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Zelda goes mushroom girl
#tloz#a link to the past#zelda#link#my art#I was happy with that first one but for some reason decided it still needed a companion piece so I spent way too long on that second one...#I don't think there was any time during the progress where I was happy with it but hfduhdfu at least I got to Attempt drawing moss hell yea#I also at some point sat in Pyu's art stream and said I enjoy drawing legs As I was being murdered by the infamously impossibe (imo) squat.#it's ok I had fun !! but I need to learn how to let doodles be doodles or I'll never finish stuff at this rate dfsuhfd#if everything in my tloz tag looks like it was drawn by different people uuuh 2023 was art crisis year ngl......#I'm falling back into my old ways rn though#anyway I think about these two a lot I think they're both stone faced and awkward ppl in different ways but they try rly hard to be friends#like I like to think it starts out so incredibly awkward and a bit sad bc they keep stepping over each other's toes accidentally the harder#they try but idk they find comfy middle ground idk in my brain they have a very interesting friendship I wanna get around to drawing it#in a proper way that might make sense....#if I don't write 200 tags I will die maybe it's bc I grew up on dA or smth#and yes I know how to find 1 (one) type of mushroom /I/ am not mushroom girl unfortunately smh
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hey look this might be totally weird i’m so sorry if it is but i saw your tags about feeling not femme enough, and i felt that a lot, but also it reminded me of this quote that made me feel very seen. it’s from "Femme-Dyke" by Arlene Istar, featured in The Persistent Desire: A Femme-Butch Reader (there’s a post about it somewhere on this app but i couldn’t find it sorry :’)
"A few years ago, I bought a pair of warm winter boots. I worked in an agency where all the women wore heavy femme drag, and even if I hadn't been out, my differentness was apparent. I wasn't sure if the agency would even let me wear boots to work. I walked into my office, and two male co-workers immediately began playfully whistling. "Ooh, new boots — how butch," they teased me. Later that evening, I met my lover and another friend, both butch identified. They too teased: "Ooh, new boots — how fernmy," they said. And I suppose that's what being a femme-dyke means. The boys think I'm butch, and the girls think I'm femme.”
being femme isn’t just feminine and isn’t just being like. a trad wife. it’s such a complicated expression of gender/masculinity/femininity and a rejection of the rules of traditionally femininity. anyways, basically, you’re slay. don’t let others convince you otherwise.
So it took a long time to figure out how to respond to this.
First off I'll say that this isn't weird at all. One of the biggest things I'm an advocate for is community building, the lowest level of which is simply offering support and kind words to our fellow queer brothers and sisters whenever we can. Thats the most amazing human instinct and you should never appologize for it. 💙
My feelings on this subject are...... confused I guess is the best way of putting it. I suppose its important to clarify.
I'm not a blue collar union worker by choice.
To make a long story short, I'm from a lower middle class family of 7 in central Ohio. College was always going to be a longshot for us. My parents gladly cosigned on college loans and helped out my two sisters in their pursuit of going to college. This wasn't extended to me and my brothers.
Thus I did the stupid thing a lot of kids in my position do.
I joined the military
This was easily one of, if not THE, worst decisions I've ever made in my life. If I'm being frank I believe my parents pushed me towards this due to a combination of rose colored glasses with the armed forces, outright misogynistic veiws of men and women's career paths, and the thought that perhaps the military would beat some semblance of "discipline" into my ADHD self. In attention to a misguided attempt to break up me and my now wife, who at the time wasn't sure if we were going to be able to make long distance work. (Spoiler we did)
Now being 6 years post getting out and having settled into a new state, having recently hit the 10 year mark with my lovely wife, starting my transition, and doing so many other wonderful things I never thought I'd be able to do, I've unfortunately found I don't have any marketable skills that aren't in blue collar industry.
I signed on for an office job and wasn't told till I'm already trapped in BMT that my ADHD disqualified me for that job. I was assigned to be a maintenance technician without much if any consultation from me.
I did most of my time in my contract. Frankly got physical abused more than you'd assume they do nowadays, and generally just tried to learn my job and stay out of the way. When they found out I wasn't going to re-enlist (Duh) they used my ADHD once again as an excuse to revoke my medical waiver and kick me out without giving me access to my GI bill, the whole reason I joined at all.
Blue collar industry is notoriously homo/transphobic and as such I'm still stealth at my place of work, even in a significantly more blue state than I was born in. This is just a fact of my life.
So I'm left in a very awkward position. I have a lot of reasons to love and hate my job and my career in general. Reasons I love it include:
-I can support my families finances
-I can stand up and support my fellow queer brothers and sisters when others mistreat them
-I provide good insurance and stability to my family
-I can help out around the house, fix simple things, rewire outlets ect. Very useful things to know
But at the same time everything related to my job and career is a very painful reminder that:
-I do genuinely enjoy the work, it gives me some level of fulfillment
-I'm only in this situation because of my own families treatment of me pretransition
-I'm only able to keep this position because I stay closeted at work
-I was never in a situation where I felt like I had other options available to me
-I'm here because of my own stupid decisions and my time loaning my soul to an imperialist war machine
-I generally feel trapped in this position and like there aren't really other options for me to pursue
So by connection when I do stuff relating to my job and career outside of work its..... bittersweet? I think thats the best way to describe it. Its my last real big teather to my "old life" as it were and functions to remind me of all the things I wasn't allowed to and still can't have to an extent.
-I likely cannot ever "come out" at this or any other worksite without MASSIVELY affecting my earning potential and my ability to move forward or even get jobs
I appreciate the passage exerpt and I really love how other queer people see me outside of work, and frankly I've been told at work by some that I'm only "stealth" because the old men I work with are dumb as all hell. Stuff like this makes me feel wonderful and much more secure in my identity 💙
But I guess its more of an internal issue of how I veiw myself and how and why my life has gone how it does, rather than one of how others veiw me.
#sorry this was so long#i really appreciate the support#just wanted to clarify#my feelings are mixed and probably always will be on this#personal#guess this is the most personal ive ever really gotten on tumblr#funniest thing is ive been on tumblr basically the whole time#femme#femme4butch#blue collar#idk like 7 trigger warnings?#i never learned how to tag that stuff#if someone knows just put it in the replies and I'll tag#feel free to reblog maybe itll help someone else#not sure how but that's probably the Autism lol#community building#always be kind whenever you can#love all yall
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age swap doodles n stuuuuuffff
#i will never not draw close to the edge of any sheet... im 28 years old i will never learn#also biiiiiiiiiiig files oopsies!! thats how i doodle i sorry... i was gonna move stuff around on different files but... lazy...#plz click to zoom in on the text i wrote too smol#at first these started off as age swap ritshou doodles… but then i wanted to draw everyone else#i get so confused when having to think how toichirou and shou are related in these… and then there’s mama suzuki??? but she’s not his mama!?#do we fw minegishi in the kids smock… look at em#i wanna doodle more characters to ageswap l like doing these#do i dare tag all these peeps#my art#mp100#mob psycho 100#shigeo kageyama#ritsu kageyama#teruki hanazawa#shou suzuki#reigen arataka#tome kurata#serizawa katsuya#ekubo#toichirou suzuki#shimazaki ryou#shibata hiroshi#hatori nozomu#minegishi toshiki#*gasps for air*
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youtube
I might’ve spoiled the plot of Natlan | Genshin Impact THEORY
In which I read so much lore that I gained the power to see the future (maybe) This ended up being a real challenge to make - but it was also really fun! Please do lemme know what you reckon of these ideas, and whether y’all wanna see me pattern-recognition my way into several corkboards worth of theories about any other topics sometime down the line! (^^)/
(also: HAPPY NEW YEAR! 🥳🎉 Here's wishing y'all every good thing for 2024)
#artists on tumblr#abd illustrates#genshin impact#natlan#game theory#idek how to tag this one i've never made a vid like this before uhm-- sgdfksdf#anyway oh my GOD i have had so many brain bees about this topic for the longest time#ik making a half hour video about it is unhinged enough but the fact that nobody else seemed to be talking about some of the patterns#was drivin me BONKERS#im so normal about this lore y'all mhm#but also silly tho the energy of this one is#im really proud of it! it was wierdly scary to branch out from my usual content like this#so i do sincerely hope it's a fun watch (^^)/#i'd love to make more off-the-wall and like deep-dive type stuff like this sometime if it goes over well 💖#it also took-- sO LONG TO MAKE#full time video essayists are to be feared i have learned#Youtube
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master artist and his number one fan
guy who is being so normal about the new additions to their profiles. i think abt midoris initial infatuation with his art slowly developing into appreciating yuzuru himself as a person and idol to the point he worries about how he sees him (ex: a bit of home party and in workplace survival rules) sometimes thats a lie i think about it a lot. and yuzuru learning to enjoy art just for the sake of drawing!! seeing the lets try diy story where he doesnt even refute drawing on midoris desk and was only worried that his doodles might cover up the mascot design compared to how discouraged he usually would be in earlier ! stories. everything to me i adore their dynamic if that wasnt obvious by *gestures to basically everything*
and happy pride month 🏳🌈
#sorry for that last bit in the end (im really not)#minicomic tag#duck scribbles#enstars#midoyuzu#midori takamine#yuzuru fushimi#yuzumido#ensemble stars#ive been wanting to draw this one out for ages now or2 finally somewhat free#i would have typed all that out in the tags like i usually do but this commentary is necessary#was going through my old art and wow its been a while. redrew a few stuff from a bunch of them too for this :'] if you can spot them#kinda a fun look back on how ive improved over time too... thank you for giving me a drive to draw like no other#it cannot have been that long. was so sure my energy wouldve died off maybe a few months in but unfortunately it shows no signs of ceasing#also appreciation specifically for my beloved ducky for letting me word vomit a lot of my ideas to him LOL ily#ive drawn them so much now that theyve joined the ranks of my most used tags that pop up as suggestions when i start to type. wtf#was supposed to only work on this on the side between sketching up merch designs but i got too into it. i never learn
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[<==PREV PAGES] [NEXT PAGE==>(not out yet.wait a year.or maybe more.imagine.]
saw alot of comments on prev pages; saying 'i HATE that mean teacher! im gonna FIGHT HIM!!' & i LOVE the energy!! it WOULD be nice. to have that catharsis. but the story of young tidestrider is Not one of catharsis. it is a story of being so small and so special and sucking so bad.
#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#jrwi riptide#gillion tidestrider#GONNA START FORMATTING MY COMICS BETTER. W THE PROPER 'PREV' 'NEXT' LINKS#REALLY DIDNT EXPECT TO CONTINUE THIS SERIES BUT AAAUUUHH MY BRRAAAIN MY BRAIN IS SO IDEASSS. I HAVE 3 OTHER PAGES SKETCHED OUT#NO PROMISES ILL FINISH EM ANY TIME SOON OR EVER. MY WHIMS ARE THEIR OWN BEAST AND I ONLY DRAW ON MY WHIMS#THAT BEING SAID IF U COMMISSIONED ME ILL GEEETT TO YOUUU IM SORRYYYY. ART IS AN EMOTIONAL RELEASE FOR ME N BABY I HAVE EMOTIONS.#ESPECIALLY ABOUT GILLION TIDESTRIDER CHAMPION OF THE UNDERSEA HERO OF THE DEEP.for the desc here i put smth that i typed up in the tags of#another thing i made. i gotta make a proper Baby Gillion tag or smth. eventually.. eventually...I LOVE DRAWIN THIS LIL BABY GUY..#i also LOVE depicting the teachers as just being so fuckin mean. ofc theres variation in that. just like in all things.like the teacher her#idk if itll be mentioned but the octo lady is named Ms Octburn.an octopus pun based off the name of an actual councilor i had#when i was in elementary school i got bullied alot but teachers never did anything. i hated adults and didnt trust them.#but this councilor o mine was so genuinely sweet. i remember spending alot of time w her. she doesnt work there anymore.#but that one school adult that actually earns ur trust and is there for you when they can be.its SO important for a child i think#i hope she knows how much she helped me.youll see in the next page that ms octburn isnt perfect either.but she tries. they all try.somehow.#ALL these comics are gonna be inspired by somesorta experience o mine in the school system. school is so fucked up u ever thing abt that#AND GILLIOOOOONNN IN THE MOST FUCKED UP LITTLE SCHOOL OF ALL. MAINTAINED BY A CULT. CENTERED AROUND HIM. OUR CHOSEN ONE#I IMAGINE ALOT BANKS ON HIS SUCCESS. THIS IS THE WORLD. THE WHOLE WORLD. THE PROPHECY IS GOING TO COME TRUE N UR TELLIN ME#THAT ITS THIS LITTLE IDIOT THATS GONNA BE SAVING US? WHAT IF HE FAILS. IF HE CANT GET THIS RIGHT THEN HE WILL FAIL AND WE WILL DIE#WE NEED TO TRAIN HIM. WE NEED HIM TO LEARN. AND TO SUCCEED. OR ELSE WE'RE DEAD. WE'RE ALL FUCKING DEAD. I IMAGINE THAT MUST BE STRESSFUL#in other news i hope ppl actually giggle when they read these. they ARE intended to be comical. dark humor or whatever. like its also sad#this is intended to be a sad comic series. but a funny one too. does that make sense? god i hope so.saw some1 say they had flashbacks-#-reading this. like YES!! THE INTENDED EFFECT!! YOU GET ME!! i love seeing ppl get upset on this lil baby boys behalf. i LOVE seeing ppl-#-wail n weep n cry in the comments. i LOOOVE seeing ppl RELATE to baby gillion. and i love letting u all know that this wont be a happycomi#gillion gets his happiness arc in the actual show. this series is one of unfortunate events. teehehehe. do u guys remember that show#i keep listening to the lil songs from A Series of Unfortunate Events for inspiration. GOOD STUFF!!#anyway uuhh uhh thats all i got in my brain. for now. feed me ur comments give me ur input i NNEEEEEDD THHEEEMMMM
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been thinking about that post war, first rain in ranoch kiss with tali and femshep ❤
#mass effect#tali zorah#femshep#mass effect legendary edition#post reaper war ranoch#dear bioware...#how many love letters do we need to send for this to happen? ahaha at least we will always have the modding community <3#drew this a while back never thought i'd post it but i saw in the tags from the previous sketch i did that people wanted some tali and shep#and we have so few femshep and tali stuff out here and i figured i should just post it :'')#i should learn to paint better#drabstuff#have all my love you tali and femshep shippers out there <3
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I CAVED.
I MADE THE EDIT
#I’ve never tried to attach a video before but I never knew you couldn’t do it as a reblog#or that might just be a me thing#probably just a me thing#but anyways I was just saying earlier how much I wanted this#and so I learned how to make it#baby’s first edit I guess#star trek#star trek tng#tng#star trek the next generation#star trek data#data soong#star trek edit#we both reached for the gun#I suck at tagging stuff
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sb humanizations + various vannys :3
#my art#fnaf#security breach#five nights at freddy's#so can i tag everyone or would that just be annoying. oh well#glamrock freddy#glamrock chica#glamrock bonnie#roxanne wolf#montgomery gator#monty gator#djmm#dj music man#daycare attendant#sundrop#sunnydrop#vanny fnaf#vanny#vanessa sb#<- idk how to tag her HFJSGJKD#ANYWAYYYY i've been learning how to incorporate cheekbones into the faces i draw#bc i want to draw vanessa's face similarly to the proportions of the vanny mask (with the big cheeks and slim face)#but it's also just something i've been really wanting to do anyway.. i've even been referencing the way team f/rtress 2 stylizes the faces#of all the mercs and stuff. bc i used to be obsessed with that game but i could never actually draw the characters properly#and it's been sooo SO helpful for me. its like a night and day transition for my art it's craaazy#anyway as for the other designs here.... these are all completely improvised Except for sun bc i've drawn this human sun before and i have#a general idea of what i want. but for the others idk if i'll draw them this exact way again in the future lmao. but i think they're still#pretty good for what they are !!!!#anyway i will stop rambling now HFKAJFKSG bye
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Lol omg at your last ask because imagine dippers under some truth spell and ends up spilling a bunch of secrets that Bill already knew and had stashed to use for later
This is no longer 'last ask' relevant because I had this partially written in my drafts for like a million years - but a Truth spell on Dipper would be very interesting!
So I took this prompt and didn't really answer it except in some ways.
Here's a thing!
“You never bring me any souvenirs.” Bill complains. In an all-too-whiny tone, and an all-too-close lean into Dipper's personal space.
Plus, it's a blatant lie. One Dipper shouldn't respond to.
He does anyway. “I literally brought you harpy feathers last week.”
“Doesn’t count! That was for a ritual you wanted to pull off!” Bill sounds miffed, though he also plants a palm on Dipper’s head and starts ruffling hair. “Now where's the emerald from last March? Or like, the headdress from that cult with all the rabbit bones? The good stuff."
Dipper grunts. He focuses on navigating back out of the cave, turning the clay tablet over in his hands.
Figures Bill would remember all the times he did get something. His memory is excellent. And he’s greedy, because a new toy every time is a big ask.
What does Bill expect, anyway. Not every situation Dipper gets into has something to bring back. What could he even offer? An ear taken off every monster he has to fight?
Wait, no. Bill would love that.
Dipper makes a face. “You've just proved that it's not ‘never’. With examples."
"Sure, but when’s the last time it was cool?”
Dipper sighs. No point in arguing. Bill could go on forever about how 'unfair' it is that he doesn't get trophies from every trip, or trinkets from conquered lands, or, again, ears from every enemy. When he’s decided to complain, no reasonable argument will shake him out of it.
“Too bad, then. You’re only getting some gifts.” Dipper shakes his head rapidly to dislodge Bill’s hand from his hair. "It’s hardly the worst thing that’s ever happened to you."
“Hey! I could argue that it’s related! In fact -”
Dipper tunes out the rest of Bill’s ramble, rolling his eyes. Listening with half an ear to Bill's ongoing tirade about being a poorly kept man, and unappreciated in his time.
Despite how much he already has, Bill always wants more. Somehow he sniffed out Dipper’s latest excursion, showing up right at the end and looking for ‘loot’.
Which Dipper, by all rights, should prevent.
Anything magical falling into Bill's hands can cause chaos, no matter how innocuous it seems. The flower incident alone is reason not to hand Bill anything, ever, and the fact that Dipper still does sometimes should be appreciated, damn it.
Bill's complaining on and on, but whatever. Eventually he'll get bored.
In the meantime, Dipper turns the clay tablet around again with a frown. He found something interesting, at least.
Whatever this is, it’s definitely not a language he recognizes. The script is strange, scrawled in different directions. For all he knows he’s holding it upside down. He hopes Bill doesn’t notice until he’s figured out -
"Whatcha got there?" Just as expected - and right on time.
Dipper feels the tablet yanked out of his grasp, unfazed. He doesn't break his stride.
"I found it in the lair, after... you know." Charred bones, explosions - Dipper wishes he could use, like water, or something, but mastery over even one element is powerful as is. "Anyway, that monster was collecting a lot of weird magic stuff, and this was the only interesting thing it had." He shrugs. Then, because Bill will like it, adds, "So... to the victor go the spoils?"
“Now that’s the spirit!” Bill gives him a grin, holding the tablet up to squint at it. Thankfully not turning it around. One point for Dipper, on not looking incompetent.
Still, if anyone can read it…
“What language is this?” Dipper not-so-subtly leans over, trying to peek around Bill’s arm.
"Old Draconic," Bill says, without missing a beat. Humming to himself as he apparently reads the text. Perking up a bit, smile widening. "Oh, hey! Iambic pentameter."
"What does that mean?"
"Nothing, sapling. I just wish when people did the whole 'ancient poetry curse' thing, they'd get a little more creative. You never see hexameter! Or tetrameter! Not even a tasteful use of spondee.” Bill sticks his tongue out. "Come to think of it - I don’t think anyone’s done a prose epic that made the reader wanna tear their eyes out since Joyce."
Sometimes with Bill, you have to read between the lines. The long, irrelevant babbling lines.
"Just tell me if I need to get Ford or not." Dipper says, flat. He rubs at the bridge of his nose.
Among all the other stuff, Bill said ‘curse’. Never, ever a good sign.
Though the monster he just took down wasn’t a dragon, and that wasn’t really a ‘horde’ so much as something resembling the contents of the Mystery Shack, there’s absolutely no good thing about a curse. If Dipper somehow triggered it -
Great. As if hanging around Bill alone didn’t invite enough bad fortune, he’s picking up parts of his own stupid curiosity.
"Nah, don’t bother with the loser uncle!" Bill waves his concern away, amused. “This is just purple prose! Buncha ‘oooh, bad things’ll happen if you mess with my stuff.’ Totally boilerplate spellcraft with some flowery wording.”
With a shrug, Bill dismisses the whole thing. Which includes chucking the tablet over his shoulder, but Dipper manages to snag it before it falls and shatters into a million pieces.
“Typical dragon horde enchantment. All bluster, no burning.” Bill keeps walking without a care in the world. “They’re full of hot air!”
“So I’m not cursed,” Dipper prompts, catching up to him. “Aside from you, I mean.”
“Flatterer,” Bill says, slightly warmer. He continues, shrugging. “No reason you would be! No dragons in the area, and the warning sign there’s too old. By my guess, the original horde was raided centuries ago! Just another piece of random crap that got dragged into that junkyard." And he ruffles Dipper’s hair again, in the second-most annoying way. "You’re stuck with me, though.”
Dipper ducks and twists, thus freeing himself from the minor torment. “I think I can live with that.”
One would think that chatting with a demon - one as cryptic and ominous and aggravating as Bill - would only cause irritation, at best.
It still does, of course. But when it comes to Dipper, Bill… sometimes lays things out straight. On occasion. Especially when he’s instructing, doubly when it comes to magic. Like he’s trying to pour all the facts he can into Dipper’s brain, overfilling the cup.
If his goal is to overload this one mortal mind, though, he'll have to work a lot harder.
Dipper gets out his notebook, while Bill looks away, and pretends he didn’t see it. Yet another poorly-veiled lesson, with Bill obviously trying to plant seeds re: actually casting curses. Tough luck managing that. His subtle lean towards chaos might escape the unwary, but to Dipper? Bill’s way too transparent.
The fact is, that Dipper absorbs things fast. Even Bill will admit it, sometimes without being prompted.
That Includes stuff Bill doesn't even know he's teaching.
Bill’s also rambling on about historical curses, and how often these things backfire, or misfire. It’d almost sound like a series of unconnected, gossipy anecdotes, if it weren’t for the extra technical details.
And Dipper’s not falling for it. As far as he's concerned, his first curse was his last one.
But then…
Even if he’s not going to use the knowledge, there's no reason not to learn it. Knowledge about making curses can also be used to break them, after all. Taking all the facts Bill smacked a ‘For Evil Purposes Only’ sticker on and using them to shatter an evil plan would be very satisfying.
They’re nearly out of the cave at this point, so Dipper figures it’s fine to let his guard down a bit. The monster's dead, all the traps were cleared out on the way in - everything should be fine.
He clicks his pen a couple times, and asks Bill to repeat that last thing, about the life drain. It gets a snort of amusement, but Bill’s more than happy to elaborate at length. Dipper struggles to keep up with Bill’s rapid-fire speech; he's trying to make this intentionally difficult, damn it.
Bill leads on with careless gestures and an uninterrupted stride. Getting ahead of Dipper by several meters, but Dipper’s got to note down what he says before he has to do something awful, like ask Bill to repeat himself.
Dipper is, in fact, so busy trying to write in shorthand, and walk, and not hit a stalactite with his face, all at the same time, that he sort of loses track of where he is.
And okay, maybe he trips over a rock slightly, and nearly faceplants, bonking against the sudden curve of a wall with a swear.
Dipper takes a step back, rubbing at his forehead. Annoying, but, whatever. There were a few traps around, but he pretty much cleared out the cave on the way in, so it’s probably - oh, hell.
Not fine, he dropped the stupid tablet.
Great. The only really interesting object, shattered into half a dozen pieces. So much from saving it from Bill; Dipper himself fumbled the bag.
He backs up to evaluate the damage -
The stone sinks under his foot, and something goes ‘click’.
With a start, Dipper raises a shield without thinking, arm jerking up as he wills his magic into the gesture. It's solid enough for something done on reflex, but an impact hits hard on his side, with sudden, stinging pain.
And a pretty hard impact, at that. He didn’t get it solid enough, damn it, wasn’t expecting something physical -
Dipper wheezes out a breath, slumping to the ground and clutching his stomach.
Alright. So. He got most of the traps.
He sits down, and lets his head thump back against the stone, teeth bared in a grimace. Stupid. Should have been paying attention.
The commotion makes Bill turn his head, blinking at Dipper sitting on the ground.
Then - because he’s an asshole - he starts laughing.
“I know I’m fascinating, sapling, but really?” He tuts, setting fists on his hips. “Not sure if I should be flattered that you’re obsessed with me, or disappointed that you’re dumb enough to walk right into a wall.”
Dipper sucks in a breath, gingerly touching his side. Doesn’t seem like - he glances down. Sure, it stings, and his shirt’s torn, a long, shallow cut on his stomach, just near the old scar. But that’s about it. Over to his side, an arrow rolls against the ground, stone head clicking against the ground.
Over by the cave mouth, Bill’s cackling. God, he’s a jerk sometimes.
But he must not have seen the trap set off, too wrapped up in his own stupid bullshit, or he’d be less of one. Dipper knows that for a fact. Though he’d really, really prefer he’d never had that experience.
“C’mon, kid. If you’re not even more brain damaged from your bump, let’s ditch this joint.” Bill jerks his head over his shoulder.
Dipper hugs himself around the torso, grimacing. Not bothering to respond. His heart is still pounding, or he’d have a retort ready. Adrenaline’s helped him out in a lot of situations, but not with talking. He’ll get up when he’s ready.
“What, you smash your skull open or something?” Bill raises one arch eyebrow.
Though Dipper knows why Bill’s like this, it’s still deeply annoying. He shakes his head in lieu of a reply. In a second, he’ll be calm enough to tell Bill exactly what he thinks of his incredibly poor bedside - and cave-side - manner.
“Figures. Can’t leave you alone for five minutes without your guts spilling everywhere.” Bill clicks his tongue, folding his arms and stepping forward. “What’s the damage?”
“It hurts.” Dipper says, through gritted teeth. Then pauses. Wait, he meant to say - He shakes his head rapidly, only for more words to force themselves out, unbidden. “I got cut again.”
Again, not what he intended. Dipper lowers his chin, teeth clenched. What the hell, he shouldn’t have said that. Bill’s mocking aside, maybe he did hit his head a little too hard. Once Bill gets the mockery out of his system, he’s going to be a total pest about it, too.
With a huff, Dipper slumps. Settling in for a sulk, waiting for the next jab - But there’s no insult forthcoming. Or argument.
In fact, Bill’s gone totally silent. Which is super weird.
Dipper looks up at the cave entrance, expecting a comment or a question, or at least a huge grin. He tenses up, hunching over.
And meets a frozen, unsmiling face.
Bill dropped his arms, they hang limp by his sides. His expression’s gone blank.
The next moment, he’s right in front of Dipper, kneeling and tugging at his arms with alarming urgency.
“Alright, lemme see.” Bill’s face is very close. Though he’s trying to pull his arms away, Dipper resists out of sheer surprise. Bill growls, eye darting around until it lands on the arrow. “Oh for - Really can’t leave you alone for five minutes. Move.”
Another pull, less hard this time. Like he’s trying to ease Dipper’s arms away.
“Wh- Hey!” Dipper plants a foot against Bill’s chest, but that hardly stops anything. He raises his arms. Holding them up, in fact, like he’s at gunpoint. Where’d this come from. “Don’t get upset, I’m fine.”
“Ha! Good one, sapling. Who’s upset, exactly?” Bill says, teeth bared, and in a deeply upset way. He tugs Dipper’s shirt, up, fingers tracing the cut before pressing into his stomach. “I’m just wondering if I need a replacement mortal this soon into your miserable existence. No big deal!”
Okay, this is too much.
Dipper struggles up, despite Bill trying to shove him down again. Bracing himself on the cave wall, and glaring. “Calm down already.”
“I’m perfectly calm.” Bill says, through gritted teeth. At best he looks miffed, but he’s at least stopped trying to make Dipper lie down in the recovery position or whatever. With a glare, he tugs up Dipper’s shirt, prodding at the shallow cut. “What the hell, kid. I thought you said it hurt!”
“Ow.” Dipper’s stomach jumps at another poke. He smacks Bill’s hand away. “It does, alright? Quit poking.”
Bill doesn’t seem impressed. His fingers trail over the larger, older scar on Dipper’s left side, then glares at Dipper’s stomach like it’s insulted him. A beat, then - “You don’t usually complain.”
“I-” Okay, true. Dipper glares anyway. “Shut up.”
He doesn’t complain because it’s the only option. For all that Bill whines and teases and taunts Dipper, all the time, about being some ‘fragile mortal meatsack’, already rotting before his eyes, he really doesn’t like it when it’s brought forcefully to his attention.
God, he shouldn't have said anything. Ninety-five percent of the time, there isn’t any harm to mention. But when Dipper does ends up showing he is kind of… mortal, and it’s small, he just. Doesn’t bring it up. For all that they bicker all the time, he doesn’t like to make Bill upset.
Bill grunts, mouth turned down at the corners. He stands up quickly, folding his arms. His lip curls up in a sneer. “If you wanted attention, kid, there are way better ways to-”
Oh, fuck that. Dipper flips him off, and starts storming off.
God, this is stupid. Whenever Dipper ever breaks a bone or something, he gets teased about being so weak and vulnerable. Which he is, but neither of them like the reminder.
These days, it also comes with some weirdly maybe-sincere ‘kiss it better’ thing that Dipper then has to disinfect. A lot of hovering, and rambling commentary. Sometimes creative descriptions of how much worse it could have been, and Dipper never needed those, at any time. Bill gets oddly fixated on such random little moments, and it’s just -
Dipper doesn’t like it, is all. Bill gets the way he gets, it’s a lot, and it’s easier just to avoid it. If he were a different guy - a human guy, or even mostly-human monster- Dipper might try to talk to him about it.
But Bill’s a demon. Not normal, barely sane even on his best days, and worse, he’s Bill, so. That conversation would go precisely nowhere.
Behind him, he hears said demon approaching, fast. Stupid jerk. He should be as tall as his real form. That’d be fair. More accurate, too, and then Dipper could properly stomp off without Bill catching up so easily.
Already the bastard is by Dipper’s side. A tall, irritating presence. Hovering close without grabbing on, which adds to said irritation.
Dipper leans away, but Bill catches him around the waist and drags him in.
“Don’t get so grumpy, sapling, you’re fine! A little nick in the outer layer rarely killed anyone since they invented antibiotics.” Though he pinches Dipper’s cheek, he yanks his head away with a grunt. Bill sighs. “Everything’s a-okay here! Looks like I don't have to find a replacement just yet.”
Bill’s an idiot. Dipper scoffs, though an unpleasant feeling crawls in his gut. “Oh yeah? Who would you replace me with?”
“Eh, not like I got anyone specific in mind.” Bill waves that off, nonchalant. “But I have options! Lots of options.” He bumps a hip against Dipper. “Keep that in mind before you go charging off into obvious traps.”
This goddamn liar. Dipper elbows him in the side, because the asshole deserves it.
Not that Dipper’s worried, or anything. From what little he’s heard of Bill’s exes in the demonic rumor mill - Bill’s been, as they say, less than successful. Already Dipper’s outstripped his longest by years.. Bill can lie day in and day out about his options, put on a brave face - but they both know he’s not going to find this again. Not easily.
“Good luck finding another husband, asshole.” Dipper says with appropriate derision. It’s annoying that Bill even brought it up. There’s a good riposte in there, somewhere - but while his brain is coming up with an insult, his mouth runs on automatic. “But I was really worried that you would last week. I couldn’t stop thinking about it all day until you sent a dick pic. It was weirdly comforting.”
Bill turns toward him with genuine surprise. He even blinks a few times, no retort emerging, and Dipper looks back at him with equal surprise.
Until his mind catches up with what he just said.
Dipper digs his heels in the ground, slamming to a halt. Clapping both hands to his mouth, eyes wide.
Beside him Bill nearly trips at the sudden stop, flailing for balance with a swear.
Shit, shit shit. Dipper really didn’t mean to say that. He knows Bill’s not looking around, that he’s not interested. Cynically, that he couldn’t manage it if he was. Last week was just a one-off anxiety, like all the others Dipper’s brain comes up with when it gets too much free time. Totally irrational, and really hard to stop fixating on.
Bill keeps staring. Not angry, just confused, for long enough that Dipper wants to shrink into the ground and melt into nothingness.
Then he asks, “What the hell, Pine Tree?”
“I don’t know! I don’t know why I thought that. I don’t know why I said that.” Dipper cringes into himself, grimacing and ducking his head. He runs a hand over his slightly sweaty face. “I didn't even want you to know I got hurt.”
At that, Bill snorts. “Oh, please. I’d have seen that first time I got your shirt off. You can’t keep secrets from me!”
Dipper folds his arms, internally seething - and his stupid mouth moves to say, “I’ve done it before.”
This time, the silence is tense.
Dipper wipes his sweating forehead again, not daring to meet Bill’s eye. God he shouldn't have -
Before he can think, he blurts out, “I think something’s wrong.”
“Probably!” Bill agrees, with a smile just a little too sharp. He takes Dipper’s face in both hands, eye narrowed. “Hold still a sec.”
As Bill’s eye flickers blue, and the magic between them surges - Dipper squirms a bit, but. Well. If anything’s wrong with him - magically, anyway - Bill’s the best one to diagnose it..
Bill tilts his head to one side, then the other. After a moment, his mouth twists up into something unpleasant, eye glowing slightly brighter for an instant.
Then he sighs, and lets Dipper go. His expression is neutral, except for the slightest downturn of his mouth. His lips part like he’s about to speak, then twist up into a grimace.
Uh oh.
Whatever Bill saw, he didn’t like it.
“What?” Dipper pats his head, then his chest. If there was something weird, magically about him, he - wouldn’t be able to tell, actually. He’s too close to get a good look. Oh god, what if he did hit his head too hard, and something in his brain is bleeding, or worse. “Wait. Am I dying?”
“Worse! You’re telling the truth.” Bill claps his hands together. Though he’s smiling again, it’s brittle and annoyed. “Don’t suppose you know any curse breakers that aren’t your great-uncle?”
“Not really,” Dipper admits. Bill's words catch up to him, and he bites his lip. Then, because the situation deserves it, “Fuck.”
Protection curse. The tablet.
Damn it.
A part of a horde, from a long time ago. Messed with. It should have been something less awful. Like warts, or sprouting plants from his skin, or a big fireball. Pretty much anything else would be less awful.
Truth curses are rare, they’re difficult as hell - but judging by the words spilling out of Dipper, he’s caught a pretty strong variant.
Of all the curses that could hit him. Why this one.
Hell, maybe it’s intended to be the worst curse possible for the ‘thief’. That would explain how targeted this feels.
And knowing Dipper’s luck, that part was explained on, like, the back of the tablet.
“Welp! Good thing I’m not short on contacts, kid.” Bill grapes his shoulder, shaking him a bit, before he trails an arm over Dipper’s shoulders. “Who wants some fumbling idiot uncle to fix this kinda spell, anyway?”
Dipper would! If it was feasible. He makes a brief attempt at shrugging Bill’s arm up before letting his shoulders slump.
The idea of Ford hearing about this is….
Dipper sucks in a breath through his teeth.
Ford really would have a way around this. He'd certainly have the best intentions, Dipper’s certain. He'd...
Also not have the best sense of boundaries.
Though he'd be doing it for the right reasons, he'd ask the wrong questions. Out of concern, and arguably valid worry; he's never fully believed that Bill can't influence him. Despite how many times Dipper’s tried to explain it to him, Ford just can’t wrap his mind around certain truths.
With this curse, though. Between poor social sense, the Pines curiosity, and what Dipper might blurt out, while compelled to answer -
On this, Dipper agrees with Bill. They’ll have to find something else to break this.
In the meantime, he’ll manage, like he has all the other times his life has sucked. Hardly the worst case scenario. If Bill had been cursed - someone who lies like he breathes - Who knows? Give it a few days, and he might just explode from all the backed up bullshit.
“Wait.” A horrible thought strikes. Dipper reels on his husband, eyes wide. “Are you okay?”
“What, me? I’m a perfectly moral human man,” Bill says, resting a hand on his chest, lifting his chin with pride. “A boring sentient mammal who’s never found curses entertaining.”
Yep, Bill’s fine. As always, it’s Dipper who gets the short end of the stick.
He breathes in slowly, and lets it out.
Yeah. Still sucks. He’ll deal. Cursed, but not dead. In danger, but not the worst - and his husband’s being annoying, which means he’s perfectly fine. There’s a solution too - it’s just going to be a huge, annoying process getting to it.
“So,” Bill says, slowly. Drawing the word out in a long string, while he finger-walks his arm up around Dipper’s shoulder.
Uh oh.
Speaking of annoying…
“Watch it,” Dipper hunches his shoulders, not daring to look his idiot husband in the eye. “You’re this close to sleeping on the couch for a month.” Not a big enough threat, Bill’s still thinking- “Or for a year.”
“Oh, sure,” Bill says, in a distracted tone. His fingers pause on their walk, one ‘leg’ poised on Dipper’s clavicle. They hold the position for a long moment, tapping out a little marching step - and seconds later, his palm slaps down on Dipper’s shoulder. “So, Pine Tree! How do you feel about this ‘Bill Cipher’ guy?”
Though Dipper resists, and he really tries to, the words slip out past his teeth, his lips form the sounds -
“I love you.” God. Damnit. He clenches his fists, as Bill’s sheer smugness radiates from him like heat. “And I’m thinking about shoving you off a cliff right now.”
When Bill paused, Dipper thought he might have fended this off. Wishful thinking, really, Bill’s almost impossible to stop. Dipper used what leverage he had, but all he’s managed to avoid are the worst, most invasive questions.
When it comes to Bill, that’s pretty close to a win.
Not that it’s going to feel like one.
Bill has, in fact, been encouraged. Now that he’s heard something he likes, he leans in like a weird creep. Dipper can practically hear the leer in his voice. “And on a scale of one to ten, how handsome am I?
“Ten point five,” Dipper needs to loosen his jaw or he might break a filling. Being pumped for information is bad enough without pumping up Bill’s already ridiculous ego. “You bastard.”
Bill’s chest puffs out, there’s a strut in his stride. The grin is so wide now Dipper’s pretty sure it should hurt- and if he dares to pucker up, he’s not getting lips on his awful face. “And am I the most clever and sexually amazing guy in the universe or what?
This time, Dipper snorts.
“Definitely not.” He ignores the sharp, indignant sound next to him, tilting his head in thought. “For one, there’s succubi and incubi, so. Sexually, you’re not even on top amongst demons.” He glances over at the offended ‘o’ of Bill’s mouth. “And I know you’re not the most clever, because I win our debates nearly half the time. Maybe you’re up there, but not the most. And that’s just the surface level stuff.”
Dipper doesn’t have a complete cosmological view of the multiverse, but he has learned a lot. Mostly stuff he picked up from his husband, and demonic gossip. It’s absolutely enough to go on a long, long ramble about how Bill most likely doesn’t rank number one in anything. If Dipper avoids the topics where he actually is.
He’s barely fifteen seconds in before Bill starts scowling, with a grumpy hunch to his shoulders - But screw him.
Dipper starts smiling, just a bit. Then, to be a dick, he adds,
“The ten and a half is just me, anyway. To the average human, you’re maybe an eight..” Dipper continues, over another spluttered protest. Again, true; not everyone likes the slightly inhuman maniac cyclops look. “Six with your personality.”
Bill groans. “Ugh, you pedant.” He squeezes Dipper’s shoulder, jostling him slightly. “C’mon, you know what I meant! What’s the real - “
“Don’t ask questions if you can’t handle the answers,” Dipper warns, jabbing Bill in the chest. So far it hasn’t been too much, but it could be. Time to draw a line. “I will suck so much fun out of this for you.”
Bill Cipher, unintentional teacher once more. Now Dipper knows the curse isn’t about perfect truth. When he can deliberately misinterpret a question’s intent, and can go on tangents - that means he has loopholes. There might even be more, if he tries.
And if they can’t get this settled soon, he’ll need every one of those he can find.
“Clever brat.” Bill’s frowning, but he can’t disguise the amusement in his voice. His eyebrows wiggle, his arm hauling him close - "Go ahead, then. Anything else you wanna share?"
"I know two and half ways to kill you, Bill Cipher." Dipper gets right up in his face. He won’t let Bill push this any further. "Don't tempt me to use them."
Being face to face like this, Dipper watches Bill’s eye go wide - ha, didn’t expect that, did he. With that threat, he’ll -
Start cackling. And weirdly, turn a little pink. Dipper feels all the momentum he had whoosh out of him like sad balloon animal.
“Boy, you are a saucy one!” Bill whistles, low. He places his hands demurely on his cheeks, fluttering his eye at Dipper with amusement. “Oh, yeah. Talk deadly to me.”
By this time, Dipper figures he should be used to stumbling into demonic flirtation. Only it turns out it’s basically fractal in nature, and he keeps running into new and newer edge cases.
“Fun as this is - we gotta get you cleared up, and no time like the present!” Bill’s calmed down enough to scoop an arm around his waist, leading Dipper onward. “Can’t have you babbling everything to everyone, y’know?”
“What, you don’t want me telling you everything?” Total bullshit. Dipper elbows him in the side. “I thought you wanted to get in my head.”
“Hey! I didn’t ask for our game to be set on ‘beginner’ mode. That’s boring.” Bill flicks his fingers - but he’s got his ‘evading questions’ look on. “You’re lucky I’m so- oof.”
Another elbow, harder this time. Bill grunts, but capitulates. Rubbing at his eye briefly, he sighs.
“So! How many of my secrets would you say you know, Pine Tree?” Bill tightens his grip on Dipper’s waist, tugging him closer. “And I’m talking about the ones that I wouldn’t enjoy getting out in the world.”
“More than I can count.” Dipper says without thinking. Then, with thinking - “Oh.”
Dipper hadn’t considered how much Bill’s taught him, before this exact moment. How much he’s learned. Even unintentionally. Especially unintentionally.
Crap, even his threat before was kind of -
Shit. There’s definitely, absolutely, no way can they go to Ford about this. Total recipe for disaster.
“See? We both got liabilities in play here.” Bill moves easily as Dipper picks up the pace. If anything he’s amused, and not feeling nearly as urgent. Another reason he’s an idiot. “All we gotta do is get you patched up quick, and no more loose lips sinking ships! Easy-peasy.”
“It better be,” Dipper mutters. Nothing ever goes right for him. And by extension, them.
“Trust me, kid! I got this handled!” Bill snaps his fingers - and smacks Dipper’s butt with a wink. “I know some guys!”
#answers#Not my best work but I haven't posted in a while so here's a thing!#I will get better at writing I swear#There are references to the whump fic in this just so you know#It is canon that Dipper didn't die but the how and the aftermath are for the sequel#Anyway whump sequel is going decent and I have some ideas for other stuff#Don't worry Dipper Ford wouldn't even think to ask you the questions you're worried about#He assumes that Bill would never ever let you know those facts#And technically Bill never told Dipper either of those two and a half ways but you learn a lot from being married for a few years#I don't have any more interesting tag facts other than that don't expect a timely sequel to this because I have so much stuff to complete#I hope it's at least fun to read!
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why do you hate Joshua Graham or Honest Hearts so much?
This DLC and character represents a bigger issue with fandom spaces I have but particularly fallout fandom in general.
Fallout tends to tackle a lot of topics controversial and not. The first two games it’s heavy cause they are the most satirical and direct with how anti-war, nationalism and etc… they are. 3 loses this as it’s very clear once you play or learn about all the games that Todd and a bunch of guys at Bethesda just liked the 50s post apocalyptic aesthetic and refuse to actually critique the ideals of the time period like the earlier titles.
New Vegas is the game that really gets back into it a degree it almost seems like it’s taking too much on. There are things done exceedingly well while other things are done horribly wrong . I’ve made posts about it before and plan to make a big series of posts (it’s a lot of writing) but my biggest gripe is with Honest Hearts and all the gross and white savior esque depictions it has of indigenous peoples. The entirety if FNV does not do the injustices faced by indigenous people correctly on any count. My two biggest complaints are with the Khans and the tribes in Zion but I’ll talk about the former on a different post.
Both characters of Daniel and Joshua are the most accurate depiction of white saviors I’ve seen and I hate how the DLC tries to justify and defend them. The DLC treats Joshua like this man who has repented for his past actions when he is just retracing his steps after his cruelty bit him in the ass. He was one of the worst parts of the Legion and it is all but explicitly stated that if you don’t force him to be non-violent he will turn the tribes of Zion into the legion 2.0. The Dead Horses and the Sorrows are horribly infantilized by both Daniel and Joshua who both use them for self serving purposes guised by religious duty. The White Legs are the horrible stereotype of violent and savage indigenous and I personally think a lot of their interlinking with Ulysses, his hair and Ulysses character in general are distasteful and very telling of how BIPOC or POC where involved.
But outside of the game it’s the weird obsession people have with these characters ideologies and trying to make them seem more interesting/philosophical than they are. Tumblr is an echo chamber and many fans of Fallout are not the people on this site. Many people are not educated in the issues these characters convey and how poorly they do or used these characters as a poor introduction for their takes. Contrary to what a lot of people believe in, fallout has a prediomeny white cis male fanbase. More importantly a large portion of the fanbase is white.
You can joke how FNV made you trans or see the numbers on post/fics or diverse headcanons but these are kiddy numbers compared to the millions that consume the franchise and aren’t in those more aware spaces or don’t engage in the spaces the same way someone like me does/has to. Their views shape a lot more than people realize and it’s exhausting to be in a space where people don’t correct the more subtle yet toxic aspects of it but also adopt them into some weird quirky view point on the characters or issues. Some people don’t realize and some people don’t care.
My main issue is just the idolizing of these sort of thing in this fandom space and people try to acts like a game like fallout whose tagline is “War never changes” and has never had a game not revolve around political or militaristic factions issues isn’t that deep or doesn’t relate to real issues. I think it’s mainly caused by how over powered you can become and how you can strong arm your way past these learning moments as majority of people who play this game do play it as a power fantasy where they can do so as they please (which of course, go ahead it’s fun) but never take in parallels or lessons in the story as if it was just another first person shooter.
Also like another personal gripe is Cazadores spawn like hell whenever I’m there and I have not found a mod that works to mod them out so I have to play Indigenous Racism the DLC while getting jumped by giant wasps WHILE helping Mormons. Like I cannot catch a break.
#I’m mostly silly or character headcanon focused on this blog#but sometimes I forget some people literally have never interacted with someone slightly outside of their ideologies or don’t learn about#philosophies that don’t pertain to their view point and actively block them out#and so I have like a meltdown and occasionally post about it cause like I see more people hate Danse for regurgitating BoS teachings than#hate Joshua Graham who helped found the legion participated in their practices and still has this weird bloodlust#like make it make sense why do you like this white man genuinly like outside of his aesthetic#I can say silly shit about them hit it’s always I think it’s surreal they even exist while others genuinely wish they did so they could fix#them and some of all don’t realize how quickly jokes lead people down rabbit holes and pipe lines cause ur not gonna see posts even pitying#that man in here#like when I defend Danse it is through the signs and events in game that show he is not stuck in his ways and possibly only adopted those#beliefs because of his tramatic events with super mutants and the bos being very anti anything not human#their are affinity reaction that concern this while Joshua like moans yes when killing the white legs and is always polishing his gun goon#pile like I’ve learned too much about him the Mormon faith and that dlc to be told I’m playing favorites he is not fixable or repentent#this fandom has one of the worst issues of he’s my fave so he can’t do wrong when some of this characters are literal unapologetic rapist#racists or individuals who condone or perpetuate like ideas and concepts like obviously I’m gonna not like them????!#like I still think it’s interest to dissect them and I try so hard to not be a hypocrite but sometimes it’s like the whole this is just a#fun thing for you but like be aware of what you are taking in and reflect like is so important fiction can slowly seep into your morals#I’m rambling and losing track of shit so imma stop here before I reach the tag limit but again dm and ask cause this is the stuff I will#blab about#horrible at normal conversation tho#fallout#fallout new vegas#joshua graham#honest hearts#ask#anon#fallout 3
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Hi y'all, I just wanted to talk a little about the behind the scenes of what I've been up to, to give y'all a little transparency and to open myself up for any tips or input! 🙏 Thank you for your continued support and for taking the time to look at my art 🫶
First and foremost I wanted to give some transparency about my art capacity.
As og followers may remember, I started this blog when I was doing art full time. Eventually my living expenses grew and I had to go back to work. I find myself in a cycle of "I'll make more art soon, once I get a job!" And "I'll make more art soon, once I am done with this job!" I lost my most recent job suddenly, having had an extension waved over my head until the last day(October 7th). Now I'm excited to have more time for art, but I am also feeling a rush to get a new job ASAP as I've been living paycheck to paycheck. I dream of doing this work full time, I'm just scared it's not quite there yet and I worry that I come off as scammy or dishonest when I anticipate more stability around the corner.
Second, I've been struggling with the Patreon. It's taken me a while to come to terms with this, but from what I've seen Patreon is not intuitive at all from the creator end. It doesn't do a good job of organizing addresses, emails, showing who or who isn't subscribed to me, or organizing and displaying the work I put on there. I've been really shocked by this experience, since lots of big names use Patreon. It's been a great way to streamline support, but it's been unhelpful in every other regard. I would like to continue using it, but I will most likely post more wips or process videos there in the future.
Which brings me to my third point, zines. I love making zines so much, it feels personal and fulfilling and fun! However the Patreon issues make it harder to keep information in order about where to send zines, or even where to message folks about them. In addition to this, the post office has been a big barrier to me, oftentimes only being open at the same time as my dayjob. Making zines can take days, then sending them out is a whole other monster.
This work is so important to me. Drawing peoples fantasies, representing body types, creating work around sexuality and the human experience feels like what I'm meant to do. I've made comics since I was a kid. This is the dream to me. The friends I've been able to make through this work are so important to me, and the conversations have been invaluable. Not to mention fun! I wanna doodle, I wanna draw hot stuff, I wanna thirst over these dudes! I want to play!
But I also just want to be transparent about the barriers I'm working around to share that experience. I'm completely self taught, both in art AND in running shops, building websites, running 8 accounts, etc. I take a lot of time to learn the logistics of these things, and try to make them make sense for my relationship with y'all (I do not want to paywall my art!! I don't want to!!!). This year my desktop broke down (the main one I use for all paintings and digital art). I've paused my Etsy shops and my Patreon to try to catch up with things. Trying to learn to paint in a completely different program. Then lost my job with no savings.
At the end of the day I don't want anything to come between me sharing my art with you. I wish I could doodle a thing, take a picture, and post it here. No third party site, no shop, no subscription. Just sharing my art with you. I promise I'm trying to figure out how to stay as close to that as possible, and I want to thank y'all for sticking with me as I untangle all of that.
So, what can you expect in the near future?
I'm working on a couple of painting commissions right now, which you should be able to see in the next couple of days! I want to catch up on kinktober and get those posted as well. There's a comic commission in progress which I'm very eager to work on, and which I think y'all will be excited for! To ease the weight of the Patreon I think I may do less zines/polls there and more wips and process videos! If possible, I want to do more full colored work too.
Thank you again for enjoying my work, and if you have any input or tips my inbox is always open 🙏🫶💕
#long post#info#marco lore#i wish i had time to edit this and make it nice#i just wanted to be open with yall about how much work this takes and that im trying to make it more doable#i don't want to overpromise stuff with patreon or shops and if im late sending stuff i never ever want it to come off as intentional or mali#malicious or as a scam#im just trying very hard to like ...survive. financially. and then trying to make all the logistics of thos big machine work. and then keep#up with commissions and shops and printing and mailing#god i wish i had employees but jts just me#i hand draw everything and then post it here to the word press to the ig and crop and caption and tag#then to the Patreon if it makes sense to or to the tiktok back in the day#and the formatting is all different#and i get messages across all of these platforms and I'm trying to learn a new way of painting on the fly#on top of that im supposed to be running my two Etsy shops too which im not right now because..broadly gestures#my nervous system can only take losing a job so often. the rug was really pulled feom under me in this one. i thought id have more time#i don't want to sound like I'm whining and i don't want to give up on all of this#i want to be very very very clear that art is what i love and who i am and what i want to do#i want to be posting on the daily again#i just need to evaluate what that looks like everytime life changes#I'm seriously so grateful for those of y'all that have joined the Patreon or bought stuff from the shop i really don't mean to drop the ball#so many times#y'all have literally been the difference between me making rent or not and I'm so worried that i don't make enough art to give back to that#relationship#im trying my best#okay anyways im posting this
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taking a break from my animatic to draw self insert spongebob best friendship joy
#my stuff#ocs#spongebob#spongebob fanart#furry art#idrk how to tag this one#anyways i love him this is maybe the most cringe thing ive ever drawn (/awesome)#i was listening to fnaf music the whole time too. love is real#if spongebob was real I think we would be besties#also have never drawn him sorry guys hes really fucking hard to draw#ill learn one day
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little rich boy sirius who gets disowned and can barely survive without his expensive brands and the basic human need to eat at least once a day meeting the entirely too generous james potter who just falls for the vanity and sincerity of the reformed rich boy and decides that once sirius stops caring about brands and status and rich boy things and just cares about what matters in life he decides to spoil his boyfriend to pieces because he’s secretly sitting on a fucking fortune
#idk i just think it’s funny#like james would find sirius when he’s struggling with money because he’s so bad at saving and prioritising his spendings because he’s never#had too before and so james would teach him how to do all that stuff and emotionally support sirius through it all and sirius just falls in#love with this beautiful guy who’s just so generous and who teaches him so many things and finds value in kindness and sincerity and#compassion and all that jazz and james falls in love with sirius helplessly because he might be stuck up and vein and kind of selfish and#is stuck up and cares all too much about status but he’s trying so hard to be better and he finds empathy because sirius got kicked out for#the worst reasons because he’s always been the black sheep of his highly cultist christian family or whatver and he’s also outwardly queer#and james decides that he wants to give sirius everything and loves the way he looks in expensive makeup and designer faux fur coats and#heels and divine jewellery and all that jazz but makes sirius sell it all and learn what it means to be human and not rely on money and#status and brands and stuff and sirius learns what it’s like to be decent and in touch with humanity and only then does james take sirius on#a surprise luxury holiday for his birthday or something and then just buys him thousands of dollars worth of all these glamorous looking#things and sirius is like omg what the fuck jamie and then he just becomes sirius’ sugar daddy because he can’t help himself but they’re#also in love and much better people because of it and when sirius buys things now it’s not because of brands or because they have big price#tags like he used too. he now buys things with james’ credit card he keeps in his own wallet because he thinks he’ll feel pretty in them or#because he thinks james will loose it if he sees sirius walking around in it or if he sees a really cute toaster that sends him into a#frenzy that has him spending all way too much on an impromptu kitchen renovation but james doesn’t care because as long as his boyfriend is#happy and actually paying attention to the price of things and calculating the best value and taking james’ opinion as well and just being#happy and safe and accepted in his new home and family here with his jamie#please i think they’d be so cute ugh!!!#prongsfoot#bambibelle#drabble#fic idea#marauders#james potter#sirius black#jay talks
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[Start ID. A drawing of @mieczmaszyna 's character Izzy. In the words of its creator, Izzy is a humanoid robot with a white chassis, oval head, black headset, square green glasses, claws, and a tail resembling a cable plug. Ai wears a cowboy hat, vest decorated by a star and bottle cap, pants with tassels, spurred boots, and a red bandanna. He's viewed from the side, kicking up one leg and holding both arms out in front of itself to shoot finger guns, looking excited and rather jaunty. The background is a dull yellow-green, muddied by the warm reddish tone of the drawing, and in paler green are the words "BANG BANG!!" by ais arms. End ID]
robot cowboy!!!
#peridots-art#bots#others' ocs#izzy#mieczmaszyna#gotta admit doing all the shading here was. very fun. insert medic hoo noise#i don't know if people usually read these but @ the intended recipient of this post! if you are!!#i remember first liking your art a year ago (actually only about a week off now lol) when it crossed my dash for the first (/only) time#and then found it again whilst enjoying the funky robot dudes (yesm/p03) and their respective games and I fell in Love with your style#i also was always enthused by the number of my fixations that you also liked! fnv! insc! ultkll! tf2 and hylics which i've never played!#and then there's hk which has been my most prominent special interest for close to two years so. safe to say that was. AWESOME to see#ALSO ALSO!! i think we may be like. mutuals-in-law*2??#by which i mean one of my two closest friends on this site (holly) is mutuals with a cool artist (sodapop)#who i learned by accident that you've sent asks to before. either way it's cool :]#reserving the caption 'robot cowboys my beloved' for the future cause there are too many! victor and p03 and my own guy atoya and now this?#it is a wonderful problem. anyway i'm also looking at P3RI and realizing how many traits they and izzy share by accident lol#think. that should be all the tags (see: incoherent rambling). really like your stuff and have been meaning to draw something for you for#a while just got nervous 👍
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hey guys so I just started reading Flatland by Edwin A. Abbott and OMG AHSBNSBSBSNSNBSHZHSHDBFHGGHFHGRJ2KSHSBSNSK AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA I LOVE THINKING ABOUT THE RELATIVITY BETWEEN DIMENSIONS!!!!!!
#probably the nerdiest thing i will ever read in my entire life but I AM SO HAPPY#Its the unabridged and corrected 1992 republication btw. if you wanna get specific#the only book in which i have actually decided to read the introductory notes and i do NOT regret it because the editor's one IMMEDIATELY#brought up the “oh but surely the second dimension has thickness how else would flatlanders see anything” AND GAVE A REALLY GOOD ANSWER.#which i cannot tell you here. bc it is several paragraphs long and idk how i would shorten it. i would hit tag limit. if thats a thing.#anyways. I'm only a little bit into the first part which basically explains how Flatland works as a society so i haven't even gotten to the#sphere yet but OH MAN I HAVE NEVER BEEN SO EXCITED ABOUT A ROUND OBJECT IN MY LIFE#IM LOSING IT OVER THIS BOOK AAAA :D#me: im so glad i dont have a math class during my senior year! now i dont have to learn anything math-related!#also me: but what if i started studying a complex and almost entirely theoretical part of geometry#bc YEAH i didn't just buy this book bc of gravity falls. I BOUGHT IT BC IVE BEEN RESEARCHING THE 4TH DIMENSION WOOOOOOO!!!!!#one thing i will say i dont like. introductory note suggests the the 4th dimension might be time. this is ok tho bc its followed up with#also saying that time is not a spatial dimension and exist across the 0 1st 2nd and 3rd dimensions which. that epuld mean we live in 4d#already. so. i was worried for a second but THANK YOU THANK YOU OH MY GOD PEOPLE TRYING TO SAY “OH THE 4TH DIMENSION IS TIME” I HATE THAT SO#MUCH AAAAGGHHHH AT LEAST RECOGNIZE ITS NOT SPATIAL!!! TIME IS NOT A SPATIAL DIMENSION!!!!!!! IF IT WAS THEN 4D TRAVEL AND TIME TRAVEL WPULD#BE FHE SAME THING AND DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY MUCH COOLER POSSIBILITIES WPULD BE THROWN AWAY IF THAT WAS THAT CASE!!!!! AND. AND. IF THE 4TH#DIMENSION IS TIME. THEN WHATS THE 5TH?? 6TH?? YPU CANT KEEP GOINF ON FOREVER LIKE THAT. YPURE JUST MAKEING MORE 3D WORLSS WITH STUFF IN#ADDITION TO TIME. INTERESTING BUT THAY IS NOT ABOHT HIGHRER DIEMSBSJSNSBAKAJSHDHDHHDHDHDJ#sorry for the rant. jsut. agh i want a spatial 4th dimension. i dont think tesseracts exist through time that would just be an aged cube#anyways yeahhh i love the 4th dimension. new hyperfixation or new special interest? ill have to wait and see. anyways i have done it i have#an oc whos 4 dimensional now and she is the coolest ever i love her#but yeah this book is sosososo good i am literally gonna bring it to school to read instead of draw bc i would lose it if i didn't#10/10 would recommend to anyone who wants to Think
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