#i mean every time it's hard
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Not me having a breakdown past midnight because I have to go back to work Monday and I don't want to.
#misc#what if the concept of working didn't exist uh?#joke aside#i hear older people close to retirement saying they don't want to work anymore#and im like that in my early 30s lmao#and i can't publicly that i don't want to work#cause it's not socially acceptable#but it's the truth#i haven't done shit to find any other job#because in all honesty#i feel no desire towards any work whatsoever#i don't care about discovering x or y#it's all shit#anyway#this just hit me randomly right now#my brain reminded me of that#i mean every time it's hard#it's hard when it's after a break week where i did absolutely nothing whatsoever and come back with guilt#but it's hard after travelling too#starting to think travelling is just the more expensive adult version of escapism#like i don't want to kill myself anymore#but i like to absolutely forget i have a shitty life anyway for a few days#and i had a good time#(well not this week I'm just sick for the whole week)#but i am hitting the wall of reality#and the guilt will come too cause yeah i haven't cleaned my shit#and i absolutely don't want to come back to work#but i haven't done shit to put myself out of this situation#cause this requires working somewhere else#short story long story there's no possible escape road
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231216 Metamorph Black Rose Fancam
#i think black rose choreo might be my favourite?? it's just sooo beautiful and statuesque#it's also so evocative imagery-wise. just the idea of blooming roses and the controlled movements blow my mind every time i see it#obviously it's taemin's execution of the dance too. i mean look at him he's so poised and gentle (especially the moment in this gifset)#and then the dance goes hard later on too ~chefs kiss~ it's the contrast that's beautiful- like all of taem's work#also this fancam is GORGEOUS the smoke and the layering of the dancer's hands through the mist is so picturesque. yall need to click the#link and watch the full thing. seriously.#ok im done talking too much hah š
š#taemin#lee taemin#shinee#shinee taemin#kpop#mygifs#speakofgifs#metamorph#black rose#analook
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Every day Iām haunted by the fact the boys happily swim in sewer water
Even if itās filtered somehow thereās no way itās not still nasty š Bet they can defeat any of their villains just by accidentally giving them diseases I swear
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#bless their hearts but theyāre nasty#itās funny because like#each and every one of them has moments#where theyāre a typical disgusting teenage boy#and then the next they have STANDARDS#canāt blame Leo for being so determined to go to a spa#even if he nearly licked his own foot thatās prob cleaner than anything else the boys have been up to in years š#thank you shelldon for all your hard work cleaning after then š#theyāre all gross teenage boys!!!#even Donnie he is NO exception here#bro was DRINKING A BEVERAGE while wading through sewer water he is just as gross as his bros#bro also talks with his mouth full he is no more refined than his equally gross bros fr and I love it#but yeah no way that water isnāt disgusting even filtering it would still leave grime on the walls of the sewer for yearsss#pros of them moving into an abandoned subway system is fixing their sense of smell enough to not be as gross#100% thatās part of why they didnāt mind being so filthy pre shelldon#because I mean they were literally raised in the sewers and theyāre teenage boys like thatās a double whammy#THEY ALSO DONT WEAR SHOES#the few times any of them do the shoes are discarded before heading home š#I love them tho they are endearing anyhow#Aprilās immune system must be godlike just being around them fr#honestly no joke Mikeyās probably the cleanest of them all#just by virtue of being a chef#Leo I see as a mixture since he no doubt loves to pamper himself so heās clean like#a percentage of time before he goes out and ruins his own hard work#Donnie is similar in that heās just VERY SELECTIVE about what he thinks is too gross#Raph may be more on the stinky end but itās not his fault he has his stinks and eats things of dubious origin(esp since his bros ate poison)#Donnie and Leo really have the gall to be sick about Raph eating the origami salami but they have no room to talk#all their villains are prob like please stay away from us we have salmonella now
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growing up with a perpetually anxious primary caregiver is such a mindfuck. that shit will rewire your nervous system
#not a shitpost#i get that parenthood and modern life in general is extremely anxiety inducing#and that anxiety is a common mental health issue and anxiety disorders exist and do not disqualify you from being a loving parent#but i am begging you PLEASE do not project your anxiety onto your kids#especially younger kids#your job is to make your kids feel safe and secure. that is a primary requirement#that doesn't mean you can't be anxious!#but just like being angry doesn't mean you're allowed to yell at your kids or slam doors or break things#being anxious doesn't mean you are allowed to surround your kids with your own fear and stress or teach them to share your anxieties#your job is to be a comforting nurturing parental figure. that means projecting comfort and love#even when it is hard! even when you are tired or angry or scared!#which is a damn hard job! and you won't get it right all the time!#but dammit babes you gotta TRY#kids deserve to feel safe and comfortable in their daily lives#you CANNOT be teaching them to expect catastrophe lurking around every corner
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Them: Do you miss QSMP?
Me:
[ Full Transcript ā ]
ā
Aimsey: I'm not effected by Minecraft, what are you on about? You're crazy. [Video cuts to Aimsey sitting in a corner screaming] Aimsey: You guys think a Mineā a block game is gonna make me sad? [Video cuts to Aimsey sitting in a corner screaming again] Aimsey: You're crazy! [Sniffles, holding back tears] No, you're craā no, you're crazy! You're crazy! [Sniffs] Anyway, umā [Laughs]
#QSMP#Aimsey#Appropriate since they were reacting to Purgatory stuff at the time#Edited#Subtitles#A bit different from my usual posts but it's one of those nights#š#This video is literally me in every sense except I'm dabbing my eyes with a bi pride flag#I know this is a HORRIBLE time to post clips but the emotions are really hitting rn#I mean I'm Always missing QSMP but everyone's really being hit by that feeling especially hard today it seems
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Cross has trouble getting to sleep alone in his room and goes looking for a distraction, but ends up finding a solution for both of them
#UTDR#UTMV#Cross Sans#Killer Sans#Kross ship#(Kinda. It's up to interpretation)#Long post#I'm so sorry I didn't mean for it to be THIS much#I started this like a week ago -A-#Lies down and lets out a long howl it's finisheeeeeed#I could have just drawn them spooning and written the rest but noooo I love to do things the hard way#Anyway I think they should be bed buddies#The company helps Cross relax enough to sleep and the touch helps knock Killer out#Cross has to be big spoon because otherwise Killer's soul gets squished and it's too uncomfortable to sleep#Also I realised Cross and Nightmare are the only two in the castle who didn't have knock knock jokes in their backstory#I like to imagine Nightmare has had similar confusing interactions with at least one of them#Cross probably spends the rest of the day panicked that he overstepped a boundary or the others will make fun of him#Not realising that Dust and Horror have fallen asleep together many times#Or that Killer hasn't slept properly in weeks and he's in heaven#I'm NOT drawing a follow up so just imagine Killer coming to Cross's room the next night and finding every excuse to stay#Because he wants it to happen again but he has no idea how to ask (and also Cross seems kinda awkward about it)#Absolutely terrified that I spent my whole week off working on this and it might be not that great so I hope at least one person likes this
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Incorrect, the fact that Biden has dropped out and a candidate with history of supporting medicare for all and being more receptive to a ceasefire in the I/P conflict has made me go from "I cannot morally support the Democratic nominee" to "I am voting for the Democratic nominee despite the fact she isn't perfect in every respect." I'm really happy this played out. The Dems for the most part abandoned the old Obama platform and it feels like its possible an actual progressive agenda could come to pass in my lifetime.
Kamala 2024!
If you weren't going to vote Democratic in this election before Biden dropped out you're a dorkass loser who does not care about any of the issues you're yammering about here and also a fundamentally bad person, and I hope you get run over by a bus.
But you got one thing right in all of this gibberish, Kamala 2024.
#personal#answered#anonymous#i mean let's be clear here no president is gonna attempt to be progressive ever again within my lifetime#because joe biden tried to do like 25% of that and got ZERO fucking credit#he did so much on healthcare on reform on loans on so many social issues and for all his litany of failings on i/p#he has been distinctly harsher on netanyahu than a good chunk of dems and certainly the entire republican party#for the first time since i was four we are not involved in any wars as americans and that is thanks to joe biden#but the thing is that he gets no credit for any of it!#him pulling out of afghanistan caused his approvals to tank in a way that never recovered#and leftists gave him FUCK ALL for it#they gave him nothing they just continued whining that even tho he cancelled a bajillion in student loans#he didn't actually cancel a QUADRILLION dollars so both parties are the same and voting is the most arduous task known to man#no democrat who is running is going to forget that catering to leftist/progressive policies gets them zero leeway with those supporters#that it not only tanks numbers but you still get constant haranguing about it anyway#so they're not gonna do it#we are gonna get fuckall for at least a good fifty years#and anything we get will be utterly in SPITE of people like you anon it will happen in spite of everything you've done#mostly because of people like me and mine who understand that voting is the bare minimum#and that for the democratic process to work the way you want it to you need to participate and not pitch a fucking fit#like a four year old who was told they can't go to disney this weekend#like i know you ratfuckers are happy this played out because this is all a game to you and you don't actually care#but that's why i've got zero faith in you people and why i'm glad it's my kind of folks#actual die hard democrats who have always been hardliners for supporting democrats in every possible election#who are picking up the slack and donating to harris and supporting her agenda#which is the exact same as biden's because she's his vice president and they share they same platform#because that's what they were both running on! twice!#anyway fuck you please feel free to find a necktie and test how tall your doorframe is
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i canāt stop thinking about creampies while cockwarming and how youād feel each pump when he unloads himself in you bc his cock is unmoving, itās just throbbing spilling filling
#ā ai rambles#this w satoru bc ik heās having a very hard time staying still#heās trying to shift every now and then just to get some friction#i mean any friction counts atp#the fact heās inside you counts#heās so miserable every time you cockwarm him yet he loves it so much#i donāt think he ever goes to bed without his cock inside you
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I met the me who made different choices
#idk what this means so dont ask#got the words stuck in my head and this is what I wanted to draw for it immediately#me at my desk. so.#I dont look exactly like this obviously. doesnt matter. anyways#hard time recently in a lot of different ways#lots of work to do!#given up on getting everything done I kind of failed at that. it was too much#so now I'm just trying to get anything done that will make the next 6 months not kill me again#ideally. 3 episodes. or the book#or like at least close enough to that that its basically that#I'm feeling really screwed LOL#I dont know how I've been working every day for so long and still havent done enough...#(its because the work load is way too much)#every time I take 1 hour for myself. to cook. or clean. or draw something else. or play a game. I feel so guilty auauau#I hate webtoon I hate this damn green app...#DOESNT MATTER!!!#what DOES matter is my art is good as hell... look at this shit...#the light. the colors. I love you red I love you green#I need to get more red pants I only have the one pair.#I saw this guy with red pants that had skeleton legs on them and I was like FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!!!!!!!!! I need them!!!!#I need to start sewing again. I dont have a sewing machine cause my apartment is too small so I havent sewn in years but I really want to..#I want to make clothes again... I need some vests I need some dresses..#I will not make pants or sleeved shirts because I dont hate myself#sketch#art#vent art I guess LMFAO its not#its just this fun little thing we like to call self expression#also this isnt how my desk setup actually is I scooted things around cause I didnt wanna draw anything twice. fuck it we ball#ok back to work
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I canāt do it
#I get that his chapters are important but good lord heās annoying#my eyes roll so hard every time we thinks something mean about noah#I donāt like you man I hope you get squashed in a sentient forest#trc#the raven cycle#barrington whelk#the raven boys#trb#blue sargent#noah czerny#ronan lynch#adam parrish#gansey
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i hope this goes without saying but āif you see something, say somethingā exists within fandom spaces too. and i donāt mean outright cyber bullying.
i mean when you read something in a fic that feels off- be it a certain stereotype used, or a slur, or the erasure/changing of a characterās racial/sexual/gender/cultural identity/disability in favor of one that takes away from the contentās diversity instead of adding to it or leaving it the same.
i mean when you see art of a character and theyāre very clearly much lighter in skin tone/have much more eurocentric features than the actual actor/character the art is based on, or a mobility aid they commonly use is never showcased when an artist draws them.
even if itās not āagainstā you and the marginalized group you belong to. even if the creator says they put a lot of effort into their product, and youāre sure they did. look out for marginalized fans. send a kind and curious dm to a creator asking about why they chose whichever stereotype you saw. let your questioning make them question themselves so they can learn from the error. reach out. itās not flaming or bashing fanwork- itās protecting underrepresented fans from encountering content or creators that donāt welcome them. it opens things up for wider conversation and research and correction and continuing.
if you read it, give it notes, comment- say something.
#this isnāt after one singular person. more like a series of encounters over this past year#i feel like i personally always try and jump on every thing when thereās an opportunity to open someoneās eyes a bit but man. its hard#to do it alone all the time#this is a call to arms! being kind doesnāt mean not saying anything when u think smth is bad itās speaking up to protect others.#fandom#newsies#bc iām in that one#musical theater#musicals#broadway#broadway musicals
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Okay, my brain refuses to think about anything other than Murderbot, so I looked at every use of the word "friend[s]" in TMBD and... created some pie charts. Normal human activities.
Some Thoughtsā¢ I had while putting this together (under the cut):
In All Systems Red, Murderbot notes that the PresAux crew are all close friends (twice! and goes on to explain their internal relationships which I think is very cute). This is pretty much the only use of 'friends' in ASR, except for when Murderbot says that SecUnits can't be friends with each other.
It seems that this may be one of the first times Murderbot has ever really been around a group of friends before? Murderbot notes that this is not the norm for its contracts and admits that the fact that they are all friends and the way they interact with each other make it actually enjoy that contract (before!!!! the hostile attack, so it already enjoys this contract before they start seeing it as a person etc ghghhhh). [Inference: Friendship seems enjoyable.]
The first character that calls Murderbot its friend is ART in Artificial Condition. Murderbot immediately refutes this (and then goes on to call ART its friend to its clients for the rest of the book). [Inference: Maybe ART is Murderbot's friend. And maybe that is... agreeable]
Rogue Protocol has more than twice as many instances of the word 'friend' as any of the other novellas. Why? Miki. Friendship and its implications for non-humans are a central theme because Miki is friends with everyone. Murderbot initially scoffs at the notion that Miki and Miki's humans are friends. At the end of the book, after witnessing how desperately Don Abene tried to stop Miki from trying to save them, and her grief after its death, Murderbot has to admit that she had in fact been Miki's friend. [Inference: Humans can be friends with bots and can sincerely care about them]
In Exit Strategy, Murderbot tentatively uses the word "friends" for its humans for the first time (several times actually). It questions whether it can actually call them its friends or not and later realizes that it had been afraid what admitting that the humans are its friends would do to it. At the end of the book, Mensah tells Murderbot the PresAux crew are its friends, which is the first time a human has directly said that to it (at least on-page). [Inference: Humans can and want to be Murderbot's friends]
In Network Effect, Murderbot seems to be more habituated to the word 'friend', confidently calling ART and Ratthi its friends, like it is no longer just trying the concept on unsure if it fits. There are many instances in which other characters refer to MB as ART's friend or the other way around and Murderbot's humans refer to Murderbot as their friend several times. Generally, there seems to be less hesitancy, because yes, all of them are Murderbot's friends, why wouldn't they be. [Inference: SecUnits can have friends. This SecUnit has friends. They care about it a lot.]
Conclusion: The Murderbot Diaries tell the story of a construct that does not seem to consider the possibility of friendship for itself and is fine with that - until it accidentally starts caring a little too much and suddenly more and more people annex it as a friend (ew) to the point where it can no longer deny that this is happening and has to begrudgingly admit that yes, it has friends now and maybe that is actually not a bad thing.
#the murderbot diaries#murderbot#šæ#hi i'm READY to write a thesis about murderbot i am having way too much fun with this#i created a pretty excel spreadsheet and everything#i don't know why i did this but now i can look at them while i think about this more! so i figured i'd share them haha#i didn't count uses of 'friendly' but special shoutout to when MB is all alone in its cold cubicle missing 20% of its body mass#and starts putting on a show because 'the friendly noise would keep it company' šš#i feel sick thinking about murderbot all alone on its own not knowing what its like to have friends watching media for 'the friendly noise'#also YES okay i wanted to make a point about miki there but i just#couldn't bring myself to talk about that more so... yeah#also uhhh this data is very subjective#i didn't count particularly ironic uses of 'friend' and generally did not count every instance of friend and sometimes it was a hard call#also i probably shouldn't have counted the times murderbot refered to drones or secsystems as its friends (often after hacking them)#but murderbot does seem to care about them and shows kindness and respect and sometimes points out that a system is friendly#so while i don't think MB means āfriendā in the same way referring to them as when it refers to ART for instance#i still think its CUTE and also kinda funny how many times that happened so i decided to keep those!!!#but yeah take my data with a grain of salt lol
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frenchie in every scene 1/??
bonus:
#ofmdedit#our flag means death#frenchie ofmd#joel fry#frenchie*#every time i see a flash of joel's canines i get so hard i pass out#originals
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evil win! the ones plotting for your mysterious death are uncle and nephew!
#persona 5#persona 4#goro akechi#tohru adachi#uncle Adachi au#this came from the idea of apophenia#which means connecting dots that arenāt there#every time I see these two in fanart I go āwow . Adachi is so uncle coded here. akechi is totally his nephew. everyone is thinkign thisā#false. my au has not reached enough eyes#so I just idk wanted to draw them next to each other to inspire further apophenia in both me and perhaps my followers lol#i was inspired by someone who like. literally just drew them beside each other and I was like. yeah i could do that#NO I COULDNT. NOT EASILY#my brain was like āyou should do a comic abt how Adachi canāt help but see his sister in akechi bc they look almost exactly the sameā#and there was a lot more angst in the arsenal as well#took me forever to just. draw this. like literally I thought I was gonna go insane#i cant. not. draw. a comic. or something with the vaguest of stories it is SO HARD idk why#so this was definitely a struggle. hope y all like it
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#dunno if this counts as a sniffer or a muncher so i'll tag both:#sniffer#muncher#and bonus#anime#under the cut#sandshrew#sandshrew is so cute. i got one billion of these guys every time the wild area thing or whatever it's called in pokƩmon XD alarm went off#wild area is gen 8 but. those of you who've played pokƩmon xd you know what i mean#i feel like i have a lot of thoughts on that game that have somewhat solidified over time as it's been a while since i played it and i've#had a lot of time to process my feelings about it#i'm not sure if i ever talked about them here but i think i mentioned having been playing it a while back#either way i think it's not as good as pokƩmon colosseum. that's the gist of my feelings#it has some things that are better that make it hard to go back to colosseum but i just like colosseum more despite all of its#lacking quality-of-life features that XD has
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okay but sarah celebrating tommy every year for motherās day
#who needs a mommy when you got a tommy#the first time shes does this its preschool teacher mariaās idea#shes four and mothers day is coming up and its usually a hard time for her so joel lets maria know just in case she has any behavioral issue#miss maria is like š«” i gotchu#she makes sure to emphasize to the kids that families are all different#they spend every day of may leading up to mother day reading books exploring diversity in families and talking about what mom really means#that it doesnt have to be the person who had you in their tummy or a girl or even a person we call mom#for example miss mariaās real mommy wasnt so nice growing up so miss marias TRUE mommy is just her daddy and her auntie rose#because those are the people that loved her no matter what and kept her safe and taken care of and fed#thats all mom is#it just means someone thats there for you every day and loves you and cares for you#someone who is one of your favorite people and who would say the same about you#all the kids go around and say who they think are their moms#mosy say some iteration of āmommyā and āmamaā or āgrammyā#but then baby ellie says ātess and auntie marleneā#and baby sarah says āuncle thommyā#one of the other littles says ādaddy and miss mariaā š#and they all make heart cards for their mommy firgures#they cant write or really read anything but a few letters yet#(even though hyperlexic baby sarah does have pretty incredible letter recognition for her age)#so they tell miss maria what to write on their cards and then decorate with oil pastels#sarahās says dear uncle tommy thank you for being my mommy you are so funny and i love when we play horsey and princesses. happy mommy day#when he picks her up at the end of the day shes like HI MOMMMMM all giggly and hes like ????? hi???? whats this???? OPEN IT OPEN IT OPEN IT#and when he does and read it he literally drops to his knees to hug her and cry#because theres really nothing more precious than his little angel his baby his best girl#thats tommys DAUGHTER DO YALL UNDERSTAND??????#miss maria watching them from the cubbies like: godDAMN theyre so cute#the next day tommy brings her a oat milk chai from her favorite coffee shop as a thank you because it meant a lot to him and shes like ????#how did u know???? and hes like my brother and you ran into each other there last week yeah? he told me abt it i asked for your order#and shes like š„¹š„°š« thanks
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