#i must push thru
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his white boy swag ^
#chat#posting just to post. the 2nd one is older than the 1st. which is y the sizes r different but i must push thru#-> cringing at the different resolutions
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It's funny how "you just need to be uncomfortable to grow and growing is a good thing that you should try to do in your life" is considered a "boomer-like" statement and how many people will genuinely respond with "sure but it's also valid if you don't want to do hard and uncomfortable things!"
DISCLAIMER: OBVIOUSLY THERE'S NUANCE
#'i mean i guess i see what youre saying but it's just so hard!' ok then stay where u are ig#like. you can#it doesnt make you less than. doesnt make u a bad person.#but you MUST understand if you refuse the choice to grow then others WILL outgrow you#they'll leave. they'll move on.#same with opportunities. they'll pass you by.#and if ur ok w that then that's fine it's ur life#but again. understand that other people will probably grow away from you. and they wont be wrong for it.#you wont be wrong for not growing either.#i think ppl get defensive because they have shame around not being where they feel theg 'should' be in life and i do get that#but at a certain point u rlly do have to get up and dig urself out of that hole..no matter how u got there#it's hard and it sucks and everyone has different circumstances but no one else is gonna save u or get u out#u gotta do it urself#u can start whenever#but the longer u say 'i'll do it when im ready' well..#sometimes u never feel ready...u just have to push thru and do it#:'/#i have sympathy but. idk i have thoughts too lol
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working on my final paper rn so remind me later but. stoner bf vernon fic soon perhaps
#[💒] — june.txt#wanna write SO BAD but i am already pushing the deadline on this research paper so it must wait </3#this is my last assignment for the semester so once it's done i am free to write !!#also going thru my masterlist i was surprised i dont have any stoner vern fics i thought i did#this thot is partially brought to you by my friend who keeps asking me to go to a hookah bar with her
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Your writing is actually like so good like i literally can't do that stuff even tho I have written for God knows how many years atp like,,, HOW?? I COULDNT EVEN COME UP WITH A SIMPLE COMPLIMENT AND YET YOU WROTE
“Your eyes glow like the cresting of the sun over the horizon, painting the world in hues of gold – yet it also reminded me of the dipping of the moon below the waves, casting the briefest, most gentle of lights upon the world engulfed in darkness. In the depths of your eyes was the birth and death of stars in the infinite cosmos – glittering stars in a sea of empty, blank space that left me feeling lightheaded and breathless.” - even the gods bleed [pt 2]
JSHDHDJDJDN THANK YOU???? I worry all the flowery language feels awkward but i am a sucker for things like that i shove it into every fic i can..glad 2 know yall like it 🏃♂️
im also just incredibly dramatic. it's a careful balance between being descriptive enough to get my themes across but not enough to alienate any readers and if I can't describe colors then I'm going to be a menace to society and describe it in the most vague way possible. enjoy ur 500 word description of a plate /j
#asks#anon#like. i try to avoid mentioning specific characteristics (hair color eye color skin color hair type etc)#but also ensure the general theme of what im trying to convey gets across#like in the part of my fic you mentioned (etheral and otherworldly. a disconnect between humanity and reader)#both from the perspective of the acolytes and from the reader.#almost. whimsical. unnatural. out of place.#reader is the divine but they do not belong there.#i try to be vague with readers personality as well (unless specifically requested otherwise)#but i want there to be an unease. an unatural stillness.#sort of like that feeling when you see something that looks human but its. wrong in a way. in a way you cannot describe#there is something wrong and you do not know what. you know that you must run#so a vague level of horror at play um. but lowkey eldritch horror reader is my fav soooooo#i need reader to be freaking out their acolytes but pushing thru it bc why would they be afraid of their creator? of the divine?#but that feelings of wrongness lingers at the back of their mind every time they are near#also adding to it that i dont really describe about readers eyes is that it. moves#like. whenever readers eyes move so does the view of the stars/planets/galaxies moves with it.#not in the sense that the stars themselves move. but rather that like a camera the focus has been shifted.#and now they are seeing entirely new stars and galaxies.#pats reader this bad boy can fit so much eldritch horror beyond human comprehension in them!#wow this got off topic fast um.#oop 🏃♂️
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Why did no one tell me theres like 24 hours worth of hatchetfield lore from starkid that ive gotta catch up on now
#just watched nerdy prudes must die and im SO GLAD i pushed thru the kinda cringey opening number cuz it was amazing#the guy who played max fucking crushed it they dont even get guys that committed on broadway
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i have a punk rock concert tonight three tours to give tomorrow and then after work i’m going to amsterdam to see my old roommate. come tuesday i am going to crash so hard but this weekend is going to be so much fun
#i need to psych myself up tbh cause i’m a bit tired#but must push thru cause i know it’s gonna be great lol#personal#considering my last reblog this is kinda a funny post to make lol
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i feel like i have so many things i wanna write but my fingers feel extra heavy wenever i open a draft 2 start …
#ʚ・◞📎 — em entry.#like i can’t lift them ITS TOO MUCH ! but my drafts are so full </3#grrrrrr i must do it ! I MUST PUSH THRU !#after work tho >x< !
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hello good morning (afternoon) I am!! going to try to be here today actually. I tried last night but passed the fucky out bc ya boys been EXHAUSTED but!! I'm gonna be focusing on trying to finish the vagrant's blog i think for now. idk what I'll be doing with him or how but hgdfugfd that is the fun of playing with him. uwu get to flesh him out more <3
#( ooc )#( tbd )#I !! hesitate to give the url out bc i want ppl to read the info right off the bat and not providing it#upon first showing the blog i feel like makes it easier to forget / just not think of it (?? idk ?? my brain) so i just!! i must push thru#my own impatience with myself hyHGFDHGF#its!! just about there tbh. i might do the same thing with the muse info that i did for ccnfessional ?? idk#how ?? that looks (not pretty at all but it IS easily accessible!)#ANYWAY#im [makes fart noises] thats my brain rn but i will persevere gdfghfgj
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rather than doing anything meaningful w/my layout tonight, i went down a rabbit hole trying to find the exact source of a font a similar project uses, only for it to not even be as good as the one i was using 😑 bro…….
#my biggest problem w/web fonts is there’s no way to anti-alias them across all browsers & operating systems :/#mac os & i believe Linux can do it? and WebKit ones but u see. i use Firefox which isn’t supported for anti-aliasing 😒#and i mean it’s not the Biggest Problem but it does make fonts - esp pixel fonts!!!!!! - end up looking fuzzy around the edges#which is! annoying!!! but. well. i must push thru#🎆.txt
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you ever in such a vulnerable spot that you want the comfort of a parent. But you know if you did go to your parents they wouldn’t be on your side because everything you do is wrong to them. So you just curl up and try to comfort yourself in the way no one else is willing to.
#vent#im so anxious and depressed rn I feel physically ill#and to everyone I just seem lazy or like I’m making excuses#because I’m still trying to push thru. because you have to keep pushing until you break down#otherwise it must not be that serious.
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not to be like waah waaaah im so upset about my life while i have a nice and good life in general compared to so many people here but. i still feel like the art piece "here's the life i've always longed for". i keep thinking about my father almost crying talking to me on the phone at the election night. he kept saying he doesnt want me to feel like this country's fate is my only choice, and my life will not be ruined by these terrible people. but it feels like that sometimes. a lot of times actually. and i mean im trying to do things to change it really. but also im not trying hard enough. i get mad at myself for that. then i am mad that i live in a reality where i have to try so fucking just to have a chance of living in a decent reality. and what if i cant do it... i have to try harder i really have to apply myself i dont want to be a disappointment and a regret for my future self. i hope she is in a safe and beautiful place, not here. anywhere but here. please.
#yeah i cried while typing this keep scrolling#the thing is sometimes i think im just exaggerating everything in my head like. what's the worst that can happen right#but the truth is#I'm really really scared for this country's future. i dont know how bad it can be but it is already not good and still going worse#so. i dont think we are reaching when we panic about our future everyday#I know this is because I'm likely severely mentally ill but i cant live with this some days#the normal thing is obviously just. continuing to live#but the fact is that all this shit we've been going thru in the last year (before too. but especially 2023)#have pushed me to the point i was having panic attacks everyday lmao so like. yeah i guess it is fair that i want to gtfo of here#so compared to how ive been im really better#but still i dont apply myself the way i should. and it feels so bad because so many ppl worse off than me are pushing for their survival#everyday while im like waaaah wah i cant focus oh how will i get out of this country oh poor me wah :( lmao#girllll just work on it just do the things u must do. okay this whole post got way out of focus im just#writing my messed up steam of consciousness at this point idk#but. i cant help but say it's hard it's so hard to live everyday for me it's so hard to breathe sometimes#and i know that's a *me* problem. if i was not like this i could do so much#I should be doing so much#to get the life i want for myself. but it's so hard. i hope i wont die unhappy and full of regret#neg#🗒#okay i dont even remember what i wrote here exactly but it's probably the saddest post I've done in a long time#dont know if anyone actually reads it it's so embarrassing when i think abt it 👍 i dont even know where this came from#it's not even a Bad day
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let me ☆ ( prohero!katsuki x fem!prohero!reader ) — you underestimate how gentle katsuki can be, if you needed it | smut
( warnings. ) minors and ageless blogs dni ! fingering, praise, soft gentle sex iktr, reader is going thru tough times & katsuki takes care of you, timeskip!katsuki — 18+
You underestimate just how gentle Katsuki can be.
The instant your fingers click on the lock, Katsuki is already a step behind, his presence a looming force over you like an unshaken shadow. There must be something on your face; Katsuki frowns as he studies it intently, fingers ghosting over your arms, like he’s trying to read between lines that you haven’t even drawn in yet.
"Something happened." He doesn't phrase it as a question, sounding sure of himself. “What?”
"I'm safe," you swear to him, pulling your coat off. "No bruises or anything. See?"
He ignores your extended arms, pinning your gaze with his own. "What," Katsuki demands.
"Katsuki—” You sigh and attempt to push past him. He just rears back and keeps his eyes trained on your face searchingly. "Katsuki, I'm too tired to deal with this."
His brows dip downward further. "I can't help you if you don't tell me."
You falter, struggling to maintain this flimsy display of strength — he knows you too well for that.
He waits. Patient, gentle, like he’s so sure that he can carry this burden with you. You know he can. It’s that fact that makes you think, Of course not. Of course you could never be too tired of him. He never tires of me, too.
“I don't—” you say, looking away, “I don’t know if I can keep doing this anymore. Am I even doing anything right?”
There must be some other reason — Katsuki is evidently fumbling at the threads to tie it all together in his head, but as of the moment, that is all you’re feeling. You don’t know if you can keep doing this. Your limbs want to sag to the ground, knowing it has to prepare again to face the brunt of tomorrow — but you have to care for it, too, or else you’ll wake up dead. Katsuki doesn't deserve that, even if you’re falling apart.
"Everything is just so hard," you continue, the surge of emotions you'd been desperately keeping a tight leash on bursting at the seams; "None of it makes any sense. I don't know if I'm doing anything right."
Katsuki's frown eases. "C'mere."
The next breath you take comes out wet and shaky. The next step you take gravitates to him.
Katsuki pulls you to his chest as you sob. He buries his nose into your hair, rubbing shapes into the small of your back. It almost feels like he’s coaxing it out of you with every touch. You cry violently, lungs spasming, everything pouring out finally — and throughout it all, Katsuki doesn’t split away, even as your tears and snot leave a disgusting patch on his shoulder. If anything, he keeps you enveloped in his warmth, as if he can tell that it helps even without being told.
“N-nothing happened,” you sniffle, trembling, and Katsuki pushes off just enough to see your face; “But it was so overwhelming. I just — I dunno.”
“Baby,” Katsuki starts. You’ve never heard him speak so softly before, low and rough and embodying gentleness that you don't know if you deserve. “Let me take care of you tonight, yeah?”
That sounds good. God, you want him to do that so bad. But looking so weak in front of someone so remarkably strong like Katsuki is embarrassing. You're not some child needing to be told that you're doing good and everything will be all right — needing to be coddled because you had a bad day.
“I want to,” Katsuki says; you feel as though he can read your mind. "Let me."
"…okay." You nod, averting your gaze. "Please take care of me."
And so Katsuki helps you bathe, kisses your knuckles, pulls one of his shirts down that reaches to your mid-thigh, brushes your hair out of your eyes, feeds you dinner he's cooked, and kisses you again. All the while, it's silent. Peaceful. It should unnerve you that Katsuki hasn't spoken a single word since, but you revel in the comfort of hearing his measured breaths instead.
It’s like you can hear him think: You’ll be okay. So let me take care of you. Let me help you be okay.
You feel like you're melting out of your own body, sinking into the comforter's embrace on your shared bed, losing tension in Katsuki's scent and affection.
“Pretty,” Katsuki mumbles, his hand crawling down.
Then you go still when Katsuki watches your expression as he glides a finger in between your legs.
Your cheeks burn. "I — w-what—"
Katsuki hums, thoughtful. "You're already…"
Well, it happens that today is a day of many discoveries. It turns out, Katsuki's hands can be so soft as he works shampoo through your head, and you get horny seeing how attuned your boyfriend is to your needs.
Katsuki can be so gentle with his hands. Of course you’d been thinking of how gentle he can be elsewhere.
"You want me to?" Katsuki asks, slipping a hand under your shirt. His heated fingers caress your waist, his thumb rubbing circles that trickle hotness down elsewhere.
You aren't sure why you feel so shy. You've done worse with each other. "You don't have to. If you just feel like you have to—"
Katsuki lifts an impatient brow. "You think I wouldn't want to?"
You squirm, suddenly aware of the empty ache that is longing for Katsuki. "W-well—"
Katsuki kisses under your right ear before he tugs on your underwear and flings them off to the side. He pulls back to devour your lips in a kiss, swallowing your noise of surprise. Your hands find home in his hair and he thumbs on the source of your heat.
You jolt and choke on a moan as he increases the mind-numbing friction. "Let me take care of you," Katsuki says; "let me, say yes."
"Yes," you cry out in his mouth. You feel floaty with the surge of lust shuddering through your entire body. "Please."
When you break away, you see his pupils wholly overtaking his iris, not even a hint of red. Katsuki licks over his teeth as he stares like he hasn't already eaten dinner. Like he’s doing himself a favor. You wrap tentative fingers around his wrist to guide his hand to your cunt, twitching because it knows it's going to be filled so well with Katsuki here.
Katsuki would make it so good; you know it. You know it so well. He’d know how you want it — need it.
He groans as you feel yourself get wetter. "Baby, shit — you needed this, yeah?"
"Katsuki—"
"I know." Katsuki rubs on the sensitive bud of your clit, kissing your jaw. "I know. Relax, baby, relax for me. Make it feel good. Just like that. Yeah, fuck, like that."
You feel dizzy. Katsuki teases one finger in, watching your face with rapt attention. You're so wet that he slides in easily; he could slip in two more just like that. But Katsuki is focused on making you feel the sensations instead, taking it slow, one by one, leaving you a fluttering, whining putty under him.
Katsuki’s heavy breathing makes you tighten around him involuntarily. He curses, patience rescinded. "One more?"
"Yes, please please — more — ah—"
He curls his fingers, and you tremble and whine, white-knuckled, gripping him, trying to meld yourself into him. Katsuki echoes your sound in a rasp, "Mm. You hear yourself? Fuckin' gorgeous."
It should be embarrassing that you're close already, yet who can blame you with Katsuki overwhelming your senses with every inch of his body — all over and inside you? His fingers are hot, and you're burning up, a coil in your stomach begging to be released.
Your legs shake as your back arches. "Kats — Katsuki — ah, please, please. Please, I'm—"
Katsuki kisses you through all of it. "I know. I know, baby. Don’t gotta beg. I gotcha — give it to me."
You thought you'd already exhausted all your tears, but Katsuki whispering in your ear and coaxing an orgasm out of you so tenderly pulls heat into your eyes. You forget about the weight on your shoulders. Right now, you can only think of how you could fall and Katsuki would catch you. You cry as you break, pulse jumpstarting, and Katsuki takes care of you all over again.
#ᥫ᭡ dekuneho#&katsuki#bnha x reader#mha x reader#bakugou katsuki x reader#bakugou x reader#bakugo katsuki x reader#katsuki bakugo x reader#bnha#bnha smut#bakugou smut#bakugou katsuki smut
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What i've been learning thru my research is that Lawn Culture and laws against "weeds" in America are deeply connected to anxieties about "undesirable" people.
I read this essay called "Controlling the Weed Nuisance in Turn-of-the-century American Cities" by Zachary J. S. Falck and it discusses how the late 1800's and early 1900's created ideal habitats for weeds with urban expansion, railroads, the colonization of more territory, and the like.
Around this time, laws requiring the destruction of "weeds" were passed in many American cities. These weedy plants were viewed as "filth" and literally disease-causing—in the 1880's in St. Louis, a newspaper reported that weeds infected school children with typhoid, diphtheria, and scarlet fever.
Weeds were also seen as "conducive to immorality" by promoting the presence of "tramps and idlers." People thought wild growing plants would "shelter" threatening criminals. Weeds were heavily associated with poverty and immortality. Panic about them spiked strongly after malaria and typhoid outbreaks.
To make things even wilder, one of the main weeds the legal turmoil and public anxiety centered upon was actually the sunflower. Milkweed was also a major "undesirable" weed and a major target of laws mandating the destruction of weeds.
The major explosion in weed-control law being put forth and enforced happened around 1905-1910. And I formed a hypothesis—I had this abrupt remembrance of something I studied in a history class in college. I thought to myself, I bet this coincides with a major wave of immigration to the USA.
Bingo. 1907 was the peak of European immigration. We must keep in mind that these people were not "white" in the exact way that is recognized today. From what I remember from my history classes, Eastern European people were very much feared as criminals and potential communists. Wikipedia elaborates that the Immigration Act of 1924 was meant to restrict Jewish, Slavic, and Italian people from entering the country, and that the major wave of immigration among them began in the 1890s. Almost perfectly coinciding with the "weed nuisance" panic. (The Immigration Act of 1917 also banned intellectually disabled people, gay people, anarchists, and people from Asia, except for Chinese people...who were only excluded because they were already banned since 1880.)
From this evidence, I would guess that our aesthetics and views about "weeds" emerged from the convergence of two things:
First, we were obliterating native ecosystems by colonizing them and violently displacing their caretakers, then running roughshod over them with poorly informed agricultural and horticultural techniques, as well as constructing lots of cities and railroads, creating the ideal circumstances for weeds.
Second, lots of immigrants were entering the country, and xenophobia and racism lent itself to fears of "criminals" "tramps" and other "undesirable" people, leading to a desire to forcefully impose order and push out the "Other." I am not inventing a connection—undesirable people and undesirable weeds were frequently compared in these times.
And this was at the very beginnings of the eugenics movement, wherein supposedly "inferior" and poor or racialized people were described in a manner much the same as "weeds," particularly supposedly "breeding" much faster than other people.
There is another connection that the essay doesn't bring up, but that is very clear to me. Weeds are in fact plants of the poor and of immigrants, because they are often medicinal and food plants for people on the margins, hanging out around human habitation like semi-domesticated cats around granaries in the ancient Near East.
My Appalachian ancestors ate pokeweed, Phytolacca americana. The plant is toxic, but poor people in the South would gather the plant's young leaves and boil them three times to get the poison out, then eat them as "poke salad." Pokeweed is a weed that grows readily on roadsides and in vacant lots.
In some parts of the world, it is grown as an ornamental plant for its huge, tropical-looking leaves and magenta stems. But my mom hates the stuff. "Cut that down," she says, "it makes us look like rednecks."
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give me your heart, make it real
pairing: javier peña x reader
tags/cw: smut, f! receiving oral, p in v, undercover as lovers, big dick javi, no use of y/n, no reader physical description, gentle lover javi
summary: javi needs a 'date' to a party (where escobar and crew will be idk), and asks reader to help him by dressing up in a 'slutty' outfit (not his words)
a/n: okay, yes, the title is from smooth by santana ft. rob thomas (on my javi-coded spotify playlist even tho it came out post-narcos). i've only made it to s2 ep4 and slept thru s1 ep8-10, so i've been committing the crime of not knowing the lore (i am so down bad for javi it's insane)
wc: 3.8k
"I have a lead, and you're coming with me," Javi says, already ushering you out of the room.
"You can't just whisk me away - I have to ask Messina."
"Messina gave me the go-ahead."
"I still need to-" You try to walk away from him but his hand loosely holds your arm, and before you break free, Messina says, approaching from behind, "Go with Agent Peña."
It must be a good lead if she's so quick to send you off with Peña. He looks you over, and says, "You can't wear that. How quickly can you change?"
"Into my tactical gear?"
"No, into a dress."
"Whose quinceañera are we attending?"
"Funny. I have intel about a party happening this evening. You're going to be my date. I need you in a dress - the shorter the better - and makeup, lots of it."
"You want me to look like a hooker?"
"Something like that."
You expect Javi to drop you off at your apartment, but he follows you in – he tries to follow you all the way to your bedroom, but you stop him. Maybe he’s just running on instinct, not used to having a woman invite him into her home without the intention of sex.
"Go sit in the living room," you scoff, pushing him away. "Make yourself at home." You keep your tone sarcastic to avoid letting any nervousness creep into your voice.
You're not supposed to look pretty, per se. He's expecting slutty, and yet, you still worry about looking too slutty in front of Javi. You've made a conscious effort to keep every interaction between the two of you professional, and you are determined to keep it that way. While you cake your face in cosmetics, you remind yourself that you would not go to such lengths for Javi. This is not for Javi, this is for a nobler cause than landing in his good graces. You’re fulfilling your duties as an agent on a mission to stop a narcoterrorist, and that paycheck better arrive at the end of month or you’ll be forced to get on your knees for your landlord who is not quite as handsome as Javi.
Yes, that’s right, Javi is handsome, disgustingly so. You loathe him, not for his sex appeal itself but for his awareness of such, not for the fact that he could leverage it against you, but for the fact that he thinks he can. He can.
Javier Peña sees all women the same way - not quite as objects, but conquests. Even if you're someone, rather than something, you're still someone he could have. But you don't bend to his will, at least you haven't yet, and that's the one thing you hold over him.
Your brain is logical, and holds you to a higher standard. This has nothing to do with desire, but simple facts put into an equation that gives you a clear output. Every time the illogical part of you that lives between your thighs begs for attention, your mind reminds you of your current mantra: Javi is a walking, talking, fucking bad idea.
The red lipstick and minidress are going to get you one step closer to catching Escobar, and if it means you have to be Javi's date for a night, then it's a challenge you're willing to take.
Maybe pretending to like him will be easier than pretending not to like him, which is something you've struggled to do every day for months.
It will not be, you realize, when he whistles at you from the couch when you step out of your bedroom, all dolled up.
"I'm carrying my gun in my purse," you say - an empty threat.
"Good girl."
"Say it one more time, Peña," you warn him, pulling your lethal weapon from a tacky, dated clutch. Your grip on it is weak and the safety is on. He mirrors your gesture, lazily pointing his own gun at you.
But he keeps his mouth shut.
Between the two of you, who's the better shot? You hope you'll never have to find out.
Javi shamelessly flirts his way around the office, but his arm around your waist is purely professional as he guides you from the car, parked a safe distance away, to your destination.
"You don't speak Spanish, you respond to 'chica', and you definitely do not have a gun on you. Got it?"
"What do you want me to call you?"
"As long as it's not my name, whatever you want, chica."
"Asshole."
Playing dumb is more fun than you thought it'd be. The wandering eyes of drug lords make you feel icky, but you don't have to respond when they speak to you. You don’t have to prove your intelligence to every man you encounter, every man who will make you take on any task they can’t handle, don’t have time for, or simply can’t be bothered to do. You don't have to do shit for once.
You keep a drink in your hand as a part of the act. Party girls like you drink, right? Honestly, you’re dead set on keeping your hands full in the hopes that you won’t be given the opportunity to do a line, inevitably refuse such an opportunity, and risk being outed as someone on the other side of this war. Javi doesn't need to tell you to pour your own drink - it's a lesson all girls are taught from a young age. Training as a federal agent may have taught you sharpshooting, but your mother told you how to avoid getting roofied.
You have a tolerance built up thanks to picking alcohol as one of your favorite vices back in college, but you know how to act drunk. While you sway a little, Javi tightens his grip on your waist to keep you grounded. You pretend not to understand when he mentions to a small group of men that you might be down for more than one man tonight, he just needs to get you warmed up first. He sounds a little too comfortable saying those words, and you doubt it's just good acting. Regardless, they seem more than happy to hear about the possibility of getting in bed with you.
"What's everyone talking about?" You slur your words and smile stupidly.
"Don't worry about it, chica," Javi says with a sly look to a man you hope you won't actually have to sleep with.
You swear you see a twinkle of something in Javi's brown eyes as they meet yours.
You realize what that something is when he surprises you by capturing your lips in a searing kiss, daring to slip his tongue in your mouth. His hand sliding downwards says, 'just go with it'. You kiss him back, pulling his hair as he grabs your ass. You know he's putting on a show, but his touch makes you feel something all too real.
You swear you hear a whistle, it's likely directed at the two of you but the hustle and bustle of chatter covers up what the onlookers are saying. Javi hears enough to know that his plan is working.
'Get a room,' they say.
'Do you have a spare?' he asks.
Too drunk for their own good and too horny at the sight in front of them, the leader offers one up.
Your embarrassment is real – you're not hiding a winning smile underneath like Javi is. You're directed to a bedroom, and resisting the urge to scope the room immediately, Javi lays you flat on the bed and climbs on top of you, pinning your arms above your head - and, making you wetter than you'd ever tell him. He's keeping you from pushing him away until the door shuts and he tones things down.
He whispers into your ear when he's sure the man who led you here is far enough away that he can drop the act for a moment, "You're going to do what I say. No questions asked. Are we clear?"
You nod, terrified and knowing he's the only one you can trust in this place. With less shame than one might expect, he shows you what to do, getting you to mimic him. He sucks on his own fingers and you follow blindly, he pulls up the bottom of his shirt and slaps his skin while bouncing on the bed just enough that it creaks, rhythmically, like you're – oh, you understand.
Then, he whispers in your ear, "moan for me," and you do. "Perfect, just like that," he says, and you're no longer praying that you don't get caught by the cartel, but that you don't get caught by Javi. "That's good, keep going," he says, and god, you couldn't stop it if you wanted to.
You've forgotten everything else he's said, so he takes your hand and slides it up your dress, slapping the skin of your thighs and then grabs your hips to bounce them up and down. You whimper at the loss of his touch - all thoughts other than 'Javi' have left your head. He starts searching the room for evidence of anything case-related, and you continue to suck, moan, bounce, slap your skin, pretend to fuck the man in front of you because he wants you to, because he told you to keep going.
You watch Javi's back - as you should. You watch his arms, the way his jeans fit perfectly, the shape of his nose as he turns to his side and you can see his profile, his focused eyes.
You imagine his eyes looking over your body, his nose tickling your skin, those jeans coming off, his arms caging you in while he's on top of you. You hope the bed's not slick with arousal.
Don't touch yourself. But, he's not looking. Maybe you can pass it off as dedication to the cause. Don't. Don't. Don't.
When he finds what he needs, he takes what he can, receipts and encoded notes, and he shoves them down his pants. You watch him readjust. He sees, and gives you a look of 'what?'. He ruffles his hair, unbuttons his top two buttons, making himself look disheveled. Then, he licks thumb and runs in under your eyes, smudging your eyeliner and with the other, your lipstick. As if he's practiced, he wipes the excess red on his lips.
You look stunned, he looks satisfied. Everyone stares when you leave but for all the wrong reasons. They have no idea what went on in that room. Javi has no idea either. It's your own little secret.
When you make it to the safety of Javi’s car, you sigh, relaxing into the passenger seat, and he says, "Thank you. You did really well back there. I could just kiss you right now - for real."
You know what he means. It's another thank you, maybe even I'm proud of you. But he’s still giving you an opportunity. It has to be intentional.
"Then, do it. I dare you."
He could make a joke but he doesn't, he smiles and does as he said. He kisses you, and his lips parting slightly is the offer. When your tongue meets his, he knows, he must know.
"We should celebrate," he says. "Wanna come back to my place?"
You agree, even though you should know by now that going home with Javi is risky business at best.
Javi is enough of a gentleman to offer you a drink before suggesting you move things to the bedroom. All he has is whiskey, and while it's not your favorite, you decide the liquid courage is worth the taste.
"To us," Javi says, raising his glass before tapping it against yours. Sure, you're supposed to look into each other's eyes when you tap your glass against his, but the look you share says something beyond the toast. He might as well have winked at you. The tension is palpable, and you become increasingly aware of Javi's experience in this field - he may hold superiority to you in the DEA due to his extra years working for the agency, but what intimidates you is not that, but his body count, which is surely dozens above yours.
But then again, how much of the sex he has is with prostitutes? Is he even a good fuck? Maybe that's why he pays for sex. No, you've heard rumors being passed around throughout the DEA, and unless Javi pays for reviews too, he's good, great even.
"Are you in there, querida?" His head is cocked to the side in a way that lets you know he's been trying to get your attention for awhile.
"Oh yeah, I was just thinking."
"Anything interesting? I thought I was going to have to shake you."
"No, my mind's just…"
"Elsewhere?"
"Yeah, you could say that."
"Mine too." He places his glass on the table. "You did very well today. Have you ever acted before?"
"No, not really."
"You're a natural, then, because it was pretty convincing."
You think you've gotten away with it until you see the glint in his eye.
"It helps when you're… inspired," you say with a coy grin.
"Inspired? Is that what they're calling it now?"
"I don't wanna say it. It's embarrassing."
"You don't have to, it was pretty obvious how you felt."
It's good that you've had a drink or two because you'd be running out of the room in embarrassment if you hadn't. You're not as practiced as some of the girls he's been with, and it's probably obvious, but you're not a virgin either. You're also not an idiot. This is going in the direction you've always wanted it to - towards his bedroom.
Javi leans in, and whispers into the shell of your ear, "I didn't give you the tour of my apartment, did I?"
His hot breath on your skin sends chills down your spine, but you pretend to be barely-fazed. "Mm-mm, you haven't."
"Do you wanna see my bedroom?"
"Yeah, I'd like that."
He takes your hand and helps you up, and though you’ve felt his hands before, you notice the way one of his can envelop yours. He kisses you, soft and sweet, he kisses you, passionate and feverish, he kisses you with purpose, walking you backwards in the direction of his bedroom. He can tell you're nervous about the possibility of knocking into things so he assures you, "Don't worry. I know my way around. I won't let you get hurt."
"You come here often?"
You get a laugh out of him, light and genuine, but most of all rare. "Not as often as I should."
You find that his grip on you is looser than it was in public. There's nothing to protect you from here. It's just Peña, your colleague. It's just Javi, the man you've seen in the risque dreams you have too frequently to write them off as a misfire in your subconscious.
If someone had asked you with a gun to your head if you thought Javier Peña would be a gentle lover, you'd be dead. And if you are, then you made it to heaven.
He slides your zipper down carefully and lets you slip out of your dress, insisting on abiding by the rule of 'ladies first' when you try to unbutton his shirt. Your fingers shake as you restrain yourself against the urge to rip the fabric, so he replaces your hands with his own. His belt is gone too by the time he sits down on the edge of the bed, hands holding yours while he gazes at you in your bra and panties.
"Do you dress like this under your work clothes every day or was this for your 'costume?'"
"I wanted to do a good job playing my part. I didn't know if I'd need to take off my dress."
"But you were willing to if I'd asked you?"
"You told me to do whatever you said."
"But you could've told me to 'fuck off'. Did you want me to see you like this? Is it possible that you wanted to look pretty for me?"
"You're very good at interrogations, Peña. You would make a good cop."
He keeps his laughter contained, but there's a hint of a smile on his lips when he says, "You're going to call me, 'Javi' when you're in my bed. Are we clear?"
You salute him just to push his buttons, and it works, he pulls you into his lap and holds you there. You love his tight jeans for the way they allow you to feel how hard he is right now.
"So fucking gorgeous," he mutters as his kisses trail down your neck. He undoes your bra with one hand and you brace yourself for impact, dying to feel his mouth on your newly-exposed skin.
You would never have expected his skin to be so soft. His hands are calloused and he has wrinkles between his eyebrows, but his broad shoulders are perfectly smooth. You feel like apologizing preemptively for the marks you might leave.
But Javi flips you onto your back and you see a flash of hunger in his eyes. He's wanted this for a long time too.
"When you were moaning for me earlier, I couldn't stop wondering if that's what you'd sound like if I touched you like this."
'Like this' means one hand slipping into your panties and playing with your clit while the other thumb runs over your nipple. You take a sharp inhale of breath and try not to moan loudly but end up letting out a whimper that must sound awfully pathetic.
"Even prettier," he says, as his voice gets further away and you realize he's getting on his knees.
You must be dead. You must've died at that party because this is too perfect to be true.
He places gentle kisses on the inside of each of your thighs before slipping off your panties.
"Javi." Breathy and urgent, it’s an admission of your arousal.
"Querida?"
Your voice trembles as you tell him the secret you've been keeping. "When I was 'acting', I had to stop myself from saying your name."
"You were such a good girl."
His lips ghost over your clit before he presses a light kiss to your skin. You're so desperate you could cry. You let his name slip out now that you're alone.
"You're still a good girl."
One finger slips inside you like a reward and his tongue circles your clit. You swear he can hear your thoughts - "I'm sorry I pulled a gun on you earlier when you called me that. You make me feel flustered all the time, so much that you piss me off". He groans into your core as if to say, "It's okay. I already knew that".
But then your brain turns to mush and all that's left is, "Javi, Javi, Javi." And his response is to put your legs over his shoulders and slip another finger inside you. He can tell you're struggling against the pleasure, gripping his bedsheets in a desperate attempt to avoid tugging his hair. His unoccupied hand finds one of yours, coaxing you into holding it. The tenderness only heightens the pleasure.
"I know, cariño, just let go for me. I've got you."
The safest you've ever been is with Javi next to you. Safe enough to keep you alive, safe enough for you to cry out his name without fear. You come down from the most intense orgasm of your life, panting with Javi's hands stroking your sides before lifting your legs so he can climb into bed beside you.
Without a thought left in your head, your eager hands reach for the button of his jeans, but he stops you. "Are you sure about this?"
"Of course. I'm in your bed, aren't I?"
"But your legs are shaking, querida. You need a minute to relax."
"I want you."
"I'll still be here in five minutes."
He comes back with water and a condom and you understand why women sleep with him.
He bargains with you - you drink some water and he takes his pants off. He doesn't intend to make a show of it, but you marvel at his body, now fully on display in front of you. The dryness in your mouth reminds you of the cold glass in your hand, which you down, equal parts nervous and aroused at the sight of his cock.
Javi notices the genuine concern in your eyes – surely women have looked at him with the same hesitant desire. In response to the unspoken, he strokes your cheek with a sweetness that makes you blush. "We'll go slow."
He sinks into you slowly, incrementally. His length strokes a particularly sensitive spot inside you that makes your walls tighten around him, and you can feel his hips jerk in response, self-restraint wavering as he holds himself back from fucking you roughly.
Once he bottoms out, he stops and lets you savor the feeling of being full. His lips still red and puffy from their time spent between your thighs, find yours and he kisses you with a fervor that cannot be sustained when you're both breathing so heavily.
"Javi, I need you," you whine.
"You have me."
"I need you to f–" he starts thrusting in and out of you while you speak, forcing you to cut yourself off with a moan.
The way he groans is gorgeous. He sets a steady pace and gets lost in the feeling. The urge to be closer to you takes over and he has you sitting in his lap within seconds. His hands cup your ass and allow him to move you as he pleases.
Your words in his ear are less than coherent when you bury your face in his neck. His teeth graze the skin on your shoulders and in the back of your mind you know you should worry about the marks he might leave, but the desire to be his, to remember that you had something even for a moment overtakes you. So, you throw your head back and give him access to a greater expanse of your skin.
Arousal fills you with a jolt of energy, giving you a boost in stamina, and you leverage yourself on Javi's shoulders and take over the work of sliding his cock between your wet folds, hips erratic and faltering.
You don’t need to tell him how close you are, he can tell. He’s seen you cum before, he’s tasted it.
"Me too," he says. It's more intense than the first one - you keep your eyes open with sheer willpower because you need to know what he looks like when he cums. There's a fair chance you won't see him like this again and you need to keep his beautiful 'o' face in your spank bank.
But what slips from his lips is not a string of curses or a wordless groan, but your name. It sounds even better when you hear it again during round two, and even better when it follows ‘good morning’.
#javier peña#javier peña smut#javier peña x reader#javier peña fanfiction#pedro pascal fanfiction#pedro pascal characters#javier pena smut#javier pena x reader#javier pena x you#javier pena fanfiction#javier pena narcos
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Wild & Free | Part 2 of 2
Pairing: Min Yoongi x female reader
Summary: Everybody says they want to marry Min Yoongi. But what if he only wants to say 'yes' to you.
Alternatively: While on the last leg of their PTD tour, Yoongi discovers there was such a thing as drive-thru weddings in Las Vegas - spontaneous, wild, exciting - something his pretty little brain can't seem to process having lived the last decade of his life planned to perfection by his management team, which includes you. When he goes down a rabbit hole of Youtube videos about The Little White Wedding Chapel (Omo! Michael Jordan got married there!), he starts getting all sorts of ideas - all of it starring him and you.
Genre: Fluff, Angst, Smut, Childhood friends to lovers, Idol!au, Coworkers to lovers (reader is a HYBE employee)
Warnings: Please read part 1 for this to make sense. We start with oral (f. receiving) bec this is Yoongi, sex of course (v. cute and loving, unprotected- u wrap it up tho), self-indulgent shit if ima be honest, more cursing lol, reader is a yapper, couple of idiots but not for long, spit kink, reader is an aspiring brat, overuse of the term ‘baby’, tiny Beauty and the Beast reference if you catch it (tell me if you do!), possible inaccuracies about Las Vegas (read full statement fr part 1)
Word Count: 11k (approx. 45 mins to read)
Posting date: September 27, 2024
Dividers: @/saradika-graphics
Part One | Part Two | Masterlist
“Mm, there,” you mewl mindlessly, tugging his copper hair when his tongue hits. the. spot. “Shit, that’s IT.”
How you went from almost throwing him out of your room to him throwing you on the bed is a blur at this point. The moment your lips touched it was like he took over all your faculties. Brain emptied, pussy surrendered in less than a minute.
The way you are stripped of every inch of your clothing and he still has everything on gives you some false sense of power. But you know he is the one in-charge and dear God you are willing to submit.
Yoongi groans after a particularly harsh pull, and you realize belatedly how his scalp must be burning.
“Sorry,” you release his poor strands, but a quick hand grips your wrist.
“I don’t give a fuck–,” he says sternly, intense eyes looking up at you for a millisecond before diving back in like a man who has not had a proper meal in a year.
As if you’re not sufficiently down bad for him, you discover his dominating side and you are now an absolute wreck.
Eyes squeezed shut, your hands move to grip the sheets to tether you into this world as his hot tongue licks against your folds before swirling on the nub that has your soul ascending to another plane. Pinpricks of pleasure shoot from your core towards the tips of your limbs, every fiber of your being burning, coming alive.
But, he suddenly stops, and you can’t help the tiny whimper that immediately spills from your lips, panicked eyes going down to where he was.
His lips curl into a devilish smirk, before he pushes two fingers inside your entrance and the most obscene moan escapes your throat. Embarrassed, you pull your lips inward to muffle any sound you're bound to make.
He extracts his fingers from your hole and you are horrified at how empty you suddenly feel.
Shit, he looks mad. Were you too loud?
His smeared hand appears by the side of your face, pressing down the mattress to support his weight. The chains on his neck that hovers over your flushed face renders you speechless. You may have seen this in your mind’s eye, but it cannot compare to the real thing.
You see the thin sheen of sweat on his forehead as he lifts a brow and speaks in a voice too calm for a threat, “If you want to cum on my tongue, you better let me hear you.”
“Okay,” you breathe out quickly, desperate, needy.
Looking pleased, he slinks back down, licking the valley of your breasts, kissing your knee, the inner part of your thigh, towards your mound.
He gingerly spreads your folds, purses his lips, then spits—”fuck!”—before slurping the juices from your cunt, creating a lewd melody with your helpless moans.
His lithe fingers start to move in and out of your slick walls in a steady rhythm that has your body tensing up like you’ve never had a proper orgasm.
A warm hand glides up your stomach towards the flesh of your breast, massaging it softly. His calloused thumb swipes over your nipple once, twice, thrice in a dizzying dance before twisting it, synching each roll with a lap of his tongue on your clit.
Goddamn, how did he get so good with that–wait you don’t want to know. You focus on his ministrations, his every move creating tidal waves of pleasure. His tongue moving in figure eights. Two fingers, curling slightly as it slides in and out. Your nipples, pinched and rolled expertly. Sanity, ebbing slowly away…
“Don’t stop,” you beg pathetically. “Shit, Yoongi, please…”
The devil laughs against your pussy, puffs of breath touching your wetness. For a second you thought he might edge you and you are so not a fan of that. But as always, Yoongi knows you, flaws and all. Patience was not your strong suit. And he is never cruel and
“Fuck—I’m gonna cum.”
“Give it to me.”
He keeps playing your body like a guitar, strings plucked and pulled taut, rapidly, repeatedly, coaxing out a melody from you that can rival any track he has ever laid down in Genius Lab.
“Oh… oh… Yoongi… Yoon-“
Body vibrating, hips bucking to meet his every hard thrust, you chant his name over and over in broken cries as white hot pleasure finally crashes through you, leaving you shattered in its wake.
Damn. What was that?
Easily the best orgasm you’ve had in a while and you were about to tell him exactly that. But he emerges from the depths of your core like a fuckin’ devil with the biggest shit-eating grin as he wipes his glistening chin with the back of his hand, and you think—nope, he doesn’t need a big head.
If it were any other man you might not have grasped the pillow above your head to hit him square in the face.
“Don’t look so smug,” you chide, but he just laughs. That adorable shoulders-bobbing soundless chuckle he does.
He lays beside you on the bed, hands behind his head, a cheeky grin plastered across his face as he licks his lips contentedly.
If you only knew the relief that is flooding his own senses at that moment. If you only knew that he took it personally, you chose that younger, more muscly dude to take home for the night. What, like he can’t get you there? Fuck that. He felt so vindicated.
Wordlessly, he guides you towards his body, draping the sheets over your bottom halves. You nestle your cheek against his chest, head tilted up slightly to admire the silver on his neck.
You can almost see the Yoongi you know coming back and decide you wanna bring him down a peg. Just for shits.
“So that’s what that tongue technology does, huh?“ you tease. “Took me to Hong Kong like you—”
“Aishhh! Hajimaaaa!” Your cheeks are suddenly smushed and he smothers your lips with tiny pecks, visibly flustered by his lyrics being repeated to him. It escalates into a flurry of lazy tickles and giggles until it naturally dissolves into lazy cuddles and watery smiles.
You feared this would be awkward, but it actually feels so… natural. Even as you both settle in your own sides, letting thoughts consume you after such a huge leap in your friendship, a comfortable silence takes over that you think he might even be asleep.
But then you feel his soft, slightly clammy hand squeezing your arm, pulling you back into the moment. “You good?” He asks, and you know there are layers to his question that you have yet to unravel. That it’s not just about how you are feeling physically, but everything: the shift in your relationship, this open door to some place new.
“Never better,” you say for now, pushing your body up slightly, so you can kiss his neck, dropping your voice to what you hope is a seductive purr. “I was thinking… Maybe I can return the favor?”
His eyes widen a fraction, but he shakes his head. “S’ cool, I want this to be about you.”
“So corny,” you deflate, moving to rest your head on your own pillow in protest.
“For real. I wanted to make you feel good. Least I can do for ruining your night.”
“But you didn’t--”
Your protest trails off as he lowers his head to kiss you again. Unable to help yourself, you lick against his mouth, your taste on his tongue still palpable, and the coals in your core start to ignite anew.
“Is this how you’ll get me to shut up from now on?” you mumble against his soft lips, swinging your legs over his hip.
“I think it’s working.”
“Sure is.”
“We don’t have to rush,” he reminds you after a beat, pushing a strand of hair behind your ear, not quite meeting your eyes. Because what you didn’t know was what a liar he was. If you had any idea about all the unhinged thoughts brewing in his brain, like how perfect you would look with your mascara smeared and his cock pulsing inside your mouth, or like how he would love to take you to that wedding chapel and marry the shit outta you right now. Literal bonkers.
“But I want to,” you whine pathetically, wandering hands sliding down to the waistband of his boxers. “I want to taste your...”
Your phone rings from a distance, but you see Sejin’s face lighting up the screen.
“Dick.”
“That’s your boss.”
“And that’s what he is right now. It’s almost 3 a.m.”
You begrudgingly walk towards the desk where your phone was, rubbing your arms from the chill of the AC.
You pick up one of your stray sweaters draped over a chair, slipping it on before you swipe to answer the call. “Sejin-ssi?”
Maybe it was late, or maybe your brain dumbed down significantly after that amazing release, but Sejin’s litany was dragging on and you just hope you pick up the key stuff. “director called… need to reshoot early tomorrow… emailed you the details… Yoongi told you what happened right? … make sure he gets the message?”
“Okay.”
“Thanks.”
You check Sejin’s email and texts and give Yoongi the rundown (basically he only has three hours to sleep before the early call time at the same penthouse suite), plugging your phone back in the charger afterwards. You stop by the bath and tug a fresh pair of panties on before returning to the bedroom.
His eyes are like little crescents as you pad over, very sleepy, very cutesy, before it zeroes in on the letters on your jumper. FG, it reads.
“Thief,” he says, pulling you back into bed, letting your head rest atop his arm to make you his little spoon–or so you thought, before he places your head in a mock headlock. “How many of my shirts have you stolen, huh?”
“This year, or?”
He lets go of his grip on your head, squeezing your waist playfully and you giggle.
“I was looking forward to staying here with you,” he mumbles, burying his face against your hair.
“Something about one of the cameras being kicked by somebody and files got corrupted. Know anything about it?”
“Hmm.”
And you suddenly remember the commotion between him and Jin yesterday while Jake was inviting you to go out. Strangely, it’s starting to make sense, but there was something more important to be addressed.
“Yoongi,” you call over your shoulder, and he doesn’t reply so you try to peel his arm from you only to be met by a groan. “We owe Jake an apology. You know that wasn’t cool, right?”
“I know,” he croaks, letting out a deep sigh. “I’ll talk to him, I promise.”
“Thank you, baby,” you mutter sleepily, the yawn leaving your mouth halting mid-way as you clock yourself for the term of endearment that just casually slipped out. Yoongi hums in approval, snuggling even closer, and you decide you might just keep it.
Your first sort-of morning after, you didn’t think you’d wake up alone, but Yoongi had to leave due to the early call time. It was hazy how he left hours ago, but you can recall a peck gingerly placed on your forehead before he extracted the arm that was resting across your stomach and took all the warmth you needed with him. You can vaguely recall his gravelly tone as he places the duvet over your body, none of his words registering in your half-awake state.
You move through your morning on autopilot, going through the motions without much thought. But when you spot Yoongi’s jacket draped over the couch, your mind starts to drift. The details of last night come flooding back—every touch, every word—and before you know it, you’re smiling to yourself as you grab your bag from the same spot.
But then, like clockwork, anxiety creeps in, that old familiar weight settling in your chest. Your steps falter, and as you head for the door, all you can think is: Fuck. What if everything he said, everything he did, was just in the heat of the moment? What if it didn’t mean a damn thing?
The thought tightens around you, and the idea of facing that reality feels like too much to bear. You need to know that you’re on the same page. Stat.
The moment you enter the set, it seems that fate has sent you a sign on what needed to be dealt with first.
You watch as Jake sets up his camera equipment, adjusting lenses and fiddling with the lights. Tapping his shoulder, you clear your throat and offer a shy smile.
“Hi,” he says simply, zipping up one of the camera bags before turning his full attention to you.
“I’m sorry for what happened,” you say, your voice earnest.
His shoulders lift tentatively. “It’s not ideal. But I get it. Jimin told me.”
You raise an eyebrow, a bit taken aback. “Jimin?”
“Yeah,” Jake says, gripping one of the tripods. “He was outside when Yoongi threw me out.”
Oh. Why was he even there? You sigh, adjusting the bag on your shoulder, the mysteries of the situation still weighing on you. “Honestly, I didn’t know he was gonna do that. Things are a bit complicated I guess.”
Jake chuckles, shaking his head as he finishes with the equipment. “Funny, that’s what he said when he apologized earlier.”
“Ah. Glad he talked to you,” you respond, feeling a little relieved that Yoongi did what he promised.
Jake looks at you, his eyes twinkling with a mix of curiosity and sincerity. “Noona, can I tell you what I told him, too?”
You nod, curious. “Okay?”
Jake leans against the equipment cart, his tone light but direct. “Just uncomplicate it.”
He gives you a cheeky grin, adding, “Now this I didn’t tell him, because I like my job and like living. But if it doesn’t work out with him, maybe I could get a chance to take you out on a date for real?”
Your mouth parts disbelievingly and he winks before wheeling the cart away, shaking his head in amusement.
Face still warm from Jake’s shameless flirt, you see Yoongi’s bright orange hair before you even see the rest of him and this sobers you right up. Across the room, he was chatting with Namjoon about something seemingly important. The medium gray suit he was wearing is really doing things to you that you cannot explain. He looks like a proper groom, the fuck?! You look away before anybody sees you drooling over your… best friend? boyfriend? one night stand? Ugh! Future husband? Shit?!
Thankfully, one of the senior PAs proffers an iced coffee to you before your brain overheats.
“Yoongi-ssi says to give this to you,” he says curtly and walks away.
The drink was cold, but the warmth across your cheeks was still tangible as you take your first sip. Your eyes drift back to Yoongi and find his gaze on you so you mouth a thanks, lifting the cup as if to toast him. He simply nods.
The wingman of the year suddenly appears by your side. “Y’all good now?”
“I don't know what you mean, Chim Chim.” You slurp from your drink loudly for show.
Jimin sighs, “He’s not telling me anything.”
“Then I'm not either.”
His nose flares. “Nah. Fuck both of you. Truly. After all I–”
Sejin hollers your name, and you flash Jimin a quick peace sign, cutting him off mid-sentence. He’s left behind, pouting like a baby as you walk away with a grin.
After an hour or so, the shoot almost wraps up. Feeling peckish, you are surmising the food in the mini catering setup in the other room, when you sense someone behind you. Strangely enough, you know who it is just by the way he was dragging his shoes and the timbre of his inhale.
“You smell nice,” Yoongi says in a casual drawl, looking over your shoulder to check the food out.
The tiny hairs on the back of your neck stand up. Maybe you did sneak in an extra spray of perfume before leaving the hotel and made sure to hit the pulse points, because, you know, pheromones and attraction and all that…
Before your mind goes off the deep end, you default to defense mode. “You better not be saying that to everyone… kinda creepy.”
Completely disregarding your attempt to downplay the compliment, he replies, “Hmm. Didn't peg you as the jealous type.”
You pout, trying to look offended but failing miserably.
Shifting gears, he asks, “You busy today?” and places the tiny blue macaron on your plate that you were about to reach for, before pushing a peach one inside his mouth.
“I’ve the rest of the day, but you have to go to Anderson Paak’s house.”
“You’re not coming?” he asks mid-chew, the sweet treat pushed aside creating a dent on the inside of his cheek.
“His team requests for the meeting to be ‘intimate and organic,’ their words not mine, so it's just your interpreter, and your bodyguard.”
“But you’re my…” The beginning of his complaint halts. Cat got his tongue.
He blinks. You blink. It’s just ridiculous at this point, the emotional constipation. He could have easily just said manager, because really that’s what you are for all professional intents and purposes. But you both know you are also at the precipice of something new, teetering on the edge of becoming real. Neither of you has said it yet. Not out loud, anyway.
“We really need to talk.” You decide.
“Tonight,” he agrees with a tight-lipped smile.
“Like really talk.”
“Kay.” he brushes powdered sugar off his hands and onto his slacks. “I’ll be in your room by 8.”
“Please don't try to bust the door down this time, Gaston. Just use the doorbell.”
He crinkles his nose at you and with a small huff he goes back to set, a satisfied grin on your face and hope blooming in your chest that everything will be fine.
***
At 10 past 8 in the evening, you finally hear the doorbell. You drag your hotel slippers-clad feet to the door, stopping by the mirror briefly to check your appearance before pulling the door knob. You were just wearing a shirt and tiny sleep shorts, but you did add a flavored balm to your lips in case.
“Hiiii babyyyy,” Voice slurred, Yoongi’s squinty face comes into view, and your eyes bug out as you find Bangtan’s interpreter Nicole and bodyguard Sunjae holding him up by the elbows.
Reeking of alcohol and maybe a hint of something even more suspicious, he stumbles into your room, kicking off his dunks which lands with a dull thud somewhere you can’t see.
“Explain, please?” you eye his bodyguard who scratches the back of his neck, before he sheepishly recounts how Anderson Paak was all about the vibes…
The fuck?!
Before you can ask more questions, “C’mere baby, I missed youuuu…” Yoongi croons from the couch.
Maybe it was too late, but still, you hold your hands in front of you in an attempt to deny whatever impression they now have of your relationship, “Guys, it’s really not what it looks like, okay?”
“It’s fine,” Nicole assures you awkwardly, holding two thumbs up. “He talked a lot about you in the car, you know? Like a lot. I’m… We’re happy for you guys.” The bodyguard also nods. “And we won’t tell the company.”
Flabbergasted, the sharpest intake of air pierces your lungs. What do they know? And do they know more than you at this point? You just hate Min Yoongi sometimes.
“Alright, I guess I’ll take it from here. Thank you, both,” you say with a tense smile and click the door shut, pressing your forehead on the door before facing the drunkie in your living room who was attempting to turn on the TV with the remote control of the AC.
Great.
This is a version of Yoongi you don’t get to see that frequently. He was ditzy-drunk, a needy, chatty, loopy Yoongi that is actually quite endearing if you remove the fact that he will be hungry in an hour or so (pizza with pickles, usually; sometimes some kind of noodles) and the night typically ends with a good ol’ barf. You’ve dealt with ditzy-drunk Yoongi before and the best solution you’ve found is to just ride the wave.
Slouched on the couch with his legs spread, Yoongi has a lazy but naughty smile on his face as you approach. You wanna be mad so bad, but fuck, he actually looks kinda cute right now.
He tilts his head to the side, jutting his lips out, “Are you mad?”
“No…” you sigh, flopping down next to him.
“Then sit here.” He taps his lap.
“I’m fine here.”
“This is better, I promise. It’s ergonomic.” He presents his lap as a chair with a flourish. You swear, this guy and his weird vocabulary of equally useful and useless knowledge.
You move to settle your body on his thighs, swinging your legs over to straddle him. His mouth stretches into a big grin, satisfied to have your weight on him.
“Why are you so tense?” he places his hands on your shoulders, massaging downward to your elbows.
“We were supposed to talk, but now you’re so out of it,” you sigh.
“I have very high alcohol tolerance, excuse you!”
“Yes, but you’re drunk af right now!”
“False. I’m not at all drunk at all.”
“Wow. So believable,” you deadpan.
“Yah! Why don’t you believe me? Why does no one ever believe me?”
Even ARMY knows he word-vomits when he lies. And when he’s drunk. Deadly combo.
“Ok, prove it. You want to talk, right? So talk.”
He blinks owlishly at you, as you challenge him with your raised brows.
“Thinking is soooo hard,” he complains, before he perks up with an idea. “Ah! Ask me questions and I will answer them.”
A rare opportunity to let Yoongi yap voluntarily. Cool, you’ll take it.
“How many drinks did you have?”
“Yes,” he nods confidently.
You massage your temples with your fingers and sigh. This was going to be a long night.
You end up asking the most random things and Yoongi gives either the most unhinged or deeply unsatisfying responses. At some point during the night, some instant ramen was had (thanks to Jungkook who dropped off some from his stash), after which, Yoongi, as expected, ended up doubled over on the toilet.
As you watched him heave the contents of his stomach, the rancid smell making your own tummy turn, the one thing that you thought was what a mess he was, but you want him to be yours. Your messy, loopy, ditzy, drunkie, Yoongi. Yours.
Eyes pitiful, mouth upturned, with orange locks grouped in sweat, poor Yoongi grasps the seat of the toilet, asking, “Can I borrow a shirt?”
You push the hair away from his forehead, nodding, “Of course, baby.”
After a shower, he emerges from the bathroom with your (his) white tshirt, remnants of ditzy-drunk Yoongi long gone, and in comes the version you love, barefaced and beautiful.
What a masterpiece, Min Yoongi is, and you wonder how it is that some higher being crafted someone with such a delicate face with a mind so captivating and a heart so wonderful. And you haven’t even seen his cock at this point. What if that is a beaut, too?
He walks towards you, head flicked to one side as he rubs a towel on his damp hair.
“Mint, Yoongi? Might settle your tummy,” you gesture to the cup of tea on the coffee table.
“Angel.” He says, padding over to the console with the towel draped on his neck. A slurp and a satisfied mmm later, he settles beside you.
“Are we still playing the game?” You ask.
A pause, but his response surprises you, “I guess we are.”
And so you decide to ask something you’ve been curious about since he got there. Because as much fun as you had conversing with him on petty shit, you are really desperate to know how to move forward with him.
“What did you tell Nicole and Sunjae about me?” you hug your pajama-covered knees.
He lets out a faint chuckle, gaze fixed firmly on the floor as if it holds all the answers. “You should have asked this earlier.”
“I’m asking now,” you face him slightly, trying to read his expression.
By the looks of it, it’s not like he doesn’t know or forgot. The pressure was internal. The hesitation was borne out of years of evading uncomfortable unknowns, which served him well, until it didn’t. You can almost hear the gears turning in his head, thoughts being organized, distilled, rationalized. That’s just how Yoongi is.
And because where he is avoidant, you were non-confrontational. So you open your mouth, about to offer him an out. Maybe you didn’t have to talk about it today? Maybe you should just put a pin on it and maybe talk about it when you’re both ready–like after another decade? Cool cool…
But this time, he shifts. His palm rests face up on his knee, an invitation for you to hold. You place your hand in his, feeling the warmth radiating through his skin, grounding you both.
The television is still on, bathing his features in blue light as you observe him. He picks up the remote and shuts the screen off, the sudden silence working to thicken the tension in the air.
You’re so nervous for some reason that you can feel your palms sweating against his. You already kissed. He already told you he was yours. You just need to sign the dotted line. Sober.
“I told them,” he begins, his voice low and steady, eyes fixed straight ahead on the blank TV. “That you’re everything to me. You’re my best friend. You’re my dream.”
Your heart pounds in your chest, the words reverberating through you like a symphony.
“I think we both know this isn’t just…like we’re not just…you know.” His hand tightens around yours as he bites his lip, struggling to find the right words. “It hasn’t been just friendship for a long time. At least for me.”
“There’s this song I wrote… umm, I was gonna play it for you in the studio when we got home. Fuck it’s so cringe now that I think about it. But, yeah, that was the plan.” He laughs softly, and you can’t help but laugh along, the sound of your shared amusement creating a bridge between you.
Your name falls from his lips, so you glance up and find his warm eyes connecting with yours.
“I love you,” he rasps, voice sincere and raw. “I’ve loved you for so long. Can’t even recall a time that I didn’t.”
Before your mind can catch up with your heart, you crash your lips on his unceremoniously and desperately. You’re back on his lap, hands resting against his chest, feeling the steady, reassuring beat of his heart beneath your fingertips. You kiss him fiercely, pouring all your unspoken feelings into the action. His hand moves into your hair, gently pulling you closer, deepening the kiss.
While your first kiss was passionate, it was laced with so many residual emotions that built up over the course of last night. Frustration, anger, hunger quickly took over both of you the moment your lips finally met, quickly escalating into, well, the best oral of your life, apparently. So no regrets there.
But this kiss—this one—was it. The kind you'd remember fondly when you’re old and gray of what it feels like to be really kissed. Enlightening, like finding the final piece of a puzzle you’d been working on since your youth. Filled with all the love and years of words left unsaid, like a pin code, a password, a key, that only he knew how to unlock.
As you pull away, breathless but content, you look into his eyes and respond clearly, simply, “I love you too, Yoongi.”
And in that moment, as your eyes meet like you were the only two remaining in the world, everything feels right.
“But I can’t believe you let your bodyguard hear that confession first.”
“Aish!”
“I thought it would at least be Jimin.”
“Fuck that. Don’t even talk about another man right now.”
Suddenly that tone is back and your body starts to tense in response. He grips your hips and pulls you against him so you can properly feel the ridge of his cock right against your clothed folds. Yep, that’s a semi.
“You better be nice to me,” his hands move to squeeze your ass expertly, encouraging you to roll forward. Who are you to decline? Not when the pressure from his bulge is caressing your center in the best possible way.
Your body threatens to give in, but the brat in you is still in fighting form, “Or else what?”
“I think you know how nice I can be,” he husks, moving to place teasing kisses on your neck, sucking on the skin to leave a mark. God, that feels good.
“I uh m-might need help remembering.”
He smiles against your neck, his breathy voice tickling you a bit, “You got amnesia, baby?”
You nod meekly, hands roaming towards the back of his neck.
“You better remember my name when I fuck you,” he licks the shell of your ear and you gasp, a gush of liquid soaking your panties.
“Take this off,” he commands, hungry eyes dipping down to your chest.
“So demanding,” you risk the cheeky remark and as expected, you get his unimpressed look. Ok, ok. You’ll be good now.
You lift your shirt by the hem and before you can even pull it over your head, his big, warm hands seize your breasts as they bounce free.
“Fuuuck, baby, I love these. I love these a lot.” He shakes his head in disbelief, bringing your tits together, enjoying how soft they felt in his grasp.
Preening at his dazed reaction, you arch your body forward, placing your chest directly in his sightline. “They’re yours, baby.”
“Uh huh,” he grunts, licking his bottom lip before moving towards one of your nipples. Your eyes threaten to close as the warmth of his mouth envelopes your nub. But you want this moment forever ingrained in your mind–with the way he is mouthing your tits, murmuring his dirty thoughts, lips pushing and teeth pulling. He moves to your other breast, giving it the same treatment, while a hand takes the one his mouth just left, flicking the swollen tip with his index finger to send more jolts of pleasure through you.
“How did you get so good at that?” you mumble, unable to keep your eyes open anymore, your fingers getting lost in his hair.
“How did these get so juicy,” he growls against your spit-covered tit and you feel his teeth clamping down hard.
You moan loudly as arousal pools at your core. “Fuck we should have done this sooner.”
With a small chuckle, he taps your thigh once, and says, “Meet me in the bedroom,” and you are immediately on your feet, leaving him rummaging through his bag for what you assume is a condom. The triumphant “ha!” you hear confirms it.
Okay, so what do you do now? You start with removing your little shorts and chucking it somewhere on the side, leaving you with your basic as hell black cotton panties, but it’s as good as it gets right now. How do you make this sexy, like do you lie down on your tummy, giving him a great view of your cleavage, or stay sat pushing your boobs together like an anime girl. Why you’re acting brand new is beyond you, but your–
“What are you doing?”
You halt your movements, ending up in an awkward mermaid pose that you don’t even know if it looks good. “Umm…”
Cute, you think you hear him say, before he lifts his shirt up and off his body and you get a view of the smooth, pale planes of his torso and his dusty nipples that have your mouth watering. Your eyes continue to drink his unintentional strip tease, watching hungrily as he removes his boxers to let his cock spring free.
“Fuck…” Unfair. Just unfair how gorgeous he is.
By the looks of it, he knows what you want, feline eyes taunting you as he pokes the inside of his cheek before grasping the base of his cock, tugging at it once. “You know what to do, or uh–do I have to shove it in?”
Quickly, you drop to your knees, feeling a little bit of rug burn that you might whine about later, and you slide your hands up towards the back of his inner thigh to anchor yourself.
You were never into power dynamics and all that with your past lovers, but there was something about Yoongi in the bedroom that made you want to be a bratty sub. Something told you that he would enjoy taming you, too.
“If you knew what to do, you would actually shove it in,” you say with misplaced cockiness, not knowing you were going to regret it in about five seconds.
He shakes his head with a disbelieving grin as if to say you’re going to be in big trouble. You gulp as his long fingers grasp the length of your jaw to squeeze your cheeks, forcing your lips to form an O-shape. “Open up.”
You do as he says and as expected, he does shove it in.
He groans as his cock hits the back of your throat. You sputter a bit and you hate how it makes you look like an amateur, but the truth is, you’ve never really taken anyone of his size.
With him still in your mouth, his thumb caresses the side of your cheek, concerned that he might have hurt you, “You okay, baby?”
You nod even as tears threaten to spill from your eyes, not wanting to disappoint him. With a softened expression, he lets his cock fall away from your mouth, but you immediately catch it in your hand with renewed vigor. You pump him for a few strokes before plugging the tip with your mouth as your hand continues the motions.
He hisses loudly as you lick the pre-cum that has pooled in his slit, his salty taste and heady scent invading your senses, springing you to do more. Cheeks hollowed you move to take all of him in your mouth, coating the smooth ridges with your saliva, before his head hits your throat. You’re ready this time, moaning as you keep his entire cock lodged inside.
“Shit,” he exhales breathlessly, a hand combing through his hair as he tips his head back.
Taking it as a good sign, you glide in and out faster, pressing your tongue against a thick vein that runs along the underside of his dick. Your hands move upwards towards the meat of his ass and you squeeze and push him further into you, eliciting a low groan from him.
He clumps a fistful of your hair into a haphazard ponytail as he rocks forward, gauging your reaction as he starts with some experimental shoves. You look up at him, nodding, a silent surrender. The corners of his lips lifts up in a snarl as you place both hands behind your back, relinquishing all control to him.
“Fuckin’ hell,” he grunts as his hips buck into your mouth. Eyes watering, mascara streaks your cheeks as he continues his assault. You keep your head clear, breathing through your nose, wanting, no, needing to make this good for him.
You’re pulled from your thoughts when he lightly tugs your hair, and groans, “Shit, baby— baby, stop.”
He releases your hair and uses his index finger to tip your chin up so he can assess you. Your brows are furrowed, unsure why he stopped.
Slightly out of breath and sporting a lopsided grin, he calls you, “my perfect girl” and your worries subside as he explains, “I had to stop ‘cause it was getting too good. Don’t wanna cum yet.”
You’ve obviously found Yoongi attractive, but he deadass is his hottest right now, dazed and disheveled from being pleasured by you.
He grips his cock and begins to trace your swollen lips with it to smear his slick all over you like a gloss. “So gorgeous…”
You preen at his praise, sticking your tongue out so he can play with your mouth more. He slaps his cock against your tongue a few times, your saliva dribbling down your chin. You taste minute drops of his cum as he works the tip of his dick against your wet muscle in tiny circles.
Your jaw hurts like hell, your face is a mess, but he is looking at you like you are heaven-sent, as if you were carved out by the gods and bestowed to him as a present. With this realization, your heart squeezes with emotions you can’t place. All you know is that you’re willing to do anything and everything for him, his happiness, your own.
You are truly fuckin’ whipped.
“Up baby, let me take care of you,” he scoops you by the elbow, guiding you to the bed. You crawl atop the mattress, wiping your mouth with the back of your hand, and yelp when you feel a playful little slap against your butt.
“Can’t help it,” Yoongi says, moving on top of you, floppy bangs covering his teasing eyes.
He uses the pad of his thumb to rub off some of the mascara from under your eyes, then moves some of your hair away from your face. The softness in his gaze fills you with wonder, and for a few charged moments you both just look at each other, before you break the silence with a tender confession.
“I’ve wanted this for so long,” you tell him as he strokes your cheek.
He smiles. Nods and says, “Me too,” then he kisses you, softly, with gentle caresses of his tongue against the seam of your lips. “You have no idea how long I’ve imagined you like this.”
“Hope it didn’t disappoint.”
“Nah you’re more than perfect.”
Eyes round, lips pouty, warmth blooms across your cheeks at his praise, unable to say a word. You? Perfect?
“Stop being so damn cute when I’m supposed to be fucking you.” He pecks your nose, then down to your lips where he lingers. You push your tongue against his mouth and he is ready to suck on it softly, swallowing your moans. His kisses start getting rougher and faster, as your fingernails lightly claw his smooth back. He’s got you whimpering when he pulls your plush bottom lip with his teeth and releases it with a dull pop.
His breath fans your cheeks as he moves to pepper kisses along your jaw, towards the sensitive spot behind your ear and down your neck. All the while his hands are traveling all over your skin, leaving a trail of fire in its wake.
As you continue to explore each other's mouths, you're starting to become too aware that your pussy is leaking, feeling abandoned, aching for friction. You could do it, dip your hands under the waistband of your panties and take the edge off a bit, but where’s the fun in that?
“Touch me, please Yoongi,” you ask breathlessly.
“I am.” he licks a tender spot on your neck that makes you gasp, while his hand gently caresses the base of your throat, squeezing it experimentally. Another gasp escapes you.
“Lower, please…”
“Where?” he asks playfully. “Here?” He tweaks a nipple and you whine. “Or here?” He lets his fingers move to the mound of your pussy before he hooks your panty to the side and slides his fingers to your leaking entrance.
You wail as the touch you have been craving for finally comes. Yoongi looks ever so pleased with your reaction, biting his lip as his fingers work your clit in slow circles underneath the soaked cotton.
Insane. You’re starting to be driven insane just by the feel of his veiny fingers gathering your arousal and coating your nub with every slow stroke.
Mouth, you desperately need his mouth. You cup the side of his face to pull him towards you and your mouths move languidly, matching the pace of his fingers.
“Wanna be inside you,” he murmurs against your lips.
“Yeah?”
“Uh huh. But I need you to cum first, can you do that for me?”
“Okay, I’m close.”
His index and middle finger picks up its pace stroking against the sides of your clit. The pressure in your body builds, and you can no longer control the way your body jerks at the mounting bliss.
“Let it happen,” he licks your bottom lip. “Cum.”
And finally your body succumbs, thighs clenching hard as you coat his fingers with the outpouring of your pleasure.
Pulling his fingers from your pussy, he makes a show of licking your creamy cum from his fingers and you almost go cross-eyed with how feral the act is making you.
“Gimme a sec,” he drops a kiss on your forehead before moving to roll away from your body, and you assume he was about to get the condom.
An urge comes to mind and you are powerless to stop your mouth from blurting it out.
“You don’t have to,” you tell him shyly, sitting up while he pulls the packet from his discarded shorts. “I’m on the pill, and am clean.” And you know he is, too, because you regularly monitor his wellness checks.
Yoongi stands by the foot of the bed, mouth parting and closing wordlessly like a fish as he tries to decipher your words.
And you know you needn’t say this, but it’s out before you think better of it, “it’s been umm years since my last.”
Yoongi closes his eyes for a few seconds as if weighing his options. “You sure?”
“I want to feel you.” Fingers closing in on his dick, you pump his length, bringing it back to life. “All of you.”
“Fuck,” he groans, nodding. “You drive a hard bargain.”
“How do you want me?”
“Just lay down, I need to see your face when I fuck you.”
You do as he says and your back hits the plush duvet. He pulls your panties down your legs, throwing it on the floor carelessly. He crawls on top of your naked body and you hook your legs around his waist. Your heart pounds in anticipation.
“I’m gonna warn you, I might not last,” he aligns himself by your entrance, and finally sinks his cock inside your swollen pussy. You groan in unison as he bottoms out with ease, lost in the euphoria of each other's bodies.
For a moment, he stays lodged in you just like that, girth nestled against your folds, while your body adjusts to the welcome intrusion. The feeling consumes you whole–warm, wet, wonderful. You take deep, controlled breaths as you fight the urge to rut against him, but your inner walls can’t help but clench.
“Fuck, you feel so good, but I really need to move.”
“Promise we can cockwarm next time?”
“Uh huh.” and with that he starts to thrust into you in short, stuttered strokes, making you gasp for air.
“Fuuuckin hell you’re so tight,” he grunts, chasing the high of his release as dirty words continue to spill from his mouth.
You push your boobs together, his eyes magnetized by the action and watches as you pinch both nipples, making you moan.
“Yoongi…” you say his name wantonly, drunk in your desire for him. “Just use me, baby.”
Growling, he guides your leg above his shoulder for a better angle, and his pace increases tenfold. The sound of skin slapping on skin fills the room, mixed with helpless whines and grunts.
The familiar coil tightens in your belly.
“Touch yourself,” he insists and your hand slides down to where your bodies meet. Your clit is swollen, sticky as you rub it in circular motions timing it with his thrusts. “Are you close?”
“Mmh…” you nod. “So close…”
“Me too,” he pushes inside you rapidly, deeply, like he wants you to feel him for days. His thrusts are getting erratic, and you can see that he is incredibly close with the way his brows are pinched.
Electricity crackles between you, an invisible force leaping from your body to his, building with every shared thrust. His grip on your thighs are firm, and your nails are sure to leave indents on his shoulder. Everywhere your bodies meet, a spark ignites—a surge of energy that only grows stronger.
“I’m cumming,” he warns and it’s a miracle you’re able to respond with “I’m there…” as each movement sends another jolt, until the air itself hums with the raw, electric charge of your passion and you both cum at the same time.
You feel radiant and you swear you’ve never felt more alive.
Meanwhile, Yoongi looks absolutely destroyed as he sets your leg down, and you love it. Impenetrable, aloof, Min Yoongi brought to his demise by your pussy of all things.
He buries his face on the crook of your neck, his breaths tickling your skin. Slowly he eases out of you, and you hiss as you feel his sticky cum seep from your entrance.
“I thought I couldn’t be more in love with you, but shit I was wrong,” he mumbles, face still nestled by the top of your shoulder.
You don’t know what to say. So you keep it simple. “I love you, too, baby.”
After a whirlwind of a night, you and Yoongi quietly begin to clean up. You cuddle for a stretch of time, showering each other with the sweetest words. He hands you a bottle of water from the side table with a small smile, and for a while, you both just soak in the calm.
He finishes washing up first and heads back to the bed, scrolling aimlessly on his phone. Meanwhile, you're still in the ensuite, brushing your teeth, catching a glimpse of him as you finish up. The whole moment feels easy, like the perfect end to a long night.
“We can go out tomorrow if you’re down,” he says, as you spit the mouthwash on the sink. “I’ll take care of everything.”
“Aww. Our first date, huh?”
“We’ve been in plenty. You just didn’t know.”
Really?
You peek your head from the doorway of the bath, “ Yeah, but this will be my first as your girlfriend.”
That got him cheesing, nose wrinkling to hide a shy smile that was so unlike the beast that he was just a few minutes ago.
“What’s taking you so long? I already miss you,” he says pointedly, and you bound back to bed like his little pup and into his awaiting arms.
“I can get used to this,” he says against your forehead, pressing his lips to it.
“I still want to hear the song, by the way,” you mumble, referring to the supposed track that he was going to use to confess. “What is it called?”
“That That.”
“Shut the fuck up,” you slap his chest as he chuckles to himself. Not the crack song with Psy. You roll your eyes, ‘cause he thinks he is so funny, but he just cages you in tighter.
“No title yet, but you get to listen to it when we go home.”
“Mmkay.”
The next morning, you’re back from the breakfast buffet, where you sufficiently replaced all the calories you burned last night, and decide to chill in your room. Meanwhile, Yoongi makes some arrangements for your date.
Lounging on the couch, you are scrolling through IG, when a video call from your mom pops up. You quickly swipe to answer, smiling as her face appears on the screen.
“Hey, dumpling! How’s work?” she greets you with your childhood moniker, grinning like she always does when she sees you.
“Busy, but good,” you reply, while propping your phone against the lamp on the side table. “You know, the usual chaos. We’ll be home in a few days…”
“That’s good.” Then, without missing a beat, she narrows her eyes a little, leaning in toward the camera as if that’s going to make her point clearer. “So… did you use one of your dating apps while you’re there? Are you seeing anyone yet?”
She’s been asking you this for months, though always with that loving impatience that makes it hard to get annoyed.
Thankfully, today is the day that you have a different answer. “Actually… yeah. I have a boyfriend,” you admit, cheeks heating up.
Your mom’s face lights up immediately, her teasing forgotten. “Omo! Finally! That’s wonderful news. I was starting to think I’d have to phone Min Yang-hee and arrange…”
And of course, Min Yang-hee’s very own son, completely oblivious to the call, walks into view. And of course, he’s shirtless. Because why wouldn’t he be showing off those sweet little nips right now? And of course he is wearing low-hanging gray sweatpants. Because why wouldn’t his dickprint taunt you at the most inconvenient time?
“Baby, can I borrow your—” his voice cuts off as he realizes what’s happening. He freezes mid-step, eyes flicking between you and the phone.
“Yoongi-yah?!” your mom exclaims, her eyes practically sparkling.
Yoongi blinks, then awkwardly grins, as he grabs a throw pillow from the couch to shield his chest. “Oh… good morning, eomonim. Didn’t know you were, uh, here.”
Your mom’s grin turns downright mischievous. “Well, well, well. Look who finally makes a move! I was telling dumpling that I was about to call your…”
”Eomma!” You bury your face in your hands, feeling your cheeks burn with the insinuation of an arranged marriage.
“What?” she says, all fake innocence. “I’m just saying. Took you long enough, Yoongi. You’ve been trailing after her since you two were kids.”
Yoongi scratches the back of his neck, clearly embarrassed, but laughing along. “Eomonim, good things take time, right?”
“Oh, I’m sure. And look at you—future grandkids are gonna have such a handsome father.”
No, your own mother did not just check your boyfriend out. “Eomma, stop…”
“But don't think I haven't been keeping up with the news. Young man, you seem to have been getting wedding proposals left and right, you better not break my dumpling’s heart.”
“Please eomma.” You say even though you were getting a little teary-eyed from her being over protective of you.
“She’s the only woman I've been interested in, eomonim. As you said, since we were kids.”
“That’s what I like to hear. Quick, let’s add your eomma here! Such good news needs to be shared.”
Yoongi, now a deep shade of pink, chuckles nervously.
“Maybe later. We have a schedule to go to…” you interject.
“Is that what you kids call having se—“
“Love you, eomma!” You eye her pointedly, sufficiently mortified by the whole conversation.
Still grinning, your mom waves you off. “Love you, too, dumpling.”
Yoongi ended up renting a convertible and driving you all over town.
For lunch, you visit a charming café in the Arts District. The place is known for its artisan sandwiches and freshly pressed juices. You share a sandwich, a soup, and a salad, enjoying each other’s company and a few laughs over a meal that’s as delightful as it is delicious.
Then you move to a coffee shop you had wanted to try and it turned out to be a gem. The café was warm, cozy, with the faint hum of chatter and the clink of mugs surrounding you both. You sat across from him, your hands intertwined on the table, his thumb mindlessly stroking the back of your hand as you talked. The conversation was light, random, teasing—the kind of banter that always made you feel like the two of you were in your own little world.
“So, if you could magically transport us anywhere right now, where would we go? And don’t say ‘bed’—I swear you can’t always be sleeping.”
“Can I say bed, but not ‘cause I want to sleep?” He smirks, leaning back in his chair, still holding your hand, his middle finger rubbing your knuckles teasingly.
You scold him, “You’re so shameless!” and try to pull your hand away but he keeps his grip tight. He takes a few moments to think about his response.
“Maybe somewhere snowing like Sapporo. It’s going to be too cold for you to keep checking your phone every five minutes when we’re out.”
You look up from your phone screen guiltily, abandoning the email notification that flashed. “I have to ’cause I work for your famous ass,” you huff.
“About that…” Yoongi starts, and you know he meant your resignation.
You sigh, realizing you haven’t really discussed this with him. “Sorry I didn’t tell you sooner.”
“Baby,” he leans forward, eyes kind. “You don’t have to apologize, okay? You have your reasons and I respect it. I’ll always support you.”
“I think this would be good for me, you know? Try something new.” You add, “There’s this corner spot close to my flat that I’ve been looking to lease.”
“For your cafe?” his face lights up, remembering your dream from way back.
“For my cafe,” you nod, heart expanding with the excitement you see in his eyes.
“Do it.” he says. “And if you need a handsome barista to help out once in a while you know I live just two streets down.”
You laugh, shaking your head, enjoying how easily he can make you smile.
“But I can’t afford you.”
“I’ll take payments in kisses and blo–”
“Min Yoongi!”
“I’m just playing, baby.”
His hand is still on yours, his fingers tracing gentle circles along your knuckles. It was so natural, so comfortable, that you barely notice when his touch becomes a little more deliberate, more precise.
It is not until you prepare to leave that you notice something different. You stand, bag tucked on the crook of your arm, and as you reach for your jacket, you see it—a tiny paper ring, made from a straw wrapper, folded with care and snug around your finger.
Suddenly, butterflies swarm in your stomach.
You look at him, eyebrows raised, holding up your hand as if it were evidence in a crime scene. “Yoongi?” you ask with a playful smile.
He blinks, trying to look innocent. “What? Wasn’t me.”
“Uh-huh,” you step closer, your eyes narrowing. “So, it just magically appeared on my finger?”
He shrugs, leaning casually against the back of his chair. “Must’ve been the wind. Or, you know, maybe it’s a sign. The universe is telling you something.”
You can’t help but laugh, feeling your cheeks warm as you play along. “And what exactly is the universe trying to tell me?”
He gave you that signature smirk of his, the one that always made your (and the entire ARMY’s) heart skip a beat. “That you’ve been claimed. Obviously.”
You roll your eyes, but can’t stop smiling. “Ah, really? Claimed by some mysterious paper-ring-tying ghost?”
He shrugs again, standing up and taking your hand as you both walk toward the door. “Who knows? But if I were you, I’d hold on to that. Could be worth something one day.”
You glanced down at your finger again, your chest warm with affection. “Yeah,” you agree softly, squeezing his hand. “I think I will.”
You continue your date along the backstreets of the Strip, away from the towering hotels and flashy fountains. As you stroll in silence, enjoying the sights, your fingers mindlessly play with the little ring on your finger, and his voice echoes in your head: “You’ve been claimed.”
And suddenly, you realize it’s true. You’ve claimed each other long before today’s paper ring and long before last night’s confession.
Every day since you’ve become close friends, you’ve claimed each other in the most ordinary ways. With every mundane moment and seemingly random act of kindness, you’ve expressed your love without needing grand declarations.
He knows exactly how you like your coffee and the perfect time to bring it to you. He carries your bag even when you insist you can manage on your own and even with his own busted shoulder. He always saves a seat for you—of course, right next to him. You have a suitcase here and a closet full of his shirts back home. He wears your black hair tie on his wrist and has a whole drawer full of them at his place. You know his five shades of drunk, and you know just the right kind of tea to cure his hangover.
He has truly been yours, and you, his. You both have just been too oblivious to see it. As the realization hits you like a freight train, your gaze lands on a sign that inspires you to show him just how committed you are. Sure, it’s bold and completely out of character for you, but you don’t want to think it through. It’s stupid. But who cares? You’re in love.
“You wanna get matching tattoos?”
Yoongi’s POV
Min Yoongi likes being in Las Vegas. And maybe this is why.
This is where he finally gets lucky. And not in the crass sort of way.
Here, he has felt a surge of courage he’s never had before, pushing him to act on feelings he’s kept hidden for way too long. And while confessing to you still felt like a gamble, he was more ready and willing to roll the dice and see where it lands.
People say what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. But for Min Yoongi, this time is different. He’s determined to make it last—just like the identical lotus tattoo that now sits on his wrist and on yours. It isn’t just a reminder of this wild adventure; it symbolizes the beginning of something real and lasting between you two.
After getting inked, he decides to drive away from the city, heading towards a scenic cliffside spot he found on Google that morning. He thought it would be the perfect place to unwind and catch the sunset, while enjoying the spam musubi and Slurpees you got from the gas station nearby. Truth be told, he thought maybe he could sneak in a makeout session with you, too, something he knew couples would sometimes do in places like this. (At least that’s what he’s seen in American movies!) Being an idol often kept him from enjoying “normal” things, and since he couldn’t exactly do this with you near the Han without the fear of being on Dispatch that same night, he figured it would be a fun escape to pretend he was just an ordinary guy taking his girl out on a date in this foreign city.
He sits on the hood of the convertible, the metropolis stretching out below, a sea of lights slowly flickering on as the sun dips toward the horizon. You’re nestled against him, your head resting on his chest, his arm draped comfortably over your shoulders.
Your phone is connected to the car speakers and it’s currently playing a ballad. He hears you hum softly but his mind drifts elsewhere, somewhere between the quiet beauty of the moment and the thoughts that have been building for weeks—maybe even longer.
It started with that whole Yoongi Marry Me thing. Who knew that cheeky little “bring the documents” quip he said in one live will set off a whole ass thing with ARMY. Or with the whole kpop industry, modesty aside.
Almost everyday the phrase is repeated to him, especially by the members (fuckin Taehyung!). Fans have been showing up to concerts in veils. Chats are filled to the brim with that proposal whenever any of the members goes live. Even when he is not there.
It’s all been fun and games until you. Until you said it. And you had to keep saying it, then suddenly it didn’t feel like a joke anymore. He started thinking he wouldn’t mind it. Like at all.
You’ve planted a seed in his brain that just kept blooming and blooming. Seeing all the wedding chapels in Las Vegas only served as potent fertilizer. And now the concept has fully blossomed in his heart and taken root in his mind.
He feels the warmth of you leaning into him, your breathing soft and steady, your humming so sweet, and everything about this moment feels… right. More right than any plan he’s ever made, more perfect than anything he could have mapped out for himself. It hits him then, with a kind of clarity that almost startles him.
He’s done with waiting. Done with the endless planning, the careful timelines, the stream of approvals needed for every thing he wanted to do. This, right here, is his everything. And for the first time, the idea of doing something spontaneous doesn’t terrify him. It excites him. A whole life with you excites him.
And fuck, if it’s good enough for Michael Jordan…
He glances at you, the way your eyes reflect the soft, fading light, and something roars in his chest—an overwhelming certainty that he can’t hold back anymore. He isn’t one for grand, impulsive gestures, but this doesn’t feel impulsive at all. It feels inevitable.
“What if we just… did it?” he asks, tone light, but heavy with intention.
You tilt your head, looking up at him with that curious smile he loves. “Did what?”
His fingers tighten ever so slightly on your shoulder as he turns to face you fully, feeling a rush of nervous excitement. “Got married. Right now. No more waiting, no more planning.”
He sees the surprise flash in your eyes, the slight parting of your lips as you process what he’s just said. He waits, letting the words sink in, watching as the curiosity in your eyes slowly fades into something else.
“You’re not joking?” you whisper, your voice tinged with disbelief.
He shakes his head, the last of the setting sun casting a golden glow over the both of you. "No. I’ve… we have planned everything in my life, but this... with you, I don’t want to plan anymore. Because what good are plans if you’re not gonna be in them, with me.”
He continues, voice more certain, committed. “I wanna do it. Now. Tonight. Let’s drive to the chapel, and if you’re ready... Let's get married.”
He watches your reaction closely, his heart pounding, but not out of fear. He’s not afraid anymore. He no longer needs to hide behind liquid courage to give you little hints of what he has been feeling deep inside. He knows what he wants—what has been right in front of him this whole time. And then, just to lighten the weight of the moment, he smiles, a small chuckle escaping him.
“Besides, I’m pretty sure we’ve got your eomma’s blessing already. She’d probably drive us there herself if she knew what I was thinking.”
You laugh, that soft sound that always makes his chest tighten in adoration. The way you smile at him now—there’s no hesitation in it, only the same certainty that he feels. The city lights flicker to life behind you, but all he can see is you and your bright, sparkly eyes. And how he wishes that you would grant him the eternity of looking into them.
“Let’s do it,” you nod at him, your voice steady and sure. “Right now.”
His heart soars. He bites his lip, squeezing your shoulder, and with one last glance at the fading sun, he slides off the hood of the car, offering you his hand.
As you hop down, he drops to one knee. Taking your hand, fingers delicately closing in on the paper ring that he placed on your finger earlier in the day.
“Y/n, marry me?”
“You sure you don't want me saying ‘Yoongi, marry me‘ instead. Has a better ring to it…”
“Hajimaaa! Why you gotta ruin the moment?!”
“Sorry, ok ok, do it again.” You try to placate him with a quick press of your lips to his forehead.
He shakes his head at you. Eyes narrowed, but fond. Fond in the way your eyes sparkle with glee, even as you bite your bottom lip. Fond in the way you look at him like he hung the moon and the stars in the sky and you know what, he would hang the entire galaxy for you if you asked him to.
So, no more waiting. No more planning.
He finally asks: “Baby, will you marry me?”
And you finally answer: “Yes!”
Epilogue
Jimin’s POV
Why is Tinder so, so dry? Jimin curses and contemplates tossing his phone in the trash.
But then his phone pings and when he looks at the notification, he sees that he is added in a Kakao group chat.
Okay. He checks the members curiously. It’s with you and Yoongi hyung.
What are you fuckers up to this time?
Tbh, he was still kinda annoyed that neither of you had told him anything after what went down at the club. He literally babysat your dejected boytoy and had to crisis PR the shit out of the situation because Yoongi had to get slightly Agust D.
And seriously, how can you even stay mum to him of all people. He has listened to your every woe and whine for months about how Yoongi can’t even see you as more than a friend. Newsflash, he is obsessed with you! He has witnessed Yoongi’s pining for years and talked to him countless times to confess. ‘Cause, newsflash: you’re obsessed with him, too!
Did his attempts at playing matchmaker work? Who knows? But damn did he try. Playing cupid for the two most emotionally constipated people he knows hasn’t been easy. So after everything he has done in the background for you two idiots, how dare you keep him in the da–
His thoughts are interrupted by three pings as three messages come in rapid succession.
First, a location pin:
📍The Little White Wedding Chapel, 1301 S Las Vegas Blvd, Las Vegas, NV
Then, a text from Yoongi that made him smile so wide.
Yoongi: Get your ass here right now we need a witness.
And lastly, yours that made his grin even wider.
You: Yoongi’s marrying me!!!
-THE END-
A/N: Thank you so, so much you beautiful human for reading this story. I am forever grateful that you decided to explore this silly little world with me.
I would love to hear from you! Please leave a comment or consider reblogging if you liked it. Til next!
Here's my new MYG x Reader story if you want more. :)
#myg x reader#yoongi x reader#min yoongi x y/n#yoongi x y/n#yoongi x you#min yoongi x you#min yoongi x reader#yoongi fic#yoongi smut#yoongi angst#yoongi fluff#bts fic#bts fanfic#bts smut#yoongi x oc#bts idol au#yoongi marry me fic#bts x reader#suga x reader#suga x y/n#yoongi fanfic#gingeryoongi#suga x you
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something new - j.ww
pairing: jeon wonwoo x gn!reader
genre: university!au, e2l, academic rivals to lovers, featuring svt as your friend group, angst, fluff, suggestive - MDNI!!
summary: you and wonwoo have been rivals since the first day you met, everything he did irritated you to no end, and yet, you couldn't escape him and, at a certain point, maybe you didn't want to.
warnings: swearing, alcohol, no one knows how to communicate lol, kissing, suggestive
wc: 5.7k
a/n: wonwoo academic rival bc i love him being all nerdy n shit. i really enjoyed writing this so let me know what you think + if you have any requests for some new fics!! ฅ ���
You stare down at your paper, illegible and scattered with doodles and a sharp exhale falls from your lips. Tapping your pen against the table, you wonder how the hell you’re going to pass this surprise exam - a surprise for you at least, apparently telling you must have slipped everyone else’s mind. Someone taps your shoulder lightly, bringing you out of your spiral. You turn to meet the eyes of the stranger sat beside you, his jet black hair is pushed roughly out of his face, allowing you to see his soft dark eyes peer down at you.
You raise a questioning eyebrow at him, clueless as to why he would be trying to get your attention in the middle of an exam. He mouths the word ‘pen’ in response, pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose, his eyes looking at you with pure desperation. Looking at his desk, you notice the pen next to his hand is broken. You turn away briefly and watch as he lets out a breath of relief and adorns a grateful smile once you appear with a spare pen for him to use.
It seems like the bell rings almost immediately once you return your focus to your exam paper - shit. Now you’re definitely not passing. The bell sounds vaguely familiar as it continues to ricochet through you, you rack your brain trying to remember where you’ve heard the sound before… oh, it’s your alarm clock. Oh! It’s your alarm clock!
﹒˚ ₊ ︵﹒⊹ ๑ ︵︵ ๑ ⊹﹒︵
Your eyes snap open as you sit up in bed to turn off the irritating tune that your clock had been emitting for god knows how long. It was the first day of the semester, of course you had woken up twenty minutes behind schedule after a cliche ‘first-day-of-school’ dream, what else could you expect?
Arriving at your first class of the day, you find your friend Seungkwan sat strategically in the corner of the semester hall - just far away enough to avoid the risk of being called upon by the professor. You take a seat next to Seungkwan and listen as he begins to rant about his commute. You and Seungkwan have been friends since Freshman year after getting paired up for a group project. Originally, you were fearful that you wouldn’t get along, on the surface you were like chalk and cheese, but you find now that Seungkwan balances you out just right. His bold extrovertism has pushed you to be a little less timid, to actually live and, you like to think that you’ve mellowed him about a bit too. You wouldn’t mind listening to Seungkwan talk and joke around all day, that’s when he’s happiest so, naturally, you are too.
Your conversation with Seungkwan comes to stop as both of your attention gets drawn to a loud racket growing a few rows behind you. You follow the noise to find loveable class clowns Soonyoung, Mingyu, and Seokmin.
“Ah, it's just Soonyoung, so anyways…” Seungkwan turns back to his laptop and continues expressing his somewhat irrational love of drive-thrus . You, however, are still watching your classmates, unable to tear your eyes away from one of them, his dark slightly nerdy features captivating you.
“Kwan,” you murmur, “Who’s the guy next to Seokmin?”
Seungkwan hums, satisfied, “I was waiting for you to say something, always so nosy.”
You huff gently, knowing well enough that there’s no point in arguing with him, “So?””
“Jeon Wonwoo. Just transferred for his last year I guess.”
“Huh weird, I could've sworn I’ve seen him before.”
Your friend scoffs jokingly, “In your dreams bro.”
You sigh again, resting your head on the desk sulkily. ‘In your dreams’, Seungkwan’s words echo. Wait… Is he… your head whips around to glance at the mysterious man again. No fucking way… Jeon Wonwoo is literally the guy from your dreams.
﹒˚ ₊ ︵﹒⊹ ๑ ︵︵ ๑ ⊹﹒︵
If you had known back then how much you would grow to dislike Wonwoo, you never would have commented on his good looks that first day but, you guess you can’t really blame yourself for not knowing how much of a dick he was. Since you had met, you had tried, maybe too hard, to figure out what you had done to make him treat you the way that he did. Over the weeks you have watched him form bonds with everyone in your class - especially your friends, and you saw how his smile fell and laughter stopped as soon as you made your presence known. It was if you had physically attacked him, the way that his eyes immediately dropped to the floor once you came into view. The thing that annoyed you the most about Jeon Wonwoo though, more than the unexplained icing out, was his brain.
You don’t like to brag but you pride yourself on your intelligence, especially in academia. You had worked hard to reach the place you were in now, throwing away your teenage years in favor of ensuring a happy and successful future for yourself. Because of this, you work hard to make sure you’re at the top of the list whenever your exam results are released - improving upon yourself and being the best of the best, that’s what you strive for. So of course, it came as an infuriating shock when Wonwoo knocked you out of the top spot, that smug look on his face and the glimmer in his eyes as he walked past you that day was something you couldn’t get out of your head. No matter how hard you tried, day and night, the only thing on your mind was Wonwoo and how to beat him.
﹒˚ ₊ ︵﹒⊹ ๑ ︵︵ ๑ ⊹﹒︵
“Ok, what can you tell me about Wonwoo?” you are sitting in your campus cafe, your best friend Seungkwan sits across from you as you mindlessly stir your coffee.
“Why do you always assume I have information on everyone?”
“Because you always do, my favorite gossip.” you reply, buttering him up in hope he’ll give you something, anything.
“What’s your business with him anyways? Oh…” he gasps “you have a little campus crush don’t you? That’s why you’re so off around him.”
“Don’t go spreading false information, Boo Seungkwan, he’s the one who gets cold and quiet when I’m around. Besides, no sleeping with the enemy.”
“He’s the enemy now? Hot.”
You scoff gently at his comment, rolling your eyes “Just tell me what you know”, you say laughing.
﹒˚ ₊ ︵﹒⊹ ๑ ︵︵ ๑ ⊹﹒︵
As time goes on, nothing much changes between you and Wonwoo. He becomes a fixture within your friendship group with the boys taking him under their wing and as he begins to pop up in more areas of your life, you learn more about him. You learn about his love for video games and cats, you learn he’s a great listener but can speak for the country when he’s passionate about something. You learn he’s funny and even smarter than you thought. It’s annoying that you could imagine actually being friends with him if he was just nice, you admit you might be able to understand the crowd of girls that follow him around aimlessly if he wasn’t such an asshole. Because, despite him joining your friendship group and you - unwillingly - spending more time around him, he still acted so coldly towards you, no matter how nice you were to him, he never faltered.
“Split into groups of six, no more, no less and create a presentation applying your chosen theorem to the 21st century.” your professor orders. Immediately the students around you begin to migrate around the room, collecting friends for the group project. You turn to your left to find that Seungkwan is already clambering over the seats behind you to reach Seokmin, Mingyu, Soonyoung and Wonwoo - all four of them cheering on his show of athleticism.
“Quickly guys! Come on!” the professor calls out from the front of the class. You look around to realise that you’ve waited a bit too long to choose a group for yourself. That’s when you hear your name being called and turn to find Mingyu reaching his hand out to you with that cheesy grin you just couldn’t say no to.
“We need the class nerd on our team, c’mon!” Soonyoung calls out to you from above.
“We already have Wonwoo though?” Seungkwan remarks with a mischievous smirk. You quickly shoot him a stern, irritated look as his smile is broken by Seokmin elbowing him in the ribs for a reason you can’t quite figure out.
A few days later, you and your friends (and Wonwoo) decide to meet at the library to brainstorm for your project. You arrive first with Seokmin and Mingyu and find a table just big enough for the six of you. Soonyoung trails along not long after and the four of you play some quiet games whilst waiting for Seungkwan and Wonwoo to arrive. You note that one of the two empty seats is positioned directly across for you whilst the other is out of view. The solution is clear, Seungkwan will sit across from you, at least then you’ll be able to focus on the assignment.
Once the pair arrive, you attempt to signal to Kwan, strong eye contact asking him to take the chair opposite you.
“Won, which seat do you want?” He asks the other boy, and you can’t hold back the sigh that escapes as your plan crumbles before you
“I’ll take this one, the lighting’s better.” Wonwoo replies, making brief eye contact with you before pulling out the chair with a shy smirk on his face.
…what was that about? And when did he get so cocky?
Soonyoung clears his throat, breaking the awkward silence that suddenly fell over the group and you thank God that he’s here to take the attention off of your exchange with Wonwoo and prompt you to actually start working on the project.
﹒˚ ₊ ︵﹒⊹ ๑ ︵︵ ๑ ⊹﹒︵
Soon enough, you find yourself in a quiet bar across town on a Thursday night. Following your friends’ advice you decide to accept your coworker’s invitation to grab drinks. You tell yourself why not? He’s nice enough, attractive and funny, sometimes anyways. Plus you haven’t got much else going on in the love department - no harm, no foul.
After half an hour or so of pleasant small talk, you leave the booth and head towards the bar to order another drink. As you trudge across the sticky floor you are stopped in your tracks as a man steps in front of you, blocking you from reaching your destination.
“Excuse me,” you begin, attempting to manoeuvre around him.
“You shouldn’t be with him.” the man says.
“Excuse me?” you repeat, this time in disbelief.
“You heard me.” he says, quieter this time. You lift your head to get a proper look at the stranger’s face.
“Of course you’re here.” you scoff. You push past him, shaking your head as you reach the bar. He follows, not giving up.
“You don’t suit each other.”
You laugh, God, he’s so infuriating, who does he think he is?
“Oh please, Wonwoo, like you know the slightest thing about me.”
“Actually I-”
Just then your ‘date’ appears, “Is everything ok?” He asks with a slightly concerned look.
“Yeah! Just a… classmate.” A false happiness lines your voice.
“Come on, let's head back to the table.” you say, turning your back on Wonwoo who watches on with a solemn expression.
﹒˚ ₊ ︵﹒⊹ ๑ ︵︵ ๑ ⊹﹒︵
Not long after that, you find yourself at the library with your friends almost every day, grinding to get your project completed. You and Wonwoo haven’t spoken about the night at the bar, not that he speaks to you usually anyways. Instead though, you begin to catch him looking at you more and more often, his gaze burning into you, making you heat up and, most importantly distracting you from your work.
“What’s going on with you and Wonwoo then?” Seungkwan asks one day whilst you do a snack run for the rest of the group.
“What?” you reply, stopping where you are, astonished.
“Just saying, he can’t keep his eyes off of you.”
“He’s trying to sabotage me or something.”
“...Why would he do that? Y’know we’re graded as a group right?” He says, baffled.
“Whatever.” you reply, turning into the next aisle, fed up of even thinking about Wonwoo, never mind talking about the man.
Returning to your friends, they circle you like vultures, picking out they’re snacks. It’s a chaotic free for all and you’re left with a candy bar and some chips. Wonwoo stands patiently whilst the others rob you blind so, once the others return to their seats you approach him quietly, avoiding eye contact and place the chips in front of him. He mutters a small “thank you” and smiles gratefully, watching again as you return to your work. Now he’s just being weird, you think to yourself. You can’t help but be curious about what he’s plotting.
At the end of the study session, the boys decide to head to the bar to reward themselves.
“Y/N, you coming?” Mingyu asks.
“I’m good, thanks though!” you reply with a soft smile, finding a quiet night watching Netflix to be a bit more appealing today.
Your friends leave before you, saying goodbye whilst you pack up your stuff. As you shove your laptop into your bag, you can feel someone’s eyes on you and your face begins to heat up at your suspicion.
“Wonwoo! Hurry up!” you hear Soonyoung whine.
“Right, sorry.”
You look up just quick enough to catch him turning away from you and running to meet with the rest of the group.
Huh, weird.
﹒˚ ₊ ︵﹒⊹ ๑ ︵︵ ๑ ⊹﹒︵
That weekend, your phone buzzes with a string of texts from Mingyu.
Mingyu: Wanna come over and play video games?
Mingyu: (Say yes)
Mingyu: Pleaseee, I’m so bored :)
You’ve worked fucking hard recently and couldn’t think of a better way to end the week than by playing nostalgic video games with one of your closest friends
Y/N: Don't even WORRY, I’m omw
You respond quickly, pulling a bleach-stained hoodie on and heading for the door.
You’re sat on the floor next to Mingyu in front of his TV. The room is dead silent, spare some trash talk from the both of you as you channel all of your focus on Mario Kart. As a result, neither of you notice Wonwoo coming in to watch your fierce competition.
You swear you see your life flash before your eyes when he, watching the screen intently, mumbles “Be careful. Blue shell coming your way.”
His sudden words do nothing but scare the living shit out of you and make you crash into a wall.
“Oh my god,” you exclaim, heart beating rapidly after his jumpscare, “What the fuck are you doing here?”
He looks at you blankly, taken aback by your overreaction, “Oh…uh… I live here.”
You turn to Mingyu who confirms with his lips pressed together in an awkward smile.
“Oh. Sorry. You just scared me a bit, my bad.”
He chuckles quietly in response before walking over to the kitchen and leaving the two of you to finish your race (which you still win, despite Wonwoo’s meddling.) A handful of races later, Mingyu’s phone buzzes, ushering him to go and collect the takeout you had ordered. Standing up, he grabs his jacket and keys but doesn’t dare leave before messing with you more than he already has.
“Wonwoo?” He calls with a mischievous grin, “Come play instead of me whilst I go get the food!”
Wonwoo hums a response as he moves to sit down next to you whilst you shoot death glares at your friend, who simply mouths ‘be nice’ before slamming the door behind him.
He picks up Mingyu’s controller and hovers over ‘Wario’s Gold Mine’.
“What are you doing?”
He looks at you, confused “Uh… choosing the best map?”
You laugh, “No no, my poor Wonwoo. This is the best map.” You take the remote from him and select ‘Koopa Cape’.
“Ooh, you’re so wrong.” he replies playfully.
“I’m never wrong.”
“That’s true.”
You catch yourself smiling as the race starts. Maybe you are wrong, maybe he’s not so bad.
“Oh my god, hit me with a shell again, I swear to god Jeon Wonwoo.” you exclaim as he surpasses you for the fourth time. He laughs, nudging you gently.
“I didn’t know you were such a sore loser.”
You look at him, forgetting about the game, “You don't know anything about me.” you say, under your breath. He turns to you, concerned.
“Huh?”
“Nothing.”
Turning back to the screen, you find that Wonwoo has stolen first place from you - again.
“Fuck.” you mutter, refocusing on the race, watching as a proud smile creeps onto Wonwoo’s face.
“Wow, Y/N actually lost for once!” Mingyu declares as he returns with the food, “I guess we finally found your match.”
“Shut up.” you bark back, rolling your eyes and leaning back against the couch. Wonwoo mutters a ‘good game’ before standing up with a smirk and leaving the room. You scoff at his slight obnoxiousness whilst Mingyu sits down beside you and begins unpacking the food.
“Are you gonna stop sulking and go get some plates?”
“Ugh fineee” you reply jokingly before getting up.
You’re completely lost in the kitchen, opening every cupboard in sight hoping to find some plates and cutlery.
“You good?” a voice calls from behind you. You look up to find Wonwoo leaning against the doorframe, slightly baffled by your snooping.
“Uh…plates?”
“Ah,” he says walking towards you, you step back until you’re caught by the kitchen counter. “Just up here.” he continues, reaching behind you to grab the plates.
He’s so close that, for the first time, you can smell his woody cologne strongly. Your heart speeds up as he places the plates down on the counter behind you, his hands resting on either side, trapping you.
You look up at him, breathless, as he scans your face. You’re silent, drinking him in, your hands fiddling with the hem of your hoodie. He lifts his hand, brushing your hair behind your ear.
“Can I kiss you?” he whispers against your lips.
You can only bring yourself to nod in complete disbelief at the sudden shift between the two of you, the magnetism drawing you together. He moves in closer to you, so close you can feel his eyelashes as they flutter against your skin and his breathing grows slightly heavier.
“Y/N, did you find them?” Mingyu calls from the other room. You’ve never moved away from a person so fast, separating yourself from Wonwoo immediately. You clear your throat, maintaining eye contact with Wonwoo, still flustered.
“Yep sorry! Just grabbing a drink.” Thinking fast, Wonwoo hands you a can of coke.
“Can you grab me one too?” Mingyu shouts.
You both laugh quietly as he hands you another. You nod and smile, leaving him in the kitchen and heading back to your food.
﹒˚ ₊ ︵﹒⊹ ๑ ︵︵ ๑ ⊹﹒︵
It’s a week before you see him again, your group's last meeting before the final presentation, a chance for you to go over the final details. The meeting is generally uneventful, everyone finally focused on the task at hand.
“I think if we switch the parts about culture and equity then it would flow better.” Wonwoo suggests.
“Hmm, I agree” you reply nonchalantly because, on this rare occasion, you actually do.
“What the fuck was that?” Seungkwan whispers to you.
“What?”
“You never agree with him.”
“He made a good point.” you shrug, brushing off your friend’s interrogation. Looking up you catch Wonwoo smiling at you, giggling under his breath like a teenager. You have to stifle the smile that begins creeping onto your face as you watch him.
“And that is why we believe that absurdism is an essential mindset to have in order to thrive in the modern day.” Seokmin argues, concluding your group project, finally. The six of you share reassuring nods and smiles, you’ve done your best and you’re happy with it, the rest is out of your hands.
As you exit the assessment room, Soonyoung pipes up, “Drinks, drinks, drinks, drinks, drinks?” He chants pointing at each of you as he does, the group mumbles a variety of agreements.
“Y/N?” Mingyu asks.
“Come on, it’ll be fun, try something new.” Seungkwan whispers.
You look at your friends smiling eagerly as they wait for your response, with an exhale and a nod, you give in, “drinks.”
At the bar, you crowd a small table, each with a drink in hand, talking and laughing about whatever comes to mind. You play games, sharing embarrassing childhood stories and weird facts you never would’ve learnt anywhere else. You are having fun, smiling, peaceful but, something’s off. You can feel it. He’s been quiet all night, barely even looked at you. It was annoying. It was annoying that it annoyed you, a few weeks ago this would have been normal behavior but now, it was different, it upset you, made you feel like you’d done something wrong, made you feel… unwanted.
Being truthful, you weren’t really feeling it tonight. If you had it your way you’d be on your couch right now watching a film. You weren’t gonna go, not until you saw his cheesy grin amongst your friends’, so sweet you could melt. He was the reason you went out tonight. Him, and Seungkwan’s words, you should try something new. You had never felt so overwhelmed by your own feelings, one minute you felt nothing short of hatred for Wonwoo and the next… your heart is fluttering every time your eyes meet.
During your daze, Wonwoo gets up to buy another round for the group, the sound of his chair moving snaps your focus back to the table but he’s already disappeared. You excuse yourself to the restroom, taking the chance to talk to Wonwoo whilst everyone else is distracted. Standing beside him, his eyes are fixed on his phone, reading some kind of article.
“Are you okay?” you ask him, nervous for his answer - you’re not sure what you’ll do either way. He looks up at you, soft dark eyes taking you in. He stands with an unreadable expression for what feels like forever before he finally opens his mouth to reply and then-
“Wonwoo! Come here quickly, settle this bet for us!” Sometimes, you really hate Soonyoung.
He shoots you an apologetic look and then, he’s gone, just like that. All the courage you had built up, wasted on an unanswered question. Fuck this. You grab your jacket, shooting Seungkwan a ‘don’t worry I’ll text you later’ look and head for the door. You’re exhausted, tired of it all, you just want to be in your own bed.
As you walk down the quiet streets, you hear another pair of footsteps catching up to you.
“Are you okay?”
You look at him. You’re irritable and know that you’re probably not going to say the right thing but what the hell.
“So you’re allowed to ask but I’m not?”
“No, that’s not- I… I’m sorry, I never know how to act around you, I never know what to say, I’m always doing the wrong thing but I-”
“Wonwoo.” you interject, “I can’t do this right now. Just… just go back to the bar.”
He doesn't respond, a silent understanding. He doesn’t leave either. He walks alongside you the whole way home, giving you quiet to think, offering you a comforting smile whenever your eyes meet. It breaks your heart just as much as it warms it, that he, despite your outburst, stays by your side when you need someone.
Even if you try to push him away, somehow he knows, he knows that you want him there.
﹒˚ ₊ ︵﹒⊹ ๑ ︵︵ ๑ ⊹﹒︵
With the group project over, you don’t see him as often as before, hardly ever when you’re alone. You decide to put him out of your mind for a while, to focus on work and the rest of your assignments. Wonwoo, though, seems to have a habit of sabotaging your plans.
It started off with simpler things, turning up at your work just to place a complicated order, smirking as he watches you struggle with it. Then on exam week, a bag of your favorite snacks appears at your door. On a random Wednesday, he orders a pizza to your apartment. On your birthday, a small cake. And, there’s not a week that goes by where he fails to visit the cafe, you’ve grown to look forward to his bizarre orders and playful teasing.
Once the professor announces the end of the lecture, you grab your laptop and walk towards the door where you’re met with a familiar face.
“Ah, the coffee fairy, what can I do for you today?” you greet him, playfully.
“Can we talk? I’ll walk you home.” he asks, his voice laced with anxiety.
“Okay…” you nod, curious as to why he’s acting this way.
Walking through campus, he clears his throat, “So…” he trails off.
“So?”
“So I don’t really know how to say this. I mean, maybe you already know but I mean… I’m sorry, I’m sorry if I upset you, or hurt you, or made you angry. If you hate me, that’s okay I just-”
“I don’t hate you Wonwoo. Not anymore, anyways.”
He chuckles softly, “Well, I just want you to know that I don’t plan on giving up I… I think this is it for me,”
“It?”
“You. I think you’re it for me. I think it was over for me the moment I saw you.” He takes a deep breath before continuing, “And I’m sorry about everything. Around you, I just, I forget how to act, I can’t think. It’s all just… you.”
As he speaks, your face begins to heat up under his gaze, a smile appearing on your face as you take his hand in yours hesitantly, squeezing it gently. Suddenly, he stops speaking, pausing to think.
“Wait… what do you mean you don’t hate me anymore?” You can only laugh at his question as he pulls you closer to him.
The walk back to your apartment is nice, peaceful even, like this is where you’re meant to be. You turn towards him to say goodbye and thank him for walking so far out of his way. He can’t hide his shyness as he says goodbye, stammering slightly with rosy cheeks. You look at him, hoping for more, but his eyes are fixed to the floor as he blushes. You laugh quietly, finding him incredibly endearing before turning away to enter your apartment.
Suddenly, you feel his hand reach for your arm, “wait.” he says, spinning you back to him.
The action happens so quickly, you’re basically pressed up against him, one of your hands finding his bicep to balance yourself. You look up at him, it’s clear that he’s still nervous but he’s doing his best to play it cool, his hand rests on your lower back as he pulls you even closer. The way he’s looking at you, like you’re the only thing he’s ever known, sends the color to your cheeks and you can feel your heart beating faster by the second.
His other hand finds your jaw as he leans his face closer to yours, his breath tickling your lips. His soft, puppy dog eyes search yours for consent, and just like in Mingyu’s kitchen, you can muster up nothing but a nod, your breathing getting shallower with anticipation, hunger.
His lips delicately brush yours, cautious and timid. You kiss him back warmly, he tastes like peppermint and cola, both new and familiar at the same time. He leans into you more, growing more confident as you part your lips, letting him explore you further. You fall into a perfect rhythm with butterflies fluttering throughout you and your grip on the other becoming firmer.
Remembering that you need to breathe, you break away from each other slowly. He rests his forehead against yours, sharing your breathless giggles and smiles of relief.
“Jeon Wonwoo.” you whisper, still in a daze.
“Hmm?” he hums happily.
“I’m pretty sure I don’t hate you anymore.”
“Only pretty sure?” he jokes, feigning upset.
“100% sure.” you correct yourself with a happy grin.
“Good.” he says, pecking you softly and then pressing another kiss against your cheek. “I almost went insane waiting for you to realize.”
“Realize what?”
He pulls you into a warm, strong hug, resting his head on your shoulder before whispering “That it was always you and me.”
﹒˚ ₊ ︵﹒⊹ ๑ ︵︵ ๑ ⊹﹒︵
“What’s going on with Wonwoo?” Seungkwan asks on your way to class two days later.
“What do you mean?”
“Something’s different… he’s brighter.”
“Why would I know anything about it, none of my business” you state, biting your lip to hide your knowing smile.
“Oh come on, don’t act like you haven’t noticed!”
“I honestly don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Bro, he didn’t stop smiling the entire time he was there, it was weird. He even spoke differently, lighter.”
You hum a manufactured surprised response as your friend continues.
“Maybe he met someone, he always talks about that person he’s liked since he moved here, maybe he finally made a move - i hope so I don’t know how much more of his schoolboy pining I can take.”
Your gaze is glued to the floor as you listen, knowing that you were the reason for all his changes and that he was the reason for all of yours. That he made the world seem new, brighter, happier.
﹒˚ ₊ ︵﹒⊹ ๑ ︵︵ ๑ ⊹﹒︵
“Are you okay? We haven’t talked in a few days.” Wonwoo says over the phone.
“I’m sorry, it’s just my thesis, I feel like I’m never gonna leave this apartment again.”
“That’s okay! I get it,” he reassures you, “talk to me about it.”
He listens intently as you babble about your thesis, humming along, asking questions and offering advice. Whilst you explain the block that you’re facing currently, there’s a knock at the door. Getting up from your laptop to answer it, you continue, “And now, I’m not sure where to go next.”
“With me.”
“Huh?”
Opening the door, he’s stood in front of you. His dark hair falling perfectly, as he runs his fingers through it, still holding his phone to his ear with a sweet smile and pride in his eyes.
Hanging up the phone, he clarifies, “take a break, let’s go for dinner.”
And how could you deny such a pretty face?
Walking the streets, he speaks passionately as he shows you his favorite spots around the city and you find yourself just happy to be here with him, to witness his excitement with a cheesy grin that you reserve for only a few people in your life.
“You’re quite the sweet talker, Jeon Wonwoo.” you say, giggling.
“Of course,” he responds proudly, “How else would I get to have you by my side?” With that he pulls you into a hug, his strong arms wrapping around you, swaying playfully from side-to-side and holding you as if you’re all he needs with him right now.
﹒˚ ₊ ︵﹒⊹ ๑ ︵︵ ๑ ⊹﹒︵
The elevator dings as the two of you stumble inside, your arms resting on his shoulders. Looking at him with adoration as he turns you gently, reaching his hand out to clumsily press the elevator buttons behind you. You giggle between kisses as you find your balance, clinging onto each other. You hardly notice when the elevator rings again outside your apartment, too busy with your hands tangled in his hair and his palms running across your sides in painstaking seduction.
Then he’s guiding you out of the elevator, hands still firm on your hips and not daring to break away from you for even a second. He slips his hand into yours, taking your keys and mindlessly fumbles to unlock the door.
It takes mere seconds once the door opens for him to slam it shut and have you trapped against the wall, he moves against you sloppily, licking into you with pure hunger and adoration, a tsunami of lust as his groans echo throughout your body.
“Fuck. If you’d just spoken to me on that first day, I would’ve made you mine then and there.” he whispers against your skin, trailing electric kisses down your jaw towards your collarbone.
You laugh in shock, lifting his lips back up towards yours, his cold hands sneaking underneath your shirt as you kiss him back feverishly. “Me? No, you were the one who ignored me.”
“Hmm” he responds breathlessly, turning you around and leading you to your bedroom. Drawn together like magnets, you both stumble across the room, hands and lips battling for the next sweet taste, the next wanting touch.
“Look how far…” his lips find yours again, “just a bit…” and again, “of communication can go” you finally manage to moan out.
“Are you gonna stop talking and be mine now or…?” he whines as you drag against his lips.
You giggle softly as he lifts your arms to rest around his shoulders, pulling you in by the waist before his soft mouth is reunited with yours.
﹒˚ ₊ ︵﹒⊹ ๑ ︵︵ ๑ ⊹﹒︵
You could never have imagined that you would come to find a safe space in Wonwoo. That you would eventually know him better than yourself. That the man you loathed, competed against, fought, would be yours. The man whose presence bothered you would soon be the one to hold your hand through good news and bad. That his happiness was your happiness, his sadness, his pride, his love.
You never could have imagined that he would be the one waking you up on Sunday mornings with sweet kisses on your collarbone. That, at night you would be drawing idle patterns on his chest. That even after waking up from your dreams, he’d still be there holding you. That his touch was the only thing you craved, his kisses your favorite greeting, his voice your favorite song. His gaze and gooey brown eyes which used to irritate you to no end, would soon become your lighthouse in the storm. You never could have imagined that you would love Jeon Wonwoo.
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