#i mentioned to them it reminded me of the aroace flag

[lilcatastrophe]

did my friend @soggyremmy ‘s dtiys of their oc, based on doctor who’s Tardis !! this was such an indulgent piece for me bc so much glow holy shit

he’s a little guy and i love him. very silly 10/10

reference sheet ⬇️

[angieblogging]

yelena belova is aroace.

Yelena Belova is canonically aroace.

Lately people dismissing that has been getting on my nerves VERY much, so I’m making this post lol.

First the terminology:

Aromantic — an individual who doesn’t experience romantic attraction.

Asexual — an individual that doesn’t experience sexual attraction.

AroSpec — spectrum that includes different aromantic identities, from aros who don’t feel romantic attraction to those who do under certain circumstances or rarely.

AceSpec — spectrum that includes different asexual identities, from aces who don’t feel sexual attraction to those who do under certain circumstances or rarely.

*note that some aroace’s choose to use only asexual to define their sexual orientation. not both are and ace, kinda like bisexuals don’t say biromanic, bisexual, just bisexual.*

So first thing i will put here is this;

This in my humble opinion should be enough of a proof, but apparently it is not.

First this part of an interview, the person speaking is a creator/co-creator of Yelena. She says she is most likely to identify as asexual than to follow Nat’s romantic path. Hinting at both aro & ace.

So in the comics Yelena shows no interest dating, as far as i am aware she has no romantic interest in the comics. She is repulsed by sex, she calls herself „nothing” referring to her sexual identity.

As much as many like to say she is a lesbian, she is not, how fucking stupid you sound, honestly. She says it herself, if I said I’m not a lesbian, would you question it? No? Then don’t question her, she says she is not a lesbian, she has no wlw storyline. Drop the fucking lesbian hc.

Some possible foreshadowing in the MCU

1. When she is talking with a widow and a former Ana (show: Hawkeye), there is a line said by the widow accompanying her: „…you and Natasha can be reunited again and live your sex in the city fantasy”.

^ Yelena leaves the room, as soon as the word „sex” is mentioned her face drops, then we have this scene where she’s looking at herself in the mirror.

2. When talking about kids and family (movie: Black Widow) she mentions she wants a dog.

3. When describing „fake story” of her life she made up because her birth certificate was burnt she says Natasha has a husband and talks about her parents, but mentions nothing about her husband or possible spouses or children. (movie: Black Widow)

4. Yelena tends to wear a lot of aro/ace flag colors.

green coat & purple lipstick (green = aro | purple = ace)

yellow & blue colors = aroace flag

Overall Yelena wears a lot of green and white and black together, aromantic flag colors.

^^ can you call that „over the top?” yeah sure… let me remind yall something else:

when enid wore this sweather yall went WILD.

but when Yelena is wearing aroace colors all the time it’s called „reaching”…?

I will continue this with even more, because while you can agree with me and say she is aroace, still there will be people who claim she is aroace, agree, but then this fucking argument comes into place:

„AROS CAN DATE”

„ACES CAN FUCK”

„QPRS EXIST”

Do you see what’s wrong with those sentences? Nothing.

There’s a „but” thoooo…

There is nothing wrong with those, but using those arguments to totally ignore her sexuality ship her and treat her like suddenly she is allo is not it.

Yelena has shown no interest in dating or sex, we can assume she is sex-repulsed as she has shows repulsion to sex and she is to me at least implied to be romance-repulsed.

And we’ve found the problem.

Sex Repulsed Aces are as you can imagine repulsed by sex. Romance Repulsed Aros are repulsed by romance… So how is someone repulsed by said things engaging in said interaction and is not repulsed by them???

I think it’s a great idea to write her into said situations to show she is repulsed and to show it’s okay, because her life, my life, the lives of other uninterested in such thing aro/ace, our lives don’t end here.

Using how some people navigate through their sexuality to justify this is wrong.

You wouldn’t write a lesbian with a man, because bi lesbians exist and she may be a bi lesbian, right?

^ just an fyi, that’s an example, the term bi-lesbian is extremely harmful to both bisexuals and lesbians. check out this for more.

The QPR dilemma is that you don’t understand what a QPR is… it’s not more than friends…it’s not in the middle, it’s out of the regular binary of relationships. Relationships I actually think are QPRs:

Friends with benefits — purely platonic, but you fuck.

Situationship — just friends that do romantic stuff together, unless you call it a romantic relationship, with the other person agreeing on that, it is not one.

QPRs are amazing and beautiful, but it’s not always about fucking and kissing and „acting like a couple” but being a QPR. It can be being friends and living together, not temporary. It can be being friends and co-parenting. It can be many things.

But as I said Yelena is repulsed, why would someone repulsed by sex/romance engage in said thing happily with no doubts, fears, negative feelings just because it’s a qpr, so it’s suddenly fine…?

This is for now all I have to say about this.

As an AroAce, who desires no romantic relationship or a sexual one please please please let us have this representation, for once in our fucking lives.

MORE OF MY POSTS ON YELENA BEING AROACE AND ARO/ACE LINKS LINKED HERE:

asexual/aromantic yelena panels

even when a character is canonically/confirmed aroace there will still be allo romance and allo sex/smut written by them

answering an anon-ask.

more talk about the comic panel.

harmful aro stereotypes.

shipping aroaces + yelena belova.

rant on yelena being aro.

another rant about thunderbolts & yelena.

[nikofortuna]

JTTW Chapter 23 Thoughts

Chapter 23 for the @journeythroughjourneytothewest Reading Group!

Right off the bat the title in the J. F. Jenner version is “Sanzang Does Not Forget the Basic”, which is so casual I find it rather hilarious. It sounds like he is good at Math and put through a middle school Math test.

Right away the German translation brings up an interesting point that Autumn here is a stand-in for aging.

While I’m at it with the season, it also specifies the month in the notes as October! Spooky season! Given what our pilgrims are about to go through rather fitting.

“[D]on’t use the whip” yes, thank you, I do not trust Tang Sanzang with a whip around a horse.

Ah, a little reminder for the reader that this whole thing is an allegory as well.

And we finally get to know what their travelling gear consists of!

The horsey got scared, that doesn’t make him mean! Like what. I feel like Bailong Ma gets way more flag than he deserves whenever he’s actually mentioned and not just left out by the narrative all together.

Tang Sanzang held on this time! I was not expecting that to be honest. Much like Sun Wukong I expected him to go flying off the horse.

Also I see what Sun Wukong did there. He taught Zhu Bajie a practical lesson that while yes the horse can go faster it actually is in Bajie’s own interest for him to trot at a more leisurely pace. Smart monkey.

With it being October in mind and Tang Sanzang’s mention of not entering a place uninvited I can’t help but picture him in a little vampire Halloween costume.

I love the descriptions meant as compliments but appearing silly to foreigners. Hm yes, onions. It’s very funny and interesting as well to think about why that comparison might be considered a compliment.

Tang Sanzang.exe stopped working. Or rather by my guess just doesn’t want to deal with this, which I feel that, I would try to opt out of dealing with something like this as well.

There is quite the meaning to the birthday the Lady Jia is mentioning! Something explained in the German translation. For the year Ding means fire and Hai means water. The month is associated with wood while the hour You belongs to the element of metal. All opposite to each other, so very inauspicious!

Those last lines of Sanzang’s counter-poem were a bit rude, but he’s pretty riled up at the moment, so it shall be forgiven by the audience with hindsight.

Ah Sun “I ain’t staying, my aroace self could never” Wukong.

Zhu Bajie look, his mind was short-circuiting, he’s allowed some slack here. Good on calling him out for being rude though still! Consequences for people’s actions, we love to see them acknowledged!

Ah the only thing Sun Wukong really cares about regarding a wedding is food and drink, such an aroace thing to do.

To be fair they kind of group pressured Zhu Bajie. He may very well had just tried to get them a meal and lodging for the night with some hallow promises and nice words like he told Tang Sanzang he should have done, but they pushed it like he meant it no questions asked. I feel this outcome might have been a bit unfair.

Though Tang Sanzang telling Sun Wukong not to ridicule his little brother like a Dad gave me such a sense of found family.

In general I really enjoy these social interactions, like yeah the fights are nifty too, but love the actual discussions between them and it’s such a treat whenever they really show how close they have grown already.

[if-loki-was-a-fox]

Yeah!! I love all of those details so much, I have spent way too long staring at this image (<- set it as their phone background and then spent the next three days thinking about it constantly, oop)

It also took me far too long to notice Bdub's world up in the corner but I love that it's there, it a nice little reminded of their happier days and just- it's so great. And the fire on Mumbo also reminds me of his Nether lava death that sort of set off everything that happened towards the end of his Secret Life

Also in terms of more generalized design elements, I love the plants in Joel's hair and all the heart and such patches on the sleeves of his hoodie, and I noticed Bdubs seems to have two clocks but one of them is broken? Also Mumbo's ring - I notice it's black like an ace ring, and in your recent ref post for him you put the aroace flag, so I assume that was intentional? btw you're pearl looks so cool I love her and your Mumbo - you are easily one of my top two or three favorite Mumbo artists, he's so perfect

Anyways, full on rambling and BS-ing time: as a side effect of staring at and thinking about this image way too much, I also have overly dramatic and poetic thoughts idk how to articulate that I have read into the poses, with how Mumbo has so clearly fallen by accident and has no control over his fall anymore, which just makes such a good metaphor for his decent at the end of Secret Life. And Bdubs and Joel are diving after him, those to leapt off with intent and they're falling almost on purpose - not to mention Bdbubs reaching out for him, and how he was the one who tried the hardest to talk Mumbo down from hurting them in Secret Life. And then Pearl looks so fond of her Mounders, the family she finally got and followed so determinedly to the end of Secret Life (but also how she's not so much reaching for Mumbo like the other two, rather watching over her Mounders as a whole, kinda like how when Mumbo turned on them she was Concerned firstly for all of their individual safety n the situation and secondly for Mumbo specifically)

Augh the Mounders and Mumbo's descent into distress and distrust and everything just-

I have too many thoughts about the Mounders ;-;

and this fanart encapsulate and represents so many of them so well asdsfshgjffdsdshjfj

I was staring at your Mounders fanart where they're all falling last night (...for far too long while just a liiiittle bit sleep deprived)

And I was curious if you have any notes or thoughts behind the various details to maybe share because there were just so many little things I noticed, and idk how much I missed or how much was me reading too deep into it, but it would be very cool to hear what your intent and thought process was if have any thoughts / remember them

Either way I just really liked that fanart and have Many Thoughts and Feelings! So Many ! I could probably make my own list of notes and observations and reading too deep into its at this point tbh

KEK HELLO THANK YOU if i'm being honest, there aren't than many details (at least i think so), but here are some that i added in conciously that i could remember:

- The falling order is intended! From bottom to the top, it's the order of who died first, so it would be that Mumbo died first, then Bdubs, then Joel and then Pearl.

- The colored squares behind each Mounder is the color they said was their favorite during the episode where Joel (i think) asked everyone what their favorite color was (or what color they would be, i dont remember fully)! The filter makes them look more silly and different though

- Mumbo has fire on him because i associate traffic!Mumbo with fire and burning (mostly due to LL, i can talk about it if anyone is interested /silly)

- I see the whole composition of Mumbo falling into the darkness and away from the light in two different ways:

Him falling into the darkness of death, away from light as everything goes dark yada yada basic perma death stuff, hence the more glitchy feel (basic, boring /j)

Him falling into the darkness of his own mind, feeling like he's alone and doesn't belong where the light is (Mounders) as he falls deeper and deeper (cool, makes me depressed /pos /j), it makes Bdubs reaching out to him more meaningful, with the rest if the Mounders falling to catch him

- Blood coming from Mumbo's head because Warden beat his ass lmao im coping

- traffic!Mumbo makes me incredibly ill so the falling anvil and the task holder thingy is meant to be his :-) or at least stuff that was tied to his character or to the red lifers in general

OTHER THAN THAT i dont think there are any stuff that i fully intended to be small silly details? I would GLADLY listen to any if your thoughts, i love it when people read into my art and see possible references or details that i've accidentally added and didnt even notice :-) also makes me feel so smart actually because i am in fact not

[famous-aces]

Joan of Arc

Who: Jehanne Darc (often modernized as Jeanne d'Arc) (Joan of Arc is the Anglicization of her name)

What: Soldier and Saint

Where: French, active in France

When: c. 1412 - May 30, 1431

(Image Description: an engraving of Joan of Arc from 1903 by Peruvian artist Albert Lynch. It was featured in Figaro Illustre. It looks more like a painting than an engraving. It shows Joan in the center. In the background is Notre Dame. In the mid and foreground is a field of white flowers. Joan is front and center from the thighs up. She is in full plate mail but without the helmet or gloves. The armor has gold accents. She has pale skin and a round face. Her hair is black and cut into a bob with high bangs. One hand holds a flag and one hand rests on the hilt of a huge sword. She looks stoically and proudly out at the viewer. End ID.)

Joan of Arc is more legend than woman at this point, but she was very real. She is in part responsible for turning the tide of the Hundred Years War in France's favor. Now she is both French cultural heroine and canonized Catholic saint. Joan is an icon and inspiration and to millions be they French, Christian, woman, queer, or all of the above.

Joan's story is fairly well known. She was an illiterate peasant girl who, when she was 13, was visited by the visions of several saints. From that point forward she claimed to have been following God's instructions.  At the time, France and England were still locked in the heat of the Hundred Years War (1337-1453) and the English occupied swaths of France. Eventually God told Joan to topple the English occupation and save France. She convinced the Dauphin to give her command over troops and dressed in men's armor Joan lead French victory after victory.

Although there were understandably doubts about what this untrained teenager could actually do she was able to convince naysayers quickly.  She won first success at the Siege of Orléans. After the city was sieged for more than six months, Joan was able to turn away the English in only nine days.  She was involved in more than a half dozen battles, many victories, between 1429 and 1431. These included the French success at the Battle of Patay and the March to Reims. During the latter she helped siege and reclaim several French cities and ensured the coronation of King Charles VII, at which she was in attendance.

She continued her campaign despite being injured in the Siege of Paris and was ultimately captured during the Siege of Compiègne. Her troops were outnumbered and her attempted surprise attack was rebuffed by English reinforcements, at which point she was overwhelmed and pulled from her horse.

She was captured, tried for witchcraft (although crossdressing was listed among her crimes/charges), and ultimately, horrifically, burned at the stake. Because she was so well loved the English made sure her body was very publicly destroyed both to avoid rumors of her escape and to make sure no relics could be made from her remains (as was very common for holy people at the time). Although English propaganda and court proceedings claimed Joan was a witch who spoke not to God and saints but to the Devil, her executioner still "greatly feared to be damned.". She was only 19 at the time of her death.

Joan has become a larger-than-life figure.  Her story has been told and retold countless times over the centuries.  Movies, books, plays, operas, songs, pieces of visual art. Nearly every medium that exists has depicted Joan of Arc in some capacity. For example, the first celluloid movie camera was invented in 1895, the first filmed depiction of Joan of Arc was made in only 1898.  Mark Twain was very proud of his oft forgotten novel Personal Recollections of Joan of Arc. Voltaire wrote the poem "La Pucelle d’Orléans" (link goes to English translation) and there was a dramatic rebuttal by Die Jungfrau von Orleans (German) by Friedrich Schiller. Tchaikovsky wrote an opera The Maid of Orléans. George Bernard Shaw's Saint Joan is perhaps his magnum opus.  Robert Southey and Samuel Taylor Coleridge wrote the epic "Joan of Arc". She is included in Shakespeare's Henry VI Part 1. The likes of Peter Paul Rubins, Paul Gauguin, John Everett Millais, Jean Auguste Dominique Ingres, among others have rendered Joan. She has been used for awards and propaganda.

Joan of Arc even impacted real life fashion, the Bob hairstyle's inventor based the now iconic look off Joan's haircut. It makes sense since the Bob was originally associated with the rebellious women of the 1920s. In 1920 she was canonized and is now the patron saint of France, soldiers, women in the WAVES and WAC, prisoners, among many others.

There is now speculation that Joan of Arc may have been mentally ill or had epilepsy.

(Image Description: a drawing of Joan of Arc by Clément de Fauquembergue found in the margins of a parliamentary document from 1429. That makes this the earliest drawing of Joan we have. It is a brown ink drawing, slightly crude, very simple, of a woman drawn in profile.  It ends just below her midsection. She wears a dress and carries as sword in one hand and a banner in the other. She is scowling. Oddly she does not have the short haircut that would become her trademark look, then again I have no idea how true/untrue to life this is. End ID)

Probable Orientation: Aroace (and obviously GNC. Crossdressing was one of the many crimes for which the English tried her.)

This is already a very long entry because of Joan of Arc's extensive legacy but it is going to get even longer, because I mentioned in Mary Eliza Mahoney's entry that there was another figure I was struggling with in my speculation, here she is. My biggest issue here was more moral than anything else.

Joan was only 19 when she died, that is hardly a full life to determine what her sexual orientation was. I do not object to a teenager self-identifying as any gender/sexual orientation, but it is quite another matter to impose one on them, especially when they died before being able to live a full life.

I thought a lot about the discourse presently surrounding Anne Frank. On my personal blog I have made my opinion abundantly clear (she is not your Bicon, she is a victim of a horrific genocide). So why is Joan different to me? I did some deep soul searching on this. So before going into my evidence as to why Joan of Arc may have been aroace.

The circumstances of their deaths are different. Anne was killed because of her ethnoreligious background in a campaign to wipe out the Jewish people. Joan was brutally killed for her gender and wearing men's clothing as much as she was for being an enemy general.  Indeed, she would not have been burned alive had she been a young man doing exactly what Joan did and not a young woman. But her death is not representative of a larger narrative. There were no other Joans of Arc.

Yes, she is now a Catholic Saint, but unlike Anne Frank Joan was not killed for being Catholic and was killed by other Catholics. Also I should add Judaism is much larger than just a religion. It is an ethnicity as well. Joan was the same ethnicity (if not the same nationality) as her captors.

Anne was also a 20th century girl and 15 when she met her horrible demise. Joan's era and age are something I will expand on.

And importantly I am not the first person to ascribe queerness to Joan's story. She has been a queer figure for the better part of a century by now. Some scholars argue she was a lesbian*. Others say she was nonbinary**. Joan has long been important to the queer community, but that wouldn't necessarily make me right for adding to the debate.

But for Joan of Arc queerness is baked right in to the narrative. She wore men's clothing and broke gender norms, actions so taboo they were part of what cost her her life.  Whether or not this crossdressing had anything to do with her gender or sexual orientation or just done for ease in battle is a subject of debate and boy howdy there is a lot of it. Plus, the actual act of going to war as a woman was an act of gender nonconformity.

Anyway now I am going to tell you why I believe Joan of Arc was an aroace, because it is another piece of the queerness of her narrative that she touted.

Here is one of the most important pieces of evidence to me, her name. Joan's birth name was Jehanne Darc (or a similar spelling), that was her father's surname and it was technically hers. In life she didn't use it. She called herself Jehanne la Pucelle (Joan the Maid) as in Joan the Virgin. That was the name she rallied her troops under. That was how her (dictated) letters were often signed. I have seen the argument made that she was asserting her purity, but it also would remind her troops of her age. Just like today "virgin" held a connotation of childishness. You were not married and inexperienced. Why would a military general want to point out how young she was? She had another name, she could have just been Jehanne Darc. It also told everyone she was a woman, including the enemy, who might use that against her. If she wanted to go with a nickname based on piousness it did not have to be "la Pucelle". There are many that did not imply either gender or age.

Her age is also important. Much like Wang Zhenyi she opted to break convention and do something else when it came time to get married. She was at war at the time when she should have been getting married, French women were generally married between 18 and 25. Her chasteness was noted in that she was only interested in carrying out God's Will. Nothing kept her on the battlefield except her dedication to her cause. She could have retired at any point. Indeed in September of 1429 she was badly injured by a crossbow bolt to the thigh, she had to be dragged from the battlefield and it was only by the king's orders that she did not return to it. She had a mission and marriage did not seem to factor into it. And that, being of marriageable age and not seeking it, would be odd even given her religiousness.

(Image Description: a 1504 painting of Joan on horseback. It is a bright painting on parchment. She is wearing shining armor with a yellow feather in her helmet. She carries a red banner. The horse is white with red and gold accoutrements and is prancing. There are fields and a castle behind her. Joan looks calm. End ID)

The argument could be made that it is impossible to untangle Joan's chastity from her religiousness. But I would argue that there is a way to tell and a way that hers is unique from that of other saints.

Within Catholicism chastity is about sacrifice and self-denial, by being sexless you are giving something up. That is why you will often see saints who are hermits, giving up sex along with everything else. Even saints who die as virgin martyrs (i.e. dying defending their virginity) are generally fending off rape or a marriage that would come between them and God. Unless they are willingly giving themselves up to God Himself chasteness is not supposed to last. Indeed, you are supposed to go forth and multiply and all that.

Officially in Catholic doctrine asexuality does not exist because sexual attraction (to the "opposite sex") is one of God's Gifts.  It is impossible to not feel sexual attraction and be human in their eyes. As per an FAQ on religious life "Question: What do you call a person who is asexual? Answer: Not a person. Asexual people do not exist. Sexuality is a gift from God and thus a fundamental part of our human identity.". Or even more sinisterly as put by former Priest*** and Ugandan Ethics Minister Simon Lokodo when he said he approved of heterosexual child rape more than consentual gay sex "it is men raping girls. Which is natural" the implication being that hetero sex is the only "natural" thing, because even denial is unacceptable. Yes, Lokodo is an extreme example, but it reflects a mindset about heterosexual sex.

Chastity is only venerated in Christianity insofar as you are giving something up for God.  The Christian faith has engineered the acceptable circumstances for sex and you are expected to have it and want it within those circumstances. Joan's maidenhood is traditionally viewed much the same way a nun's is, that she was driven by her love of God and her desire to fulfill His instructions and thus neglected her own desires. It is unthinkable that maybe she just didn't care, that she would rather be a warrior than a wife. She would be far less beloved if that was the widely agreed on conclusion, I assure you.

(Image description: Jeanne D'Arc (1874) a gilded bronze statue by Emmanuel Frémiet now at the Place des Pyramides, Paris.  Commissioned by Napoleon III and standing 13 feet tall. It shows a triumphant Joan of Arc on horseback with her banner held high. Both she and her horse wear armor. End ID)

*The argument for this is actually pretty weak. The one thing I have seen used as evidence of her being definitively a lesbian is that she shared her bed with women. But this was the 15th century, bedsharing was extremely common, there weren't many beds to go around, whole peasant families might share a bed. Yes, it could mean something, but Occam's Razor, in an era when nonsexual bedsharing was common this is not proof this is was for sexual reasons, there is no reason Joan would be an exception. Without any other evidence she was a lesbian this is not enough to prove she was attracted to women.  I am not saying it isn't possible, I am just saying that is not enough to go on.

**In her being GNC. Again, a possibility, but not definitive. Of course this stuff rarely is.

***He was removed from the priesthood when he entered politics as it is against Vatican law to hold both positions, it had nothing to do with his horrific stance on Queer Rights.

(Image Description: Jeanne d'Arc écoutant ses voix by Léon François Bénouville [done before 1859]. It is a painting that shows Joan when she first was visited by Saints/Angels. It shows Joan in layered but undecorated clothing. She is clutching what appears to be part of a loom or other wool working equipment in one hand. The other holds her wrist. She is white and pale and barefoot. Her hair is dark and partially pinned back, starting to come free. She has a round face and looks shocked, her doll like mouth agape in a gasp and her light eyes wide. She is seated on a rock with a field behind her, dotted with sheep and a horse. Far beyond her in the distance is a burning city. In the air around her in an immense sky are the flying and translucent forms of angels. They have their mouths open, calling to her. One offers her a sword another carries a flag/banner. End ID.)

Quotes:

"Jehanne la Pucelle"

-How Joan signed her dictated letters and referred to herself, "Joan the Maid".

"Alas! that my body, clean and whole, never been corrupted, today must be consumed and burnt to ashes!"

-Joan of Arc after being condemned to death, quoted by Jean Toutmouille

(Image Description: a still from La Passion de Jeanne d'Arc (The Passion of Joan of Arc) a silent film from 1928. It is widely regarded as a masterpiece and a landmark of early cinema. Renée Jeanne Falconetti (Joan) is still hailed for her performance. In this image we see Joan kneeling in front of the stake. She is wearing a wool robe and clutching a cross. The anguish on her face is indescribable. Behind her is an armed guard.  End ID)

[dr-gloom]

FandersPrideMeetup Week 2: Representation. You Are Not Alone

Week 2 of @fander-pride-meetup: Representation- Draw/Write/Edit/Express yourself with the Sides/TSCharacters to represent your LGBTQ+ experiences!

A/N: So this is basically just the story of my first Pride (which I went to this year) told through the sides with a few small tweaks. I chose Roman cause I made a post about how important it is to some of us to see Aro!Roman content and a lot of people have agreed with me so here we are

Fandom: Sanders’ Sides

Pairing: none

Words: 1,335

Summary: Roman’s both excited and nervous for his first Pride. With all the discourse online, and so many people telling him he doesn’t belong at Pride because he’s aroace, he can’t help but let his imagination run away with him. What if a TERF comes up to him and starts something? What if a fight breaks out? What if he’s kicked out of Pride because he isn’t “oppressed enough”?

Tags/Warnings: aroace Roman, trans Roman, genderfluid Roman, Pride, anxieties, genderfluid Remy, trans Patton, Patton is pre-T and Roman and Remy are on T, mentions of top surgey/post-op

Read it on AO3

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Roman groans, the hot June sun beating down on them and making them regret dressing for the aesthetic. This was their first-ever Pride event, and they’d wanted to look badass for the parade they were marching in. They were wearing their tye-dye trans shirt they’d made a year ago, their aro flag over their shoulders and dark wash skinny jeans that were tucked into their new military-grade combat boots. They’d jokingly called them their “TERF-kicking boots”, getting plenty of supportive high fives from the other Kaiser volunteers they were marching with.

They fanned themselves with the paper fan someone had handed them while they all waited to march, saying for probably the tenth time that morning, “It’s too damn hot.” They turned to their friend Remy, who was fanning themselves as well, though they were dressed in more weather-appropriate in short shorts and rainbow socks. “I wish I remembered my water.” Remy pats them on the shoulder.

“Don’t worry babe, I’ve got water if you need any.”

“I brought some frozen water bottles! You want one?”

Roman turns around to look at the shorter man behind them. Patton, they think his name is? “Oh uh, sure! Thank you Patton.” Patton smiles and nods, handing Roman a frozen water bottle that they immediately press against their neck. They groan at the cool mercy on their skin, making Remy and Patton laugh.

                                    ___________________________

“Woooooooooo~!” Patton cries, along with the rest of their group and the audience they pass by. Roman and Remy share a look, laughing.

“Wee-snaaaaaw~!” Roman cries, laughing at how pitchy their voice sounds. Not even five minutes in, Roman and Remy realized that they could no longer “woo” loudly since the T was changing their voice. Maybe in a year or two when it stopped, but for now?

“Wee-snaaawww~!” Remy crows, immediately cackling at the confused looks they received.

Roman unties the aro flag from around their shoulders, the fabric doing nothing to cool them off. Instead they hold it out in front of themselves, trying not to pay too much attention to the audience. The same thoughts that had been plaguing their mind for days come to the front of their brain. What if someone sees them carrying this flag and harasses them? What if they get pushed? Their chest is still healing, they can’t afford to get in a fight.

“Woooooo~!” Patton cries loudly right behind them, silencing their thoughts. Roman laughs shakily and looks around. They’ll be fine.

They aren’t alone anymore.

“I love your flag!!!”

Roman beams.

                                  _____________________________

When they reach the end of the line and everyone starts dispersing, Roman takes Remy’s hand to make sure they aren’t separated in the crowd. The two of them, along with Patton and his mom, find the nearest shade and settle down for a moment. Roman lays out their flag in the grass and bodily collapses on top of it, laying on their stomach. It’s only then that they remember that they’re in fact healing from top surgery, and ow that hurts, why did they do that?

Roman sits up with a pained hiss, a hand over their left pec where it feels like they just got punched. Yeah, they fucked up. In their defense, they were super tired, hot, and possibly dehydrated.

“You okay, babe?” Remy frowns at them, hunching over a little to look Roman in the eyes. Roman does their best to give Remy a reassuring smile. “I forgot I’m not supposed to lay on my stomach. I feel like I just got punched in the tit.” Remy gives a sympathetic hiss, their face scrunched up in pain. “You good though?”

“I don’t know, it hurts like a bitch.”

Paton frown from beside them. “Maybe you should check it?”

Roman looks around. Lift their shirt, in public, and take their binder off? Their heart beats a little faster, and they have to remind themselves that it’s fine. This is Pride, they don’t have boobs anymore, and this is a health concern. Roman nods, lifting their shirt and pulling the velcro aside to take off their binder.

Everything looks the same; almost-flat chest, tape covered stitches… Roman prods at their sensitive flesh. It seems kind of tough, but that’s probably just swelling, right? They pointedly ignore a passing girl going, “Oh, gross” and put their binder back on. After fixing their shirt, they smile at Remy and Patton. “It’s fine. Why don’t we head to the festival?”

                                     __________________________

“They’re blocking this entrance, too?” Roman grouses, starting to get really annoyed. And yeah, they get why people are protesting. The city had taken away their ban on uniformed cops at Pride and tons of people were pissed, but… “They do realize the only people they’re hurting by blocking all the entrances is their fellow LGBT, right? Like, we had no say in this shit, hell, I don’t want uniformed officers here either, but I still want to have fun.”

Remy nods at their side with a frown. “This is getting kinda redic. We’ve been walking around for twenty minutes now looking for an opening.”

Roman holds their hand out and Remy takes it without a second thought, letting Roman lead them through the crowd. The two keep walking, passing by a cop who was talking with some other people looking for an entrance. As soon as they round the corner, they see a large black woman dragging a knife back and forth over the zipties keeping the fence up around the festival. Roman slows to a stop, Remy at their side watching curiously. The ziptie snaps and the woman pulls at the fence, but it doesn’t move much. By this point, they’re starting to draw a bit of a crowd. Roman speaks up. “See that thing on the ground? You gotta pull the fence up- there you go.” They grin as she lifts the fence, freeing it from the stand and pushing it open. Roman rushes forward with Remy and the rest of the crowd, everyone spilling through the gap like water on a sinking ship.

Roman is practically giggling with glee, their steps almost like little hops with the sudden surge of excitement in their veins. They look back at Remy, who’s got a matching grin on their face. As they pass the metal storage crates and get closer to the festival they catch up to the woman, calling out a “Thank you!” and running off.

                                     ___________________________

Roman walks away from the stall pouting, dragging their feet.

“Not here either?” Remy asks, but pity and amusement in their eyes.

“No! You’d think one booth would have more flags than just- just the basic L-G-B-T! That’s so basic! What the hell!”

Remy pats their shoulder sympathetically. “Babe, we’ve been walking around for like… An hour. You’re hungry, you’re out of water, and your feet hurt, yeah?” Roman nods. “Then let’s get something to drink at least and then maybe we’ll go.” Roman sighs and nods again.

“Yeah, okay, let’s go.”

They’d gotten their drinks and walked around once more to make sure they saw everything, stopping at at least half the booths to spin their free-stuff wheels. Roman saw a girl walking around with an ace flag draped over her shoulders like a cape and their face lit up.

“I love your flag!!!”

                                    _____________________________

“So how did it go?” Roman’s mother’s voice flows from the speakers of their car. Roman grins. “It was pretty good. The parade was really fun, and I got some free stuff. Met some really cool people. There was a guy there dressed as gay Satan! It was so awesome, he was like, rainbow everything. I got some good pictures.”

Roman’s mother laughs. “I’m glad you had fun. I’ll see you at home?”

“Yeah mom, see you at home.” Roman smiles as they hang up, reflecting on their day. They had no idea what they’d been so worried about. No one had bothered them, or questioned why they were there. In fact, they weren’t the only aroace there!

They weren’t alone anymore.

[crackmadhi]

Day 30 - Accepted

Saturday, 5 May 2012 – Age 13 Aura opened the apartment door and threw her keys on the drawer next to the door. On it was a mess out of various clothing pieces neither of the siblings had put away. She grumbled to herself already feeling that it would be on her to take on that task.

Lazily she slandered into the kitchen where Simon leaned onto the counter watching her as she entered. His hands were hidden in the black hoody, he was wearing and his long bangs hid part of his eyes and the weariness in them.

Worried Aura frowned and got closer to him watching him taking a deep a breath and a small shiver going through his body.

“What is it? Did you knock up a girl or what?” she half-heartedly joked but swallowed any more comments instantly, as she saw him flinch strongly.

“I have something to tell you.”

He swallowed nervously with his voice even and smooth. Aura nodded and crossed her arms in front of her chest. This was unlike him.

“You told me to think outside the norms and let myself live outside of these buckets and… I- I looked stuff up because you know so much of it and I wanted to know more and… I read about something and I felt like it described me quite well, but I wasn’t sure if this was just a moment thing so I waited, because it could change quickly, because I’m a teenager and hormones and stuff but- But it’s been almost three months. And it doesn’t change. And so, I guess it might stay like this for a while, so…”

He stopped and looked to his sister like a fearful deer.

“It’s fine. I’m not gonna shout. I won’t be mad”, she said and stepped towards him uncrossing her arms.

He bit his lips, fear glistering in his eyes yet he opened his mouth and finished: “I think I’m asexual and aromantic.”

Confused Aura looked at him. He started hyperventilating and she softly laid her hand on his chest, slowly breathing in and out with him. Slowly he recovered and she tilted her head and let out a laugh.

“And I thought you were going to tell me something dramatic and world-changing.”

Simon’s well broke down and he started to sob: “You’re not disappointed?”

“What for?” she asked him and took him in her arms.

“For- for not being able to fall in love?” he stammered looked up to her. “For maybe never bringing home someone? For just… being like this?”

“Oh lord”, she said and cupped his wet cheeks, “what would I care about the people you bring home or do not bring home? You never question the women I bring along, so why do you think I would do that with you? I don’t care if you’re are ace or aro, or both. I don’t care if it’s forever or a phase. It’s you and you’re just fine as long as you’re happy with yourself! And if you say you are aromantic and asexual and you felt like this for several months already, then that is awesome! You’re awesome!”

And beyond the tears there finally came his smile back.

Trembling he put his arms around her and cried in her chest. He was relieved. She didn’t hate him. She didn’t police him. She just…

“Hey do you think you might be agender as well? Then you’d be a triple A!” Aura teased and he snorted in her chest.

Tears, now from laughing, in his eyes he looked up and said with a smirk: “You’re horrible.”

Saturday, 30 June 2046 – Age 47 Simon put the salad on the table and walked back into the kitchen to see if Nahyuta needed help. As he entered, they walked towards him with the soup in their hands and nodded towards the bread on the counter. Simon understood and went to grab the bread before he followed his partner.

Once in the living room Penda immediately called for her brother.

“Tuma! Lunch! Now!”

Simon glanced over to Nahyuta and they exchanged an amused grin. The boy promptly came in and stretched his arms. He might have lain in bed until now, reading a manga or two and maybe also flick through some psychology books. Maybe a little strange for a soon twelve-year-old, but then again not so strange considering the people he lived with.

“What are we having?” he asked with a wide smile directed to Nahyuta and hopped on his chair.

They didn’t even bother answering, as Tumaini did it himself and commented on the soup with contentment. Enthusiastically he held out his plate and asked Nahyuta to give him some soup. The followed order and went on with Simon’s plate next.

“Thank you”, he said low-key and watched them giving themselves a ladle.

“I can take it myself, thank you!” Penda said and motioned for the ladle.

Nahyuta handed it to her and she served herself and then they all could finally dive in. Simon was eating the slowest, waiting for the soup to cool down a bit and watching his two children happily. Penda was rushing a bit more than usually. She wanted to go to meet up in the library with her learn group in an hour and she hated it to be late.

“It’s the 30th of June”, Tuma mentioned at once and eyed up to both grown-ups.

Nahyuta eyed Simon and then turned to their son: “Yes, that is correct. Are you reminding us of your birthday on the 3rd? We didn’t forget that, don’t worry.”

Tuma shook his head and glanced up at Penda with an eye roll, which she answered with a shrug.

“I know you won’t forget my birthday! You never did! I mean because it’s the end of Pride month. I just remembered and we haven’t done a lot besides visiting the parade. Are you sad because of that? – He looked to Simon – You always seem to enjoy it so much and I feel like we didn’t celebrate it that much this year…”

Simon grinned. The second year Tumaini and Penda had been around, the little boy had cross knotted him and Nahyuta bracelets in their respective flags’ colours for pride month. It had come absolutely unexpected for them and Simon wore them everyday until one tore apart and Tumaini made him a new one.

That was four years ago and every year after that he had thought of something small to do for them during this time. And quite honestly? That gesture from a little boy, who had grown up around two homophobic and transphobic parents, meant a lot to Simon. It was even nicer since Penda had started to properly help him with it two years ago, when she had bought the food dye and made cookies in the colours in the non-binary and aromantic colours.

In these moments, Simon felt warm. He felt at peace and at home. There had been a lot of hardship in his life. Naturally, not everything was tied to his identity and it didn’t have to be quite frankly.

It usually just made things harder to not quite fit in a sex- and amanormative society as an aroace dude.

And yet, by now…

He was fine with it. He was fine because he didn’t have to fight everyday to get acceptance and kindness for himself. He was fine because he had support and could give support to the lovely person next to him, who used they/them pronouns for almost 16 years now. He was fine because he had his people around him and a family he had never expected to have.

He was fine not celebrating Pride excessively this year because he didn’t need celebrating his identity. No, he could live his identity every day of the year and that was a privilege he knew to cherish more than anything else.

It was why he still loved pride month a lot. It was for the people, who needed to celebrate their identity at least during this time, because they couldn’t live their identities. Because they were rejected by their families, laughed and stared at and couldn’t be vocal about themselves. Or didn’t want to be open about it, which was fine too.

Pride month was for the people who he used to be like. And of course also still for him but he didn’t need this focus anymore and in a way he had his own Pride at home every single day when he came home and was accepted by his qpp, daughter and son.

  “I’m happy as it is. But if you want, we could make a pan cake for uncle Klav. He might be moved to tears like last year, yeah?”

 Heeeey! This is the end! I didn't manage to reach my goal and post a chapter everyday, but I'll add the missing ones in the next days^^ It was just too damn hot and I've prewritten this chapter a while ago, because it is meant to end a circle. We started with Denied and end with Accepted and I hope that's a journey all of us can go through one day^^

Anyway. Thank you for sticking around, please leave a comment if you got the time, take care and have a wonderful day.

Link

[acilykos]

Same, op, same. It makes me so, SO mad and uncomfortable when I see him being shipped. He’s a canonically loveless AroAce (I wrote a damn essay about it because people will bend over backwards to find reasons to ship him.)

And the literal double standards! Neither Ryusui nor Francois ever were mentioned to be (in Ryu’s case) bi+, or (in Francois case) non-binary/genderqueer, the work itself however confirms it, just like it does with Senku.

Plus I feel like many, many of those who go for the “queer platonic relationship” part don’t understand what qpr are because they treat them like any allo romance, which they aren’t, that’s why they’re called queer platonic in the first place.

Also friendly reminder: I read Senku’s timeline in the fanbook. He’s as single as it gets! At other places I also haven’t found any mentions of him being in any romantic relationship either and considering that Inagaki said Senku is “inconsiderate of other people’s feelings”, he definitely never will enter a relationship, that’s as “he doesn’t want/need a (romantic) relationship” as it can get for those who cry for a creator’s comment.

Also fun fact: The two closest relationships Senku has are with Byakuya and Xeno! His father and his mentor. And his favourite treasure is the Kingdom of Science flag!

Something I really don't like is when senku is constantly shipped (even queer platonically as he's loveless but im mostly gonna be talking about romantically). And when people say he's aroace, some will say that it's "more of a headcanon".

Like, no. Senku being aroace is represented in the same way as all the other lgbtqia+ characters in Dr Stone. If that's the logic you're going to use then technically all the other queer characters aren't canonically queer despite being so obviously so.

Some people (only allos that I've seen so far), will say "but aroaces can still date!" which is true, but all I'm getting from it is "I just want an excuse to give them allo experiences". Also, senku is in no way interested in romance/sex. He is also very much loveless aroace.

I just really hate when allos cover up queer rep that isn't meant for them.

[mythicaldemigoddess-of-deltarune]

I Only Signed Back To Fix That Last Post I Made

I only signed back in, because after checking my last post,

that I had posted some hours ago.

I notice I made a mistake, but I fixed it and even edited the title of the post that now has “edited” to show it has been edited.

Friday really wasn’t the best day, and talking about what hurt me in the past might cause me not to....well you know, not pick up right away that I made a mistake that I didn’t notice on time, like even if ya write a post, it can end up being catch on time.

lucky I went to check for any mistakes...

I’m glad that I make sure to have time for myself, at times it’s best for me to be alone...even if I have those who care about me.

I know I had mention this before, like another place I go to.

that I think I might match my spirit animal the deer a little too much...

yeah I’m a Aroaceflux and My Spirit Animal is a Deer.

it reminds me of one of my favorite characters, of course he is Aroace

but not the the flux type.

I was going to wait to post the flag that has to do with my sexuality, but I think there is no harm in posting it now.

I still plan to post it over at another place too.

 I even posted two versions of the flag over at another place

so this would be the third version.

and let me make things clear, just because I have Semi-Androphobia,

doesn’t mean I can’t still be friends with guys I can trust.

the same can be for a guy who has Semi-Gynophobia

but he only lets gals he trusts to be around him.

but with other gals, not so much.

not unless he gets to know them and trusts them enough

but if they do something to break that trust, he may end up seeing them as one of those gals that can’t be trusted and to be scared of.

and it’s okay that not everyone believes in a past life, but it is possible that being killed too young in a past life more than once, can be harmful to the soul.

in theory, it can possibly make the soul very fragile.

by the way, I might of not mentioned it on here but now that I remember it,

I think I should think about the whole becoming a Ma-Acolyte

if I remember right, it the “Ma” might stand for Mother of All Angels.

(which is what I believed the Ma stands for.)

but I’m not sure, I will need to try to double check sometime.

one person I didn’t mention in the post before this one...

is the one who made me feel bad about me believing in a Goddess

and me being Female/Non-Binary  (Gyno-Agender)

they kept misusing a word towards me, and whenever I pointed that out how bad it was making me feel, they still ended up saying the same thing...

so I had to block them, I can’t remember what the name they went by but I remember the actions they did.

  also I don’t go by straight, gay, bi or pan.

I go by Pomosexual/romantic, well for me it would be Pomo-Aroaceflux

which will show on the flag I made.

and I guess now that I think about it, there might of been signs that I had a negative side with the whole romance thing...

like one time there was these two people, a guy and girl

making out right next to me and it was bothering me and it was making me mad.

there was a time and place for that kind of affectation but where we were was not the place for that.

they were being insensitive and they could of found another place to do that, but instead they ended up doing that in front of everyone.

 making out in a place they shouldn’t and making me feel uncomfortable.

not like they cared anyway,

all they cared about was their own lust for each other

and not considering what they were doing was making anyone uncomfortable.

there can be the good and bad ways to show romance to someone your in a relationship with, and those two whoever their names were, were showing the bad side of it.

plus who says that you need to be the type of romantic everyone sees everyday.

sure you can be affectionate, but there will be times when ya don’t want to be all kissy or be touched and need to have space.

you still care about them but they will know when you don’t want to be the other type of romantic and need space, and if you should be together, it should be to just enjoy each other’s company, to just watch a movie or play a video game.

I don’t think I am ready to enter a relationship, because the ones I liked but didn’t like me back or there being others who did like me but left me really confused and I thought I was starting to like them back but it might of been just feeling flattered.

plus now that I think about it, would it even be possible for me to enter one?

after all I had just found out that I’m technically soul-engaged

to someone who ain’t even on earth...-__-

not to forget that I found out that it is a arranged marriage, so it must of still been that way even during my other past lives.

which means that even when I am reborn, I’m still tied to the one I am in a arranged marriage with, my Soul-Betrothed.

  maybe I should try not to worry about it too much...

anyway I will post up the flag I drew up,

then I will go back to having time to myself.

[aroaceconfessions]

I have this second cousin who's just a year older than me. She's my favourite cousin (really big family so no one takes offense that I'm open about having a favourite) and I love her. We only see each other for a couple of days every summer but we're constantly together during those two days, to the point it's a running joke in the family that we're practically fused at the hip. Every time I came out, she was the first person in the family I told. Except she couldn't come last summer so I couldn't tell her that I'm aro (she already knows I'm ace).

And she's made me bracelets (threads woven together, kinda like friendship bracelets). For the first one I asked for the colours of the ace flag (explicitly telling her what it was) and the second one I sent her the aroace flag as reference but didn't tell her what it meant because I didn't want to come out by message unless she asked. I got the second one through her parents last summer and apparently she was very insistant to them that they get it to me. Those bracelets are very important to me because they're a constant reminder that I'm not alone, both in my experiences as aroace and in general since they're from her but I haven't told her that. Knowing her, I wouldn't be surprised that she figured out what the second flag means.

So I had the thought that maybe, just maybe, this summer when I see her she will give me one with the aro flag. And if she does I'll probably cry and definitely hug her. To be honest, I'll probably cry and definitely hug her just from seeing her again anyway.

Also, I think she might be a-spec too. Because why else would she seriously ask herself if she's into girls only for the answer to be 'nah' ? And we never really spoke of boys or girls and as far as I know she's never dated anyone (she's 19) and she's never mentioned a crush to me either when other cousins whom I'm less close to have so... I don't know, that's kind of suspect.

So, yeah, I just really wanted to go on a rant about how much my favourite cousin means to me.