. kind of hope it already has a set name #i just think it'd be cool if zelda had a horse that's specifically known as *her* horse the way link has epona. maybe (like epona) it'll #have a default name that you have the option to change? i'd be happy with that. or who knows maybe it doesn't have a name at all lol #gonna be honest though one thing i'm still not thrilled about is the lack of direct combat. i'd much rather beat enemies to death #with the rod lmaoooo but idk i guess i can live with it. like i've said before i'll take what i can get for now 😂#GODDDD I'M JUST SO EXCITED I WISH IT WAS SPETEMBER 26TH ALREADY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#the legend of zelda #the legend of zelda: echoes of wisdom #tloz: eow #loz posting #🎮 tag #game trailers #send tweet

4 notes · View notes

horrorwebs · 1 year ago

Text

why are men literally the fucking worst

#theres a guy in one of my uni friend groups who has a crush on my friend also from the friend group #and she feels so so uncomfortable plus she hasnt done ANYTHING thatd give a hint that she likes him back. bc she doesnt #and now she doesnt feel ok around because hes so attached to her and so so needy and its like. well. way to fuck it up dude. fuck you #he has been acting so strange lately and not in a good way. strange awkward and needy and like. possesive.#her and i also have another friendgroup where frankly i feel much better with and she does too. and its like. well the guy is always like #butting in but now really being part of anything? like its not like he comes over to the grouo to be with all of us hes just sort of . there #talking only to her or sometimes me but its like not nice its weird and annoying #ALSO HES SO PATRONIZING TOWARDS HER ITS AWFUL #AND hes like. a bit older.... where its not like. the weirdest age gap i dont think so. but it IS a bit weird considering some of the things #he has said. like the other day he made a comment about how my friend 'well shes so young like people her age sometimes dont get [x]' like?#if you think she is SOOO young and SOOO out of touch with people your age well why the fuck are you asking others if you have a chance w her #get away from her really #sidenote: today she was telling me and a different friend about this problem and my other friend said it was really uncomfortable and bad +#that he used to think the guy had a thing for ME BEFORE??? and i dont know if he also thought -i- had a thing for him but please god no.#even the hypothetical made me feel super uncomfortable. also i used to feel like that a bit like he might like me and it was bad and gross #so i dropped a comment that let him believe i was a lesbian i think? also got much colder towards him . like. thats what you get fucker #about the lesbian thing i meant that he told me about a friend of his that had it hard coming out as a lesbian and i said like oh yeah being #like that was hard for me also. finding out i was not straight was tough etc .#dont remember if i said the word lesbian i dont think so but i did say i like girls and i didnt mention boys at all so i hoped itd be enough #also people dont really -get- what being asexuas means + didnt want to tell him im ace + techically i Can like boys bc romantic attraction #is undefined to me but i was definetely not going to tell him that bc 1. im much more prone to like a girl and 2. not trying to get his hope #up.#so anyway it was gross to realize other people saw it too so i mightve actually not been insane to think he had a crush on me but it was bad #and also. i really need for my friend to be comfortable in class so i might have to kill him who knows. well see #spikeposting #personal

10 notes · View notes

firebirdsdaughter · 8 months ago

Text

I respect your right…

… To interpret this honestly incredibly vague character writing/story telling in this way. I respect it.

You're wrong, but I respect it.

#Firebird Randomness #not gonna tag the game bc I ain't kicking THAT hornet nest #but listen I am team Adam did nothing wrong #well no okay I am team Adam is a person who has failings and whose entirely life has been trying do well w/ massive consequences #Raven was already predisposed to obsessive behaviour we have no evidence either way that he 'used' her #she was clearly struggling w/ the truth anyway #and if he could just control the other Naytiba why not steer them off Eve more he wanted her to live #he's clearly panicking when she falls in the fight w/ Tachy #but basically it's literally a stalker behaviour to become obsessive about someone who was even perceived as being mildly kind to you #and then convincing yourself they're sending secret messages when they're not hell even fandoms do it we know who I mean #I think Adam's failure there was just not realising how messed up Raven had become possibly bc he was absorbed in research #he was willing to sacrifice himself or this not send proxies to fight like a certain AI #he makes it clear he means no harm to Lily by giving her the hyper cell to help Xion regardless of what happens #like yes in the actual game/writing there's way too much left ambiguous #it's a she said he said when there should be some evidence one way or the other if they wanted to go that way #so I respect your right #I respect your right to not thinking critically about anything and take it all at face value #which is exactly what the evil satellite would want #oh my gods full circle you are not immune to propaganda

3 notes · View notes

ourceliumnetwork · 9 months ago

Text

it is not slacking off to write or create it is not slacking off to do things that are fun i am not slacking off or procrastinating right now i'm allowed to do things i enjoy doing for fun including playing games and writing and such