#i might not feel AS negative as i do if they changed a little bit left out a few lines and left that one deleted scene
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mephoj · 8 months ago
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late night chat
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#meeple.png#inanimate insanity#inanimate insanity invitational#ii oj#ii mephone4#ii mephoj#not inherently shippy but it is based on the weird gay little version of iii in my head#anyway i think they should've had some kind of summer romance in iii that changes their view on their lives forever#and leaves them haunted by eachother in a way that neither will want to address but it sticks with them#oj is Stuck in his shitty hotel job and kind of caged himself into that the more he insists its Just the way it is and hes fine with it#while mephone has simply gotten used to running away and hiding as much as he can#neither are good coping mechanisms but the kind of experience and perspective they have could be exactly what they need to hear#oj needs to Fucking Quit while mephone needs to let himself find community and let others know him#so he doesn't feel like he Has to run or he Has to do it alone#oj has connections albeit some messier than others#and hes a bit of a bitch but definitely more liked than mephone#and mephone has the If It Sucks Hit The Bricks mentality and the bluntness to get that through to oj#oj also has the perspective of being a s1 vet which means he has a very different view on mephone than others might#and that could do some good in getting through to mephone how his host behavior can negatively affect the contestants involved#mephone views oj as more equal to him as theyre business partners. hes very friendly to him (even if one sided.) he might just listen#sorry if this rant is redundant btw im not reading back any of this HAHA
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cacw · 8 months ago
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captain america the first avenger is my friend
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wayfinderships · 2 years ago
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Hmmmm...
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orcelito · 2 years ago
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Had a moment of "Why do I feel so melancholy haha" and then I remembered that my uncle literally died yesterday
I've been compartmentalizing like crazy I guess
#speculation nation#negative/#death/#we arent holding the funeral immediately bc he wanted his body donated to science#so im still in colorado and im just. here for the duration of my trip.#trying to enjoy myself. doing some insane emotional acrobatics to stuff that shit Down#helps that it doesnt really feel real. im all the way over here. all i have is the word of my sister to know anything's different.#so im here. im existing. even acting approximately normal.#but things still feel a bit off-kilter. the stress lines of a container being pushed further than it should be.#and a passive longing to be with my family.#im going to be meeting my girlfriend's family today. just as we'd been planning.#and it feels a little wrong. the wrong family for me to be going to.#but im not Going to that family. im going to this one. bc that's what we had planned.#backing out wouldnt get me to see my own family today. so im staying true to my promise.#i just might end up a Little emotionally exhausted from the effort of pretending everything's fine haha#im good at it though. i really am very good at it.#also helps that i knew this was coming. with Cassy it went down in a matter of days.#i knew he was Dying an hour before it happened. it was abrupt and frankly kind of traumatic bc of it#just like with Sammy.#with my uncle it's a deeper level of serious. a deeper change to the foundations of my life.#but... ive known this was happening for almost two months now. it was a rapid decline but i'd already started grieving.#spending the past few weeks visiting and preemptively grieving. watching him decline more and more.#seeing him two days ago and seeing how Bad it was. and knowing he didnt have much longer...#i knew it was going to happened. id hoped it wouldnt happen until after i was back from my trip.#but he's gone and im still here. and the plans move on.#time to compartmentalize and forget. at least until i'm alone again.
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luveline · 5 months ago
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would you ever write a ditsy!reader with sirius? where he's grumpy and she's just giggly and makes him feel a little less grumpy? I love you and your writing sending kisses <3
I love you
Fuck’s sake. Sirius glares at the TV. Fuck off. 
“What’s it say?” you call from the kitchen. 
“It’s raining all weekend.” 
“No way, really?” You appear with a tea towel in your hands, wiping your fingers dry one at a time. “Shit, sorry, baby. I guess we better get out our rain ponchos.” 
Sirius loves concerts, but he hates shitty weather. “What if they cancel?” 
“I don’t think they’ll cancel.” You put the tea towel on the coffee table and gesture for him to do something. What it is you want is unclear, but Sirius leans back, and, as usual, you make yourself at home in his lap. Gentle but not shy. “We might get a bit muddy, is all.” 
You rest your ribs half on his chest and half against the sofa. This close, he can confess to finding you the kind of beautiful that makes his jaw ache. Being around you is like a constant re-realisation that you’re his amazing girl, his one good love, as he likes to put it. Romance has never felt more real to him than when he’s with you, slipping his arm behind your back, and letting your nose at his jawline. Then the man on TV says the area is at risk of thunder and lightning on Saturday and he forgets to be in love. 
“Fucking hell,” he complains, clinging to you as though you have the power to change what the weatherman has to say. 
“It won’t be as bad as you’re thinking,” you sing-song back. 
“No, we’ll be turned to husks when we’re struck by lightning, but I’m sure it’ll be great.” 
“So negative,” you murmur, drawing along his collar. 
“I’m being realistic, lovely, our weekend is completely ruined.” 
“That’s not true, is it? Your weekend is ruined. Mine is the same as it was, because I don’t care if it rains on Metallica, I just want to spend time with you.” 
“You’re such a dick,” he says through a soft laugh. 
“Why? Because I am clearly the more loving partner?” you tease. 
“Yes. Because I don’t care about you at all, I only care about the concert, and spending time with you means nothing to me.” 
“Oh, well when you put it like that,” you murmur, leaning in to kiss his neck softly. Short presses of your lips with the faintest of sounds, then you're giggling. He’s glad you can’t see his face. You’d run with the honeyed smile he wears now. He would never hear the end of it. 
“I’ll have to find your anorak,” he says, rubbing a loving path down your back. 
“We’ll get the thermals out of the attic. Don’t worry, baby, the rain won’t ruin all your fun.” You kiss him again, and laugh like you’ve made a joke he isn’t privy to. 
“What’s funny?” he asks. 
“I just love you when you’re mad.” 
“I’m not mad.” 
“Aggrieved, then.” You lift your face only to hold his and press your nose to his cheek. You move your face back and forth, like a hurried nuzzling. “You’re such a downer.” 
“Stop it.” 
“Make me,” you say through giggles. 
He closes his eyes and turns in for a proper kiss. 
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psychoticallykind · 23 days ago
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Baby
"Baby" - Jegulus Microfics - @into-the-jeggyverse - 617 words
Warnings: Trans Regulus with threatened pregnancy, period in trans character.
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James came home with a weird feeling in his chest, opening the front door a little quieter than usual. "Regulus?"
The kitchen and living room were empty, but Regulus's jacket was still hanging up where it had been this morning. James dropped his keys on the kitchen counter, taking a few seconds to grab a water bottle before he continued searching for his fiance. "Reg? Hey, love, are you home?"
The hall bathroom was empty, and the library, and the bedroom.
The ensuite bathroom, however - James felt his heart drop as he approached the door, knocking gently. "Reg? Hey, are you okay? I have this feeling - nevermind."
"I'm fine," Regulus called back, but his voice was thick with tears.
James bit his lip. "Can I open the door?"
There was a short pause, and then, "Okay."
James opened the door slowly. Regulus was sitting on the closed toilet seat, so James knelt in front of him. "Hey." He lifted a hand, tracing over tear tracks. "What's wrong?"
"Nothing," Regulus mumbled. He took a deep breath, and then mumbled something under his breath.
James nodded. "I didn't hear that, but take this." He opened the bottle before handing it over. "And maybe try again?"
Regulus took a small sip of the water. His eyes were somewhere on the floor as he whispered, "It was late."
"What was late?" James asked.
"My -" Regulus made a face, gesturing down. "Blood. Monthly. You know."
"Oh," James realized. "I'm sorry. Did it come today? Do you need painkillers? A bath? I can run you one."
"No, that's -" Regulus broke off, smiling a little. "That would be nice, but that's not why I'm a mess, Jamie. I thought I might be -" Regulus stopped again, grimacing. "I can't say it. I'll throw up."
James nodded, not understanding quite yet. He rubbed gentle circles on Regulus's thighs. "You don't have to. It's okay."
Regulus picked up the trash can and tilted it. "Look."
James obediently looked in the trash can, frowning in confusion as he spotted - "Are those pregnancy tests?"
Regulus squeezed his eyes shut, nodding once. "Mhm."
"Oh." James nodded again, processing. "And..." He took another second. "And they're negative."
Regulus swallowed. "Are - nope." He tilted his head back, looking up at the ceiling. "Are you disappointed?"
James blinked. "What?"
"Disappointed," Regulus repeated. "That I'm not - that I don't want - that."
"No," James said vehemently. He brought one hand to the back of Regulus's head, gently urging him to look back down. "Love, no. Absolutely not. I would absolutely never ask that of you."
Regulus nodded, tipping his head back down but still not quite meeting James's eyes. "You don't want a baby?"
"You're enough for me," James promised. "We talked about this, remember? I wouldn't be here if I wasn't okay with this. You don't want kids, and I don't need them. I just need you."
"What -" Regulus swallowed again. "What if I changed my mind?"
Hesitant grey eyes met James's own. "Not - not having one. I never want to have one. Biologically, I mean. But - but maybe raising one? With you? We could do that. If you wanted."
James felt his head tilt as he tried to work that out. "You want a child?"
"No." Regulus bit his lip. "Maybe." He took a quick breath. "Yes."
James nodded slowly, thinking it over. "Okay. If you want one, then I'm all for it, love. Absolutely."
Regulus grinned. "Really?"
"Really," James promised. He stood up. "I'm going to run you a bath, and grab you some painkillers, and we can talk more about this if you want. Yes?"
"Yes," Regulus agreed, still beaming.
James grinned back. "And drink some more of that water, please."
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im-so-normal-iswear · 1 month ago
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Jealous triple s, and how they deal with it, would they be insecure? Would they be unbothered?
take your time!
Jealous Sonic, Shadow, and Silver x Reader
Sonic:
Sonic’s confidence is one of his most defining traits, but when he gets jealous, that cool, carefree demeanor takes a serious hit. He’s usually so sure of himself, it’s part of his charm. But when someone else starts vying for your attention? That’s when cracks begin to show.
It starts small. You’re chatting with someone else, and Sonic catches sight of your laugh, the way your eyes light up. He doesn’t like how that person leans in a little too close or how their hand lingers just a moment too long. Sonic doesn’t want to admit it, but he’s... uncomfortable.
"Hey, Y/N!" Sonic’s voice cuts through the conversation, loud and bright. He zips up to your side, arm slinging around your shoulder in an overly casual gesture. "Whatcha talkin’ about? Anything cool, or is it just boring stuff?"
He flashes his signature grin, it sidnt reach his eyes tho as he just stared at them. The other person gets the hint, offering a polite excuse to leave, and Sonic is immediately all over you.
"Phew! Thought I’d have to rescue you from that snoozefest." He laughs, but his eyes linger on your face, searching. "You’re not, like, too close with them, are you?"
If you call him out on his jealousy, he’ll deny it, waving it off with a sheepish chuckle. "Jealous? Me? Nah, I’m way too cool for that." Before speeding away to not have to deal with his problems.
Despite his bravado, Sonic can’t help but feel a little insecure. What if he’s not enough? He’s fast, adventurous, and fun, but is that all you see him as? These thoughts are fleeting, though, because Sonic doesn’t like to dwell on negativity. He’s quick to bounce back, reminding himself that no one can match his charm.
When his jealousy peaks, he doubles down on his efforts to impress you. He’ll drag you on adventures, race you to the nearest horizon, and show off every trick in his arsenal. Sonic wants to be the one who keeps you smiling, even if it means pushing himself a little harder to outshine everyone else.
Shadow:
Shadow’s jealousy is a bit more on the intense side. He’s not one to wear his emotions on his sleeve, far from it, but he lets himself relax more around you, he valies you for that.
He notices everything, the way someone’s eyes linger on you, the subtle changes in their tone, and how easily they make you laugh. Shadow doesn’t say anything at first, but his silence speaks volumes. His eyes narrow, his body language stiffens, and the air around him grows thick with tension.
"Do you enjoy their company?" he asks you one evening, his tone calm but icy. It’s not an accusation, but the question seemed like a trap.
If you assure him that you’re just being polite or that it’s nothing serious, Shadow nods, but the thought lingers in his mind. He doesn’t understand why it bothers him so much, why the thought of others spending more time with you makes him ache.
Shadow isn’t one to act out of insecurity, but jealousy brings out a possessive streak he can’t quite control. He’s not above making his presence known, standing just a little too close to you when someone else is around or fixing them with a withering glare that sends them running.
"0You don’t need them," he tells you firmly, his voice low. "You have me."
Shadow’s jealousy stems from his fear of losing the one person who makes him feel "human",(mobian? Idfk anymore man :(.) grounded. He doesn’t want to admit it, but he worries that someone else might give you something he can’t. After all, he’s not the most expressive or affectionate person, and sometimes he wonders if that’s enough for you.
If you reassure him, Shadow relaxes, his usually stone cold exterior softening. "I don’t want to lose you," he admits quietly, almost ashamed of his own weakness.
While Shadow tries to keep his jealousy in check, it occasionally slips out in subtle ways.
Silver:
Silver is naturally anxious, and jealousy only amplifies that side of him. He’s not used to navigating these kinds of emotions, so when he sees someone else getting a little too friendly with you, he doesn’t know how to handle it.
At first, Silver tries to ignore it, convincing himself that he’s overreacting. "They’re just being nice," he tells himself, but the knot in his stomach says otherwise. He starts overthinking everything, what if they’re better for you? What if you realize he’s not enough?
You notice how quiet he gets, his usual bright demeanor overshadowed by uncertainty. When you ask him what’s wrong, he hesitates before blurting out, "Do you like them more than me?"
Silver immediately regrets his words, his cheeks flushing with embarrassment. "Sorry, I didn’t mean to-! I just... I don’t want to lose you."
His honesty is endearing, even if his jealousy is a little misplaced. Silver doesn’t want to control you or keep you from talking to others, but he can’t help feeling like he has to prove himself.
If his jealousy gets the better of him, Silver might become a bit clingy, always wanting to be by your side. "Can I stay with you for a bit?" he asks, his voice soft and hopeful.
Silver’s jealousy isn’t rooted in possessiveness but in his fear of not being good enough. He looks up to you, admires you, and sometimes he wonders what you see in him. But your reassurance means the world to him.
"You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me," Silver says one day. "I just want to make sure I’m the best for you, too."
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wisecura · 20 days ago
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Sheets
megumi fushiguro x fem-reader
p.1
p.10  ( ⸝⸝꩜ ᯅ ꩜⸝⸝;) p.12 (getting close to the end)
p.11
AN: very very very sorry for the late post! I do have a clear ending in mind for this (typed up my outlines and everything) and I'm hoping to wrap it up soon--thank you for your love and support! and my cute anons asking for updates. it really had been encouraging even when i'm not feeling great. I hope this chapter is up to par, been feeing a bit of a block and a bit shy with posting. sometimes I focus on the negative and forget i'm doing this as a hobby. (get a bit self conscious and wonder if i'm even good at writing haha) so thank you again for the love and support. If this sounds disorganized please tolerate me ♥️ i'm ranting now, so please--
warnings: this story may cover sensitive and uncomfortable topics. please read at your own risk, violence, lashings, blood, mental breakdowns, yandere, obsessive behavior, possessiveness, mommy kinks, mommy issues, arranged marriages, forced marriages, angst, eventual smut, clan politics, age gap (5 years from meg, and a little over 10 with toji), toji aint the best dad, mentions of child abuse, slowww build.
Short summary: Your arranged marriage to Toji Fushiguro had been sudden and unexpected, but now you found yourself living under his roof alongside your moody stepson. Your only directive from your clan head before moving in was clear: keep a close eye on Toji, the notorious Sorcerer Killer, and his son, a potential sorcerer prodigy.
anons, anons, anons (if i say it three times will you appear?♥️)
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Your eyes locked onto it immediately.
He’d forgotten his school bag at home, which was so uncharacteristic for the always-on-top-of-it Megumi. The fact that he's gone off without it was a surprise in and of itself.
And being the good, responsible figure you were, you decided you needed to get it back to him. Sure, you could’ve just texted him, but the nagging curiosity ate away in the back of your mind.
You deserved that much…right? 
Over the past few years, both you and Megumi had grown, though in ways that felt fundamentally different. It seemed like only yesterday when you towered over him by at least a foot, but now, at 22, standing on the edge of what felt like both everything and nothing, you began to pick up on more around you. Each time he came back, it was as though he had learned something new, gained some insight or skill that added to the ever-growing distance between the person he was and the person he was becoming.
And with those changes came those unwelcome feelings that gnawed at the back of your mind. Jealousy—Admiration. A sense of responsibility that weighed heavier than it had any right to. Overwhelming affection that felt almost instinctive, but no less unsettling. A little too...much for deep thought. And astonishment at the person who regularly sat in front of you at the dinner table—so far removed from the boy you once knew. 
Meanwhile, your life felt stuck in place, confined to the monotony of daily errands and long hours indoors. Days blurred together, weeks slipped by unnoticed, and yet that nagging ache in the back of your mind never left. So desperate to go off the beaten path. 
And the trail leading to Jujutsu High was gorgeous. Thick trees lined the path, their leafy branches casting intricate shadows on the pavement. The sunlight peeked through in golden streaks, making the entire scene feel almost surreal. The warmth on your face nearly euphoric. You’d only ever seen pictures of this place when you looked it up online, but they didn’t do it justice. 
“Woah. And who might you be?” 
The sudden voice shattered your focus, making you spin around so fast you nearly lost your footing. Your pulse spiked, heart pounding in your chest as you stumbled back a step, clutching the two bags in your hands like a damn lifeline. For a brief moment, the world around you blurred, leaving only a splotch of leaves in your line of sight.
Your gaze snapped to a face far too close for comfort—definitely too close.
White, unruly hair, gleamed in the sunlight, but it was his eyes, so unnervingly blue, that froze you in place. He was undeniably handsome. But the smirk that graced his face and the look in his eye as his head tilted slightly, was unnerving. As if you were some curious puzzle he’d stumbled upon.
“Lost?” he asked, his tone light and teasing, but there was an undeniable weight in his presence that sent a shiver down your spine. Then it hit you—the suffocating wave of cursed energy radiating off him. It was staggering, an oppressive force pressing down on your chest and making it hard to breathe. How had you not felt it before? It rolled off him in unrelenting waves, so overwhelming it left you momentarily speechless, rooted to the spot.
“What? You shy?”
His voice broke the silence, dripping with that insufferable amusement. He was just as bad as Toji it seemed. He tilted his head a bit more, his eyes glinting mischievously, as if your reaction was the highlight of his day. Your irritation felt obvious, but it was quickly drowned out by the lingering unease that his cursed energy evoked. Stranger danger. stranger danger.
You instinctively stepped back, trying to create some distance, but he didn’t budge. If anything, he leaned in closer, his presence invading your space with an air of lazy confidence, like he had all the time in the world to unravel whatever it was he found so intriguing about you.
You hadn’t even realized you were staring until he spoke again, the lilt in his tone making your cheeks heat with something closer to indignation. Still, you weren’t about to be rude—not with someone who exudes this kind of power. Not when he was the only one walking down this path with you. Not another soul in sight.
“Sorry,” your voice wavering slightly. “Do you… work here?” The hesitation in your tone was unmistakable, and his response was immediate—a wide grin stretching across his face. Fitting.
“That depends… who’s asking?” 
Before you could respond, your name rang out, a deep voice, heavy and familiar, cutting through the air from behind you. The grin faltered on the man’s face for the briefest of moments, replaced by a flicker of surprise as his eyes shifted past you to the source. You turned instinctively, already recognizing who it belonged to, even before you saw him.
Of course, it was Megumi.
“What’re you doing here?” His voice was blunt, almost tense, as he closed the distance between you in a few long, purposeful strides. There was no warmth, no casual greeting—just that demanding tone that made your chest tighten.
Why did he look so upset?
Oh, did you... mess up?
You barely had a chance to open your mouth before he was standing right in front of you, his hands gripping your shoulders firmly. His eyes scanned over you as if he was checking for some kind of damage you hadn’t even realized might be there.
“You... left your bag at home,” you voice was soft, quiet. He didn't seem to acknowledge your words as you attempt to hold up the bag. Proof of your...innocence? Why would you even need a reason to be here? You weren't doing anything wrong.
His expression never wavered, the clench of his jaw making it clear that your answer hadn’t fully soothed whatever was bothering him. His grip on your shoulders softened slightly, though he gave them a small squeeze, almost reassuring. But his attention shifted.
Gaze moving past you, and you felt the change immediately. His posture stiffened, his whole demeanor shifting into something colder, more guarded. Without a word, he stepped in front of you, his body casually yet deliberately placing itself between you and the white-haired man. His shoulders completely blocking you from view. The movement was subtle, but the message was clear. Just how did Megumi know a man like this?
“Gojo-sensei,” —Ah.
“What’re you doing here? I thought you were on a mission.”
The man—Gojo—let out a heavily dramatic sigh, looking completely unbothered by Megumi’s tone. “Finished early,” he replied with a casual shrug, hands crossing behind his head, far too relaxed. “But who’s this you’re hiding?”
His voice gave you chills, and you shifted uncomfortably, not able to see him, but no doubt that creepy grin was still slapped across his face. Gojo didn’t wait for an answer. He leaned slightly, trying to catch a better look at you around Megumi’s frame. “She’s not your girlfriend, is she?”
“No,” Megumi shot back, the word flat and final, his tone leaving no room for interpretation. Gojo raised his hands in mock surrender.
“Alright, alright. Touchy, huh?” His voice was playful, almost sing-song, but the way his gaze lingered on you felt a little too probing, a little too long for comfort had Megumi clenching his fists.
You swallowed hard, heat rising to your cheeks. Whether it was from embarrassment, unease, or the palpable tension between him and Megumi, you couldn’t quite tell. You hadn’t interacted with Gojo much, but the way Megumi’s entire presence had shifted told you everything you needed to know—Gojo wasn’t exactly a welcome sight. Whatever lightness existed in the air before was gone, replaced by an invisible but tangible weight pressing between the three of you.
Gojo might not have been dangerous, but he definitely gave the impression of someone who liked to push boundaries just to see how far he could go. His teasing nature seemed to thrive on reactions, and you could tell Megumi wasn’t in the mood to indulge him.
A stray thought crept into your mind....maybe Megumi had never mentioned you to anyone here... The idea hit harder than you expected, a dull ache settling in your chest. You banished it before it could take root—now wasn’t the time.
“Yo! There you guys are!”
A bright and cheery voice shattered the lingering tension. You turned to see a pink-haired boy jogging toward the group, a huge grin plastered across his face. His eyes were wide and warm, his energy unmistakable—this had to be the friend from the photo Megumi sent. There was something undeniably magnetic about him, a friendliness so genuine it seemed to pour off him in waves, reminding you immediately of an overexcited puppy.
Megumi stiffened beside you, muttering something under his breath you couldn’t quite catch before reluctantly offering a grumbled greeting. Yuji skidded to a stop just in front of you, planting his hands on his knees as he caught his breath. He straightened quickly, his grin softening into something almost shy when his eyes landed on you.
“Oh, hi!” he said, a light blush creeping onto his cheeks. He rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly, his smile still firmly in place. “Sorry—I’m Yuji Itadori! You must be… uh…” His voice trailed off as his brow furrowed, the wheels in his head clearly turning as he tried to piece together who you might be.
Megumi let out a long sigh, his irritation practically radiating off him. “She’s with me,” he said flatly, stepping just slightly closer to you, his tone making it clear he wasn’t in the mood for explanations.
You couldn’t help but smile at him, his presence a much needed distraction. “Nice to meet you, Yuji,” you said warmly. Yuji’s face lit up even more at your friendly response. “Wow, Fushiguro never said anything about—”THWACK!
Before he could finish, Megumi stepped forward and smacked Yuji on the back of the head with a loud thunk that echoed down the trail, making you jump.
“Megumi!” surprise flooding your tone, trying to sound somewhat scolding. This had to be a first. You'd never seen Megumi so...
Yuji barely flinched, rubbing the back of his head for a second before laughing. “Jeez, Fushiguro! What’s with you today?” His grin stayed intact, though you couldn’t miss the slight wince that suggested the hit hadn’t exactly been gentle.
He raised his hands in mock surrender, still chuckling. “It’s fine! I’ve got an extra-thick skull anyway,” he added with a playful wink in your direction. You noticed Megumi seemed even more frustrated with the additional member, but he didn't comment on it. You wondered how long he'd hold out until he just left.
“Well, Megumi,” Gojo emphasized the name with a teasing lilt, his eyes flicking to you as if testing the waters. “This is…interesting. Didn’t mention you’d have company today.”
Megumi’s scowl deepened, his eyes narrowing slightly. “It’s none of your business,” he shot back without hesitation. He hadn't even known you were coming. A mistake on your part obviously.
“Whoa, Fushiguro, didn’t know you were the overprotective type,” Yuji joked, though his curiosity was evident beneath the teasing tone.
Gojo leaned slightly. "She a friend or something?"
This all but confirmed your earlier suspicions. Megumi doesn't talk about you. You drew in a breath. “I’m his—” 
Megumi’s hand shot out, his grip firm but not harsh as it wrapped around your wrist. “We’re done here,” he muttered, his tone low and decisive. Without sparing a glance back, he began steering you away with purposeful steps, leaving no room for protest.
“Wait—what?” Yuji’s voice followed after you, completely baffled. But neither tried to stop him. Gojo chuckled quietly and gave a lazy wave. “See you around… whoever you are,” he called out, lighthearted, his eyes trailing you.
Why the hell was he so curious about you.
Megumi kept his grip on your wrist, practically dragging you along until the two of you reached a more private spot—a quiet little area tucked beneath an overgrowth of trees. Thick bushes surrounded the bench, adding a sense of seclusion that felt both calming and suffocating all at once. You recognized the place from earlier on your walk. It wasn’t far from the front entrance, and the realization sent a small pang through your chest. How many times would he make it obvious he didn't want you here until you'd get it? The self conscious part of you brain was screaming at you. feeling oddly shy with being here.
You stole a glance at him, catching sight of his face. His jaw, clenched, his gaze sharp and tunneled, like he was too lost in his own frustration to notice anything else. The tension in his features was unmistakable, and that tightness in your gut only grew.
When he finally let go of your wrist, you felt the cool air replace the warmth of his touch, though it didn’t ease the knot forming in your stomach. He sighed, his shoulders sinking slightly as some of the tension eased from his posture.
“What’re you doing here?” his voice, low but softer than before.
You could easily cry. Despite being the older one here, you felt more like a scolded toddler, small and out of place. But when your eyes met his, something shifted. The hard glare he’d been wearing was gone, replaced by a calmer expression, maybe even a little tired. His hands moved to his face, rubbing across his eyes as if trying to wipe away the remnants of his frustration.
You really needed to get ahold of yourself. Since when did it matter if he wanted you there? You were there to drop off something he forgot. Maybe it was just the embarrassment teens get when their overly affectionate parent comes to dote on them in front of their friends. Maybe theyd tease him about this later....
When he looked at you again, there was that particular softness in his gaze, the kind that made your chest ache. Your thoughts immediately cleared. Maybe he wasn't so upset with you...
“You embarrassed of me?” you joked weakly, forcing out a laugh that didn’t quite land. You prayed the faint hurt in your tone wasn’t as obvious as it felt.
Megumi’s eyes widened, caught off guard. Like he hadn't anticipated you actually being hurt by his actions. He could sense the tension in your voice, much like how you could sense his. He stared at you for what felt like forever, his mouth opening slightly as though he wanted to respond, only to close again as the words faltered. His head tilted just a fraction, his brows furrowing in thought, like he was scrambling for an excuse but coming up empty. The silence stretched between you, and for a moment, it seemed like he wasn’t sure what to say—or if he even could.
You chuckled, stepping forward to pinch his cheek lightly. “Relax,” you teased, quickly shoving down the lingering sting of your own feelings as you swung the strap off your shoulder and held the bag out to him. He wasn't mad at you. “I told you—I brought your bag. How can someone as responsible as you forget something like this, hmm?”
For a moment, Megumi just stared at the bag, like he couldn’t quite believe you’d gone out of your way for something so trivial. Slowly, he reached out to take it, his fingers brushing yours in the process. The brief contact wasn’t much, but you caught the faintest flush creeping into his cheeks.
“Thanks… mom,” he muttered, his voice quieter than usual, almost shy.
He eyed the second bag slung around your shoulder.
"Oh! And this is for you." He took the bag quizzically, peeking inside only for his eyes to light up. "Thought I'd at least bring your favorite." The packed dinner was a good choice. The awkward tension from earlier melted away as a warm smile spread across his face.
You couldn’t help but laugh softly at how cute he was, the tense atmosphere already fading away. A small lull settled between you, the kind of silence that felt comfortable rather than strained. The overgrown trees swayed gently overhead, their leaves whispered softly in the breeze, wrapping the moment in an almost serene stillness. It was starting to get cold out. Soon enough, he would be due for another birthday. Yours had already passed a few weeks back.
Without warning, Megumi stepped forward, pulling you into a tight hug. His arms wrapped securely around you, holding you close as his chin came to rest lightly on top of your head. The embrace was firm, not overbearing, and for a moment, you froze in surprise before leaning into it. He was always one for affectionate gestures... but....
“You should head back,” he said quietly, though there was a faint reluctance in his tone that made you nearly hesitate. You didnt want to leave just yet.
You nodded, your hands brushing his arms briefly before you pulled back. “Alright,” you replied softly, offering him another small smile before turning to leave.
As you walked back toward the path, you spotted Gojo and Yuji nearby, standing a little too still to pass as innocent. You were sure they were supposed to have left already, but there they were—watching. Not that you had anything you were particularly secretive about.
But Yuji’s gaze seemed to dart to anywhere but you, his hands shoved deep into his pockets, while Gojo leaned casually against a tree, the ever-present grin on his face somehow managing to look even more smug.
The second your eyes met theirs, Yuji’s face flushed bright red. He muttered something under his breath, quickly averting his gaze as though he could disappear by sheer will. Gojo, on the other hand, stood there shamelessly. All cocky and arrogant. Immediately irritating you again.
Megumi stepped out from behind you, their eyes shifting over immediately. Gojo’s grin turned absolutely wicked, his quirked brow seeming ready to tease him endlessly. Yuji’s mouth twitched, as though he was trying—and failing—not to laugh, his wide eyes flicking between the two of you. 
Megumi, however, barely acknowledged them. He strode past you without a word, but as he did, you felt the faintest brush of his hand against your back. The touch was light, almost imperceptible, but deliberate enough to send a jolt through you. Your cheeks warmed instantly, and before you could even process the moment, Gojo gave an exaggerated cough. 
By the time Megumi reached their sides, Gojo and Yuji were all over him, poking his cheeks and teasing him relentlessly. You couldn’t help but wonder if they’d ever let him live down whatever they thought they’d seen. For someone as stoic as Megumi, seeing him soften must’ve been quite the sight for them.
You sighed quietly, feeling a little secondhand embarrassment for him.
The walk home was pretty silent.
It was hard to find much to do when the house was as silent as it was. Time seemed to crawl as you went through the motions of your routine, everything blurring together in the same, boring monotony.
You and Megumi exchanged texts here and there, but as always, he was evasive about certain topics. He avoided talking about his friends, that teacher, and especially his missions. No matter how many ways you tried to bring it up, he always managed to steer the conversation elsewhere.
But he seemed more comfortable sharing through photos—pictures of the meals he was eating, scenic views, and even the occasional selfie with a classmate or two. It seemed he was trying to include you more in his day to day life, maybe sensing your growing urge for something different. You couldn’t help but feel a little guilty about it.
He wasn’t supposed to be worrying about you like this—but when had Megumi ever not been thoughtful when it came to you?
He was always helping around the house, bringing home things you needed. He’d carry the heavier bags without being asked, and when he was home, he never went out much. Instead, he’d linger in your presence, watching the same TV shows you liked, or even sitting in complete silence, or even sun napping on the couch. A second shadow.
And if you were forced to admit it, he made the loneliness and monotony a lot easier to bear. His presence had a way of filling the empty spaces, making the house feel less like a silent box and more like a home.
When it came to you, Megumi seemed to have a sixth sense. He was always away at school when you were called out to your clan house, yet, without fail, he’d send you a message the second you got back, asking how you were. He always seemed to know when you were stressed or needed something—sometimes even before you realized it yourself. Megumi wasn’t just thoughtful. No, he was in tune with you in a way that felt almost uncanny.
And now that he was older… you couldn’t help but wonder. Did he still harbor that same puppy crush he had when he was younger? The thought made your head spin. Was he still seeing you in that light, or had it faded? He’d never fully confirmed it back then, never said anything outright. But he’d always been affectionate—hadn’t he?
Wasn’t he always like that? 
And yet… how would you feel about that?
No.
These weren’t the right questions to be asking. You still had a place here. You were still his stepmother. These weren’t the thoughts you should even be entertaining, not for a second. But the thought made you freeze in your tracks, the shirt you were folding suddenly feeling heavier in your hands. It was nearing his graduation—just a week away—and you didn't have the faintest idea what came after.
Would he be moving out? Would he stay home for a while to plan his next steps? Would he be doing Jujutsu work? 
And then there was the question you didn’t want to ask, the one that made your stomach twist. Would you still be allowed to stay here? Or would your clan come calling, pulling you out of the life you’d carefully built over the years? The main reason for you being here was Megumi and Toji. Forming those relationships and feeding small bits of information. But if neither of them were even going to be home....
No, surely they wouldn’t. Not after all this time. If they were going to do that, they would’ve already done it… wouldn’t they? Surely....They hadn't mentioned it before at least.
Toji had come home briefly the week before Megumi’s graduation, but it didn’t take long to learn he’d already taken on yet another mission. Despite the two of you growing closer over time, it never seemed to slow him down when it came to picking up those lengthy assignments that kept him away for days at a time.
This time was no different. He mentioned it was a high-profile case, one with the potential to drag on longer than expected. “Two weeks minimum,” and he wouldn’t be back in between.
It wasn’t anything new. Toji’s comings and goings had always been unpredictable, and you’d grown used to the empty spaces he left behind. But something about this mission left you uneasy. 
But for now, all you could do was wait.
come home
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suugarbabe · 5 months ago
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I had just gotten the cutest fluffiest tooth rotting sweet idea for a fanfic I've ever gotten.
You know how there is a type of color blindness called red green color blind? It's basically green turns to yellow and red to brown and well fellow and blue stay the same.
So what if reader is red green color blind and her favorite color is blue since it's the only special color she can see and since Theo's eyes are blue when she sees his eyes she gets really excited, wi excited that she just grabs Theo's face so she can get a better look.
I feel like the reader need to have a cherry and bubbly personality because she needs to be very very clueless to just grab someone's face because of how exited she would get.
i've quite literally been obsessed with this ask since you've sent it, and i've gone back and forth on how to write it completely, then went through a little bit of writers block altogether so hopefully i do this justice and close to how you might have envisioned it.
You were really young when it happened, the accident that caused it. Mum was proficient in potions, and you just wanted to be just like her. But a four year old really shouldn't have been messing with her things. It all happened so fast, your little mind just thought you were playing, copying what you've seen her do. Throwing a little of this and a little of that in the cauldron, pouring the pretty blue liquid inside. You had picked it because it was your favorite color, which, looking back seems incredibly ironic.
The explosion was quick but it shook your entire house. Your parents had come rushing in, only to find you sitting up against the far wall, eyebrows gone and lower lip quivering. It has taken about six months before anyone was aware of what it did to you. You were so young and the experience was, well, pretty traumatic so you never really said anything about the changes.
Everyone thought you consistently picked the blue things because it was your favorite color. And while that was slightly true, it was also the only color you were able to see completely. You could occasionally see very dull shades of other colors, extremely muted or like you were seeing them through a layer of grey tissue paper.
Your parents never made too big of a deal out of the situation, instead just teaching you how to by hyper vigilant for specific details you could notice to help you out. Like the difference in how a ruby felt to an emerald, or how gum root smelled versus hickory drip. So overall you had learned to manage. And truly you didn't think you were missing out on much.
In your opinion all of the best things were blue. The ocean on a bright summers day, the sky on a crisp fall morning, the shine on a sapphire, and of course, your Ravenclaw robes. Your 'condition' was spread throughout the school by Christmas holiday your first year. It wasn't something you kept a secret, but it also wasn't something you spread around like you'd won the quidditch world cup.
It didn't bother you that people knew, but it did change how some people saw you. When you were younger, they tried to tease you, tried to call you a freak, tell you that you wouldn't amount to much as "you'd never be successful with such a limitation." It's a wonder what a loving family and supportive friends can do to keep one grounded and happy. As despite all those negative words in your early years, you were still so bright and bubbly.
You had gotten used to how you viewed things a long time ago, but that didn't stop you from being marveled at new discoveries. Which is what had you following a very tall and lanky Slytherin boy down the hall. You had noticed it by accident, as he passed you in the hall. You knew who he was, were well aware of his and his little gang's reputation. But you liked to form your own opinions from experience, and you hadn't quite interacted with this particular member yet.
Your friends had called after you, but after seeing the determined pep in your step had just settled for following. When you had finally caught up to him you wrapped your arms around his bicep, spinning him round to face you. "What the-," he was cut off by your hands grabbing hold of either side of his face, delicate thumbs resting on his sharp cheek bones to hold him still.
"Merlin, Theo, your eyes they're...gods they're like water colors." Theo was thoroughly caught off guard. Not only by the pretty girl holding his face but by the words coming from her mouth. "Oh sweet Rowena, they've just shifted, what are you thinking about?" He did his best not to stutter, "Erm, I...," you could feel his cheeks heat beneath your palm and your smile was instant, "I've not heard that description before. Usually they just say like the ocean or the sky or whatever."
Your thumbs rubbed gently on the apples of his cheeks. "Oh, they're much more than that. They're like...when you first dip your brush into the prettiest pallet after a dip in the water, then when you make the first brushstroke, and the color spreads so perfectly, shifting hues of blue. That's them...your eyes."
No sooner had you finished your explanation were his lips on yours. It was unexpected, catching you off guard but not unpleasantly. His mouth slotted against yours seemingly effortlessly, your hands slipping form his cheeks to loop around his neck and his hands found solace on your waist. His eyes are what drew you in but his lips, merlin you could get used to those.
"Oi, Nott. Who're ya-," The interruption caused the two of you to break apart abruptly, you wiping your slightly swollen lips and straightening where Theo was gripping your skirt. "Oh, no fucking way," Enzo Berkshire's voice sounded as smug as the look on his face. Theo simply threw up his middle finger at the boy before turning to you, small grin on his face.
"Erm, sorry for bombarding you like that its just-," You shook your head, cutting him off, "S'okay." Theo's grin grew two times, "Can I see you this weekend? Coming to the Slytherin party?" You nodded, biting your bottom lip to try and contain your growing smile. Theo placed a kiss on your forehead before looking you in your eyes, more so so you could see his one last time. Then with a wink, he turned and ran to catch up with his friend.
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the-s1lly-corner · 10 months ago
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Hi!! this is my first time requesting anything but i was wondering if you could do creepypasta boys were you kiss / compliment there scars!
Kissing their scars (various crp)
Bro I scratched my skin right next to this burn last week and it HURTS so bad
Characters: Jeff the Killer, Ticci Toby, Eyeless Jack
Notes: Reader is GN, fluff, these boys need help
CWs: talks of violence in.. well all of them, mentioned of self harm in Jeff's part
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Jeff
You decide to kiss the gashes in his cheeks, the ones that he carved.. he never really viewed them as anything very negative; sure it reminds him of the night he killed his entire gamily.. a fact he has a very wishy washy feeling of guilt over depending on the day
At first he thinks you're trying to kiss his cheeks but you make it very clear what you're trying to do when you begin to compliment them- they've healed so well since theyve been put there
Between the three he tries to play it off the most, of course it looks nice- they make him beautiful, and he always will be beautiful! What are you talking about reader?
Hes not at all willing to be vulnerable around you, it doesnt matter how long you two know each other or how close you get he never.. really let's himself just be in his feelings around others
But just know that hes going to be sitting in bed tonight looking up at the ceiling replaying what you've said and going back over the events that lead him here- rare moment of self reflection essentially
But to your face.. hes just the same as hes always been, even teasing you for having such a huuuge crush on him- bonus if the two of you are already dating
Eyeless Jack
You rarely ever get to see him without the mask, but when you do.. it's best not to do something like this the first time you see his eye sockets- hes very cagey about his face in the first place and hes not quiet ready to handle more attention drawn to it. The first few times it's off it's best to meet it with indifference
But when more time passes, you're more than welcome to test the waters. You already knew Jack had a fair collection of scars, but there was a different feel to the burned and gashed holes where his eyes would have been
He wont let you kiss him, mostly because hes unsure of what exactly the goo was made of, as well as naturally not liking the idea of someone putting their mouth where his eyes just to be- but you're allowed to trace your fingers along the scar tissue
Hes never going to tell you what happened unless theres a reason to, hes very firm when setting this boundary. It's just something that makes him feel.. gross..
He already doesn't talk much but he becomes silent as you trace your fingers and talk to him
He might go back to wearing his mask all the time again for a while but it's not exactly your fault, it was just a huge step- it's okay to back up a bit to process things
Ticci Toby
Due to his CIPA he has a bit of a disconnect between him and his injuries, scars included. He didnt really feel them when they were being made, sure he may have felt some pressure depending on what caused it but other than that, nothing really.. for a lot of them he doesnt have much thoughts- neither good nor bad
The only ones that really make him feel something are the ones he sustained from the crash- they're scattered across his body...
If you kissed or complimented any other scar he would tease you for being a little "weird", even making it a game to guess where he got the current scar from- with outlandish answers of course
But the second you reach one of /those/ scars the fun is immediately cut, you can tell theres something off
Similar to Jack, its something that has to be eased into due to the weight associated with the injuries. It's not the fact that it hurt when he got them but they serve as a reminder of what he lost
The only one who really tries to change the subject, perhaps by asking if you have any scars or markings on your body or simply changing the subject all together
Probably the only one who wouldn't want to be complimented due to the nature of some of his scars
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lena-in-a-red-dress · 5 months ago
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Musician Age Gap AU Pt 12
Lena's entire body seems to buzz as they hover in the wings offstage, waiting for the cue to proceed. She bounces on the balls of her feet, fingers twisting together with uncharacteristic nerves, completely unlike the staid presence she'd run into under the National City arena.
"You okay?" she asks hesitantly.
"I've never shared new music live before," Lena confesses. "What if they hate it?"
"Nah," Kara dismisses. She smiles. "They'll love it, cuz its you."
If nothing else, the novelty-- the privilege-- of witnessing a live performance of a never-before-heard song would ease any negativity the song itself might earn down the line. Even Kara herself hasn't had a chance to hear it.
The nearest stagehand motions one minute to go. Finally, Lena stills, taking a moment to breathe deep.
"You've got this," Kara promises, before stepping away.
The lights dim, then go out entirely as the pre-show music quiets. In its place lifts a deafening roar from the crowd. Its so dark Kara doesn't see Lena move into position. One minute she's there, and the next an overhead spotlight snaps on to illuminate Lena centerstage, arm stretched high.
She waits for the din to just start to fall away, and then she's off without a single shred of her anxiety from just moments before. Her movements are strong and confident as she strides across the stage, playing to the crowd in just the right way to get them pumped and engaged for the next two hours.
Her first song is the same from the National City show, as is the second, and third. Kara doubts anything has changed, no doubt so rehearsed Lena could do it all in her sleep, singing included. But watching it again feels an all new experience.
It steals her breath away, and she only comes back to herself when Lena slows, reaching for a mic stand. This is it.
"I know you guys came here prepared to sing along with every word," Lena begins, even her speaking voice rich like velvet. "Which I'm sure you can sing better than I can at this point."
She earns a raucous burst of laughter, and prompts a giggle from Lena.
"But I'm afraid this next one is going to be all me... cuz I've a little something new for you tonight."
Kara thinks she might have lost her hearing, ears ringing in the answering explosion of cheers. Lena patiently waits for the opening to continue, grinning all the way.
"It's pretty self-explanatory once you hear it, but here's the thing: you know that ex who keeps reaching out? Believe it or not, I have one."
Another round of laughter, and a little bit of hollering.
"I thought I blocked him on everything, but I must have missed something, because guess what I got?" Lena pauses for comedic effect. "A cashapp payment for three dollars and thirty three cents."
Laughter fills the arena, and Lena joins with a delighted giggle. "The note of course asked me to call him, but... I don't know. What do you think?"
Cries of No! and Don't do it! echoed from various areas of the audience, and Lena nods.
"I think we're on the same page then. Three dollars and thirty three cents doesn't earn you a phone call..." Lena leans in close to the microphone. "But it might just earn you a song."
The audience laps it up, eliciting even more whooping cheers. Lena nods, half to herself, and half to the audience.
"Let's hit it!"
As soon as the music starts, Lena shifts effortlessly back into performance mode. Kara listens, bopping along to the bouncing beat and playful lyrics. Playful but scathing, it turns out, listing off all the reasons this mysterious ex will never see her again.
From her spot in the wings, Kara sees the crowd dancing, not singing but cheering and spinning and bouncing and absorbing it all with reckless abandon. She registers Lillian's approach beside her, but doesn't so much as glance at her. Whatever Lillian thought about Lena's plan, it was working. Tomorrow, all the world would care about is getting their ears on this new song-- and they would love it.
"You have no idea the bullet she just dodged for you."
Kara does look over at that. Her brow furrows sharply, and Lillian smirks as she watches her daughter perform.
"This time tomorrow, the world is going to be so busy sleuthing out which of her ex's this song is about, they won't even remember your name."
Onstage, Lena finishes her song with a boisterous laugh, letting the fresh cheers roll over her. Lillian turns to Kara, leaning in close.
"So when you ultimately decide this fantasy isn't for you, remember that a twenty four year old is the reason you'll still have a real life to go back to."
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thetarotwitch111 · 6 months ago
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How people are perceiving you right now? - Pick a card purple pokemon
Since i absolutely love pokemon I picked three purple ones, and just like choosing your starter, you’ll pick one to uncover how people are seeing you right now. So grab your Poké Balls, dust off that old Game Boy, and let’s see what your chosen Pokémon reveals about you.
✨I hope this reading brings you some clarity and guidance. If it resonated with you, I’d love to hear about it!
✨ And if you’re looking for something more personal, I also do individual readings—just DM me anytime or check my ko-fi
🌟TIP JAR🌟
Breathe, clean your thoughts and ask your guides and the Universe lead you to the message that’s meant for you.
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Let’s get into your reading!
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💜 1. Gengar
They’re noticing this big shift in you. You’re really starting to let go of things that used to hold you down, and that’s pretty powerful. It’s almost like you’ve decided, “I don’t need to control everything,” and that’s making you come across as way more open and chill. People can see that you’re getting better at going with the flow, even if it’s a little scary sometimes. But they also see that you’re super careful with your decisions. You’re not the type to just jump into something without thinking it through. You’re weighing all your options, and while that might make you seem a little stuck, it’s really just you being smart about where you’re headed next. And sure, they might pick up on the fact that you’re dealing with some tough stuff (maybe some temptations or situations that feel a bit restrictive). But what they really admire is how you’re not letting that stop you. You’re determined to break free from anything that doesn’t feel right, and that’s pretty inspiring.
The good things they see in you:
First off, they totally admire your resilience. You’ve been through some rough times, but you always manage to come out the other side even stronger. It’s like no matter what life throws at you, you’re not just surviving—you’re thriving. And people really notice that strength in you.
They also love your independence and this amazing ability to make choices that are totally in line with who you are. Even if that means you’re taking a path that others don’t quite get, they respect that you’re doing what feels right for you. You might seem a little cautious in relationships, but that’s just because you’re making sure everything aligns with your true self. People really respect that about you.
Witch’s advice:
You’re in this awesome phase of letting go and embracing change, so let’s boost that energy with some crystals. Grab a smoky quartz, cause it’s perfect for helping you release anything that’s no longer serving you. Think of it as a little nudge from the universe to let go of the old and welcome the new. And then there’s labradorite, which is all about transformation.
For herbs, sage is your best friend right now. It’s amazing for clearing out any negative or stuck energy around you. Pair it with lavender, which is super calming and will help you feel more at peace, especially when things get a little overwhelming.
And because we all need a bit of comfort, let’s talk tea. A blend of peppermint and chamomile is just what you need. The peppermint will help you think clearly and its perfect for those moments when you’re at a crossroads. And the chamomile will calm your nerves and help you relax about the future. If you want an extra boost, add a little lemon balm to the mix. It’s uplifting and will keep your spirits high as you move forward.
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💜 2. Koffing
People see you as someone who’s really starting to break free from some heavy stuff. It’s like they’ve noticed you’ve been through a period where you felt really stuck, maybe even a little trapped, but now they can see you stepping out of that and finding your strength. It’s as if you’ve taken off the blindfold and are beginning to see all the possibilities that are out there for you. There’s a sense of admiration for how you’re learning to navigate through challenges, taking control of your life, and not letting fear or doubt hold you back anymore.
However, there’s also an understanding that you’re still working through some deeper, more personal struggles. People can sense that you’re dealing with things that might still have a hold on you, like old habits or negative thoughts that are tough to shake. But they don’t see this as a weakness; instead, they recognize the strength it takes to confront these inner battles. They know you’re doing your best to overcome them, and they respect the fight you’re putting up to not let those things control you.
At the same time, others notice that you’re someone who avoids unnecessary drama. You’re not one to dive into conflicts or get caught up in petty disputes. Instead, you’re focused on keeping the peace and finding solutions that work for everyone involved. People see you as someone who values harmony and is willing to go the extra mile to make sure things stay calm and balanced, even when it’s not easy. This makes you someone they can rely on to bring a sense of calm and reason into tense situations.
The good things they see in you:
One of the biggest things is your ability to move on from tough situations. They see you as someone who doesn’t let past disappointments or mistakes define you. Instead, you focus on what’s still possible and what you can still achieve. You don’t get down for the negative, but instead, you find a way to keep moving forward, and that’s something people really appreciate.
People also admire how you’re starting to open up more. Maybe you’ve spent some time reflecting and keeping to yourself, but now they see you sharing more of what you’ve learned. You’re willing to let others in, to show your vulnerabilities, and to offer the wisdom you’ve gained from your experiences. This makes you relatable and wise in their eyes, someone who’s been through a lot but is now ready to connect and share with others.
There’s also something about your creativity. Even if you don’t always show it right away, people sense that you have a rich inner world. When you do express your feelings or ideas, it’s something really special that others value. They see you as someone who brings a unique perspective to the table, and they love how you bring your imagination and emotions into everything you do.
Lastly, people respect your thoughtful approach to life. You’re not someone who rushes into things and take your time to consider your options and make sure everything is just right before you move forward. This makes you seem deliberate and careful, which others really appreciate. They know that when you do make a decision, it’s something you’ve really thought through, and that brings a sense of confidence and trust in your choices.
Witch’s advice:
First, consider working with amethyst. This crystal is great for helping you stay clear-headed and keeping any negative energy at bay. It’s also wonderful for breaking free from old patterns and embracing the new opportunities you’re creating for yourself.
For herbs, basil and rosemary would be particularly helpful right now. Basil can bring protection and peace, helping you maintain the calm and balanced environment you’re striving for. Rosemary, on the other hand, is excellent for clarity and focus, giving you the mental boost you need to keep moving forward with confidence.
When it comes to teas, a soothing blend of lemon balm and chamomile would be perfect. Lemon balm is uplifting and can ease any lingering anxiety, while chamomile helps you relax and unwind. Together, they create a comforting, calming vibe that supports your journey toward balance and peace.
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💜 3. Nidoking
People see you as someone who’s in the middle of a pretty intense moment. It’s like they can tell you’ve been thinking a lot about whether to stay in certain situations or move on, but there’s a part of you that’s still holding back. Maybe it’s because you’re not quite ready to let go of something that has been important to you, or perhaps you’re trying to find closure before taking the next big step. Either way, others sense that you’re in a bit of a back-and-forth, trying to figure out where you truly want to be.
They also see that you’re someone who might be feeling a bit stuck right now, like there’s something unfinished in your life. It’s as if you’re so close to reaching a major goal or completing a big chapter, but there’s still a loose end or two that’s keeping you from feeling like you can fully move forward. And you have this drive to wrap things up and reach that sense of completion, but they also understand that it’s not easy when you’re dealing with things that are beyond your control.
At the same time, you’ve got this energy that’s just contagious. You’re curious, excited about new ideas, and you bring that spark wherever you go. Even when life gets tough, they see that you’re still standing strong, ready to take on whatever comes your way. You’re like a warrior who’s been through a lot, but you’ve still got that fire inside you.
The good things they see in you:
One of the first things that stands out is your sense of independence and self-sufficiency. People see you as someone who’s really got it together, someone who’s worked hard to build a life that’s stable and fulfilling. You have this air of confidence and self-reliance that others find incredibly inspiring. They admire how you don’t just sit around waiting for things to happen. You go out and make things happen, and know your worth and you’re not afraid to enjoy the fruits of your labor.
Another thing is that you have a way of bringing your dreams to life that really impresses people. And they also think that you’ve got this deep well of emotion and love, even if you don’t always show it right away. They admire how you’re able to care so deeply and how you’re not afraid to be vulnerable when it really matters. You have this gift for making others feel valued and appreciated, and that’s something they truly treasure in you.
You also lift others up, to bring joy and happiness wherever you go and they see you as someone who can find the good in almost any situation and help others see it too.
Witch’s Advice:
Grab some citrine. It’s the perfect crystal for you. Citrine is all about boosting your confidence and bringing in that joyful, abundant energy that you naturally have. It’s like a little battery for your positivity. And clear quartz is another good one for you; it helps you stay focused and amps up your intentions, making it even easier to manifest all the amazing things you’re working on.
For herbs, rosemary and bay leaves are your go-tos. Rosemary is great for keeping your mind clear and your energy protected, especially when you’re dealing with those frustrating, unfinished things. Bay leaves are awesome for setting intentions and making your wishes come true—write down what you want on a bay leaf, burn it, and let the magic happen.
And let’s not forget about tea! A blend of jasmine and green tea is perfect for you. Jasmine brings in that sweet, loving energy, helping you stay connected to your heart. Green tea keeps you motivated and focused, which is just what you need to keep moving forward. Together, these teas will help you stay balanced and energized, ready to take on anything.
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tls12lessthan3 · 7 days ago
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kim dokja [side character] [self imposed]: protagonists like yoo sangah really are a different type, haha................and me? im just your average salary worker.....well, maybe slightly less than average.........
(is stuck in a self-perception of eternal bystander to his own life. this keeps him rooted in place, unable or unwilling to either desire more for himself or take active steps to achieve it. he avoids forming relationships, putting unnecessary effort in or generally doing anything that could draw attention to himself due to this self-perception as doing so may violate it. a coping strategy from when his mother's book got popular and he became an unwilling main character who desperately wanted to once again be relegated to the background. this is obviously bad for him and both causes an absolutely miserable stasis and prevents him from connecting with others. however, because it forms a core part of his self identity, it will not easily be shaken off)
han sooyoung [villain] [self-imposed]: nyehehehe i love doing evil and murdering puppies #girlboss #villainsontop!!!!..........what, what do you mean how do i feel about almost killing lee gilyoung and shin yoosoung back at the beginning of the scenarios........well, it was what a villain would do, so.......
(views the world as a story almost as much as kim dokja does and adapted her role from 'heroine of a trashy power fantasy novel' to 'villain of an extremely different trashy power fantasy novel' when the world changed in order to cope. genuinely likes being a bit chunni and cackling about her evil schemes but neutral-to-negative on the actual murdering that comes with them, so uses this self-perception to prop herself up and justify her behaviour. invested in keeping it up because it prevents her from having to reflect on her past actions or how she might feel about them - all she has to care about is staying alive and grabbing power wherever necessary. bad for her as it prevents her from any self-reflection and causes guilt to build up without any outlet)
yoo joonghyuk [hero] [externally imposed]:.............................hm.
(stuck in a protagonist role and absolutely despises it. cannot shake it off entirely at any point because it is quite literally what he was made for but constantly yearns to drop the hero worship and just be seen as he is. his protagonist status is tied to his captive nature in the star stream and something he must transcend to finally escape the novel. metaphor for genderisms (subtle))
yoo sangah [heroine] [externally imposed]: i think people are little too kind to me sometimes........but i do try my best to do my best where i can!
(shoved into a heroine role against her will by society around her, a role which coincides with the uncomfortable expectations her parents have put on her as Their Daughter and one that often leaves her feeling isolated. she's aware of how people see her and the issues it causes for her, leaving her frustrated with this role. even when she thinks she's escaped it, she often finds herself shoved back in without warning (e.g. her entire relationship with dokja) and so she dedicates much of her time to tearing down that wall. metaphor for genderisms (overt))
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msxrik · 1 year ago
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I'm in my era so catch the 1st and prob the only Dr.masacrik smut on this app.
Curiosity killed the Cat
Fem!reader x Masacrik
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warnings: this is obv a little fucked up so just a heads up. Heavy bdsm, dubcon, breeding kink, choking, blood, abuse just a little ill make it as mild as i can, sexual content, mimi isn't mentioned as you are in her place atm the ending is rushed its 3am
Sorry for the mistakes i have to go to sleep man
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You woke up in the same room as always, white walls, a small window, dark floor with a grey rug. But something felt different. You turned your head to catch a glimpse of the door when you saw it crooked open your heart skipped a beat. Then you felt an exhale on your head. You totally forgot you fell asleep on his lap while he was stroking your hair. You looked up gently thinking masacrik might be asleep but there he meets your eyes with a smile on his face. You shivered. Were you scared of him? No he never hit you, just ordered you around the house and you do appreciate him for saving your life. Were you manipulated? Probably yes! But you never thought about it. You shoot him a crooked smile as you try to wipe the blush off your face.
-Ah look who finally woke up- he says stroking your head lovingly.
-sorry i fell asleep i should get up-
He shushed you
-come on i have work to do and you are going with me.
He got up and you followed him to his room. After getting a few things he sat down by his desk patting his thigh. You sat on his lap as he rests his chin on the top of your head
-You see i have to focus so don't you move a muscle you hear me?- his tone changed as a shiver runs up your spine you nod your head. In response you get a pleased hum and a kiss on the top of your head.
You tried to relax there not moving as he asked of you. You knew his mood swings but he got so angry at one point you flinched. He froze in response.
- i-im sorry this won't happen again...
- get out. - he said.
Now, getting his negative and abusive attention is better than receiving none. You thought for a second, deciding to disobey him, you were curious. You turned around facing him cupping his face into your hands. As you gave him a small kiss on his lips. Shutting your eyes you felt so much fear but at the same time that familiar heat in your stomach you got every time he called your name or smiled at you.
There was silence, but he didn't kick you out of the room, he didn't hit you, he just looked at you.
-uh.. im- im really sorry i have no idea what's gotten into me im- ill leave now...-you sighed attempting to get off of his lap. You both were together for three months now and it was getting harder for you to please yourself.
-Stay - he slurred out holding you by your waist.
You looked up at his face as he leaned in to kiss you. It was a deep kiss he bit at your lower lip drawing blood from it as it dribbled down your and his chin. You pulled away gasping for air. The eyes you gave him flipped some kind of switch inside him. He got up with you in his arms. It was easy you were nearly half his size. You heard your heartbeat as he threw you onto the bed, he kissed you deeply once again you felt his hand undoing the collar you had on. Then he pulled off your turtle neck leaving you in just a bra skirt and tights.
You reached your hands out for him as he leaned to you kissing your neck leaving bite marks and bruises all over your body. He pulled at your tights ripping them just enough to have a clear way to your crotch then he sat back on the bed. The room was dimmed you just saw his hungry gaze almost eating up your body.
-touch yourself for me.
-h-huh?-you barely stuttered that out he made you feel fear and embarrassment but it was turning you on more.
- I'm not repeating myself. You think that your room is unsupervised? I see you doing it all the time now don't be shy show me.
You sigh in embarrassment as you reach down your crotch sliding your underwear away rubbing your clit with your free hand, your legs shaking already. You slid one finger inside pushing that spot that made you see stars. Then you added another one and as you were about to reach your climax you made the terrible mistake of closing your legs. You felt his hands on your legs in seconds pushing them open, his hard grasp bruising your soft flesh as you gasped
- m-mnh... Im sorry...- you sighed out as you kept pushing your fingers in and out. Just to once again as you were closer then ever get stopped by him
- wait, i want to feel you cum on my dick.
He said that like it was the most casual thing on earth. You took your hand away and felt something cold touching your crotch you looked down to see a pair of scissors you shivered as he cut your underwear out of the way. He wanted to have you in those cute tights but taking the underwear off and putting them back on was too big of a struggle for him. Then you finally felt the thing you wished for for the past 2 months.
He slammed his hips sliding inside you as you moaned arching your back.
-A-agh! Mngh.. im- im cumming, please can i..?
-mmh not yet..
he was so amused with you and the second he felt your walls spasm on his dick he clicked his tongue as his hand went right to your throat squeezing it
-what did i tell you? -he growled but then his expression changed
-did you just tighten up from having my hand around your neck? Disgusting..
he smiled to himself as you clawed at his hand. When he finally let go of your neck you gasped for air
-f-fuck mnh... Please please move faster i need this i-...
He bucked his hips faster he wasn't that happy with how you were acting but he could handle it at that moment..
-im gonna cum inside you you'll never leave me then right?
-i-i would never leave you either w-way.. mnhh..~
He laughed his voice now breaking
-oh you a-are so pathe-etic..
He finally came inside you as you shook through another orgasm. But this wasn't the end of that night... Oh hell no
After you passed out from the rough treatment he gave you and blood loss from the bites and cuts he made he cleaned you up then tuck you into bed hugging you
-Goodnight Ushka~
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This man makes me BLUSH
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mylonelylittlestar · 1 year ago
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My little star
Characters: Xavier Summary: random relationship headcanons with Xavier Warnings: None A/N: I've completely fallen in love with Love and Deepspace, especially with Xavier. It's truly hopeless
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the type of boyfriend to get you matching pyjamas
he gets you so many that they slowly start to replace all of your own
likes to match with you even if you don't live together, so sometimes he just texts you to ask which pyjamas you're wearing so he can change into the matching one after he showered
if you ever gift him slippers, blankets, or pillows, he will keep them forever (even if it's something goofy like those big fluffy bunny slippers)
the best person to ask for good midnight snacks. He can recommend fantastic instant noodles, chips, crackers, or other snacks that are light and won't give you stomach aches late at night or negatively impact your sleep in any other way
very interested in your skincare routine (if you have one) and will try out any mask or cream that you give him
if you come up with a routine for him (a simple one, maybe, like the basic cleanser > toner > moisturizer), he will follow it diligently, dragging himself out of bed before he sleeps every day to do it because you were the one to pick those products for him and he doesn't want to waste that
he feels like it connects you to him, even if your routine is completely different and a bit more complicated
never cries during movies, no matter how sad they might be, but he does (on very rare occasions) get a bit teary-eyed
he will hold you if you cry during a movie, and he would never even think about making fun of you for it
he does secretly think that it's cute that you get so worked up about a movie
can sleep through anything. a bomb could go off in his house and he wouldn't know that it happened until he woke up
has seen every single episode of any shitty sitcom you can think of at least three times because he occasionally watches them while he sleeps
sometimes he quotes them but because he knows each of these shows so well now he always quotes the lesser known scenes and no one gets what he's talking about
you start to understand his references after a while, so sometimes he will quote some obscure scene from a super unpopular sitcom that got cancelled after one season and you're the only one laughing
secretly sneaks to the arcade sometimes to practice the claw machine game because he wants to get you the plushies you don't have yet (and to impress you)
he ends up getting dozens of repeats of plushies that you already own. he collects in a small storage room in his apartment that used to be empty
he ends up giving them away when the collection gets out of control, donating them to a children's hospital nearby
gets all shy when you find out about it, blushing bright red like a tomato (or a wasabi octopus)
knows about every single 24 hour store in the city because of his odd sleeping habits and always knows what to do no matter what time it is
you can't sleep and want to go on a date at 3:27 am? he knows a place
if someone is mean to you he will try his hardest to deescalate the situation, but he's also fully willing to fight the person if that doesn't work
I mean have you read his Anecdotes 2? He doesn't give a fuck. He'd prefer not to fight, sure, but if it's unavoidable? What is he gonna do? Not fight and defend you? Ridiculous.
The fandom has already started turning him into this soft uwu stereotype, but the thing is that that's... just not him? He's sweet and kind, yes, but that's not all he is. He's complicated! He has layers!
if he ever falls asleep during a date he would feel awful about it for days, even if you reassure him that it's fine and that you're glad that he feels safe enough around you to fall asleep
he tries to make it up to you with a different date and he falls asleep again, which starts a vicious, endless cycle
when he finally does get over his guilt it's only because you fall asleep during a date after you had a long day at work
knows when you cheat in kitty cards, but sometimes he just lets you get away with it, especially if he knows you had a stressful day at work. He hopes that the win will cheer you up
his good night kisses are forehead kisses while his good morning kisses are on top of your head if you didn't sleep over or on the cheek if you did
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outofconcheol · 5 months ago
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resonance (scb x f!reader)
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pairing: android!changbin x heiress!reader
genres/aus/rating: romance, angst, smut, arranged marriage, e2l (a little bit), sort of cyberpunk au, 18+
summary: Perfection - an idea that’s been drilled into you from birth. As the sole heir to the empire known as Miroh Labs, you’ve watched technology and tradition collide. However, your family’s latest venture is one that puts your own fate in limbo – ambitiously arranging a marriage to an android of their creation, known as C.H.A.N.G.B.I.N. Grappling with the idea of marrying a machine, you come to realize Changbin is more than a set of intricate codes – the profound depths of his abilities are capable of changing the fabric of society, and you, forever.
warnings: strained parent child relationships (OC's parents are jerks), mentions of past abuse (very mild and not described in detail), class differences, failed past relationship references numerous times, cameos from Chan, Jisung, Jeongin, Hyunjin, and Yuna (ITZY), fair warning OC is a lot, Changbin is precious, self-doubt and negative feelings, arguments, alcohol, blood and injury, swearing, genetic engineering, talks of self-determination and agency, Streetlight my beloved makes an appearance
word count: 12k
a/n: happy (belated) bday to my beloved Changbin (almost a month later, nice)! i hope this is enjoyable and worthy of someone as wonderful as Changbin seems (i might have slightly fallen in love with him while writing this, don't look at me). the lovely banner is by Sarah (@caelesjjk). I hope you enjoy!
smut warnings under the cut!
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smut warnings: sexual tension (lots of it), making out, kind of hatefucking?, sex outside (against a railing), clothed sex, dirty talk, brief nipple play, thigh riding, fingering (f!receiving), unprotected sex (just because Changbin can doesn't mean you should), honestly more mild than the warnings imply
It’d been years since you’d seen candles - forgotten memories of birthdays past that faded into oblivion. Their warm, nascent glow had flickered much like your own life had, the comfort of past years giving way to the bright, grating pixels of the lights that illuminated New Domino - bright pinks, vivid greens, cool blues and silvers. Lights that greeted you from your window when you went to bed every night, reminding you that no matter how much your life stalled, the city never would, much of it your own family’s doing.
The years before Miroh Labs, your family’s company, took hold of the city,  became difficult to recall — before the towering skyscrapers blocked out the sun, neon lights replacing its rays, technology weaving itself seamlessly into the fabric of your lives, like the patterns on your dress.
Picking at the threads – you wonder if someone had put love and care into intertwining each one, meeting perfectly to create the image of a flower. But the thought quickly dispels — knowing that a specialized machine was behind it, or an android doing the work that was once meant for humans. 
Resonance, your family prided themselves on saying. The ability of an object to match another’s frequency – only it’d progressed beyond anyone’s wildest dreams. Systems had advanced from being motherboards connected to screens to full blown humanized machines, who not only had to ability to perform human functions, but excel at them when it came to speed, efficiency, and cost. 
The thought of it made you sick to your stomach. As the presumptive heir to Miroh Labs’ empire, you’d seen firsthand how ambition had slowly given way to greed, your family creating and creating and creating, giving no mind to how their projects always seemed to end up in the hands of the city’s elite.
You’d been to the outskirts, the fringes of society failing to catch up with the advancement of the inner city, a ruined wasteland where people struggled to find work to bring home food for their families.
But they had candles, you muse, smiling lightly to yourself, remembering how you’d passed by a home once, devoid of any electricity, a single candle flickering in the window, the family huddled around their only source of light. It had brought them closer in ways that you could only dream of.
Which is why the intimate setting of the dining room shocked you today – lights dim, candleglow every prominent. Except instead of comforting you, it felt strangely eerie, casting shadows on the faces of your parents, seated at the head of the long table, your own chair pulled out at the very opposite end. 
Of course - your parents spared no opportunity to turn even the simplest of dinners into a boardroom meeting. Wincing, you feel the chair screech as you slide it across the cool tile, the sound grating your ears, which have begun to ring, pain throbbing at your temples.
The food is untouched, grave expressions on your parents’ face, and it’s your father who breaks the deafening silence.
“There’s a new project we want you to be a part of—”
“Forget it,” you pick at your plate. “I’m not interested. It’s not like I can contribute anything useful anyway.”
“This one’s different,” your mother’s voice cuts you off, and it’s softer, more gentle than you’ve ever heard it. For a moment, you could believe she actually cared.
Your father’s footsteps reverberate against the tile, walking over to your side of the table. A picture is set in front of you – a man. Dark curly hair, full lips, a strong jaw, the faint hint of muscle underneath his shirt. But it’s his eyes that pierce through the page – stark hazel. Your throat feels tight, closing in on itself.
“New employee?” you ponder, even though you know it’s not the answer.
Hazel eyes were for androids — no human would have eyes so piercing, ones that could glint in the darkest room, or pale in the brightest sun.
“___, meet C.H.A.N.G.B.I.N, Computer Human Advanced Network Growing By Intelligent Nexuses. Our pride and joy.”
You resist the urge to roll your eyes at the words, knowing they’d never applied to you – you with your rebellious streak, your lack of achievements, your failed engagement to a man that was far too good for you. 
Hyunjin’s face flashes in the back of your mind, and you fight to keep your expression from shifting.
“C.H.A.N.G.B.I.N was created for a very specific purpose you see — he’s been built and programmed to be the perfect companion. To provide all the qualities that one would normally seek in a spouse. Although humans are falliable, C.H.A.N.G.B.I.N is not. But we need a beta tester.”
The reality of what your parents are proposing dawns on you, horror creeping up your spine.
“No–,” you begin to protest, but you’re cut off by a wave of your father’s hand. 
“The announcements have already been uploaded to the city-wide servers. Starting tomorrow, news of C.H.A.N.G.B.I.N’s launch will go live, along with your engagement announcement. The wedding will be held in a week’s’ time.”
You look despondently to your mother, hoping the pain in your eyes is enough to dissuade her. Were you really that worthless to your parents that they’d hand you to a hunk of scrap metal, dooming you to loneliness for the rest of your life?
Your mother shakes her head. “___, dear, this is the least you can do for us, and for Miroh Labs. Especially given everything that’s happened.”
They always wielded it against you — the fact that you were hard to love. You hadn’t been enough to persuade Hyunjin to stay, and they’d experienced the fallout from whispers all around New Domino. Now, you were barely human in their eyes, not even equal to, and probably lesser than this machine they’d fabricated, one whose fate had become irrevocably intertwined with yours. And there was nothing you could do to stop it.
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When Changbin wakes, everything is a blur. While his lungs don’t burn for air, his circuits are driven haywire anyway by the new environment - the harsh gleam of fluorescent lights, the gentle whirring of motors, the coolness of the metal table. It hits him all at once, and he’s tempted to close his eyes again, to return to the darkness of being powered down.
A figure looms over him, a taller man in a lab coat, his eyes gentle and full of concern, almost as if he’s holding his breath looking at Changbin.
“Hello C.H.A.N.G.B.I.N, my name is Chan. I am one of the lead research developers at Miroh Labs. We’ve been waiting for you.”
Changbin feels his system boot up, gentle heat spreading through the center of his body, all the way to his fingertips.
“Good morning, Chan. I am C.H.A.N.G.B.I.N, Computer Human Andvanced Network Growing By Intelligent Nexuses. How may I be of assistance?”
His voice reverberates through his speakers, a monotonous tinge resounding against the empty walls of the lab, and he watches Chan’s face twist,
“Do you know why you’re here right now?” Chan asks, curiosity in his gaze.
“I am an advanced computer-human android, programmed to fulfill the role of a partner. My duties and capabilities include companionship, emotional support, and assistance with domestic tasks, designed to blend into one’s life seamlessly.”
As he speaks, Changbin notices his sensors blinking, watching different parts of his arm, chest, and the rest of his body light up as various programs are activated. 
Chan slides something in his direction – a sheet of paper with a picture on it. He takes a look at it, his cameras analyzing the woman in the photo. Everything from the colour of her hair to the tiny mole on the back of her hand, to the way she smiles, but it doesn’t reach her eyes, perhaps evidence that something is different with her psychology from normal humans.
“This is ___, the next in line to be CEO of Miroh Labs. You will be her future companion,” Chan sighs heavily. “The family has already gone live with the announcement for the wedding, we only have a week to prepare.”
Changbin’s sensors beep, red lights blinking while he processes what Chan is saying, and Chan looks on, a deep furrow in between his brows.
“A w-week?” Changbin, stutters, and Chan already wonders if there’s something wrong with his circuitry. That couldn’t be possible though, the ___ family had tasked him with working on this for the better part of nine months, dedicating each and every hour of his spare time to this endeavour. He brushes off the thought, knowing that there was no way your parents would proceed unless everything was guaranteed to be perfect. After all, the motto of Miroh Labs was to create a more perfect world.
Changbin straightens, legs swinging over the edge of the table as he rises, standing slightly shorter than Chan.
“I understand my responsibilities, Chan. I assure you I will carry them out to the best of my abilities, until ___ is nothing less than satisfied.”
Chan looks at the android in front of him, his face softening. For a moment, Changbin looked as real as him – from the way his hair curled to the strong lines of his body. He almost reminded him of a younger sibling, and a protective instinct washed over Chan.
“I know you will Changbin. But there’s also something you should know.”
Changbin looks up with anticipation at Chan, wondering if there was a new program Chan wanted to add, and whether that meant he had to wait before he could meet ___.
“Please don’t tell anyone I’m telling you this, but should you ever decide that this is what you want, or that you desire to do something different, to be somewhere else, there’s always a way out. You’re more than just an android Changbin.”
Changbin’s processors began to hum. More than just an android? It didn’t make sense to him. His programs were designed to be the best, to cover every single duty one could expect from a partner. What more could there be? Still, Chan’s words sparked intrigue, and he saved a recording of them to his memory, just in case they would be useful later.
“Alright then Changbin, shall we get started? There’s a lot we need to go over about ___ before the wedding happens. Her favourite colour, favourite foods, the layout of her apartment … these will help inform your programs to adapt even more perfectly to your duties,” Chan’s voice is calm and even, with no hints of the darkness of the previous conversation in his tone at all.
They tour around the laboratories, Chan introducing him to the new world he was now expected to be a part of — from the windows, Changbin looks out onto New Domino, watching the hovercrafts zip down the neon-lit streets, and the skyscrapers graze the clouds, a dense fog covering up the skyline. 
Changbin listens intently as Chan goes on, his motors continuing to whir and sensors lighting up as each new piece of information is revealed — the new dimensions of his existence seemed vast and overwhelming, and he worried whether he’d be up to the task, knowing what happened to androids who were faulty – they were deprogrammed, becoming no more than scrap metal to fuel the fires of those on the fringes of society. Shuddering at the thought, Changbin knew he had no choice but to succeed. All he could hope was that you would accept him too. 
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Goosebumps rise all along your arms — you feel the thorns of the roses prick your fingers as you clutch the bouquet in your hands tighter, listening from behind the door as the muted whispers of the guests fill the ceremony space. You can hear cameras going off, preparing yourself to be met with a grand scene - shimmering lights, velvet drapes, everything bathed in opulent hues of gold and silver. 
There’s an uncomfortable buzz – everything had happened so quickly. From the invitations going out to the details being finalized, you’d had little to no say in any of it, the uncomfortable lace of the dress you could barely voice your resistance to scratching against your skin, setting it on fire. For once, you wished you could down a glass of champagne or two to keep the nerves at bay. 
A pit settles in your stomach once the door opens, and you’re blinded by the twinkling lights of crystal chandeliers. Heart pounding in your ears, you move automatically without thinking, heels clacking against the polished marble floor. Everything around you is a blur – senses in overdrive, it all melds together. The bright flashes of the photographers, the uncomfortably cold temperature of the room, even the soft tones of the piano becoming grating to your ears.
The only thing that remains clear is the figure waiting for you at the end. You suck in a breath – seeing Changbin for the first time, you couldn’t help but marvel at how stunning of a specimen he was. Of course, he’d been designed to be crafted to perfection, but he was beyond flawless. 
Clad in a black tux, the fabric hugs his broad, muscular, frame and tapers at the waist, highlighting his athletic build. His dark hair is swept away from his forehead, exposing the prominent angles of his face. The put-togetherness of his appearance must only serve to highlight the chaos of your own, the makeup doing little to cover up the lack of sleep you’d dealt with ever since that fateful meeting with your parents. 
Coming up to the altar, Changbin extends his hand in your direction, and you’re shocked when you feel the warmth of his hand. Sparks jolt where your skin makes contact, and for a moment you forget that he’s not human like you, a jumble of circuits and running electricity. But it floats away when his posture goes rigid once again, with no hint of emotion on his face. 
Mechanical – that’s how every bit of this felt. From the brittleness in the officiant’s tone as he droned on about the sanctity of marriage, to the pointed stares and light din that surrounded what should have been a sacred moment – two souls joining together as one. But Changbin didn’t have a soul. And you weren’t sure you did either. The two of you were just glass figurines, put on display for everyone to ogle, cogs in the machine of this elaborate public spectacle that your parents had crafted. 
For a brief moment, you wonder if Hyunjin’s somewhere in the crowd, eyes widening as you search frantically for him, the one person who could have been your out, your chance at a normal life. But not a single face stands out to you – a crowd of strangers looking back at you. A bead of sweat pools at the base of your neck, and you suck in a breath.
You feel fingers wrap around your own, Changbin’s hand coming to clasp around yours, and it takes a moment for you to reorient yourself to the scene going on around you. The officiant is asking you to join hands, ready to repeat the vows that will join you and Changbin together. 
Changbin’s eyes bore into yours, the hazel containing more depth than you’d imagined for an android. 
“Are you ok?” the words are whispered so quietly you may have almost missed them. In fact, you believe you might have missed them, unable to believe what’s coming out of Changbin’s mouth. His voice is deeper than you’d expected, gravelly yet with a pleasant tone, far from the flat and monotone affect you’d expected. 
Either two things could have been true in this moment: 1) Changbin knew you better than you knew yourself, or 2) he was malfunctioning, a slip in his meticulous programming. But androids weren’t people, they weren’t capable of feeling for people. They were only capable of completing the tasks set out for them. 
You drop his hand, lips parting, unable to croak out a reponse for fear of arousing suspicion. But the moment is over before you’d even had a chance to respond, buried underneath his calculated rigidness once more. 
The knife twists deeper in your gut when your lips curl around the “I do”, the words sounding as artificial as Changbin’s own, sealing the vows that doomed the two of you to a loveless existence by each others’ side.
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Breathing a sigh of relief, you pull the heavy diamond earrings out of your ear, setting them on the cool crisp marble of your bathroom counter, rubbing at your burning earlobes. Alone in the comfort of your bathroom, you feel like you’re finally able to breathe again. And that’s when it all hits you, the gravity of what had just transpired weighing on you with the force of a heavy boulder. 
Throat closing in on itself, you struggle to breathe, doubling over as tears fill your eyes. Fingers, shaking, you fumble with the laces of your dress, until the tightness is removed from your rib cage and you can finally breathe again, the dress falling to the floor.
If Hyunjin was here, he’d help you take it off, his fingers dancing delicately across the skin of your back. He’d remove the pins from your hair gently, pressing a kiss to your head in the spot where each one of them had been, until you finally grew tired of his teasing, pulling him in to meet your lips. If Hyunjin had been here, your wedding would have been full of love and joy and laughter, the most vivid of paintings come to life. But you’d lost him, and now yourself. You were alone.
A distant clanging jolts you from your misery, and you slip into your pyjamas, softly padding out from your bathroom to see what the commotion was about. Immediately, you’re hit with the aroma of savoury garlic and herbs, stomach rumbling in response. You’d barely eaten anything the whole night, scared that whatever you tried to would just come back up due to the gnawing feeling in your gut.
It hits you that you were no longer alone in this apartment — there was another being here now, one who’d managed to crawl inside the walls that you’d kept up. Changbin had no choice but to be here with you, to see you at your most vulnerable and exposed. 
The hallway is dark as you make your way to the kitchen, pausing when you see Changbin bent over the stove, a crisp white apron around his waist. He’d changed too, clad in a comfy pair of grey sweats and a black t-shirt that showcases his wide shoulders.
The grumbling of your stomach gives you away – Changbin turning to see you at the threshold, his face lighting up in a smile. You notice how it doesn’t reach his eyes, restrained and polite – like the ones that littered the billboards of New Domino, promoting the latest breakthroughs.
“Dinner is almost ready,” he assures you. “I made aglio e olio.”
Your eyebrows raise in surprise at the Italian dish he’d mentioned — one of your favourites, but it sours when you think about how he’d probably been trained by the researchers to know your preferences. If it had been another person, maybe he would have made kimchi jigae or maqluba. It meant nothing.
“Smells great,” you manage to croak out, grateful for the hot meal. In a few moments, the table is full of two steaming plates of pasta, Changbin taking his place at the other end. You’re grateful he doesn’t try to sit next to you, allowing you to eat in piece. Silence passes, filled only with the clanging of forks, and you watch Changbin bristle in his chair. He pauses every few moments, like he wants to say something, but holds back, until you can no longer take it.
“What is it?” you spit out, uncaring at how harsh the words come across. Changbin doesn’t flinch, but you watch lights run across his arm, whirring emanating from him, like he’s trying to process your actions. You let out a heavy sigh.
“Did you enjoy the meal?” he asks, and you’re taken aback. You hadn’t expected such a simple, yet earnest question. You’d half-expected him to ask you to rate his skills from one to ten, like the surveys that popped up whenever you dined out at a fancy restaurant.
“It was delicious,” you refuse to lie. The pasta had quelled the burning hunger you’d felt, making you considerably less irritable, and Changbin whirs to life again, processing what you’d just told him.
You help him clean up, the two of you working in tandem to clear the table, carefully skirting around each other. Shadows dance across the wall from the city lights reflecting through the window.
Warmth emanates from Changbin, as you feel his heavy breath fan the back of your neck, startled by how life-like it actually felt. You realize you’re caged behind his arms as he puts the dried plates into the cabinet above you, the air growing thick with something you couldn’t name.
Turning around, you’re pressed against the hard planes of Changbin’s chest, and you lurch at the way your body comes to life against his, nipples peaking in the cold air. 
A light flickers at Changbin’s temple, and he studies you curiously, watching the way your chest rises and falls, the way your breathing quickens.
His gaze lingers on your lips, leaning in closer. But before he can meet yours, you’re pulling away, shame and guilt in your chest. This wasn’t real. None of it was. And the sooner you learned to accept it, the less miserable both of you would be.
“I’m tired,” you whisper into thin air, turning your face away from his. “I want to go to bed.”
You swear Changbin’s eyes flicker for a brief moment before he straightens, responding with the mechanical tone you’d expected all along.
“Of course, you must be exhausted from today.”
You falter, not knowing whether he’d follow you into your room. Now that you were married, it was expected you’d share a bed. Stepping away, you’re relieved when he doesn’t follow.
Staring up at the ceiling of your bedroom, your mind replays everything that had happened – the fake fanfare of the wedding to Changbin asking if you were okay, to whatever had just happened now. Changbin couldn’t have wanted to kiss you, right? He lacked his own desires. Someone had probably told him that was what couples did. 
The softness of your sheets and the light streaming in from your window did nothing to quell the turmoil arising within you – your room no longer felt like the safe refuge it had once been, where you could shut out the rest of the world. 
In the silence of the night, the weight of what your life had become settled heavily on your chest. Once full of warmth and love, it was now cold and unfeeling, as clinical as the hallways of Miroh Labs. 
For a brief moment, you hear steps come towards your bedroom, before they retreat. The hallway light flickers, before it’s turned off, and you’re able to retreat into the darkness once more.
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No, you’d told your parents when they’d brought up the idea. Absolutely not.
As usual, your pleading fell on deaf ears. The invites had already been accepted, your dress had been arranged, and a night filled with mindless drivel and booze chatting with the city’s elite waited for you and Changbin. 
You hated it – this pretending. At home, it was easy to accept, the way you and Changbin moved around each other, the uneasiness of that first night permeating every interaction you’d had after. But out here, in New Domino, the pretending had to happen. You had to play the part of a couple in love.
Changbin took to it easier than you’d expected. You’d nearly stumbled the moment you’d stepped out of your room, watching him turn to you with hands tucked into the pockets of yet another black tux. You briefly wondered if it was the exact same one he’d worn to the wedding – it wasn’t like there was a need for him to have different outfits, since his clothes never got dirty. 
You hoped Changbin didn’t notice your gaze lingering on just how good he managed to look – outshining even your emerald silk gown. You wait for the same from him – a falter, a nod, some sort of acknowledgment that he was just as taken by you. But it never comes, his arm slipping stiffly into yours. 
The car ride to the gala is silent, a sea of nerves and anxiety filling the space between you two. The lights from the city pass you by, illuminating Changbin’s face in a strange, yet beautiful glow. 
However, you barely acknowledge it, lost in thought while watching the cars speed by on the freeway. Before long, the glittering lights of the manor greet you, and it feels as though you’re transported back in time. As much as the upper echelon of New Domino loved their androids and their hovercrafts, nothing could replace the value of a night full of egregiously expensive liquor and brainless chatter about how far society had come, knowing they’d done little to contribute to it besides emptying their pockets.
Changbin lingers by your side, and you’re painfully aware of his scent – the one he’d chosen for tonight. Black leather and sandalwood saturate the air in between you, and you notice the stares from other guests as the two of you weave through the crowd, you in search of water to clear the pounding headache that had begun to form at your temples.
For how out of place he is, Changbin dances the dance of your peers well – meeting their fake smiles with a polished one of his own, waving and happily introducing himself to anyone that passes by.
It shouldn’t bother you that none of it directed at you – you told yourself you didn’t want his affection, that he could never give you what he desired. So why did it bother you when he stops one of the hostesses for a glass of champagne, watching her face turn sour when he swerves to hand it to you?
You down the drink before he can even blink, moving away from him and further into the throng. Your head is buzzing, and you feel the alcohol come straight back up, rushing to the bathroom when you hear it – a soft whisper, but it cut through the music like a blade.
“It’s almost amusing,” a woman says, “to see such a flawless machine with someone so... human.”
“You know what happened with her last engagement, right? Hyunjin left her for another woman…”
It’s too much to bear, bile rising in your throat, before you feel a hand on the small of your back. If Changbin was human, you’d almost expect his knuckles to turn white with the force he uses to grip your waist. 
“I suggest you keep your unwanted comments to yourself,” Changbin seethes, watching the guests turn pale. You sway under his touch, head spinning from the combination of alcohol and Changbin coming to your defense, before he’s leading you away, the crisp night air from the balcony nipping at your backs.
“Is everything okay?” he asks you gently, while you watch the same light at his temple flicker. 
None of this was okay. None of it at all. But you didn’t want to make him understand how much was wrong with you being here with him, when it should have been someone else, someone you actually had loved. 
“It’s fine,” you clear your throat, peeling his hand from your waist. His touch continues even after you’ve removed his fingers, and you shiver. 
You were used to it – the stares, the whispers. They’d followed you your whole life, the cuts left in their wake eventually turning into hardened scars. You didn’t need defending, least of all from him.
“I’m going to leave,” you tell him, stepping away. “You’re free to stay. Please don’t let me ruin your evening.” 
“I can go with you,” his voice echoes from beside you, “I was getting tired anyway.”
A sick, twisted laugh bubbles from your throat at his insistence. Changbin didn’t get tired, he couldn’t get tired. He wasn’t like you.
“Stay,” your voice is resolute. “That’s an order, Changbin.”
Changbin turns to face you, recoiling at the red rimming your eyes, the bags underneath them becoming even more prominent when the lights of the manor illuminate you from behind. 
You don’t know what possesses him to reach for the single strand of hair that has managed to escape your polished bun, but he watches you suck in a breath, lips parting in surprise.
Your paralysis slowly melts away and you’re pushing him away without realizing it, walking away without another word. You don’t dare to turn around, knowing your heart would twist when you found Changbin looking at you again with that same blank expression – the one you’d come to know all too well.
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Dawn is is barely trickling when you slip out of your apartment. Passing by the living room, you notice Changbin in the corner, standing against the wall. For a moment, he looks so peaceful you would almost think he’d fallen asleep. However, you take one look at the outlet and realize he’s powered down for the night, free from his duties of following you around. A pang of annoyance rattles through you. It should have been romantic, knowing Changbin had no point to his existence if it didn’t revolve around you. All it did was made you sick to your stomach instead. 
Curling your jacket tighter around you, you duck your head down, few vehicles on the streets due to the early hour. The city seemed eerie yet peaceful at dawn, the dim rays of sun barely breaking through the clouds, casting everything in a soft orange glow. Such a stark contrast from the bright neon and gray that tinged its walls at every other time of day.
With only the sound your heels slamming against the pavement to keep you company, your walk slips into a run as your coat flies behind you, the wind whipping through your air. The city is soon left behind, tall skyscrapers giving way to modest brick houses, plumes of smoke wafting through the air.
Fire. You smile at the thought of it. Fire meant happy homes, with happy families. Families who relied on each other, who loved one another.
The haze that had clouded your head last night seems to have subsided, head clearer from the fresh air. But thoughts of Changbin cease to depart as easily, and it leaves you to wonder exactly where you stood with him.
He cared, more than an android should. For a moment it almost seemed like maybe he–
You shake the thought away, rounding the corner, shoulders immediately slumping in relief when you see the worn-out sign of the clinic.
“___?” a voice calls out to you. “Is that you?”
“Hello Jeongin,” you smile at the younger boy who bounds down the steps when he sees your figure standing outside, hair windswept and cheeks flushed as he comes to a halt next to you.
“Noona, what are you doing here?” he asks, and you feel yourself shrink underneath his sincere gaze.
“What do you mean? I always come by this time every week,” you raise an eyebrow, watching Jeongin bounce on the balls of his feet.
“But noona, you’re married now.”
You freeze at his statement, not realizing that the news had reached here too. Jeongin’s eyes are alight with excitement, and you know he’s going to ask questions that you don’t have the heart to answer.
As if he can sense your trepidation, Jeongin ushers you inside, the warm smiles of the elderly patients you’d come to know and love greeting you.
Before long, the two of you are at work, you helping them fill out their paperwork while Jeongin works to check their vitals and bring them back for the doctor to see them. All the while, you’re regaled with stories about their lives, including lost loves, mischievous grandchildren, and fond memories of a time that has since passed. 
This is why you loved coming here. It reminded you that away from the hustle of New Domino, actual life existed. Life imbued with meaningful moments, connections, and people. Something that society seemed to have forgotten. 
“You have such a beautiful smile,” one of the regulars, Miss Choi, pinches your cheek affectionately. “It’s such a shame we didn’t see it in any of your photos.”
“Oh,” you breathe out, shoulders tensing. “I guess Jeongin must have shown everyone.”
“Of course dear, you looked lovely. And such a handsome groom too!”
She titters, and you ponder about whether or not she knows the actual details of your wedding, of who Changbin really was. Even if she did, would she understand it? Even though he’d long since passed away, Miss Choi had a husband who’d loved her, who was capable of loving her. She wasn’t a victim of someone else’s greed, of their ambition. She’d never understand the kind of abyss that New Domino had become, and if she did, she’d probably be horrified. 
You pat her shoulder, hoping she can’t see the way your breath hitches, before you’re rushing to the back, curling in on yourself as sobs wrack your entire body.
Jeongin is by your side in seconds, a steady arm on your shoulder, and you lean into the younger boy, someone who despite not having spent that much time with, had become your one of your closest friends. 
“How much of it did you hear?” you mutter, looking at the floor.
“I heard enough,” he says softly. “I’m so sorry, noona.”
You don’t know how long you stay glued to Jeongin’s side, unable to stand upright, the two of you failing to notice the figure watching from outside the window. 
. . .
Changbin hadn’t meant to follow you. He’d heard you slip out in the morning, not having powered down completely last night. After what had happened at the gala, his processors had gone into overdrive, replying everything – the whispers of those awful guests, the way you leaned into his touch, to your harsh words telling him you didn’t want him around.
Changbin wonders if he’d already failed at his task – it seemed like you didn’t care for his companionship, no matter how hard he tried. The walls you had built were too high for even his sophisticated technology to penetrate, and he hums, wondering if this meant he’d be deprogrammed. 
Chan’s words from before echo in the back of his mind – what did he mean an alternative? Was there another task he could be useful for, even if you didn’t want him?
Not wanting to dwell too long, he trails a safe distance behind you, watching you break into a run, limbs heavy with fatigue, your breathing labored, until an unfamiliar neighbourhood materializes, the grandeur of luxury boutiques and high-end restaurants fading into older buildings.
Finally catching up to you, he watches you embrace a younger man, the two of you walking into a battered, broken down building together. Heat floods Changbin, his gears kicked into overdrive, struggling to make sense of what he was witnessing. Did you already have someone else? Was this Hyunjin, the one who’d left you?
The air turns crisp the longer he lingers outside the door, waiting for any sign. He gets it when he sees a leaf fall, your figure appearing in the window, hunched over like you’re in pain. The same man from before is by your side, offering you his shoulder to lean on.
Changbin doesn’t know what comes over him — he’s at the door before he can think, even rationalize what’s going on. 
He waits until your figure materializes from the back, wanting to see who the new entry was. Your lips part in a silent gasp when you see Changbin standing there.
It’s like he’s malfunctioning, gears whining and lights glinting, his jaw tense when Jeongin comes up behind you.
“Noona,” he hears the other man whisper. “I think you should go.”
You nod wordlessly, motioning for Changbin to walk with you, the two of you ignoring the many eyes that follow you, making your way down the dimly lit street.
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The wind whips around him as Changbin jogs behind you, watching as you push through the crowds of passerby. You walk and walk, and he follows, watching the houses disappear behind him as you go higher and higher, eventually stopping when the road ends.
The view isn’t even comparable to the one from your penthouse – it’s even better. From the hill, he can see everything – the houses you’d passed on your way, to the bright lights of the city center, to beyond the horizon, where a mass of dense clouds covers the horizon. Which is exactly where you’re looking, and Changbin can’t help but look too, wondering what lies past their cover. 
“I used to come here with Hyunjin,” you break the silence. “Before everything fell apart.”
“We’d just sit here and look at the sky,” you continue, words crashing into each other as you rush to get them out. Changbin doesn’t know whether he should reach out for you, but decides against it, not wanting to startle your trembling figure.
“We’d look at the sky and wonder about what the future would look like — a million different scenarios. Sometimes we’d be rich, other times poor, living in the city, living out of it. But we always had each other. Until he decided to leave.”
“We should get you home–”
“Am I really that hard to love?” you blurt out, and Changbin freezes, the naked truth of why you’d been so cold finally exposed to him. 
“___, it’s not, you shouldn’t think like this–,” Changbin struggles to analyze this, something far beyond the limits of what his data sets had compiled. This was different, this grief was beyond the depths of his understanding. This yearning for something else, someone else. 
“Can you make it go away Changbin? This emptiness that lives inside me. This feeling that my life has never been mine, will never be mine?” you taunt him, knocking against his chest, scoffing when you hear the hollowness of metal.
“You can’t, can’t you? You’re just an android–”
“I’M NOT!” Changbin screams, his circuits devolving into chaos at the sharb jab of your words, Chan’s words coming back to him. “I’m not! I’m not! I’m not.”
He feels sparks inside him, his words stilting as he struggles to get them out. His fingers grasp at the back of his neck, searching for the one button he knows can end this, can put him out of his misery. He doesn’t want you to see him like this.
He doesn’t even notice how close you’ve become until he feels your breath fan against his lips, like that first night.
“Prove it,” you whisper, eyes off to the side like you didn’t expect him to listen.
But he listens.
Changbin surges forward, seeking your lips, and you stumble for a brief second, thinking you’ll hurtle off the hilltop, before his arm comes up to wrap around you, your hands tangling in his hair in an instant. The wind howls around you both, yet a shiver ran down your spine, blood pounding in your ears.
His lips were softer than you’d expected, and you capture him with your teeth, drawing him in, a moan bubbling up in your chest. 
He feels so real. This felt so real. 
Changbin can hardly think either, kicked into overdrive, the feel of your hungry mouth against his, the fervent swipe of his tongue against your lips. You knew this was a bad idea, that it would complicate everything, but you didn’t have it in you to care, hands roaming everywhere, slipping  underneath the hem of Changbin’s shirt to trace circles against his hard stomach.
A strangled sound escapes Changbin’s throat, and the two of you part, flustered and trembling, Changbin resting his forehead to yours. Your fingers card through the soft hair at the nape of his neck, and he moves again, roving down your jawline, lapping at your skin. Despite it being freezing out, a thin trail of sweat trickles down your neck, and Changbin doesn’t miss the opportunity to taste you, teeth grazing as he goes.
“Let me show you,” he rumbles into your chest, voice raspy from the lack of air. 
The cold metal of the railing juts against your back as Changbin lunges, his arm locking you into place. Your cry of protest turns into a gasp when he nudges a knee in between your thighs, spreading them apart. 
“God, just fucking touch me already,” you seethe, gasping when he thumbs at your nipples through the fabric of your shirt, the swollen peaks stiffening when he tugs them with his fingers.
An ache begins to build between your thighs when you look into Changbin’s eyes, their laser-like focus on you and you only, and that’s when his fingers slip underneath your skirt and straight to where you need him. 
“Say please,” he whispers, and for a moment, you imagine the same desperation in his tone that colours yours.
Even when you don’t say anything, he knows from the tremble of your lips and the slight nod of your head that you want this. 
The moment he swipes his fingers against your core, Changbin curses, palm meeting the furious grinding of your hips.
Your hands ball into fists, feeling the slick leak out of you, and you whine, a warm flush settling over your body, evidence of its betrayal.  
“Pretend all you want,” Changbin hisses. “Pretend you hate me. Pretend you don’t see me. But we both know you want this.”
You try to hold your resolve, your wet cunt leaking even more, walls fluttering around his fingers. One wrong move and you’d go hurtling over the railing. But Changbin’s grip on you is like a vice, which only makes you squeeze harder around his knee. 
He changes his pace, circling faster, harder, and your head goes hazy from the stimulation, your hands grabbing fistfuls of Changbin’s shirt. When you feel yourself teetering on the brink, body flushing with anticipation, it all stops. 
Panting, you look at Changbin, his dark eyes surveying you hungrily, and you hear the clink of his belt, quivering as you try and spare yourself from being utterly wrecked by the sight of his cock.
“Look. at. me,” he grabs your chin and turns your head towards him, your eyes fluttering from the delirium of it all.
Gripping your thighs, he sinks you down onto him. You cry out as the initial pain subsides and you feel his hips snap up into you, pubic bone rolling against your clit.
“Changbin, I, shit-, it’s too much!” you plead, shamelessly rocking aginst him as he sets a brutal pace, the sounds of skin slapping and your breathy moans echoing bouncing from the walls.
Changbin says nothing, planting a messy kiss on your lips, prodding his tongue into the seam of your mouth to taste, and you anchor your palms against the railing, allowing him to roll his hips upward, the two of you moving in tandem.
The fire in your abdomen reaches a peak, a new wave of arousal suddenly washing over you as you feel your hips jerk, coming undone as you collapse against Changbin, stifling a groan against his throat.
Lifting you off of the railing, Changbin’s arms reach around your body to press you against him, his lips ghosting your forehead, and you feel something wet against the side of your face. Tears.
“Changbin–”
You wobble to your feet, head swirling with emotion, but he’s already pulling away, the faint outline of his figure the only thing you see as he heads off into the night.
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Sighing, you pull your glasses down onto your face, hoping they can diguise the fact that despite your best efforts, your night was absolutely restless, swimming with thoughts of Changbin.
After leaving you on the hilltop, he’d vanished, leaving you to make your own way home. And now, not even a day later, your parents had decided to add to your headache by summoning you for a board meeting. 
You expected them to ask for updates on your relationship with Changbin, to pry into your life, pretending like they cared. It was what they’d always done.
But you never expected this.
“I–, I don’t understand,” you gnaw at your lip, biting down so hard the skin may break. In front of you, the powerpoint gleams brightly. You can read the words off the slide, but you struggle to actually process them. And what they mean.
The beta testing was successful. Although people responded rather tepidly at first to the idea of a human-android relationship, we’ve gotten more positive feedback and requests to expand than ever. We’re on the verge of a new breakthrough here at Miroh Labs. And we want you to take charge of it. 
Your father’s words have been echoing ceaslessly in the back of your mind, ever since he uttered them the moment you walked in.
The news has you deeply unsettled. You’d thought that this was some kind of social experiment, that you and Changbin were some freaks of nature, two outcasts in society brought together as a spectacle for others. You’d never anticipated it would come to this. 
Miroh Labs wasn’t just looking to change the future of human-android relationships. No your parents twisted plan took it a step further – they sought to create models beyond Changbin’s capabilities as a companion, ones who would be equipped with the ability to reproduce. 
We’d never have to worry about birth rates or a weak genetic pool again.
Looking out the window, you look out onto New Domino, the blueprints reflecting onto the screen, clashing with the holographic displays outside, a stark contrast to the storm that was brewing inside the boardroom. 
Face illuminated by the blue glow of the screens, your breath comes out in short, uneven bursts. Your mother reaches out, watching your handles tremble, but you yank them away before she can clasp them in hers,
“Don’t touch me!” you hiss. “Was this all a fucking joke to you? Playing with my life, my emotions, so you could turn me into some kind of laughingstock for whatever sick idea you had?”
Standing up, you clutch the the documents to your chest.
“I’m done,” you declare. If you’d asked seven years ago, maybe you would’ve have done it, so desparate to please everyone around you that you’d say yes to whatever came your way. But now you knew better than to trust anyone. It’d only end up in heartbreak, and you refused to be a part of this sick and twisted legacy. 
You needed to talk to Changbin. 
. . . 
The soft thud of shoes at the entryway feels louder than ever, knowing that you’ve been lying on your bed for the past eight hours, willing the tears to stop. But they never did.
Heartbeat pounding in your ears, you prod your aching limbs to get up, soreness flooding your entire body when you stand. Padding softly out into the hallway, you gasp when you see Changbin there, standing solemnly against the window.
He knows you from even the quietest sound, head turning when you come up behind him. There was so much you had to talk about, so much to address. But you couldn’t even look him in the eyes.
You reach behind you to grab the papers you’d stolen,and Changbin’s eyes widen with surprise when you push them in his direction, confusion marring his handsome face. 
The two of you stand there while he reads, a multitude of moments passing in silence.
“I don’t get it,” he protests. “This seems like a logical progression. Shouldn’t you be happy?”
“You don’t get it, do you Changbin?,” you declare firmly, doing your best to overcome the wobble in your voice. “This changes everything.”
You hear Changbin whir, temple lighting up with red, and for a moment, all there is to fill the silence is the sound of clicking and beeping. Was this it? Had Changbin finally reached his limits.
You’d been thinking about this for hours, about how to tell Changbin, how to break the news to him. You had no idea where you stood without, about how he felt after what’d you’d both shared at the lookout. And despite the thousands of theorized and calculated ways you’d thought of in your head, telling you that this didn’t matter, that it wouldn’t hurt him, you still choke back a sob.
“Don’t you understand? They want to change everything, to alter what it even means to be human? If an android can reproduce with a human, then what’s the point of marriage? What’s the point of falling in love? It all just becomes a stupid commodity, a race to see who can pop out babies the fastest, who can engineer the most perfect spawn. All the meaning from life as we know will be gone.”
Changbin’s eyes flicker for a brief moment, hurt and confusion settling on his face.
“What are you saying ___? Look at me. Please.” 
The words come out in a desperate whine, Changbin lifting your face up to his, searching your eyes for a spark of emotion, but all he finds are hollow pools of emptiness.
You take a moment to respond, knowing that what you have to say will be the end of this, will probably drive a stake through the farce that had been your marriage.  
“You’ll never understand Changbin. You can simulate every single emotion and fulfill every task. Hell, even if they upgrade you and you’re somehow able to reproduce, you just won’t get it. Because you don’t know what real love is like; all you know is the substitute. And it will never be enough.”
“This isn’t fair,” Changbin chokes out, recoiling. “All I have ever done is my best. All I can ever do is my best. Why is that not enough?”
“I’m sorry,” you look at him, tears blurring your vision. “I wish it was.”
“A-are you going to deprogram me?” Changbin hums, and all of a sudden, his sensors go haywire, every single one lighting up and blinking until they devolve into chaos. Your heart lurches seeing him like this, reaching out for him, but he slaps your arm away.
“Do you know what the worst part of this is ___? It’s not you, or whatever you think you feel. Because you’ve never fucking known what you wanted. No, it’s that, for one fucking night, you had me convinced. Convinced that I was something more than just a hunk of scrap metal to you. Convinced that there was some sick, twisted part of me that actually thought you could love me.  But I don’t want you to lie to yourself anymore. I want to leave.”
You don’t say a word to him as he pads out of the kitchen, slipping his coat over his shoulders and tying his shoes. 
As he slips out the door, you hears his voice, so quiet that you’re almost not convinced it’s real.
“Forgive me.”
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The moon shines on the dark streets, it’s gentle light almost swallowed by their neon glow. Changbin runs, heart pounding in sync with his frantic steps. 
Taking in a deep breath, he watches the city melt away again, the night air becoming colder, heavier with the fog of polluted smoke, until he’s there again. The hilltop. Looking out onto the city, he marvels at how it had once been a place full of so much intensity, maybe even love. He thinks back to the feeling of your lips on his, to the way you’d gasped his name. But now he feels nothing but emptiness. 
Maybe he deserved that emptiness. Maybe you were right, maybe he could never be more than what he was – an automated program. Maybe it was better that he’d never see you smile again, never get to watch you hum contentedly when you took a bite of food that you loved, that he’d never ever have the chance to even say that he loved you. Because he wanted to, not because he had to. 
“Changbin?” a voice calls out to him. “Is that you?”
Turning, he watches as the lithe figure of Chan comes into view, face furrowed in confusion at the sight of an android wandering alone on the streets. 
“What are you doing here?” he asks, and Changbin feels himself shrink, embarrassment cutting deep into him like a knife.
“I had to leave,” he feels himself heat, drive replaying the memories of his last conversation with you. “I had to go, I didn’t know what else to do–”
Changbin clenches his jaw, body tense as he fears Chan’s response, wondering if the other man will laugh at his stupidity. 
Androids don’t get choices. 
Surprisingly, the look on his face is one of understanding. Chan motions for Changbin to follow him, the two of them heading out into the lonely night.
. . . 
The flickering lights of a warehouse come into view, casting long shadows on the ground. Changbin turns to Chan, body going rigid, and the lights cast an eerie glow on Chan’s face, the other half bathed in the darkness.
Stepping through the door, he’s surprised to find it more cosy than industrial, a clean, fresh scent overtaking his senses, one that reminded him of your apartment. It smelled like home. Something that Changbin was unsure he’d ever find. 
“Come sit here, Changbin,” Chan motions to a sofa. “Now do you want to tell me what you were doing roaming around at night like that?”
“You told me once that if I decided this life wasn’t what I wanted, that if I wanted to be more than an android, there was a way out. Is that still true?” Changbin’s words sound hollow to his own ears, and he watches Chan flinch in surprise.
“You’ve heard about the project.”
Chan bristles, reaching over to wrap an arm around Changbin, pulling him into a hug, and Changbin collapses against his shoulder. He was so tired.
“It’s not about the project,” Changbin mumbles into Chan’s shoulder, and Chan pushes him away gently. If he wasn’t mistaken, Chan could almost imagine Changbin’s eyes glimmering with tears. “It’s ___.”
Changbin can’t stop the words from spilling out, and he tells Chan everything. Everything from how cold you’ve been, to those little moments of warmth he’d come to live for, ones where your exterior of ice melted into something kinder, more gentle. He tells him about that night the two of you had shared, the one where your walls had come crashing down. And how he desperately wanted them to keep coming down for him every single day. He didn’t know whether or not he was capable of love, but he wanted it with you. And yet, you didn’t feel the same. You told him you couldn’t. 
Chan listens to it all, and without saying anything, stands up. Changbin looks at him despondently, wondering if he’d just made a fool of himself, but Chan motions to one of the doors, telling Changbin softly that he’ll be right back.
A few tense moments pass, and Changbin wonders if he’s been abandoned. But then Chan comes back, and he’s not alone. With him is another person, slightly shorter. His long, brown hair curls around the base of his neck, chubby cheeks wide in a huge heart-shaped smile. If Changbin didn’t see his hazel eyes, he would have also assumed that he was human, just like Chan.
Another android.
“Hello, I’m Jisung.”
Changbin’s eyes widen at Jisung in front of him, wondering what someone like him was doing here on the outskirts, where most people were too poor to own an android.
“Jisung used to be a domestic android,” Chan explains. “He worked for a family in New Domino that wasn’t very kind to him.”
“They took advantage of me,” Jisung has a far-off look in his eyes. “In many different ways. But that’s why I ran. Chan-hyung found me in a coffee-shop one day and brought me back to live with him.”
“How did you, I mean, how could you just leave like that? People need you,” Changbin is perplexed at the sight in front of him. 
“Do they really?” Jisung counters. “Think about it, Changbin, what do they need us for? To make their lives easier? So they can sit back and reject every sense of responsibility they have towards others? The system we have is so flawed, and there’s so many others out there like me and you who suffer because of it.”
Chan nods his head in agreement. 
“Why should you and Jisung have to pay the price for the mistakes of others? Why are you left questioning your identity, your own existence? You could be so much more in society than an end for other people’s satisfaction.”
“I make music now,” Jisung has a soft smile on his face. “Chan-hyung showed me how to use a production software, and now, I can go out to shops, walk around the neighbourhood, and use that inspiration for something beautiful. It’s not much, but it’s better than what I had to live for before.”
“Aren’t you scared, though? Of being deprogrammed, of being replaced?” Changbin can’t help the question from spilling out, his mind flashing back to how you had Hyunjin before him, and how easily you leaned into Jeongin, the employee at the clinic. Who was he compared to them?
“Life is so much more than living in fear, Changbin,” Jisung tells him. “If you just take a chance, maybe you can see that.”
And Changbin wants to believe him, to believe that he can leave this all behind, to start over again. But that would also mean leaving you behind, and that’s something he’s not sure he live with.
As if he can sense Changbin’s trepidation, Chan lays a reassuring hand on his shoulder again.
“You’re smarter than you think, Changbin. You’ll figure things out.”
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You stare up at the ugly popcorn ceiling of the gallery. For being a space dedicated to showcasing the beauty of art, it paled in comparison to its inhabitants, cold concrete floors along with walls filled with cracks and peeling paint.
It has to be that way. Otherwise, would you even focus on the art?
The words bring a soft smile to your lips when you think of the last time you’d heard them. They ring true when you look at the painting in front of you – bold, dark colours interspersed with flecks of white. You get what the artist was trying to go for - the brightness of snow gleaming against a hillside, the snowflakes tiny pearls of brightness against the inky black backdrop of the night sky.
Lost in your study of the piece, you fail to notice the footsteps behind you, only turning when you feel a shadow loom over you.
“That one’s new,” Hyunjin says, coming to stand next to you. “Me and Yuna went to Interlaken last winter, you know I had to paint it.”
You bristle at his voice, an uncomfortable feeling bubbling in your chest. You’d always imagined this, meeting him again. What you’d say, what you’d do. Somehow, your dreams always ended with him taking you back. But now, that no longer felt right. 
“I didn’t expect you to be here,” you breathe out, realizing how stupid it sounds. Hyunjin literally worked there.
“I heard about the wedding. Congratulations.”
“Nothing to congratulate me for.”
“___,” Hyunjin croaks, and you stiffen at your name tumbling from his lips. “I’m sorry.”
There was a lot Hyunjin had to apologize for – leaving you suddenly, ending years of a relationship in one single moment, only for him to turn around and marry your best friend months later. A friend you no longer spoke to.
But it all seemed trivial now – it seemed like the past had consumed you, your demons chasing and chasing until they’d cornered you, leaving you with nowhere to run, no one to to turn to.
You’d had Changbin, and now he was gone. And you were alone, like you were always mean to be.
Your lips purse into a straight line, giving no indication that you accept Hyunjin’s apology.
“___ please, I know I can’t ask you to forgive me for what I did. I know it’s unforgivable. But please, you have to move on. You deserve to be loved. To have love.”
You’re unsure how much Hyunjin knows about you, or even Changbin, but the bitter regret in the his voice tells you that you weren’t the only one with wounds who’d been festering for longer than they should’ve.
“It feels like I’m trapped,” you finally admit out loud. “I’m trapped and there’s this lead weight that’s crushing me, and I can’t think, I can’t feel, I can’t even breathe— god, I just want to breathe, Hyun. And I lost the one person that was my chance to live again.” The words come out as sobs, Hyunjin raising a concerned eyebrow, and you shake your head, dismissing his suspicions.
“You care about him. The android.”
“Don’t call him that. He has a name.” 
You bite your tongue at the grating response, mouth filling with the taste of blood. Changbin’s words from that night echo in your brain – I’m not, I’m not, I’m not.
He wasn’t. 
Hyunjin sees the heat rush to your face when you mention him, the way your entire being changes – your once despondent body coming alive with emotion. And he knows that what you felt for him will never compare to now. Fate had steered you on opposite courses, your destiny intertwined with Changbin’s, his with Yuna’s. 
“You know what you have to do then,” are his last words to you before you hear his boots tap against the cold concrete, walking away.
. . . .
The abandoned railway station lay forgotten at the edge of the city, a silent witness to years of decay. The iron tracks were tangled in weeds, and the once-bustling platform was now a graveyard of rusted metal and cracked concrete. The setting sun cast long, melancholic shadows, painting the scene in shades of orange and gray.
Changbin feels the cold metal of the bench against his back, and cards his fingers through his hair. He wonders if the disheveled strands, or the stains and threabare seams of his clothes, make him look more real. More human. 
Holding the flyer in his hands, he stares at the face on it, in disbelief that it was once his face. So composed, so put together. So much had changed since then.
Finding Jisung and Chan had been a blessing, but it wasn’t enough. The emptiness remained, filled with thoughts of you, and he wonders if he’ll ever see you again. Whether you even thought of him. 
The hum of an approaching vehicle broke the oppressive silence. Changbin’s head snapped up, his eyes widening as he saw headlights cutting through the dusk. 
They’d found him. He had to run.
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Miroh Labs had always been a prison – your prison. A cold, glowing fortress against the backdrop of New Domino, a place once full of so much promise. The place where you thought you’d prove yourself. But now it was time to let it go. 
Chan is waiting for you at the entrance, lips parted in surprise when he sees you approaching. You don’t blame him for thinking that you’d bail. The plan had come together in mere hours, chaos unfolding the moment you’d returned to your apartment, going through every paper, every file as to how you could set your plan in motion.
Somehow, Chan seemed like a person you could trust. You briefly remember Changbin mentioning how Chan had been the first one to see him, shocked at how many of the little details about his presence you’d actually committed to memory.
It scared you, putting your heart and life on the line like this. But it had to be worth it – for the chance to live again, to love again.
“You ready for this?” Chan asked, his calm demeanor a stark contrast to your mess of emotions. His eyes glinted curiously in against the backdrop of darkness. voice steady and reassuring.
You nodded, full of determination. It was now or never.
“I am. I’ll take care of the security systems. You get to the servers.”
Chan gives a quick nod, before disappearing into the building.
You freeze, realizing you should have asked Chan if he knew anything about Changbin, where he was, what he was doing. You just had to hope this worked, and that you would be able to later. That was the only way.
The maze of the building is one you slip through easily, the long, dark hallways familiar to you from years of roaming around. You knew every door, where every secret was hidden. And how to shut it all down.
Fingers dancing across the keypad, you find the one you’re looking for. Booting up the system, the lights from the screens bathe the room in an eerie glow, and you begin to type.
“Come on, come on,” you muttered to yourself, eyes darting between the screen and the shadows outside. “Almost there…”
Your phone pings to life with a text — shoulders sagging with relief when you see it’s from Chan.
At the servers. Starting data extraction now.
You shoot a reply back quickly – two mins and i’ll initiate the shutdown sequence.
The two minutes pass by in agony, heart pounding out of your chest at the feeling that you could be caught at any time, that this could end.
The lab’s lights began to flicker and dim, casting an eerie glow over the deserted corridors. It worked.
You tiptoe silently out of the room, breaking into a run when you hear the sirens. You run and you run until you’re far enough away, Chan waiting for you a few blocks away.
“We did it,” he smiles, teeth glinting in the moonlight. “We got what we needed.”
He pauses when he sees you tremble, sobs wracking your entire body. You don’t know why the tears started, but they refused to stop when you think about everything – about how you’d just destroyed your family’s entire future, about how you were free, about Changbin.
His name slips from your lips without even thinking, and Chan freezes. 
You hold your breath momentarily, waiting for the bad news to come. But all Chan does is let out a deep sigh of relief, the corners of his lips curling into the faintest hint of a smile.
“Come with me.”
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When Changbin wakes, it’s like the first time all over again. Senses assaulted by a bright light, fear strikes him in the worst way possible. How long had it been since he powered down? Weeks? Months? Had he been captured? Was this the end?
His systems go haywire with the possibilities, until he feels something. A breeze, ruffling his hair. He was outside. 
The abandoned train station materializes amidst the fog of his muddled senses, his fingertips coming away with rust when he brushes them against the old, dilapidated bench. Relief washes over him. He was okay. He’d live another day.
The crunching of gravel startles him from his reverie, and he feels someone plop down next to him on the bench.
Turning to meet his company, he nearly short-circuits when he sees you, face illuminated by the sun’s rays. You’re smiling. At him. 
Changbin tries to form a coherent thought, but everything is jumbled and clunky. The sun. The air. You. You. You.
You offer him something, and he pales when he sees it, an earbud extended to him.
“I need you to listen to something,” you say softly, and his hands shake as he accepts it, watching you hit play.
The first few melodious notes ring in his ears, and a shiver goes down his spine when he realizes what you’d chosen to show him.
Like a streetlight, like a streetlight
At the end of a lonely day, standing vacantly
In the middle of the lonely night, I try my best to smile brightly
It was the song he’d been working on with Jisung and Chan, the first thing he’d had of his own. The first step he’d taken to becoming himself, to becoming just Changbin. He closes his eyes, losing himself to the music, a tear slipping out at the last few notes, when he feels the weight of your head rest on his shoulder.
“I’m so sorry, Changbin,” you sigh, voice wavering, whisper so low he can barely hear it among the reverberations of the final note.
“I want to fix this,” you say again, more resolutely this time, turning so his forehead meets yours. And you feel the dam break, tears flooding both of you as you collapse against each other.
“Wherever you’re going, I want to come with you. I want to show you that you’re more than enough. Because you showed me the same. Please tell me it’s not too late.”
Changbin nods, his tears mingling with a smile of hope. 
“The song. It’s for you. It’s for us. For what we had and what we can still have. I can prove it to you.”
“You don’t need to prove anything, Changbin. You’ve done enough.”
And he had. Somehow, despite having no heart of his own, he’d managed to re-start yours, to show you that you didn’t have to live in the city’s shadows, under the iron grip of your past. That you could be more.
Hope fills your chest – it’s bright and vivid, the force of your love for Changbin knocking you back like a supernova.
Changbin’s fingers brush away the tears on your cheek, shining in the sunlight, and his gaze drops to your lips. You don’t know who leans in first, the next thing you feel being the soft press of his lips to yours. The skin is slightly chapped, but you melt into his touch anyway.
Soon the kiss becomes heated, the roughness of Changbin’s jeans dragging against your thighs as you push yourself onto his lap, prodding the seam of his lips with your tongue. 
Here with Changbin, you realize you’d never really been weak at all. Neither of you had. Not like the world saw both of you. 
Resonance. The ability of an object to match another’s frequency – the ability that you and Changbin now possessed to know whatever the world threw at you, wherever it took you next, you’d come out of it choosing each other every time.  
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a/n pt. 2: they are totally fucking after this btw (i don't make the rules)! all jokes aside, I'm so sorry if this sucks. I genuinely haven't written anything plot driven in over 8 months so I know there was a lot more I could have done and improved on. If you read this, thank you for giving it (and me) a chance. As always, any feedback or comments are much appreciated, but I appreciate you all anyway. Lots of love, Isi 💜
tagging: @jellyleggz
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