#i really really REALLY can't get over the way that eric influenced him... it was sooooo significant

[hide-your-bugs-away]

my brain: Do you ever think about how Eric shaped and molded Alan into not only the keyboardist he wanted him to be (blues-inspired), but also allowed for Alan to feel more confident in himself and helped give him direction in his playing abilities, through emulating the styles of great blues artists? Eventually branching off on his own; Alan's talent wholly self-taught and unique to him, but given an added gift that presented him with opportunities for gain and for suffering. Prometheus creating humans from clay; gifting them with fire. Security, development, and self-destruction. Earth/Fire signs. You follow?

me: i am going to have a pounding migraine tomorrow morning also YES.

[joaofelix70]

A CRESCENT LOVE, AN EPHEMERAL PASSION | joão félix sequeira.

summary: you and joão spent all the summer together. you even met his friends and brother. could this be the beginning of a crescent love or just an ephemeral passion? his friendship with his ex would ruin everything between the two of you?

author's notes: after the win against luxemburgo, where portugal national team set the record of goals, his ex just posted "mysterious" pics with floki, his dog. joão was also there, almost hidden, actually. we all know she always does it, never assuming anything maturely, but instigating the frustration of the fans who care about him and to make every gossip website and tv show talk about it, just like a teenager who wants attention would act. basically, this inspired me. i really don't hate anyone, by the way. even thought influencers who don't spread any impactful content and nepobabies with no talent and only standard beauty annoys me, i can't lie.

warnings: bad language (of course it's joão saying the words), chaotically humorous almost all the time, but also involving sadness and angst. implicit sex reference, i guess? maybe?

what do you feel when you hear my name? shame? embarrassment?

does your brain even bring you any sign or memory involving me?

do you ever think about me?

are your moments with her comparable to ours?

can we talk? can we communicate?

is it my fault? do you miss me?

your head was drunk for the whirlwinds of questions that piled up and get bigger, like waves. they seemed to be drowning you. the glowing light and peace of your woody brown gaze gives you triggers. his smile remains embedded, in your heart, an eternal home. the numbness and wrapping of his lips, every inch of his tanned skin and firm muscles being appreciated and admired by you. his hair was shiny, soft and full by the salty waters of the european beaches: always caressed for you. his laughs at you giving him the most silly and lazy hairstyles, with you pretending to be a professional who was filming your customer to tiktok.

“do that pose! yes, your hand against your face! now, give me that playboy eye. just like that! you’re doing amazing, sweetie!”

when you get carried away in the game ‘who am i?’ and tried so hard doing the mimes, jumping excitedly and demonstrating your animation in a loud tone, before covering your own mouth and feigning naturalness, just to repeat the same instant acts.

when you made joão watch your random dances as soon as you won at uno and he’d tell how hilarious you were. when you cooked your regional foods and desserts for félix, his brother who’s hugo, alex — the photographer — diogo from the movemind channel and all of his friends. when he used to hold your face, rest his touch on your waist and thighs. tracing his fingerprints across your scalp, reveling in the ethereal smell of your hair, laying his lips against your entire face and stature, exalting you completely: from your ears, neck, collarbone, belly, legs and even your feet. being a gentleman, joão opened the car door for you, he intertwined the hands of you both in every single opportunity and helped you eat: having the cutlery for you to open your mouth and giving you support with the napkin. when you did his goal celebration. when the two of you invented a handshake, along with various inside jokes. for example, when joão posted many videos of him swimming and playing in the ocean.

“hey, flounder! ‘the little mermaid’? i loved it!”

“why am i not your ariel, tho?”

“why you didn’t say you’d prefer to be eric of the real life?”

“give me some respect, i’m the protagonist of this shit!”

“slay, king!”

you remember singing the songs that played in his car in the most chaotic way, using his hand as a microphone and taking the opportunity to kiss all over it and his fancy bracelets. you offered him affection biting his skin and enjoyed acting like his personal masseuse. you called him ‘my prince of portugal’.

“please, don’t become a stranger.” your last words, face to face. the intensity of the summer weeks of vacation, which were already ending, consuming you.

“you know i’d never do that. look, you’re such a unique person, and even though we’re gonna go back to our busy routines, i still wanna keep you in my life. i still wanna be that close to you.” joão declared and they both found comfort in each other’s arms. his perfume granted the beg leave and penetrated your lungs, giving you life. you felt like you shouldn’t let it go, but there was nothing else to accomplish. you were single, so was he. you ask yourself if everything would be different. maybe if you had tried your lips once again: asking him to give a chance to them, to have more. to not leave what you went through, together, in the box of forgotten memories. would that really suffice, though?

"it's obvious that you’d choose the blonde influencer with light eyes, slender body and member of a rich family. the one who was with a formula 1 racer days before she went to meet you. before you just disappear from my life, without saying anything. the one that doesn't show an ounce of authenticity and, of course, affective responsibility. who am i in comparison to her?! right, joão?" your voice flashed the disparity of fragility and indignation, trembling hands clutching the phone.

“y/n, listen to me. you’d never understand it, okay? you’re not inside this relationship, me and her are. you’re seeing it from the outside, just like everyone else. yeah, she was hanging out and making out with other people. so was i with you. but then, some things changed.” john seemed to be busy. echoes of other people's voices ran through the call.

“nothing has happened between us since the vacation, joão. what doesn’t make sense because i thought you were liking me. i only think about you!” you vented out and received silence. his answers tried to become existent and complete. he stammered, the audible sound of his familiar backwards cap being pulled off and his honey-colored hair being rubbed against his own fingerprints.

“do you think i don’t like you? holy shit, y/n. i even thought we could have so much more. a future together and everything. i think about you and i swear in the name of my family, and i already said that they mean the fucking world to me. the thing is: there’s something that still keep me going back to her. i don’t know if it’s because i’m with her since i was younger, but…”

“joão, this is emotional dependence. i’m sorry to tell you this, however, it’s necessary. i care about you. you’re so internally and externally beautiful, precious, successful and talented. you deserve better!” you interrupted him, stepping back and forth.

“y/n, i love her. when i looked at you…”

“she’s all that you see, right?”

“hm… yeah…” félix found himself in a bind. paralyzed, he remained without an answer for a while. the coldness of the material of his gold necklace touches his tongue: a way to combat the nervousness that generates the gnawed nails.

“my toxic behavior wants to help and fix you so badly, but i know i can’t get more involved than that. i’m not the one for you.” the words reproduced by yourself reinforced the fragmentation of your heart.

“j, baby… are you coming or not? i’m waiting for you, floki is waiting for his dad!” you heard that female voice call to him and realized the way that just this factor made his breathing destabilize.

“i think this is officially the end of whatever we had, joão. goodbye!” your voice was unstable and he realized it: sharp as deep, transparent and suffocating waters.

“i wish you the best, y/n. i apologize for not being what you expected, what you needed, and…”

“caralho, joão! que merda! (holy fuck, joão! what the hell?). come on, give me your phone!” the girl began to rant. her heels against the floor were exclamatory. she was running out of patience.

the call is over. again, you were superimposed on the ocean of blazing tears. you tried to convince yourself that everything went the way it was supposed to be.

but was it for real?

[thestupidhelmet]

Do you think Jay's womanizing could be explained by his father's and uncles' constant bragging about his conquests when he was growing up? It would make sense for him to turn out like you described, but the way he turned out in the actual show could also make a lot of sense if you imagine his father and uncles sharing TMI about their own sex lives or saying things like: "don't settle down, sleep with as many girls as you can, that's the life" or "you are twelve and you still haven't kissed a girl? You need to get right on it, you're behind!" This kind of upbringing would produce a womanizer but the show could have delved more into that and had Jay tell more stories about his home life than just "my mom is mad that I set the carpet on fire"

I think it's a plausible possibility -- without Jackie being his mother or in his life. But Jackie would've made Jay the center of her life, especially with Kelso stepping out in her regularly (a reasonable extrapolation based on his T7S characterization and their relationship in both T7S and T9S).

Jackie would not want Jay emulating his father, despite that -- or because -- she can't disentangle her romantic feelings from Kelso. While she's her T7S S1-S4 controlling and somewhat violent self to T9S Kelso, she could very well treat Jay in a much more loving way. We know she's capable of it with the right influences and motivation.

With a mom who respects, loves, and supports him, Jay would (hopefully) not develop the misogyny Kelso and his male siblings have due, in large part, to their mother's inability to parent so many children and give the attention each needs. As Eric tells Kelso in "Stolen Car" (T7S S1), Kelso's parents have seven kids and won't notice Kelso is missing or have the wherewithal to care that one was arrested.

Of course, Kelso's father is equally responsible. But from what we see of him in "Career Day" (T7S 1x18), he's not turned into his emotions. He's a worker, possibly a workaholic. He's not the dad to play a baseball game with his kids or take them to a baseball game.

But for Kelso and Casey, at least, their anger and resentment at their upbringing is transferred onto all women since their mother is likely the parent who was physically present and doing most of the parenting -- and probably at her wits' end with seven of them to raise.

Jackie has one child in T9S. Despite that she's a Jackie whose relationship with Hyde is cut from her core, her core still contains her potential to love unconditionally, her emotional insight, her reflex to be helpful and supportive, her potential to be self-aware. Jay would've gotten the best of Jackie while growing up with the discipline and boundaries Kelso is incapable of giving him.

For example, he wouldn't have stolen Nate's bike because Jackie would've made sure Jay had the best of everything, partly to (over)compensate for the father he has and her toxic relationship with him.

Kelso's sex talk(s) would consist of "doing it as much and as often as you can. That'll prove you're the hottest guy around, and everyone'll look up to you. Also, most chicks'll expect you to be monogamous. Just tell them you are and have sex with whoever you want. It worked for me. Your mom still married me --twice -- despite all the cheating I do -- I mean did. Yeah. 'Cause she'd rather be with the hottest cheater than the loserist monogamist."

(^^^ This is before the third divorce and third remarriage).

Jackie's sex talks would also be romantic relationship talks. First, she'd tell him to ignore everything his dad said. Then she'd say, "Find out who the girl you like really is. It's easy to ignore red flags if you want an idea of a girl badly enough. Don't mistake what's fantasy for what's real.

"If you don't want to be 'tied down' to one girl, that's okay. Just be honest with the girls you date. Let them know you aren't interested in being anyone's full-time boyfriend. Then they have the choice to hook up with you or not. You wouldn't want a girl you really, really like to lie to you about that, right? And being silent about the truth is the same as lying."

Jay might ask her why she stays "with Dad" or keeps going back to him.

Jackie says, "You are a wonderful, smart, creative boy. You can be whoever you want. Have what you truly want. Don't settle for less than what you're worth."

Jay says, "Wait ... are you telling me you settled for Dad? Why?"

Jackie says, "I'm telling you that you don't have to settle."

Jackie refuses to elaborate, but Jay wants to know why his great mom would settle for his not-so-great dad. This would be a driving force because it's an inextricable part of his own identity (as forged by his upbringing).

[chaos0pikachu]

Cinema Sins and early 00's pop feminism really fucked up people's media literacy

HCA wrote the original short story about a dude he had unrequited feelings for and also religion; in the original story mermaids don't have immortal souls therefore can't get into heaven. The mermaid goes up to shore, falls in love with the prince and decides she wants him & an immortal soul. Sea witch stuff happens - her tongue gets cut out in some translations woo! - she gets her legs, loses her voice, but every time she walks or dances she's in great pain.

It's all a metaphor that her love for the prince causes her great pain; the prince adores her but as like, a bro. He calls her his "little foundling", and she's his constant companion but like, in a bro way. He also kisses her and cuddles her but again, in like, this doesn't count as anything man, summer experimentation am I right we're just bros. Like wow I like you sooooo much, you're everything I could ever want in a spouse if you only, like, were this woman I've idealized. Eventually the Prince meets a Princess who he believes is the woman who saved him from the shipwreck and is like omg you! you're the one! and they marry like that night.

Her sisters show up and are like "here's a dagger from the sea witch kill that bitch ass dude and you can rejoin us & live for 300 years!" the mermaid obviously doesn't kill him, tosses the knife, and jumps into the ocean turning into sea foam. Except when she does literal angels come down and are like "hey girl you've had a rough go so God said we'll do you a solid since you didn't kill that man. Work for God for 300 years and you'll go to heaven!" so that's what the mermaid does, happily ever after~

HCA basically said, "I may not get my man but at least I have God."

The Disney version follows the story pretty closely but takes out the, uh, religious bits lol and actually gives the mermaid her happy ending. Howard Ashman was a gay man, who also, tragically, died of AIDs before the production of Beauty and the Beast (which he also worked on) was finished. In the ending credits you can see a dedication to him from the crew "To Howard, who gave the mermaid her voice and the beast his soul".

You can also see Howard, who wrote the lyrics for Little Mermaid and Beauty and the Beast, influence thorough-out both stories. The songs for Little Mermaid were written before the script, during the story treatment. Howard wrote Part of Your World, Ariel's "I Want" song before anything about the love story was even finalized. He talked specifically to the crew how Ariel had to have a strong motivation, what does she want? To become human, and she had to get that by the end of the movie was what he told the crew. The film wouldn't work without her being motivated to the goal. It was never about Eric, Howard wanted Ariel to want to become human for her own reasons. He changed the story from a metaphorical story about unrequited (same-sex) love, that only God could heal after great sacrifice, to one where the heroine was motivated all her own to exist, happily, healthy, and openly in her own body and accepted by those around her.

Ariel doesn't go through a self-actualization arc, but Triton does. Metaphorically, Triton reads almost more like a homophobic parent who has to accept his queer child.

Triton hates humans, but more so, Triton rejects Ariel's wants, desires, and refuses to accept who she is. Part of Your World reflects Ariel's frustration and sadness lyrically over her father's rejection of her true self. You'll notice, Triton is NOT upset in the film that Ariel might be in love, in fact, he's over the moon about it! He only gets upset that Ariel is in love with a human ie the wrong type of person. He lashes out violently, Ariel runs away from home, he realizes his mistake and regrets his actions. At the end of the movie he realizes that Ariel's happiness, her living as her true self with the person she loves, is more important than his own prejudices. He has to love his child for who they are so they can be happy.

So yeah, the mermaid gets her happy ending (and she didn't even need God this time!) and the last line of the film isn't some ode to Eric it's Ariel to Triton, "I love you daddy". Because the core relationship in the film isn't Ariel and Eric, it's Ariel and Triton. It's about a young person wanting desperately to live as their authentic self in a society that rejects them, their own parent rejecting them, and how that parent comes to accept them in the end.

I find it an interesting coincidence of the universe, that the original story was written by a man about his unrequited feelings towards another man, later adapted by a gay man who had a longtime partner (who accepted the Oscar on Howard's behalf for BATB) but still had to hide b/c of the stigma around AIDs towards the community. How both versions of the same story showcases two very different experiences of queer identity reflective of the time periods in which they were made.

And yet, the most common bit of commentary regarding the film is "she gave up her voice for a man!"

“Ariel sold her voice for legs just because of a guy“

Meanwhile Ariel with legs;

Ariel already loved the human world long before meeting Eric (you don’t get a collection like hers overnight) and when she finally got a chance to explore it, she took it.

Ursula made it more about Eric than Ariel ever did.

[sann3e-blog]

Makari, Deserves as much Fandom as Atari

There's a sea of amazing guitarists, drummers, bassists, vocalists etc. Makari sticks out in the wave’s of hardworking, talented musicians that we all play throughout our day's via Pandora, Spotify or YouTube, to create that extra dopamine we need in today's tricky times. Eric, Matt, Kevin, John and Andy wrote some incredibly moving few songs as of recent for their upcoming album. I want to dig more into how much I encourage Makari's new album, Wave Machine, to be at the top of your 2024 playlists.

I highlight Makari because of their pure talent. I'll start with that. Listening and analyzing music over the past decade for one of my careers, I have been craving the subtle/not so subtle intricacies musicians create. The wind fortuitously blew me the name of a band I hadn't heard of yet and this band, Makari, was like an intravenous B12 shot that gave me the nostalgia of those sparking intricacies I could remember feeling when I first started to really study music.

Makari's tsunami of notes throughout their albums and drum sequencing illuminate my soul, truly. Faith I had in music was restored with my first listen to their album, "Hyperreal."

From Better to Fractals, straight through ending the 'Hyperreal' album with songs, Dashboard and Control, I was in awe. I was in awe at the connection the band members in Makari are able to communicate with their fans through guitar riffs, drum beats that'll steal your soul and vocals that range to the farthest black hole in space and back. That, is the definition of a band worth listening to.

What I find intriguing about all these apps we use daily, is the positive side of how we're all able to connect on a global level. How what we enjoy can be enhanced by suggested artists based on who's station you chose that day. Listening to Makari on Pandora, I have come across other artists that inspire the heck out of me. Strawberry Girls, Body Thief, Tillian and Hail the Sun are just to name a few.

Instagram can feel supportive in finding individual's with mutual interests. I remember this one person, vocalist, music producer Mitchel Madak, and I commented on one of Makari's post's. By him resonating with whatever I said on the photo, curiosity called and I checked Mitchel's ig because it seemed like he may be making some music too.

Listening to Mitchel Madak, reminded me of weekends with Owl City dream pop vibes on the way to the beach. With more punch and soul in the vocals, though. I might rename him as an archangel, you’ve brought me peace and ease when listening, Mitchel, thank you. Mixing in some rap to beat, you got your bases covered for a mood booster with Madak in your earbuds. Check him out on all music platforms. Links for Apple Music & Spotify here.

I asked Mitchel how Makari has influenced his own work. This is what he had to say, "Being a vocalist and even a music producer is all about getting out of one's own way and letting raw emotion come through. When listening to Hyperreal or really any Makari project, I can feel this sense of an unleashed outpouring of emotion. Especially for me as a vocalist, I admire Andy's voice and how there is really nothing he can't sing. His belting is just this blast of energy. I always feel inspired and even challenged by Makari to push myself to another level."

'Hyperreal, 'Elegies,' 'Continuum,' including the acoustic album 'Alternate EP,' are some of their discography worth many listens. These mentioned albums are medicine that help me stay sober. I found throughout my struggle with drinking (in particular, last year) that when I felt a craving, I could get in my car or sit in my room...and air guitar, then air drumming along, while sing out the notes...relating to every lyric, my craving would pass. These albums have been on my music listening platforms playing in circles. I have a lot to credit for being successfully sober...but Makari healed more than I knew I needed. Acceptance for me was found in how important it is to remain on the path of light and Makari helped me stay there.

Interestingly enough, someone I knew in high school (mind you, that's over 15 years ago for me) and I still see each other's thing's on ig. I knew her on an aquaintice basis more than me being able to say that I knew Payton well. I do know that she exudes from the inside out that she's a beautiful person. Strong, funny and caring. She now lives in Colorado with her husband. I posted "Breakers," one of Makari's tracks off their new album, so pumped to share. Payton said she really appreciated the post. Little did I know at the time how much the song helped her through. An ICU trip to the hospital with her husband, who as I do, struggles with alcoholism.

When I asked Payton generally, what her first impression was of Makari, what she had to say hit so close to home. "this song came into my life during another one of my husband's alcoholic relapses (he was in the ICU) the song just really got me through my day." I don't think she knew my struggle with alcohol, but I'm sure she saw it over the years. This article was not supposed to end up mentioning anything about being sober. When I asked Payton about Makari, she didn't know I had written of my own experience with addiction to alcohol. I generally asked, "what was the first thing Makari reminded you of when you listened to the "Breakers" song?" I didn't expect her to have experienced the same relief I felt listening through their albums, Makari's music was a perfect prescription for making productivity out of pain. I'm not a Doctor but if I was, I'd prescribe daily listen's to all things Makari.

“We’ve worked so hard on this album over the past 2 years,” Makari says. “We’re lucky to have amazing fans supporting our art, thank you.”

These interactions drive me to want to let as many people as I can know about this band. They know we’re here as fans to support them. Do all you can to support their music. Buy albums, go to shows and sing along. Raise the bar in your subscribe button pushing and “likes” because these actions can give back to the band members of Makari who gave Wave Machine their all.

2024, Wave Machine is about to drop in March and I couldn’t be more excited to listen. Everyone meditates in a different way. I meditate while I dive into music. Makari’s music center’s me. I’d like to walk into a meditation practice with a song like, "Soul Stealer" from Makari's new album. “Soul Stealer’s” intro will give you chills. And set you free.

On March 8, 2024, Makari’s album, Wave Machine will be released. The album will be my favorite new outlet. Makari continues to be my way to expel that excess of happy realizations in life. I love dancing in the car with them on my car stereo. Life hit's softer with Makari playing in my 2012 Honda Civic. Feel the energy yourselves when the album comes out in MARCH 2024!

[the-firebird69]

Eric Clapton - Steve Winwood (Can't find my way home)

He's asking us not to war with a bigger enemies to worry about and you're using up zerg we have to ask you to stop and you don't seem to want to what he says is there a Zurich in their demons and then I'm working with the demons in their butts cuz you get rid of all the bugs that's horrible and much worse

Stan

It's very true and we're going to allow him to say and you guys are horrible you're horrible you've seen what happens you know it ruins both to you you're going to lose the bunkers we're going to take them over I mean what's wrong with you you stupid and the answers they're very dumb

Zig Zag

No Chris the answer is not moot the answer is what is above and yeah it started making motorcycles I'm so tired of all these motorcycles that don't work right they have stupid things on them make dumb noises and are weak or lame or not strong enough or all sorts of dumb things or nobody can fit on them cuz they're too big they're monstrous for a lot of people there aren't that many large people in this ridiculous and there's no scooter that does anything that's worth anything as hell and Honda even fell down and made him so high that regular riders couldn't ride them they said they're too hard to ride cuz the center of gravity is so high and like 38 in and you can lower them down to 32 and then you have no shocks for the most part and they didn't ride well it's a nightmare these people on other nightmare and we're finding out there almost all under the influence so he says why don't they shut the hell up and if there's a group of them with no motorcycle car get together and buy one of our scooters to start to go get stuff and things like that and possibly do small jobs for their clan to get ready and they'll all be able to have money that's a good idea so I'm going to try and do that and we're going to try and get them to do franchises

Hera

We like this idea there's no real way for you to co-own the motorcycle without making an agreement with your friends and he says you can do it in writing but yeah that's an agreement so we're going to go ahead with this and try and get franchises once we see the bike we're going to ask for it and we're ready and it's intense we're really going to be chopping at the bit

Bja

However I probably had enough of his songs and stuff and writings but I do see this and we're doing something horrible right now and I get it and we have to do the research it's an emergency to get the information

Trump and if they're taking Billy zone chips we need to know

[mangosimoothie]

The Bachelorette: Episode 17 - The Same Language

On her final hometown date, Aja goes with Ryan to his beautiful island hometown in Hawaii where they spend an exciting day with an important family member. Meanwhile, the boys back at the Bachelorette Mansion are getting up to some trouble of their own. Only one day away from the elimination that will bring us to our top three, the stakes are higher than ever.  [soundtrack]

"Dude, get the fuck off me." "No way. Bring it in, bro."

Ryan: Eric, this is Aja. Aja, this court jester is my twin, Eric. Aja: I didn't know you have a TWIN! That's so cool!!! Ryan: It's alright. Eric: Ryan's just being modest. Having me as a twin RULES and he loves me very much.

After introductions were over everyone heads to a secluded beach that, per Ryan and Eric's request, we won't be revealing the location of. Eric: The haoles haven't found this one yet, so it's still a really cool spot.

Eric: Aja, welcome to Kama'āina Wale Nō! Ryan: Which translates to Locals Only. But obviously I’d make an exception for you.  Aja: Wow, what an honor!

[soundtrack] Ryan and Eric complain that the waves today were pretty weak, but Ryan’s still able to show off his skills, and it gives Aja a good opportunity to get a mini lesson.

To Aja's surprise, it doesn’t take too much convincing from Ryan's brother to get him to do some cliff jumping. They explain that they'd been coming here since they were kids, and since then there'd only been ONE broken ankle, so it's pretty safe.

Ryan and Eric share stories of their antics growing up. Aja: So, I'm guessing Ryan you were “good” one? Very well behaved and all that? Eric: Are you kidding?? Ryan is Dark Mode. I'M the good one. I had to cut my hair so I'd stop getting in trouble for his school pranks. Ryan: Wow, ok. In my defense, you happily took credit for some of my BEST work. And I wear the long hair better than you do.

After the beach, they hit a local bar for some drinks. Aja notices that Ryan and Eric can't help but crack each other up wherever they go. She doesn’t feel like a third wheel though, especially since it’s so entertaining. Ryan warns Aja not to get any drinks with pineapple in them. Ryan: Rookie mistake here. It tastes like a juice box, so you'll get WAY too fucked up. I think they do it just to fuck with tourists. Aja: Aw but they have little umbrellas...ok, fine.

Eric: Not gonna lie, I definitely gave Ryan a lot of shit for going on a reality show, but he seems...really happy. It's kinda weird. Aja: Honestly, he hasn't really been this animated! Maybe he was a little homesick? I think he's excited to see you. Eric: Awww, you think he missed me?? I'm gonna take your word for it, cuz he'd never say that out loud. Also I'm gonna get two more of those pineapple things, you want? Aja: Didn't Ryan say nobody gets those?" Eric: Ryan's no fun since he left the island! The Kato family alcohol tolerance is top tier, I'll be good.

After a few too many drinks on Eric's part, Ryan decides it was time to wind down at home. "He calls me Dark Mode but he's always the one that blacks out..."

Aja: Is he gonna be ok? Ryan: He's slept off worse under my influence. He'll be good. Aja: Sorry if it's a sore subject, but do your parents not live here on the island? I was hoping I'd get to meet them! Ryan: They split up a while ago. Dad moved back to Japan, mom’s off gallivanting somewhere and hard to keep track of. To tell the truth I haven't spoken to them in a few years now. We're kind of...estranged, I guess. It's complicated. Aja: I get it. You know, me and my mom are the same way. She left when I was little. I'm not even sure what city she lives in. But she always sends me a birthday gift though, which is nice I guess... Ryan: Ahhh the classic “I'm gonna send you a gift instead of an apology!” I used to get those! Aja: Works like a charm, right? Ryan: I don’t let it eat me up too much. I’ve got Eric, and he’s been my rock since literally day one. We speak the same language, you know? He’s always been able to snap me out of it when I’m kind of spiraling. I think you just need that person that gets you. Um, so thanks for getting me to vent a little. Even though I guess it’s not like, the romantic vibe we’re supposed to be going for. [soundtrack] 

Aja: You know what? It kinda is. I like getting to know you know you. I'm really glad you're opening up to me, Ryan. I can't believe I almost sent you home. Ryan: You did?? Aja: I guess I shouldn't have said that, but yeah. You're hard to read! It's confusing! But now that you're letting me in I can tell how sweet you actually are. Atticus kinda saved your ass sending himself home. Ryan: Yeah, I guess he did...but there is something I really have to tell you. Aja: What is it? Ryan: ...Uh...well...actually, nevermind. Aja: Oh come on. Ryan: I...think I'm about to crash. That’s what I wanted to say. Been a long night. But, Aja, I'm really glad I'm still here.

"Feels a little cryptic but ok. I'm glad you're here too."

"Who knew prickly Ryan was actually such a softie? It's really cute. I'm glad he's got Eric to bring this fun, open side of him out a little. Hopefully I get to see more of that. Also, tell him to wear his hair down more. It’s super hot."

Meanwhile back at the Bachelorette mansion, Cooper's heading downstairs for a midnight snack when he spots Bastien having what seems like a lighthearted conversation (we can only assume, since we don't have anyone to translate French) on the phone

After a little bit of hesitation, Cooper decides to confront Bastien! Whatever he says in French, it’s super heated! Bastien: I do not understand Canadian. What are you talking about? Cooper: I'm literally speaking French; you KNOW what I'm saying! And I know what YOU were saying! How could you do that?! There's no way you're gonna get away with this; I'm telling Aja. Bastien: Perhaps there is a language barrier issue, because I truthfully still do not understand. Cooper: It's the same language!!

Bastien: Ahh...I see what you're doing. Well played. I'm surprised; I didn't think you'd be the tricky one. I assumed Ryan would be the snake, but he's actually quite likable. Cooper: What are you talking about? Bastien: You're trying to make me the villain. It's smart. You are the only other person that (technically) speaks French so if you pretend you heard me saying something that would send me home, you think everyone would take your word over mine. Sweet, non-threatening, fan favorite, underdog Cooper versus arrogant, wildcard, too good to be true, superstar Bastien. So you interrupt me talking with my agent about my upcoming tour and decide to make up something else to say that I said to make me look bad and get Aja to send me away. Cooper: What? No! That's what YOU’RE doing! You're making that up.

Cooper: Why are you laughing?? Stop it! Bastien: Because this is a dumb plan! You realize if you go to Aja with more lies you're sending yourself home, no? Aja does not trust you. She knows me. Cooper: I don't care if I lose, as long as you don't win. Bastien: I always win. You'd really risk being eliminated from such a foolish move? Cooper: It's the right thing to do.

"Very noble. I can see you're very committed to this act. Bonne nuit, Coopet! I guess we’ll meet again at the reunion episode."

"I need to talk to Aja the SECOND she gets off that plane." What the hell is going on? Who of the four will be sent home in the elimination?? Will Cooper's revelation (or trick??) influence the decision?? And what was up with Ryan's whole "I need to tell you something - actually nevermind" thing??? And are French and Canadian French the same language???? Guess we'll have to wait until the next episode to find out!

NEXT | PREVIOUS | BEGINNING 

[runthepockets]

So you got Spike Lee, who directed the former film, who clearly felt very seen by the more Concious Hip Hop of the early - mid 80s. Like Do the Right Thing is littered with endearing intracommunity touchstones ala Buggin Out freaking it when a white guy steps on his luxury shoes, teenaged black boys teasing and flirting with their black girl peers while shirtless and busting fire hydrants, a little trio of oldheads sitting around making raunchy inside jokes, a snarky old black lady with an ongoing "will they won't they" relationship with an old guy, and a protagonist who's a little flakey and lippy, but at the end of the day always tries to Do The Right Thing.

It's clear from the general political stance of the movie, and its general world, that Spike Lee was really endeared by the lyricism and worldviews of rappers like Public Enemy, Run DMC, Eric B & Rakim, ICE-T, De La Soul, and, of course, Tribe Called Quest (I think the latter group played the biggest role in his creative process, considering the movie itself is set in New York and Tribe have been a huge shift in the world of Hip Hop since they stepped onto the scene. Plus....idk, just fuckin put the movie on mute and listen to Low End Theory over that jawn. The vibe just fits!), as well as the couple of years he spent in New York himself trying to earn his MFA.

Comparitively, you have Boyz in the Hood, which is just as inspired by the former film as it is by its Hip Hop mid 80s - early 90s contemporaries, and John Singleton's real life experiences with coming of age in L.A. You have characters like Tre, the competent but skeptical protagonist who is very clearly swayed by the world around him, despite what his brilliant and well meaning father has been offering him since he was a grade schooler. Ricky, the sporty, laid back, ambitious, good hearted homeboy that every black guy has had at some point in his life (that ends up meeting a terrible fate by the end of the film, uncoincidentally), and Doughboy, the living breathing "cautionary tale" that you can't help but feel sorry for cus, fuck, man, for all his flaws, he's a product of his environment. Did he really have that much of a choice in the matter?

John Singleton's stories are much more intimate and world weary than Spike Lee's, but still have that signature "80s - early 90s movie style" that you can't really deny, which is why it's also apparent that he's more influenced by the works of Snoop Dogg, Biggie, Gangstarr, LL Cool J, Slick Rick, NWA, Tupac, and, of course, Tribe Called Quest (for all his West Coast centric biases and "I'm very obviously a little dude in the body of an adult man" flaws, he has a lot of cultural analysis, humor, and experiences that can really only appeal and speak to the black people watching, so he undeniably had his community's best interests at heart, which is why I respect him as much as I do.)

And you can see this in a lot more black made and black casted movies in the present day, ykno. The guy who made Dope (a movie about a geeky black boy who gets into some geeky black boy Bullshit, another one of my favorite hood movies) was very clearly inspired by shit like Run the Jewels, Kendrick, Childish Gambino, Chief Keef, Vince Staples, and of course A$AP Rocky (who guest stars in the film) and most likely Kanye's My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy. I mean, it's very much a movie about a geeky black boy who doesn't fully understand his way in the world, yet, so I can only assume it was a product of its time (in a very good way; I was a geeky black boy in the 2010s myself and I definitely felt seen by all of the main trio in the film).

Spike Lee and John Singleton, they started the shit and they're kinda still carrying it, maybe not conciously but to a certain degree, ykno? That's fucking awesome.

Do the Right Thing and Boyz n the Hood are two of my favorite movies of all time and every time I watch either of em I just think about how interesting it is to watch these two black men with very different relationships with Hip Hop portray that relationship on the big screen.

[96thdayofrage]

Convicting a murderous cop has its consequences. The integrity of a juror in the trial of former Minneapolis police officer Derek Chauvin is being called into question because the juror attended a march for Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. last August, CBS-affiliated WCCO reported on Tuesday. Floyd’s family spoke at the March on Washington, which was intended to commemorate the 57th anniversary of the civil rights leader's famous "I Have a Dream" speech. It also included a voter registration rally, which Brandon Mitchell, the juror in question, told WCCO was the reason he attended. His attire at the event, however, is now being scrutinized after he was photographed in a T-shirt with King's image and the words, “Get Your Knee Off Our Necks,” and “BLM,” which Mitchell explained were broader references to the circumstances of 2020.

“It was huge to get people geared for voter turnout, so being a part of that, being able to attend, you know, the same location where Martin Luther King gave his speech was a historic moment,” Mitchell told WCCO. “Either way, I was going to D.C. for this event, even if George Floyd was still alive.” Floyd is not alive, and don’t for one second let Chauvin’s apparent desperation to get away with murder obscure the fact that Floyd is not here to see his daughter grow up because of Chauvin. Not Mitchell or any other member of the jury.

Chauvin, who is due for sentencing at 2:30 PM ET on June 16, was convicted of second-degree murder, third-degree murder, and second-degree manslaughter last month. Several clips of witness video presented at trial showed him kneeling on the neck of 46-year-old Floyd for more than nine minutes on May 25, 2020, outside of the Cup Foods corner store in Minneapolis. That video went viral and ushered the case onto an international stage, fueling anti-racism and anti-police brutality protests.

Still, Mitchell, juror No. 52 in the trial, told CBS This Morning co-host Gayle King he didn't feel pressure to reach a guilty verdict "at all … And I don't think any of us felt like that. I for sure did not. I for sure did not feel like that,” Mitchell said. “The pressure more so came from just being in the room and being under stress. But it wasn't pressure to come to A guilty verdict." He told King he was stressed about having to come into the courtroom and watch a Black man die every day. “That alone is stressful,” he said. “Coming in each and every day and having to watch somebody die is stressful enough by itself. So anything outside of that was secondary, just because as a human, it's natural to feel some kind of way as you're watching somebody in agony.”

Chauvin's defense attorney, Eric Nelson, brought up the question of just how much outside opinions of the case might be affecting the trial when he didn’t like how Rep. Maxine Waters answered an interviewer's question about what demonstrators should do if Chauvin isn't convicted. “We’ve got to get more confrontational," she said. "We’ve got to make sure that they know that we mean business.” With that, Nelson brought up the possibility of a mistrial and said the jury should have been sequestered from the start of the trial. “My phone gives me alerts on things that just happened. I mean you can’t avoid it, and it is so pervasive that I just don’t know how this jury can really be said to be that they are free from the taint of this,” Nelson said. “And now that we have U.S. representatives threatening acts of violence in relation to this specific case, it’s mind-boggling to me judge.” Judge Peter Cahill admonished Waters but ultimately ruled that her remarks weren’t grounds for a mistrial.

Civil rights attorney Ben Crump, who represents the Floyd family, told TMZ that Mitchell's interview "completely obliterates" any claim from the Chauvin defense that public opinions outside the courtroom influenced the jury.

Rachel Moran, a law professor from the University of St. Thomas, told WCCO an important consideration in the case is whether lawyers did their job in investigating jurors. Mitchell said in a questionnaire WCCO obtained that he never took part in a protest about police brutality and that the phrase Black lives matter simply means Black people "want to be treated as equals and not killed or treated in an aggressive manner simply because they are Black.”

“If he had been asked about it and he tried to hide it, that could be an issue,” Moran said. “But at this point, I don’t see anything, any evidence that he tried to hide it.”

The attorney added that “it’s really important for the viewers at home to know it’s really hard to overturn a conviction, and courts are especially reluctant to interfere with the jury deliberation process.”

Read the transcript of King’s interview with Mitchell from CBS News:

King: 31-year-old Brandon Mitchell was known only as juror #52, and he joins us now. Brandon, we're really glad to see you because all of us wanted to know what happened. So I'd like you if you could, please take us inside the room. I think we were surprised that you're 12 strangers, you didn't know each other, you go in the room — what's the process, and how were you able to reach a verdict so quickly? And good morning!

Juror Brandon Mitchell: Yeah. Absolutely. Good morning to you. First, I want to send my condolences to the Floyd family.

King: Yes.

Mitchell: But when we walked into the deliberation room, the first thing we did is we voted on whether or not we wanted to have our mask on. We made that kind of an ice breaker to get going. We voted to not have our mask on. We took our masks off. We voted for a foreperson, and from there we went straight into the manslaughter charges and took a preliminary vote before doing a final vote on those charges.

King: What was the preliminary vote?

Mitchell: The preliminary vote was 11 of us were already — we were already on board for guilty for the manslaughter. One person was still unsure. And we just went over it as a team, as a group. Each person kind of went down the line on why they thought it was guilty. We did another vote maybe 40 minutes later after we went through everybody, and everybody was on the same page for the manslaughter. It happened really quickly.

King: Did you do that with each of the charges? Is that what you did, took a vote on each of the charges?

Mitchell: Yeah, absolutely. Each charge we did a preliminary vote to see where we were at, if there was anybody that was not on board yet or was unsure. Then we would go around the room, everybody kind of speak on what they think is necessary to speak on. We went over maybe a little bit of the evidence. And then we'd come back with a final vote whenever we thought it was a suitable time.

King: What was the one person unsure about, Brandon?

Mitchell: I think it was just like, the terminology. So within the instructions, some of the terminology can be a little tricky, because it's legal jargon. And so sometimes some of the words can be interpreted differently among people. It was just they wanted to do their due diligence and make sure that they were coming out with the right verdict that they believed in. So they were hung up on a few words. We went through the definitions that were given to us and kind of broke it down from different perspectives to get everybody on the same page.

King: Was there any particular witness that moved you and moved the jury that you said, okay, we're deeply affected by 'fill in the blank'?

Mitchell: So I think as a whole jury, I think Dr. Tobin was the biggest, the most influential witness out of everybody. For me personally, Donald Williams was another person. So Donald Williams and Dr. Tobin --

King: That's the fighter, yeah. The mixed martial arts fighter.

Mitchell: Yeah, so him early on, I felt he set the tone for the rest of the trial. And then when Dr. Tobin came, with him speaking so scientifically but also making it understandable for everyone along with the exhibits that he came with, I thought he just broke it down in a manner that was easy for all the jurors to understand. And I didn't think there was any way to — for the defense to come back after that. I was like, to me, the case was — it was done at that point almost.

King: Did you feel pressure because you knew the world was watching? That, you know, we have to reach a guilty verdict here?

Mitchell: Not at all. And I don't think any of us felt like that. I for sure did not. I for sure did not feel like that. The pressure more so came from just being in the room and being under stress. But it wasn't pressure to come to A guilty verdict.

King: What were you all stressed about?

Mitchell: We were just stressed about just the simple fact that every day we had to come in and watch a Black man die. That alone is stressful. Coming in each and every day and having to watch somebody die is stressful enough by itself. So anything outside of that was secondary, just because as a human, it's natural to feel some kind of way as you're watching somebody in agony.

King: Yeah. I can't imagine, Brandon, what it was like to be able to watch that tape day after day after day, the way you all did.

Mitchell: Yeah. It definitely had its impact on me. There was a few days where I was like, I don't know how I'm going to make it in this next day, especially me as a Black man. And a larger black man, I'm about 6'4", 250 pounds. And some of the testimony is like saying how size can be considered like, you know, is it a risk or threat. Whereas me, I'm a gentle giant. Stuff like that, that affects me in a way that — it's weird. I don't know if it affects anybody else the same way.

King: I understand. I understand what you're saying. How did you all feel about Derek Chauvin, the fact that he did not take the stand? Would that have made a difference to you? We'll never know, but do you think it would have made a difference?

Mitchell: It possibly — it possibly could have. We did talk about, you know, the fact that he didn't. Somebody had brought it up, like they wished he would have, they would have liked to have heard from him. But since it wasn't part of the case, it just is what it is. But yeah, I mean, anything brought in or not brought in, it could have possibly affected it either way. Either way I can't say it would have changed the outcome, but it's a possibility for sure.

King: Do you worry about your safety now? This was such a controversial case. We now know your name, we now know what you look like, we now know that you said you're a large man. Do you worry about your safety?

Mitchell: No, not at all. Not at all. I'm a person that kind of thrives in the positives. So I'm not too much concerned about that. Nor do I dwell on —

King: —the what if's—

Mitchell: —on negativity like that. Yeah, the what if's.

King: And he's going to be sentenced June 25. What do you think is the proper sentence for him, for Derek Chauvin? He's facing up to 40 years.

Mitchell: Yeah. I couldn't say what the proper sentencing would be. You know, I think we came up with the right verdict. You know, guilty on all charges. And you know, I'll let the judge do what he does.

King: All right, thank you very much. We really wanted to hear from you today. It's been a fascinating case that we've been watching.

Mitchell: Yes, thank you.

[outrunningthedark]

What's your favourite thing about dele and eric being together? Mine is that despite everything, dele is so fiercely proud of eric no matter what and that sometimes whether it's conscious or not it just pours out of him. I'm trying to get some positivity going because Tumblrs been a sad place for a while now with all the hate and fighting. I don't have an issue with people saying their opinions but some dele and eric positivity can't hurt!

Oh, nonnie. This is probably a topic better suited for off-blog because I could talk endlessly about all the things our boys do that make me want to s c r e a m 🤭  Dele - Ever since the power couple pulled back from social media and public interactions, my kiddo was the one fans assumed became ‘uncomfortable’ with the attention/gossip. In reality, he handed over his twitter and insta accounts to his brother. Our Del got his insta “back” at the start of lockdown and...what did he do? Reminded everyone just how close he and Eric are. Still. That Dele/Dier dinner never happened. If anyone thinks Dele was the person to step in the way of that...stop. Right now. He did not mention it more than once just to act like it was never a ~thing~. But I digress! The point I’m getting at is... yes, I can acknowledge that Dele is the “quieter” of the two, usually, but when he knows Eric needs his support, when he gets in these “rebellious” moods...boy, does he really not give a fuck. It’s beautiful.  Some examples: His very obvious concern over Eric’s injury last March, going right up to him for a head scratch just so Eric knew he was there; letting Eric hump him ON THE PITCH after Ajax (people will twist themselves into pretzels trying to make that moment “not gay”); the insta live after the match when he acknowledged Eric for the first time in what felt like eons; COOKING VIDEO. I WILL NEVER SHUT UP ABOUT IT. Nor will I shut up about the fact that Dele dropped that bomb mere days after Eric’s “I see you” on insta (Spurs took three months to release the damn video. Imagine that). OLYMPIAKOS. Eric’s framed jersey!! In his living room!! Since around September (bet y’all didn’t know that, huh), and it was moved to an unknown location only after the robbery - can’t blame him there. That’s a prized possession. *Liking* Eric’s post after the incident in the stands, the first since MARCH OF 2019. THE SIGNIFICANCE. Nonnie, I could keep going because there’s just SO MUCH he’s done in a time of “secrecy”. It blows my mind.  Eric - This man. From day one he understood Dele didn’t have a ton of good influence in his life and vowed to fix that. Dele became part of his family, his friend group. He defended him when necessary. Not just because he was playing the part of spokesman for the team. He *knows* Dele. Knows his heart and soul. Knows how to distinguish the Dele he spends time with versus the Dele the media (and Harry) want us to see. Unlike a lot of fans across all forms of social media, Eric has ALWAYS accepted Dele for who he is and where he came from. He does not look at their “differences” in a negative light, but instead opts to agree that opposite do indeed attract - they’re proof. When he spoke about football bringing people from all different worlds together? He had just been speaking about Dele. Eric is highly aware that were it not for their *one* common interest, *one* common goal, they may have never found each other. The beautiful thing about Eric (ha) is that he can be separated from Dele in public, he can be denied the opportunity to talk about him, defend him, etc. But he’s still gonna find a way to show just how much of a role Dele plays in his life. “Separation anxiety @dele” was January 2019. A month after Eric’s emergency appendectomy - a time when, other than the picture of them on Spurs insta the first day Eric was cleared weeks prior (the same day Dele mentioned him on insta live, mhmm), those two may as well have been living on different planets. What “separation anxiety”? When were they hanging out? Unless... 👀😉 I could do this for hours, but let me stop before I *really* say too much. This is only the start. 

[william-t-sickofyourshit]

William blushed a little at the mention of cake, staring down at his tea shyly. Ah, really he already knew that Sebastian will go out of his way for that. But he was very happy that his friend wanted to do so much for him. Wanted to make the day special. "Yes, it will be so much fun. I can't wait." he smiled softly, looking up from above his cup. "Oh and... I've invited two of my friends from the seminar. Priests. So.. you will get to meet them." he said, telling that mainly to Eric and Alan, since they didn't yet know.

"Oh really? How nice. I'm looking forward to it." Alan said, polite as always. "We will of course both be there. Eric loves eggnog." he smiled at his partner.

"I sure do!" Eric confirmed, sipping his tea. "Darn it, Father Will... you've been our priests and teacher here for what now... six years? And we have never went out drinking on your birthday before!" he pointed out.

"That's true... but I hope this will change from now on." William hummed, looking over at Sebastian. It was thanks to him, after all, that this whole celebration was happening.

"Aye, you have good influence on him, Seb." Eric chuckled, patting Sebastian's back.

They chatted and drank tea for a while, other teachers gradually joining them in the faculty room. But eventually it got late, and the bell rang, announcing that classes were starting. Eric pulled Alan for a kiss before they left the room. "I will see you at lunch, love." he murmured, and again William noticed how they shared this look... after 3 years together still so in love, still not able to get enough of each other... ah, William felt warmth and tingling in his chest, and he was just s tiny bit jealous too.

For I have sinned...

The principal cleared his throat, eyes scanning the notes that he had wrote down before this meeting. It already lasted an hour, and the teachers gathered in the faculty room were becoming restless and bored. But indeed there were some things to discuss, with the concert that the senior class was supposed to perform at the end of the semester, and with recent staff changes. 

William glanced down at his watch, sighing softly. His class was starting in 15 minutes, so at least, whether the meeting will be done soon or not, he will get to excuse himself. He looked out of the window, his mind wandering. Principal’s voice turned into white noise in the background. It was a pleasant day, late summer. But William was looking forward to a slightly cooler weather. Wearing all black could really be bothersome at times. 

“And lastly, I am pleased to announce that we have finally found replacement for the violin teacher. Dear Mr Tanaka, may he rest in peace, was with us for so many years that I’ve been concerned we won’t be able to find someone as good as to fill this position.” the principal spoke. “But Mr… Michaelis, was highly recommended to me, and he indeed has impressive references. He will be starting this week, so please welcome him warmly once he will arrive. Ah yes… about that. He will arrive today at noon, I need someone to pick him up from the train station and bring over for the tour around the school. Any volunteers?” 

William was barely listening, and definitely not paying much attention. He glanced at his watch again, and saw that it was time to leave, as his class was about to start. He raised his hand to excuse himself, and little did he know, he just volunteered.

“Father William! Excellent!” the principal exclaimed. “Just don’t be late, the train arrives at noon.”

“Train…?” William questioned, raising his brow. He had a feeling he was missing something…

***

Right after the meeting, William had to run for the class, so he had little time to clarify what exactly he had volunteered for. He was a piano teacher in this Music Academy, but also he served as a priest in local church. Well respected, and rather liked. So when he later found out it was about the new violin teacher, he didn’t refuse. Who, other than himself, would be a better choice to introduce a newcome to their community?

So even though he raised his hand by accident, he accepted this fate.

After classes, at noon, William took a taxi and drove to the train station, to pick up their new teacher. Wearing black trousers, and a black shirt with a thin tie, was absolutely dreadful in this weather, so William quickly found shelter under the roof of the station platform, that provided some shade.

The train had just arrived. William had no idea how Mr Michaelis looked like, but he figured he will just look for someone carrying a violin case with them. 

He was in for a bit surprise.

@crazyvik97