#i miss them and need book three asap

[livingasaghost]

love that we as a fandom have preemptively called book three of dark rise DARK KING when we don’t have an announcement or commentary from pacat or anything

itll be so funny if it isnt titled dark king but also what else is it gonna be called 😭 it kinda feels like when taylor told us that nobody found the title of LOVER in the me! video even though we absolutely did because it was so blatantly obvious

[blairxbear]

How they react to you texting them for help, only to find out there's just a spider in your room...

UA Part 1 / UA Part 2 / Pro Heroes / Villains

Pure fluff, chaotic misunderstandings, and lots of over-the-top reactions!

Featuring: Izuku Midoriya, Shoto Todoroki, Tenya Ida, Denki Kaminari, Mirio Togata, Hanta Sero, Koji Koda, Mashirao Ojiro

Izuku Midoriya

Your Text:

"Izuku, I need you! Please come quick!!"

His Reaction:

Instant panic mode.

Heart? Racing. Hands? Sweating. Brain? SHORT-CIRCUITING.

Immediately thinks you’re being attacked, kidnapped, or worse.

"O-oh my god! I’m on my way!!"

Sprints out of his dorm at FULL SPEED.

Doesn’t even think about grabbing anything—just runs like his life depends on it.

Arrives breathless, panting, eyes darting around for danger.

"Where?! What happened?! Are you hurt?! Do I need to call someone?!—"

You point at the spider on the ceiling.

Blink. Blink. Processing… ERROR.

He stares at you. Then at the spider. Then back at you.

"…So you’re��� not in danger?"

You shake your head, giving him an innocent smile.

You have never seen a man deflate so fast.

Rubs the back of his head, chuckling awkwardly. "Oh. Uh… yeah. I got this."

Calmly captures the spider and takes it outside, but internally? STILL RECOVERING FROM A HEART ATTACK.

Still asks if you’re okay at least three more times before leaving.

Bonus: He apologizes for freaking out, but also subtly reminds you that you should probably clarify next time.

Shoto Todoroki

Your Text:

"Shoto, please come quickly. It’s urgent."

His Reaction:

Doesn’t ask questions. Doesn’t hesitate.

IMMEDIATELY on his way.

Completely stone-faced but his brain is already running through worst-case scenarios.

Arrives at your place within MINUTES, his expression unreadable.

"I’m here. What’s wrong?"

You dramatically point to the ceiling.

He follows your gaze. Sees the tiny spider. Looks back at you.

Silence.

The longest, most painful silence.

He just… stares at you.

"…This is why you called me?"

You nod.

Another long pause. You swear you hear the Windows error sound in his head.

Without a word, he raises his hand and freezes the spider in a tiny ice cube.

Still staring at you. Still saying NOTHING.

Finally, he exhales. "…Would you like me to stay for emotional support?"

You say yes. He stays. But you don’t miss the way he gives you one long, deadpan look every few minutes.

Bonus: Todoroki never says it, but now every time you text him, he automatically assumes it’s spider-related.

Tenya Iida 

Your Text:

"Iida, I NEED HELP ASAP!!"

His Reaction:

IMMEDIATELY ON HIGH ALERT.

Slams his book shut, stands up so fast his chair falls over.

"I’M ON MY WAY!"

Grabs his emergency first aid kit because OF COURSE HE DOES.

Sprints to your location at full speed, engines roaring.

Practically kicks your door down.

"ARE YOU INJURED?! WHO DID THIS?! DO I NEED TO CALL THE AUTHORITIES?!"

You just wordlessly point to the spider chilling on your wall.

He stops. Looks at the spider. Looks back at you.

Adjusts his glasses, pushing them up with two fingers.

"…(Y/N). This is NOT what constitutes an emergency."

Still removes the spider because he’s an absolute gentleman.

But then proceeds to give you a five-minute lecture on proper emergency protocol.

"What if I had called the police?! Do you understand the magnitude of this miscommunication?!"

You’re just sitting there, nodding, pretending to listen while trying not to laugh.

Bonus: Next time, he still shows up at top speed—but he enters the room muttering, “If this is another spider, I swear…”

Denki Kaminari

Your Text:

"Denki, HELP!!!"

His Reaction:

PANIC. PANIC. PANIC.

"OH SHIT—HOLD ON, I’M COMING, BABE!!"

Runs out the door so fast he nearly faceplants.

Almost electrocutes himself in his rush to grab his phone and shoes.

Shows up at your door looking like he just ran a marathon.

"Where’s the villain?! Are we being attacked?! I’LL FIGHT SOMEONE—"

You point to the spider.

He follows your gaze. Blinks. Stares.

"…Bruh."

Goes completely silent for a full five seconds before BURSTING INTO LAUGHTER.

Doubles over, clutching his stomach. He CANNOT BREATHE.

You stand there, arms crossed, pouting as he wheezes.

Finally calms down enough to wipe away a tear.

"Babe… I thought you were DYING."

Still giggling, he grabs a shoe and smacks the spider, then turns to you with the dumbest grin.

"Crisis averted, ma’am. Your hero has saved the day!"

You smack his arm, but he just pulls you into a hug, still laughing.

“God, I love you, but you’re so dumb.”

Bonus: Will NEVER let you live this down. Brings it up at every opportunity. “Hey, remember that time you called me over for a spider? Iconic.”

Mirio Togata 

Your Text:

"Mirio, I NEED YOU RIGHT NOW. HELP!!"

His Reaction:

His hero instincts kick in immediately.

Drops whatever he’s doing.

"DON’T WORRY, (Y/N), I’M ON MY WAY!"

FULL-ON SPRINTS TO YOUR PLACE.

Busts through the door dramatically like he’s here to fight a supervillain.

"WHERE IS IT?! WHO HURT YOU?!"

You shakily point at the spider in the corner of your ceiling.

…Processing…

The realization hits. You see his whole body physically relax.

Covers his mouth, trying so hard not to laugh.

"Ohhh, I see the problem now. This is a high-level threat." 

Picks up the spider with his bare hands and carries it outside like it’s no big deal.

Turns back to you, grinning. "Do I get a reward for my heroism? Maybe a kiss?" 

He absolutely hams it up, flexing like he just saved the world.

You roll your eyes but kiss him anyway, and he BEAMS.

Bonus: Next time, when you text him, he replies with, "Spider or actual emergency? 😆" before coming over.

Hanta Sero 

Your Text:

"Sero, I need you RIGHT NOW. It’s an emergency!!"

His Reaction:

Spits out his drink. IMMEDIATE PANIC.

"WHAT?! BE THERE IN A SEC!"

Uses his tape to SWING to your location like Spider-Man.

Bursts in, slightly out of breath. "Okay, okay! What’s going on? Are we fighting?!"

You dramatically point at the spider on your desk.

Processing…

Face goes COMPLETELY BLANK.

Slowly turns to you. "…Babe. You texted me like you were about to get kidnapped."

You just nod, staring at the spider like it’s the devil.

Lets out the LONGEST sigh but still grabs a cup and a paper to get rid of it.

"I love you, but I also hate you for this."

Throws the spider out the window like a frisbee, then flops on your bed dramatically.

"I think I need a minute to recover from the heart attack you just gave me."

You laugh and offer to buy him a snack as an apology. He perks up immediately.

"Oh, now we're talking!"

Bonus: From now on, whenever you text him, he replies with, "Spider or actual life-or-death situation? I need to mentally prepare."

Koji Koda 

Your Text:

"Koji, please come fast! I NEED HELP!"

His Reaction:

Heart stops. Literal heart attack.

Sweating. Panic. Can barely type back.

"O-okay! I’m coming!! Hang on!"

Literally sprints to your room, almost trips on the way.

Bursts in, looking frantic.

"Are you okay?! What happened?!"

You shakily point at the spider chilling in the corner.

Absolute, complete silence.

Koji just stands there, processing.

Sweatdrop.

"…O-oh. Um. That’s… that’s the emergency?"

You nod, gripping his sleeve for dear life.

Despite his absolute RELIEF, he’s way too nice to be mad.

Instead, he gently talks to the spider. "U-um… please don’t scare (Y/N)… I’ll take you outside now, okay?"

The spider just… listens. It CRAWLS ONTO HIS HAND WILLINGLY.

You scream. He shushes you softly. "D-don’t worry! He’s just scared too!"

Gently takes it outside, talking to it the whole way.

Comes back, rubbing his neck awkwardly. "U-um… maybe next time, just call me instead of texting so scary?"

Bonus: Koji is now your official spider-removal service. He’ll even name them if you let him.

Mashirao Ojiro 

Your Text:

"OJIRROOOO PLEASE HELP ME IT’S AN EMERGENCY!!!"

His Reaction:

Mid-training session. Immediately stops what he’s doing.

"What?! Are you okay?? I’m coming!!"

DASHES TO YOUR ROOM AT FULL SPEED.

Tail twitching aggressively. He’s ready to FIGHT.

BURSTS IN, breathing heavily. "Are you hurt?! What’s happening?!"

You dramatically point to the spider on your ceiling.

He follows your gaze. Stares at it. Then stares at you.

"…(Y/N)."

He takes a DEEP, DEEP breath.

Pinches the bridge of his nose.

"I thought you were DYING."

You just pout, clinging to his arm. "It has eight legs, Mashirao."

He sighs, but there’s a tiny, affectionate smile.

Grabs a tissue, climbs on your bed, and SWATS the spider like a ninja.

Casually tosses it in the trash, then crosses his arms.

"Okay. But next time, maybe be a LITTLE more specific?"

Still stays for a bit just to make sure you’re okay.

Bonus: Whenever you text him now, he replies with, "Spider again?" before even reading the message.

Ko-fi / Masterlist

blairxbear © 2024. do not copy, modify, or translate my work. you do not have permission to share my work outside of tumblr!

[woodlandwizard77]

A Step by Step Guide to Losing Your D**k

I recently wrote a series of messages to my aunt talking about all the steps I need to do to get bottom surgery, a penile inversion vaginoplasty at Mt. Sinai, in the next year or two. Its a long list. And everytime I added something she had a sort of “wow thats rough” reaction, but to me its just the to do list. So I decided to write them all out.

Start transition DONE

Most insurance companies and surgeons require you to have socially transitioned and have done HRT for at least 1 year at the time of operation

For social transition, this was March of 2024

For HRT it will be January of 2025

Get a referral to a surgeon (I am here)

In my case, Mt. Sinai in Manhattan

My Doctor referred me, but Mt. Sinai takes self referrals

Start laser hair removal

Book a consultation (I am here)

Go to laser frequently enough to satisfy surgeon

Convince Mom and Dad to help out DONE

Get 2 letters

Social Worker (1)

PCP's Office

Social Worker (2)

Mt. Sinai

Consultation with Mt. Sinai’s team

Wait 3-6 months (I’m here)

Bring letters

My insurance only requires 2, less than Mt. Sinai thinks insurance will need, and Mt. Sinai provides 1 of them. Meaning the other is through IHS Behavioral

Schedule Social Work pre surgical consult appt

Schedule Mental Health and Medical Clearance with Registrar

Go to NYC for 1-2 nights, maybe for each, hopefully just once

Maybe also for Social Work thing

Consult with Surgeon

Wait until I’ve worked about 12 months to get short term disability

Probably summer (ASAP) and when Mom has time off

Do logistics

Book an airbnb, hotel, etc for recovery

Starting a few days after OR date and lasting a little over a month

Within a 90 minute drive of Mt. Sinai

Rural enough that Mom is comfortable to help and can go home if someone else shows up

Probably New Jersey, maybe Hudson Valley

Has at least 1, preferably 2, separate bedrooms

Has 2 beds

Has ADA accessible entry

Has a kitchen

Has a full bath, preferably and a half

Has internet and preferably a TV

Lodging for Mom + Dad/care team while I’m in OR

Probably 5-7 days

Preferably with a 1-2 day buffer period before OR date (included in the 7 day estimate) so I can enjoy the city

Either within a short walk from Mt. Sinai or on the same subway line as Mt. Sinai

RW, 1, or ACE

Someone to help me get from recovery location to Mt. Sinai while not in NYC

Develop and get list of items needed for recovery

Dilator

Pads

Gowns/loose clothing

Comfort food

Coordinate missing 8-9 weeks of work

Take care with who knows what before I leave

Inform HR, department manager, and work friends whats up

Get cleared for surgery and get an OR date

Probably a 6-12 month date from clearance

Get pre clearance testing through PCP or a lab in hometown

Go to NYC for that if need be

Week Before Surgery

No alcohol, no aspirin, NSAIDs, herbal supplements, or fish oil

Consult for other non aspirin blood thinners (which I am not on)

No alcohol for 3 weeks after as well

Tylenol/Acetaminophen is okay

Go downstate

See friends from NYC?

Bring Mom/Dad?

Do something fun in Manhattan

Get a COVID test

Take an anti-bacterial bath

Day before surgery

Breakfast before 9am

Last meal

Drink Golytely bowel solution around noon

Chemically induced diarrhea

Clear fluids only after golytely

(includes coffee, tea, water, broth, some juices)

Nothing goes in the stomach after midnight

Some medication okay with a sip of water

HRT??? (switched to injections)

Get surgery (a penile inversion vaginoplasty)

1 to 1+½ days

I’ve heard of as long as three

3-5 day hospital stay

Mom and Dad probably stay in Manhattan then

Go to recovery location

Drive with seat reclined

Stay for 4 weeks, pretty much bedridden

Go to follow ups

Dilate

Go home

Continue recovery for another 2-4 weeks at home

Follow up with PCP

Return to life

[tallulahneale]

Title: Brown Sugar

Pairing: Vince staples x fem!reader 

Summary: Vince and his bestie go for their monthly grocery shop, with the addition of usual antics.  

Word count: 3.3k

Warnings: Sexual content

It has been three weeks since Vince came back from his music tour and boy was he tired! Finally back to his humble abode with visits from neighbors, family and close friends. They came to congratulate and express their happiness, for his ongoing representation of the community. But none thought he might need more than words of affirmation. As of right now, he needs groceries. 

“I miss when folks stopped by with gift cards” He mutters as he waves the last guest goodbye, watching them drive off. 

With the preparation of season 2 of his show, his schedule has become much busier and takeouts were no longer feasible. He strolls through the hallway to the kitchen with plans to meal prep, opening empty cupboards and a single jar of grape jelly, the silence mocks him like the chirping of a field cricket.

But guess who loves to shop, is playful and never says no to him? He thinks knowing the perfect person to call.  

“Lula!” He snickers. 

It’s been a full month since she and Vince had gone grocery shopping together so this is perfect timing. Times like this, having a best friend who is the queen of nutrition and meal plans is a big deal. She is his go to shopping buddy, mainly for her keen eye for fresh produce and general laughs. He nods to himself swiping through his phone to the contacts list, the least he could do is check in and ask if she was free. The time reads 1:47 pm as Vince dials her number waiting for her to pick. 

“Finally!” Lula exclaims “I’ve been putting my grocery shop off because of your touring ass.”  

“You really don’t say hello, do you?” Vince grumbles 

“Again with this?” Lula tuts “Hello my love, need to go shopping?” 

“Is that why you think I called?” Vince questions back. 

‘Either she is telepathic or her spiritual readings are super in line with mine’ he thinks to himself.  

“Bestie!” She whines 

“Lula” He mocks 

“So, you are tired of takeouts?” She smirks, munching on oven baked kale chips. 

“And your lazy ass hasn’t been grocery since I left, huh?” He wits back. 

She huffs, a chip falling from between her fingers and onto her lap. 

“I did! The Uber driver was extra helpful” She beams, whispering the last few words already knowing what will come next. 

“Why didn’t you just drive?” Vince asks, shaking his head.  “…” She rolls her eyes, ignoring his question.  “Lula” He starts “You have a car, yes?”  “Yes”  “You have a license, yes?”  “Yes”  “Then answer the question”  “...I like when you drive me around” She looks away, feeling his presence in her room, “Plus you know I don’t like driving, quit sweating me.” 

“So that’s why you like doing your shops with me” He grins. 

“Okay Dr do-gooder, let me hang up-” 

“I dare you” He utters with conviction. 

Knowing Vince, he will cut the call and not call back, But will be nice enough to text and keep the conversation going. ‘Petty ass’ she thinks to herself, he did it once before and that was enough to put Lula in her place. 

“Damn son, I’ll stay on the line” She replies sarcastically.

“Yeah, that’s how I like you. Obedient.” 

Lula rolls her eyes and laughs. 

“Vince… We don’t play that anymore.” 

“...” He keeps quiet as his mind wanders off, slowly flashing back to the time when they- 

“Vincent!” Lula calls out, cutting his train of thought and bringing him back to the present. 

“Yeah yeah, anyway we need to go asap” 

“Yay! When are you coming to pick me up?” 

“Now” 

“Oh lawd! I need to tidy the kitchen, fix my hair, find a cute dress-” 

“Lula, relax we are just going to a store. Like we usually do” He interrupts.  “I mean, it is never just shopping with you… incase your booked and busy self forgot” Lula replies, hinting at the time Vince took her on a merry go round. From grocery shopping to the hardware store and then to his mums for a catchup dinner before finally taking her home.  

“That was once” Vince sighs 

“A really long once” She mumbles

“I’m 7 blocks away so go get dressed but not too cute this time, can’t be mean mugging for you anymore” 

“Boyyyy” She exaggerates “I am always cute especially with the way the girls stay sitting pretty.” 

Lula immediately FaceTimes Vince wearing her Lululemon tank top and her 2-week blowout in a bun. She smirks as he appears on her screen, adorn in his signature blue yankee hat. She gawks at the broadness of his shoulders and the expanse of his chest as he inhales deeply. She rests her phone on the table, angling to show the curve of her cleavage and rounded point of her nipples.    

“See?” She beams while staring at her screen.  

Vince takes a glance at his phone, peering at the suckable smooth skin hidden under her clothing. He tries to do a double take without her knowing and fails miserably. ‘Some things will never changes’ he thinks to himself at her playful antics.  “Put on some clothes, I’m 5 blocks away” He tells her. “No compliments for your babygirl?” Lula tease.

*click* 

Lula laughs to herself turning off her laptop and heads to the closet for an outfit. With the weather being perfect in LA, she opts for a blue dress and sandals. She brushes her hair into a neater bun, applies her Fenty Beauty 450 foundation and grabs her keys just as she hears the phone ring again.   

“I’m coming, I’m coming!” She purrs in a sultry tone. 

“Playful ass” Vince smirks shaking his head “I’m outside.” 

She heads to her front door and waves at him before ending the call. Locking up and opening the gate, Lula saunters over to the parked car. With each step she took her hips swayed and her girls took with her too, Vince can’t help but stare while unlocking the passenger door for her.  

“Hey Mr. Staples” She giggles. 

Vince gives her a quick once-over, taking in her outfit as she slides into her seat. He pulls out of the driveway, as Lula makes light conversation to easy the lingering tension. 

“So I made a list of stuff we both need” she states adding x3 to some of the items. 

“I’m making macadamia nut white chocolate cookies!” Lula announces gleefully  “Ooo Lula is about to show out!”   “You know that’s right” she agrees smiling. 

_________ 

Vince pulls in the parking lot driving closer to the entrance because Lula doesn’t like to be too far from the doors, he parks and switches of the engine. As she steps outs, Vince notices her outfit clinging to the cleft of her rear, with her curves flowing against the sides like silk. He quickly looks up hoping she didn’t catch him staring too hard, lucky her back is still turned away from him so he’s in the clear. 

“I can feel your eyes on me, Vince” Lula giggles as she peeks over her shoulder at him “Aren’t you meant to be mean mugging those men?” 

He looks over to where her hand gestures and of course, there were two men sneaking glances. He walks around taking a close position to where she stood, stepping close while resting a hand on her lower back, facing the nosey looky-loos. To his surprise one turns away while the other stood his ground.

Watching…

Waiting…

Taunting him.  

Vince smirks at the audacity of this random, as he slides his hands from around her lower back, across her tummy and up to her ample protruding chest. Lula yelps as he adds a little pressure to his hold, looking at the man across the lot. The stranger immediately looks away with huff following in the direction of his friend. Vince walks side by side with her, keeping his hand rested on the expose square-cut of her top.  “You can move your hand now.” She nudges.  “Nah, I’ll keep it right where it is” Vince says in a hushed tone, gently patting them “Plus you seem to enjoy it.” 

Lula kisses her teeth, walking away from him muttering curses under her breath.  “You wish!” Lula deflects. “Go get a cart, there’s a lot to do.” 

Lula makes her way to produce section with Vince following closely behind with their shopping cart. She places all the fresh items on the list in the cart, sorting the fruits and the veggies. Her craving for sweet potato pie is at an all-time high. Vince can already see the thought bubble rising above her head; peeling the potatoes for the pie and whisking the batter for dessert. He watches her intensely as she makes her way through the list, slowly filling up the cart with fruits, yams, legumes and a two plants. With a confused expression plastered on his face, he turns to look at her.  “Why the plant?” He inquires “Because it is springtime and that’s the best time for keeping a house plants!” She smiles. 

“Noted. But there’s 2…” 

“Yep! You need more green in your house and I’m not talking about money” Vince chuckles at her silly joke and shrugs in response.  “Unless its a Fiddle Leaf Fig, I don’t want it”  “Well they don’t have that here so I’m getting you this mint shrub, you can use the leaves in your teas” She adds gleefully. Vince reluctantly agreed as he watches her place them at the foot of the cart, away from the fresh produce. The simple action seemed harmless from where he stood, her cleavage was on full display, giving him an eyeful.

“What’s next on the list sugar tits?” Vince points to the paper in her hands.  

“Pastries!” She cheers excitedly, pointing to the section with freshly baked tarts, pies and sweetened bread. Lula is in awe at the variety, her sweet tooth is in overdrive totally oblivious to her surroundings and the calls of her name from Vince. 

“So your name is Lula?” Stranger says “What an alluring name.” 

She abruptly looks to her right at the sound of her name being spoken by an unrecognizable voice. Staring at the customer, wondering who he is, the tall hefty man takes her lack of response as a go ahead to introduce himself. 

“My name is Jamal” He indicates with his hand reached out to lift-up her own, placing a soft lingering kiss at her knuckles. Lula nods back in amusement, while looking at the pastries stored behind the glass windows. 

“I recommend the pecan and maple pastries.” He encourages. “Put them in the air fry for 35 seconds, it will blow your mind Lula.”  Rolling her name off his tongue like a prayer,

“That sounds so yummy, I love nuts in a dessert” Lula teases loudly, making sure both men hear her intended innuendo. The stranger howls at her joke while winking at her. As he reaches over to point at more nut filled pastries, his bicep rubs across the peak of her chest and a wanton breath escape from Lula, she quickly looks to the pastries for help. 

Vince who stood watching the whole display, had finally enough. He makes his way towards them stepping closer to Lula with disapproval written on his face. Her eyes meet his in a gentle plea not to act a fool at this very moment. He cocks up an eyebrow in a questioned expression to which she doesn’t seem to register. She looks away from him, back to Jamal then back to the pies. 

“Unbelievable.” Vince comments, ignoring her plea and disregards the stranger. He places him arm around the hook of her shoulder with his fingertips caressing her neck before plunging a hand down the front of her dress. He feels thin mesh lace material of her bra and the perkiness of her nipples. Lula squeaks, but makes no attempt to stop his firm grasp. 

“I-I’m sorry about him” Lula stutters “He just likes…to keep his hands warm.” 

Jamal waves off her apology, accepting the flimsy excuse and looks up at Vince seeing no issue with what is going on. 

“Have you tried almond croissants?” He continues “They are amazing in the air fryer, but mind the temperature so you don’t burn the outer layer.” 

From the corner of his eye, he glances to her chest as a second movement is made. Vince is a man of very few words, but many actions. He shifts his hand right past the thin lace and onto the skin of her full chest, gripping and pulling her closer as he tugs at the harden bud.  “You want me to suck them right here?” He teases, feeling and tugging at them “You want your new little friend to watch too, huh?” He takes his fingers away to suck on them, leaving a wet trail before situating them back on tight smooth orbs inciting a puppy like mewl from her lips.

Lula yelps in lust and embarrassment, pushing Vince and the cart into the nearest aisle. She untangles his hands away from her pebbled nipples as a shiver passes down her spine from the friction of his fingertips dancing along her skin. Shifting her bra into place, she turns to look up at him with a frown.

Vince stares at her with his usual nonchalant, deadpan expression. 

“Listen and listen clearly” He warns, “If you don’t want to flash your little friend over there and make a puddle right here, turn the fuck around.” 

Lula stands her ground, switching from a frown to a scowl. 

“Now Lula.” 

She remains defiant, hoping to call his bluff. 

He looks up from her, smirking as he meets the eyes of her intruding friend, still standing idly at the pastry section, then back down into her lustrous eyes. He smirks, gripping the curve of her hips with one hand while his fingers trace the line of her panties through the dress. 

“You wore panties today?” Vince mutters. 

He leans her body closer to his chest as he flips up back of the dress exposing her rear end. She whimpers quietly pushing out her lower half for his attention, closer to the palm of his hand and delicate touches of his fingers. Vince groans into her ears, giving her a sharp swat on both cheeks while inching further to the wet spot forming at the middle of her cotton briefs. He cups her centre, feeling it pulse against his fingers. He slowly pushes into the hollow of her aching wetness through the fabric. Lula is slowly melting like the chocolate ice cream in their cart. He feels her arms shake as she clings to the back of his shirt. The steady breaths on his chest and flutter of her lashes as he nibbles on her ear, whispering praises and sweet words to her. He returns back to her cleft, pulling her panties across to expose her cheeks to the open. He grinds his growing bulge against her thighs as he ventures to her sensitive nub. She salivates at the firmness and intensity of his length, but as she feels the friction of her panties and his thick fingers against her clit, an electric shock brings her back to reality and she realizes where they are. Swiftly, she pulls away from his hold and the fabric of her dress returns to its place. On turning around, the pastry guy was stood watching the whole ordeal. He takes in her flushed look and trembling legs. Jamal freezes as their eyes meet while Vince is smiling smugly, proud of his performance. 

Lula rushes away from the aisle, the pastry section, Jamal, Vince and everything. Little did they know… she wasn’t embarrassed. No, she wanted more. On her exit she finds a hidden corner where she hastily removes her soiled panties, putting it in her purse.

Vince finds her in the drinks and beverages section and rolls their cart towards her.

“Tryna get me ban from our nearest Costco” She mutters. She is still grumbling while looking for the last few groceries on the list. He tiptoes behind her and leans to her ear.

“I wasn’t going to stick my fingers into your pretty pussy. Or did you want me to?” He says.

“Yes please” She whines barely above a whisper “I’m not wearing panties anymore.” Vince stills in disbelief, looking at her, waiting for the punchline of the joke. There was none. Lula nods her head as she bends over their cart, giving him a glimpse of her puffy slick lips. He drools at his mouth and drips from the tip of his lower head. He reaches to spank her right on her awaiting pussy, but the pastry guy passes through the aisle avoiding eye contact with them.

“Fix up babygirl, it’s neither the time nor place”

“Bite me” She snarls at him.

With her hair in a bun and her neck fully exposed, he sucks along the pulse of her neck. Placing kisses from the top down to her clavicle. He bites at the warm smooth surface “Tastes like brown sugar” He mutters. 

“You’re corny!” Lula giggle as she moves away from him “The list is all done, lets go.”  

When they reach the checkout, a short lady with thick curls sitting behind the register, leers at Lula. Vince is not too bothered, everyone is fond of Lula her aura is super infectious and rubs you the right way. Lula winks back at the lady and waves her fingers in greeting. He watches the interaction with interest while placing items of the conveyor belt. The cashier glances at Lula then Vince then back again at Lula, questioning of the status of their friendship. Vince reads her expression and shares a little secret. 

“You should’ve been at the pastry section” He looks down at Lula grinning, before looking at the lady. Lula shakes her and the cashier laugh. 

“Jamal told me the whole thing” The lady replies with a wink. 

Lula blushes while Vince smirks. 

“Your friend is very cute” She adds, while scanning their items “I’d have my hands full with her”  

“Girl! If only you knew!” Lula sings in her best Patti LaBelle impression. “All these months and he still can’t handle my juicy fruit”

The lady giggles in delight at Lula singing and her outlandish outburst.

“Lula, you sure you want to play this game?” He asks as he packs their items into grocery bags. “No more aisle to run to babygirl.”

“Ooo big daddy is putting you in your place!” The lady shrieks.

Lula looks up at Vince with her best puppy dog expression, as she thanks the cashier before walking towards the exit.  

Vince rolls the cart to his car and loads the bags in the trunk and back seat while Lula sits pretty in the passenger seat. 

“Guess who wrote on the back of the receipt?” Vince shares. “Really?” She cheers as she snatches it from his hand to add the number to her contacts “I could see us playing together sometime.” 

Vince smirks at her honestly as he rolls the cart back, before driving off. 

“You good baby girl?” He asks  

“Yes” she replies with a nods 

“Are we good?” He checks again 

“Not until you finish what you started” She teases “Now take me home Mr. Staples.” Vince chuckles as he drives off. 

——— 

“You’re lucky I’m taking you home this time” He indicates as they pull in to her driveway “Next time we’re wandering again.”

He unpacks her grocery bags into her kitchen, embracing her as he moves to get back in the car. 

“I’ll see you next month.” 

“Nope, I will be seeing you in 2 weeks, need some work clothes and that means changing rooms” She winks, dashing inside before he can reply.

-fini- 

[trips2saturn]

towl spoilers below!!!!!!!!!

⬇️

⬇️

⬇️

late briefing but it’s here and that’s what matters!!!!! let’s get into this episode! ❤️‍🔥

this episode was amazing. no notes. angst fuels me, so keep it coming in episode four along with some loving intimacy! 🤝

michonne is the most clever, headstrong, charismatic, fearless powerhouse of a woman in the entirety of twdu. there is no situation nor circumstance that she cannot handle. no matter the time, skill, or hardship that woman is going to do whatever she fucking wants. she’s such an admirable character, and yes this is just a fictional show but she means so much to me. tv mom forever and ever and ever. my lovebug!!!! 🫶🏼

rick… my og lovebug. his selfless, tender hearted yet courageous and dangerous personality is sooo missed recently because of these losers who love to keep playing hide the donkey. he’s been so beaten down and forced into the caged mindset, also known as stockholm syndrome. it hurts so much to see it affect him so deeply, especially in this episode. we truly get to understand just how horrified he is of losing michonne, losing judith, losing their home. it’s so layered that he’s come to the conclusion that he has to do whatever it takes to protect his wife and their children (judith for now until further notice). even going as far as pretending to break michonne’s heart just to get her to go back home for the sake of a safe and secured future. and as much as it rips his entire psyche into shreds, this man is a family man. his priority in life is to protect the ones that he loves by all means necessary.

and thank fucking HEAVENS that despite their years apart, michonne knows her husband like the back of her palm and can read him like a book!!! every word that poured out of his mouth was utter bullshit merely for safety purposes and i’m soooo glad that she understood that without even having to retaliate verbally.

she retaliated by throwing them out of a moving chopper LMAOOO 😭 MY GIRL, MY LEADING LADY!!!!!! CAN WE MAKE SOME NOISE FOR THE CRAZIEST CHARACTER IN THE ROOM. thank youuuuuu! i digress.

“we needed a timeout” shdjshdhsjdjs well yes! please knock some sense into your traumatized husband. he needs his wife!!!

moving forward. the phones!!!! “believe a little bit longer”!!!!! CARL MENTION!!!!!!??????!!!!! 😨🫨🥺☹️😖 rick not mentioning any names for three years and never liking any drawings of his son because they could never be depicted perfectly 😣😣😣 try not to cry challenge [FAILED]. punching me in the gut would hurt less. still hoping for a random chandler cameo too :D

i know that what rick said was absolutely fake and futile but as a fierce michonne lover… HER FACE AS HE SPOKE??? if we don’t see him loving on her endlessly in episode four… i might throw myself out of a moving helicopter.

one hundred percent positive that they’ll be pouring bisquick and making pancakes next episode. i’m sat.

thorne is a D. not an A. she’s a piece of shit and will be dealt with eventually. michonne will handle any light work. i rest my case.

jadis is a sexual predator and a grade-A loser with a shit haircut. i almost pissed myself laughing when rick said that. he’s been waiting and so have i!!!! 😁 but yeah she sucks. die asap.

RICHONNE KISS IN THE WOODS AFTER BEING A POWERHOUSE COUPLE. 🥹 reminded me so much of when they took those cars and drove into that herd of walkers. ugh. please put their entire love story into the louvre.

last but not least because i’m tired — unsure what beale is up to. he’s so sketchy, and also SO CONFUSED about rick supposedly having a briefing with him about being promoted?! NO. no thanks we didn’t ask for him to ever be a leader nor get kidnapped in the first place!!!! scared to see what lies ahead for the next three episodes :(((((

in conclusion, michonne is the most beautiful angel to walk the earth. she looked so hot in every single scene. episode three is hands down my favorite episode yet, despite the hardship. again, angst fuels me. so excited to see what’s in store next week, and every other week after that!!!! it’s only up from here. ❤️‍🔥⬆️

okay that’s it. hope everyone enjoyed the episode!!!! this is such a wild ride, and i’m happy to have my television parents back on my screen, making things happen again. 🌟🔥

[xzaddyzanakinx]

So like i'm chronically ill and i suffer a lot from pain and fatigue and it can get really disheartening and demotivating at times.

How do you think Anakin would act with a chronically ill partner?

I’m not too well versed on any chronic illnesses other than POTS (family member has it)

But thinking of her/her symptoms/issues here’s what I came up with:

You wake up stiff and and your joints just don’t seem to work properly? Anakin will be late to work just so he can get your heating pad, your coffee and breakfast, along with some snacks for later. He’ll be so sweet and give extra cuddles before he puts on some bio-freeze for you (he hates the smell but he loves you so it’s worth it)

You’ve had a great day, a productive day, so good that you made plans… and now you have to cancel them. He understands, he likes being home and cozy on the couch with you better than being out in public anyway. He’s secretly happy that he gets to skip out on drinks at the bar with your friends, that means he has you all to himself.

You promised you’d fold the laundry and do the dishes before he got home from work, but you only got halfway through before you had to take a break… that small break turned into four hours. Anakin doesn’t mind, he’s just happy you are taking care of yourself and letting yourself rest when you need to. He hates it when you push yourself too hard and you end up worse off.

He takes you to all of your doctors appointments, he takes off work the full day if he can. He knows appointments are stressful for you (they stress him out too). Anakin will make a full day out of it. Coffee and donuts for breakfast, lunch at your favorite place after. If it’s a long distance appointment he packs you a bag for the car ride full of: snacks, water (no soda or juice bc he has to force feed you water; he knows you don’t drink enough when he’s not home!!!), a book, your headphones, chargers, fidget toys, and most importantly Hot Hands bc you can’t have your heated blanket in the truck😕

Your pain is 10/10 and you can’t even pick up the phone to call him like you do every day on his lunch break. He’s immediately on his way home, if he’s not there already. Anakin has anxiety through the roof when you don’t respond to texts so you miss three? He’s coming home asap. You don’t answer a call? You best believe he’s leaving work without a second thought, he’s not wasting a moment to even tell his superiors he’s leaving.

He manages all your meds for you.

He makes all your appointments and keeps them neatly on the fridge calendar.

He surprises you with little treats as much as possible.

Anakin’s a homebody, he enjoys the comforts of your shared space, so even your hospital stays are treated like nights at home. He brings all your favorite things, doesn’t matter if it’s a one night stay. He’s bringing your pillow, your blanket, stuffies…

He knows more about your illness than the doctors at this point. He’s basically a specialist. Countless hours of research and learning not only to understand it better, but also to help you cope.

He keeps a record of all your appointments in a binder to track your medical progresses/declines.

He helps you get a service dog, he’s so good at redirecting/educating people in public when they get too close or try to pet them.

[gatheredfates]

Greetings everyone! If you're thinking to yourself 'Wow, it's been a bit since Sea updated the Compendium', you'd be right! I've been (unfortunately) dealing with that demon we call burnout. However, I am determined not to let it win, even if it's capping my own creativity/drive at the moment, which is why I bring you an update to the Compendium. ✨

If you know of any communities I have missed, please reach out to me via my Discord or the Google Form.

However, as of 09/29, the following communities have been added to Sea's Community Compendium for XIV Creatives.

EVENT / COMMUNITY SPACES

The Cursed Carbuncle—The Cursed Carbuncle is a Cabinet of Curiosities & Oddities which sells alchemical reagents, curios, cursed items, intriguing artefacts, luxury objects, occult, rare books, taxidermy & unusual finds.

LORE

How Rare is that Job?—An Unofficial, Opinionated Look At Class/Job Rarity For FFXIV Roleplayers, created by Mis’to Raesthe on the Odin Server.

MISC

Leyla's Gposing Guide—This website is an ongoing comprehensive gpose guide that helps you every step of the way from the vanilla gpose menu to using shaders and posing tools/plugins, complete with screenshots and video guides, as well as pose/edit-along videos. It's also meant to allow many people to submit their own guides and tips.

So You Wanna Start Roleplaying in FFXIV—(Specifically, on Crystal Data Center). But It Sounds Really Scary And You're New And How Does This Even Work Anyway? A FAQ by By Nevivi Nevi/Lenneth Andrew of Balmung.

Have you thought about joining our Tumblr Community? You can find it here!

Want to submit? You can either fill out the google form here or send me an ask with the relevant information!

Is my space suitable for the Compendium? Most of the time, yes! Below the read more is some more information/stipulations. This is all publicly available on the document.

Below are the following things I do not accept on the Compendium:

Personal/Single-Character LFC ads. (Though these get posted to the SEAFLOOR Tumblr Community when I find them!)

Content intended for or can be used for bullying, harassment and OOC gossip. E.g. ‘Secrets’ blogs, receipts, callout posts, etc. This does not include IC tabloid blogs or other ventures used to generate roleplay.

Communities that do not have an RP/writing element (large-scale exempt).

Anything I find personally distasteful or goes against the spirit of this project.

Common-sense rule applies.

I want to put my community on the Compendium but we have an application process. Is this okay?

Yes! Just note somewhere in your application that's a requirement. The only thing that is mandatory for the Compendium is that you must be open to new members or have a public-facing/accessible facet. There's no point advertising a community if no one can join it in some way!

I want to put my Community on the compendium but I only have x number of members —

Also totally okay! People don't start with large communities. Activity is a must but, whether your server has two or two thousand members, if you're looking for new people to join, I'd love to help you find people.

I want to put my community/resource on the Compendium but I worry its too niche?

Okay, and? If your Eorzean Fishing Alliance has four members but you roleplay every second weekend, I still want to know about it. The same goes for resources; if it's relevant to the game, it'll be useful to someone.

How active does a community need to be?

If you find a community has not been active in about two/three months, send me a message and I'll take a look at it. Communities have ebbs and flows, especially event spaces that may take hiatuses depending on member interest/life events. I'm not strict in my implementation provided a space isn't dead. If a link or anything is broken, contact me asap!

I have [insert a question not stated here]?

No drama! Send me an ask or use the #Compendium channel in my Discord!

[buglegs]

irritating (england x f!reader)

new in the building and hating life, reader meets her boss's closest associate for the first time a/n: hi. i cant believe i did this. i haven't written fanfic in a fat minute. if this opener goes down well, i'll turn it into a series. i do actually want to write multiple parts so we'll see

Part 2

With a cat in my lap, a book in one hand and a cup of tea in the other. Oh boy! I sure was enjoying my day off.

A day off from the world.

But, oh, no. Who could've guessed it?

My manager was calling. On my bedside table sat my phone, face up, screen illuminated displaying 'work.'

Eight in the morning and already I wanted to die.

"Oh, day off, how I've appreciated you so," I spoke theatrically to myself, setting my book down and reaching for my buzzing phone, "What do you think they want, kitty?"

Your joy, more than likely. Undoubtedly said my telepathic cat.

"They've rescheduled the conference for nine-thirty this morning, get here asap, no one else in the area is available and Mr Jones likes an assistant to be present at all times." Spoke the voice on the opposite side of the line, "Floor 9, Pasaulinis conference room written on the door, can't miss it."

Kitty was right. They wanted my joy.

I'd been recently hired as a secretary for my boss's boss, Mr Jones.

They said secretary, but aside from unpacking in the new building, all my responsibilities had consisted of retrieving coffee from the café downstairs and taking men's coats.

I suppose it'd be silly to complain, considering my rates…

Sigh. "Okay! I'll see you soon," I responded cheerily, though my face certainly wouldn't have shown it. I hung up before they could say anything more.

I checked the time and -- Oh, great heavens! It was near time to leave. Wonderful.

With much regret, I ushered my cat out of my lap so I could take a rushed shower and be on my merry way.

One rushed shower and a coffee later, I was exactly where I needed to be,

Looking up at a big, fugly corporate building. God, I hated these motherfuckers. But they paid me suspiciously well, couldn't hate them too much.

I made my way in, saying my socially-obligatory hello's and how-are-you's to my fellow staff members and making a beeline for the elevator with the least people within it.

I eyed the buttons, noting '9' was already lit, along with 3, but who gives a fuck about floor three when you're headed for nine?

In the lift with me was a cleaner, and an extremely well-dressed bloke with, undeniably, the best eyebrows in the entire cosmos.

I knew immediately Eyebrows must've been headed for the conference room, by his 'I'm so much better than you' demeanour. Conference-goers tended to have that.

At floor three, the cleaner shuffled out, pushing her trolley with her.

The doors shut, and with a ding, the elevator ascended.

It's just us now, Eyebrows. Me and you. You and I. You're the type to correct people on that, I bet. God, you're insufferable.

My jaw clenched as he turned his head to me and spoke,

"Excuse me, miss,"

Oh, an accent. British. I could have guessed…

I looked at him, a polite smile stretched across my lips, "Sir?"

"Would you happen to be heading to the World Conference?"

Oh, that's right. The corporation's name is 'World.' How the hell did they get away with that? I mean that's such a… oh. What was it called again?

"I am," I nodded, then averting my gaze. He was pretty.

Too pretty. Can't look at pretty people too long. They burn my eyes. That's why I can't spend too much time in the mirror. Zing!!

"Excuse my bad manners… I'm Arthur, Kirkland." He introduced himself, offering his hand,

"y/n… l/n," I reached out for his hand. His handshake was more of a delicate hold. It was so…

"Are you a country-?" He questioned. I didn't notice the look of dismay that crossed over his face after speaking. Though, it wouldn't have given me any hint as to what he could have meant.

"I'm sorry? I… don't think I understand," I spoke sheepishly, retracting my hand, "I'm Mr Jones's assistant. I, uh, I bring him coffee."

He chuckled, "I suppose you know then that he's a bit of a brewzilla," He joked.

My eyebrows knit together in confusion, "Brewzilla-?" I laughed softly, "He is a bit of a monster before his first coffee in the morning, I guess."

His eyes lit up. I guessed I picked up on his pun exactly as he intended.

Maybe this conference-goer wasn't so insufferable...

Pfft. Naw. They all suck.

The elevator dinged, the doors spread apart and we both stepped out, looking down the long hall way.

"You wouldn't happen to know which room we're supposed to be in?" He asked, just as clueless as I.

"Uhh… My manager said… I think… Pasaulo? Pasauli?" I shrugged and shook my head. I must've looked like a complete tool. So unprofessional.

"Ah, Pasaulinis?" He corrected, pointing toward a door that was labelled as such.

What the fuck is even a Pasaulinis? Does that mean something?

We headed in. He even held the door for me, can you believe? No one's ever held a door for me.

Inside was a long oval table, surrounded by at least a hundred seats. I hoped and prayed to whatever Gods they wouldn't all be filled. It seemed about everyone who was going to arrive had arrived, by the relaxed, almost friendly chatty air about.

At the head of the table was Mr Jones, who was getting his papers into order.

He hardly acknowledged me before throwing a quip at Mr Kirkland, who paid him no mind.

Mr Kirkland gave me a quick 'it was nice to meet you' before making his way over to an unclaimed seat, and loudly, Mr Jones called me over, handing me a sheet of paper and a pen.

"Is this… a non-disclosure agreement?" I questioned with hesitation.

"Uhhh, duh! Says it right there!" He laughed, "Don't worry, it's just a formality, dude!"

Dude. God, I'll never get used to that. In a place like this.

"If you say so… Homie…" I sighed, signing the paper and handing it back to him. The previous day, he'd insisted I refer to him as either homie, home-dawg or home-slice. Couldn't tell you why.

He gave me a nod, signalling to close and lock the door, which I did before promptly heading to stand behind him. At his command, ready to be ordered about and obey like a dumb little dog.

With everything seemingly out of the way, the meeting was in session.

-

So… Standing in at my first conference for… What is the company called again?

It remained unclear. I'd seen it tens of times before, and heard it spoken, but for some odd reason, it never stuck.

At the end of the conference hall, I stood idle, hands cupped together at my backside. I stared down at the plain grey carpet, feet already beginning to ache in my heels.

I'd taken secretary-assistant-intern-whatever gigs before. They'll hire you so long as you look pretty and have some data entry experience.

I never took much in from conference meetings. They were all the same, usually. A bunch of entitled men all gathered around a big table, having a pissing contest. Who had the best idea always boiled down to who could best assert the size of their cock. Figurative cock. Dominance, I mean. That's probably a better word, huh?

"…Regarding the development of Cabo Verde…"

This one seemed no different, except the NDA I had to sign was made out to be a bigger deal than ever before.

Still, I had little interest.

"So what do you propose is to be done about this… Problem?"

What was different about this environment was that these guys seemed to be at the top of something. They weren't employers. They had employers employing employers employing employers employing staff.

"Miss (I/n)," Spoke Mr Jones as he twisted his body to face me,

"Coffee, pronto!" He had a sort of… Charisma. He was an animated man. Caricaturial, almost.

"Goodness, Alfred, is that any way to speak to a lady? You could at the very least have said please." Said Mr Kirkland, posh sounding accent shining through.

Mr Kirkland had made an impression on me as being kind, although seemingly hot-headed, by his outbursts during this meeting.

He was funny, witty, and I'd be a big fat liar if I were to say I didn't take note of how irritatingly handsome he was.

Still, he was a corporate know-it-all, and that meant I'd refuse to see him in any other light.

Although his butting in did make me crack a grin because;

Yes, Alfred, you could've at the very least said please. How difficult is it, really?

Mr Jones only rolled his eyes.

Now that I was looking at them both, I noticed somewhat of a resemblance. It'd explain the dynamic that was presenting itself.

"Can I get anything for anyone else?" I questioned, looking around the room.

Hands raised. So many hands. And so I made my way around the table, taking orders down on a small pad.

~

thx 4 reading <3 Part 2

[st4rlight-kayz]

Kisses Of Death

Synopsis: Briar was not just a party girl. She was also a fucking serial killer. Meanwhile Ashlynn's the victim of her dark, twisted actions. She's just following her around like the puppy she is.

A/N: This might be my last eah fic, or not. Because, I wanna write about other fandoms and experience with them ofc. dw I'm not quitting eah fics! I just need a break from writing about them. (This fic is OOC,, please.. no complaining in my comments or reblogs. Go yap about this to ya mama and not me😭.) Cupid's the first to die, sorry CA Cupid lovers.

Genre: Horror (romance and angst if you squint)

Fandom: Ever After High

cw: slashing (mentioned) various weapons, character deaths, inappropriate language, victims pleading for their lives/future, Briar showing no mercy/remorse, homicidal tendencies, bruises, obsessed feelings about Ashlynn, stalker. dark themes, manipulation and drugging. (if I missed any lmk)

WRITTEN - 11.16.24

FINISHED - 11.18.14

Taglist * @smileyfacemojisworld @eahravenmh @rebellore @athena-xox @fashion-foxy @oldmarriedwife @eternalerror @epicfairyfail @ellarain @forsakenostalgia @birdbombs714 @beezonia @applewhitehorse @aniovandoblog @sparklyfarmfreakpaper @storylinefanfic @kittycheshired @aestheticsaddicted @dremiruu @dayo-seign @nmixieee @kae-eee @dayo-seign @gayestwizardlord @dremiruu @evry1luvzbrae

Blondie's MirrorCast Show:

Yeah. This was terrible. 8 unalive teenagers was truly sickening, not to mention that they were friends with Briar Beauty.. they pleaded for their lives then boom. Dropped dead. And Briar was having a thrill w/ this killing spree. Or that could be a stupid rumor going around. The students at Ever After High don't know their lives could be next on Briar's body count list.

"Well.. that's all for Blondie's MirrorCast show! Be sure to tune in next week for the update on the slasher~" Blondie blew a kiss at the screen, meanwhile Dexter was holding it he pressed the 'UPLOAD' button and a voice was heard from her tablet. Blondie smiled in satisfaction.

"Hopefully the students love this episode! Blood, sweat and tears." Blondie exaggerated. Dexter chuckled, giving her tablet back and walking to Chemythstry class. They'd have a project due on Wednesday and had to finish it asap.

While Ashlynn was on her way to Advanced Ballet, she left something in her locker. She'd twist the combinations until a weird feeling came out of nowhere.. the feeling like she was being watched and she was.. all of a sudden a tall girl was tapping her shoulder, she slowly turned around and jumped.

"Briar? What class should you be in right now." Ashlynn asked with a bit of nervousness in her voice. Briar really didn't feel like going to class today.. But since she was on the Honor Roll and had to stay on top of that, she sighed.

"Arts and Crafts." She mumbled, Ashlynn raised a eyebrow in confusion.

"Wait what? Speak up.."

"I said Arts and Crafts." The other girl nodded, biting her lip. She turned around back to face her locker, again. Twisting the combination and grabbing her book. "What class are you heading to?" Briar said in a curious tone. Ashlynn turned around face-to-face with Briar.

"Advanced Ballet, which I should be goin-" Briar's eyes widened and she grabbed Ashlynn's hand, kind of holding her back. "..My bad, attachment issues." Briar rolled her eyes, letting her hand go. She walked away after that. Ashlynn looked very dumbfounded.. but she shrugged it off and walked to Advanced Ballet now.

3:23 In the afternoon, Lizzie was in the library and she was reading a Romantic Novel, it was her favorite place to relax when classes were over, or stressing her out. She heard three familiar voices and raised a eyebrow in confusion.

"Why do we have to have to put all the books in alphabetical order?! Oh my Godmother this is gonna take ages.." Madeline leaned against the bookshelf, trying to catch her breath. Apple gave her a frown, crossing her arms.

"At least the Step-Sisters assigned us three to do this, and we're willing to finish it by anything means." Apple patted Madeline's shoulder, smiling. Raven was listening to Tailor Quick in her headphones, she took them out and gave an agreement nod. "Yeah, Mads! It's not that bad."

Lizzie closed her book and walked to the girls, still with that confusion written on her face. "What did you guys do?"

"Okay, so.. Me, Raven and Mads here accidentally- like I said, accidentally threw a hextbook at Faybelle because she was being mean to Madeline and we.. ended up here. But Raven and Madeline insisted on helping me put these books in alphabetical order." She smiled sheepishly. Lizzie sighed disappointingly.

"Oh my Grimm, Apple.. well, since I'm here? I'll help you out. On the other hand, at least 4 is better than 3, right?"

"That's Hat-tastic! Thank you so much Liz!" Madeline smiling, hugging her. Lizzie smiled and squeezed her back. Few minutes later they were exhausted. "Let's get a drink or snack.. I'm tired." Raven stood up and walked out, the other girls followed behind her.

---

7:12, evening.. The night of Briar's party. Music was blasting, alcoholics were getting drunk out their minds. Ashlynn was sitting on the nearby couch, she was evidently forced to be here, she could be in her dorm, sleeping. But nope, stuck here with underaged, drunk teenagers. Farrah came up to her, she wasn't the least sober.

"Lemme guess, forced to attend?"

"Obviously." Ashlynn held the red cup of Rum, she didn't dare to drink it because Briar might've spiked it or tried to drug her. She sat it on the nearby table, crossing her arms. "What's wrong?" Farrah asked her, she shook her head, walking to the bathroom.

Briar and Cupid were talking by the kitchen counter. It was a friendly conversation between them until it got not-so friendly.. few minutes later Briar noticed Cupid talking to Ashlynn on the couch, just coming back from the bathroom. She spotted them and Briar's eyes had fire behind them. She silently raged in her head, eye twitching and all. Clenching and unclenching her fists, she calmed down and called Cupid over again.

Handing her a special drink. (The drink was spiked, she got drugged..) Few seconds after drinking Cupid felt lightheaded, her body temperature felt very hot. Her mind was felt with dizziness & fuzziness..

"Is my vision going black? Briar? What'd you do-" before she could speak again, she was drugged out her mind. She collapsed on the cold, freezing ground. Briar smugly smiled at her unconscious body, stepping over her and walking to Ashlynn.

"Ashh! I missed you so much!" Briar squeezed her a little bit too hard, her ribcage felt it was gonna break. Ashlynn panicked, trying to wiggle herself out. Finally letting her to get a grasp of air. She looked over at her untouched cup, Briar crossed her arms and shook her head.

"You didn't drink it.." Ashlynn scrunched up her face. "First of all, you might've tried to drug me? I don't even drink Rum to begin with." Briar rolled her eyes, locking eyes with Ashlynn. "Buzzkill, let loose for once! You only live once upon a time." Briar shrugged. Ashlynn nodded in a 'no' gesture and the other girl frowned.

"Fine." Cedar, who attended the party saw Cupid. Hand over her mouth so she doesn't end up throwing up, she wobbled backwards and ran to Briar.

"Briar! I- I saw Cupid, she's just laying there! Do you know what happened?!" Cedar was so.. easy to manipulate. Does she realized that Briar Beauty is the one who drugged Cupid? Ashlynn raised a eyebrow, hand on Briar's shoulder. Cedar and Briar were now face-to-face.

"No, sorry Cedar.. when I was talking to her she just- passed out? Maybe she was overheated." Lies. Briar gave a 'innocent' look.

"Check to see if she still has a pluse, CPR. Anything." Ashlynn chimed in, Briar rolled her eyes at Ashlynn's suggestion, no doubt that was gonna work.

"Okay.." Cedar smiled nervously. Briar turned back around to face her girlfriend. Ashlynn yanked her hand and took her to a far-away place from the party.

"I know what happened to those 8 teenagers." Ashlynn blurted out, breathing slowly. "Why would you- That's so sick. I can't even see myself to be in public with you!"

Briar's eyes widened. How did Ashlynn know that it was her? Without any DNA evidence? "I have.. no part in this. Just because Blondie's MirrorCast Show predicts everything? Doesn't mean I'm the killer." Ashlynn nodded her head in a 'yes, you are' gesture.

Briar felt her head, twitching with malfunctioning electronic circuits. How could her own partner not believe what she has to say? It was driving her insane.

"I need DNA from your little weapons. I still don't believe any shit your saying right now, Bri! Not to mention those 8 people were your friends-"

"We're past that. Okay? My brain is drowning in regret, guilt. Like I said before, it's not true. If you don't believe me? Let's go through my weapons stashed in my.. closet and see if there's DNA." Ash was still skeptical about this, she followed behind her in her dorm. She placed the wooden box on her side (Briar) of the bed, opening it up.

Ashlynn's eyes widened, holding a blade.. Who did she assassinate with a blade? Pretty useless weapon if you asked me.

Briar held the knife in her hand, nervousness dripping to her face to her heart. This exact weapon she was holding had DNA on it. There was nothing she could do, literally nothing. She couldn't hide it now, she's fucked.

Ashlynn lifted it up and noticed the dusty fingerprints, which looked which similar to Briar's hands. She had to compare them first, then she knew it.

Ashlynn shook her head rapidly, dropping her shoulders to release her stress. Putting the knife back in the box, and sitting on the edge of the bed. Briar placed the box back in her closet and looked at Ash with a worried expression.

"You're probably still ashamed of.. you know, dating a psychopath? Don't blame you either." The other girl was zoned out, her saying was going in one ear and out the other.

Ashlynn felt like she was going into a huge puddle of blood, not her blood exactly, someone else's.

Even though she would never hurt a fly or human, she was driven to murderousr tendencies, she was so influenced by Briar's terrible behavior that she became her puppy, puppet.

Briar noticed that she was zoned out and tapped her shoulder, this was the second time this made her jump in fear.

"You have to stop doing that." Ashlynn rolled her eyes, but playfully. She smiled and stood up, looking at Briar. "Back to the party now..? I'm kind of- still, scared." Briar frowned, she stood up and cupped her cheeks, titling her head a few inches away from her lips.

"Scared of me right? Don't worry.. I'm not gonna kill you. If you don't end up wrongdoing me." Briar kissed her passionately, still in a good mood. She dragged Ashlynn back to the party and sat her on the couch, looking for Cedar. She noticed her near the kitchen counter and ran to her, whispering. "Where's Cupid's body.."

Cedar furrowed her eyebrows. "In the trashcan, behind the school.. Her body was starting to smell so, so bad." Briar sighed in relief. Filling two cups up with Rum, one cup for her and another one for Ashlynn, even though she told her she doesn't drink it.

"Here, for you." Briar handed her the rum, sighing and drinking it. Ashlynn chugged the whole thing in 2 seconds. "That actually tastes good.. I don't know why I was so hesitant to try it." Ashlynn shrugged, Briar nodded in agreement. "Yeah, I had at least 3 cups and I'm starting to sober down.. No more alcohol for me." Ashlynn giggled and they both did cheers and enjoyed the party.

Few hours later and Ashlynn was in the bathroom, in her dorm room throwing up. Briar kneeled down and soothed her shoulders, pampering her. "Never again.. your a bad influence on me, Briarr.." Ashlynn whining and drunkenly. Wiping her mouth with a towel, staying by the toilet in-case she ends up disgorging again. "Like I said before, you only live once upon a life time." Briar recalled, winking.

[idontplaytrack]

Hii can I request some angsty Amber Appleton with a fluff or smut ending???

What the hell

Amber Appleton x fem! reader

Warnings: angst, some smut, coarse language, fluff, mentions of Amber’s parents’ death

Amber was an optimist. But one afternoon, everything she’s tried so hard to forget comes rushing back to her, causing her to crumble. But hey, Amber was Amber. She always picks herself up.

“Amber?” You called out once you got home, shutting the door and kicking off your shoes, “Honey, I’m home.”

Silence. Very odd. Very worrisome.

Amber was usually curled up on the couch with a book this time of day or sitting at the island with a mug of tea in hand. Instead, you came home to what seemed to be an empty apartment this evening. You looked in the two rooms and she wasn’t there. Your last location was the ensuite bathroom in the bedroom you shared— you thought she’d be in there taking a shower, but also, no.

She didn’t leave you a sticky note, she didn’t text you, she didn’t leave you a voicemail— you didn’t even have one single missed call from her. Hurriedly, you reached into your jean pocket to grab your phone again so you could call her. Amber doesn’t pick up, so you resort to checking her location in this app you had her on. “Where the hell is my wife?” You muttered to yourself while refreshing the app.

Cemetery. She was at a cemetery.

It wasn’t like her to just go anywhere without telling you, and today wasn’t a significant date — you knew when her parents passed on and it wasn’t on today’s date. Now you were contemplating whether to go down there or just wait at home, extremely worried that she has not come online once. ‘What if she needed a ride home?’ You thought to yourself, ‘She must be upset. Otherwise she would’ve responded.’

You went ahead to take a quick shower to freshen up after spending all day at work and outside, turning up the notification volume on your phone just in case she called or texted back. After your shower, you went back to the kitchen and opened the fridge to get a drink. There were a couple Tupperwares inside, filled with food. And, sticky notes on them. You took them out to read them. ‘Just in case I make it home later than you do today. Your favourite.’

‘Dessert’s in this one. Don’t worry about me, just needed some time with my Mom and Dad. Will be home ASAP.’

You put the Tupperware containing dessert back into the fridge and set the one with dinner down on the countertop. Relief washed over you upon reading that, at least now you knew Amber didn’t just up and leave the house. You poured the food into a pan and heated it up before eating. Your mind wanders in the meantime, thinking about the moment Amber told you about her parents and how she used to live with her Mom. On a bus. You didn’t grow up very well-off but was fortunate enough to have a roof over your head where you didn’t have to worry about hiding from others. Despite everything, Amber was a more optimistic and cheerful person than you were. You liked your life now, but it was clear the Amber really, really loved it. You loved her so much and thinks that she deserves the world— and she feels that way about you, doing every little thing you like to make you happy and bring a smile to your face.

You both acknowledged what’s happened but it wasn’t something either of you would bring up in conversations casually for obvious reasons. Your parents were both still around but your relationship with them was extremely complicated and toxic so you haven’t seen them in at least three years. The eventual passing of your parents, you haven’t given it much thought. You were the safest and happiest you’ve been in years living alone with Amber and you wouldn’t change that for the world.

Right before you dug into some dessert, Amber sends you a voice memo.

‘I just left the cemetery. I’m making my way home now. Have you had dinner yet? I’ll see you soon, okay, darling?’

‘Finished my dinner, babe. About to have some dessert now. Can’t wait to cuddle with you.’

‘Me too, my love. Can’t wait to squeeze you.’

You were glad she sent you voice memos, because you could tell almost instantly how she was feeling and she seemed okay. Well, sounded okay.

While you were washing up the dishes, Amber returned home and immediately engulfed you in a hug. “Hi, baby.” You hugged her back tightly, rubbing her back and inhaling the smell of her shampoo.

“How’s your day been?”

“So glad to be home. And that it’s Friday.” You let go of the hug. She smiles, “I’m gonna go take a shower, okay? You wanna join me?”

You already showered, but you weren’t gonna say no to that— that’s for sure.

————

“You’re sure?” You asked, leaning closer to her, your mouth right by her ear.

You feel her nodding her head, humming in agreement. With that, you pressed a trail of kisses across her shoulder, going back up to behind her ear to reach a particular sensitive spot. Amber exhales harshly, her arms around you tightening. The lower your kisses went, the bigger the gap between you and her. She wasn’t happy about it.

Chuckling against her skin, she squirms, whimpering softly. You reached over to turn the water off, repositioning yourself so that you were standing behind her, you reached forward and started to circle her clit with your fingertips.

“What the hell—”

You squeezed her ass next, resuming your gesture to build up her arousal. With her breathing heavy and her barely able to stay standing, you knew she was reaching her breaking point soon enough. It’s been a few weeks since the last time, and she definitely wasn’t subtle about her feelings.

Amber was pretty worked up already, and it definitely wasn’t long before you felt and heard the familiar sounds and sensations from her right before she unravels. But you pulled your fingers out and carried her onto the countertop instead, not wanting either of you to fall. She holds herself up with her palms, head thrown back, mouth hanging open while she obediently kept her legs open for you. While you, you diligently curled your fingers upwards each time you entered her to stroke her g-spot. It was making her go crazy for you— noises falling from her mouth in a never ending stream, the giggling, the heavy breathing, how she was twitching beneath and clenching around you. And fuck, how she was basically riding your hand as you worked her over.

Reconnecting your lips with hers was pretty much what did it for her. The closeness. She finally unravels, coating your fingers and hand with her juices. You slow down and pulled them out after a few moments. “Was that good?” You grinned.

“Good? You’ve got to be kidding me, honey. You’re amazing.” Amber scoffs, “Ugh, I love you so much.”

You chuckled lowly, “Oh, yeah? Show me.”

“If you want that, that’s what I’m gonna give you.” She mirrors your grin, pressing another kiss to your lips. “Do you?”

“Just fuck me already.”

“Oh, that’s so hot.” She purrs into your ears, “Very eager, hm?”

🏷️ Tag list:

@ashecampos @auliisflower @cheesysoup-arlo @frogs00 @reneeswif3 @ludoesartnstuffs @pda128

💭A/N: This one was very short, I’m sorry. I just didn’t know how to end it🥲

[gryfflepuffinthetardis]

Valentía: Extreme Aggressor

Season One Masterlist

Previous: Prologue Part Two

Next: Compulsion

Summary: SSA Jason Gideon is called in from his six month medical leave to return to the BAU to go to Seattle to profile a rapist and killer and save his latest victim after she goes missing.

Warning: Typical Criminal Minds warnings; UnSub is a rapist-killer; References to rape; References to murder; Descriptions of PTSD; Mention of real-life serial killer, Countess Elizabeth Báthory; "Supernatural" References

“PTSD: It’s not the person refusing to let go of the past, but the past refusing to let go of the person.”

September 21, 2005

"Zoe Valdez", as she was known around the office, wrote in her crime book, writing her own profile on the killer of Countess Elizabeth Báthory when her phone rang.

"Hello..." She mumbled.

"We have a case and we need Gideon."

Zoe fell off the couch, "Gideon's coming back?" She grinned.

"Don't worry, he knows how you want to be known around the office."

——————————————————————————————————

BAU — Behavior Analysis Training

FBI, Quantico, Virginia

One of the founders of the BAU, Jason Gideon, six months after leaving the BAU on medical leave, was teaching a class of those who may be FBI agents one day.

He clicked through the faces of the victims of the recently caught Footpath Killer (as of six and a half months ago), the victims were always the least known part of serial killer stories

"Anyone recognize these faces?" Gideon asked.

"Victims of the Footpath Killer." A student answered.

"That's what Virginia newspapers are calling him. We refer to him as the Unknown Subject or Unsub. I told Virginia P.D. they're looking for a white male in his twenties, who owns an American made truck in disrepair. Works a menial job. I told 'em, when you find him, don't be surprised if he speaks with a severe stutter." He explained.

A girl raised her pencil-holding hand and voiced, "Not to sound skeptical, but come on... a stutter?"

"Where'd the murders occur?" Gideon asked and realization slowly occurred to the girl as he continued to explain what a young genius he had known since birth had suggested, "Hiking paths. Isolated. If I'm a killer who has to use an immediate application of overpowering force, even out in the middle of nowhere, I lack confidence. I can't charm them into my car like Ted Bundy did. I can't because I am ashamed of something."

Gideon's serial killer class was interrupted when a quite pretty twenty-three-year-old boy with gelled down brown hair and brown-hazel eyes, held up a case file and tapped it. Gideon's protege, Doctor Spencer Reid, the smartest guy Gideon had ever met.

"Excuse me." He told the class and walked out with Spencer, "They're calling him the 'Seattle Strangler'. Four victims in four months. He keeps 'em alive seven days. The handle serves as a crank." He and Gideon looked at a photo of a recent victim.

"Allowing him to control the rate of suffocation." Gideon deduced.

"To prolong it?" Spencer asked.

"To enjoy it." Gideon corrected, "Seattle's hit a wall?"

"Physical evidence is nonexistent. There are no tangible leads."

"And another girl is missing." Gideon said and he entered an office, looking over the case, "I looked the case file over. I'll get some thoughts to you ASAP."

Aaron "Hotch" Hotchner and Derek Morgan entered with the former saying, "you're gonna be with us in Seattle ASAP."

Gideon looked up at the man who now held his former job title of Unit Chief and he took off his glasses.

Morgan held out a picture of a young girl with red hair, "Twenty-two-year-old Heather Woodland."

"Before she left for lunch, she downloaded an email with a time-delayed virus attached. The killer's virus wiped her hard drive and left this on the screen." Hotch said and handed Gideon a printed screenshot with a familiar messy colored hand-writing at the bottom.

"For heaven's sake catch me before I kill more. I cannot control myself."

 The hand written note scrawled out the words: William Heirens (Lipstick Killer) December 10, 1945, the second victim, Frances Brown's apartment.

"Uh, Valdez, the new girl that Hotch hired wrote that." Spencer said, gesturing.

Gideon looked at Hotch and knew that meant Zoe.

"He never keeps them for more than seven days which means we have fewer than thirty-six hours to find her." Hotch said.

"They want you back in the saddle. You ready?" Morgan asked.

"Looks like medical leave's over, boss." Spencer said.

"They sure, they want me? You guys have Alexander and… Valdez." He, like Hotch, knew Zoe’s real identity as Alexander’s daughter, having been the second person to hold her after the stressful event that was her birth.

They all looked at him, they all knew, Alexander... well, he was about as crazy as the UnSubs they caught.

"The order came from the director." Hotch nodded

Gideon turned, dramatically, "Then we'd better get started."

——————————————————————————————————

Gideon got out of the car with his go bag and walked towards the BAU jet as Alexander, a forty-year-old man with messy brown hair, stuck his head out, "Ah, Jason. Welcome back."

"Alexander."

Gideon entered the jet to see what he should've expected, Zoe Noble-Valdez had notes all around her and stuck on the walls and there were several stuck in her hair that was streaked with light green and headphones over her ears.

"Of course." Gideon said as Zoe wrote rapidly, having always been an over-achiever due to her brilliant mind and constant need to be doing something especially in the past four years.

Spencer, Morgan, and Hotch got on the jet.

"Jason Gideon, meet our newest recruit, Doctor Zoe Valdez." It hurt the father, only referring to his daughter by his late girlfriend's name but this was what Zoe wanted.

"Zoe." Spencer said, passing her and pulling her headphones off, letting the distant sound of her audiobook be heard.

Zoe looked up, pausing the audiobook and smiled, widely.

"SSA Jason Gideon, nice to see you again." She said, acting as if he hadn't known her since before she was born, as if he hadn't mentored and worked with her mother.

"You know, Agent Valdez." He said, playing along and shaking her hand.

"You two have already met?" Morgan asked.

Zoe looked at him, keeping her cool and said, "Yes." She sat back down, "That is technically true."

Truth was Gideon was like a second father to her along with retired Agent David Rossi but Gideon had more of a healthy idea on what's appropriate to read to a three-year-old child before bed rather than a grisly unsolved crime case as Rossi had gotten bored of children books with no twists or plots and Zoe had annoyed Alexander into doing it.

"How did you get all this done? We were gone for half an hour." Morgan said.

"It's not my fault that you're ordinary and your thoughts go at a normal speed." She smiled.

"How's she doing so far?" Gideon asked Hotch and Alexander.

"Pretty good for a nineteen-year-old." Hotch admitted, "Other than her being, reckless, rebellious, a little violent, refuses to oblige the dress code. Pretty much everything I predicted.”

"Pretty good? My angel is the best agent since her mother." Alexander whispered, proudly as he watched Zoe and Spencer compare notes.

——————————————————————————————————

"His first victim was twenty-six-year-old Melissa Kirsh." Zoe said, "Stab wounds. Strangulation."

 “Wait, wait. Back up. Back up.” Morgan interrupted the young medical doctor.

Holding his hands out in front of him, stopping her from continuing.

“He stabbed her, and then he strangled her to finish her off?”

“No.” Zoe deadpanned.

“Other way around.” Gideon corrected and he turned to his two proteges, "Why do you think he started using the belt with the second murder?"

“Strangulation with your bare hands is not as easy as one would believe.” Zoe said, "About four-point-four to eleven pounds of pressure."

"He tried, probably realized it took too long..." Spencer speculated.

"So he stabbed her instead." Morgan finished.

“And realized it would be hours cleaning up the blood.” Hotch said.

“Next time, our boy’s got a method—the belt.” Derek said.

“He’s learning, perfecting his scenario. He's learning from his mistakes like the Reaper," Hotch shifted and Alexander flinched, giving Zoe an unreadable glance, "did when his call to 911 actually led to his only surviving victim's survival.” Zoe said, “becoming a better killer. 

——————————————————————————————————

They arrived at the FBI Northwest Field Office in Seattle, Washington. They were held back due to Zoe having more weapons than most would think possible on her person at the security check.

"What's wrong with you? Why do you have so many weapons?" Morgan asked as Zoe finally made it through and looked at him.

He never stands with his back to a window and was reholstering most of her weapons. She looked at Morgan with a guarded look in her eyes, "My dad was an overprotective and paranoid guy." She said, vaguely. She never said much about her parents but plenty about her terrifying family which seemed to mostly consist of badass women and valued a variety of Zoe's attributes and feminism.

Zoe walked with Morgan and Spencer when Morgan nudged the older genius, "He never stands with his back to the window. When I was between him and a doorway, he asked me to move."

"That's hyper vigilance. It's not uncommon in post traumatic stress disorder.

"Also paranoia; trust issues; vivid flashbacks; intrusive thoughts and/or images; nightmares; intense distress; physical sensations such as pain, sweating, nausea, or trembling. There's also categories of the different types of symptoms and the symptoms those symptoms have."

"I know what symptoms PTSD causes, Zoe!" Morgan snapped.

"I don't think you do. You most likely had been ignoring yours for years, more than a decade I bet." She said, blankly.

"Don't profile me." Morgan pointed a finger at Zoe who looked at him with a bored deadpan expression. "Just how much disorder are we talking about?"

"Morgan, it's been six months." Hotch said, "Everything's okay."

"Yeah, fuck off, Morgan." Zoe said.

"That's not what I said." Hotch said.

"Essentially it was." She said and Hotch just continued onwards with Spencer, being painfully awkward. “Just because you ignored the trauma your past caused you, doesn't mean Gideon will heal just as quickly." Zoe said.

Morgan was trained not to react when surprised but being off-guard, his eyes widened only briefly before his face went back to neutral but with panic, confusion, and mild curiosity in his eyes. "What trauma?" He asked, defensively which only further confirmed her profile she had unwilling been making over the past six months.

"You're guarded, unwilling to trust that people’ve got your back as well as you've got yours, and protective. You grew up with an absent father and given that he was a officer too, it's likely he was killed in the line of duty. Your compassion for the wounded tells me that maybe you witnessed it. And I'm sorry for that. You were then betrayed by a father issue not too long after." Zoe said and she noticed Morgan stiffen in fear and anger for said father figure and the idea of this nineteen-year-old that he wasn't sure if he fully trusted yet finding out, "I can't quite and am unwilling to deduce the specifics because that's personal and I am already overstepping, I'm aware of that. But you got out and you moved on to make sure that as few people as possible experience what you did." Zoe said with absolutely no effort whatsoever. "Not many people are that strong. They let it control their life. Not you though. Not only did you get out but you're making a difference."

She gave him a hesitant, small smile that only lasted about a second or two with a semi-warmth to it which was more than he had gotten from her in six months and then she walked after Hotch and Spencer.

Alexander walked past Morgan, pretending to have not heard anything with a small, proud smile on his face for his daughter's kindness, even if she tried to hide it. 

Hotch introduced the team as they walked, "This is special agent Gideon, special agent Morgan, our expert on obsessional crimes, special agent Noble, special agent Reid..."

"Doctor Reid." Gideon and Alexander corrected.

Doctor Reid, our expert on well, everything, and special agent—Doctor Valdez, our expert on missing persons and medical knowledge and pretty much everything Reid may not know. And after two years busting my butt in this office, I hope you all remember me."

And people laughed. His systems must've malfunctioned.

They looked at the murder board and Gideon observed, "He's willing to travel with the body."

"Then he drives a vehicle capable of concealing one." Hotch added.

"One in seven-point-four drivers in Seattle own an SUV." Spencer reasoned.

"Explorer with tinted windows." Morgan suggested.

"Explorers rate higher with women." 

But how do we know it's his car?" Morgan asked.

 Ted Bundy drove a VW Bug."

"A what?" Zoe asked. She was more of a motorcycle girl than a car girl. She had a  Marine Turbine Technology Y2K motorcycle that she had modified, it went above the average speed of one and was silent due to her modifications, she rode it when they were racing to an UnSub’s location and was usually able to stall or even take down the UnSub.

"Volswagen Beetle." Alexander clarified as Zoe, despite being such a tomboy she considered herself to count as a boy in the boy's club of the team (apart from J.J. and Penelope Garcia, the latter rarely ever traveling with them).

"What about a Jeep Cherokee?

"Jeeps are more masculine." Reid said.

"Yeah, doesn't mean he has one." Zoe said.

"We all know how an unsub feels about asserting his masculinity." Alexander said.

"That's a good point." Zoe muttered before turning to the closest detective, "Most male rapists are insecure about their masculinity and feel the need to assert their dominance as men over women—they also tend to have insulting and distorted views on women—or feel the need to be reassured in their masculinity by raping women, because men are the worst, meaning their insecurities are often present in their behavior."

Zoe raised her eyebrows as if asking anyone to question her but no one dared do so.

"When did the bureau become involved in the case?" Hotch said, ignoring her.

"After the fourth body." The ASAC (Assistant Special Agent in Charge) said.

"Sondra Watts, taken August sixth, killed and dumped August thirteenth." Zoe said, humanizing the deceased victim as she tended to do.

"He dumped that one out of state.”

"On purpose." Hotch added.

"If so, knowledge of law enforcement does suggest a criminal record.”

"Or that he watches television."

"Television usually is widely inaccurate and is based on assumptions and beliefs caused by television. He'd have slipped up by now. Maybe he's law enforcement..." Zoe mused.

"Are you accusing the local police?" Someone asked accusingly.

"There are other law enforcement jobs than police, you know." Alexander snapped, barely restraining himself. How dare someone speak to his little girl like that.

Zoe gave her father a side look and rolled her eyes. "Yeah, or maybe he's associated with law enforcement but not necessarily law enforcement." Zoe suggested.

"Like a prison guard or something." Alexander said with a bitter undertone.

"May I?" Morgan asked.

"So you wanna see our suspect list?" The ASAC asked.

"No, we won't look at a suspect list until after we come up with a profile. It keeps our perspective unbiased." Hotch explained.

"When do we sit down with your task force?" Gideon asked.

"Four o'clock." Another agent said.

“An accurate profile by four o'clock today?" Morgan asked.

"That's not a problem." Gideon said and walked to another board.

"Agent Gideon, where would you like to start?" Hotch asked, still used to taking orders from him.

Gideon pointed at a picture, "Let's start at the site of the last murder."

"Do we have a list of those Heather Woodland is related and close to?" Zoe asked.

"Yes," A detective said and produced a list.

Zoe looked over it, "David Woodland, who's that?"

"Her brother. He was the one to report her missing. He's at her house, watching her dog."

"Alright, I'm going to go interview the brother." Zoe declared.

"Uh, not alone you're not!" Alexander scolded, with more emotion than a supervisor would to a new agent. Zoe turned around and gave him a deadpan look that only someone who knew her longer than six months could detect the hint of a glare she was giving him like, don't fucking treat me like a child. I'm a big girl, Dad. “You’re around the same age as the victims.”

“I can take care of myself.” Zoe said, stubbornly.

"Reid and I'll go with her." Hotch said before Alexander did any more damage to Zoe's request that their relationship as father and daughter remain secret for now.

"As long as he doesn't drive." Zoe said, jabbing her thumb at Spencer.

"Deal." Hotch agreed in his usual deadpan, walking past her.

"What's wrong with the way I drive?" Spencer asked, genuinely.

Morgan made a sound between a scoff of disbelief and a snort of amusement.

"Because you drive like a grandma." Zoe quipped, "Come on, Boy Genius."

——————————————————————————————————

At the dumping site, Gideon walked off, observing the crime scene as an officer asked the group, consisting of other officers, Morgan, and Alexander, "so that's Gideon? The Gideon. The one who caught that guy, Adrian Baal, in Boston.

"Yep. That's him. But catching him cost us six agents." Morgan said.

"Gideon, he... he's always been haunted by those he can't save so that hit him pretty hard." Alexander said.

"You co-founded the BAU with him, right?"

"Yeah."

"You, him, and that famous writer, Rossi, and someone else. A woman."

"Zelena." Alexander said, "yeah."

"Didn't you marry her or something?"

"No. No. We never married. Never had the chance. I fell in love with her immediately... when she judo-flipped me. then straddled me, and pressed her forearm against my throat. She took a while, given my... my Bipolar and ADHD but she did and in January of 1985, we learned she was pregnant, then found out it was twins—both girls..." 

For a lot of fathers, the day of their child's birth are the happiest days of their lives, even better than their wedding days. Alexander's father didn't see that for Alexander or his younger sister. Alexander's oldest twin daughter, Zarah had been born normally but then... the job really did wreak havoc on his life and Zoe had been born with a number of complications from the circumstances to her health.

"How are they?"

"Oh, they're-they're good.” Alexander mumbled, knowing only where one was as he walked out where Gideon was.

"Twenty-two-year-old Anne Cushing was found right here. Nails clipped just like the others." Alexander said and handed Gideon a picture, "He wants them to fight back."

"But not enough to hurt him. And he left the belt around her neck." Gideon stated as Morgan joined them, "He's probably in his early twenties."

"What's your reasoning?" Morgan asked. 

"Youthful arrogance." Was all Gideon said as according to Zoe applied to Morgan.

Morgan sighed, "He clothed the body before dumping it." 

"That's a sign of remorse." Gideon said.

"It's not consistent. Look where we are. His opinion of women is pretty clear, don't you think?" Morgan opinionized.

"They're disposable." Alexander scowled, every time the killer's M.O. was even vaguely associated with his girls—he couldn't help but fear and imagine that they were the next victim. Zoe was technically half-Caucasian-Scottish but also half Hispanic but that didn't matter to a single parent of two girls both with childhoods filled with trauma and danger.

"Why show remorse by taking the time to dress her but then dump her here?" Morgan asked.

——————————————————————————————————

Hotch, Spencer, and Zoe were in Heather Woodland's house, let in by her brother, David.

Heather's labrador barked up at Spencer who flinched back.

"Sandy, no, no, no." David scolded the dog and apologized to the agents, "I'm so sorry." 

"No, it's okay. It's what we call the Reid effect. Happens with children, too." Zoe snarked, Spencer gave her an unamused look.

"I'm Agent Hotchner. This is special agent Doctor Reid and this is special agent Valdez." 

"You both look too young to have gone to medical school." David noted.

"They're PhD's. Three of them." Spencer replied.

"Are you a genius or something?" David asked. 

"I-I-I don't believe that intelligence can be accurately quantified—but I do have an I.Q. of one-eighty-seven and an eidetic memory and can read twenty thousand words per minute." Spencer said and David stared at him, “Yes, I'm a genius.”

"Actually, I'm the medical doctor." Zoe said as she wandered around the room.

"Are you a genius too?" David asked and triggered Zoe to go on an absent-minded unintentional brag.

"Well, I never took an official IQ test because I believe tests are bias towards only two kinds of intelligences but it's been estimated to be quite high as I have an auditory memory, I finished high school when I was sixteen, could've done so when I was nine or ten but... circumstances. I was seventeen when I finished medical school." Zoe babbled.

"Seventeen?"

"Yeah, I started getting college degrees when I was six, technically graduated from Princeton, Yale, CalTech, MIT, etc. before age twelve."

"How many degrees do you have?"

"Twenty-four."

"How old are you?"

"Nineteen. I turn twenty next month.”

“But—how-how…”

“I was fully able to comprehend basic language and things like death before six months old, I was fluent in Spanish and English by twelve months. I started taking college classes along with normal kindergarten classes at age five..."

"Zoe, you're doing it again." Hotch interrupted.

"Oh." Zoe blushed, "I'm sorry. I'm ADHD and Cyclothymic, mildly Bipolar, I tend to get distracted and it's a bit difficult to filter my constant thoughts. Uh, May I?" Zoe asked, referring to Sandy.

"Oh, yeah." David nodded.

Zoe crouched down and petted the dog, "You know my family back in Mexico breed Xoloitzcuintle dogs.”

“Is that a breed?”

“Yeah, they’re the national dog of Mexico.”

“I thought that was chihuahuas.”

Zoe ignored this comment. “Xoloitzcuintle are rare nowadays and Mexicans believe they have spiritual abilities.” She went back to petting Sandy, “Sandy, you get a lot of attention, don't you?"

"Yeah, Heather loves this dog. I feed her when Heather's away. Usually, she's fine, but lately, she won't eat. It's almost like she can sense something's wrong." David worried.

"Not sense. Smell. Our apocrine sweat gland releases secretions in response to emotional stress." Spencer explained.

"Uh, translation: Sandy's worried because she knows you are." Zoe said, standing up.

"David, does your sister drive a Datsun Z?" Spencer asked.

"No, but she's in the market for one. How'd you know?" David asked and Spencer showed him a magazine displaying that car, then Sandy barked, "Come on, Sandy." He took Sandy out.

Hotch and Zoe joined Spencer, "There's an immediate relationship established between a buyer and a seller, a level of trust. If I want to coax a young woman into my car..."  Spencer theorized.

"Offer her a test drive." Zoe finished, "That's really smart, Spence."

——————————————————————————————————

Back at the field office, Morgan was pacing, Spencer and Zoe were spinning in their swivel chairs as Zoe sucked on an apple-flavored dum-dum.

"Okay, then how about the fact that on one hand, we have paranoid psychosis... but the autopsy protocol says what?" Morgan asked.

"Adhesive residue shows he put layer after layer of duct tape over his victims' eyes." Zoe recited after pulling the dum-dum out of her mouth with a pop!

"He knows he wants to kill them, but he still covers their eyes. He doesn't want 'em looking at him, apparently. Okay, but then he takes the body and dumps it right out in the open, murder weapon nearby." 

Zoe turned to Gideon, noting his tense posture and being ADHD, she had hypersensitivity, also known as being a "highly sensitive person" (HSP), which meant she was more empathetic than the average neurotypical person and being raised around profilers plus her own studying and intuition meant she could pick up on what others didn’t and completely missed what everyone else did.

"Not the M.O. of a paranoid convinced he's being watched or surveilled." Spencer said. Twelve minutes in and we're already foreshadowing.

"Paranoid psychosis, but behavior that's not paranoid." Morgan argued.

"Maybe he's schizophrenic." Hotch asked.

"Gideon?" Zoe asked but got no response, "Gideon?"

"Maybe we just don't have enough for a complete profile." Morgan said, pessimistically, as always.

"We have enough to narrow our list of suspects." Hotch said. "You know, we're looking at less than twelve hours to find this woman. We don't know exactly what..."

"Hotch, we don't know anything!" Morgan shouted.

"Gideon!?" Zoe said, loudly.

"All right, enough." Gideon said, quieting the room and Zoe put the dum-dum back into her mouth and started to half spin her chair before using her feet to make her go the other way, never fully spinning around. "Let's tell them we're ready." Then he walked off as Alexander entered with the coffee (and in Zoe's case highly caffeinated Mexican hot chocolate) orders.

"We're ready?" Morgan asked in disbelief as Alexander placed the cup holder tray on the table—Zoe and Spencer taking their respective cups at once—and Alexander followed Hotch after Gideon.

Zoe took a big sip of her hot chocolate and then leaned onto the table to write down a copy of the profile they never really discussed.

"Reid. Zoe. You're good with this? We've got a woman who's only got a few hours left to live, an incomplete profile, and a unit chief on the verge of a nervous breakdown." Morgan complained.

Gideon came in and picked up something as he said the same thing as Zoe, "They don't call them nervous breakdowns anymore."

"Grandma Morgan." Zoe had added, snarkily as Gideon left.

"It's called a major depressive episode." Spencer said, getting back to writing.

"I know, Reid." Morgan snapped.

"Are you sure? Do you know what year it is, gramps?"

"Okay." Morgan said and walked out.

Zoe’s phone rang and she saw her caller ID, reading, MD.

She brought the phone up to her ear as she spoke to her friend, “Hey. MD, seriously, I’m fine. We’re just about to deliver the profile. Well, you’re not a profiler. I know. I know, you are. Alright, I’ll call you back later.”

——————————————————————————————————

Gideon stood in the middle of the room before getting to the profile.

"The unidentified subject is white and in his late twenties. He's someone you wouldn't notice at first. He's someone who'd blend into any crowd. The violent nature of the crime suggests a previous criminal record—petty crimes. Maybe auto theft. We've classified him as an organized killer—careful. Psychopathic as opposed to psychotic. He follows the news, has good hygiene. He's smart. 'Cause he's smart, the only physical evidence you'll find is what he wants you to find. He's mobile, car in good condition. Our guess—Jeep Cherokee, tinted windows. The murders have all involved rapes. But rape without penetration is a form of piquerism, and that tells us he's sexually inadequate. Psychiatric evaluations will show a history of paranoia stemming from a childhood trauma—death of a parent or family member. And now he feels persecuted and watched. Murder gives him a sense of power. Organized killers have a fascination with law enforcement. They will inject themselves into the investigation. They will even come forward as witnesses to see just how much the police really know. That makes them feel powerful, in control. Which is why I also think—in fact, I know—you have already interviewed him."

——————————————————————————————————

They had an officer with the Seattle FBI agent lure a suspect named Richard Slessman into a nearby house where they tackled him to the ground.

Slessman looked like a near-incompetent monster hunter with a lame catchphrase that was just their first name as a verb that would get bitten by a werewolf with dead eyes. As in Slessman had dead eyes, not the werewolf.

They searched Slessman's house as others spoke to the woman who had opened the door for the previously mentioned agent.

"There's no sign of Heather here." Zoe said after jumping over the banister to make room for the agents 

"We can arrest him with probable cause, but we won't be able to hold him. Slessman's been at the top of the suspect list." Spencer added.

“Is that the mother?" Gideon asked.

The agent came up to them, "Grandmother. The mother died in a fire when he was thirteen."

“Probably not the only fire in his childhood.” Zoe said.

She looked to Spencer and Zoe, "Hi, Agent Elle Greenaway." 

"Special Agent Doctor Zoe Valdez. I prefer Zoe." Zoe shook her hand while Spencer awkwardly and clumsily shifted past them, trying to not make any physical contact with them. "That's Special Agent Doctor Spencer Reid. He doesn't understand social interactions while I understand them a little better but despise them."

Elle chuckled and they walked with Gideon and Spencer as 

“Before his Son of Sam murders, David Berkowitz set a multitude of fires.” Spencer said.

"Exactly how much is a multitude?" Morgan asked.

"A multitude." Zoe sassed. Morgan wasn't amused. "A multitude is a multitude many. More than one."

"Zoe's the second snarker on the team. The first is Alexander Noble." Gideon told Elle.

"According to his diary, one thousand-four hundred and..." He trailed off, trying to search through his memories.

"Eighty-eight." Elle and Zoe said.

"Luring him out was your idea, right? Greenway? " Gideon asked.

"Elle. I don't send a SWAT team into a house with children." Elle stated.

"Hotch says your background is in sex offender cases. What can you tell us?" Gideon asked. 

"The last four murders show he's an anger-excitation rapist. He'll keep a victim for a couple of days. He probably records or videotapes them so that he can keep reliving the fantasy."

Zoe balled her fists, her fingernails digging in her palms. 

"You ok with Hotch being in on the interview?" Gideon continued.

"I'd like him to lead, actually." Elle said.

"Fine. But hold off.  Slessman's done time, and he knows the process. And all you will get now is a demand for a lawyer." Gideon said. "Hotch, let's check the garage, then show me what you got.

"Next time, show a little leg." Morgan flirted.

"Spence, you wanna go check out... not here." Zoe said, deadpan.

"Yeah, that-that sounds like a good idea." Spencer said and they went up the stairs at a quicker pace than Morgan and Elle and went to a room at the end of the hall.

"Morgan, the only time you're gonna see a little leg from me is when I'm about to kick your ass." Elle said.

"I still teach hand-to-hand over at Quantico if you need a little brush-up training."

"Yeah, because I passed up so I can humiliate him when Hotch asks me to join. He loses every time." Zoe called to them, much to Morgan's chagrin. "It infuriates him to be beaten by someone who's only been in the FBI less than two years and has only been at the BAU six months and is thirteen years his junior."

"Don't you have a room to search, Doogie Howser?" Morgan asked, irritably.

"Okay, first off, I'm a woman. You'll need to find a girl name, Chicago. Second of all, Doogie Howser is improbable, the youngest people to graduate from medical school were the same age. Balamurali Ambati and me. They'd never have a ten-year-old start medical school, even if he was the legen-dary Neil Patrick Harris."

Spencer appeared next to Zoe to add his criticism to the legendary Neil Patrick Harris' breakout role. "Even if he knew all the information since his emotional development would be taken into account."

"You two ruin everything." Morgan said.

"Elle, you think you're ready for it?" Zoe asked, "the job. You'd have to deal with all of us all day. And we got Garcia who flirts with Morgan even less shame than him."

Zoe moved back into the room with Spencer before Elle strode over, "Zoe, wait. You're the newest member, also somehow only nineteen. The cut off is twenty-three."

"Well, for geniuses, we were given exceptions. I joined the BAU when I was twenty-two." Spencer said.

"I trained with Maze Valdez, no relation,” Absolutely relation, “for a year and a half before..." Her mouth was about to form one word but then she changed, "The BAU requested my transfer. But I'm fully qualified." Like most people Elle assumed Zoe had said that due to her age and not her blood relation to two of the founding members of the BAU.

"Zoe, seriously I want that opening at BAU. You got any advice?" Elle asked.

"My advice? Just trust your instincts. Be intuitive. Be empathetic. Restrain your impulses. At all times, try to understand the Unsub's point of view, including their backstory, their mentality, their family, everything. Put yourself in their shoes as horrible as it is. Be perceptive. Be observant. But most of all, trust your instincts. They're telling you something for a reason."

——————————————————————————————————

Elle found Spencer, Gideon, Zoe, and Alexander upstairs; Alexander seemed to be fussing at Zoe about something in a manner that Elle hadn't experienced in twenty years; Spencer in thirteen.

Zoe irritably snatched a bottle of water and reached into her side satchel that carried her ADHD fidget toys and her antidepressant, ADHD, PTSD, and Cyclothymia (a combination of a variety of pills) pill bottles and she took out only a few of the bottles to take and washed them down with the water.

Elle didn't comment on this as she had figured Zoe had some kind of mental illness due to her constant fidgeting, oral fixation, distractibility, hyperactivity, forgetfulness, and her bag of fidget toys.

Then she spotted a game on a wooden platform with white and black markers.

"What kind of game is it?" Elle asked.

"In China, it's called wei-chi. Here we call it 'Go'." Spencer said.

"It's considered to be the most difficult board game ever conceived." Zoe said, having mastered the game by two and a half.

"Chairman Mao required his generals to learn it." Gideon said.

"It also looks like he's playing himself." Zoe observed, kneeling down beside the game board, nearly knocking it over with her knees, making Spencer's hand fly near it before pulling them back. "Sorry."

"How can you tell?" Elle asked.

Zoe gently pushed the board into a spin, revealing that it was on some kind of rotator wheel.

"My uncle taught me how to build these, I've got a few at home." Zoe said.

"I will come back to that later." Spencer promised her, "This might provide an advantage, actually."

"Yeah, Go is considered to be a particularly psychologically revealing game. There are profiles for every player—the conservative point counter, the aggressor, the finesser. And with what little psychological research that has been done of 'Go' against other games. In Go the large search tree, knowledge, and pattern recognition is more important than in other strategy games, it's theorized playing this reduces the risk of Alzheimer's and dementia and I can already tell I'm doing the off-topic thing again..." Zoe said and saw Elle looking at her, wondering how she knew so much about the psychology of a game Elle didn't know existed five minutes ago, "My, uh, one of my cousins introduced me to it when I was a year and a half." She pursed her lips together, recalling a brief memory where her thirteen-year-old cousin had been pinned to the floor by mental institution security officers and forced into a straightjacket in Las Vegas when she was about three years old.

"A year and a half?" Elle asked, certain she must've heard that wrong.

"What kind of player is Slessman?" Hotch asked, noting Zoe's discomfort which told him it was either one of her criminal relatives or mentally ill relatives.

Zoe stood back up once again, carelessly, bumping against the board game, making the markers jump but no real damage done. "Sorry. Sorry. Need a few angles." Zoe tilted her head as visualizations only she could see formed rather cinematically, putting mental notes on the different players. Her eyes darted up to meet Alexander's first, before darting to the next person's eyes and so on, "Extreme aggressor."

——————————————————————————————————

Elle, Gideon, and Zoe walked into the boy room where Morgan was with the laptop.

"Oh, fake password?" Zoe asked.

"How'd you guess?" Morgan asked.

"Garcia's not the only hacker, I just prefer the field." Zoe shrugged.

"Well, ladies first." Morgan said, pulling the chair out.

"Well, what are you waiting for?" She sassed. Spencer snorted in amusement behind them as Zoe sat down, flipping her streaked dark brown hair.

"Well, then what's the number six at the bottom of the screen?" Elle asked.

"Number of password attempts before the program wipes the hard drive." Morgan said.

"There could be an email, or a journal in the computer, something that tells us where Heather is." Elle said and looked at Zoe, "Do you think you can break in?" 

"In six tries?" Morgan asked, skeptically.

Zoe tilted her head back and looked at Elle and the others upside down, Zoe asked, "I don't know if there's any other viruses on the laptop if I try to hack into it which would wipe the hard drive.”

"Try again. Fail again. Fail better." Gideon quoted and Elle, Zoe, and Morgan just stared at him.

"Samuel Beckett." Spencer recalled.

"Try not. Do or do not." Morgan said.

Gideon looked at him confused before Spencer turned to him, "Yoda."

Zoe was hesitant; while she may be reckless when it came to her own safety; she was so filled with self-loathing and utter conviction that people wouldn't care all that much if she died; but they only had six tries. 

"I'm all for taking risks but not when it holds the life of another person. Zoe Valdez." Zoe sassed. "The password likely means something to him. Our best chance is to either get it out of him or to profile him.”

Gideon turned around and spotted a familiar book spine on the shelf that was written in 1984, he pulled it out and Spencer read the title aloud, "Journal of Applied Criminal Psychology..." Zoe cut herself off from her conversation with Morgan when she heard Spencer say the title and turned to look at them, "Co-written by David Rossi, Jason Gideon, Zelena Valdez, and Alexander Noble."

Her eyes landed on the book and Zoe stood up from the chair and made her way over, Gideon glanced at her as he started to flip through the book before it landed on a newspaper article about the incident from six months ago.

Shrapnel Blast Kills Six

"I wanna talk to him." Gideon said and walked off.

Zoe took the book and a slip of paper fell out, landing on the floor Zoe picked it up and read it. Her eyes grew dark and she stormed out of the room, slamming it into Alexander's chest. He looked at it and his eyes also grew dark.

Zelena V.

Alexander N.

Zarah N. V.

Xiomara N. V. 

Zelena and Zarah were crossed out.

——————————————————————————————————

Gideon approached Slessman and placed the book down on the makeshift interrogation table which was really the cheap dinner table.

"You read my paper. Learn anything?" Zoe and Alexander ran down the stairs, Gideon turned and held out a hand out, making Zoe stop and turned back to Slessman, "go on."

"Heirens said a man living inside of his head was the one who committed the murders. You said he was lying, that there'd never been an actual case of multiple personalities." Gideon gestured for Alexander and Zoe to come in and Slessman's eyebrow raised when he saw them, his eye glued to Zoe.

"I assume you know who these two are?"

"Alexander Noble, co-founder of the BAU in 1983, you were nineteen. Same age as your daughter here, Xiomara Noble-Valdez."

"No one calls me Xiomara and don't call me Noble-Valdez either."

"What? You rather go by the surname of the mother you killed?"

"What did my mother say on Heirenz?" Zoe asked.

"She disagreed. Saying that it was more than likely many serial killers had multiple personality disorder. What do you think, Xiomara?"

"About what?"

"Heirens' diagnosis."

Zoe sat back in her seat, sensing the test and she looked down as she shifted through her thoughts

"Nothing was ever confirmed but it's been theorized that he could've had some sort of personality and/or schizophrenic disorder. Hysterical Personality Disorder. Dissociative Personality disorder. Dissociative Schizophrenic. His mother however, had hysterical paralysis and conversion disorder, formerly known as hysteria, is genetic so most likely HPD but still possible he had DID." Zoe shrugged.

"You have an academic interest in dissociative identity disorder, or you just planning your defense?" Gideon asked and Slessman just chuckled/scoffed. Gideon pulled out the article he found in the book and placed it in front of him. "You a fan of Adrian Baal's work?"

"No. I'm a fan of yours." Slessman said. "You know they never give you the real facts about CPR that outside of a hospital, it's only effective seven percent of the time." Slessman mocked but Zoe had already found that he was arrogant in his intelligence but he wasn't as smart as he thought he was. "Your friend had a ninety-three certainty of dying, but you kept trying even after you'd broken his ribs, even after his blood was all over your hands.

"How are you still alive? Are you learning medical knowledge off of a sitcom or the back of a cereal box? That was deeply inaccurate." Zoe deadpanned. "So you can't figure out how to get into the laptop to Google it either?"

A flash of irritation flickered upon Slessman's face and leaned forwards on the table, "I've heard about you. The daughter of the Scottish FBI agent, never afraid, always mocking others. I bet you're afraid deep down."

Zoe leaned on the table too until her nose was only an inch from Slessman's nose and she spoke in a soft but rather tauntingly intimidating tone but also so a certain nearby agent wouldn't hear, "I once looked a well-known serial killer who derived sexual pleasure off of the fear he inflicted up all twenty victims before brutally killing them, likely he couldn't perform otherwise. I stared him right in the eyes and I knew I was the only one to ever show him no fear and I was twelve years old. I am nineteen years old now and you look like a dentist turned supernatural monster hunter who was so incompetent at his job that he turned into a not-at-all-scary werewolf. I made my first kill when I was thirteen and he was a family member and I never regretted it because he hunted me like an animal for nearly two weeks. So, you don't scare me, so why don't you tell us where Heather Woodland is?"

He tried to cover up the fact he was unnerved and shaken now and he sat back in his chair.

"Woodland?" He feigned vague recognition at the name, "isn't she the girl that went missing a couple days ago?" 

Zoe smirked, confusing Slessman and she got up, spinning on her heel dramatically out of her chair and strode out.

Gideon's eyes darted around the kitchen, noting a recurring theme in the kitchen. Good boys. Growing up in an environment like that wasn't exactly likely to mold a dominant criminal; but the kind to mold... a submissive.

"Get him out of here." Gideon said and he left.

——————————————————————————————————

Hotch found Gideon, Alexander, and Zoe, Gideon wasn't speaking while Alexander once again was fussing over Zoe to put on her sunglasses.

"I'm not putting my sunglasses on. It's fucking dark out here. You know who wears sunglasses at night? Blind people and no-talent douchebags!" She hissed at him

"Hey." Hotch said.

Gideon turned to him, "He said 'isn't she the girl’. If he'd already killed her, he would have said—"

"'Wasn't she the girl'." 

"She's alive. We don't know for how long." Gideon said.

"Is it true what he said about CPR? I mean, I didn't know." Hotch said, gently.

"You want statistics on CPR, ask Reid or Zoe. She's the medical doctor. Zoe, what's the real statistics on CPR?"

"Forty-three percent survive." Zoe said, "Fifty-seven don't." 

"I wanna know if you're okay." Hotch told Gideon.

"I'm fine."

"Are you?"

"Think I can't do the job?" Gideon asked. 

"I think you can't be two different people at once." Hotch said and Zoe flinched.

"Conflicts in the profile." Zoe said.

"What?"

"Slessman's behavior fits a submissive of a duo. Part of the profile but another part conflicts it.

"Two different behaviors." Hotch said.

"Two different people." Zoe added.

"There's a second killer."

——————————————————————————————————

Apparently, the only friend Slessman had was his ex-cell mate, Charlie Linder. Alexander had refused to let Zoe go to the prison and for once she didn't fight him too hard on it. He told Hotch to make sure she didn't sneak off. Zoe was messing with a cube puzzle, sitting in a chair next to Spencer who was on his phone when Hotch approached.

"We get an address on Linder?"

"It's coming right now." Spencer said and turned to Hotch when he went past him, "Does senior management want a field assessment on Gideon? "

Hotch stepped towards the boy genius, "Don't worry about it."

"It's Morgan who's been worrying." Zoe muttered, still doing the cube.

"Are they nervous about him being in charge? Aren't you two on your way back to Slessman's house to help Morgan?" Hotch said and Zoe left to get the keys since Spencer drove so slowly.

"Do you know why he always introduces me as Doctor Reid?" Spencer asked.

"Because he knows that people see you as a kid, and he wants to make sure that they respect you." Hotch told him.

"But he never corrects people for Zoe and she's four years younger than me." Spencer said.

"You're about to be in a car alone with her for ten minutes. Ask her then." Hotch said as Zoe came back.

"It's here." She said.

"What's the address?" Hotch said as Zoe held the paper so they all could read it.

"Don't think it matters anymore." Spencer said.

——————————————————————————————————

Winston Churchill said, "the farther backward you can look, the farther forward you will see.

"I heard you ask Hotch why I never insist on being called Doctor and Gideon or Alexander never correct people when they call me 'Agent'." Zoe said and Spencer looked at her as he clutched his seat, tightly with her reckless driving, "It's because I know they see me as a kid and I want them to. I have always had the element of surprise. I have twenty-four degrees. I finished a four-year medical school in two years. I finished the FBI training in six weeks. I'm a five foot two, nineteen-year-old girl with dyed hair and I refuse to dress as professionally as everyone else. I want them to underestimate me. I prefer to show them up, you don't because you're better. You're... honestly, you're one-of-a-kind, Doctor Reid, I've never met anyone like you. And you should be respected for that." Spencer smiled, warmly at her. She glanced at him, "What?"

"You finished your FBI training in six weeks? That's a twenty-week program." Spencer asked in amused bewilderment.

——————————————————————————————————

Spencer sat on Slessman's bed, spinning a CD while Zoe tried listening to the music with his CD player to get into his headspace. She pulled off the headphones.

"Ugh, this is much too loud."

"I'd think rock was your style." Spencer said, in an attempt of conversation. Something he was terrible at. But Zoe had always been easy to talk to while simultaneously terrifying. She never judged him for being awkward or different. She never interrupted him when he went off on one of his rants like literally everyone else but his mother had but Zoe often had her own inputs of her own knowledge.

"Alternative rock is. Very rarely in the metal section. The only Black Sabbath song I ever heard is Iron Man. What music do you like? School House Rock?" Zoe asked as she took the CD out of the CD player.

"I like Beethoven."

"Ugh. I'll never understand how people can stand classical music." Zoe rolled her eyes as she picked up the nearest CD case. "It's boring and old and there's no story..."

"You gave me the CD case." Spencer reminded her,

Zoe looked at the case she was trying to put the CD in, "Oh, yeah, this isn't the right case..." An idea came to her. "He already had a case empty."

"Like he was using it. Nothing was in the CD player..." Spencer came to the same conclusion.

——————————————————————————————————

Morgan was pacing in the attic, "Oh, come on! I need a password. I need a password. What am I looking for? What could I possibly be looking for?"

"Zoe and I've been thinking about the CD's." Spencer said as he and Zoe entered as he turned a stretched-out paperclip in his hands.

"Oh, guys, come on. We tried the CD's. We searched, sifted, and sorted through every one of this guy's head-banging heavy metal collection. We gotta find something, or this girl is dead."

"Think we may have missed the obvious." Spencer said, using a paperclip to eject the CD holder.

"What are you doing?" Morgan asked and the ejector popped out, revealing a Metallica CD. Morgan picked it up, "Reid, Zoe, what made you think of this?"

"If you're putting this kind of protection on your computer, then you probably use it a lot, it's easier to use the laptop and listen to music on it at the same time." Zoe said.

"And it was the only empty case." Spencer added, handing Morgan the case.

"All right. I'm an insomniac who listens to Metallica to go to sleep at night. What song could possibly speak to me? 

"Enter Sandman." Zoe said so at once. "Trust me, I come from a family of sociopathic and violent insomniacs." Morgan put the password in as she added, "Or as we call ourselves 'independent women'." The home screen popped up, "Morgan, let me. I can find anything relating to Heather fastest."

Zoe pushed Morgan out of his chair and started to type at lightning speed, sticking a bit of her tongue out. Until a box popped up saying: "Are you sure you want to connect to T. Vogel's live camera?"

Yes.

Their eyes widened at what they saw. "Morgan, get the cops. The cops! Get the cops!" Morgan ran out, shouting for them. "Phone, where's my phone!"

She pulled it out of her pocket but dropped it. Spencer grabbed it, fumbling and handed it to her and she called Gideon, "Gideon, Heather's alive."

"How do you know?

"'Cause we're watching her right now."

——————————————————————————————————

They still didn't know where Heather was.

"Zoe, did you see that?" Spencer asked.

"Yeah."

"What?" Morgan asked.

"Zoe, can you show me the last twelve images lined up next to each other?"

"Yep." She said, popping the 'p', typing a few keys and bringing up the twelve.

"What?"

Zoe spoke just a fraction of a second before Spencer, "Right there."

"Right there." Spencer said, "You see that? The light bulb hanging from the wire? Yeah, what about it? It's shifting positions like it's swaying like the Earth is tilting." 

"Not the Earth, doc." Zoe said, "The ocean."

"I'll call, Hotch." Morgan said.

——————————————————————————————————

"According to Zoe, he wouldn't be able to transmit the webcam image from the middle of the ocean. It's the best we got, Hotch. Even if we're right, getting the exact location's on you, my friend. To work me a little magic."

——————————————————————————————————

Zoe sat in front of laptop and she messed with a glow in the dark spinning pen while Spencer absentmindedly messed with a puzzle box of hers.

"Zoe, would you knock that off, I feel like I'm going to have an epileptic seizure." Morgan complained.

"Technically, an epileptic seizure is caused by flashing lights." Spencer corrected.

Morgan snatched the pen from Zoe and she pulled out a shape-shifting fidget cube.

"Guys, look." She said, "he's inside." They saw Vogel unlocking the cage, "get Elle on the phone, Morgan!" She snatched her spinning pen back as he walked off to make the phone call. On the screen, Vogel started to pull Heather out of the cage when she kicked him in the face.

"Ooh." Spencer and Zoe said as they were getting their things together to leave.

"Good instincts, girl. But she won't get far, he's been starving her and raping her with various objects on a boat." Zoe said, "Let's just hope Gideon and Elle get to her in time. I'd better drive." 

——————————————————————————————————

Gideon had angered Vogel until he threw Heather aside to shoot him, allowing Elle to get a shot in, killing Vogel. Zoe had rushed over to check on Heather's condition at once, comforting her with Elle in hushed whispers, doing what she could with her portable mini-medical kit until the ambulance arrived.

Morgan sat with Hotch when the impulsive former cop asked, "So what kind of report do they want on him?"

"I suppose whether he's fit to be a field agent." Hotch said.

"Same one they wanted on Zoe?" Morgan asked.

"Same one they want monthly on Zoe." Hotch corrected.

"Think he'll pass?" Morgan asked after a chuckle at the jab towards the department's wild card.

"You know, Haley and I were looking at a baby names book. Guess what Gideon means in Hebrew." Hotch said as Spencer and Zoe walked up behind them.

"Mighty warrior." Spencer said and walked off before turning back to them, "Appropriate."

"Also, 'great destroyer'; 'great warrior', 'woodsman', 'one who cuts down'." Zoe said, "But apparently in the bible, Gideon was the name of a judge in the Bible and the angels called him a 'mighty warrior' or as Spencer explained to me for five full minutes, so indeed spot on." 

Morgan rolled his eyes at the two geniuses.

"So what are you gonna tell them?"

"About Gideon's report?" Zoe questioned. 

"What would you say?" Hotch asked Morgan. 

"Gideon saved her life. That's good enough for me." Morgan said and walked off.

"Seemed not to be good enough for him when we got here." Zoe murmured with a hint of teasing sarcasm in her tone.

"What do you think?" Hotch asked.

"I think... there may be setbacks due to the whole Adrian Bale situation, we may have a bomber eventually and he'll have to deal with that. But... he's the best and unless Rossi comes out of retirement or as I call it 'hiding from his dozen ex-wives', we could use a founder of the team who is not constantly worried about his daughter's safety and keeping the fact that the newest member of the team is his daughter a secret and the stress that his other daughter has been missing for four years now." Zoe sighed, "It's been four years since I escaped and I still have nightmares of the stuff I allowed myself to remember but eventually, I'm going to have nightmares of the stuff we see again, cases that don't end as well. He can't wait until the guilt stops because then he'll be waiting forever. The only way to stop feeling so guilty is by helping others, he can't do that on medical leave."

"You know you're too wise for nineteen."

"Yeah, the graduations from Yale, Harvard, MiT, and CalTech before I even graduated high school kind of tipped me off to that." She sassed, playfully, though she had an embarrassed blush on her cheeks.

——————————————————————————————————

On the plane back, Morgan was asleep in a chair, still clutching the file. Spencer was asleep on a couch, rather adorably which Zoe definitely did not think or care about and if she were awake she would not think his turning in his sleep was adorable either, nor would she care.

Only Alexander, Gideon, and Hotch were awake, Gideon sat in a seat on a laptop while Alexander sat on a couch diagonal to the older founder with Zoe asleep on the other side of the couch with her head laying on her balled up leather jacket in his lap, making the occasional noise in her sleep, usually it was incoherent mumbles or soft groans or moans but every once in a while, she muttered something.

"Mary... Mary Bell, ten years old... Scotswood... Newcastle... Tyne... nineteen-sixty-eight..." She muttered, apparently dreaming about one of the youngest female serial killers.

Alexander couldn't help but chuckle, having long since lost his concern of her growing up to be what he hunted.

"She still sleeps like she did as a toddler." Gideon remarked as Hotch sat in the seat across the aisle from Gideon.

"Hey."

Zoe suddenly stirred, her groans rising before she rolled over and hit the floor. She woke up, smacking her lips as she saw the three men looking down at her, all rather amused at how she could be both the definition of innocent and the antonym.

"Hey, guys. Uh... you and Haley pick the baby's name yet?" She ignored what happened as she lifted herself back onto the couch. Alexander wrapped his daughter into a fatherly one-armed hug, pulling her against him, kissing the top of her head.

Hotch smiled briefly before saying, "It's funny Haley liked the name Charles—but, you know all I could think of..."

"Manson." Gideon chuckled.

"Then there was Henry." Hotch said.

"Lee Lucas." Alexander supplied.

"Uh... Jeffrey."

"Dahmer." Zoe filled in the blank, sleepily.

"There's just too many of them."

"That was the problem when Zelena and I were coming up with names for this one and..." His eldest daughter's name died on his lips, "you know, luckily they both turned out to be girls and there's not as many girl serial killers."

"You wanna bet?" Zoe tilted her head up, giving him a challenging look. “Plus, you and mom picked the most bizarre names ever. Zarah and Xiomara.”

"Kind of hard to feel good about catching one when you know there are fifty more still out there." Gideon said.

Hotch looked away for a moment and the father and daughter exchanged looks, having a feeling he was thinking about that one serial killer who got away seven years prior.

"How's your report going?" Gideon said, having not been on the case due to his son Stephen having his appendix removed but knowing it weighed heavily on Hotch's shoulders. Hotch chuckled at Gideon, knowing this, "Didn't think you could hide that from an old profiler, now, did ya?"

"Oh, Gideon, you're not old. Not compared to Rossi, he's always been a cranky sixty-year-old man at heart." Zoe teased.

"You know, you saved that girl today. You can feel good about that." Hotch told Gideon.

"It is good. It's a good thing." Gideon said.

"Zoe, you need to go get some sleep. Go." Alexander said and pushed his daughter off the couch and towards the side of the plane where Spencer and Morgan were.

"Or else what? I'll turn into an UnSub?" She muttered, sarcastically before toppling herself in a couch beside Spencer's.

"She's good." Gideon said, 

——————————————————————————————————

Late February to Early March, 2005

Dumfries, Virginia

Nietzsche once said, "when you look long into an abyss, the abyss looks into you."

Soon before the Boston bombing case, Gideon was driving back to Quantico, talking to Zoe Noble-Valdez on the phone as a test run to see if she could get an interview was to create a profile for the Footpath Killer, theorizing a white man in his twenties, most likely an American van, a menial job that was most likely isolated containing few visitors and little to no possibility for witnesses, and a possible stutter.

He had already made the profile but she was doing it on her own which turned out to be a bit more detailed than his.

Zoe had been through a recent traumatic event just a few weeks before but Zoe had always been better at compartmentalizing and dealing with trauma better than others.

He hung up on the young girl he had helped his co-founder raise when he stopped at a gas station in the middle of nowhere to get gas. He filled up his car tank and went inside the gas station for some unnecessities.

He took a single candy bar and placed it at the counter, "I'll take this." 

As the gas station clerk rang up the purchase, Gideon's eyes wandered behind him to the wall of photos, noticing several but not all were of the Footpath Killer's known victims, they were up-close and personal. 

Gideon turned to see the cashier's truck, it was an old, dingy American truck, maybe a Chevy, looking like it could use some repairs.

The cashier's gas station was in the middle of nowhere, isolated enough for the occasional customer with little to no risk of a witness.

He turned back to the cashier, a white man who seemed to be in his mid-twenties. Only one characteristic remained.

"Have a n-n—a n-n-n-nice day." He stuttered. He had a stutter. He fit the profile to a "T"

Gideon looked at the clerk for a long time and then the clerk glanced down to see Gideon's holster. He was law enforcement but he didn't react with Gideon watching him. 

Gideon took the money and left the store as the clerk moved quickly inside the shop and reappeared behind him with a shotgun. Gideon spotted him in the reflection of a sign, pointing the gun at him, ready to fire.

*Spencer Reid Gif Source: @borahaes*

*Edited November 8, 2024*

[drusilla-carstairs]

oooh i love the clary dying theory but also idk would miss cc really do it? she loves clace i can’t see her killing one of of them and i honestly don’t think she’s going to kill any one the tmi gang just because she tends to avoid major character deaths like that (and also considering the economic factors of killing clary, i don’t think cc will do it because i definitely see her milking tmi gang shorts in the future AND there is that tendency of hers to end each series with a wedding…) REGARDLESS i love your thoughts that was genuinely so interesting!!!

unrelated but i have a theory that kieran will die in TWP. i feel like cc is foreshadowing it with him not loving being king and again, i think she goes for more convenient deaths. kieran’s death would be devastating but mark and christina would have each other and it would be a herongraystairs vibe

i could see one of the tmi gang members getting massively injured though. maybe jace or clary?

in the case that janus does take clary or whatever, i think it would really be interesting for cc to explore some of clary’s trauma there and how she may need some space from jace (considering him and janus look the same) and i think that could achieve the same objective of jace actively choosing to not be like janus because we know that his faith in himself is fully tied to the fact that clary thinks he is good. clary briefly needing space would break that foundation jace has and he would have to actively work on making himself and others believe that he is good

sorry that was complete word vomit!! i’m also searching for any twp crumbs 😭 the kickstarter books need to come asap but in the meantime i’m lurking in the tags and ask boxes! thank you 💗💗

sorry for taking so long to get to this, last week was busy, then I forgot this was in here rip

idk, there is a chance that she could kill Clary and bring her back (a nice symmetry with Jace in City of Glass), but honestly I think if she did kill Clary it would be permanent. I am not entirely sold that this will happen, I don't know Cassie's mind, but I think narratively it could make for good storytelling, you know? Same as when we all thought Matthew would like in The Last Hours. (She could also still end the series with a Sizzy wedding !)

The only thing holding me back from the idea that Kieran could die is that it would be too close to a "bury your gays" trope for CC. Yes, she has other queer characters, so it wouldn't be, but Keiran is 1/3 of the only poly relationship in TSC, and I don't think she would want to break that. Also Cristina and Mark are very different from herongraystairs, in my opinion, because it was never really a 'choice' with those three. I also think that Kieran getting to retire of his own free will would be a great end to his arc--whether this would mean Ash or Kit has to take his place, or Faerie works out a democracy, I don't have the slightest clue, but I do think that with a title like "The Last King of Faerie" Kieran will be stepping down and neither Ash nor Kit will step up.

I also think Janus kidnapping Clary would be interesting because it could so easily parallel her time kidnapped by Sebastian. It is good angst fodder for sure. I don't think this will happen in TWP though, because it is not focused on the TMI gang (something CC keeps reiterating, she does not want us to get our hopes up), and a plot like that would need a lot of time in Clary's POV. It could possibly happen in the last Eldest Curses novel, though, since that comes out between TWP books.

Don't apologize, I love getting asks !!! Even if I forget to answer them from time to time lol.

[im-out-of-it]

season 2, episode 10, part 12 MALECS FIRST I LOVE YOU AND I ALMOST PUT KISS OOPS, “by the light of dawn”

157. ah shit, I think I left off here. did I? let’s just pretend I did

Raphael: thank fuck I have vampire speed

158. damn, Izzy and Raphael just broke up

159. did Raphael go about it the wrong way? absolutely but I can still understand why he did it in the way he did. I think show Raphael is always stuck between wanting to do good for his clan and desperately missing how his life used to be. I don’t see why they needed to end Raphael and Izzy though. like at least give them a try

160. jace thinks clary will drop Simon asap which in a way, she probably would but he’s entitled to think he’s that desirable that clary would instantly leave Simon. show and book Simon and clary are very different. Clary couldn’t give book Simon the time of day. but she seems to at least like Simon a little in the show. I wouldn’t go so far to say she loves him because she definitely prioritizes jace over him but she loves him as a friend. Simon later says “you don’t love me the way I love you” or something like that and it’s 100% right.

161. Alec: I could’ve told you that

162. Jace is like I’m going to get her back because it’s that easy for me

163. no mention of his wolves so as long as clary is fine that’s all he cares about

164. Jace thought it was going to be easy BITCH YOU THOUGHT

165. I WAS LITERALLY LOOKING FOR THIS GIF WHEN I POSTED MAGS HAS ARRIVED BUT HERE IT IS

166. it’s a good scene when you can see the jealousy on jace’s face. I honestly think he thought clary would dump Simon and date him instead asap

167. and I’m pretty sure this is supposed to be Sebastian. book Sebastian, absolutely hate him. there was no need for him to sexually assault clary to show how evil he is. and then to have clary grieve him on top of that? AND THEN TO MAKE IS SUFFER ANOTHER JACE AND JONATHON IN THULE. please don’t allow CC to ever write about trauma. she doesn’t know how. but show Sebastian? I FUCKING LOVE HIM. I tend to feel bad for him for all he went through and I like how the show doesn’t try to do the incest as hard as CC does. ITS LITERALLY IN ALL HER BOOKS. and fucking hell, I wanted him to kill jace. I think he’s more charismatic and you tend to feel more sympathy for him. I’m talking about Sebastian- not jonathon. the only time I was grossed out was when he kissed clary. but I feel his actions tend to make sense and he’s shown to be more sympathetic

168. might as well finish the gif amount and finish it off with Malec (and they have been used but it feels illegal to not fill it all up with gifs)

YES I ADDED ALEC WITH WEAPONS I CANT HELP IF HES PERFECT

169. I’ve repeated myself on the things I don’t like: but basically how jace just keeps getting away with so much and doesn’t seem to care. Luke irritates me too and he doesn’t deserve to be pack leader. I hate this whole shadowhunters can do whatever but downworlders can’t. the downworlders are obviously going to revolt if their family members died. but shadowhunters only care if their people die (and not all but most). I wish this was something the show would improve on because they had the potential. it’s almost like downworlders have to walk on glass around the clave. also tired of jace and clary doing whatever and everyone accepts it. I’m going to feel so sad for Simon soon. he would die for clary and she would just choose jace over him consistently. also hate the new intro when clary says Magnus, a warlock and three bravest shadowhunters- jace, Izzy, Alec and I’m pretty sure that’s her order of who she likes. if they were going to do voiceovers, they should have included everyone and done different ones 🙄

170. what I love: THE FUCKING MALEC CONTENT MAIA BEING RIGHTFULLY ANGRY AND THE IZZY AND RAPHAEL STUFF. the beautiful Alec stuff. he just keeps getting better and better. his fighting skills which I appreciate is nothing like book Alec. his caring nature. if I were Alec, I would be mad at jace but he goes back and is friendly with Jace as if nothing happened. and I get the whole manipulation but it doesn’t sit right with me. Alec goes from fighting his impulses to slowly taking his time dating Magnus to telling him he never thought he could have what he wants to fighting about Izzy and being mad at Magnus and then to freaking out over his possible death and proclaiming his love.

Alec is absolute perfection. his scenes are too notch and Matt kills it everytime. (he is seriously one of the most underrated actors) his anger towards aldertree, post Malec argument to kissing Magnus with all his love is everything. he’s got so much range. and he’s also a character that just instantly forgives (which I don’t think he should) but Alec stuff 10/10.

Magnus scenes- absolutely riveting. his selflessness, trying to protect downworld and also clary at the same time but also showing his subtle signs of worrying about Alec. he doesn’t say it but you can clearly see it on his face. showing madzie all the love (and I also love how madzie saves Alec) and just being the most caring sweet man. Magnus and Alec holding each other after professing their love and the kiss was the best scene in the entire episode. you can see their fears and their love expressed on their faces. (Harry is also very underrated as an actor) Magnus content 10/10

why does the show have so much Malec fans? JUST LOOK AT THEM. they were able to bring toxic book Malec into passionate happy healthy so much bloody chemistry let’s root for them show Malec. Malec has the biggest fan base for a reason. and I’m going to say, it’s not because of the books.

I don’t know anyone who prefers the book Malec version who also likes the show. they just don’t exist

the Maia stuff was also very good as well. she’s such a complex character and I love to see storylines for her. I was a tad upset that Raphael and Izzy didn’t have a chance but I also enjoy their friendship. the show is great at giving the side characters who got shoved away in the books a chance to shine and have heir own stuff going on. all in all, I’d give this episode a 7.5 rating (probably)

so that is it for this episode with 170 for the number. thank you for joining MALEC TOLD EACH OTHER THEY LOVE ONE ANOTHER AND ARE SOULMATES and ew can CLACE go the fuck away yet? discussion post debate shitpost bitchfest roast. I’ll be doing the 11th episode probably tomorrow or at least I hope so. we’re getting so close to 12 and that is one of my favorite but also hated episodes for a reason. unpopular opinion maybe but azazel is one of my favorite villains and I love him. not what he did to mags obviously but his powers are so unique and he should have stayed on for more episodes. I needed to see more princes of Hell. but it’ll be fun!!!!!!!!! see y’all soon and thank you for tolerating me I KNOW IM TOO MUCH

[gellavonhamster]

monthly media recap: september 2023

read:

Angélique, the Road of Hope and The Victory of Angélique by Anne Golon - can't believe I finished this, lol. It's a pity book 14 wasn't published, but book 13 provides a conclusion to many main plotlines, so it's still a decent ending. I will always wonder if another one of my brotps was supposed to reunite in the last book, though :D For all its faults, enjoyed this series tremendously; it's the people helping and supporting each other even in the bleakest circumstances for me

Ten Thousand Stitches by Olivia Atwater - Regency Faerie Tales part two, even cuter than part one. Seriously, these books are such a delight, I need to read part three ASAP

Spēlēju, dancoju / I Played, I Sang by Rainis - girl help, my Latvian vocabulary does not include that much archaic and/or poetic language, but I did understand enough to see how beautiful it is

Gaywick by Vincent Virga - I read that one liveblogging thread/channel, so I was familiar with the plot, but it was still so interesting to see it all happen. Incredible how a book can cover so many disturbing, truly Gothic themes and still be hopeful and sweet, loved it

Vadriel Vail by Vincent Virga - Gaywick Trilogy book 2, not nearly as good as the first one. Constant timeskips, important events only told in passing, one of the MCs is a boring Gary Stu and the other disgusting. Bearable thanks to the first one's wife and characters from book 1

The Price Guide to the Occult by Leslye Walton - it's not terrible and had some interesting stuff, but still felt sort of... superficial? Most of the characters felt underdeveloped, the story often felt like an outline. I bought it mostly because it was cheap and I'm glad it was.

+ currently reading Children of Paradise (Gaywick Trilogy #3)

watched:

Apteeker Melchior / Melchior the Apothecary (2023) - a murder mystery set in medieval Tallinn. Something bugged me about the dialogue, but I mostly enjoyed the plot and the familiar setting

The Skeleton Key (2005) - Southern Gothic, a grim old house, and Hoodoo magic. Enjoyed the final plot twists and how they recontextualize a lot of stuff earlier in the movie. Was rooting for the heroine but also had to hand it to the antagonists in the end, good for them

Gentlemen Prefer Blondes (1953) - so, so charming. Impossible not to hum and move along to the songs. Marilyn Monroe, of course, is a goddess, but Jane Russell tho... gentlemen might prefer blondes but I'm no gentleman

How to Marry a Millionaire (1953) - also charming and funny, though I found it a bit less interesting than the previous one; still good though

Constantine (2005) - I frequently felt like I was missing some context. Either I'm stupid or it's just because I haven't read the comics, but shouldn't a movie adaptation be understandable even for those unfamiliar with the source? Otherwise it was ok and had Rachel Weisz in it

Rebecca (1940) - not nearly as haunting as the novel, but a good film nevertheless. Mostly I just wanted to protect the narrator :( she's so cute

also, a bit unrelated, probably, but I saw two theatre performances last month - one was a live screening of Good by the National Theatre (powerful, amazingly done, probably wouldn't have decided to see it by myself, so thanks to the friend who suggested it) and the other The Three Musketeers neo-classical ballet at the Latvian National Opera and Ballet (really nice, cool stage design, I posted a trailer here)

[demdifferentstories-29]

Get To Know Me

Thank you for the tag, @quite-right-too <3 No pressure tags - @bronzeagepizzeria, @naaer, @hgracieeees

What is your name? Lily.

For how long have you had this account? Technically around eight years (the original @demdifferentstories account), but this one is around nine months old I think?

Favourite food? I'm forever a slut for chocolate!

Favourite drink? Really depends, honestly! But you can never go wrong with Coke/Pepsi (can you tell I have a bad sweet tooth yet?).

Do you have any siblings? Three, and I'm the youngest of them.

Do you have pets? Yes - a very silly, chaotic bichon frise. He's the third dog I've had. My cat passed away earlier this year and I miss her deeply!

How old are you? Just turned twenty!

How many languages do you know? Just the one (English), however, I was pretty damn good at Japanese in high school and I'm keen to learn other languages.

What's your all-time favourite movie/tv show? Movie is easy - Spider-Man (2002). It's been my favourite film for sixteen years! In terms of TV, Friends has always been a big comfort show for me as I grew up watching it. Broadchurch and Jessica Jones Season 1 are some of the handful of shows I've rewatched multiple times, so I think it contends. Regarding Doctor Who, I really only genuinely care about RTD's era, so not overly sure if that would qualify!

What are you enjoying to do in your free time? At the moment, all I really do in my free time is write :,) But I also read, play guitar and sing, and I draw and embroider every so often.

Are you an introvert or an extrovert? Ambiverted with a tendency towards extroverted - once I'm comfortable with you, it's hard to keep me away!

Your favourite music genres? Metal and rock! More specifically, I've always enjoyed metalcore and other emo subgenres, but I listen to an array of bands.

Your dream place to visit? I would really like to visit the UK/Europe - specifically (Northern) Ireland, England, Scotland and Italy. I'm not the biggest fan of travelling, so I'm content with staying where I am.

Something you wish you were better at? I've always had really bad practising habits, so I wish I was more proficient in my guitar playing - it's something I always add to my New Year resolutions lol. Would also like to pick up piano, and I wish I was still into art/drawing as much as I used to be. Also would like to be a bit better at acting - I think I've gone a bit stiff since transitioning from high school theatre to university theatre as the classes aren't as practical.

How long do you take to respond to texts? ASAP! I'm not afraid of being an immediate responder. However, I might take a while if I'm busy/unavailable or if I'm not in the mood to talk to people (not anything personal - constantly socialising at uni and work drains me a lot and can make me a bit overstimulated/whelmed, so I just need alone time to balance it all it as I can find messaging to have the same effect as physical interaction/communication).

Do you have any tattoos? If not, would like to? I have three - one is a peace lily (namesake), and the other two are text ones related to the band Muse. I have about a dozen more planned, but they are expensive.

What's your sexuality? Bisexual!

Do you like reading? If yes what's your favourite book? Love reading, but I've found myself with not much time for it this year (including fics :(). My favourite book is Red Dragon by Thomas Harris - it's the first installation in the Hannibal Lecter series, and I think it's criminally underrated and overshadowed by The Silence of the Lambs. I also really loved The Handmaid's Tale when I read it - stuck with me for a long time.

Have you ever been in love? I don't think so. Maybe a little bit?

What's your relationship status? Single, but content.

Have you ever been heartbroken? Not romantically, but definitely by friends and family.

Best memory you could think of? I have a pretty horrible memory, but I can still recall the excitement I felt about my first concert.

Worst memory you can think of? Ah, my greatest strength! I won't delve into the more sordid/upsetting parts of my life, but things like having meltdowns/overstimulation prior to my diagnosis and not really understanding what was wrong with me were always quite upsetting for me.

Do you have any fears? I've always been a pretty bad arachnophobe, but I've gotten better. We won't get into others.

Are you a morning or a night person? It tends to shift depending on an array of things, but probably night - I have bad habits of staying up.

How many pictures you have on your phone? 12,314 (yes, I know - I'm insane).

Who was your favourite childhood crush? Oh, boy. Well, we can credit Kirsten Dunst and Kate Winslet to my (subconscious) bisexual awakening. In terms of men, I always thought Tobey Maguire had a cute quality to him.

Are you a romantic? I mean I don't really have the data to back it up, but I'd say probably - I have plenty of romantic fantasies and desires. Plus the shit I write can be so mushy and intimate.

What’s your dream date? No idea, really. Probably something that allows us to be relaxed, take our time and chat - a meal, a walk, etc. I imagine I would probably already be heaps stressed out about going out on a date, so avoiding overstimulation and such would help my case heaps.

What are your hobbies? Music, writing and reading are the primaries. Embrodiery is a smaller one that I hope to make more regular again. I also collect vinyl and CDs. Hope to get more involved in acting/theatre production during the rest of my degree too!

[fahrni]

Saturday Morning Coffee

Good morning from Charlottesville, Virginia! ☕️

Well, well, well, sick again, I see. Yes indeed I am. This time it’s not a stomach virus, this time it’s a common everyday cold. Stuffy head, runny nose, tired. It’s annoying. 🤧

Let’s get to the links. Enjoy!

Evan Symon • California Globe

A new ballot effort aimed at asking Californians if the state should remain in the union was approved for signature gathering to appear on the 2028 ballot on Friday.

This is nothing more than performative as it’s illegal to secede from the Union.

I mean, seeing California, Oregon, and Washington becoming their own country or joining Canada would be amazing. I’d certainly want to move back ASAP. 🤣

Isaac Halvorson

Lately I’ve been on the hunt for a personal database application that I could use to store, manipulate, and explore data important to me. I think I’m at least now able to articulate what it is I want, but I haven’t yet been able to find anything that perfectly matches the daydream.

This is really interesting. There are a number of database products available for the Mac, I personally use Base and love it, but something a bit more user friendly could make for an amazing product for someone. I’d personally love to see a forms creation product with a database behind it so I could make custom forms and put them on an iPad, iPhone, or Mac. It would be great for folks who do sidewalk questionnaires.

Something like this probably already exists. I just haven’t looked for it.

Ernie Smith • PC Gamer

For the first time in nearly 20 years, WordPress no longer feels like a sure bet if you need to get a website online.

Ah, yes, the WordPress saga continues. I wonder what Matt is up to? It feels like he’s partially giving up. I hate to see that as WordPress is critical infrastructure on the internet. It powers so many sites and I can see it doing so much more.

Roger Monty’s • Search Engine Journal

Three unrelated things happened in the world of WordPress and Content Management Systems which may point the direction of how content is published on the web. Two of the developments are directly related to WordPress and has the feel of pieces falling into place.

This is a very interesting piece. If a community rises up out of WordPress and forks it I could see Matt losing out and losing control of the future of WordPress. It would be really nice to see him do something similar to what Eugen Rochko did for Mastodon.

Joan Westenberg • The Index

Tesla is dying. The company’s fourth-quarter earnings read like a eulogy for the electric dream. Revenue crawled up just 2% to $25.71 billion, missing analyst estimates by over $1.5 billion. Automotive revenue - the heart of Tesla’s business - collapsed 8% to $19.8 billion. Operating income cratered 23% year-over-year to $1.6 billion. The operating margin withered to 6.2% from 8.2% a year earlier. These are the vital signs of a company in free fall.

I can only imagine it’s gonna get worse. Who wants to buy a car from a company with a Nazi as CEO?

The Tesla Board needs to grow a collective pair and fire the man. Get someone who will turn Tesla around.

I wonder when we’re going to see a round of layoffs from Tesla?

Charlie Stross

Microsoft Word is a tyrant of the imagination, a petty, unimaginative, inconsistent dictator that is ill-suited to any creative writer’s use. Worse: it is a near-monopolist, dominating the word processing field. Its pervasive near-monopoly status has brainwashed software developers to such an extent that few can imagine a word processing tool that exists as anything other than as a shallow imitation of the Redmond Behemoth. But what exactly is wrong with it?

Charlie is a professional writer and he has a monster hatred for Microsoft Word. That made me ask myself what do writers actually use for writing their novels and books?

I know John Scalzi uses Word, but does he strip it down or just use it out of the box?

George R. R. Martin uses 1980s era WordStar for DOS.

From the article.

But then he did one better. He told Conan that he has two computers, one that’s up-to-date and has Internet access, and one that’s ancient and runs DOS. He uses the newer machine for browsing the Web and checking emails, but he turns to the older one when it’s time to write. And his late-’80s software of choice is the classic word processor WordStar 4.0.

I’d love to see someone collect data on what famous authors use as their word processor or typewriter of choice.

Andrew Cunningham • Ars Technica

But regardless of geography, it feels an awful lot like OpenAI wants to benefit from unlimited access to others' work while also restricting similar access to its own work.

I LOL’d when I read OpenAI isn’t happy about DeepSeek possibly using ChatGPT to train their model, given OpenAI crawled the web and trained their LLM with our work. Oh the irony.

Chris Smith • BGR

“When I think about where I’ll raise a future family or how much to save for retirement, I can’t help but wonder: Will humanity even make it to that point?” he asked.

I think it’s healthy to have a bit of skepticism about LLM’s and where the future of actual AI leads us. Doom is not such a bad answer. Let’s be cautious and slow down the pace. I’d definitely hate to see someone crest SkyNet. 🤔

Dustin Albino • NASCAR News

Corey LaJoie to run partial Cup schedule for RWR, joins Prime Video as analyst

I’m happy for Corey! I’m a fan. He’s been an underdog forever and may not have the skill of top drivers but the man doesn’t give up. I’m excited to see how his own team — Stacking Pennies Performance — does this year! Getting the 01 number was quite clever. Since he’s not a chartered NASCAR member it means he’s not guaranteed a spot on the grid. What does that mean? It means there are only so many spots available to racers and he will have to qualify his way in! He starts his new adventure at the Great American Race in Daytona this month. If he qualifies it’s a victory given the number of racers qualifying Open cars.

If I were some super rich dude I’d definitely get behind this guy.

Jim Acosta

I struggled for a bit trying to decide what to write about in my next Substack. But as this - how should I put this - batsh*t crazy week came to a close, I came to the conclusion that this post needs to be about you.

Man! I wish I were enough of a somebody to get Mr. Acosta to listen to me. All of this attention focused on Substack is not good. They support Nazi and white supremacist content on their platform but so many writers and reporter, like Mr. Acosta, just ignore it.

It’s mind boggling how they can ignore the sins of Substack while covering the likes of Donald Trump and the hate and cruelty he foists on so many groups of people here in the United States.

Get off the platform.

Politics

Ethan Jones • Bylines Cymru

Donald Trump has entered the White House again, an astonishing number of American voters seemingly unbothered by his authoritarian rhetoric, let alone the fact he’s an adjudicated rapist and 34-time convicted felon. No wonder the ‘f’ word is in use more than ever, especially due to the actions of Trump’s apparent right-hand man, the unelected Elon Musk.

Keep saying it. Donald J. Trump is an adjudicated rapist and 34 time felon. Oh, and he’s a fascist to boot.

Piece of garbage human.

PZ Myers

I’ve been getting reassuring emails from my university to let me know that they have assembled a team to respond to the federal government shut down of NIH and NSF funded research. In case you hadn’t heard, they canceled review panels at NSF and suspended research at NIH. They made the uncertainty that has always haunted research funding far more shaky. This is a warning shot — they’re going to make everyone conscious of the fact that the Trump team, a collection of idiots with no qualifications in science to throttle any and all science they don’t like.

It’s depressing to see the greatest nation on the planet shut down scientific research. The Marmalade Messiah is trying his best to turn the United States of America into an Idiocracy.

Levi Rickert • Native News Online

The Trump administration’s intensified deportation efforts have created unexpected challenges for Navajo citizens living in urban areas like Phoenix. As the U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE) began widespread raids in major cities across the country following the start of President Donald Trump’s second term, concerns have surfaced about Native Americans being mistaken for undocumented immigrants.

I knew something like this would happen. It was bound to given how gung-ho ICE has been about “rounding up” brown skinned people.

What an absolute shit show. One that will affect so many lives. It’s terribly cruel and pathetic.