#i mean we'd still need to ask the families if they'd be okay with something like that

[noperopesaredope]

#dahmer was a loser who was moderately handsome and white #which is seemingly enough to make morons cream themselves years later #demystifying serial killers

It’s interesting that people seem to simp after a 6/10 white guy whilst completely disregarding the lives of his victims, 11 of whom were black 🤔

Since the new danhmer seris is out, I want to remind everyone don’t be wild with this. Don’t make fanpost about him, Fanfics or fancams/edits.

He is not a fictional character or a good person, but was an evil real asshole.

Remember to be adults or at least mature. Don’t idolize this man. Idolizing him will be disrespectful to these young men.

These young men who had dreams and so much to live for. Never forget them.

[avatar-anna]

Building a Home

part two to failure

Young dad!Harry x Young mom!Reader universe

*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.

"Can I get you anything?"

"No. No, I'm okay, thanks."

"Oh. Well, there's a, uh, there's a jacuzzi outside if you want to go in now. Or later, obviously. But it might be fun to—to relax or something."

"I think I just want to lie down for a bit."

"Right. Of course. I might go to the store, then. Buy a couple things for the week."

"Okay."

Harry didn't know what to say. He'd never been at a loss for words around Y/n. For so many years, they'd been best friends as well as parents and husband and wife. They told each other everything, and now they could barely have a conversation.

As a way to rekindle things, Harry's mother offered to watch the kids while he and Y/n went on a little trip. Harry was unsure at first, not wanting to be away from his kids after returning home, but he was also willing to do anything if it meant that they could break past speaking more than a few words to each other, so he settled for a cabin that was close enough to drive home in case of emergency.

Y/n had been civil to Harry since he came home. She smiled when he played with Simone and Collette and sat next to him at the dinner table, but once everyone was settled for bed, a wall went up around her, and while they still got in the same bed at the end of the night, the distance between them was palpable. Harry understood why, and he respected Y/n enough to grant her her space, but he missed her so much his chest ached. He just wanted to hold her hand, to see that smile directed at him.

The drive up to the cabin was painfully quiet, but he just kept reminding himself that Y/n came. That had to mean she wanted this to work.

He held onto that tiny scrap of hope as he perused the aisles of the general store, as he checked out, and as he returned to the cabin and made dinner for the two of them.

Y/n eventually came out of the bedroom and quietly began helping Harry with dinner, not a word leaving her lips. He desperately wanted to say something to try and break the ice, but nothing came to mind.

After dinner, Harry and Y/n got ready for bed in silence. They stood beside each other as they brushed their teeth, Harry glancing to his left every couple seconds, hoping this stalemate would be broken somehow. But as they got into bed once again without a single word shared, he wondered if they should've just stayed home.

*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.

"I, uh, I spoke to the owner of the cabin this morning," Harry said.

Y/n looked over at him from where she was reading on the couch. "Oh? Why?"

Harry scratched the stubble on his cheeks. "I asked if we'd have to pay full price if we decided to leave early. He said yes, but that's fine."

Frowning, Y/n set her book down and said, "Why would we leave early?"

"Because we've been here for nearly three days and we've hardly spoken to each other, Y/n. We could easily do that at home."

"So that's it? You're just going to give up after a few days of the cold shoulder?"

"Y/n, I am willing to do anything to make things right, to prove to you that I want to be a part of this family, but you won't let me!" he said. "And I know that you're angry and you're hurt, and you have every right to be, I know that, but I can't begin to right my wrongs if you don't talk to me."

He walked to where she was sitting on the couch and rested his hands over hers. Y/n was crying, but she wouldn't look at him.

"You left us," she said. "When you were faced with the truth, you left. Instead of staying and being what we needed, what I needed, you left us! You—You left me.” Her voice broke on the last word, like despite all they went through, she never expected him to let her down like that. “And I—I have hated you for it ever since you left.”

Harry bowed his head. He knew deep down that Y/n resented him, but to hear it was an entirely different thing. "You told me to go."

"I wanted you to fight for this family! For me! But you took the easy way out, and now I don't know how to talk to you. I don't know how to exist around you!"

She stood up from the couch and walked toward the stairs that led to their bedroom. "So no, Harry, I'm not talking to you, because I'm scared I'll say anything that'll ruin things for good."

Harry let her go, sitting down on the floor with his back against the couch. His own tears fell freely now that she was gone. Any hope he had crumbled into dust.

*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.

Alone in their room, Y/n let herself cry.

Harry was trying, he really was, but he just didn't get it. After touring for nearly an entire year, he just left again. She knew she told him they should take a break, but she'd hoped he would stay and try to mend things. If not for her sake, then for the four children they had together. But instead he just...gave up.

Anne came around a lot, and had become the go-between for Y/n and Harry. She was the one who set up video chats for Simone, Collette, and the twins, she told Harry about how things were back home, and she was the one Y/n confided in when she felt overwhelmed by anger and sadness.

And boy was Y/n angry. It was easier to be angry than to sit around and cry, which she had no time for as it was. Now she was having a hard time letting go of her anger. Harry was home now, and he was putting in every stitch of effort with the girls and Julian. He got the girls ready for school, he changed every diaper, he made dinner, he cleaned up around the house. He was exactly the man Y/n had been hoping for months ago. Why couldn't he have been that man before?

In the cabin's bedroom, Y/n rummaged through Harry's things for the sweater she knew he brought just for her. It had been one of her favorites to wear around the house, before he left and while he was gone, but she would never admit that to him. It was at the bottom of his bag, though when Y/n plucked it out, she saw something left there. A scrap of paper.

Without really thinking about it, Y/n took it.

It was a folded piece of paper, worn, like Harry took it everywhere. She hesitated for a moment, then unfolded it, curious to know what was written on the inside.

It was song lyrics, a song Y/n had never heard before. Her eyes scanned over it briefly, recognizing Harry's handwriting and all the little scribbles where he took a misstep while writing the song and arrangements for music were scribbled on the sides. She looked at everything but the lyrics themselves, scared to know what Harry had written while he was gone. But curiosity finally won out, and Y/n glanced at the words Harry had been carrying with him for months.

"I'm in my bed, and you're not here. And there's no one to blame but the drink in my wandering hand. Forget what I said, it's not what I meant. And I can't take it back I can't unpack the baggage you left."

Y/n mulled over each word carefully, trying to enter Harry's headspace as he wrote this song. She wondered how long they had been separated before he wrote this. Was it when he had just left or had weeks or months gone by? She wasn't sure, but by just the first few lines she could almost physically feel this pain.

She kept reading. Over and over again she read each word until she had them memorized, until they were carved into her heart. Of course Y/n knew that the separation wouldn't have been easy for Harry. Despite his schedule, she knew he adored each and every one of his kids; she knew he loved her. But to see with her own eyes how absolutely wrecked he was by his own failings hurt. This was never meant to be how their lives turned out. They were always supposed to lean on each other and survive as a family because they loved each other and wanted this life, but somewhere along the way, that got lost.

And Y/n could feel the regret of losing sight of what mattered most in the song. She could tell how much he blamed himself for everything that happened.

"And I get the feeling that you'll never need me again."

They hadn't spoken much since he came home. Not of how they felt while they were apart, nor of how they planned to move forward. But Anne had once mentioned that Harry felt as though Y/n and the family would be better off without him. Y/n was still so angry at him for leaving that she didn't think much of it. But now, sitting alone in a room with Harry in the same house but still as far away from her as he'd ever been, she understood. He was wrong, of course, Y/n would always need him, would always want him around, but she understood that one's biggest fears could cloud judgment.

Harry had messed up a lot, but he'd also been right downstairs. If Y/n was done, there was no use moving around each other awkwardly day after day. She owed it to herself and to Harry to make a decision, even if it did hurt them.

*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.

Y/n found Harry sleeping on the couch, his legs hanging over one of the arms. He was still in his day clothes, clearly not wanting to enter the bedroom if she was there. Her heart sunk at the sight of tear tracks on his cheeks, knowing she was the one that caused them.

She wanted to make room for herself next to him, curl up into his chest and have a good night's sleep for the first time since he'd left months ago. She wanted to kiss him, run her hands through his hair, hold him close, but something inside of her held her back.

Their relationship was a mess that Y/n didn't know how to clean up. She didn't know where to start, didn't know if she could believe him when he said that things could be different. But she reminded herself that she came with him on this trip because she owed it to herself to try. Despite everything, Y/n loved him, would forgive him the second he got down on his knees and begged, which was why she'd been putting so much distance between him and herself.

But it had gone on long enough. They needed to talk this through. They needed to get everything out and see where they landed by the end of it.

Cautiously, Y/n went over to Harry and gently nudged his shoulder. He woke up in an instant, startled by her sudden appearance. "What is it? What's wrong?" he said, voice slightly slurred from sleeping.

"Nothing. I just...I just don't want you to think that I hate you," she said, unable to meet his gaze. She'd been avoiding holding eye contact for weeks, not strong enough to see everything he felt in them.

Harry sat up and offered her a spot on the couch, and Y/n took up a place on the opposite end. Outside of sleeping in the same bed, it was the closest they had been to each other in months outside of a hug when he first came home.

"I wouldn't blame you if you did," he said quietly.

She hated that he believed it, hated that she'd let him believe it. "I was furious, and I'm still a little angry, but I don't think I could ever truly hate you, Harry."

"I'm sorry," he said. Y/n could tell that he wanted to come closer, but he stayed exactly where he was, nervously fiddling with the rings on his fingers. She still couldn't meet his gaze, so she focused on his hands, finding it easier to look there while they had this conversation. "I'm so sorry, Y/n. If I could go back and change...everything I would. You were right to be angry with how I've handled my career on my own, and you have every right to be short with me. There's no excuse for how things played out, or how I dealt with you confronting me about it. I got scared and insecure and I let myself believe you deserved someone better than me, when all you needed was for me to be a partner. That's all you've ever asked of me, and you were right to say that I'd failed. And...And I'm sorry."

Would she have forgiven him all those months ago if Harry had said that at the time? Y/n wasn't sure. But the Harry sitting across from her seemed to truly understand where she was coming from, and he was owning up to his mistakes. If she didn't extend an olive branch now, there would be no coming back from that.

*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.*.

For the first time in months, Y/n met Harry's gaze. Her eyes looked blank, though Harry knew it was only because she was heavily guarded. He apologized and would continue to apologize for the rest of their lives, but she had to let him back into it first. And he honestly wasn't sure if she would.

With a blink, Y/n surprised him by saying, "I found this."

She reached across the space between them on the couch to hand him a folded-up piece of paper. He didn't have to open it to know what it was.

Harry wrote the song at one of his lowest points during their separation. A month had gone by, and he still hadn't heard from Y/n. He FaceTimed with Simone, Collette, and the twins almost every day, but Y/n didn't send him so much as an email. After a month, Harry realized that this separation was truly indefinite, and that there was a real possibility things wouldn't be fixed by the end of it. For the first four weeks, Harry hoped that he could come home and work things out, but when a month had passed, reality kicked in.

He'd written the song at a time when he'd felt truly hopeless, when every mistake he'd ever made as a father and a husband gnawed at him. He was facing the reality that he might lose the family he loved more than words could describe, and the thought alone destroyed him.

Seeing the paper now brought back those memories, and now he had a hard time meeting Y/n's eyes. "I must've left it in my bag after I came home."

"I read it," Y/n said. "I hope you don't mind."

Harry figured as much, seeing as she was talking to him at all. The thought of her reading his song made his stomach twist, but at least she was talking to him. "No i—it's fine.”

"It's really good," she said, worrying the paper between her fingers. "I—I know the separation was hard on you, and I haven't made it any easier. I'm—"

"Please don't apologize," he said, reaching over to touch her hand. "None of this is your fault."

"But I—I never wanted you to feel this way. I never—Harry, how did we get here?"

Harry felt like his heart was breaking all over again. He in no way wanted Y/n to take responsibility for everything that went wrong between them. He never in his wildest dreams thought that they would've ended up like this. He loved Y/n with everything he had. He loved his family. All he wanted was to make things right, to be the father and husband they deserved and could be proud of.

"Come here."

For the first time in months, Y/n collapsed into Harry's arms. Breathing the biggest sigh of relief, he held her tight. He wasn't sure how many times they found themselves in this position, so often he'd taken it for granted. Y/n was crying, Harry was crying, but he'd never felt more at peace. He felt like he'd finally come home, even though he'd already been back for a couple weeks. Holding Y/n felt like coming home.

"I don't want to be away from you anymore, Harry. I hate it," she cried. "We're a team, H."

They'd always been a team. No matter what happened, it would be them against the world. Somewhere along the way, Harry seemed to lose sight of that.

"I know. I'm sorry. We can be a team again, I promise."

He didn't need Y/n to voice her wariness for him to know she didn't quite believe him. He knew he would have to win back her trust, but he was committed. Harry didn't care how long it took, his family was the only thing that mattered to him.

"No more music, no more touring. None of it means a fraction of what you and those four angels at home mean to me," he said, tilting her chin up so she could look at him. "I swear, Y/n, I won't step onstage again."

Y/n took Harry by surprise and kissed his cheek. "I just want there to be a balance, Harry. That's all I've ever wanted. I don't need you to give up your career, I just need reassurance that we're always going to come first."

"Done."

Harry knew it would take a lot more than just saying things to make Y/n believe them, but it was enough for now, enough to make it through these uncharted waters.

Y/n tipped her nose against Harry's, then again. His stomach swelled with anticipation as he nudged her back, exhaling some when she finally rested her lips on his.

It was barely a kiss, but to Harry, it was everything. He knew how much Y/n was going out on a limb by letting him in, by giving him a second chance, and he didn't take that lightly. She was the first girl he'd ever loved, and he'd be damned if she wasn't the last.

Y/n eventually fell asleep against his chest, her hands latched tightly onto his t-shirt as her deev breaths kept time with his. Harry stayed up, his hand running through her hair gently. Their legs were tangled together, and Y/n's cheek was squished against him in a way that made her lips puff out adorably. He could've spent the rest of the week just like this, not moving a single muscle, but he had a feeling they'd be going home early after all.

Nothing was near fixed. They had so much to figure out, Harry wasn't quite sure where to start. But he was holding the love of his life in his arms. Harry's life was starting to get back on track, and he felt a little kernel of hope blossom inside him as his eyes grew heavy. As he kissed the top of Y/n's head, he couldn't help but think that they might be alright.

[cataclysmiceuphemism]

45 of the kiss thing for showverse dolenzmith maybe?

Send me a Ship and a Number and I will Write a Kiss number 45…out of anger.

It started with Micky coming into the living room and dropping a duffel bag on the floor.

Mike looked at the bag. Looked at Micky. Asked, dry, "Was it something I said?"

It was a joke but it wasn't. Micky was flighty and Mike was scared to be left behind, and loose-cupped palms kept sand in your hands better than trying to grip it tight so he couldn't very well say 'Stay with me'. Micky laughed, though, one of his silly hiccupping kinds of laughs, and said, "Don't be silly. I'm gonna go and visit my family a while."

Mike let out a relieved breath.

"Today?" Davy asked.

"Sure, today. I'll only be gone a week or two."

"Kinda short notice, Mick," Mike said, reluctantly. They pooled their money, and all knew that they had more cents than they did dollars. They'd always make it work, for something any of them really wanted, though. He followed up before the disappointment could set in, "Whose turn is it to go to the pawn shop?"

"I'll go grab my bass," Peter said.

"Don't worry about it!" Micky stuck out a hand. He caught Peter's chest as he walked by, nearly knocking him off his feet to stop him. "My mom sent me the money. I just need a ride down to the bus station."

That was the second relieved breath: Mike let all the air out of his lungs in a whoosh.

He should've been asking more questions, he'd think later. Mike knew that Micky's mom was a flake— well-meaning, but a flake. She only lived on the other side of California and still had never sent Micky money before. She'd never visited before. The only time Micky had gone to see her was when he'd taken his drums down to the pawn shop, getting them out when he gotten back into town. But Mike was grateful, at the idea that Micky could see his family without the band going even broker than when they'd started. Grateful they wouldn't be cutting their slices of bread in half to stretch them out a while. Grateful they could keep all their instruments. "Sure," he said, "I'll take you right now."

And he did. They all did; just piled up and drove on down. Micky said his goodbyes and I love you's, leaned over the doors of the Monkeemobile to give them each a hug, and blew kisses while he walked off towards the bus depot.

Peter wailed in the passenger seat on the drive home. Bawled and blew his nose into a hanky so loudly that Mike found himself scrunching up his face and cleaning his ear out with his pinky. "Now, Peter," he scolded, "We oughta be happy. Micky's goin' to see his family, and he'll be back home in no time flat. Tell you what, we'll call his mom tomorrow, make sure he got settled in okay."

Peter nodded tearfully.

Mike was glad for the emotion, deep down. It maybe made some sort of sense to call and make sure that Micky made it home all right, but if it weren't for Peter's crying, the actual reason would have just been because Mike wanted to. He had wanted to call, because he wanted Micky's happy voice in his ear even if it was a little tinny. On his own, without Peter's crying, he maybe would have been able to convince himself not to— would have even, maybe, convinced himself it would be a bother, if they went calling Micky while he was out of town that way.

But Peter was crying and Mike wanted the excuse, so the following afternoon he called up Micky's mother. Peter's chin was on his shoulder. Davy had weaseled in under his armpit. They each had an ear cocked towards the phone.

"Hello, ma'am? This is Mike Nesmith. I'm Micky's roommate. Micky told us he was comin' down to see you. Me and the guys just thought we'd call, make sure he got down all right."

He hadn't.

She didn't know anything about him coming down, she said. And she hadn't sent him any money at all.

+++

Mike felt seasick. The floor was weaving, bobbing, underneath him. He couldn't breathe. He couldn't stand up. He sat down so quickly that Davy had to hop backwards to keep from being pulled down in a headlock. And his mind went blank. Not the blank of darkness, of night, but the blank of TV static. Buzzing and crackling in his ears and dizzying, hypnotizing in its own right if he kept looking at it too long.

Davy picked up the phone that Mike had let drop. "Oh, no, no. I'm sure he's all right. You know how he is. Just needed to clear his head a bit, he gets full of all kinds of funny ideas. Yes, of course, we'll have him call you when he gets home." He hung up the phone with a huff of air. He threw up his hands and asked Mike, "What're we going to do?"

"What do you mean, what're we going to do?" Mike asked. He sniffed, looked at his hands and blinked hard to keep the tears at bay. "If Micky wants to move out, well, we—we gotta let him move out."

"You're out of your head," Davy said.

"You heard her." Mike lifted his head, looking up at Davy. It was a rotten choice, and the tears came stronger. He rubbed his eyes with the heels of his hands, but the tears snuck out anyway. "She didn't send him any money, she didn't know he was comin'. He fed us a line 'cause he couldn't tell it to us straight."

"Mike." Davy folded his arms. He shook his head. Sighed. Unfolded his arms and rubbed Mike's shoulder. "He's a drummer. What's he going to do, sneak in here in the middle of the night to take his kit back?" He was right, Mike realized. Micky had had the opportunity to pawn his drums, either to take the money and run or buy them back once they'd left the bus station. He could've taken his most important earthly belonging, and hadn't. "Whatever's going on—"

"He's in big trouble," they said together.

"Right," Davy said, nodding.

That dried up Mike's tears in a hurry. "I'll head on down to the bus depot," he said.

"I'll make 'Missing' posters," Peter volunteered.

"I'll man the phone," said Davy.

They looked at each other, nodded their heads once, and took off.

+++

What came of it was this:

No one called.

No one at the bus depot recognized the picture of Micky that Mike pulled out of his wallet.

Eventually a man knocked on their door.

"I saw your poster," the man said. He held it out to Mike, who took it without looking. "You're looking for your friend?"

The Monkees all crowded the door. "Have you seen him?" Mike asked, eyebrows raised.

"Fuzzy brown hair?" the man asked.

All three nodded eagerly.

"Big brown eyes?"

They all nodded again, happily.

"Big smile?"

They nodded again. "Yeah, that's him!"

"—With pointy teeth?"

"Well—" Mike said, considering.

"Maybe a little," said Peter.

"The canines are pretty sharp," Davy agreed, eyebrows lifting. He gnashed his own teeth, once. "He'll get ya."

"A monkey?" the man asked. And with perfect timing, a chimp swung over the side of the man's car parked out front, and started swinging its way up the driveway.

Mike slammed the door and turned to fling his back against it. He looked down at the poster in his hand and said, "Two 'E's, Peter."

+++

After they'd locked the door on the man and the monkey, there'd been nothing but radio silence.

All told it had been three days.

Longer than three days, if Mike were feeling technical about it all, because Micky had left in the afternoon and they were getting ready to go to bed.

"Maybe in a few weeks, once he's settled," Mike was saying, "He'll give us a call asking us to bring his drums by." He was sat at the kitchen table, in his pajamas but not ready for bed in the slightest. He was looking wistfully at the picture of Micky that had gotten dog-eared from going in and out of his wallet so often the past few days.

"You really think he's moved out on us?" Davy asked.

Mike nodded. "Can't think of where else he'd be," he said.

He didn't say the part where he had to think Micky had moved away. He couldn't say why it was a need, when it tore his heart to pieces and sent the shreds up into the wind to blow away.

Davy stared at him a moment. "Don't stay up too late," he said eventually, and turned to walk upstairs.

Peter's gaze tracked Davy up the staircase, then went to settle on Mike. "We'll find him, Mike," he promised.

Mike smiled softly and gave Peter a slow nod.

Peter returned it before leaving Mike alone in the kitchen.

+++

It ended up fortuitous that Mike had fallen asleep at the kitchen table, arms folded under his head, Micky's picture still in his hand. The phone started to ring a quarter after two in the morning.

Mike answered on the first ring. He'd never woken up so fast. Hope had him asking, "Micky?" without expecting to be right.

"Mike?" Micky's happy, bubbly voice greeted him, "Boy I'm glad you picked up. Listen—"

"Where are you?"

"Can you come get me?"

"Yes. Where are you?"

"I only found a quarter, get a pen—"

"I got one, I got one." He didn't bother to try to find the paper. Just turned his palm up. Micky rattled an address that Mike knew he had to trust to get right, didn't have time to double-check it.

"It's about two hours from home, Mike, I'm sorry—"

Micky's voice cut off in the middle of his apology.

Two hours was nothing.

+++

He saw Micky just where he'd said he would be, sat on his duffel in front of the payphone. Mike would have known him in the dark. By silhouette. By sense alone. But there was a streetlamp making him bright, spotlighting him. Mike pulled up fast. He left the car running, left the door open, ran to Micky and shook him roughly just as Micky had gotten to his feet.

"Don't do that!" Mike pled in angry desperation. He shook Micky again. "Don't do that to me, Mick, I thought you were dead." He only realized in saying it that it was true. That his worst fear that Micky had walked out on him, had never really been his worst fear at all. It had been far easier to consider than the alternative, no matter how cruel it had made his thoughts seem to Davy. His relief made him furious, blinded him. He meant to hug Micky when he pulled him in, but a hug wasn't enough and he kissed him instead. At first it was a demand: Stay with me. Never go. I need you, so stay. And then Micky's surprise ebbed and he returned the kiss, deepened it, softened the way it had bruised his lips, and it became an apology.

"If you got to leave me," Mike said when they parted— only they didn't part at all. Because Micky hugged Mike to him tight. Mike crumpled into him and he cried hot, burning tears into Micky's throat. Because the second worst fear was still there, still bubbling ugly. But he couldn't finish. Let me help you pack, he thought. Give me the forwarding address. Let me move you in, wherever you need to be.

"Leave you?" Micky echoed, incredulous. And for a moment that's all it was, that incredulity as he let Mike cry against him. Then he pushed Mike away, held him at arm's length, because he couldn't believe it until he saw it in Mike's face. And maybe Mike wouldn't believe it until he saw the answer in his. "I wouldn't. Never, never. I love you, Mike. I love you. You know that, don't you?"

Mike said nothing. He did know that. He just never could wrap his mind around it. Thought it was a mistake, right then, for Micky to love someone that had gotten him lost and alone with no money in his pocket to get home.

"I really was just going to see my mom."

"She didn't pay your way."

"She wouldn't. I wouldn't want her to, but she wouldn't anyway," Micky said. "I just didn't want you guys to worry about it. Hocking instruments, man, come on. We're trying, but…." He didn't say we're failing. Maybe he didn't even think it. Mike didn't think it, either, not quite; he thought I'm failing in the singular— he couldn't even get Micky home to see his family without making him feel a burden. "We're not there yet. I thought, she's close enough, y'know. Not even out of the state. Me and Pete, our families aren't so far. I figured I could get a ride down there, no sweat." He stuck his thumb out to show what he meant. "Lots'a guys do it, why not me?"

"Lots'a guys aren't in The Monkees," Mike said. "Forget the instruments. If I got to build a new guitar out of matches and string, I'll do it."

Micky smiled at him crooked. "You'd catch it on fire your first riff."

"I'm telling you I don't mind." They looked at each other in the bright white light of the streetlamp, shadows of moths dancing across their faces. They spent a long time just looking at each other in the silence, until finally Micky looked away, ashamed.

"I'm sorry. I wouldn't've, if I thought—" Micky said. He ducked his head. He picked up his duffel bag. "Let's go home, Mike."

Mike found himself holding Micky's hand to the car. Holding it on the drive home. Holding it across the kitchen table when he made an early breakfast after he realized Micky hadn't packed any food and hadn't anything to eat save a couple of pieces of toast a sympathetic waitress had given him with the complimentary black coffee the morning before. He would have held it when they went to bed together. He made to, fingers laced together. But then Micky rolled into him, hugged him tighter, held him closer, face buried into Mike's neck and fingers digging into Mike's shoulders. It wasn't comfortable at all, not even a little, but it was the most restful sleep they'd had in days.

[wyntereyez]

Okay, just a few more segments of screaming into the void, I promise. In Part Four, I'm gonna talk about my Dad's side of the family.

As a child, I spent more time with my mother's side of the family. Partly because they lived close by, but partly, I discovered later, because they blatantly played favorites.

There were six children on that side of the family, three boys and three girls. Four of those children were wonderful. Perfect. Could do no wrong. The middle son and daughter, however, were tolerated. Yelled at. And I think they were actually physically abused, though my Dad won't talk about it, just mentions that my grandpa used to be 'really mean.' My aunt was less reluctant to talk.

My grandpa was ex-military, and came from Arkansas. My grandma was his perfect little housewife: didn't even want to learn to drive, cooked and cleaned everything, took care of the children. Hell, she literally never even left the house unless they were going somewhere. There'd be family gatherings that were mostly outdoors and she'd insist all her daughters come inside and be with her. I don't think I ever saw her willingly step foot outside.

The four golden children were allowed to do anything they wanted. They got everything - often at the expense of the non-favorites.

And this passed straight on to the grandchildren. Once I was old enough to actually be aware, I noticed that my grandparents would go out of their way to do things for my cousins, but ignore us when we were in need. The reason I barely saw them as a child, and was never even baby-sat by them? They just didn't want to.

When we'd invite them to things, like my birthday when I was still young enough to enjoy parties, they'd come over and completely ignore me. I know, small child, lots of grown-ups, not exciting for anyone, right? Except that they turned my birthday into a family gathering for them, and I felt like an inconvenience.

And things got so much worse when I got older. As soon as I got old enough to actually talk to, the ONLY conversations they'd ever really had about me was if I had a boyfriend yet. And when I was an adult, everything was about when I was going to have kids. EVERYTHING. I literally can't remember any conversation with any of them that wasn't about them first talking about themselves, and then when they finally realized I should be part of the conversation, too, it was always, "So, have you met someone yet? When are you giving your dad grandchildren?" My Least Favorite Aunt once told me, after I explained for the millionth time that I didn't want kids, that I needed to have them because my Dad would make such a good grandpa!

Thanks. So glad my opinion on something that would change my life meant nothing.

I dreaded anything that included this side of my family. One of the worst instances was my graduation party. Unfortunately, the daughter of Least Favorite Aunt was graduating the same year, though from a different school. When my Dad said they were going to hold a party for us both, all I felt was dread, because I KNEW it wouldn't be my party. It would be a family gathering that celebrated my cousin, and barely tolerated me or any guests I wanted, like, say, my Mom's side of the family.

I was right.

My aunt took complete control. I had no say in the day, or the time. She scheduled it so my cousin could attend friends' parties. It was at the same time as two parties I wanted to attend. My last chance to form any sort of connection with classmates, which was already nearly impossible.

Well, my aunt was in charge of the invitations. She ordered them in two different colors, to represent each of our schools. She kept putting off giving them to us.

We kept asking. And asking. And asking. School ended for seniors, and I lost my chance to give them invitations. Not that any of them could come anyway, because they were all going to the two big parties.

By the time we FINALLY got them, a week too late for me to do anything, there were only eight of my invitations left. My aunt had run out of my cousin's, so she gave mine to coworkers.

And to add insult to injury, SHE'D SPELLED MY NAME WRONG ON THEM.

So, my graduation party was basically me watching my cousin getting tons of gifts from my Dad's side of the family, her dad's side of the family, and my aunt's coworkers. While I got fewer gifts from my Dad's side, and a few pity gifts from the coworkers who felt guilty. Gee, thanks, your $10 gift makes me feel so much better after seeing you give my cousin $50+.

The whole thing seemed to be designed to rub in how much less valued I was.

Another standout was a shared birthday party. This one was so bad, it even got my Dad angry. Two of my cousins have the same birthday. The family decided to throw a party just for fun. At this point, I was an adult, I'd just gotten off work, and had only come along reluctantly because I was already pretty sure of how this was gonna go.

See, their shared birthday was October 8. My birthday was October 4. I knew that no one was going to remember my birthday. (I was a little wrong; an uncle of mine did. He was the only one.) I wasn't going to say anything, but my Dad was getting annoyed, and told me to mention my birthday, so I finally did. Okay, I did get some satisfaction out of seeing them flail around. One of them ran across the street to get me the world's most pathetic birthday gift, a $5 scratch-off ticket in which I won $0. The aunt who'd purchased it said she'd never seen one of that type of ticket have no reward; usually you made back at least the $5.

But, yeah. I avoid this side of my family because I'm either ignored or treated like breeding stock. I never felt like family to them.

[italianexotiicbeauty]

[ read more because THE FUCKING AUDACITY OF THIS BULLSHIT. ]

So, let's talk about AGGRAVATION. 🤬🤬🤬🤬

Mom decided to wait until this morning as my sister is getting ready for work to BRING UP that Mark told her on the phone that THEY'VE DECIDED TO GO IN A DIFFERENT DIRECTION..The reason they're asking for the title to the car is so they can trade it in, which is legitimate. Sadly with a broken transmission they won't get very much but fine, it also will take twenty days to get a replacement for it because mom has no idea where the original is.

Here comes the SHADIEST SHIT EVER.

“We've decided to go in a different direction and in order to get the car, you need to get your cellphone back.” You mean the one she willingly handed over when she got caught being scammed out of $300 because she was lonely and needed someone to talk to who was MOST DEFINITELY posing as an actor that would not EVER ask for money? Something we told her she couldn't tell ANYONE about because of how they'd respond? Why on earth does anyone THINK this is a “bargaining chip”, why? And Mark, John does NOT “pay all the bills” — he just signs/fills out the rent checks that YOUR FATHER WILLINGLY DECIDED TO PAY. We use the SSI she gets ONCE A MONTH to pay the bills. Do you actually know that? No, ya fuggin’ don't. There's a LOT of shizz they DON'T KNOW because past experience says TELLING THEM WOULD BE A BAD IDEA. ( and why bring up the fact that she has blocked lisa and then say “I don't want to get in the middle of it”? )

Kelly was absolutely right to not trust Mark. He asked for insurance info and mom's license photos, didn't say a damn word at all about what he told mom over the phone. Again, the trade in part is legitimate because it shaves off money from the buying price but the rest of it? Nope, I'm sorry — in what universe is that ever okay? Because now she has to go without seeing any of them, like ever — and I have to HOPE that this CTRides thing pulls through or she might need to consider trying to get part time work down the street at DG or Dunkin. ( because her staying home with barely enough to keep her mind occupied isn't good, the combination of adhd with depression & anxiety is bad news bears — if you know, you know. ) And yes, if I had work experience or a college degree or references — I'd apply  for work but if you don't know this? Mom gets stress brain fog ( or from her cluster headaches not going away immediately ) — so I have to stay home and look after her. 

Mom also talked about contacting her employer and asking them to find her cases in town, because this cannot go on. Not like this it cannot, and I am ALREADY actively concerned about what the outcome of November will be like. Because of what *that one* wants to eliminate what my family relies on — that so many rely on. 

I know this post is ALL over the place, but I am so ANGRY right now. Mom even just said that she's not even sure Mark would believe her that it'd take 20 days to get a replacement car title ( 20 days and $25 dollars, and even getting an appointment might not guarantee her walking out with it — don't actually know but it's a thought. ) like if that's what the legitimate DMV SITE even told Kelly, the fugg? 

… … … … … for reference, we did find mom a phone she could afford to have. A flip phone, yes they still make those and we'd pick a plan with no internet access / data use for her safety. But WHY does that need to be a "bargaining chip", and who the H E L L thinks this kind of tactics is okay?!

Due to my overall anger at this situation that was going a LITTLE TOO GOOD … phone's on DND mode. I … this post fully expresses everything I'm feeling and what we've learned, thank you for just listening.

Sincerely hope no one else has "family" who treats them ( my mother is the eldest sibling, and while she has health issues - that doesn't give anyone the right to treat her this way or even think it would be okay ) like this.

[kazooie]

I need to vent, I'm sure I've vented about this a lot here already but it's just the one thing that fucks me up still.

Tldr; venting about inability to own a house, unfair financial situations regarding family, and being the black sheep just for being mentally and chronically ill.

So, when we were selling my Nan's house, it was because she couldn't live at the nursing home if she still had assets or something, right? Except, she died the day after we sold it, and the buyer backed out. Now, my family has known for decades that I wanted to live there the rest of my life, it was going to be me and my family's home, but.. they sold it anyway? For what? The reason to sell it was no longer valid.

So we sold it, for not a lot but not too little either, howeverrr instead of the inheritance going to mum and her sisters, it also went to my two oldest cousins, which means when their mum dies they'll get her chunk of the inheritance too, even though out of everyone in our family me and my mum are the ONLY ones who don't own a house and live in a shitty community housing flat that's making us sicker, and that fucks me up!

Whenever I bring it up, looking for advice or sympathy, one of my aunts thinks I'm guilting her for owning a house, like, no, I'm not. But I'll tell you what I WILL guilt you for eventually, if I have to cut ties..

So, when I was a kid, said aunt got a loan of $250k from my grandparents, for a deposit for their house. A while later, my mum and dad got a loan of $10k, I forget what for, a business thing maybe? Idk. Anyway, so, my dad, he's an honest man,he will always pay back money he owes, and he did, every last can't. You can see where this is going I'm sure.

My aunt never paid her back. None of it. And my grandparents didn't even ask for it afaik, because she's the youngest sibling, and definitely the favourite. My aunt got $250k with no questions asked while my dad worked his ASS off to pay off his loan, and he still got treated like shit afterwards! I loved Pa, but he could be a real cunt sometimes.

My dad, my family in general, has always been treated as the black sheep(s), we're all disabled in some way, so we can't keep jobs and are on pensions. My grandpa especially was needlessly cruel to my parents and sometimes myself too, I never understood why, but I have a theory it's because mum had a psychotic episode in her 20s, and because her oldest sister is schizophrenic he might have seen that as a failure on his part? Idk the man was incredibly autistic but used his white male privilege to say whatever shit he wanted, he could say the meanest things and his defence would be "I'm just telling the truth."

If my cousins were left out of the will we'd have enough for a deposit, and they'd still get their quarter from their mum later.

I'm bitter, I'm depressed, my living situation is getting worse and worse because I just have no room for anything, and it all could have been avoided so easily, but everyone was so damn eager to get their inheritance right away that they left us behind, they didn't even let us go through nan and pa's things after they died, they took everything they wanted and threw out the rest without asking us.

Thing is, I still love my family, and it kills me because I don't think they love me, or respect me. I'll always be a little autistic kid who doesn't know how the world works in their eyes.

I don't know how to be okay.

[rayshippouuchiha]

Okay so, feel free to not answer this one, it's,, kinda heavy, i think? and a bit long. also, sorry about just dropping this here, it's just been weighting on me for at least a couple of years?

So, i'm 21, and like, a big lurker in fandom spaces, and with the ships I ship I sometimes see the "these kind of ships are only okay if you're a csa survivor" stuff, which,, bullshit, but always makes me go "is that,, me? does what happened to me count?" and like, i'm aware that just needing to ask that probably means the answer to that is yes, but I've always shied from thinking about myself that way? The term survivor feels heavy, i guess, like it needs to cross a threshold before the thing counts? Which, logically I know is not how that works, but still

It was just like, this one time I was staying at my great aunt's with my parents for like the 1000th time, I loved going over there, she and her husband had dogs and we'd have breakfast together and hang out doing stuff in the garden. But then this one time when I was like,, 13?? I was pretending to be asleep to read fanfic under the covers after bedtime (I was sleeping in a pullout couch in the living room) and my aunt's husband,, kinda groped me? I don't think he realized I was awake, but I froze and just did my best to pull away quietly and then he stopped and left, and I just,, never mentioned it to anyone in my family because I didn't want anyone to fight?? I've been very nervous about raised voices since I was little

After the fact we just left and anytime my parents mentioned visiting I'd try my best to get out of it, by coming up with like reports or homework I had to do over the weekend, and if I couldn't get out of going I'd just stay put in the room I usually slept in or go out with my parents just to have minimum contact with my uncle, which meant like, hugging him hello and goodbye when we got there and when we left, and sometimes accompanying him to gather wood for the fireplace

Anyways, for unrelated motives my parents and I moved to another entire continent right after I turned 16, and then a while later he got sick and died, and hearing everyone lamenting his death and saying that he was such a good man stung like a bitch, even though I*know* i specifically didn't mention it to anyone in my family to avoid any tension. Sometimes I wish I did say something? But like, we moved away *and* he's dead and nobody's even mentioned him in a long time so I don't really see the point? It's a weird thing, and I don't want my parents to ask why I didn't say anything earlier bc they'd get sad, i think

I do have a couple of people to talk to. My friends have gotten really angry on my behalf a few times now, and I love them. Still, it's a weird thing where I don't really want to think about it but also I know it's a thing that really affected me? Still, the term 'csa survivor' feels like it should go for,, heavier things, worse things

Sorry again for just,, dropping this here, just.. talking about it helps a bit, i think?

Oh darling this is a heavy one indeed.

Look, I'm going to be real with you.

What you feel about this uncle is valid. It doesn't matter that it was only once, it doesn't matter that it was "just a grope", it doesn't matter that it didn't progress, it doesn't matter that you were able to avoid him afterward.

He assaulted you. Point blank. He was an adult family member you should have been able to trust and he touched you in a way he should have never even thought to touch you.

I am so grateful that it never progressed, that you were able to stay away from him as much as possible and that he never touched you like that again but the fact remains that you should have never had to deal with that. The burden, the fear, of that kind of thing should have never been placed on you. He broke a trust with you and in you that could never be replaced and that is and will always be on him.

The title of survivor does feel heavy and I can understand why you wouldn't feel comfortable carrying it. In the end that's your choice and your choice is and should always be what matters most.

I also understand being reluctant to tell your parents, especially since he's dead now. I do have to ask if there were any other children or teenagers he might have also attempted to prey on besides you?

Either way I'm glad you have a support system, I'm glad you have friends you can talk to about it.

[bafflement]

Deaged Oz AU: Presents And Surprises

"I'm sorry, okay?" Tip sounded annoyed. "I might be the wizard, but I'm only eleven... I do not, in fact, know everything."

"We know that, Winter. However, surely you have some insight as to what they might do next?"

Tip sighed, pushing the report he'd carefully transcribed over to them. "If the pattern holds, they might follow what I wrote. But people can be unpredictable and this isn't really my job? They're your criminals and you appear to be more used to their antics than myself. I appreciate being asked for advice, but..." he shrugged, looking a bit helpless. "I don't really know the intricacies of how things work in Atlas. You do. Follow the report or don't, I've tried my best."

The council looked unhappy, but it was quickly obvious that they'd get nothing more out of Tip today. He had a point and they did have to admit it, however the fact that Winter was their version of the wizard meant that they were starting to push issues.

"You are Atlasian, though, Winter. You need to know how things work here, you're ours."

"No, I'm not. I do not remember being Winter Schnee, not really. I'm Tip, but... I do not belong to you. As the wizard, I don't think I actually can?" He sounded doubtful, even as Ozymandias cheered him on in the back of his head.

"Well, if we have more questions, we'll call you back. However, depending on the status of the report... you're free to go, Winter. Thank you for your help in the matter."

Stepping out of the room, Tip met up with Qrow and Winter, both of whom looked slightly worried at his obvious exhaustion.

"Ya okay, Pocketsized?" Qrow asked gently, reaching out and ruffling his hair. Tip leaned into the touch slightly even as he rolled his eyes.

"I'll be just fine, Qrow. I just... wish that they would stop asking for my help on matters that I have no real knowledge of. i appreciate that Atlas has a crime problem, but that isn't really in my jurisdiction anymore and even if it was... Atlas is not my kingdom."

Winter made a noise of disagreement and got a tired glare for her trouble. "It really, truly isn't. It may have been, once... but I'm from Vale, Winter."

"You're from Atlas, uncle. Vale stole you, but you're ours."

"I may be a Schnee, Winter, but that does not mean that I belong to Atlas."

Winter sputtered. "That's not what I meant! You're ours, part of our family. You're not theirs. Even if saying that sounds..."

"It is okay, Winter, truly. I'm only eleven, hopefully by the time I grow up again, things might be better?"

"Tip... why do you think you're eleven?"

"Because I... am? I was born in September, Winter, I'm eleven..."

"Did you just not read your own records? You... you were born in December, uncle. You're still ten."

Tip blinked at that, looking briefly annoyed before shrugging.

"So even my birthday is wrong? I don't celebrate it, but still..."

"We'll do something about it this year, okay?"'

Tip looked like he wanted to say something, but he also knew a losing battle when he heard one.

"Your birthday's next month?" Oscar butted in, having joined them a minute or so earlier.

"Apparently? Why, Oscar?"

"Because you're my brother, Tip... of course we're celebrating. You'll be eleven, right?"

"Physically, yes."

"Awesome. We'll do something good, don't worry!"

Tip hoped for several days that the others would just forget, only to be tapped on the head while curled up reading. He looked up to see Winter with a suspiciously shaped box in her hands.

"What's this, Winter?"

"A gift. We missed too many of your birthdays, uncle and you needed something to defend yourself with."

"I... have things, though? I have The Long Memory, i have my rapier..."

"Yes, but they're not distance weapons..."

"Distance? Winter, this isn't a gun, is it? You know i don't like guns."

"Just keep it with you, alright? I think we'd all feel safer."

"I will. thank you Winter." He smiled at her, albeit strained and she grinned back, leaving him to his book.

Tip, sighing, pulled the thing out of the box, blinking down at the heavy, tightly sheathed dagger. it was definitely mechashift and he unsheathed it carefully, pointed towards the floor and pulled the lever. A second later, he was holding a pistol, looking just as uncomfortable as he felt. Shifting it back quickly, he resheathed it, shoving it deep into his bag so as to be technically carrying it. He really, really didn't like guns.

[ratralsis]

8. The Anniversary

Table of Contents

Kevin stepped down from the stepladder. "Merry Christmas," he said, wrapping Marigold in a big hug.

"It's still two weeks away, even with a star on the tree," she said, her arms at her sides as she was squeezed. Seeing his disappointment, she rolled her eyes and added, "Still, sure, Merry Christmas. When it gets here."

Kevin released her and took half a step back. "Do you know what today actually is?"

"The eleventh?" she ventured.

He sighed and imitated her eye roll, having seen it too many times by now not to be able to do so perfectly. "It's the first anniversary of the night we met," he said. He turned and looked up at their fake tree, its cheap plastic star shiny with metallic yellow paint. There were garlands around the window next to the tree, and a stuffed snowman watched them from the end table next to their sofa. A scented candle provided them with the fresh scent of artificial pine, its flickering light reflected on the star and in the snowman's little black eyes. "A year ago I was buying you coffee. Now we're decorating our home together and everything."

"I can't believe you remember that," she said. She picked up her mug of hot cocoa and slid in next to him, and he put an arm around her without thinking about it. "Though I can't help but feel it's a waste to spend time and money decorating when it's just the two of us."

"About that," Kevin said, turning his head away from her. He cleared his throat, and took a deep breath of pine scent. "I was wondering if you'd mind if my family came to visit."

"If you really want them to," she said. "I guess that'd be okay. We'll have to find a night when I'm not busy."

"How about if we invite Henry and your sisters, too?" Kevin asked, because, sometimes, it was worth it to push his luck and ask for everything.

From the corner of his eye, he could see Marigold's eyes dart from the tree up towards him. He pretended not to notice. "I don't think this apartment is big enough for that many people," she said. "Not to mention we'd be asking them to take a long trip to come all the way out here."

"We could do two different nights, maybe," he suggested. "I don't think my parents will mind not meeting Henry. I mean, I'm sure they'd like to, but, you know."

She drummed the slender fingers of one hand on the mug she held, then took a long sip as she thought it over. "We can ask them, I guess," she said. "It might be fun to show the place off to everybody."

"Oh, and speaking of our families," Kevin said, turning to look at her. "Maybe I'm overstepping, but have you considered going to, like, a DNA or genealogy site or something to see if we could learn more about your heritage? Track down some other blood relatives of yours?"

She beamed at him and looked into his eyes. His heart still skipped a beat when she did that. "We don't need to," she said. "I already know what I am."

"Okay, sure," Kevin said. "But look, it's nice to say you're a musician or you're a Spade or whatever, but aren't you curious?"

At that, she laughed, and Kevin tried to hide his flinch of surprise. "No, I mean I've already spit in a few different tubes over the years and sent it off to some of those places." Seeing the confusion on Kevin's face, she continued. "They're all a little bit different, but I can nail down my lineages to a few percentage points." She drew herself to her full unimpressive height and smirked. "Care to take a guess?"

"I do not," Kevin said immediately. "Not even a little."

"Oh, boo," she pouted. "You're no fun at all."

"Are you going to tell me?"

"Not until you guess," she teased, but Kevin shook his head. It seemed he was unlikely to find out the answer anytime soon, and that was fine with him. She went on. "I found some suspected fourth or fifth cousins through one of the sites, but they were dead ends as far as tracking down closer relatives went. But yes, I am also a musician, and a Spade, and a lot of other things."

"Well, I'm glad I asked before ordering any kits, then," Kevin said, then, because she was still standing tall and presenting an easy target, he decided to lean down and kiss her on the cheek, more to see how she'd react than anything else.

Fast as lightning, as though she'd expected him to try this, she grabbed the drawstrings of his purple hoodie and pulled him down to her level. "And you know," she whispered seductively into his ear, "if you ever get around to giving me that ring I found so cleverly tucked away on the top shelf of the closet where you think I can't reach, I could add a couple more things to the list of things that I am."

Kevin froze, and only partly because he was worried that she might tear his third-favorite hoodie if he moved too quickly. "Oh," he stammered, and licked his lips. "That's actually, um, that's my grandmother's old wedding ring, you see. My mom inherited it, and she gave it to me when I turned eighteen. For someday, she told me. I've sort of held onto it since then, in case, that is, it wasn't meant to…" He trailed off.

Marigold let go of the drawstrings and leaned back, her eyebrows bunched together in a hurt look that pained Kevin to see. She bit her lower lip, her shoulders slumped. He tried to gauge her reaction, hoping she wasn't too upset. "You mean it wasn't for me?" she asked.

He could see the disappointment in her eyes. Kevin thought fast, and, after a moment that he feared was still a little too long, asked, "Did you want it to be for you?"

Her gaze flicked to one side. She squared her small shoulders, then looked straight at him, searching for her answer. A year into their relationship, Kevin still never fully knew what she was thinking, but he could tell the wheels were spinning in her head as she struggled to reach her conclusion and find the words to say it.

"Yes," she said. "Don't you?"

He looked into her big, brown eyes, and felt his heart thumping against the inside of his chest. What did that ring mean to him, anyway? What did she?

She reached out and gently took his hand in hers, and he felt the roughness of the calluses on her fingertips. It had been long enough that he knew he'd never get used to the feeling he got when she locked eyes with him.

But he thought it might be worth it to spend his life trying anyway. "I do," he said, and he did.

[oro-e-diamanti]

The one with the matchmaking

My masterlist

Description | Victoria is desperate to set you and Thomas up... Might there be a spark already?

Content | Fluff

Pairing | fem!Reader x Thomas

Word Count | 2663

Taglist (add yourself here!) | @mywritingonlyfans @damianodavide @lizstans @its-afucking-mess @ethaneskin @dont-let-me-drown-in-you @vampirtet @lividisuigomiti @tabi-toast @ethan-torchio-angelo @cheese-toastie-11 @thewitchinthemountain @ethanesimp @sofckinelectric @man3skin @daddydamiano @finelinejpm @superchrystaldrug @ginny-lily @nientedaridere @shaunthesheesh @damianodavidhands @teatrodellavita @coven-daddy @solasullabarca @foryourllove @makapaka11 @slave4yourlove @geklutst-ei @marriedwithmarktuan @bookish0918 @mehrmonga @ginny-lily @ohtorchio @messyhairday-me @bidet-and-legolas @maybanksslut @katyldamusic @fuckim-so-gay @demoiselle-en-detresse00

***

There had been an unspoken thing between you and Thomas from the first day you met. It was one of those right person, wrong time scenarios. Both of you were happily taken by other people, loving your partners, and leading healthy relationships. It simply hadn't been meant to be and both of you had gladly accepted it. Nothing had ever happened, despite the others insisting there must have, neither of you was like that. So you stayed friends with him, the same way you stayed friends with Victoria, Damiano, and Ethan and it didn't take long for the five of you to grow into a loving group, a chosen family. That was until both you and Thomas happened to have broken up with your respective partners within the same week. It was safe to say that it didn't take long for the meddling to start.

***

"I just think they'd make such a good couple!" Victoria said, pushing the empty beer bottles around on the table in annoyance. "They're basically made for each other."

"Leave it, Vic," Ethan said. The dark of the bar was hiding his features and the fact he was slightly rolling his eyes. "They both literally just got out of relationships, I don't think they're interested."

"But they both ended them so it's not like they've been broken up with," she insisted. "I'm sure they'll get over it quickly enough."

"Yeah I agree with Vic," Damiano added. "It's not like either of them seems all that heartbroken."

"Exactly, which is why we need to act now!"

"I still don't think it's a good idea," Ethan sighed. "Just let them figure it out on their own."

"But they're idiots! They'll never figure it out!"

Damiano couldn't help laugh out loud. He knew his friend was onto something, both Thomas and Y/n tended to be hilariously oblivious when it came to things like these.

"Maybe they just need a little push," he agreed.

"Fine." A deep sigh escaped Ethan. "But don't say I didn't warn you if it doesn't work out."

***

The moment you stepped into the vintage second-hand store you decided it was heaven on earth. It didn't take long for you to sweep through the place like a whirlwind, picking up pieces left and right, leaving Victoria and Thomas standing at the entrance still. You didn't care, this was one of your favourite places and you were not going to be held back because those two were slow. You tried on a dress that looked like an absolute mess on you and you quickly took a picture to laugh at later with the others, before trying on some trousers that you really took a liking to. You were still in them, trying to figure out if you had also grabbed a top that would match when someone knocked on the wood of the changing room. Confused and not certain if the noise was directed at you, you pulled back the curtain to come face to face with Thomas. He noticed you were in your bra before you did.

You raised your eyebrows, overly amused at how he was nervously looking around to figure out if anyone else would be able to see her, but no one seemed to be around. As he turned back, he tried not to let his gaze fall into her chest again, but failed miserably. You laughed heartily, "It's fine, stop blushing, Thomas."

He grinned, more relaxed not that he knew you didn't mind. He shouldn't, this being far from the first time he'd seen you like this.

"Vic told me to give you this dress to try on."

You looked at the piece of fabric he handed you, a gorgeous, velvety black, knee-high dress with a dangerous slit and a plunging neckline. It wasn't something you would have chosen yourself, but you trusted Vic's judgment. The curtain was quickly closed again, removing the trousers you had already decided on and slipped on the dress. It fell in a much nicer way than you had anticipated, easily smoothing itself over your curves and settling perfectly in place. The mirror agreed with your sentiment - you looked gorgeous. Okay, so this dress would do with a bit more makeup and without a bra, but it was a no-brainer that you were going to buy it.

You ripped open the curtain, now facing both of your friends. As soon as Vic saw you, she seemed as smitten with it as you were. Thomas looked stunned in his own way but stayed quiet.

"Fuck, I knew that was your dress!" Victoria shouted, obviously proud of herself for picking it out.

"Where am I ever going to wear this?" You asked, spinning to muster your reflection once again.

"When I take you out tomorrow night," Vic grinned. "There's a gorgeous new restaurant in town but it's fancy fancy, so this will do just fine."

You couldn't help but squint your eyes at her through the mirror. Her suggestion sounded just fine, but the way her eyes flickered made you feel like there was something more to the story.

***

"Wait, so how will you going out with her to dinner help, exactly?"

"Oh, Damiano, stop being so dumb. Obviously, I won't go."

"I don't get it."

"I'll have some sort of last-minute emergency, and since both of you will be out of the house, Thomas will have to step in."

Ethan sighed, shaking his head at his friend's plan.

"Why do you have to meddle so much, Vic?"

"Because those two don't get it. But once they see each other all dressed up, romantic dinner, candles, good wine, it'll click."

"Whatever you say."

***

"Oh my god, Y/n, I'm so sorry!" Victoria burst into your room, Chili cradled in her arms and an apologetic look on her face. "I know we said we'd go to that fancy restaurant tonight, but Chili's been coughing and the vet told me to come in immediately."

You side-eyed the little white dog, looking as happy as can be, but there was no reason for you not to trust Victoria. Right? You briefly petted Chili's head.

"Don't worry about it, we can always go some other time."

"No!" Her outburst surprised you. "I mean, it's so difficult to get a reservation there and you should wear your dress out. Damiano and Ethan are out, but I'm pretty sure Thomas is free, please ask him, he'd probably love to go with you!"

You wanted to scold Victoria, tell her this wasn't happening, tell her you'd be fine just staying home, but she didn't give you a chance to do any of it. Instead, she left your room, immediately shouting for her bandmate. It was the reason you found yourself at a candlelit dinner with the blond man mere hours later.

"You look amazing, by the way," Thomas said. Well, he actually kind of mumbled it into his pasta rather than proudly state it. You felt like blushing.

"So do you, love. But you know I love you in a suit."

Your eyes met, just for a moment, before both of you found yourselves awkwardly staring back at your plates again. You didn't know why you were behaving like this, or why he was, you could only attribute it to the fact that this felt like an overly romantic date and the waiter had referred to you as his girlfriend multiple times already. Neither of you had corrected him. You hadn't minded the single rose that had been placed between you on the table, accompanied by a little wink and a smile by the waiter.

"You know, you make a lousy boyfriend, not even bringing me flowers for our date, " you teased, watching as a shy smile appeared on Thomas' face, his eyes travelling down the table for a second before looking at you again with more than a twinkle.

"I did take you to the nicest restaurant in town, surely that gets me some points?"

The giggle bubbled over your lips easily. Everything came easy with Thomas. He made the troubles disappear with one look, one touch of a hand, a single word, a gesture, his existence. He was your own personal cure to everything.

***

"No, I'm telling you, it worked," Victoria excitedly gasped and she gathered in the kitchen with Damiano and Ethan, trying to stay as inconspicuous as possible. "You should have seen them when they came back!"

"Did you actually wait up for them?" Ethan asked, slightly disbelieving, slightly amused.

"Well, they didn't know obviously! I just cracked my bedroom door open a bit. But they were all giggly and happy and they hugged when they said goodnight!"

"Vic, we all hug all the time," Damiano threw in.

"Not the way they did. I'm serious, this is working and you'll see soon enough!"

"So what's the next idea then?"

"I'm... I'm not quite sure," she admitted. "But I'll figure it out and it'll be perfect."

***

The thunderstorm hadn't been predicted by any of the weather channels. You found yourself standing in front of the patio doors with Thomas, watching the heavy rain disturb the surface or the pool, trees swaying in the wind, a flash of light illuminating the garden in regular intervals. It had only been the two of you home when it had started, everyone else out to meet friends or sitting in a bar with a drink in their hand. You had been having a lazy day, unwilling to leave the house at all, while Thomas had slept for so long no one had bothered trying to wake him so he could join in on plans.

"Do you want to compare our favourite records?"

You had been so focused on the happenings outside of the glass that you almost flinched in surprise at his question. Still, a slight smile, the right kind of look, and you were nodding enthusiastically. Hasting up the stairs, barefoot and in nothing but shorts and the shirt you usually slept in, you went through the little collection you had brought to the summer house, already hearing the first notes of Led Zeppelin's Black Dog echoing downstairs. With a smile on your face, you grabbed a few records and bolted back down to Thomas.

"I still prefer Led Zeppelin III," you giggled, only to be greeted with Thomas' shocked face. "Anything that has Immigrant Song on it is a hit, really."

"Blasphemy! Nothing tops IV, and you clearly have no taste."

"You clearly have no taste considering you think anything Led Zeppelin has put out is better than Fleetwood Mac's Rumours." You barely waited for the first song of Thomas' album of choice to finish playing before interrupting it with the sound of Second Hand News.

It didn't take long for the conversation to get heated. Still, you kept playing your record in the background, effortlessly dodging his effort to change it, even though the whole thing had been his idea in the first place. He was still complaining, explaining, talking to a wall basically, as you danced around the living room, as the music flowed through you, singing along, thunder only happens when it's raining, as the weather outside did its worst.

"I just think it's much too sad, most of it," Thomas finally concluded.

"Doesn't that just make it so beautiful though?"

"No, it just makes me sad," he pouted.

"Maybe you just never listened to it the way you should. In the arms of someone you love."

A heartbeat passed as both of you looked at each other, but then your smile returned and you motioned for him to get on the sofa with you, lying on your side as he slowly but surely moved in front of you. Your arms wrapped around him, spooning him, making you feel safer than you ever have as Songbird played in quiet tones.

Your nose buried itself in his hair, letting his smell fill your every pore, taking over your whole being as you pressed into him, singing along in nothing but a whisper.

"And I love you, I love you, I love you, like never before."

***

"Guys, guys, guys, look at that!" Victoria called out to her friends as they quietly made their way into the house. "I knew it would be such a good idea to leave them alone in the house!"

"Vic, it's not like you made a thunderstorm come along, I'm pretty sure this was not your doing for once," Damiano whispered.

"Doesn't matter! Look at them spooning! We're on the right way, guys!"

"We're not on any way," Ethan threw in. "You keep trying to meddle and the two of them are going their own ways."

"They just need another push. I just gotta think of something."

***

"Hey, they let you feed the goats here!" Victoria squealed as everyone around her let out a groan. The zoo was bustling with people, the five friends surrounded by families, and Vic easily fell in line with the children's excitement.

"Vic, I really really don't like goats," you complained. "I'd rather not get their attention because I got food in my hands."

"Fine. How about you go see the owls over there with... Thomas, and I go feed some adorable goats with Ethan and Damiano?"

The both of you allowed yourselves to be pushed away easily, chuckles on your faces as you walked away from the rest of the group, dodging running toddlers as you went.

"So, this is a set-up, huh?" Thomas grinned next to you as his arm slid around your waist, pulling you closer.

"Oh, as if Victoria has been doing anything these past weeks without hidden intentions." You let yourself mold into Thomas' side, leaning in closer until your bodies were touching as much as physically possible. "She's not half as subtle about this as she thinks. I'm sure she's watching right now."

You didn't turn around, but you felt her eyes on the pair of you, watching your every move and trying to figure out what was going on between the two of you.

"Do you wanna give her a show?" You playfully pinched his site, looking at him from the corner of your eyes just to see a smile appear on his face that was surely mirroring yours. "Make out a little bit?"

"Wouldn't that give it away?" He stopped walking, now wrapping both of his arms around you as you leaned on his chest, looking up at him.

"I'm sure she'd still think it's just a first step in the right direction."

Not waiting for his response, your hand reached up to his face, slowly stroking along the soft skin of his cheek, thumb running over his lower lip as his smile grew, then reaching around, tangling them into his hair and pulling him down to you. His lips met yours in a sigh, warm and lovely, a tingling feeling spreading through you immediately, pressing yourself into him. You could feel his thumb stroking your back ever so slightly as he held you. He wanted more, slowly moving his lips, trying to deepen the kiss, but you pulled away. Close enough to still feel his breath on you, close enough that whispering would be enough.

"Now, we don't want Vic to figure it all out immediately," you grinned before putting more distance between the two of you. He groaned, making you giggle, before taking your hand and pulling you along.

"How much longer are you planning to keep this up?" Thomas asked, shaking his head, but still amused. "We've been together for two weeks."

"Pretty sure she already bought tickets for the cinema for me and her for Wednesday... which she'll inexplicably have no time for so you'll have to come along, obviously. I can give you a hickey in the dark theater, she'll freak."

Thomas laughed out loud, pressing a single kiss to the top of your head.

"Fine. One more date, that's it?"

"One more date."

[kookie-doughs]

Y/N L/N AND THE HALFBLOODS

Percy Jackson X Reader

-Y/N L/N met Percy Jackson and everything is now ruined.

Chapter 22: Then It Ended

As soon as we came, Annabeth ang Grover tackled me. We were the first heroes to return alive to Half-Blood Hill since Luke, so of course everybody treated us as if we'd won some reality-TV contest. According to camp tradition, we wore laurel wreaths to a big feast prepared in our honor, then led a procession down to the bonfire, where we got to burn the burial shrouds our cabins had made for us in our absence.

Annabeth's shroud was so beautiful—gray silk with embroidered owls�� Percy told her it seemed a shame not to bury her in it. She punched him and told him to shut up. Percy being the son of Poseidon, he didn't have any cabin mates, so the Ares cabin had volunteered to make his shroud. They'd taken an old bedsheet and painted smiley faces with X'ed-out eyes around the border, and the word LOSER painted really big in the middle.

As I was still unclaimed, Hermes cabin had made me one. (Just... IDK go crazy with your shroud IG) It was fun to burn. As Apollo's cabin led the sing-along and passed out s'mores, Percy and I was surrounded by my Hermes cabinmates, Annabeth's friends from Athena, and Grover's satyr buddies, who were admiring the brand-new searcher's license he'd received from the Council of Cloven Elders. The council had called Grover's performance on the quest "Brave to the point of indigestion. Horns-and-whiskers above anything we have seen in the past." The only ones not in a party mood were Clarisse and her cabinmates, whose poisonous looks told me they'd never forgive us for disgracing their dad. That was okay with me. Even Dionysus's welcome-home speech wasn't enough to dampen my spirits. "Yes, yes, so the little brats didn't get themselves killed and now they'll have an even bigger head. Well, huzzah for that. In other announcements, there will be no canoe races this Saturday...." Going back to the cabin I finally had time to talk to Luke. Who just expressed his relief of me being fine, and how he was scared when Annabeth told everyone about me. No wonder everyone was so shocked seeing me come back with Percy. On the Fourth of July, the whole camp gathered at the beach for a fireworks display by cabin nine. Being Hephaestus's kids, they weren't going to settle for a few lame red-white-and-blue explosions. They'd anchored a barge offshore and loaded it with rockets the size of Patriot missiles. According to Annabeth, who'd seen the show before, the blasts would be sequenced so tightly they'd look like frames of animation across the sky. The finale was supposed to be a couple of hundred-foot-tall Spartan warriors who would crackle to life above the ocean, fight a battle, then explode into a million colors. As Annabeth, Percy and I were spreading a picnic blanket, Grover showed up to tell us good-bye. He was dressed in his usual jeans and T-shirt and sneakers, but in the last few weeks he'd started to look older, almost high-school age. His goatee had gotten thicker. He'd put on weight. His horns had grown at least an inch, so he now had to wear his rasta cap all the time to pass as human. "I'm off," he said. "I just came to say ... well, you know." I tried to feel happy for him. After all, it wasn't every day a satyr got permission to go look for the great god Pan. But it was hard saying good-bye. I'd only known Grover a year, yet he was my oldest friend. Annabeth and I gave him a hug. She told him to keep his fake feet on. I asked him where he was going to search first. "Kind of a secret," he said, looking embarrassed. "I wish you could come with me, guys, but humans and Pan ..." "We understand," Annabeth said. "You got enough tin cans for the trip?" "Yeah." "And you remembered your reed pipes?" "Jeez, Annabeth," he grumbled. "You're like an old mama goat." But he didn't really sound annoyed. He gripped his walking stick and slung a backpack over his shoulder. He looked like any hitchhiker you might see on an American highway. "Well," he said, "wish me luck." He gave Annabeth and I another hug. He clapped Percy on the shoulder, then headed back through the dunes. Fireworks exploded to life overhead: Hercules killing the Nemean lion, Artemis chasing the boar, George Washington (who, by the way, was a son of Athena) crossing the Delaware. "Hey, Grover," Percy called. He turned at the edge of the woods. "Wherever you're going—I hope they make good enchiladas." Grover grinned, and then he was gone, the trees closing around him. "We'll see him again," Annabeth said. July passed. I spent my daysplanning out strategies with Luke for capture-the-flag and making alliances with the other cabins to keep the banner out of Ares's hands. I got to the top of the climbing wall for the first time without getting scorched by lava. From time to time, Percy and I would walk past the Big House, he'd glance up at the attic windows, and think about the Oracle.

I tried to convince him that its prophecy had come to completion. "You shall go west, and face the god who has turned." "Been there, done that—even though the traitor god had turned out to be Ares rather than Hades." "You shall find what was stolen, and see it safe returned." "Check. One master bolt delivered. One helm of darkness back on Hades." "You shall be betrayed by one who calls you a friend." Percy recited. "Ares had pretended to be our friend, then betrayed us. That must be what the Oracle meant.... Or maybe Nereid?"

"And you shall fail to save what matters most, in the end." He sighed. "I had failed to save my mom and lost you..."

"So why are you still uneasy?" The last night of the summer session came all too quickly. The campers had one last meal together. We burned part of our dinner for the gods. At the bonfire, the senior counselors awarded the end-of-summer beads. Percy and I got our own leather necklace, and when I saw the bead for my first summer. The design was pitch black, with a sea-green trident shimmering in the center.

"This is so beautiful..." I smiled to Percy. "The choice was unanimous," Luke announced. "This bead commemorates the first Son of the Sea God at this camp, and the quest he undertook into the darkest part of the Underworld to stop a war!" The entire camp got to their feet and cheered. Even Ares's cabin felt obliged to stand. Athena's cabin steered Annabeth to the front so she could share in the applause. I'm not sure I'd ever felt as happy or sad as I did at that moment. I'd finally found a family, people who cared about me and thought I'd done something right. And in the morning, most of them would be leaving for the year. * * * The next morning, Luke called me. He gave me a paper, telling me to fill it out, and asked me to meet him as soon as I could. I knew Dionysus must've filled it out, because he stubbornly insisted on getting my name wrong: Dear (WRONG NAME) , If you intend to stay at Camp Half-Blood year-round, you must inform the Big House by noon today. If you do not announce your intentions, we will assume you have vacated your cabin or died a horrible death. Cleaning harpies will begin work at sundown. They will be authorized to eat any unregistered campers. All personal articles left behind will be incinerated in the lava pit. Have a nice day! Mr. D (Dionysus) Camp Director, Olympian Council #12 That's another thing about ADHD. Deadlines just aren't real to me until I'm staring one in the face. Summer was over, and I still don't know what to do. I had no where to go to. The only option I had was Percy's or maybe Hades was not joking about inviting me back to the Underworld. Sighing I decided to just meet Luke before filling it for second opinions. The campgrounds were mostly deserted, shimmering in the August heat. All the campers were in their cabins packing up, or running around with brooms and mops, getting ready for final inspection. Argus was helping some of the Aphrodite kids haul their Gucci suitcases and makeup kits over the hill, where the camp's shuttle bus would be waiting to take them to the airport. I was walking around looking for Luke. I jumped when I felt someone tap me from behind. I instinctively unsheathed my knife and turned only to see Luke with his hands raised.

"Whoa! Calm down just me." He laughed.

"Kinda weird seeing someone laugh at a knife pointed at them." I smirked sheathing my knife.

"I only laugh since its you." He smiled and ruffled my hair. "Are you done with everything?"

"Not really. I don't know whether to leave or not yet. That's why I came. Help me?" I asked him.

He turned to me and to the forest. "How about you hear me out about something... important and private... then decide?" He gestured towards the forest.

"Not planning on killing me are you?" I squinted at him.

He gasped. "Not you. Never. I would never hurt you."

I let him lead me to a shrouded area of the forest.

"How serious is this thing that you can't let anyone see? I am blindly trusting you here Luke." I laughed nervously. But when he didn't reply I felt something was off. "Luke, okay this isn't cool. How deep into the forest do we have to go?"

"Y/N remember when you said... You want to be the person I trust...? How you promised to help me?"

"Luke?" He took my hand and pulled me sharply. I winced at how hard he pulled me. "That hurts! Let me go!"

He snapped back and let go of my wrist. "I-I'm sorry... Y/N..."

As much as I knew I had to leave, I couldn't I was worried about him. I reluctantly placed a hand on his shoulder. "What's happening?"

"I did it..." I said and sat on the ground. "I swear I didn't mean to get you hurt. But, I confess to everything. I  stole bolt and helm, I summoned the hound, I gave Percy the cursed shoes... And just now, I tried to kill Percy Jackson." He looked at me with empty eyes.

I shot up and looked at him in emotions I couldn't put in words. "W-Wh---" I wanted to leave and check on Percy. But once again, seeing him right now... I need to stay with him. "Why are you telling me this...?"

"Join me... please?" his voice was weak. He sounded vulnerable. "Let's serve my Lord together..."

"L-Luke... no. I-I can't do that!" I took his shoulder, "Y-You should stay with me instead. How about that, huh? L-Let's explain to Chiron and the others... come on please. I could help you!"

Nothing was working.

"Come with me..." He muttered.

"Luke, I won't join you. You have to change your mind. You can't do this."

"I can't change my mind."

"I can help you with that? How about you go with me huh? I could spend all my time doing this and that. Please, just change your mind."

He didn't reply for a while until he whispered, "Promise me."

"Promise you what?"

"You'll stay with me."

"What? Luke I wo--"

"You won't join... Just...don't stay here for the year... and stay with me."

"I-If I stay with you... what would that mean?"

"Yo-You... might change my mind."

"I'll go." I replied with no hesitation. "I'll leave camp for the year. And I'll find my parent to prove to you that Gods and Goddess aren't all bad. We'll find my parent together."

"I do my lord's bidding--"

"You can still do it. If you want to. But whatever happens... stays only between us. I'll stay with you until I change your mind. And I'll bring you back to camp."

"I would never do anything to ruin your trust in me." He knelt down. It was kinda awkward but hey... "I need you."

Worry not hero. We shall stay.

"Please..."

We'll meet again. Wait for us, we shall join you soon. Now leave.

I had no idea what happened since when I came to Luke was gone and there was no sign of him anywhere. How were we going to st---

We will meet him once we leave. Now go as our hero needs us.

I suddenly remembered Percy's state that Luke had told me about. So I ran. I ran to the Big House

***

Percy finally opened his eyes. He was propped up in bed in the sickroom of the Big House, his right hand bandaged like a club. Argus stood guard in the corner. Annabeth and I sat next to Percy, I was holding his nectar glass and she was dabbing a washcloth on his forehead.

"Here we are again," Percy said. "You idiot," Annabeth said, "You were green and turning gray when we found you. If it weren't for Chiron's healing..." "Now, now," Chiron's voice said. "Percy's constitution deserves some of the credit." He was sitting near the foot of the bed in human form. His lower half was magically compacted into the wheelchair, his upper half dressed in a coat and tie. He smiled, but his face looked weary and pale, the way it did when he'd been up all night grading Latin papers. "How are you feeling?" he asked. "Like my insides have been frozen, then microwaved." "Apt, considering that was pit scorpion venom. Now you must tell me, if you can, exactly what happened." Between sips of nectar, he told them the story.

I bit my lip trying to keep what happened between Luke and I private. It was a risky move that would not be approved by anyone after all. The room was quiet for a long time. "I can't believe that Luke..." Annabeth's voice faltered. Her expression turned angry and sad. "Yes. Yes, I can believe it. May the gods curse him.... He was never the same after his quest."

Percy was looking at me as if checking what was my reaction to his story. "This must be reported to Olympus," Chiron murmured. "I will go at once." "Luke is out there right now," Percy said. "I have to go after him." Chiron shook his head. "No, Percy. The gods—" "Won't even talk about Kronos," Percy snapped. "Zeus declared the matter closed!" "Percy, I know this is hard. But you must not rush out for vengeance. You aren't ready." "Chiron... your prophecy from the Oracle... it was about Kronos, wasn't it? Was I in it? Y/N? And Annabeth?" Chiron glanced nervously at the ceiling. "Percy, it isn't my place—" "You've been ordered not to talk to me about it, haven't you?" His eyes were sympathetic, but sad. "You will be a great hero, child. I will do my best to prepare you. But if I'm right about the path ahead of you..." Thunder boomed overhead, rattling the windows. "All right!" Chiron shouted. "Fine!" He sighed in frustration. "The gods have their reasons, Percy. Knowing too much of your future is never a good thing." "We can't just sit back and do nothing," He said. "We will not sit back," Chiron promised. "But you must be careful. Kronos wants you to come unraveled. He wants your life disrupted, your thoughts clouded with fear and anger. Do not give him what he wants. Train patiently. Your time will come." "Assuming I live that long." Chiron put his hand on Percy's ankle. "You'll have to trust me, Percy. You will live. But first you must decide your path for the coming year. I cannot tell you the right choice...." I got the feeling that he had a very definite opinion, and it was taking all his willpower not to advise me. "But you must decide whether to stay at Camp Half-Blood year-round, or return to the mortal world for seventh grade and be a summer camper. Think on that. When I get back from Olympus, you must tell me your decision." "I'll be back as soon as I can," Chiron promised. "Argus will watch over you." He glanced at Annabeth. "Oh, and, my dear... whenever you're ready, they're here." "Who's here?" Percy asked. Nobody answered. Chiron rolled himself out of the room. I heard the wheels of his chair clunk carefully down the front steps, two at a time. Annabeth studied the floor. "What's wrong?" Percy asked her. "Nothing. I ... just took your advice about something. You ... um ... need anything?" "Yeah. Help me up. I want to go outside." "Percy, that isn't a good idea." Percy slid his legs out of bed. Annabeth and I caught him before he could crumple to the floor.

I said, "I told you ..." "I'm fine," He insisted.

He managed a step forward. Then another, still leaning heavily on me. Argus followed us outside, but he kept his distance. By the time we reached the porch, his face was beaded with sweat. But we had managed to make it all the way to the railing. It was dusk. The camp looked completely deserted. The cabins were dark and the volleyball pit silent. No canoes cut the surface of the lake. Beyond the woods and the strawberry fields, the Long Island Sound glittered in the last light of the sun. "What are you going to do?" Annabeth asked us. "I don't know." Percy replied. "I got the feeling Chiron wanted me to stay year-round, to put in more individual training time, but I'm not sure that's what I want. I also don't want to leave you both with Clarisse only." Annabeth pursed her lips, then said quietly, "I'm going home for the year, Percy." He stared at her. "You mean, to your dad's?" She pointed toward the crest of Half-Blood Hill. Next to Thalia's pine tree, at the very edge of the camp's magical boundaries, a family stood silhouetted—two little children, a woman, and a tall man with blond hair. They seemed to be waiting. The man was holding a backpack that looked like the one Annabeth had gotten from Waterland in Denver. "I wrote him a letter when we got back," Annabeth said. "Just like you suggested. I told him... I was sorry. I'd come home for the school year if he still wanted me. He wrote back immediately. We decided... we'd give it another try." "That took guts." She pursed her lips. "You won't try anything stupid during the school year, will you? At least ... not without sending me an Iris-message? Both of you?" Percy managed a smile. "I won't go looking for trouble. I usually don't have to."

"You already know my plans."

"When I get back next summer," she said, "we'll hunt down Luke. We'll ask for a quest, but if we don't get approval, we'll sneak off and do it anyway. Agreed?" "Sounds like a plan worthy of Athena."

She held out her hand. Percy shook it. She gave me a hug. "Take care, Seaweed Brain," Annabeth told Percy. "Keep your eyes open."

"You too, Wise Girl."

Then turned to me, "Good luck on your own quest Droopy."

"Of course Peabody." We watched her walk up the hill and join her family. She gave her father an awkward hug and looked back at the valley one last time. She touched Thalia's pine tree, then allowed herself to be lead over the crest and into the mortal world. "I made my decision." Percy said. "What's yours?"

"I'll be leaving camp... I'm going to look for my parent..." He looked at me in shock. "I'll be back next summer," I promised him. "I'll survive until then."

"Alone?"

I smiled at him.

"Don't you want to stay with us? Mom said---"

"I want to find my parent. I need to. I'll be fine Percy."

I helped Percy to his cabin so he could pack and went to mine. To my surprise I see a middle-aged man with an athletic figure slim and fit with salt-and-pepper hair, and a very familiar sly grin. He had bags at his foot.

"Delivery for Y/N L/N."

"Uhm..."

"Hermes." He said.

I froze and looked at him with wide eyes.

"Personally packed. As a thank you for what you're about to do." He smiled softly and handed me the bags.

"H-Huh...?"

"For helping Luke."

"I..."

Don't forget her mail!

Ooh! And tell her to bring us snacks next time we meet since it'll be often now!

No it wouldn't be often! She'll be with Luke!

"Both of you keep quiet." Pulling out a mail he handed it to me. "Luke... prayed to me telling me about your plan. He asked me to help you. I don't know what or why he did it. But I know he'll change thanks to you. So do guide him."

"Sorry you lost me at the talking air..." I blinked.

Hermes laughed and showed a caduceus. "It's just George and Martha."

"Hi?"

Hello!

Hi

"I just wanted to let you know. No god or goddess could see you. No matter how hard they tried. So your secrets.. are really secrets. Good luck on your travel."

Next time we meet you should have snacks.

Then he vanished.

Staring at the letter on my hand, I was stunned seeing it was from... my mom and dad.

Sweetie,

You've made quite a friend here.

-Mom and Dad.

I immediately knew where to look. I hurriedly took my bags not bothering to check the contents. I ran to Percy's cabin and helped him out so we could leave.

Percy got a cab and looked at me worriedly.

"I'll write you. Stay safe Arthur Curry." I ruffled his hair and watched him go.

I didn't know where to go so I just went to the first secluded area I saw.

"You have more stuffs than when you arrived." I heard someone behind me.

"You prayed to your dad. I hope he knows how to pack." I sighed turning to him. Turning around I barely made out Luke from the few days I last saw him. "You okay?"

"Do you know where to look first?"

Call upon our hound.

I whistled, I don't know why. But when I did, D/N came out of the blue. Luke looked at me and my dear dog, who was probably bigger than the hound he'd summon back then. "How do feel about L.A?" I said riding on D/N and making space behind me for Luke.

~~~END OF BOOK 1~~~

Previous | Book 1 Masterlist | Series Masterlist

END OF BOOK ONE!!! THANK YOU FOR READING YLATHB I HOPE YOU ENJOY!! I'LL PUBLISH BOOK 2 WHEN I'M DONE OR EVEN AT LEAST HAVE WRITTEN 5 CHAPTERS OF THE BOOK 2 ;))

I HOPE TO SEE YOU NEXT TIME!!!

Taglist?

@gayer-than-the-gayest-gay @the-natureofme @booknerd-3000 @katara720 @ynfics

[brendaonao3]

For the top gun ask meme, 17 and 19!

MONKIE MY DARLING IT'S SO GOOD TO SEE YOU AGAIN! :D

It's crazy how so many of us keep finding each other in different fandoms - bless hot men and women and their issues, they really do keep fandom going.

Okay, for the Top Gun Ask Meme

17. Was there anything in the movies you wish was handled differently?

Oh yeah, of course, there are totally a few tweaks I'd make to both films.

In OG Top Gun, the ending scene with Charlie has always felt really tacked on in that mid-80s kind of way where the filmmakers knew they wanted to get ladies into the theatre, and figured the best way to do it was to amp up the "romance", when it really wasn't needed. Charlie's a great character, but she'd served her purpose in the film, and having her head out to D.C. felt more realistic. Instead, I wished they'd ended the film with Mav, idk, having dinner with Carole and Bradley or something, to establish that he's still carrying on with his promise to Goose to look after Goose's family.

In Top Gun: Maverick, tbh, I think we were owed the Mav/Bradley post-mission discussion. It bugs me that we didn't get it, and instead got the typical dude interaction where All Is Good just because they had a life-threatening experience together. :D But that's what fanfic is for, and there have been some great ones that have explored their dynamic after the film.

I also wish we'd gotten more of Payback & Fanboy's backstory or more characterizations with the two of them. But hopefully the Blu-Ray or something will have deleted scenes.

19. What do you wish you’d see more of in Top Gun fandom?

MORE LADIES! (Which, I get it, I do, I am falling into the exact same trap by writing All The Dudes, so if anyone out there wants to shoot me over some prompts for Phoenix or Halo or Penny or Amelia - y'all know how much I love writing her :D - or even Carole, hit me up!) And I don't mean, the ladies serving the dudes' story, but fics that explore them as three-dimensional characters with their own arcs.

Beyond that - and look, I know, okay, I know I'm in the minority here, but I, without shame, 1000000000000% ship the hell out of Hangman/Maverick, so ANY fics with those two would make me happy.

(Yes, I also ship Bradley/Maverick, but that pairing has more fic so far, so I'm not jonesing for it quite as much. :D)

[traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors]

Tw/Cw: therapy progression after childhood sexual trauma (not described in detail but the circumstances around are mentioned) victim blaming, family who did not notice something is off, did not ask for help, grooming mention, guilt, self blaming, fawn response, different laws about adulthood and consent

searching for advice or validation

I feel very comfortable with my (licenced trauma-) Therapist, after roundabout 2 years of therapy stabilising myself and working on dissociation issues, numbing and survival mode flashbacks triggers etc. (the pandemic going on doesn't make it easy).

I'm way better than I was when I started and now we both kind of agree it's time to take it a few steps further and stop making stabilising work, trust building stuff (sounds like we did not do much at all but we did a lot of work). It's my call but we'd have start revisiting the days where trauma ocured (or atleast the biggest) in a save guided way to process it but i'm still scared.

Like I said it's my call, I probably should so I can move on and stop surviving to keep living.

But there's so many reasons to be scared of even though I know I'm not alone and we'd take small steps. But how to start?

Its always so hard for me to take the first step in something I feel like I need some push otherwise I'm always just beating around the Bush without moving on.

But here are some things I'm afraid of maybe you can speak of your own experience or just help me sort this out?

(I talked to my Therapist about the things that scare me but I need to talk to someone else)

- memory issues: I remember the event(s) very vague (I dissociated) and I know this is okay maybe some memories won't come back and don't have to but it still feels like I'm lying when I try to piece things together (One part of my family who could've noticed because they were around (even though they didn't see it happen) doesn't believe me and deny my version of the story - which is not helpful at all) it scares me. Like what if my brain is just searching for attention and imagined parts of it or most or it or if it was my fault since I was a confused messed up (maybe groomed) teenager ?

- I kind of had a mix of a freeze and fawn response at the time and did my best to keep it from showing to the family members who were around who could have protected me if they'd known

- I also do know I went along with it maybe I got groomed, maybe it was a fawn response maybe I was a confused messed up teenager and wanted to experiment with an adult "friend" and now I'm traumatised by it. (It all recurred very hard before I started going to therapy )

I'm afraid to look at that how do I Handle that ?

Like he was from a different culture where the law probably would blame me for flirting with him or worse for making him do this (even though that's not what I wanted). I won't get closure on that. In that country which me and my family visited during vacation it be legal for a 13/14 year old to decide these things and I should have known better and the female part is always to blame.

This are the main things running through my head - sorry if it's a bit chaotic

I want to move on but I also want it to be over?

Like why can't I jump ahead in time to the timestamp after I processed everything?

hello anon!

firstly, the wording of the ask is fine and not chaotic, don’t worry! you don’t have to start if you’re not ready. it is completely valid if you wait longer - as long as you need. however, it sounds like you’re keen to hear some advice about how to start, and i’m proud of you for considering to take these steps.

on the memory issues: it’s very normal for people with trauma to have memory issues, especially fragmented pieces of memories or very vague knowledge of what happened. it certainly does not mean you’re faking. as you know, when your brain goes through trauma it often tries to forget pieces because they’re too much for you to deal with as a kid. there’s not really a reason that your brain would make up trauma memories, so it’s highly unlikely your memories are made up. and even if there are inaccurate parts, that doesn’t mean your trauma as a whole isn’t valid - it definitely is. you deserve to heal no matter what.

about not speaking up or "going along with" grooming - you were still a child. and a human being. im sorry you went through this, and you did not deserve what anyone did to you. at that age, you couldn’t give informed consent even if you said "yes", because you were too young. and, as an adult, he would absolutely know it was wrong to be in any sexual situation with it is also possible to be traumatised by consensual sexual experiences. again, even if minors could legally consent in that country, the gap between an 18 year old and someone 13/14 is extremely significant. he had legal and social power over you which he would have known, and used. your trauma is valid, and the abuse was certainly abuse. an abusers country doesn’t justify the abuse. nothing can.

i’m very sorry that people didn’t believe you. your experience was valid and sounds like it’s caused a lot of trauma. their opinions cannot take away from your reality.

it’s hard to move on from trauma. unfortunately, you can’t skip through time. it takes a lot of work and you have to get into your emotions and it’s difficult, but it sounds like you’ve found a psychologist who is well qualified, and who you have built a relationship with. i’m sure they will be understanding - feelings of guilt for the trauma, or doubting your memories, are very normal and valid emotions to come up when working through your trauma.

of course, it is ultimately your decision if you want to start talking about it with your therapist. and, you can always advocate for yourself - you can take a break, slow down, or wait for longer if you need to! working through trauma should always be on your own terms, with the therapist supporting these terms too. i wish you all the best with therapy.

- mod wren

[fayeimara]

Meant To Be Series || One For Every Billion

6. By My Side | Pt 1

- July 20th -

The park is as close to empty as it can be when your group arrives early in the morning. Since you've been staying with the Kageyamas, you drive up with Miwa and Tobio, meeting up with your mutual cousins, Ren and Shin, at the entrance to the park's hotel.

You've all made sure to capitalize on early access passes and are staying overnight to make the most of your time, so everyone drops off their things first before deciding what to do in the time you all have before the park opens to all regular pass holders.

The rest of you are just waiting on Miwa to meet you all back in the lobby from her room (she takes the longest, honestly) and you're pulling on the thigh-length sleeveless cardigan you grabbed to wear over your shorts and tank combo, when you finally hear her voice as she crosses from the elevator bay to your group by the doors.

"Okay kiddos, I'm off to the adults only section of this place so call me if you need anything. But try not to, you know?"

Well, Miwa is the eldest of the group here and you're sure she only came along because her best friend decided they could make a mini girls' vacation out of it and brought along her own younger siblings as an excuse.

Tobio looks a little frustrated when he replies, "Neesan, it's way to early in the morning to find a bar."

"Are you kidding me? Of course I'm not drinking. Yet. We're just going to the theme spa!" She happily exclaims, waving her hand in the air delicately, "So you know, try not to get lost or get hurt, because I don't want you interrupting some serious r and r."

Ren rolls his eyes at his cousins' interaction, as if he's any better. You're well aware he also already has plans to ditch the rest of your group when his friends arrive. Thankfully Shin interrupts before Tobio's easy temper is tripped.

"Hey let's hit up the new coaster! I want to see Tobi throw up!"

Okay, not helping. But you do want to try the new roller coaster, as well, you're a huge fan of any adrenaline inducing activities and there are only so many times you can try the ones back home before you're used to all the dips and twists. This new one is supposed to have the highest drop record internationally so far.

"Tobio you won't throw up, right?" You try to coax him to agreeing, "I think you'll enjoy it!"

He gives you a dry look as if to say, You didn't put any effort into that. So you shrug and decide to bribe him, "I'll buy you milk after."

He contemplates it for a moment before nodding. Success, as usual.

Miwa claps her hands together in excitement, "Perfect! Okay, so I've given Y/n the contacts for Eiko's sister and brothers. They're around here somewhere so please take some time to say hi. Tobio already knows Hikaru and Hiroshi so I'm sure you'll all get along great!"

Before any of you have time to respond, she's bounced off, presumptively towards the waterpark and spa area. Okay then, you turn back to your cousins with a big smile that only Shin returns, making him your favourite of the day. You're all for the deadpan look when you're bored or annoyed but you're actually so happy to be here, you love amusement parks.

"So... let's hit some coasters?"

"Yeah!" Surely, you can all guess who answers.

After spending about an hour hitting up several of the most popular rides and possibly traumatizing Tobio before the main rush of people arrive in the park, you get a buzz from your phone, sitting tight against your waist in an inner zippered pocket of your cardigan, with your cash and cards. It's really a pain to have to carry bags and even more so to have to stress about having it stolen so, being an avid coaster enthusiast, you like to keep your items simple on days like this.

Quickly moving out and to the side of the exit line to pull out your phone, you see a notification from Hana, the girl who is Miwa's friend's little sister.

, You look up and find your cousins also stopped when you @sakusasimpbot anding right by you. Thank god, you didn't want to have to drag them back here if they'd wandered away to the next ride.

"Hana and her brothers are on this ride so I told her we'd wait for them here."

Ren is typing on his phone but speaks up, "I'm about to head out to meet up with my friends." Finally finished with his own chat, he looks up at the rest of you, "Will you guys be okay from here? We can meet back for lunch."

Tobio just shrugs while you nod, Shin speaking for everyone when he tells his brother, "Yeah, yeah. Just go already, the 'real' adult already ditched us a while back so no need to act all mature here."

"Shut up, Shin." Ren returns his brother's smirk with a glare, which slides back into his expressionless gaze after he rolls his eyes and faces you and Tobio.

"We'll be fine, Ren, we're all in the same place and can call if anything." Your turn to reassure him where Shin clearly failed to even try.

Ren studies you for a moment before turning and throwing a casual, "..'kay." over his shoulder. You're sure you, Tobio, and Shin all share a mutual eye roll at that.

Shin has pulled up the park map on his phone, looking for a place where your group might want to grab a snack or drink, when the next line of people exit the ride.

Linking your arm with Tobio, you scan for a girl and two guys that look around your age. It's not hard because there really still aren't many people in this area of the park yet and the guys in question make an immediate beeline for the three of you when they lock eyes with Tobio. Right, since they know him already.

Hana is a pretty brunette with a bright smile on her face and you can immediately tell she's a fellow coaster enthusiast, if not adrenaline junkie, because of that wild happy look in her eyes.

Just as their group reaches yours, you smile back at her and say, "It's a really good one, right?"

"Yes!" She happily exclaims, "I felt like I was flying off the seat!"

You laugh at her enthusiasm, "Exactly, completely weightless."

Tobio introduces you and Shin to Hiroshi and Hikaru, who immediately tell you both to just call them Hiro and Karu. The two brothers have a relaxed vibe to them as well and, you swear, Karu and Shin click instantly. Not surprising, since they have a very similar outgoing and playful vibe, although you can attest from personal experience that Shin is probably the more mischievous and troublesome one. Karu has more of a happy and fun feel, if you're reading him correctly.

Hiro is equally nice and outgoing, with a slightly more chill personality that offsets Tobio's quiet intensity pretty well.

Hana is amazing and your first impression of her is only improved as you all sit down and talk over refreshing drinks at an outdoor café. She reminds you a lot of one of your friends back home, Aspen, in that down to earth and cheery kind of way so you immediately feel a sense of familiarity with her.

You find out that the siblings are each about a year apart, which coincidentally lines them up with Shin, you, and Tobio respectively. You had a feeling Miwa and her friend were pushing all of you to hang out here together for a reason. You definitely think she wanted her brother to spend time with a friend, especially after how tough things had been for him at school and with his club lately.

You look over at him when Hana briefly interjects into his and Hiro's conversation, completely relaxed for now with a bottle of cold milk in his hands. Yeah. He catches you looking and blinks in surprising, honestly shocking you when he returns your smile to him with a very small one of his own. You haven't seen him smile for quite a while, at least not the past several weeks you've been staying with his family. Probably not since the last time you saw him about a year and a half ago.

Oh, Tobio, you think as you look away to study the people passing by, I hope you're okay. He was always serious and direct, even as a little kid, but he never hesitated to smile when he felt happy. Does that mean he hasn't felt happy lately? For how long?

You have to shelf your concern away so you don't dampen the mood of this trip for everyone. Looking back to the others to make sure they're all finished up, you ask, "What do we want to do next?"

"None of us have tried these ones across the park," Shin speaks up, "So maybe make a circle this way back around?"

You catch Hana's disappointed expression just before she wipes it away and says, "I was hoping to try the new one, it's supposed to be exhilarating!"

"They already went on it, Hana." Karu gently replies but you shake your head and say, "Sure, but I loved it. I'd be really happy to go again!"

"Really?"

"Yeah! Why don't we split up? If the guys actually start from the other side of the circuit they planned, we should catch up to them in no time and group back up."

Karu and Hiro exchange looks and shrug, Karu stating, "I'm okay with that if you guys stick together and message us updates so we know you're safe and also don't miss each other as the park fills up more." He looks to your cousins and asks, "What about you guys? What do you think?"

Tobio's still looking at where you pointed out your plan of action on the map displayed from Shin's phone but it's really Shin who you have to make sure agrees. After all, Tobio is younger than you by a year, but Shin is older than you by that same length. Even though it's never something you think any of you typically consider, you remember the little incident last summer where he got chewed out by Ren and hope he's not decided to be a little more strict with you.

You catch him looking at you with a sardonic gleam in his eye and realize both your thoughts are probably very aligned. If he does decide to veto your idea, it won't be because he believes he needs to be strict, it'll be purely out of his innate need to torment you. Ugh.

"Okay," What? Ahh, now you're even more suspicious but it sounds like he's accepting your plan, "keep the sound on your phone high though, and call immediately if there's an emergency."

Yeah, sure, at this point you have a line of people who've told you to call them right away but if he hasn't considered that, you're not saying it.

So instead, you brightly agree, "Of course!" earning a doubtful look from him.

Oh well. You reach for Hana but she's already grabbing your hand instead and you both rush away to the new ride calling over your shoulder, "See you later!"

You both ignore whatever they call out after the two of you, giggling and debating where you want to sit on the ride instead.

"Y/n!" You hear a familiar voice call out your name in excitement just as you both reach the line up for the first ride and you feel butterflies take flight in your stomach, spreading electric tingles through you with the flutter of their delicate wings. Wow. Well, you know even before you turn around who it's going to be.

Prev | Next

Masterlist

Behind The Scenes!

-Y/n and Toru can really dance around the things they really want to talk about, even when some things are called out directly by both...

-Y/n doesn't always catch herself calling him 'Toru' out loud (or over text even), clearly that's what she calls him in her head <3 but she usually is aware of what name she's using when she speaks it out loud, or she just avoids calling him directly at all

-But much like when she says 'I'm sorry Toru' in that 4th panel, it happens... she didn't realize it, it was just a heartfelt apology that she was trying to genuinely express

-She won't say she wasn't expecting him to ask to spend his birthday with her, even if they've messaged constantly for the past year

-Which is why she felt so bad when he reached out about it early in the month... and why she wasn't focused on how she addressed him... but then calls him Oikawa in the next panel

-He notices all the slips, whether he teases comments or not

-Tobio and roller coasters... :'D

A/N: Hmm, I wonder who this new person could be... lmao, hope you guys have liked part one so far, the ride only gets wilder from here ;)

Taglist: @delusivist, @prettyinblack231, @kac-chowsballs, @sakusasimpbot, @hawkthekinnie

[sebastianshaw]

RP Meme from The Lost Boys

I told you to stay off the boardwalk.

Hey, I liked that song.

I don't see any boogeymen or nasty guys.

Wait. That's from my era!

That's the ocean air.

Smells like someone died.

Looks like he's dead. No, he's just a deep sleeper.

If he's dead, can we go back to [PLACE]?

What's wrong with this picture? There's no TV. Have you seen a TV? I haven't seen a TV.

You're the only woman I ever knew who didn't improve her situation by getting divorced.

A big legal war wasn't going to improve anybody's situation.

Ouch. My hair.

Talk about the Texas Chainsaw Massacre.

We've got some rules around here. Second shelf is

mine. That's where I keep my root beers and my double-thick Oreo cookies. Nobody touches the second shelf but me.

There's another rule around here, and I want you to pay

close attention. Don't touch anything. Everything is exactly where I want it.

There are some bad elements around here.

You're telling me we've moved to the murder capital of the world?

If all the corpses buried around here were to stand up all at once we'd have one hell of a population problem.

I just like to read the TV Guide. Read the TV Guide, you don't need a TV.

I was so worried. Don't run off like that.

We were that age, too, once. Only they dress better.

You have a generous nature. I like that in a person.

So how may I help you this evening? We have it all.

I look that needy, huh?

You're chasing that girl, aren't you?

I'm at the mercy of your sex glands.

Don't you have something better to do than follow me around all night?

Just scoping your civilian wardrobe.

Listen buddy, if you're looking for the diet frozen-yogurt bar, it went out of business last summer.

That's a very serious book, man.

Only five in existence.

Where the hell are you from? Krypton?

Nobody drives this baby but me.

We have to let it warm up a little. Hear that sound? Just like a baby pussycat.

That's as close to town as I like to get.

It's a pretty cool place. If you're a Martian. Or a vampire.

Are you guys sniffing old newsprint or something?

You think you really know what's happening here, don't you? Well, I'll tell you something. You don't know shit buddy.

This is just our cover. We are dedicated to a higher

purpose. We're fighters for Truth Justice, and the American

way.

Think of it more as a survival manual.

There's our number on the back and pray you never need to call us.

I'll pray I never need to call you.

If you want your ear pierced, I'll do it.

I came this close to being called Moon Beam or Moon Child Or something like that.

I can't beat your bike.

You don't have to beat me, [NAME]. You just have to try

and keep up.

Just you! Come on! Just you!

That's what I love about this place. You ask, and then you get.

I can never sleep with the closet door open, either. Not even a crack.

Don't sneak up on people like that!

What, you don't like rice? Tell me [NAME], how could a

billion Chinese people be wrong? Come on!

You're eating maggots. How do they taste?

Sorry about that. No hard feelings, huh?

Drink some of this, [NAME]. Be one of us.

Give me those sunglasses.

You need sunglasses to talk on the phone?

Are you freebasing? Inquiring minds want to know.

Anything in here that might pass for after-shave?

Have a big date tonight, [NAME]?

Lose the earring, [NAME]. It's not you. It's definitely

not you.

All you do is give attitude lately.

Go take your bath.

What did you do to my dog, asshole?

I didn't hurt him. He bit me. This is my blood.

Why did he bite you, huh? What did you do to him?

He was protecting you.

Look at your reflection in the mirror. You're a creature of

the night, [NAME]. Just like out of a comic book.

My own brother/sister/friend/etc, a goddam shit-sucking vampire.

You wait 'til[NAME] finds out!

Just let me talk. Wait a minute! [NAME]!

You did the right thing by calling us.

Does the sunlight freak him out?

He wears sunglasses in the house.

He always had bad breath, though.

He's a vampire all right. Here's what you do.

I can't do that! He's my brother/sister/mother/friend/etc!

You better get yourself a garlic T-shirt, buddy. Or it's

your funeral.

I think we have to have a real long talk about something.

[NAME] help! He's coming to get me!

[NAME], help me! Open up! Help me! [NAME], open the window!

So what are you, the flying nun?

We're gonna work this out. We*re gonna work this out. Trust

me, okay?

I thought I saw something on my window, but I guess I got carried away.

I would like to have a personal life too.

Can I sleep in here with you tonight?

You smell like garlic.

What's happening to me, [NAME]?

I don't know how to help you.

Aren't we friends anymore?

Then let's act like friends. Let's talk.

We could talk about anything you want to talk about.

I have more serious things on my mind than girls and school. Things I'm dealing with.

Looks like I wasn't the only one who got lucky last night.

The dog chased my mom like the Hounds of Hell from Vampires

Everywhere.

We've been aware of some very serious vampire activity in

town for a long time.

[PLACE] has become a haven for the undead.

As a matter of fact, we're almost certain that ghouls and

werewolves occupy high position at City Hall.

Kill your brother/sister/boyfriend/aunt/best friend/etc, you'll feel better!

Look, it says here that if you kill the head vampire all half-vampires will return to normal.

Does he know who the head vampire is?

You'll have to kill him. And if you don't, we will.

Vampire require a daytime protector, a guardian to watch

over them as they sleep. Fierce dogs, the Hounds of Hell,

are often employed for this purpose.

Truth, Justice, The American way triumphs.

Smells good. When do we eat?

Are we gonna have company again?

Well, you are the man of the house and I'm not coming in until you invite me.

He promises to behave if you come back.

I didn't know you were having guests.

Our batting average isn't terrific, is it? Zero for two.

You're so sweet to him.

I don't know what got in to him. He's not like that.

If you ever want to see [NAME] again, you better come with

us now.

Initiation's over, [NAME]. Time to join the club.

Don't kill me, [NAME]. I'm basically a good kid, so just

don't kill me.

Just work with me and I can help you. You'll be okay.

Is she one of them?

You shut the window and lock your door.

She's one of them! And don't tell me it doesn't make her a

bad person, [NAME]!

Yes, and it's my fault. You would've not met me, if I

hadn't liked you. I tried to warn you.

You drank someone's blood? Are you crazy?

We're not them.

Why didn't you kill me last night?

You're supposed to be my first.

What are you doing here? What do you want from me?

Don't kill anybody until we get back to you!

I got connections.

The night crawler. The bloodsucker. El Vampiro.

I don't want you going down there.

Look, this isn't a comic book, [NAME]. These guys are

brutal killers.

Who'd you rather go down in with you? Them or me?

If something happens down there, I won't have the strength

to protect you.

This time I'll protect you.

Even though you're a vampire, you're still my brother/sister/friend/etc

If you try to stop us, or vamp out in any way, I'll stake

you without even thinking twice about it!

Where did you say you met these guys?

Don't you touch her. Stay away from her.

Flies and the undead go together like bullets and guns.

There must be coffins here someplace.

I thought they'd be in coffins.

That's what this cave is. It's one giant coffin.

Right now they're at their most vulnerable. Easy pickings.

Remember. You just have to kill the leader.

We don't know which one he is.

I guess we'll just have to kill them all.

What's that, a little vampire humor? It wasn't funny.

Good night, bloodsucker.

We blew it, man! We lost it!

We unraveled in the face of the enemy!

They pulled a mind-scramble on us!

We don't ride with vampires.

"Burn rubber" does not mean warp speed!

Your dog knows a flesh-eater when he smells one.

The sun goes down. They'll be looking for us.

[PLACE] is crawling with vampires

They're coming to the house as soon as it gets dark!

I'm gonna see [NAME] tonight, and you're trying to ruin it for me.

I don't know what you don't want me to see.

I'm not talking about [NAME]! To hell with [NAME]!

Good. That's just the way we like it.

We've got a date tonight?

They'll be coming for all of us.

It's just old memories coming back.

Why are you so jumpy tonight?

He seemed so sincere, but it's insane.

Tell me. I promise not to laugh. Honest.

I think I should warn you all when a vampire dies, it's never a pretty sight.

Some yell and scream. Some go quietly. Some explode. Some implode. But all will try to take you with them.

Don't go out there! Stop him!

I say we terminate them right now.

You're mine. You killed [NAME]

Try the holy water, dead breath!

I nailed one of them downstairs with a bow and arrow.

We trashed the one that looked like Twisted Sister.

We totally annihilated his night stalkin' ass!

Death to all vampires!

We are awesome monster bashers!

Holy shit! The attack of Eddie Monster!

Stop! Get away from him! Just stay away from him! He's just

a little boy.

You're afraid to face me, [NAME]?

I tried to make you immortal.

You tried to make me a killer!

Stop fighting me, [NAME]. I don't want to kill you. Join us.

It is too late, my blood is in your veins.

Don't let them see me like this.

What happened to your face?

I knew it. You are the head vampire.

You're the secret [NAME] was protecting.

Don't ever invite a vampire into your house, you silly boy/girl/etc.

It renders you powerless.

Has everyone gone crazy? What's the matter with all of you?

It was you I was after, all along, [NAME]

It was all going to be so perfect, [NAME]

Just like one big happy family.

Great. The bloodsucking Brady Bunch.

I still want you, [NAME]. I haven't changed my mind about that.

I didn't invite you this time, [NAME]

Don't you touch my mother/father/son/dog/etc

Don't fight, [NAME]. It's so much better if you don't fight.

How much do you think we should charge them for this?

One thing about living in [PLACE] I never could

stomach--all the damn vampires.

[punkscowardschampions]

Jac & Savannah

Jac: Cannot stop thinking about that one dress in that last boutique we checked out though... Jac: so lowkey mad at Isabelle for having to go home to walk her dog 🙄😩 Savannah: UGH I know! Don't get me started yet again on how her mum is literally never there to do anything for it & they don't even have a garden Savannah: I'll go back & get it for you, she can't stop me Savannah: I have less than zero reasons to hurry home Jac: Lowkey like, who do I call again? 😬 Jac: the poor thing, as if breathing wasn't issue enough without having to contend with getting overweight and her mum's vape habit Jac: You're so pure 🥺🥺 Jac: and I'm personally not over seeing you in that one shade of pink like ??? Jac: 👼🏾 walking Savannah: ^^^  the levels of cruelty make my heart hurt, honestly 😢 but I won't get to Heaven until I convince them to see the error of their ways & that is a battle I simply do not have the energy for today Savannah: you could literally wear that AWFUL dress that Isabelle was considering- thank god we talked her out of that much! 🙌🏾- & still look like an actual goddess Jac: Seriously, I don't know how they can live with themselves Jac: that would be their business, because I'm not as caring as you, or even close, but the fact it hurts you means it's mine too 😤 Jac: actually though, would have had to pretend to not know her, oh my God Jac: not to mention how short it was, as well as just hideous...like this is a SCHOOL event, girl, I... 🤦 Jac: it does mean we're scheduled to help her keep looking though Jac: which is becoming a trial, like I'm so sorry to say but wow Savannah: I likewise don't have the necessary reserves to try and teach her the difference between positive & negative attention Savannah: Can Amelia not help her look? I highly doubt her wardrobe is fully stocked with suitable school event dresses so surely she still needs to keep looking too? Jac: That's a whole conversation her mother should be having with her but also needs Jac: sad, really Jac: Poor, poor Is Jac: Meels is a committed outfit repeater, no matter the occasion Savannah: She can't wear jeans to this though Jac: 🙄 I've also tried on that subject Jac: it'll just become a whole THING Jac: us trying to sort both of them out and getting nowhere with our own looks Savannah: 😔 I'm exhausted by their indecision, it's taking the excitement out of it Savannah: I understand that they can't and don't feel themselves in just anything, but it's getting ridiculous Jac: ^^ Totally agree Jac: although us being on the same page is not anything like a surprise these days Jac: it's so unfair, really Jac: they're not even THAT bothered about the whole thing Jac: we've put effort in before this whole step even Savannah: I knew you'd understand, despite feeling like I'm the one who is being totally unfair by saying anything, the rational part of my mind which isn't on the verge of tears as a result of Is' complaints or Amelia's apathy is like no, Savannah, you're not wrong Savannah: it does matter to us & it's allowed to be viewed as important Savannah: not to mention enjoyable, god forbid Jac: You NEVER need to doubt yourself Jac: you're a complete empath, honestly, to your own detriment Jac: but that isn't your fault and people should try to give even a fraction of what you give them back Jac: so, for your wellbeing, I'm calling a time-out on this and them Jac: you've got to focus on you for once ❤ Savannah: I can't tell you how wholeheartedly I wish I was the person you think I am, Ty & I had a HUGE fight earlier & I've been plagued by self doubt ever since Jac: Oh no, okay, what was said? Savannah: He seemed to think that we had plans today, which is not a conversation I remember us having, so of course I wasn't going to cancel on you all Savannah: & that makes me the most thoughtless girlfriend he's ever had Savannah: I'm so sorry the girl you dated for like two weeks dropped everything without a second thought if you even hinted that you wanted her too because she didn't have a life Savannah: they broke up for that exact reason Jac: He's totally got the wrong day Jac: you don't double-book Jac: not dragging him, he's clearly just so busy with his own stuff too but yeah, no way Jac: he'll work it out and owe you a great apology Savannah: it was beyond upsetting, I swear I need a mental health break from everyone but you Jac: I get it Jac: no boy drama but my family are driving me INSANE right now Jac: I vote we go test 💅 colours and get a hand massage to boot Savannah: Can we? I don't want to be responsible for causing you more family drama Jac: Ugh, no, they're fine Jac: and you're more important than any of this drama, Is and Amelia's too Savannah: ^^ I don't care how hard Ty is sulking, I'm not going to leave you to cope with them on your own Savannah: you needed my help first Jac: Like, he can't put that on you Savannah: he's never spoken to me that way before & I have no idea where it came from Jac: Is he under a lot of pressure right now, on the team? Jac: or at home, school Jac: either way, the issue is not with you, and he probably knows that already Savannah: No, everything's going really well Jac: 🤔 Savannah: It's me, it has to be Jac: You've not done what he's saying you have Jac: accusing would be too strong a word but Jac: we'll work it out but I'm totally clueless right now Savannah: me too 😢 Jac: Lowkey mad at him now Savannah: I shouldn't have even said anything, I told myself that I wasn't going to Savannah: but then Isabelle & Amelia started sulking too & it brought it all back Jac: No, I want to be there for you Jac: and make you feel better Jac: which I definitely will Jac: but I just can't explain away why he's being like this 🥺😢 Jac: and I wish I could Savannah: You'll definitely make me cry, you're the best Savannah: he was acting as though I don't make time for him, which is not true, but if it were, the reason would be that nobody deserves as much of it as you Jac: making you cry doesn't sound like something the best would do Jac: you've got to have your own lives, own friends Jac: you do NOT wanna be THAT couple Savannah: if you don't want my tears because I couldn't be happier to have found the love of my life, I'll keep them in, since they are yours, it's totally fine Savannah: yes, exactly & he knows that, he has more friends than extra-curriculars & he has as many of those as I do Savannah: it doesn't make any sense Jac: I will treasure them Jac: and make sure they never, ever spill for anything less than the happiest of moments, because that is all you deserve Jac: I could talk to him...totally on the low and in the most well-intentioned way Jac: maybe it's something he doesn't want to burden you with? but he has accidentally burdened you with this doubt and worry instead Savannah: 🥰🤗 Savannah: you'd do that? Jac: Of course! Jac: You're my soul sister, so I hope Ty at least considers me a friend too at this point Jac: he's going to have to get used to having me around 😅 Savannah: if he doesn't we have a bigger problem than I thought because I love you so much Savannah: & I will run away with you if anyone ever tries to make me choose 😄 Jac: He's smart, he's not gonna do that Jac: though honestly, I could do with the break right now, would not say no Savannah: maybe we could have one, it's essentially my right as a child of a broken home to play my parents off against each other Savannah: & if my dad is foolish enough to believe he can buy back any of my love or respect after what he's done, why should I feel bad for treating him like one Savannah: I refuse to, I do need to focus on myself Jac: In terms of making-up-to-do, he's in the lead no question, or so far behind everyone else, looking at it that way Jac: I think it would be the most appropriate way to end transition year Jac: God knows if my parents would go for it 🙄 Savannah: I'll talk to them, I've never lost a debate so far & I couldn't be any more well intentioned, my heart is in the exact right place Jac: 👼🏾🥰 Jac: next year is when everything gets REAL Jac: we need the holiday we are NOT going to get until...I don't even want to think about the next time we'll be able to take a real break after this Savannah: ^^^ Savannah: whatever I have to do to make it happen & be perfect, so be it Jac: the salon is the EXACT right place to plan all this Jac: all the inane questions they ask about your holidays will actually be useful for once 🤭 Savannah: 😄 Jac: This is like, just a you and me thing, right? Savannah: of course Jac: Okay because helping Isabelle pick bikinis is the opposite of fun 😂 Savannah: oh my god, I don't even want to imagine Jac: if the dress breakdowns aren't bad enough Jac: we'd be so stressed we'd be put on the no-fly list, honestly Savannah: Amelia would probably throw my body into the sea, weighted down by rocks or Isabelle's dog, I swear she hates me Jac: How could anyone hate you? Jac: and she's friends with me, so her taste can't be THAT off Savannah: we won't mention that she's also friends with Is Savannah: any excuse to talk about how perfect you are instead Jac: I seriously think if we wouldn't, who would 😶 Jac: you'll make me 😳 Savannah: OH! The tans we'll both get Savannah: you'll be sightseeing & I'll just be staring at you in disbelief because you somehow got even more beautiful Jac: Oh please Jac: you're so stunning they'd be running to write new laws just to make it illegal how good you look Savannah: stop, nobody can see me 😳 but I still feel it Savannah: it should be illegal how you make me feel Jac: sorry, but a world where you don't know and aren't told how perfect you are is just not one I wanna live in 💁 Savannah: I don't deserve you, all I've done today is mope & wish your friends away so that I can have you all to myself Jac: We deserve each other Jac: if I didn't have you, who would I be able to get excited about this with? Jac: I'd be going on my own, most likely Savannah: okay, you're right Jac: I just get sad thinking about all the time we weren't friends and didn't know each other properly before Savannah: No, don't be sad, baby, we trust in the universe because it was meant to be now not then Savannah: lord knows I needed my glow up before I could be around you Savannah: 👼🏻✨🌞💛 Jac: That's true Jac: I'm more thankful that we have NOW and the promise of forever than I could ever be sad Jac: definitely not ignoring how blessed I am Jac: also blessed that my hair grew back in and I lost the puppy fat look 😬🤦 Savannah: I stand by what I said when I first saw the pictures Savannah: you were ADORABLE Jac: you're too sweet but I'm not gonna complain about it 🥰 Savannah: It's true & you know that because I would never jeopardise our connection Savannah: you're the only person I can talk to with total honesty, it's so important to me Jac: I only feel like myself with you Jac: no one else gets it all Savannah: I feel like a better person when I'm with you Savannah: but with none of the pressure that my parents put on me not to fail or the fear I have of letting Ty down Jac: You're the best person Jac: if all I do is give you the confidence to believe that, then that's totally worth it Savannah: You're going to achieve everything you want Jac: I can't wait to be Dr Taylor to your Dr Moore Savannah: 😊 Savannah: I'll be there to make sure every second of your life is worth it until then & of course after Jac: Naturally ❤ Jac: have you seen the groupchat? Savannah: please don't judge me for not having opened it Jac: I couldn't even when I'm just sat here like 🤨😑 Jac: Is has sent a million links and they seem to be getting worse every one I open ??? Savannah: Well I can't face that until later when I'm 🛀🏾🥂 Savannah: not that I'll be staying at Ty's unless he apologises to me Jac: You can always stay with me Savannah: I don't think any of your family would be fine about the always, but I wish I could Jac: They'll deal, I have to put up with all of them so 💁 Jac: I'm trying to persuade them to move the sofa bed from the hangout area to the music room, make it more of a spare room too, more privacy Jac: it's not fair that Jesse has a whole room with all his crap in, there's plenty of space in said hangout room for him Savannah: 😄 I'm sure we could win that debate too, I definitely have as much passion about the subject as you if it means I don't have to go home Savannah: it's impossible to 🛀🏾🥂 when my mum is mid-breakdown in her en-suite Jac: 😬😥 Jac: she needs to convert the passion she had for couples therapy for solo therapy now Savannah: Honestly! It's a full time job making sure she's adequately but not over medicated & if I'm worrying about it I know Sienna is Savannah: I have to unlock the door to let her in & before I know it I'm re-doing her braids or checking her homework, all the while my bath water is going cold Jac: You're actually such a good sister, and daughter Jac: In awe of you Jac: I wish you didn't have to work as hard as you do, but it's really admirable Savannah: like, so sorry that you had to go home to walk your dog, Isabelle 🙄 it's no wonder she doesn't understand me Jac: She doesn't even try Jac: she lives on planet Is where the most important thing is which bland boy she's going to get off with next Jac: I can't claim so many of your experiences and struggles but I respect the hell out of you, and try to make your life easier where and when I can Savannah: oh my god, the boy from the other night! I can't Jac: 🤢 Jac: her taste! Jac: worrying Jac: ugly dresses are the least of her problems Jac: I feel like I can't leave her alone sometimes, honestly Savannah: if this thing with Ty is leading to a break up I refuse to date any of the boys in our school Savannah: that would be another full time job working out which of them have & haven't done what with her & when Jac: tell me about it 🙄 Jac: they're all so lacklustre Savannah: ^^^ Savannah: we know our worth & we're simply too good for any of them unless they have a serious emotional glow up of their own Jac: Mhmm Jac: Ty is never gonna break up with you though Savannah: I don't know anymore, I never thought he would raise his voice to me Jac: That's pretty out of order Jac: he knows about your dad, what he's like Savannah: & it's really out of character too Jac: Yeah, totally Jac: men and anger issues are a whole can of worms Jac: there's something he isn't dealing with, for sure Savannah: or something he's not telling me Savannah: I just hope it's not a someone Jac: who could even come close to you? Jac: he's not that cliche of having the perfect girl and risking it on some skank Savannah: Logically I know that but I'm so scared Jac: Babe 🥺 Jac: you NEED to put you first, even just for the length of this nail appointment Jac: you don't need this extra stress from him Jac: I've started the convo, you can read it all once we get to the meat of it Savannah: I just want to be excited about 💅🏾 & all the iconic outfits we saw Savannah: it's SO unfair Jac: I hate this Jac: I wish I could take you away right now Savannah: you do, I'd be even more a wreck if you weren't the amazingly intuitive person you are, earlier without even having to be told I was upset you made me feel better over and over again Savannah: and right now you know what I need, way before I can put it into words or coherent thoughts Jac: we trust the connection too 💫💐💞 Savannah: I love you Savannah: I'm not devoting time & space to anyone else today, from this point on Jac: and we're definitely getting lunch after, my treat Savannah: no, mine Savannah: you've already been taking such good care of me Jac: Okay, but we will be going [place] and I will be getting you your favourite dessert Jac: no arguments 😘 Savannah: Okay, I won't fight you on it Jac: there are so many more important, and fun, decisions for us to make Savannah: ^^^!! Savannah: is Is still trying to force you to make outfit decisions for her though? Jac: I've said we've got more pressing matters right now Jac: I've made it sound like a me issue though, don't worry Jac: they'll have to cope without us for a while Savannah: Thank you, I can't cope with their relationship advice at the best of times Jac: Yeah, there's less than zero chance they'd have anything useful to say so Jac: they don't need to know Savannah: We won't tell them about the holiday plans either, that way you'll have a nice secret to keep as well as my stupid boyfriend drama Jac: to secrets 🥂 Savannah: 🥂 Savannah: Are you still thinking about that dress or have I ruined everything? Jac: You could never ruin anything with me Jac: so yes Jac: but I'm also remembering that other shop we didn't even get a chance to check out Savannah: their window display is INCREDIBLE ✨ Savannah: we should go Jac: I KNOW Jac: I've been window shopping every time I go past Jac: and to be fair, I think it's a bit out of Isabelle's price range, so it actually wouldn't be nice to take her there Savannah: the universe has spoken, I'm taking you there, our secret Jac: 🥰 Jac: I swear I only have fun when I'm with you Savannah: you're so much fun that nobody considers you might not be having any, but I promise I'll always think about you & what you need Jac: You'll make me cry now Savannah: Baby, no 🥺 if you start you'll set me off again Savannah: I'm a really ugly crier & you look like an 👼🏻 Jac: Okay, okay, no crying Jac: we'll stay flawless Savannah: that's harder work for me than it could ever be for you, but I'll do my best Jac: You're the most perfect person I've ever known Jac: inside and out Savannah: I feel that way about you, I'm not just saying it like, oh sure, me too Savannah: you're so perfect I should hate you Jac: Yeah, I know Jac: sorta been there done that Jac: not that I ever hated you really Savannah: I couldn't Jac: No, in the way how perfect you are SHOULD be impossible, that's how hating you felt Savannah: that's it exactly Savannah: & I just wanted you to notice me, I'd wait all day sometimes, getting more extra about everything Jac: It was like, I should've been mad at you but I could only ever be impressed Savannah: Well, I can't lie, I'm glad because I've never worked that hard for anyone before Savannah: it'd be super awkward if I failed Jac: 😅 Jac: I'm flattered Jac: how many boys wish, like Savannah: of course, but boys are easy Jac: duh, if you need to try then you've got bigger problems Savannah: I don't understand what Amelia's is, a smile & a hair flip & she could be dating anyone in our year Jac: Yeah, me either Jac: maybe she's had the same 💭 about Isabelle's seconds Savannah: 😄 Savannah: at this point I'm seriously expecting her to come out as asexual Jac: 🤔 maybe you're onto something Savannah: I do have good instincts for these things Jac: True Savannah: one of Sienna's friends is & nobody's been anything but really supportive about it Savannah: her year group are so sweet though Savannah: I was not like that a year ago Jac: Awh Jac: yeah, she knows we'd all support her Jac: and no one is going to say anything to her Jac: no one with half a brain cell anyway Savannah: & even if things were said it'd be no worse than what they say about her now Jac: Facts Jac: I don't know if she 1. genuinely doesn't hear 2. pretends not to or 3. seriously doesn't care Savannah: & you know her better than anyone so if you aren't sure she probably isn't either Jac: 😕 Jac: if she gave any indication, I'd do everything to help her Savannah: I know you would Savannah: I'm honestly so jealous of how close you two are & have been for like, ever Jac: but we're just as close now Savannah: I can't help but envy all the shared history you have though, all the pictures & stories that I'm obviously left out of Savannah: I shouldn't think like that, I know Savannah: but sometimes it does get to me, even though I try & be a better person than that Jac: We're going to make so many memories together though Jac: from now 'til forever Savannah: of course we are Savannah: it's no wonder he also accused me of being over sensitive, that one is very clearly true Jac: people just say that when they don't want to make allowances for other people's inconvenient feelings Jac: you can feel that, and I feel it too Jac: I wish you had been there Savannah: it just feels like she brings up all these past anecdotes as often as she does to try & leave me out Savannah: but maybe she doesn't realise how much it hurts me Jac: I'm sure she doesn't, but I'll make extra effort to clock it and get her to chill now Jac: we don't need to dwell on the past, especially at our age 🙄 Savannah: I don't want to cause friction, I can totally understand her wanting to reminisce, if we'd known each other then, I'd be the same Savannah: I talk & think about you literally all the time as it is Jac: Not even Jac: I don't want you feeling left out, or anyone Savannah: you would never Jac: you're so important to me Savannah: you've always let me know that Jac: 🥰 Savannah: I don't know how I would cope with anything that's going on in my life right now without you Savannah: I didn't even realise how badly I needed someone to talk to Jac: You look after everyone, you need someone to look after you Savannah: I can't rely on anyone to do that though Jac: me 🙋 Savannah: you can't leave me ever, I swear I'll go crazier than my mother Jac: I never will Jac: I promise Savannah: okay, I'm yours to look after then Jac: I can cope with that 😄 Savannah: you've definitely handled me at my worst, I haven't forgotten my bathroom breakdown, trust me Savannah: the embarrassment will last forever Jac: it so easily could have been me Jac: and maybe I wouldn't have had the courage to ever reach out if not, frame it like that Savannah: No, I hate that Jac: Okay, but no embarrassment either Jac: because you're the strongest person I know, and nothing I've learnt about you has changed that opinion Savannah: Well, I think you're the bravest & I fully believe you'll always find the courage to do whatever you want Jac: 🤞 Jac: I've got a lot of things I want and intend to do Savannah: 👏🏾 Yes girl! Savannah: I can't wait for transition year to be over Jac: Ugh, I know Jac: on the one hand, LOVE the extra opportunities and learning experiences they simply do not bother with the rest of the time Jac: but the other half is having to do lessons I have NO intention of carrying on with, which is just, pointless Savannah: ^^^^^^^^^ Savannah: my auntie was complaining at me as if it was OPTIONAL & I CHOSE it, excuse me Jac: Ha! 🙄 Jac: we all know it's meant to be in theory Jac: but if you don't go to a school with a high teacher to child ratio, with the budget and time to care about tailoring the learning experience to each child...then you're gonna have to do it with the rest, like it or lump it Savannah: She's a product of the American school system, there is zero place for her criticism Jac: and I- 😶 Jac: even our worst school would be preferable I'm sorry 😂 Savannah: Right?! Jac: Compared to the English and American systems, except maybe the super-elite English ones, I feel like we're still going to be at an advantage when we go to Uni Savannah: Agreed Savannah: even this year we've totally made the most of so far Jac: You've got to Jac: or you'll end up with a mediocre life and what is the point in even living Savannah: Ugh, exactly Savannah: I can already tell who is going to end up living like that Jac: I know right Jac: like, sorry to break it to you, but they're called FORMATIVE years for a reason Savannah: mhmmmm Jac: you can still have fun without ruining your life and future Jac: you just have to work hard too and some people are simply too lazy 💁 Savannah: ^^ we manage to have it all Savannah: I'm not sorry if they don't want it enough to secure it for themselves Jac: Exactly Jac: can't be sorry for you if you chose to act that way Jac: maybe some of them will turn it around years down the line but it'll be so much harder than if they'd put the work in when they were meant to Savannah: It breaks my heart that everybody doesn't have you to guide & hype them Jac: Only you deserve me though, that's the truth of it Savannah: I'm willing to work at that for the rest of my life too so Jac: 🥺 Jac: Ugh, I just love you Jac: you've really solidified all my life choices, if that makes sense Jac: like I know now everything I want is exactly what I need too Savannah: It makes perfect sense & I feel it too Jac: Thank God you do Savannah: My family are always pushing me to go to Trinity, they don't understand at all Jac: like, yeah, it's a good Uni, but we've done Dublin Jac: it's also the point of Uni to expand your horizons, put roots down somewhere else Jac: your hometown and Uni town are NOT meant to be the same Savannah: ^^ thank you Savannah: Sienna is the only one whose opinion is valid because I will be leaving her here alone for a year before she can go wherever she decides to & she'll actually miss me Savannah: my parents just want to control me Jac: Right, you aren't being selfish about it Jac: it's because you're too useful to them, like you said, looking after Sienna and your mum Jac: but those are actually both jobs your dad took on when he got married and made a family so Jac: he still has to deal with them Savannah: He gets to literally walk out but god forbid I take the next step in my life Jac: Right, he has to realize you are not a surrogate carer Jac: and that sorting those things out will always be his responsibility Savannah: He takes no responsibility for abandoning us never mind the fact that he spent years emotionally destroying my mum & then walking out when he didn't like who she became Jac: He's going to have to face his blame one day Jac: if nothing else, he does love you and Sienna, he wouldn't let anything really bad happen to you two Savannah: I don't feel loved, I feel like he decided none of us were good enough Savannah: maybe I'm too much like her for him to handle too Jac: I hate that he's made you feel like that Jac: but if anything, that shows failure on his part, not yours Jac: you're brilliant and loving and you're still there, even though it's so much for you to handle Jac: you don't need him, but that doesn't mean he shouldn't be held accountable right now, and that it's shit that he isn't stepping up Savannah: I hate him & I can't stand that he's made me carry hate in my heart when that isn't who I want to be Jac: Oh, Sav Jac: you wouldn't hold negative feelings towards him if he wasn't giving you that energy first Jac: you're never a doormat, again, it shows you're strong Savannah: Don't let me be with Ty, okay? Jac: Promise Savannah: Throw my phone into the 🛀🏾 if you have to, I'll forgive you Jac: 😅 I've got it in writing Savannah: 😄 Jac: would never drop it in 🥂 Jac: such a waste Savannah: Lord no, I need the full 🍾 Jac: 🙌 I can get behind that Jac: it's been a DAY Savannah: it had it's genuine 🙌🏾 moments nevertheless, because of & featuring you Savannah: I've looked at the pictures so many times, I CANNOT believe you really look like that Jac: 😳 says you Savannah: yes & I'm going to keep saying it until it sinks in for both of us that you're the most beautiful person that has ever existed because I'm hoping that if it does for me, at least, whatever dress you choose won't take my breath away as soon as I see you in it Savannah: otherwise you'll be trying to twirl but also having to catch me as I legitimately faint Jac: you'll have to not kill me before then or I won't be any use to anyone Jac: just a blushy mess on the floor Savannah: that isn't fair, on the one hand, you can't die, I need you, but on the other that sounds ADORABLE Jac: it's unfair how much of an 👼🏾 you are to me but I don't wanna share so Savannah: pink is one of my favourite colours, you know this & you wear it so well 🌺😳🌷 Jac: I'll wear it for you Jac: even if I don't go for that dress Jac: I wonder if we can get corsages or is that too extra 🤔 Savannah: I'll get that dress if it makes you happy, I'll wear anything you want me to, including a corsage Savannah: there is no such thing as too extra when you're talking about 🌷 🌹 🌺 🌸 🌼 🌻 Jac: my sentiments exactly 😄😄 Jac: I don't think Amelia will wear one Jac: but we can get them Jac: we can get our birth flowers and favourites and it'll be so cute Savannah: It should be an us thing, the holiday is so far away Jac: ^^ and it's more our vibe Jac: doesn't go with a short dress or jeans, really Savannah: 😄 Jac: I've got some books I need to return to the library, do you wanna meet at that little coffee place by there? Savannah: how many books? If you need help carrying them all I'll meet you at the library Jac: love the romcom fantasy 😅 Jac: you know me, there's a few... 😬 Savannah: 😊 I'll be right there, baby Savannah: no more struggles today Jac: ❤❤✨ Savannah: 🥰