#details in tags bc i hate to openly hate on things

[overelegantstranger]

been reading a run of horror/thriller novels lately. i've specifically been looking for ones that aren't too intense, ones that are a bit generic or not intended to be especially earthshattering. and i've been largely enjoying it, but, for anyone else who also enjoys reading horror/supernaturaly thrillers, i just wanna stake a quick red flag over J. H. Markert's The Nightmare Man. Not gonna say "don't read". however. AM going to say two things: thought it was a first novel until i saw the six other titles at the back; was astonished at the amount of gratuitous ableism throughout. Also felt it was a bit racist and sexist but not in an overt way, in a nagging uncomfy way.

[miseria-fortes-viros]

(brings microphone to your face) tell us abt ur au!!!! whatever you're willing to share, i love hearing abt wips.

OOHOOHOO OK!! so i have talked abt this before but i don’t think i have a tag for it however im going to go back thru and tag ALL of it bc well. i like all of my things in one place. ANYWAY. i’m going to put this under a cut bc it will be LONG because i cannot help myself ever. so, i present: trc rival bands au!

this is the pinterest board i’ve made for the au that i cannot stop adding to. i’m refraining from sharing my spotify playlists because uh. those are a major part of the story and i don’t want to take that away from it 😭 BUT trust me they are SO good. im obsessed.

anyway. rival bands au LETS GO!!

gansey, ronan, henry, and noah make up the (pop punk?/alt rock?) band Kings of Henrietta.

ronan plays lead guitar. he’s the son of legendary irish rockstar niall lynch and also ex lead guitarist of the boyband the lynch brothers. he plays a seven-string ibanez xiphos in black flat (VERY sexy guitar VERY difficult). its name is chainsaw. he has perfect pitch. he’s also very, very irish

gansey’s lead vocals and rhythm guitar. he grew up hollywood royalty but was never really interested in acting, just did it because it was expected of him. his exodus from the film industry in order to be in a band was originally widely considered a long shot but now. well. one of the most famous bands in the world and all that. he plays an obnoxiously orange gretsch jet that fans have dubbed “the pig”.

henry’s bass and backup vocals. he’s the heir to two tech fortunes but ran off to be a musician and was a solo artist for a few years before the formation of KOH (think yungblud). he has a classic rocker haircut, he’s openly queer, he’s a weirdgirl fashion icon. he plays a custom made electric blue fender precision with lightning detailing. he calls it “madonna” but this name has yet to catch on

noah plays drums (and also provides vocals on occasion if the occasion is screaming). his parents are music producers, his sister adele is also in the industry. he breaks at least one drum stick per show and tosses it into the pit. hardcore fans can and will fight for it.

they are SO fucking famous. like taylor swift 95m monthly spotify listeners famous. like people recognize ronan just from his hair like eminem famous. about to leave on one of the longest world tours ever famous. it is INSANE how famous they are.

they all met at aglionby and often played together but didn’t form a band until after niall lynch’s murder and the disbanding of the lynch brothers. there’s a few years gap between graduating aglionby and the formation of KOH

some circles still believe ronan killed his own father however they are very few and far between. WHATEVER

blue grew up in a house full of musicians. she can play pretty much anything under the sun but prefers drums and guitar. she went to juilliard on scholarship, which is where she met adam

adam did not grow up playing music with his family. he grew up learning it in secret. he cannot play everything however he is a VERY quick learner out of sheer willpower. he graduated high school as valedictorian and immediately got the fuck out of there to go to juilliard (also on scholarship). he and blue were inseparable almost immediately

they moved in together after graduation and blue took him home to henrietta when the rent started to get a little too high. they officially formed their band page of wands in blue’s room at 300 fox way

“page of wands” merges both of their symbolic tarot cards together (page of cups + magician). did i mention blue was raised pagan? she was. as to be expected. anyways.

virtually unknown indie rock band page of wands posts a cover of a KOH song. they do not expect KOH to see it. they also do not expect KOH to return the favor in front of tens of thousands of people. KOH does it anyways. because gansey is ENAMORED. he is SO FAR GONE.

blue hates this. she hates it so much. unfortunately POW’s sudden success is now irreversibly tied to KOH and there’s nothing she can do about it. or is there

their record labels agree to a rivalry. success! this is what she wanted

except it’s not. but she doesn’t know why

cue enemies to lovers. and long distance pining. mutual destruction. the entire music industry watching this all unfold. bluesey. pynch. way too many spotify links. you get the picture

guys i literally CANNOT stop thinking about this i don’t know what to do. what do i do. i am so lost. please help me

[shirogane-oushirou]

[cw mentions of ableism. talking / venting about the sharing vs non-sharing shit (i do not lean towards supporting one "side" over the other); starts out relatively neutral-toned but i start to sound frustrated part way through. i also have a more personal ramble at the very end that has a separate cw list. it's also long... don't feel obligated to read. i just needed to say things and be Done with it.]

man. i'm ready for all of the sharing vs non-sharing back and forths to stop.

to be clear: this isn't some "i'm above this argument" thing. on the contrary; i completely see where both "sides" are coming from! i simply mean it shouldn't be so difficult for a select few shit-stirrers to Get that selfshipping is a personal thing, and we should be able to ship in whatever way makes us most comfortable.

if someone is non-sharing, they should be allowed to create those boundaries without being harassed or called "immature" or "delusional" by sharing people. beyond how supremely ableist that is, nobody has the right to say they can't view their f/os in a certain way, no matter if other people don't understand those feelings.

if someone is sharing, they should be allowed to share their feelings for a character openly with other sharing people without being sent hate from non-sharing people who think they're "loose" or who want to be their f/o's "one and only". shaming people for being open to sharing is fucked from multiple "sexual / romantic purity" and "anti poly-[sexual / romantic / platonic] relationships" angles, and nobody has the right to claim sole and total ownership over a character they did not make.

and yet, every couple of weeks, we get posts from a vocal minority making a huge fuss over "the other side", when it's just a vocal minority FROM that other side ALSO making a fuss. and then those vague posts leave their intended orbit and cause more mis-worded posts and misunderstandings and off-the-cuff bigoted statements, and the cycle starts again.

we should theoretically be able to respect each other while focusing that energy on, oh i dunno, chasing harassers out of the community? getting selfshippers who aren't part of a specific marginalized group to help selfshippers from that group when they're harassed, maybe?? especially when the sharing vs non-sharing Thing very often coincides with bigotry; people who are harassing others tend to not just stop at being petty or mean, they make it personal.

and -- not as important but a nice little bonus -- i would think that working towards a community that's more safe for everyone in it would also "coincidentally" (/s) get rid of the shit-stirrers, whether because they were kicked out or because they realized what they were doing and grew as people.

---

[cw ableism, vague death ideation, non-physical self harm mention]

i was originally gonna put this bit in the tags, but i think i should put it under the cut bc it's a little personal + it got too long.

also, i try to stay in my lane and not discuss details about delusions or how to approach them -- i've only experienced them a couple of times, so i'm not going to claim to know much about them -- so if i've overstepped, PLEASE let me know and i'll edit or remove anything i've misspoken about.

but coming from someone who went too deep into selfshipping in the past and worries about the mental health of people who do: It's None Of Your Business!!

delusions aren't morally "bad" or "wrong". holding deep feelings abt a character isn't inherently delusion-based and also isn't morally "bad" or "wrong". and neither of those is the same as -- speaking from experience (above content warnings come into play here) -- being obsessed with a character to the point that you self-isolate and emotionally self harm because you wish so badly that the character was real and you believe there isn't a point to life if you'll never meet that character... and this is also not inherently delusion-based and ALSO not morally "bad" or "wrong".

these separate things -- delusions, deep feelings, and unhealthy obsession -- CAN intersect but just as often don't. none are immoral, and all are deserving of being approached with compassion and respect, in whatever way is most appropriate.

negative, harmful ACTIONS that some people take in these states are worth bringing up to them when it's safe to do so, depending on the details of their situation, but the states themselves don't have any moral weight. ie, if someone's harassing others for sharing their f/o because they're in a dark, obsessive place, that is a morally negative ACTION, not a morally negative mental state. they need to take responsibility for harm they've CAUSED, not for what they're experiencing internally.

but if you're calling people "immature" or "delusional" as an insult, something tells me you're not really considering that! whether through malice or just a lack of compassion, you don't see worth in how another person approaches this community.

you aren't better for thinking of a character a certain way, and neither is the person you're being ableist towards. if no harm is being done to you or others, you're just being a dick for the sake of being a dick. listen to other people, learn, and do better.

if you think someone is genuinely in a bad mental place because of selfshipping (wrt isolating and self harm), approach them as another human being. meet them where they're at. don't patronize them, don't call them "delusional", treat them like someone who has their own thoughts and values.

they may want help, or they may not, and you have to respect them for their choice no matter what YOU think is right. there is no truly right way to approach someone who's in a dark place, but you can at least avoid saying things that FOR SURE will make them feel talked down to, belittled, or shamed. if they aren't ready now, maybe they will be ready for help in the future, and shutting them down will make them less likely to seek that help.

(i was also going to put THIS in the tags but i should probably put it here: when i say 'learn and change' i mean it as a positive. people have the capacity to learn and grow and become better; if you've said something in all of this that can be read as harmful... consider why it's harmful and why you said it.

you aren't the same person you were a year ago. 5yrs ago. 10yrs ago. you have grown and you will continue to grow. but if you can be more aware of it and grow more purposefully and consciously? all the better.)

[sunshinemarauders]

Sexist Experiences in the Marauders Fandom

These anonymous submissions come from a survey I published several weeks ago where I asked for fans in the Marauders fandom to share their experiences with me. I was overwhelmed with the results, and this is, in their own words, some of the submissions I was sent.

There was a situation on TikTok where a popular marauders creator told people who made transfem Sirius content to block him or comment so he can block them because it made him dysphoric, and while it wasn’t his intention, it made a space where people felt comfortable being wildly transmisogynistic towards the headcanon and creators

Lots of sexism towards female characters and I've been called misogynistic slurs like bitch and c****

Even in this form, there is explicit fetishization of MLM relationships over WLW. That is the biggest thing I have seen, besides people hating Lily because she is an AFAB character shipped with James at the height of Jegulus.

It's mostly just fans ignoring/villainizing female characters in the fandom in order to elevate male characters. I haven't really seen sexism directed towards the fans, just the characters.

I was about to answer this question before again X) Anyway, there's some sort of misogyny I "experienced" indeed. Not directly as I said, but more because I write fanfiction, and so I see the misogyny in the fanfiction system (and I saw no one talking about it). When you want to tag for a fic with a wlw ship, the tags are... barely existent. The "[character] is a Little Shit", or "[character] needs a Hug" (you know, these types of tags), to quote the famous ones, they are sometimes not even a thing for the women. It really shows I think a lack of presence and development of the women characters. It is very hard to tag women in fanfictions (here I'm talking mostly about ao3, which has the most developed tagging system I believe). That's not it, but this is more subjective, maybe: the amount of hits are NOT the same. That's crazy. For an AU I wrote, a series of one shots, so the same universe, the same tags (it was a spy AU and basically, the one shot is like a slice of life, telling about a mission, it's a details but so you'll understand better), the same concept, the same things (more or less) happening, the same length... etc (you get it), well for all this, I'll have 1K hits for the boys, and barely 100 for the women. It's not even about the kudos, it's really ... how people are not really willing to click on fics with only women :/ I've seen this on a lot of fics about women (them having less visibility), and I'm sure some other writers could agree on this. (sorry I really ranted X) I wanted to give details).

People saying the girls being erased is okay Bc they’re girls

the treatment of wlw characters and ships in this fandom have been to ignore or hate on them and as a lesbian it quite annoys me.

I'm not sure if your question also applies towards characters, but if it does, yes. So many m/m fics (especially Jegulus) will villainize the women in the story to elevate the men and get them together.

i’ve never seen outright sexism but the female characters are really undervalued and some fans are happy to focus on only the male characters and openly hate on the female ones

A fan was saying "shut up nobody care about them" when a fan was complaining there are barely any headcanons about the girls in a certain tik tok account

I once read a post from an old marauder fan who was basically saying trash about the new generation of marauders fans, about the «new » characters like the girls, saying that the true original story was only about the 4 boys marauders fighting for the war and that the others were shit.

I’ve been aware of fans being sexist towards other fans but also tending to be like sexist when it comes to the girls in the marauders era and essentially ignoring or ‘bashing’ the sapphic/wlw ships

There’s a lot of hate towards Lily regarding Jegulus. I’m also not too sure if this is considered sexist or not but some view Tonks as simply a surrogate for Remus and Sirius.

I’ve seen some nasty comments about lily being a bad mother or like demonizing her for having other interests other than just raising Harry

General underrepresentation of women, blaming Lily for being “in the way” of Jegulus and having her as nothing but a surrogate to Harry

Just a preference to the male ships and hating on the female characters for no reason

People have a very hard time with the girls characters and giving them value outside of their relationships with the male characters ex: making likely out to be a villain when Jegulus started getting popular

I think a great example is people tearing down Lily to allow for Jegulus. Similarly, I've seen tons of stories that play into sexist and toxic stereotypes, like giving the Marauders toxic masculinity traits and glorifying them. The ever-present fat phobia (that is everywhere, not just HP or Marauders fandom) is heavily rooted in sexism as well.

[falinscloaca]

10s dead 100s injured the lesbian ship tag you follow got m/f fanart foisted onto your dash because the fanart comes along with estrangement/unrequitement sadstuck for the girl involved and the girl uninvolved

[stargazypie]

I was tagged by the wonderful @goatmilkoatmilk to talk about the MASH characters I most relate to! this was fun but also very embarrassing to write, the mortifying ordeal etc, so feel free to not read it~

hawkeye: I think everyone sees a bit of themselves in hawkeye or hawkeye in themselves tbh, which as someone else said is a sign of a good protagonist, but does make me feel self-conscious about listing him So I'm sorry if this seems like a cop-out, especially since I don't think other people would necessarily hawkcode me; I feel like I project quite a different image a lot of the time? But without getting too tldr I relate most to hawkeye's strength of feeling- he feels emotions VERY strongly and is aware of them all, he can't escape from how he feels, so he laughs with absolute joy and sings out loud but also cries openly and snarls and snaps at people he hates. He also has a huge amount of love to give, both romantic and otherwise, and often not the most advisedly. Again without getting too tldr - because there are lots of things I relate to in him that I don’t want to get into detail on - we also share a poor self image and a nagging dread of failure and of disappointing people/not being good enough, and of being left alone - and Hawkeye does always seem very alone, especially when he’s not with BJ or when they fight. We also both tend to fall back on humour in a tense situation, and have a tendency to drop ourselves into the “keeping everyone going” role - a touch of martyr complex too perhaps - but underneath there's a lot of despairing anger which can be a bit harmful when vented. On that more negative side we're both sore losers who have to get the last word, somewhat controlling leaders at work, very bad at taking orders and capable of being extremely annoying in a bratty way 😅

margaret: externally I think I am more like margaret to people, and perhaps I used to be more like her; I was always a rule follower at school where the rules suited me, and very focused on success in my studies the way margaret is obsessed with advancement in her career (as a source of validation too bc I always felt it was the only thing I was any good at). I was also a very bossy child though I like to feel I've improved on that gradually... and like margaret I also found it difficult historically to make friends. I think my most margaret-like trait is probably an explosive temper unfortunately - and more generally a tendency to put up a spiky exterior when things aren’t going my way or I feel anxious or uncertain... plus some specifics of her approach to romantic relationships that hit a bit close to home.

charles: on a surface level a lot of what I do is very charles-coded! I’m a college rat and a musician after all, and I would absolutely cry if someone asked to play Mule Train on my record player (jesus BJ). Of course I dont think I’m a bigot, which distances me from charles a bit (hopefully), but I do relate a lot to how art touches him very deeply and how much he really wants to share that feeling with others.

tagging mashtuals @reajeasa and @false-dawn <3

[ajwamiju-archives]

Rules for my blog

This is a long post but it is a post for detailed rules

💧 Updated age interaction: I wish for minors to NOT interact with my blog or at least any NSFW content that I will post as I have a lot of it planned. I may make exceptions for interactions when it comes to commissions, but I will be much stricter about selling my products to minors.

💧My multi chapter fics will most probably have a smut chapter in them (not always). I will try my hardest to make it a skipable chapter so readers won't be too confused (As in pwp lmao). I can't stop anyone from reading it, but if you're a minor, at least try not to make your presence known to me.

💧A few of my planned fics will have dark themes in them. Please read the tags and make sure you are comfortable with viewing. I don't mind if you decide to skip as long as you're comfortable.

💧Hopefully I will be able to take requests and commissions one day! But there are things I will not write which are: Big age gaps (Dilf trope/milf trope) the maximum age gap I'm willing to write is 4 years (4 years is also kinda toeing the line), explicit non-con, daddy/mommy kink, hard bondage, watersports, scat, incest (in any case I open NSFW requests), and paedophilia or necrophilia.

💧People who are here to spread hate are not welcome. I don't care if you've had a bad experience with a certain person from a certain group, that does not excuse you hating the whole community because of what one or two people did unless the community's main purpose is already fucked up from the get-go.

💧If you dislike or hate children it's fine, but please do not openly hate or dislike them because I hope to post a lot of family-related fics (yes even the not so good parts about kids). Comments like "This is why I hate children" or "Just throw the baby out the plane" are not welcome. (You are however, free to call them names, does not indicate much bc those lil idiots probably don't know what those mean).

💧Please be a bit patient with me when sending asks, comments, or DMs. I get nervous when someone I don't/barely know interacts with me and I need some time to fully process and formulate answers. It may take a few minutes or maybe even hours for me to answer, but I will try to answer all comments, asks, or DMs I receive.

💧It has come to my attention that bullying from anonymous asks is far more common than I expected. I opened anonymous asks so people with horrible anxiety can have an easier time interacting with me as I also struggle with said fact. If I ever get (god forbid) overwhelming hate, I will close anonymous asks for the time being.

For now these are all the rules for my blog, but remember, it can always change depending on how it goes from here. You can ask for further explanations about my rules through the comments or ask, just not a 'why' question.

[altcvnningham]

1, 3, 5, 15, 18 and 20 😳😳😳😳

thank you for the ask!!! (also superior url omg 👁👄👁🤲🏻)

also my answers here are suuuuper long, because i’m a rambling idiot who’s way too involved in my OC’s. so uhhhh sorry in advance,,,,,

1. what radio station(s) do you listen to?

Vana’s a Samurai stan. She wishes she wasn’t. But, y’know, Morro Rock it is. Once upon a time when she was an even angrier teen, though, she’d listen to shit just like Ritual FM.

(My music taste is all over the place, and though blues is technically my fav bc i love old music, i never listen to it in 2077. So I switch between Body Heat, the Dirge, Vexelstrom for like 2 songs, and ofc, Morro Rock. But of all stations, there’s at least one song that i HATE so I can never stick to one for a whole ride sknsksjsjs)

i think i got the names right?? Idk yall i dont have it in front of me ndndndndhjs

3. how did you feel about Johnny that first night in the apartment, and how does it differ from what you feel now after everything?

so i’m gonna cut a read-more here because i decided to just lore dump Vana x Johnny here so uhhhhhh rip also //SPOILERS//

Vana is an extremely, seriously private, guarded person. Before Johnny, Panam, Kerry- Jackie was the only person she’d ever truly let near her, to get to know her. So obviously waking up to someone else living inside her fucking head was one of the worst things that’s ever happened to her. Her past is also something she’s not particularly proud of, so Johnny getting to witness all that is traumatising. Getting Johnny out of her head was priority number one, even if digging the chip out would kill her.

But after getting fucked over by the VBs, and both of them thinking she was gonna die, Johnny takes her to that abandoned hotel in Pacifica- it’s the first time he’s given her even a sliver of kindness, and the first time she’s ever openly expressed her fears to him, even if he could already sense them before. Oaths and promises are something she holds to incredibly high importance, so obviously when Johnny gives her his dog-tags, ‘proof of my promise’, she never, ever lets them go, never takes them off. (she still doesn’t. they keep her grounded. holding them to calm herself has become a reflex, for whatever reason.)

Everything just seemed to slowly change after that. For two people who hate vulnerability, it’s the only thing that helped them actually see each other. As the Relic continues to take over, they both understand each other more, feel each other more- and eventually it becomes hard to discern where Vana ends and Johnny begins. In cliché Johnny x V fashion like yeah duh it goes further,,,, cockwhore!Vana,,,,,, but with that they also start to become extremely possessive and jealous over one another- Johnny immediately on the defensive about whoever comes close to her, Vana selfishly hiding and keeping Johnny’s existence to herself, even if it slows the hunt for a remedy to the chip- to the point of seriously toxic co-dependency. It’s full of volatile ups-and-downs, fights and make-ups, and Vana almost comes to like the fact that she never has to explain nor hide what thoughts and feelings pass through her mind, no matter how dark or vulnerable. She prefers most things to remain unsaid, but values the fact that they both have a clear, transparent understanding of each other regardless.

But there's also... softer moments. When Johnny puts aside his ego for once, he learns to like the quiet that Vana does, brief as it can be sometimes. He'll sort of just... stay around the room, even if just to procrastinate retreating back into her head, because they realise they like each other's silent, wordless company. He'll wake her up from nightmares, hold her neck and kiss her back to sleep, or until the sun comes up, if she can't. It's all tender things they often pretend doesn't even happen, out of pride, I think, but they both know deep down that those are really the best parts.

Comes to a place where she suddenly hits a wall, and realises, I don’t want him to leave.

She’s never the same again after Mikoshi.

(But uhh anyway fuck V I’m horny on main for Keanu so i was here for the whole riiiiiide yeeeeeee)

5. how do your loved ones (LI, found family, etc) feel about you being a merc? or if you’ve given up the life now that everything’s finished, what was their reaction?

Vana grew up in a rich corp family, and after all the shit she’s endured just to appease her father, don’t think anyone could hate corps more than she does (some details of her past here!!) So when Arasaka kicks her out and Jackie finally convinces her to start merc work, it’s amazing how quickly she slips into the role, almost like she was made for it- an anonymous face within the city, free to roam and drift as she wants, relying on herself and herself only.

Vana works quickly and quietly enough (though not at all with clean hands), relying on stealth and netrunning, so she doesn’t cause too much of a noise that’d have her loved ones (rare as they are) all too concerned. Judy isn’t scared Vana’d be caught in gunfire, because when Vana works, her targets rarely know she’s even there. She’s smart, cunning. Panam appreciates that these skills have helped her out, so she can’t complain. River- who is unfortunately more fond of Vana than she is of him, given that she’s not too comfortable at accepting affection- isn’t too happy about the life she leads, but hey, it’s her skills as a merc and as one of NC’s most adept netrunners that he even stood a chance of finding Randy as quick as he did, so he feels indebted to her for that. Kerry thinks it’s fuckin awesome that she gets to do as she wants and provides for herself, bestieeees

Given she isn’t all that close with many people- keeping her distance and all- the only people who seriously worry about her are folks like Vik, Misty, and Mama Welles, especially the latter two, who knew how much Jackie meant to her, and how easily she cracks under the weight of grief. The only thing, really, that concerns everybody around her, is how insatiable her bloodlust becomes, and how much she'd throw away just to try and quell it.

Johnny’s just in it for the ride. Rather she work for herself than a filthy corp, anyway.

After Mikoshi, losing Johnny, making it to the major leagues, she fuckin... just doesn't care anymore. She hates the big glass house that was practically forced onto her (reminds her too much of her stifling corp childhood), she hates that she has 20 cars that clog up her garage and not just her trusty red Yaiba Kusanagi, hates that folks keep giving her all this shiny golden shit that she doesn't want, like any of it's worth a damn. Since then she's hardly in one place- never at home if she can help it, and either wanders aimlessly around the streets and crashes over at Kerry's to sleep through grief. It isn't the merc life she wants to leave, but major leagues turned out to be a glittering pile of dogshit she wants no part in. She only really stays there because Jackie would've wanted it.

(i’m a lazy bitch like i don’t wanna be a merc. i wanna be one of those cute npc’s with the glowy earrings and bunny backpacks and skimpy plastic skirts, who picks up noodles on the way home to go watch watson whore. in my ideal life i am NOT the main character snnsmsnsks)

15. which NPC is your bff?

Kerry. Kerry is Vana’s ride or die. No fucking questions asked. Kerry’s the only person (besides Johnny, i guess) as close to her as Jackie was. He’s really the only person that ever gets her to smile, like really, stupidly, goofily smile, and despite being almost complete opposites, they just understand each other so well. Whenever they need something, they're the first person they'll call. Happens so often that just as Vana sifts through her contacts to find his, Kerry's already calling for her first. They're practically joint at the hip.

They both live loud, fast lives, but also know how to make time for silence and introspection, something they both need to stay grounded. Vana doesn't buy into his zen-wellness-yoga crap, but sure, she tries copying a couple moves while he's doing it on a lazy afternoon, before scoffing how this is fuckin' dumb and retreats back to the couch. Also, as much as she hates being reminded of the wealth that came with her corpo upbringing, she loves using up all his expensive products, and tends to klep a bottle of his shampoo when she runs out. Cute how she thinks he doesn't notice.

After what happened in Mikoshi, she practically lives at Kerry's place, just dozing away miserably as he lounges by the pool, or curl up on the couch to mindlessly watch his old Samurai tapes (he doesn't like it much, but if it helps her through whatever shit she's going through, he's not gonna take that away from her). On better days, when she actually pulls herself out of bed, he teaches her to play guitar, slipping in a couple tricks Johnny taught him. Funnily enough, the whole thing helps him find some closure too.

( me,, I need a girl like Panam in my life to endorse all of my stupid ideas )

18. what’s your dream cyberware (either something that was shown in lore that wasn’t available in game or mental creation of your own)?

I don’t have access to the tabletop lore stuff rn so i’m gonna pull this out my ass jsjsns

Anything that helps Vana become more deadly at stealth and netrunning. The most eddies she’s ever blown are on increasingly powerful cyberdecks, cooling systems, netrunning gear she can comfortably slip on under a jacket and boots- she likes convenience and functionality, but she needs it to be comfortable, too. She’d fucking kill for anything that lets her scale silently up walls and across ceilings, though- like a spider- and anything that lets her get her hands reeeeal bloody, but quietly. Guess that’s just called a knife, though.

(Me?? Fuck uhhh man i just want synth-skin that looks normal but also shimmers all pink n cute. Literally wanna be an edward cullen sparkly lookin mf. Also, i’m sorry but scanning shit w Kiroshi’s are so dope that’s literally all i want?? Idk i’m boring and mantis blades freak me out uhh)

20. is there anyone you’re crushing on that’s unavailable? (yes this is the “what romance option(s) are you foaming at the mouth for” question)

Answered here :)

(And i’ll say it again, PLACIIIIIIIDE,)

[ikiruwill]

THE POSITIVE & NEGATIVE ;   mun & muse - meme .

fill out & repost ♥ This meme definitely favors canons more, but I hope OC’s still can make it somehow work with their own lore, and lil’ fandom of friends & mutuals. Multi-Muses pick the muse you are the most invested in atm.

my muse is:   canon / oc / au / canon-divergent / fandomless 

Is your character popular in the fandom?  YES / NO.

Is your character considered hot™ in the fandom?  YES / NO / IDK.

Is your character considered strong in the fandom?  YES / NO / IDK.

Are they underrated?  YES / NO.

Were they relevant for the main story?  YES / NO.

Were they relevant for the main character?  YES / NO / THEY’RE THE PROTAG.

Are they widely known in their world?  YES / NO.

How’s their reputation?  GOOD / BAD / NEUTRAL.

how strictly do you follow canon? 　i try to follow canon as much as possible for shinji in nge. for rebuild, mostly, only bc nge is my main version of shinji. it’s been a while since i read the manga, and there’s definitely stuff to like about it, but imo sadamoto’s writing there isn’t as good as anno’s is in nge ( and rebuild... to an extent ), so i’d probably end up changing some details for manga!shinji with whatever headcanons if i wrote him more often / went into depth about things? but it’s still interesting to see how different shinji and kaworu ( + other characters ) are in the manga, and new dynamics can be fun!!

SELL YOUR MUSE! aka try to list everything, which makes your muse interesting in your opinion to make them spicy for your mutuals.    lemme try and sell you nge first unless you’ve already sold your soul to it LOL join me.... tldr it’s a classic anime and still relevant today despite it being like 24 years old ( with tons of merch now most i would shamelessly buy ). there’s so many characters that feel real and human in nge. hideaki anno poured too much of his heart and soul into it, the reflections of himself and his personal feelings feel very raw. i could also try to sell you like every nge character bc they’re all so well written but mha;lskdjf on to the last point. being the main character for eva, shinji is iconic too... he’s among the best leads i’ve seen in anime. most critics will agree and have agreed with this for decades ( if you only ask me, he’s number one for everything bc i’m biased af ❤ ). i talk too much about how he’s bby / cute and does his best, but probably not enough about how flawed he is as a person too, his deeper wants and needs, and when those things go horribly wrong. the duality is really what makes shinji complex and human. also bonus points!! he’s frequently scored at the top for fav anime characters in japan since ‘95 in newtype and stuff n_n

now the OPPOSITE, list everything why your muse could not be so interesting ( even if you may not agree, what does the fandom perhaps think? ).    next to louder and more colourful characters like asuka, for example, shinji can come off as quiet and boring ( especially compared to traditional hot blooded mecha protagonists in general ). shinji isn’t a genius or leader. he’s super passive, introverted, shy, and bad at fun conversations. he saves the world and tries to do the right thing, so by definition, he’s a hero--- but he’s also just a boy who’s gone through a lot. he has a lot of depth and hidden anger / feelings in general, but it would take a lot for him ( i.e. pressure, circumstances ) to express that outwardly--- daily shinji isn’t really like that. fandom wise, i think shinji recently came in 4th in the NHK eva popularity contest, so that’s pretty good, people do like him there. kawoshin is also as popular as ever ( and i’ve also seen more shinji fans in the western side too ). meanwhile old nge fandom be like ‘shinji u loser get in the fucking robot!!!111 ur surrounded by hot chicks every single day and still cry wow’ but that’s more like an ironic meme nowadays LOL

what inspired you to rp your muse?    i finally watched eva properly like two years ago?? ( too late 4 kawoshin 2015 fandom q-q ) it was good so i sold my soul to it and shinji mhasdflkj

what keeps your inspiration going?    eva being my fav anime and shinji my fav character, seeing fanworks of eva, and ofc everyone who interacts with me here on my blog q-q bless u and thank u

some more personal questions for the mun .

give your mutuals some insight about the way you are in some matters, which could lead them to get more comfortable with you or perhaps not.

do you think you give your character justice?  YES / NO.

do you frequently write headcanons?  YES / NO ( sometimes )

do you sometimes write drabbles?  YES / NO.

do you think a lot about your muse during the day?  YES / NO.

are you confident in your portrayal?   YES / NO.

are you confident in your writing?  YES / NO ( sort of?? )

are you a sensitive person?  YES / NO.

do you accept criticism well about your portrayal?    yes to respectful and constructive criticism!! but i’m still pretty circumstantial about it for my comfort ( just to avoid random ppl being rude etc ), so i think i’d prefer to reblog a meme for that and / or ask for opinions and tips from my mutuals!

do you like questions, which help you explore your character?    yesss, i think most of us would love that n_n both unprompted and reblogged memes work for me

if someone disagrees to a headcanon of yours, do you want to know why?    i’m a private blog, so if it’s more of a plot based headcanon that a mutual wanted to discuss for fun and in a friendly way, then ok! i think there’d be room for constructive discussion there ( ah yes eva and its 24 years of pepe silvia meme.png complex lore discussion still going strong ) 

if someone disagrees with your portrayal, how would you take it? 　similar to the above and the constructive criticism thing, i’ll only care / be open to discussing that kinda stuff if we’re mutuals and if you’ve seen eva, etc. 

if someone really hates your character, how do you take it?    as seriously as a funny meme when it comes to randos LOL buuuut long answer too: i’ve also seen passionately mean spirited, usually terrible and equally as unironic takes about shinji on the internet bc that’s the internet sometimes rip. this version of hate is more annoying and can suck just to look at, especially if it gets lots of attention in the form of agreement ( it usually makes me think, did we even watch the same show ). but also arguing endlessly with whoever wrote it / believes it would suck even more ( being a waste of time for one ). i guess that’s one reason why i care more about the personal safe space i’m trying to create on my dashboard etc. and people have very different opinions about anything in general. but basically, in general, this: if someone hates x or y fictional character with such a burning passion, and they won’t be satisfied unless they try to convince others to hate them too, or say that fans of x or y character are bad people irl and belittle said fans for it on their own time ( or openly harass those fans ), and if they’re crusading this idea, constantly?? block, blacklist, report for harassment if noted, filter it out--- it’s definitely better to stay away from that kind of negativity ( also bc it’s absurd and necessary ). i question anyone who finds joy / importance in trying to police the content and comfort of others, but i also know that they wouldn’t have fun hanging out with me LOL kaworu vc surround yourself with people who love shinji ikari 

are you okay with people pointing out your grammatical errors?    sure, once in a while is fine, especially if i made a typo or something that makes the context or anything confusing / unclear!

do you think you are easy going as a mun?    i try to be!! despite that longer rant just now mhas;ldkfj thanks for reading this far if you still are LOL 

That’s about it, congrats for filling out!

tagged by: @skyvar​ aka the creator n_n thank you omg?? this was awesome!! tagging: if you wanna!

[bloodfcst-a]

TAGGED BY : @officiums​ ( like 28 years ago but ty! )

TAGGING : @garrotejima​ @dojiryu​ @enshijou​ @extremepath​ @heartmemos​ @90smagicalboy​ @dramaytan​ @cihcreha​  @shimmerseas​ & if this suits your fancy!

NAME : pacifica ! but you can say paci for short.  FACECLAIM : i use the same as yufi-- son ga in.  PRONOUNS : she / they. i’d prefer the latter, but i’m used to the former.  HEIGHT :  5′2.5....... i’ll say 5′2. i’m getting smaller all the time. BIRTHDAY :  23 july. AESTHETIC : hipster? idk. that’s what people tell me. i’m just into comfortable and cute clothes, soft goth and cardigans and the atypical. LAST  SONG  YOU  LISTENED  TO : everything i wanted  /  billie eilish. FAVORITE  MUSE (S)  YOU’VE  WRITTEN : this iteration of yufi. however, paz was intriguing yet challenging & i have a soft spot for a zidane i wrote back in high school.

* GETTING  TO  KNOW  THE  ACCOUNT :

WHAT  INSPIRED  YOU  TO  TAKE  ON  THIS  MUSE : well, i loved yuffie.... but for many reasons i don’t want to openly go into detail about, i fell out of love with the ffrp. that’s an understatement, honestly-- my life was at a low point physically, emotionally, socially... and then ffrp was contributing more harm than good. i didn’t want to be a big name with big pressure anymore. and i didn’t want to be bound to that fandom anymore, especially when the fandoms that sparked joy in me lay elsewhere. so it just made sense to jump ship. and i’ve been happy ever since! though... i still do like a few connections i have, and it’s nice to have something to jump off of, bc making ocs from scratch typically overwhelms me... i feel inclined to be too ambitious and then i just want to back off. 

WHAT  ARE  YOUR  FAVORITE  ASPECTS  OF  YOUR  CURRENT  MUSE :  a babe in like 25,000 ways of the word.

ok but really though. i love how daring and fearless she is. yufi is not invincible and she doesn’t ever proclaim to be-- but she does try to be above and beyond in everything else. she desires attention and camaraderie.... demands it, really, but in an over-exaggerated sort of manner because she’d rather make someone laugh than to have someone pity her. she’d rather someone find her amusing and entertaining than tragic... even if she’s had a lot of tragedy in her life & a lot of misunderstandings.

i also think she’s admirable in how daring she is... in her looks, her attitude, her unwavering desire to protect others and never back down. there’s no fear in going against the grain, defying conventional norms, in doing what she likes because it suits her whims as opposed to some... moral decision or what’s popular choice. she appreciates customs and traditions, but isn’t bound by them-- i love that about her.

WHAT’S  YOUR  BIGGEST  INSPIRATION  WHEN  IT  COMES  TO  WRITING : my partners? ok but like. i love yakuza and i love persona... and i think modern verses are cool..... but like... it’s my partners who get me excited about exploring new verses or ideas... in delving into further situations with my muse. i love being able to play yakuza or shenmue with danny & devil and being like.... oh... what would yufi do now? i love playing kh2 and thinking... how come yufi is out here doing the things she does. i haven’t had so much thrill playing vii in a while... but maybe when remake comes out, i’ll be excited for wutai again. in the meantime... i love watching content about japan and korea... like daily life vlogs or expats who are making their ways.... i love the feeling of immersion. all of that. the exposure to ideas & then being able to expand upon them with people? mega exciting!

FAVORITE  TYPES  OF  THREADS : literally just write with me scoobs i’m starving. i will say i’ve always struggled with action threads... but i’m doing my best!

BIGGEST  STRUGGLE  IN  REGARDS  TO  YOUR  CURRENT  MUSE :  the people who think because yufi is pretty sexy that it’s an invitation to ask me about my sexual interests....... always thought that was a weird trend. also, “ u write well so maybe that’s ur personality, let’s date. ” i honestly don’t think i write enough ooc on this blog for someone to want to make serious life decisions over? i’d prefer if more people tried to get to know me.... 

also, this is more of a pet peeve, but i’ve hated how yufi keeps getting labeled as a “kleptomaniac” when even in canon she’s only stolen things that were pertinent to her goal of restoring wutai, or would give her power... and she usually plays it off when she’s caught because she can’t stand the concept of looking weak in front of others. that being said, somehow that label still follows me even though i’ve been listed as fandomless? i ... really don’t like the kleptomaniac trope applied to yufi, and i hope people note that when they pursue interactions with me. it seems to be an easy go-to for people when i like starter calls, but like.. please show me that you’ve looked into any of the content i have here by picking something that isn’t so out-of-character. there might be a yuffie out there who loves to steal for the thrill of it.... but this isn’t it, and i wouldn’t know where to find them, quite frankly! i’m happier being unaffiliated and i have no plans to return~

[awed-frog]

in which caesar doesn’t do anything much and all the women are named julia

[Hi, this is me stanning Adrian Goldsworthy’s biography of Caesar. I studied Classics, but not this period, so all I can contribute here are squeals of delight, a few mistakes and the occasional witty comment. If you’d like to know more, please buy the book - it’s really good and a fun read.]

PART 2

The thing is - there’s a lot of boring relevant political stuff going on in this chapter, but I’m mostly fascinated by the glimpses we get into the world of Roman women. 

As I said, this is not really my area, so I know random, unconnected facts about how life was like for them; also it doesn’t make much sense to talk about ‘Roman women’, because, as a reminder, ‘Rome’ stretches from the 14th century BC to the 14th century AD, came to include dozens of very different regions, and obviously was home to an incredibly diverse population. And if we’re talking about the late Republican / imperial aristocracy, there’s a sharp divide anyway: on the one hand, the ‘ideal woman’ is the same old model we’re all used to and heard about (silent, obedient, virtuous, chaste, a perfect mother and so on), but on the other, Roman noblewomen had a lot more freedom than, say, their Greek counterparts, so there was usually some political scheming going on - something that in Greece was reserved to a handful of very well-placed courtesans. 

(In this sense, think about the contrast between Lucretia, the mythological wife of Collatinus, whose fridging created the Republic, and Agrippina, mother of Nero, empress and all-round badass bitch.)

Anyway, this chapter made me think about women because it starts with Caesar being born and getting his name - it’s sort of an urban legend, btw, that every single Roman had three names: that was just for the Moste Noblest - and how Goldsworthy casually mentions that, unlike men, women of noble birth would just take their family surname as first name. In Caesar’s family, for instance, all the women were named Julia.

(As a reminder: his given name was Caius, then ‘Julius’ identified the tribe, and finally ‘Caesar’ was a nickname that was possibly given to his grandfather for something elephant-related. 

People whose grandfathers did not do elephant-related stuff generally never enjoyed the prestige of a funny nickname passed down through the generations.)

So it’s bad enough that twins might be named ‘Peter and Not-Peter’ or ‘Peter and Twin’, but imagine going to the park with your buggy and meeting your old friend Oldest She-Jones (daughter of Ferdinand Jones), now married to George David Taylor, and her five kids - Louis David Taylor, She-Taylor, She-Taylor the Second, She-Taylor the Third and She-Taylor Born on Christmas. So damn cute, and also the reason why the Romans never developed smartphones or social media - how the hell are you supposed to find someone on Vultocodex when every single cousin and aunt has the exact same name?

Poor management, that is.

But anyway - as I said, there’s a dissonance here because women being treated like garbage (like, not given normal names and married off at fourteen) also led to the very peculiar phenomenon: generations of (male) politicians and VIPs being raised by very forceful, strong, and ambitious (widowed) mothers. Because if you count old age, wars, trampolining injuries (let’s be honest, men have always been obsessed with attempting dangerous stunts just for the fun of it) and the general risks of Roman politics, it was very usual for a noble kid to not even remember his father at all.

(Nero is a good example of how weird and all-consuming this boy-mother relationship could become - there’s entire books about it, but I’d point 16-and-over readers to Suetonius’ Life of Nero for details.

Keep in mind 95% of it is propaganda because Suetonius hated Nero, but still. HBO-worthy stuff in there.)

All this to say - we know that Caesar had a very close relationship with his mom (named ‘Aurelia’ because - you guessed it - she came from the Aurelii family), who was a near perfect figure of virtue, intelligence, beauty and common sense. Very powerful in her own right, Aurelia raised Caesar basically on her own, because her (much older) husband was either away at war or dead for most of their marriage.

Aside from drinking in Aurelia’s wisdom, Caesar’s education also included the normal lessons noble Roman boys were required to learn: self-worth, narcissism, delusional manias, rhetoric, martial arts, horse-riding, and writing really bad fanfiction based on Greek myths.

And now for the MEANWHILE part.

(I have no idea why this gif was tagged ‘meanwhile’, but I’m not enough of an idiot to let it go to waste, so.)

Meanwhile, all sort of messes were going on.

As I’m sure you remember, at some point the consul was Marius - Caesar’s uncle and a military genius, but not much of a politician. His negotiation tactic of choice was secretly inviting groups of unconnected people to his house on the same night, serving them dinner in two separate rooms so they wouldn’t see one another and try to work out some kind of agreement between them. Whenever a new point came up, Marius would say he had diarrhoea, pretend to run to the bathroom and instead sit down with the second group and see what they thought about the first group’s proposal.

(Isn’t ancient Rome magnificent?)

A big problem Marius had to deal with was how to grant citizenship to the allied tribes in Italy without pissing off current citizens. Basically no one wanted these other guys to be given new rights, but since they supplied more than half the soldiers of the Roman army and got nothing in return, their patience was running a bit thin. At some point, Roman bureaucrats started to erase foreign-born citizens from their lists claiming they were not actual citizens (something so openly dishonest NO OTHER GOVERNMENT would EVER attempt it again), and next yet another tribune working on a citizenship reform was stabbed to death in the street. 

So the allies went to war. 

(This war, confusingly, is known as the Social War, because ‘socius’ means ‘ally’ in Latin.)

As you can imagine, it was a disaster. Most of the allied communities had been part of the Roman republic for I don’t want to check but let’s say decades, they lived side by side with Roman families and fought in the same wars, so it was more of a civil war than anything else. Some tribes chose to remain faithful to Rome, others didn’t. Lots of people died.

Caesar was too young to be a soldier, but this was Cicero’s first taste of war (bet you never thought of that weaselly weasel as a soldier, uh? appearances can be deceiving, folks!). Marius was also involved, but since he was old as shit and had famously weak and leaky guts (hahahhaha), he mostly stayed out of active combat, which wasn’t all that normal for a Roman general. In the end, the whole of Italy, down to defeated tribes, cows, dogs and random patches of mossy rocks, was granted citizenship and everyone went home. Their votes, however, were inserted in the system in such a way that they didn’t count much. 

On the whole, the one winner of this war was Lucius Cornelius Sulla, one of the military commanders, who became a consul soon after.

Another war, because this is Rome and Romans were dicks, but! this one was in the East, which means every single soldier would get super rich and also! wars in the East were considered easy because *insert racist trope here* and! Sulla had been promised that, as the big winner of the Social War, he could go there with his legions and basically enjoy this Disneyland of golden cups and ultraviolence but! at the last moment, Marius, who never liked Sulla much, managed to snatch the commandership from him, which! was completely legal but also *insert outraged emoji* and wait for it! instead of going gentle into the good night, Sulla made a fiery speech to his soldiers all like GUESS WHAT FOLKS WE’RE STUCK HERE SCRATCHING OUR TESTICULI AND THOSE IDIOTS FROM THE 25TH ARE TAKING YOUR GOLD AND YOUR UNWILLING WOMEN and! Sulla’s entire army marched! on! the! city! of! Rome!

It was the first time a Roman army had ever invaded Rome. Nobody was expecting it, and people panicked. Sulla’s men won easily, burned down some buildings, killed some people, generally had a great time; and then Sulla announced a bounty for anyone who’d disembowel his political enemies (including Marius) because he didn’t have time to go to Braavos and learn how to do it himself (remember, he still had his war waiting for him in the East).

(This turned out to be a success, btw. One guy was even killed by his slave - Sulla gave him the promised reward, then shoved him off a mountain because duh, slave and “When I said ‘anyone’, I meant people, not IKEA furniture” and “Honestly”.)

As nobody could have imagined and/or predicted, as soon as Sulla left for Greece Weak Guts Marius came back with an army and took back the city, beheading his way to the Senate and leaving a trail of blood wherever he passed. As soon as he got there, however, he dropped dead - heart attack, trampolining, diarrhoea, who can tell - and the city was taken over by his second-in-command, Lucius Cornelius Cinna.

(Man, what a ride.)

Unfortunately, it’s impossible to know what Caesar was doing during this time.

Personally, I like to imagine him in Rome - a well-dressed, grey-eyed 15-year-old, freshly orphaned, horrified and exhilarated by the violence exploding all around him - I see him running down the streets, stopping to watch the corpses float in the dark waters of the Tiber, daring his friends to go and touch the severed heads nailed to the doors of the Senate; recognizing many of those heads as friends and colleagues of his father and uncle (passing a hesitant finger on the cold flesh, remembering how they’d once laughed and frowned and spoken about boring matters from the dais). 

The truth is, Caesar was just a kid. He was supposed to learn about the Republic, and his own role in making it great, by watching his elders. 

God knows what he actually learned, and what he thought, as he was passing through Rome’s paved streets, now shimmering with blood. 

PREVIOUS — NEXT

[silverquillsideas]

Salmon and others were openly discussing rape and talking about drawing rape and there were people in the replies talking about how seeing a “rape drawing” changed the way they consumed content and shipped things (they meant that they liked the rape btw). If she hasn’t gone back to private, you can probably find those for yourself since they’re pretty recent. I thought you seemed nice but I’m really disappointed in you. Will be unfollowing and blocking.

Hello! I was debating on how (if at all) to answer this, since you seem to have already made up your mind to not hear anything further about this issue altogether.

But I do have a few things to say, regardless, because I found specific phrases you used, to be sketchy/unclear at best.

Warning tho : this is going to delve into a discussion of "rape and sexuality" from a real life perspective, since the fandom seems so bent upon drawing parallels to reality and compare fiction and irl examples. If you find that uncomfortable, block the tag "tw:rape" and scroll past.

_____

So, my first point of discussion : "Salmon and others were openly discussing rape and talking about drawing rape"

Putting aside the issue of the subject matter of the threads for a second, I'll focus on the other part : about *posting publicly*. I talked to three separate followers of the twt artist, who also happen to be my tumblr mutuals, and they basically confirmed the same thing : there was no "open discussion", in the sense, that, they did so either on Privatter (assuming you know how it works) or they did in the comment threads on their *personal twitter account*, and only those who were willing to engage in such a discussion, went ahead and joined. They did not encroach on anyone's space and invite them in forcefully.

I'm putting the screenshots of conversation I've had with one of my friends regarding this, and as you can see, none of it was *open for public viewing*

Also, here's the artist's own message that's pinned to their account :

Let me put this in perspective : suppose you're not into kpop (I picked a random example, btw) and find it weird and flamboyant, and you generally avoid it altogether. While scrolling through tumblr, you stumble upon a hardcore kpop blog, you're totally put off by the contents and you complain to your mutuals about how ABC person indulges in kpop and you found it weird and unappealing.

But my point is, there was nothing public about the said blog or account, because, by nature, every blog or account is a person's private space for expression of ideas. Yes, tumblr, twitter and other social media platforms are all *public* in the sense that they are hosted on public domains and anyone with an access to the Internet can stumble upon any website or blog listed therein. But, you, being a responsible, well discerning person, willingly stepped onto a personal blog or acc on which the owner was likely to present their own views, and started complaining about what you found there. Your statement implies, that you willingly browsed through the comment threads until the point you spotted these uncomfortable discussions and you voluntarily exposed yourself to the same.

My second point : "there were people in the replies talking about how seeing a "rape drawing" changed the way they consumed content and shipped things (they meant that they liked rape btw)"

I find it highly confusing how you generalised something as sensitive and complex as psychological behaviour on behalf of a bunch of strangers you never actually interacted with (or confirmed their views on the said matter) and proceeded to label them as "people who liked rape".

What does the statement "liking rape" mean anyway? And, does anyone who talk about or discusses rape, in the context of fanarts and fanfiction, and that too, "rape fantasy" in this case, (but I'll get to it in a moment) automatically becomes someone who likes the act? Or condones it happening in real life, to real people or situations? I'm curious as to which aspect of rape they talked about 'liking' (since your statement implies they explicitly stated so) : was it the pain, the trauma, the physical and psychological stress, or the violence and the sense of dominance over a helpless, real life person?

If you do have an answer supported by evidence, let me know, I'll modify my response gladly.

It brings me to my third point : these artists or the people who commented, were discussing, not about real life rape, but a fantasy situation in which they put two fictional characters together and made a fanart of them (the composition of the art in question is described in the conversation above).

Deriving pleasure from the actual act of rape or sexual violence is a pathological condition and needs medical or psychiatric treatment.

Deriving pleasure or indulging in paraphilic sexual fantasies, however, is not uncommon. I'll redirect you to @iamtrashforash 's post here that describes this issue more coherently. I'll also point you to articles written on PsychologyToday, based on research done on this specific topic of "Rape Fantasy" that I found, and I think everyone should have a look at them :

Article 1

Article 2

If I remember correctly, the actual comment I saw in the screenshot circulating around, regarding the controversy, went something along the lines of "I love seeing Ash's pained face in this situation", and that's what made people lose their minds. There was outrage over "How could you do that with Ash, a CSA survivor? It sends a bad message to them, it's triggering, it's disrespectful, you are disgusting, etc etc."

But, my own conversations with three people who are in real life CSA survivors, two of them who reached out to me in my DMs over the last two days, have given me a very different idea about what these people actually think regarding the art. Here's the hot take : they did not find it disturbing or offensive to themselves personally.

In fact, they pointed out, that they saw it as a fictional scenario, were well aware of the differences between the artist's intent and their potential real life behaviour (FYI, none of them drew the conclusion that either the artist or the people discussing it, "liked rape").

The fact that the comment threads were openly talking about indulging in such a fantasy is what seemed to baffle the more outspoken and outraged people, who proceeded to harass and send hate messages to the creators. But here's the fact : these fetishes have existed for as long as humanity has, and will continue to do so, regardless of whether you crucify a handful of people in a small corner of a fandom or not.

If you're familiar with the yaoi manga genre, or any adult erotica games (I can't cite any examples bc I don't have enough details, but I do know they exist), you'll find a plethora of works where all sorts of fantasy situations are presented : rape is fetishised, there's shape-shifters (vampires or otherwise), A/B/O dynamics, even bestiality. In other words, a major prevalence of themes like dominant, aggressive behaviour contrasted with helpless, passive behaviour as far as sexual situations go. And they are thriving. They have a huge pool of audience out in the world.

Whether these fetishes are "morally right or wrong" to indulge in, is not a question I have any authority to debate, because I'm not a clinical psychologist, or a behavioural scientist.

Personally speaking, I happen to be a demisexual person. Any discussion of sexual situations or scenarios outside of my own very narrow comfort zone or mental compatibility scares the shit out of me. And I find all of the above scenarios I described, as plainly unappealing and downright weird or scary. I will never, as long as I have my faculties in control, go out seeking any of them voluntarily, in either fanarts or fiction.

My point is, this is a complicated issue, I fully acknowledge that beforehand. We, as a fandom, got attached to Ash as a character, for so many different reasons. We all love him, respect him for standing up against all odds, and fighting against his fate all his life. That's the reason why the back-lash against these depictions got so violent, I think. People are more willing to see him heal, to see him make peace with his scars and move on. The general consensus with this line of thought was so ingrained in our minds, that people lashed out as soon as something "against the norms" and "potentially harmful" came to their notice.

But, the thing is, both these outcomes, are fictional. The fandom's biggest purpose is this : we weave fiction out of fiction itself. That's why we have fanarts and AUs and headcanons and a hundred other things. And different people will find different aspects of said fictional scenarios appealing. It's why we have so many ships on one hand and unfortunately, *ridiculous* ship-wars and toxic discourses on the other. But, it's okay to accept that there'll always be differences in such a wide space where everyone is coming together. It's okay to find content you don't agree with, and simply, move on.

But, I'll repeat myself : I'm not going to persecute people, who have carefully tagged, classified, and filtered their content, being mindful of the others in the fandom, and barge on their doors demanding "why they liked what they liked" and "how could they like such a thing??". Especially because it is fiction, involving fictional characters, separated from reality.

Had it been a real life discourse, involving actual people, I'd have definitely spoken out against it.

Also, to anon, if you find my views or ideas unpleasant, or find my completely sfw multifandom blog a safety hazard, then you're more than welcome to unfollow and block me. Your mental peace is all that I ask for. :)

[heavenlyexiled]

                                   britt’s long ass cheesy thank you post.

                                             200 FOLLOWERS! ! ! ! 

it’s been a wild couple of years to get this far. and i’m just, so grateful to have you all here. i know i post a lot ooc and it’s kinda spamming the dash most of the time, i apologize for that. i try not to be annoying, i just get so excited over things or want to apologize for lack of threads & shit. it’s weird, i’m weird and idk why you’re all still here.

i never really? expected to get this far? like, it’s crazy to think 200 of you follow me. ALTHOUGH. HALF OF THAT IS PORN BOTS. yeah, i see you bitches. y’all mvps because for some unknown reason you don’t unfollow. but i mean hey, welcome. mvps right there. HHJDGHHJFSGHHK

granted, the count goes from 200 to 199 which y’know. i don’t mind. y’all do you! but aNYWAY! thank you guys for following me. i’m so sorry that i don’t? interact with half of you. i want to so bad i just get so anxious but i’m trying to do better at reaching out! i love all of you and never expected so many of you to really? be down to interact with elizabeth! when i made her, i didn’t really think anyone would want to write with me because of how... “different” her story was. i was scared about having an oc tbh. i know some people don’t enjoy ocs, which si fine, their choice! respected! but i never thought i’d have this many followers who are CHILL AFFFFF!! ! ! ! i’ve thought about deleting elizabeth and to stop roleplaying all together but THANK GOD I DIDN’T!!! i’ve made some amazing friends here, people who are just overall sweethearts and make me smile whenever i see them on my dash!!! now it’s time for me to fuckin smother these kermits with L O V E! ! ! 

@antibuttons - OF COURSE PAIGE IS FIRST. paige, my love, my wife. MY BEST FRIEND!!! i don’t even know how long we’ve been friends now. but you can literally make me smile any fucking day. we’re on like some same fucking brain level shit. it’s terrifying how we’re in each other’s heads almost every time we talk. GET OUT! ! ! ! !  you help instill confidence in myself and my characters / portrayal of characters whenever i get so insecure i cry to u about it! !  !! i think you’re the only person I KNOW FOR A FACT won’t get annoyed by me and that i can talk about our characters with. like it doesn’t scare me to talk about it with you. other people? FUCKING TERRIFIED ! ! ! !  you’ve been here from day one of elizabeth’s blog. we met on my ellie ( from tlou ) blog and JUST BECAME BEST FRIENDS SO F A S T ! ! ! it’s crazy! and even though you hate asking me to do icons for you / draw things for you. I WILL STILL DO IT BECAUSE I LOVE YOU AND YOU DESERVE THE WHOLE FUCKING WORLD!  !! ! 

@rabbitsolver - MY OTHER W I F E ! !  ! ! ! you’ve also been around in the early days of liz back with her outlast verse! the outlast fandom really being the first fandom to actually welcome liz so openly! you welcomed her with arms wide and I FUCKIG LOVE YOU! i apologize for distancing myself from u, i just get anxious and unsure when to message you / what to talk about! BUT YOU. ARE. AN. ABSOLUTE. FUCKING. ANGEL AND I WOULD KILL 500000 PEOPLE FOR YOU!!!! you’ve been so kind to me and have made me laugh so many times i HAVE SCREENSHOTS TO REMEMBER WHAT MAKES ME LAUGH JHSDHJFSJHHDGHHFD

@ennobledsinner -  Z A A A A F F F  F F F ! ! !  ! sorry if u didnt wanna be tagged in this, too late ur in it, beech. HFHGDHKFGKH I LOVE YOU! we only met this year and i think like?? a month agao?? CANT REMEMBER TBH but i know we haven’t known each other long, but i’d actually take the blame if u murder someone. im r e a d y. you are like??? the tru mvp here. you send in memes and like, i knwo it takes me 84 years to actually fcukin write them but YOU’RE NOT AFRAID TO KICK MY DOORS DOWN WITH THEM! and! you’re so open and willing to ship with liz! i never really get the chance to ship with ehr because i don’t want people to feel uncomfortable ;;;; i got like paige and a few other  people for liz having a romantic ship with muses  but not a lot! and i’m always so scared to ask! but you wERE SO WILLING AND DOWN AND I ACTUALLY CRY WHENEVER I THINK ABOUT IT! you’re so sweet and your writing is something that i genuinely haven’t seen much of, style-wise i mean! it’s so good and like reading a book! detailed and written more like a drabble between two muses and like!?!?! IT’S SO BEAUTIFUL! i’m crying. you’re so sweet and genuine and like i’m very grateful for you sticking around uwu, i hope our friendship continues to grow BC LIKE!?!?!? I L O V E Y O U ! ! ! !  SO MUCH!!!

there’s so many more of you guys to thank, i don’t want to spam y’all however, so just please know that all of you mean so much to me. i’m very awkward with my words but just understand that even if i didnt write soemthing its bc i’m also very tired and want to get this out before i got back down to 199 again JHDFSHJGDH BUT I DO APPRECIATE SO MANY OF YOU! this is such an unorganized fucking thank you post. BUT!

thank you for 200 followers!

[ofbrutus-blog]

if only u all knew about how pumped i am for this ,, i highkey haven’t been in a group in literal months ?? anyway, i’m claire, i’m 18, i’m from australia ( hello gmt +11 ,, hello hell ) & sloane is ... lsiten i love this child ?? a lot ?? & i’m SO EXCITED to be able 2 play him again bc honestly i care abt this fuckin mess so much & i’m lit already in love w everyone else’s muses & i’m just so ..., fuckenin excited ?? anyway ! i’ve got all his details under the cut ,, it got rly long i am so sorry

‹ × landon liboiron ×  › yo, meet sloane vonnegut, aka brutus, a twenty-seven year old lion mess from texas. he’s been living in hennessy for two months now and was convicted of, believe it or not, corruption. a bisexual scorpio, this bartender is pragmatic & equitable, as well as jaundiced & tempestuous.

B A C K G R O U N D.

born in the heart of texas, sloane was raised to be a perfect southern gentleman from the start. whilst his parents were insistent on teaching him right and wrong, they never inflicted any kind of physical, mental, verbal or emotional harm upon their son if he strayed down the wrong path from time to time. as a result, sloane grew to absolutely adore his parents and to this day, he keeps a photo of them in his wallet to remind him to stay grounded. they ultimately taught him the true value of family, and he can never thank them enough for that.

growing up, sloane’s interest in the police force and, ultimately, the fbi, was absolutely undeniable. ( he had the miranda rights memorised before the time he was ten. ) evidently a passion of his, annabelle and joseph vonnegut encouraged sloane to run for it. he starts his police training at fifteen, and by the time he’s eighteen, he’s recruited into the force. ( to this day, he still says it was the happiest day of his life. )

sloane’s a fucking good police officer. wonderfully charming, yet cunning and sly, crime rates plummet under officer vonnegut’s rule. armed with nothing but a sunny smile and a fast-track mind, he’s ( taylor swift vc ) a nightmare dressed like a daydream. he’s every criminal’s worst nightmare, because he’ll send you off with a smile and a lovely little threat.

he’d planned to accelerate through and move to virginia to try and get a training spot with the fbi ; his plans are ruined when, at twenty-four, his girlfriend announces that she’s pregnant with his child. a year later, as he’s cradling his newborn son, he gets a call from his father that his mother has been diagnosed with stage iii breast cancer. that basically puts everything on a halt, bc little mr. family man can’t just let his mother die while he’s off in virginia. 

tbh, he worked his ass off to provide for his then-fiancée, hayley, and their infant son, connor. he was also working to earn enough for his mother’s chemotherapy, and to pay off their mortgage, so ngl he’s working to do a shit ton !!

the pressure gets to him when a killer offers a bribe to look the other way. he knows it’s the wrong thing to do, but he accepts, and he still hasn’t lived it down. sloane fucking hates himself for accepting that bribe, just bc of the consequences.

obviously he gets thrown in hennessy, but hayley breaks off their engagement and tells him it’s best if he doesn’t see connor again which is .. the fuckin final blow bc u know that sloane cares about that baby more than he cares about anything else and the entire concept of not being able to see him fucks him up BEYOND BELIEF

P E R S O N A L I T Y.

once upon a time, sloane was the picture of southern hospitality. sunny smile plastered across his face, he’d lend a helping hand to anyone who needed it. ( bc he’s a good guy that way. )

the police force never really changed that sunny disposition, tbh - he just got a little more suspicious of people, and stopped believing that everyone was good at heart. he realised the nature of humanity to do harm and it fucked him up a lil ngl

at hennessy, he’s got a bit of a reputation as an alcoholic hardass. he’s never quite forgiven himself for taking a bribe and letting a killer walk free, and it’s taken a toll on him. he drinks to deal with the guilt, and as such, he’s a horribly bitter man. 

catch him on a good day, and you might get to see a glimpse of a past self - he might throw you a generous smile, make a genuinely funny joke, he might even treat you to that southern hospitality that still lingers somewhere within him. catch him on a bad day, though, and you’ll swear that it’s the devil standing in front of you. he’ll get bitter, and angry, and he might start going off for no apparent reason, and he’ll look gorgeous while he’s doing it but you just know that you shouldn’t go anywhere near him bc jesus fuckin christ that’s an angry man.

A P P E A R A N C E.

standing at a solid six foot, he uses his height as an intimidation tactic sometimes. he’s not even that tall compared to some, but he gotta do what he gotta do tbh.

his hair curls right down, past his jawline now. he’s too lazy to cut it again, so he’s full-on growing it out.

his beard is disgusting and he needs to shave it and everybody should tell him this

his tattoos are ,, actually so pretty ?? i haven’t decided on what they are yet, but they’ll get their own tag and they spiral down both arms, across his back, down his hips and he has a few on his thighs bc why the fuck not. he loves tattoos so much ??

he has ,, really pretty eyes ?? like they’re this piercing green and they can be so warm n inviting but also they can get cold and harsh and bitter so QUICKLY and it’s kinda hot

he’s real pretty and everyone hates it

W A N T E D  P L O T S.

honestly give me cute shit bc i’m a baby and i want sloane to like ,, not be sad

confidant: gimme someone who sloane just ,, talks to ?? is actually a decent human being to ?? is actually soft n nice and gentle ??

friends with benefits: drowning their sorrows in sex ?? drowning anything in sex ?? absolutely

sparring partners: whether it be verbal or physical, these two work their aggression out on each other and whilst they don’t openly hate each other, they look like they could tear each other’s heads off whilst they’re going at it.

honestly i have a ton more but just like ,, fuck idk