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engie-ivy · 1 year ago

Note

Hi! I really like your writing, could you possibly write a fanfic where Remus is a confident gorgeous bastard and Sirius is a flustered mess?

(Hi @arcades-n-academia! You might not even remember this request, with how long it took me to answer. I guess it took some time for a good idea to come to me, and then to find time to actually write it? I would say I hope it's worth the wait, but with how long the wait was that might be pushing it😅 Anyway, without further ado, I present to you:

Confident Gorgeous Remus Lupin and Flustered Mess Sirius Black!)

Being handsome, smart and successful, Remus has his choice of men. So he's allowed to have standards, right? And he has a type, namely confident and intelligent men who know what they are doing. Unfortunately, Sirius Black, easy on the eyes as he might be, is none of those things.

Or so Remus thought.

A New Side

Remus is feeling quite chipper. He's walking down the street carrying two boxes with cake from his favourite bakery, on his way to the office where he worked for the past year.

Remus is a renowned environmental scientist, but he took a break from that line of work to join an environmental law firm. He had wanted to learn more about the legal side of protecting the environment. What arguments are the big corporations using to deny accountability for the pollution they are causing? What data can these environmental lawyers use to prove these corporations are responsible? What evidence of the consequences for the environment is sufficiently compelling to a judge?

In return for learning the ropes of environmental law, Remus has been serving as an expert witness in their cases, and has consulted on scientific matters.

All in all, it has been a good year. Remus had a great time at the company, they made him feel at home and he truly learned a lot. But while he's going to miss the people, hard-working and dedicated to making the world a better place, he's excited to go back to his true passion: scientific research. He's got plenty of ideas, and he's excited to re-join his research team and get started.

Last Friday was officially his last day at the law firm, and since he's still got one week off before he'll take up his old job again, he's dropping by the office today to bring some cake and thank them for the past year.

As Remus pushes open the door, the first person he's greeted by is, unfortunately, Gilderoy Lockhart.

Alright, maybe when he says 'hard-working and dedicated to making the world a better place', that doesn't include everyone.

Lockhart doesn't particularly care about making the world better, he cares more about creating an image of himself as someone who is making the world better. He wants that aesthetic of a handsome, noble lawyer fighting for the good cause. Without doing the actual work, that is. Lockhart is known for doing nothing while taking credit for everything.

They would've kicked him out, if he didn't have a talent for charming people. Especially middle-aged women appear to be quite fond of him. Middle-aged women with too much money looking for a good cause to support. So since Lockhart is so proficient in bringing in donations, they continue to tolerate him.

"Lupin," Lockhart smiles. "Well, isn't today your lucky day."

'Because after today I never have to see you again?' Remus wants to say, but he holds it back. No, he went an entire year without clashing with Lockhart, he's not going to ruin it now. So he forces a smile. "And why is that, Lockhart?"

"Because today is the day you're getting the chance to go on a date with me," Lockhart smirks.

Remus blinks. "Sorry?"

"Yes, you heard that right," Lockhart says, still smirking. "You get to go on a date with me."

"That's… flattering, I suppose, but I'm sorry," Remus shakes his head. "I'm not interested."

Lockhart is silent for a moment, then he lifts his chin and tightens his jaw. "See for yourself then, Lupin. Your loss."

"Remus, you gotta help us out."

Fabian and Gideon have stopped him in the hallway.

"We keep arguing about it," Fabian says.

"So we need you to decide," Gideon adds.

"We usually don't go for the same guy, so this is new to us," Fabian sighs.

"We can't agree upon which one of us gets to ask you out, so we decided to leave it up to you," Gideon shrugs.

"So you need to tell us, Remus," Fabian urges.

"Which one of us would you rather go out with?" They both ask at the same time.

Remus looks from one brother to the other. "I like you both, as good friends."

Fabian cringes and Gideon dramatically places a hand over his heart. "Autch."

"Oh, come on," Remus says. "You can't expect me to choose one of you to date! That's just asking for trouble. Believe me, this is for the best."

"Alright, we normally don't go there, but since it's you, we are willing to make an exception," Fabian says.

"So what about dating both of us at the same time?" Gideon asks.

"Bye, Fabian! Bye, Gideon!" Remus starts to walk away. "Nice catching up with you!"

"You don't know what you'll be missing out on!" Fabian, or maybe Gideon, calls after him.

Benjy keeps nervously fiddling with his tea bag. "So… ehm, I mean, like, we won't see each other at work anymore, and I just thought… I hoped… I wanted to ask… If you don't mind, of course, maybe we could see each other outside of work? You know. Like dinner. If you like to have dinner. With me."

Remus stops from where he had been going through the cabinets of the office kitchen looking for cake forks to look at Benjy. "Oh, Benj… That sounds lovely, really. But truthfully, I'm not looking for anything right now, so it's probably best not to, as I don't want to give you the wrong idea."

It's not exactly true. Remus is quite open to someone storming into his life and sweeping him off of his feet, but Benjy isn't the 'storming in and sweeping you off of your feet'-type. He's the 'carefully shuffling in and awkwardly stammering if he may perhaps attempt to sweep you off of your feet'-type. Not that he isn't a great guy. Remus is sure that there's someone out there who's going to look at Benjy and see him worrying his lip and nervously wringing his hands, and think it's just the cutest thing ever.

But that someone isn't Remus. He needs a man who has a bit more fire in him.

After avoiding an awkward situation with Caradoc Dearborn, by pretending to think the flowers Dearborn gives him are only to thank him for his work in the past year, and Dearborn luckily takes the hint and plays along, Remus runs into Kingsley. At first, Remus is relieved that it's just his work buddy Kingsley, but when Kinsley leans against the wall beside him and gives him that smile, he knows enough.

"No, Kingsley," he says firmly. "No. We are friends. We work well as friends. We are not going to change that."

Kingsley lets his head fall against the wall and lets out a dramatic sigh. "You are a cruel, cruel man, Remus Lupin," he says, but he's smiling as he pushes himself off of the wall. "Well, it was worth a try, but I know a lost cause when I see one."

Remus lets out a relieved sigh as he closes the door to the break room behind him. Mary from Communications, Marlene the Office Manager and Lily from HR look up from their coffee.

"Oh my god!" Mary jumps to her feet and runs up to him. "Cake!" She exclaims, snatching the boxes from his hands.

"Happy to see you too, Mary," Remus says, rolling his eyes.

Mary sits down and flips open one of the boxes. "White chocolate pistachio! You're my hero."

Remus drops down on a chair with a sigh. "Has Mary brought her 'special' brownies to the office again?"

Mary glares at him, swallowing down a mouth full of frosting. "That happened once and it was an accident!" She says. "I took the wrong batch with me."

"I'm not complaining," Marlene smirks. "Best day I've ever had at the office."

"What makes you think the whole office is on drugs?" Lily asks Remus. "Again," she adds, almost as an afterthought.

"Just on the way here," Remus says. "Like, six co-workers asked me out!"

Marlene laughs. "Of course they did!"

Lily leans forward, resting her head on her hands. "Come on, Remus. You must know what's going on."

Remus blinks at her. "I promise you that I really do not."

"This company has a strict No Dating-Policy for its employees," Lily says. "But as of today, you," she points her finger at Remus. "Are no longer an employee."

"Which means…" Remus begins.

"Which means that all those thirsty men who have been lusting after you for the past year can finally shoot their shot!" Mary finishes.

Remus looks at Lily, but she just points at Mary and nods.

"It's true, Rem," Marlene says. "I almost had to ask the janitor to mob the floor in the meeting room after each of your presentations, with how much those guys were drooling!"

"And who can blame them?" Mary says, before Remus can protest. "You, standing there, with that casually tousled hair going on, wearing that button-up with the top buttons undone and your sleeves rolled up to your elbows, talking about critical deposition values, just oozing that whole 'Sexy Professor'-vibe…"

"There's nothing sexy about critical deposition values!" Remus protests, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Say critical deposition values one more time," Mary says, throwing her head back and letting out a fake moan.

Remus flicks a pistachio at her head. "You're a menace."

Mary sticks out her tongue and takes another bite of cake.

Remus shakes his head. "Good god, if that is the case, in retrospect, I'm very thankful for that No Dating-Policy. At least now I only have to endure this awkwardness for one day."

"Two days," Lily corrects. "You have to come to the office party this Friday!"

Remus raises his eyebrows. "Party? Are we celebrating?"

A huge grin appears on Lily's face. "Indeed we are! We won the case against Exxon!" She cheers.

Remus stares at her. "The case against… No way!"

"Way!"

Remus laughs out loud. "Oh my god! That's amazing! I can hardly believe it! I thought that case was mostly symbolic? That we didn't have a chance at actually winning?"

"So did I!" Lily exclaims.

"So did everyone!" Mary exclaims.

Marlene shakes her head with a huge grin on her face. "But don't tell Sirius he can't do something!"

"Wait," Remus says. "Back up. Sirius? As in Sirius Black?"

"No, Remus. One of the many other Siriuses that work here," Lily deadpans. "Yes, Sirius Black! Why does that surprise you?"

"No reason, just…" Remus shrugs awkwardly. "Well, he isn't exactly the sharpest tool in the shed, is he?"

All three girls stare at him like he has grown two heads.

"Remus," Lily eventually manages to say. "I don't know what kind of tools you have in your shed, but in most sheds, they don't come much sharper than Sirius Black. He graduated top of his year from Harvard Law, he takes on the most challenging cases from all our lawyers, and still manages to win more cases than any of the other lawyers, our biggest clients almost always request for him by name to represent them, and he receives about five offers per week from corporate offices willing to pay him at least five times what we can afford." She shakes her head. "We're lucky he's so dedicated to the cause, otherwise we would never have been able to keep him.

Remus blinks. "Really? Okay. Wow. That's… not what I expected."

The first time Remus saw Black, their conversation went something like this:

"Hi! I'm your new colleague, Remus Lupin. Nice to meet you!"

"Uh, yeah."

"So… what kind of work do you do?"

"I… ehm, I work for an environmental law firm."

"...Yes. I know. We're colleagues. I mean what sort of work do you do within the firm?"

"Oh, yes, I work in environmental law. I do law work. For… the environment."

"Right."

After that conversation, Remus had concluded that, despite what his first name might suggest, Sirius Black wasn't exactly a bright light. Their following conversations had only confirmed his suspicions.

"Hey Black. That's quite a stack of papers you're carrying. Big case?"

"Oh, no, just a normal briefcase fits fine."

"Oh, Black, can I get your opinion on the presentation I gave at the meeting this morning? What did you think of the slides?"

"I loved them! They were nice!"

"Yeah, thanks, but were they clear enough?"

"Oh, yes! I could see them very well. With the blue background and white letters. Very clear."

"No, I mean… You know what, nevermind."

Remus had assumed that Black, not being the sharpest mind, must be some sort of an assistant to the lawyers, searching files, copying documents, writing minutes, that sort of work.

Remus also thought, and he's rather ashamed to admit this, that maybe they employed Black because of his father, the infamous cut-throat corporate lawyer Orion Black. Maybe they thought that Orion Black would go a bit more easy on them when meeting them across the courtroom if his son worked for them. Though if that was the case, it was to no avail. If anything, Orion Black seems even more determined to take their firm down any chance he gets.

Remus even thought, and yes, he's even more ashamed to admit this, that the only reason they kept Black around could be because the man is so easy on the eyes.

"So, what made you think Sirius is a dummy?" Mary asks cheerfully.

"I've been trying to get to know him, but it's hard to learn more about someone when they can't hold a bloody conversation," Remus says defensively. "I swear, every time I try to talk to him, the guy can barely string a sentence together!"

The girls are silent for a moment. Then they all burst out laughing.

"Oh my god," Marlene says, wiping tears from her eyes. "I can't believe it. Sirius Black, with his infamous sharp tongue, who always has a retort for everything and can make even the most ruthless corporate lawyer tremble with fear, finally at a loss for words, because of a cute guy!" She laughs again. "I'm never going to let him hear the end of this, I swear!"

"As any good friend should," Mary says approvingly.

Remus looks puzzled.

"Come on, Remus," Lily grins. "With your experience from today, I think it's pretty clear why Sirius’ brain turns to mush around you!"

"So," Remus says slowly. "Black is actually both very intelligent and very into me?"

"He sure is."

Remus sits back on his chair and takes a sip of his coffee. "Interesting."

Remus is hiding in a corner. Not how he usually acts at parties, but he's got a very good reason. Two very good reasons actually.

First, it's so that he won't continuously get hit on, with people making flirtatious comments, bringing him drinks or making not-so-subtle suggestions of what they could do after the party now that they're no longer co-workers.

Second, it's so he can observe Sirius Black without Sirius Black knowing he's observing him.

Because Remus is intrigued.

Sure, he did find Black attractive. No one who sees him can deny that he's a good-looking man. But Remus never considered him as someone he'd potentially want to date.

Remus likes intelligent men. Maybe that's pretentious, but it's just how it is. He's attracted to men whom he can have stimulating conversations with, who challenge him and keep him on his toes, who he can share ideas with. Black seemed to be none of those things, so Remus had never looked at him like that.

Tonight, though, Remus is looking.

Black is, of course, the star of the evening. The whole party is to celebrate his achievement, after all. He looks stunning in his dress shirt and his long hair tied up. Everybody wants to talk to the man of the moment, and Black is making rounds, going from group to group, smiling brightly and making easy conversation with everyone. He looks confident and at ease, oozing charisma and competence.

Remus hadn't felt any particular way about the fidgety Sirius Black stumbling over his words, but this Sirius Black… This is a Sirius Black he would like to see more of. There's just something incredibly sexy about a confident man who knows what he's doing, and knows he's doing it well.

Black is currently chatting to the Bones-siblings– Amelia and Edgar are from the prestigious Bones family, known for their philanthropy and welfare work, and both are highly educated and strongly dedicated–, and Peter Petttigrew and Emmeline Vance. Vance is a tall, blond woman, who works for a pharmaceutical company and with whom they once had to negotiate a settlement with. Peter was quite infatuated with her, and keeps inviting her to these types of events, hoping to get with her, though everyone can see Vance has no real interest in him besides his connections.

Remus doesn't know whether Vance likes to play devil's advocate, or whether she's really defending her beliefs, but she's always taking opposing stances and arguing with everyone from the firm. Remus supposes she thinks having a different opinion makes her special and interesting, by showing she's not like the rest of them naive ideologists, but Remus disagrees. Sometimes, having a different opinion just makes you wrong.

Vance brushes her long, blond hair back. "You drive a motorcycle, right?" She asks Black. "Which means you need fuel. You can attack Exxon, but at the same time, you're one of the consumers creating the demand they're providing." She crosses her arms over her chest, looking quite smug.

Black arches an eyebrow. "I try to make the world a better place, whilst not being perfect myself, yes."

"Well, doesn't that make you…"

"A hypocrite?" Black finishes.

Vance shrugs.

"No one can do everything right. If trying to do good while you know you will sometimes get it wrong makes you a hypocrite, then not even trying to do any good only because you know you can't do everything makes you a cynic." Black crosses his arms over his chest and looks Vance in the eyes. "And then I'd rather be a hypocrite than a cynic."

"And you think bringing a company to the verge of bankruptcy with such an erratic fine is 'doing good'?" Vance asks. "If you take speeding, for instance, people don't speed because they know what fine they'll have to pay when they do. The fine Exxon has been given, however, is unprecedented. Therefore, Exxon couldn't have taken it into account when deciding upon their actions. Therefore, it is unfair." She looks quite pleased with herself.

Black does not look impressed with her argumentation, though. "We fine Exxon because we want them to not pour a gallon of crude oil over a baby seal," he says. "Not because we want to enable them to conduct a detailed cost-benefit-analysis on the strategy of pouring a gallon of crude oil over a baby seal! If they don't like that the consequences are unpredictable, good. It's a punishment, they're supposed to not like it."

"But you can't let such a vital company face the threat of bankruptcy!" Vance persists, clearly trying to get under Black's skin.

Black shrugs. "You're the one who started drawing parallels with criminal law. Alright, but then let's be consistent. What's the highest price someone can pay for the worst crime? It's their actual life. Now, Exxon has destroyed ecosystems, destroyed the lives of hundreds of people, and killed countless wildlife. It doesn't get much worse than that, so what would be the corporate equivalent of having to pay with your life? Bankruptcy indeed, if you follow your own logic."

"But do you really think Exxon is going to pay up?" Edgar Bones asks carefully. "I mean, Exxon has got an whole army of the best lawyers at their disposal. They can keep appealing the verdict to a higher and higher court, and keep stalling the process. The plaintiffs will be broke and forced to give up any further legal proceedings before they ever see a dime."

"If Exxon wants to drag this process out for years," Black replies instantly. "Then I will be breathing down their neck every single day for as long as it lasts and make sure they won't get a moment of rest from this case until they pay up! If we let them get away with this, simply because they have more means, it'll send a message to all companies like them that they can do whatever they want and no one will hold them accountable."

"But they won't be able to afford your services anymore."

"I don't want any money, not until the plaintiffs have been paid what they are due," Black says passionately, balling his fists.

"I suppose it's good exposure for your brand," Vance contemplates. "Being the activist lawyer engaged in a legal battle with Exxon."

Black gives her a hard look. "Some things aren't about money, or exposure. Some things just matter."

Remus stares at Black. That unwavering conviction, that fierce determination… It does something to him. Seeing that burning passion in his eyes, it makes something stir in Remus' stomach.

Remus chugs the rest of his his wine and places the empty glass on a passing waitress' tray, before making his way over to the group.

"Professor Lupin!" Vance says, batting her eyelashes at him. "Always good to see you."

"Hi Remus," Edgar Bones says warmly, giving Remus a quick once-over. "Glad you decided to come tonight."

"Yes, hi," Remus says, without taking his eyes off of Black, whose mouth is opening and closing like a fish without any words coming out. "Could I steal the man of the moment for a bit?" He asks, winking at Black. "To congratulate him on his big win."

Vance looks from Remus to Black and back. "Figures," she mumbles, before brushing her blond hair back and stalking off.

"Oh, I was hoping…" Edgar Bones begins.

"Of course, Remus," Amelia Bones interrupts, grabbing her brother's arm and dragging him away. "Come on, Ed. Let them have a moment."

"I hope I wasn't interrupting anything important?" Remus asks sweetly, smiling at Black.

Black's face flushes. "No! No, nothing important! Just talking about… how you should be a hypocrite, and how you can calculate the benefits of pouring oil on a baby seal, and how my clients will go bankrupt paying me…"

Remus arches an eyebrow.

Black cringes at himself, and covers his eyes with his hand, groaning. "Oh god, I swear… I swear, I'm actually smart!" He says. "I have more than two brain cells! I swear I do! The rest just somehow… switches off when it comes to you."

Remus throws his head back and lets out a genuine laugh. "Well, I guess it's good then that I'm not some corporate lawyer on the other side of the courtroom," he teases.

"It wouldn't have mattered then," Black mutters, crossing his arms over his chest.

Remus frowns. "How so?"

"I like how dedicated you are to your research," Black explains. "It's not just a job to you, you actually care. The way you talk about an exciting new research idea," a spark appears in Black's eyes as he talks. "With that contagious excitement, and always so hopeful, no matter how bad the world can be, that we can make it better. There's a fire and a passion to you." Black seems to realize he's been rambling, and he shrugs awkwardly. "I hardly would've been impressed to the point of my brain shutting down if you had been using that fire and passion to defend some bank's right to invest their client's money in cutting down the rainforest."

Remus stares at him.

He was not expecting this. His face feels warm, and- God, is he blushing? He can't remember the last time he blushed!

He thought Sirius liked him because he's handsome and successful. Many people do. But Sirius has seen him, and likes him for the kind of person he is. Remus feels something stir again, but this time not in his stomach, but higher, in the chest-area.

He gives Sirius a warm smile. "Thank you," he says sincerely, and then he laughs. "What can I say? Some things just matter."

Sirius just looks at him for a moment, before snapping out of it. "Oh, it's nothing." He wants to make a dismissive gesture with his hand, but he has forgotten he's holding a glass of red wine, and ends up throwing it all over his shirt. "Shite!" He curses, wiping his hands over his shirt, only making it worse. "Dammit, dammit! God, I'm such a bloody pillock!"

Remus looks on with a fond smile. Yes, it's going to take a lot of effort to bring out that confident, competent Sirius Black around him, but Remus has the feeling that it's going to be worth it.

#my tumblr writing #confident remus lupin #handsome remus lupin #flustered sirius black #awkward sirius black #environmentalism #environmental justice #smart sirius black #but remus thinks he's a dummy #catching feelings #wolfstar #wolfstar fanfiction #wolfstar fic #marauders #marauders fanfiction #marauders fic #sirius black #remus lupin #remus x sirius

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talesfromthesnogbox · 9 months ago

Text

I Want Your Video

Summary: Henry is roped into getting off on camera, the Hysterical Literature AU nobody asked for.

Rating: Explicit

Word Count: 8,815

AO3 Link

----------

“Pez…”

“Hazza! Come on, you’d be doing me a huge favour.”

Henry rolled his eyes. He loved his best friend Percy, he really did, but he had a knack for getting Henry to do things he would normally never do. And this… this, was something he’d never thought about doing, ever.

“Pez, I’ve got an actual following now. Don’t you think this is a little…”

“No! This is perfect for you. And with your next book coming soon too, trust me Henry, this will be great, you’ll be great."

See, Henry was a writer, just… not a very successful one. Until recently. His debut novel How to Steal a Heart didn’t do as well as he’d hoped when he upended his life and moved from London to Brooklyn. Broke from trying to market his book, and determined to not accept defeat, he took a job with his publisher, where he’d then become friends with one of the lawyers on staff, one Alex Claremont-Diaz. Unfortunately for Henry, Alex was so so much like Gabriel, the love interest to James in Henry’s novel. It was like he’d shook the book and watched Alex step out as he got to know the other man, and in his opinion, his perfect man.

How to Steal a Heart wasn’t the Pride & Prejudice Henry had hoped to one day write, but it was his first novel, and absolutely his baby. Three years sitting on the shelves with hardly any sales had Henry close to throwing in the towel. Alex encouraged him to keep writing, even if only for himself, but it was hard for him to find motivation to continue. It was only weeks later that Alex would send him the TikTok that would change his life. The book blew up, Henry started getting recognized on the street, the interviews poured in, and suddenly, he was signing for books two and three with his publisher.

And Pez, his best friend, wanted him to do porn.

“I know what’s going through your head, young man. The video isn’t porn, it’s an artistic statement on human sexuality.”

“Pez. You want me to sit on camera and read a book while someone tugs me off, it’s porn.” Henry played with his signet ring, refusing to meet Pez’s eyes.

“No one will be touching you, dear. It’s all remote control based, and very safe and respectful. I would keep my spot on the team but you know I’ve got to go back to London to see my dear Granny. Please Hazza?”

Henry rolled his eyes. “How many people are in the room with me? And do I have to get Shaan to sign off on anything?”

Pez’s excitable gasp put a smile on Henry’s face. “Oh my god you’re a lifesaver! I’ll send the documents over for him to glance at. The shoot is on Saturday morning, wear what you like, you’re still gonna be clothed above the waist. Just one person of your choosing in the room to start and stop the camera, or none if you like! I’ll drop off the goods at your office on Friday before I leave.”

By the time Friday rolled around, Henry had almost forgotten what he’d agreed to. Almost. Pez flew through his office like a tornado, giving him advice on what to wear, how to style his hair, and finally, dropping off what he came for.

“Brand spanking new, and yours to keep after the shoot, you’re welcome. I’ve got one like that too and… you are very welcome.” Henry grimaced. “I’m sure you two will have a lot of fun.”

“Everything I’ve learned about your sex life has been against my will.” Henry inspected the box Pez gave him. The packaging was nice, sturdy, expensive feeling.

“Well I happen to know you’re more of a size queen than I am, so lube up friend, there’s some in the box.”

His face scrunched in disgust as he reminded himself to never tell Pez anything ever again.

“Right, thanks for that then I suppose. Anything else I should know about—”

A knock and a mass of dark, curly hair interrupted his train of thought. Alex.

“Shit sorry, didn’t know you had company.”

Henry scrambled to hide the box Pez had dropped off, eyebrows shooting into his hairline as Pez shot him a look. “Not to worry dear, Auntie Pezza has a flight to catch. See you later boys, oh and Henry, tell me how it goes?”

Henry nodded at his friend, waving him off. “Safe travels, all the rest. I’ll call you tomorrow.”

Alex turned to Henry, a question gleaming in his eyes. “Hot date later?”

His eyebrows shot up into his hairline as Henry puffed out a breath. “No, no not quite.”

“Excellent. So you’ll be around tomorrow afternoon then?” Alex looked almost hopeful.

Henry winced. “Also not quite, no. Tomorrow night maybe?” He knew he’d probably be keyed up and feeling slightly self conscious after the shoot, drinks with his other best friend slash office crush would definitely keep his mind occupied.

Alex shrugged. “Sure, I can make that work. Want to try that new place in Greenwich?” He flashed his million dollar smile at Henry, the one that never failed to make him melt.

He’s straight, he’s straight, he’s straight!

“Sounds lovely. I’ll swing by yours around 7 and we can come up together?”

“Sure thing, sweetheart.” Alex gestured to the mound of papers on Henry’s desk, covering the unopened toy box. “So whatcha hiding in there?”

Henry’s breath hitched. “Oh—um well you see…” He stroked his chin, a faraway look taking over his features. “Well you know Pez fairly well I guess. He’s talked me into… helping out one of his friends while he’s gone with an… art… thing…”

Alex’s dark brow furrowed, he nodded along knowing he probably wouldn’t get anything more from the blond man. “Right. And I’m assuming the art… thing is tomorrow afternoon?”

He nodded, clicking his tongue. “Shouldn’t take long—well… ah—I um—” Henry stumbled on his words. “Yeah. I’ve gotta be ready for two.”

“Cool. Do I get to know what it is?”

Henry’s internal monologue had just become various screams. “Ah, um maybe I’ll tell you about it sometime once it’s done and I’ve consumed a lot of alcohol.”

Alex smirked. “Is that a challenge?”

He let out an incredulous laugh. “Git!”

“I’ll see you tomorrow, I want those dirty details, Fox.”

Henry blushed. “You have no idea what you’re asking for Alex.”

---

The time had come for Henry to be on camera, and in all fairness to Pez, everyone so far had been really lovely. Sophie, the eager intern, had him checked in with paperwork and release forms signed, and Theo, the director of the project, walked him through the afternoon’s timeline.

“So we’ll start with a short interview, just to get a sense of who you are, a bit of your background and what you do, then we’ll take a short break to get you prepped, and from there it’s go time. I’m assuming Pez dropped off the vibrator?” Henry nodded, taking in the information in stride as he remembered what he was there to actually do. “Great. I’ll be in the other room controlling the remote for you, so you don’t have to do anything but look pretty and read. Any questions?”

“Yeah, where… um—” Henry had taken some time earlier to stretch himself out a bit in preparation, but the toy was still firmly nestled in its box. Luckily the project was fairly portable, and the small crew had invaded his new apartment.

“Where can you get yourself ready?” His place was bigger than his last shoebox, but still small enough to feel self conscious about inserting the plug knowing there were people in the room over. It had been years since he’d had roommates, and he wasn’t used to having to monitor his noise levels. “We’re setting up in the office so it’s up to you, whether you’d prefer your bedroom or bathroom, we’ll keep crew away from there.” Henry nodded in acknowledgement. “I know this is intimidating, but say the word and we stop, you know that, right?”

He let out a sigh of relief, a smile crossing his face. “Thank you. I’m okay, just a little nervous is all. I’m not unaccustomed to strangers watching me finish,” he shot Theo a look, hoping he understood he was talking about random hookups, “but I’ve never done anything on camera before.”

“Totally fine, don’t even think of it that way, you’re just reading a book!”

He smiled and followed him into the office for the interview portion of the video.

Once he was mic’d up and properly lit, Theo started with the questions.

“Why don’t you introduce yourself a bit, tell us who you are and what you’ll be reading today.”

A warm smile crossed Henry’s face. “Hi, I’m Henry Fox, and I’m a writer. Originally hailing from London, I moved to New York with my best friend Pez to be closer to my publisher. My book How to Steal a Heart recently became popular on BookTok, and has been in the top five on the New York Times bestsellers list for twenty weeks in a row. It follows a young prince named James who goes undercover as a commoner weeks before his wedding to Lady Elizabeth. James meets Gabriel, a Spanish traveller, who’s been sent to England to steal a precious jewel from the royal family, but instead steals James’ heart.” He looks down at his desk, stroking the spine of the book. “I poured my heart and soul into this book, and it’s incredibly touching to hear how much everyone else has loved it too. But I won’t be reading this today.”

Henry picked up the other book on his desk, a well loved copy of a Regency era romance, two handsome men on the cover. “The Servant and the Gentleman by Annabelle Greene. These have kind of become my guilty pleasure read when I’m not in the headspace for something like Pride & Prejudice. There’s something romantic and sexy about the Regency era, when a simple brush of fingers can cause an audience to gasp. Of course this one is a lot, erm, smuttier than Austen’s work, but it’s a work I’ve returned to a few times.” He looks up at Theo, who’s leaning against the doorframe with a smile.

“Great! You’re a natural on camera, Henry.” Theo leads the excess crew out of the room in preparation for the next stage. He hands him a bath robe and walks him to his bedroom. “We’re going to fix up the desk a little bit, throw a sheet over it so your lower half is covered. We tested the remote already, so you just need to worry about you, okay?”

Henry nodded in understanding, taking the box from Sophie the intern, and closing his door. The nerves had begun to settle in as he unboxed the black, silicone plug. It felt nice, soft and lightweight, the small light indicating it was already on but the motor not started. He gave it a wash, letting it air dry on a clean towel as he stepped out of his trousers and briefs. His heart pounded as he poured a bit of lube on his fingers and got to work opening himself up.

A short few minutes later, he was able to slip the the toy in. Henry groaned, his cock finally warming up to the idea of what he was about to do. Taking a deep breath, he donned the robe Theo had given him, and walked out into the office.

Henry knew realistically this wasn’t the first video the crew had done. Pez mentioned they were filming twelve over the course of a few weeks, and his had been near the end, but he was fairly surprised by the professionalism of it all. He settled into his chair, a towel already laid down, and sheet covering his legs from the room, and dropped the robe. His breath hitched as the plug nudged his prostate; they hadn’t even started filming and he already knew he was fucked.

“Alright. If we’re ready to go, I’ll just give you a bit of a run down. We’ll hit record on the camera and get out of your way, I’ve got headphones so I can monitor what you’re saying. You’ll start by introducing yourself and the book you’re reading, once you’ve finished, state your name once more and the title of the book. We’ll wait outside until you’re ready for us to come back in. I’ll control the remote from this side of the door. If ever it gets too intense or you don’t want to continue, please just yell for one of the crew and we stop. You understand so far?”

Henry nodded.

“Verbal consent please hon, things can get pretty intense and I want to make sure you’re okay.”

Henry smiled. “Yes, thank you Theo, I understand.”

He gave a quick nod and continued. “Don’t worry about holding back, noises, faces, words are all good, but please don’t feel the need to put on a show. I want you to be authentic in yourself, show us what your pleasure looks like. It’s a beautiful thing, it’s poetic, it’s art. Last thing, don’t worry about how long or short you last here. We’ve had a few people last a couple paragraphs, and one last a couple chapters. Take what you need.”

“Got it. I—I think I’m ready.”

Theo smiled. “Good, we’re ready on our end as well. I’ll hit record, and as soon as I’m out the door, you can start.”

Henry nodded one last time, wriggling in his chair and turning to the chapter. Theo gave him a thumbs up, and closed the door, leaving him alone. He took a deep breath, and stared down the barrel of the lens. “Hi, I’m Henry Fox, and today I’ll be reading The Servant and The Gentleman by Annabelle Greene.”

He cleared his throat, eyes scanning the page before he started. “Chapter ten. One bed. A very large bed, a mahogany four-poster that took up most of the sloping attic room, but still a bed in the singular rather than plural. Josiah sat awkwardly on one corner of it, the feathers in the mattress astonishingly soft.”

Henry’s fingers twitched in anticipation, his pulse quickening; the wait for the vibrations to start was almost agonizing, and his cock thickened as the wait for pleasure stretched on. He could begin to understand why this was so erotic. He was alone so the pleasure felt like it was all his, but in reality, someone on the other side of that door held the key to his undoing.

He continued the chapter, getting accustomed to the way his voice sounded in the room alone, when he jolted as a low thrumming vibration started. “He’d noticed, then. He’d seen what Josiah had secretly h-hoped he would. Josiah took a step towards Hartley, seized with a sudden, overwhelming desire to k-kiss him.” Henry stumbled over the words, taking deep breaths as he tried to read in earnest. He shifted in his seat, hoping to take some pressure away, but the new angle had the bulbous head of the plug settle right up against his prostate. Almost like clockwork, the vibrations levelled up.

His words became breathy, and he gulped in air, trying to hold back the whines he desperately wanted to let go, but he kept reading. “He held his breath as Mr. Balfour moved closer. Close enough to press against him, chest to chest, thigh to thigh. Hartley sighed, a deep shiver running through him as he looked into the man’s warm brown eyes—Oh!” Henry dropped the book from his left hand, his palm coming flat to the table as he tilted his head down and closed his eyes in pleasure. He bit his lip, and scrunched his nose, resisting the urge to roll his hips. His cock was now fully interested in what was happening, he was half hard, and so badly wanted to wrap his hand around his length. But with a low chuckle, he returned both hands to the book and continued reading.

“He couldn’t even think of him as Mr. Balfour anymore.” Henry composed himself, getting accustomed to the new speed of the toy. “Not in this naked, vulnerable light. Master, servant, Mr. Hartley, Mr. Balfour; no rank, no polite form of address, quite held up to scrutiny. Not here. Not now.” He gasped, gripping the book with white knuckled fingers, and let the air out with a hum through closed lips. “Fuckin’ hell that’s… wow.” With a shake of his head, he read on.

“The man in front of him was Josiah. As for himself, he was no one, no one at all. Just a terrified creature in desperate need of relief, of fulfilment that only Josiah could provide.” His voice was shaky, and his knee bounced under the table. “Hartley stared, briefly shocked at the idea of it, before Josiah’s lips met his, and thoughts were suddenly, deliciously drowned in f—uuuuck.” Henry threw his head back, chest heaving as he finally gave into his instincts and let his hips roll. With every rock of his hips, the plug pushed against his prostate, sending jolts of pleasure through his body. His cock leaked a steady stream of precum, and his fingers itched to grasp himself, spread his wetness down his length, pump into his fist, with a name on his lips. And suddenly he remembered where he was again. “Deliciously drowned in feeling.”

“There was no room anymore. No door, no walls, no confinement whatsoever. With J-Josiah’s kiss came infinite sp—infinite space; a liberation so complete that H-Hartley couldn’t help but sigh with relief.” His fingers shook as he traced the words, and suddenly, that telltale tingle at the base of his spine started. “O—oh f—fuck.” He moaned in earnest, the dam breaking now as he writhed in his seat. “He—unnhh!” Henry slammed his palm down against the desk again, shoulders hunching forwards as his hand curled. He was close, but it wasn’t enough. If he could only get a hand around himself…

Henry panted lowly, not sure if it was deemed appropriate to ask to go up in speed, but as if his mind had been read, the vibrations kicked it up a notch. The book was long forgotten, his eyes were closed, and he was sure his face was a picture of pleasure. A second jolt of pleasure railed through him as the piece of the toy wedged against his perineum sparked to life. His cock leaked steadily now, he shook as he reached back to grip the edge of the chair, a strangled cry leaving his throat. His other hand slammed against the table, losing his page in the book entirely. His hips rocked against the chair and he whimpered. “Ffffuck, f—fuck, A—Ale…. christ.” He choked in a breath, back going taut as his hips stuttered, and with a shout, he came.

His ass clenched around the plug as he painted the towel draped across his lap. The shocks kept coming, he felt like it would never end, like he never wanted it to end, it was fucking good. An airy giggle left his lips as his head lolled back, the aftershocks of his orgasm wracking through him, milking the plug he had absolutely no control over. Henry kind of felt invincible, like he could do it again, and again, and again, until his body could give nothing else. He’d never came so hard, not even with the best fuck he’d had, and in that moment he knew, he’d put on a damn good show.

The camera crew must have heard him coming down, because the vibrations stopped shortly after he’d caught his breath. Henry chuckled and shook his head, breathing in once, twice, then looking right down the barrel of the lens again and saying, “My name is Henry Fox, and I’ve just read The Servant and The Gentleman by Annabelle Greene.”

He blinked once, twice, giving Theo enough room to cut the end of his shot, then he moved to clean himself up. Wiping himself down brought the sudden realization that this was going to be online… and then it dawned on him… what if Alex saw this?

---

Henry wrung his hands together as he met up with Alex for their dinner in Greenwich. He was still keyed up despite the satiated feeling that took over his body as soon as Theo and his crew left that afternoon; it was a different type of intensity, the anticipation of knowing Alex could find out at any point what he was doing that afternoon. And of course, the anxiety of knowing he’d pretty well shouted Alex’s name as he came.

“Henry… hey, are you… are you there man?”

Henry blinked at Alex, shaking his head slightly pulling himself out of his thoughts. “Yes, yes sorry. You were saying?”

Alex stopped, pulling Henry to the edge of the sidewalk when he’d earned a grumble under their breath from a passing pedestrian. “Are you okay? You seem off. Did something happen?”

“What? No, I’m fine! I’m fine.”

Alex cocked his head to the side and raised an eyebrow. “You sure about that? You’ve been quiet since you came to get me.”

A smile graced Henry’s face finally, hopefully levelling out some of Alex’s concern. “Yes, I’m sure, I’m fine. I think this afternoon was just a little more… intense than I was anticipating.”

“Oh yeah!” Alex lit up once more, guiding Henry back onto the sidewalk towards their destination. “How’d your art thing go?”

Henry held back the urge to laugh. What did he even say to that? It was incredible? The best orgasm he’d ever had? Oh, I came so hard my brain leaked out my ears, and you can watch it all in dazzling 4K, coming soon to a youtube channel near you. Don’t get freaked out if you maybe hear your name towards the end, I definitely wasn’t thinking of you railing me into next week.

“It was good, the people were nice.”

Alex shot him a look. “That’s it? You ever gonna tell me what it was about? Oh! Or will I maybe see it down the line?” A high pitched giggle left Henry’s mouth. “What’s that supposed to mean? My god, did you like pose nude or something?”

Henry tilted his head side to side, face scrunched. “Or something.”

“What!” Alex grabbed Henry’s forearm, shooting heat through him and making him blush. That beautiful smile graced his features, deviant and excitable, making him feel oddly supported. “Oh my god Henry, did you do a boudoir shoot? This whole time I thought you were a prude, have you been holding out on me?”

Henry scoffed. “You’ve read my book, you know I’m not a prude.”

“I thought we were friends, would you just tell me already? It’s killing me here man!”

“Maybe in time. And with a lot of alcohol, remember? Just… drop it for tonight, please?”

Alex rolled his eyes. “Fine. I’ll drop it. But when you do finally tell me what it was, I wanna see it!”

Henry’s heart skipped a beat. “Absolutely not.”

---

irl chaos demon

[10:15 p.m.] Dude, have you seen this?

Alex swiped away Nora’s text, knowing it was probably some TikTok trend, and he was not willing to start on that rabbit hole tonight.

irl chaos demon

[10:18 p.m.] I just finished watching it and… I think you’ll want to see this 👀

He eyed the message carefully before finally clicking on the notification and seeing the youtube link she’d sent him. Intimate Words: Session Ten: Henry.

Oh?

The thumbnail was vague. Alex recognized the background to be Henry’s apartment office space, with the wall of books behind him. He was seated at his desk, a book open in front of him, as he smiled softly into the camera. His hair wasn’t messy, but it wasn’t slicked back into his usual perfect coif. Alex imagined this softer, more undone version of Henry was one reserved for the comforts of his own home when he shared it with someone more… well intimately. He clicked through to the video, a short logo stinger introducing it, and oh! This must have been the art thing he was doing those few weeks ago!

Alex paused the video, considering the idea of texting Henry to let him know he would be watching… but then remembered how skittish he’d been about it. He’d gotten the impression that Henry didn’t want Alex watching this. The description was about as vague as the thumbnail, it read ‘Author Henry Fox reads from The Servant and The Gentleman by Annabelle Greene. Directed by Theo Lawson’

It seemed straightforward enough, just Henry reading a book… so then why was he so embarrassed about it?

Alex did the only thing he could think to do at that moment. He called June.

“Hey Lil Bit, what’s up?”

“Did Nora show you a video of Henry?”

June scoffed. “Yeah, she did. I didn’t watch it all the way through cause he’s like my less annoying non-biological brother and that would be weird, but…”

“Why didn’t you finish the video? She said I’ll want to see it, but it didn’t sound like Henry wanted me to see it.”

June went silent.

“Bug, what’s up with this fucking video?”

“Alejandro!” Nora joined the call, sitting beside June. “To what do we owe the pleasure, we just got into bed.”

“Gross. Nora what’s with the link?”

“Ooooooh! Did you watch it? Hot, right?”

It was Alex’s turn to be silent.

“Oooohhhkay, I’m going to guess from your lack of response you either didn’t watch it, or are currently questioning your sexuality.”

“Nora, why the fuck would this video make me question my sexuality?”

Nora chuckled. “So you really didn’t watch it, huh. Have you actually not heard about this project?”

“Clearly I haven’t.” Alex went right to Google. The Intimate Words project. He clicked on the first link to the official site and read through the description, eyes going wide. “Nora… did Henry… sorry explain this to me like I’m five. What am I looking at?”

“Henry read a book on camera while getting some good vibrations, pun intended, as an artistic statement in favour of normalizing what pleasure looks like on different people.”

Alex took a deep breath. “Okay. Okay. Soooo, should I watch it?”

“I dunno Alex, should you?”

“I mean do I want to watch it?”

Her voice went softer. “I can’t answer that Alejandro, do you want to watch it?”

Alex dropped his hand, looking at the video thumbnail again. Henry’s soft smile stared back, warm and inviting, and for a moment, a flutter erupted in his chest. He was straight. He was straight? At least he was pretty sure he was straight… Was he?

His head spun as he thought back to every interaction he’d had with Henry since meeting him. They riffed off each other perfectly, best buds, a good pal, but… but Alex was disappointed whenever Henry would cancel plans, and everything felt better, brighter, when Henry was around.

A few minutes of comfortable silence had passed. “Nora? I’m gonna go.”

“You okay Lil Bit?” This time it was June that chimed in.

“Yeah, I’m good, well, we’ll see how I’m feeling in a bit I guess.”

“Call me when you’re done!” Nora shouted over the phone.

“Ew, that’s my brother, asshole.”

Alex hung up before their fighting turned into something he wouldn’t be able to un-hear, and clicked on the video. His heart was thrumming in his chest as Henry’s smooth voice rang through his bedroom, and he began reading.

It was only a minute or so into the video, but nothing out of the ordinary had happened. It was just Henry, he was just reading, and maybe it wouldn’t be that bad. He was twitchier than usual, but Alex figured it had to do with the nature of the video he was performing in. Henry didn’t seem like the type of person to do anything like this. Admittedly, Alex didn’t know really much about Henry’s dating life, he tended to keep pretty quiet about it at work or otherwise, but apparently he was more adventurous than Alex thought him to be.

But then came the stuttering.

And Alex’s body finally caught up with what his brain knew he was watching.

From the first breathy gasp Henry let out, Alex knew the answer to the question he’d had in his mind since the phone call with Nora. It was a clear and resounding no.

He watched as Henry bit his full bottom lip, a stream of little noises spilling from between his teeth. Alex could see the way his fingers trembled against the desk, like Henry was unable to control the way they spasmed as he let what clearly was a magnificent feeling wash over him. He wasn’t entirely sure just what was being used on Henry, but his mind ran rampant with ideas, and it took less than a minute for his own cock to stir in his joggers.

Alright, guess we’re doing this.

Henry’s voice shook deliciously as he continued to read, and for a moment, Alex thought about having him read aloud while Henry rode his cock. He groaned at the idea, which apparently Henry from the video could tell. “Fuckin’ hell that’s… wow.”

The surprise from his lips was almost endearing, no, adorable, but only for another minute because shortly after Henry let out a downright filthy string of expletives.

“Fuck baby.” Alex groaned, watching Henry grind away on his desk chair. He wanted to mark up that perfect neck, suck bruises wherever he could, nip away at those sinful collarbones… he wanted to be the one making Henry feel like that.

Henry’s composure was waining, and so was Alex’s as his fingers twitched, itching to get a hand on himself. He could see the moment Henry gave up on the task at hand and focused purely on his pleasure, chasing what he needed, and good god, it was the hottest fucking thing Alex had seen in his thirty years of life. Better than anything he’d read, anything he’d seen, porn or otherwise, this video would ruin anyone else for him. Henry would ruin anyone else for him. His eyes were glued to the screen, he didn’t even want to blink in case he missed anything, and… was that his name?

Alex scrubbed backwards, hitting play and listening carefully and… “Ffffuck, f—fuck, A—Ale…. christ.”

He paused the video, the pleasure on Henry’s face frozen in time, the pleasure he’d gotten seconds after saying his name. Alex.

Alex opened his messages and texted Nora back.

TO: irl chaos demon

[10:58 p.m.] We’re talking about this tomorrow.

Tomorrow. Not tonight, tomorrow. Tonight Alex was preoccupied.

The sexuality crisis could wait. The imagery of Henry getting off with his name on his lips was past the point of sending Alex into a spiral, and right to him being horny about it. He pulled his half hard cock out of his joggers, not even bothering with pushing them down knowing this would be quick. A few tugs with his hand had him throbbing and leaking over his knuckles. He closed his eyes, the memory of Henry’s breathy whimpers racing through his mind. A bite of his lip and a throaty groan of his own, and quickly, Alex was spilling over his fingers, making a mess of his hand and the waistband of his joggers.

He only allowed himself a moment of contemplation before he was wiping his hand off on his bottoms, they’d have to be washed anyways, and going to brush his teeth.

As he stared at his reflection, hair tousled, cheeks flushed, Alex did what he did in every crisis. He made a list.

That video of Henry turned him on.

Nora thought he’d want to see the video, and he did.

If he was being honest, that wasn’t the first time he’d had some kind of… feeling like that for a man.

On some level, he knew that he had to be somewhat into Henry

That video of Henry really fucking turned him on.

With a sigh, Alex contemplated what this meant for him. There was no problem with him accepting the fact that he was low-key into guys. If anything, it opened up the dating pool for him… but he had a feeling he didn’t really want the dating pool to be opened past… well… Henry. He’d never really given a thought to his sexuality. Yeah, he liked women, he was confident in that for sure, but he’d never really thought about dating men until Henry.

By this point it was nearly midnight, and Alex’s head was spinning. He texted the group chat with Nora and June suggesting brunch in the morning and crawled into bed, hoping some clarity would come with sleep. That night he dreamt of Henry.

---

Brunch the next morning was… eventful to say the least. There was a lot of teasing on Nora’s part, and Alex spent the whole meal red (and not from the effects of bottomless mimosas). After much contemplation, and a chat with both Nora and June, Alex came to the conclusion that he was bisexual.

The more he said it, the more he felt like it really fit, and by the end of the weekend, Alex was feeling more confident about himself than he had felt in a while.

Monday morning at the office felt a little bit brighter, there was a spring in his step and for once he actually felt relaxed after a weekend off. That is until he opened his calendar and remembered that he agreed to lunch with Henry today.

“Alex, good morning.”

Speak of the devil.

“H-hey man, how was your weekend?” Alex picked up his coffee, blowing away the steam before taking a sip.

“It was nice, got a lot of writing done actually. I have another meeting this morning about my latest draft, but it’s all been pretty ‘good vibes’ so far with this book.”

Alex choked on his coffee, his nose burning from the hot liquid suddenly entering his airway.

“Oh god, are you alright?”

Alex nodded frantically, reaching for some tissues to wipe down the mess. “Fine, fine sorry, went down the wrong pipe there.”

Henry chuckled. “Just learning to swallow?”

“Something like that.”

Henry’s eyebrows rose, oh god, Alex thought, am I actually successfully flirting with Henry?

“So lunch. Spencer and Zarah can’t make it today, I think it’s just gonna be us two. I was hoping to maybe check out that new Thai place?”

Alex blinked slowly. Lunch alone with Henry sounded dangerous, but it would be suspicious if he also randomly bailed. “Yeah, sounds great. I’ll meet you at the elevator at 1?”

Henry smiled warmly and nodded. “See you then!” He looked back and waved once he’d walked away, and Instantly Alex knew he was screwed.

The morning stretched on as Alex waited for the clock to strike 1. Henry looked so good today in a soft sweater, the collar of his shirt peeking through, and his hair just a little bit undone. His heart fluttered anxiously as he watched the clock, not even knowing what the hell he even did that morning, and then finally, it was time. Alex grabbed his wallet and phone, forcing himself to walk, not run, to the elevators where Henry was waiting. Unfortunately for him, the sight of Henry made him lose every coherent thought he’d had until that point.

They rode the elevator down in complete silence, Alex worrying the entire time about what they’d talk about once they were seated. Henry luckily filled the silence with updates on his meeting, prattling on about the book and the notes he was getting from his editor.

The restaurant was a short walk away, and by the time they were seated, Henry had already recounted all the important bits of his meeting. They read through the menus, Henry glancing up to Alex every once in a while, and glancing back down with a blush when Alex caught his eye. Neither conversed with each other, even after the waiter took their orders and filled their water glasses.

Alex could feel the tension between them. He was making it weird, but all he could see right now was Henry seated across from him, writhing in pleasure instead of the put together slightly stuffy persona he kept up during working hours. From spending the weekend fantasizing about him, to sitting across from him at lunch was a very strange dichotomy, and suddenly Alex was having a hard time separating the two Henry’s in his mind. Was it getting hot in here?

“Alright, what’s bothering you? I’ve literally never seen you this quiet.”

Alex’s eyes went wide, his mouth gaped like a fish… he had absolutely no idea what to say. Does he just come clean? Tell Henry everything that had transpired over the weekend? Or does he lie and say he’s fine, just under the weather? Henry could usually read him like an open book, no matter what he says, he’d know Alex was lying. So all that he could come up with was, “I’m bisexual.”

Henry raised his eyebrows. He could tell that wasn’t what Alex had intended to say based on the slight wince that followed his short and succinct coming out.

“Sorry… that—I-I didn’t—”

“Alex.” Henry reached across the table and laid his hand on top of Alex’s lightly. Alex’s brain promptly shuts down. “Thank you for telling me.”

He nods, eyes focused on their hands. “Yeah, ‘course, you’re my best friend, Hen.”

Henry smiled bashfully and pulled his hand away, taking a sip of water. “I’m not the first person you told, am I?”

Alex laughed, feeling a lot more himself now that Henry was guiding their conversation. “No, Nora and June kinda walked me through a sexuality crisis over the weekend.” Shit!

Intrigued, Henry raised his eyebrow. “Oh?”

Again, Alex started feeling hot under the collar, his smile dropped.

“Someone catch your interest?”

“Ah… um…” Alex winced. “Something like that.”

Henry nodded, his smile not quite reaching his eyes. “Do I know him?”

Alex froze. He felt himself coming to a crossroad; he could laugh off the whole thing and say it was some actor in some new movie, typical bullshit, or he could come clean. Coming clean would obviously be the harder road… but would it? It would mean he wouldn’t have to dance around Henry like he had all day, maybe he could stop picturing his face masked in pleasure whenever he threw his head back in a laugh, and maybe, just maybe, it could mean Henry felt that way about him too.

Decision made, Alex begun to nod. “Yeah, actually, you do.” He played with the beads of his bracelet, a nervous habit he’d picked up, and braced himself. “Henry, I-I saw your video.”

Video… my vid—oh dear lord. Henry felt a hundred different emotions wash through him, confusion, fear, and embarrassment being the main features. “Oh god.”

“I—I think it was—”

Henry put a hand up, effectively stopping Alex from saying anything further. “I’m sorry I just… I’d really like for you to not finish that sentence.” He remembered the end of that video A—Ale…. christ… and let out a deep sigh. “Oh god.”

“Hen—”

“I… sorry I’ve got a meeting to get to.”

---

“Fuck, Pez. Fuck.”

“Hazza, I’m failing to see how this is a bad thing.”

Henry let his head fall to his desk with a thunk. “I said his fucking name Percy.”

Pez laughed on the other end of the phone. “Oh I know darling, I was a little offended it wasn’t my name on your lips, but this was a long time coming to be honest.”

“Pez.” Henry pleaded. “Please.”

“Alright, alright, I’ll behave. But I stand by what I said, I’m failing to see how this is bad for you. The man basically said you were his bisexual awakening, why are you on the phone with me instead of getting railed by—”

“Because! I don’t think I’m strong enough to only be with him casually. With him, it has to be all or nothing.”

He can hear Pez snort on, the tinny effect of his phone speaker doing nothing to hide the snark. “Okay, so go all in then.”

“But what if—”

“Babes, all I’m hearing are excuses. Why don’t you just talk to him? He’s obviously into you in some way, or he wouldn’t have even said anything about the video.”

“But I don’t know if he even had positive thoughts about the video, I left before he could say anything about it. What if he’s totally disgusted?”

“You’re not considering the facts though love, he said someone caught his interest, and—shush! Let me finish! Someone caught his interest and then he mentioned seeing you in that video. Sorry Hen but it sounds like you’re incorrect here.”

Unfortunately it did sound like Pez had a point. There was nothing really left to say, Henry had to admit defeat.

“Hazza, just talk to him. Please. I can feel your gay panic all the way in bloody London. I think you’ll be surprised by what he has to say.”

“Fine, fine. I’ll text him. To meet up and talk tonight. Or something.”

“Yes! That’s the spirit! Let me know how it goes mate.”

Henry watched the call disappear from his screen to find he’d already received a text from Alex.

Alex

[2:15 p.m.] Hey man, I’m sorry I made you uncomfortable earlier, it really wasn’t my intention, I hope you know that.

He worried the skin of his lip, crafting a response that would have him on edge all day.

TO: Alex

[3:05 p.m.] Hi Alex, I understand that wasn’t your intention, you didn’t make me uncomfortable, I was just startled.

[3:06 p.m.] Can we talk later today? I’d like the opportunity to maybe clear the air a little bit between us.

Alex

[3:07 p.m.] Oh thank god you’re alive

[3:07 p.m.] Yeah, wanna come to mine after work?

TO: Alex

[3:08 p.m.] Yes I’ll swing by yours after I let David out for a walk.

---

He was stalling. Henry knew he was stalling, and he didn’t care, he did not want to face this head on, but he knew he had to.

After a moment outside, Henry knew he had to face Alex, and knocked on his door. As if he were standing right behind it, Alex appeared moments later.

“Alex.”

“Hi.”

They stood there looking at each other for a moment before Henry gestured at the door. “Do you mind if I—?”

Alex spurred to life. “Right, yeah, come in.” He stepped aside and let Henry in, leading him towards the living room. “Can I get you anything? A beer, glass of wine, hell I can whip up a margarita.”

Henry smiled. “I think perhaps we should have this conversation sober?”

“Yeah, good idea actually.” Alex moved to sit next to Henry on the couch, leaving more space between them than they usually kept. “If you don’t mind, can I start?” Henry motioned for Alex to go ahead. “I want to apologize. Before you shot the video it didn’t sound like you really wanted anyone to know what it was. I didn’t seek it out, I promise. Nora sent it to me, I think she knew I was bi before I did, but I really shouldn’t have opened it. I thought about ignoring it, but I didn’t, I violated your trust and your wishes, and I’m really, truly sorry for that.”

“Alex, it’s okay—”

“But it’s not Hen. You told me not to watch it and I did anyway.”

Henry chuckled to himself. “I don’t recall telling you not to watch it, I think a part of me hoped you would before I… well we’ll get to that, but I didn’t explicitly say do not seek this out. People I know were bound to see it at some point or another, I’m not mad you saw it Alex.”

“You’re not?”

“Gods no. I’m more than a little embarrassed to tell you the truth. It was quite empowering, I don’t think I’ve ever felt that hot in my life, but…” Henry’s heart slammed in his chest, it was now or never. “Alex, I said, fuck I practically moaned your name.”

“A-are you embarrassed that you did it, or that it was—”

“Don’t even think about saying it, you know I’d never be embarrassed of how I feel about you.”

Alex’s breath hitched. “And how do you feel about me Henry?”

Henry’s fierce expression turned a little sad, and Alex braced himself for rejection. “You have to understand Alex, I don’t—I don’t do casual, and you just came out.”

Alex frowned. “Okay, when did I say I wanted casual?”

“Well I just thought—”

“You thought wrong then. Yes, I’m attracted to you. Like mega, big time, holy shit attracted to you. But I also like you Henry. And yeah, I’m new to this whole bisexuality thing, your fucking performance sent me down a rabbit hole I’m honestly surprised I’d never been down before, but I’d also like to take you on dates, and hold your hand, and kiss you just because I want to.”

“You’re attracted to me?” A rosy blush graced his high cheekbones.

“Obviously. Have you not seen yourself? And in that video? Jesus Christ I thought I was going to combust.”

Henry shrugged. “I honestly haven’t watched the video. I’ve never felt so… free, or sexy, like I felt so good after filming that, but I’m worried I just look silly.”

Alex scooted closer on the couch, letting his fingers rest lightly on Henry’s to test the water. When Henry didn’t pull away, Alex moved to cover his whole hand, lacing their fingers together.

“Trust me, there’s no way you could look silly doing what you did. You looked so hot baby.”

A pleasant shiver rolls down Henry’s spine at the pet name, and a smile settles deeper into his features.

“For the record, I have feelings for you too, I have for a while, but you’ve just always been… straight.”

Alex looked down at their joined hands, a chuckle rumbling through his chest. “Well lucky for you I’m not straight then, right?”

“Hm, yeah.” Henry moved even closer to Alex, pressing their legs up against each other. “I have to ask, have you ever been with a man, in any way?”

Alex winced. “No… but also yes.”

“Oh?”

“A friend of mine, Liam, from high school. We used to, I dunno, get off together. We never actually like… touched each other, or kissed or anything, but there was nothing straight about it. And like… he came out to me as gay after college.”

Henry nods, a smile on his face. “Ah, I understand. And… you’d want to do things like kiss me, and touch me?”

With raised eyebrows, Alex gives Henry a once-over. “I said I wanted to, didn’t I baby? Maybe not… all at once, but I’d really like to kiss you if that’s okay.”

With a bashful smile, Henry nodded. “More than okay, love.” He leaned in, bumping his nose against Alex’s gently, before connecting their lips in a chaste kiss. “How’s that?” He whispered, lips brushing against Alex’s with every syllable.

“Fucking come here.”

Henry let out a squeak as Alex hoisted him into his lap, legs falling on either side of his hips, and hands going to his shoulders. They stared intently into each other’s eyes, reading their expressions for any signs it was going too far, before meeting in the middle in a heated kiss. Alex’s hands went immediately to Henry’s waist, running his fingers across the small of his back. Henry felt more confident to let his own hands wander into the hair he so desperately wanted to feel. It was soft and thick, and everything he’d dreamed of, and with a light tug, he was able to extract a deep groan from Alex’s throat.

Henry pulled away, gazing once again into Alex’s eyes with the silent question of everything okay? His question was answered moments later when Alex hooked his hands under Henry’s ass and dragged him closer. He was breathless; they were chest to chest, and he could feel the effects of their actions from the man beneath him as their dicks slotted together along with the rest of themselves. They rushed forward again, practically drunk on each other with this newfound friction between them, lips meeting in the middle in a frantic kiss. Alex’s tongue met Henry’s and suddenly a new layer of arousal joined the party.

Alex pulled his lips away from Henry’s, peppering pecks across his cheek and down the column of his neck. He nipped a patch of skin at the juncture of Henry’s neck and shoulder, causing a yelp from the man above him, before soothing it with the heat of his tongue. As he worshiped the soft skin of Henry’s neck with his lips, teeth, tongue, Alex’s clever hands held a commanding grip on Henry’s ass, guiding him in a rough grind.

A whimper from Henry made Alex perk up, and he met Henry’s eyes once again.

“Oh my god, is this okay?”

“Christ, is this okay, please don’t fucking stop.”

So much for taking it slow.

With a chuckle, Alex dutifully went back to work sucking love bites on Henry’s neck. Henry’s hips moved on their own, a string of soft groans and whimpers falling from his lips as he ground down on Alex’s erection. The friction between them was heavenly, and Alex was questioning why he hadn’t tried this sooner.

“Fuck sweetheart, that’s good.” Henry’s following groan was stifled by his teeth worrying his bottom lip, and suddenly, it was too much, and not enough for Alex.

His grip on Henry’s ass tightened, and he used all his strength to stand up from their spot on the couch, Henry in his arms. His legs wound around Alex’s torso to keep himself from falling; he instantly felt lightheaded from the force of his blood rushing from his head to his dick. He knew Alex was strong, and worked out to keep his body in immaculate shape, but nothing could have prepared him for what it would be like to be manhandled by him.

“Sorry, just… too much, I was like seconds away from cumming. Is this still okay?”

Henry looked down pointedly at his own hard-on standing proudly between them before bashfully looking up at Alex.

“I guess it is, huh.”

Giggles left their throats, the two men finally having a moment to breathe after being so caught up in the moment. They giggled at the absurdity of it all, the fact that they’d danced around each other for so long, the fact that all of this came about because of some dumb (hot) video that Pez just needed him to be in.

“Where do we go from here?”

Henry looked around Alex’s apartment. “Well where would you like to go from here? I mean we could continue on the couch, or maybe the countertop, or if you’re feeling naughty you could take me to bed.”

Alex chuckled again, resting his head on Henry’s shoulder. “I mean us, where do we go from here?”

A smile graced his lips as Henry responded. “We’ll continue on, our standing Monday lunch dates, occasional Friday movie nights, and everything else in between, but we add the kissing, and the affection, and we just… don’t hold back what we’re feeling from each other. And we go from there. Let you get accustomed to being with a man, let our feelings develop. I’d like for you to be my boyfriend someday when you’re ready, I’d like to share my feelings with you, and ask that you communicate yours back. Sorry, that was terribly unsexy.”

“On the contrary sweetheart, open and honest communication with a side of promise for the future? Almost as sexy as contract law, talk dirty to me.”

“Oh you cretin.” Henry swatted Alex’s chest, then leaned in for a chaste kiss. “We don’t have to go any further than you’re comfortable with tonight, but I really would like to continue what we were doing, love. Take me to bed?”

Alex’s smile was nowhere near shy. “Yeah baby, let’s go to bed.”

#firstprince #firstprince fic #rwrb fic #rwrb #henry x alex #henry fox mountchristen windsor #alex claremont diaz #red white and royal blue #rwrb fanfic #my writing

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agentnico · 9 months ago

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Challengers (2024) review

That’s one way of engaging me in sport I guess.

Plot: Tashi, a tennis player turned coach, has transformed her husband from a mediocre player into a world-famous grand slam champion. To jolt him out of his recent losing streak, she makes him play a challenger event -- close to the lowest level of tournament on the pro tour. Tensions soon run high when he finds himself standing across the net from the once-promising, now burnt-out Patrick, his former best friend and Tashi's former boyfriend.

It’s safe to say this movie has blew up the internet. Zendaya with her major fan-base starring in a threesome tennis flick that’s brought to you by the director who revealed Timothee Chalamet to the world in that queer flick that featured the infamous peach scene? Now that’s quite the selling pitch. Naturally the result is a box office success and a movie that is already taking the top spot for the most memeable motion picture of the year. And I get it, this movie is definitely provocative enough and has enough sexual tension in it to excite any viewer. I’ll refer to my friend’s Letterboxd review for this movie with him saying the following: “I’ve found recently that hormones in films plays a factor in how much I like the film and this film is very horny”. Right, let’s not delve too deep into my friend’s evident sexual frustration, but he is not wrong that this movie reaches peak horny levels. Every scene is imbued with the steamy appetites of its central trio of characters. Like damn to these people want to f*ck hard big time! This should not come as a surprise though, as this follows a very similar formula to Luca Guadagnino’s other films, stoking the appetite of the youth to provide an open forum for unbridled desire to let loose. Call Me by Your Name, Suspiria, Bones and All, A Bigger Splash - every single one of these features tackles themes of sensuality and elegance. You know exactly what you’re getting into with a Guadagnino movie and Challengers is no exception.

That being said, with Challengers the actual narrative serves itself perfectly for a trashy B-movie experience, however it is thanks to Guadagnino’s directorial prowess that the film rises above that and becomes a truly cinematic experience. This thing looks great, and I don’t mean due to the lovely actors present, but the camerawork and the scene framework. The way the sweat drops off people’s faces in slow motion and the camera lingers on their stoic yet thoughtful facial expressions to the impressive tennis match scenes with a particular impressive sequence involving the scene being shown for, the perspective of the tennis ball which….I don’t know how the hell they managed it but that was awesome! Also need to mention the great techno score from Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross that creates an unlikely pairing in electronic dance music and classical, with the result really amping up the energy of every moment. Honestly from a technical standpoint this movie is a marvel.

In regards to the narrative that is where we start running into some trouble. For starters this movie did not need to be over 2 hours. The story was simple enough to shrink down to a 100 min max run-time, but instead the film opts to really dial in on extended pointless shots that linger way too long, so much so that I noted multiple audience members looking at their mobile phones to check the time. Secondly those excessive time jumps. Telling a story in a non-linear fashion can be a useful story-telling device, but here it was used way too much that it became distracting. Like there was a time jump back and forth every 5 minutes, with some jumps sprawling 13 years, which made it really difficult to get engaged in certain moments. Speaking of the 13 years, bless Zendaya’s heart but as much as they tried to age and de-age her through hair and make-up, she never looked older than 19 years regardless of the time era. For all of the film’s technical achievements you’d think they’d put more effort in the make-up department.

As for the actors, whilst I admire Zendaya for tackling such a meaty and, dare I say, challenging role, I feel like she’s too young in her acting career to be able to fully perform a weathered, jaded, cynical, ruthless and calculating character like Tashi. It seemed for the most part she relied on having a resting scowl face, but otherwise I found it actually hard to believe any of her chemistry with her male co-stars. As for the male co-stars, out of this love triangle it was in fact the queer relationship that really popped. Props to Mike Faist (who was a highlight for me in the recent West Side Story remake) and Josh O’Connor whose chemistry was through the roof! The way they looked at one another, to the churros to the way O’Connor smoothly moved Faist’s stool closer to his with his foot…… they can say they are best friends all they want but we just know they are both aching for those benefits! Again it’s how strong of performances these two give that hinders Zendaya who is nowhere close to their level.

Challengers overall is an entertaining enough youthful erotic crowd -pleaser that from a filmmaking standpoint looks fantastic, however due to the narrative structure and Zendaya’s arguable miscast this movie falters. That being said to Tom Holland, dude, I’ve seen your social media posts about being excited to support your girlfriend and going to see this movie, but dude, I bet your cried your eyes out after. Spider-Man - she ain’t coming home!

Overall score: 6/10

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taraljc · 1 year ago

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After the Hela episode of What If...?, I rewatched Shang-Chi And The Legend Of The Ten Rings and it is exactly as delightful as I remembered it being and I really really I'm going to be pissed off if we don't get another Shang-Chi film soon. like I could give a fuck about the Kang Dynasty but I definitely want to see Shang and Katy figuring out cosmic shit with Wong.

Speaking of Wong and that tag, one of my favourite running gags continues to be Carol desperately trying to avoid being press ganged into the Avengers or even being Avengers adjacent. The whole 'Bruce has got my number,' and Bruce responding 'I do not. I do not have her number. She does this a lot.'

(I do however absolutely believe that she and King Valkyrie are low-key dating.)

And just imagining how much Kamala is going to force her to interact with the world now that she is actually moved out of her spaceship and back into the Rambeau house until Monica gets back brings me such delight and especially I would like to know when Sam is going to show up to be neighbourly.

Cos you know it is only going to take about 15 seconds before Sarah lets him know that the grapevine has already been going crazy with another Avenger in NOLA. And Carol would be like how did you even find out and Kamala be like 'that would be me I posted on Instagram I'm by the way totally managing your fan page unofficially on Instagram and I didn't post the address of your house or anything' when in fact she totally geotagged a selfie like from the backyard.

I also love that despite Jersey City being as far away from New Orleans as you can be in many ways, the Khan family has accepted Carol as one of their own and helped her unpack and probably do a bunch of stuff that she had no idea how to do like get the electricity and phone and water and gas switched over to her name so she could pay them and she's like I have no money and Nick Fury face-palming like I will get you money.

(And the whole flashback with Maria being like so you need to take the cat and she's like oh no no no no we have had this discussion as if the cat is sort of their adopted child that they share custody of which I completely understand because lemon sharks and I share custody of Flynn and thank God Flynn does not have the ability to eat an entire cargo shipment and then throw it up a week later on the carpet.)

anyway I'm going to be seriously pissed off if Monica Rambeau is just written off being in a different Earth in the multiverse and we never get to see her and Sam meet. That will make me very very angry and I would like that not to happen, and I want to have faith I really do. But I do not entirely have faith? there has been a small lack of faith. especially when The Marvels did just fine and yet is being declared a huge box office bomb when it did the same numbers as other movies that were considered modest successes. It's like not every superhero movie needs to be a gigantic tent pole movie that brings in a hundred bajillion dollars some of them are just ladies road trip movies that happened to take place in space.

#shang chi #the marvels #carol danvers #kamala khan

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gt-mcyt · 3 months ago

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monsters vs aliens

(ao3)

Chapter 5: Monsters VS Aliens

George knew that monsters, by the American government’s definition – different, non-human, and dangerous to society – were rare. Sure, there were plenty of people and things dangerous to society, but not many of them were non-human, which was the key part in allowing the government to lock them up without legal protest. George was the first “monster” captured and experimented on by the American government, after all – even if he was more of a mutant than monster, if you wanted to get technical – and Karl and Sapnap came not long after he was detained. They were lucky that all three popped into existence around the same time, really. So, he didn’t expect another addition to Area Fifty-Something within his lifetime. And if there was, he expected it to be a werewolf or a vampire of some sort, not a cute, white-haired, hundred-foot-tall man – err, pretend you didn’t hear the “cute” part.

Despite Sapnap’s teasing, George knew that the demon also found the giant man cute and intimidating, and not in a scary way, but in a “trying to talk to him makes me stutter and blush” kind of way.

If only Dream wasn’t so held up on this Quackity guy.

“Quackity said …” this, and “Quackity said …” that.

George was getting tired of hearing about Quackity, and it wasn’t because he was jealous (yes, he was mature enough to admit that he was jealous Dream was engaged to someone else). It was because despite the obvious stars in Dream’s eyes every time he talked about his fiancé, George couldn’t help but hate every fact and memory Dream shared about the man. If he was being honest, Quackity sounded like an asshole. But Dream just couldn’t see it!

Maybe, eventually, George could get Dream to see his worth. Maybe, eventually, George could get Dream to look past his bug eyes and cockroach wings and get him to flirt back with him. Maybe, eventually, they could be together in the way that George wanted.

But today, George had a different goal: get Dream to shrink down to his previous height.

George was going to do it by using certain electrical currents, which would hopefully interact with the extra-terrestrial energy in Dream’s body, and – if the extra-terrestrial energy was the cause of his immense size and strength, like George suspected it was – it should reverse the energy’s effects on Dream. George may have been more of a chemist and biologist than engineer, but he still knew his way around a computer and electrical parts. So, using a pizza box, a toaster, stolen computer parts from the prison office (but shh, no he doesn’t have those parts), wires he’d pulled from the wall in his bedroom (he definitely didn’t do that, either), some stray batteries that had been in his lunch a couple days ago, some paper clips, and … hmm, he was still missing something.

Behind George, Sapnap and Karl were playing Go-Fish with Area Fifty-Something themed cards; however, playing any intelligent game with Karl was like trying to turn lead into gold (and trust George, he’d tried – he could branch out from chemistry and biology if he wanted, thank you very much!) Karl just … didn’t have a brain. And he wasn’t very good at cards, either. Patches sat behind Karl, peeking at his cards, and occasionally giving Sapnap hints when she felt like it.

The fact that Patches was more intelligent than Karl sometimes amused George, and sometimes filled him with sorrow.

“Go fish,” Sapnap said to Karl. He looked up at Patches, who started to lick her paw three times in succession, then stopped. Sapnap smirked. “Do you … have any … threes?”

Karl’s purple eyes widened. “Yes, I do! How are you doing this? You’re the luckiest guy I know!”

Sapnap grinned and cracked his knuckles. He reached over to the radio on their table and tweaked the antenna, helping the static fall away and making the music clearer. George’s eyes narrowed. Bingo. “Luck ain’t got nothing to do with it,” Sapnap said. “I’m just that – what the … hey!”

George jumped from Dream’s bigger table and used his wings to glide to the other, normal-sized table. He plucked the antenna from the radio, evaded Sapnap’s fiery fist trying to grab him, and scurried back over to Dream’s shoes. Dream, wordlessly, reached down from where he was sitting in his chair, and George climbed onto Dream’s palm. It felt leathery and firm, and Dream’s fingers were almost all as tall as George. Feeling Dream lift him from the ground to the table was like being on a roller coaster with no safety straps or harnesses; the only thing keeping George from tumbling to the floor was how Dream’s fingers curled over him in a mock prison, to keep him safe. George’s stomach was left behind as he went from ground level to fifty feet in the air in seconds.

As he was gently pushed from Dream’s palm onto the metal table, deposited by the Macgyvered computer, George’s stomach became unsettled for a whole other reason. George, still on his hands and knees, looked up at Dream and made eye contact with his gorgeous green – though they looked golden to George – eyes. His white hair curled and framed his soft face. It was like a bunch of baby cockroaches – or butterflies, whatever the saying was – were fluttering around in George’s belly.

“Uh, George?” Dream said. “Do you finally have what you need?”

“Um,” George said eloquently. Then he snapped back to himself, shaking his head. “Yes, yes, I do. In fact, I have everything I need.” He got to his feet and hurried over to the computer, sticking the antenna into the port he had created. The computer screen, which had been staticky before, now gave a clear visual. George laughed in victory. “They called me crazy, but I’ll show them – I’ll show them all!”

“George,” Dream said, looking concerned, “I’d prefer it if you didn’t do your mad scientist laugh while I’m hooked up to this machine.”

Patches meowed loudly, padding over to Dream’s chair and head-butting Dream’s side.

Sapnap leaned back in his own chair, “Patches is right. Dream, you’ve been letting Dr. Cockroach over here experiment on you for a month.”

“I’m not Dr. Cockroach, I’m Dr. Davidson!” George squeaked, embarrassed. He’d been a cockroach-human mutant for years, but that didn’t mean he appreciated when Sapnap poked fun at his situation or accident. He was … sensitive about it.

“Well, what choice do I have?” Dream asked, exasperated. He crossed his arms over his chest defensively. “If George can make me normal, or even eight feet tall, I can get out of here and get back to the life I’m supposed to have. There’s no harm in trying. I’m practically indestructible, anyway. It’s not like George can kill me with his experiments … right?”

Dream turned to face George, large eyes searching for reassurance. And though George’s heart clenched at the sight, and he hated how eager Dream was to leave them, he still nodded. “Right. I wouldn’t do that to you, Dream.”

“Okay, throw the switch, Doctor,” Dream joked. “But – but don’t do the evil laugh. Please.”

“Got it,” George said. “Now, you’re going to feel a slight pinch in the brain.” He reached over to the switch made out of a bottle of hairspray and flipped it without further hesitation, ignoring Dream’s concerned look. The wires and pads connected to Dream lit up with the electrical current, and Dream gasped at the pain, then the wires got red-hot, and George started to worry about just how much electricity was being generated – it shouldn’t have been too much, not with what he’d slapped together – but maybe it was reacting negatively with the energy within Dream.

Dream groaned from the pain persisting, and George made a decision. But just before he was about to turn off the machine and call it a day, the machine short-circuited and shut off, sending one last large bolt of electricity through the wires to Dream. Dream screamed and tumbled from his chair, causing a massive thump to echo through the commons.

George, heart in his throat, shut off the machine and jumped from the table, using his wings to glide down to Dream’s side. As he walked past Dream’s hand, he did a double take when he realised that Dream’s pinky finger was now as long as he was tall, when previously, George had stood taller than it.

George had a bad feeling about what had happened.

“Dream!” George called. Sapnap and Karl joined him at Dream’s side.

“Am I small again?” Dream groaned. He rolled over, leaving George, Karl, and Sapnap to hurry out of the way, lest they be crushed. Dream got to his hands and knees, still groaning, and looked down at the others. His expression changed from pained to crushed.

“I’m afraid not,” George said. “In fact, you may actually have grown a couple of feet …” He laughed nervously.

Dream sighed. “That’s okay. We can try again another day.”

Sapnap growled. “You really don’t get it, do you?” He asked. He threw out his arms in frustration. “No monster has ever gotten out of here! Nobody’s leaving, nobody is ever getting out.”

Across the room, there was a whirring sound, and a large metal panel opened. Bad came flying in on his jetpack. “Good news, monsters!” He said, “You’re getting out!”

“Until today,” Sapnap said, looking miffed.

“So, let me get this straight, Bad,” Sapnap said, “You want us to fight an alien robot?”

The entire monster team was on a moving platform, slowly trudging past multiple two-way mirrors and military personnel. Dream had to stay on his knees the entire time because the area had not been built for his hundred-foot-tall frame. He listened intently to what the general was saying, so excited that he barely cared about all the stares he was getting from the tiny humans.

“And in exchange,” Bad explained, “the president authorised me to give you your freedom. Granted, you’ll still need to live on base, because you aren’t human, and can’t get living quarters in a town or city, but you’ll be allowed to leave and travel as you want.”

“I can’t believe it!” Dream said, “Soon, I’ll be back in Quackity’s arms …” Then Dream looked down at himself, then at the size of the others. “… or he’ll be in mine.”

“I can’t wait for summer break back in the Florida Everglades,” Sapnap said, eyes lit up with a fire. “I loved wrestling alligators and freaking everybody out.”

“And I’ll go back to my lab and finally finish my experiments,” Karl giggled.

“No, no, that’s me, Karl,” George said.

“Then … I’ll be a really giant man,” Karl said.

“That’s Dream, Karl.”

“Fine. Then I’ll go back to Florida and be with Quackity.”

“That’s still Dream, Karl,” Sapnap said.

“I think I, at least, deserve a change to be with Derek!”

The group sighed.

After a few hours plane ride, which left Dream uncomfortably cramped in the cargo unit, they finally landed. The back door opened and lowered, giving a ramp for them to walk off. Bad jumped out with his jetpack, letting the others follow him. Dream uncurled himself from his position and, on his hands and knees, descended the ramp. When he was finally on the road that their plane had landed on, he got to his feet and stretched, hearing the satisfying pops his back made. Below him, the three little monsters walked down the ramp, and Dream caught George glancing up at his large height, eyes even wider than they usually were. Dream tried not to let it get to him – after all, it’s not like George had a leg to stand on when it came to seeing others as freaks.

“Let’s move out!” Bad called. He used his jetpack to fly to about waist-level with Dream, leading the monsters further down the road.

Dream finally got a chance to look around. The road they were on was empty and the surrounding area looked abandoned; they had been told that the area was in a state of evacuation due to the alien robot. But then Dream saw a large bridge off to the west, and his eyes widened when he recognised where they were. He flapped his hands in excitement.

“This is Anastasia Island,” he told the others. “This isn’t far from my home! Only about an hour out!”

George hesitantly stepped further out on the road and looked around. His eyes took in everything with a reverence that could only come from someone imprisoned for many years. His antenna wiggled eagerly, which Dream found almost … cute? George sighed in relief. “Just feeling the wind on my antenna … isn’t this wonderful? Being outside?”

“I haven’t been outside for a decade,” Karl said, then conveniently added, almost sadly, “I’ve only been alive for a decade.”

Just then, over the horizon, there was a large groaning sound. The fog and smoke cleared to show a figure maybe two hundred yards away. It was bigger than even Patches, probably three hundred to three-hundred-fifty feet tall. It was oval-like in shape – almost like a Kinder Egg with arms and legs – and had a singular green eye, which was surveying the land around its base. The rest of the robot looked to be made of various metals and had seams between metal plating that glowed a neon green. Bad whistled in an impressed manner. “Wow! That’s quite the robot!”

Dream’s jaw dropped. “It’s huge.”

Bad used his jetpack to fly back to the cargo plane, speaking cheerfully as the ramp and doors closed behind him, “Try not to damage it too much, monsters. I might want to bring it back to base to study!”

“No, no, no, wait!” Dream said, panicked, “You didn’t say anything about it being huge! Bad, wait! No! Don’t leave us here!”

But it was no use – the plane had already begun to ascend, flying away from the group.

There was another groaning sound, the sound of large and heavy amounts of metal moving and grinding against itself, and then the giant robot was facing them. From so far away, Dream still felt mildly safe, but then the robot shot a bright green light from its eye. The light fell on the group and, stupidly, Dream was reminded of playing Among Us and how the crewmates needed to scan each other in med-bay, which generated a light that ran up and down a crewmate’s body. It was like the alien robot was scanning them – though, for what, Dream didn’t know. He didn’t get the chance to investigate because, just as quickly, the light disappeared. The robot stopped moving and held still.

Karl smiled up at the robot. “I think it sees us.” He waved his hands in the air. “Hello! Hi! How are you doing? Welcome! We are here to destroy you!” He mimed punching with one fist into another.

“You are not helping,” Dream hissed. Then, “I cannot fight that thing. It’s, like, twenty feet taller than I am.”

“Technically speaking, it’s about two hundred feet taller than you,” George said. “I think you’re getting your measurements mixed up because of your size and how that makes other things relative to –” George stopped abruptly at Dream glare. “… right. Not helping.”

“I cannot fight that thing,” Dream reiterated. “I haven’t even been in a fistfight before, how am I meant to fight a giant metal robot?!”

“Relax!” Sapnap said, grinning, “We’ve got this under control. After all, most of us are indestructible.”

Before Dream could tell Sapnap how little that relaxed him, George walked over and put a comforting hand on Dream’s shoe. Or, well, it looked like it was supposed to be comforting. Dream couldn’t even feel the touch. “It’ll be okay, Dream. Why don’t you hide in the city? You’ll be safe there while we deal with the robot.”

Though he felt like a coward for doing so, Dream did not want to fight a three-hundred-foot-tall robot, so he nodded and was quick to turn and run toward the city.

Maybe he could help with evacuation?

“Finally, some action!” Sapnap said, excited. George rolled his eyes at the demon’s posturing. Sapnap stretched, cracking his knuckles. “I can’t wait to turn that oversized tin can into a really dented, oversized tin can.” But then the robot got closer, showing its absolutely massive size, and opened up its side panels to reveal its arms. Sapnap gulped, suddenly looking less confident. “Okay! Does anybody have an eye on when Patches will get here? We could really use Patches right now.”

“Patches wasn’t supposed to be here until later!” George said, panic filling him.

The robot got even closer, its feet crunching into the pavement.

“Wow!” Karl said. “Would you look at the size of that –”

“FOOT!” George screamed.

George and Sapnap got out of dodge quickly, but Karl stayed behind, eyes wide and expression in awe. The robot foot came down on the gelatinous blob, smashing him into the pavement and flattening him into a pancake. George thought for sure Karl was a goner, but then the foot raised – there were four of them, now that George could see clearly – and Karl hung from the bottom of the metal.

“I got him, you guys! I got –” the foot came down again, and Karl disappeared. Then the foot raised, and he was back in his human-like shape, stuck to the metal. This happened a couple more times as Karl continued to talk. “Don’t worry! I won’t let go! … I’m wearing it down! … Please tell me it’s slowing down!”

But it wasn’t slowing down. In fact, it was speeding up and heading straight for the city – where Dream was. And potentially innocent civilians. But most importantly, Dream.

“We have to go after it!” George exclaimed.

The entire city was dead. Everyone had been evacuated hours ago, leaving a city that was eerie in its stillness. Dream felt absolutely huge as he traversed through the ghost city. He barely fit through the tight roads, he accidentally stepped on a few cars, knocked over a streetlamp, and almost tripped and caught himself on the side of building, only to pull his hands away and found the concrete and metal crumbling beneath his fingers. Most of the buildings were shorter than him, with only a few reaching over his head – those being the skyscrapers.

Dream turned to one of said skyscrapers and caught his reflection in the many polished windows. He looked … not like himself. His face was the same as it had always been, but everything else was wrong. His hair was still curly, but now it almost reached his shoulders, and was white instead of copper. His eyes were brighter, more neon than they should be. His ears were slightly pointed, like an elf. His skin was paler than usual, thanks to two months locked up underground, and his freckles stood stark against his complexion. He grimaced, then noticed through the grimace that his teeth were all sharper, more jagged, with long canines. Dream reached a hand up to hook a finger around his canines, staring at his reflection with a somber expression.

Then the ground started to shake.

Dream knew that meant the robot was nearby.

Not for the first time, he wished he was smaller. Except, this time, he didn’t wish he was smaller because he wanted to be normal – he wished he was smaller because he wanted to hide. Panic filled his chest, the need to hide overwhelming. He felt a sharp tug in his gut and suddenly, the buildings around him grew taller … or he was shrinking.

Dream gasped as everything got bigger, and suddenly he was just as tall as the apartment he stood next to, easily hiding behind the build. Dream looked down at his hands as though they held the answers, but there was no answer. After being nearly a hundred feet tall for two months, then suddenly shrinking, Dream wished he had more time to freak out about it. As it was, he stumbled through the streets, trying to put himself further away from the robot.

Unfortunately, it was for naught – he was on another street when he was suddenly highlighted with a bright green spotlight. It scanned him. Dream gasped at how strong it was, hurting his eyes, and tried to move out of the light. It followed him, though, through Dream’s attempts to dodge it, and at the last second, it turned a bright red, then disappeared. The big green eye on the robot turned red, leaving it to look Christmas-themed as the green lights between its metal plates still shone through. For a few seconds, nothing happened. The robot didn’t move and neither did Dream.

Then all hell broke loose.

The robot moved one of its giant arms through the building it stood in front of, knocking debris and concrete everywhere. At his now diminished size – probably fifty feet or less, if Dream was guessing correctly – the debris was large enough to cause a grave injury if hit. Dream dodged it all and started running like his life depended on it.

Which it did, most likely.

Probably.

Unfortunately.

Dream ran and ran, until he reached the Bridge of Lions. It was one of the larger bridges in Florida and it connected St. Augustine to Anastasia Island. Dream had crossed the bridge many times before, but never had it looked so small to him – and he was only fifty feet tall right now! Regardless, the robot persisted after him. The only good thing about the alien robot was that it moved slowly, though not slowly enough that Dream couldn’t see it entering the waterway from a couple hundred yards away. As the robot splashed into the depths, Dream could see that the water wasn’t nearly deep enough to submerge and short-circuit it, which was a shame, really. Dream would have loved if the robot died before it could get to him.

As he got closer to the bridge, Dream saw multiple cars in what looked to be a traffic jam, but upon closer inspection, was due to an accident. There was a semi-truck turned over, blocking the path to St. Augustine. Dream looked back over at the robot and saw that it was too close for comfort. The humans on the bridge were in trouble, and though Dream doubted he could lift a semi-truck at his current size, he still needed to do something. So, he walked along the bridge, surprised that it held his weight, and went to help the stuck cars. His first instinct was to just lift the semi-truck out of the way, so he got on his knees and went to bend and lift; he surprised himself with his own strength, seeing as how he almost completely flipped the truck without even trying. Then he turned to the other cars, ready to push them through the open path if needed, only to see multiple people getting out of their cars, running away and screaming.

Dream almost thought they were running from him – and didn’t that hurt – before he heard the splashing of water and moving of heavy machinery, and he gasped as he looked over his shoulder and barely dodged one of the arms of the robot reaching for him. The entire bridge slanted under the weight of the arm, dragging Dream closer to what looked like a mouth on the robot – complete with a full set of rotating, jagged, sharp teeth.

Dream screamed.

He slid down the bridge but managed to get his feet on the upper and lower lips of the mouth, stopping his descent into the shredding teeth. Several empty cars fell victim to the robot.

“No, no!” Dream said, breathless as he tried to climb away, “no, it can’t end like this!”

Just then, there was the sound of a helicopter in the air, and Dream chanced a look behind himself to see a helicopter dragging a huge puffball on a string, luring a very playful Patches after it. Patches jumped one last time, missing the ball, but landing in the water by the bridge. That was when the cat-caterpillar seemed to realise that Dream was in trouble – she was such a smart girl! – and meowed loudly. She batted her paw at the robot, leaving large claw marks in its eye, disabling it. The robot stopped. Then Patches placed her paw on the bridge, pushing it back so it laid flat. Dream was finally able to breathe, and he looked up at Patches gratefully.

Further down the bridge, Dream saw the three little monsters making their way through the abandoned cars, toward him. When Sapnap saw Patches, he started to run. He greeted the cat-caterpillar with a smile, earning a loud meow. “Hey furball, where’ve you been?!”

Then he saw Dream.

“Whoa! Why are you all … small? Err, well, smaller?”

“That is so not important right now,” Dream hissed. “The robot is trying to kill me, specifically! It followed me through the city instead of going after literally anything else! Why is it doing that? Why would it –”

And then everything went dark.

“NO!” George screamed when he saw the robot crush Dream with its claws. For a few seconds, nothing happened. The robot was still again. George put his hands over his mouth, wanting to cry. Even Patches seemed to catch the mood, meowing shrilly and growling at the robot.

“Is Dream? …” Sapnap didn’t finish his sentence.

George closed his eyes, pained.

“Wait, what’s … whoa …”

George opened his eyes again to glare at Sapnap, only to catch sight of something within the robot’s claws, glowing a bright neon green. And then, miraculously, the claws opened. Dream pried them open from within, with pure strength alone, and he was literally glowing. No, not only glowing, George realised, but also growing. Dream went from fifty feet tall to over one-hundred-fifty-feet tall within seconds. George’s eyes widened in awe.

The bridge began to crumble, cars began to fall, humans began to scream, and Dream stuck his leg out to save the few ones remaining, all while keeping the giant claws open.

“Wow,” Karl said cheerfully, “you’re doing great!”

“I’m doing everything!” Dream yelled. “A little help?!”

Beside him, Sapnap grunted. “Come on guys, let’s take this thing down!”

He started to throw fire charge after fire charge at the robot but was unable to do little more than char the metal. George’s eyes narrowed at he saw the green light around the robot flash every time Sapnap hit it, deflecting the fire. “It’s no use, Sapnap,” George said. “It has a deflector shield. We need to take it out from the inside!”

George released his wings and jumped and glided down toward the mouth of the robot, where the rotating, crushing teeth lay. He grimaced. You couldn’t crush a cockroach, and he really hoped the truth held for him, too. He scurried through the teeth, being pushed every which way, the sharp barbs pushing against his wings and sternum, until, eventually, he landed in an empty area within the robot. He crawled as high as he could go, until he reached a small space with a large orb with several wires sticking out of it. In front of him, he could barely see out of a large window because there were four claw marks decimating the glass – the eye that Patches destroyed. George huffed, winded, and reached out for the wires.

“Right, right,” he muttered to himself, eyes sweeping over the different colours of wires. It all looked blue and yellow to him, curse his colour blindness. “Here we go …”

Trying to stop a giant alien robot from crushing you, along with keeping several cars from falling into the water and potentially killing the humans inside, was a lot of work. Dream almost couldn’t keep up, and he needed help. But he couldn’t call for Patches to attack the robot because George was now inside it, and he didn’t want George to get hurt. Patches seemed to somewhat understand this, because she was a pretty smart kitty. However, Dream could alleviate the need to keep the humans safe.

“Karl!” He exclaimed.

“What?” Karl asked, sounding genuinely confused.

“Help me!” Dream snapped.

“Sorry, I was just staring at this bird over there,” Karl giggled.

“We have to get these people off the bridge!” Dream instructed, ignoring Karl’s aloofness. “Help them!”

“Got it!” Karl said, giving Dream a thumbs-up. Then he turned, picked up a car over his head, and started to drag it over the side of the bridge, like he was going to throw it into the water.

Dream would have sighed had he been able to, but between everything he was doing not to die at the moment, he was a little hard-pressed. “No, Karl!” He exclaimed, “Move the dividers to let them through, not throw them over the edge!”

“Oh, yeah, you’re right,” Karl said, giggling again. “My bad!”

Karl put the car down, allowing it to speed off, over to St. Augustine’s. Then he picked up several dividers, eating them as he went along, dissolving the concrete in his Jell-O-like body. Dream used his leg to push the cars away from the edge, yelling at them to start driving. Further down the bridge, Karl started to slow with eating the dividers. He groaned. “Oh, I don’t feel so good.”

Sapnap kept throwing fire charges at the robot, but he was slowing down, obviously exhausted. Behind Dream, Patches was hissing, padding around in a circle in the water, clearly not happy with being wet anymore. George was still inside the robot, doing … whatever it was he was trying to do.

Dream was alone.

He grunted, pushing at the robot’s claws still crushing him. His muscles were starting to strain. If only he were a little bigger, then he could fight the robot one on one … there was a tug in his gut, and Dream saw his hands start to glow. He looked down at the rest of his body, seeing it glowing, as well. The world around him started to get small, and the bridge underneath him started to crumble between the crushing force of the claws and his weight. The robot got smaller and smaller, the claws getting too small to contain him, until Dream was able to slip out of the singular claw. Suddenly, the bridge collapsed under him, and Dream gasped – until he realised that the water barely reached his ankles. He was now at the same height of the robot, if not a little taller. Empowered by his new height, Dream reached out and grabbed hold of the robot’s arm, pulling it with all his strength. With a loud groan and pop, the entire arm came off, and the robot shrieked loudly. It blindly reached out with its other arm, the claw crushing the bridge more, but was nowhere close to hitting Dream.

“George!” Dream called, readying the arm he was holding like a baseball bat, “I don’t know if you can hear me, but it’s time to get out of that robot! I’m going to kick its ass!”

There was a large spark that came from the robot; it glowed a bright green, before the light completely disappeared. And then George was jumping out of the hole where the other arm extended from, gliding with his wings toward Dream. Dream managed not to flinch as George landed on his shoulder, grabbing the edge of the collar on his jumpsuit. George looked so tiny, barely half the size of Dream’s fingers. Dream couldn’t even feel his weight on his shoulder, and that scared Dream.

But even if he couldn’t feel George, he could hear him clear as day: “I’ve disabled the deflector shield! We should be able to finish this thing now!”

Dream took that as permission to start kicking ass.

When Dream was younger, he used to play baseball. It wasn’t his favourite sport – that would be football, which he loved to watch more than play – but he had been a damn good hitter. He’d consistently hit every ball that came his way, and had such control over his hits that he could control where the ball went and how high. This was all important because when he hit the robot with its own arm, he used it like a baseball bat, and he swung with all his strength. The arm hit the robot’s other arm dead-on, and vibrations shook up Dream’s arms from the impact.

The robot’s metal arm crumpled.

Dream swung several more times, aiming strategically, until he took a final swing and took the robot’s swiveling head clean off. The robot stilled and fell, crashing into the water and causing large waves to lap at Dream’s ankles. The robot’s eye stopped glowing and everything came to an end. Finally, Dream stopped, breathing heavily. He dropped the robot’s severed arm. On his shoulder, George cheered. Over on the part of the bridge that didn’t break, Dream could see Karl and Sapnap – looking so tiny – also whooping and cheering for him.

Relaxed, Dream felt the now familiar tug in his gut, and the world around him grew – or rather, he shrunk. He kept shrinking until he was at his regular height, and he had to stop and think about when he started considering a hundred feet tall his new “normal.”

“Oh my god,” George said into his ear, still standing on his shoulder, “you can size-shift.”

Over on the bridge, Sapnap howled. “That was so bad ass!”

“Do it again! Do it again!” Karl clapped.

Dream smiled. Yeah, everything was under control now.

#giant!dream #tiny!george #tiny!bad #tiny!sapnap #gt-mcyt monsters vs aliens au

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hazbinficsandstuff-eyeshadow · 1 year ago

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Helluva hotel fanfic(what do you think I take constructive critisims)

Chapter 1:closing

Blitzo picks up the horse standee covered in gems that he had bought a while back and placed it atop a box with other things. Papers filled to the brim with really nothing of importance, mainly random horse drawings and the “research” he managed to recollect after it flew out the window. Millie.moxxie. And Stolas also helped him pack.

”Are you sure you want to give up on this?” Stolas asked. Moxie and Millie looked at blitz with sadness and grief in their eyes. While they hadn't been successful blitz had made a name for himself. They still lived in the low-class. Millie had to lie to her parents about how well freelance was going but nonetheless they enjoyed the adventures they had.

“I really appreciate you all helping, as much as I kid around about you being my family here, I mean it. I mean you all are the closest thing to a family I have so I really hope we all stay in touch. I also want to thank you Stolas especially since you don't really work at IMP unless you count supplying access” Blitz responds.

With happy tears in his eyes as Stolas gives a slight smile the 666 news channel comes on the tv with Charlie and Lucifer replacing the spaces and pushing away Katie killjoy and tom trench as they yell at them.

Charlie whispers a quick “sorry” before looking back at her dad. Lucifer begins hitting a stack of papers against the table while squinting through his glasses, mumbling trying to make out his chicken-scratch handwriting.

Charlie rips the papers out of his hand and throws them back. “ Me and my father have been talking and he originally wanted to force everyone-” Charlie says with a hint of anger and attitude.

Lucifer cuts her off and says “ But we decided that we won't force anyone, although I offered to do it as a form of punishment-”

“ Because we can't force people to redeem themselves they have to choose to and the hotel is to help not punish people, although he did pitch it to me like a parole office or being sentenced to rehab like on earth sense we don't have jail in hell”. Charlie looks at her father knowing he's probably about to cut her off again mainly because he gets too excited and blurts stuff out but he notices the look and keeps quiet while looking at his daughter. “ Anyway we’re getting off track. The main point is that white we are not forcing anyone to come, we highly encourage everyone to give redemption a shot and try to better themselves”.

“Isn't this basically free therapy?” Tom asked from the background right before the broadcast closed.

“Dang it, they're probably the reason we had to close, also why'd that woman sound so much like me?” Blitz asked.

Moxie replied “ Why are you blaming the business’s downfall on the princess again?”

“Because with all the sinners going there I bet no one cares about getting revenge on those who wronged them in the living world, they're too busy worrying about getting he redeemed” Blitz says in his usual all-caps screaming tone.

Stolas pointed a finger up and responded “ Uhmm I actually think her business isn't doing much better than yours although I don't think they actually charge people to stay there so if they're not even trying to profit I’m not sure if it’s still considered a business, it's been quite the topic of discussion recently”.

Blitz trying to find something to pin the blame of the businesses downfall on says “ I don't believe it! I sure they had something to do with us closing, were gonna go there and find out for ourselves”

“If that’s what you want, boss, we'd be happy to come along” Millie says.

“Millie can I talk to you for a moment, ya know in private” Moxie responds. Moxie and Millie head out to right outside the door. Blitz was listening in head against the wall, usually moxie would check but today everything was too hectic to do so.

“ We’re finally able to get away from Blitz, we can finally be alone. I think if we do this one thing with him we'd be stuck with him forever. Him constantly trying to get in on what we're doing” he told Millie. Blitz pupils became almost nothing in his eyes as they shrunk from listening in to what Moxxie had said.

“I love you Mox but, do you remember when we first met? The only thing you could think to talk about was yer best friend, blitz. I honestly thought you and him might have had something going on at first” Millie responded.

“I love you so much too Millie , you're what's important. I only thought he was meaningful in my life because I met him when I was in a tough spot but now that I know you I can see that he's not really of anything of importance” Moxie responded. Moxie then went back into the room with the rest of them. Millie although still seeming not Completely satisfied with the result of their conversation entered with him. Blitz backed away from the door right before they came through and continued packing up as though he heard nothing. Blitz pretended to be fine as he always did. Stolas couldn't hear what was going on I the other room however he could tell blitz wasn't taking it lightly. He wanted to comfort blitz but wasn't sure how especially after all that's happened. He nervously put his hand over blitz's hand trying to console him.

Blitz looked up at stolas smiling “ do you maybe want a hug?” stolas asked.

Blitz looked at his face and was riddled With guilt he immediately teared his hand away and held both of his own hands together nervously “ sorry I…”. Stolas interrupts “ no, no sorry I overstepped…again”. Blitz wanted to say something like “it's okay” but he wasn't sure the exact words. He couldn't hand the guilt. Him and stolas hadn't even talked after what happened. He didn't even know how stolas knew about them closing. He felt bad that even though he had gotten him hurt and then ghosted him he still showed up to help with such a simple task. Moxxie and millie saw them but didn't assume what was going om had anything to do with they Were talking about just another day them.

“Do you still want to go check out the hotel blitz?” Stolas asked.

“YEPPPP” blitz responds sounding super exited to cover up their previous conversation.

Millie with slight anger in her voice Said “I'm going with blitz and stolas you can come if you want moxxie”. Moxxie looks co fused with the sudden attitude but follows anyway

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doamarierose-honoka · 1 year ago

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Juno Temple confirmed to Variety On the Carpet presented by DIRECTV while at the 2024 SAG Awards that “Venom 3” is finally nearing the end of filming. The “Ted Lasso” star is one of the new additions to the “Venom” franchise alongside Chiwetel Ejiofor and Clark Backo in the upcoming third movie, which is being directed by Kelly Marcel and features a story that leading man Tom Hardy co-created.

“We’re coming close to an end at the moment,” Temple said. “It’s been a wild, wonderful ride. It’s so new to me. It’s a big set! This is crazy. It’s been so much fun and I got to work with such cool people. I’ve been so lucky in my career to just have the most incredible casts. I can’t wait for it to get out into the world. I think it’s going to be a good one.”

Production on “Venom 3” was halted by the SAG-AFTRA strike last year. Cameras started rolling again at the end of November just before Thanksgiving.

“Thankfully we are back to shooting; and I want to take a moment just to thank all the teams thus far on the ride from V1 to here all our fantastic cast and crew- good friends and family – we’ve come a long way,” Hardy wrote on social media at the time.

“His relationship to how he feels about Venom and Eddie together…its something that feels really close to his heart,” Temple said about why Hardy is the perfect Venom on the big screen. “It matters to him. I don’t know if anyone else could play Venom. That’s a tough pair of shoes to follow.”

“Venom 3” follows the back-to-back box office successes of 2021’s “Venom: Let There Be Carnage” ($502 million globally) and 2018’s “Venom” ($856 million globally). Marcel penned the first two films.

“Venom 3” is scheduled to open in theaters November 8 from Sony.

#sony #sony pictures #marvel #marvel comics #marvel entertainment #venom #venom let there be carnage #venom 3 #tom hardy #variety

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pbandjesse · 1 year ago

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I woke up in kind of a bad mood this morning. Just not enough sleep and not feeling my best. James also didn't come up stairs and then they kept slamming the front door and I was just really unsettled. Not the best way to start the day.

When I went downstairs I told James how much I didn't enjoy the slamming and they apologized. But we were both kind of in off moods. They didn't sleep well either. But we pulled ourselves together best we could.

I had actually gotten out of bed at 650 so I was all the way ready earlier they needed. But I still left even if it was before 720. And I had a pretty great drive in. No traffic at all. And I got to camp at 750.

I would have a lot to do today. After I had my breakfast I would start writing out programs. Alexi would come in and we would half a almost half hour chat about what she wants from the schedule and all of the little things I missed at the end of the meeting. And I had a little more clarity about what the second "village program" block is. I have renamed it "cabin choice" for clarity. But I think I understand how to make it work.

I would spend the next few hours moving things around on the schedule and I really made it work the way I think they wanted. I was able to make it so there are specialty programs, village time, cabin time, all the other staffed programs like archery and riflery. And it was fun. Like solving a puzzle or pulling threads from a pile. I would have to take some brain breaks. But I really was making great head way.

Elizabeth asked us to check out the cabins for a group that was coming in this afternoon for the weekend. And so when I needed some time away from the computer I drove up to the Alaskans and walked around. Picked up trash. Made sure everything seemed clean. And then drove to the fort and checked out the rooms there too. Everything was in order.

When I got back to the office Elizabeth and Sarah were surprised I went and handled that without saying anything. They didn't know where I went. But it was completed and that was good. And it was time for lunch.

I would hear back from Parker about the check and he was so frustrated that the other staff didn't give it to me he literally walked to our house and put it in our mail box. What a sweet heart. He also hid our package, that was left on the stairs, behind the trashcan. Thank you Parker, you're a gem.

I would continue to work on my schedule and my programing ideas. I checked in with Heather and asked if we could go over everything later. She was finishing a grant though and it was due today so I would wait until she was done.

I would also help her with some math. Which was difficult! I got to learn was the revenue and expenses of camp are though and that was interesting. It was nice being productive.

When we would meet if was when everyone else was out of the office. Alexi left early to get Josephine because it's her birthday. And Elizabeth and Sarah had gone on a walk. And so me and Heather sat in her office and went through the whole schedule and she seemed really impressed that I made it work in the format I had already built. And I suggested we really start working on what the programing is, what we need to buy, and what we need to build to make it successful. So I am going to do that next week. I really hope that Alexi agrees this is a good direction.

I chatted with Heather about how much I would wander away from the group as a child. Just absolutely loved eloping. And how it was such a different world when I did it. Like it seemed no one ever looked for me. But when kids at camp run away I'm like. I get it. But please stop. We are going to get in trouble.

My laptop was on 6% which meant it was about time to go home. So I packed how and said goodbye to Heather and went home.

I barely had any traffic on the drive. And got home before 430. I saw we had some mail. Including the package Parker hid for us. And when I brought everything inside I saw we had a bill from Johns Hopkins. From when we were in the ER. When we were not actually seen or treated. So I obviously will not be paying that. Absolutely not. It did make me laugh though.

James would come home soon with more mail

They stopped at the left office and we had packages. One being a new bracelet they got me with "Jessica" on it. I love it. And the other being a gift from their aunt Jan. A door mat with our chosen last name and I just thought that was so sweet. What a thoughtful gift.

Speaking of gifts. I will have to start thinking about our housewarming party and invites and registry soon. I'm hoping for the first weekend in April? We will see how that shakes out.

James and me had a plan tonight to move the daybed upstairs. But after moving all of the stuff in the studio out of the way I got a really bad pain in my side and had to sit out. But James was able to take the bed apart in a few pieces and got it upstairs and reassembled pretty quickly. Was proud of them.

That little room is still going to have shelves and everhbting but we are calling it the "preplay room" right now. Like we would like a child eventually and that would probably be their room but also it's a guest room right now and where a lot of my toy collection will probably live. Fun fact I believe my bedroom growing up was also the guest room. Mom you can correct me on that.

After the daybed was set up James took me to Mathews for dinner. And they didn't even really need us to order. Root beer, diet Pepsi, thai pie, ranch dressing on the side. Me and James talked about camp and the programing stuff I worked on today. And the food was great and it was just a really lovely time.

When we got back James had to park in a very tight spot but they are an excellent parallel parker so they obviously killed it. And when we got inside we all (Sweetp included) cuddled up on the couch for a long while.

Eventually I came up here to write my post. And now my eyes are very sleepy. I still will take a shower and get all ready for bed. But I am excited to sleep in a little tomorrow.

The big plan tomorrow is to go to the apartment to clean. Then take an afternoon break. Then I work at the museum tomorrow night. It's been forever since I could say that. I miss it terribly. So I am very much looking forward to it. I hope it's a lot of fun. It will be my first event without Angie though and that makes me a little sad.

I hope you all sleep great tonight. And have a very good Saturday. I love you all very much. Goodnight!

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disco-elysium-via-polls · 1 year ago

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3. "So 'cool' guys protect businessmen while everyone else lives in the ruins? I can think of cooler things."

+1 Communism

SIILENG - "Yeah -- *cool* ruins," he agrees. "I get to sell quality goods like these by cutting out the middlemen. *You* don't have to rebuild your house. Live in a crater! Or in a tree!" He points to a tree. "*Where* can you do that? Only here."

3. "Is there a discount for cool officers like me?"

SIILENG - "No need for discounts at Siileng's, officer. Everything's already on sale." He nods towards the crates. "Anything you want, 50% off!"

4. "That's all then. Let me ask you something else."

SIILENG - "Anything for you..." He smiles again.

3. "Where are you from, Siileng?"

SIILENG - "Me? It's a boring story, officer. Who cares about the past? I'm all business now -- all Revachol."

"But you're not a local, are you?"

(Better not to mention.) "Sounds good. Let's get back to business then."

SIILENG - "Very sharp, officer. I'm Seraise, from the Siigay province of the Seraise Empire. The 'Apricot Suzerainty', you know?"

"Yum. Apricots are delicious."

"Why's it called that? Lots of apricots there?"

KIM KITSURAGI - "The *Apricot Suzerainty*," the lieutenant explains, "is what the Siigay archipelago is commonly known as in Revachol." He pauses. "It's a bit of a *fraught* term, I'm sure you understand."

SIILENG - "No-no, apricots come from Siigay," the vendor explains. "My grandma used to grow them. But Siigay is a shithole, that's why I came to Revachol. Here's much better for an independent entrepreneur. Less *laws*."

"Speaking of -- why not support an independent local entrepreneur? I send half my profits back to my grandma in Siigay."

EMPATHY [Medium: Success] - Well. If it's for his *grandma*... you should buy a lot of things.

3. [Rhetoric - Challenging 12] Persuade him to give you some money.

-1 Poor underprivileged grandma.

We have basically no chance of succeeding at this. Still, money is money, and we still don't have enough to pay Garte for tonight...

RHETORIC [Challenging: Failure] - No need to dress this one up, just tell him what you want.

"You. I want your money. Now."

SIILENG - "Oh, okay." Siileng stops, his face suddenly serious. "But why, officer?"

"Because I... am corrupt? I don't really remember how it works, though -- being corrupt, I mean."

"I don't know, it was just the only thing I could come up with in my head -- to ask you. I need to get money *somehow*."

SIILENG - "Ah, yes. Money is very important." The street vendor nods, dead-serious.

KIM KITSURAGI - "Are you trying to ask for a *bribe*? If so, you're not doing a very good job..." He looks at the vendor.

SIILENG - "Sorry, detective." The man grins as if the entire incident is already forgotten.

4. "I'll look around, thanks." [Leave.]

Siileng has three boxes of wares. Let's look through them.

PILE OF CLOTHES - There are clothes inside. Cheap second-hand clothes, smelling of strangers' body odours.

SIILENG - "Don't be shy, these are premium-class clothes! Good quality fabrics, best retro design! Save the economy with your style, officer!"

Browse through the box.

[Leave for now.]

PILE OF CLOTHES - You find your hands deep in tattered and faded garments made from weird polyester blends that make your body itch and sweat in all the wrong places.

SIILENG - "Economical, but also trendy!" the street vendor shouts. "Look first-hand, buy second-hand. Keep the economy moving!"

2. [Composure - Medium 10] Find something worth salvaging from that pile of rags.

We'll find a different item in here depending on whether we succeed or fail. This is a white check, though, so failing will allow us to retry it. I'd actually prefer to fail here, so I go to change. When I put on those jeans we found in Cindy's room, however...

INTERFACING - The pockets of these new jeans are perfect for sticking your hand into. Makes you look cool, calm, and collected. As your hand enters the pocket, your fingers brush against something… soft, yet crinkly.

Take the item out.

INTERFACING - Hey! It's a chewing gum wrapper. It reminds you of the fruity juice of apricots. You should inspect it closer if you have time. Something about the wrapper's texture is familiar...

We've been hearing a lot about apricots lately...

APRICOT CHEWING GUM WRAPPER

A gleaming chewing gum wrapper found in the pocket of the labourer jeans. It gives off an ever-so-faint scent of apricots... Your mouth starts watering.

>INTERACT

APRICOT CHEWING GUM WRAPPER- There it is again -- the scent of apricots, with a touch of cinnamon. Smells like the end of some distant summer. The surface of another planet, or some ancient temple.

Ancient temple?

End of summer...

Take a deep, *deep* breath.

[Put the wrapper away.]

APRICOT CHEWING GUM WRAPPER- Yes. From the height of antiquity. A long, long time ago. Millennia ago. On an island of time you can never return to.

2. End of summer...

APRICOT CHEWING GUM WRAPPER- The sun sets into the sea, but the water does not boil. Instead it turns to liquid gold. For a moment, the world's store of precious metals seems to increase dramatically, and you are rich...

There is a movement next to you. The shuffle of a small coat. Warm, like the evening. But when you turn toward it there's nothing there...

Where did it go?

Wait, come back!

APRICOT CHEWING GUM WRAPPER- Why are you talking to a gum wrapper?

3. Take a deep, *deep* breath.

APRICOT CHEWING GUM WRAPPER- Bitter, citrus, sweet, it seems to grow stronger, like a glow, with every breath you take...

... until a blossom of skin and flower petals erupts behind your closed eyes. Made of toffee, cream, and distance. You just *had* to take a dive.

Thought gained: Apricot Chewing Gum Scented One

INLAND EMPIRE [Easy: Success] - Feels so, so familiar.

4. [Put the wrapper away.]

APRICOT CHEWING GUM SCENTED ONE

Temporary research bonus: -1 Reaction Speed: Living in the past Research time: 5h 5m

PROBLEM: You have found a trace of *entity* who’s been stalking you across the planes. The gloom stalker, the conglomeration. The shadowy organization behind your downfall. (Possibly connected to the dreaded *ex*-something.) Granted, it is *impossible* to determine its true identity. But you *can* remember where you first smelled its treachery. Yes! Use the 'Tutti Frutti' gum wrapper -- reconstruct the day you first breathed in her untrustworthy atoms.

Anyway. Clothes.

SIILENG - "You keep coming back. That's good, officer! Keep browsing those clothes, keep saving that economy!"

COMPOSURE [Medium: Failure] - No good. All you can come up with are some treated wool pants. You can tell they're too tight around your thighs and too loose around the waist.

-1 Morale

Touch them.

Discard the woolly pants.

COMPOSURE - They itch. Like hell. Like an itch-pit in hell.

SIILENG - "All natural materials, see?" The street vendor interrupts, guiding your hand over the fabric. "Real wool, 100% skin-friendly! And they're yours for only 2 reál!"

Itchy Pants +2 Half-Light -1 Composure -1 Savoir Faire

These are super cheap, and as you can see, they'll allow us to pass Medium difficulty Half-Light checks.

3. [Cost: 2.00] "I want to buy those itchy pants."

SIILENG - "You won't regret it, officer!" The street vendor smiles broadly.

3. [Leave for now.]

Itchy Pants

+2 Half-Light: Itch-rage -1 Composure: Bees in your pants -1 Savoir Faire: Really uncomfortable

Itchy pants. These pants make you angry. Good LORD these pants are UNCOMFORTABLE. Punch someone in the face! They are striped and calf-length; too tight around thighs, too loose around waist -- the worst case scenario.

FALN SNEAKERS ON A PEDESTAL OF SPEAKERS - You see two lowly, defeated speakers. Thralls, slaves basically. Perched atop them like conquerors surveying the land: a pair of FALN durable-wear sneakers, 'Ultra' series.

Inspect the sneakers.

Inspect the speakers.

[Leave].

FALN SNEAKERS ON A PEDESTAL OF SPEAKERS - A pair of FALN 'Ultras.' The design is impossibly sleek and simple -- a futuristic silhouette with a sleek monochrome colourway, a jet black upper, and a silver-lined midsole.

SIILENG - "Those sneakers, mister..." the street vendor intones. "Those sneakers are the latest FALN sneakers. Super-rare, super-fine, super-cool -- only 50 reál!"

RHETORIC [Easy: Success] - Only?! That's madness.

We obviously cannot afford the sneakers.

2. Inspect the speakers.

FALN SNEAKERS ON A PEDESTAL OF SPEAKERS - These once-respectable speakers have been conquered, reduced to a mere prop by the indomitable FALN 'Ultras' atop them.

SIILENG - "No-no, don't look at the speakers, officer! Look at the *sneakers*!" The man points to the footwear. "The *sneakers* are the stars here!"

"But I already looked at the sneakers."

"What about the speakers though? Doesn't anyone want those speakers?"

"Poor little speakers." (Pat them.)

SIILENG - "Then look at them again! These are premium lifestyle sneakers, officer -- the best on the market!"

3. "Can't I just buy the sad, conquered Samaran speakers?"

SIILENG - "No way, officer, these aren't for sale. They're bad speakers, low-fi socialist junk."

#disco elysium #kim kitsuragi #siileng

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mylittleredgirl · 11 months ago

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[and the rest of the post!]

...... but her circumstances have recently changed.

by cutting frank out of her life (both because she wants a future he's not offering and because she wants to punish him; i have plenty of thoughts about that too), she has eliminated her only source of friendly human contact. she and frank bonded over being hated by everyone else! they encouraged that in each other! but now... she’s all alone.

hawkeye is now in the business of making digs on frank's behalf, and that's another social avenue closed off. she was becoming friendly with both hawkeye and b.j. — they're the first people she told about her engagement! — but (largely because of how clueless and obnoxious she was in that episode) frank got the swamp rats in the divorce, so to speak.

so she's lonely to the point of distress, but she's so boxed-in by her inflexible belief in power structures and has been terrorizing everyone since we met her, so she can't easily walk that back without... abandoning her hold on those power structures long enough to apologize (which i noticed she doesn't do in this episode, but when in her whole life would she have ever seen an authority figure apologize?). and taking a cheese grater to her ego, because it's not like people are going to immediately embrace her, so she'll deal with rejection while she tries to change.

and what if they make fun of her to her face instead of behind her back — which is worse??

i find it telling that they call her 'hot lips' when she's not around — and i'm sure she knows they do. in the script, the act one tent scene is much longer, and the nurses debrief the O.R. shitshow and then drag margaret for a page and a half before she arrives:

and then on-screen, when mary jo tries to protect gaynor (the one on the top bunk with dark hair):

sorry for the gazillion caps; i swear this is actually the readers' digest version oh my god

having this episode right after "lt. radar o'reilly" is such a brilliant accident, because dear sweet radar just put words to the tragedy and loneliness of military success. radar was jealous of the officers in theory, but is so much happier back among the grunts, because it's better to take disrespect and abuse from above together than to take it from below while isolated and alone.

from season 5 "lt. radar o'reilly":

which is exactly what's happening here!! margaret has wanted this promotion all her life, but she probably didn't picture having it in the middle of nowhere. she has no family waiting at home for her at night, no peers she can relate to, not even a terrible boyfriend in her tent anymore. she barely knows her absent fiancé; would she dare send him an honest letter about her day that isn't all sunshine and idealized presentation?

so with all that, whether or not she deserves it, i love that the nurses offer her an olive branch at the end.

earlier, margaret started the professional reconciliation by finally allying herself with the nurses and protecting them in front of colonel potter. it's long overdue; up until now, we have only seen variations of the opening O.R. scene, where she criticizes them in public instead of rising to their defense. this part of their dynamic is entirely on her to mend — no one else can help her.

and then, later...

the nurses are far more emotionally aware than she is. this is the best possible move they could make — it defuses another potential standoff, and it's their way of thanking margaret for letting baker off the hook. it shouldn't have to be up to them to change the culture and improve their relationship with their supervisor, but they're honestly more capable of it. and it's very sweet how margaret immediately responds.

the nurses are all adult women who value their social connection with each other, and they recognize someone in distress who doesn't really know how to initiate kindness, and took a chance to show her. <3 <3

i hope this improves things for everyone! i think it will! and i definitely hope margaret thinks long and hard about all this, because if she lets it, it could really change her life.

tl;dr: poorly socialized feral cat domesticated by the mortifying ordeal of being known and one (1) cup of terrible army coffee.

[i reblogged the tumblr post where i found the script here.]

i know some of you have been pressing your faces to the glass waiting for me to see this one in particular SO i saw "the nurses" the other night and am still thinking about it!!

i love love love it when characters get pushed to a point where you can almost see their childhood selves pop out, like are they even talking about what's happening right now? or are their 12-year-old hearts just screaming?? i love that margaret's outburst is both irrational (the hostile work environment is coming from inside the house; i was yelling at my tv "baby it's your fault!!!") and so so honest.

[this turned into a bit of a character thesis, so not only is there a readmore, there will also be a reblog soon with the rest of the post because i maxed out the image limit!]

this whole time, margaret has treated her subordinates with a heavy hand because she thinks it's the right and fair thing to do. the rules say this is how it works!

she maintains a high standard of excellence in brutal circumstances, but she's also reactive, moody, and unforgiving. she's often shown on the edge of losing control and authority, she inflames situations by overreacting, and the thing she punishes most egregiously is disrespect (toward frank, toward the army, toward herself). she intentionally underlines the distance between herself and the other nurses at every turn.

from season 3 "there's nothing like a nurse": [all IDs in alt]

really, everything she thinks and does comes from a place of "they're not supposed to like me," but the childish part of her that is completely unable to see her own behavior is confused and hurt because "i'm just doing my job so why don’t they like me???"

it's her job to maintain discipline, but especially here in 4077-land, she doesn't have to lead with the whip. henry was beloved because he was an overly permissive clown, which will never be her speed, but colonel potter has all the same training as she does. he's loved and respected as the Good Regular Army Guy because he leads with discernment and mutual respect.

it's easier for him. he's more experienced, he's respected and supported from above and below, and he has a calm temperament — which isn't nothing.

from season 4 "the interview":

whether she's aware of this as a problem or not, we at home can see how margaret's inability to control her emotional reactivity causes her as much grief as her inability to control other people.

if she were capable of laughing off small slights, hawkeye and trapper wouldn't have used her as a chew toy so much, and henry might have taken her real concerns more seriously if they weren't lost in the noise of daily fits, you know? she rarely started it, so i'm not blaming her for the hostile chaos circus of seasons 1-3, but i am saying she would have had a better time if she knew how to take a few deep breaths.

this description from the script, after the near-brawl in the nurses' tent in act one, is basically her character thesis statement:

and here, when she's reacting fully emotionally, the truth comes out! the reason that she won't be flexible and show compassion to the nurses isn't because of the rules, but because they're mean to her!!

that's obviously a very bad place to lead from. she has enormous institutional power over them, including controlling their freedom of movement, but she feels like all the other girls in school are hanging out together and they hate her. because they are! and they do! the fight in act one boils over when they make fun of her hair, and that sent all of them back to middle school.

and in many ways, that's where margaret's emotional maturity is stuck (which is, i think, why i find her so endearing). she can't see herself. she knows they don't like her, trust her, or want her around, but she doesn't understand how she dug this hole herself, or how to get out of it.

to add insult to jealous injury, one of the nurses (mary jo, who gets between margaret and baker to stop the fight and takes care of the others in different ways) is margaret's age, and the others look to her as their chosen leader and personal support.

and i'm sure margaret had NO IDEA this was the messy truth until she heard it come out of her mouth.

and her emotionally breaking on the "one lousy cup of coffee" in particular…

i wonder, how often does some version of that first tent scene happen? does she deliver their assignments every night? she walks in already defensive, they immediately stop laughing, and then... she either finds a reason to scold them or they ice her out until she leaves. (and they probably start laughing again as soon as she does!)

from her perspective, when she arrived for the dreaded sleepover and they turned out the lights the minute she walked in, it's like they cancelled the nightly coffee klatch just to avoid spending one social minute with her.

i also think the nurses are right when they assumed that she wouldn't have accepted an invitation to hang out with them (and might even have snapped at them for being inappropriate for asking). she doesn't cross that emotional line, even when she should — she didn't know gaynor was spiraling after losing so many patients in a row, and didn't respond compassionately when she learned.

has she ever invited them for coffee or a friendly chat? no.

...... but her circumstances have recently changed.

[reblog coming soon with the rest of it!]

#whew!!!!#apparently i think about her a normal amount #i want you all to know how very restrained i was actually in keeping this to the episode and not pouring out all my ill-informed headcanons #since i have seven seasons left of character knowledge still to go #but i can't help imagining what margaret's experience was as a junior officer herself because i suspect it was the time of her life #and maybe she had a supervisor who was also super strict (which would help her thrive!) but was more fair about it #(and probably didn't have a frank burns around to constantly defend on the job)#so margaret would have loved this supervisor and seen her colleagues do the same even though they got tough love in return #and so margaret just doesn't see the difference -- so is stuck in the 'why don't they like me?????' and can't see the answer #(even though the answer is so! obvious! to everyone else!!!)#mashblogging #margaret houlihan #<- in case anyone is coming from afar and sees this i don't usually use character tags it's all just a mashblogging junk drawer #so feel free to dig around the rubber bands and paper clips #mash #edit: whoops forgot two caps they're in there now #deep dives

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twinhood-2dot0 · 2 years ago

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the entire history of the dceu, i guess

I wanted to write about the entire history of Batman or The Flash but uh, their histories might take a whole book to write. Then I thought of Batgirl, but uh, as much as I love her, I’m only really familiar with her later Oracle days and her Batgirl days from 2011-2018, whereas in the case of the other two mentioned I’ve read pretty much every consequential issue (am I flexing? maybe). I am gonna try to read every single comic she’s in though :P. Huh, it’s only 61 TPBs. The list is not complete, but if we factor in all those that I’ve already read and those yet to read, I think they level out. There are probably much more complete lists, but I can’t find any as easily scrapable ones.

Man Of Steel (2013)

Budget: $225–258 million

Box Office: $668 million

IMDb: 7.1/10

Rotten Tomatoes: Critics: 56% Audience:75%

(Note: None of these are actual metrics for how good the movies are, you’ll see why I’m including those.)

In 2008, after WB’s disappointment with the box office of the sixth instalment in the Superman series, they decided to reboot the film series.

The writer for The Dark Knight trilogy, David S. Goyer, expressed his idea for a Superman movie to Christopher Nolan, and impressed, Nolan pitched the idea to the studio, and were both hired to write and produce the movie respectively. A few directors were considered, notably Ben Affleck (Batman, in the future) and Matt Reeves (directed The Batman, in the future), but ultimately Zack Snyder was chosen in 2010. There was an idea to set the movie in the TDK trilogy universe, but it was decided against (thank god for that, please, the movies are perfect as is). Anyways, the movie was a box office success, even while critical responses were not so much. Okay, well, it’s Superman, so it’s not very unexpected. I, for one, am not a huge fan of the movie. As much as I looooove darker stories, come on, it’s Superman, the paragon of hope! It’s not a terrible movie, but as a Superman movie, yeah, no. Anyways, seeing the success of the movie, they went along with their idea for a connected universe.

I’ll write a summary for the plot below every movie’s sections, skip if you don’t want to be spoiled. You know what, just read it through. There’s nothing much very consequential since the axing of Zack Snyder’s Justice League, and like every superhero is gonna be recast and rebooted, so it doesn’t matter.

Plot: Basically a Superman origin story. If you don’t remember, you can go back to my shallow dive into the Justice League :) The villain is Zod, who wants to terraform (Kryptoform?) Earth and make it habitable for Kryptonians. And Superman also has uhhh the genetic code to fabricate baby Kryptonians placed in him? Which Zod wants to use to repopulate.

Batman v. Superman: Dawn Of Justice (2016)

Budget: $250–300 million

Box Office: $873.6 million

IMDb: 6.4/10

Rotten Tomatoes: C: 29% A: 63% (Yikes)

In 2013, it was announced that Zack Snyder is going to be returning for a Man Of Steel sequel, and later confirmed by Snyder that Batman and Superman (and Wonder Woman) were going to meet for the first time on the big screen and that it was going to be inspired by Frank Miller’s The Dark Knight Returns comic, which depicts an older, more brutal Batman.

You can see that clearly in the suit.

The movie opened to a whopping $422.5 million and then experienced an 81.2% decline in its second weekend. The movie seems to have been carried by the hype for Batman and Superman, like wow.

The Rotten Tomatoes website's critical consensus reads: "Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice smothers a potentially powerful story – and some of America's most iconic superheroes – in a grim whirlwind of effects-driven action." I, too, disliked the movie. I am quite a new DC fan, but even for me, it felt like it butchered the characters of Batman and Superman, although Superman to a lesser extent. Batman kills??? And why exactly does he want to kill Superman??? Also, that plot point would have been made more impactful if Batman didn’t kill freaking goons???

Wow uh, that’s quite a few Golden Raspberries. Yikes, even Catwoman won 4.

Plot: Superman’s fight with Zod created a lot of collateral damage and also destroyed the Wayne Enterprises building, so Batman resents Superman. Lex Luthor manipulates them into hating each other, and he ransoms Superman’s mom to get him to kill Batman. Superman tries to talk to Batman and Batman attacks??? (he got kryptonite). Batman comes to his senses just before he deals the killing blow. Superman confronts Luthor, and Luthor unleashes Doomsday, a monster designed to kill Superman using Kryptonian DNA. Wonder Woman appears. Superman and Doomsday kill each other. Everyone big sad. The End.

Suicide Squad (2016)

Budget: $175 million

Box Office: $747 million

IMDb: 5.9/10

Rotten Tomatoes: C: 26% A: 58%

The film was announced in 2009 and David Ayer signed on to direct in 2014. Ah, where do I begin? The movie was set to have a sombre tone, but with the failure of BvS and the success of Deadpool, the studio worked on a second, lighter cut than Ayer’s and then tried to reach a place of “consensus” between the two. The reshoots cost around $22 million, more than the typical $6-$10 million, and changed the entire third act, and changed Joker and Harley’s relationship to be less abusive??? Thankfully, Birds Of Prey later remedied that, but the emancipation of Harley Quinn would have been much better had it been preserved in Suicide Squad.

The movie was a box office success, but the movie is regarded as possibly the worst DC film made, which is not an easy feat, as much as I hate to admit it.

I have no comments on this movie. Because I have no memory of when I watched this movie, except for Harley Quinn and how badly the movie treated her. Huh. I don’t remember anything except for Harley Quinn. Wow. That is quite a feat considering how much I love the Suicide Squad from the comics and individual characters like Captain Boomerang, Katana, and Killer Croc. Oh yeah, and Amanda Waller. She’s an awesome character in every version, and Viola Davis does a great job.

Plot: Superman dies, so Amanda Waller creates Task Force X, a team made up of supervillains forced to do Waller's bidding because of a bomb injected in their neck that she can detonate at any time. An archaeologist becomes possessed by a witch named Enchantress. Turns the city into monsters, summons brother to destroy mankind, the Suicide Squad beat Enchantress, yada yada, I’ll fall asleep if I’m forced to read this, just read it here

Wonder Woman (2017)

Budget: $120–150 million

Box office: $822.8 million

IMDb: 7.4/10 (wow I thought it would be higher than that)

Rotten Tomatoes: C: 93% A: 83% (You can see why I thought that)

DC’s first gem. Heralded as DCEU’s best film, the film was a hit among critics and the audience.

Plans for a Wonder Woman film date back to 1996. After going through a lot of directors and actresses, Patty Jenkins took up the role of director in 2015 and Gal Gadot was casted by Zack Snyder to appear in BvS in 2013. This movie is also an origin story, set in the 1910s in World War I.

Also, listen to this

I loved this so much. I got into DC in 2018, so this movie was my first exposure to Wonder Woman, and oh boy was it a good one. The acting was awesome, the action scenes were perfect, humour and romance weren’t overbearing and bettered the film.

Plot: Princess Diana is a resident of Themyscira, an island of immortal women and only women. The island is usually shrouded from the outside world, but one day, an American pilot named Steve Trevor crashlands into the island and is followed by German forces who were pursuing him. The Themyscirans fight them off but incur heavy losses. Steve is interrogated using the Lasso Of Truth/Hestia and reveals that there is a war going on in the “land of man”, as the Themyscirans call it, and Diana convinces Hippolyta (oh whoops, I forgot to mention, Themyscirans are Amazons, at least, a sect of them. It’s the same Hippolyta from Greek myth, but modified to fit the story. She’s Diana’s mom. Antiope is also there, but she’s killed off.) to let her go and stop the war, believing that Ares is behind it. And she arms herself with the lasso, a “god-killer” sword, and the armour, and leaves for London. She fights Ares. Steve sacrifices himself, and Wonder Woman beats Ares, WWI is over.

Justice League (2017) and Zack Snyder’s Justice League (2021)

Budget: $275 + $25 (reshoots) million

Box Office: $657.9 million

IMDb: 6.1/10

Rotten Tomatoes: C: 39% A: 67%

The biggest disappointment in comic book movie history. After the release of Man Of Steel, Goyer was hired again to write a sequel (BvS) and a Justice League movie. In 2014, it was announced that Zack Snyder would be directing the movie. The production went along and filming wrapped up in Oct 2016. However, in the wake of Snyder’s daughter’s death, he had to step down. They then hired Joss Whedon, the director of Avengers and Avengers: Age Of Ultron, seeing the success of those movies. Under his direction, it went through two months of reshoots costing $25 million. The reshoots coincided with the filming of Mission Impossible: Fallout so Henry Cavill was contractually obligated to keep a moustache for it, so uh… His moustache had to be digitally removed which led to uh…

Justice League - Opening Superman Scene - Mustache Movieclip

Anyways, there were a lot of changes made. There are multiple sources estimating how much was changed. The producer said in an interview that the film was shot originally by eighty to eighty-five percent. I’m too dumb to understand what that means, maybe you’ll be able to. Snyder said around a fourth from what he had been told (he didn’t watch the movie), and the cinematographer said 10%. Whedon’s rewrites were also around 80 pages, so it was mostly his work. The movie was mandated by execs to be under 2 hours, which is the dumbest freaking decision, considering the only superheroes in the movie we’ve met so far are Batman, Superman, and Wonder Woman.

Controversy and Changes

It was later reported that Snyder’s rough cut was deemed unwatchable by studio execs.

Ray Fisher, the actor for Cyborg, and Gal Gadot, Wonder Woman, came out with claims against Joss Whedon, with Fisher saying “Joss Wheadon’s on-set treatment of the cast and crew of Justice League was gross, abusive, unprofessional, and completely unacceptable.” and Gadot claiming that Whedon threatened her career if she refused to do something.

There’s a controversial scene in AvengersAoU where in the chaos of Ultron’s attack, Bruce Banner (Hulk) falls on Black Widow’s chest. It’s a horrible sexist thing to have in your movie already, but even more egregious is that he does the exact same thing in Justice League with The Flash falling on Wonder Woman’s chest. Gadot refused to do this scene and it had to be filmed with a double. Seriously dude? You didn’t reconsider after the actor said no?

Chris Terrio considered the Whedon cut an act of vandalism and unsuccessfully tried to get his name removed from the movie.

The Whedon cut was significantly lighter in tone and featured much less violence as the studio was not happy with the results of the previous darker movies, and you know, it is directed by the director of Avengers.

Tom “Junkie XL” Holkenberg completely scored the movie, but halfway into post-production, was replaced by Danny Elfman, composer of Batman (1989) and Batman Returns (1992).

The movie was exactly 2 hours, removing 90 minutes of Snyder footage, but still adhering to the basic outline

Christopher Nolan and Deborah Snyder (his wife and producer) advised him never to watch the film as it would break his heart. I see what she means, it broke my heart as a huge DC fan, imagine being the creator of a work that you poured blood, sweat and tears into and someone else comes in and completely butchers it.

The underperformance led to the studio deciding to ditch Snyder’s vision for a universe of interconnected films to focus on solo movies.

Zack Snyder’s Justice League

Budget: $70 million to finish the movie

Box Office: Direct-to-video

IMDb: 8.0/10

Rotten Tomatoes: C: 71% A: 93%

#ReleaseTheSnyderCut

After the release of the “Josstice League”, fans created a petition to #ReleaseTheSnyderCut that gained more than 180,000 signatures. Various members of the cast showed support for the movement.

Ahead of San Diego Comic Con 2019, a crowdfunding campaign was started, with half to be spent on advertising and the other half going to the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention. They purchased ad space on billboards, two in Times Square and a flying banner ad that passed over WB Studios. The fans raised over $500,000 for the ASFP in donations by Feb 2021.

In March 2019, Snyder confirmed that his original cut existed, but that it was up to the studio to release it. The following month, he posted a photo of boxes with tapes labelled “Z.S.J.L. Director’s Cut” captioned “Is it real? Does it exist? Of course it does.”

The studio approached Snyder proposing to release the cut unfinished as he had left it, but he refused, insisting on finishing it if it was to be released. In Feb 2020, WB decided to move forward. In May 2020, Snyder announced that his cut titled “Zack Snyder’s Justice League” would be released on HBO Max in 2021.

Differences

At least 10 comic characters were cut, including but not limited to, Iris West, The Flash’s wife, Ryan Choi, the not-yet Atom, and Darkseid, the big bad of the Justice League, basically DC’s Thanos (technically, Darkseid came before, but not in live-action media, so :P) and Martian Manhunter, a main member of the Justice League.

A lot of the backstory for the new characters like Aquaman, The Flash, and Cyborg. Cyborg was supposed to be the “heart” of the story, but he had barely any character in the Whedon cut. The Flash is relegated to just comic relief and has pretty much no role in the climax when he had a huge role. Aquaman’s backstory was also cut, but it’s less egregious because of the existence of the solo movie. Even Batman was affected. He is more indecisive, oafish, and obsessive, while in Snyder’s cut, he’s more optimistic and inspired by Superman’s sacrifice. His dynamic with Wonder Woman was also similarly butchered, and she was very sexually objectified.

This was cut. Do I need to elaborate? Well, there is symbolism, but eh I’m lazy. Also, this is a reference to “The Death Of Superman.” storyline.

Just look at this. He went from a menacing alien monster to man in armour. His character was similarly butchered. I’ll expand on the plot section.

Dumb freaking jokes and quips. Marvel style. Except it doesn’t work at all in this movie. In the MCU the audience is used to that tone. Shoe-horning in jokes in a movie that was meant to be dark doesn’t work at all, especially when they make no sense and are just plain unfunny.

Zack Snyder’s Justice League has 4 hours of runtime. Snyder was given free rein, and he made full use of that. It has a lot of his signature slow-mo scenes, and there are a lot more details too because of that.

Story Differences

The outline of the plot is basically the same, but every character is very fleshed out. We see how Victor Stone turned into the Cyborg, his relationship with his parents, how his powers work, etc, and the same treatment is given to Flash and Aquaman. Cyborg did very little in the theatrical cut, but he’s a decent character in the Snyder cut.

The theatrical version of Steppenwolf was probably the worst villain in comic book movies, but Snyder’s version fleshed him out and has much more of a motivation. In the theatrical cut he wants to destroy Earth for seemingly no reason, and there’s no mention of the Anti-Life equation, which is like Darkseid’s signature weapon. Steppenwolf is on Earth to gain Darkseid’s favour again after betraying him in the past, and he finds out that the Anti-Life Equation is in the Earth’s core.

Oh yeah, the climax. I’ll talk about it when I explain the plot because it’s the biggest change.

Plot:

Blue text is only in Snyder cut, red is only in Josstice League, and white text is in both movies.

Thousands of years ago, Darkseid Steppenwolf came to Earth to destroy it in search of the Anti-Life equation and to build his parademon army. But the Atlanteans, Amazons, and humanity came together to defeat them, and his three Mother Boxes were confiscated, and each tribe stored them away safely. In the present day, sensing Superman, Earth’s protector’s death, the Mother Boxes call out to Steppenwolf, and he arrives in Themyscira, defeats the Amazons, and steals their Mother Box, and Diana is alerted, and she finds out about the war against Darkseid. She and Bruce team up to gather other metahumans to fight an incoming threat that Lex Luthor warned Bruce about in the previous movie and one that the Parademon's presence made obvious. Bruce first goes to Aquaman, but he refuses. Then Diana goes to Cyborg, who also refuses, but he returns home to find his place ransacked and dad missing, and Bruce successfully recruits Barry because… he needed friends. Honestly, mood.

Then, the Atlantean outpost is attacked and Mera and Aquaman fail to protect the Mother Box. Then the team received intel from Jim Gordon, while Cyborg joins them, and they discover Steppenwolf’s hideout under the Gotham Harbor, where he’s interrogating S.T.A.R Labs employees, one of them being Silas Stone, Victor’s dad. They fight Steppenwolf, and in the process, the facility is flooded, when Aquaman arrives and buys them time to escape. The team retrieves the Mother Box Silas used to rebuild Victor’s body after he met with a car accident, and the team realizes they could bring Superman back with it. They exhume Superman’s body and revive him in the Kryptonian ship that he arrived on Earth in. An amnesiac Superman then attacks the team and comes to his senses when Lois Lane arrives at the scene. Steppenwolf arrives at S.T.A.R Labs and tries to take the Mother Box when Silas sacrifices himself to superheat the Mother Box. This allows the team to locate the Mother Box using its heat signature. The team travels to an abandoned Russian city, a renamed Pripyat. I swear, this will be relevant. Aquaman and Wonder Woman fight off Steppenwolf, while Cyborg is separating the Mother Boxes (oops, I forgot, if the Mother Boxes conjoin and create a Unity, the Earth is razed and everyone is turned into parademons.), and Batman and The Flash fights off parademons and later rescues a family of people trying to escape whatever Steppenwolf is doing to the place. Okay, so 1. This is an abandoned town hit with a nuclear meltdown. 2. This messes with continuity. The Flash (2023) and ZSJL establish that he cannot relocate people. In the former, it is explicitly stated, and in the latter, it’s shown to us, when he just helps people along to escape in the Gotham Harbor fight, and he saves Iris with small taps. 3. The Flash barely has a role. I’m not saving people is not a vital thing to do, but like, look at what everyone else is doing! Also, they cut such a badass scene to make… whatever the heck we got. Meanwhile, Barry is circling the area to build up a charge to separate the Mother Boxes. Steppenwolf then overpowers the two of them, stabs Victor and rips him away from the Mother Boxes and then Superman arrives with the cheesiest line.

Steppenwolf: They’re too weak to see the truth.

Superman: Well… I believe in truth. But I’m also a fan of Justice.

And proceeds to curb-stomp Steppenwolf. Yes, I know it’s a reference to “Truth, Justice and The American Way” but eugh, could have been done so much better. Especially when you see what they cut to make that scene.

Superman then leaves to… relocate… a freaking building full of civilians. It’s like the movie forgot that it was supposed to be abandoned. Also, do I need to explain what’s wrong with this?

swings at Victor, when Superman lands in front of him, and says “Not impressed.”, and proceeds to curbstomp Steppenwolf.

Just look at this and tell me which one is badass.

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Victor keeps getting interrupted by Steppenwolf, so Barry is unable to charge it, but by the time Superman arrives and Victor gets back in position, Barry gets shot, and the Mother Boxes form Unity, and the Earth is destroyed… until this happens. I don’t want to describe this scene, it’s that good.

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Whoo, goosebumps. This here is the scene that Whedon cut out to make him save a random family. Instead of the Earth, and quite possibly multiple planets. And provided a payoff to the scene where he turns back time just a little bit earlier in the movie. And set up The Flash movie. And it felt so good to have him finally play a role after being comic relief for the whole movie.

After the fight, a few things happen. 1. Bruce has a Knightmare (get it? Cuz The Dark Knight is having a nightmare? Yeah… not subtle at all.) where Superman has established an authoritarian role and Batman is teamed up with Joker and most everyone else is dead. 2. Martian Manhunter reveals himself to Bruce and offers to help when the time comes. 3. Lex Luthor tells Deathstroke Batman’s identity to help him kill him.

Ooooookkkkkkaaaaayyyyy that was long. Still alive? Good. We are only halfway done.

Aquaman (2018)

Budget: $160–200 million

Box Office: $1.148 billion (Wow.)

IMDb: 6.8/10

Rotten Tomatoes: C:65% A: 72%

Huh did not expect that. DC’s highest grossing movie is Aquaman. Aquaman, the butt of every Justice League joke. Aquaman performed better than Batman v. Superman, a movie with two of the most iconic superheroes ever, and Justice League, the team of the most iconic superheroes. Okay, well, the movies themselves were not very good, but like, Aquaman. Sorry, I just can’t get over that fact. I personally love like (let’s not go that far. Despite being King of Atlantis and my love for the ocean, he’s still not very likeable in the comics. The movies are good though, they do his abrasiveness quite well.) Aquaman (No, it’s not just because of Jason Momoa’s abs, shuddup), but he never struck me as a very popular character.

This movie is a sort of origin story..? This movie takes place after Justice League, where he was man with trident who talked to fish, while in this movie he comes into his role as King of Atlantis.

I loved the movie. Obviously. I loved Jason Momoa’s acting, I love his characterization, his character arc, I love how well the underwater CGI is done, I loved Atlantis, the adaptation of Black Manta, Orm is good enough. Especially after reading the comics.

Plot: Origin story. Not very many additions, but it includes Black Manta’s origins, a son of a pirate that Aquaman refused to save, and now he made his life’s mission hunting him down. Never really liked him, kind of a boring villain writing, just look at Reverse Flash to see how well it can be accomplished.

Shazam! (2019)

Budget: $90–100 million

Box Office: $367.7 million

IMDb: 7/10

Rotten Tomatoes: C: 90% A: 82% (Wow, critics score higher than audience.)

From the supposedly “dark” franchise, we get a comedy film. Okay, well, the main character is a teenage kid, would be dumb to make it dark. Okay, I take that back, Damian Wayne stories are about a pre-teen kid, and do they get dark sometimes. Anyways, it’s a pretty funny movie, not very deep, but enjoyable and a reprieve. I just realized I missed Shazam! in my Justice League shallow dive :P. Well, this will be good enough ig. Also, did you know Shazam! was called Captain Marvel? Well, he still is, sometimes, but they can’t market him as Captain Marvel. It is a little off-topic, but let me take you back to the 1940s. In the 1940s, Captain Marvel was the most popular superhero around, outselling even Superman. This led to DC getting salty, and they decided to sue Fawcett Comics, then owner of the character, for infringing their copyright for Superman. In 1941 DC tried unsuccessfully to stop Fawcett from publishing them and from Republic Films from releasing a serial based on the character. Fawcett won, due to a technicality, but found that he was indeed an illegal copy. Then in 1951, DC appealed the decision, and due to the drop in comic sales, Fawcett decided it was not worth fighting and paid DC for damages and dissolved its comics in the coming years, and in 1967 Marvel trademarked the name in 1972 and that was an issue when DC licensed the rights to all Fawcett characters, and that led to them retitling it to Shazam!. Anyways, sorry for lengthening this already gigantic post.

I liked the movie. It does its job as a comedy superhero film pretty well, and it’s a good adaptation of him. Yeah, nothing much to say here.

Plot: Billy Batson is a kid in the foster system, who keeps running away from foster homes in search of his mother, and he eventually lands in the house of Víctor and Rosa Vásquez with five other children, Mary Bromfield, Pedro Peña, Eugene Choi, Darla Dudley, and superhero enthusiast Freddy Freeman. He gets selected by a wizard to be his new champion, giving him the ability to turn into an adult man who has the Wisdom of Solomon, the Strength of Hercules, the Stamina of Atlas, the Lightning of Zeus, the Courage of Achilles, and the Speed of Mercury (I do not know why the first is Christian, the next five Greek and the last Roman. Although, I guess Shazah doesn’t have the same ring to it.)

In a flashback at the beginning of the movie, we see Thaddeus Sivana also tested by the wizard but is rejected because of his greed, and he lives the rest of his life consumed by anger due to that.

Sivana deduces his identity, and he takes his foster sibling hostage in exchange for the power, but he shares his powers with them and they team up to beat Sivana.

Birds Of Prey And The Fantabulous Emancipation of One Harley Quinn (2020)

Budget: $82-100 million

Box Office: $205.3 million

IMDb: 6.1/10

RT: C: 79% A: 78%

The film adaptation of my personal favourite DC teams. I mean, an all-girls (most of the time) team with Batgirl and Black Canary (most of the time)?

Margot Robbie, the actress for Harley Quinn, pitched the idea for a Harley Quinn spin-off in 2015, before the release of Suicide Squad, as "an R-rated girl gang film including Harley because I was like, 'Harley needs friends.'” She spent 3 years working on it and WB decided to make and it hired Cathy Yan, which makes this one of the few superhero films directed by a woman of colour. Batgirl was excluded from the movie for her standalone film. Huh, I thought it was because she was a problematic character to adapt. In 2018 it was announced that the lineup would include Huntress, Black Canary, and Renee Montoya. I refuse to call her Cassandra Cain. With so many things that the movie did right, Cassandra Cain is not it. She has 0 characteristics of the comic book character and I’m not even being hyperbolic. Seriously, I dare you to find one similarity. I’ll just be calling her uhhh Pickpocket. Yeah, that’s good enough.

I watched the movie again today, and oh my god, it. is. AWESOME! Harley Quinn is awesome, obviously. Huntress, oh my god, she’s my new celeb crush.

She’s soooo badass. She has this arc like, she just got into the role, and is trying so hard to be badass, practising in the mirror, saying stuff like “Do you know who I am?”, and “They call me… The Huntress.” It’s also a running gag that whenever she says “They call me…” the other party replies “The Crossbow Killer” and “Helena Bertinelli!”. But she’s so badass when she’s not trying, true to the comics version.

Renee is also cool, a little older tho, but that’s fine.

Oh, Black Canary was soooo good too. A pretty good adaptation, though not truly comic-accurate.

Cassandra Cain. Just read my Batfamily shallow dive, and read her character here. You’ll see why I refuse to call her Cassandra Cain.

Plot: Years ago, all of the Bertinelli family is gunned down for their fortune, but Helena survives and is taken in and trained as an assassin, and is trying to kill all the people responsible for the massacre of her family (The plot is pretty uhh back-and-forthey, and it keeps switching between flashbacks and the present, so I’m going to try to do this chronologically).

Dinah Lance breaks Roman Sionis’s (Black Mask, played by… Ewan McGregor… Obi-Wan Kenobi. I’m sorry when he commits all these evil deeds I can’t see anyone but Obi-Wan Kenobi. Not his fault, I’m just really bad at not relating it to actors’ past roles.) driver’s legs and is hired by him to be his new driver.

GCPD detective Renee Montoya is investigating the “Crossbow Killer” murders and tries to recruit Dinah as an informant, but she refuses.

Four years after the events of Suicide Squad, Joker and Harley break up, and because no one believed that they were actually broken up, Harley drives a truck into ACE Chemicals, “publicly announcing her relationship status”.

Sionis sends Victor Zsasz and Dinah to retrieve a diamond embedded with the account numbers to the Bertinelli Fortune, but Pickpocket steals it, but she’s caught by the police, so she swallows it.

Harley is kidnapped by Sionis’s men, and she offers to steal the diamond back, and after she’s sent to retrieve it, a bounty is placed on Pickpocket. Harley breaks into the GCPD and rescues Cassandra. They hide out at Harley’s apartment, which is bombed by Sionis’s men. Harley calls Sionis to exchange Pickpocket for his protection, Dinah notifies Montoya, Zsasz tells Sionis about her betrayal, and Sionis dons his eponymous “Black Mask” and decides to go after them at Amusement Mile.

At the park, Montoya confronts Harley, but they fight and Montoya is defenestrated. Zsasz arrives and shoots Harley with a tranq, and holds Dinah at gunpoint when he arrives, but he’s shot by Helena. Montoya returns and tells Helena that Sionis orchestrated the massacre when Sionis arrives with an army of henchmen. They fight, but Pickpocket is caught, and Harley and Huntress try to save her. Pickpocket reveals that she had a grenade in hand, and blows Sionis up, in the only scene that I could think of that gave this movie an R rating, aside from the f words. Montoya quits the GCPD, and Helena, Dinah and Montoya create the crimefighting team of Birds Of Prey.

Wonder Woman 1984 (2020)

Budget: $200 million

Box Office: $169.6 million

IMDb: 5.4/10

Rotten Tomatoes: C: 58% A: 73%

Plot: Diana gets a wishing stone, wishes for Steve Trevor back, and he comes back… in another man’s body??? And they have sex while he is in another man’s body??? Yeah, I don’t know how no one saw any issue with that. A woman jealous of Diana’s beauty and popularity wishes to be like her, and turns into a Cheetah, a businessman named Maxwell Lord gets the stone, saves his company, makes everyone in the world wish for anything and chaos unfolds and Diana renounces her wish and Steve is gone, Wonder Woman and Cheetah fight, Max and Diana fight, everyone renounces their wish, the end.

(Yeah, I’m in a rush, and this movie is too terrible for me to put any effort into it. Sorry.)

The Suicide Squad (2021)

Budget: $185 million

Box Office: $168.7 million

IMDb: 7.2/10

Rotten Tomatoes: C: 90% A: 82%

Yeah, confusing name, I know, but it’s more of a relaunch than a direct sequel.

This is the movie I said where the box office will be relevant. For such a critically acclaimed movie, it grossed only $168 million, the lowest of any DCEU film.

In 2018, James Gunn, director of Guardians Of The Galaxy Vol. 1-3, and several other… let’s just say interesting films, and now co-CEO of DC Films. I didn’t really know much about him, until recently, except that he directed an awesome DC movie, and he’s possibly the best person to take DC forward according to other people.

How James Gunn Deradicalizes the Manosphere | A RETROSPECTIVE

Watch this to see why I love him so much now. Oh wait oops um… His movies have some pretty… disturbing imagery, so uh only watch it if you’re up for that…. Which you probably definitely aren’t.

DC first asked him to make a Superman movie, which he said he didn’t know if he wanted to make, so they told him he could adapt any DC property he wanted to, and he chose Suicide Squad.

He also insisted on an R-rating, which I love it for. The movie would not be the same without the gratuitous violence. Yeahhh, I did a full 180 from cringing at amputations to loving gratuitous violence. Wow. Who knew I’d be here? I mean okay, it’s obviously where I’d have been, after reading Attack On Titan and Chainsaw Man and DC Black Label stuff.

He took inspiration from John Ostrander’s 1980s Suicide Squad run, drawn to it because of its loser B-grade supervillains.

The first character he chose was King Shark, who was supposed to be in the first movie but was replaced by Killer Croc, and the others added were Peacemaker, Polka-Dot Man, and a gender-swapped Ratcatcher.

He chose Starro The Conqueror as the villain, who struck him as absurd but terrifying, reflecting what he wanted to do with the film.

I don’t really care much for actors, but there’s one actor I’ve loved for a long time. David Dastmalchian, Polka-Dot Man. Why do I love this guy you haven’t ever heard about? Well, look at his roles.

The Dark Knight (2008) - Thomas Schiff, one of Joker’s deranged henchmen.

Ant-Man (2015), Ant-Man and The Wasp (2018), What If..? Episode 5 (2021), Ant-Man and The Wasp: Quantumania - Kurt, (in the first three ) one of Ant-Man’s friends, and in the latter movie, a being named… Veb?

Gotham (2017) - Dwight Pollard, one of Joker’s followers.

The Flash (2017, 2021) - Abra Kabadra, a Flash villain who’s a technomagician.

Batman: The Long Halloween, Part One and Two (2021) - Julian Day (Calendar Man), Oswald Cobblepot (Penguin)

The Suicide Squad (2021)

Yep, he played 8 different roles in superhero movies and 6 in various DC media. If I were an actress, I would want a resume just like that.

David Dastmalchian suffered from bullying due to his vitiligo in his childhood and developed depression and addiction, and comics gave him much-needed escapism and became somewhat of a comic devotee.

He first auditioned for a member of the Joker crew in the famous heist scene from The Dark Knight, but he didn’t get the part and was devastated. Four months later, however, he received a call that he was cast as Thomas Schiff. A small role, but one he credits with changing his life.

That’s why he was perfect for the role of Polka-Dot Man. Gunn wrote the character with Dastmalchian in mind.

Gunn messaged him saying that he wanted him in his film, and he was wrought with anticipation for what role he was going to play.

“I am very familiar with so much of the DC canon, and I know the DC villains so well, and he’s like, ‘I want you to be Abner Krill, Polka-Dot Man,'” Dastmalchian recalled. “I was so embarrassed. And I’m like, ‘James, I’m so sorry. I don’t know anything about him.’ He’s like, ‘Don’t worry, don’t worry. I want you to read the script and let me know how you feel.'”

“I was jumping up and down. I was crying. I was yelling,” Dastmalchian said. “I was so moved by what I read, and I was so moved by the thought that he would imagine me getting to bring to life a character that was beautifully created. James told me that when he was writing the character, he just saw me in his place.”

Polka-Dot Man’s abusive mother infected him with an alien virus, to turn him into a superhero, but it left him covered in polka dots and pustules, leading to ridicule and bullying. You can see how he could connect with a character like that.

“I connected with Abner from his first line,” he says. Dastmalchian sees Polka-Dot Man as an avatar for triumph against one’s insecurities.

“I love that Abner came to a point where he not only embraces his strangeness, he turns it into a superpower,” Dastmalchian says. “That’s what we all can do. We have things about ourselves that make us insecure, that make us ashamed. We keep things locked up, and they end up eating us from the inside.”

“We can do the work, get therapy or connect with people that help expel those viruses,” he explains. “We can love ourselves and figure we are meant to be the way we are. We’re fucking superheroes.”

Also, Peacemaker is John Cena.

It’s such a great movie, I was shocked to learn that it was the lowest-grossing DC movie. I guess an R-rating, a pandemic, a terrible prequel and a simultaneous streaming release will do that.

It’s a hilarious, gory, self-aware, ridiculous movie and an awesome adaptation of lesser-known DC supervillains that have been given a new lease on life. And also, Harley Quinn is great, obviously.

Plot: Amanda Waller assembles two Task Force X teams, who are sent to the island nation of Corto Maltese, unaware of each other. The movie goes into quite a bit of effort building character, to unceremoniously annihilate them, but Colonel Rick Flag and Harley Quinn survive. Their massacre provided a distraction for the other team to arrive safely. The team is commanded to find Flag and Harley Quinn, and massacre a soldier base, only to find out it belonged to a rebel group. Harley is captured by the dictator who is in love with Harley. Harley, after her experience with Joker, kills him and in a ridiculously over-the-top, awesome action sequence escapes to find… the others executing a “really good plan” to rescue her. She joins them and finds out that the Project Starfish, whose files they were there to destroy, was funded by the US Government, and the team splits, with one side dedicated to their mission, and the other who wanted to expose the secret. Peacemaker, on the former side, kills Flag but is killed by Bloodsport before he could kill Ratcatcher. Then Starro escapes and starts controlling the cities’ population. Waller orders them to leave, deeming the mission complete, but they revolt, and when Waller was about to detonate the bombs, she is knocked out by a member of the team, and directs them to defeat Starro. In a post-credits scene, the revolters are punished by assigning them to a new mission with Peacemaker, who is revealed to be alive.

Peacemaker (2021)

IMDb: 8.3/10

Rotten Tomatoes: C: 94% A: 89%

A spin-off series set after the events of The Suicide Squad directed by James Gunn.

It follows Peacemaker and Waller’s subordinates punished for insubordination by having to work with Peacemaker. I won’t go into the plot in detail, because it’s an 8 episode series with long ass episodes. The basic premise is, there’s an alien invasion of Butterflies, who take over people's bodies and give them super strength and such, and are trying to take over Earth, and the team has to destroy their food source. It has the same gory and humorous tone, and there’s a subplot of him coming to terms with his abusive Neo-Nazi dad’s terrible acts, oh oh, there’s a great lesbian character too.

Black Adam (2021)

Budget: $190-260 million

Box Office: $393.3 million

IMDb: 6.3/10

RT: C: 38% A: 88% (wow that is some disparity)

Dwayne Johnson was set to play the character in Shazam!, but he urged to give him his own movie. This movie was supposedly supposed to be “the movie that saved DC”. Honestly, feels like a movie just to have Dwayne Johnson attached to the franchise. It just ended up feeling like a cookie-cutter superhero (ahem, antihero) film.

Plot: Kahndaq was once ruled by a dictator, and a young boy received the powers of Shazam and killed the dictator. Present-day Kahndaq is oppressed by a gang, and Adrianna Tomaz is trying to locate the Crown of Sabbac, she finds it, but her colleagues are killed and she reads the incantation and Teth-Adam arrives and kills them all. Amanda Waller calls the Justice Society, consisting of Atom Smasher, Cyclone, Doctor Fate and Hawkman, to apprehend him.

Sidenote, I am so happy that Hawkman finally got a film adaptation. He is such an interesting character in the comics. They stop his killing spree and tell Adrianna that he is not a savior, but an imprisoned killer. Her son Amon hid the crown but they took him hostage. They give him the crown but he betrays her, and Adam gets mad and kills the leader and wounds Amon. Adam reveals to Hawkman that his son was the one who was given the powers but he gave his powers to him to save him and died. He surrenders because he felt unworthy and is imprisoned deep underwater by the JSA.

Ishmael comes back as Sabbac and tries to destroy the city. The JSA fail to stop him when Adam comes back and saves all of them.

Shazam! Fury Of The Gods (2023)

Plot: After the events of Shazam!, Hespera and Kalypso steal the wizard’s broken staff and force him to fix it. Freddy falls in love with a girl named Anne. Anne is apparently Anthea, and her sisters appear and take Freddy’s powers and he is imprisoned with the Wizard. The Shazam family fight them, but Hespera steals a Golden Apple, a seed for the Tree Of Life. Meanwhile, Anthea helps Freddy and the wizard escape. Hespera and Anthea want to revive their realm with it while Kalypso wants to destroy Earth with it. Kalypso steals the apple and plants it on Earth. Hespera is mortally wounded and Anthea loses her powers, and Shazam gets Hespera’s help to beat Kalypso and in the ensuing fight, Shazam dies and Wonder Woman brings him back to life. Also, for some reason, Wonder Woman appears in this movie and The Flash. I have no idea why. Maybe Gal Gadot had too much time on her hands.

The Flash (2023)

The chronological movie that reboots the DCEU and jumpstarts the DC Universe.

This movie, whoo. Attempts for a Flash movie date back to the 1980s, but let’s not start the story there.

DC had plans for a Flash movie when they created the DCEU, and in 2016, the movie was set to release in 2018.

I became a DC fan in 2018, after reading The Death Of Superman and watching the Zack Snyder movies, and later, a ton of Flash comics, so I have been following the release of this movie well before production began. The movie had been in development hell for a very long time, with so many directors being hired then leaving, until 2019, when Andy Muschietti and Christina Hodson signed on and Ezra Miller, the actor for The Flash finished filming TERF movie, and the movie was scheduled to release July 1st 2022 (I was very sceptical when that news came out, and turns out, I was right to be). The movie was set to adapt the Flashpoint storyline, where Barry goes back in time to prevent his mom’s death, resulting in an alternate timeline where Thomas Wayne is Batman while Bruce Wayne was gunned down, and the Atlanteans and Amazons are in a war that could destroy the Earth, Superman is imprisoned in a government facility, and Barry has no powers, and when Barry corrects the timeline, things have changed, and sets up the New 52, so this can transition into the rebooted DCU slate that James Gunn announced. The movie was again shifted to June 3, 2023, due to the pandemic. Michael Keaton was also hired to reprise his role from the 1989 and 1992 Batman movies, along with Ben Affleck.

Hehe, that’s hilarious

I thought chemistry tests meant like idk CSI stuff and Zoom as in Professor Zoom, Reverse-Flash, or, Zoom, the second Reverse-Flash. I still don’t know what chemistry tests mean, testing the chemistry between actors? I don't know why anyone needed to know that information.

Throughout 2022, a controversy much worse than the development hell it went through hit the movie.

Safe to say, Ezra Miller is a terrible person, but replacing them in the role was pretty much impossible, and the movie couldn’t be cancelled because it was so far ahead in production and had a massive budget. The movie did release, but marketing had to be limited due to this.

Plot: Barry Allen’s dad, Henry Allen is set to appeal for his wrongful imprisonment. He visits his childhood home, and overcome with emotions, he accidentally travels back in time a few hours. He tells Batman about it, and he tells Barry that changing things could have unintended consequences. But he ignores it, and prevents his mother’s death, and on the way back to the present, he is knocked out of the Speed Force by another speedster, arrives in 2013, where his mom is alive and his dad is not imprisoned. He encounters his past self, and realizes that he is currently in the day that Barry got his powers, so he rushes his past self to Central City PD so his past self gets his powers too. But, they both get struck by lightning and 2013-Barry gains powers while Barry loses his. Barry trains 2013-Barry to use his powers when they see a transmission by General Zod on a TV screen, and Barry tries to assemble the Justice League, only to find that Aquaman was never born, Wonder Woman can’t be located, Clark Kent doesn’t seem to exist, and Victor Stone is not Cyborg yet. They then travel to Wayne Manor, where they find an old Bruce Wayne (Michael Keaton) who retired from crime fighting because Gotham is now a safe place (yeah, right), and he explains to Barry that changing events also affect the past. They use the Batcomputer to locate the Kryptonian pod, which is revealed to have landed in Siberia. They go to the Siberian facility but find an emaciated girl instead, who they rescue, and who is revealed to be Kryptonian and she kills the Siberian soldiers. Then she refuses to help them as she thinks humanity is cruel. She then leaves to find Zod. Barry asks Bruce to help him regain his powers, and he tries twice but fails, but Kara returns, saying that Kryptonians are people of hope, not war, and flies Barry into a thundercloud, which succeeds in giving him his powers. They all go to fight Zod, and he reveals that Kara has the Codex, not Kal-El, and fights and kills her to retrieve the Codex, and Bruce sacrifices himself to unsuccessfully destroy a Kryptonian ship. The two Barrys travel back in time to save them but fail, and they try again but fail again, and Barry realizes that they can’t be saved while 2013-Barry keeps trying again and again, failing each time. The speedster who knocked him out of the Speed Force is revealed to be a future 2013-Barry, who kept trying for years and fights Barry, and 2013-Barry sacrifices himself to wipe the future version out of existence, and Barry goes back to prevent himself from preventing his mom’s death, but apparently, he learned absolutely nothing because he placed the can of tomatoes that his dad picked up on the day of his mother’s death on the top shelf, so the camera could capture his dad’s face, acquitting him. He calls Bruce Wayne to let him know of the good news, and he informs him that he is arriving at the courthouse. And he steps out of the car and we see… George Clooney, from the infamous 1997 Batman and Robin.

Okay, so that was a monstrous post :P. Idk why I did this it was probably hella boring. See ya!

#dceu #dceu movies #dc comics #james gunn #james gunn dcu #dcu #batman #superman #the flash #the entire history of #Spotify #Youtube

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