#i noticed a few typos - more than normal - and there were a lot of extremely confusing sentences that i felt an editor should have caught

[overelegantstranger]

been reading a run of horror/thriller novels lately. i've specifically been looking for ones that aren't too intense, ones that are a bit generic or not intended to be especially earthshattering. and i've been largely enjoying it, but, for anyone else who also enjoys reading horror/supernaturaly thrillers, i just wanna stake a quick red flag over J. H. Markert's The Nightmare Man. Not gonna say "don't read". however. AM going to say two things: thought it was a first novel until i saw the six other titles at the back; was astonished at the amount of gratuitous ableism throughout. Also felt it was a bit racist and sexist but not in an overt way, in a nagging uncomfy way.

[boognish-worshipper]

Midnight City AU

this is an au where the main characters are all young adults!! (or millennials ig? they’re in their 20s basically) i gave a rundown of what’s what on a diff post,, i’m also splitting it up into diff chapters,, so this is gonna take a looooong time to finish. i’m posting this before i nitpick my writing to the max

it’s basically a lot of references to that point in time, artists, pop culture etc. all the chapters are named after songs from that era (including the name of this au bc i love midnight city and what better way to describe LS ‼️), and the lyrics r usually connected to what the chapter’s about, or about a character dynamic :D i hope this isn’t too cheesy, or sounds off ig. any typos in this were probably over looked bc i constantly reread my writing and rearrange stuff and make sure it sounds good 🥳 hope y’all enjoy !!! i’m also including a tag to find the chapters under :)

//Chapter 1: Crimewave

Trevor would never, ever admit it, but he had fallen into the category known as “post-hipster”. This was a strange era that began culminating, taking LS by storm. Whether he liked it or not, he could never avoid it. Even if he swore up and down he wasn’t like them, it was practically a paradox. Saying he wasn’t like them just made him a branched off version of the thing he denounced. Each aesthetic that was churned out as the 2010s rolled in were tied to a style, a sound, and Trevor couldn’t care less. It’s not like people liked what he liked. He didn’t belong to anything in particular, but that didn’t mean he wasn’t like them. If anything, he just became another obscure genre in the mix.

One of his favorite music groups was a Canadian duo called Crystal Castles. He enjoyed a good number of their songs, developing an interest for electropunk and pop punk. There was something unique about the sound, and it made Trevor feel special, like he discovered some sort of hidden treasure. He was into pop punk groups like Paramore too, but it was something about them that was just different. People knew Paramore. He often lingered around Sterling Lake, where other post-irony hipsters and classic hipsters resided, careful not to fully associate with them. After all, he apparently despised them, even though he participated in their strange… “culture”. If you could even call it that. From time to time he would find himself discussing his favorite artists with whatever semi-normal person was there, making a couple friends himself who weren’t the snooty kind he’d grown used to.

They all loved talking about how exceptional their taste in music was, a wide variety of people hanging around with their own cliques. Some liked Fall Out Boy, while others liked Blink-182, and then there were the weirdos who liked groups like Radiohead. Most of those guys were whiny, proclaiming how misunderstood they were. He knew maybe one Radiohead song at most (he definitely, definitely never cried to “Creep” and even if he did, so what) but never found himself willingly getting into their music. Then you had the nosedivr crowd, which consisted of mostly girls, and the occasional hipster guy that defected. Their taste was.. alright. Consisted of artists like Lana Del Ray and Marina and the Diamonds, who were their idols. He found almost everyone there besides the few friends he made kind of edgy, and not in the cool way. But he figured all hipsters and guys like them were kind of uncool. Don’t even get him started on those other indie rock types. God. He still came back as often as he could though, establishing some kind of routine. Most people there avoided him anyway, which he preferred. He had enough troubles with them in the past. There was one day he grew tired of the people gawking at him, and he launched a hipster right into the lake. So yeah, nobody within their right mind so much as looked in his direction. That was just how he rolled.

Today, he sat on a nearby bench in Sterling Lake’s park, watching some ducks float on water. His usual friends had been there too, seeing his clowncore buddy Wade with his cousin Floyd. Wade was extremely different than the pretentious fucks around them. He had a shit ton of piercings, and ICP was his favorite music group. Floyd on the other hand, fit right in. Almost too much, like it was something he was forced to do. But he did genuinely enjoy Weezer, of all things you could enjoy. Wade started waving at Trevor, while Floyd hid behind him. All he did was awkwardly wave back, turning his attention back to the lake. He liked Wade, but the clown stuff he wore sometimes spooked him. He didn’t pay much mind to his relative. Looking back across the water, he saw someone new, observing the area. Some dude a little above the average height, hands in his pockets walking around. He seemed a bit lost, and Trevor figured he should help if he was. After all, what was this guy doing here? New people didn’t show up often.

“Hey bud, you lost or something?”

“Oh uh, nah not really. I’m just looking for this girl I met a while ago, said she hangs out around here?”

“What she look like? I’m here pretty often.”

“Uhh kinda short, dark brownish hair? Wears fishnet stockings, high waisted shorts or whatever those grunge people are into.”

“Let me guess, she into the Neighborhood?”

“How’d you know?”

“Yeah, that’s Amanda, she’s a bit of a regular. Not too fond of me I must say.”

“How come?”

“She’s just petty towards me.” He said with a shrug. He didn’t feel like relaying his encounters with her if the guy was dating her or something.

“Oh… well d’ya think you could help me find her? I don’t really know anybody else here. I could actually use the help, since you know her.”

“Eh sure, why not.”

It’s not like he had anything better to do. The two began to walk around the park, gravel and dirt crunching beneath their feet.

“So.. what’s this place about?” The strange guy asked.

“Hm? Oh, it’s just one of those places the hipster folks meet up I guess. Don’t understand it much myself, nor do I really like them.”

“Then why do you come here?”

“Dunno. It’s relatively peaceful, those freaks keep to themselves.”

The man, who was only a smidge shorter than Trevor, glared up at him.

“Hey man, don’t call my girl a freak.”

“Ehh I don’t really count her in with the generic skinny jean wearing hipsters. More of a.. what is it called.. nosedivr type. Whatever that stupid website’s called. Why do you think she dresses like that?”

“Huh.. Never really thought to ask her.”

As he thought about the stuff Amanda wore, he took note of how the man next to him was dressed. He sported an olive jacket with a black turtle neck, and a plain pair of jeans. He wore beat up black converse to top it off, and a pair of Rimmers sunglasses sat upon his head. He looked simple, yet distinguished with the way he presented himself, hair neatly combed back. He figured the two would look nice standing next to one another. They would’ve made an attractive couple, if they weren’t dating already, the kind that turns heads. Trevor wasn’t like them. He wore a black beanie over his mullet, and his favorite pair of red Dix sunglasses rested on the bridge of his nose. The rest of his fit looked disheveled. He had thrown on a wrinkled top, solid black with little surf boards and cars along the bottom- he was a sucker for Hawaiian shirts. His pants were tan colored but had some bleach stains, with old combat boots on his feet.

“Yeah, we may not like each other but I don’t really consider her a freak like those guys.”

He jutted a thumb in the direction of a circle of guys huddled around a phone. The man holding the phone had strawberry blonde hair and a clean outfit on. An expensive looking outfit.

“Who are they?”

“The people here I absolutely cannot fucking stand. The genuine hipsters.”

“Oh.. and you’re..?”

“I’m my own kind. I’m not like these losers, all uppity and shit.”

“Right. Gotcha.”

They walked around a bit more before finding the group Amanda was with. She sat on a bench, chatting with a few girls who dressed similarly to her. All of them had black incorporated into their style. She herself had a black jumper on, tucked neatly into the front of her jean shorts. Just like the guy described, she had fishnets on under them, skater shoes to match. Loose braids fell on her shoulders, and a small black choker was wrapped around her neck.

“Oh, there he is now! Babe! Over here!”

She narrowed her eyes upon seeing Trevor standing next to him.

“Hello, Trevor.” She huffed.

“Relax, I was helping your boyfriend or whatever look for you.”

Her face softened slightly, but still kept a small glare in his direction. She pressed her lips together tight before replying.

“Thanks, I guess.”

“Yup.”

The man turned to face Trevor, sticking out a hand.

“Hey, thanks for showing me around. Trevor, is it?”

“Don’t wear it out.”

He shook his hand, noticing how soft it was. It was in stark contrast to his own, which was rough and calloused.

“Name’s Michael. I’ll see you around most likely? Thanks again.”

“Yeah, no problem.”

Amanda huffed again, nudging Michael’s shoulder.

“Let’s go hun, Bean Machine closes soon!”

“I’m comin’ I’m comin’!”

The two sauntered off, hand in hand. Trevor stood dumbly, watching them walk away. He was right. They did look good together. He wondered if he would actually see this Michael again, kicking a rock. He went back to the bench he originally sat at, putting his earbuds in, listening to some Crystal Castles again to pass the time. The beat thumped in his ears, and all he could think was how much better this shit was compared to that club music shit that played on every radio station in a 5 foot radius. He sat there, scrolling through his own secret nosedivr account, reblogging some photo of a lit cigarette. Right before a hand touched his shoulder causing him to jump.

“What the fuck- Oh. Ron.”

Ron was another friend of Trevor’s, a guy he had met outside one of the iFruit stores talking about how “they’re tapping the phones they sell in there!” and all that conspiracy nonsense. He was a paranoid guy, but Trevor kind of liked that about him. Those were the kind of freaks he liked. He was shorter than Trevor, sort of frail in stature. He wore a bright red windbreaker over a faded tourist tee that read “I went to Liberty City and all I got was this lousy t-shirt!”, along with khaki colored cargo shorts. It didn’t help that he wore some goofy looking bucket hat, and socks with sandals. He dressed like someone’s middle aged father.

“Trevor! Have you seen Wade around anywhere?”

“Last I checked, he was with Floyd.”

“Did he say where he was going?”

“Uh no, but my best bet is they went to that vinyl shop Floyd’s girlfriend works at.”

“Will ya come with me to find him?”

“Now why the fuck would I do that? What do you need him for?”

“Well I- I uh- um..”

“I uh! I uh! Spit it out Ron!”

“It’s about the Merryweather Night Club.”

Merryweather was a big organization that had a wide range of private clubs all over the country, and complimentary body guards to suit. They were all expensive as fuck, and anywhere they settled jacked up the prices of everything else. A lot of neighborhoods became gentrified as a result, and people actually considered it a good thing. What a fucking joke. Trevor of course couldn’t stand it. He hated bullies, and Merryweather was no exception. He’d been wanting to dismantle the club since they settled in LS, seeing as they only amplified the fake feel of the city. Let’s just say he’s gotten into more than a few scuffles with the club. And let’s just say it ended with someone getting stabbed as a result. The guy had it coming to him anyway. Between bouncers and the clubbers, they didn’t like Trevor or his kind loitering around the joint. It didn’t stop him from plotting some sort of revenge though. Ron per usual was on board, his reason being Merryweather’s violent history that had been swept under the rug. They were rather forceful relocating people who had lived in certain neighborhoods for years, Ron being one of their victims. Wade only decided to tag along because he wanted to be included.

“Ah fuck, what’d those bastards do now?”

“They’re throwing some big party!”

“…What fucking for?”

“All I know some guy’s coming to visit, somebody they labeled important and he’s-“

“Woah woah woah wait, Ron. Who?”

“Steve Haines.” He breathed out, careful not to be overheard.

Trevor’s eyes widened, his gaze shooting over to the posse he had poked fun of before. Steve was talking to the group, all of them doing that fake laugh they always did. God, even their humor was pretentious.

“Those fucking hipsters!” He hissed.

“I abhor them, you know that-“

“I know. I know. But, that Weston guy’s gonna be there with him-“

“Weston? Devin Weston?”

If Trevor hated hipsters, then he utterly loathed rich daddy’s money boys like Devin Weston. He had only gotten that stupid fucking night club because his father paid Don Percival enough money to let Devin do whatever he pleased with the Merryweather body guards. It was an elitist club, and they only allowed the best of the best in there.

“What the fuck’s going on there?”

“Something to do with those guys he hangs out with. I think they’re doing something major, expansion maybe-”

“And him and Devin are working together or..?”

“I don’t know. I didn’t hear much after that, that’s why I wanted to grab you and Wade and-”

“Then let’s fucking go get him, Ron!”

The two rushed out of there, heading for the vinyl store to look for Wade. Trevor knew a shit storm was coming, and he absolutely couldn’t wait.

//the next chapter’s gonna be longer i promise lolz

[erimentary]

About a Certain Duke's Daughter (Part 2)

Translation of ある公爵令嬢について from the Hamefura Web Novel Read Part 1 here

T/N: I am using the spelling used in the Light Novels, but I would probably make an exception for Fray, if/when she appears. I'll use Randall as her last name if ever (it was Landoor in the LNs, iirc). :) Holy, moly. This part is a little longer than the previous one and took me more time to translate than I thought it would. My apologies for any typos or grammatical mistakes--I haven't given it another read through so this is as raw as it gets. xD Anyway, please enjoy, and my messages are open if you notice any translation/grammatical mistakes, or just want to talk about HameFura.

And so, a few years after I started being able to use magic, I enrolled at the Academy of Magic.

And while I entered the academy shouldering the excessive expectations of the Tucker household, I arrived only to learn that my magic was actually quite weak.

No, rather than learning about it for the first time, I already noticed it before.

The Tucker house was situated far in the countryside, and while it is a Baron household, it was quite a low-ranking house. There was no one with magical powers nearby.

Even so, from the way my magical powers activated at a later age and from what was written in books about magic, I already knew that my magic was quite weak.

However, actually entering the Academy of Magic and seeing the magical powers of the sons and daughters of other nobles, I realized once again that it was quite impertinent to even call my own magical power as magic.

I was already reluctant to go back to the Tucker household before, and now, after this realization, I became even more reluctant to go back to the estate.

Baron Tucker was so over the moon at having a magic-user in the family for the first time that he said he’ll have someone’s son marry into the family and make me the heiress but.. Honestly, from the perspective of a high-ranking house with several magic-wielding members, a concubine’s daughter with such negligible magical powers would just be laughed at scornfully.

The Tucker family, a low-ranking baron household, was, so to speak, a family of naive country bumpkins.

I am grateful to them of course, for providing for me thus far, and I was thinking about paying them back the cost of taking care of me once I start working.

However, not once had I ever thought of wanting to stay in the Tucker house.

It was not like I hated it there, but I didn’t feel at home either.

So I looked for a way to avoid going back home.

A way for the baron family to acknowledge me without me having to go back… And I found it.

That is, to work at the Magical Ministry. It is the most prominent organization in the country and admired by many.

If I am employed there, the Tuckers will be overjoyed, and they will never ask me to quit and go home.

It is said that while the Magical Ministry employs a lot of powerful magic-users, even those with almost no magical powers but have excellent grades could be employed as researchers.

And since I have insignificant magical powers, I have no choice but to aim for that.

Fortunately for me—someone who had been continuously praised for being a remarkable student by my teachers since I was but a child—I was able to remain an excellent student even after entering the Academy of Magic.

I was able to get the top ranking at the academic tests that took place soon after entering the academy. As a result, while I have very little magical capabilities, I was selected to become a member of the much-admired student council.

The student council of the Academy of Magic was a target of admiration of the whole student body.

After the Tucker household was notified that I became a member of the council, I received an all too thick letter from them expressing their joy. I was also commended by my teachers.

To a daughter of a countryside baron, this was such a great honor.

However, this also led to a lot of jealousy.

In the first place, most magic wielders are nobles, and the higher you go up the nobility rank, the greater the number of wielders.

Therefore, the majority of the students at the Academy of Magic are those of higher peerage.

This trend is especially apparent these days. Within the second years, students even include those of royal status and sons and daughters of dukes—people you ordinarily wouldn’t get the chance to meet if you live your life normally.

Under these circumstances, I could understand why the other students would not find it amusing if the daughter of a countryside baron had been selected to be a part of the widely-admired student council.

The jealousy is particularly strong this year, as the student council, starting with the royal twins, included a lot of seniors that are strongly adored by their juniors.

As far as social statuses go, among the second years, there is a commoner who wields magic—something the Academy had not seen in a while—named Maria Campbell, but… she is a wielder of light magic; aside from the fact that light magic users are extremely rare, her magical power is also regarded as top class.

In contrast to that, I am but the daughter of a countryside baron, not much different to a commoner in terms of status, wielding the not uncommon wind magic—and it’s fairly weak too. My only saving grace is my academic capabilities…….

It would probably go better for me if I had a more amiable personality, but... if you’d allow me to say so myself, I am quite twisted. I can’t even begin to spell amiable.

In other words, on top of the extreme jealousy, students in the academy despised me for being “a haughty and disagreeable girl despite her weak magic and low station”.

To be honest, though being in this situation feels terrible, there is nothing that I can do.

Ever since before, no one in the Tucker household really liked me, and even in the school I used to attend, people talked behind my back, and I was subjected to petty harassment.

To that end, the situation hasn’t really changed, just that the harassment has become a little more intense.

In other words, I should just do my best for two years, get excellent grades and get a job at the Magical Ministry.

I just have to continue to work hard on my own, as I always had. That was what I decided in my heart a few weeks after entering the Academy of Magic. That was what I intended but…..

“Hey, Ginger, you should try these sweets too. They’re very good!*

“No, thank you. I’m still working.”

“Really? I’ll just leave them here for you then~”

Saying this, she grinned and left the sweets beautifully wrapped in paper on top of the desk.

She had never responded to me in an unpleasant way even with my curt way of replying, something that is often frowned upon by others. If anything, no matter how cold I respond, she continues to approach me with a friendly smile. I can’t help but find it strange.

A few months have passed since my enrollment at the Academy of Magic and becoming a member of the student council.

Thanks to that, I’ve gotten quite used to my work here, but... There were some unexpected happenings as well.

To begin with, ever since I started being envied and harassed by the people around me after entering the academy and being selected as a member of the student council, I had intended to do my best on my own.

After all, I thought no one would involve themselves with me with any intention other than bullying.

And yet..… Most of the other first years who were also selected for the student council both had high pride and status, and I can feel their uneasiness around me, but…… All the second-year members are friendly and amicable, seemingly unbothered by social ranks.

Even the members of the royal family, Prince Jeord and Prince Alan, do not look down on me, and treat me as an equal.

And among those people, the one who is especially friendly is

———Katarina Claes, a duke’s daughter.

The only daughter of Duke Claes and Prince Jeord’s fiancée.

She, who stands on top of the social hierarchy, goes in and out of the student council every day, having completely integrated herself with the other student council members despite not being an actual member herself.

At the very strong request of the other second-year members, she was allowed to enter the student council room—

A place that is off-limits to the general student populace.

Lady Katarina is called “The Benevolent Saint” within the school. When I just joined the student council, I was also a little surprised by her kind and amiable smile.

However, after a little while, I realized.

Katarina Claes is————simply a dumb weirdo…...

[buttonso]

Teamwork: An Aura/Harvey short

AKA: Buttonso Very Unsubtly Projects FEELINGS Onto Poor Aura.

I am going to put this below a cut both for length and because the whole thing concerns fears/anxieties around pregnancy. If you like it and want to reblog it, you may, but I will not tolerate any form of judgmental commentary. I'm prepared to block people if needs be.

2,685 words. Contains a few swears. Forgive any typos ^^*

So. Ok. Well. A few weeks ago, I learned that I was pregnant. I did not think it was in the cards for me, for various reasons, so it's been a surprise, and while it's a good surprise, I have found it to be more than a little overwhelming. My husband has been amazing and has been doing a good job of keeping me off the ledge, and this whole thing is based on one of the many pep talks he's given me in the last few weeks.

This clearly would take place after Breathe With Me is over. It may or may not be considered canon, as I could end up contradicting it in the future sequel of Breathe With Me...... which may be a long time coming now that my life is changing.

Maybe this is TMI, and if I've made anyone uncomfortable, I do apologize.

*

Teamwork

Harvey whistled under his breath, a cheery tune befitting the sunny day and his sunnier disposition. No matter how busy he got at the clinic, nothing had been able to dampen his spirits for long over the past several weeks. It was a lovely spring and promised to be an even lovelier summer. His home and his wife were lovelier still… and he was going to be a father. Oh, not for a awhile- Aura was nearing the end of her first trimester, but everything seemed to be going well so far.

It seemed that having everything he wanted in life agreed with Harvey.

His last appointment of the day had cancelled on him, and he’d decided to close the clinic early and head home to surprise Aura. He’d stopped by the General Store for a few things, the plan spinning out naturally as he shopped. He would draw a bath for her so she could relax after she came in from the fields while he cooked a nice dinner. He harbored vague, hopeful notions of offering her a massage after dinner, but that would be dependent on her energy levels after- it was entirely possible she would want to go straight to sleep.

Aura, of course, stubbornly insisted on continuing to do all the work she was accustomed to doing, and despite Harvey’s misgivings, he’d yielded to the judgement of her OB, who had said she could continue to work as long as she felt up to it. Well, the doctor was right, and he himself would have said the same thing to a patient, but that didn’t stop Harvey from worrying.

He did not see Aura anywhere near the farmhouse as he stepped up onto the porch, but that was not unusual. She might be in the far fields, or the barn, or the woods… she might well even be inside, working on something in the kitchen. But she always came home at 6:30 for supper, so he would be ready when she arrived. Harvey’s cheery little whistle became a contented hum as he set the groceries down on the kitchen table, then headed towards the bedroom to change clothes, loosening his tie as he walked. The living room and kitchen was empty- even the cat was nowhere in evidence.

The hum died in his throat as he pushed open the bedroom door and he saw her. Aura was lying on the bed, fully dressed on top of the covers, curled on her side. Her back was to him, and her body was shaking with soft, hopeless little sobs. Alarm shot through him- he couldn’t help the automatic, instinctive lunge towards the bed.

“What’s wrong, darling?” He asked, as she jumped, clearly startled, nearly lurching off the bed as she turned to face him, eyes wide as she hastily wiped at her tear-streaked face. Murphy, who’d been hidden from Harvey’s view by Aura’s body, scampered off the bed in alarm, his tubby body hitting the floor with a thud on the opposite side of the bed, claws scrabbling on the floor as he scampered off.

“You nearly gave me a heart attack!!” She exclaimed, one hand pressed to her chest and the other held out towards him, her finger pointing at him in accusation. “What are you doing home so early?!”

“My last appointment was canceled, and I thought I’d surprise you. Please… tell me, what’s going on…” He fought down the panicked, instant assumption of utter disaster, but he’d never seen her like this before. “…Did… did something happen? Are you well?”

“I-I’m fine…physically, anyway.” She sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose before rubbing at her eyes and cheeks again with both hands. “I’m just… having some feelings. Dealing with feelings was never my strong suit and it’s harder than ever these days.”

“What sort of feelings?” Harvey moved cautiously towards the bed, sinking onto it beside her.

“It’s… it’s nothing,” Aura sighed, but she leaned into his touch when he reached out and put a hand on her cheek.

“It’s not nothing, you were in tears.” Anxiety made his voice tight and his tone a bit sharp. She flinched, biting her lip as she avoided his gaze. His hand slid from her cheek to her shoulder. “Sweetheart… please… tell me.” His heart raced and he felt himself trembling a little, despite his need to be brave. “Please,” He repeated, when the silence stretched between them, and he felt her shoulder beginning to tremble again.

“I-I…” she took a deep breath. “I’m… I’m scared, okay?” She blew out a frustrated breath and covered her face with her hands. “I’m… scared and I feel stupid, immature, selfish… I…I hate myself for feeling this way…”

“Why? What are you afraid of?” He slid his arm around her carefully, but she stiffened, rather than relaxing into his embrace as she always did. Dread crept up his spine, and panic made another attempt at clawing its way out.

“…I…I should be happier than I am. About the baby.” Her tone was extremely reluctant, her silver eyes downcast as she continued to avoid his gaze. She put a trembling hand on her stomach as the other hand came to rest on Harvey’s thigh. “But once the excitement of telling you wore off… every day, every week since… I’ve only gotten more and more worried.”

“Oh.” Harvey released the breath he’d been holding in a trembling sigh. “…Is… that all.” She still had a long way to go in her pregnancy… but still, that meant she’d been agonizing for several weeks in silence. It didn’t speak well for his attentiveness as a husband. “I’ve been floating around here like a happy fool, and I never noticed you were in distress…”

“You didn’t notice because I hid it from you,” She sighed. “I…I didn’t want to rain on your parade. And your excitement was definitely contagious at first, but now…”

“…Now?” He made another attempt at sliding his arm around her, and this time she did lean into him, to his relief.

“Everything… is gonna change, Harvey,” she said softly. “Everything. And I… I’m not sure I’m up to the challenge.”

Harvey ran his hand up and down her arm slowly in an attempt to soothe her. “I’m of the firm belief that there’s nothing you can’t handle, my dear.”

“But… don’t you see…” Aura paused as she seemed to try to compose herself, only to have her voice break. “I’m… I’m not good enough, Harvey.”

“Not good enough?” He echoed, biting back the automatic impulse to deny it. “Why do you think that?”

“There’s… there’s no doubt in my mind you’re going to be the best Dad ever. I mean… baby, you practically have nurturer tattooed on your forehead. But me? I’ve spent my entire adult life just doing whatever I wanted to do. I’ve learned how to be considerate of you, and to accommodate you in my life, but… a baby… I don’t… I don’t know how to be in a normal family. I just can’t see any way I’m not going to totally fuck this all up.”

“Sweetheart…” He tightened his embrace and pressed a kiss to her temple. “It’s perfectly natural to have concerns about impending parenthood… I know I’ve been all smiles since you told me you were pregnant, but I’ve been worried too… I grew up without a father, so I have no example to look back on. But we’ll learn together. We have friends with experience to draw upon, and we’ll be just fine. All three of us.”

“No, no it’s not… not just that…” Aura shook her head and gestured with one hand, as if she were shaping a lump of dough while she worked through her thoughts. “It’s not just worrying about doing a good job… even though I am… but I…” Her hand tightened into a fist, and she squeezed her eyes shut. “All this worrying I’ve been doing… I’m thinking about myself. How my freedom is going to be curtailed. How my relationship with you may be affected, may even suffer. How… how much I am not enjoying feeling the changes in my body.” Her cheeks reddened as her voice wobbled. “I hate feeling low-key sick all the time… my clothes are getting uncomfortably tight… my breasts feel too big, I’m not sleeping well... I mean, do you hear this? It’s all me, me, me, I, I, I… what kind of fucking self-centered monster am I? Instead of worrying about whether or not my baby is healthy I’m only thinking about how uncomfortable I am and how scared I am of all this change.” Her voice broke at last, and she began to sob again.

“Oh… my darling…” Harvey had never seen her in such a state, and he wasn’t quite sure how to react for a moment, but hugging her seemed like a safe bet, and he used both arms to do so, pulling her against his chest. “I wish you’d told me sooner…” He was no obstetrician, but Aura’s doctor was a friend of his, and he’d read quite a lot on the subject of pregnancy ever since they agreed to try for a baby. This felt like mere reassurance wouldn’t be enough. “You know… I meant it, earlier, when I said there’s nothing you can’t handle,” He said after a few moments of simply holding her.

“I know you think so, but…” She sniffed and he shook his head.

“No but.” He put just enough sternness into his voice that she blinked at looked questioningly at him.

“When you first came here… I was so in awe of how confident you were. You came here all by yourself and resurrected your grandfather’s dying farm. You ventured into those dreadful mines and fought monsters… and you told me once that you were not going to stop taking risks if you had a shot at something better. I remind you of all this not to dismiss your concerns… but to tell you that I have every confidence in you,” Harvey told her, doing his best to be calm. He hated seeing her this way, but he knew he needed to be the strong one now, even if that was normally her role.

“How can you not be… disgusted by what I just told you?” She asked damply, sniffing again, and wiping her face inelegantly with the back of her hand, blinking several times to clear the tears from her eyes.

Harvey fished a handkerchief from his pocket and offered it to her. “Because you’re my favorite person in the world, and I love you so very much.” He smiled, feeling a bit shy and awkward. “I think you should talk to some of the other mothers in town… or if you aren’t comfortable with that, find a support group online. You cannot possibly be the only woman to feel this way. I of course cannot know what it feels like to be pregnant, but… it is not surprising at all that the physical changes may be disturbing. I’m no obstetrician but I have treated pregnant women before.”

“…I… thought about reaching out to Doctor Delecroix… I hadn’t talked to her in a while, but she always makes time for me if I need it…” Aura admitted, hesitantly. Aura’s therapist was a big believer in the power of the internet and was more than willing to have video chats with patients if they couldn’t make it to her office in Zuzu City, even a patient she was no longer seeing regularly, such as Aura.

“If you think it will help, then you should.” She’d stopped trembling, at least. “You’re not doing this alone,” Harvey added. “It will be a big change, it’s true… but it’s a change we’ll navigate together.”

“Just… just admitting how I’ve been feeling… It does help, a little…” Aura said slowly. “I’m still scared, but…right now, at least… I feel… I feel a little better… I…” She hesitated a moment. “I do want this baby, you know… I just… I didn’t expect to have all these mixed feelings.”

Harvey pressed a kiss to her forehead. “We’re doing this together,” He repeated. He’d say it as often as he had to. “We’re not just a team, we’re a family. No matter what happens. You, me, the little one…” There was a soft thud and a little “mrrrp” as Murphy returned to the bed, making his way to Aura’s lap and purring as Harvey stroked his head. “And him,” Harvey added. “We’d never forget you,” he said with a chuckle as the cat shoved his blocky head up into Harvey’s hand.

“I was so afraid that you’d be hurt if I admitted how I’ve been feeling…that… that was the worst part…” Aura said quietly, rubbing at her cheeks again. “I’m sorry if you were…”

“I was only worried about you,” Harvey said as they took turns petting the cat, who settled into a happy loaf on Aura’s lap, reveling in the attention. “Please don’t ever suffer in silence… our little one has a lot of growing to do yet, and I’ll do whatever I can to keep her mother happy.”

“Her?” Aura chuckled. “We can’t possibly know the sex yet. Besides, I thought all men wanted sons.”

Harvey shrugged. “Whenever I imagine it… I see a girl. Someone who will grow up as strong and beautiful and brave as her mother.” He leaned forward, resting his forehead against hers. “Though I wouldn’t say no to eventually having an assortment.”

She snorted and tilted her head a bit so she could kiss him lightly. “How about we make sure everyone survives this one before we talk about assortments… I’m still not loving the physical side of all this. I’m afraid I may be difficult to live with the next several months…I’ll… I’ll try my best to not be a complete monster.”

“Just be honest with me about your feelings, and I’ll extend you the same courtesy.” It was Harvey’s turn to initiate a kiss, brief and tender though it was.

“I…I should get back out there…” Aura said reluctantly, swinging her legs off the bed. “Got a few things that need doing before the day’s over.”

Harvey wanted to argue, to insist that she stay in and rest, but he didn’t have the heart to try to cage her now. “Go and do whatever you need to do… just be careful, please… and I’ll have a bath and dinner waiting for you when you get back.” He caught her hand as she nudged the cat off her lap and stood up. “And as for whether or not the baby will hurt our relationship… of course I can’t see the future, but… I can’t imagine any outcome apart from loving you more.” Harvey felt his cheeks heating in the familiar old blush that she could manifest in him with little more than a smile.

“I…” Aura gave a brittle little laugh and pulled his knuckles to her lips, giving them a brief kiss. “I don’t deserve you, you know.”

“I’ve told you before that you should let me be the judge of that.” Harvey answered as she quickly wound her hair into a loose braid.

“And you’ll… you’ll tell me if you have things you’re worried about, right? Or if I do or say something to hurt you? You won’t suffer in silence either?” She asked pointedly.

“I promise,” Harvey answered as she headed towards the door. “I love you, Aura.”

She paused at the doorway and blew him a kiss with a weary chuckle. “I love you, too, Harvey. Thank you… for being you. I couldn’t ask for a better partner.”

Harvey smiled as she left the room, listening to her footsteps fade. Murphy shoved his head against Harvey’s arm, and he gave the cat a stroke. “Well, boy… life isn’t simple even when you do have everything you want,” he said to the cat. “But we’ll just have to do our best and look after each other… it’s all anyone can do, I suppose.”

[obxcunt]

Love bites || (4)

pairing: jj maybank x reader [eventually] || rafe cameron x reader [currently]

warnings: cursing, typos.

summary: it was supposed to be a good summer for you, the last one in the obx before going to college, the last one with your friends and family. Unfortunately, a sudden and mysterious death is about to completely change your life, pushing you directly into a brand new world and into a very sexy vampire’s arms.

A/N: thank you so much guys, comments, likes, notes and dms means so much to me i’m glad you are enjoying my story! Love you all.

part three || masterlist || part five

“I can't see you right now, Rafe.” You said, holding the phone. “I— I need to help my mom with something at home.” You lied, glancing at the blond vampire next to you.

“Are you okay?” Rafe asked, concerned by how distant you've been recently. “Is it because of me? Shit, Y/N. I’m sorry if my—”

“Relax, it has nothing to do with you, Rafe.” You cut off, closing your eyes as you sat down on the ground with your guest, head falling back in a sigh. “It's just— It's just complicated for me to be around anyone right now. I need to be alone, but i’ll text you tomorrow, alright?”

He sighed. “Okay, i’ll see you later.”

You both hang up at the same time, guilt still occupying your mind as you threw the phone away. You looked at the horizon, the view from your backyard always calming you down when you need it. The last time you were there: Rafe and you were sharing your first kiss after a party: the heated memory making you smirk. But today you were sitting next to a vampire, discovering a brand new world.

“I don't like lying to people, especially my friends.” You said, breaking the silence, the nature’s noises accompanying your words. “They're also in danger—”

“Trust me, they know way more than you think.” JJ said, looking at the grass, his black-painted fingers wandering through it.

You ignored his sentence, too busy looking at him, examining his normal appearance: tanned skin, muscles, bright blue eyes, nothing seemed different. You weren't expecting vampires to look this good.

“What happened to you?” He briefly glanced at you. “You look so—” You paused shrugging your shoulders. “Human.”

He chuckled. “Remember my birthday party at John B’s, last year?” You hummed, he had invited you for some reason, but you couldn’t make it. “When everyone left, i decided to go home. I don’t know why, but i really wanted to see my dad on my eighteenth birthday.” He paused, a sad smile appearing on his face. “He was really high and drunk, we fought about it.” Your lips parted, guessing his next words. “My dad beat me to death.”

“JJ...” Your voice cracked, tears emerging once again. You couldn’t believe it. Everyone knew his father’s reputation and bad habits, but this was something else. “I— I don’t even know what to say. I’m sorry, you deserved so much better.” The blond boy looked at you, giving you a tiny smile. He wanted to wipe away the sad expression you were wearing. “But, how did you—”

“It happened outside, he left my body there.” He said, sniffing and looking at the rings on his fingers, nervously playing with them. “Marcus found me, he smelled my blood from miles away.” He smirked. “He felt extremely sorry as soon as he saw me, he knew my father and quickly understood. He thought i deserved a second chance. So, he saved me.”

“Who’s Marcus?” You asked. “Wait, are you talking about the old drug dealer?” JJ nodded. “He’s a vampire?” You raised your brows. “Wow... I always thought he was strange.”

“Yeah...” JJ continued. “He turned me, right in time.” Your eyes widened, imagining the scene. “It wasn’t easy, especially the first week. Marcus teached me how to survive, to control myself and everything i needed to know.”

“But...” He looked back at you, smirking at your confused face: you looked adorable. It was both surprising and comforting how easy you were to talk to. You were surprised too, feeling strangely good and safe with him. “What about, Luke? He killed himself, right?” You asked, remembering the event from last year. “Was it because of— Or did you?”

“I didn’t kill him.” He cut off, you nodded a bit reassured. “He killed himself a few hours after killing me. He really left the house, drove to Barry’s and shot himself. The cops didn’t even question it, since he had a poor reputation. They looked for me, obviously. I wasn’t in a good shape, dealing with the whole turning thing. Marcus lied to them, by saying that i was sick and they believed it. I think they just wanted to close the case. I’ve been living at John B’s since then.”

“Right.” You nodded, chin resting on your knees as you held your legs against your chest, trying to memorize everything. “Your friends know about you, don’t they?” He laughed. “Of course they do.” You added, feeling stupid for asking. “And, wasn’t it a bit awkward at first?”

“The hardest part was definitely accepting my death and what happened to me. I disappeared for a few days, ignored their calls and texts before telling them everything. I had to learn how to behave in public first, which wasn’t easy for me. I’m still struggling sometimes.” He explained, sighing. “But, since Kiara is a witch—” You chuckled at the irony, you ignored so much things. “They took it pretty well. Pope asked a lot of questions though, he was a bit nervous around me but mostly intrigued.”

You smirked. “I do have many questions as well!” You said with excitement, sitting down properly. “Like, why aren’t you burning right now?” He chuckled, enjoying your reaction to his condition. “We’ve been outside for hours. Also, how do you feed? Do you have powers?”

He sighed, smiling. “Okay, let’s start with this.” He pointed at the ring on his finger. “See this one? Well, Kie made it for me. It protects me from the sun.” You nodded, looking at it attentively. “I don’t feed on humans, but on animals and sometimes we steal blood-bags from the nearest hospital.” He looked at your neck, licking his lips just to tease you. “But, you look delicious.” You rolled your eyes, smiling. “Let me guess, type O?” He teased again, laughing as you smacked his arm. “My favorite...”

“Fuck off, JJ.” He laughed.

“And, we are not in Twilight. I’m far from Edward Cullen, even though we both share the same strength and speed.” You looked at the intriguing boy. “I won’t read your mind. Unfortunately, it’s not on the list.” You smirked, narrowing your eyes at him. “That’s too bad, i’m sure your thoughts are very interesting.”

“What about—” You sighed. “The other one, the vampire who killed my friend.” JJ hummed. “Do you know him?”

“No, that's the problem.” He replied. “And it seems like he's not alone. We think they are from another state, just passing by.” You looked around the garden, wondering if they were around here. “Don't worry, they won't bother anyone during the day. They're not coming out, which means they probably don't know any witches. They're either old school vampires or newborns, who don't care about consequences. They took so much risk by killing Kelce.”

“The police department knows about it, right? They know it's not an animal.” JJ nodded, chuckling. “I knew something was wrong the other day.”

“Vampires used to be a massive problem around here, in the past.” He explained. “That's when the slayers came around and eradicated them. It's a family thing, only touching the sons.” You frowned, rethinking about your conversation with Ward. “We were safe for a while. We are a small group, not messing around and respecting the rules. But, Kelce’s death changed the game.”

“They called the slayers back and now, they're all looking for vampires to kill.” He nodded. “That's not good…”

“Yeah…” He laughed. “Especially since you're dating one of them.” You frowned, jaw dropping. “Ward Cameron comes from one of the most famous families of slayers of all time. Which means that his wonderful son is going to join them anytime soon.”

“Holy shit.” You said, laughing nervously and running a hand through your hair. “The other day, while we were throwing a party for Kelce at their place, i heard a weird conversation he was having on the phone with someone. He was saying a lot of things, but nothing really made sense to me, until now. He seemed really nervous.” JJ wasn't surprised. “Peterkin was also there, she was supposed to meet him.”

“They're obviously preparing something.”

“I’m not dating him, JJ.” You added, annoyed by his comment. “I don't know why you keep—” He chuckled, interrupting you.

“Alright, Y/N.” He said. “You might not be dating him, officially. However, you were still having sex with him that night.” He smirked at the sight of your heated cheeks. “I saw it, while searching for the other vampire. Unfortunately, it was already too late for Kelce. I still managed to save you though when you walked back to the—”

“Wait!” You snapped. “It was you, behind me?”

“Technically, we were both behind you. He was looking at you and clearly enjoying your fear, he wanted to mess with your head. I chased him away while you were calling 911. He wanted to kill you too.” You remained silent, in shock. “I saved your pretty ass two times already, Y/N.” He joked, the hidden compliment making you blush once again.

“So, you can’t read minds?” You asked, wanting to switch subjects. “Or see the future? I thought vampires had more powers.” JJ smiled, standing up and offering you a hand. “What are you doing?” You asked, accepting it and standing up in front of the blond boy.

“I can't read minds or see the future, but—” You looked at him in the eyes and pouted, his heart melting at the sight. “I can do some other things though...” You raised a brow, curious.

In one second: the blond boy disappeared. You turned around, searching for him everywhere. “JJ?” He screamed your name and you looked up, noticing him sitting down on the roof with a playful smirk on his face. “How did you—” He moved again, making you laugh.

You tried to turn around, feeling his presence behind you. “Don't move.” He murmured close to your ear, both hands resting on your hips. “We can sense your blood from miles away.” He murmured, caressing your forearm: making you shiver against his body. “We can also hear your heartbeat from miles away.” His hand slowly moved up to your shoulder. “Even your moans…” He smirked against your ear: a silent moan escaping your lips.

“Stop it!” You whined, turning around to face him and smack his chest while he laughed at you. “Idiot.” He stopped, calming down. “I’m sorry, for calling you crazy earlier.”

He scoffed. “You’re adorable, but you don’t need to apologize. It was a normal reaction.” You nodded, smirking. “Anyway.” He continued. “I need your help. I'm pretty sure Ward is preparing something.” You crossed your arms. “I need to get access to his office, where he’s hiding shit.”

You frowned. “Wait, what?” You both started walking back to the front porch. “But, you're a vampire, you're way more discreet than me.”

“Probably, it seems like you have clumsy tendencies.” You stopped walking, rolling your eyes. “But it's impossible for me to get access to his office, since i'm not allowed to enter their mansion.”

“What do you mean?” You asked, following him. “Are they putting way too much Holy Water on the door handles or something?”

He laughed, gently pushing you. “That's very funny.” You smiled, taking the few stairs leaning to the porch before sitting down on the bench. “Vampires can't enter houses without getting invited in first.”

“Oh.” You said. “What about Sarah Cameron? Aren't you guys friends? And i’m pretty sure you came to a party at their house last year.”

“Kiara doesn’t want her girlfriend to be involved in this for now. And, this was before my death. I don’t think Ward Cameron the slayer wants me on his property anymore.” He said, sitting down next to you. “But, since you’re close to Rafe—”

“Shut up...” You whined, rubbing your face, your reaction making him laugh. “Wait, is this why you don’t want me to invite you inside my house? So, you can’t get any access?” He nodded, looking at his black combat boots. “Why not? I don’t understand.”

“It’s for your own safety.” You sighed. “I’m not gonna hurt you, it’s not in my intentions but—” He paused, clearing his throat. “Anyway, Ward and Rafe can’t know about this, obviously.”

“I won’t say anything to anyone.” You promised. “But i don’t think Rafe knows about any of this, JJ.” You said, trying to rassure him. “Don’t worry.”

“Not yet.” He sighed. “Ward is gonna have to inform him, at some point. Rafe won’t become an actual slayer until he kills a vampire by himself, that’s a part of their ritual.” He explained, visibly worried. “I don’t want my new family and friends to die. We— We need to take care of those vampires before anyone else dies.”

Shit, you thought. You didn’t want to lie to anyone, especially your family and friends but you had to. You also didn’t want to use Rafe but you couldn’t help feeling bad for JJ, who didn’t deserved to suffer either. He already went through enough shit.

JJ didn’t want to force you, he wouldn’t. But there was something about you, something telling him that he could trust you. You both remained silent for a moment, until you had made up your mind.

“Okay, fine.” You said, making him look back at you with a smirk. “I’ll help you, if you promise to not hurt anyone, especially Rafe.” He opened his mouth, ready to object. “He’s still innocent, we might not need to fight. We could do this before he turns into a slayer, okay? He’s still my friend and—”

“Okay, we won’t do anything to your boyfriend.” He cut off, the nickname making you growl. “Unless he starts attacking us first.”

“Don’t call him my boyfriend, or you’ll have to find someone else.” He rolled his eyes playfully. “Alright, what do you need, JJ?” He smirked, knowing you were both about to jump in a risky and exciting adventure together.

A/N: If you guys have any questions regarding the fic, feel free to ask me, requests are open!

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tag-list: @prejudic3-deactivated20201112 @starkeyrafe @thestorysofargone @ifilwtmfc @callmeimpetuous @katiaw2 @your-local-candle-addict @iccyyyybitch @agirlwholovescoffee @hvrcruxes

[tumblr won’t let me tag some people, comment if you wanna be add]

[septicstories]

Kitten Licks and Kisses

A Kiribaku story where the lads are playing with a kitten!

Katsuki's POV

"ALRIGHT, ALRIGHT! I'M GOIN', YOU FUCKING HAG! GET OFF MY DICK!" I yelled back into the house I started walking to school.

"Stupid fucking hag, always screaming at me," I mumbled, about to put in my earbuds when I heard a soft noise.

I stopped walking, and paused.

"The hell was that?"

I heard it again.

A little mewl, coming from a cardboard box beside a building.

Walking over to the cardboard box, my eyes fell on a small cat.

It was about the size of my hand and was extremely malnourished. The black and white fur was matted and dirty, a few patches of skin visible.

The box had a messy scrawl that just said "Take me"

Putting my hand out to the cat, it looked up at me with these piercing blue eyes, looking terrified of me.

"Not gonna hurt ya, bud," I murmured, lightly moving my hand to it's head and lightly patting it.

A short purr erupted from the cat, making my mouth twitch.

I took my bag off of my shoulder and opened, digging around for a second to find a small bento box.

Opening it, I offered a bit to the cat, who looked as though they hadn't eaten actual food in weeks.

The cat took small shaky steps toward the box as I sent it down.

I pulled out my phone and sent a message to Kirishima.

Gonna be late, fuck face. Just tell Aizawa-sensei I'll be there in a few minutes.

Sure thing bro, you okay?

Fine

I pocketed my phone again as the cat put food in their stomach, mewling every now and again.

I dug around in my bag again, looking for a bottle of water or something, but there was nothing.

"Ah, shit," I murmured.

I looked around for something that would work, when I saw a small mom-and-pop shop.

"Here, keep eating, pal. I'll be right back," I mumbled, standing up and going across the street and into the shop.

It was almost baren, but a handful of people were in the shop.

Looking around for a moment, my eyes fell on a milk carton.

I grabbed it from the freezer and when I went to pay, I also grabbed a small cup with a lid to keep the milk in.

Leaving the store, I crossed the street and saw that the cat had stopped eating.

I closed the box and opened up the carton of milk, pouring milk into my palm.

I tried as hard as I could not to let any of it leak out as I moved my hand toward the cat.

"Drink up, bud," I said, the small cat meowing before dipping it's mouth into my palm.

And when I say mouth, I mean it practically tried to drown itself in the milk.

It lapped at the milk, seeming very content.

The cat didn't look to be a fully grown cat.

Actually, much more of a kitten.

Their fur definitely needed a wash, but even the way it was, it looked gorgeous. There was these splotches of white in their coat and they actual had a huge spiral on their belly.

This kitten must be protected at all fucking costs.

The kitten had finished licking up the milk in my palm, so I dried my hand on my uniform pants, poured the rest of the milk into that cup, shoved a lid on it, and put it in my bag.

Picking up the kitten carefully, I stroked their head and back to make sure they felt calm.

"You wanna come with me?"

The cutest meow came from the cat as they rubbed up against my hand, a small purr coming from them.

"Alright, let's go, bud," I murmured, putting them in my blazer pocket, but making sure they could still breathe.

I started to jog, making sure I wasn't hurting the kitten, and keeping an ear out for meowing or mewling.

I may be late, but I don't wanna miss too many classes.

***

"Bakugou, do you mind explaining to me why you're late?" Aizawa-sensei asked me as I walked into class.

"Something came up," I mumbled, sitting down a lot more carefully than I would normally.

Aizawa-sensei just rolled his eyes before explaining some dumb shit before going into his sleeping bag and napping.

"Yo, Bakugou,"

I looked up at a concerned Kirishima.

"What's up, bro? What came up?"

I opened my mouth to respond when I heard a small meow from my pocket.

Kirishima and I looked at each other before another mewl escaped from my pocket.

"Uh... whatchu got there, Bakugou?"

Another meow.

"Cocaine,"

Kirishima gave me a look and I sighed.

Glancing at Aizawa-sensei to make sure he was asleep, I pulled the small cat out of my pocket.

When Kirishima opened his mouth, I put a finger up to my mouth, telling him to shut the fuck up.

He nodded.

"Dude, how are you gonna keep them quiet during class?"

Fuck.

"I... didn't think of anything yet," I mumbled, lightly stroking the kitten's head as they purred at me. "I just picked them up off the street, and they were malnourished as hell and they were scared of me and I just wanted to make sure they were okay,"

"What're we talking about?" Kaminari asked, coming over.

"Keep this quiet, including yourself," I hissed, the kitten burrowing themselves into the crook of my elbow.

"Holy shit, is that your cat?"

"Not mine. Stray,"

"Kacchan picked up another stray?" I heard that nerd ask.

"Another?"

"He did that a lot when we were kids," Deku said, pointing to the small kitten who seemingly fell asleep in my elbow.

Soon enough, the whole class was crowded around me.

"If you guys say anything, you're fucking dead," I hissed.

"You should take them to Chiyo-san, make sure they're not sick," Ponytail said.

"I can't do that. I'm taking them to the vet afterward anyway, make sure they don't have a disease or a chip. If they have a chip, I'll return them, if not, they're mine,"

"Aww, Bakugou's got a secret soft side!" Pinky cooed, making me scoff and roll my eyes.

"Everyone back to their seats,"

While everyone was shuffling, I quickly but cautiously put the kitten back in my pocket.

Aizawa-sensei got up and left as Midnight-sensei came into the room.

Ah, shit. I have nowhere to put them during hero training. Fuck!

Midnight-sensei kept on talking on about whatever the fuck while I kept petting the kitten's head with my forefinger.

Then it hit me.

Nope, wait, typo.

Then they bit me.

There we go.

Thankfully, their teeth were super dull, not enough to hurt too bad.

It felt like a little pinch.

What hurt was when it stabbed my hand with it's claws.

I pulled my hand out and saw little holes, making it through maybe a quarter of a centimeter of skin.

"Damn, they're a feisty one," I whispered as I saw myself start to bleed a bit.

Whatever.

I put my hands back in my pockets to try to cover up the shape of the kitten, and this time they nuzzled and licked at my hand.

Somewhat like an apology.

I heard it meow oddly loud, and the nerd coughed behind me.

Was that his shitty attempt to cover it up?

"Bakugou!"

I looked up at the board, hoping she didn't notice I was dealing with a small mammal at the moment.

I also realized I wasn't paying attention to shit.

"Are you alright?"

I gave a nod, and she continued.

Holy shit, she almost gave me a heart attack.

Classes continued without very few problems, and then lunch.

Dear fuck, it was lunch.

I let the kitten walk on the table while I poured some of the milk from earlier into the lid.

"Drink up," I murmured as Kirishima sat down beside me.

"Here, I can watch them so you can go grab lunch," Kirishima said, and I nodded.

I stood up to go get lunch, just getting some simple curry before walking back to the table.

And I was met with the best sight ever.

Kirishima had his head on the table, grinning as the small kitten licked and pawed at his nose.

His smile was so big and bright, and as I got closer to the table, the small mewls and giggles were audible.

Holy shit, I love that redheaded dumbass so damn much.

Since that damn incident in Kamino, that dumbass managed to steal my heart, and I can't fucking get it back.

But...

I don't quite think I regret that.

"Oi, fuckface,"

See, can't you tell how much I love this idiot?

"Oh, hey, Bakugou!" Kirishima said, grinning up at me.

"I see you two have grown friendly,"

Kirishima released a sweet laugh and the cat meowed, pawing at Kirishima's now messy hair.

"Did you notice the splotch on their back looks like a skull?" Kirishima asked.

I looked at their back, and sure enough, a skull shaped splotch adorned their back.

"Huh, cool,"

"I think it's really sweet that you decided to pick this li'l guy up," Kirishima said, shoving some pork in his mouth. "I never really expected that from you,"

"Yeah, yeah, fucking whatever," I mumbled before putting a spoonful of curry in my mouth.

"It's super manly... and pretty cute,"

I swallowed harshly before coughing a little bit.

I threw my glance at Kirishima, wide eyes.

"And pretty fucking what?!"

He must've realized what he said, because his face grew bright red.

"P-pretty... uhm... pretty... pretty cool! Yeah! Cool! Coolio!" Kirishima's eyes darted around the cafeteria, giving me these awkward finger guns.

"Really?"

"Yup! Absolutely!"

"And I didn't hear you wrong the first time I heard you when I thought you said 'cute'?"

"No! Nonononono! Not at all!"

"You're nervous,"

"Nervous? Pssh, nope!"

"Really, I think it's kind of cute,"

Am I shooting my shot now?

"Wh-what?"

"Oh, I meant cool,"

"Wait, hold the fucking phone!"

"On hold, Kiri,"

"Did you mean...."

"I meant,"

Kirishima sat there, blinking as he tried working out what I just said.

"You don't... like me... do you?"

"No, not at all. I fucking hate your guts," I said with a deadpan.

"Oh... sorry,"

"I was fucking kidding!"

"What?"

"God, you're fucking dense. I do like you,"

"Not like... like-like, is what I meant,"

"What are you, fucking twelve?"

"Shut up!"

"But yes. I like-like you. Get the picture?"

"Holy shit, wow,"

Kirishima leaned back in his char, looking like the weight of the world was being lifted from his chest.

"You're not kidding?"

"No! Why the fuck would I be?"

"I dunno!"

"Just get over here and kiss me, dork,"

As we both leaned in, we were interrupted with a hiss and a meow.

I looked down at the kitten, who looked grumpy.

"Huh, reminds me of you,"

"Fine, no kiss then,"

"Aw, what?"

Tag list: @king-queenie

[stellar-imagines]

SCENARIO REQUEST: ❝ignorance.❞

[ Fandom: Boku no Hero Academia ] [ Characters: Bakugou Katsuki ]

「Scenario where the reader is close to Bakugou, but someday she heard him speaking with his friends that she's annoying and stuff. Then from that day, she grew apart from him and she's extremely polite with him, Meanwhile she grows really close with Midoriya, then Bakugou realizes how stupid he was.」

BAKUGOU KATSUKI

Honestly, you don't really understand why Bakugou doesn't push you away when you're being clingy with him. You're not his girlfriend or anything but you'd like to say that you're actually close friends. Before moving into the dorms, you both lived in the same neighbourhood and would often go to and from school together. You've heard from Midoriya how Bakugou used to be in high school and honestly, it didn't bother you that much because he was striving to become a hero just like everyone else. Despite the way he treats everyone, he's a hard worker who aims to be number one. There were a lot of people who assumed that you're his girlfriend but with a glare from Bakugou, they instantly shut up.

Bakugou doesn't seem like the person to spill your secrets, you're always comfortable with telling him your personal problems. He never gives you any advice but having someone listen to your problems was enough for you. You'd like to think that Bakugou actually sees you as an equal but he never voices it out so you live in your own delusional state of mind, convinced that the ash blonde thought of you as a friend just like how you see him as your most trusted and closest friend. When you overheard Bakugou telling some of your classmates that you were annoying, you felt your heart drop. Though you shouldn't feel that way because you should expect him to think so.

"She's just annoying and clingy."

Even so, his words hurt more than you thought. Bakugou didn't seem to care if you had heard him or not because when you looked at him, his eyes were hard. There was clear irritation in them. You'd been living in your own delusional fantasies for several months and now here he was, being brutally honest with his feelings. It was clear that he never thought you were his friend. You were just an annoying girl who stuck to him like a glue as if you're his best buddy. The boys, which consisted of Kaminari, Sero and Kirishima, felt guilty for coaxing Bakugou's real feelings towards you.

"You didn't have to say it like that, man." Kirishima said with a frown, glancing between you and Bakugou.

"I-It's fine, Kirishima! He's just being honest." you smiled, despite yourself.

Things changed. Everyone noticed that you were distancing yourself from Bakugou, it was noticeable. So noticeable that a child could notice. You didn't want to give up on your friendship but then again, what are you giving up when it didn't even exist in the first place. In the beginning, you both still walked home together but you were keeping your distance, walking behind him. A small part, scratch that — a large part of you want him to at least acknowledge you as his friend. Then again, friendships don't always work out and friends don't always stay together. You thought about it a lot, fighting the burn in your eyes whenever you thought about Baukgou.

Late at night, you would wonder what you should've done back then. You convinced yourself that you will deal with this. give Bakugou the space he needed and talk about it. However, school and training took up most of your time. The two of you never interacted with one another again. Seeing that Bakugou was faring well without you made you feel like the idiot for clinging onto the past. It felt like some cruel joke to be honest. The two of you grew distant but no one seemed to make a comment about it. You started to get along with other people while avoiding Bakugou as much as you can. When you moved to the dorms, you were ecstatic to be living together with your friends. 

Bakugou was a smart person. He knows the weight of his words and what kind of damage was done when he admitted that you were an annoying person. He kind of expected you to brush it off and approach him again like you normally do but apparently the damage he dealt was larger than he had expected. In the beginning, he didn't really miss your presence at all. But ever since then, you never talked to him like you always did. You used to be very lively, casual and cheerful. You were one of the very few people in his life that calls him by his first name. Bakugou felt like a stranger with how polite you were talking to him.

"You dropped your notebook, Bakugou." you handed the item that you had picked up from the ground. Bakugou didn't say anything and took it from your hands, looking at his notebook before back at you. With a small smile, you excused yourself with a curt bow before joining your friends.

You were both classmates and you were treating him like you were strangers. He was aware of how you both had drifted. There were times where you would join him when he was cooking but not anymore. You should know better than anyone how harsh he can be with his words but that wasn't an excuse to believe that you would brush off his words that easily. Bakugou didn't want to admit that he had done something wrong but seeing you acting like yourself around everyone else made him realize that he had been stupid.

"[First Name], do you need help with the groceries?"

"Thank you so much, Izuku. Just put them by the counter."

Bakugou was aware of how close you've grown with Midoriya. He wasn't that pissed but it make him think of when you were still by his side. You don't often call boys with their first names and now you're on first name basis with Midoriya. It irritated him and at the same time he couldn't help but remember the times you would call him by his first name. The more he observed you, the more wanted you to be by his side again. He felt stupid. He was not a smart person at all, he's just an asshole who acted like a know-it-all and hurt people's feelings, calling it as being honest.

His hands were in his pockets when he headed to the common area to grab a drink. He immediately took note of your presence in the kitchen along with the smell of chocolate You always used to greet him with a bright smile, calling him by his first name and get in his personal bubble. But not anymore, you stood there with a cup of hot chocolate in your hands. There was a small smile on your face but it wasn't the same like the ones you used to flash him. These were ones that you put on to give him a false sense of security, to make him think that you didn't have any hard feelings.

"Bakugou? What are you doing at 12 am?"

Why won't you call him with is first name anymore?

"Nothing, just couldn't sleep." he replied. 

"They say that herbal tea is excellent for calming nerves before bedtime. Anyways, I got to go. Goodnight Bakugou."

It was midnight and Bakugou was never up until this late, it was way past his bed time. You were exhausted yourself but your stomach demanded something sweet and warm at this time of day which led you to making some hot chocolate. Being alone with Bakugou was uncomfortable, especially when you remember what he said to you. You had said all that in a haste, wanting to get way from the ash blonde as fast as possible. All you could do was pray that Bakugou would just let you go with your mug of hot chocolate and leave you alone. You didn't even want to think about what the guy might do.

"Since when did you decide to call me by my last time?" he caught your attention which caused you to stop walking. You shifted uncomfortably. Was he serious? He should know why you decide to call him by his last name. 

"Don't you remember what you said to me last time?" you blinked at him. 

"You called me annoying and clingy."

He knows what he said and he wants to apologize but it wasn't easy for Bakugou Katsuki to apologize. 

"I was an asshole, okay? I shouldn't have called you annoying and clingy."

He hopes that saying this out loud will get you back.

Total: 1407 words  Published: 07.04.2020

Thank you for requesting! ｡٩(ˊᗜˋ)و*｡ Don’t worry about making mistakes! We got a jist of what you wanted, anon! And hope that it meets your expectations. ― author Lou

Thank you for requesting! As much as we like scenarios like this, it’s not easy to execute it. But we hope you liked it, anon! ― author Natsuki

Requests are open! Matchups are closed!

Please do not mind the grammar mistakes and typos.

[max--phillips]

Okay! But imagine number 83 with Maxwell 🥺🥺

Hey! I haven’t forgotten about this ask lmaoooo! Okay, so, I didn’t just take this prompt and run with it, I took this prompt and like......... got in a fuckin rocket and shot myself into deep space with it sldfjkghsfdjg I’m having Feelings(tm) about Maxwell Lord and that’s just how it is. Anywhomstdve here we go

Feel the Same

Pairing: Maxwell Lord x f!reader

Warnings/summary/author’s note hybrid: Okay, so, this fic was an excuse for me to project my own issues with imposter syndrome and anxiety into... something. So, the reader’s father is really a personification of those things for me. That being said, heads up for emotional abuse from a parent. The good things in this fic, though, are friends to idiots to lovers, mutual pining i guess, and just. Soft Maxwell Lord deserves its own warning, frankly. Also I am posting this at 3 in the morning so there are bound to be typos I missed when I proofread this so . sorry lmao

Prompt: “Stay there. I’m coming to get you.”

Words: 5.5k (I told you I didn’t just run with it!!)

Over the last year of your employment, you had become closer and closer to your boss. You’d even say you were friends. At this point, you regularly went out to dinner or for drinks after work together. You never thought this would be something that would happen, frankly; you were well aware of Maxwell Lord’s existence and who he (allegedly) was, and “friendly” was not one of the descriptors anyone would probably use to describe him. More like ruthless, and intimidating. And he was those things, at first. He did what he needed to do to succeed, to stay ahead of the competition. But once you got to know him as a person, not just a businessman? His sense of humor came out, he was genuinely nice to you, he was approachable.

You two worked together very well, and got along well, too. He told you once a few months after you started that he was accomplishing more than ever with you keeping him organized and on schedule, that you were the best assistant he’d ever had. And while part of you, at first, thought that he was just saying that, you soon realized he meant it very sincerely. He doesn’t just say things.

He’s also extremely observant. You supposed this sort of went hand in hand with being a salesman of sorts; being able to read someone to determine how well you’re doing, how likely they are to buy into what you’re selling. On one hand, this meant he knew how you liked your coffee, what drinks you usually order, what you usually have for lunch, that kind of thing. On the other, though, he was also familiar with your habits and quirks, and got a peek into your personal life. That last part? That was when he became a lot closer to you than he had been.

One day, about seven months into your tenure as Maxwell’s assistant, you came into work, coffee for yourself, Maxwell, and a handful of other coworkers in hand. Everything was normal, except you looked like you had just been crying your eyes out, because you had. You thought you’d calmed down enough, and fixed your makeup well enough no one would notice, and you thought you’d gotten away with it since no one asked about it as you handed out coffee… until you got to Maxwell’s office. You set his coffee down with a small smile, then turned to go to your desk, when he gently grabbed your wrist, stopping you from going any further, and motioned for you to sit down. He got up, and shut the door to his office, offering you two some privacy. He sat back down, and looked at you with a furrowed brow.

“Are you okay?” he asked, genuine concern in his voice.

“Um, yeah,” you lied. You averted your eyes and took a shaky breath. But the events of the morning just came flooding back to you. You really did think you had calmed down enough you could get through today without crying again, at least not at work, but the waterworks started again almost as soon as your answer to Maxwell’s question left your lips. Your lip trembled slightly, and you covered your face with your hands, not wanting to look so vulnerable in front of your boss.

“No, it’s not,” he said softly, leaning slightly over his desk, his look of concern only increasing. “What happened?”

You shook your head, sucking in a breath as you tried to steady yourself enough to speak clearly. “It’s nothing. Just… family stuff, I guess,” you answered. That wasn’t a lie; it was your family, your father to be specific.

Your relationship with him had always been strained, from the day you were born. Before you really knew Maxwell, you would’ve said that he and your dad would’ve gotten along like a wildfire. Successful businessmen with high expectations and some… at first glance, anyway, shady dealings. Your dad wanted a son, but never got one. On top of being a daughter, you were your parents only child. You had to single-handedly bear the brunt of your father’s frustration with that situation. You tried for a long time to live up to your father’s expectations, just to prove to him that you could, and you being a girl had nothing to do with it. You had amazing grades all through school, and got into a top college. But, sometime while you were in college, you gave up on proving yourself. You realized that you could never live up to his expectations because to him, you were fundamentally incapable simply by birth. It didn’t matter what you did, your father would still chastise you for not being good enough in one way or another. You finished your degree, and instead of a congratulations, he simply told you that a different degree would’ve been better. You got your first job after graduation, and he was unhappy with how low of a position it was. He was practically furious when he found out you’d taken a job as an assistant, because how much lower on the ladder could you be? It didn’t matter that this was the best paying job you’d ever had. It didn’t matter that you were happy with it. It just wasn’t good enough for him.

This morning, while you were getting ready for work, he’d called to remind you just how disappointed in you he was. Of course, he didn’t see it as that; he saw it as pushing you, but you knew he meant it when he said he was disappointed in you. You knew he meant it when he said at this point it was unlikely you’d find any more success than being some assistant. You knew he meant it when he said he wished he’d had a son. Part of you even believed him.

“It’s not nothing, or you wouldn’t be so upset about it,” Maxwell insisted. “You can talk to me.”

You glanced back over at him, and saw that worried look was still on his face. You sniffled a bit, and sighed. “My… my father… called me,” you started carefully. “We… haven’t ever gotten along well. I-I… he…” You paused, trying to remain composed enough to tell Maxwell what had happened. “I’ve never been good enough for him. He wanted to remind me of that this morning, I guess,” you said, wiping your eyes again.

Maxwell pushed a box of tissues on his desk your way. You looked back at him with a smile that communicated that it was what it was, and you’d been dealing with this bullshit from your father for years. His look back at you was now a mix of that concern and confusion, and he was sort of just staring at you.

He shook his head slightly to snap out of being baffled. He knew your credentials, he knew your accomplishments, and to hear that you somehow didn’t live up to someone’s expectations, your own father’s no less, was mind boggling to him. “Listen, I don’t know what he said, or why, but I can tell you this. You’ve accomplished so much in your life. He clearly doesn’t understand that if he feels anything but pride,” Maxwell told you. “You should be proud of yourself for your accomplishments. Don’t let his poor judgement, hell, his blindness, make you think you shouldn’t be.”

You gulped, blown away by his words. If you weren’t sure it would be a massive overstep, you’d hug him. Instead, you nodded. “You’re right. Thank you,” you said, quietly, your breathing slowly evening out. “That… means a lot.” It did. So few people in your life had told you to be proud of yourself.

“Of course,” he said. “If you need to talk about it more, I’m… I’m here. For you.” You could tell by the way he uncharacteristically stumbled over his words that this sort of closeness wasn’t something he was terribly used to, and it made you that much more grateful for it.

And truth be told, you scared the hell out of Maxwell. From the day he met you, he was absolutely captivated by you. The first thing he noticed was your smile. You had a general warmth radiating from you that drew him to you. As he got to know you, he started showing you parts of himself that he hadn’t shown anyone in years. He quickly found himself referring to you as not just his assistant, but his friend, and a close one at that. It was new territory for him, or at least territory he was no longer familiar with. He’d closed himself off from this kind of thing for the benefit of his career, and while he didn’t necessarily regret it, he could admit the respite from those walls you provided him was something he quite liked. As for why you scared him, though? You scared him because you were making him feel things he’s never felt before. The day you came in, eyes puffy from crying after your father had called you, two new feelings were added to the list; he wanted nothing more than to protect you from whatever had hurt you. He wanted to wrap you in his arms and keep you safe. He never wanted to see you upset like that ever again. The second feeling settled in his chest and made his heart beat faster and gave him butterflies. That was the first time that the thought crossed his mind.

Maxwell loved you.

But he couldn’t tell you that. There was no way you felt the same way. You were friends. He could love you as a friend, right? Right. That was fine. That was enough. It would have to be.

From that point on, Maxwell made it clear to you that you could always talk to him about whatever was bothering you. It didn’t matter if it was work related or not, he would listen, and it would stay between you two. That’s also when he started acting a little different. Not in a bad way, and you supposed it could just be another facet of himself that he doesn’t let people see very often, but it was still different. He started treating you to drinks and dinner more frequently, and buying you small gifts. You appreciated them greatly; they were always things that made him think of you, and you found through this he knew you pretty well. On top of that, he started opening up to you more, talking about his own personal life, which you found was fairly limited, but you got the impression he didn’t want it to be. He was very busy with work all the time, and barely had time to go and relax and enjoy himself doing something he wanted to do. It seemed your outings for dinner and drinks were about the only times he got to let go for a while.

You fell for him fast. You’d be lying if you said you hadn’t had a crush on him for a while, but that’s all it was, and all you’d let it be; a crush. But then he started caring about you, and you about him, and it became more than that. But you couldn’t tell him that you loved him. There was no way he felt the same way. You were friends. You could love him as a friend, right? Right. That was fine. That was enough. It would have to be.

But neither of you could keep those feelings hidden forever, which brought you to the present.

Your parents had invited you over for dinner, and you couldn’t very well say no. You had no other plans, and honestly, it had been a while, and you were running out of excuses as to why you couldn’t take the short subway trip uptown to see them. You would just eat, help your mom clean up, then go back home. You could survive this. But oh, how wrong you were. Your father was relentless, bringing up things that had happened years ago while you were in school that might have had an effect on your long term success. He questioned your choice in major in college, and dug into you for staying at your “disappointing” job as Maxwell’s assistant.

“You’re not even trying to climb the ladder there,” he said. “You’ve been there, what, a year now? You should’ve been promoted by now, or at least asking for it.”

“I’m perfectly happy in this position,” you responded, idly picking at the food on your plate. This conversation had already ruined your appetite. “I make more than enough money, and I enjoy it.”

“Sure, sure, but topping out as an assistant? That’s just throwing your career away,” he continued. “Waste of money, putting you through college. A son would’ve been an executive by now.”

That got to you for some reason. It was likely just the straw that broke the camel’s back, honestly, because he was laying into you all evening. But, before you could get emotional, you excused yourself from the table, and went to your childhood room, closing the door behind you. You burst into tears then, but tried to keep it quiet so your parents wouldn’t try to check on you immediately. You just needed some time to process what your father had said, refute it all, and calm down. You sat on the edge of your bed, and glanced at the phone that resided on your bedside table. Maxwell would let you talk to him, and he’d help. You’d called him before for things like this. It felt… different, though, calling him from your parents’ house knowing that you’d told Maxwell so many of the hateful things your father had said to you over the time you’d known him. You took a deep breath, though, and dialed his number. The phone rang a few times.

“Hello?” Maxwell’s voice came on the other line. It was his home number, so he didn’t answer the same way he did at work; it was still kind of odd to hear.

“H-hey, Maxwell, it’s me,” you said quietly, sniffling.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, his tone immediately concerned. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah, yeah, I’m fine,” you assured him. “Well. My parents invited me over for dinner.”

“Oh, god,” he said, his exasperated tone making you flinch even though you knew it was directed at your father, not you. “I’m sorry. How’d it go?”

“I-I…” you took another deep, shaky breath. “I’m still here. It’s just… been rough.”

There was a pause. “Stay there. I’m coming to get you,” Maxwell said. “What’s the address?”

“What? That’s not necessary, I can get home--”

He said your name firmly, but gently. It reminded you of the time he’d grabbed your wrist the first time he found out about all of this. “What’s the address?”

You relented, giving it to him. “Thank you. Again. For everything,” you said. You had to fight the urge to put all of your feelings on the table right then and there. “You have no idea how much it means to me.”

“Well, don’t thank me quite yet. I’ll see you in a few minutes,” he said, then hung up.

You weren’t sure exactly what he meant by that, and it did concern you a little bit. Still, though, you trusted him. You weren’t sure you would ever be able to thank him enough for everything he’d done for you. He’d done so much, been a shoulder to cry on countless times and you knew that wasn’t something that was easy for him, especially at first. You knew you had managed to tear down some pretty thick walls around him to get to this point.

About twenty minutes went by, and you heard a knock at the front door. For some reason this made the hair on the back of your neck prickle, sensing some tension that had arrived with your escape vehicle. You quickly stood and left your room, rushing down the stairs and gathering your things. Your parents looked at you in confusion. They were just wrapping up dinner and dessert was still to come.

“Where do you think you’re going?” your father asked, annoyance clear in his voice.

“I’m going home,” you said, as firmly as you could manage with how worked up you were just a few minutes ago. You slipped your shoes back on and swung the door open. You were expecting to see Maxwell’s driver, who usually ushered you to the car if he picked you up.

You were very surprised to see Maxwell himself standing on the doorstep to your parents’ house.

You stared at him, mouth agape, wide eyed as he smiled back at you in that calming, kind manner that you were familiar with in times like this, but something else was also in his eyes that you couldn’t put your finger on.

“It would be rude for me to stop by without saying hello, wouldn’t it?” Maxwell said in a hushed tone, looking over your shoulder and taking a small step towards entering the house.

“Maxwell,” you said quietly, almost warning, silently pleading with him to not make a scene.

“Don’t worry,” he assured you, gently putting a hand on your upper arm, squeezing lightly.

You gave him one last warning look before you stepped aside, leading him into the house.

Your father looked up from the dinner table and, upon seeing your boss, went about as white as a sheet. You’d have to live under a rock, especially in this city, not to know who Maxwell Lord was. And here he was, standing in the dining room. Your father knew, conceptually, that he’s who you worked for, and he definitely understood he was the most successful businessman in the country, if not the world, at the moment. That didn’t matter to him, though, regarding his disappointment in you.

“Mom, dad, this is my boss, Maxwell Lord,” you said gingerly, standing somewhat awkwardly next to him. You were on the verge of tears again for some reason, sure you would somehow manage to disappoint your father again. You tried not to care about it, but it was harder when he was in the same room as you.

Your father shot up from his seat so fast the dinnerware on the table clattered, and was over shaking Maxwell’s hand in the blink of an eye.

“It’s such an honor to have you in our home, Mr. Lord,” he said frantically, smiling like he’d just won the lottery. “Your business has done so much for the city, I really am impressed.” Of course he was impressed by Maxwell, a man he’d never met, and not you. “I’m sure having my daughter as your assistant has been a bit of a challenge but I trust she’s living up to your expectations.”

Maxwell not-so-subtly yanked his hand back from your father’s grasp. “Do you hear yourself?” he asked.

Oh boy, here we go.

“I beg your pardon?” your father asked, genuinely clueless as to what Maxwell meant.

“I knew you unfairly looked down upon your daughter’s accomplishments, but I had no idea you’d be bold enough to insult her to my face,” Maxwell responded, furrowing his brow at him. “A challenge? I don’t hire people who are going to be a challenge to work with. In fact, she is hands down the best assistant I’ve ever had. My productivity and efficiency has never been higher directly because of her talent, and that’s translated into a steady increase of the company’s overall value.”

Your father’s smile dropped slowly as he spoke. Hearing from one of the most powerful businessmen in the world that your daughter is actually talented and good at what she does despite being convinced of the opposite her whole life had to be sending his head spinning.

“You should be proud of her,” Maxwell stated. “But I get the feeling even having me tell you that won’t convince you. If you don’t stop calling her and harassing her with these bullshit insults, I have no issue using my entire legal team to assist her in suing you for emotional distress.”

Your father looked horrified. Maxwell smiled the same smile he gives difficult clients when he gets his way.

“Let’s go,” Maxwell said, turning and starting to walk towards the front door. You followed, giving your father a defiant look, accompanied with a small, surprised smile. If that didn’t get him off your back, you didn’t know what else would. “Oh, and one more thing,” Maxwell continued, adjusting his sleeves and straightening his shoulders. “Don’t think I don’t recognize your last name. If being sued isn’t threat enough, know that I’m well aware of and have evidence to connect you to that little tax fraud debacle from a few years back. I’m sure you know what I’m talking about.” Oh shit. You knew what he was talking about, but only because you’d accidentally overheard a conversation your father had on the phone years ago regarding the issue. You were sure no one else knew about it.

Your father started to sputter a response, but Maxwell held up a hand.

“Just be aware that if this continues, I will ensure you come to regret every negative word you’ve said to her,” he said. “Have a great evening.”

And with that, he opened the front door, ushered you out before stepping outside himself, and shut the door behind the both of you. You walked several steps down the sidewalk leading up to your parents doorstep, before you turned around to face him. You smiled, happy tears welling in your eyes. You’d never had the guts to stand up to your father, and you were grateful Maxwell had stepped in to help.

“Thank you,” you said, and you laughed a little bit between tears. “I don’t think I’ve ever seen him that dumbstruck before.”

“You’re welcome,” he said, approaching you and walking you the rest of the way to the car. “It felt like the right thing to do.”

“How’d you know about that tax fraud thing?” you asked.

“We actually acquired that company shortly after your father left,” he said. “They were sloppy cleaning up their records, there was enough to piece together what had happened and that your father was involved.”

“You took the time to dig through ten year old records to find dirt on my father… for me?” you asked incredulously. “How did I not know about this?”

Maxwell laughed a little. “Well, I had help, but it was quite a side project,” he admitted. “Took a couple months. Just so happened this was the perfect moment to put my cards on the table.” He paused outside of the car and looked at you, a new sort of deeply caring look on his face. “You know you deserve it, right? To not have someone insult you on a regular basis? To have someone be proud of you?” he asked.

You sighed, looking away. “I mean, logically, yes, I suppose,” you said. “It’s just… you grow up with it as the norm, told over and over again you’ll never be good enough, and it becomes very hard to believe.”

Maxwell opened the door for you, and you slid in and sat. He got in on the other side, and the driver began pulling away from the hell that was your parents’ house.

“You do,” he finally said, looking over at you. “I’m proud of you.”

You gave him a look of mild confusion. “You… are?” you asked.

“I absolutely am,” he answered. “I know it’s not the same, coming from a… a friend, but you deserve to know it regardless.”

You were quiet for another moment. You aren’t entirely sure you’d ever heard those words spoken to you. “Thank you,” you said again. Without thinking, you reached over and put your hand on his, then froze. But he kept looking at you, and didn’t pull away. You let your hand relax again, and smiled softly.

“It looked to me like you left in the middle of dinner,” he observed. “What do you say we go to my place and eat and have some drinks?”

You smiled a little wider. “That sounds nice.”

--------

“And then absolutely seriously, she looked over at her VP, then back at me and asked, ‘We sell what?’” Maxwell continued his story, about a new CEO of a company they regularly sold components to. He was smiling, laughing, like he always was after you’d both loosened up after a few drinks, but there was something… different about this evening.

You gasped. “She did not!” you responded, bursting into laughter. “How do you not know what your own company sells?”

“To be entirely fair it was a pretty small part of their product line, but still,” he responded. “And that isn’t something you just gloss over on a page, either.”

“Certainly not! That’d stand out in a list to anyone,” you agreed.

You were sitting on a bar stool next to the counter in Maxwell’s kitchen, and he was leaning against it across from you. He was rather good at making cocktails, a talent you never would’ve guessed he had, but you were impressed the first time he’d invited you over for this. From the living room, you could hear music from the record player he’d turned on when you arrived.

“Anyway, after a very awkward explanation from her VP, she seemed to understand what was happening, and the rest of the meeting went off without a hitch,” he finished. “Our contract with them is still good, and last time we revisited it she was still CEO.”

“Well, good for her, I hope that mortifying moment was a learning experience for her,” you giggled, taking another sip of your drink.

You liked seeing Maxwell like this. Relaxed, no suit jacket, shirt sleeves rolled up. It was further proof to you that you’d wiggled your way through his walls, that you were seeing who he really was. It reminded you of just how much you loved him, which in turn hurt a bit knowing you couldn’t tell him that.

“I wanted to thank you, again, for rescuing me,” you said, smiling at him. “You didn’t have to do that, but it means a lot.”

“Of course,” he responded. “I… honestly couldn’t stand the thought of you being there and putting up with that any longer than you had to.”

“It was rough. Last thing he said to me before I excused myself was that he thought it was a waste of money to put me through college, even though I got a ton of scholarships and we weren’t ever in debt, and that his hypothetical son would already be an executive,” you said, rolling your eyes. “I know what you do on a daily basis, I don’t think I’d want to be an executive given the option.”

Maxwell laughed a little. “I don’t know. You’d be very good at it,” he said. “I mean, you already are. Sometimes you do my job for me without even knowing it.”

You scoffed. “Well, sure, but I’m your assistant, that’s part of it,” you said, shrugging. “Being a figurehead and having to sell my company like that would be exhausting. I like being behind the scenes.” The record player transitioned into the next song, and you gasped quietly. It was one of your favorites, one you’d always imagined dancing with some attractive partner to with; of course, most recently, that imaginary partner was Maxwell. It was fairly slow, but upbeat enough you could describe it as happy. You closed your eyes and swayed a little bit to the music, smiling as you listened. “I love this song.”

You opened your eyes again, and Maxwell had made his way around the counter to stand in front of you, holding his hand out.

“Care for a dance?” he asked, smiling softly. His normal impenetrable confidence was wavering slightly, and if you didn’t know him as well as you did you wouldn’t have picked up on the fact he was a bit nervous.

You blushed a bit, hesitating before you took his hand. Friends dance, right? That’s a thing that happens. Nevermind your fantasies of doing this exact thing with this exact man. “I-I’d love to,” you answered. Butterflies erupted in your stomach as he helped you out of your seat and grabbed your waist with his free hand, keeping your hand firmly in his other. You hesitated for another brief second before you placed your free hand on his chest, and you two began swaying to the music together.

“As I was saying,” Maxwell continued, “you’d be a natural at it. You’re charming and beautiful and easy to get along with, it’d be second nature to you in no time.”

You smiled, but shook your head and rolled your eyes. “You have to say that, you’re like, my best friend,” you countered. Keeping it at best friend made something ache in your chest.

Maxwell released your waist for a moment to gently tilt your chin up to make you look at him. More butterflies. “I mean it,” he said, that same look in his eyes from when he walked you to the car. “You’re capable of more than you know. You really could do anything.”

You smiled a bit, averting your eyes, unsure how to respond to such a strong compliment. “If you say so,” you finally relented.

Maxwell let go of your chin, and brushed a strand of hair that had fallen into your face back, tucking it behind your ear. “I do say so,” he said. And for the first time in a very, very long time, you believed him. You smiled and laughed softly. It made Maxwell’s heart clench, and he wanted so badly to tell you everything. His hand fell back to your waist. You looked up into his eyes, and something there was calming, almost reassuring enough to give you a small boost of confidence. He saw the same thing in yours. You both spoke at the exact same time.

“I need to tell you something,” you said.

“I’ve been meaning to tell you,” Maxwell started.

You both laughed a little, and his laugh traveled through your hand on his chest and up your arm, and you felt closer than you ever have been.

“You go ahead,” you said, smiling back at him.

“No, no, I insist,” he responded, nodding a bit to yield his turn to you.

You sighed, trying to focus on the music and the motion of you two swaying to it, but it wasn’t helping. “Why don’t we say it at the same time?” you suggested.

Maxwell smiled at you in a way you hadn’t seen before. You were so damn adorable. Everything you did just made him fall a little more for you. “Sure, why not,” he agreed.

“On three, then,” you said, taking a deep breath. “One, two, three.”

“I love--” you both stopped everything as you realized you were saying the same thing to each other. “You.”

You both erupted into laughter, and you threw your arms around him, hugging him close. His arms held you around your waist, his hands splayed comfortingly at your back.

“And here I was afraid you didn’t feel the same way,” you said, pulling away slightly to take his face in your hands.

“That makes two of us,” he admitted, making a slightly apologetic face.

There was a pause where both of you just took a moment to process what had just happened. That your feelings were reciprocated, and very much real. Never again would you have to imagine dancing with Maxwell; you could do it whenever the song came on. After a moment, Maxwell’s eyes flicked from yours down to your lips, then back again. He smiled, almost giddy that this had all worked out. And, perhaps as childish as it was, he could finally ask you something he’s been wanting to ask for months.

“Can I kiss you?” he asked, his smile only widening as he spoke.

“I thought you’d never ask,” you responded, leaning in towards him.

Your eyes fluttered shut, and he closed the gap. Months of pent up feelings erupted, and the kiss was… intense. So many unsaid words and missed kisses and held back touches were wrapped up in this one kiss, it was almost overwhelming. He tasted like the old fashioned he’d been drinking, and you swore even this late into the evening you could still smell his aftershave as your nose pressed into his cheek. When you finally pulled away, you were completely breathless, but satisfied, and yet hungry for more. You opened your eyes and looked at him, and he looked about as dazed by what just happened as you were. You both laughed again, resting your foreheads together.

“Forgive me if this is too forward, but, would you like to stay tonight?” Maxwell asked.

You laughed quietly. “Maxwell, you just confessed your love for me, I don’t think that’s too forward,” you told him, leaning back in for another, brief kiss. “I’d like that.”

[wolfs-hunt1]

Soaring Love 2

Pairing: Severus Snape x reader

Word count: 2645

Warnings: none so far, sorry for any typo

A/N: I did this mood board for this fic because I thought it would look better if we had some visuals to help, and I had a lot of fun doing it.

Part 1

--- --- --- --- ---

Breakfast is a breeze, compared to the cold shoulder Severus gives you all the time since then. But all the rest of the faculty treated you warmly since most of them had been your teacher from the year you had had in Hogwarts.

You go back to your room, to start unpacking. You look around for a few seconds, accessing the room, and well everything could go. You reach inside your bag and rummage for a few moments until you can feel your fingers brush over a rectangular wooden object, pulling it out to reveal a bookcase. You walked to the wall that had a window, and put the tiny toy-sized bookcase on the ground, taking out your wand and performing an enlargement charm to restore the bookcase back to its original size.

Taking a step back to look at it, and make sure it fitted in that corner, you start to take the rest of your furniture out and placing them on the ground before enlarging them back to normal so you could decorate your room before the school term would start. After all, you would be living here until the term of the year, so you wanted to make it feel as homey as you could.

Books were flying out of the bag, floating themselves to the shelves with a swish of your wand. and your clothes were folding themselves in the air, before neatly laying themselves at the bottom of the drawers. The room looked like chaos if someone were to walk in, but it was little by little getting tidier, looking like a proper room and not an empty dusty space.

It took you the entire day to finish, but once you did, the room resembled a better-looking copy of your previous apartment, and it also seemed to be bigger as well, wish wasn't complicated since it was an overpriced matchbox.

Once your room was fully furnished and all you had packed before coming to Hogwarts was fully stored away you walked down your tower, to go to one of the many school courtyards to soak in the sun and enjoy the rest of the afternoon exploring the castle grounds and getting reacquainted with them. The school was bigger than what you remembered, even more so now that you had more places you could go to without getting into trouble since you are no longer a student. So many new shortcuts and hidden passages you were afraid to get lost eventually. Maybe you should get a map of the place, just as a precaution.

During the two next weeks you still had before term started you spend most of it with Madam Pomfrey, getting to know the Hospital wing like the back of your hand and where all the potions and salves were stored. She also showed you to the teacher's ingredients cupboard, where you could take all ingredients you might need for anything at all, and the staff room where you would spend your free time between classes to rest and prepare for the next one.

--- --- --- --- ---

The term has started but for a week, and already you could hear all the students complaining about the potions master and his classes, dreading the times they had to go to the cold damp dungeons to have potions. You never minded your potions professor when you had been in Hogwarts in your time, but from the small amount of time you had known Severus, you could see how the kids would dread him for his cold demeanor.

Your first year's classes hadn't started yet, so you had a bit more time to prepare them for next week when the easily impressed youngsters would be having their first flying class. You had prepared a simple first day, to just teach them the basics, and let them have a bit of fun at the end of the class. If they all behaved.

The older years had started their flying classes though and they were taking it pretty well to the fact they had a new flying instructor. They already knew the basics of flying, so they really enjoyed the practical classes where they learned different maneuvers and how to play quidditch. They were all extremely excited, especially second years, since they would have the opportunity to try out for the teams in a few weeks, so they were all showing off their moves and speed on the brooms to try and impress the team's captains.

In the meantime, you were being kept busy helping out Madame Pomfrey, that had asked you to help her with bandaging and healing some students that seem to attract trouble since day one. One second year, in particular, that seemed to have been pricked repeatedly in an herbology class by a particular spiteful Spiky Prickly Plant, that kept shooting its thorns directly at him, no matter how far he backed away.

With both classes and helping out in the hospital wing, you were being kept pretty busy, often time getting to your room existed and ready to sleep right away. Especially after the night, you had night patrol walking the corridors at night to make sure no student was out of bed after hours. Waking up after those days was harsh, and often time you wished you didn't have morning classes to give, so you could stay in bed for a few more minutes to soak in the warmth of the heavy blankets, that were a welcome addition to your bed once the temperature in the castle started to drop on the last months of the year.

Often you found yourself, in your free time, down at the quidditch pitch, just soaring calmly in your broom, letting it float in the gentle breeze, laying down in your broom while looking up at the passing clouds. Sometimes you timed yourself, racing around the goalposts and back to see if you still had in you to do all the maneuvers in a timely manner. Trying to beat your own personal best times. All this made time pass so quickly that it was almost Christmas break when you blinked next.

It's been a tiresome week, so once you reach your room you basically pass out from exhaustion in your comfy four-poster and sleep on. At least until you are rudely awoken by the shooting pain in your leg and back, causing you to almost jump from the bed because of it. You try to take deep calming breaths to try and clear your head long enough to get up and limp to your desk where you kept your spare potions, only to find all the bottles empty, the pain giving an extra jolt through you as if mocking you for not being prepared.

You made up your mind and start walking to the supply cupboard, many many flights of stairs below you. You curse every step of the way, cursing whoever thought having that many stairs were a good idea. thirty painful minutes later you find yourself searching the cupboard in search of the correct ingredients only to find that there was no dragon liver in it. You sighed and started to walk over to the potion classroom down in the dungeons, there should be some in the storage of the ingredients there, or… you though, if you went directly to Severus office, he would have some for sure.

Taking the solution that provided you with certainty and not a 'might have' you decided to walk to Severus office, a crushing pain in your leg almost rendering it useless, making you have to clutch at the walls for support so you wouldn't collapse.

You walked down the corridor and knocked on the door, not expecting at all the gruff voice that came from the inside, sounding tired and annoyed to be getting disturbed at this late hour. You opened the door and walked in, slowly, taking in all the details of Severus' office. You could see him at his desk, buried behind heavy potion tomes, reading them diligently and taking in its knowledge.

"Good night Severus." you say in a low voice.

"(Y/N). It's late, should you not be asleep?"

"I would, but I ran out of my potion for the pain. And ingredients were missing in the teacher's cupboard… so I thought you might have some here in your office. I just wasn't expecting you to still be awake at this time working." you could hear his sigh and the scrape of his chair while he rose, pointing at the chair in the corner of his office for you to take a seat.

"You do seem in a lot of pain, is everything alright?" despite his blank facade, there was worry in his voice when he asked it, walking to a small cauldron in the corner and lighting a fire underneath it and pouring some ingredients inside of it, starting to turn a murky grey color.

"It's from an old injury that never truly left. Sometimes the pain comes back, and I usually have potions to take, but my stash has run out without me noticing and replenishing it back. You know you can just give me some dragon liver and I'll be on my way back to my room where I can brew the potions myself, no need to burned you with it."

"No need for that, I am after all the potions master in this school. I am more than capable of making you the potions and it would be no burned what so ever." he interrupts you, making you sink down further into the plush of the chair you were seated on.

"Very well then." you concede, while you keep watching him move around his office collecting all the ingredients he would need to make the potions, and then adding them to the steaming cauldron, the liquid inside changing colors occasionally.

"You know, you can let me be the one brewing them from now on, that way you would make sure you always have a reserved stash brewed on time, whenever you might need them." the offer surprised you. Severus was willingly offering himself to go out of his way to brew you your pain potions whenever you would need some more, and that seemed so out of character for him that you just stared blankly at him for a few moments before nodding in agreement, not trusting your voice to make itself be heard with the amount of pain you were still on.

"Very well then." he said, getting his attention back to the potion bubbling away in his cauldron. The pain had subsided a bit, but not enough to let you go back up the stairs to your room. "Dumbledore said you used to be the greatest player on top of a broom Hogwarts had seen for a while." was he really trying to make small talk?

"Hum…. yes, I guess. I left Hogwarts in my third year, so I was only here for a little while. It was enough to get me noticed by some quidditch teams. But after my accident, no one would take the chances."

"Accident?"

"It was in my last year of school in Ilvermorny, I had already been invited to make the team of Haileybury Hammers once I finished the school year, when it happened. I was playing a school match when a rogue bludger came hurtling at me and made me fall from my broom." he was intently looking at you, while stirring the cauldron, not wanting to lose any part of the story.

"What happened next?"

"I broke almost every bone in my body, spent the rest of the school year in the hospital wing in a coma, recovering. I was at risk of never walking again, let alone pick up a broom, so the team revoked their invite, and after I recovered, no other team would take me in, they didn't want to risk it."

"And the pain?"

"It resurfaces once in a while, there's only so much magic can heal. So I use the potions to numb the pain so I can go on with the rest of my day." he was now searching his shelves for an empty bottle to pour the liquid potion inside of it, having one vial to you right away so you could take it. "Thank you, Severus." the potion took a few minutes to start working, but once it did, you could feel all the pain ebbing away right away, instead of just numbing it like your potions usually did. "This one is quite a strong potion."

"Well, I wouldn't be much of a potions master if I couldn't make the potions stronger. Besides you seemed about to pass out from the pain, so I thought something stronger could be of help."

"Thank you, once again for it."

"I'll have new batched ready for you every week, if you need more sooner let me know, for now, I'll bottle the rest of the cauldron and deliver it to you in the morning." he walked to the door to open it, so you started to rise from the chair so you could leave the man alone, he was clearly done with your presence bothering him so late into the night, when he surprised you by supporting your back with his arm, accompany you to the door and out to the cold dungeon. "I'll accompany you to your room, to make sure you don't fall."

"You don't need to, I'll be okay…" he interrupts you by making a dismissive sound and waving his other hand around.

"It's no big trouble, I couldn't sleep anyway, so maybe having a walk before going to bed will help. So… is that why you took the flying instructor's position here?" he asked after a long pause of somewhat awkward silence.

"Yes. Flying was my everything, my parents were always on the move, so I learned how to fly in a broom from a very young age, being up in the clouds was my safe haven. Flying was one of my only constants, I never keep many friends since I rarely stayed for even one year in the same school. Hogwarts was the only one I stayed more time. Once I woke up, and they told me I might not walk again I wasn't worried about it, really, I was more worried I would have to give up on flying in my broom." Severus looked at you once you said that, almost like he understood the pain of what had to give up on something that you loved doing did.

"Dumbledor talks highly of your skills, he even said he was most pleased that you took the position, and he could see you teach the first years with all the knowledge you had." that made you smile. The students were taking your classes very seriously and because of that, you always let them have little games at the end of your classes, like dodgeball, but on a broom, training their fast reflexes on the broom, and letting them have fun in the process.

"I'm glad I took the position. I missed the bustle hustle of quidditch, so teaching it is the next best thing. And the students make it worth it."

"They could do with more discipline and attention in classes." he complained, making you stifle a giggle by the annoyed look he had on his face while talking about the students. But you could still hear the fondness he held for teaching them. The two of you reached your door and after helping you inside, and making sure you wouldn't fall off, Severus walked to the door slowly. "Good night (Y/N)." he said and left without much noise, leaving you to think about all that happened since you walked down to the dungeons a couple of hours before.

[sml8180]

CiN Behind the Scenes ~ Ch 3: Infiltration

Original Upload Date: 9 September, 2020

Length on Google Docs: ~11 pages

Docs Word Count: 3,651

Reference Tally: 3

NOTICE: This chapter contained content featuring Janus’ father, who is Homophobic and Transphobic. As such, he misgenders and dead-names Janus throughout their conversation, and things do get physical between them at the end of their argument. I’ll be putting bold notices by any sections talking about this content, so that you can skip those sections if you so choose.

1) This was, obviously, a pretty long chapter. I think the average chapter length for this story was around 8 or so pages, with a few breaking 10 pages, and at least one hitting 12+.

        A) Fun Fact: This entire universe was originally going to be a 10-chapter idea and end at that. Obviously, I got really into it, considering Chaos is Normal on its own ended up 22 chapters.

2) You do not wanna know how much I looked into different types of hidden/wear-able cameras for this chapter. You really don’t. I did learn some really interesting stuff, though.

        A) The cameras Remy and Remus wear in this chapter are based on some stuff I found. Technically speaking, neither camera (nor any of the others I feature later in the story) are really out of the realm of possibility in the real world. Maybe a bit advanced, but they could be possible.

3) The team trying to get cameras going and clear, along with audio stuff is honestly fun to write. Similar segments pop up in other chapters, and it’s always amusing to me, for some reason.

4) “I was born first and you know it, Remus” is a line I forgot I wrote, but adore, honestly.

        A) My older brother and I have a 10-year gap in age, so I was literally winging every single sibling moment that goes down between the twins. Hopefully they mostly came out okay.

5) Apparently there’s still a typo in the original Doc that I managed to correct immediately before posing. Uh....

Dunno how I didn’t catch that going through before I got it into the Ao3 editor, but I did catch it before actually hitting Post on the chapter. So... At least there’s that?

6) I love writing Janus and Virgil being good friends/caring about one another. It’s just something I love.

7) Having Virgil and Janus get spotted by Remy and Remus (as well as by Logan, and Roman, via the camera feeds) is honestly something I originally didn’t really intend to put in. But, I felt like having these passing glimpses of the teens made things feel a little more connected when I went through and added it as an experiment, so I kept it in.

8) Giving Remy and Remus their various nicknames and codenames in this chapter was too fun.

        A) Calling Remy “Sandman” was something I really wanted to do at some point in the story, and the opportunity seamlessly presented itself here, so I couldn’t resist.

        B) Later in the chapter, Remus claims that members of the Venom Order (who all use a sort of codename, to protect their identities; hence why Virgil goes by Spider and Janus goes by Deceit) call him “Beetlejuice” literally came from the fact that while writing this chapter, I was listening to the “Beetlejuice” musical soundtrack a lot, and uh... Yeah, it kinda just happened from there. Opened up the perfect opportunity for a joke in a later chapter, too.

9) Logan having to divide their attention between the cameras, Remy and Remus’ audio, and having to listen to make sure Patton and Emile are alright is something I planned from the start of the story. I wanted this to happen at least once. Logan has been protective and even at times a bit paranoid over Patton’s safety for most of the boy’s life, and this is an example of them doing their best to make sure he’s safe, despite the fact they’re doing something extremely dangerous just upstairs.

10) I can’t help but headcanon that Janus almost always wears layers not just to help with dysphoria, but also because he fidgets with the top layer of his clothes when he gets nervous. As such, he has a lot of hoodies, jackets, and vests in his wardrobe.

        A) He also wears layers because he just likes how it looks. Yes, this is me projecting. I like layered looks, okay?

NOTICE: This is where I’m covering the conversation between Janus and his father. This section does describe Transphobia, abuse, and emotionally-distant “parenting” (if you can call anything Janus’ father does parenting at all). There will be a second notice once we are beyond that particular section, so simply scroll to that point if you don’t wish to read these next few points.

11) I wrote Janus’ father as being a very cold sort of parent. If he weren’t a Homophobic, Transphobic, all-around piece of shit, he’d still be a bad parent. He hardly gives a damn when his son does well, and only ever really responds if he feels Janus has done something wrong (like, y’know, existing, since Janus is trans, and Joseph refuses to see him as his son).

12) Joseph repeatedly misgenders and dead-names Janus throughout the conversation, and it was really hard to write. I had to check my work several times to make sure things were “correct”, and I didn’t have any slips that Joseph wouldn’t make.

        A) If any of you hated Joseph immediately once he opened his mouth, then I did my job. I wanted everyone to hate this asshole. I hated this asshole, and I created him. So, yeah, fuck Joseph “Viper” Prescott.

        B) Luckily, I didn’t need to write a ton of Joseph in this story (and likely won’t need to in future stories), because I really hated him from the start, in the “I created you to be awful, and god damn, you are awful” way.

13) Janus telling Joseph off by saying “I am your son! If you can’t see that, then you’re fucking blind, old man!” was a line I wanted to include some form of from the start of the chapter, and it went through a few different iterations before I finally decided I liked this one best.

        A) Also, Janus immediately realizing he went too far with that statement is intended to be a relatable moment (as we’ve probably all had that moment of, “I shouldn’t have said that”), but also intended to show that Janus knows how his father reacts to that kind of thing, and the resulting “Anxiety vs Might as well go all in” sort of conflict Janus has is there to hint that things really aren’t good at home, and it really has changed the way Janus tends to think and approach some situations.

14) Depicting the very quick emotional shifts with Joseph was another thing I had trouble with, but for a very different reason. I have ADHD (I don’t keep this secret, I’ve posted about it and make an effort to be open about the various ups and downs I deal with as a result), and it has a big impact on my writing style. It’s why I try to be descriptive (especially when it comes to places and character body language, expression, emotion, and clothing), since the details help me keep track of tone, location, and the like.

With Joseph, though, I had to throw some of that out the window. I try to keep emotional shifts for characters consistent, and at least hint to them coming up, to make it easier for myself (and other readers who might also have a hard time with sudden shifts and cues like that) to keep track of things. I couldn’t do that with Joseph. Because of how I wanted to portray him in this story (especially this chapter), I had to make things sudden. Hence the sudden and quick way he lashed out (though the inciting force is “clear”; he was angry concerning Janus’ comments), and the rapid shift to him once again being cold and stoic once he’d struck Janus and the teen was on the ground. It was hard to keep it draft-level quick, rather than going through and “refining” it.

NOTICE: We’re done talking about all the really bad stuff. There’s some talk of the aftermath, but all the really explicit things are out of the way, so it should be safe to continue.

15) Virgil is basically me at any gathering. Just, stick to the edges, people-watch, and silently panic if anyone approaches.

16) I think this is the closest Virgil gets to really flying off the handle in this story. I don’t think I ever have him get this close to going and physically fighting someone at any other point, and damn do I wish I had, honestly. Virgil is really protective of Janus, and seeing his friend (read: crush) in his current state sets him off. He’s still fuming when Janus gets his attention again and is clearly desperate to just get out of there, but he pulls himself together and helps Janus out, because he knows that going after Joseph won’t be the helpful thing in this situation.

17) Logan flexing their fingers before starting to really get to work once Remy patches them into the Order system is honestly something I have a habit of doing when I start writing, especially if it’s cold, since the joints in my hands tend to get stiff and lock up a little. Also, I really couldn’t resist the really obvious spy/hacker bit. The opportunity was right in front of me, and you all know by now I take the opportunities when they come.

18) I originally didn’t want to leave the chapter where it ended, since it was a pretty decent cliff-hanger and felt like an awkward stopping point at the time. That being said, I’m glad I did it. This and most of Chapter 4 were going to be one entity, but that would’ve ended up way longer (Chapter 4 ended up roughly 8 pages on its own), and it would’ve been a lot of fairly heavy content all in one go, so it was better broken up. It made me very glad for the little POV shifts throughout, because it gave me a clean place to cut the chapter apart and made it a little less awkward.

And, I think that’s about it for this one! This was a really long chapter (probably the longest I’d ever written as of when I wrote it), and it was full of stuff to help kick off future interactions in the story.

[datingintampafails]

Chapter 32: Timmy*

Timmy* gave off a frat-boy kind of vibe with the pictures in his profile, a trope that has become my type. His profile did seem to be half-heartedly filled out; his hometown was just the abbreviation of the state, his employment simply said "cardiac surgery," and a couple typos.

Mostly my reason for wanting to message him, in particular, was that one of his prompts about a travel story was very obviously cut off and he ran out of characters. I messaged him saying the cliffhanger was dramatic and wanted to hear the whole story. It was a very long story, involving being in Ireland and a random person coming into his and his family member’s room. I mentioned I didn’t have anything quite that interesting regarding my travels before. We chatted more and although I wouldn’t say we had a lot of similar hobbies and interests, the conversation did flow well. He was definitely more active than I, going to the gym often and eating pretty healthy and en mass. Very much a gym bro type. I also had assumed he was a surgeon, given his position being cardiac surgery, but then learned later he was more involved in some sort of programming instead for cardiac devices, so not really cardiac surgery per se.

When we moved away from Hinge and onto text messaging, we were both mutually behaving as if we had known each other a while, and better than we did. At one point, he had asked, “are you a guy version of me?” To which, I was very aware of how little we knew about each other, which led me to respond that it was too soon to tell.

I did however confirm my place as forever the more aggressive one; I text him one day "Timmy*, when they fuck are we going out?" Not that it had been too much of a long time talking, but just that he had not yet made a move, and that we were obviously getting along and it would make sense for us to take that next step. We plan for a few days from then, a Tuesday, after work, and that it would have to be more or less played by ear because of our jobs' schedules being semi-unpredictable. My easy place, Armature Works, was chosen as where we would meet up.

Our date got pushed back slightly, as I got off on time, but he was going to be held up at work later than expected. He did however give me ample heads up, so I just relaxed at home a little longer than I would have otherwise, and perfected my outfit and minimal make-up. The day of the date, and leading up to it, I made jokes about being a catfish and that I was actually a middle-aged, fat, Russian man. I continued this while I waited for him when I was describing what outfit I was wearing so he could recognize me better with my mask on, then later added that I was still a middle-aged Russian man, but that I was still wearing a skirt and crop top. I waited for him on a bench for almost 30 minutes. I arrived on time to when he had delayed the date, but still too early apparently. Luckily, I had brought my headphones, so I just listened to some music to pass the time by.

Finally, I received a text message saying that he had parked and then that he could see me. Nothing is more uncomfortable than being seen and not seeing who is looking at you. I looked around and didn't see anyone that looked like him, so I went back to staring at my phone. Eventually, a man looking more like him appeared trotting down the small set of stairs next to me. Although he definitely wasn't short, he seemed shorter than what I was expecting, and his hairline seemed to be just starting to recede.

He was not familiar with the location as much as I am, so I took it upon myself to give him a tour of the location. Despite being indoors, and still pretty amidst a pandemic in late February, Timmy* kept taking his mask off. As a healthcare worker, I was confused and appalled; he should know better. I yelled at him every time to put it back on. Once he said, "you're one of those huh?" I almost rolled my eyes back into my head. Then he also asked me, "well when can I take it off?" to which I responded, "when we are outside and/or we sit down to eat/drink." He got a beer at one of the bars, and it was a beer that had some marijuana in it, which was an interesting choice. After having toured the whole place, it was time to split off to order our respective meals. I got my food, and a drink, and wandered over to the area I had last seen him, as he had said he was going to get a pizza. He was nowhere to be found, so I text him asking where he was. He indicated that he was over by where he had gotten his beer.

I found him and then he told me that he had ordered food from two different restaurants because he couldn't decide and also eats so much due to his athleticism. We found a spot to sit nearby outside, and it is a lovely night, we were comfortable in the fresh air. We both finally did take off our masks and started to eat.

I half-heartedly apologized for being so hard on him regarding the mask-wearing, but emphasized that I am passionate about proper mask-wearing because of my experience with having the virus and wanting to make sure to reduce the spread. He then said, "Oh you had COVID! I'm in a way glad to hear it." He then pauses before saying, "I have COVID too. My doctor said I'm asymptomatic? So I'm totally good." My eyes must have gotten the size of saucers; I leaned away from him and was looking around seeing if anyone had heard him. "Wait what?" Is all I could say. "Uh, no. Please tell me you're joking?" Timmy* stares at me confused, "I'm asymptomatic! So that means like I don't have it."

I am prepared to leave immediately. "So you had a positive test? What? Why are you here right now?" I say. Finally, he drops the rouse and admits he was kidding, but that he got me. "That was not funny. I was legitimately terrified!" So far, this date is bizarre. He mentions that because I joked around so much that I would appreciate it. I did not.

We eat our food and chat. Unfortunately, he also is a person who seems to eat with their mouth open. Another strike. Timmy* has become very comfortable around me, as he also decides to tell me another long story about the time he was "sexually assaulted by a doctor." Which was that he went to a doctor for a physical and that she had grabbed his testicles and had him cough, though the way he told it was extremely drawn out and had many mini-stories leading up to the point that was supposed to be the assault. I then told him, "I'm sorry to say that your doctor was not trying to hit on you on anything, that is a normal thing that happens with mens' checkups." This was news to him. It was obvious that he is not a well-versed healthcare worker.

Once we finished our food, I suggested we walk along the river. First, though, I wanted to drop off my leftovers in my car. We walk to it and I make him guess what kind of car I drive. He is impressed by my car and we don't linger long before I say we should leave the parking lot. He tells me that he has a muscle car, which is so random and I would never put him in a car like that. Whereas a sixteen-year-old girl might be googoo-gaga over this, as a full-grown adult, it isn't quite as alluring to have a car like that.

While on the riverwalk, I become irritated at the fact that he walks very slow. Slower than I am able to walk. It makes no sense as I am significantly shorter than he is, so my strides shouldn't be longer than his. I mention to him that he walks slow and I ask that he walk a little faster. He picked up the pace, but then slowly reverted to his tortoise-like speed over time. I tire of our uneven velocities and we take a seat on some rock benches. We chat about brief things and I suggest we walk back. Again, I battle with the paces, mention it a couple more times that I am unable to walk as slow as he walks.

We get back to the main area of Armature and take a seat in some oversized chairs. He tells me about his family and some stories about his relationships in middle school and high school, which are also drawn out and bizarre. It nears 10pm, and we are told by staff that they close at 10. A couple minutes til, I remind him we need to leave and I ask where he parked. He parked in a different lot, I offered to walk him to his car. He offers to drive me to my car. We do so and his muscle car is indeed very overly-masculine. He goes on to go through a bunch of random songs on Spotify, only playing each song for less than 30 seconds, very ADHD-like. He drives me to my car, but wants to keep me there, again showing me more songs. I'm politely just listening as he flexes on all the types of music he listens to. He tries to show off that he knows "alternative music," my preferred genre, but I point out that a lot of the songs he's playing are more "pop-punk" or just old alternative jams.

He compliments my music taste and mentions that he has noticed I am adept at knowing song names, musicians, movies, and so forth. I begin to joke that likely I am a little autistic, adding "I'm working on my eye contact," as I make direct eye contact with him. What he says next, is something that I was not prepared for, and something that still baffles me, and possibly always will. "Yeah, you do look a little retarded." Immediately, I burst out into laughter; not because I think what he said was funny, but because I am so bewildered and shocked by what was just said. Eventually, through the laughter tears I am able to get out, "Dude you shouldn't say that to a woman." He insists it was a joke and makes excuses, but I keep laughing, with my hand on the door handle just waiting for a good moment to step out. I repeat that what he said isn't cool, and eventually stop laughing long enough to say, "alright, on that note, I think I should head out." Being friendly, I still ask that he tell me when he gets home since I know he has a longer commute home than I do. I wave goodbye through our car windows.

The formalities are complete; he texts me ever so briefly the next day, respectfully I respond, knowing well I never plan on going out with him again. Then it seems we have a mutual ghosting situation, as I don't try to text him, nor he to me. This day I have another date, and after that one, I have no one that I want to communicate with as that is also a dud. All is good until a few days later when I am out with my friends in Ybor, drunk. I get a text from Timmy* saying "yo." I lament and groan and my friends ask about my reaction. I explain the situation and one of my guy friends asks for my phone. I hand it to him as he starts to text him on my behalf.

My phone is with my friend, but with my Apple Watch, I can see the text conversation and when he is responding. I start yelling "oh god please don't bring him here. I don't want to see this guy." Respecting my wishes, my friend decides to still fuck with him, but prevent this poor soul from spending money on an Uber and coming down.

My friends then send a selfie of themselves, with me not in it, saying "she's with me." I yell at them more saying, let this guy be, just ignore him. However, instead, my friend takes it a step further.

I tell my friend that he was too harsh and that I of course would have told him I wasn't interested, but a lot more mature and kindly. When later I check, understandably Timmy* has unmatched me on Hinge*, likely blocked my number. No loss there though.

[breakingsomething]

the fall part twelve - i can't think of a clever name for this one

basic summary: marvin visits naomi, and henrik decides to look for anti.

trigger warnings: extreme distress, destructive behaviours, talk of medication, brief seizure, implied suicidal ideation

just an extra warning - this chapter contains an extreme, destructive breakdown of a character that might be upsetting if you're triggered by that. i just figured i'd stress that just in case.

the next week passed surprisingly normally, considering.

hecate was still pretty much on lockdown. kazuki and several other magicians, some even from other branches around the country, had added some new, reinforced spells all around the entire place. almost no one but some of the higher ups were allowed in, and the damage control from one little break in was taking a long time. marvin was even involved, for some reason; kazuki had wanted him personally, most likely to do with jackie being his brother. he hadn't been happy about it, but he had always felt obligated to clean up other people's messes, including whatever the fuck jackie had gotten himself into this time.

speaking of messes, no one knew where anti was. he had disappeared not long after their trip to the music shop, going god knows where... the thought of him being free again was admittedly very annoying. but marvin comforted himself with the fact that anti was still very sick and there were wards around the flat, even stronger ones that kazuki herself had come round to install. they weren't sure what had happened to the original wards, either. kazuki said it was most likely caused by the breaking of the veil (which he and chase had filled henrik in on) and that it was nothing to be worried about anymore.

and speaking of that, marvin had started to notice more and more of the strangeness now happening around the city. people walking by like they were invisible, people repeating dialogue when faced with anything even remotely odd. "i suppose that explains why ellie and parker acted so strange when i visited," henrik mused after the whole thing had been explained to him. then he told them about that problem in turn, including the glitched out car, and they all agreed it was a very fucked up situation. apparently, the problem was "being managed" (kazuki's words), and marvin honestly was too done to look too far into it.

it was early one afternoon that marvin was in the kitchen with henrik, somehow managing to talk completely normally with him. their relationship had definitely been pretty stiff for a while, considering all the anti stuff, but for the time being, they had reached a silent, temporary truce. that was good enough for marvin. "how'd you sleep?" he asked, as way of greeting.

"same as usual," henrik mumbled, face practically in his cup of coffee and glasses slipping off his face. maybe that had been a dumb question. "as well as i probably could have, given…" he sat up slightly, waving his hand in a clumsy circle.

marvin nodded, setting about making toast. he was never hungry for much lately. "try and relax or something. you always work too hard."

"well, someone has to," henrik snapped. then he blinked, letting out a shuddering sigh. "i didn't mean that."

"i know," marvin said quietly.

they didn't say a lot after that until someone knocked on the door.

"are you expecting anyone?" marvin asked, to which henrik shook his head and set down his cup, suddenly looking nervous. with anti's location unknown and jackie having managed to break through even hecate's defenses, his paranoia has been at an all time high, and his eyes widened upon seeing marvin stand to go see who it was.

"wait, what are you -" he started, breath catching as he shrank back. his hand that he'd held up in a "stop" gesture hung in the air uselessly. "i - is it -"

marvin smiled softly. he used to get so frustrated with henrik's constant fears and worries, but he knew now to be more patient about them, especially as of late. "it's fine, hen. see?" he peeked through the small rectangular window on the door and blinked when he saw who it was. "uh. it's not anti."

he pulled open the door. "lucas?" he said questioningly, smiling despite his confusion. "how did you get our address?"

the blonde on the doorstep grinned back and laughed awkwardly. "oh, naomi told me a while ago. just in case i ever had to go save your asses in an emergency." then his smile slipped, and his gaze fell to the ground. "actually, that's… kinda what i came here to talk about. if that's ok."

"no, no, that's fine," marvin insisted, stepping aside to let lucas in. the man smiled at henrik, who grinned weakly, silently moving his hands under the table to hide how they shook. marvin raised an eyebrow at him as lucas went by. "do you want coffee or tea?" he asked, to which he responded "tea" and marvin set about making it. lucas stood awkwardly for a second before marvin offered him a chair and he sank down next to henrik, who quietly shuffled his chair an inch or so away. everyone noticed. no one commented.

"so… what's up?" marvin asked, drumming the table with his fingertips. lucas hesitated, blowing the air out of his cheeks.

"naomi's definitely been acting strange lately," he started. "i've tried talking to her a few times, texting and on calls, and she always sounds so off."

marvin frowned. "off how?"

lucas touched the side of his neck, scrunching up his face. "well, she's texting differently. usually just, like, one word answers. and i… this sounds so dumb, but she never usually makes so many typos as she does now." he laughs awkwardly. "i didn't think you could make that many, uh, typos in one word. but, yeah. and she sounds different on call too, when she answers. she gets pissed off if i ask why, though. has anything happened to her recently?"

something banged down the hall, and they could hear someone padding towards the kitchen. "morning, assholes," came a loud, cheery voice, and chase popped round the doorway. his hair was down for once, a curly blonde mess around his shoulders, and he was wearing an oversized black t-shirt over his boxers. he froze when he saw lucas, his grin immediately morphing into an expression of horror.

lucas had gone very red. "afternoon, chase," he said in a slightly higher pitched tone than usual. he glanced down at his tea again, not making eye contact.

chase didn't even say a word. he just darted from the room again, face on fire.

"well, that was fun," henrik said drily after a moment.

"sorry about chase," marvin said, holding back a giggle at lucas's face. "he's just like that."

"oh - oh, yeah, ok," lucas stammered, seeming just slightly flustered. he cleared his throat, smoothing his hair back before he continued. "anyway, what was i saying?"

"naomi acting weird," marvin said. he tossed his head to get hair out of his face while he thought. he suddenly wondered why lucas had come round to talk to him about this instead of texting or something. "yeah, she did say she was feeling off. i don't know, we've not been speaking as much as usual."

henrik suddenly got up and went to wash his mug. lucas watched him go before turning back to marvin. "what has she said to you? sorry if it seems like i'm being nosy or something, i just - i care about her a lot. she's always been really sweet to me, i guess."

something hot and unpleasant panged in marvin's chest. he didn't pause to think about what it could mean. "she said some more - some personal stuff. i don't know how much you know, but - yeah. i'm gonna go visit her today, maybe."

lucas nodded, grimacing. "sounds like a plan. i really hope she's ok. tell her much love from lucas, ha."

marvin chose to ignore the tight clenching of his chest and gripped his mug with white fingers, nodding like a bobblehead and resisting the urge to bite his lip again.

henrik made a small noise of surprise as he fumbled in the sink and nearly dropped his mug again. "sorry, sorry," he said when he realised lucas was looking at him again. "i'm a bit clumsy this morning, i think."

marvin could see how his hands were shaking. "i'll dry," he offered, and henrik smiled gratefully. lucas dithered at the table, folding and unfolding his hands.

"so how goes the search for anti, marvin?" he asked, and they made small talk for about ten minutes while marvin and henrik did the rest of the dishes. it seemed henrik was adjusting a bit more to having someone new in the house, and even chatted with lucas a bit himself. marvin mentally thanked lucas for being so incredibly sweet and patient. he was the perfect person to help henrik get used to talking to other people again.

a door crashed open somewhere, and there was a pause before a bright red chase entered the room, grinning nervously. he had brushed his hair and pulled it back into a ponytail extending from the back of his cap, and he was now wearing a bright yellow hoodie and black jeans. "morning, my wonderful brothers and also lucas, who i didn't know was here today and i apologize greatly for calling an asshole earlier," he announced, giving an embarrassed giggle at the end. henrik rolled his eyes.

"oh, so you're not sorry for calling us assholes?" he said jokingly. he and marvin laughed as chase flipped them off and planted himself at the table, just across from lucas.

"apology accepted, chase," lucas grinned. "i like your hoodie."

chase's shoulders shot to his ears and his face somehow went redder. "thank you, thank you. got it at… primark." the two of them made eye contact for a moment, and there was a second of awkward silence as marvin felt his phone vibrate and pulled it out to look at it.

"naomi's texting me. i'll probably go round to hers today," he said, already deciding what to send back. "will you guys be ok here? hen?" he looked up at his younger brother, and henrik blinked, surprised, before a small grin broke across his face.

"we will be fine, yes," he said quietly, not looking right at marvin. "thank you for asking. i might go out later too, actually. something i have to do. though -" he turned to look at chase. "i'm sure this one will be fine here, won't he?"

chase stuck out his tongue, face flushing, and marvin went to ruffle his hair as he went by before realizing he might not want to take off his hat with lucas here and instead smacked the top of his head. "yeah, be good. lucas, you can vibe here for a bit if chase and henrik are cool with it. see you."

"say hi to naomi for me," lucas smiled. and that's when marvin couldn't just not say anything anymore.

"couldn't you just tell her yourself?" he said without thinking twice. "i was under the impression that you guys were maybe… together, or - or something."

lucas blinked, then laughed loudly, tossing back his head. "oh no, i - marvin, i'm gay," he explained, giggling. henrik snorted into his coffee, ducking his head. chase made a strange sound that marvin had never heard him make before. and marvin just stood for a moment, taking that in.

"you're - oh! oh, shit!" he said. then he laughed too, out of surprise. "oh, i'm a dumbass!"

"marvin, i am begging you to just go before you make an even bigger fool of yourself, you oblivious asshole," henrik giggled. he was shaking with laughter, head on the table and holding his coffee in front of him. "please. i cannot take this so early in the fucking day."

"ok, fuck you, whatever," marvin spluttered as he put on his coat at the door. "i hate all of you. bastards."

they were still laughing as he left.

-

naomi wasn't in the shop. she did, however, leave the door unlocked, texting marvin to go right in. he had done this before, but it felt different somehow. colder. the door to naomi's flat was open too, and he went inside, shivering slightly.

"nai?" he called. her flat looked even messier than usual; an immediate bad sign. "hey, i'm here."

he heard a grunt from her bedroom. he knocked hesitantly, making a face that she couldn't see. "hey there. are you alright? should i… come in?"

a pause. "mm," she hummed quietly. "if you want to."

marvin took that as a yes. he slowly opened the door before stepping inside, leaving it open behind him. her room was a mess. vines growing unattended on the pale green walls, clothes thrown around without care, books torn up and ruined, a lamp knocked over on the floor. it looked like someone had tried to destroy the place. his heart dropped when he saw naomi sprawled across her bed in leggings and a baggy pink hoodie, eyes closed. "oh, hjärtat, what's wrong?"

"i don't know," she mumbled. she had clearly been crying; her face was red and splotchy, and the carpeted floor was scattered with used tissues. "everything, maybe."

marvin gave a small sigh and sat down gingerly on the end of the bed, hands folded in front of him. naomi didn't move to accommodate him, and just stared at him with half lidded eyes. "have you taken your medication?" he asked tentatively.

"no point," she said softly. she turned her head away, pressing her cheek to a tear stained pillow. "it never helped me anyway."

"yes it did," marvin protested. "you haven't had an episode in years."

"hadn't," naomi corrected. "it was only a fucking matter of time."

marvin was silent for a moment. what could he say? "nai, i'm - i'm sorry."

"don't be," she said. she suddenly sounded more cheerful, a false warmth that marvin immediately didn't like. "not your fault."

he clicked his tongue, shifting uncomfortably in his seat. "if you go back to the doctor's, they can try and prescribe you new meds -"

"i'm sick of meds!" without warning, she leapt from her bed to her feet, causing marvin to yelp and fall back. naomi twirled round and round, leaves blooming on her fingertips and flying into the air. "i'm fucking sick of it, sick of being loopy, sick of being sad, sick of being mad! fuck this shit! fuck it, fuck it!"

marvin breathed deeply. he'd handled naomi in this state before, he could do it again. "listen a second," he tried, standing so she could hear him better. "naomi, sit down a second, k? i want to -"

"don't treat me like a kid!" she stopped spinning, rage suddenly alight in her eyes as her gaze burned into marvin. "i get that maybe i act like one sometimes, maybe i'm immature, but i am a grown woman! why is it that people always forget that? just because i'm fucked in the head doesn't mean i'm incapable!"

"naomi!" marvin cried, shocked. he held up both hands to the sides of his head, trying to keep his expression and voice calm. "naomi, i'm not infantilizing you. i know you, ok? you're not normally like this -"

"what, insane, you mean? go on, you can say it!" she whooped, twirling towards the window and throwing open the curtains. bright light screamed through and lit up the room in daylight. "i'm always like this! always an asshole, a bitch - just ask kai! i hurt him when i was like this! just that stupid medication, thinks it can control me! nothing can control me anymore!"

"is that - is that why you stopped talking them?" marvin tried. fuck, but he couldn't remember who kai was either. "you thought they were controlling you?"

"they were!" she shouted. she blinked rapidly, rubbing her eyes and breathing heavily. "they've always been controlling me, the fucking things. making me all "ooh, sweet little naomi gudmundson who does flower magic and owns a flower shop and dates good magician boys and never cries and sings like snow white and makes fucking birds flock to her window!" well, well, could a lovely disney princess do this?"

marvin realised what she was going to do right before she did it. "nai, no!" he cried, but naomi shoved him away and curled out an arm, gritting her teeth and tearing her hand towards the ceiling. an enormous dragon tree suddenly began to crack through the floorboards, twisting into shape, branches and leaves sprouting and extending larger and farther out, hitting the sides of the room. marvin was very quickly running out of places to stand clear of the plantlife. "naomi, stop it!" he yelled, trying to get to her, but he couldn't even see her at this point. "you're going to hurt yourself!"

"like i care!" she snarled, and the tree shook, still growing rapidly and scraping the ceiling. "i don't give a shit about anything anymore! i'm tired, i'm tired, i'm so tired, i'm…"

she trailed off. the tree's growth slowed until it stopped completely, standing tall in the middle of the room. marvin quickly clambered over the roots to get to her, avoiding branches that swung at his face. "naomi," he said quietly as she came into view. her eyes were wide and unfocused, breathing heavily, hands hanging in the air in front of her. marvin gently took her arm and, when she didn't react, turned her from her tree and helped her sink to a part of the floor not covered in roots. "hey, hey, uh… lyssna på mig, listen to me, naomi."

"i ruined my bedroom," she whispered. staring at the floor with wet eyes. "i did that. it was my fault."

marvin stroked her hair back from her face. "hey. it's not your fault. your illness isn't your fault. you just - you have to take your medication, naomi."

she sniffled and dropped her head forwards into marvin's arms. "i'm sorry. so sorry. i'm - a skitstövel. i'm tired. i'm sorry."

she seemed to be coming down from the sudden mania rather quickly. marvin glanced up at the tree, wondering if there was a way he could fix it. he sighed shakily. "not your fault. not your fault, nai. don't say such things about yourself, we can fix this, we can fix this, ok? jag älskar dig, i love you and we can fix all this. listen to me. listen to my voice, naomi."

neither of them were sure how long they stayed they. but it was a long time before either person let go of the other.

-

henrik knew this had been a mistake the second he arrived at the metal gates.

first off, he wasn't sure how to get in. he assumed anti glitched through when he needed to, but henrik was clearly going to have no choice but to climb the fence. fuck, he was grateful that he'd been working out a bit more lately. even then, his arms screamed at him the whole time and he practically fell off down to the other side.

"anti!" he yelled, pushing himself to his feet and stumbling to the empty stone doorway of the abandoned waterworks. "i know you're here, asshole!"

no response. henrik obviously hadn't expected one. instead, he stepped inside, his footsteps echoing through the enormous, dim grey room. marvin had told him that hecate had already looked for anti here, but henrik knew the man far better than marvin did, whether he liked it or not. anti was here. and henrik was going to find him.

"anti!" he called again. the stairway was very narrow, the steps made of thin stone with gaps at the edges. henrik's legs felt like jelly as he climbed them, wishing there was a bannister to hold onto. "it's me, henrik. you know me. fucking unfortunately." he added this part on slightly quieter before raising his voice again. "i want to talk to you."

anti was in the first room on the top floor.

he was sitting on the ground cross legged with a silver laptop on his legs, rapidly typing one handed and leaning against the wall. his hair was pulled back in a small ponytail, a dirty yellow scarf wrapped around his neck. he barely looked up as henrik came in and stared at him, cold ice filling his veins at the sight of the man who'd kidnapped and tortured him for two whole months.

"anti," henrik said, much quieter. he winced at how his voice shook with sudden fear. he clenched his fists and tried to look more intimidating. "you're - you're not supposed to be here."

anti just kept typing. henrik frowned. "where the hell did you - where did you get that computer? are you even getting wifi up here?"

"stole it, and yeah," anti signed. one handed, again. "you forget what i am. i can do anything. or i used to be able to. i had to steal this the old fashioned way. it's funny that the only apparent aspect of my power that the red spandex bastard left me was the ability to be a walking hotspot."

henrik really didn't know what to say to that. anti finally looked up, his brown eyes dull and face ashen. "are you just going to stand there? what do you want?"

henrik's mouth opened and closed, and he took shaking breaths to try and calm himself. "i - i don't… know." his shoulders slumped, and his gaze fell to the floor. "i don't know. maybe i wanted to turn you in to hecate, maybe i wanted to kill you. i don't know."

"kill me then," anti shrugged. "i wouldn't mind. i mean, you'd be completely justified -"

"i'm not gonna stoop to your level," henrik snapped. "and - and why are you only using one hand? didn't your cast get taken off?"

anti breathed out sharply through his nose. "it did, yes. are you staying here? i'm busy."

henrik titled his head. "with what? what the hell do you do up here?"

anti's gaze bore into henrik, scrutinizing him. "you're still afraid of me, aren't you, doctor? even now. even when i'm like this, you're still genuinely afraid of me."

"i am not," henrik lied. he straightened, trying to ignore how he was trembling. the knife he still kept in his trouser cuffs felt heavy. "i could fucking kill you if i wanted. i could've killed you the day you left jack and i held the knife that you planned to use on him. you're the pathetic one here."

anti shrugged again, smirking. "sure, sure. like you -"

without warning, his body jerked, and anti's face screwed up in pain. he made several strangled noises, trying to wrap his arms around himself, but they were suddenly shaking and twitching too hard for him to. henrik stepped back as anti shoved himself away from the wall, computer falling off his lap, and pulled his knees to his chest to bury his face in.

it only lasted a moment. once it had passed, anti gave several trembling breaths, sitting up again shakily and checking his laptop to see if it had been broken. he didn't look at henrik, just tried to go back to what he was doing. henrik swallowed, considering what to say.

"how long has that been happening?" he asked. he hated how he instantly had his professional doctor voice on, gentler for dealing with patients. he shook it off and went back to his normal tone. "the seizures, i mean."

anti rolled his eyes. "my whole life? you know this already, doctor."

"i meant -" henrik groaned frustratedly and didn't finish. "whatever. if you want to be an asshole, fine by me. i'm going."

"sure you don't want to take up the offer of killing me?" anti signed. "it'd be fun, i swear."

"go to therapy, you sick fuck," henrik called as he left. he didn't bother waiting to see if anti would say anything in retaliation. he just left the building, fuming and trembling with rage. why had he even bothered to come here? what had he accomplished apart from scaring himself? maybe he should have taken anti up on his offer after all. honestly, who would miss anti or care if he died? would henrik feel guilty afterwards? why was he thinking about this?

fuck, maybe he was just tired.

-

marvin didn't get home until late that night.

naomi was staying with one of her sisters while a few magicians from hecate fixed her shop. the tree had, apparently been "easy enough to get rid of," according to the plant specialist who had been sent to help out, but the entire room itself had been destroyed. alice - naomi's sister - had been very kind about it all. "i'll keep a good eye on her, and let you know if anything changes," she'd said quietly when marvin had pulled her aside to see if naomi would be ok. "and i'm sorry you, uh, had to see her melt down like that. i don't think she's had an episode that bad since she was a teenager."

marvin had smiled at her reassuringly. "hey, it's cool. i've dealt with things like this before. and i care about naomi a lot, so i'm willing to do whatever i can to help her."

now, the house was dark. "hel-lo?" marvin called as he stepped inside. not a single light on anywhere that he could see. "chase? henrik?"

his mind suddenly flashed back to just a couple months prior, to coming home and finding his brothers gone, house upturned, the stench of black magic thick in the air. his heart skipped suddenly, and he tore through the kitchen to the living room to try and find them. "shit, shit - guys! chase, henrik, where are -"

then he noticed. through the living room window, he could see into the back garden, and the two people sitting on the bottom step. chase and lucas, deep in conversation. no wonder they hadn't heard him. marvin sighed, relieved, and was about to turn away when he thought wait a second and looked through one more time.

chase and lucas were very close. hands practically on top of each others. marvin couldn't hear them, but he could see them laughing warmly, huge grins on their faces. oh, ohh. the realization struck marvin.

this definitely did explain a lot. no wonder henrik had called him oblivious. marvin laughed to himself and closed the curtains again, turning on the living room light to let them know someone was home. he could worry about where henrik was later. right now, he thought he just needed to sleep.

[blooming-inthedark]

Yesterday I had a traumatic morning

A friend called me, and I answered. He suffers from bipolar disorder and depression. He sounded sad so I set up and got myself together. I try to listen and support when I can even though we are miles and miles away from each other. He told me to call him back on Google duo, which is normal because we video chat several times throughout a week.

Before I called back, I noticed that he had left me 2 video messages on duo. I played the first one. He said things like “Thanks for being my friend... it was nice knowing you... nice meeting you... I enjoyed our time together.” I didn't bother listening to the second one and called him right back. He asked me how my weekend was and I asked him what was wrong, did something happen? He took these long pauses before he spoke, as if he couldn't talk. He said “This isn't fair to you; I shouldn't have woken you up like this.” I told him it was okay and again asked what was wrong. He said I shouldn't have called you. I asked why. He said: Because I'm probably going to die soon.

I asked him how did he know he was going to die soon, he said: Because I just took three bottles of pills. So... I've never been on the other end of a conversation like this. It took a few seconds to register what he said, and once I did, the panic inside of me slowly started to build. I asked him if he had called anyone before he called me and he said something along the lines of “There's not much you can do anyway.”

I ran into my roommate's room, demanded that we use his phone because this was an emergency. I asked him “Can you please call 911 and ask them to get in touch with the emergency line from my hometown because my friend just told me that he took three bottles of pills and I don't know if he's going to be okay!!” (At this point I'm crying hysterically by just speaking the words aloud.)

We got on the phone with emergency services, and they start asking me questions. I gave them my friend’s address, and the lady on the phone asked me to see if I could get him to tell me what kind of pills he took. He wouldn't tell me. Once they got all the details, they said that they would send somebody to check on my friend. I went back into my room to continue talking to him on Google duo. At this point it was hard for me to focus. He was talking about how he had attempted this three times earlier that day, how he still thinks the Creator makes no mistakes, and began frowning up and even saying that his stomach was hurting really bad and he was repeating himself because he could feel his words starting to slur. My roommate, who has been a mediator in these situations before, told me that it's best to talk about something else instead of what's going on right now. So, I tried to ask my friend how his weekend was, but I can't think of much else to say. The whole time I wondered what was taking the police so long, and it was harder to contain my anxiousness. Three bottles of pills had stuck in my head so I didn't know how much time we had!!

Then, my friend put his phone down and I heard what I assumed was the police finally knocking at the door. A few minutes passed and I didn't hear or see anything on the screen so I panicked and hung up. I tried calling back three times and got no answer. I ran back into my roommate's room, threw myself on his bed, and started crying hysterically. He rubbed my back and try to calm me down. I told him I couldn’t be calm! I was anxious and scared because I didn't know what was going on!!

Finally the police call us back. The officer says; “Yeah we're with your friend and he seems to be just fine. He doesn't appear to be intoxicated and said he is not having suicidal thoughts. Can you tell me what happened?” I am extremely confused. I don't know how it is that he could be okay, when minutes ago he was not. I told the officer everything, that he informed me that he took three bottles of pills, with some wine, and that I don't think he was okay. The officer told me that they have a series of questions that they have to ask, and if the individual answers the questions in a way that suggests that they are okay, they cannot admit them anywhere or take that person away. The officer assured me that he would ask the questions one more time and give me a call back to let me know what happened. When he called back it was the same thing. I couldn’t contain my frustration. I wanted to yell out “He is lying to y'all!!” but my roommate was sitting next to me and calmly told me to thank the officer. I did. The officer reminded me that you can't make people tell the truth, and if someone says that they're okay it is not his place to take away their freedom that way.

When the call ended, I sat on the bed with tears in my eyes. I was angry and confused. I didn't understand why he wasn't being honest. My roommate reminded me that usually, if someone wants to kill themselves, they would just do it without letting anybody know so that nobody can possibly intervene. Sometimes, and maybe in this case, it was a cry for help or a cry for attention. He told me that most likely my friend was okay, because 3 full bottles of pills, no matter what kind, would have had some type of physical effect on his body by now.

Even though I made sense of what my roommate told me, I was still in a state of worry because I had no idea what I just happened and still felt like my friend might be in danger. I tried calling him for the next 6 hours because somehow I kept thinking the worst. I just wanted a response from him... to know that he was okay and not possibly passed out somewhere. He finally texted me the words “I'm ok” later that night and I didn't say anything else.

I haven't spoken to my friend since then. I've moved through the day assuming that he's okay and doesn't want to be bothered right now. (He's the type of person who prefers to have space when he is going to darkness) However, what my roommate said caused me to think a little bit more about our friendship - how it formed, what fuels it, what keeps it going, and how we lean on each other. Many of our conversations revolve around physical intimacy with each other, and when he is having bad days I am there to listen and try to uplift him the best way that I can. When I on the other hand have a lot on my mind that I want to talk about, I cannot divert his attention away from his video games or social media in order for him to listen to me. I began to wonder if I fill some void for him of loneliness and sexual desire. I hope that we can have a check-in about this.

When I was a teenager, I had a best friend who suffered from depression. I had no real understanding of it back then, but as I got older I realized that she used her depression to emotionally manipulate me and whoever she was dating at the time into surrendering to her will, whenever she wanted. We are no longer close and much peace has been restored in my life as a result. I don't want to walk into another friendship like that. It is toxic for both parties, especially as I try to navigate through my own bouts of emotional instability. 

I have since talked to my therapist about this situation. She assured me that I did the right thing and that I shouldn't blame myself for how things were handled. Even though I haven't called him since yesterday, I do wish that we could talk, and hope that he is doing better. I am in a better place about this than I was yesterday but I am still thinking about the after effects. And to be honest, I am still a little upset about it.... Am I a bad friend for being angry with him? Am I wrong for not checking in with him today? Who is he not being honest with? Is this something he will do  again in the future? Is it selfish to want to discuss how this incident made me feel? Would appreciate any feedback or advice about this in my ask box or my messages.

**Please excuse typos. I typed this whole thing up in tumblr with emotion and fervor, then accidentally clicked “back” and lost the whole thing. I used talk-to-text to hastily re-tell the story and paste it back. It’s definitely not as great as the first draft but whatever.

[pseudonymfox]

Lay your love on me

Negan x Reader

Summary: Negan is your one and only love but you are scared that you’ll lose him...

Warnings: FLUFF, angst, language, negan being negan

A/N: I watched Mamma Mia a lot over the past days and somehow this idea came out of two songs “Lay your love on me” and “One of us” which is gonna be the Sequel to that. Also this is my first Negan one shot so please leave a comment. Always wanted to write for him but never really started ^^

Also I wrote this on my phone. Sorry if it’s not good or has any typos :(

Masterlist - Inspired by this Song

Negan is never gonna be that simple guy who finds his soulmate, his one and only, the girl he is supposed to fall in love with. Instead he got a bunch of women in black dresses, all locked in a room for him to pick one out and jump on his dick from here and then even after Lucille he couldn't really say that he is the guy for true love. After all here he is, longing after a girl who is the complete opposite from all of his wives, any women in the sanctuary and he even would say she means more to him than Lucille once did.

The moment he saw (Y/N) for the first time he knew that she is going to be the death for him. She looked so in peace as she picked flowers up at the fences, outside the sanctuary. He thought at first how she can be so gentle and lived through all of this shit that happened to make it til here but he got convinced otherwise as David stepped towards her with a smug smirk across his face. He reached his hand towards her ass but she was too quick. She took his arm and spinned him around and held him firmly. He couldn't hear her but she whispered something in ear and shoved him away, letting him fall on the ground. After that she just picked the flowers up and left like nothing happened.

Quickly he build the courage up to talk to her and asked her of course to be one of his wives, she just slapped him across his face and left. She denied again and again but he wasn't going to have it and finally after a long night and a few drinks they came closer. She wasn't his wife but something like a mistress for him. No one knew about it but anyone who had eyes could see their longing glances across the room or little winks and smirks towards each other. He spend less nights with his wives and more time instead with (Y/N).

I wasn't jealous before we met

Now every men I see is a potential threat

And I'm possessive, it isn't nice

You've heard me saying that smoking was my only vice

But now it isn't true

Now everything is new

And all I've learned has overturned

I beg of you.

It is already late as Negan waited for (Y/N). Normally she would wait for him in his room but never once until now he had to wait for her so he decided to get up again and look after her, slightly worried that something happened to her. The Saviors and his wives of course noticed when he doesn't show up in week or comes to late to meetings with messy hair and hickeys across his neck.

As he got into the hallway he saw you leaning against a wall with a man besides you with your hand on his shoulder. He wouldn't say that he is jealous but he didn't like to share at all or just see you next to these guys.

"Hey!!" he shouted towards you and the guy he recognize as Robin who often worked at the market. Both of you quickly took steps back.

"Don't you have to be somewhere Robin?"he snapped at him shoving him away from you.

"Y-Yes sir" Robin choked out still staring between him and (Y/N) like he is waiting for another sign.

"What the fuck are you waiting for? GO!" he said one last time and rolled his eyes as Robin quickly made his way into another direction.

"Really Negan? Was that necessary?" you began and crossed your arms over your chest.

Robin was just a good friend of yours who needed an advice. Nothing more but Negan already saw a threat in him.

"Why are you even hanging around with this fucking asshole? You know I don't like to share what is mine" he took you chin with his hand held you closer to him but you just shoved him away again, not having his attitude at this moment.

"I'm not yours and he is just a friend. Which you knew if you would listen to me for a damn minute."

"Oh please! I could his eyes all over your body" Negan scoffed and you are sure that others would hear your argument but you didn't really care at this moment because it wouldn't matter if he saw you talking with a girl or a men. He would get extremely jealous if you would be near any other person. But he thinks that it ok for you that he has a room full of his wives.

"I don't think so.." you just simply replied because you know something that he doesn't but he had to overreact again.

"How are you so sure about it? I could hear his thoughts about shoving his-"

"He is not interested in women! Robin just needed advice.." You cut him off and snapped at him. He looked slightly shocked and didn't replied at first so you just decides to head back to your room but his arm held you already back.

"Sorry...I didn't know" he mumbled and looked into your eyes, holding you still tightly in his arms.

"Fuck you Negan! You always overreact when I am around my friends and I am not your wife! I can still do whatever I want!" You said and shoved his hands away that held your face in between for a few moments.

"No I mean it. Fuck you Negan!" you replied again and you wanted to give in at the way he looks at you and knew that you couldn't hold it back any longer but at least you tried a little longer.

"And I fucking said when and where?" he inched closer to you. So close that you could feel his hot breath against your skin. You couldn't hold back anymore so leaned in and just as you lips touched lightly, he pulled away and chuckled loudly as you pouted and tried pulling him back. Negan just crouched down and threw you over his shoulder. You giggled as he slapped you on your ass and began to walk back to his room where you gonna have a lot of fun.

Don't go wasting your emotions

Lay all your love on me

It was like shooting a sitting duck

A little small talk, a smile and baby I was stuck

I still don't know what you've done with me

A grown-up woman should never fall so easily

I feel a kind of fear

When I don't have you near

Unsatisfied, I skip my pride

I beg you dear

As Negan first approached you it was like a shock since he never talked to you or even noticed you. You thought that you did something wrong or broke one of his precious rules but it wasn't anything like that he asked you to marry him and out of a instinct you slapped him. For a second you thought that you would never see the daylight again afterwards he probably just got more turned on.

He tried again and again to seduce you with gifts and extra points but you denied everytime. As you first heard of his wives you promised yourself that you never ever going to be one if these bitches. After the fist few weeks of him showing up at your work, giving you days off or just getting on your nerves and following you around the sanctuary. With that followed small talk, long conversations and..you well you found yourself falling for him. Actually both of you did.

Then after a date he set up you spend the night together and then another and another.

Suddenly you felt excited when he got back from meetings, a run or long work days. He was your best friend and lover. You had no idea what he felt for you or he still had sex with his wives but you had a feeling that this was something special.

Don't go wasting your emotion

Lay all your love on me

Don't go sharing your devotion

Lay all your love on me

Another night were you laid just as the past few days in his bed, with your head on his shoulder and your naked bodys after a steamy night as close as possible. You loved it. No disturbings, no rushing or people asking for his appearance. Just the two of you and the rest of the world is shut down for a few intimate moments.

Never once in your life you had a relationship with someone like Negan, not even with older men but now everything is just different. Every other boyfriend or lover you had felt almost not real or childish. You also often thought about how he felt, you don’t think that he will ever drop his wives for you no matter how much you wanted him for yourself. Also about the war with Rick and his group. You really believed that he can win the war but still there is pretty big chance that he didn’t. He could die and you would stand there alone.

“What is going through your pretty little head?“ he asked as you seemed like you got lost in thoughts again. You could feel his heartbeat, that helped to concentrate on the moment instead of the war or losing him.

“Nothing..“ you lied.

“Stop lying to me. I know you for to fucking long to know when you are lying.“ he said calmly. The only light came from the moon through the windows as you looked around Negan’s bedroom.

“How?” you replied wanting to know why he always knew what you were thinking about. He just sighed and began to draw patterns on your shoulder and down your arm before he continued.

“Because everytime you lie or trying to say something you get awfully silent, can’t keep eye contact and look around the room like your lost in your world“ he explained to you.

“I just..-I guess I am scared“ you stuttered out. You didn’t want to look so vulnerable in front of him like this but the thoughts just kept running around your thoughts, not leaving you alone and keeping you awake at night.

“-scared of losing you.“ you added, tears welling up in your eyes but you closed your eyes and held a little tighter onto him.

“You shouldn’t be. I already told you that I don’t die that easily.“ he chuckled lightly, trying to soothe you.

“I know but you already disappeared as Rick showed up here or after you are supposed to drive to hilltop..and I just can’t help it. I don’t want to lose you.“ you managed to say before your voice started to stutter, your emotions overcoming you.

“I promise you that I come back” he told you firmly and kissed your temple.

It did help but you still had a weird feeling about everything and your blood would just run cold as you thought about it again.

  I've had a few little love affairs

They didn't last very long and they've been pretty scarce

I used to think that was sensible

It makes the truth even more incomprehensible

'Cause everything is new

And everything

And all I've learned has overturned

What can I do

You thought over the past weeks about these three little words a lot. Moments came where you wanted to say it came often but you never did because you are scared. Scared of losing him, of him not feeling the same or just that he'll break this off. How could you even think that he'll say it back. Negan is after all not that type of guy who confesses his love towards someone.

You had your fights and the wives are still there too. You didn't even know if he spends still time with them but you are constantly around him so you didn't really thought that. If you would bring that subject up you would be pretty sure that he gets mad even if you had to be the one who should be mad. That was another sign for you that he didn't feel the same for you.

The day went by and this time you came in a little later. All you needed was a shower and sleep. You expected him to be already asleep or not even there yet. He would often just sleep for a few hours before something happened or he was requested somewhere. So of course you are shocked as you came into his room to find the room lighten up with candles and Negan standing at the vinyl recorder. Just as he was planning this, the romantic and slow music started playing and he turned around to you with a grin on his face.

“What is going on?“ you stepped forward with a tired smiled as he got closer too and put his hands on your waist already starting sway slightly.

“Just thought that we needed more time for us since I am a little occupied with everything“ he smirked and looked deeply into your eyes. 

“I should maybe take a shower. I look like shit“ you chuckled and sighed.

“You are fucking perfect just like this.“ he leaned forward and kissed you softly on your lips. It is so different to what he usually likes. It was short but still very soft and sweet instead of rough and all about teeth and tongue. You laid your hands on his chest and the two of you began to just sway around the room, staring into each other eyes. The music stopped and he pecked your lips another time.

“I love you” you brought out without even thinking about it. You mentally cursed yourself and thought that everything you build up is now gone to shit.

“What?“ he stepped away from you and cocked an eyebrow at you. His face is gone white and you never saw this shocked before. Your stomach turned and just hoped for the best. You opened your mouth to say something but nothing came out. You just couldn’t think of anything to say. You didn’t want to apologize for what you felt for him and neither wanted you to take it back.

“I think you should go now“ he mumbled after an uncomfortable long silence. You eyes shot wide open and looked confused to him. Your biggest nightmare just became reality.

“Go right fucking now!“ he said now more loudly. He strolled over to you and pushed you towards the door. You began to panick and didn’t even know how to react on what just happened.

“Negan I-.“

“No! Just go (Y/N)....please“ he cut you off and you waited a second longer. Your tears already starting to flow down your flushed cheeks. You just turned around the hallway and began to walk back to your room which you haven’t really visited over the last time.

Everything you were scared off now just became reality. Tomorrow was the big day and you didn’t know it yet but tomorrow you would lose him. You would lose the war.

 Don't go wasting your emotion

Lay all your love on me

Don't go sharing your devotion

Lay all your love on me

>>Next Part

Feedback appreciated!

xoxo Sophie

Tags(If you want to be added or removed from the taglist let me know):

(Those with strike through didn’t work sorry)

@bitchsike1 / @escapetheshackles / @dashlilymark

[lnewden]

Jane & Kurt drabble

Okay so this is my first ever fic!!  So I’m extremely scared to post this ahhhhh, sorry about all the typos there probably are - writing isn’t my strong point. It’s set after 3x11 by the way, hope you enjoy :) I’ll put it under the break :

They had been driving in silence for most of the journey back from the hospital, not uncomfortable silence though, they were just exhausted from the past few days and needed some time to just think to themselves.

Jane was the first to break the silence, “I need to just grab a few things from the apartment if thats oka-“

“Jane,” Kurt interrupted as he turned to look at her , “you don’t need to stay at the hotel.” he said, softly. Jane briefly looked up at him and sighed.

“I think it would be best for us if I do” she replied, looking back down again. Kurt’s heart sunk but  he knew he should let Jane do what she wanted so he just nodded in response. They carried on sitting in silence for a little longer, nearing the apartment.

She broke the silence again, “Kurt?” Jane asked quietly, fidgeting with her hands. He turned to look at her, questioningly.

“What are we going to do?”

They both paused for a moment and Kurt looked into Jane’s eyes, desperately thinking of a response. He then frowned and gently shook his head.

 “I don’t know, Jane,” he whispered. He really didn’t know. He wanted Jane to come home but he knew their relationship needed repairing. Things couldn’t just go back to normal now that Avery was alive. Jane felt tears building up in her eyes. She had begun to realise how much she had screwed up, well, they both had, but she had let her anger take the better of her and it all landed onto Kurt, unfairly. And yet he still loved her. He would still wait for her, as long as it took, despite everything. What did she do to deserve him? She thought to herself.

She started fumbling with her hands again, missing the feeling of her wedding ring on her finger.

“Kurt, I..” she paused, letting out a breath. “What?” Kurt questioned, calmly. “I still..” she let out another long breath, “I still love you, you know that, right?”, she couldn’t stop a tear from trickling down her cheek.  

Kurt felt his eyes well up too, and thought for a moment before he responded, “No,” he said, unexpectedly, “I didn’t know,”. More tears pricked at her eyes, “I’m so sorry for everything, I was angry, and I should have—” “We both should have done a lot of things, Jane” he interrupted, keeping his gentle tone.

They soon arrived at their apartment, both getting out of the car and carrying their bags into the entrance. Kurt fumbled in his pocked to grab his keys and opened the door, letting Jane go through before him. They made their way to his door and Jane grabbed her keys to open it. “You brought your keys” he said, without thinking. “Of course I did” she replied, with a confused look on her face. He realised strangeness of his comment. They both stumbled into the apartment, dropping  their heavy bags on the floor. Kurt slowly closed the door behind them.

Being back felt so familiar yet so strange to Jane, she had missed being at home so much but she couldn’t stop the memories of the last time they were here, filling her mind: 

‘If I stayed any longer I would have died too.’, ‘Then you should have stayed.’ 

Her heart shattered into a million pieces as she was reminded of her harsh words towards her husband. Then she saw it, glistening on the tabletop, and she turned back around to look at Kurt, he looked just as broken, just as drained as she did. 

She knew he had noticed it too, the most obvious thing in the room, but neither of them said a word. She so desperately wanted to put it back on, to hug him, kiss him, hold him tight and never let go, but she knew that now wasn’t the time, she didn’t know where they stood, what there relationship was anymore, they needed time to heal.

“Im just gonna um..— go and get my things“ “Sure” he said forcing a gentle, reassuring smile on his face as he watched her wander down the hallway to their bedroom.

“Oh, do you want a drink?” He exclaimed, raising his voice so she could hear. “Please,” she replied as she grabbed more of her clothes from the drawers, quickly stuffing them into her bag, discreetly grabbing one of Kurt’s cosy navy t-shirts which she had forgotten to take the first time.. She then walked back into the living room where he was settled on the couch, two glasses of bourbon poured out in front of him on the coffee table. She went and sat down next to him, surprisingly closer than he expected and leaned forward to take her drink from the coffee table.

“We should probably talk,” she whispered, as she took a small sip of her drink.

They both turned towards each other. Their faces were so close she could almost feel him breathing onto her. 

“I’m too tired, Jane, can we talk tomorrow?”

She felt a wave of sadness flow over her. “Okay then,” she said mumbled softly as she felt herself shuffling slightly closer to him. Kurt looked down at her hands on her knees which were trembling slightly. Even though he remembered the last time she flinched at his touch, he gently placed one of his hands on top of hers, rubbing his thumb gently over the top. Her breathing began to even out and he could sense that his touch was soothing her. Jane then took this precious moment to carefully lean her head onto his shoulder and snuggle closer to him, praying that he would allow her to feel his comfort. He did, carefully snaking his other arm around her waist. “It will be okay,” he whispered, softly, as he could feel her tears dripping onto his shoulder, through his shirt. 

She let out a quiet sob.

“Please don’t cry.” he whispered, as he gently moved his arm up and down her side. She couldn’t help the tears which continued to trickled down her cheeks onto his shirt. “Im so— sorry, Kurt” she choked out as he continued rubbing his hand up and down her side, pulling her closer towards him. “Shhhhh,” he whispered, intertwining his hand with hers, as she nuzzled even closer to him. 

Eventually her tears began to fade away as they carried on sitting there in silence, making the most of every second, just enjoying warmth and comfort of being in each others arms again. Things were still not repaired between them, it would take a while — they could still feel the pain buried deep inside of each other, but in that moment, they both knew that the only way they could heal is by slowly, finding their way back to each other - exactly where they belonged.

[stellar-imagines]

SCENARIO REQUEST: ❝aggressive encouragement.❞

[ Fandom: Kimetsu no Yaiba ] [ Characters: Hashibira Inosuke ]

「Scenario of Inosuke who comforts an insecure reader in the most aggressive ways.」

HASHIBIRA INOSUKE

Inosuke was raised by boars, everyone knows that. It was surprising to you but when you studied his mannerisms, it became obvious that his behavior was a bit weird. He possessed little understanding of normal human interaction. When you first approached him, he was aggressive and tried attacking you but was held back by Tanjirou. It was obvious that he wasn't used to kindness seeing as how odd he reacted when you and Tanjirou showed generosity. It wasn't long until he develop feelings of friendship towards you like how he warmed up to Tanjirou and Zenitsu. There weren't much female demon slayers at their level so having someone like you was like a breath of fresh air. The four of you were often sent on missions together so you all knew each other better than anyone else.

You were there to keep him in check because of how he acts during battle. He tends to charge straight ahead without putting too much thought into his strategy, often overestimating his own abilities. This often led to you or Tanijrou scolding him for rushing in without any plan. Inosuke admits out loud that he has mixed feelings towards you, not the normal kind. When he says mixed, he means a lot of feelings that he doesn't really understand. Tanjirou and Zenitsu had to step in to help the boar boy understand the feelings he has towards you. 

"Hey! Aren't you going to eat!?" Inosuke spotted you picking at your food. The plate was almost empty, only a quarter of the rice left untouched and some of the vegetable kakiage sitting on the side plates. You shook your head and pushed your tray to his side, offering him your leftovers. He seemed pretty happy with having more food to eat while you sat by, watching him finish off whatever you left.

"[First Name], you've been eating less. Are you not hungry?" Tanjirou noticed it earlier that you haven't been eating a bit less than usual. You waved it off, telling him that you're not that hungry. However, after all that training session to strengthen your body, you needed to refuel your body with food.

After a long day of training, running around and working on your body endurance, everyone was eager for some rest. On the other hand, you were still at the yard of the Butterfly Estate, swinging at your blade. You didn't do any simple training either, you were going all out, praciting your Total Concentration. Inhaling the maximum amount of oxygen within a specific breath pattern to raise their physical and mental strength to your utmost limits. After all that harsh training, he was pretty amazed that you were still practicing all on your own. Seeing you swinging at your Nichirin blade got him going to. 

Before you even realized it, he was yelling about how he can do whatever you're doing. Inosuke was already swinging at his sword wildly while laughing maniacally. It wasn't long until the two of you stopped swinging. Sweat glistened along the side of your face, a tired gleam in your eyes. He didn't understand why you were pushing yourself, you weren't that bad during training and it was obvious that you were pushing yourself. 

"Why are you training so much?" Inosuke asked, rising from his position abruptly and glancing at you. It was hard to tell what he was thinking because it was hidden by his boar mask. He seemed a bit agitated like usual which was nothing unusual to anyone.

"Don't tell me you're trying to get better!? Of course you can't be get better than me! I'm clearly the better one!" the boy boasted loudly, laughing with his hands on his hips as he gazed at you. There was something about the way he expressed himself that made you feel a bit at ease. You sat down by the engawa while Inosuke stood at the yard, looking extremely proud of himself.

You had been training your techniques a lot and you were able to use Total Concentration for 24 hours straight so you had improved vastly from when you passed the entrance exam. But it wasn't only you, everyone around you was improving at a very fast pace and you were starting to get left behind. You didn't want to admit it out loud but you were quite insecure, over a few things. However, that wasn't the only reason. After missions, you'd get injuries, some deep enough to leave scars. So it's not only that you were insecure of your abilities but also your body image.

"Well, that's not the only thing....." you said. 

“So why? Is it because that your body isn't as flexible as mine!? Right?!" Inosuke pointed at himself proudly, seemingly a bit excited to show off how flexible his body truly was. You knew he was spouting whatever same to his mind but you were shocked to hear him assume something that was close. He seemed to notice a change in your expression and instantly knew that he's right.

Zenitsu always boasted about how girls are and practically drilled into the mountain boy everything about girls. Tanjirou taught him about delicacy so he knew that girls have a few topics that they're quite sensitive with. Even so, with that information, Inosuke wasn't able to act because he has no idea what to do. He was a straightforward and honest guy, so he decided to be honest and tell you how he truly feels about you.

"But what's wrong with it?

"You're hard-working! Having scars are pretty cool, you know! That a sign of strength, you're strong! It's pretty cool!" there was a visible lack in his vocabulary but despite that, you were able to hear how honest he is. Deep inside, you have a feeling that tells you Inosuke might not understand how you feel and just say whatever he thinks. In a way, it made you feel better.

"Really? I don't think I am though." you replied.

"Hah!? You think I'm lying, don't you!? You think you're better at this game!?" Inosuke seemed a bit frustrated, much to your surprise.

"It's not like that Inosuke―"

"What's wrong with having scars!? They're cool! What's wrong with having an imperfect body!? I just don't understand! You look nice! You have a nice face! Your eyes are pretty, your skin is soft and you smell good every time you stand next to me!" he aggressively pointed at you, getting close to your face. You didn't know what to say, Inosuke was not the type to lie about his feelings and thoughts. He was being genuine. You found yourself smiling at the mountain boy who clearly had no idea how much his words affected you.

"Thank you, Inosuke." you stepped closer and pecked the side of his boar mask. He was a blushing mess and his body felt oddly light at the sight of your smiling face. Inosuke was unable to respond properly but he had the sudden urge to hold you right now.

And so he did. Tackling you to the ground and engulfing you in one of the most awkward hugs in your entire life.

Total: 1196 words Published: 23.03.2020

Thank you for requesting! *｡٩(ˊᗜˋ*)و*｡ Inosuke is just too cute for me uwu We hope that he’s not too out of character. Sorry to make you wait, anon. ― author Lou

Thank you for requesting! Inosuke is one of the most interesting characters to write for to be honest. Sorry to make you wait. ― author Natsuki

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Please do not mind the grammar mistakes and typos.