#i mean its not like i have to drive or anything
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Some TimeBomb Analysis I felt was very heartbreakingly necessary in this trying time:
Ekko comes to realise by being in this world that Jinx was always Powder, in the same way that Vi comes to reconcile the two 'versions' of her, Ekko sees all the ways Jinx's savvy-ness and cunning and brains were always Powder. He gave her up for dead - like his dream of a beautiful Zaun - a long time ago, and painted the mural to show it. But being here with Powder makes him realise he can still have this is he's willing to take her as she is now, flaws and all.
So we all know Ekko is really talking about Jinx in the line "I used to dream the undercity could be like this", but I also think the opposite is true for his last line: "Can we pretend like it's the first time?" is about the kiss, but it's also about this version of reality. It's about Benzo being alive and Powder being Powder. It's about stepping back from his real world for a second to pretend that this is his real world. He was always going to go back, but just like his use of the Z-drive means that he could theoretically re-do and undo all of his mistakes ad infinitum, this is an acknowledgement that this 'redo' is how he wished it has been, and that it isn't real for him at the same time. Because it isn't the final time he will pull the plunger and reset. But he wishes that it was.
3. Jinx has a very difficult relationship with abandonment, obviously. But these lines encapsulate her journey towards accepting that no, actually, the people who love her will always refuse to give her up no matter how much she believes doing so would save them (including Silco and Isha and even Vander since the enforcers come after the kids for the stones she steals.) Never giving up on her empowers both Ekko and Vi in the final hours of the show. Their relationships with Jinx and the strength of that connection in the fullness and acceptance of all of its flaws and history means that they can do and achieve anything. Not giving up on her means not giving up even when everything falls apart around them. It's the crux of Ekko's time travel ability - he will always remember what really happened in all of those loops, he still carries those scars and physical damage, but he keeps trying anyways and that is what saves the world.
4. Jinx is the 'someone worth building for.' Yes, this line is about TimeBomb but it's also very strictly about Jinx. It's about Jinx needing to know that her life also have worth for herself. Her inventions have by and large been built for the sake of others - her toy weapons to impress the others/keep up with them, the canon for Silco. She rebuilds Sevika's arm because she wants to feel useful for someone again. But she doesn't value her own input into the world for her own sake. Ekko isn't asking her to fix the world here, or to make good on her mistakes. There is no 'fixing' or 'undoing' or even 'rewriting' the way Vi wants her too, the way the Zaunites do with her legacy. There is only something new. And her life is worthy purely for whatever creations she adds to the world, regardless of whether they can undo the past. There's something so achy about that coming from the Boy Saviour. He isn't really here to save Jinx from herself - he just wants her to know she can do that saving on her own.
5. Jinx always knew what she needed to do to break the cycle. But she grew up with too many people who never wanted to let go of the past. In the end, we see her airship fly not towards Piltover (in some desperate rewrite of her failed story in Zaun) but away from it. She gets out, she pursues something new, the image loops but moves towards a new trajectory with a different (better) ending, just like Ekko shows her is possible with the Z-drive.
Two sides of the same coin. She leaves Zaun to see something new, and he returns to Zaun to see it in all of its fullness. I think they'll be alright.
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Leaving it all Behind (LIAB)
It the simple things that keep me going— Max verstappen x reader
Word count —
Fluff— 798
In the years following their escape from the shadows of Max’s past, Max and Y/N’s life settled into a steady rhythm. Each day was filled with little routines that, to anyone else, might seem ordinary but, for them, felt extraordinary—a hard-won peace that neither of them took for granted.
After dropping the kids off at school one crisp autumn morning, Max walked back to the house, where Y/N was waiting on the porch, cradling a warm mug of coffee. She smiled as he approached, and he felt his heart warm, just as it always did when he saw her, as if the months together hadn’t dulled the spark between them but deepened it.
He joined her on the porch, accepting the cup she handed him. They sat in companionable silence, watching the leaves fall around them, the trees lining their quiet street painted in vibrant reds and yellows. Max looked at her, taking in the way the sunlight caught in her hair, her peaceful expression. After so many years spent guarding his heart and soul, loving her felt like breathing—effortless, grounding.
After a while, Y/N broke the silence. “Do you ever miss it?” she asked, glancing at him with a knowing smile. She didn’t mean the violence, of course. It was the thrill, the edge that had once been his life.
Max chuckled softly, setting his cup down and turning toward her. “Not a bit,” he replied, and it was the truth. “There was a time I thought that life was all I had. But now?” He reached over, lacing his fingers with hers. “I can’t imagine anything more thrilling than this.”
The days stretched into a gentle routine, and as Max grew his small garage business, he found a different kind of pride in his work. He no longer fixed cars out of necessity or as a front; he did it because he loved it. The regulars knew him by name, the locals treated him like a friend, and he felt—finally—like he belonged somewhere.
One night, after the kids were tucked into bed, Max and Y/N found themselves alone in the quiet warmth of their living room. The house was filled with the smell of apple-scented candles, and soft music played from an old radio in the corner. They danced slowly, swaying together in the dim light, moving in sync with an ease born from years of understanding.
Max rested his chin on the top of Y/N’s head, his arms wrapped around her waist, their movements unhurried. “Thank you for sticking by me,” he murmured, his voice soft. “For believing I could be more than what I was.”
Y/N looked up at him, her eyes filled with warmth. “Max, you were always more. You just had to see it for yourself.”
They stayed like that for a long while, simply holding each other, their breaths in harmony. Max knew they’d faced battles, they’d both endured scars, and though life would have its difficulties, they would face them together, hand in hand.
Sunday afternoons became family days—a tradition they’d started soon after settling down. They’d pack a picnic, drive out to the countryside, and spend the day outdoors. Max would chase the kids through fields of wildflowers, their laughter echoing across the open landscape, while Y/N watched with a smile that was equal parts amusement and love.
One sunny afternoon, as Max helped their youngest, a toddler with Max’s own dark hair and Y/N’s bright eyes, try to climb up a small hill, he heard Y/N call from the blanket where she was laying out lunch.
“Max! You’re supposed to help him, not hold him back!” she laughed, teasing him.
Max grinned, his gaze flickering between his wife and their son. “Hey, he’s gotta earn it, just like his dad did,” he said, giving her a wink before lifting their son up and twirling him in the air, the boy’s laughter filling the air.
They’d sit down to eat together, Max leaning back on his hands, watching his family with a contentment he couldn’t have imagined in his old life. Every laugh, every small moment they shared, felt like a promise kept.
Y/N reached over, touching his hand gently. “Look at us,” she said, her voice barely above a whisper. “We made it, Max.”
Max nodded, his thumb brushing over her knuckles. “Yeah. And we’re not looking back.”
As the sun began to set, casting golden light over the fields, Max took one last look at his family, grateful beyond words. They had fought hard for this life, and he would protect it with everything he had. For the first time, he felt he could truly leave the past behind, ready to embrace the future they’d built together.
#f1#f1 x reader#formula one x reader#formula one imagine#formula one x you#f1 x y/n#formula one x oc#formula one x y/n#max verstappen#max verstappen x reader#max verstappen x you#max verstappen x female reader#max verstappen fanfic#max verstappen fluff#max verstappen one shot
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・❥・ Headcanon time ・❥・
╰┈➤ Here’s only a few headcanons I’ve made throughout my whole ego phase [my life basically]. Some that I have are already pretty popular amongst the community, so that must mean I’m doing something right!!!
.·:*¨༺╔══ஓ๑♡๑ஓ══╗༻¨*:·.
╭┄┄┄┄┄┄┄╯
・❥・ Wilford Headcanons
╰┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄╮
•⌇⌦ Can shift fragments of reality intentionally and unintentionally [he can’t necessarily manipulate all of reality itself. But he is aware of his existence and its purpose - he knows he is a character meant to play in a story and he simply goes along with it, all while manipulating and shifting the story in some ways.] His reality shifting power is similar to Wanda’s [marvel] reality manipulating powers in a way, though watered down. He can sneeze confetti, take out balloons out of thin air, spawn bubbles in his hands, teleport, and defy the laws of physics.
•⌇⌦ With his reality shifting abilities, he can turn into AU [alternate universe] versions of himself. Maybe there’s a universe where he’s a cartoon? Chibi? Horror eldritch creature? He can turn into those versions of himself in the physical world whenever he wants! The laws of those universes will then apply to the world he is in [such as onomatopoeia words appearing in physical text midair.]
•⌇⌦ He is easily distracted and can never sit still. He always tries to actively distract himself from the darker parts of his mind.
•⌇⌦ His body ‘desaturates’ similar to pinkie pie from my little pony whenever he is in a ‘dull mood’ or when someone drives him to the point of being sad.
•⌇⌦ He loves stickers a lot, he can never stop collecting them. Mischievously, he also likes to splash glitter onto anything he deems necessary [to torture people to clean it up, but he claims that it’s just to ‘liven things up’ a bit.]
•⌇⌦ Too much creamer in coffee kind of guy [“Can I have coffee with my vanilla creamer please?”]
•⌇⌦ Constantly eats and smells like fruit candies.
╰───────────
.·:*¨༺╔══ஓ๑♡๑ஓ══╗༻¨*:·.
╭┄┄┄┄┄┄┄╯
・❥・ Dark Headcanons
╰┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄┄╮
•⌇⌦ More monster than human. [Yes, Dark is all the mansion, Celine, and Damien in one walking corpse. However, overtime, as Damien fell into the role of the villain, he may have embraced it a bit much. He still cares about his sister very dearly… so much so that he made sure she’s in a permanent sleep. Celine, even in her sleep, knows about this, and parts of herself influences Damien - thus influencing Dark as a whole. He is completely merciless, sadistic, manipulative, and couldn’t care less about the consequences of his actions as long as it benefits himself and his plan. Besides, he is immensely powerful, so if he is met with his consequences, he simply destroys them.
•⌇⌦ He is also very aware he is nothing more than a character, but, he knows he’s much more than this. Because he knows he’s a character, you often see him staring at the fourth wall but never necessarily addressing it [unlike Wilford.]
•⌇⌦ Can read minds and telepathically speak to people, conceal his presence, move through shadows, mimic voices, shift shadows and blend into them, and can turn himself into a Raven. Ravens hold a lot of symbolism, but for Dark specifically, The Raven means ‘Death, bad omen, bringer of chaos, transformation & metamorphosis, and the duality of existence’. He often stalks, observes, and travels within this form of himself.
•⌇⌦ Camera’s, no matter what kind, CANNOT pick up him as a whole. Whenever a picture is taken, a video, or anything of that sort is taken of him, he will always appear as a sporadic blur of blue, red, and black. He can never be caught on any footage.
•⌇⌦ Whenever he is present in a room, depending on his mood, the ringing sound that emits from him can completely shatter ANY kind of surface. Glass, wood, stone, etc. His surroundings also turn a bit desaturated/monotone whenever he’s around.
•⌇⌦ EXTREMELY tall, eerily tall, to the point it is very obviously inhuman.
•⌇⌦ Can take form of people’s fears and/or desires [used for manipulation tactics.]
•⌇⌦ Loves being praised for any reason. In fact, he could get distracted by it… likely because he’s slightly egotistical.
•⌇⌦ His body, to the touch, is always ice cold. Just being around him gives off cold chills and makes rooms colder.
•⌇⌦ Neck twitches constantly.
•⌇⌦ He’s highly patient.
•⌇⌦ Smells like smoke and old candles.
•⌇⌦ He is constantly tired, yet he never sleeps.
•⌇⌦ He can be referred to as Damien only by Wilford as he knows it’s a comfort for Wilford rather than anything else.
•⌇⌦ Dark wisps, like smoke, often emits from his hair and leaves a feint trail wherever he walks.
╰───────────
.·:*¨༺╔══ஓ๑♡๑ஓ══╗༻¨*:·.
・❥・ Bonus Short-Story ・❥・
.·:*¨༺╔══ஓ๑♡๑ஓ══╗༻¨*:·.
A fuchsia haired man sat on a weathered wooden bench, the crisp autumn air swirling around him, carrying with it the scent of fallen leaves and the hint of change. The trees stood tall and dark, their skeletal branches reaching out like gnarled fingers against the dark sky. Beneath the rolling clouds of black was a light shower of cold rain, paired with occasional deep bellows of thunder. Wilford, unbothered by the weather, wore a bright yellow coat that bore a striking contrast to the muted colors of the dark day, yet he felt oddly muted himself, as if the world around him had absorbed all the vibrancy he once possessed just moments ago. He stared at the trees, his curled mustache twitching as he was lost in thought. The shadows cast by the branches danced around him, triggering a flood of memories that flickered in his mind like fading autumn light. This time of year always made him contemplative how everything seemed to prepare for a long slumber, how decay and beauty coexisted in a delicate balance. Just as a gust of wind dragged him out of his thoughts and rippled up his spine, a dark figure swooped down from the sky. It landed gracefully next to him, perching on the back of the bench; its form a sleek raven whose feathers shimmered black as the void. The raven’s eyes glowed with an otherworldly stygian energy, deep pools of darkness that could drag anything into them.
Wilford turned to the raven, raising an eyebrow. “Well, aren’t you a striking little creature?” he quipped, a grin tugging at his lips. “What brings you to my little corner of the world? Here to steal my bread?” The raven tilted its head, regarding him with an unsettling calm, remaining silent but observant. Fragments of its being would fall out of place and come back together, as if reality itself fought against the creatures existence. Wilford leaned back against the bench, hearing it creak from his weight while his expression shifted. “You know, I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the roles we play, the expectations we uphold… it’s exhausting.” He glanced at the raven, as if seeking validation. “Sometimes I wonder if I’m still just a part of the show. One of the many characters in this unending, chaotic play. Am I the hero, the jester, or maybe even the villain? It’s hard to tell when the lines blur! As if I would use any scripted lines… but you know what I mean.” The raven hopped a bit closer, its gaze cold. Wilford felt a familiar chill run through him from the stare. “And then there’s the bigger picture. All those choices we make, the paths we tread. Are they truly ours? Or are we really just puppets on strings, guided by forces beyond our understanding? It’s like we’re all just fragments of a larger story, one even I can never understand, lost in a labyrinth of our own making.”
The raven remained silent, but its intensity seemed to deepen, as if it understood. Wilford sighed, running a hand through his hair. “I guess what I’m really trying to say is… I’m not sure where I fit into all of this. Sometimes I want to scream, to break free from agonizing expectation. But then I think—what if in doing so, I lose everything that makes me… me? Do I even have the power to break this? If I do, what would happen?” He would ask, hoping for an answer. With a rustle of feathers, the raven leaned in slightly, almost as if offering comfort. “You will never know until you try, William. Every great discovery begins with a leap of faith.” The raven spoke without its beak moving an inch. The raven studied the man in the yellow coat for a moment longer, and then, with a powerful flap, it took to the air, soaring high above the trees. As it ascended, Wilford felt an odd sense of clarity settle over him. He smiled softly to himself, the weight of the world feeling a little lighter as he returned his gaze to the autumn trees. In the depths of uncertainty, there was hope. A chance to steer his path towards an unforeseeable future. And it was all only a leap of faith away.
.·:*¨༺╔══ஓ๑♡๑ஓ══╗༻¨*:·.
・❥Thank you for reading! If you wish to see more, request some ideas. What are you curious about the most?❥・
#character art#small artist#digital art#digital illustration#artists on tumblr#artwork#darkiplier#fan art#markiplier#markiplier egos#wilford warfstache headcanons#wilford warfstache#markiplier warfstache#darkiplier headcanons#markiplier wilford#markipler egos#egos#youtuber egos#digital artist#original art#concept art#my art#character illustration#short story#story#storytelling#original story#fanfic#writing#wkm
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♡ START OVER AGAIN — HAE-JO / CHAE SEUNGHYEOK
hae-jo x fem!reader | wc : 0.8k words | content : possible grammar and spelling mistakes, lowercase intended, exes to lovers, swearing, hurt/comfort, mild angst | request : heyy!! i wanted to ask you, have you watched mr. plankton? and if so, can you write something on woo do hwan in it? i don’t mind if its angst or sad or anything!!
“you’ve got to be fucking kidding me.”
you cursed lowly, breath hitching in your chest as your gaze met the pretty brown eyes of the man who dumped you after almost five years of dating.
hae-jo’s eyes widened as they fell on you, not having expected in a million years that you were the bride he was commissioned to kidnap from your own wedding.
you cursed your sister in your head, knowing she was the one who insisted on handling everything, assuring you she’d get you out of marrying a guy your father had chosen for you.
“are you just gonna stand there?” hae-jo tried to remain nonchalant, not wanting to show that the sight of you in a beautiful wedding dress was doing things to his heart, even though it had been three years since you guys broke up. “or are you going to get inside the car?”
i’ll just get in the car and get away from the wedding. you told yourself, trying not to focus on the fact that your ex-boyfriend was the one assisting you in running away from your own wedding. i’ll figure the rest out later.
you got into his car, the blue jeep you were overly familiar with, without another word, clicking the seatbelt into place as you closed your eyes momentarily.
hae-jo kept glancing at you as he drove away from the wedding venue, unable to tear his gaze away. how was it that you still looked so beautiful even after three years? the drive was a long one, and he wondered if he should make conversation.
“you look beautiful, y/n.” he confessed softly, the words tumbling out of his mouth before he could stop himself. “it’s a shame you won’t get married in that dress.”
you sighed quietly, your mind whirling with various thoughts. one moment he was nonchalant, and the next moment he was soft — it never failed to give you whiplash.
hae-jo knew why you were quiet, yet he still couldn’t stop himself from asking the questions that entered his mind. ���why are you running away from your own wedding? i heard the guy’s rich. is he not your type?” he blabbered, his gaze shifting between you and the road.
“i’m not gonna marry some guy just because he’s rich, hae-jo.” the way you said his name was enough of an indication that he messed up. “i’m not some gold digger.”
“no, no. i didn’t mean it like that.” hae-jo intervened quickly, wincing as he realized you misunderstood him. “you know i didn’t, y/n. i know you aren’t like that. i just … i don’t know. i thought you’d have settled down by now. that’s all.”
you sighed softly, looking out of the window. “the guy i wanted to settle down with dumped me. what was i supposed to do then?” you blurted, never the one to keep your thoughts to yourself.
it was one of hae-jo's favorite traits about you; your honest bluntness.
“seriously? you never moved on? is that what you are saying?” hae-jo found himself stopping the car on the side of the road once they were far enough, turning to look at you. “you deserved better, y/n. you deserved better than me.”
“i didn’t want better, hae-jo.” you met his gaze hesitantly, your heart beating faster when you looked into his eyes. “i wanted you.”
hae-jo felt like the air was knocked out of his lungs at your blunt confession. he couldn’t help but resonate with your words, feeling the same. he hadn’t moved on either, stuck on you even if it had been years since you two had broken up.
“do you, uh…” hae-jo spoke up quietly, averting his gaze from her nervously. “do you still, maybe perhaps, want me?”
you froze, blinking. you hadn’t heard him properly, right? there was no way that he was going to ask you to get back with him, right? you couldn’t help but feel a little bit excited, although you also felt a bit frustrated — after all, he was the one who left first.
you stared at him for a few moments. “do you really mean that?” you responded, your voice wavering slightly.
hae-jo contemplated his words before he nodded. it was a lot to think about, but as he saw you, no problem seemed too big to overcome. he knew he could get through anything if he had you by his side.
“yeah, i do. i want to start over again. with you.” he uttered with a soft yet confident smile. “what say, shall we start over again, y/n?”
you met his gaze, smiling as you listened to his words. starting over again. that sounded nice. as messy as it was, you figured that running away from your wedding day just to get back together with your ex-boyfriend might just be the change you needed in your life.
“i’d like that very much, hae-jo. i’d like to start over again too. with you.”
#[📝] works#mr plankton#mr plankton imagines#mr plankton scenarios#mr plankton x reader#mr plankton haejo#haejo imagines#haejo scenarios#hae jo imagines#haejo x reader#hae jo x reader#hae jo scenarios#mr plankton drabbles#hae jo#haejo#mr plankton kdrama#chae seunghyeok#hae jo drabbles#chae seung hyeok
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I think one thing I originally missed is that the rune was specific. It was Ekko seeing Jayce wearing that specific rune that allowed for the creation of the Z-Drive and thus allowed for a spark of Viktor’s humanity to return which meant he could be swayed by Jayce.
So, whenever this particular sequence of events has happened previously for God Viktor, Ekko never had the Acceleration Rune which meant he never returned to be The Cog in the Machine.
I'm still, however, baffled by the audacity to imply that Viktor should've just rolled over and died of like Cancer or w/e. What do you mean?! What a screwed up message to send. It's ok to let the rich get richer, but God Forbid you want to cure cancer! How very US healthcare system of you.
And it's so hard to see between the lines when it comes to the hexcore because they waffled/altered Viktor’s character motivation. If you follow the throughline of season 1 Viktor, it seems obvious that Viktor was manipulated. However, because they literally retconned Viktor into always having been a quiet megalomanaical eugenicist...the hexcore was just a means to an end for Viktor.
Or is it both...or neither?
They could've easily had non-manipulated Villain Viktor without retconning, if they'd just stuck with the idea that he was more or less driven mad by the realization of not only his own overwhelming power, but of the world's suffering. We know Herald Viktor can sense and know the thoughts of Everyone In The World, why didn't you just do more with that?
Even when discussing Jayce's betrayals spiraling into a choice to give up humanity, it still seems like it comes from a place of the Arcane manipulating the events taking place to get Viktor to this point of villainy...but...I guess no?
I think Sky was real? Because she lowkey sounds bitter af when she tells Viktor he won't miss her. But if she was real, why was she so chill with what was happening? His choices led to her true death essentially...so why didn't she fight harder? If she represented his humanity as per the writers, why didn't she do anything to convince him not to lose himself?
Idk about her notebook. It doesn't seem to matter 😅.
I'm lowkey contemplating whether or not it's implied that Viktor Is The Arcane. That he's its literal personification now, or maybe he always was.
Because The Arcane chose Viktor and Viktor chose Jayce. In Act 1 Season 1, even when it appears that Jayce is being compelled by the Arcane to stabilize it, it's God Viktor’s movements he recalls/copies. In 1x5, it's Viktor that's given the vision of the hexcore. It's Viktor that the hexcore/Arcane reacts to. It's Viktor who is performing miracles via its power. It's Viktor that it acts and speaks through. But then...suddenly, these choices were always meant to be his own? Meaning it was always Viktor’s power?
Hell, I need to double check but when the Black Rose tells Mel "The Arcane is Waking Up" isn't Viktor Literally going through his final form transformation and thus waking into what's essentially Godhood (hence why I call him God Viktor)?
And hell, I've seen people be like "Mel is a born Mage and Viktor is an Artificial one." Which...isn't really true?
Viktor is Fated to be a Mage. It's his Destiny. You don't use Messianic imagery and give a guy the face of the Biblical Trinity and call his followers/creations Angels if he's at best a Fake.
Based on God Viktor’s lines we can gather that he Always brings on the Apocalypse. He always comes into contact with the Arcane with or without Jayce. Because he is Chosen. It's God Viktor that has solved all problems in the universe searching for the path where he doesn't end it all that has him stumble onto Jayce. And even in the timelines and universes where Jayce Fails, it's Jayce that stays with him and calls to his compassion. Therefore, he tries over and over and over to turn Jayce into his savior because he seems to be the only person who cared about him.
Which is screwed up when you consider it still takes Ekko giving them a moment that stops Jayce from fucking everything up anyways 🤣.
Spoilers, spoilers, spoilers
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"There must be some part of you still in there."
Stuck on this line because WHAT DO YOU MEAN?!
Why are you talking to him AFTER SHOOTING HIM?!
Why didn't you do that BEFORE SHOOTING HIM?!
I'm at a loss.
Was future/outside of time/god!Viktor just like playing a little joke on his past self by having Jayce shoot him?!
#arcane spoilers#jayce talis#viktor arcane#I'm in the mindset of taking moments right now#and leaving the rest behind#arcane season 2#arcane#but this was a ramble#apologies 😅#spoilers
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days where i have nothing to do: ohhhh im so sleepy im so so tired no one is more eepy than me
nights where i have to wake up at a set time: I Have Never Been More Awake In My Life
#help my eyes keep drifting back open#im trying all my tricks#cozy couch setup. whale shark plush to cling to. low lights. wendigoon iceberg in the bg. laughingstock imaginings in brain#IM WIDE TF AWAKE AND HAVE TO GET UP IN LESS THAN 7 HOURS#fuckfuckfuck did i pack my melatonin gummies already by mistake#i mean its not like i have to drive or anything#but id like to be... Aware. Available to converse with my dearest darling bestie#because i Am going to see my bestie!#absolutely unprompted#huh wait when was the last time i talked to a real life person in front of me. um.#its... been a couple weeks#NOT A MONTH YET THIS TIME! LESS THAN A MONTH!#but ohhhhh i am excited#tea with the homeslicebreadslice... joint Art creation....#BEING OUT IN THE WORLD AHAHA I WILL BE TEMPORARILY FREE#clawing at the walls let me OUT#gonna start biting this house i swear to god#i cant wait to be free of it. i hope it burns in the next big wildfire#OK WAIT NEW PLAN. i washed my mug and i have chamomile tea#i will drink some warm soothing tea uhhhhh maybe re-read a fic?#willing myself not to read stamps for the millionth time. im gonna read stamps for the millionth time#listen listen i love it and also im starving for fic#one day i will contribute but for now im poking ao3 with a stick begging it to do something#Soon though. i have a feeling. a strong psychic feeling.#Soon... something will Appear... i know this because my third eye is open#also i know because i know. OR DO I#im so tired yet so awake at the same time#someone whack me over the head with a cartoon mallet so that i may go to sleep with little birdies circling my head#wait shit those are vultures. IM NOT DEAD YET FUCK OFF#please i need to go snzzzzzz.... my alarm will be Going Off...
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thjat one post about going thru your entire life trying to avoid being yelled at❗❗❗❗
#talkys#i cant drive alone yet or hide an entire surgery from my parents which means if i want to look into#getting sterilized i have to discuss it with them and im scared bc i rly dont know what theyll say or do. lol.#theres also the fact that ive wanted this since i was a child but i knowww theyre going to make me feel like i shldnt do it#and ill start doubting it...not bc i dont want it but because welllll shouldnt I be saving moneyy...its not URGENT.....etc#im already talking myself out of it like ive been trained to. i dont want to be yelled at.#i dont need it i just want it. and not bad enough to be yelled at#i dont want anything bad enough to be yelled at.
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It's normal for teens to be attracted to other teens, hell it's normal for teens to find adults attractive, but I do think that like. The phenomenon I witnessed in the circles I saw here on tumblr and twitter where we had *Grown Men, Women, And Everyone in-Between Or Neither Or Otherwise*, people who are adults, constantly talking about how bad Castoria needed to get fucked or how much of a sex pervert she was ... I don't know how anyone can witness anyone talking like that about a teenager and not be like, WTF? It was fucked up because so much of LB6 is strictly about Castoria's trauma and neglect, how she only could rely on Ector, and how her supports have been ripped away from her, and how she's expected to do this grand act without a chance to live humanely or experience life or love... and people just wouldn't shut up about sex or petplay or fucking whatever. And she's like just a teenager. She's 16. But people kept acting like she had absolutely insane raging hormones, and projecting their own sexuality onto her, and the shit ppl wrote and drew was like... bro is she not like in dire need of some happiness that doesn't assume sex fixes everything about her? Or rather, do you idiots really think sex just cures you and everything you ever went through? Is sex the end goal of happiness for yall? It just felt demented as fuck. Like, who cares? But also why is it any of their business?
That's what drives me nuts and people talk about it seriously when it's like, American media, like I read conversations discussing how weird it is that tv runners and filmmakers love hyperfocusing in on teenage sexuality & sexualizing teenagers, how burdensome that for teens they can't enjoy media meant for their age group without *somebody* joyfully writing or trying to depict how much Sex they're having or how Sexy they are... I'm not even asexual, I just think this is a patriarchal problem that a ton of people just decided didn't matter anymore. Like it's ok to sexualize teen girls because they're teenagers. And if they're anime it's doubly okay because otaku don't care about that stuff. "Buh its Fikshon. Its make believe its pretend" type excuses made by people who think you don't passively absorb messages about how you should be acting, how you should talk, or look, or behave, depending on the positive connotation and depiction of anything in media. Like we're already aware we are slaves to advertising. Im getting ahead of myself here so let me like recap my thoughts:
- I think a ton of adults have this assumption that fictionality means 1) No teens will see it and internalize Sex = Value, 2) No adults will internalize that it's ok to treat teens like this and start behaving strangely towards teenagers
- "oh well then we should never depict teenage sexuality" How about this: Teenage sexuality has rarely been depicted with the dignity that allows teens to process real emotions about it rather than simply existing as spectacle and entertainment for pedophilic, boundary-lacking, disrespectful adults. And teens know this.
- Castoria is just so blatantly a little girl that needs like guidance and support and real ways of treating her like a person first that when I see people jump to speculating her sex life or talk about fulfilling her through sex I just want to strangle them. It is mostly adults that I have witnessed doing this and very rarely teens.
- I don't trust these adults because I think they have implicit bias directed towards being disrespectful of the boundary between adults and teenagers, they likely don't understand that that boundary is about respect, it's about treating those younger and less experienced than you with dignity and not forcing expectations onto them, they don't understand that negating that boundary is predation. A teenager is not your emotional equal. Or rather, they shouldn't be -- and if they are, and you're an adult, you need to understand your own maturity being on par with a teenager's doesn't mean you have the right to make adult expectations of a teenager. & I think that last bit as a principle applies to Many, Many things, not just sexual abuse dynamics
- I think if people try to strawman and say "well we can never talk about sex ed then" are also stupid because any sex educator will tell you there are clear cut boundary respectful ways that you can advise minors on sex ed and health that are able to answer their questions Without being disrespectful towards the minors involved or prying or treating them as equals to you.
- The older I get the more I realize the sheer and utter gap between a 16-17 yo and Any person above like. TWENTY years old and I start getting angrier and angrier the more instances I see of people talking about teens, fictional teens, teenagers in media, ETC. like they're sex symbols instead of like. Just. Kids. They're kids. They are literally kids that are growing up. My god. You do not really start to understand until you hit like 25 on average, I think, how absolutely batshit insane it is for ppl to be fantasizing about teenagers. & Quite frankly. I find it all starkly antifeminist and properly aligned with fascist ideals to be obsessed with this kind of thing as a virtue of sexual ""liberation"" or whatever people are saying these days. What exactly is liberatory about this and who does it benefit? In what way? What kind of ideas and power does this align with in our current political climate?
Asides from her being 16 years old it does make me insane when people talk about how bad they wanna fuck Castoria or how bad they need her to get fucked or something. I think these people are just straight up deranged. Maybe its bc I have kids but like theres noooo fucking way anyone who looks at Castoria and is fantasizing about anything sexual wrt her isn't a predator in some way bc how the fuck do you look at a sheltered, emotionally neglected 16 yr old like that and start immediately thinking about sex. She should be doing a nature walk field study and like playing basketball with her friends and going to hot topic not doing whatever the hell these weirdos think she should be doing lmfao
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oo u want 2 draw soo bad..
#i hate that my ability to draw is so conditional#its soo frustrating but i dont know how to break it. this has been the one thing thats never changed.ill never be free#times like rn i just do studies but its soo fking BORINGGG euuhh...#but if i try 2 draw something for funsies i just stare at the blank canvas. literally immobile. & u know how people r like just draw#something anyways. a line. something. and its like no i cant do that oi cant even do that u underestimate my freak#i want 2attack myself from the pov of someone else#i think im having the realization tht i will never be able to do art stuff frls and its driving me crazy i think.#like im actually sick and unwell frm the thought of it.my friend commissioned me and im ab 2 send the money back#after two weeks bc i cant do it im literally frozen dude.i want 2 cry and die and explode into a million pieces#wait im back to add more.idk if anyone feels the same way but its like. i know its entirely a Me issue its a mental block issue#theres something thats not connecting in my head but its like.why is it so easy for everyone else ykwim...and thats a lie too right#like everyone else struggles w art and its not.it cant exist Without you struggling and practicing hard and trusting yourself#but in my brain im just convinced that like.i cant do this i cant do this like everyone else can do it like second nature and it freaks me#tf out#but also its the one thing i want to do more than anything else in my life and so like if i cant do it i dont know what to do.ughh.#not me freaking the fuck out rn lawl.lols.even#and on top of it i feel like i cant express myself well and i think my friend. < SOOO awesome and well meaning and NICE and legitimately#pushing me to try and believe that i can do this stuff but i feel like they wont understand the sort of like.mental block im struggling wit#like its less that i hate my art or something i dont its more like.i just feel soo physically restrained and incapable of doing it.suddenly#i cant think and i cant do anything.i have no creativity i have no ideas my mind is quite literally blank and empty
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if i were to say that, hypothetically, i may have an idea for a multi-chapter agathario fic with some au expansions on certain scenes (specifically in episodes 4 and 5 *cough*), so many thousands of words of lowkey very filthy smut with needy, vulnerable yet bratty bottom!agatha and gentle, dominating possessive top!rio smut, AND extremely angsty flashbacks to agatha's backstory with her mother as well as rio with a lotttt of hurt/comfort... is that something that anyone at all would want to read perchance. hypothetically of course.
#this meme feels very Okay Sharks Here’s My Offer#and i mean it is tbh#anyway agathario nation are you hearing me#is this anything#i have SO MANY ideas#ive never really written a multi-chapter fic before i usually js do one shots and blurbs#but this story idea is genuinely writing itself in my brain i swear#like borderline against my will atp#its driving me nuts#ive never done a poll before teehee this is exciting#silas speaks#agatha all along#agathario#agatha harkness#agatha x rio#rio vidal#kathryn hahn#aubrey plaza#agathario fanfic#agathario fanfiction#mcu#marvel cinematic universe#agathario smut#agatha harkness smut#rio vidal smut#wlw smut
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What Deacon thinks: what did that mean? did he want me to wear a collar too? why else would he mention my neck? i mean, if he /asked/ me i would wear one but he didn't so would wearing one be weird?
What Ymber meant: It's nice to be near someone who isn't tethered to this world to serve it with a physical reminder for all to see.
#my characters#this just in ! thats why all the deities in the plot have collars and a chain !#its because THATS THEIR DESIGNATED I AM HERE TO HELP THIS WORLD SYMBOL#they cant remove their collars and thats fine by them - its a constant reminder that they exist to serve#deacon really shouldnt get as much crap as he gets in canon for being weird cause the deities are just a different brand of weird#like its not deacons fault that apparently you can say nice neck with no underlying desire#but he cant say hi would you please possess me i want to know what its like to have someone else in my body#like thats really not something you should pin on deacon YET EVERY deity is like wow what a lil weirdo#he also just really wants to please ymber so if ymber asked he would definitely do whatever#on the flip side i need to point out that deacon very specifically doesnt ask ymber for things nor does he pray for things#and it drives ymber up a wall because this is his favorite human who wont ask for anything and he isnt a psychic#he doesnt know what deacon wants or needs and its infuriating cause he exists to serve humanity#and yet this ONE GUY wont let him do things for him#this is very important and i cant believe i mentioned it like a month ago to someone and today#i received gift art of these two and i may never recover#its so perfect and its ymber just looming over deacon telling him that he can pray about anything to him#its also worth pointing out that when i was telling the person about the whole ymber begging for a prayer#its because he realizes that after all this time hes never had a single prayer from deacon - not before nor after the hire#so hes like oh well thats odd hmm#and then begins to talk to deacon like you know people pray to me for lots of things#and deacon looks at him unsure of what this is leading to - did someone offer a weird prayer? ask a weird thing? whatst?#and no - its just ymber saying that people will pray for wealth or an item#or they will express frustration if something is lost or broken despite it not being ymbers fault so deacon just stares#he has no idea what this is going to end on really so he points out 'well you do like to think you break people'#and ymber just ASDFASDFSADF STOP OK NEXT POINT people pray to me to bless relationships with happiness#and thats fascinating so deacon is like wow can you actually do that?#and ymber is so stressed as hes like i mean kinda i can simply amplify the positive emotions in gestures#like if someone gives an item out of love then its blessed#he also admits that he cant mask insincerity or malice so those feelings are not hidden nor amplified#and deacon just is impressed bc that is actually VERY cool
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if supernatural was any good, they would have had mary and lucifer sleep together in the apocalypse world. this would have solved zero problems with the show, but it would have created a hundred more interesting ones than they already had.
#they could have done this. for me.#it should have gone really well too. for mary and lucifer i mean.#because that would be 1000x worse for everyone else involved. if mary enjoyed herself and bonded with him.#doesn’t even have to be much of a bond but like. just enough that when sam and dean are there. it’s so incredibly uncomfortable.#sam like :) this is the second time my mother has slept with someone complicit in torturing me. i feel normal about this and its not#messing me up so bad im going to scream. this is fine.#dean would freak the fuck out about it though. openly and loudly. it’s *lucifer*.#which. of course. trying to tell mary that she’s not allowed to do what she’s already decided she’s doing because dean doesn’t want her to.#yeah. im sure that’ll go well.#lucifer doesn’t even have to do anything to drive a wedge between them besides sit there look pretty and eat mary out until she screams.#easiest job in the world#and most importantly: it would have been hot. literally just let someone walk in on mary pinning the devil himself to the floor.#why not give me this one thing huh
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oh no somebody I do not want to know about my online presence might have found this account luckily I didn't find anything suspicious in my follower list but oh my god
#nana talks#its literally my dad too I'm not gonna get into the whole lore of why I genuinely don't like him but he's an awful person#I hope nobody has to deal with somebody like that ever not even my worst enemy I'm not kidding#so like I'm hoping he's not stalking this blog#like literally what can he do not like its gonna drive me off of the platform I literally don't care about his opinion of me#but its still unsettling if he is trying to keep track of his adult daughter like this#anyways I don't know if I should reach out to tumblr support because like they probably can't do anything#literally up until I was like 15 he had stuff installed that would let him see everything I do online#eventually that app or something of his shut down and I was free hehe#like this man did and said the most horrendous things under the sun and he's like omg why does nana not want to spend time with him#I don't even care if he's reading this he knows that I don't like him#best thing you can do if you have someone like this in your life is just do whatever you want don't let them bother you that much#eventually they'll realise they can't bother you anymore#like literally for the longest while I thought he would never shut up with the insults directed towards me#but like a couple of months of not caring about it and not talking to him later and he left me alone#so like if anyone reading this can relate I am proof that it does get better my dad is the most stubborn and mean case too#so I promise you it will be okay
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post ankle-twisting clarity
#i slipped in the mudddddd the other day LOL i twisted my one ankle and scraped up my other knee#so the past few days ive just been kind of needing to waddle around.....#LUCKILY its healing well and fast <3 but yknow i was like#so stressed out over shit that doesnt matter in school. and like this is an awful unintentional habit i have but i will get like#overly stressed over shit and then i'll start getting SUPER careless with everything. and then i'll injure myself foolishly and Calm Down#happened last year with my foolish midnight woodcarving incident LOL its always november....#BUT yeah luckily this years foolish injury is a quick one at least!!#but yeah like genuinely i was so stressed out about all my fine arts major shit. teachers have been really getting on my case recently#my main professor said that it was a good thing people get so riled up with my work because it means its impactful#tbh i didnt believe her at all i thought she was just trying to placate me but then i listened closely to the things faculty say when#they look at my fucking. cartoon wolf drawing or something and i think. she might be right actually. people keep getting frustrated with me#because i think they see a lot of potential in me but i basically only have to drive to draw cartoon wolves etc HFKJSDHJVKRFEds#which is great for my ego. maybe too good for my ego. that my mark making and colour use etc is so evocative to these industry and#instutition people. but on the other hand i was told like thrice now that my work has no place in a gallery. which is fine although im not#totally sure how true that is. but also afterwards one time i was suggested to go into animation instead which is. um.#so its not out of nowhere i mean i did want to be an animator when i was like 10 but if you know anything about the current state of the#animation industry its like genuinely wild to tell someone who you've only seen 2 dimensional watercolour and acrylic painted#sketchy lined drawings from and who has said they cant do digital art anymore that they should get an animation degree?#brother they would kill me. i would be killed. i had an inkling but it really made me notice so clearly how limited the experiences my#faculty kind of have with certain industries. which is fine. or maybe not. for a professor LOL but yknow. but i was like huh. i guess i can#just kind of chill lol if i just keep doing things maybe something will come of it. i may not get as much help in my artistic development#rn as i would like. but its chill i think i'll figure it out if i just keep doing stuff <3#doesnt really matter that my teachers dont know what to do with me. my kneeeee has a booboo so i am CHILLING out :)
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not a comment on a r/fatuiHQ meme of all things making me finally notice that childe activating FL all the way back in the golden house cutscene actually summons those black hole/collapsing star imagery things (looking Exactly like the narwhal boss drop at a specific frame too) behind him if u look at it closely at the right frame😭😭😭
(peak subreddit btw.)
i mean its not Completely new for a motif his teleporting in the 4.2 opera cutscene is a much more clear example of the same exact visual effect but. Dang i never slowed the 1.1 cutscene down enough to see it for myself there before
what a cool detail and reccurring motif there! now let me lose my mind and credibility for a bit Thanks
(actual nonsense warning lmao its just cool black hole sfx but gone downhill)
(a Completely unrelated compilation here Surely. yes the narwhals spout attack thingy is less Obviously the same visual but its a pretty picture of my beloved. sue me. also its close enough 2 me)
anyway isnt it Curious how all these effects are ummmm black holes. like there are stars visibly collapsing here uwu. and black holes are. Collapsed dead stars. wouldnt it be funny if the narwhal boss drop archive entry somehow directly implies that the eye of maelstrom (a black hole) could simply be the echo of its prey. Which are. Yaknow. sometimes stars. for a cosmic whale. so an echo of its prey is an echo of a dead star. crazy ik. if anything like that existed i mean
oh JEEPERS. next thing youll tell me stars are archons forbid often used as a sort of allegory and very prevalent reference to some sort of an important category of people. like a descender or something. crazy ik (2: Electric boogaloo)
WHAT!!!! (and like 4 billion other examples i couldnt bother to gather and sc sorry)
and like. sure sure lets not get too crazy we need to remember skirks usage of this same power as well thats a good point. i should remain skeptical of my own insanity thats very true. we all get a sticker for responsible behavior UwU
so she indeed turned the narwhal into a black hole there yes. She Did That. so maybe its just the power from beyond thing. its void power its quantum but genshin. the black hole/collapsing star stuff is all surtalogis power okay lets consider that for arguments sake. well i guess that means its just surtalogis brand of transcendent abyss power and not about black holes slash dead stars that may or may not be dead descenders. thats fine
Whew i guess thats it then we solved it guys. okay i can accept that. its abyss power because surtalogi things and childe and the narwhal displaying it is all because of surtalogis plots and teachings and powers. something like that
and even if that may be a bit anticlimactic of a conclusion for a narwhalpilled truther like myself (with a penchant towards Theres Some Descender Shit Going On With Ajax antics as well) at the very least its good that there isnt any datamined book series in which some particularly pygmy-esque individuals Strangely fitting of our current descriptions and knowledge of of dain + the sinners band together to merk some guy from beyond teyvat with special powers that may or may not be the irminsul-proofed historical account of a particular descenders death so nothing like THAT can throw a wrench into our very confirmed conclusion of surtalogis power and by extension childe and maybe even the narwhals black hole motifs just being basic abyss element power that has absolutely Nothing to do with any descenders or... dead stars? yeah its a good thing nothing like that exists .
OH SH----
#NO I CANT MAKE IT MAKE SENSE IT JUST DRIVES ME INSANE. THESE THOUGHTS. I DONT HAVE A GOOD POINT OR ANYTHING IM JUST#DYING OVER THERE THANKS. HOLDS HEAD IN HANDS#BLACK HOLES.... WHY IS IT BLACK HOLES... COLLAPSING DEAD STARS..............................#(also as u might notice. thanks 2 catwithbluehat for yt genshin cutscene compilation for da screenshots o7)#anyway#even if i dont actually happen to have any particular point or theory to offer here. i just find it inch resting how this motif repeats .#strange. odd even. certainly scrumptious#like . Curious. whatever may they be implying. and like ultimately i just think its soooo funny#whyever would a Particular 14 yo awaken a whale that Happens to be drawn to eating Stars Specifically. like what is it abt Him there huh.#hey wouldnt it be EVEN funnier if that purple guy inside the narwhal. with a LITERAL black hole in his chest. that also transforms into.#that eye of the maelstorm there . during the battle. and protects the core of the narwhal in its stomach#was ever called like. idk an ancient nemesis or maybe just a shadow of such nemesis too. in an early beta or sth. for a TCG summon mby#like even more strongly suggesting the dark shadow = narwhals prey = a dead star = a....dead descender even??? jkjk for last part. (unless)#but the first 3... like if it ate its nemesis and the nemesis is thusly that echoed shadow of a prey..... hmmm how Curious#why would a whale that chases stars ... chase that guy too enough to eat him ............#(this is a jkjk unless way of being like. what if the dudes ajax but a past incarnation hehe. what if theyre soulmates like that. tee hee.)#(what if a dead descender has been reincarnating all this time like that . wouldnt that be quirky . also they should kiss)#(ignore me im dying inside.)#anyway . for real tho . idk what the fuck any of this Actually means it just lives rent free.#like idek what im trying to say with any of this shit qskjwajkwdjJKWJKWDJKWDJKD#also the photo quality w the yt scs is kinda ass but thats on me lmao.#rambles#genshin#childeposting#narwhalposting
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ah yes! the joys of executive dysfunction and something being Fundamentally Broken In Your Braincase!
#quick vent Look Away Nothing To See Here#i just needed to place my emotions somewhere before i really started to spiral#texts from cherished friends should not cause nausea-level anxiety! and yet!#here i am! running away from the ever-present miasma of guilt and stress!#you know a few months ago i was like 'im going to be better about responding im going to do better'#i Immediately started doing Worse!#i think i stressed myself out too much#pretty much every relationship i have ends up completely deteriorating due to my own insecurities and guilt and fucked up brain <3#ah yes and how could i forget the Commitment Issues and Emotional Block#mentally i am banging my head into a wall#but its fine Its Fine#i mean its not. its really not. but sometimes it seems like the harder i try the harder i fail#which is something i should be used to by now!#okay so it looks like i Am Indeed spiraling so#i am going to go... list some good things in this world and uhhh#well i dont have the car this weekend so cant go for a drive and some boba. um.#i need to organize my room table Yes that sounds distracting and falsely productive#not gonna tag this with anything actually.#love treating tumblr like my personal diary#ah yes its just me. my personal feelings. and the couple thousand people that follow me.#perhaps i will also buy something online with one of the gift cards i found the other day#buttons from michaels!!! i need buttons! i will go do that!#with the knowledge that i have unopened messages to respond to looming in the back of my mind like a noose! yippee yahoo!!!#gonna... turn of replies/rbs just this once since its just a Vent#i just needed to get it Out yk? not looking for anything other than relieving pressure on my brain#ok it looks like i cant turn of replies for individual posts#just... pretend you didnt see this for both our sakes <3#look away look away
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