#i really wish he would move out already. or fall down the stairs. either is fine.
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
aamitmorthos · 10 days ago
Text
.
1 note · View note
hopeluna · 11 months ago
Text
𖦹 ׂ 𓈒 ⋆ ۪ — Barista!Izuku Midoriya
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
♡! hope's notes: this is 50% unrealistic and 50% self indulgent. Tell me what u think lol <3
Tumblr media
It's 7 in the morning when you realise that you're truly, utterly fucked.
You try to convince yourself that it was really your alarm's fault for not waking you up. Because now you are desperately trying to shove everything in your bag, while chewing on the world's driest granola bar and make your way out of your apartment.
You do the calculation in your head as you make your way down the stairs, trying not to trip. Your class is supposed start at 7:15, so you have approximately 5 minutes to get a much needed cup of coffee. And then you need to make run for your class which is 15 minutes, hoping to whatever deity that you'll reach there in 10 minutes.
A groan of frustration escapes you on the sidewalk at the utter slow pace the lady is moving in front of you, talking animatedly on the phone.
You've been late to class enough times this entire week that you're convinced your professor is going to shoot you in the head today. The first thing you notice in front of the cafe is how cute and cozy it looked. Like something straight out of a rom-com set.
There were small little coffee shops like this scattered through almost every road corner outside the campus. Coffee shops, cheap diners and stationaries all looking out for their target customers, drained college students.
This particular coffee shop, you had realised one day talking with your friends, was new and untouched by your hands. You knew that logically it wasn't a great time right now to experiment newly opened shops, no matter how much your friends had been praising the place but you were already late, and the decor and smell of roasted coffee beans seemed too appetizing to pass up.
The gentle chime of the bell at the entrance almost made you forget that your life could possibly be on the line in less than 10 minutes. Your shoulders loose some tension at the faint but noticeable fragrance in the air, the smell of coffee and the muffled sounds of students clicking away on their computers, couples chatting away in excitement and the sound of the workers behind the counter.
Oh yeah, you were definitely forgetting about class for some minutes.
Tapping your fingers to a random rhythm, your eyes immediately go to the cheapest drink on the big menu overhead the counter. Being a college student, you weren't really raking up the big bucks and would rather like to be able to afford instant ramen in the future.
And that's when it happened.
You swore that you almost went blind for about 2 seconds at the absolute beaming, sunshine-filled smile the barista gave you. The simple words "what can I get for you today?" suddenly sounded like the most holiest piece of angel music coming out of his mouth. He was cute, like a lot, with lush green curls falling messily atop his head, freckles doted like stars across his cheeks. You briefly registered the small "Midoriya" name plate attached to his shirt.
"Um, e-excuse me?"
"Yes?"
"I- what can I get you, ma'am?"
"Your number, hopefully"
Shit. The wide eyes and the full flush creeping up on his cheeks made you almost shriek in horror, you didn't mean to say that aloud. Suddenly, the once calming air felt stifling and uncomfortable.
"Uh! I mean- no!", wincing at your own volume, you suddenly wished that the earth would just open up and swallow you whole. "You see, um, that was- a joke! A bad joke!". It took all your strength to not bash your head on the counter under your sweaty palms, cringing at yourself.
The nervous laugh that "Midoriya" let out certainly didn't help the situation either.
You felt the tension lifting off your chest when a girl came up to the counter to ask for more creamer. The next course of action was probably not your proudest moment, definitely something you would look back at and curse yourself for. In your defence, your mind felt scrambled and fried at the whole interaction, so you did the only thing your brain managed to comprehend. You ran.
A few minutes later, already at your campus, you stopped for a second for breath. The frustrated whine you let out next was met with some questioning glances your way that you could not be bothered about right now, your mind only swirling with one thing.
You didn't even get your fucking coffee.
Tumblr media
© hopeluna. Do not copy, translate, modify or repost any of my work in this or any other site. Do not steal or modify my ideas/concepts either.
173 notes · View notes
bibbibib · 1 year ago
Text
Peeta's amputation
One of the things I really wish we'd gotten more information for in the books was the impact of Peeta losing his leg. On himself, on his habits, his reactions, anything really. We don't even know how badly he took it because around that time all Katniss was able to describe was him (understandably) being just happy to have survived it all along with her, plus he was putting on a brave face throughout the interviews, and maybe even in front of her so she would feel less guilty. And, I get it, most of the stuff I'm going to mention is just slice of life and maybe not that important as plot points, but I find them super interesting, for the perspective if anything.
Would Peeta's self-esteem take another deep dive after that? With everything happening during that time (moving out of his parents' house, his falling out with Katniss, being viewed differently by the rest of the district, living alone and possibly lonely, his romantic hopes crushed, PTSD from the Games, etc etc etc) he had a lot of triggers seemingly supporting those thoughts of being useless and uneeded and generally not good enough.
It's so frustrating to lose a limb and have to basically relearn everything from the beginning. How to navigate stairs, how to get in and out of a sitting position, how to balance and not tip over, stuff you've been doing esentially your whole life. And Peeta was athletic, he worked manually, he trusted himself to be capable of doing physical things, so that might have hurt a little more.
How about medical complications? From weird sensations to nerve pain, possibly phantom pains, everything related to his prosthetic leg (which, depending on the type, can get uncomfortable in sooo many ways, especially since he's still a teenager who's growing). And he was dumped at a place with basically no medical care at all, let alone anything specialized. Which, ok, was part of everyone's life in D12 already, but it must have still left a bitter taste... There was no one around to know much about his state, (exept maybe Ripper the liquor seller) and he had to make do on his own.
What if the Capitol had chosen his prosthetic more for aesthetic functions and less for functional? @whenthewallfell has a fantastic post about it, complete with illustrations!
Peeta's artificial foot getting tangled in the vines in the second arena and impeding his ability to run was no funny business. With prosthetic legs, there's usually different kinds for different functions. Your average foot people use to be able to walk is stiff and does a horrible job at supporting these sorts of activities. That's why equipment like running blades exists for amputees who want to be running and jumping. And you have to switch to that before the activity! Peeta apparently never got one. Even if he had, he would have to carry the alternative equipment around in the arena.
Speaking of that, even with a single type of artificial leg/foot, adjustments are frequently needed throughout the day. Most people as far as I understand remove the prosthetic to sleep, but also ball -and-socket models at least move around and need to be put back in place because it gets uncomfortable (sleeves -stump covers- sliding down, etc). The fact that Katniss never mentioned anything like this means that either he was actively not doing it in front of her or she just doesn't wanna talk about it (or maybe his leg is some fancy Capitol tech that doesn't work that way?)
Also, he's got to be hungry. All the time. He needs more food after the amputation, because the rest of his body is compensating for the lost limp and he has to use different muscles/nerves/tendons/etc. that are not designed spesifically for this. The same thing means he gets tired more easily. So Peeta being that active and training for the Quarter Quell while battling insomnia and nightmares with an amputated leg? Even harder than we thought.
358 notes · View notes
aquaticwolfkuri · 4 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
You HATE me, But I HATE You more: ch.5
(sorry for the long wait. I hope this chapter was worth the wait. Comments are most welcome)
Today at Skool, Zim couldn’t help but notice all the other students were talking about “Prom” And who they were going to ask to go with them or what they were going to wear.
At first Zim just assumes its just some useless Urthling ritual… but than he hears something about “Prom king, and prom Queen” 
Curious, Zim pulled out a small device from his pack and searches through the human database to figure out what exactly the prom king is, and to his delight, it seems like becoming Prom king could help him rule the Skool and possibly even the whole Urth!
Zim begins to laugh, but he's interrupted when Dib suddenly appears behind him.
“Just what are you up to now?” Dib asks, narrowing his eyes at the alien.
 Zim nearly jumps before quickly moving away, putting distance between them.
“Why, I'm just SO curious about this, PROM thing that everyone is talking about” Zim says, but Dib doesn't seem to take this very well.
“Oh no you don't Zim. You are NOT going to ruin my chances to take Plotty to the prom!” This disgusts Zim.
“That PLOTTY-human is just mind controlling you, Dib! She's making you too stupid to see it”
“Whatever Zim, I'm taking Plotty to the prom and I'm not letting you ruin this for me” Dib says says before walking away. Zim glares, furious. 
“Ugh! Stupid Dib! Why does he still insist on being around that Plotty!? I already told him about her mind control, but he just refuses to listen to me…!” Zim grumbles, wishing he could choke the other boy until his eyes popped out, but even if he did, Dib would probably still insist on being around that GIRL....
Suddenly, Zim feels his chest tighten and something sickly in his belly. He quickly scans himself with his device again, but once more, his vitals appeared to be normal like usual.
Just what had Dib done to him?? Was it some kind of undetectable human poison???
Sitting at his desk, Dib vaguely listens to his history teacher while he watches the sky through the window, trying not to fall asleep… but he dozed off anyway.
It's not of any particular memories, but Dib dreams about being 12 again, trying to catch Zim and stop his evil plans… Things really aren't like that anymore, are they?
Zim has become a lot less focused on conquering the earth and more so just harassing him. And Dib on the other hand has nearly put his paranormal investigations to the side to focus on High Skool and just be… a normal teenager.
“Dib.”
“Nh….”
“Dib…!”
“Zim…??” Lifting his head from his desk, Dib groggily opens his eyes, only to realize the person in front of him is his teacher, looking none too pleased with his recent nap.
“Dib, I'll excuse you this time, but if you fall asleep in class again, I'll have to report you,” She says.
“Y-Yes ma’am,” Dib replies, not wanting his dad to hear another word about his misdemeanors at Skool again.
He sighs, wishing he was home right now, feeling kind of depressed after that dream.
When he looks out the window, he realizes it started to rain while he had been asleep. It's a good thing he's always prepared… Zim on the other hand, did not come prepared.
Since there hadn't been any rain, Zim forgot to bathe in his paste this morning.
Once Skool was over, everyone grabbed their umbrellas, and those who forgot to bring their own either had a friend to share with or made a mad dash home.
Zim nervously stared at the rain. It was a week ago that he applied his paste, but maybe it would still be effective?? He sticks a finger out only to quickly retract it, feeling it burn from just a single drop of rain.
Zim cursed under his breath, wishing he had never believed a human weather-man, as clearly, the sky wasn't as sunny as predicted.
Unfortunately, however, while standing around, one of the students decided to have some fun and shoved Zim down the small flight of stairs and into the rain. Zim hits the ground, feeling the small puddle of water forming on the concrete burn his skin, as well as the rest of the endless downpour falling from the sky. He screams and squirms around like a dying bug before managing to get up off the ground and under a tree.
This new shelter doesn't provide much cover, but it was better than nothing.
Feeling his body burn and blister, Zim holds himself tightly, damning this planet's water.
“W-Why does it hurt more than usual??? “ Did it have something to do with whatever Dib had done to him???
Excited to finally get home, Dib meets up with Gaz, telling her his amazing plan about sharing an umbrella with Plotty, but she doesn't seem that interested, instead, she seems more interested in a particular tree out by the front of the Skool.
“Gaz are you-” Dib stops mid-sentence, noticing a few of the students laughing, mimicking some kind of bug before pointing at the same tree Gaz was staring at. Then, it finally clicks. Zim is behind the tree.
Dib looks at the tree for a moment, but he can hear Plotty approaching with her friends… He looks back towards the tree again, thinking about his recent dream…
“Hey, Gaz… I'll meet you back home. Tell Dad I’m running late.” 
“Alright…” Gaz says, and just like that, Dib takes off toward the tree without saying another word. She watches and smiles ever so slightly, approving of her brother’s decision.
“What's wrong Space boy? Did your robot eat all your paste again??” Dib laughs, mocking the green boy. Zim glares, furious, especially because Gir actually wasn't at fault this time.
“Silence, Dib-worm!! I-” Before Zim can continue, Dib suddenly holds out his umbrella over his head. Zim’s body instantly feeling relief from the rain with the new shelter.
“Unlike you MIGHTY Irkens, I can handle the rain,” Dib says, letting himself get completely soaked by the rain.
Zim glares at him, feeling something sickly and squirmy in his stomach again, so he shoves Dib to the ground after taking the umbrella.
“You- Do not mock the Irken empire!!” Zim says, but Dib just laughs.
“D-Do not laugh at Zim!!” 
“I’ll stop laughing when you're MIGHTY empire isn't affected by a little water” “Dib teases, standing back up to his feet. 
Pissed, Zim begins to make his way home, but he's annoyed further when Dib follows him.
“Do not follow Zim! Just because you gave me this water shield device, does not mean I will allow you into my base!” Zim hisses.
“It's an umbrella. And yeah, I know… but if I don't walk back with you I won't get my umbrella back, and I'm pretty sure Dad’ll be mad if I lose another umbrella” Dib says, walking beside Zim.
Zim grumbles, but its when Dib suddenly sneezes that Zim practically jumps like a cat and backs away from him, his back hitting the wooden fence beside him.
“G-GERMS!!!”
“It was just a sneeze Zim” Dib says, hoping the alien won't come back to Skool covered in weird burger meat again.
“But….so….GERMY!”
“Zim-!” Dib sneezes again and Zim screams.
“D-don't come any closer to Zim!!” Zim says, most likely threatening to kick Dib if he didn't listen.
“Geez, alright” Dib, not wanting any more injuries, agrees to keep his distance, rolling his eyes.
While they continue the rest of the walk in silence, Dib starts to shiver and can't help but wish he had just walked Plotty home, then he would still be dry and wouldn't be freezing his butt off for the ungrateful alien.
Zim on the other hand, was somewhat pleased that Dib was antagonizing him again instead of drooling over that stupid GIRL, even if he WAS annoying.
He looks at Dib for a moment, soaking wet as he gets pelted by the rain, then he looks down at the umbrella handle in his hands, and his stomach feels sick again, but this time, his chest tightens.
Thanks to this device, his body was already dry and his pack had healed his body from the rain, but Dib was just a weak and pathetic human, so his temperature had gradually dropped while in the rain… and despite that, he still gave away his water shield device to him.
Zim, staring at the ground intensely, steps close enough to Dib, allowing the umbrella to cover them both. Confused and even shocked, Dib looks at him with a bewildered expression. 
“U-unlike you STUPID humans, I, A MIGHTY Irken, can recover quickly from such rain…! So… Zim shall share…. BUT DON'T EVER SPEAK OF THIS AGAIN!!!” Zim says, his face suddenly feeling warmer than usual.
Dib just stares at him, and blinks a few times… because he had to be seeing things right? There was no way Zim was… blushing right now…right???
“I-I won't, promise…” Dib says, but when he wipes away the water from his glasses, Zim was already looking away…
He must have just been seeing things earlier. He’s pretty sure Zim isn’t even capable of blushing.
The walk home is still silent, but Dib's been able to somewhat dry off a little bit by staying out of the rain, and thankfully, the rain finally starts to let up as Zim’s house comes into view.
As usual; upon his arrival, Zim’s ROBO Parents welcome him home, as well as Gir from the kitchen..
Dib couldn't help but lean over, feeling nostalgic at the sight of the house, as well as the smell of freshly made waffles coming from the kitchen.
Zim freezes, his antennas practically sticking out of his wig when Dib’s chest presses against his face. The dampness of the shirt burns, but that's not why Zim’s face was burning up, his heart racing, as if desperate for oxygen.
“Y-Y-You're mission is over!! N-Now be gone with you!!” Zim says, shoving Dib onto the pavement, and tossing him the umbrella back before quickly slamming the door behind him. His heart was pounding so quickly, he thought his chest might burst, and his face felt so hot, he felt like he had been baking in the sun, not to mention the weird flippy feeling in his belly.
“T-This is simply not normal!!”
“Aww, what's wrong master??” Gir asks.
“ T-That Dib….h-he 's done something to me!! H-he’s planted a bomb inside me or something!!” Gir cheers in delight, wishing he himself could explode.
“Q-Quite Gir! T-Tests! I need to run more tests!” Zim says before he rushes to the lab, running various tests on himself, and typing in all the strange symptoms he's been experiencing. He runs everything through the computer, hoping to get a proper diagnosis this time.
“Calculation complete. Results. You are in love with the Dib creature.”
“What!? There must be some kind of mistake!! I can't love! I'm Irken!! A-And Dib is the enemy!!” Zim says, feeling his face heat up and his chest swell, almost as if his own body was disagreeing with him.
“According to Irken history. Love is not impossible for the Irken empire, it is simply just irrelevant. Though unused, Irkens still retain their required bodily organs for reproductive purposes in case the Irken Empire should ever reach dangerously low numbers resulting in near extinction.” The computer exclaims, horrifying its master.
“T-This can't be…!! I-I can't possibly be in love with Dib….!! I… I HATE him!!” Zim says, as if declaring war with the universe, and maybe even himself.
51 notes · View notes
niftynellie · 2 years ago
Text
• Bubble-hawk •
Pairings: reader x Jude Bellingham
Warnings: fluff
Tumblr media
Moving in together was something you and Jude had spent alot of your relationship fantasising about, those dreams only increasing in need and want when Jude made the move over to Dortmund and you began university. The two of you would squeeze in facetimes and text messages every second you could find in your busy schedules, and almost always the conversation would move to how much easier and simpler your relationship would be if there wasn't a literal ocean between you. Of course you both traveled back and fourth between the UK and Germany whenever you could but it still wasn't the same. You even found yourslef wishing on a few occasions that he still lived at home with his parents like he did before. When you would sneak in through his bedroom window each night just to fall asleep beside him and leave in the morning before either of your mums would notice.
Years after those little "I can't wait until I can come home to you everydays" began, it was finally your reality. Thought the first week had been nothing less of a nightmare. But even With shipping companys delivering late and a cupbaord shelf caving in causing a landslide of plates crashing to the ground, you couldn't be happier that you were finally settled in and the weekend had arrived. There was still little bits of work that needed to be done around the house before you would fully consider yourself moved in but after spending the first week with Jude everything was quickly becoming home to you.
One of the many things that drew you and Jude to the house, were the bathrooms. They were gorgeous. You particularly felt drawn to the larger then life bathtub in the en suit for yours and Judes bedroom. Instantly picturing how relaxing your sunday self care sessions would be in a bath of that size.
You'd been looking forward to it for much longer than you cared to admit. So when sunday evening rolled around you basically skipped up the stairs after you'd put the dishes from dinner into the washer and left Judes waiting for him on the side, knowing he wasn't far away from being home after a he'd played in a match earlier in the day.
Once in the bathroom you closed the door behind you, not really caring to much about locking it, your first step in the never changing routine was to set up your playlist the sound of SZA's voice filled the room as you happily danced around grabbing everything you needed.
You weren't aware of how long exactly you'd taken to gather everything and start running the bubble bath and you were sure it hadn't been to long. But soon enough with your back to the door you heared it creep open. you were looking down at the tub checking you hadn't run it to hot or cold, when you felt Jude's arms wrap around your waist and his chin drop down onto your shoulder.
"hey baby" you spoke softly spinning in his grip to face him placing a sweet kiss on his pouty lips. "you started without me" he teased nodding over to the skincare you'd laid out on the side. "I didn't think you were serious when you said you wanted to join in" you huffed a laugh "let me just have my bath then we'll start" you said unraveling from the mans arms as you remembered it was in fact still running behind you. You turned the tap off satisfied with the depth, warmth and bubble ratio.
But by the time you'd done that Jude was already tugging his shirt up over his head, "we'll just share to save time" he joked, his joggers quickly falling to the floor beside his discarded shirt. Jude slide into the bath first as you still stood in your robe. His arms stretched out to rest along the edge of the bath has he leant back sighing happily the bubbles covering him. He looked up at you with a smirk reaching out and tugging the tie on your robe making it fall open. "come on baby get in, cold without you"
You shook your head laughing as you left your robe hung on the side and went to get into the bath, your original idea was to sit opposite Jude and face him. But as you stepped in his hands went to your waist rearanging you sit between his legs. Tugging you so your back rested against his chest. "much better" he stated. The two of your wearing matching smiles, as you both relished in the comfort of the warm water and eachothers presence. you silently praising whoever chose to build such a large tub, it really was the perfect size for two.
No words were spoken for a few moments, you both sat in silence listening to whatever song was now playing. Judes hands left the tub edge and came forward his fingers playing with the tips of your hair that floated ontop of the water. "want me to wash your hair" he asked, though it sounded more like a statement rather then a question. You sat up slightly and looked over your shoulder at him, "only if you let me do yours too" you countered, knowing that as much as he loved to take care of you he was also tired from a long day and needed the care and attention aswell.
Jude nodded in agreement before he went to reach for the shampoo, though he hesitated slightly when he saw the amount if bottles beside him. You laughed before picking up the right bottle and handed it to him. He squeezed out the product and got to work lathering it into your roots. His fingers massaging your scalp at the same time, you let out a sigh releshing in the feeling, making him grin. Jude rinsed the shampoo out from your hair and continued on with the conditioner. A smile never left your lips and you were having a hard time telling if it was the water that was keeping you so warm or if it was the growing feeling in the pit of your stomach.
Jude finished and you switched places your back now against the edge and Jude between your legs. He sat scooping up bubbled in his hands as you worked your way through his hair routine, blowing them out of his palms and getting them all over the bathroom floor. When you were done Jude spun around and sat opposite you, a cheeky smirk replacing his smile. He scooped up another handful of bubbles and blew them over into your face. Laughing as you wiped them out fo your eyes. A playful frown tugging at your features had him lunging forward clutching even more bubbles, so many you were surprised that there were even any left in the bath after his antics. He dumped the handful ontop of your head and another cackle left his lips. Jude grabbed your wrists and stopped you from swiping the bubbles away.
"you know..." he trailed off his tingue poking his cheek in concentration as he reached up and started shaping the blob of bubbles. "...maybe a mohawk is the look for you" he chuckled sitting back and admiring his work. You laughed along with him as you caught sight of yourself in the mirror. "It's definitely a look. I dont know about it being the look" you giggled shaking the blob from ontop your head.
"no no, I think we're onto something here, the bubble mohawk is really gonna catch on" he teased his hands dropping onto your knees as they were proped up beside him.
"the bubble-hawk" you mocked, his eyes instantly lighting up as he laughed.
371 notes · View notes
sunnyfoxsstuff · 4 months ago
Text
Hello! Hi! Im quite happy tonight lol between @shadowfuka here's the draw of Ghost shi qingxuan!
Tumblr media
Be the judge buddy >;p i hope y'all like this little Fanart i made of my own fanfic! With that imma hop onto the fanfic!
Chapter 4: meeting again
Xie lian, hua cheng and shi qingxuan all shared their deserved diner
After this they went to sleep, hua cheng and xie lian sharing the same bed again it obviously became an habit while on the other hand shi qingxuan was in the guest room however he could not find sleep imediatly so he stared mostly outside looking at the nature around and falling asleep beside's the stair's of the front of puqi shrine,
In the morning the Sun ray's woked shi qingxuan up he wasnt really hungry but he decided to prepare breakfast for xie lian and hua cheng he wasnt expecting any special reaction about it from hua cheng he was more doing it for his friend as a part of pay back for his past help he had offered, not too long After xie lian woke up walking toward's the kitchen to shi qingxuan
XL:"i could've made breakfast y'know you dont need to work or do chore's around" he said feeling a bit awkward
SQX:"pff-" waving his hand "dont worry about it and i wanted to Cook breakfast since you two were still asleep i didnt wanted to bother" he said smiling looking for a minute at his friend before putting his attention back on the food he was cooking
XL:"how-..how does it feel?"
SQX:"huh?" Confused by the question his Friend had just asked
XL:"like uh- yknow? Dying and being a Ghost like- how did it felt? How do you feel?" He said smiling awkwardly
SQX:"since when did you figure it out? But i suppose i cant really hide it well yet, and didnt you asked hua cheng that? He's a Ghost even better he's a Ghost king" he say's joyfull as his usual self extending his arm's up making dramatising gestures
XL:"no i didnt asked him i usually dont it feel's kind of awkward and personnal to Ask someone 'bout their death" fidgeting with his finger's looking down a little
SQX:"hm well i suppose i could tell you, however my death wasnt really tragic unlike other people's that either die saving someone or on war or protecting someone you should know you said it yourself that i was sick gotta admit it felt like torture staying back there sitting and not being able to properly digest my food like literally! I couldnt even move!" He say's a bit annoyed about it "i was already slow because of my limbs which by the way dont really hurt anymore cant deny the pain is still a tiny bit present i dont know why or how so i keep the bandage's just incase who know's but as for my death, first my injuries were pretty Bad and barely had even healed of course and seccond i suppose the illness got me.." he said pausing for minute
A silence fell for a little while, while these minute's xie lian was preparing the bowl's for their breakfast seeing that shi qingxuan was almost done
XL:"i wish i had came back and picked you up" he said with a sad tone
SQX:"naaaa! I didnt even feel my death i just closed my eye's one morning After waking up and..poof! I was a soul!" He say's with a brighter tone bringing the rice and putting some in each bowl's not really filling his enough
XL:"sooo you didnt feel anything?" Tilting his head
SQX"nope! Not even a pinch!" Saying proudly putting the vegetables on the rice with an omelette
XL:"why did you became a Ghost then? You're not one to want vengeance and your brother is-" he shutted his mouth before saying one more word
SQX:"yeah well i thought i would pass on After all there was nothing else to do but,.." he paused thinking about that moment for a minute until he got snapped out of his thought's
XL:"but?" He said looking at shi qingxuan who's smile had wore off because of his thought's
SQX:"i saw a black silhouette looking at me with golden eye's" he say's seriously "you're probably thinking i imagined it but i didnt" he stopped seeing xie lian wanting to speak and without loosing a second he exclaimed what he was thinking
XL:"wait! So you're saying, black water sinking ship"
SQX:"mhm"
XL:"the one that traumatised you and killed your brother!," he exclaimed louder
SQX:"yeeesssssss i mean my brother was kinda going insane obviously but i still love him of course he'll always stay my ge'" he answered
XL:"why would that one person Come see you it's odd" he paused thinking with his usual thinking pose while hearing hua cheng waking and sitting at the table too and shi qingxuan starting to munch on his food
HC:"it doesnt look like what you usually Cook gege" he said looking at xie lian snapping him out of his hard thinking
XL:"oh!- yes, that's because i didnt made it shi qingxuan did he didnt wanted to bother us since he woke up before us" smiling at hua cheng finally taking the bowl and eating it without any more word's hua cheng on the other hand looked like a kid a picky eater toying a bit with his vegetables even so he still ate a little bit of it since xie lian seemed to appreciate the food
However soon enough hua cheng felt a stare and looked in the direction of shi qingxuan raising an eyebrow looking at his bowl seeing that he was empty, he tried to ignore the stare of this..New ghost but he couldnt shake it off and put down his chopsticks turning his head to shi qingxuan which had now a side smile and he started glaring back, not giving up shi qingxuan continued his stare and with that they continued their stare glare fight while sometimes breaking it to answer xie lian
In the morning shi qingxuan went off in the forest wanting to explore while hua cheng insisted that xie lian stay's and pass Time together, soon the afternoon came shi qingxuan was coming back while hua cheng was displeased with the presence of a so said 'ghost king' he looked more like a angry fish to hua cheng's eye's, xie lian however tried to make him at home but he'd refuse to enter puqi shrine as to not get more debt from hua cheng
Hua cheng and he xuan were kinda bickering seeing who would Snap at who first like a competition, when suddenly someone got Heard from a far sounding like as if they were running back
SQX:"your highness look what i got!-" he'd exclaim happily to then stop straight infront the three of them seeing he xuan up close again made him feel, fear, with a mix of a bit of happiness and didnt quite know how to act
Xie lian came toward's his friend continuing his talk "what is it what you got?" He answered as if to change his thought's
Shi qingxuan looked at xie lian for a little and then openned outer robe a bit a little white bird peeking his head out
XL:"he look's adorable! You shouldnt take animal's like that though he's a wild bird!"
SQX:"i do what i want" saying proudly "beside's he's the one that came on my shoulder he was cold so i putted him in there" petting the bird's head
He xuan just observed he didnt know why hua cheng asked him to come and seeing qingxuan standing right there wasnt feeling right, he was sure to have seen him die that day, that morning
Suddenly hua cheng coughed a little bit only to bring the attention to him "he xuan i asked you to come because thi- his highness's 'friend'. Wanted to see you dont make me do it twice." He said with a strict tone grabbing xie lian bringing him inside not wanting to deal anymore with these two he had already beared shi qingxuan's presence long enough he had even dared to cook breakfast instead of his highness saying that he was pissed would be an understatement
Both of the ghost's stared at the door that had been slammed shut right infront their nose, they both felt awkward not knowing how to start the conversation something qingxuan was usually good at, for once he xuan started talking first
HX:"so you're not dead?" Talking with the same monotone tone as before
SQX:"actually- i am-" he answered awkwardly fidgeting with his finger's
HX:"qingxuan" he sighed crossing his arm's "why are you here dont tell me it was to see me because as far as i can tell your body is against being near me." He said coldly not looking away
and he wasnt wrong qingxuan's hand's were horribly shaking he still tried to hide it by putting his hand's behind his back and smile a forcefull smile he didnt know why he couldnt just smile right now, "well i thooought we could probably start over? Our friendship, i wanna get to know you" he exclaimed with a bit of a shaky voice
HX:"sure." Still cold still monotone no change's "but i dont recall you having a home"
SQX:"i'll build my own house we could share it!-" he said determined and bold while the bird flew off back into the wild where he belong
He xuan take a sigh before walking off with an instant shi qingxuan was right behind him following
SQX:"he xuan where are you goooiiiiing!? Wait for me!" His bad leg betraying right on that moment falling face flat down on the dirt
He xuan stopped and looked back amused at the sight but keeping a neutral face, walking back toward him handing out a hand as to help him get up shi qingxuan accepted the help of course a bit embarrassed about falling down like toddler that barely knew how to walk
HX:"your leg isnt healed isnt it?" Looking down at the Bad leg that qingxuan was keeping up
SQX:"uhm, well it depend on the time sometime's it does hurt sometime's it doesnt" he answered to then saying lowly "i didnt thought it would hurt right now, its embarrassing it was fine until now"
HX:"you Can walk or do you need a stick?" He raised an eyebrow looking at him
SQX:"i'd rather die than keep a walking stick by my side!" He exclaimed with a pouting face
HX:"..you are already dead idiot" slapping gently qingxuan's back head
SQX:"hey!"
After a little while of fighting and chatting which was as usual only qingxuan talking he xuan made a teleportation array to a nice spot and offered qingxuan to live in a small but big enough house that had been abandonned there,
He wasnt much of a builder so he agreed and so their journey together started.
Imma stop here i feel like i wrote longer than usual! However i loved writing this chapter my creativity just kept flowing lol x)
26 notes · View notes
sr-sam-bodypillow · 6 months ago
Text
hoogh im thinking about stancat123. he’s so cute frrrrr… so behold! nsfw stan x reader headcanons since I’m simping on main. no gendered pronouns but reader is afab
[full disclosure this was first put into my drafts in fucking January. time is a myth i have adhd]
stan is overall kind of a disaster of a guy (affectionate). you would absolutely have to make the first move and flirt with him
he’s so warm…. like human hot water bottle. good for hugging.
he would absolutely ramble about topics that he likes for hours on end and it’s adorable
i don’t think he’s a good cook. like, at all. im pretty sure he managed to give himself food poisoning within a few weeks of living by himself. he goes into the kitchen and creates biohazards modern horror writers only wish they could create. but he makes up for it with enthusiasm and puppy-dog eyes, so you two spend a lot of time cooking together (he improves. eventually)
when you snuggle in bed he starts out as the little spoon but you end up waking up to his limbs tangled around you as he clings onto you like a weird lanky koala
he’s also NOT a morning person at all. he’s like a siren but instead of leading your ship into the rocks with his singing he leads you back into the warm and comfy bed in the morning when you have things to do with his cute snoring and 🥺 face. when he does get up it’s always after 10am (unless he has something to do) and he shuffles around awkwardly like a zombie for an hour until his brain properly wakes up. he has fallen asleep in his breakfast and on your shoulder whilst standing several times and you’ve got a lot of photos
it’s so easy to make him flustered, you hold his hand in public in the beginning of your relationship and he can’t make eye contact with anyone for the next two hours
you accidentally give him a hickey once and he walks into the office, screams at a such a high pitch that has some people think that a bird has gotten stuck in the room, turns around runs out and promptly falls down the stairs.
the only thing he bruises is his ego. you were the one bruising his neck ;)
he’s very submissive in bed. he likes the feeling of someone else taking control of him, telling him exactly what to do and how to do it. he doesn’t have to think for a while, and for a few hours all he will ever be is a pretty little pet, a living dildo for you to use and pleasure yourself with as you see fit, exisiting solely to make you feel good and he fucking loves it.
he’s definitely got a big dick, and his dick’s pretty thick too. this does not change how much of a bottom he is and if anything it makes it more adorable
pet play. god, he’d be so big on pet play. again, he loves being ordered around, so he happily puts on a collar and lets you put a leash on him, tongue lolling out of his mouth as he pants slightly. his mind goes fuzzy and he finds it hard to think, but he doesn’t mind since you’re doing all the thinking for him. he finds it a bit harder to control himself, so sometimes he ends up humping your thighs sloppily to get off and even though both of you know that you’re going to need to punish him later for being a bad boy and touching himself when he wasn’t allowed to, you don’t stop him because the little moans and whimpers he makes as he tries to fuck your thighs, spreading his pre everywhere as he bucks his hips against you shakily sound so damn good
he’s really fucking kinky even though it embarrasses him a bit. like you name it he’s either willing to try it or he’s already jerked off to it. hands? check. choking? absolutely! face sitting? god yes, he wants you to smother him so badly. pegging? spanking? wax play? he’s already been trying to figure out how to ask you about that. knife play? he wasn’t too sure about this but he had a dream recently where you held him at knifepoint and he woke up to realise that he’d come in his pants, so yes.
also PEGGING. holy shit he’d probably love to be pegged, love the feeling of your skin pressing up against him as you slam into him over and over again ruthlessly until he cums all over himself. spanking, too. he wants you to slap his ass till it bruises, and there’s a chance you could probably get him to finish just by slapping his ass
yknow how i mentioned that he loves to ramble about topics he likes? imagine starting to grind up against him as he talks, slipping your hands underneath his shirt and seeing just how long he can keep his composure, words starting to slur together as he gasps and groans, desperately trying to stop himself from moaning like the needy little whore you both know he is. he doesn’t last long, and soon he’s on his knees with his head in between your thighs, using his mouth for something that’s equally as productive and enjoyable for the both of you.
he probably sends you a lot of nudes. like every single image/video he sends you during the day is a Risky Click because it’s either something absolutely adorable and goofy like him showing you how many books he can stack on his head or it’s his fully erect, thick throbbing cock with precum leaking from the tip as he softly moans your name like it’s the only thing in life that matters, tears of overstimulation rolling down his cheeks, pretty brown eyes clouded with lust, one hand groping his chest and playing with his cute pink nipples, the other slowly pumping two of his fingers in and out of his perfect ass whilst he’s rambling about how he wishes you were home with him because he wants you to fuck him so badly and he just can’t wait any longer and he’s so sorry but surely you can understand that he’s too horny to not fuck himself like this
Voyeurism kink…. it’d absolutely embarrass him to admit it but he definitely gets off to the thought of people watching him, you included. he’s put on a show for you quite a few times, taking off all his clothes and slowly edging himself with a dildo or vibrator until he can’t take it anymore, the overstimulation breaking him. he just wants you to watch him be your perfect little slut <3
once you get past the initial hurdle of literally everything embarrassing him and you realise just how much of a needy pervert he actually is you both start to do a lot more somewhat public stuff. he starts wearing a collar around everywhere, hiding it beneath his clothes, starts asking you to give him more hickeys in visible spots because he loves it when people can see just who he belongs to
if he ever tops you it’s more of a service top thing with a lot of body worship. he may be on top but he’s still submissive, doing exactly what you ask of him and doing all he can to make sure that you feel good
all in all, adorable subby pervert. thank you for coming to my Ted talk
4 notes · View notes
p0ttersglasses · 2 years ago
Text
Late nights |
Paring: colby Brock x reader
Words: ( 2.0k)
Warnings: none. Just a cute little story of Colby and x reader falling asleep. Takes place when they all lived in the trap house.
It was going to be a long night for you. Recently you have started to work at a restaurant to earn a little extra money on the side to help pay the bills of the house that you just got in LA. You won’t lie, it is pretty darn nice. Your friends however had asked you plenty of times if you ever wanted to move in with them, but you said no. You really wanted to try and be able to support yourself first, but things have gotten pretty bad recently.
The apartment complex that you live in is not as great as it looks. Your a 21 year old female living by yourself, and people tend to take notice, so that is what scares you the most. However, the management sucks as, and it’s really making you upset even more. Now, all you want to do is relax and go to bed, before your day off tomorrow.
But it looks like you can’t do that. You could see cop cars around the building and ambulances as well, pulling up to one of the cops you ask them a question. “Hello, officer!” You started off trying to sound as nice as possible.
He just looked your way and didn’t seem to want to pay attention to you. You sighed. “Are residents allowed to-,” before you could finish your sentence you were rudely interrupted.
“No ma’am. Not to we figure out the situation, I suggest rent a hotel for the night.” That was rude. God you didn’t have enough money to rent a hotel for one night, but you did have one more option. It was late when you pulled off to the side of the road, ten p.m. your usually in bed by then. Picking up the same phone that you have had since 2013, ( it’s now 2016) you scrolled through your contacts and clicked on the name, Colby Brock.
Colby Brock. He’s a well known YouTuber who you met three years ago when he first moved to La, during a party. You guys didn’t become friends until a couple of months later. You have showed up in their videos as well a couple times, just not the ones where they go look for ghosts. Your not ready for that quite yet. His partner is Sam Golbach. He’s very friendly and a good friend of yours. Your friend, Katrina Stuwart, who you made at the party is falling for him so hard. You can’t wait till they date.
It was until the third ring when he picked up. “Y/n, what’s up! It’s late are you ok?” He questioned. He knew you were probably asleep by now, so it’s weird for you to call him at this hour.
“My apartment has tons of cops and ambulances. I don’t know the reason, and I probably can’t spend the night. Can I sleep over at yours?” You waited a couple of seconds before he answered. He sounded happy.
“Yes you can! See you twenty.” You sighed, finally having a place to sleep tonight. Colby was right, it only took twenty minutes to go over to Sam and his house, that they share with a few of their friends; Jake Webber, Corey Scherer, Elton Castee, and Aaron Doh. Everyone knows who you are, they are adore you.
Putting in the password so the gate could open, you pulled in and turned off your car. Walking up to the door, before you could knock, Colby opened it. You smiled going in for a hug.
“Stalking me?” You joked as he chuckled. “You wish.” Walking into the house you were familiar with you wondering what the boys were doing. “Where is everyone else?” You questioned as you walked up stairs, probably going to his room.
“Sam is with Katrina,” which you knew about their date already, “and everyone else is either in their rooms or trying to find something to do around the house, they all know your here.” You two got to talking easily, like you always do. Walking up to his room, it was a bit messy, but whose room isn’t?
“Don’t mind the mess.” You put your bag down and headed off to his bed. You guys have had sleep overs before. You would talk about dates you’ve been on, horrible school stories and anything that came to mind.
Before coming here you took off your make up. Colby loves seeing you with out it. Yes he loves it when it’s on, but he loves seeing your natural face without make up. “The usual?” You asked as the two of you laid beside each other as he turned on his tv to watch Harry Potter. You guys were now on goblet of fire.
It was a rough night to begin with, but you loved spending it with Colby. He knew how to make things better. As you got tired before Harry got called out for his name being in the cup, you found yourself falling asleep. As you did, Colby held you tightly and fell asleep soon after, loving falling asleep with you.
104 notes · View notes
imagine-you · 2 years ago
Text
Reach Out and Touch Faith pt. 6 (Steve Harrington/Reader)
Tumblr media
Summary: You leave Hawkins for the summer and come back to a total shitshow. The new mall burned down, Chief Hopper and Billy among the causalities, and everyone, including Steve, seems to be hiding something from you. To make matters worse, you keep hearing and seeing Billy, but that can’t be possible. Billy’s dead…isn’t he?
Word Count: 2.7k
Author’s Note: This is the sequel to Boys Like You. Be warned, there is some angst, but I swear this will have a happy ending.
Boys Like You / Read on AO3
You were lost in thought for the rest of the evening. Steve seemed to realize he wasn't going to get much of a response out of you if he asked you anything, so he settled into silence at your side, letting you journey through your whirlwind of thoughts and suspicions at your own pace.  
Was Billy alive? Everyone swore that he was dead, but then why was he still lingering? Why could you hear him and feel his presence everywhere? He was a ghost, drifting in and out of your life, taunting you. 
You were worried that maybe all of this wasn't real. Maybe you were starting to go crazy or you were already there. Maybe the shock of losing your best friend had created a grief-fueled fantasy in your mind.  
It was a lot of ‘maybes’ that had you doubting the threads of reality that had woven themselves together since you got back to Hawkins. There was no Upside Down and no young girls with superpowers. There was no monster and no fantastical explanation for why people happened to disappear and mysteriously die in Hawkins. Maybe there really was just a fire at the mall that took the lives of several people, including your best friend.  
You could feel yourself beginning to doubt everything you had been told. This had to be a dream, right? Or some kind of coping mechanism your brain had cooked up.  
But despite the doubt, you couldn't help but hope. It couldn't be a conspiracy. Steve was incredibly real and right there and telling you that you weren't crazy. Steve wouldn’t lie to you. Not ever and certainly not about something this important.  
There was another dimension that held monsters and ghouls and it might just hold your best friend.   
Steve dozed off on your bed once night started to give way to morning, but you were having trouble falling asleep. Steve had tried, you knew, to stay awake with you. You appreciated the gesture, but you would rather him get some rest, even if you couldn't.  
It was almost three in the morning before you finally found yourself lying down, counting the sound of every one of Steve's soft breaths, letting them lull you into a light doze.  
You jerked awake at the sound of the phone ringing. The sound was loud and echoed through the house, but Steve didn't even stir at the noise. You expected to hear your mom's door open and the sound of her footsteps trailing down the hall, but she didn't seem to wake at the sound either.  
The phone kept ringing and ringing and ringing and you finally found enough strength to pull away from sleep's clutches to roll out of bed. Steve didn't move, still lost in slumber, so you crept across the room, making sure to be silent. You skipped the floorboards that would creak and shuffled down the stairs, keeping to the edges to avoid any that were sure to make a noise.  
The phone was still ringing when you made it to the living room. You hesitated for a moment, your hand hovering over the receiver, before you finally made yourself grab the phone. You put it to your ear, static answering you. You thought maybe it was a wrong number or a prank. Who would possibly call you this early in the morning? But there was a feeling, deep down in your gut, that had you staying on the line, not daring to hang up.  
Because you just knew.  
"Hello?" You tried, your voice straining on the word. You were abruptly aware of how dry your mouth was and how much you wished you had a glass of water to wash away the feeling.  
There was only static for what felt like hours. It was a sound burning itself into your brain, drowning out everything else.  
And then finally, a break.  
"Y/N," came through, faint and broken, but there.  
You felt a sob claw free from your throat, grief and relief warring for space in your chest.  
"Billy?" 
More static, jarring and choppy in your ear.  
"Yeah," he answered. "I didn't think this would work. Seemed like a longshot, y'know?" 
"Billy," you started, not sure where to go from there. There was so much you wanted to ask him. Where was he? Was he okay? Was he alive? Were you going crazy? Instead, you only managed one word. "How?" 
There was a chuckle, dark and raspy, broken by more static. "Fucked if I know. Wherever I am...it's dark. And cold," he added, his voice shaky. "It looks just like Hawkins." 
"Billy, are you okay? Are you hurt?"  
"I don't...I don't know. I feel like shit, but I'm still here. Been throwing up, though. Lots of this black shit that tastes like death. It moves," he added with an incredulous laugh. "And then it just wriggles away and disappears." 
"Where are you?" You asked, your mind trying to process everything. If you could figure out how to get to him, then maybe you could save him.  
"I don't know," he answered, confusion in his tone. "It looks like home. I'm even right here in the living room. Sittin' on this filthy fuckin' couch and talking to you on the phone. But you're not here." 
You couldn't help looking around the room, searching for a sign of Billy. If he was here and you were here, then why couldn't you see him?  
"But I'm not the only one here. There's something else. I think he...he wants to use me again. He told me that I was the perfect host. That I could get close enough without letting her know. I can feel him looking for me, but I’ve been hiding." 
"Letting who know?" Your hands were shaking and you curled your free one under your thigh, hoping to calm yourself down a bit. You hated the idea of Billy hiding away, terrified and waiting for the inevitable to happen.  
"Her," Billy answered, taking a deep, shuddering breath. "Eleven. He wants her, I think. Wants to kill her. He hates her. I could feel it. There was so much anger." Each sentence was fainter, as if Billy was running out of energy. You knew, instinctively, that the call would come to an end soon. What if this was the last time you heard from Billy? What if you couldn't find him in time? 
"Billy..." You didn't know what to say. You needed answers, but you didn't know how to get them. "How can I find you?" 
"I--I don't know," the static was growing louder, nearly drowning out his voice. "I thought I was done for, when I stepped between her and it. I accepted it. I was a shitty human being, but at least I did something good at the end. But it wasn't the end. I woke up here, wherever that is. It looks just like home," his voice broke on the last word and you heard him take a shaky breath. "I don't know how much longer I have." 
"Please," you begged, leaning forward on the couch, as if you could reach out and touch him. "Please don't leave me. Not again." You hated hearing Billy talk about himself like that. “You weren’t a shitty person,” you assured him. “You’re brave and loyal and thoughtful.” You let out a broken laugh, clutching the receiver tightly, your only lifeline to Billy. “You’re family,” you whispered, “And I’m not planning on losing you any time soon. Never, if I could help it.” 
"I can't help it," Billy offered with a defeated laugh. "Here, it's like you're the ghost. I can feel echoes of you everywhere. There's people and voices, but I can't quite reach through. I'm not strong enough. I can feel myself slipping. Time just comes in flashes now. I’ve been sleeping a lot." 
"Billy," you faltered for a moment, struggling to breathe. You didn't know what to do. You felt so helpless in that moment, you couldn't even begin to imagine what Billy was feeling. Because at least you were on this side, with people and your loved ones and Steve. You couldn't have survived this without Steve, but Billy was going through this all alone. Trapped in some nightmare world with a monster. He said the monster wanted to use him again, but you didn't plan on letting that happen. Not while you were around. "I'll find you, okay? No matter what. Just hold on, okay? Hold on for me. I’m coming." 
"Can't promise that," Billy sighed, his voice fading in and out, replaced by static. You weren’t sure if he was talking about himself or you, and it hurt even more to think that he doubted you would find him in time.  
"Billy, I--" you cut yourself off, not sure if you could say the words. They seemed so final, but you needed him to know. "I love you," you told him, pouring in the warmth and affection you felt for him. He was the brother you never really asked for, but needed all the same. You'd go to Hell and back for him and that was what you planned to do.  
"I know," Billy whispered before the crackle over the line drowned out everything else. You heard a beeping noise before the line went dead, the dial tone an unwelcome sound in your ear.  
"Fucker," you breathed, a reluctant smile tugging at your lips. Even when you felt like you were going to fall apart, Billy knew how to pull you back together.  
You weren't sure how long you sat on the couch, phone receiver clutched in your hand, held to your ear. You weren't sure if it was all a wistful dream or if maybe you were really asleep upstairs. You longed to hear a word from Billy again, letting you know that he was still there. He was stuck in a mirror world that was decaying and rotten, but Billy was very much alive. There was hope, a small little fire of it, that took root in your chest. You couldn't move, you wouldn't, until you were sure that this wasn't all just a fantasy.  
"Y/N?" You glanced quickly at the phone in your hand, but there was still only a dial tone to greet you. Your eyes moved to find Steve standing in the doorway of the living room, concern in his expression.  
"Steve? What's going on?" 
Steve moved to your side, cautious and unhurried, as if he was worried he was going to spook you. "I woke up and you were gone." The 'again' went unsaid, but from the fear in his eyes, you knew he was expecting you to be halfway to the mall by now.  
“I--,” you started, frowning at Steve, unsure and confused. You felt like you were being roused from a doze, thoughts foggy and distant. “What am I doing here?” 
"You tell me," Steve said, finally sitting down beside you. "Phone call?" He asked, nodding towards the receiver in your hand.  
You had almost forgotten about it, the dial tone so familiar to you by now that you could easily ignore it, letting it lull you into a daze. You forced yourself to put the receiver back in the cradle, trying to push away the inane feeling of betrayal you felt for finally hanging up.  
"He called me," you found yourself saying, looking at Steve.  
Steve's brow furrowed in confusion, before his eyes widened in understanding. "Billy?" 
You nodded your head, shooting a longing look at the phone. "He called me. He told me..." you trailed off, tears beginning to well in your eyes. You drew in a shuddering breath, grateful when Steve's hand found yours. He laced his fingers through yours, squeezing your hand in his grip.  
"Hey," he whispered, pulling your attention to him. "It's okay, alright. Just take a deep breath. We've got the time." 
You shook your head, not sure you did have the time, but unable to voice that concern. You followed Steve's advice, mirroring the deep breaths he drew for you, and then letting them out. Your hands stopped shaking and you felt like you could finally think with Steve there to carry you through your fears.  
"He said he was in a place that's like home, but it's cold. It's like home," you repeated, thinking over everything you had learned the day before. You were sure, more than anything, that Billy was in the Upside Down. How, you didn't know, but you couldn't deny the truth any longer. Even if it didn't make sense, it was real.  
"Steve," you started, finally drawing from your thoughts, glad that Steve was willing to wait for you. "Billy's alive," you whispered, not willing to speak too loudly and shatter the moment between the two of you. "He's in the Upside Down." 
"But--" 
You shook your head, not willing to let Steve poke any holes in your theory. Not when you knew it had to be true. Not when it was the only hope you had. "We have to call Max," you told him, a hundred different plans trying to form in your mind. "And the others. They have to know," you insisted. "We have to--to figure out how to get him out of there. We've got to make a plan." 
"But the gate is closed, isn't it? I mean, that's why Hopper died. They closed the gate, so how could we possibly save him?" 
You shook your head, not that far into your plan. "I don't know," you sighed, leaning over to rest your head on Steve's shoulder. "I don't think he has much longer, though. He said that something's after him," you admitted with a shiver, glad when Steve wrapped his arm around your shoulders, pulling you in closer to his side.  
"If there's a gate still open in Hawkins..." Steve trailed off, not able to finish his thought.  
You knew what he was thinking. If there was a gate still open, then everyone was still in danger. Maybe Hopper died in vain or maybe there was always going to be danger in Hawkins. Either way, it meant that you might still be able to save Billy.  
You thought of the phone call, Billy reaching out to you from the other side. You thought of the knocks on your bedroom door and Billy yelling for you to hear him, only for it to barely echo into your side. You thought of sleepwalking to the mall, tugged there by a feeling, a certainty that you would find what you were looking for there.  
"The mall," you blurted, suddenly sure that it held all the answers. "It's got to be the mall. Maybe there's something there."  
Steve watched you for a moment before he nodded his head. He glanced at the clock on the living room wall before he moved to stand up. "Well, it's just a little past five in the morning," he sighed, holding a hand out to help you off the couch. "Let's see how many of those little shits we can wake up." 
"Thank you," you whispered, pulling Steve closer to you once you were standing. You brushed your lips against his, breathing him in for a moment. Steve was your safe place. When his arms wrapped around you and you let your head rest on his shoulder, you could forget for just a moment that you were about to try to delve into the darkest recesses of what Hawkins had to offer. It didn't seem so bad knowing that Steve was going to be with you every step of the way. You knew he wouldn’t let you take one step towards danger without him tagging along to watch your back.  
"I've got you," Steve promised, pressing a kiss to your forehead. "I've always got you." 
You let yourself pull away from Steve, managing a smile just for him. "I know," you told him, trusting Steve completely.  
If you were going to fall down the rabbit hole to save your best friend, then Steve was going to follow you.  
"Let's call the others," Steve said, breaking the moment. "They'll want to hear about this." 
"Yeah," you agreed, letting yourself step out of Steve's hold. "I guess it's time to get this show on the road." 
taglist: @fangeekkk @outoftheregular @thebossiswrongasrain
boys like you taglist: @artsymaddie @lolychu @daddystevee @chloe-skywalker @witchcraftandwit @live-at-the-rainbow @xroselights @alexloveskili @mayleenmaybank1 @writingsbyleah
22 notes · View notes
Text
The Adventures of Garl and Odra Manyboots- A Declined Confession
Prev.
“So… you see? I’ve never fallen in love with a client before, but you’re different from all the others. I love you Garl. Please… won’t you love me too?”
The deafening silence coming from Gemlyl’s room was all the answer that Besh needed, even if the dwarf was still waiting with baited breath. Besh hadn’t intended on listening in, but she was bringing Gemlyl her new gown from the tailor’s, and had paused when she realized that Gemlyl was with a client.
“Garl? Garl, please say something.”
The gargoyle sighed and Besh winced.
“Fine. I won’t be seeing you again, Gemlyl.”
“Wha- why!?”
Shadows moved from under the door and Besh ducked to the side, praying that neither Garl or Gemlyl would leave the room.
“Because I don’t love you. For me, this is transactional. It’s not about love. It’s about the sex. I’m sorry you got confused, but I’m not going to pretend this is more than that.”
“But-what- you’re so-”
“Gentle?” Garl snorted. “Gemlyl, you’re sweet, but you’re not bright. If I’m not gentle, I’ll literally fuck you to death. I’m made of rock. I have to be gentle. And I like it when the lady who is taking my company enjoys herself too. It has nothing to do with falling in love with you.”
Silence. Besh heard Gemlyl sniffle.
“Don’t… don’t cry. Please stop crying.”
“How can you be so cold?”
“Because I really don’t care about you that way. And your tears aren’t going to change that. You’ll figure out quick enough that you loving me was a mistake, and you’ll find someone else. Probably someone as boorish and hopelessly romantic as you are.”
“You- you bastard!”
“See, you’re already figuring it out. Everyone falls in love with someone they shouldn’t at least once. And in your case, it was a major fuck up because this is your job. I paid you for a service. Don’t get soft because of it. Goodbye, Gemlyl.”
Besh cussed as she ducked into the bordering hallway, Gemlyl’s door swinging open and the dwarf fleeing while sobbing her eyes out. Garl followed, sighing again and pinching the bridge of his nose before turning towards the hiding half orc. “How much of that did you hear?” he asked.
Besh slowly peeked her head around the corner. “… Enough. How often does that happen?” she asked.
“Not too often. Often enough that it gets irritating.” Garl shifted his weight between his feet before gesturing to the dress Besh was holding. “Not for you, I’m guessing.”
“Oh, it’s for Gemlyl. Maybe it’ll make her feel better once she comes back.” Besh glanced down at the dress. “So… that’s how you handle love confessions then. Just- straight to the point, shoot them down.”
“How old are you, Besh?”
“Pardon?” Besh frowned. “I’m twenty. What does that-”
“When you get a bit older, you’ll get it. Better to just-” Garl drew a line across his throat with his finger. “Cut it off before it gets worse. It probably hurts, but it’s better than leading them on, don’t you think?”
Besh bit the inside of her lip before nodding. “I guess. You’ve never fallen in love then? Had your heart beat a little faster because of a girl?” she asked.
“… No. Don’t think I ever will either.”
Garl affectionately patted Besh on the shoulder. “Don’t make the same mistake she did,” he said before he headed for the stairs.
Besh took a deep breath to calm her rushing heart before she went into Gemlyl’s room to hang up the dress.
He made it sound so easy, not falling in love. But it was a lot harder when he stroked your hair when you were all tangled up with each other, his little love bites that left bruises Besh never wished would fade…. But he was right.
Besh set the dress up before heading back to her own room. She didn’t have any other clients booked for today, and really, she wasn’t sure if she was in a good headspace to see them. You weren’t very good at being entertainment if your mind was thinking about another man. Which she definitely was.
Don’t fall in love. Don’t fall in love.
And whatever you do, don’t tell him. Otherwise you’ll lose him for good.
Next
1 note · View note
anikabooker · 1 month ago
Text
There was very little he could do, that could surprise her. Reid was like a book, one of those black and white soft ones, for newborns. No text — just pictures easy enough to register by a baby, or a very stupid child. So she averted her eyes, let them linger on anything sobering (not him) and took that as a match point. At least until he flew that tennis ball back, and it hit her right in between the eyes. Did he really fucking say that? Somehow having this come out of his mouth made her feel nauseaus, made her wrinckle her nose in slight disgust. Anika stared at him, like he'd said the dumbest thing he could think of. Like he'd grown a second head on his shoulders and it was saying the most ridiculous things. "Fuck, you're a nerd." she laughed, a little too loud, but he deserved all of it. Like she was going to get caught with any member of his family.
She moved fast, always a few steps ahead of him, unafraid of the obsticles laying around like lone scooters and bags of trash and someone's old sneekers. The scariest thing might have been that lingering touch of a hand on her back, like a safety net she could lean into, if needed. Not that she would, even if the ground split open before her and forced her feet back. But it felt as nice, as it was frightning.
And behind her, he was apologising and probably offering drunken half-smiles, she couldn't see but she assumed it was the type of smile that had him named the nicer one, of the two residing at apartment 02, by their upstairs neighbours. She remembered opening the door, after a series of persistant, very annoying knocks, and being met with a woman and a question: Where's the nice one?
She never cared for people. It was probably why people never cared for her either. Anika turned slightly to the side, and whispered. "Well, I don't care what some people do." as she was sure, he already knew, and didn't need anymore reminders. "I can go bang on the door of those assholes upsta— "
His arm snaked around her waist, and pulled her back before she could fall face flat into the stairs. Anika was suddenly too aware of the way his scent wafled up and cradled her face like hands. She blinked once, twice like she had gone mute. Oh God. She stumbled backwards so goddamn quick, it almost mimmicked the speed with which he caught her. "That was very, uh — fast." and then a quiet, barely audible "thanks" and a hand snatching up the bottle from him. She wished he'd let her crack her fucking head open. The image of that causin a series of laughs to spill past her lips, as she climbed the stairs to their apartment. The bottle was quickly open and already pouring into her mouth, like she was a parched man in the middle of the desert. "Eenie, meenie — " she began, fingers tracing over each of the doors.
Tumblr media
"Hey — which one was ours?" a beat. "Actually, I don't care." then she sat down on the floor, with her back to the wall.
Reid puffs out a breath, knowing she's screwing around now (Not literally, thank fuck). He puts a hand over his chest, mocking: "I feel for you, that really must suck," The pair of them dodge the sharp blades of what reality looks like; his father smeared by his sister's words, the one that he's not seen in almost a decade. The one who told the world he was dead and simultaneously gave up on the family he had left. He wonders if he and Book still talk, now that their children are peeking out of the shadows. Or if like Reid they bury their pain until it spills over into something awful. Another mouthful of whiskey; now it's just sad that he's just drinking alone, drowning monstrous things that resemble that awfulness.
He bites his tongue for a while after because she's staring at him, in the fading dark outside of Vielview, halo'd in cobwebbed light above their heads. A trying smile on his lips that has him waiting for those formidable words — you're doing it again. But this time, she's watching him at the doorway too, and he's searching the forest of her eyes; tall trees of veiny oaks, shrouded in shrubbery, hiding the woodland from all who might want to peek a little closer to the deep emerald of her gaze. He knows how people might get lost in them now.
"Incredibly jealous," Deadpan, matter of fact. He'd forgotten they were still talking about his dad. And his grin turns a little wry because no matter how drunk he is, the whiskey is acidic on his tongue at the thought. He knows they're joking — but Reid's paving the path early if she's going to make jokes that stab him with a moth-shaped dagger: "Don't get the habit of calling me daddy, you do you, princess." He isn't about to go find Book or make some horrendous joke in retaliation either. If he could, he might have had a nasty part of him want to compel this conversation away. But Anika can suffer with him, it's her fault they're here.
The sun might let him actually dust away from this entire moment if she takes any longer and her kick has him straightening off the frame and feigning a pained: "Ouch." in response. Hardly damaging, with socked feet. Yet he's moving forwards — always ready to catch the potential fall — when she's falling through the door to the apartment block. Reid chuckles, holding the door open so she can gather herself as he sees the heads peering out of their apartments. Ah.
Tumblr media
Anika's in fight mode, already. And Halstead's sighing, kicking shut the door whilst a hand that's free of booze reaches for the small of her back and urges her through the ground floor corridor. The lift's still out of service. So, the stairwell door is halfway down, they've only got to make twenty metres, probably. "C'mon," It's a grumble-slur as he's almost tripped over some scooter in the corridor. "Some people sleep at night," Not like them.
It's funny, but, they don't need to piss off the neighbours more than they already do. Reid's half-muttering drunk apologies as they pass, wavering them off as he focuses on making sure Booker hasn't drawn her pistol, or his, for that matter.
They're both falling through the door to the stairwell. Instinct drives him forwards and there's the catch, arms that capture Anika in the briefest reach around. It stops them both from slapping the ground, chest rumbling with unspent amusement. Reid straightens them, dragging his jacket back over her shoulders before it might fall, then steps back like he's gotten too close. Tongue poking his teeth, he holds up the part-emptied bottle, faux proud "Saved the most important thing."
22 notes · View notes
evilkaeya · 2 years ago
Note
Thoughts on Wayne being unsure/suspicious of Steve’s friendship and eventual relationship with Eddie because how can this rich kid be doing anything but slumming or angling for free drugs? And how he comes around on the Harrington kid
Oh he gets very suspicious when he comes home one day and sees Steve Harrington walking out of his nephew's room. You can't blame him, it's the Harrington kid. Wayne knows his father for his reputation as an absolute asshat. Of course he didn’t think of his son as any better.
Wayne heard about Steve from Eddie. Mostly about his reputation at Hawkins High as the party king and how he never usually participated in bullying but stood and watched when his friends ganged up on some poor kid.
Wayne thought he was right for assuming the Harrington kid was awful as well.
Until Eddie got falsely accused of murder, Hawkins got split in half and people from government in black suits showed up at his door and gave them a new place to stay. Wayne knew the cracks on the ground weren’t caused by ‘earthquakes’ but he decided not to question it. He was old enough, he didn’t need to worry about anything other than his health and his nephew.
And this is where the worry came in. Steve Harrington, along with two girlies his age and a bunch of kids showed up to help him and Eddie move into the apartment. He was happy to see that his nephew had such nice friends, sure, but Steve? The same Steve Eddie couldn’t stand until a few weeks ago? What was he doing here, helping them move the couch and making tea for everyone?
Wayne watched them. Watched them talk and bicker and laugh. Watched Steve help Eddie tie his hair while his hands were full. Watched Eddie smile at the boy like he was the world he wished to hold in his hands.
This was not the same Steve he heard about. No, something must have happened while he was missing and now Eddie was ‘close friends’ with the former king of Hawkins (Eddie told him that he’d changed. That he was now a ‘sweet mother of seven’. Wayne didn’t know what to make of that.) 
So yeah he sees Steve walk out of Eddie’s room in a black shirt, Eddie’s shirt, and he can’t help but worry. Worry that they’re moving too fast. Worry that Steve might hurt Eddie, that he might lose his boy again.
“Uh- hi, I came to pick this up uh-” Steve said, holding up a book- Lord of the Rings? “Eddie likes this book so I thought I should read it? But I don’t have the book and he said I can borrow his and gave me his house key so that I can get it myself. Oh, it’s because he’s with the kids right now so I came to- yeah.”
‘He’s rambling. Like that Buckley kid.’  Wayne thinks, ‘well, no time like now to interrogate your nephew’s ‘possible’ boyfriend.’
But Steve is already turning to leave, “I’ll- get going.”
“Hey kid,” he stops him when they’re out of the door. Steve faces him once again, down the porch stairs. “I’ll ask you this once,” he says and hopes he sounds intimidating enough, “what’s your intentions with my boy?”
Steve, in front of him, turns all shades of blue.
“My uh- my intentions?”
“Yeah, hope you know what the word means.”
“No, I do, I’m just- surprised is all,” the boy says sheepishly.
“So?”
“Eddie is- he is-” he struggles to get the word out and that’s fine. Wayne has time. “Look, I- I know you care a lot about him so I’ll be straightforward with you.”
“The thing is- I’ve gotten my heart broken before. Big time. I really loved her but she didn’t feel the same. I wasn’t the greatest boyfriend either you know, I messed up and she- she called me bullshit. Thought I’d never recover from it. Almost Swore to myself I’d never fall in love again.”
He pauses and Wayne waits.
“Until he came along. Until I saw him and got to know him,” Steve says, voice suddenly confident, “and- and I don’t think I mind risking my heart again. If- if it’s for him.”
Well, that wasn’t the answer he was expecting. Steve Harrington was full of surprises.
Wayne smiles.
“Take care of him for me, would ya?”
“Yeah, of course I-” he says, “do I have your approval?”
Wayne laughs, “yeah kid you do.”
“Great!” Steve exclaims, his voice an octave higher and he clears his throat, “great, uh- that’s great, uhm- thanks,” he nods to himself, “yeah I’m gonna go now.”
“See ya around Steve.”
Wayne stops before closing the door and watches Steve stride back to his car. He stops in front of it, yells ‘YES’ and throws his fist in the air like he’d just won a very tough game.
The brunet then turns and their eyes meet. The shock is apparent on his face, Wayne can see it even from here. He decides to give him a thumbs up, the poor boy looks like he’s going to combust any moment. Steve sheepishly smiles back before quickly getting into the car and driving off.
Wayne thinks he doesn’t need to be that hard on the boy.
A/N: I know this is bad and I’m so sorry for answering this so late. Haven’t been in my writing groove lately </3
345 notes · View notes
i-arch-my-backula · 3 years ago
Text
Insomnia: Poly! Sinclair brothers x gn reader
I have very bad issues with sleep. The main one being insomnia. I’ve tried over the counter sleep aids but they barely do anything anymore. I just can’t get tired at night. I’m writing this for comfort and hopefully if anyone else who finds this has trouble falling asleep can enjoy it too. I’m not trying to romanticize sleep issues either. If I could chose to not almost pull an all nighter every night a literally be in fear of having to fall asleep I would. 
Warnings: Strong language
God what time is it now? You check you clock on your nightstand. ‘2:30′ it reads. God you thought tonight would be the night you could get some sleep. You were so greatful to fall asleep at 11 that night. But now you’ve been awake for almost an hour and nothing can help. You groan as you sit up. You know what you’re gonna have to do. Stay awake for five more hours until everyone else wakes up and gets started with their day. You can’t stand to be in your room while you have to deal with this crap. You grab a light jacket you borrowed from Lester and grab your lighter. You light the tall skinny candle on the single candelabra and take it’s handle. Carrying this around make you feel like you’re living in the 18 hundreds and you should be wearing a night gown. In reality you’re wearing some shorts and a shirt you make from some fabric you found lying around. You open your bedroom door and walk down the stairs. Golden light guides your way into the living room then into the kitchen. 
You look out at the stary sky. God you wish you could go up into space and never have to worry about any of this shit again. It would be so nice to not have to worry about sleep. You set the candle down on the counter and open the fridge and take out some juice. After pouring yourself a glass you take your candle and enter the living room. You set it on the coffee table and look over the magazines they have. All of them from the 60′s, 70′s and 80′s. You’ve read each of them over 10 times at this point but you can’t turn on the tv so might as well read one again. You can tell a lot of them were Trudy’s. Lots of fashion magazines and makeup ones too. A few sports and car one here and there. When you first went through the box of all of these about a third was old play boy’s. You settle on a fashion magazine from 1962. Looking at the dresses you could easily get it confused with the 50′s. Aside from the bee hive hairdos. 
You like vintage fashion. You wish you could have more fun with the things you wear but at least you have more than one outfit to wear. Unlike the first week you were here. You sip your juice and turn the page. Out of the corner of your eye you find another light glowing. You turn your head and see Vincent walking into the room. He’s shirtless and in sweats. Understandable because the basement is boiling hot. “Hey Vinny. Can’t sleep either huh?” He nods. He’s got a candle in a little mason jar of his own. “Well I’m sorry honey. At least we can keep each other company.” You pat the room next to you and he sits down with you. You move the magazine so he can look at it too. “This is from 1962. The 50′s influence is still bleeding into the style. It really changes in 1963. He nods. You two spend some good time looking over the magazine when you hear footsteps from above. You pray you didn’t wake anyone else up. The footsteps grow louder and you see Lester walk down the stairs. Jonesy following behind him. “Well is it seven already?” You joke. Lester smiles and rubs his eyes. 
“Well darlin I can’t get back to sleep. I heard ya talkin and I wanted to see what yer up to.” You move over and Lester sits next to you on the couch. 
“We’re just looking at magazines right now. I just hope Bo doesn’t wake up. I’m worried to see what he’s gonna be like you know?” They both nod. 
“Bo needs his sleep. He works so much all day.” 
“You two work super hard too. I feel bad for keeping you up.” Vincent shakes his head and turns the page. 
“Yer not keepin us up honey. We can’t sleep neither. We love bein with ya.” You smile and move into Lester’s lap. He wraps his arms around you and you hand the magazine to Vincent. You kiss his cheek and cuddle into him. You feel your eyes shut and your mind calm down. You don’t really notice when Bo comes down stairs too. 
“Y’all planin somethin?” He asks walking to the couch. Vincent turns the page and Lester closes his eyes. 
“We’re just up like you Bo. I think Y/N fell asleep.” Bo sits in the middle of the four of you and puts a hand on your thigh. Lester’s the next to fall asleep. Bo watches Vincent look through the magazine and also falls asleep. Soon enough Vincent takes off his mask and blows out the candles. He sets the mask down on the coffee table and falls asleep, resting his head on Bo’s shoulder. That night you had sweet dreams. When you wake up you feel refreshed. You look at your lovely boyfriends and get up. You walk into the kitchen and look at the clock. ‘7:30′. You get started on a pot of coffee and check the fridge to start breakfast. For the first time in forever you didn’t fear falling asleep last night. You smile and grab some eggs. Today’s gonna be better. 
221 notes · View notes
1101001 · 3 years ago
Text
THE GIRL WHO FLEW DOWN THE STAIRS _
┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈
‘ the story of akashi meeting you and all the events after that made him realize he was falling for you ’
┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈
character .. akashi seijuurou
word count .. 1.3k
tags .. fem!reader who is energetic but also thoughtful and likes to learn (as requested) , lowkey pining? , s h o g i , written from akashi pov , requested by the lovely bean anon <3 
Tumblr media Tumblr media
Akashi’s first impression of you wasn’t anything bad. It wasn’t exactly good either. It was certainly memorable though. ‘The girl who flew down the stairs, knocking him onto the ground, and landing on top of him with a thump’ is how he remembers you. 
The moment was almost cliche. If your eyes had met and lingered on each other, both aware of the position you were in but not moving away, then it possibly would’ve been a scene straight out of some cheesy romance novel. 
Instead, you seemingly bounced straight up upon impact, not even bothering to spare Akashi a second glance. You proceeded to give him a quick apology, running down the next flight of stairs immediately after.
It was definitely one of the odder interactions Akashi had with his fellow students at Rakuzan High, but it amused him nonetheless and made him notice you much more often around campus. Even though you weren’t in any apparent rush anymore, you still radiated this energy that was all bubbly and seemingly ready to burst. 
It brought a small smile on his face every time he saw you, bouncing along hallways without a care in the world, chattering away with your friends. Sure you seemed like the typical happy-go-lucky person, but Akashi couldn’t help but see you as a bit more unique.
Your second interaction with Akashi was an interesting one too, in Akashi’s opinion at least. 
The basketball team had just won a tournament the other day, so Akashi was free this afternoon. He had decided to go challenge some shogi club members to a few games. 
In the middle of one of those games, you walked into the club room.
Akashi didn’t think you were part of the club, and his suspicions were confirmed when another member of the club went to ask if you needed anything. Akashi was definitely not eavesdropping, no he was paying attention to his game (the one he knew he would easily win anyway) when you pulled out an envelope and he happened to overhear you telling the club member that someone asked to meet you. 
Nobody in the room came forward to claim they were the one who sent the letter though. 
After a few awkward, silent moments, you moved to take a seat with some of the other club members. It was an action that surprised Akashi. He figured you would’ve just left because the whole did seem like a waste of time. However, you just sat there asking some club members to teach you how to play. 
Akashi could sense genuine curiosity in you and, needless to say, it intrigued him. It seems like there’s more to the “girl made of energy” than he originally thought.
The clock ticked, and a few rounds later, Akashi decided it was time to head home. Saying his formal goodbyes, he walked out of the clubroom. 
He didn’t expect you to come running after him, almost slamming into him again in the process. 
“You shouldn’t run around school so much, you know. You could end up bumping into people and maybe even hurting them.” The words left Akashi’s lips sounding a lot more teasing and flirtatious than he intended.
You blushed and started rambling out apologies. ‘Cute’ Akashi thought. 
His brain froze. 
Wait. Cute? How-
“Anyway um.. you left your notebook back there…” you said, holding out what was indeed his notebook out towards him.
“Oh…” was all he could say. He rarely forgot his things, especially things as important as his notebook. It seems his mind must’ve been too distracted by... other things. “Thank you L/n-san.”
He saw a slight shock on your face. “You know my name?” 
His brain froze yet again. How was he supposed to answer this question without seeming like a stalker?
“Well yes…” he started before you cut him.
“Didn’t expect the Akashi Seijuurou to know my name.”
He scoffed at that. “I think I’d know the name of the girl who jumped down the stairs and knocked me to the ground.”
“Again, I’m really sorry about that…” you said with a smile, although Akashi could see the guilt that lingered behind your eyes.
“Don’t worry about it,” he quickly said. “I was just…”
He was just what? Flirting? Was he actually flirting? Him. Akashi Seijuurou. Flirting??
“…you know,” he finished quietly.
You didn’t say anything in response but instead looked at him with a peculiar sort of gaze. 
“Um.. hate to make things awkward by asking this but… were you the one who sent me this?” You held up the envelope Akashi saw earlier.
“No, I didn’t.”
“Oh… okay then.” Was it just Akashi’s imagination or did he hear a sliver of disappointment in your tone? “I suppose you don’t know who it is either right?”
He shook his head.
A lot of thoughts rushed through his mind. Did you actually expect him to send you a love letter? Did you hope it was him? 
He sensed you were about to leave though, so before he could regret it, he asked you, “Why do you want to know who sent it anyway?”
Your eyes widened slightly at the question.
“I understand the curiosity and wanting to know who it is but… if they didn’t show up, why are you still waiting?” He clarified.
“Akashi-san, you’ve never confessed to someone have you?”
He gave a slight nod.
“Well, I don’t see why you’d need to,” you mumbled more to yourself than him. Clearing your throat, you continued, “The thing is, confessing takes a lot of courage. And writing this letter asking me to meet them here would’ve taken a whole lot of that courage already. I think that, if they were able to go that far, then I should at least hear them out right?”
That… surprised Akashi. 
“But then again, there’s always a possibility this is just a prank,” you added as an afterthought. 
Unsure of what to say, he just nodded. “It is possible, considering how long you had to wait.”
You smiled, “The wait was fine though. I had fun learning shogi.” 
You actually had fun learning how to play? Looking back, it did seem like you were enjoying yourself… 
It’s strange. Akashi realized just how much his view of you changed in one afternoon. Earlier, you were that bubbly, energetic girl bouncing through the halls. Now, you were this thoughtful and kind person who liked to learn. You also said you had fun playing shogi, which nearly made Akashi’s heart skip a beat.
Oh. 
Oh.
He gets it now. The reason his brain was acting all slow was you. With that thought, everything became clearer. 
Now he wishes that love letter really was a prank.
“Ah Akashi-san, I think I have to go home soon,” you said, holding up your phone. “You’re heading out too right? Wanna walk with me?”
He blinked in surprise but quickly agreed.
“Great, just let me get my things first-” And with that you rushed back into the club room.
Akashi stood staring at the empty hallway, still caught up in his thoughts and trying to process what just happened between you two just a few seconds ago.
When you came back out with your things, he couldn’t help but smile softly. The two of you fell into conversation easily, and by the time you walked out of the school gates, you were still in a talk that showed no signs of nearing an end.
He wanted to continue walking and talking like this, but there was a car and a driver waiting for him in the exact opposite direction of where you were headed.
“Well, goodbye then L/n-san,” he said, hoping the reluctance wasn’t obvious.
You smiled in response. “Goodbye Akashi-san. It was nice talking to you.”
With that the two of you went your separate ways. Throughout the car ride home, Akashi could think of nothing but you. It would seem… he has taken quite the liking to you.
He isn’t sure what’ll happen next, but he’s looking forward to seeing you again and hopefully, talking more with you too.
Tumblr media
. . .
note .. THIS CAME OUT LONGER THAN ORIGINALLY INTENDED but anyway i actually enjoyed writing this,,, yk all the stuff potentially going thru akashi’s mind when he has a crush intrigues me and uhh i hope u guys liked this and if u do PLS LMK WHAT U THINK !! it would legit mean the world if u guys did <3
613 notes · View notes
rickmandowneyjr · 3 years ago
Text
Cuts to Cope
Angst, fluff Pairing: Severus Snape and Student!Reader (platonic) Warning: talk of self-harm, mentions of character's death Word Count: 2348 A/N: This is a little piece I wrote a while ago but didn't know if I should post or not. After re-doing certain bits, I decided to upload it. Hope it's not too difficult to read. As always, the ending is a little abrupt and not too detailed, leaving it sort of up to y'all as well :) Sorry if there are any typos (I only ever get the time to write when it's quite late nowadays)
Tumblr media
Yet another day at Hogwarts - waking up at 6:30 am, showering, getting dressed in your robes, and heading to breakfast. Wishing everyone you passed a good morning, wearing your signature smile as you did.
You were a 7th year, one of the few returning ones after last year's incident with Cedric Diggory. He'd been your best friend, or at least that's what people thought. Cedric Diggory and you had been dating for the last 7 months before his death. You didn't want anyone knowing because being star students meant eyes prying into every aspect of your relationship.
People praised you, a model student and now, prefect, who set an example. An example of how to be strong and cope no matter what life threw at you. Little did they know, you harboured a little secret. A dark, horrifying, and disturbing secret that would never let anyone look at you the same way if they ever found out.
Your first class for the day was Potions. You were a brilliant student, especially at Potions, yet Snape still had something against you. You didn't take it personally, though; he wasn't really fond of anyone. You walked into class, taking your regular seat at the front. Snape walked into class a little while later, slamming the door behind him, commanding everyone's attention.
"Turn to page 420," he drawled. You opened the book to find the recipe for Amortentia. Your heart felt a tug at the name of the love potion, never having been able to find out the answers with Cedric.
Snape's deep voice brought your focus back to class as he said, "Since it takes a week to brew, I've already completed most of the process. All you need to do is the last day's work," making the class sigh with relief. "However," he continued, "The last day of brewing is crucial and not easy. So, I expect your attention to be fully on the task at hand."
You began brewing the potion, following the steps perfectly. Snape sat down to grade papers as the class worked. He looked at you and said, "Ms. [L/N], roll up your sleeves while you work. I'd hate for there to be mishaps in my class because of one student's carelessness."
You hesitated, but then did as asked. You weren't the best at wandless magic but had made sure to perfect this spell solely for such instances. As you rolled your sleeves, you subtly waved your hand over your forearms, mumbling, "Illusiont," and casting the disillusionment charm.
You saw Snape narrow his eyes at you and panicked for a second before you saw him shake his head and return to grading. Breathing a sigh of relief, you returned to the task at hand and continued brewing.
After a while, you'd finished, and were the first one to have done so. Snape walked over to your desk and took a whiff of the potion, raising an eyebrow before giving you a single nod of approval, letting you know that it was perfect. Once everyone was done, he walked around, starting at the back, and asked everyone to announce what they smelled. You hadn't smelled your Amortentia yet and hadn't planned on doing so either, feeling quite relieved when Snape hadn't asked that question earlier.
Your heart rate quickened as you began to worry about how your body and mind would react to smelling it. You couldn't do it last year, since the Triwizard tournament had led to a bunch of classes being cancelled. As you thought about how excited you had been at the prospect of sharing the experience with Cedric, Snape's voice pulled you back to your potions class.
"Ms. [L/N]."
"Yes, sir?"
He rolled his eyes in annoyance. "What. Do. You. Smell," he spoke, irritation evident in every word.
You swallowed hard as you leaned forward to inhale the scent. Your pupils dilated, your heartbeat quickened and your knees threatened to give out at the all-too-familiar fragrance. Your throat went dry as you stopped the tears from forming.
"Well? We haven't got all day, class is to be dismissed soon." He raised an eyebrow at you, asking you to hurry up since you were the last one.
With every ounce of energy, you calmed yourself and stopped your voice from wavering. "Old books, butterscotch and... vanilla," you sighed. Your breathing was erratic and you knew you needed to get out of class and get to the abandoned girls' washroom.
As if on cue, the bell rang, dismissing the class. Snape gave you an odd look and was about to ask you what was wrong but you had already gathered your belongings and were marching out the door. He decided to follow you since he'd never seen you act like that before and was wondering what had happened to you all of a sudden.
You made your way up the stairs, hurrying before you had a breakdown in the middle of the hallway. As you reached the washroom, you started rummaging through your bag since the hallway was empty. You took the small blade that you carried around out, pushing the door to the bathroom open.
Snape's POV
I followed her out of the classroom. Though not my favourite, [Y/N] was an incredible witch and this wasn't normal behaviour for her. She'd marched out before I had even dismissed class which concerned me even more, given her usually 'perfect' behaviour. She paced through the hallways and up the stairs so fast that I could've sworn she was moving around faster than I did on a normal basis. There was an urgency in her stride and I don't know why, but it concerned me.
She finally turned into the hallway leading to the girls' washroom on the third floor, which was odd. No one used this, as far as I was aware. I was a little embarrassed, considering I'd just followed a young girl to a washroom. In an isolated area, at that. I swear I never would've imagined myself going even further and following her in, but what I'd seen had shocked and concerned me enough to do just that.
End of Snape's POV
As you entered the bathroom, you had missed Snape, whose eyes were wide with shock. He couldn't believe what he'd seen. [Y/N] [L/N], the golden girl of Hogwarts, had just walked into an abandoned washroom after pulling out a blade from her bag. Not wanting to jump to any conclusions, he rushed in, wanting to confirm what his eyes had just seen.
As you were about to enter a stall, the door to the bathroom, swung open, making you jump. You hid the blade by making a fist, unintentionally cutting into your palm. You winced at the unexpected pain but didn't let it show.
You turned to face Professor Snape, and he was eyeing your hand. 'There's no way he saw it, is there?' you thought.
"Ms. [L/N], care to show me your hands?"
You panicked. He knew. You tried to divert his attention. "Sir, this is the girls' washroom."
"I'm aware," he stated. "Now... Hands," he said as he glared at you, letting you know that he wouldn't fall for any attempts to change the subject.
You sighed and opened your hands, and saw his gaze soften. He walked to you taking your hand in his as he gently pulled the razor out. You winced as it came out, knowing this would impair you for the rest of your classes.
"What were you thinking?!" He scolded, startling you. He reached for your arm, rolling up your sleeves once again and muttered, "Finite."
The scars on your arms started showing up and you couldn't do anything but look away, your eyes resting anywhere but his gaze.
"So that was the Disillusionment Charm I heard you use, earlier."
You stayed silent, still refusing to meet his eyes. Of all the professors, it had to be him. Sure, he wasn't fond of you, but you had immense respect for the man, and to let him see you in this light... it took every bit of you to not lose your composure.
"Look at me," he said.
You turned to face him. His usually cold eyes showed too much concern and the uncharacteristic response from the potions master was proving to be a lot to handle. Tears stung your eyes as he stared at you.
"Why?" He asked, his voice so genuine that you couldn't help but let your emotions spill, creating a mess that you couldn't be bothered to care about anymore.
"I can't do this anymore," you sniffled. "I don't want to. He was everything to me and it just hurts so much."
"Who?"
"Cedric."
"Ah, yes. I'm aware you and Mr. Diggory were best friends. I'm sorry, [Y/N]."
"No," you said, finally being able to talk to someone about it. "He was my boyfriend. And... I never got to tell him I loved him... because I wasn't sure. Today just made it worse when I smelled him in my Amortentia. It confirmed that I did and I never got to say it." You were sobbing now, not caring what you looked like, what a mess you probably were, or what Snape was thinking of you and your confession.
You felt him awkwardly wrap his arms around you as he pulled your head to his chest. Your cries got louder and your wails of agony echoed in the empty washroom as your hands clutched the fabric of his robes. The feeling of someone comforting you was overwhelming. You'd always had to keep up this image of a perfect student, reliable friend, someone who could never have such horrifying tendencies.
Even then, as you cried out loud, your instinct made you bury your face in his chest, muffling the 'ugly' sobs. Snape's heart broke as your thoughts flooded his mind. As you struggled to breathe, he turned your head slightly, making you audible again. He didn't hush you; just stroked your hair as your tears soaked his robes.
It took a while, but you finally calmed down, your sobs reducing to soft whimpers before they died out entirely. Your throat was sore, and lips, chapped from all the crying. Your eyes were red and puffy, and the reality of the situation finally came crashing down on you.
Your secret was out. More than one, at that. One of the professors knew, and the strictest one too. You had just spent Merlin knows how long crying into his chest, which was now soaked with your tears.
"I'm sorry," you mumbled, your voice, hoarse. "Your robes are all wet now," you said, trying to move away.
"That's the least of my worries right now," he said, keeping your head in place as he continued, "I understand what you're going through. Better than you'd know." It sounded like it was painful for him to talk about it, the tone of his voice giving the vulnerability away. "But this is not the way to deal with it," he said as rubbed your back.
"Does it go away?"
"I'll be honest," he sighed. "It does get lesser with time if you allow yourself to heal. However, it never goes away entirely. A part of you will always love and miss him. I'm sorry," he said.
"No, I'm glad. I don't want to forget him. Or my love for him. Cedric Diggory was and will always be - my first love."
You finally pulled away from his chest and looked him in the eyes as he gave you a gentle smile. You managed to muster a somber one and sighed.
"Do any of your friends know?"
"Merlin, no!"
"Why not? They're your friends. They could-"
"I can't have this getting out. Everyone will-"
"Who cares what people think?" He raised his voice. It was silent for a while before he sighed and spoke again.
"[Y/N], I want you to promise me something."
You knew what was coming. You gulped and nodded softly.
"I want you to promise me that you'll stop this. Cedric wouldn't want this for you."
"I know, and I've tried before. It's not that simple-"
"I know," he said, cutting you off. "Which is why, the next time you get the urge to do this, you'll come to me. No matter what the situation might be."
You were surprised at his words. It was incredibly nice of him to offer this to you, and you nodded, accepting his generosity.
"Also," he continued, "Please stop going to such great lengths to please others and worrying about what others think. It's not healthy."
"But-"
"But nothing. Your health is suffering and you can't even bring yourself to tell anyone because you're so busy keeping up this little charade of 'everything is fine'."
You stayed silent. There was truth in his words and you couldn't refute his accusations. You just looked up at him, once again, finding the uncharacteristic concerned look meeting your gaze. Nodding softly, you agreed. How could you not when someone had shown you such consideration and compassion?
A small smile graced his usually stoic face as he helped you up, and you both made your way out of the bathroom. He escorted you back to your dormitories, ensuring you were alright before the two of you parted ways.
The rest of the school year passed and Snape stayed true to his word, and you to yours. Every time you felt the urge to hurt yourself to relieve the pain, you'd find Snape. He was patient and helped you every step of the way. Slowly, but surely, you were able to overcome your urges and also found yourself living for yourself, rather than up to others' expectations.
By the time you graduated, you had overcome the habit and thanked Snape in your graduation speech, never giving away the details as to why. A lot of people had assumed there was something between the two of you, especially since you went to meet him all through the school year, but you didn't let it bother you, because... Who cares what people think, right?
-
P.S. - Sorry I've been a little slow with the writing. My college assignments have started rolling in and I'm currently swamped. Also, I'm working on a little something (announcing it in 2-3 days so make sure to check in lol). Rest assured, I'm slowly and steadily making my way through requests. Thank you for understanding <3
403 notes · View notes
the-bau-quinjet · 4 years ago
Text
One Misunderstanding
Bucky x Reader
Summary: You struggle to fix Bucky's first impression of you. Bucky struggles with his own feelings.
Warnings: angst, Hydra things- like brainwashing and torture, a few curse words, panic attacks, anxiety
Word count: 5609
a/n: this idea came to me very suddenly, but I'm in love with it. Hopefully whatever I just wrote does it justice.
Masterlist
Tumblr media
"Everyone, meet Y/N. She's the newest member of our little group, bringing in a whole new level of hacking and tech skills. Y/N, meet the team." Tony introduced you to everyone, eager to share your skills.
You turned to the group, getting ready to introduce yourself further, but instead tripped. You shrieked as you fell down the small set of stairs you were at the top of.
Sam, being the closest, caught you. "Good thing you've got tech skills." He chuckled as you righted yourself, firmly planting your feet on the ground.
"Haha, yeah. I'm not a big fan of violence." You winced as you said it, wishing you could take it back. You didn't want to get into the reasons as to why you don't like violence.
To your surprise, nobody asked why. You would have guessed they would have questions, but maybe they weren't interested in your past. They all had their own issues to deal with afterall.
"Eh, we don't need anymore people for fighting anyway. Welcome to the team." Steve greeted you warmly, as you would have expected from America's golden boy.
You gratefully shook his hand, glad to not have to talk about anything yet. Unfortunately, you tripped again when you tried to move back, falling into the one and only Bucky Barnes.
His hands steadied you, dryly laughing at your clumsiness. "You really are clumsy."
You did you best to not show how embarrassed you were. You couldn't deny the claim. Unless you were fighting, something you vowed to yourself to never do again, you were clumsy.
Being abducted and tortured by Hydra may have made you a competent fighter, but your aptitude for tripping over nothing never left.
"Right, sorry!" You greeted everyone else quickly, eager to get situated in your room. "I'm just going to unpack everything." You waved as you backed out of the room, bumping into the wall as you left.
-
You had just finished putting away your stuff when you heard a knock on your door.
"Come in!" You figured someone would have questions for you.
Unsurprisingly, Natasha was the one to step into your room. Of everyone there, you expected her to have learned about your past. It comes with the territory of being a spy.
"Hi, I was hoping to talk to you." Her tone was friendly, but clearly she was skeptical of you. Again, you weren't surprised.
"I thought you might. I'm assuming you read my file? Honestly, I thought everyone would." You laughed gently, shaking your head at yourself.
"I did. Your file is pretty bare bones though. I did some extra digging... Not everyone else is as nosy as me." She grinned, already pleased with your openness. "So, why'd you pretend to be clumsy?"
"Oh, it wasn't pretend. I've always been clumsy. When everything happened, and I learned how to fight, I thought my newfound agility would help. Turns out, it didn't. The only times I'm even the slightest bit coordinated are when I'm fighting or training, but I wasn't lying about that either. When I escaped, I promised myself I wouldn't hurt anyone else."
"Why join the Avengers at all then?" She looked curious, still unsure if she could trust you.
"I wanted to help people. I just didn't want to use the skills they gave me to do it. So, I learned how to code, figured I could help behind the scenes."
She smiled, letting down her guard. Clearly it would take some time, but you could easily see the two of you being close friends.
"So, nobody knows about what you went through?" She couldn't help but be curious about your past.
"Nope. I don't talk about it much, but it's not a secret. I'll answer anything you want to know." You smiled, eager to try and make a real friend here.
You spent the next few hours answering every question Natasha could think of. You told her about being abducted and experimented on.
That lead to even more questions, basically boiling down to the fact that you're not a super soldier, but you do have enhanced senses- and seemingly enhanced clumsiness for when you're not using them.
You told her about learning how to fight, and the punishments you would endure if you got it wrong. The two of you bonded over the shared experience.
Finally, you told her about how you escaped. When the Winter Soldier escaped, every Hydra effort possible was made to find him. That included you. Resources were spread thin, trying to cover more areas. It was the perfect opportunity for you to get out.
"Really, I owe my freedom to him. Even if he doesn't know anything about me." You felt the tears in your eyes, too many emotions swirling through you to keep it all in anymore. "Since then, I've learned everything I could about technology and coding, which pretty much brings you up to date."
Before she could ask anymore questions, there was another knock on your door. Quickly wiping the tears from your eyes, you called another "come in!"
Steve poked his head in the door, cautiously looking between you and Nat.
"I've been sent to stop the interrogation." He grinned, stepping farther into the room.
Nat rose from her spot on the bed, kissing him on the cheek while rolling her eyes. "It wasn't an interrogation. We were bonding."
"Yeah, over what?" He chuckled, trying to figure out what the two of you had in common.
Maybe it was the look in your eyes, or maybe Nat just likes knowing more than everyone, but she smiled conspiratorially at you before responding. "Girl stuff, babe. Just girl stuff."
You smiled as the couple left the room, grateful for not having to explain everything again.
-
Over the next few weeks, the team constantly teased you for your clumsiness. Well, not the whole team. Nat knew the truth, so she never said anything. Peter never teased you either, although that is likely due to the teasing he endures as well.
Weirdly enough, you bonded with the kid over it, eventually telling him about your past as well.
Normally you could shake it off. They clearly didn't mean anything by it. Except Bucky.
Whenever he said anything, he stared you down. His eyes felt like they were piercing your soul. You're not sure exactly why, but he didn't seem to like you much.
Which wouldn't be an issue if you didn't have an embarrassing crush on the man.
Really your infatuation started when you first escaped Hydra. His own escape lead to your freedom, so you admired him. When you found out he was working with the Avengers to help people, you admired him even more.
Watching him on missions is really what caused the infatuation to blossom into a full blown crush.
You, however, would adamantly deny that if anyone ever asked. Which is what just happened.
"What?!" You nearly tripped, again, with how quickly you turned to look at Wanda and Nat.
"You heard me." Nat stared at you, a neutral expression on her face. "When are you going to do something about your crush on Barnes."
"I, I don't- I don't have a crush on Bucky." You stuttered, a lackluster job at denying the truth.
"Please, Y/N. It's so obvious!" Wanda joined in.
The three of you hung out a lot around the compound. It was nice to have a support system to lean on when things got hard.
"Well, even if I did, which I'm not saying I do! He doesn't like me. I don't know what I did, but his eyes feel like daggers whenever we're in the same room." You started out strong, but quickly morphed into a sad resignation. It genuinely upset you that Bucky didn't like you.
"I think I might know what that's about..." Wanda bit her lip, immediately feeling guilty at having said anything.
"What!?" You eagerly turned to her, needing answers. You shuffled your way across the room, never fully rising from your seat on the ground.
"I don't know if I should tell you! I'm not even supposed to know, but sometimes his thoughts are really loud!" Her guilt multiplied.
"You have to tell me now! Then I can fix it!" You were practically begging at her feet from your position on the floor.
She looked at Nat, who just shrugged in return. "Not my place, although I would love to hear it."
"Ugh, fine. But you can't tell anyone I told you!" Wanda glared at the two of you, unable to say no to your pouting face. "The first day we all met you, do you remember what you said?"
Your face scrunched as you tried to remember. "I'm not a big fan of violence?"
She nodded, looking at you as if she just told you everything.
"So?" You asked incredulously, unable to follow her train of thought.
She rolled her eyes, having to spell it out for you. "He kind of took that personally..."
Immediately, you sunk completely to the floor. "Oh, god. Fuck! That's not what I meant at all! I just meant I don't personally like using violence! Shit, shit, shit." You continued to mutter to yourself as Nat and Wanda shared a look.
"Why don't you like using violence?" Wanda asked, intrigued by your reaction.
You thought back to your conversation with Nat the first day you got here. You told her it wasn't a secret, it just wasn't something you brought up.
"Can you just look in my head? I don't really wanna explain it, but I want you to know." You asked, glad to share you past with another friend.
Wanda nodded, seemingly doing nothing until realization dawned on her.
"Oh shit." She whispered, not even realizing she said it out loud.
"Yeah." You huffed out a dry laugh.
"Y/N... I'm so sorry." You smiled at her, having worked through most of the trauma already. "You totally have a crush on Barnes though."
That earned a real laugh. "Hey, that's not what you were in there for!"
"It's not my fault! You were thinking it really loudly!"
The three of you laughed together until you sunk back into a pit of despair.
"What do I do? How do I fix this?" You whined, laying back on the ground like a child.
"I think you just need to talk to him. Explain what you meant." Wanda shrugged, unsure of any other advice to offer you.
"She's right. Just talk to him." Nat nodded along as you whined on the floor.
-
After a few days, you finally worked up enough courage to try and talk to Bucky. He had just finished training, so you knew exactly where he'd be: in the kitchen.
Walking in, you were glad to see him pulling ingredients from the fridge.
"Hey Bucky, can I, um, talk to you for a minute?" You stuttered through the words, nervous about what he would say.
He barely looked at you, nodding his head for you to continue.
"I just, I wanted to apologize." You trailed off when his head snapped up.
"For what?" Well shit. How are you supposed to explain this one without ratting out Wanda.
"Oh, well, um... I just thought maybe I said- I did something that upset you. Uh, you just don't seem to like me very much, which is totally cool, you don't have to like me if you don't want to. I just didn't want it to be my fault... Fuck." That went horribly. Taking a deep breath, you started over. "I didn't mean it."
Bucky is looking at you like you have three heads. "Didn't mean what?"
"That I don't like violence."
"So you do... like violence." He'd somehow grown more confused.
"Well, no." You paused, unsure of how to explain yourself.
"Then you did mean it." His soul piercing stare is back.
"I-"
"It's fine, save it. Some people get to choose not to be violent." And with that, he left the kitchen, abandoning his post workout smoothie.
You stared at the doorway, in shock over how poorly that went. You stood there , unaware of the 25 minutes that had passed, trying to figure out how it could've gone better when Steve found you.
"Y/N? What are you doing?"
You didn't hear him, too lost in the memories. Memories of Hydra, forcing you to do things you never wanted to. This happened from time to time if something triggered you into remembering, otherwise you had a handle on your emotions.
"Y/N?" Steve said your name again, concern evident in his voice. He gently laid a hand on your shoulder, trying to get your attention.
Everything happened so fast after that. The feeling of someone's hand on your shoulder caused you to panic. With all the memories of Hydra in your head, your training kicked in instinctually.
You grabbed Steve's arm, pulling him closer to you for better leverage. Before he could question your moves, you flipped him, pinning him to the ground.
The second you made eye contact, you realized what just happened. Horror and regret flashed in your eyes.
In an effort to get off him, you threw yourself backward, knocking into a cart full of pots and pans. The clanging of metal hitting the ground echoed through the small room.
Steve sat up slowly, trying to register the turn of events. You sat in a ball on the floor, tears pooling in your eyes, mumbling apologies over and over again.
Sam, having heard the commotion from the pots and pans, ran into the kitchen ready to fight.
"What- What happened?" He asked in confusion, lowering his arms from their defensive position.
"I don't know." Steve looked at you, still trying to figure it out.
"Y/N?" Sam's voice was gentle, but it still startled you.
You jumped from the ground, rushing to help Steve get up. "I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to. I never wanted to hurt anyone again." Your breathing was picking up, short bursts of air leaving your lungs. Your hands were shaking as you pulled him from the ground.
Your panic increased as you took in their concerned expressions.
"Hey, look at me." Steve's Captain voice, came out, urging you to make eye contact. You followed orders, breathing rapidly, your whole body shaking.
"I'm going to touch you now, is that okay?" His words were gentle, but commanding, causing you to nod in response.
He pulled you into a tight hug, rubbing soothing circles on your back.
You wanted to explain, to tell them what happened, but all that came out was a pitiful "Bucky".
"Do you want me to get Bucky?" Sam asked, trying to understand you.
The idea of Bucky coming back caused your panic to increase. You shook your head rapidly, "No! No no no no no." You kept repeating the word, shaking in Steve's arms.
"Okay! Okay, no Bucky." Sam reassured you, voice calm and soothing.
You’re not sure how long you stood like that. Sam moved around the kitchen, cleaning up the pots and pans you had knocked over.
When your breathing steadied, Steve asked, "Do you want to talk about what happened?"
You nodded, leading the two men to the couch in the adjacent common area. You sat for a minute, unsure of where to start.
"Why don't you just lead us through it all?" Steve suggested, still rubbing your back.
You nodded, grateful for the starting point. "I went to the kitchen to apologize to Bucky."
"What for?" Sam interrupted, already confused.
"Sam! Just let her talk." Steve muttered, slightly annoyed.
"Sorry!" He glared back at Steve before turning to you, "Sorry, please continue."
You couldn't help but laugh at their banter.
"Right, I wanted to apologize for what I said the first day I met you all. I realized how it sounded, so I wanted to try and fix it." You paused, waiting for the recognition to hit them.
It didn't take long. The two men nodded, silently urging you to continue.
"Honestly, Wanda told me that was why he always seems mad at me. You have to know, I never meant for it to come across that way! It's more of a personal, 'I don't want to be violent' than shunning others for doing what's necessary." You took a deep breath, not eager to relive the conversation.
"Anyway, I told him I didn't mean it. I just couldn't explain it right, and he got upset, which makes sense!" You turned to look between them, not wanting them to think you were insulting Bucky in any way. "I don't hold what he did against him. It wasn't his choice, and I completely understand that. I just couldn't put that into words when I was talking to him, and I made everything worse."
Tears popped into your eyes again, upset at what he must be going through. You weren't with Hydra for but a tenth of the time he was, and you didn't endure the same level of brainwashing.
"He said something about some people not being able to choose not to be violent, and then he left. I don't know how long I was standing in the kitchen replaying the conversation, but it brought up bad memories for me." You sighed again, working up the nerve to tell them everything.
"Wanda and Nat already know, but I guess it's your guys's turn. This was so much easier to just have Wanda read my mind." You laughed at your own joke, the two men sharing a concerned look.
"I was taken... by Hydra. They experimented on me, gave me enhanced senses, trained me to fight, and punished me when I did something wrong." Again, tears sprung into your eyes, occasionally falling down your cheeks.
"Why wasn't this in your file?" Steve questioned, more to himself than you.
"I haven't got a clue. I guess nobody knew about me? But, I escaped. They didn't brainwash me like they did Bucky, because I don't have the serum. Or, at least, I think that's why." You shook your head, refocusing on the important parts.
"When every available Hydra agent was tasked with searching for the Winter Soldier, I took it as on opportunity. Their resources were spread thin. I was able to getaway."
You went onto explain your reasoning for joining the Avengers as a tech specialist, trying to convey the same earnestness you did with Nat.
"You can ask Nat or Wanda too. Nat found out day one, Wanda a few days ago." You wiped your tears, hoping they believed you. "Actually, Peter knows too."
"I was stuck in all those memories when you came into the kitchen. I didn't even register that you were in the room, so when you touched me I freaked out. I never meant to hurt you!"
You looked at Steve fearful that he would be upset.
"Y/N, I believe you." You cried tears of relief at his statement, genuinely exhausted from the day. "It's not your fault, and you didn't hurt me. Just caught me off guard. You're surprisingly agile when you want to be." He tried to lighten the mood, glad to hear you laugh.
"Well, I train in the middle of the night sometimes. I- I want to be able to get out if I'm ever forced back there." Your voice was quiet, admitting a secret you hadn't even told Nat.
"We won't let that happen." The sternness of Sam's voice surprised you.
"Thank you." You wiped your tears a final time, looking between the two men. "Now, what do I do about Bucky?" You refocused your energy on fixing your relationship with the super soldier.
"He never would have said what he said if he had known." Steve started the conversation, defending his friend.
"I know. I don't hold it against him, I just wish I could explain. I get so nervous when he looks at me like that." You rambled, too tired to filter your thoughts.
"Like what?" Sam asked, eager for more information to tease Bucky with.
"Huh? Oh, I don't know. Like he can see into my soul." You deadpanned, earning a laugh from both men. "I just want him to like me." You nearly whined, upset by your poor relationship.
"Like you, huh?" Steve grinned. Nat and Wanda chose that exact moment to walk into the room, eagerly joining the conversation.
"Barnes? Did you tell him how you feel?" Wanda squealed with excitement.
You buried your head in your hands, avoiding the knowing looks the four of them were surely sharing. "Not exactly." You gestured to your head, hoping Wanda would figure it out and share with Nat.
"Ooh... It didn't go well, basically Barnes got upset, Y/N flipped Steve and had a panic attack, then told these two everything." Wanda explained to Nat quickly, trying not to make you relive it.
"We need a plan." Nat declared.
"No, I just need to learn how to have a conversation with the man." You rolled your eyes at yourself. "I'll try talking to him again." You went to leave the room, turning around to glare at them. "And none of you can say a word of this to Bucky."
-
Despite you request, Steve still tried to talk to Bucky.
"What's up with you?" Steve questioned, trying to subtly pry into Bucky's thoughts.
"Nothing. Why?" Bucky answered in a questioning tone, trying to figure out Steve's motives.
"I heard you talked to Y/N is all. How'd it go?" He gave up on the subtle approach pretty quickly, knowing Bucky wouldn't answer a question that wasn't asked.
"How did you even hear that, punk?" Bucky deflected.
"Not the point. Answer the question."
"Not great. I messed it up." Bucky sighed, annoyed at himself for barging out of the room. "She said wanted to apologize, that she didn't mean what she said." He ran his hands through his hair, struggling to explain where it all went wrong.
"Would've been fine if I could follow what she was saying. She was rambling about me not liking her, which you and I both know isn't true. Ugh, i've never been mad at her. I'm mad at myself! At Hydra for making me a monster! How could she ever like me if she doesn't like violence? My entire past is violent." He huffed, having worked himself up again.
"You're not a monster, Buck." Steve started gently.
"I know you think that." Steve gave him a pointed glare. "I know, okay? But what does she think?"
"Maybe you should try talking to her. You might be surprised by what you learn." Steve clapped him on the shoulder, trying to reassure him, before leaving the room.
-
Everytime you tried to talk to Bucky, something got in the way. The first time, he was called in for an emergency mission before you even got the word hello out.
The second time, Tony walked into the common area, completely oblivious to the tension, and put on a movie.
The third time, Steve and Nat interrupted you. You were just about to apologize again after an awkward greeting when the elevator doors opened. The sounds of the cheerful laughter and stolen kisses didn't really set the mood for confessing your past with Hydra.
The fourth, and final time, was the most embarrassing.
You walked into the room on a mission. You were going to talk to him, no matter who decided to walk in.
"Bucky, I really need to-" and you tripped on a toy Morgan left out, causing you to tumble to the ground. That would have been embarrassing enough, but there's more.
In your effort to get up, you tripped again, hitting your head on the coffee table, causing you to bleed profusely.
"Shit." You cursed yourself, holding your hand up to your bleeding forehead.
"Are you okay?" Bucky rushed to you from the other side of the table, concerned with the amount of blood spewing from your head.
"Yeah, I'll be fine." Unfortunately, you chose that moment to jokingly reference your past.
Some of the people who tortured you had a sick sense of humor. Whenever they would hit you hard enough to make you bleed, they said something about only having one head. A play on words because of the greek serpent with multiple heads.
"Head wounds bleed a lot, I'm lucky I only have one." You froze instantly, unsure if he would have had a similar experience. Slowly, you looked up in an effort to make eye contact.
Bucky was also frozen in place. Clearly he understood the reference.
"Wh- where did you hear that?" Bucky struggled with his sentence, trying not to flashback to his time at Hydra.
"Oh my god. I'm so so sorry." You instantly started apologizing, trying to backtrack. "I really need to learn when to stop fucking talking." You said more to yourself than him.
"Where did you hear it?" He asked again, putting more power behind his words.
"Um, well, i've been trying to tell you for weeks now, but um, I also kind of, have, um, well, you see-"
"Just spit it out." There was the slightly miffed Bucky you were used to.
"I was taken. By Hydra. 9 years ago. Um, they forced me to learn how to fight. Tortured me if I did anything wrong. Forced me to do things..." You trailed off, realizing you didn't need to give him many details. He has first hand experience.
"Y/N, I-" You cut him off before he could say anything else.
"That's why I don't like using violence. I only know how to do that stuff because they made me learn it. I didn't want to use the skills they gave me." You took a deep, grounding breath.
"I don't blame you for anything you were forced to do. It wasn't your choice. You're not a violent person, and your past actions don't define who you are. You're here to help people. That's what you chose. That's who you are."
You made eye contact before you continued. "I've actually wanted to thank you for the longest time."
"For what?" He was incredulous, wildly caught off guard by everything you've said.
"The only reason I had an opportunity to escape was because 2 years ago, you escaped. If Hydra's resources hadn't been spread so thin trying to find you, I probably would've never got out. So thank you. For being strong enough to fight back."
You smiled at him, still unsure of how he was feeling.
"I... I'm so sorry." To say you were stunned was an understatement. What the hell could he have to be sorry about? Sure he was a little rude, but from your point of view he was completely justified in hating you.
"Bucky, you have no reason to be sorry. You didn't know, and I couldn't get out of my head enough to tell you. You just make me nervous." You clapped a hand over your mouth, shocked at having said what you just said.
You could see his face fall ever so slightly, causing you to jump back into your explanation.
"Not because I'm scared of you or anything! Hell, I could probably take you in a fight." You winked, trying to lighten the mood. It seemed to work, judging by the slight smirk on his face.
"I just, I've looked up to you for so long. Your determination to do good after everything you've been through is really inspiring. It's actually why I wanted to join the Avengers in the first place. I never would have-" You would have kept rambling if he hadn't stopped you.
"Y/N, I am sorry, and I do have reason to be. There's no excuse for what I said to you in the kitchen that day. Even if I didn't know, I threw everything you've been through back in your face. If someone had done that to me, I probably would have had a panic attack." He tried joking, but by the way you froze he could tell he struck a nerve.
"You had a panic attack? I'm so sorry! God, I just left you all alone and-"
It was your turn to cut him off. "Actually, I was kind of frozen in place until Steve touched me and I maybe threw him to the ground... Then I had a panic attack..." You smiled, trying to convey the joke. "So, I wasn't alone. Sam was actually also there. If anything, it made me better friends with both of them because I told them everything. So I have you to thank for that to." You playfully nudged his side.
He ran his hands through his hair, then down his face, clearly trying to deal with his own guilt.
"Hey, don't beat yourself up about it. You didn't know. It happened. We're good now, so we can move on." You smiled, trying to cheer him up.
"How are you so relaxed about all of this? You were tortured for years... I..." He was genuinely curious, trying to find a way to cope with his own pain.
"Well, even before that I always thought therapy could be helpful for me, so I really jumped in full force when I was free. Plus, if you can't joke about something, you haven't really moved on. Some days are harder than others, but I just try to appreciate the people I have now and the good experiences I've been lead to." You kept the tone light, trying not to get too emotional.
He just stared at you for a few minutes, making you questions everything.
"I mean, it's totally different for you though! I was only there for 7 years, you were forced into all that for like 10 times as long. I didn't mean to belittle-"
"I think you inspire me just as much as you say I've inspired you." He cut you off again, a small smile growing on your lips.
"Well, in the spirit of our newfound friendship, can I be totally honest?" You bit your lip, nervous about telling him the truth.
He looked nervous as well, but nodded anyway.
"I kind of, maybe, sort of have a crush on you." You watched his expression carefully, although there was really no need. His face easily gave away his surprise.
"You..." He stuttered, moving his fingers between the two of you. "Me? But, I was so mean!"
"What can I say, I saw through the facade... Well, really Wanda accidentally read your mind and told me why you were so upset around me when her and Nat teamed up to get me to tell you how I feel." You rambled again, realization dawning that you accidentally outed Wanda.
"But you can't tell her I told you that! She didn't mean to! She just said you think really loud sometimes and it's hard not to hear it! She did it to me too actually, I mean I told her she could look in my head so I wouldn't have to explain everything again, I know so lazy, and that's how she confirmed my crush on you." You said it all with wide eyes at a rapid speed, unable to control yourself around Bucky.
You slapped your hands over your mouth, forcing yourself to stop talking. Bucky looked on in amusement, slowly reaching to pull your hands away from your face.
"I won't tell her, if you get dinner with me tonight." He smiled cheekily, relishing in your blush.
"That's a deal I'm willing to make." You reached your arms around his neck, kissing his cheek before running to get ready.
***
Bonus:
Sam whined playfully as he looked at the high scores. "Whose username is 'God is a spoon' and how did they get so good at this game?"
He looked around the room, eying any suspicious candidates. Everyone denied it, throwing out accusations left and right.
It was another of Tony's team bonding nights and he chose VR games on the oculus. Obviously, Beat Saber was a top contender amongst the group.
You walked in with Bucky, unaware of the conversation going on, but immediately joining it.
"Peter! I bet it was him!" You playfully nudged the younger Avenger, having formed a close friendship in the early days. "What am I betting on?" Everyone laughed, happy to see you in a good mood after being so stressed for so long.
"Whose username is 'God is a spoon'." Sam chuckled after filling you in. You and Bucky settled on the couch, cuddling next to each other.
"Oh, that's me. Why?" You looked around curiously, trying to figure out what they wanted. "Is it a weird username? It was actually one of the catchphrase things in Just Dance on the switch, I didn't just think of it." You tried to justify yourself, causing more laughter.
"You?! How did you get all the highscores on this game? I thought you were the clumsy one."
You made an exaggerated face to show how offended you were, playfully swatting at Sam.
"I'll have you know, 7 years of Hydra 'training' and experimentation has its perks." You joked with the room. "One of them being I can beat your ass at pretty much any video game."
"Oh, you're so on." Sam smiled, glad he could joke around with you about it.
Meanwhile, Tony looked incredulously around the room, being the only one in the room who hadn't heard about your history, he was rightfully confused.
"I'm sorry, 7 years of WHAT?"
2K notes · View notes