#i really could not care less if you disagree with the actual literal game

[toomanycharr]

A reminder that male and female charr have different horn/ear set ups!

(Of course, do what you want but- It seems a lot of newer charr people just don't know!)

[h0nkch0c0late]

i will literally do anything for jordan li x fem reader

enemies to lovers

Oh my God anon you are setting me up for such a good plot....you have too much faith in me.

Top Five

Jordan Li x Reader

SUMMARY: You and Jordan had always fought about everything. Whether it was because of something you two disagreed on, or a simple topic, but it was always mainly due to your Top Five rankings. While Marie was put in #1, you stayed in place at #3. As they say: the enemy to your enemy is your friend :)

WARNINGS: swearing, slight Gen V spoilers, implications of sex (not specifically written)

You and Jordan had been enemies since you could remember. Both of your parents had been close friends, and thought that their children would be the same.

That had never been the case, though, as you two had been each other's sworn enemies since the day you had met.

Why? Neither of you really had a reason. It had nothing to do with your powers, and most times your arguments had no real...argument. just pointless yelling.

But then, as you grew up, and you both entered Godolkin, it became more than just pointless arguments.

You spent every day trying to prove who the better person was. Which one was liked best, which one performed the best, etc...

It didn't help your case that Jordan was all buddy-buddy with the headmaster, Professor Brink, which let them be in with the popular crowd.

That didn't prevent you from being #3 for the top five, of course, but you were still upset.

---------------------------

Its not like you weren't friends with the "popular" crowd either, being friends with Cate Dunlap and Andre Anderson had its perks.

The only downside was that you were constantly in the same room with Jordan when you all hung out together, and she INSISTED on glaring at you every time.

Your response to it was always sticking your tongue out at them like a child, to which they always rolled their eyes.

To you two, it was like a game of cat and mouse, and neither of you could figure out which was which.

To your friend group's eyes on the other hand, it was a game of "who will kiss who" first. They saw your constant fighting as blatant flirting that neither of you were willing to admit.

So, when Marie Moreau came to the school, and Luke had killed himself along with killing Brink, you two finally had someone to be genuinely enemies with.

After all, the enemy to your enemy is your friend, right?

So, while Jordan was thrown to #5, and Marie moved up to #1, you couldn't stop glaring at Marie every time you walked past her.

-----------------------------------------------

As you walked down the path towards the dorm rooms, you had noticed Jordan standing there, clearly upset.

Ever since their rating had gone down, it was like they were a ghost to the rest of the school. You could relate, however, as being #3 wasn't as nice when the top 2 were being practically worshipped for something they hadn't even done.

So, gathering up your courage, you walked over to him, lips casted into a frown, "you okay?"

Her upset expression turned into one of annoyance (defense mechanism due to the fact her enemy was talking to her), and she groaned, "why do you care?"

You rolled your eyes, expecting nothing less from the supe in front of you, "because ever since Marie got to #1 and you got pushed, you've become a ghost. And you seemed pretty upset so...I don't know."

"You're still #3. You shouldn't be caring about anybody who's below you." They scoffed, their eyes refusing to meet yours.

You sighed, "the enemy to my enemy is my friend, I guess? Look, Jordan," You paused for a moment, "I know we aren't the best of friends, but I just wanted to make sure you were okay. I know how close you and Brink were and what happened fucking sucks."

Jordan's eyes moved to look at you, her frown slightly disappearing as she noticed that you actually genuinely cared. "Yeah, I'm fine."

You tilted your head, furrowing your eyebrows as you knew that they were lying, "there's no need to lie to me. We may hate each other but I do know you."

Jordan sighed, "can we not do this here?"

You gave them a look of confusion, "Okay...where do you wanna-"

You were cut off by Jordan taking your hand and dragging you off to their dorm room, and suddenly you found yourself sitting on their bed as they began to pace around. "Of course I'm not okay! Marie took all of the credit for something she didn't even do! She fucking took off! She ran! And it seems like I'm the only one pissed the fuck off about it because come ON! you did more than her! You actually tried to talk to him! You tried to talk him down and yeah it didn't work but you tried! And I fought him! Where the fuck is our credit, huh?!" Jordan ranted, getting angrier by the second.

Your frown deepened as you watched Jordan get heated, "Look, yeah, I'm angry I didn't get any credit, but at the end of the day, the rankings aren't that important to me. And yeah, I'm stuck at #3, but it's been like that for a while. I'm fine with not getting any credit because at the end of the day, it wouldn't have changed anything. You would have been #1, and Andre would have been #2. I care more about the fact that I lost a friend." You explained, standing up and walking over to Jordan, grabbing their hands in your own to stop their pacing.

She stopped in her tracks, her eyes downcast at your interlocked hands, head low to hide the rising blush that began to cover her cheeks.

"But I thought you did care. Yknow, our constant fighting and all?" Jordan questioned.

You chuckled, "Jordan, I constantly fought with you because thats what we do. We're supposed to be enemies, remember? Enemies fight."

Jordan stared at your hands for a bit longer before gathering the courage and looking up, "what if...what if I don't wanna be enemies anymore?"

Your brows furrowed in confusion, "what do you-"

You were cut off by Jordan planting their lips on your own, and you didn't hesitate to kiss back as your hands let go of their's and cupped their face.

And soon enough, you were back on her bed.

---------------------------------------------------------

It's a little rushed but fuck it we ball 😎

Also, how do we feel about me calling yall gentlebitches bc I find it kinda funny

[flagellant]

I’m a trans Jew and I know you can’t actually verify that because this is anon but (1) even if you could see my profile that wouldn’t prove anything, people can lie on the internet and (2) no way am I putting myself out here on this topic, people are crazy, I don’t want to be harassed

But like, I don’t really care that much about JKR. You want to play a game? Fine, play it, but donate at least as much to a trans or jewish charity. Fine, participate in fandom, but spend ~as much time and effort on fighting transphobia and antisemitism.

(I know the common refrain, that activism/money don’t matter as much as the symbol of playing the game, but that’s bullshit, money and activism are more helpful than the game is harmful)

Obviously other Jews and trans people disagree. That’s cool, we’re not a monolith, and my opinion isn’t a weapon to be used by people as “giving permission” for them to be uncritical JKR fans. But you can choose to be a fan of a thing and still support people who are harmed by the creator of that thing, and I really doubt that most people who do that are doing more harm than good. I don’t like criticizing people for being less-than-perfect.

Anyway. I kinda doubt you’ll post this. Big fan of your blog, even though we disagree sometimes. I hope you have a nice day and that my rant hasn’t been too annoying.

"Its actually fine to be a fan of the books The Protocols of the Elders of Zion and Atlas Shrugged, just donate to Jewish charities and spend the same amount of time that you post about Atlas Shrugged building up your community!" you're, respectfully, insane, and while i know i'm goy and therefore don't speak as an authority myself i feel like this is absolutely not a valid "two jews three opinions" situation and i am under literally zero obligation to respect you and your feelings any more than i would a Log House Republican

[sapphic-scylla]

First Impression Best to Worst Boss Fights in Shadow of the Erdtree

DLC has been out for a minute and I’ve done my initial runthrough and taken as much as I could from it. Suffice to say, I did love it a lot and thought that it has a solid amount of staying power. This list covers the main bosses only (and a few notable side bosses) and as usual, unless you don’t care about SPOILERS, I recommend not reading past this point:

Midra, Lord of Frenzied Flame: Now, already, I feel like people are gonna disagree with me. Hear me out. When I first hit this fight, I was like “they integrated a PVP-centric status condition into a boss fight. How is that fair?”. And then I thought about it for a second. No fight style makes this fight easier. No weapon, no spell, no armor makes this fight easier. It is as you see it. This man’s attacks can cover almost an entire room, snipe you from a thousand miles away, his melee attacks hit like a train, and builds up your Frenzy, which can leave you vulnerable and chunk your health and FP. But, he also is easy to stagger, he doesn’t move very fast, and his attacks are telegraphed a year in advance. It’s perfect. He doesn’t have a ton of health, but he is absolutely savage. He’s what difficulty SHOULD be and the sigh of satisfaction when you beat him is REAL. You can’t really cheese or simplify this boss beyond KILL HIM and it’s so refreshing to find a boss that no matter your choice of loadout, Midra will keep you on your toes in the most horror game-like way. Also lore wise, the vibes in this entire area were unsettling and immaculate and the “Eyes of Sauron/Winter Lantern” enemies actually made me jump in that horror game fun way and I adored it.

Messmer, The Impaler/Base Serpent: Now, this was the fight I forced myself to learn through sheer force of will. I literally slammed my head against this man for a day because I knew that the only thing that was killing me was my own arrogance and IT PAID OFF. By the end when I finally beat him, I adored this fight. This man lets you fucking have it, but at no point did it ever seem unfair or bullshit or, hell, even free. This fight is a perfect mix of cinematic, difficult, and a riot to learn and improve at and I genuinely look forward to this fight each playthrough now.

Rellana, Twin Moon Knight: A scaled-up version of my favorite base game Dark Souls 3 boss and she didn’t disappoint. Incredible fight, solidly learnable, and definitely one of the highlights of my first runthrough.

Bayle the Dread: The quickest love-hate relationship I’ve ever had the pleasure to wade through. In my first ten tries, I could not help but think “this is the worst. What can I do against this man except die?”. But the more I fought him, the more I enjoyed it and the more fair I found it. He is overwhelming, yes, but his tells are obvious and when you recognize the areas his attacks affect, he becomes a lot less oppressive. He also has the greatest phase 2 transition of all time. I mean my love for Placie has grown over the past few months, but I think Bayle edges out for Second place in best Dragon fights in Elden Ring. Fortissax takes first.

Scadutree Avatar: This fucker seems easy at first, and then he starts driving around. I severely underestimated this boss at first due to how much damage he was taking compared to everything else. Then he hits second phase and until then, I’d never been jumpscared by a sunflower before. Still not the hardest boss by any means, but definitely checks you at the door.

Romina, Saint of the Bud: I mean, outside of the obvious, I don’t know why I enjoyed this fight. Her rushdown is legendary and she deals in Scarlet Rot, so you’d think I would hate this fight. But her tactics ended up being fairly straightforward, her Rot wasn’t as oppressive as I thought it would be, and she really is such an aesthetically pleasing fight.

Putrescent Knight: The goofiest looking creature on this list by far, but this dude kicked my ass several times. He definitely came with his fair share of surprises, but he never felt overly obnoxious or overstayed his welcome. Not the most fun fight, but definitely worthy of more praise than scorn.

Allies of Miquella: Debated putting this in here because it’s more of a PVP standoff than a boss fight, but I feel it’s worth a mention. Nothing particularly exciting, but it definitely is much more of a marathon than I was expecting and a very difficult one at that. Come prepared here. These people don’t pull punches.

Ghostflame Dragons: More a mention than anything. Nothing unique, but it did force me to rethink how to fight dragons a la Darkeater Midir which I enjoyed.

Metyr, Mother of Fingers: Well, we had to hit the lower half eventually. Metyr doesn’t have a ton of health which puts her up here, but I generally dislike bosses that remind me of The One Reborn where it feels like no matter where you hit the boss, you’re still being dealt damage just for walking up to it which, I’m sure, incentivizes spellcasters, but frustrating nonetheless.

Promised Consort Radahn: Malenia without all of the charm and enjoyment. Malenia, I still firmly believe takes the cake in terms of hardest (and best) boss in Elden Ring, but Radahn did not skimp on the difficulty round two. That being said, his move set is far less enjoyable to learn than Malenia’s and often, it just felt the impressive amount of health and the absolutely unhinged amount of capable range this man has is unjustifiable. Plus, Malenia invites aggression and allows for so many ways to contest her despite her making you work for it while Radahn just hurts. Pain for the sake of improvement is great. Pain for the sake of pain is a lot less fun.

Ancient Dragon Senessax: I did not think that the thing that would make me hate a fight like Lansseax or Fortissax would be just setting the damn thing in a pool of water, but here we are. The lightning AOE’s in this fight are ruthless and are a lot less avoidable for how much they stagger on a regular day. Definitely not the worst, but not a fun development.

Golden Hippopotamus: This thing definitely killed more innocent players than real hippos do every year in real life. This thing SUCKS to fight. Camera monsters in general are just a pain, but when half of your screen is covered in porcupine quills (yes, YOU HEARD ME), this thing becomes substantially more of a drag. That and this abomination punches above its weight class and I just generally found this fight as entertaining as a mosquito bite.

Commander Gaius: Fuck this man. I’ve never had a dude kill me so consistently or so consecutively in the first 5 seconds of the fight. It’s been a minute since a boss legitimately made me yell at my TV screen and I did not welcome the experience. Also, this man had absolutely no right or privilege to ride my ass this fucking hard unless he bought me dinner first. Will not enjoy revisiting this dude.

Divine Beast Dancing Lion: Brace yourself. This is gonna be a long one. I apologize in advance. *breathe in* *heavy sigh* I’ve never actively thought any boss in any Dark Souls game was purely unwarranted or worthy of true hatred. Despite all of the bosses I dislike fighting across all FromSoft games, I always attempted to find a bright side or something like lore or environment or something to justify its existence and I had succeeded. Until I met this fucking thing. This menace didn’t have the most kills on me (that goes to Malenia and Messmer) or did anything in particular that actively exploited my playstyle (like Maliketh, Mohg, or the Crucible Duo). This cockroach merely existed and it was enough. Its body is a giant blob. Its hitbox is horrific. It punishes aggression. It punishes passivity. This thing has ranged attacks, melee attacks, magical attacks, passive effects, movement patterns, retaliatory tactics, and even him just looking at me hits like a goddamn truck. He is so hard to read and does so much damage and does the most unhinged, wtf follow-ups that I’ve ever seen with the most hairpin trigger aggression I’ve ever experienced in my life. He does frost damage, lightning damage, physical damage, I’m pretty sure there is fire damage in there somewhere, emotional damage, and mood damage. And, to top it all off, THERE’S A FUCKING SECOND ONE OUT IN THE BOONIES THAT IS EVEN FUCKING WORSE. Basilisks have been in the Soulsborne conglomerate for as long as I can remember and I’ve tolerated their existence until FOUR OF THEM WANDER INTO THIS FUCKING FIGHT AT THE BEGINNING OF PHASE 2. THIS LION HAS A DEATH BLIGHT PHASE. You know, the one status effect in Elden Ring that INSTANTLY KILLS YOU. And the best part? If you don’t kill him fast enough, HE CAN DO IT AGAIN. It would not surprise me if the same sadist that came up with the Double Gargoyle fight came up with this one. And like I said, he doesn’t have the most health I’ve ever seen, but it doesn’t fucking matter. The only thing that matters is how fast you can remove his health because he WILL kill you if you give him any leeway. I fought this thing twice and I know about as much about how to fight this thing as I did the first time I walked into its arena. I succeeded twice by SHEER DUMB LUCK. I despise this thing and if I could actively avoid it, I would not hesitate.

[ganondoodle]

just to note this, as much as i love botw, i am not uncritical of it, like while i personally like the weapon breaking and rain mechanics everyone else seemed to hate i do agree that the bosses and dungeons were kinda repetetive and there could have been more bigger sidequests, some more diverse epic music tracks also wouldnt have hurt tho i fully disagree with anyone trying to claim it didnt HAVE music, im convinced those people played it with sound off bc wth (edit. plus the unfortunately still orientalist design of the gerudo plus that belly dancer outfit for link ... that thankfully got removed in totk as far as i know but the rest still stands)

personal criticism id have that i would have prefered zelda never gaining her sacred powers but instead finding a different way to fight back, bc her gaining them like that kinda made rhoams abuse .. right, like turns out to activate her powers you need to literall kill everyone she cares about (at least thats why i feel a bit meh about that), her maybe not being as sidelined like that (tho youd have to change alot for that .. which totk had the perfect chance to and then kinda did it again but worse lol) and the yiga clan being less of one little side mission

(also way too many people kept hating on botw for the same few reasons, often without giving it a chance, i think we all heard all the endless complaints about usually little things so i dont need to retread all of that)

alot of those little criticism things got adressed in totk, which i LIKED, but overall its so much less in harmony, this should have been a game about rebuilding and recovering about working together and then zelda gets immediately booted off and we get introduced to characters we never learn enough of to really care and yet they still take away the mystery botw had left us for the world to feel more alive, they ripped out parts that were so internally organically connected to the world and pretended they never mattered nor existed, characters act off and i cant help but feel like the main 'plot' is, as much as i hate to use that comparison, a badly written fanfiction ... it builds on nothing and just leaves you .. or me at least feeling empty, like i am playing through a mockery of the game i loved ... like all the fun i had thinking about the things in botw, the theories you could come up with was all wasted time

i honestly cant describe it better than totk, despite the little QoL changes, and the changes i DID like, it just feels ... empty? not in a literal way but more ... mentally? it feels so shallow? like at multiple points i felt like the game was actively mocking me, when i reached the shrine of life and was faced with barren walls and a puddle of water i felt betrayed for caring so much about what botw had done .. i felt like i could hear the game laughing while i stood there not knowing what to think of it, and while this was the time when i felt the most actually physically compeltely betrayed, that feeling of being mocked kept happening, i kept feeling like i was treated like a dumb player character that just eats up anything they say without thinking or remembering the title this was supposedly a sequel of, like i should play with the little toys of glueing things together and forget the world around me like a 5 year old

that may sound harsh but that is how i, personally, feel about it

[marina-the-witch]

My Souls Hot Takes

Decided to write up a couple of my less popular opinions for souls games. Please don't get upset over any of these, if you disagree that's totally valid

Dark Souls 1:

Bell Gargoyles is my favorite base game boss

I don't like Ornstein and Smough that much

Gwyn's theme is nowhere near as sad or dramatic as its made out to be in my opinion

Painted World isnt fun to me at all

Tomb of the Giants isnt that bad

I miss the whimiscal 80s fantasy aesthetic the series lost in the following entries even if i understand it narratively

Dark Souls 2:

I'm not just a hater or fail to appreciate an underrated gem, I simply dont enjoy this game

I think Darklurker is mid and the runback gimmick is stupid

The world and lore arent that much better to me than any other souls games and dont save the game

Life Gems are actually pretty okay

Old Dragonslayer is really not that big of a deal

Royal Rat Vanguard is the single worst boss in souls to me

Fume Knight is just kinda alright to me, I enjoy Sir Alonne much more

The health cap loss fucking sucks i hate it

Its perfectly fine to both love and hate this game please calm tf down

Dark Souls 3:

Soul of Cinder isnt that exciting, I might just be biased though bc i started the DS games with 3

Jailers arent that bad, Thralls are way worse

Ancient Wyvern kinda funny tbh

I really really dislike Sister Friede

The random wolf guy in ariandel is the wost boss in 3

Corvian Knights are the coolest enemy in the trilogy

The game isnt actually as ugly and monotone as people say

Pontiff Sulyvahn is sooooo mid to me I could not care less for his parry bait jojo stand ass goofy fight

Yhorm is such a nothing boss without the siegward narrative to me

Demon Prince solos literally any other duo boss and its not even close

R1 and O spam is a dark souls staple to me, not DS3 exclusive at all

Dragonslayer Armor and Oceiros are insanely underrated

Sekiro:

Demon of Hatred actually slaps

Corrupted Monk actually slaps

Great Shinobi Owl is really mid to me, too gimmicky

Guardian Ape has the same issues as DoH just to a lesser extend

The 2 giant beast (serpent and carp) area hazards are so good

Souls should give underwater another shot imo

Most of the minibosses are kinda bad to me

Bloodborne:

Laurence is actually peak

Not really a fan of Maria's fight, gonna replay the game soon to see if it'll finally click

Winter Lanters are pretty cool

Micolash fans are weird why are there so many

Yharnam Sunrise is the most boring ending of any souls game

As much as i would love it, I cant feasibly see a logical contuination of the Bloodborne universe

Saw Spear mid idc

Chalice Dungeons are both infinitely better and worse than people say I really dont know how to feel about them

Simon's Bowblade is one of the coolest weapons in fiction

Elden Ring:

Morgott is underrated

Dragons are underrated

Placidusax's theme is kinda eh to me

Radahn and Malenia are equal, both fandoms can stfu, it said fought to a standstill for a reason

Rykard is genuinely a good fight even with the gimmick in mind

I don't care for vyke, frenzy, shabriri or any other madness hoobla

I hate using great spears so much

Summons are VALID. If they were cheating they wouldnt be in the game. Get over yourself

Idc how much you can counter it I dont like malenia's waterfowl dance and health regain

Godskin Duo isn't that bad, the REAL enemy is valiant gargoyles

Royal Revenants, Birds and Runebears at least have the decency to be rare... Imps and Lobsters though

Volcano Manor is underrated as fuck, such a unique level for a souls game with so much cool lore and visual flare

[hsrlorefreak]

okay WHAT IS THIS.

(Guardian of the Shoreline: drift bottle V) because i swear that in this game only really important/related text is highlighted gold like that. and this? this is a random daily quest. it didn’t do anything after.

i’m looking at the wiki and it doesn’t say that trailblazer says that line. who is that. because i thought it was just a game mechanic mocking you but that might have actual story significance?

there’s even more if you say you disagree. except only elation gets a repeat, and Aha’s simulated universe appearance is. interesting, considering they’re the only one to realize that they’re not the actual aeons.

not remembrance, but elation.

but back to the not-trailblazer narrating. because you would assume it’s just their thoughts, yeah? like any other game. but we do have that already, and they’re labeled trailblazer.

so who is narrating when it’s not?

right now, without anything else to go by(?), it honestly might be elio.

we have like, zero knowledge of who he is other than that the ipc wants him captured unharmed and alive unlike the rest of the stellaron hunters and that he’s probably a cat. but he could just be controlling it.

but the trailblazer has the option to make references that don’t quite make sense to the other characters, even though herta has been around for quite some time and is a genius (albeit one who loses motivation easily).

and elio is “cursed/blessed” with future sight, but that’s just the ioc’s description of him. the stellaron hunters talk about “his future” and “his script” and if kafka wasn’t lying during her truth and lies game in her companion mission? trailblazer is artificially made. according to blade, who has literally zero reason to lie, trailblazer followed kafka around, before they were left in herta’s space station.

there’s a theory canon idea thing that elio is the cat that was in Scene 47 Jepella Rebellion that was watching, which is great, but hsr is great at making your choices matter but not at the same time.

you get different endings, technically, but the main story will go on (elio’s script) will go on no matter what you do. even if you choose to not go to kafka and blade, they escape the xianzhou luofu anyway.

i don’t think the trailblazer *is* elio, but i think he’s more involved with them than anyone in the story realizes, just because there’s so little information about the stellaron hunters in general, and even less so about elio.

anyway.

is this implying that your dialogue options might actually change what path you go on in future story? that seems really unlikely but like. what if.

trailblazer might recognize elio, if they see him. i know kafka says she’s the only one that trailblazer recognized, they probably won’t see him in penacony, but i do think he’ll show himself not soon, but not like. final boss battle late.

i wonder if elio actually cares about trailblazer at all, since he presumably had hands in their creation.

or not, since he put them in kafka’s care for at least as long as blade’s been with the stellaron hunters.

i really, really hope penacony is cool.

[beanieman]

I fucking hate the names "logic route" and "emotion route". it's precisely fucking backwards. Killing Shin, the one who has been a thorn in your side and will obviously continue this trend if you kill Kanna instead of him, is objectively the logical choice. Conversely, killing Kanna is the emotional choice made for emotional reasons, either being to ensure Kanna doesn't suffer anymore, to give someone hopeless like Shin a chance to survive, or for some players I've seen, to spite Shin.

Also: literally zero point in the entire game actually uses those terms

I actually disagree with your points!

There's a wide variety of reasons the player might vote for Shin or Kanna, and they could come from a place of emotion or logic. For example, I'm a logic player that voted for Kanna because I want Shin to have a chance to survive. Which is an emotional reason.

However, Sara has a canon reason for voting for Shin or Kanna that can differ for the player. If she votes for Shin it's because she hates him despite his useful hacking abilities. If she votes for Kanna, she actually says that she voted with logic because she see's Kanna as less valuable then Shin despite caring more about her.

So Sara has her own reasons for voting that are separated from the player. For Shin her decision to save him is logical, while her choice to save Kanna is emotional. And she does use logic to describe her choice if you kill Kanna.

Even if you disagree with me, I really like the route names. I think It's a good way to keep track of things and writing "Emotion Route" flows better than "The Route Where Kanna Lives." Plus I'm very lazy and don't want to type out the three extra words.

[mdhwrites]

hey this is kinda short n random but DUDE.

thanks for putting your thoughts out into the world. srsly. your critiques and insightful, genuine, thoughtful writings about some of my fav shows (amphibia, toh) and games (hsr) have given me real moments to sit back and think on lots of things.

you're excellent at clearly stating a point without antagonizing or trashing the other side of the argument, and always seem clear and well-spoken. that's hard to find in analysis or "hot take" style blogs, ESPECIALLY when it comes to writing.

it's hard to get mad at anything you've put down, and easy to let it actually bring up interesting questions to chew on. also, your writing is very enjoyable and fun- I'm gonna see if I can snag me a copy of Crises Girlfriends soon!

keep doing your thing, man. it's great

Thank you. All of this genuinely means a lot to me, especially, frankly, the part about avoiding antagonizing or belittling the other side. My ability to speak my thoughts clearly and bring points together is just kind of part of how my brain is put together (only half of which I can blame on being on the spectrum maybe) but the concept of not being an asshole while I try to make a point wasn't something I always had.

That's not just me being humble either. I lived with a friend for two years, helping take care of their mom while they helped give me a place to exist while dealing with my depression, and they straight up told me that who they had known five years before then wouldn't have been allowed on their couch. I literally stopped being a part of Discord or Skype groups (to really date this) for I think at least three years because I would spend so much of my time just trying to prove I was right. To win and show how superior I was.

The change from needing to be right and instead to simply have a conversation/debate was a major change to how I saw analysis and ended up the way I am. Not to say my emotions never get the better of me, not helped by when I got into analysis being when The Nostalgia Critic reigned supreme (I haven't watched him in well over half a decade now), but I try to keep it more about the work itself. I've even talked about in multiple blogs how my opinion blogs are less just about reviewing things or the like (again, not perfect, especially with TOH) but instead a lot more about teaching lessons and thoughts on things that I think can genuinely help people.

To that end, belittling others is counterintuitive. For as upset as I get with the Amphibia fandom about their takes on the ending, I do empathize with them. I can understand why they wish for the ending they wanted, even if I disagree on it being better. I can see a lot of why TOH, especially as someone's first big fantasy work, would mean a lot to them and draw them in and be something special, even if a long term fantasy fan might find a lot of it trying too hard. Not only is that approach more humane but it also allows for better analysis because for as easy as it can be to say how something is bad, it's a lot harder to genuinely address why that work may also be popular. At least, you know, without being an asshole and going "It's wish fulfillment so only losers who want to escape this world could enjoy it." That's reductive and useful to literally no one.

Anyways, I think that's more than enough bragging? shrug On my part. Again, thank you so much and I hope you enjoy Crises Girlfriends when you get the chance! Have a good day everyone and see you next tale.

[sammygender]

8, 10 and 12 for the violence ask game ✨️

ask game

8. common fandom opinion everyone is wrong about

im trying to not go for the easy ones here and am pretending that 'fandom' means me and mutuals and mutual adjacents. so here's a controversial one that i think i disagree w a lot of people on: john definitely hit them. not necessarily regularly, but enough that it was still part of their experience of him.

and this isnt even because i think it makes sense for his character, though i do, and it's not bc i think it's more interesting that way or anything, because it isn't whatsover. it's just because i think supernatural, the show, wants us to think he hit them. its intentional on the parallels it draws even if it refuses to ever say it directly (because it refuses to say ANYTHING directly, come on, this is like spn stone number 1, every core theme is alluded to).

ive been steadfast on this since 1x14 (nightmare) which is the first (of many other) episodes to intentionally parallel sam and/or dean to kids with physically abusive parents. u can make a case this is about hunting as physical abuse by proxy -which in the case of nightmare it kind of is and i could see! - but its not just about that, especially looking at, say, 7x03 (the girl next door). i have better posts about this somewhere so i wont go into detail so this isnt too long.. cause these keep being WAY too long.

10. worst part of fanon

there really is so much in mainstream spn fandom that this took me a while. but my absolute hatred is for Dean Winchester Is Sam Winchester's Parent. yes that is an ao3 tag. yes i have even probably tagged my shit with that ao3 tag before. I DON'T CARE. deangirls, PICK A SIDE. if dean is sam's sole parental figure and john is an afterthought (just blatantly canonically not true but wtv).... that makes dean absolutely AWFUL for the way he treats sam in multiple pre-canon episodes nevermind in canon. and that literally is not even fair to dean. yes dean's parentified and in some ways i am sure he 'raised sam' but 1. hes not Actually sam's dad and 2. most importantly, if he WAS, he certainly would not be a GOOD dad. he is a child too for most of the time he's 'raising' sam.

half the tragedy is that he can't be a good parental figure, no matter how much he wants to. because he's not capable. because he's four years older. because he doesn't have a good parental figure himself. he occupies this weird position with more authority than brother and less knowledge than parent. hes left alone to feed and look after and control sam but he's still shouting in his face and shoving him and belittling him but you can't even blame him because he's twelve (plot of spn christmas ep). sorry thats so fucked up and so interesting actually. like please. can we look at the power dynamic here. oh and the people going 'dean was sam's real dad!!' are the same people who then insist sam and dean have an equal relationship. Girl what??

12. the unpopular character you actually like and why more people should like them

answered here, but tldr: late seasons lucifer.

[epickiya722]

burnin’

My first impression: I was immediately taken back by her character design. The green flaming hair, claws, and fangs? I was here for that!

My impression now: Burnin has jumped on the list of my favorite BNHA characters. She's just so fun! Even her bits in BNHA: Vigilantes made me happy. (If there is a BNHA spin-off you should take interest in, it's Vigilantes.) Out of all the fire users, she's my favorite.

Favorite thing about that character: As I mentioned, I really like Burnin's design. She's literally a hothead, but I love that for her. Also, her quirk. She's can take chunks of her hair flames and throw them at people or shape them into weapons. She can also fly! Like, out of all fire related quirks, that's probably the most creative.

Least favorite thing: I hate there's little backstory for her. If there's one sidekick I want some backstory on, it's her.

Favorite line/scene: In the OVA, the one with Mr. Smiley, Burnin has this scene where she got so mad she wanted to shoot Mr. Smiley with a rocket launcher. Meanwhile, Kido and Onima are just staring at her like "... maybe you should calm down". That had me laughing. 😆

Favorite interaction that character has with another: There may not be a lot of scenes, but I love her, Kido and Onima as a trio. Other then the whole rocket launcher scene, there's this bit in Vigilantes where they go "FLAMING SIDEKICKERS" and I just love that.

A character that I wish that character would interact with more: If you have followed me for long enough, you already know I need her and Miruko to interact. Not even just for shipping intent, but I would to see how those two would act around each other.

Another character from another fandom that reminds me of that character: The only one that really comes to mind is that flame from Howl's Moving Castle, Calcifer. Oh, wait, every time I heard Burnin in dub, I think of Musa. I remember first hearing her and childhood memories came at me. I grew watching Winx Club, so I'm going to know Lisa Ortiz's voice. (So yeah, I also know she voiced Amy Rose, and in Winx Club, Lisa also voiced Icy, Digit, and Mitzi.)

A headcanon about that character: Okay, if you read my BurnBunny fics, you may notice that I sometimes describe Burnin's hair another color other than its usual yellow-green color. It's because I headcanon that depending on her mood or what she's doing, her hair flames changes colors. Think it would be neat if her hair could do that.

A song that reminds of that character: Fire Again by Ashnikko! Love that song, just give me Burnin vibes. I actually didn't really know it was a sing for Valorant, at first! Which is funny to me because Burnin looks like she belongs in a video game. Put her ass in Mortal Kombat! I want to see fatalities she can do!

An unpopular opinion about that character: Someone is gonna disagree but... Now, in 349, she mentions how Endeavor is good at his job, but she couldn't care less about his family affairs and I know some people gave her heat for that (hee hee), but personally, I'm on the same page. Whatever the Todorokis had going on isn't her business and at this time, defeating the villains is a priority. Of course, what Endeavor did to his family is terrible and I bet Burnin would also be horrified by it. The time to be involved in their family issues is just not appropriate. And it's not like the Todorokis want everyone to be involved in their business, fight their battles and whatnot. Storywise, it makes no sense for Burnin or anyone else to even be involved with the Todorokis dealing with Dabi. Personally, I just feel like some people wanted to hate on a female character.

Favorite picture: Remember how I mentioned the rocket launcher scene? That's one of the pictures!

Send Me a Character...✨️

[dewphox]

I can’t believe people would use a being that is a homage to the late Nintendo President, Satoru Iwata, as uwu-waifu bullshit.

So disrespectful.

I see where you're coming from, though I don't think that the way you are going about it is constructive or appropiate at all. Since you're on anon I can't say for sure if you're like 10 or 30, but I'm not mad either way.

So yeah I wanna give an honest answer to this, if anyone else feels the same way and maybe wants to have a discussion (though the whole anon thing feels like talking to a wall) you can really just talk to me. Ngl I am incredibly emotional and quick to get defensive, but the beauty of messages on the internet is is that I can give myself time to calm down and be rational and process these emotions before I respond. So Anon I hope that once you've hopefully seen my response that if you still feel a certain type of way about it that you can maybe give me the same courtesy. I just think that there's enough hate to hate communication on the internet already and I'd honestly truly appreciate the effort.

To start of I think it's ignorant to say that how I choose to enjoy my favourite media is ''uwuw-waifu bullshit''. People enjoy different things in many different ways. The way I do it is no different from D&D. There is a world with lore and characters that i adore and I love it so much that I want to experience it through something I've made. Making a character for a franchise is connected to so much research on the source material, as careful as it was crafted I take the time to think of many different ways to integrate a whole new person that hypothetically could fit like a DLC or you know, my player character (sometime it is more indepth than other times, but I always do research one way or the other).

Being put into Links shoes is a predetermined lens which i can enjoy as it's own story, but to me, I like to be a part of it either with a straight insert or an otherwise character of my own making. A tale of legend and heroic deeds is but one perspective and I love to see in what different ways this story or world can be enjoyed and looked at. And i don't think that this is wrong or something to look down upon. Just as is romance within that world and other bonds and relationships one will create and connect to their creation. Like how I made the windfish my OC's Father.

It is so much more than you make it out to be and I have had so many people throuought my art journey come to me and grief because they were bullied for simply having an oc be romantic with a canon character or god forbid a selfinsert or mary sue (and most of them were children, though I was more sad about the adults who's passion was taken from them before they could fully explore it). It is makebelief and hurts no one just because these people decided to share these scenarios with other people. I hope that in the future you can be less dismissive about that. I think it's important that we take the time to be kind, even if there's something we might disagree with and want to debate.

Now to the main point. To put it simply I think a character is allowed to be it's own entity regardless of intent, if ofcourse the intent isn't explicitly stated. (Like for example when they literally have Barack obama as a character in South park etc. Then that's not a refrence but a depicition) Which in this case it isn't actually. While researching what came up was filled with ''maybe'', ''possibly'', ''probably'' etc. More importantly though the game itself never states it and a game and franchise should always be able to be judged on it's contents alone wihtout outside remarks people may or may not have made.

Then there's also another character within the game. Botrick. His wiki also eludes to the fact that he might be a homage to Satoru. Wikis however are all written by fans and we can all just speculate even if the probability is very likely. The difference however is that Botrick shares a similar appearance with Satoru while the lord of the mountain has a similar name and I think both are tributes in their own right. Though Botrick may be a physical reference while Satori is a sort of spiritual tribute to him as a mentor and guardian figure. But it's still it's own character. Both of these characters aren't Satoru, the same as how actors aren't synonymous with the characters they play.

Also what if someone doesn't do deep dives into wikis and articles and forums? What if someone simply plays the game, enjoys it and make characters, contents AU's for it? What if had only read the genral wiki and not scrolled down to the trivia section where people first brought up it might be a tribute? I don't think that it should be neccessary to first get a bachelors degree in order to enjoy a game in fear of missing a detail that although never mentioned in the game was once maybe hinted at by someone. It feels like a roundabout and tiring way to enjoy a medium. And you should give people a fair chance and not come at them so aggressively, even if you're emotionally charged.

Having said all that, I was actually hesitant to make this idea I had using Satori for the same reason haha. Since I generally don't like characters that are meant to be real life people ( the same I don't like to ship with characters that are in canon relationships (hence i dropped Sidon UU ). With Satori however I felt it's removed enough that it's not an issue for me as explained above.

But I'm not opposed to the idea of changing a few things up! Names are changed in the blink of an eye and i am not uncreative enough to be incabalbe of thinking of different ways to incorporate my design into the lore. I could make it a blupee instead, or a descendant, or otherwise further removed entity with close ties to Satori. (My OC Dreem was close to being something like that before I thought of the windfish!) I simply adore these nature god archetypes like the forest god in princess mononoke and since in it's lore Satori was a sage before that died the idea of a humanoid version wasn't too far off for me.

So yeah, tell me what you think, I'm open for discussion and how other people see it as long as you give me the same courtesy and time that I did to formulate an appropiate response! I hope that we can all be kind to eachother and I wish you all a wonderful day!

[sir-sillybunny]

i have never been so deeply disappointed in a story's ending as i was with this game

it was such an amazing beautiful game. there were so many very intriguing mysteries that had very satisfying answers. it was just so amazing and i was ready to consider it one of my favorite games of all time but then after the end of like chapter 5 i think it just all went downhill.

the story just went in a direction that felt really like boring? and just kind of forced. it started to feel less like i was reading a real story and more like i was a reading a fanfic of the story. like a fix it fix. it was nice to see the characters get a chance at getting fixed but just? idk. their motivations behind what they did were already obvious. we had already seen their personalities and what lives they led before in the first 3 doors. we did not need to it again. it was just the same story again except the characters were wearing costumes. and i slighlty disagree with the message it was trying to push. i understand that revenge is often not worth it and only serves to hurt you more if you seek it and i understand that everyone should get a chance at a new life to change for the better. but i dont believe that morgana was wrong for hating those men as deeply as she did. i agree that she shouldnt have cursed them, to that degree at least. but she had every right to hate them and to want terrible things to happen to them. idk. it was just so frustrating to have to sit through michel talk for hours with morganas murders and sympathize with them about what they did to her. all while knowing that morgana, the girl they were leting fucking die in a locked room, was upstairs from him slowly dying.

i get that the 3 men had the keys to free her but he didnt have to spend as much time with them as he did. the fact that he spent so much time talking with them made him too late to save her and she died anyway. which i guess it wasnt real anyway, he couldnt have actually saved her. but still. she deserved his attention and care more than any of them ever did. all she wanted was someone to save her. she didnt need to understand her murderers stories, she didnt need to feel any sympathy for them. i think if she was saved by someone before she died she wouldnt have turned into the witch after death.

and also????????? why is no one talking about how fucking creepy and literally pedophilic it was that the original jacopo was in love with morgana???????????? when she was 12 and he was 21?????????????????? that happened multiple times in the story. weird age gap relationships that are not at all presented as bad. the first times i noticed it i could chalk it up to trying to being historical accurate or something but that last one was just too much. jacopo literally said he had a crush on a 12 year old girl and that he would "wait for her." until she turned 18. which he didnt even do btw. he told her he was in love with her when she was 16, and attempted to do it before then. it was just gross and completely and utterly unnecessary to add to the game. also im remembering that earlier in the game the player gets asked which of a group of 3 girls he fancies and you had the option to say he fancied one of the girls who was 14 years old !! just so unnecessary to add and so creepy. this game came out in 2012, its not like it would have been normal to think that was okay.

another thing that weirded me out is that giselle in her normal character sprite had a normal sized chest and her dress wasnt all that revealing. but in every cg her tits were huge and basically completely out. in every single cg. theres nothing wrong with that if it was simply part of her style and looks. but it wasnt like that in her character sprite. it took away from the cgs and was just annoying.

it just sucks because up until that point it was such a good game. the music was beautiful, the story was so so good, it was all just so good. but i really wish the game ended when when saw morganas real body for the first time. it should have ended with a big long conversation or something. but instead it was another several hours of gameplay after that about forcing yourself into morganas memories and sympathizing with the men who killed her. it just sucked. even ignoring me disagreeing with the moral of it, it was just bad. we learned nothing in that chapter. every single major thing that got revealed about the mens motivations for what they did was already completely obvious. it just felt like they were trying to make the game longer. and after that the ending i honestly couldnt even pay attention to. i skipped through half of it. which maybe there was some super amazing dialouge in there that compeltely magically fixes all the stuff from before but i doubt it lol. either way the pedophila was still gross. so im deeply disapointed either way.

i spent 30 hours in that game and im never getting them back lmao

[leronboi]

Okay I want to express this but I strongly disagree that Justin is Kei's dad. Out of five billion users, you're telling me that Justin who just so happens to be Kei's dad is pursuing the Beast who just so happens to be his son???? Out of 5 BILLION users. That's such a crazy percentage that I find unbelievable. I call bullshit on that.

I wanna mention that Justin has his own organization, The Justices, and he is the leader. To some degree, he must have formed this group and persuaded these people to join his cause. These people who've joined him must also believe that there must be some kind of policing or order in U. For him to run the Justices, he is sponsored (I'm assuming). So he knows he holds some kind of responsibility and power. The way he uses that power is, of course, bad, but we as an audience don't fully know whether his intentions were bad or good. It is just that his actions are bad.

His obsession and constant pursuit of the Beast could be a factor that supports him being Kei's dad which I have no argument against cuz the movie never really explained why Justin is obsessed with the Beast. It could be because he truly wants to strike fear into others by pursuing the Beast he calls a danger to U or asserting himself as a stronger being. Or he is Kei's dad and he just wants to make his life more miserable. Idk. The point is we don't know Justin's intentions and can only speculate thru his actions.

The way Justin talks and carries himself is something that I consider when comparing him to Kei's dad. He's really bizarre in a way that he belongs in a fictional story with a superhero setting or even a fantasy setting. It's like he's extremely roleplaying without anyone's consent. He's the protagonist of his story. He talks heroically. Idk how to phrase it but he speaks with such confidence and charisma while also being dominating. He acts very theatrical if that's the best way I can describe it. He's a very different person compared to Kei's dad. I also want to mention that Justin was made with the intentions of being American (Link to interview). Not that Kei's dad isn't American but it's the fact that Hosoda had an idea when making him which kinda makes his character different compared to Kei's dad.

We don't get to see Kei's dad that often but when we do, he's a very quiet man, unpredictable and intimidating. You don't know what he's going to do which plays into him being an abusive father. He's quiet and then starts yelling unexpectedly. He is also shown to have little care of the things he owns and breaks. There's not much time to know him but his demeanor differs from Justin's. Yeah he could play a persona when being Justin on U, but we don't know if he uses U.

He is a physically abusive man. The Beast has bruises on his back and in one scene where Suzu and Hiroka were interrogating some users of U, someone mentions that he had less bruises when they met him and throughout the movie, the Beast is getting bruises on his back. Kei's dad also didn't hesitate to hurt Tomo till Kei interfered.

How does that relate to Justin? Well throughout the movie, Justin really doesn't do anything. He tends to have others do his work, threaten people, or use his dox gun. He doesn't ever interact with the Beast. Especially during the Beast's introduction, Justin doesn't fight him nor does he chases him after he leaves. Also during the scene when the Beast saves Belle, Justin doesn't go after him but his goons do. Justin and Kei's dad are similar by the fact that they tend to hurt those weaker than them. Justin threatens Belle and punches and hurts the ai mermaids, and Kei's dad literally abuses his kids. But I think the difference is where they do it.

Justin is only present in U. Nothing is real therefore he has the freedom to do whatever he wants. He attacks the ai mermaids cuz they're not real. He threatens Belle with his dox gun (which is still bad) but he doesn't actually hurt her. It's lik playing a video game, killing npcs or killing players. Or harassing someone online cuz you don't know them nor do they know you. Kei's dad literally beats his kids. I'm not saying that Justin isn't capable of physically hurting someone but there is a difference between harassing someone online and hurting someone in reality. Both are bad but they're different. Justin also hesitates when Belle tells him to dox her. He threatens Belle with his dox gun, but when Belle tells him to, he says she wouldn't want that. It's weird for his character to be concerned about doxing people when he's been harassing people with his dox gun.

A theory I see that makes Justin's and Kei's dad the same person is having something that dons their wrist. Kei's dad has a wristwatch while Justin has the dox gun. They both speak about order, but just because they share similar traits doesn't mean they're the same. I think that the similarities of the wristwatch and the dox gun is to show that whoever wears them is an authority figure. They carry similar ideas cuz that's what they believe in and that plays into the role they have in their world. Justin is an abusive leader of an policing group in U while Kei's dad is an abusive father of his family. Also they're just people who have similar beliefs.

So yeah. I don't think Justin and Kei's dad are the same people. They are similar but they're not the same. They act and speak differently even tho Kei's dad doesn't have a lot of screentime as Justin to fully know. Justin being Kei's dad is a bit absurd. The movie doesn't really state or make it clear so it can be true. Just by the movie, we don't know.

Maybe my bias for Justin has blinded me from seeing him as Kei's dad but they're just so different that I don't believe it. This is really coming from my knowledge of the movie so maybe I've left out details that are important. Anyways thanks for reading this ridiculous rant or whatever this was. Gosh I write more about Belle than I do with my hw assignments. Yeesh.

[susiephone]

@imdefnotvanessa thank you for giving me indirect permission to talk more <3

Fred: He has never been in trouble before in his life, he's every teacher's favorite and an all-around Very Nice Boy. He got detention for fighting and everyone is SHOCKED... until they find out that Fred was trying to stand up for a younger student who was getting bullied. Fred wanted to resolve things with words, things escalated, and Fred punched the bully in the face... and broke his own hand doing so. He instantly started apologizing and confessed the minute a teacher turned up to ask what was happening. He then started crying. Everyone who hears the full story is like, "Yeah, that makes more sense." Technically he should've gotten suspended for punching someone, but because he's such a nice, well-liked kid and it was a first time offense and he WAS defending someone, he got off with a week's worth of detention and a call home. He's in detention like "oh God I'm a CRIMINAL who has brought SHAME upon my WHOLE FAMILY" and everyone else is like, "First time?"

Shaggy: He's generally good at gym class, he doesn't mind the running or the team building games, but when he found out he'd have to play dodgeball, he said, with all due respect to the coach, he was Not Doing That Shit. He cut a week's worth of gym class and got two weeks' worth of detention in exchange.

Velma: She's pretty much singlehandedly pulling up the school's collective GPA, but cannot resist contradicting her teachers. This can range from "I respectfully disagree with your interpretation of Arthur Miller" to "You realize you are literally teaching us white supremacist rhetoric, right?" The latter tends to land her in trouble. Also has a habit of sneaking banned books into the school library where she volunteers, but no one can prove it's her and even if they could, no one's sure how to go about punishing someone for GIVING the school stuff. The librarian really likes her but can't do much to protect her from the less progressive members of the faculty.

Daphne: Her family's incredibly influential in politics and donates a lot to the school, so Daphne can usually skate consequences for texting in class, skipping class, showing up late, and turning in her work late. She's very friendly and charming but a lousy student. However, there's one very persistent first-year teacher who recognizes how smart she is and thinks someone needs to push her to actually do something with her intelligence and skills. This teacher is the one who likes Daphne best, but is also the hardest on her and the only one to give her detention, her parents be dammed. Daphne respects them for it and is usually willing to take it in stride, even as her mom threatens to make a stink about it.

Other ideas for this concept:

None of the kids like to say they "own" Scooby as he's obviously his own person, but legally he's Shaggy's dog and lives with him. (Fred lives in an apartment that doesn't allow dogs, Velma's mom is allergic, and Daphne's parents would never let an animal in their house.) However, they all share responsibility for taking care of him; Daphne paid for his license and registration, Fred comes over to walk him a couple times a week, and Velma brings him food from her place sometimes.

The fact that Scooby can talk is the world's worst kept secret. The kids TRY to keep it under wraps for his safety but it's not going well.

The kids gradually come to accept that something supernatural is going on, in this order: Shaggy, Daphne, Fred, and then finally Velma, who is still not convinced Scoob isn't an alien.

Daphne's father is a local politician now running for governor and it sucks, she's actively praying he'll lose. Her mom is a very successful lobbyist and spends a lot of time in DC. Daphne barely tells them anything about her personal life.

Fred's family is working class, his mom teaches at the school and his dad is a mechanic at a local garage. Fred works there too on weekends. His parents are super sweet and supportive.

Shaggy's parents are super chill, one of his moms is a mildly successful author who waits tables during the day, his other mom works as a dentist and is always on his case about flossing.

Velma's parents are both college professors, her mom is a lauded physicist and her dad's a historian currently on sabbatical to write a book. They love that Velma wants to follow them into academia but also encourage her to make friends.

The Mystery Machine is this ANCIENT RV Fred's uncle gave him for his birthday, Fred has been fixing it for ages and ages and it's finally in working condition again.

Daphne has a credit card but her parents can see everything she buys so the gang treats it as an "emergencies only" thing because Mr. and Mrs. Blake would NOT approve of her solving mysteries.

Only villains call Shaggy "Norville."

(Villains, and Fred's grandma.)

a scooby-doo origin story where Daphne, Fred, Velma, and Shaggy are all serving detention together and none of them (save for maybe Fred and Daphne) have ever really talked before, but they talk in detention. they have fun, they're bonding, it's a real Breakfast Club situation, and as detention ends they're walking home and they see a dog digging through the garbage of a local restaurant

he's big, but he seems sweet and he's obviously hungry, so the gang approaches him to see if he has a collar. Shaggy manages to get to him first, and the dog immediately takes to him, giving him a big dog kiss and cuddling up to him, but the dog seems to like all of them

upon finding he doesn't have a collar, Shaggy, scratching behind his ears, rhetorically asks, "What's your name, buddy?"

and the dog answers, "Scooby-Dooby-Doo!"

after a minute of freaking the FUCK out and asking each other "y'all heard that, right?" the kids decide to take the dog (who they immediately start calling Scooby-Doo, Scoob, or Scooby for short) home, and find that not only can the dog talk, he displays human-level intelligence and is easily frightened. when they ask where he came from, he doesn't seem to know, but when they walk past an old, abandoned shopping complex on the edge of town, he completely freaks out...and there are weird noises coming from that complex at night....and some suspicious sightings....

the first mystery they investigate together is the mystery of what in God's name is going on here

[girlmetalsonic]

this is probably the bitchiest and most nitpickey thing i will ever post but

(art is from the idw issue 27 B cover, very good art please check it out and other stuff by jonathan gray, all of his work is VERY cool looking. my extreme focus on a minor detail should not reflect badly on the art lol)

i disagree on a fundamental level with almost every single leaderboard placement in this image.

the rest of this is under the cut bc im going to ramble for so long here. also, i need to put a disclaimer im not actually that mad i just dont think the placements make sense.

im aware that this is the "i dont like that sonics arms are blue, i hate sonics new shoes" kind of crazed sonic fan ramblings. but i do not care. this is like a he would not fucking say that situation to me. except its a they would not fucking place that if they all played video games situation.

SHADOW. DOES NOT KNOW WHAT A VIDEO GAME IS. YOU CANNOT LOOK ME IN THE EYE AND TELL ME SOMEBODY FROM THE 50S WOULD GET THIRD PLACE.

ROUGE, (not pictured,) IS LITERALLY CHEATING. SHE IS CHEATING! SHES USING CHEAT CODES!! SHE GETS SEVENTH?? WHILE CHEATING???

KNUCKLES. IS 1. WEARING BOXING GLOVES. AND 2. ALSO HAS LIKELY NEVER PLAYED A VIDEO GAME! HE GREW UP ON A REMOTE ISLAND! THEY DID NOT BRING HIM FORTNITE! you can make the argument that he has since played video games after becoming friends with sonic. but fifth place? he played his first video game at age 16 and youre telling me he beat amy? and tangle? and rouge who, im still not over this, IS CHEATING??

but i digress. im going to give my own ideal placements and reasoning for all of them.

Big

Tails

Rouge

Tangle

Sonic

Amy

Cream

Shadow

Knuckles

Jet

OK; my reasoning for each of these is as follows.

Big is funny and it would be funny if he beat everybody else, its unexpected. its a good joke.

Tails is tech-savvy, i wouldnt be surprised if he knew a few glitches and some speedrun tech. he also likely has good control and experience with playing.

Rouge is literally cheating. the only reason she isnt first is because i think she doesnt play video games that often so she is at a disadvantage on pure technical skill, and also she is sitting upside down (not pictured)

Tangle just seems like a gamer to me. She is a normal person who plays video games in her free time and so she knows how to play fairly well.

Sonic, by all means, SHOULD be in sixth, however i cannot in my mind separate sonic from being a gamer. i know he likely barely plays because he spends his time outdoors and travelling, but sonic being in sixth is so viscerally wrong to me that i had to put him in fifth. its the highest i could justify.

Amy, by all means, SHOULD be in fifth, however, in the image she is raging (not pictured) so i feel that she would be playing worse than usual. shes a normal person who i can see playing video games sometimes.

Cream is a normal kid who i think plays video games fairly often. her mom probably has screen time limits or something but cream is playing minecraft when she can. she is only this low because she is six years old. gemerl is giving her strategy tips. she would be much higher if she had fully developed fine motor skills.

Shadow and Knuckles i can really see being flipped, however, i just see Shadow being a teensy bit higher. While i think shadow knows less about video games, i think he would do better while playing since he has perfect reflexes and also isnt wearing boxing gloves. but i must stress both he and Knuckles are dogshit at video games.

Knuckles could be swapped with Shadow, but, despite knowing more and having possibly played a game or two before, Knuckles is wearing boxing gloves which are bad for gaming, and despite having warrior reflexes due to his training, he really cant beat the ultimate lifeform reflex kind of junk. but again, it could go either way, they both suck at video games.

Jet loses because its funny if he loses. same thing as Bigs. good joke, 10/10 i have no notes.

and thats it. that is my ideal ranking. it will forever slightly piss me off that the official sonic the hedgehog "which characters are gamers" lore does not fit with my interpretations of them. but what can you do.

(make an overly long text post about it, thats what!)