#i may need to write about my husband
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I never posted these pieces but I'm so big into Kid Flash, flash, DC, etc. Wally West, Wallace West, and Bart Allen (i love Barry too but he's not drawn here). I always really liked Wally's suit redesign with the new 52 and rebirth issues. Both of these pieces I made were done 09/18-09/20 alllll the way back in 2021. I ended up not posting them because after doing the 3 hour experiment of coloring Wally West, my husband, I showed it to some friends and they proceeded to tell me his feet were wrong (they are...) so I just gave up and never wanted to post it. đ¤Łđ¤Łđ¤Ł
The Sanrio x Flash was basically going to be a crowded mall as the bros hang out but I hate drawing crowds and gave up. Looking back, I actually learned a lot while working on this. I'm actually really proud of my 2021 self for attempting perspective.
Also just tossing in sketches cause I like showing off sketches. I specifically was referencing a lot of flash comics for the sketches so it's relevant.
Even though these were 3 years ago, I still remember learning a lot working on both of these. The Wally West running actually was the first instance of a coloring technique I still use to this day đ
Crazy to me these were exactly 3 years ago!
âĄ09/18/21⥠& âĄ09/20/21âĄ
â ď¸Disclaimer: I used to never sign my art. But I've recently noticed some of my old stuff being stolen from my Instagram/Twitter and uploaded to Pinterest. I've never posted any of my work to Pinterest so it's all been stolen. My friends have encouraged and reminded me to sign my stuff which is why my recent art usually will include a signature or water mark of some type. â ď¸
đ¨I've never once consented to my art being reposted or uploaded to anything that's not my accounts.đ¨
đ¨I do not consent, and never will, to my art being used to train AI.đ¨
#brainrot#fanart#sharing old art#old art#I'm actually still so proud of these#i may need to write about my husband#been in love with Wally West since the beginning#wally west#wallace west#bart allen#kid flash#dc impulse#the flash#dc fan#i like dc comics but don't like the movies#flash family#the flash family dynamic is my favorite#throwback Thursdays#do you guys want to see more of my old art#flash x Sanrio#hello kitty
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I am the reason that God no longer answers your prayers, for He fears what He created when I was born and I gained the ability to create and think. If I die neither Heaven nor Hell will accept my soul, for the atrocities I have committed with thoughts are too many to ignore, and my physical form shall remain, rotting with my essence and soul still inside. When this planet is destroyed, I will be the one behind it. When the Sun implodes, I will be in its center, shining just as bright with sin, a sin so damned and unholy the Universe it shall find difficult to behold, and I will laugh. Laugh as if nothing matters, because nothing will, for I have become too powerful, and the Devil himself trembles with my presence, as God and Heaven fall from grace and darken.
And at the center will be a single man, for he has forsaken me to this hell: Neil Gaiman.
#yes this is about season 2 of good omens#i need therapy#sorry if its edgy i write dark shit as a stim and MY GODS I NEEDED IT#anyways no i have not committed a crime its just i noticed there was a season 2 and i went to the fouth dimension and back in seconds#i was never this happy#normal tags now!!!#good omens#ineffable husbands#shitpost#writing#may god forgive me and have mercy on my soul because this paragraph is pure sin đ#i dont even believe in the christian god what am i doing here#edgy#sorry!!#and sorry to my moots who end up seeing this
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Imagine Simon's mom doesn't die with Tommy and Beth. Maybe she was out of town, or at a friend's house, and Roba's men were sloppy and missed her. Anyway, so it's just Simon and her now, and because he blames himself for what happened, he's pulled away from her.
He pays her rent, even if he wanted her to live in a nicer apartment complex. And he visits during her birthday and Mother's Day, and sometimes just randomly stops by. But he never stays very long, and he doesn't tell her a lot about his new life. It's a very one sided relationship, but she tries to make the best of it.
And then you move in next door, during one of Simon's deployments. You feel bad for the sweet lady that lives next to you. She never seems to have much company, and you take it upon yourself to befriend her, spending more time in her apartment than your own.
You learn about her ex husband, her sons, the tragedy, and most importantly, you learn about Simon. And you hate him. Mrs. Riley (she insists you call her Sarah) is such a lovely woman, and it's clear how much she cares about her living son, how hard she's trying to keep their relationship alive.
It's the second Mother's Day after you move in when you finally meet Simon. Your relationship with your own mother is complicated, so you've opted to spend the day with Mrs. Riley. You'd gotten her a small present, and had planned to spend the day drinking wine and watching historical romance movies.
You're thoroughly shocked when you knock on her door, and a man answers. Six feet, built like a brick house, but under his scowl, you recognize Sarah's eyes.
âYou must be Simon.â
His scowl deepens, but before he can say anything, Mama Riley is pushing past him, pulling you into her apartment to fuss over you.
She apologizes for not telling you sooner, but your plans will have to be rescheduled. Simon's back early, and she can't waste a precious second.
You're understanding. You've listened to her worried rants, given her space to cry over how things have turned out. You know she loves spending time with her son, even if the visits are short and he doesn't talk much.
Simon doesn't miss the way you glare at him. There's a fury in your eyes, even as you cheerily wish his mother a happy mother's day. For a moment, he wonders if you're a spy. But that thought is quickly diminished, when you verbally eviscerate him at the door.
You're quiet, not wanting to upset his mom, but your anger is clear. It may not be your business, but Mama Riley is your friend, and you adore the older woman. And you cannot stand by while he treats her like this. She loves her son so much, and he needs to step up and try harder.
As you're chewing him out, Simon's already head over heels, planning your wedding as the seconds tick by.
(A/N: You can read this as a stand alone piece, but I did write 3 more drabbles (four in total!) for this! They're all on my blog under the tag mama riley au. Thank you for reading!)
Part 2 Part 3 Part 4
#simon ghost riley#simon ghost riley imagine#simon ghost riley x reader#simon riley x reader#we're ignoring canon because this was all i could think about at work today#he'd get his shit together so fast. and his mom would immediately clock him for having a crush.#she'd be more protective of you than him lol#my writing#mama riley au
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Doting
Tags: jjk men as dads, tooth-rotting fluff, comfort drabbles
Synopsis: How the JJK men treat you while pregnant (spoiler warning- they dote on you.)
An: This is my formal apology for writing Nanami angst on the âBabyâs first wordsâ post đ it will never happen again (can we stop with the death threats now?)
SATORU ⢠SUGURU ⢠TOJI ⢠SUKUNA ⢠NANAMI
SATORU
Oh, your loving husband is all over you while youâre pregnant. He genuinely has such a cute fascination with all the changes your body is going through. He seriously thinks youâre so strong for carrying his heir.
He loves rubbing your bump. In fact, he will always be touching it in some form or fashion while you two are together. When heâs away on missions, he has you send him pictures and updates on your pregnancy as if anything major has changed in a couple of days.
You best believe he is ready to indulge you on your every craving, no matter how strange. Itâs three a.m and youâre crying because you need that specific brand of chicken wings and a can of whip cream? Heâs heading to the store immediately to fetch whatever you tell him to.
He genuinely worries about being a good dad. Many nights he lays his head on your bump and talks to you about how teaching didnât come naturally to him. He wasnât born knowing how to meet people where theyâre at. He use to expect people to be able to meet him on his level. He worries that he may inadvertently put a lot of pressure on his kid, and thatâs the last thing he wants due to how he was raised. He just wants his kid to be a kid.
Heâs the best, most loving and compassionate dad to your baby, more than you could ever hope for. Even if teaching didnât come to him naturally, being a father did.
SUGURU
Heâs such a âsit down and let me do it for youâ while youâre pregnant. He cooks, cleans, works, and tends to you completely throughout your pregnancy.
Suguru gets hyper fixated on your health during pregnancy. He only feeds you the yummiest and healthiest foods while youâre pregnant. He encourages for you to sit on the yoga ball and do (very) light exercises. He just wants the best for you and his baby.
Whenever I said he tends to you, I genuinely mean he tends to you. Heâll gently brush your hair at night time, rub your back when your belly is becoming heavy to carry around, serve your breakfast, lunch, and dinner in bed, carries around emesis bags and breath mints for if you get morning sickness while you two are out.
This man is the king of enforcing your boundaries to people when they donât listen. That really annoying family member that insists on being there for the birth even though youâve already explained to them that you want this to be an experience for just you and Geto? Yeah, heâs made it very clear to them that they will not be at the birth if they want to be in your kidâs life.
He is absolutely not afraid to hurt feelings if it means his wife and future child are safe and cared for. He really donât give a fuck who anyone else is. You and his child are first priority.
TOJI
Toji is definitely the type to express his love and devotion for you in other ways than the most conventional methods.
He is so incredibly gentle while youâre pregnant. He doesnât rile you up as much or play fight with you anymore. He constantly reminds himself that youâre carrying another life inside you and that you have enough on your plate.
This man⌠whew does he love seeing you pregnant. Tojiâs the type of man to feel so feral when he looks at you heavily pregnant with his kid.
He adores your body. Heâll rub lotion all over you and oils to help your skin accommodate to the stretch of carrying a kid. He massages your body and absolutely worships it while heâs rubbing the lotion and oil on you.
Your breasts are sore? Heâll gently massage them until they feel better. Your back hurts? Heâd be the type to lift your bump up and take the weight off you for as long as you ask him to so you can feel relaxed for a few minutes.
And look this is probably TMI but like, if you got a clogged milk duct due to breastfeeding, Toji would unfortunately be the type of man to fix that issue with his mouth. iâm sorry but he would.
Final thing is, you better believe that he doesnât allow anyone to get too close to you. He is so unbelievably protective over you while youâre pregnant. If he could, heâd lock you up at home to prevent anyone from getting close to you.
SUKUNA
On the outside, he acts very nonchalant and unbothered by your pregnancy. On the inside, he is constantly plagued by the thought that your body may not be able to carry his heir. The thought of losing you or his child haunts him.
He will secretly observe and take notes on your body and how it is changing. If he catches you expressing any sort of short windedness, he will immediately send you off to bed rest. Though, youâre usually able to convince him to take you off of it by the next day.
The only servant he trusts to tend to you is Uraume. No one else in his court is allowed to be anywhere near you unless he gives specific instructions. Still, he hates leaving you in the care of Uraume. He trusts them, but he wants to be the one to take care of you.
He loves holding your body close to him at night. All four arms are wrapped around you and holding you closely. Since he doesnât need much sleep, he will stay awake rubbing on your tummy all night long. One time, he felt the baby moving in your stomach while you were asleep. He was so intrigued that he woke you up and told you to âmake them do it againâ.
Now, he will randomly approach you at any given time while youâre heavily pregnant and hold his hand out so he can feel his baby moving around inside of you. It soothes his worry.
During birth, Sukuna was a complete mess. The amount of blood lost during birth fucking terrified him. He was panicking and yelling at anyone to do something to save you, even while everyone was assuring him that youâre okay and this was natural.
After 9 long excruciating months of extreme worry and constant fear, he finally feels peace when heâs cradling a newborn in his arm and a sleeping wife in the other arm. All of his hard work to protect you paid off he thinks.
NANAMI
Oh, to be pregnant by the king of domestic love himself.
Nanami is the type of man to immediately start working on a nursery for you as soon as you reveal to him that youâre pregnant. He immediately changes the guest bedroom into a nursery that you design for your little baby.
He reads up on all the parenting books and articles. Heâs constantly compiling things to either do or to not do during pregnancy and even while raising a kid.
Like Geto, he tends to your every need. He is a total house husband all while working 40 hours a week. When heâs at work, he is constantly calling and texting you to make sure that youâre okay and taking care of yourself, but letâs be fr he literally did everything for you before he even left for work (meal prepped for you, set out your clothes for you, put out all your self care items in case you want to bathe).
When you express concerns of your body getting bigger to him, he does everything in his power to show you that he loves and respects your body for creating life. He literally cherishes and worships your body for hours if you let him.
Like Toji, Nanami is protective over you. He constantly has an arm around you if you two are in public, and he watches everyone who dares to get close to you like a hawk. If he gets a bad vibe about anyone, heâs immediately stepping in front of you and taking over the conversation.
Nanami is the best partner to have during birth. His reading of articles during your pregnancy really paid off. He is supportive without being overbearing. He listens to your needs and tends to you without question. Constant praise and encouragement while youâre giving birth. The moment he gets to snuggle with you and the baby is the moment he realizes that he cultivated the life of his dreams. He has the family he always wanted.
#jjk#jjk fanfic#jujutsu kaisen#fanfic#drabble#gojo satoru#jjk gojo#jjk nanami#jujutsu satoru#satoru x reader#jjk satoru#jjk suguru#getou suguru x reader#geto suguru#jjk sukuna#sukuna x reader#jujutsu sukuna#sukuna#toji x you#jjk toji#toji fushiguro#toji x reader#nanami fluff#jujutsu nanami#nanami kento#nanami x reader#jjk fluff#tooth rotting fluff#jjk drabbles
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an iron man | oneshot
pairing: choi beomgyu x you
summary: beomgyu has only ever known how to live function as a rental sexbot. he fucks whoever and whatever comes his way with a forced smile plastered on his face. that is, until you, a self-proclaimed trainwreck, come along.
genre: android!au, sexbot!au, angst, romance, fluff (more than i ever thought i could ever write i fear...), skippable smut at the very end (will be marked)
warnings: very brief and vague mentions of beomgyu being forced to engage in sexual acts he does not want with previous clients, skippable smut at the very end (will be marked)
smut warnings: unprotected sex, creampie, cockwarming, praise, dacryphilia, sub!gyu
word count: 14.7k (trust i will not be writing this much again if this flops BWNWJSJEJDK)
notes: terrified to post this one because this is probably my favorite thing i've ever written and if it gets a bad reaction i might die :,) also very unsure if this is the best time to post it since it's during kinktober so i'm not sure if the demand is there but i love this work so so much i pray you all like it. if you don't read anything else from me, i hope that you read this bc i rlly care ab it :,) please don't be mean i beg
beomgyu doesnât know how long heâs been living like this. living is an odd term, too, and itâs not just because âlifeâ is ill-defined for an android, but because to call what he experiences a life feels like a bastardization of the term. his power is turned on at some point, usually late at night, he fucks or gets fucked by somebody he probably doesnât know, then he does the same shit all over again. so yes, he may be âaliveâ, but he wouldn't dare to call what he experiences living. living is too precious of a term to be used so cheaply on a sex android whoâs made available for rent for the highest bidder of the night.
heâs seen how people live through his scattered vignettes of human life. he only gets them when heâs powered on, but he soaks them up with pleasure because theyâre the only thing heâs ever known. some people do it wildly, living unattached to everyone and everything. their lives are not completely dissimilar to his, in a way, except they have a choice in the matter. they have time to find themselves, what their likes and dislikes are, and they get to connect with people in a way he will never have the power to. others, though, live the kind of life he really wants. they live by loving and being loved, knowing and being known. he wonders what itâd be like to know somebody outside of whatever secret deviant sexual pleasures they have. he wonders what itâs like to be known, too, but he guesses you would need to have something for someone to care enough to know about in the first place. he has no such thing.
itâs a night like any other when heâs powered on by a total stranger. he briefly takes in his surroundings and notices that itâs a really nice place, but you wouldnât be the first rich person to rent him â not by a longshot. next, he takes you in. now, thereâs no reason for you to dress up, really. you have no need to tempt him, as he will be able to feign attraction no matter what you look like, but he still finds it odd that you seem to have forgone any effort to appeal to him, if only because most peopleâs fantasies require them to look and feel sexy; but you donât look sexy at all. you look like youâve just gotten home from a long day at work, and honestly? you kind of smell like it, too.
âdo you think you could do the dishes for me? iâm exhausted,â you ask with a perfectly-timed yawn. what⌠?
he short-circuits for a moment as he tries to think of an appropriate response. heâs never had anyone try to get him to do chores for them, but maybe this is some sort of weird roleplay? maybe you want him to act as a house husband for you before doing the deed, which isnât necessarily a problem since heâs well-versed in acting, but thereâs just one issue.
âi donât know how,â he tells you honestly.
âyou donât know how to do dishes?â you ask curiously,Â
âitâs not in my programming,â he replies. if you didnât know any better, youâd say heâs embarrassed because of the way he hesitates and looks away from you when he says it. he canât possibly feel that, though, so it must just be your imagination.
âoh⌠thatâs alright. okay, do you know how to clean a room? mineâs kind of dirty,â you try.Â
ân-no,â he says, and he wishes the earth would just swallow him whole. heâs never failed at living up to expectations, and never so badly, at that. just what kind of fetish is this?Â
âthatâs okay,â you sigh, and he may not fully understand it, but he can sense your disappointment. âwell, what can you do?â and the question is not asked maliciously, but with what seems to be genuine wonder. ah. he knows how to answer this one. slowly, he walks up to you and loosens your hair. you look up at him in shock, but he just cups your face, swiping his thumb across your lower lip.Â
âi can do whatever you want me to, baby,â he whispers alluringly. âjust tell me how you like it.â youâre so stunned at his switch in demeanor that you forget how to speak for a moment, but you quickly recollect yourself and pry his hands off of you.
âi donât want you to do anything,â you insist. âiâm just tired. if you canât help me clean, thatâs alright. you can watch something if youâre bored. i think thatâs it. well, goodnight.â beomgyu is malfunctioning at the moment. he thinks the gears in his head might be sparking while he tries to understand this new development. you donât give him time to process it, though. you just slam your bedroom door shut behind you. he thinks he hears you lock it, too.
genuinely at a loss at the thought that he has nothing and no one to do, he sits himself on your couch. he tries not to make himself too at home at first, just barely making a dent on it and scooting to the very edge of the cushion as to not appear to be too relaxed. what if this is some sort of test? what if youâre actually going to come out soon so you two can fuck? until then, what should he do next? thoughts like this plague him until he accepts the fact that you are actually sleeping. your obnoxiously loud snoring is a dead giveaway, and he finally, finally feels brave enough to fiddle with your remote control.Â
he scrolls for something to watch. movies and shows have been on as background noise during sex before, so heâs somewhat familiar with them, but heâs never gotten the opportunity to pick for himself or actually pay attention to what's happening on screen. he settles on a romantic movie about a robot who joins human society. the robot falls in love with a human girl, but in the end, the robot has to leave the girl because the town wonât accept him, even after using him. she marries a human man and has children, and eventually grandchildren, too. she still loves the robot even though heâs gone, which he thinks is supposed to make him feel sorry for her, but all he can feel is pity for the robot, who spends the rest of his life alone.Â
itâs enough to make him cry, which he shouldnât be able to do in a non-sexual setting, but he does it, anyway. itâs just so unfair to him. the girl is able to live a normal life while the robot is doomed to be alone forever. why? because he was born different? itâs not his fault that he was invented, but he spends the rest of his time on earth paying for the crime of existing in a world not built for him. the more beomgyu thinks about it, the more wronged he feels. heâs outright sobbing by the time you plop down on the couch beside him. he jumps up and straightens his posture while trying in vain to regain his composure.
âyeah, this movie makes me cry, too,â you quietly remark. heâs silent, not because he didnât hear what you said, but because he genuinely doesnât know how to act after being caught red handed.
âcan i ask you something?â you ask in lieu of his lack of a response.
âyes,â he feebly answers.
âwhy are you crying?â you question with a tilt of your head, but something in him tells him that you already know.
âbecause the movie made me sad,â he admits after a pause.
âare androids supposed to feel things like that?âÂ
â... no,â he replies after a pause.Â
âthen why can you?âÂ
âi⌠i don't know. just please donât say anything to my owners,â he pleads. he knows that if the company that owns him were to find out about this, heâd be scrapped in a heartbeat. or worse, theyâd analyze him like a labrat to try to find the anomaly within him. his âlifeâ as a sexbot will be over, and heâd really rather be a box of scraps than live as a case study in a lab somewhere.Â
âitâs okay,â you tell him with a reassuring smile as you watch him trying not to spiral. âi wonât tell them. itâll be our secret.â beomgyu has never had a secret to share with anyone before, so he feels an overwhelming amount of excitement at the idea that he will finally have one. his chest feels warm at the thought.
âthank you,â he says with a grateful smile.
âno problem,â you reply with a yawn. âiâm tired, so iâm heading back to bed. i just wanted to get some water. goodnight, for real this time.âÂ
âgoodnight,â he murmurs softly. you return his words with a sleepy smile and go back into your room. he finds that heâs smiling even when you leave.Â
he spends the night consuming as much media as he conceivably can before he has to leave. usually, he'd be powered off after heâs done being used, so he greedily savors every moment he can. who knows if he'll ever get this chance again. when you wake up, you're surprised to see that he's exactly where you left him, still watching the screen intently.
âgood morning,â you say while stretching your arms.Â
âgood morning,â he replies.Â
âare you ready to be returned?â you ask.Â
â... yes,â he lies.Â
âokay. i think somebody will be here to pick you up in an hour or so. you hungry?âÂ
âi don't really eat,â he bashfully answers. for some reason, he's embarrassed at the fact that you're treating him like a human while he's unable to fully act like one.
âoh. i guess that makes sense,â you nod.Â
things are quiet until heâs picked up, but itâs not an awkward silence. you sit next to him on the couch as you wolf down some breakfast and let him watch whatever he pleases. when he eventually hears knocking at your door, he feels an incomprehensible sense of dread.
âi think that's them,â you remark, breaking the silence.Â
ây-yeah,â he replies.Â
âwell, it was nice to meet you,â you say, reaching out your hand for him. heâs unsure what to do with it. not missing a beat, you gently grab his hand and shake it. he's stunned at the physical contact, and he's still reeling when you let the man from the rental company in. you have a brief conversation with him before he walks towards beomgyu.
âgoodbye,â you tell the android with a smile and a little wave.Â
â... goodââ and the man switches him off.
-
the next time beomgyu is powered on, heâs in your house again. relief floods him when he realizes it. you donât seem as exhausted as the last time he saw you. when that was, he has no idea, but if he had to guess, heâd say it was just last night because of the fact that heâs so popular heâs rented almost every day.
âhey,â you greet him with a smile. heâs still feeling relieved before he realizes that tonight might be the night where you ask him to have sex with you. maybe you were just tired last night and had no desire to fuck, but he can tell that youâre feeling more energetic tonight.Â
âi didnât catch your name,â you add.Â
â... beomgyu. iâm part of the choi line, but iâm a custom model, so they gave me a name,â he tentatively replies.
ânice,â you nod, and you briefly introduce yourself before asking if he wants to watch a movie.Â
âwatch⌠a movie?â is this some sort of euphemism for fucking? it wouldnât be the first time heâs heard of something like this. as mentioned before, some people like movies as background noise.Â
âyeah, you can pick,â you say, casually plopping down on the couch and patting the cushion next to you. he hesitantly takes your cue, and heâs mentally preparing himself for what comes next before you take a blanket and cocoon yourself in it so tightly, itâd be impossible for him to touch you.
âwhatâs wrong?â you ask, and he jolts a bit when he realizes that heâs been staring in disbelief. âoh, are you cold? do you want a blanket, too?âÂ
ââm fine,â he replies.
âare you sure? the clothes they make you wear look a little thin,â you observe with your nose wrinkled, and he feels impossibly small under your surveying eye. âhere, iâll get you some sweats. i think soobin left some the last time he was here.âÂ
âwhoâs soobin?â he asks a little too quickly. so quickly, in fact, he doesnât even have time to process why he even asked.
âmy friend. stay here, iâll grab them for you.âÂ
when you return, you have a long pair of sweatpants in hand and a big t-shirt.Â
âyou can change in the bathroom. itâs down the hallway and to the left, okay?â he nods in response.
he strips his clothes off as best as he can, and it feels like heâs shedding a second skin. when heâs finished undressing, he pulls on the clothes you gave him and stares in the mirror. itâs in his programming to always be mindful of how he looks, but he feels especially self-conscious now that heâs wearing a normal outfit. he fixes up his hair and clears his throat before exiting your (messy) bathroom and making his way back into your living room. he finds you fiddling with your phone before you look up at him.
âtook you long enough,â you tease, and he blushes, which stuns you. just how human is this guy?
âs-sorry, i ââÂ
âhey, iâm just kidding. youâre fine. you look pretty good in those clothes â soobin would be jealous,â you chuckle. his ears perk up at the mention of soobin again. is he your boyfriend? he must be. why else would he have clothes at your house? is that why you don't want to sleep with beomgyu? because you have someone already? if that's the case, why rent him at all? but he is not brave enough to ask these questions, so he settles for a soft âthank youâ and returns to his spot on the couch.
you toss him the remote and he catches it with ease before unsurely flipping through your streaming services. he finds something that piques his interest and turns to you with an uncertain look before you nod encouragingly. he selects it and lets it play. he doesnât mean to, but he finds himself sinking further and further into the cushions as it progresses.Â
itâs a sweet movie â a romantic comedy about an amnesic woman whose memory is wiped clean every morning, but a man falls in love with her, anyway. she never remembers him, so he has to make her fall in love with him in a new way every day. he finds himself smiling throughout it, but a particularly funny scene has him actually laughing for the first time. itâs a squeaky sort of thing, and he has never laughed before, so heâs somewhat surprised as it leaves his throat. he looks to you in trepidation, but you just smile warmly and respond with a soft chuckle of your own. he finds that he looks to you every time a new development occurs, and you always answer encouragingly.Â
the end of the film surprises him. itâs bittersweet in that she never does get her memory back, but the man makes a video recounting their entire love story for her to watch every time she wakes up. it ends with them living happily together in spite of everything, and itâs enough to make him sob. he turns to you and sees that youâre teary-eyed as well, but you seem to be enjoying his reaction so much that thereâs still a grin on your face. after the film ends, you can tell that he has something on his mind.
âwhatâs wrong? didnât you like it?â you gently ask.
âi did. i just donât understand,â he replies timidly.
âdonât understand what?âÂ
âwhy he would do all of that for her, i guess,â he says.Â
âbecause he loves her. when you love somebody, youâd do anything to be with them. you always find a way,â you tell him, and the sentiment seems to strike a chord within him.
âeven if theyâre that different?â
âof course.â
-
beomgyu spends the following nights with this same routine. heâs switched on, sees you standing in front of him with a smile, gets comfortable, and watches as much media as he possibly can while you two chatter away about every scene. he learns much more from it than he ever did from experience with his previous renters, and he finds himself becoming more and more emotional by the day. you never try to question him or press him to explain any of his feelings, and it just makes him feel even more comfortable with you.Â
one day, he even feels comfortable enough to ask you a question. the question.Â
âcan i ask you something?âÂ
âof course! what is it?â you reply in earnest. beomgyu has never directly inquired about you.
âwhy do you rent me? i mean, i know we watch stuff together now, but why rent me in the first place?â and even when he feels exponentially more at ease with you than he ever has in any other context, heâs still nervous when he asks it.Â
âoh, my friend did it as a joke, i guess,â you shrug. âhe thought i needed to get laid or something, but iâm not into stuff like that, so i just thought iâd ask you to help me clean. obviously, thatâs what i actually need,â you giggle. what he feels at your words can only be described as disappointment. âstuff like thatâ? so youâre not into sleeping with sexbots? is it because you find them disgusting? is it because you find him disgusting? heâs not sure what he expected, but this wasnât it.
âoh. so why donât you buy a cleaning bot?â he asks softly, and while you are usually pretty perceptive of his emotions, you donât register the fact that heâs at a loss right now.
âi dunno. my parents were always against that sort of thing. they thought it was wrong, i guess, so i didnât grow up with them like everyone else did. i didnât really have an opinion on them until i met you,â you tell him while grinning and lightly nudging him with your elbow. he tries his best to smile because, in theory, your words are really sweet. you see him as more than just another android, so why does he feel like thatâs not enough?Â
the fragile connection you two have made seems even more fragile now. at least, it does to him. you only met each other because of a joke your friend just so happened to make, not because of fate or the divine intervention that he always sees in the movies. maybe in another world, your friend rented a different sexbot. maybe youâd even treat them the same way you treat him. the thought alone makes something ugly burn in his chest.Â
still, you are oblivious to the internal war raging within beomgyu.Â
âhey, iâve got an idea,â you tell him, and he perks up a bit. âhave you ever listened to music?âÂ
ânot really,â he replies solemnly. people have played it in the background of their sexual escapades, but he hasnât really gotten the chance to listen the same way humans do. you finally register his crestfallen appearance, but you chalk it up to him feeling like heâs missing out.Â
âwhy donât we listen to some? i can play a bunch of different genres so you can find what you like,â you suggest, and he agrees to it. truthfully, he doesnât fully understand how music can be better than movies and shows, but he is curious to find out what makes it so special.Â
and special, it is. he doesnât like every song you play, he realizes, but thatâs only natural given how different they are from each other. he finds himself being drawn to the more emotional and moody ones, but he canât help but enjoy the way you quietly sing and nod along to the more upbeat tunes.Â
as you continue to sit together, you begin to fiddle with your hair. youâre scoffing and loosening it for the umpteenth time before youâre about to give up, but beomgyu stops you.
âlet me do it,â he says.
âdo you know how?âÂ
âi think i can. iâve been watching you,â he says simply.
â... okay.âÂ
you turn your back to him to give him access to your hair and he scoots closer to you. closer than youâve ever been. his touch on your head is careful as he gently gathers your hair and begins to braid it. youâre not sure how much time passes because heâs actually quite slow, but itâs relaxing all the same. you find yourself softly humming to the tune of the song playing. the lyrics are a little dark, but you follow along in earnest, and beomgyu thinks he finally understands why people like music so much. for moments like this. he tries to soak up every detail he can, from the way the light hits your frame to the melody you hum, and he wishes this moment could last forever.
but you only have so much hair, so the moment does have to end, eventually. he ties up your hair and you pull out your phone camera to admire his handiwork. admittedly, itâs a lot better than anything you couldâve done. it seems that heâs a fast learner.
âthis looks perfect! thanks, beoms,â you say warmly. heâs stunned for a second at the nickname.
âbeoms?âÂ
âyeah, like beomgyu. beoms,â you say with a casual shrug, and something in his chest blossoms. âi give all of my friends nicknames.â and something in his chest explodes at the title of âfriendâ.Â
âyou do?â he asks excitedly.
âyeah. like, i call soobin âsoobinieâ or âsoobieâ, sometimes,â you giggle, and the bloom of hope in his chest dies with it.Â
âare you two close?â he asks, even though he knows the answer will probably hurt him.
âvery. heâs my best friend,â you answer fondly. oh. youâre beomgyuâs best friend â youâre beomgyuâs only friend, and tentatively at that. the idea that the deep connection he feels with you is even deeper with someone else, at least in your eyes, makes him feel sick. do you let soobin play with your hair? do you hum along to songs youâve shown him while he does it? do you smile at him after heâs finished and compliment him on his skills? probably, probably, probably. the ugly feeling that was previously completely foreign to him now takes its usual place in his chest, and it makes his stomach hurt so much that if he could vomit, his metaphorical dinner would be all over the floor.
âoh,â is all he can say.Â
-
days turn into weeks, and weeks turn into months, but every time beomgyu awakens, he finds you smiling up at him. this canât be good for your bank account â heâs quite expensive to rent, after all â but heâs far too afraid to actually bring it up. what if you realize just how much money youâre sinking into him and want to stop renting him? what will he do if you donât want him anymore? he feels an incomparable sense of dread at the thought.Â
he prepares to sit on the couch and watch something, listen to music, or even play a video game with you. you two have gotten into them recently, and heâs discovered that he very much enjoys playing with you, even when youâre yelling at him and demanding that he stop letting you win. he canât help but grin when he thinks about it. you start playing a song, and you do, indeed, invite him to sit on the couch, but you donât sit down next to him and start babbling away about your day like you usually would.Â
âdo you think you could do me a favor?â you ask.Â
âwhat, do you want me to wash your dishes?â he jokes, and you share a laugh before you say your next words, but all laughter and joy is profusely sucked out of him when you say them.
âno, smartass, but can you braid my hair for me? iâm going over to soobinâs tonight, and i want it out of my way.âÂ
âsoobinâs?â
âyeah, itâs been a while since iâve stayed the night, and he said weâre way past due for it,â you tell him, and the world as beomgyu knows it comes crashing down around him.Â
âyouâre staying the night with him?âÂ
âmhm. heâs right, itâs been too long; but donât worry, i bought a pass so you can play video games online. thereâs even a headset so you can talk to people, if you want. maybe youâll even make some friends,â you say while playfully waggling your eyebrows. beomgyuâs silence is pensive, to say the very least, and you worry that heâs apprehensive of making a friend that isn't you.Â
âseriously, you might like it. itâll be good for you to meet more people, honestly. iâm sure itâs driving you crazy to only have me to talk to,â you jokingly add, but to beomgyu, itâs the worst joke heâs ever heard. no, it does not drive him crazy to only talk to you every day. in fact, even though heâs not conscious during the time you spend away from each other, he thinks, deep down, that he still somehow misses you when youâre apart. and no, he does not think he needs to have anyone but you. you are more than enough for him, so how could you ever think he needs more? again, he is taunted by that same strange and implacable feeling heâs been having ever since he met you, yet he canât quite put his finger on it, even when he nods and tells you that heâll try making new friends.Â
but as he brushes out your hair and you sing along to the words:
"iâm glad i didnât die before i met you
but now i donât care
i could go anywhere with you
and iâd probably be happy"
he finally understands what that feeling is. that warm, all-consuming feeling. that feeling of comfort, safety, and unconditional understanding. that feeling of infinite curiosity about the other person. that feeling of wanting to known and be known in a way so profound it physically aches.Â
yes, as he gathers your hair and ever-so-gently twists it in his hands in preparation for you staying the night with a man you clearly prefer over him, the feeling becomes clear as day. love. what he feels for you is love â an emotion he should never be able to even fathom, yet he does.Â
and it makes him loathe himself to a degree he never thought he was capable of.
heâs so put off by this sentiment, he almost canât finish the braid because his hands are shaking so much, but somehow, he finishes, anyway.Â
âare you done?â you ask as you fiddle with your hair and look back at him.
âmhm,â he replies.Â
âyay! thank you!â you say giddily.Â
âyouâre welcome,â he mumbles. youâre not stupid, so you notice that something is off about him, but you just assume itâs because heâs nervous about being left alone to make new friends. you feel guilty in a certain sense, but itâll be good for him to branch out and meet new people, so you tuck the feeling away as best as you can before packing your nightly essentials and getting ready to leave.
âiâll be back tomorrow morning,â you tell him, and he only nods with his lips pursed, which makes your heart feel sour.
âtry not to miss me too much,â you tease, but it doesnât seem to cheer him up in the slightest.Â
âhave fun,â he replies weakly, and your previously sour heart now kind of aches, but you have to do this for him. you can't always be beside him for everything, right? besides, it's only for the night.
you open the door to leave, but before you go, you turn back to him and he senses hesitation in you. before he can question it, youâre opening your arms, and his eyes widen when he realizes youâre inviting him in for a hug. you almost regret doing it as soon as you open them for fear of making him uncomfortable, but he embraces you before you have time to process such feelings. on beomgyuâs end, he has always been wary of touch for obvious reasons, but he gravitates towards your open arms like he was meant to be in them.
he rests his chin on the top of your head for a moment and you spend an unknown length of time just standing with your arms wrapped around each other.Â
âiâll miss you,â you admit, and before you can smack yourself for being so dramatic and sentimental over what will ultimately only be one night, you can swear you feel his grip tightening even more around you.
eventually, you break away and look up at him with a smile. you ruffle his hair and promise to see him later, and he answers you with a nod. then, you're leaving and locking the door behind you.
immediately, beomgyu feels a sense of loss heâs never felt before. after all, to experience loss, you must have something worth losing in the first place, and he has never had anything like that. at least, not until you. so he stands at the door for who knows how long, just like a puppy waiting for his owner to get home.Â
-
soobin can sense youâre out of it before you even finish crossing through his doorway, and it puts a halt to your typically overdramatic greeting.Â
âwhatâs the matter? are you feeling okay?â he questions concernedly as he pulls you in for a hug. you nod before you break apart from him and walk through the threshold.Â
ây-yeah. itâs just, i donât know, i guess i just feel bad about leaving beomgyu all by himself,â you tell him as you plop down on his couch.Â
âthe android youâve been renting?â he asks incredulously. âiâve been meaning to ask you about that, actually. whyâre you renting it so much? i barely even see you anymore. is the sex that good?âÂ
âyou know i donât use androids like that,â you snap in annoyance, partially because heâs calling beomgyu âitâ.
âi know, which is why iâm so confused. why rent it in the first place if youâre not getting anything out of it?âÂ
you struggle to answer his question. you promised beomgyu youâd keep his secret, but you trust soobin, and you know he wonât judge him, or worse, report him. besides, itâll be good to have an unbiased third party weigh in on the situation. with this in mind, you tell him about beomgyu, skipping over some of the more personal details. heâs in disbelief at first and actually thinks youâre just fucking with him, but as you tell him more and more about the time youâve spent together, his smile falls and his face turns serious.Â
âso thatâs why i feel so guilty about leaving him alone,â you finish with a deep sigh. heâs silent for a few moments before collecting his thoughts.
âgod, i canât believe this is actually happening,â he whispers.
âi know. itâs insane, but itâs true. heâs just so⌠human. you should've seen the way he looked at me when i told him i was leaving. i donât think iâve ever seen anyone look so sad before.âÂ
âwell, youâre right about him needing to make friends,â he says with a nod, and it validates all of your misgivings about leaving him alone. âbut donât you think you should, i donât know, think about what all of this means?âÂ
âwhat do you mean?â you ask, and in that moment, he knows you have no idea about the way beomgyu probably feels about you. heâs not 100% confident in his deductions, but the way you describe how beomgyu acts around you pretty much tells him everything he needs to know.Â
âi mean, you basically have a completely sentient creature who relies on you for everything. if heâs as human as you say he is, then he can probably feel everything that we do. right now, iâd guess that he feels like youâre all he knows.â and the sneaking sense of guilt that was previously threatening to creep up on you is now completely overwhelming. youâre all he knows. and you left him all alone to fend for himself and make his own friends. yes, he needs to learn how to make connections, but how could you expect him to know how to do that? it took weeks for him to finally seem comfortable around you, so how could he possibly know how to make them on his own? moreover, even though it's nothing to you, you're his entire world. he must feel like you abandoned him.
âiâve gotta go,â you mumble.
âwhat?â he asks.Â
âiâiâve gotta go home,â you repeat as you hurriedly stand up and hug him goodbye.Â
âwait! i think you should ââÂ
âlove you, bye!â you shout as you book it out of the doorway.Â
-
when you return home, you open the door to see beomgyu listlessly staring at the television screen. when he hears you, he turns to look at you with watery eyes. he looks so lost in this moment, and all of your suspicions are confirmed.
âbeoms, i am so sorry,â you tell him as you rush over and throw your arms around him.Â
âfor what?â he asks with a gulp as he stays in your embrace, shakily wrapping his arms around your waist.
âiâm sorry for leaving you all by yourself. i thought it was just for one night, so itâd be alright, but you donât have anyone but me right now; and i realize that itâs unfair for me to expect you to meet other people all on your own when youâve never had to do it before. if you want friends, iâll help you, okay? iâll be there with you as you do it,â you tell him, and you feel his body trembling.Â
âi-iâm sorry. i know itâs not a big deal, but when youâre not with me, i feel so scared. i⌠i donât know how to do anything by myself. iâm s-sorry i need you so much,â he whispers, and your heart breaks.Â
âdonât be sorry,â you say gently. âhow about this: iâll join you online and we can talk to people together. then, when youâre ready, you can start hanging out with my friends in person, too, okay? we can keep going until you donât need me anymore.â beomgyu outwardly agrees, which seems to put you at ease, but thereâs just one issue: heâll always need you.
-
gaming online is actually really fun, but making friends is hard for someone like beomgyu. heâs quiet and a little awkward at first, but after a few nights and with your help, he finally warms up to the people he games with. he gets so comfortable, in fact, that heâs even able to shit talk with them a little.Â
âfuckkk, thatâs so unfair!â his new friend, kai, wails over the headset.Â
âitâs not unfair, you just suck,â beomgyu chuckles, and kai whines again. you laugh at their interaction before kai continues.
âhow are you so fucking good at this game? youâve only been playing for a few nights, and youâre already better than me!â he pouts.Â
âiâm just gifted,â beomgyu boasts.
âvery true,â you add, and he beams, but kaiâs next words throw him off-kilter.
âwhatever. stop asking your girlfriend to argue with me â you two make me sick,â he jokes with his signature maniacal laugh, but the two of you are too stunned to laugh along. you look at each other in sheer embarrassment, and you can see beomgyuâs ears turning bright pink beneath his blond hair. youâre not sure why you feel so mortified, but you do. this is beomgyu, for godâs sake. thereâs no earthly way you could ever see him in anything other than a purely platonic way, so why does your heart feel uneasy at the notion? while youâre still too stunned to speak, beomgyu tries to pipe up and respond.
âsh-sheâs â weâre not, uh ââÂ
âdamn it!â kai yells as his character dies yet again, and any momentum beomgyu previously had to clear up the misunderstanding is killed stone dead in its tracks.Â
he turns to look at you unsurely, but the awkward moment seems to have passed for you as you laugh at kaiâs characterâs death. if only he could be as unfazed.
after kai goes offline, you two decide to quit gaming for the night. you turn to beomgyu nervously, and he immediately knows that youâre going to say something serious. he hopes beyond hope that itâs not about what kai said.
âcan i ask you something?â and his heart sinks. oh god, you probably caught onto his feelings. heâs not sure he has the confidence to tell the truth, but how could he lie to you?
ây-yes,â he replies, voice a bit unsteady.
âokay, you can say no if you want, but soobin invited us to a get together heâs having pretty soon. itâs not anything too crazy, so thereâll only be a few of us. i think itâll be a good start for you. maybe youâll even make some new friends, you know?â heâs silent at your words just out of sheer shock. heâd definitely missed the mark when guessing your intentions.Â
âitâs okay to say no,â you hurriedly add, âbut my friends are really nice, and iâd be with you the entire time. even if you donât talk to anybody, you can talk to me.â
âokay,â he agrees before he can even really think about it. he guesses heâs just relieved that you still donât know about his feelings, but part of him aches even still.Â
âreally?â you ask incredulously. âoh my god! i have to tell soobin â heâll be so excited!â you babble, and his lips curl upwards at how happy you are. he wishes he could always make you happy like this, and it seems that heâd agree to absolutely anything if you were the one asking.
-
work has been especially taxing today, which is nothing new, but you have this insatiable suspicion that something feels⌠off as you finish up for the day. as youâre about to head out for the night, you wonder what beomgyu will want to do once you get home. maybe heâll want to play games with kai, or maybe heâll want to watch a movie with you. maybe heâll let you cuddle up to him for warmth, which heâs been very willing to do, lately. the unspoken rule that you two will never touch has become blurry for some reason, but youâre pretty touchy with all of your friends, so it only feels like a matter of course to you.Â
youâre thinking about all of the potential ways tonight could play out when it hits you: you didnât reserve beomgyu. you spit out a curse and hurriedly take out your phone to book him, but itâs too late. heâs already assigned to someone for the night. fuck.
when you get home, youâre anxious beyond belief. you havenât spent a night without beomgyu in months, but more importantly, he hasnât spent a night without you. you try not to think about how scared he will be when heâs powered on in a strangerâs home. you hope heâs able to just switch back to his initial programming, but somehow, you just know it wonât be that easy. you feel sick with worry when you think about how someone so human will have to involuntarily turn his feelings off and pretend to enjoy something heâs being forced to do â with no compensation, no less. he must think you abandoned him. he must think you donât care about him. how could you forget to reserve him when he needs you so much? fuck how busy you were with work, his wellbeing should have been your first priority.
so you sit and watch the hours tick by. you try to relax. you try to tell yourself itâs only for one night, and heâs been doing it for years, but something just feels wrong, wrong, wrong. youâre about to try to force yourself to go to sleep so the night ends more quickly when you hear a rapid knocking on your door. itâs strange for someone to call on you so late, indeed, but when you look through your peephole, you see none other than the very boy youâve been worrying about.Â
âbeomgyu?â you say incredulously when you swing open the door. immediately, he embraces you, and you feel hot tears streaming down your neck as he nuzzles his face into it. you hold him as best as you can as you rub circles into his back and try to shush his cries.
âitâs okay, iâm here,â you tell him, and he whines. you try to break away to get a good look at him, but he just pulls you in even closer, as if youâre his only lifeline in this world, and in a way, you are.
after his breathing slows and his sobs die out, he reluctantly parts from you, so you hold his hand and lead him to your couch. his eyes are swollen and bloodshot while his nose is a bright pink, but he never once takes his eyes off of you for fear of letting you out of his sight. in his mind, you canât leave as long as he can see you.
âare you alright?â you tentatively ask, hand still holding his and soothingly caressing it in an attempt to calm him down. he goes to nod before stopping himself and shaking his head in the negative. your eyes soften even more at the action.
âdo you want to talk about what happened?â you try, and he nods before clearing his throat.
âi, um, i woke up and i was at this womanâs house. she⌠she wanted me to get undressed, but i didnât want to, so she started doing it for me.â you wince at his words, but heâs not finished yet.Â
âshe kept touching me, and it was so disgusting i just â i just couldn't stand it, so i ran away and came here. i donât mean to make your life harder, and i wonât ask for you to stay the night with me anymore, but if you could just let me stay here, i promise iâll learn how to clean or do anything you want. please, just donât make me ââÂ
âbeomgyu, stop it,â you say softly, but firmly. âyou are not making my life harder. you can stay here as much as you want and do whatever you want while youâre here. iâm so sorry, i didnât mean for this to happen. i was just so busy with work, and by the time i realized it, somebody had already booked you. i promise you that itâll never happen again, okay? so you don't have to be afraid. iâm not leaving you, and i wonât let anyone hurt you, either.âÂ
you donât think youâve ever seen anyone look so relieved before. it looks as though you just saved his life, and to beomgyu, you essentially did. he holds your hand even tighter, as if youâre the only thing keeping him from falling off the face of this planet.Â
âwait here, iâll get you some clothes,â you say gently, but as you go to leave, he holds you even tighter. your eyebrow quirks in a silent question at his actions, and he looks sheepish for a moment before saying his next words.
âc-can we just stay like this for a bit? just for a little while? iâm still scared,â he mumbles, and your heart melts.
âof course. come here,â you beckon, and he falls into your arms and rests his head on your shoulder, breathing your scent in as he tries to imprint this moment into his hardware. you stay like that for a while before you finally convince him to change out of his uncomfortable clothes. he reluctantly lets you go, and his eyes follow you everywhere you walk.Â
that night, you stay up later than usual to spend more time with him. he stays glued to your side and ensures that heâs always touching you in some way, which is endearing in a way you canât seem to put into words. when youâre about to head to bed for the night, you swear you hear him whimper, but he lets you go, anyway. as you lay your head down and get comfortable under the covers, you hear a timid knocking on your door. you call him in, and his gaze shyly flickers between you and the floor.Â
âc-can i stay with you tonight? i wonât bother you, i swear. itâs just â i just still feel weird. y-you can say no! i just thought that ââ
âcome here,â you softly interrupt, and he doesnât hesitate to listen. he closes the door behind him and shuffles towards you, stopping uncertainly at the edge of the bed in a silent plea for permission to enter it. you feel a weird, warm feeling in your chest when he does it. you scoot over and pat the open space next to you before he gathers enough courage to slide in. you cover him with your blanket, and he stiffly accepts it. you giggle at his awkwardness and cuddle up to him, placing your arms around his waist before thinking better of it. how could you just invade his personal space when heâs clearly traumatized? you go to remove your arms and scoot away before he firmly locks you in place.
âitâs okay,â he whispers, settling himself into your embrace and mindlessly toying with the ends of your hair.
âare you sure?â you ask.
âiâm sure.â
it isn't long before beomgyu hears your breathing slow down, and eventually he hears you begin to snore. he smiles at the sound. he can't really sleep, but he's perfectly content with watching you rest. he continues to play with your hair, and you nuzzle into his touch every so often. he doesnât want to repeat the events leading up to tonight, but he would do it all over again â any number of times â with a smile on his face if it meant he got to be with you like this again.Â
-
the next morning, beomgyu waits for the usual delivery guy from the company to pick him up, but itâs currently way past the usual pickup time. heâs most certainly not complaining, but you donât seem even remotely fazed by the matter. however, while youâre casually flipping through your streaming catalog literal hours after heâd already be gone, he canât stop himself from asking:
âum, d-do you know when iâm being picked up?â you pause, and he worries that he may have said the wrong thing before you turn to him.
âdo you want to be picked up?â you ask solemnly.
ân-no! of course not. itâs just, you know, iâd usually be gone by now, so i ââÂ
âdo you want to stay here? with me, i mean,â you interrupt.
âi⌠i do,â he replies with a gulp. usually, thatâd be all you get from him, but it feels like the perfect opportunity to be honest about his feelings. âi always want to stay with you, but i know iâm expensive, and i donât want to be a bother.â he looks ashamed as he admits it, but if he had the courage to look in your eyes, heâd note the fondness that lies within them.
âi told you that youâre not a bother to me. i also told you that you could stay here for as long as you want, remember?â and he does, so he nods.Â
âalright. i meant it when i said it last night, and i mean it now. if you want to be here, you can stay for as long as youâd like. you don't have to worry about your owners anymore, i promise.â and he thinks heâs never seen you as serious as you are now. he wonders what you mean before it dawns on him.
âyou⌠did you buy me?â he asks in disbelief.
ây-yeah. iâm sorry, it sounds so gross when i hear it out loud, but that doesnât mean that i own you or anything. what i really wanted to buy was your freedom, so you can stay as long as you want, but that also means that you can leave whenever you want, too.â
âiâm so sorry,â he says in a hushed, hurried tone. âi know i'm expensive. iâm really sorry.â
âmoney is not an object to me,â you dismiss in faux arrogance with a wave of your hand in hopes that itâll lighten the mood, but beomgyu canât stop the tears from falling over his waterlines, and youâre afraid your attempt to help him only made him feel more indebted to you. all worry is promptly washed away when you feel him pull you into his arms.Â
âthank you,â he just barely breathes out. âi donât know how iâll ever pay you back, but iâll try, i swear.â
âyou donât have to do anything for me, beoms. i shouldâve done it a lot sooner, but iâm just a little slow, i guess,â you muse, and he chuckles softly into your neck.
-
sleeping with beomgyu shouldâve only happened once, but every night when you say youâre heading to bed, he looks at you with puppy eyes and you find yourself inviting him to come along. each time, he looks so excited that if he had a tail, it would most certainly be wagging. he obediently follows you to your room and settles into the empty space next to you before holding you in his arms as you drift off. heâs even taken to humming the tunes of songs he likes when you struggle to settle down, and his baritone voice lulls you to sleep like a charm every time. he spends his time by just looking at you and trying to reconcile with his new reality. this is real. he gets to spend however many nights he wants next to you, as per your own words. even if you didnât mean them, he plans to take them seriously. he is perfectly content with spending the rest of his life just sleeping with you, looking at you, being with you.Â
-
soobinâs get together is tonight, and you look different than usual. your typical look is very casual, which makes sense because youâre only ever at home when youâre with him, but you are now primped and ready to be seen, and it makes him anxious because you look even more lovable. he knows these people are your friends, so they mustâve seen you dressed up before, but that only makes him all the more uneasy; they know a side of you he is only now seeing, and it makes that same old ugly feeling he's grown so accustomed to sprout in his chest.Â
when you arrive at soobinâs place, the first thing you do when soobin swings open the door is jump in his arms like you didnât just see him a week ago. he spins you around with a dimpled grin thatâs so sincere, beomgyu feels emotionally decimated by it. you both giggle as you break apart, and the jealousy beomgyu feels brewing within feels unpacifiable.Â
âis this beomgyu?â soobin asks, grin still very much apparent.
âyes! youâre gonna love him,â you answer giddily.Â
âitâs nice to meet you,â soobin says warmly while stretching out his hand, which beomgyu awkwardly shakes while he tries to force his lips to curl upwards in what he prays is a believable smile.
ânice to meet you,â he mumbles.
âeveryoneâs already here, but youâre late as always,â soobin playfully chastises, and you pout in response.
everyone greets you when you walk in, mostly by hugging you and lightheartedly scolding you for not coming out anymore. theyâre very clearly bantering with you, but each reproach feels like a knife to beomgyuâs heart. heâs the reason you havenât seen them in so long.Â
clueless to it all, you introduce him as your friend to everyone, which only makes him feel worse, somehow. he is just one friend out of many, meanwhile youâre his entire world. youâre far too caught up in the joy of seeing some of your favorite people after so long to notice his dismay, however.
you lead him to soobinâs couch to have a seat with you and one of your friends, taehyun maybe, offers him a drink, to which he awkwardly declines. you quickly follow up with something to the effect of âhe isnât much of a drinker,â and beomgyu nods in affirmation. you try your best to include beomgyu in conversation, but theyâre all talking about people and places he doesn't know. all he knows is you, and the world you two built together seems smaller and smaller with every new topic of conversation.Â
he notices that soobin seems to be eyeing him somewhat strangely, though he tries his best to play it off. he could just attribute it to surface level curiosity, but his intuition tells him itâs much deeper than that. is soobin sizing up his competition? maybe so, but thereâs not much to see. beomgyu is handsome, and he knows it, but soobin knows a side of you beomgyu has only ever heard stories about. youâve told him about your friends and the goings on between you and your coworkers, but it pales in comparison to actually meeting them. he makes an internal note to ask even more questions than he usually does the next time youâre telling him about your day. until then, he sits as close to you as humanly possible and clings onto your arm, which is so second nature to you, you don't even notice that heâs doing it.Â
soobin, who is usually not the inquisitive type, canât help but question the dynamic between you and beomgyu. at first, the lingering glances and intimate gestures were innocuous enough to be written off as mere friendliness, but when you whisper something in beomgyuâs ear and he flushes a bright pink, soobin knows he canât ignore it any longer. he especially canât ignore it when you turn away from beomgyu and he raises a hand to the ear you just whispered into as if heâs reliving the moment. well, time to test his theory.Â
soobin slides into the open cushion next to you and begins excitedly chattering about how pretty you look tonight, and he even takes your braided hair into his hands and twirls it between his fingers.
âyour hair looks pretty,â he muses.
âbeomgyu did it, actually,â you grin, and soobin glances over to said boy, who is currently glaring daggers at him. the look in beomgyuâs eyes is so intense, he almost wants to back off, but he has to get to the bottom of this.Â
âdid he? you know, itâs been a while since you stayed over. wanna have a sleepover tonight? you have some clothes here from last time, and we can cuddle, i know you like that,â he says as innocently as he possibly can.Â
before you can even reply, beomgyu is slamming his hands on the coffee table. you turn to face him in surprise, and the look on his face is the angriest youâve ever seen him. his eyes are dark and his nostrils are flared as he heavily breathes. heâs never been angry at all in front of you, actually, so to say youâre taken aback is the understatement of the century.Â
âbeoms? whatâs wrong?â you ask concernedly, completely turning away from soobin. your voice is enough to somewhat placate him, but before he can fully calm down, soobin is saying his next words.
âiâm sure heâs fine. beomgyu, you can find your way home tonight on your own, canât you?â beomgyu is positively seething at this. before you can question him again, heâs gripping your hand so tightly itâs like itâs the only thing keeping him from drowning, so you excuse the both of you and drag him to the bathroom for some privacy.
âare you alright?â you ask, frantically scanning his figure for some sort of sign of pain or discomfort.Â
âi-iâm fine, i just, uh, i donât feel good,â he says flatly.Â
âwhatâs wrong? is it too much? do we need to go home?â heâs so flustered, he barely registers that youâre calling your house âhomeâ, but he still notices it in spite of everything, and itâs like a balm on his aching heart.Â
ây-yeah, can we go home? please?â he pleads, and you hurriedly nod.Â
âof course, just let me say bye to everyone before we leave, okay?â and he wants to say no, but heâs as weak as ever in front of you, so he relents.
that doesnât stop him from gripping your hand, though, as you say goodbye to everyone. you go to give soobin your usual hug, but beomgyu pulls you back to him even more tightly. you write it off as him not feeling well and just wanting to leave as soon as possible, to which you oblige, and before you know it, you two are scurrying out of soobinâs place like thereâs something chasing you.
as youâre driving home, you feel your phone buzz in your pocket, but it isnât until youâre walking through your doorway that you check it.Â
soobie: we need to talk. call me as soon as you get home
youâre worried beyond belief at his serious tone, so you tell beomgyu that youâve got to make a call before ducking into your bedroom. you donât shut the door behind you, because why would you?Â
you quickly call soobin and the line connects after just one ring.
âwhatâs wrong?â you ask anxiously, and soobin just sighs, which makes you all the more anxious.
âwe have to talk about beomgyu.âÂ
âbeomgyu? what about him? is something wrong?â you question.
âyeah, i mean, maybe. this might sound crazy, but i think â i know â he likes you.â youâre stunned silly for just a moment before bursting into laughter.
âlikes me? what the hell are you talking about?â you dismiss, and you sense his agitation even through the phone.
âiâm serious. i had a feeling before, but tonight just confirmed it. he likes you.â youâre silent for a moment, just trying to process his words, but once your mind somewhat clears, you canât help but deny, deny, deny.
âyouâre wrong. itâs not like that at all. iâm just the first person whoâs ever treated him nicely, and i ââÂ
âyouâre not listening,â he cuts in irritatedly. âhe looked like he wanted to skin me alive tonight. how else do you explain that?âÂ
âsoobie,â you sigh. âyouâve got it all wrong. maybe youâre right and maybe he was feeling insecure, but thatâs probably because iâm the only person he knows. he most likely just felt like you were stealing my attention away.âÂ
âyouâre always so dense about these things, you know?â he groans. âokay, look, iâm not sure how they came about, but i do know that he has feelings for you. maybe it started out as dependence, iâm not sure, but itâs definitely much more than that now.âÂ
âthatâs impossible,â you snort, actually feeling a bit impatient now. how could he possibly think that your relationship with beomgyu was anything other than platonic?Â
âwhy? because heâs a robot?â oh, that shuts you up. âjust think about it. if he were a human, would you still be saying the same thing? like i said before, if heâs as human as you say he is, he can feel the same way we do, and heâs definitely capable of feeling love, too.â you are, again, stunned into silence. suddenly, as if there was a fog that covered your brain before, things that you never really considered become clear to you. the soft touches, the gentleness. sleeping in the same bed and waiting for you to get home. wanting you â needing you â around all the time. the way he plays with your hair. the way heâs so interested in everything you have to say. the clinginess, the dependence. it all makes so much more sense to you.Â
âi ââ you begin, but you just so happen to glance up and see beomgyu right outside of your doorway⌠looking absolutely devastated.Â
âiâve gotta go,â you tell soobin as you hang up, not even bothering to say your usual goodbye.Â
âbeoms, did you hear us?â you ask tentatively, and he flinches a little bit before looking down at the floor and nodding.
youâre unsure of how to navigate this situation from here, but while youâre still trying to figure it out, beomgyu speaks.
âi-iâm so sorry,â he says hurriedly. âi understand if you donât want me anymore.âÂ
âw-what? no, i ââÂ
âiâm just really sorry,â he says, looking as ashamed as a person ever could. âi know itâs wrong, i know itâs disgusting, but i ââÂ
âbeomgyu.âÂ
âbut i canât help it. i wish i could, but i just canât; and i understand if you want to return me or whatever, but if you could just ââÂ
âbeomgyu, stop it,â you interrupt firmly, no room for argument. he stares at you with defeated eyes, and you feel your heart break in two. âi am not disgusted, and i donât want to return you.â his eyebrows furrow as if he doesn't quite understand, so you continue.Â
âyour feelings are not disgusting to me, donât ever say that again, okay? please? it makes me sad,â you plead, and he hesitantly nods. âi think itâs normal, actually. you donât really know anybody else other than me, so of course youâre confused.âÂ
âconfused?â he asks incredulously, eyes snapping up to meet yours.
âconfused,â you nod. âit'll change once you meet more people, i swear.â you try to smile reassuringly, but suddenly, you see tears welling up in beomgyuâs eyes.Â
âbeoms?â you carefully try.
âi don't need to meet more people. i just need you,â he chokes out. âdon't tell me i'm confused because i'm not. i-i'd rather you just say you don't want to be with me than tell me that.â your heart clenches at his words, but he continues.Â
âi just want to be with you, no one else,â he tells you desperately. âi can understand if you don't feel the same way, but i can't stand to hear you say i donât love you, because i do. i really, really do.â and as if you're dissociating, your mind is bombarded by times where he's shown you this exact sentiment. again, you go back to every intimate moment you two have ever shared. it was easy to just chalk it up to his lack of experience, but when he's telling you that's not the case so earnestly, is it truly possible to still believe itâs nothing? after a while, you decide that it most certainly is not.Â
the question is: do you feel the same way? you try to put a name to the feelings you have when youâre with him. the trust you have, the understanding. the desire to share everything you know and like with him, no matter how mundane it may seem to others; and consequently, the endearment towards him when you see how eager he is to listen. more than that, the intimacy between you two. how you like waking up to him smiling down at you, and how when something happens, heâs the first one you want to tell, good or bad. how when you listen to new music, you feel excited at the prospect of sharing it with him.Â
you realize you want to know more about him, the happy things and even the sad things. why he is the way that he is, why he thinks the way he thinks. the peace you feel when heâs running his fingers through your hair and holding you close when you watch the same film for the dozenth time. you try to picture a world where somebody else rented him. a world in which somebody else got to see him as soon as they wake up or as soon as they get home from a particularly grueling day at work, and you finally understand that you wouldnât like that at all. but why? youâve only ever thought of him as a friend, right? so why does it matter to you?Â
your eyes focus on beomgyu again, and you notice how utterly defeated he looks. his heart is on full display for you â and you alone â as tears stream freely down his pretty, doll-like face. are these tears just for you? you think so. is it safe to trust that these feelings he has for you are real? youâre not sure, but you want to. still, thereâs something stopping you.
âi think⌠i think i feel the same way,â you admit, and his previously downtrodden appearance immediately lights up with hope. âbut we shouldnât.â and the words are like lead in your mouth.Â
âwhy not?â he asks, clearly distressed. you just gave him an inch, and heâll be damned if he doesnât take a mile. he never in a million years would have thought that youâd ever reciprocate his feelings, so he canât just let them go so easily.
âi just⌠itâs just not something that i can ââÂ
âis it because iâm an android?â he questions, voice teeming with self-loathing.Â
ân-no! i mean, weâre just so different,â you tell him, trying to skirt around the topic as best as you possibly can, but he wonât have it.
âwhatever it is, iâll change it. please? i can do anything,â he pleads.Â
âitâs not like that. i want to, but we can't. i-i'll get older. i won't look the same â i won't be the same,â and itâs embarrassing as hell to admit it out loud, but you mean it. beomgyuâs urgent gaze softens, and he inches closer to you before heâs standing before you. he reaches out to gently cup your face and tenderly pushes your hair behind your ears.
âand what about me?âÂ
âwhat about you?â you scoff, but you don't pull away from his touch, though your eyes do dart away. âyouâll still be you, and iâll be old and ââÂ
âwhat about when my parts start creaking? what about when i donât remember things like iâm supposed to? youâll still love me then, right?â he asks, but he already knows, and your eyes snap back to his.
âth-thatâs different. you can get repairs. i canât ââÂ
âthen i wonât. youâll get old and gray and iâll get rundown and out-of-date. i donât care what happens, as long as iâm with you.â youâre silent in the wake of his heavy words, so he quickly continues.
âyou told me that when you love somebody, youâd do anything to be with them. you said you always find a way, and i want to find a way to be with you.â your heart simultaneously warms and aches at this sentiment.Â
you consider what it would be like to be with him. things would be difficult, yes, but not impossible. maybe youâll come to regret it someday, but you donât want to think about that right now. you feel like the luckiest girl in the world when you think of the fact that somebody so beautiful, inside and out, wants to be with you. you don't think youâve done anything particularly special for him, but he still wants and accepts you for everything that you are and ever will be.
âokay,â you say shakily, and you finally recognize that his hands are still very much cupping your face, fingers lovingly rubbing against your cheeks. he smiles in pure relief at your answer, but he makes no move to break away his hold on you.Â
you notice how his gaze flicks between your eyes and your lips, and you decide you'll have mercy on him as you lean up to him and press a chaste kiss on his pouty lips before parting. heâs visibly red at the action, and you grin at how flustered he looks. on beomgyuâs end, he feels another bloom of excitement and swell of hope threatening to overcome him. when he looks at the playfulness in your eyes, he smiles even wider.Â
âi love you,â he whispers affectionately.
you pause before you tell him:
âi love you, too, beoms.â
-
that night, beomgyu is even clingier than usual. he sticks like gum to your side. when you head to sleep, he eagerly nestles in your bed and holds his arms wide open. you follow his lead and settle into his warm embrace. he sings you one of his favorite songs youâve ever shown him. the last words you hear before you sink into sleep are:
âto die by your side
is such a heavenly way to die
to die by your side, well
the pleasure, the privilege is mineâ
notes pt. 2: sfw work ends here!
you and beomgyu have been âtogetherâ for a few weeks now, so the relationship is still very new. surprisingly or not, things seem more or less the same. you guess you never realized just how intimate you two have always been until you put a label on things. the only tangible differences are that instead of just a mere hug when he greets you, he plants kisses all over your face before finding his ways to your lips. and when youâre watching movies or even just talking, heâll steal a kiss or two. and when you head to bed, you know you can expect him to catch your lips like a man starved before you sleep. things get heated, sometimes, but they never lead to anything besides labored breaths and promises to calm himself down. you take his hesitancy as him wanting to take it slow and treasure your first time together, and you realize he still may be traumatized from the years he spent as a sexbot.Â
you have apologized to him for telling soobin his secret. you let him know your reasoning for telling him, and he accepted your apology quite graciously. honestly? he was never mad, and he tells you that very clearly, but you still feel somewhat guilty even when he says he understands. your guilt is only absolved when he says heâs thankful you told soobin because things may have never changed without his wise input. he says that heâs grateful to soobin for being a voice of reason in the face of your emotional density. you blushed when he told you this, and apologized for being so slow on the uptake, but he just assured you that he wouldnât have you any other way, which made you love him even more, somehow.Â
youâre now about to go to soobinâs again for another get together with your friends. second timeâs the charm, you cheekily told him when you brought it up, and he blushed in response. when you two walk through the doorway, everyone cheers. you greet everyone as usual, and beomgyu tries his best to keep his searing jealousy at bay, but his anxiety starts clawing at him as soobin seats himself next to you and asks you how you are.Â
you giggle and tell him youâre doing well, and he responds by updating you on his tumultuous work life. beomgyu immediately wonders why you havenât told soobin about your new relationship. are you embarrassed to be seen with him? itâs not like he doesnât understand, what with him technically being made out of wires and machinery. of course a human like you wouldnât want to be seen with a metal man like him. you could have the entire world in your hands if you wanted, so whatâs the point of playing pretend with a fake like him? maybe, if he were you, heâd be embarrassed, too. he likes to think that maybe you arenât like that, but at the end of the day, how could you not be? heâs nothing more than a robot masquerading as the real thing.Â
his anxiety worsens the more in depth your conversation with soobin gets. you try to include him by briefly giving him context about the stories soobin tells, but he canât stop himself from worrying. again, he feels like soobin is stealing you away from him, and his mood sours.Â
your other friends try to talk to him, too, but heâs very obviously in a bad mood as he watches you two continue to laugh together. when you finally do turn to beomgyu, you immediately notice how awful he looks.Â
âbeoms? are you alright?â you ask gingerly, but beomgyuâs discomfort is not at all placated even at the term of endearment.Â
ââm fine,â he mumbles, and youâre genuinely in shock at his change of attitude. soobin looks very concerned, but he excuses himself to get a drink so you two can work it out, though he has an inkling of an idea of whatâs triggering beomgyu.Â
âwhatâs wrong with you?â you ask concernedly, but he shakes his head sulkily.
âdo you wanna go home?â you offer, and he immediately nods. you look torn for a second, but when you see how sad he looks, you know you canât deny him.
you say your goodbyes to your friends and apologize for leaving early, but everyone says they understand. soobin makes you promise to host the next get together, though, to which you happily agree.Â
the ride home is mostly silent, but you look over to beomgyu in concern every so often. you grab his hand and squeeze it in a way you hope is comforting, but he doesnât look any better at all.
when you enter your house, you immediately head to your bedroom, and he follows you in silence. you sit on the bed and pat the space next to you.Â
âbeoms, whatâs the matter?â you ask pleadingly as you grab his hands, and his heart, which was previously aching, is (a little) soothed by your concern.Â
âi-itâs nothing,â he answers, but you can tell that heâs lying because of the way he refuses to make eye contact with you.Â
âbaby, i canât help you if you wonât tell me whatâs wrong,â you say. youâre right, and he knows youâre right, but youâre already doing him the favor of a lifetime just by deigning to be with him. how could he dare to ask for more? heâs ashamed at the thought, but you look so sincere, and he knows in his metaphorical heart that he needs to be able to communicate with you if you two are going to have any shot at a lasting relationship.
âi-iâm just j-jealous,â he sputters.Â
âoh, baby, why?â you ask.Â
âbecause iâm not like you,â he admits after a pause. âi already feel like iâm not good enough for you, so seeing you with someone who actually is makes me feel awful.â
âwho? soobin?â and youâre absolutely petrified when he sheepishly nods.Â
âhoney, itâs not like that at all,â you tell him. âweâre just friends, i promise.âÂ
âbut it would be so much easier to be with him. you wouldnât have to be ashamed about telling everyone youâre with an android,â he argues.Â
âbeomgyu, i am not ashamed of you. i just wasnât sure if you felt comfortable with me telling everyone. if you want me to tell them, iâll happily do it. youâre so good, how could i ever be embarrassed of you?â his eyes soften.
âdo you mean it?â he asks, and you nod.Â
âdo i not show it enough? how much i love you, i mean.â he furiously shakes his head no, but you know itâs a lie. beomgyu himself will admit that he needs more validation than most people, and itâs going to take him a while to ever get over it because of his own issues. that doesnât mean you canât try to help him, though, so you brush his cheek with your hands before wrapping your arms around his neck and pulling him in for a kiss.Â
âdoes this make you feel better?â you ask after you pull away, but he still looks somewhat depressed, so you pull him in again before pressing your lips against his. this time, you swipe your tongue on his pout, which makes him gasp. you tease your tongue against his and electricity thrums between you two when you do it. he reciprocates your enthusiasm immediately, and before long, youâre both sucking and teasing each other until youâre out of breath.
you pull away again and rest your forehead against his.Â
âbetter?â you question.
âa little,â he says. âm-maybe a little more?â you grin at his coquettishness, and you go in for another kiss. your tongues tangle, but you donât stop there. your mouth travels, peppering kisses down his jaw to his sensitive neck. he shivers at the contact when you swipe your tongue over his unmarred skin before lightly sucking. he lets out a broken moan when you do it, and it reverberates throughout your entire body and straight to your core.Â
âbetter?â you ask again.
âm-more,â he pants.Â
âanything you want, baby,â you tease before your lips hungrily capture his. one of your hands snakes its way up his shirt, and he gasps when you roll his hardened nipple between your fingers. beomgyu is more sensitive than most people, as is the nature of his model, so every little touch drives him crazy.Â
you seem to have noticed this, so when your other hand palms his hardened length through his sweatpants and he almost screams, you have to bite back a giggle.Â
âd-donât tease,â he begs, and youâd do anything for beomgyu, really, but not this time.
you palm him even more harshly and his breath catches in his throat.Â
âmore?â you ask, and he fervently nods. you oblige, sliding your hand under his waistband and teasing the sensitive skin around his length. your fingers brush against it every so often, and he involuntarily bucks every time you do.Â
âc-can i touch you?â he practically implores.
âof course, my love,â you tell him as you remove your devious hands and pull your top off before unclipping your bra.Â
his mouth waters when he sees you, and you can see him gulp almost comically as his big hands meet your breasts. he copies your movement from earlier, rolling your sensitive buds between his very clearly experienced fingers. you let out a contented sigh at the action, but you wonât let this be all about you, so your hand sneaks it way back down his pants. this time, you grab his girthy cock and give it a harsh tug. his actions stutter, and you smirk devilishly at how fucked out he is when the fun part hasnât even begun.Â
you pull at his waistband, and he eagerly tugs his pants and boxers off as soon you do it. he even goes as far as to tear his t-shirt off over his head before he pulls your half-naked body flush against his, falling onto the bed as he desperately kisses you for everything that youâre worth. eventually, he situates himself on top of you, rutting his thick, long cock onto your still clothed thigh. you didnât really get a chance to get a good look at him before, but youâre able to look down at him now, and you realize his dick is gorgeous. just like every other part of him. it stands tall, blushing profusely at the tip and practically weeping precum. itâs a bit hooked, too, no doubt to elicit the most pleasure out of his clients. your pussy is drenched just thinking about how itâll feel when itâs inside of you.
he almost rips your bottoms off of you and his mouth waters even more at the sight of your pussy, all slick and glistening in anticipation for whatâs to come.Â
âso gorgeous,â he whispers as he prepares to lay himself between your legs, but you hook them around his waist before he can do so. tonight will be all about him, youâve decided, so you tug him closer and put one of his pretty nipples in your mouth, swirling your tongue on it and occasionally nipping at the sensitive skin. your other hand continues to tweak the other one before you alternate between the two, causing him to let out a low, guttural groan.Â
eventually, he goes in for another kiss, all tongue and teeth and saliva, and you take one of your hands and harshly clench around the base of his throbbing cock.Â
âis this what you needed, beoms?â you tease, and he nods pathetically as you tug again, harder this time, and let your hands stroke all the way up to his reddened tip. your thumb glides over his slit, and heâs seeing stars.Â
âi donât know why youâre so jealous of someone else, my love. youâre so perfect,â you praise, and his ears get even redder, somehow, in spite of the situation youâre both in.
âi â nghh â i donât like when youâre with him,â he pants, in spite of everything you're doing to him. âonly want you with me.â
âoh, baby, you have me,â you coo. âalways.â and with that, you begin to feverishly jerk him off with one hand while the other returns to his nipple. his hips buck with every movement, and his eyes are screwed shut. you can tell heâs about to come before you completely take your hands off of him.Â
ân-no! w-why?â he asks with a crack in his voice, watery eyes shooting open at the sudden action.
âdonât you wanna come in my pussy, instead? itâs warmer and wetter than my hand,â you ask with faux innocence with a tilt of your head, and his previously aggrieved demeanor morphs back into pure lust.Â
âthatâs what i thought,â you giggle as you grab his length and rub it against your slickness. he groans at the feeling, but you donât immediately take him in, opting to instead roll your hips up, just barely letting his flared head catch against your entrance.Â
âbaby, please,â he whines, and with a smirk, you finally wrap your legs around his waist and line him up with your entrance. you just barely take the tip in, easing it into your pussy, before you force him out again. he gasps raggedly at how tight you are, and heâs wound up so much, he feels like heâs on the brink of exploding. heâs about to take matters into his own hands before you guide him back inside of you, and he feels your walls struggling to accommodate him.Â
âs-so tight! h-how are you so tight?â he hisses, eyes reddened and face strained, but youâre far too busy with the euphoric feeling of him finally inside of you to reply. he eases in inch after throbbing inch, and it is a snug fit, indeed. he almost wonders if heâll even fit, but though the stretch burns you, the pleasure is too great to ignore. finally, your walls slightly relax, and heâs able to completely sheath himself in you. you both moan as his tip pulsates against your cervix, and he considerately gives you time to adjust, walls contracting wildly around him, before he attempts to pull out and really begin.Â
âstop,â you command before he can do so, and his eyes fill with worry at your words.Â
âw-whatâs wrong?â he stutters.Â
âoh, nothing,â you say between pants. âi just want to see how long you can last.âÂ
âw-what do you ââ
and you interrupt him with a kiss. he ravenously reciprocates it, and he canât help but unconsciously thrust his hips, tapping deliciously on the deepest parts of you, but you prevent him from ever fully pulling out. you tangle one of your hands through his hair and grip it â not hard enough to hurt, but enough to make him groan into your mouth.Â
âc-can i move?â he pleads, but you shake your head no.Â
âwhy?â he whimpers, but you just smirk as you kiss him again and bite his bottom lip.Â
he doesnât know how long you two stay like that, but itâs far too long for his liking. he feels his dick swell, and you still refuse to let him move, but you teasingly scrape your fingers against his balls and itâs all he can do not to come.Â
âp-please let me move, it hurts,â he cries, tears now flowing from his eyes. for once, sex is all about beomgyu and what feels good to him. he could cry just from the sentiment alone, but his current tears are the direct result of how youâre teasing him.
âand where does it hurt, baby? use your words, i know you can.âÂ
âh-hurts, my c-cock hurts,â he sputters out.Â
âand would pounding my pussy make you feel better?â you goad, and he whines even louder at the imagery.Â
ây-yes,â he sobs, and you smile as you say your next words.
âsuch a good boy. you can move.â and thatâs all it takes, really, before heâs pulling out despite your cuntâs attempts to suck him back in, and ramming himself back inside of you again and again.
the curve of his cock hits places previously untouched, and your walls spasm around him at the sensation.
âdoes it feel good, beoms?âÂ
âs-so good,â he mumbles as drool pools off of his tongue and out of his mouth, eyes rolling to the back of his head. âso warm and t-tight.â you clench against your will at his filthy words, and it makes a strangled cry leave his throat.Â
âpussy so good, baby. your pussy is the b-best,â he babbles, and your lips meet his again before your mouth travels down, sucking a blooming hickey onto his neck. he trembles at the pain that comes with the pleasure, but somehow, he still has the presence of mind to roll his skilled fingers against your clit. just a few touches, and you already feel your orgasm approaching. he can feel every spasm of yours, and it makes his dick twitch inside of you as he wildly fucks you open.Â
heâs drilling into you so hard, you have to dig your fingernails into the skin of his back to keep yourself grounded. with each thrust, you feel more and more like youâre about to burst.Â
âgonna come!â you whine.Â
âdo it, baby. c-come all over my cock,â he pleads.
âcome inside? want it so bad,â you mewl.
âof course, my angel. a-anything for you,â he tells you as he tenderly brushes your hair out of your sweaty face, and he hammers himself into you at an inhuman pace as you feel the pressure in you crescendo into a searing hot orgasm. you clench even tighter around him while you come, gripping him so forcefully he can barely pull out, so his thrusts become sloppy and uncoordinated before he rams himself into you one last time and paints your inner walls with his cum.
you two stay like that for a while, just panting and basking in the feeling of closeness you feel. he presses a kiss on your forehead as he relaxes his arms and lays on top of you. you giggle at the intimacy and he finds himself sharing your laughter, your joy.Â
âyouâre so beautiful,â he says between breaths, nuzzling his face into your neck and sighing. âi love you.â
âi love you, too, beoms,â you tell him, and you do love him. unconditionally.
notes pt. 3: :,) :,) :,)))))) i'm very sorry if this was disappointing but i hope it was worth it! i would love to hear your thoughts or answer any questions you may have about this fic/universe. feedback is needed to a disgusting degree bc i need validation to survive #sorry
[taglist]
permanent (sfw/[n]sfw): @my313 @lonelybutterflytae @cherrycolaberry @midwinterblizzard @everythingvirgoes @sooberryworld @20-cms @inkigayocamman @hyueika @boba-beom @vicurious28 @blossommi @lickingan0rchid @katsukis1wife @binniebakery @notevenheretbh1 @shymexican @that1sadgrl @archoive @paegesoobin @buttercreamerie @ifwtxt @softesyoongi @serenityism00 @fairfootedflekk @kyanmeai @definitelynotherr @hyunj00 @taehyunluvrs @m00gyu @denleave1088 @hwanghyunjinismybae @bmo-bri
an iron man: @beomieboi @eunwoo-headquarters @theresstardustinmyblood @prince-jjae @kodzukengaming @va1ry @explosiveyogurt @run4gyu @luv-joonie
if you want to join any of my taglists, please join here!
#niningtori#an iron man#txt smut#beomgyu smut#beomgyu fic#txt fic#beomgyu x reader#txt x reader#beomgyu x you#txt x you#txt angst#beomgyu angst#beomgyu hard thoughts#beomgyu hard hours#txt hard thoughts#txt hard hours#nini's hard hours#sub!idol
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I wanna write a silly post about my husband but my brain is way too tiiired.. hmmph...
#âł the fool speaks#which husband. you may ask.#or not bc idk if anyone genuinely cares about my f/os#the m.ha one. I've been having more memories of being kao lately and i wish i could hug him bwehh..#and YES i am avoidibg saying hjs name bc I'm blushing like a school girl writing this. i rhink i need to go to sleep. but i dont wanna >:T
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Ëâşď˝ĄËâËprivate, not a secret | MV1Ëâşď˝ĄËâË
pairing: max verstappen x wife!reader y/n (she/her)
genre: social media au, established/secret relationship
warnings: very fluffy :))
summary: in which you and your husband like to keep things on the low so much so that none of his fans know about the family you have together
a/n: i luv this req tbh i lowkey luv writing kids in it's sooo cute im lowkey broody af atm too đ helllll
request!!!: Hi!! Could I request an smau with max where he has a secret family or something idk I just think it could be really cute !
fc: various blonde girls from pinterest
my masterlist
twitter ->
instagram ->
yourusername
liked by maxverstappen1, carlossainz55, and others
yourusername my beautiful life
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maxverstappen1 my girls
yourusername đ
carlossainz55 god i look so cool
yourusername hahahhh yeaaa
carlossainz55 ???
yourusername nothing mateđ
yourbff aww i need to come see you guys
yourusername yes please omg đ§ alice said she misses her fav aunt !
only accounts that follow yourusername may see this post
messages ->
instagram ->
maxverstappen1
liked by yourusername, danielricciardo, and 88,928 others
maxverstappen1 beach day
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user7 omg hi y/n
user8 YES A Y/N FEATURE
user9 omg he let her out of the basement
user10 đ
danielricciardo go off
maxverstappen1 yessss!!! whatever that means
user11 lol
charles_leclerc tell y/n we want her at the next race please
maxverstappen1 she will come if the babysitter is free đ
*comment deleted by maxverstappen1*
maxverstappen1 she said she'll think about it đ§
user12 WHAT
user13 Urmmmmmmm did you guys see the deleted comment
user14 do max & y/n have children?
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yourusername let's ignore max's deleted comment slip up shall we
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charles_leclerc i am sorry on his behalf y/n đ
yourusername hahah dont worry about it charlie
oscarpiastri get him on a time out asap
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yourbff aww the world deserves to know about little alice
yourusername they will soon we're keeping her childhood safe for now
maxverstappen1 you already know she's gonna come watch her dad race soon đ
yourbff im sure she'll find that very fun max
yourusername hahah that's what i said
maxverstappen1 đ
only accounts that follow yourusername may see this post
interview ->
transcript (sorry if it's hard to readđ) ->
there is always going to be rumours ahout my relationship considering we keep things to ourselves, neither of us find it necessary to comment on them very often. *laughs* i've never heard anyone say i'm hiding y/n, no. we have always been private but never ever a secret and that's how it will remain for the most part
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maxverstappen1 a small insight into our (family) life
tagged: yourusername
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user21 NOOOO WAYYYYY
user22 this is so so so so precious
user23 omg i feel so honoured that this is being shared with us even tho it's only a small piece of their lives đŤś
user24 max being a girl dad JUST MAKES SENSE
liked by yourusername
yourusername i love you!!
maxverstappen1 i love you more â¤ď¸
user25 this is so special
charles_leclerc love you guys
liked by maxverstappen1, yourusername
danielricciardo congratulations again bro you have a such a beautiful family
maxverstappen1 thank you daniel đ
twitter ->
instagram ->
yourusername
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yourusername this account will never go public gang dont worry!! especially because im pregnant again đ¤Ť
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oscarpiastri omg congratulations y/n
maxverstappen1 and me?
oscarpiastri oh right yea sorry max forgot, congratulations mate
danielricciardo congratulations guys đŤś
liked by yourusername, maxverstappen1
charles_leclerc so so happy for you guys
yourusername â¤ď¸â¤ď¸â¤ď¸
yourbff 𤰠ur glowing
yourusername i heart you
maxverstappen1 you are so beautiful
yourusername stop it you im blushing
maxverstappen1 i love making you blush
yourusername i love you
maxverstappen1 i love you my girl đ
only accounts that follow yourusername may see this post
THE END â¤ď¸
#f1#f1 fanfic#f1 smau#f1 fic#f1 x reader#smau#f1 imagine#max verstappen#mv33#mv1#mv1 imagine#mv1 x reader#mv33 x reader#mv33 imagine#mv33 fic#mv1 fic#maddie's smau
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patience running thin; jacaerys velaryon
pairing: jacaerys velaryon x f!reader
summary: 'You two were to be wed by the weekâs end. He was getting impatient. You were both getting impatient.'
word count: 1.3k
warnings: nsfw, 18+, smut, MINORS DNI, porn w/o plot, somewhat canon compliant, hot HOT make out, fingering, hair pulling, groping, high valyrian used w translation (if it is wrong i obviously don't know hv please forgive me), jacaerys is feral.
a/n: i had to write and publish something about jace pronto i hope everyone enjoys! i may write a part 2 đ (this is so minimally proofread it is 1am)
READ PART TWO HERE
âWhat are you doing here my love?â You said as Jacaerys walked you into your bedchamber and shut your door with his foot.
His eyebrows furrowed. âWhat can I not see my betrothed?â Jace leaned down crashing his lips upon yours. He needed this every day. Feeling your lips against his helped center him during this crazy war. He wrapped his arms around your back pulling you completely against him.
You two were to be wed by the weekâs end. He was getting impatient. You were both getting impatient. Heâs wanted nothing more than to be inside of you since the date was set. Every time you two went to share a kiss there was nothing but heat behind it, a simple peck would lead to deeper kisses. Pushed against walls. Hands anywhere they could reach. Hushed moans drowned out by kisses.
He brought his hands from around you to cup your face and yours went to unpin his cloak. It fell to the floor alongside his sheathed sword they both fell and a loud clank resonated around the room.
âI missed you today.â Jacaerys ran his nose from behind your ear down to your collarbone. Taking in your scent. A warm vanilla, he could moan at your smell alone. You had just had your nightly bath.
He walked you towards your bed until the two of you fell on top of your bed cover. He kneeled over you, his mouth was all over your neck and the parts of your chest that were exposed.
Your hands were entangled in his exquisite curls. Gasps and moans left your mouth. You spread your legs and he ran his hand up one, piling your dress around your waist.
âI do not think I can keep my honor intact much longer,â Jace spoke his hand entirely too close to your small clothes.
You let out small gasps reaching your head towards him, wanting nothing more than to grasp his lips yet again.
âJacaerys.â You whined desperately against his lips. âI cannot wait.â
He groaned and pulled away from you shaking his head. âDo not say that.â He sat on the backs of his legs looking down at you. âI cannot hear that. We marry in less than four days and every day we get closer, I am finding my honor on a very very thin line. I cannot be in control of what happens if I hear that.â
âDoes it really count as dishonor when we marry so soon?â You smiled.
âWe cannot.â He began to look at your frame. He could see your hard nipples through the thin material of your sleepwear. Looking at your beautiful legs. All the way up to where your dress was just barely covering your most intimate area. You looked so beautiful in front of him.
âWe can.â You sat up running your hands up his chest. âAnd you are wearing too many clothes.â
âWe canno-.â
âJacaerys! Do something, please. Anything Iâll take anything youâll give me⌠please.â You couldnât take it anymore. These past few weeks, youâve become touch starved for your soon-to-be husband. But touched starved in a place you have never felt him. Between the promiscuous kisses against walls in empty corridors. To the heated make-outs in each other beds. It was simply too much for you. You couldnât handle it anymore.
You saw something flash in Jaceâs eyes at your words. He was on you in seconds. Pulling your night dress down just enough to see the swell of your breasts. âI do not wish to spoil myself of your entirety before we are vowed to each other. I wish not to ruin the anticipation. To see my wife in all of her glory.â
You moaned at his words. He took your lips, pushing you back down on the bed, moaning into your mouth. He was kneeling over you. Your hands were tangled in his hair. This was all too much for both of you.
His cock screaming for release inside of his tight pants. You felt your stomach twisting in such delight. Your skin was ablaze, feeling his hands and mouth all over you. He brought his mouth down to the tops of your breasts, groping one through your clothes with his slender hands.
âJa-Jacaerys. More. Please.â You struggled to get out through gasps and groans.
Jacaerys pulled his mouth away from your breast. He dragged his hand down from your breast slowly down your side till it was past your dress and going up the inner side of your thigh.
You felt your breath get stuck in a lump in your throat as you anticipated his next move. His eyes never left yours. Beautiful browns. So deep right now they almost looked like were brown mixed with blood red.
He brought his other hand down with him to pull your thin undergarments off of your body. His body had a visceral reaction to the smell of your arousal, which filled his nose as soon as he removed your small clothes. âAo jÄhor sagon se morghon hen issa.â You will be the death of me.
You not being of Targaryen blood, you did not understand what he just said. But him speaking the ancient language of High Valyrian did something to you. âJace.â You whined.
Jacaerys brought his finger forward rubbing it through you wet folds. You jerked when his finger lightly touched your clit.
His eyes sparked mischievously, âDo you find that pleasurable, my love.â You mewled when he circled his finger over it. âIâll take that as a yes.â
He continued to play with your clit as you threw your hand to the back of his head, rocking your hips against his finger. You whispered in his ear that you needed him to put it inside of you.
He quickly slipped his index finger inside of you and groaned at your tightness. He began to pump his finger. All he could do was look at you in pure awe. Your breasts struggled to free themselves as you arched your back at the pleasure. Sweat droplets pilling up on your forehead. Your mouth was wide open as you let out wanton moans and cries of his name.
âOh, you are perfect. Please look at me.â Jacaerys spoke when he curled his index finger inside of you, trying to see what made you tick. Looks like he hit it right on the spot. He couldnât help but smirk, feeling a bit arrogant.
You opened your eyes as you let out a loud whimper. Jace immediately crashed his lips to yours in an open mouth kiss full of tongue and spit and lust. He pulled away, keeping his finger curling into the soft spot inside of you.
You looked down at the tent in his pants and couldnât stop yourself from reaching your hand out to touch your prince but he immediately protested.
âIf you touch me there that line of honor I have will snap. Do you rea-,â Jacaerys began before he was cut off by a knock at your door. Jacaerys stopped what he was doing and looked at you with wide eyes. âTell them to go.â He leaned down and whispered against your lips.
âI am feeling a bit unwell. Please could this wait till the morning?â Jace smiled at you and then took your lips again. His hand resumed its actions as well.
âLittle prince, I know youâre in there. Your mother is waiting for you at the painted table.â
Both of your faces blanched as you recognized no one other than Daemon Targaryen on the outside of the door.
Jacaerys removed his finger from inside of you and you hissed. He gave you a quick kiss before getting out of your bed to straighten himself up.
After he donned his cloak again, he gave you another kiss. âI will see you in the morning, Princess.â
You smiled at him as he helped get you situated under your covers. He was out the door before you could help him fix his hair. You laughed at the thought.
READ PART TWO HERE
#jacaerys velaryon#jacaerys velaryon smut#jacaerys velaryon x reader#jacaerys velaryon fanfic#jacaerys targaryen#house of the dragon#hotd
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what love feels like ŕź myg (m)
â Summary: Being a mother to a beautiful baby girl and wife to an adoring husband is the most rewarding feeling in the world. But you also work a full-time job, are overtired most of the time, stressed, don't have any alone time, look very different than eight years ago, and sex? Well, that hasnât happened in weeks. The gravity of the situation weighs on you until one day, all of your deepest insecurities rear their ugly headâthat your husband might not love you as much anymore and someone could take him away from you.
Pairing: husband!yoongi x reader
AU/genre: angst, fluff, smut, marriage au
Rating: M, 18+
Word Count: 6.7k+
Warnings: swearing, both Yoongi and oc are in their 30s, mom and full-time worker!oc, reserved!dad!yoongi, lack of intimacy, mentions of body insecurities post-pregnancy, mentions of fear of abandonment, mentions of jealousy. irrational worries, built-up stress, light fighting, silent treatment, stubbornness, lots of reassurance, nightmares, cute backstory of how they met, a lot of ily, Yoongi and oc being good parents đĽš, Yoongi calls oc doll, and explicit sexual content
sexual warnings: swearing, kissing, neck kisses, pleading, banter, dirty talk, doll petname, asking for consent, b**b squeezing & sucking, hair threading, penetration, f*ngering, big d*ck!yoongi, growling, missi*nary, eye contact, tearing up, c*ming together
Now Playing: Breathing by Anne Marie
a/n: Okay this was for Yoon's bday. Based on the poll, husband!Yoon won. Was intended to be a Drabble but well...heh đ
Anyway, I had a lot of fun writing this fic and Yoon is just such a good hubby for responding well to these very relatable insecurities. (Low-key love this couple...) I'm sorry for any typos or warnings i missed! I checked and double checked but a few might have slipped. Enjoy! Anyway please enjoy! đĽ°
âSo, you're Jia's father, huh? I donât think I've seen you here before, and Iâm sure I would have recognized you.â
With his back straight and arms folded, Yoongi gives the woman in front of him a quick once-over. Mid-40s, freshly single, and definitely in need of some companionship. It doesnât take a genius to figure out; sheâs been talking his ear off for the past twenty minutes like heâs some kind of remedy to all her problems.
Honestly, he just swung by to pick up his four-year-old from daycare after another grueling day at work. But the moment he walked in, it was as if all the single moms latched onto him like a flock of hungry geese. This oneâs name is Sandra in particular.
It reminds him of his college basketball days, how the cheerleaders all too eagerly swarmed around him after sinking the winning shot at the championship game. Shame he was too busy eyeing the girl in the stands to care, her face buried behind a book twice as big as her head. Who reads an 800-page novel during the playoffs anyway?
Fate, as one may call it, intervened about a week later when his best friend became said girlâs lab partner. Yoongi didnât make any sudden moves at first, but well, he did make her his wife three years later.
âItâs just so nice to finally meet the father of such a sweet child. Especially considering how many dads tend to take a backseat in their child's early years.â Is she still going on? Yoongi does his best to stay present, though itâs proving unsuccessful. âAnd Jia truly is an angel! Itâs clear youâre doing a wonderful job raising her, even with a full-time job and all.â
Yoongiâs eyebrows knit together at the somewhat odd choice of words. âThanks,â he drawls out, noticing her pupils dilating with every breath. âMost of the credit goes to my wife though. Sheâs a great mom to Jia.â
âJiaâs m-mom?â Sandra stutters, her mouth slightly agape. Yoongi senses the gears turning in her head as she struggles to process the unexpected presence of his wife. Tempting as it is, he holds down a smirk. Of course, heâs a happily married manâfor nearly eight years now.
âYeah,â he replies simply. âSheâs usually the one to pick up our daughter from daycare, but sheâs been working a lot of overtime lately. I thought I'd come instead so she can get some rest."
âOh, well thatâs veryââ
âDaddy! Daddy, youâre here!â The sound of a familiar high-pitched voice, along with a light pattering of feet, diverts both adultâs attention.
âHey kid.â Yoongi effortlessly lifts the small child once in front of him, securing her in his arms. âHave fun today?â
Jia gives an enthusiastic nod, bright red ribbons in her hair bouncing cutely as she does. Proudly, she shows him the drawing she made.
âSee? Itâs me, you, and mommy!â She makes sure to point to each part of the picture with her pointer finger.
Yoongi gently takes the artwork from his daughterâs hand and lets out a soft chuckle. âNow this is what I call a masterpiece! Mommyâs gonna love hanging this one on the fridge. How about I hold onto this and you go grab your backpack, okay?â
As soon as Jiaâs feet touch the carpeted floor again, she races off to her cubby in the far corner of the room. Yoongi shoots Sandra a final glance before slowly following behind. âWe got to get going, but nice meeting you.â
âYouâŚtoo.â Sandraâs response is more than disappointed as she watches the father-daughter duo make their way out of the building. Evidently, Min Yoongi isnât the single dad she originally assumed. Funny, she swore there wasnât a wedding band in sight. Maybe she missed it.
âNo, Iâm sorry but Iâm certain we havenât used any of your services in the last six months. My husband canceled it in late October.â
With one hand, you grip your cell phone up to an ear while the other pops open the dishwasher. Youâve been on the phone with the cable company for half an hour, trying to make sense of an unexpected charge that appeared on your bank account this morning. You consider yourself more patient than most, yet after working all day, a pile of laundry waiting to be washed, and dinner threatening to burn on the stove, the last thing you have time for is arguing with your old service provider.
âI understand, maâam, and I apologize for any confusion. Iâm taking a look at my records and theyâre all showing me thatâoh wait a second.â
The young man on the opposite end of the line interrupts his own thought, piquing your concern in the process.
âWhat did you say your last name is?â
You answer and in an instant, youâre met with a thousand rushed apologies; something about getting the account names mixed up in their system. Itâs difficult to decipher everything you hear with the front door being thrust open that very moment.
âMommy, where are you? Weâre home!â Your daughter not so subtly announces her presence from the foyer. She kicks off her shoes, hangs her backpack on the designated wall hook, and then rushes to the kitchen upon catching a brief glimpse of your shirt.
âItâs alright, these mistakes happen.â You hang up the call and turn around to find Jia only steps away, a big goofy grin on her face. Infectious, you break out into a smile yourself and swoop her up.
âHey honey, I missed you so much!â You kiss the side of your daughterâs head as she wraps her small arms around your neck. âYou look so pretty with all these ribbons in your hair! Daddy did a good job, didnât he?â
Being that you were called into work earlier than usual this morning, Yoongi was the one who got Jia dressed and ready for daycare. Youâre delightfully surprised by the results.
âMmhm,â Jia nods, twirling a couple of strands of hair between her thumb and forefinger. âBut Daddy pulls too much!â
âMaybe if someone had listened and stopped fussing when I told her, I wouldnât have accidentally yanked on her hair when I was reaching for her favorite Hello Kitty scrunchie.â Yoongi joins you both in the kitchen, walking over to press a quick peck on your lips while tenderly caressing the small of your back. The gesture soothes you of your earlier frustrations. âWho was that on the phone? Cable company?â
âYeah, they canceled the charge. Wrong account.â As you reiterate the entire mix-up, your eyes wander all over your husband. Heâs especially handsome tonight, given his perfectly tousled black hair and navy blue blazer flowing over his body. Itâs tastefully oversized with a clean, white top paired underneath. You, on the other hand, are sporting a raggedy old t-shirt and stained sweatpants.
There was a time when you used to put a shit ton more effort into your appearance. It was before you got pregnant with Jia, back when you and Yoongi were going out on weekly dates. Neither of you has that kind of time anymore, or energy for that matter. You didnât believe the other moms when they told you the romance takes a nose dive after you have your first kid. Yet here you are, proven wrong again.
Being parents to a beautiful baby girl is likely the most rewarding feeling in the world for you and Yoongi. You donât remember the last time the two of you got real quality alone time though. And sex? Well, that hasnât happened in weeks. The gravity of the situation weighs more on you with each passing day to be honest. Sure, youâre not the same person you used to be eight years ago, but shouldnât you and Yoongi still make time for at least a little intimacy?
âHow was picking up Jia by the way?â You look at Yoongi who merely shrugs nonchalantly in response.
âIt was fine. Nothing too out of the ordinary,â Yoong gives you another peck before heading up the stairs to your bedroom. âIâm gonna go get changed. Why donât you show Mommy the drawing you did Jia?â
âA drawing?â You shift your attention to your daughter whose eyes sparkle like diamonds upon mention. âWe should put it up on the fridge then. Letâs take a look hmm?â
âItâs in my backpack! My new friend and I were drawing together. Her name is Mi-Sun.â Jia continues telling you all about her friend Mi-Sun as you make your way to the front door where her backpack hangs. Youâre fully engaged until the very end. âDaddy made a new friend too!â she joyously claps her hands together, not realizing the depth of her remark.
âOh, whoâs Daddyâs new friend honey?â You ask, staying as calm as possible.
âMs. Cho! They were talking for a really long time today.â
Ms. Cho? You think back to all the moms youâve met at daycare. Somehow you canât recall ever hearing or meeting a Ms. Cho. She must be a single mom, you deduce. Was she new? What did she look like? And why didnât Yoongi mention her when you asked?
This has to be nothing but a little small talk, an acquaintance at most. Besides, the moms at Jiaâs daycare are quite a chatty bunch and Yoongi wouldnât dare overstep any boundaries.
âDo you know what they were talking about?â You donât enjoy asking your child for details about your husband, yet you canât seem to help it this time.
âI dunno,â she shrugs her shoulders. "Daddy was laughing a lot."
Suddenly, the self-assurance you gave yourself earlier slips away; seemingly useless given the queasy feeling building in the pit of your stomach.
For the remainder of the night, you purposely dodge every attempt your husband makes to kiss, touch, and hold you. Youâve even begun responding to his questions in one-word answers and at times, with nothing at all.
Yes, youâre being petty; more than usual. The silent treatment frustrates Yoongi to no end and it isnât very mature of you, but neither is refusing to tell your wife that some single mom was flirting with you in front of your kid! Okay, so maybe that's an exaggeration. Maybe it all sums up to a harmless conversation, but itâs not like you know either way with Yoongi being as reserved as he is. It brings you back to your early dating days when he wouldnât think to tell you about various aspects of his day; who he ate breakfast with that morning or the one classmate of his that wouldnât leave him alone for two semesters.
Truth be told, you're simply hoping that your husband will bring up the topic first, without having to be the classic nagging wife. Youâre a jealous person by nature so itâs not a simple task. Even now as you fold the first batch of laundry on your shared bed, him on the other side doing the same, you struggle to keep from blurting everything out.
âSo,â Yoongi fluffs up a clean pillowcase before sliding it onto one of the bed pillows. âHow was work?â
What a basic question, you grumble internally. Is that all heâs got? âWas okay,â you reply. âThe usual.â
âYou must be tired from the day. Did you get to lie down at all?â Yoongi picks up another pillowcase, repeating the process as before. When he glances your way, itâs clear somethingâs on your mind. Youâve started pairing Jiaâs socks far more aggressively than normal and youâre holding back your responses. âDid you hear me, doll? Or am I going deaf here?â The sarcastic chuckle distracts you from your task, forcing your attention.
Youâre about to respond when your eyes briefly flicker down to his hands, his left one in particular. Where's his wedding ring? Yoongi always wears it no matter what. The same sick feeling from before returns tenfold. No wonder that Ms. Cho was all over himâshe must have thought he was single.
âNo, I didnât get to lie down Yoongi. I worked all day, came home and made dinner, called the cable guy to get that stupid bill figured out, and now Iâm doing the second load of laundry. Iâm really just not in the mood to chat.â It comes out a blur as you snatch the empty laundry basket and head for your washer and dryer, your eyes welling up with tears.
â__, wait.â Yoongi tosses the last pillow near the headboard and stops you in your tracks, his hand firmly gripping one end of the laundry basket. The intensity of his stare softens as he speaks. âI'm sorry if it seems like I'm forcing you to talk. I know you've been losing a lot of sleep recently between work, Jia, and upkeeping the house. We just don't get a lot of time to see each other anymore and I miss youâŚI miss talking to you."
With every ounce of self-control remaining, you hold back any tears that risk spilling out. You don't know why you're acting like this, why you're crying over something that seems so small and insignificant to the rest of the world. Yoongi loves you. He's said it a million times and proven it to you over and over again, for eight years now. He wouldnât cheat on you, yet you still get so worked up about the idea that someone could take him away from you. Someone half your age, more attractive, or hell even the opposite sex if it means fewer dark circles under their eyes.
"Why- why aren't you wearing your ring?" Your naturally confident voice dwindles to the whisper of a mouse. It's completely out of character, nevertheless, here you are.
"I..." Your husband's voice wavers. His gaze flickers to his left hand, where his ring should be, but isn't. "Shit...I took it off in the shower this morning," he confesses, frustrated by his forgetfulness. "I was in such a rush to get Jia to daycare, and me to work, that it completely slipped my mind. I'm sorryâI fully intended to put it back on." He pauses, then perks up. "It's still in the bathroom. I'll be right back, okay?"
You watch as he makes a beeline for the master bathroom, eager to rectify the situation as soon as possible. You should have kept silent what you say next, but you don't.
"No wonder the moms at Jia's daycare were so drawn to you."
"What?" Yoongi stops in his tracks. The dumbfounded expression on his face tells you that you've caught him off guard again.
"Jia told me about someone named Ms. Cho," you reluctantly continue. "The two of you were laughing and talking andâ"
"Baby, don't worry about that." Seizing his chance, your husband walks back over to you and sneakily pulls the laundry basket from under your arm. He sets it on the ground after, then reaches to take your hand in his, but stubbornly you cross your arms.
"Her name's Sandra," he starts explaining. "She's a new mom at the daycare and she didn't know anyone, so she started talking to me. I got the sense she was a little overly friendly but it was all small talk, nothing more."
Still largely unsatisfied, you remain unmoved. "If it wasn't a big deal then why didn't you tell me earlier?"
"Because nothing serious happened. The majority of the conversation was her venting about her ex-husband and me wishing you were right there next to me. Please believe me. All I could think about was finally being able to come home to you after a long week with Jia in our arms."
"Really?" Well, now you're feeling guilty for avoiding him in nearly every way tonight. Guilty for believing such wild assumptions that he'd leave you for someone else over one measly conversation. Guilty for letting yourself get so worked up over a situation you, quite frankly, knew few details about.
"I mean it doll." This time, when he reaches out to grasp your wrist, he succeeds. He intertwines his fingers with yours and leads you to the edge of your bed, gently pulling you down to sit on his lap. "Do you really think I could look at anyone else the way I look at you? Or think about you the way I have for the last eight-plus years we've been married and known each other?"
You hesitate your answer, averting his eye contact. "I know butâŚ"
"No, don't finish that. Look at me," he intercepts. "You and our daughter are the only women on my mindâ24/7. I can't get either of you out of my head and I don't want to. I'm so sorry I forgot to put my wedding band back on this morning, and again tonight. I feel awful about it and I'll be more careful from now on. And another thing, when Sandra and I were talking I mentioned you multiple times. So, it's clear to her that I'm a happily married man."
The last bit of information manages to perk your ears. "You talked about me?" Your eyes widen as you finally shift your full attention to him. Yoongi eyes widen with you, amused by your sudden change of heart to look at him.
"I said my wife is an amazing mother, works too hard for her own good, and needed to rest today. Give or take a few words."
That's all? You huff to yourself. Would it been nice if your husband also thrown in that you were beautiful or stunning in that mix of compliments? Yes, yes it would haveâagain, you're pettiness clouds your better judgment. You're not as pissed off as before, but rather semi-irritated.
"OkayâŚwell I guess it's fine then. I'm sorry for being short with you earlier. I shouldn't have made those rash conclusions about the ring and that woman from the daycare. It wasn't reasonable of me." You get up from his lap, yet Yoongi isn't entirely convinced that you're okay.
"There's still something you're not telling me. I can tell."
"No, there's nothing else." You waive him off, placing your hand on your bedroom doorknob "You told her you had a wife so it's fine. I need to switch the second load of laundry.â
"Come on, doll. Let's not leave things unsaid now."
Sighing at his plead, you find yourself giving into all your repressed thoughts and emotions. It swallows you up, like a tidal wave you can't stop. "Look at me Yoon. I'm sweaty, I have dark circles under my eyes, stretch marks, love handles, my hair's a mess, and all I wear are old sweats covered in stains. I'm nothing like I used to be! No wonder we aren't intimate anymore."
Yoongi rises from the bed at once, offended by the sudden digression. "Is that what this is all about? Itâs not even about that single mom from daycare is it?" The truth of the matter sinks in as he speaks.
"I guess maybe soâŚthough I'm still annoyed about that too." Great, you're back to square one again.
"Come with me, I need to show you something." Your husband gestures you to follow him, which you slowly concede to.
"What are you doing Yoon?" You both walk into the master bathroom, stopping in front of the large mirror above the sink.
"I'm showing you the woman I'm in love with and have been in love with for nearly eight years now. Sweats and all." Yoongi makes you face the mirror directly, hands around your shoulders. You have trouble stomaching the sight.
"Yoongi please, I can't. The laundry ringing off." You avoid looking into the mirror and make a move to leave the bathroom.
"Just stay with me a minute, please?" Your husband refuses to loosen his hold on you, turning your body so you're looking eye to eye. "No, you're not the same person as you were and neither am I. We're parents to a beautiful daughter now, who we love and adore. We're also overtired 90% of the time, juggling a million things at once. But there's one thing you can count on to always stay the sameâmy loyalty to you. I'll always be in love with you __, no matter what age you are or however way you look. There's nothing you can do to change that, so why fight it?"
Dammit. A single tear rolls down your cheek as you take in his heart-melting speech. It's not his words alone, it's the sincerity behind them. How he's repeated similar countless times before throughout your entire relationship.
"I love you, Yoon..." you choke out the words, composure fleeting.
"I love you so much, doll." He wipes the wetness of your tear with his thumb. "As far as us not being as intimate anymore, that's my fault. I don't ever want you to feel like I don't desire you every day. Why don't we send the kid to my parents this weekend and let me start making things right hmm?"
"I don't know if we can this weekend. Jia has a playdate on Saturday."
"So, I'll ask Mom to take her. She'll be happy to, trust me. We can finally watch that movie you've been dying to show me since what? December?"
"You're serious?" Your eyes light up at the mention of what is essentially a movie date. The show Yoongi's referring to is one you've been craving to see for months, yet neither of you has found the time to watch. "I've been talking about it for so long, Yoon."
"I know you have, it's why I suggested it. I've been wanting to watch it too with all the trailers you keep sending me. Plus, I'll be able to keep my beautiful wife in my arms for over two hours. That's a lot for us, especially with you being such a busy bee. I can never get you to light in one place! What's up with that, huh?"
Feeling your natural self re-emerging, you throw a playful swat to his arm and scowl at his teasing comment. "You're one to talk! You're basically a workaholic! Besides, you knew who you were marrying when you met me."
Yoongi chuckles and brings both hands to cup your cheeks, squishing them slightly. "A cutie who reads 800-page novels at a basketball game?"
"Stop babying me!" You pull his hands off your cheeks and rub them, trying to regain some composure. "I don't regret my choices, I like books. It's why I'm such a boss at work!"
"Okay, boss," he laughs. "What about what I suggested before then? I can call Mom tomorrow and ask her if she could watch Jia for the day. She'll take her to her playdate, then they can spend the rest of the day together."
It does sound nice, having the whole day with your husband.
"Okay," you agree. "Let's try."
"Good." Yoongi slides his hands down to your hips and pulls you flush against his chest. "How about we seal it with a kiss now?" You nod and he leans his head down, pressing an amazing, tender kiss to your lips. It makes you both giddy on queue.
"Read one more story, Daddy!" Jia leaps off her small, twin bed and bounds for her bookshelf. She lets out a series of giggles when a large pair of hands catch her, lifting her high into the air.
"I already read you three books kid," Yoongi says, planting a kiss on her cheek. "Bedtime." He then tucks her into her fluffy comforter, plugs in her teddy bear nightlight, and closes her bedroom door.
The next second, Jia comes running out of her room, latching onto his right leg. "I don't wanna go to bed. I wanna play!" Figures she'd be hyper at this hour.
Yoongi sighs and picks her up. "Daddy told you to go to sleep, it's not playtime. You'll have lots of time for that tomorrow when you get to see your friend." He then carries her into her room, yet she fusses in his arms; thumping her tiny fists into his chest.
"No, no, no, Daddy. I want to play!"
Sighing, Yoongi looks at his child with sharp eyes. "Jiaâ"
"Hey," you interrupt, entering your daughter's bedroom upon hearing the commotion down the hall. "What's going on?"
"Kid doesn't want to go to bed."
You give an empathetic look and saunter over to the pair, gently taking Jia into your arms. Yoongi places his hands on his hips as he watches you reason with your daughter.
"Jia, you know tomorrow's a big day right? You and Sana are going to go to the playground together." The child nods. "You don't want to be tired when you're playing do you?"
"No..." She shakes her head. "I want to be awake!"
"Then you need to listen to Daddy and go to sleep. That way you'll be full of energy tomorrow when you and Sana go on the swings or slide down all the big slides." You smile as Jia starts rubbing her drowsy eyes, yawning in the process.
"But I...okay," she slowly concedes, eyes fluttering shut as she gives into her sleepy state. Unsurprising to you and Yoongi, she was tired all along. But like most kids, hated going to bed.
"See?" You lay Jia in her bed and pull the covers up near her chin, giving her a light kiss on the side of her head. Yoongi bends down and does the same after you. "You just gotta talk to her a little, she'll typically fall asleep on her own."
"But I read her three of her favorite books." Yoongi shuts off the overhead light, along with the door to Jia's room, and follows you to your bedroom.
"That's different Yoon," you argue back. "Books excite her."
"She takes after you that way then." Yoongi pulls his t-shirt off, leaving him bare-chested, and climbs onto his side of the bed. You join him shortly after with your head resting on his chest and an arm thrown around his waist.
"I'm so exhausted," you yawn.
"Go to sleep, baby. I'm right here." Your husband places a hand over your wrapped arm, sending you off into a deep slumber.
Well this is just ironic. Almost 2 A.M. and you're wide awake.
What initially started as a nice, relaxing dream quickly turned into a terrible nightmare. In the dream, you woke up alone. Yoongi was gone. Jia was gone too. You can't exactly make sense of it, except for a vague memory of Jia calling another woman 'Mom'. You couldn't see her face very well, so it could've been anyone. You couldn't speak either, so even when you tried approaching the three, they couldn't hear you. You've had nightmares plenty of times, but this one is new. It's a clear projection of all the underlying concerns upheaved from earlier; insecurities, abandonment, loss, and it has you unsettled.
You glance over to your husband's side of the bed. He's fast asleep, no longer cuddling you due to you both flip-flopping in your sleep. You decide to slide closer to him, needing to watch him for a while. It might sound weird, but you love watching him sleep. He's so handsome and you feel a great deal of comfort doing so. Maybe if he was awake, you'd tell him about what you dreamt. Then again...maybe not.
"I love you Yoon," you whisper as quietly as you can, tracing his every facial feature with your eyes.
"'m, I love you too."
Is he-was he awake? As if caught red-handed, you quickly flit your face away in favor of the blank ceiling above. You weren't expecting him to answer at all, and in such a hoarse voice too. You're a little turned on by it to be honest.
"Can't sleep?" he speaks up again, eyes still closed.
"No, I''ll be okay though. You can go back to sleep. Don't worry."
He grunts, a tad unhappy with your dismissal of him. "Do you want to talk about it? Your dream?"
You whip your head in his direction. "Howâ" You pause, seeing his eyes blink open.
"I didn't meet you just yesterday, doll. I know they keep you up. Just know, I'm always here okay? Always." He reaches for you with delicate fingers as he continues. "Now, come here. Seems we got separated in our sleep."
You accept the offer and cuddle into him again. This time your noses nearly touch and his arm wraps around your lower waist. You feel the growing urge to kiss him, wanting to forget your nightmare entirely. But perhaps silly, you ask permission first, seeing as he's close to drifting off again.
"Yoon?"
"Mm."
"Can we kiss?" Your cheeks flush a little at the request. Why are you acting like this? You've been married for years.
"Sure, 'm tired but I could go for a make-out right now." A small smirk graces his lips as he teases you. You give him a classic 'Yoongi!' in reply. "I'm kidding. You don't ever have to ask me that," he finishes.
"Hmm, maybe I don't want a kiss anymore." You feign stubbornness, just to see his response. And a response he gives you, more than you're prepared for.
"You're ridiculous," he grumbles, capturing your lips in one fell swoop. He moves his lips against yours as the hand on your waist grips tighter. The tiniest of moans escapes your lips.
You attempt to break the kiss first, thinking it will only last for a few seconds. Yet Yoongi slips a hand behind your neck to bring you into another kiss. One that's deeper than the last. You feel your breath being taken away little by little, especially when his tongue licks into your mouth. God, you haven't kissed like this in an eternity. A wetness soon gathers between your thighs.
"'m, Yoon," you gasp when his cool fingers sneakily make their way under your shirt, tickling your bare skin. They travel the expanse of your waist, stomach, and up along your back. "So cold."
Yoongi pulls away from the kiss and retracts his fingers. He then lazily moves his body until his chest hovers over your own, rolling you on your back in the process. He's a bit of a blur due to the dimness of the room, yet you can see the whites of his eyes a bit better than before.
"Help me warm them then," he says, folding his hands on top of yours from where they rest on your stomach. "You're really burning up, doll."
His observation is right. Ever since you woke up, you're body's been hotter than normal. The stress is clear and it's only increasing due to the unexpected turn of tonight's events; your husband seemingly wanting to make love to you in the middle of the night.
"So I am," you reply, staring straight into his eyes. "Must be because of all the sudden surprises today. My body's finally responding to it all."
Yoongi nods, following your implication. "Well let's do something to calm it down, shall we?" He waits for your final go before making any abrupt movements.
"But...you haven't seen meâ"
"Naked in a while?" he predicts your next words, unfazed. "I've seen it all, each time better than the last because I love you. You're beautiful to me, no matter what. Let me love you __. I've missed you. I've missed us."
"Okay...please," you sigh, desperately needing his touch. "It's been so long since we've been this close."
Neither of you has it in you to delay another second as you dive into another fiery kiss, your hands wandering up and down each other's bodies. You love his hair the most, so you run your fingers through it repeatedly. Your husband's soft grunts remind you that it's as pleasurable for him as it is for you, and as if to counter, he latches his lips to the curve of your neck.
"Yoon," you moan, shivering at the feeling of being peppered in open-mouth kisses. Your eyes automatically roll up as well.
Yoongi nips at your jaw next, featherlike, yet deadly to you nevertheless. He doesn't allow himself to linger more than a second, though, preferring to keep you on your toes. So with careful fingers, he begins lifting the bottom of your shirt.
"Can I?"
You hum in approval and lean forward for him to remove it.
With your nipples now exposed to the brisk air, stiffening due to arousal, Yoongi brings both his hands up to caress your boobs. He's incredibly gentle, telling you how beautiful you are once again until his thumbs start circling your peaked nipples. A rush of sensation shoots up your spine as he rolls them harder, flicking them once in a while.
"Fuck," you swear.
"Feeling good?"
All you do is nod fervently in response, which Yoongi takes as his signal to lower his head to your chest. He squeezes both breasts in his hand before wrapping his mouth around a nipple, licking and sucking relentlessly. He repeats the same to the other.
"Yoongi, I need you. Please." You're core tightens, thighs struggling not to rub together, as you plead with your husband to relieve you. You are so wet and getting wetter.
"I'm here, doll, I got you. Fingers first hm?"
He pushes part of the comforter towards the foot of the bed, then gestures for you to raise your butt. Any shred of mystery of how worked up he's gotten you slip away as he pulls your underwear and pants down your legs. They both get tossed on the floor, per usual.
Bare pussy exposed, Yoongi guides your legs further apart and brings a hand down to your entrance. One of his long, slender fingers traces up your folds so smoothly that you buck your hips upon the touch. He smiles lightly at the subtle response, pleased that you're finally enjoying yourself; too often you put your needs last. His finger slowly sinks into your well-lubricated pussy, velvety walls clenching around it.
"Oh, g-god," you give a shaky moan as his finger pumps and curls in you, stimulating your g-spot. "Need you now, Yoon, so bad."
"Mm not yet, we need to stretch you out. You haven't taken me for a good three or four weeks," he smirks at your eagerness, sliding a second finger next to the first. "This pussy is drenched but not enough. I need you to come. Can you do that for me?"
Fast, quick movements follow suit as your husband works you up to an orgasm. Oh fuck, oh fuck, you chant in near whines. Your pussy is spasming around him, walls tightening with each push and pull. You know when he draws his hand out that it's covered with your come. Messy, sex is messy and both of you are too far gone to care; the pleasure sweeping over you.
Finally, in what feels like an endless tease, you have your first orgasm of the night. You feel your body relaxing into the mattress again, yet your breath remains short. Yoongi, on the other hand, groans seeing your release dripping down your thighs and onto the sheets. For a split second, there's a slight darkening in his eyes while he takes in your post-orgasmic form. The two fingers that had been inside you are sensually brought to his lips, slipping between the seam before being cleaned off.
You're taken aback by the action, though you've witnessed it before. Something about watching your husband willingly follow through with a gesture so lewd makes your head spinâyou want him to fuck you right this instant. He must share the same feeling because you don't even need to sound the words due to his hands already making quick work of his pants.
"You drive me mad, you know that? Can never get a break with how sweet you taste. Your lips, your come. All of it makes me go mad." His full length comes in view, hard and tip leaking with pre-cum. You try not to let yourself stare at the thickness but hell, you must've forgotten the extent of your husband's size. You don't remember it being this big before.
"Well," you gulp. "You're not making it easy on me either, looking like this."
Yoongi climbs over to you again, settling into a straddled position, and looks deep into your eyes. "Who's fault do you think that is?"
"It's your fault." You bend your legs and wrap them around his mid-section. You can feel the tip of his cock tease at your entrance. The anticipation is beyond grueling.
"No," he says, aligning himself up to your weeping hole. "it's yours." He then thrusts his hips forward, his length sinking into you so perfectly it has you completely satisfied.
"Y-Yours," you whimper out, unable to form a steady sentence.
"Fine." He picks up his pace. "Let's just agree we both fuck each other up on a daily---ah fuck!" Yoongi growls and gives you a suspicious look when he feels your pussy suddenly clench around his length.
"I didn't do it on purpose this time! You're fucking me too good is all."
"Really? You're not just teasing me?"
Yoongi is slow to believe since you've purposefully clenched countless times before, simply out of playfulness. Tonight is different than those nights though because you're telling the truthâhe's truly fucking you so good.
"What the hell," he concedes. "You feel so fucking fantastic, I don't even care." He continues his movements, thrusting into you with deep groans and labored breaths. His fingers grip the mattress harder with the veins in his neck bulging out.
Both your bodies move in sync as the familiar sound of skin slapping on skin echoes off the walls of your bedroom. You do your best to keep your moans low, not wanting to risk waking up your daughter.
"Yoon, fuck! I need to come, it's gonna-fuck-happen soon," you swear, pussy throbbing at the feeling of being so full after weeks of abstinence. You can tell you're reaching your high with the bundle of nerves in your core threatening to snap at any given moment.
Of course, you're wet too, extremely wet.
"I'm. Nearly. There." He barely sounds the words out, jaw clenching. "Just another minute, and we can finish together."
Your eyes, which haven't left his since he entered you, begin to glass over with tears. It's overwhelming; his love for you. No matter the doubts that tell you the opposite, you can't give in to their ugly lies. You'll continue to struggle, naturally, but you won't ever let them win. Yoongi's never once given up on you, and neither should you.
"I love you, Yoon...I love you with all my soul," you choke the words, falling apart all at once. "I'm sorry for today. How jealous and irrational I got."
"Don't apologize, doll. I shouldn't have let it go so far, our lack of intimacy and alone time. I promise we're going to make it all right okay?"
Giving you one last thrust, you both have your release at the same time. Yoongi helps ride your orgasm out by lazily continuing to grind into you. Yeah, you might need to shower and switch out the sheets after tonight, but you don't regret it one bit.
"In all seriousness baby," Yoongi speaks up, guiding your legs back on the soft mattress until youâre comfortable. "Don't feel like you have to apologize for everything. I understand your feelings and where you were coming from. I will say, the silent treatment kills me though. I'd rather you yell at me than not talk to me at all."
"It's not easy for me to raise my voice like that, Yoon." You throw your arms around his neck and sigh softly. "But I can try talking to you more, or at least tell you I need some time to process before I'm ready to have a conversation. I don't know, am I making sense?"
"Plenty of sense. I'll share more about my day with you and who I'm talking to as well. We'll also carve out time to have together. I love our daughter, but I don't see the harm in reaching out to our friends and family to babysit once in a while."
"Well, this sounds good to me," you hum.
"Me too." Yoongi smiles wide and goes in for another warm kiss. Your eyes flutter shut in unison.
This is what love feels like.
a/n: LMK what you think đĽ°
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HELP ALAA ACHIEVE âŹ6,000 IN THE NEXT 2 DAYS!
THIS IS URGENT! Please have a look at this fundraiser. It belongs to Alaa Amsee ( @alaakh99 ) who is a loving mother to two beautiful children named Maria and Hamza.Â
Alaa has had her tumblr account terminated for the SECOND TIME, resulting in her being unable to continue her efforts to campaign for herself and her children at a VERY crucial time. It should infuriate you to see this happen, especially in light of the recent smear campaign against palestinian gfms. We can assume now that many of the Palestinian blogs have been deactivated, because of baseless reports of being scams.  Â
THE LAST DONATION CAME IN 23 HOURS AGO. PRIOR TO THAT, SOME DONATIONS CAME IN 2 DAYS AGO!!
We CANNOT let this fundraiser be stagnant. Alaa and her two children are suffering from hepatitis, and malnutrition. Their lives are on the line and they need medical care ASAP!Â
Her life wasn't always like this! Before October 7, Alaa led a peaceful life with her family which consisted of her children, husband, in-laws and immediate family, but soon the nightmare began and came to a head on October 28, when her neighborhood got bombed in its entirety.Â
Alaa escaped certain death that night as her house collapsed and trapped her family in. Debris choked them all, and they had to be rescued from under the rubble and shattered glass. Alaa describes what she witnessed that night as "unimaginable"- death, corpses and blood, surrounded the family.Â
Even after this tragedy, the pain did not let up and chased them to the Rimal neighborhood. The bombing continued and Alaa had to put wet masks on Maria and Hamza, so that the children could endure the terrible smoke and burning smell. Things got so bad throughout the next few months that Hamza who is only 3 years old, now talks only of bombings, rockets and tanks.Â
I want to remind you that Maria, Alaa's little daughter, has contracted hepatitis after being displaced for the third time, where they had to flee to Rafah. Being overcrowded, one can only access shared bathrooms which are primary causes of such viral infections. The children have suffered from epidemics and skin diseases, and the little tent Alaa has managed to acquire can barely sustain life in summer heatÂ
On top of that, there is hardly any nutritious food and clean drinking water- which means that at one point, the family had to survive on weeds and bread made from animal feed. I cannot tell you how horrible this is! How Alaa and her children still suffer even now. In fact, at the moment of writing this post, Alaa messaged me about her tent shaking due to bombings nearby.Â
So I urge you not to ignore her, please, and help her reach her short term goal of 6K within the next 2 days !!
Her fundraiser has been up since May and has only reached âŹ4543 which is a little above 4% of her end goal! Please donate and share! I also request you to follow Alaa ( @alaakh99 ) and help her save her children from this genocide!
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the one with the role play â gojo satoru
â your husband breaking character during role play after you mention the one thing you shouldnât have
suggestive, MDNI, established relationship (youâre married), written with f! reader in mind but think i kept it pretty gn, alcohol (nobody gets drunk, just a super quick mention of it as a choice of drink at the bar), strangers at the bar role play (or a failed attempt tbh), based on this talk post of mine, wc: 1.3k
âhey, loveâ, satoru broke the silence while the two of you were folding the laundry one afternoon. (yes, the strongest sorcerer always helps his wife with chores)
âsay, loveâ, you quickly responded, without looking at him.
âyou know, i was thinking â weâve never tried role playâ
âthatâs what folding clothes made you think of?â, glancing at him you chuckled, âinterestingâ, raising an eyebrow teasingly.
âweâve done pretty much everything but that. youâre not curious?â
now was not the time to tell him that you had done this before, with your ex, and that it was fun. no need to remind him that you had other partners before him and make him lose sleep for days to come, like that one time when he found your diary from high school in the attic and read about all the crushes and boyfriends you had. it took weeks and a lot of coddling on your part (you even had to start a satoru only diary and write his name into little hearts) for him to get over it. so you figured youâd keep this little detail to yourself and take it to the grave. or it would be your husband taken to the grave due to lethal jealousy steaming from the fact that another man had laid his hands on you in the past.
âs-sureâ, you stuttered, thinking back to that excruciating memory, then cleared your throat before continuing â âyea, we can do that, why notâ
âgood thenâ, he tossed the shirt in his hands aside and stepped closer to you. circling his arms around your waist from behind â one hand eventually resting over your chest while the other stopping at your navel and gently rubbing it â he possessively pressed you against his chest and hummed contently.
âsomeoneâs very excited about this, huh?â, you placed your hand over his and tilted your head back to peek at him.
âoh? can you tell?â, he grinned, playfully pushing his hips against you.
âthat giant thing in your pants poking me from behind is giving you away, iâm afraidâ
âitâs your fault thoughâ, his head craned down so his lips could reach your forehead and trail soft kisses down to the tip of your nose.
standing on your tip toes you raised your hands to cup his cheeks and pecked him on the lips. âof course, itâs my fault that youâre getting all hot and bothered in the middle of the day like some pervertâ
âi always get hot and bothered thinking about youâ, he pecked you back, then slowly turned you around (concerned that you might hurt your neck if you kept that position up).
âany ideas?â, you asked.
â8pm, the bar around the cornerâ
âweâre to enact the classic strangers meeting at the bar, huh? okay. anything else?â
ânope, letâs improviseâ
[8:13pm, at the bar]
sitting alone on the stool at the bar counter, you kept playing with your now half empty martini glass, drawing circles with it on the surface. you felt a bit weird sitting here pretending to be single and ready to mingle. but oh well.
he was late. you took another sip of your drink and grabbed your phone to check the time again.
ânext oneâs on meâ, a painfully familiar voice approached you from behind. âif you would allow me, that isâ
he was late on purpose, you figured. waiting for you to almost finish your drink so he could easily start a conversation by using such a lame but still quite effective line.
âi donât normally accept drinks from strangersâ, you gazed at him, âbut an exception every now and then wouldnât hurt, i assumeâ
a puckish smile curved on his lips. âmay i?â, taking his sunglasses off, he asked for your permission to sit next to you.
âsureâ
you were quite impressed at how seriously he was actually taking this, not breaking character even for a second so far. he had made up a brand new persona of himself, introducing himself as âsato kouyaâ â the ceo of a leading pharmaceutical company, temporarily living in tokyo for the purpose of a big business project.
âenough about me thoughâ, eyes focused on you, he leaned his elbow on the bar counter and placed his chin on his palm. âtell me about yourself â whatâs a beauty like you doing alone?â
you giggled (he was just so cute right now). âyouâre lucky that i am alone â if we had met a week earlier, i wouldâve still been marriedâ
his expression froze at your words. the smile from a few seconds ago was now bleeding into a confused, almost creepy, look on his face â his lips still stretched into a grin while his eyes told a different story.
âhmmm⌠how so?â, he spoke in a monotone, his grin slowly fading away.
it would be a lie to say his weird reaction didnât concern you at all but you decided to brush it off, and continued. âyou see, i just got officially divorced. my ex husband and i tried our best to keep the marriage going for as long as we could but we were simply not meant to beâ, you sighed. âthis was the best for both of usâ
âno wayâ, satoru whined. âno fucking wayâ
âumm⌠excuse me?â, you tilted your head in confusion.
âi donât like thisâ, his face giving you a dejected grimace â brows knitted, lips pursed into a pout and eyes filled with a mix of panic and sorrow taking over the blue in them and turning it into a darker shade. âdivorced? not meant to be? donât even joke about thisâ, he almost cried out. the thought alone rubbed him the wrong way, tugged at his heartstrings so intensely that it forced him out of character right then and there, putting an end to your little role play escapade (rip sato kouya, you will be missed).
âsatoruâ, you caressed his hand, âbaby. love of my life. this is just an act, please get it togetherâ
âohâ, he gasped in utter shock after his focus fell on your hand and he noticed you were not wearing your ring. âyou even took your ring off? why would you do that?â
great, this was getting worse now.
âbecause of the role playâ, you spoke each word slowly, stressing on the last two very carefully.
âbut iâm still wearing mineâ, he protested, pointing at his ring, âsee? you couldâve still acted fine with your ring on and without bringing up divorce and not meant to beâsâ, he cried again, a hangdog look splattered on his face.
âi didnât want to play the cheating wife, thatâs why i took it oââ, you were cut off by another dramatic reaction.
âcheating? CHEATING? you considered this scenario?â, his voice was hitting desperate notes at this point. you couldnât believe he had lost all reason over a play pretend.
you pinched the bridge of your nose before you spoke, âokay, thatâs enough. youâre being ridiculous right now. iâm going homeâ
he followed after you like a kicked puppy, whining all the way home. but you had to admit â part of you really loved the fact that he went completely out of his mind over something so silly, that he didnât know what to do with himself just thinking about you possibly leaving him even in a made-up scenario, that you held so much power over himâŚ
extra:
[later that night, in bed]
done reading for the night and ready to sleep, you placed your book on the nightstand and looked over at your husband sitting with his arms crossed next to you in bed.
âstill not over it?â, you nestled your head on his chest.
âno. hurts like hell just thinking about itâ, he mumbled.
âcome on, stop poutingâ, you pinched his cheek, âyou canât go to sleep with a grumpy faceâ
âyea?â, he glanced down at you, âsit on it then â itâs the only way to wipe that pout off of itâ
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Would you write something about Cregan Stark getting married to a reader of a house of your choice and thus sealing alliances and being fluffy?
WINTER ROSE. ⨠cregan stark x tyrell!reader âŠ
since your birth, the third child and only daughter of highgardenâs lord, your fate had always been a marriage for political means. your elder brother would inherit the title, the other set for life as a knight of the seven kingdoms. you were a girl and your purpose was to marry well and secure a strong alliance for your family.
it didnât take long to come to terms with what your life would look like. you would come of age and be sent away to the lord that would benefit you most. for your family, you would do it. but, every night, you would kneel by your pillow and pray that your husband would at least be kind â- it neednât be true love, like the stories you often read. as long as he wasnât cruel.
âcregan stark has been named the new lord of winterfell and is in need of a wife,â your father announced one morning, amidst the feasting hall. âi have sent a raven to offer your hand and he has accepted.â
your mother beamed, grasping your shoulders proudly. âmy daughter, lady of winterfell.â
âwe are in need of his banners and he needs our grain and cloths for the winter,â lord tyrell explains, shrugging as though it were simply a swap of goods and not the life of his daughter. âit is a fair exchange.â
by the next moon, you were departing the green and gold covered fields of highgarden and journeying north on the roseroad. the colder it became, the more you missed the sweet sun and elegant surroundings of your home. northerners were rough and unforgiving to outsiders, each one you met along the way adding to the dreaded image of your husband.
the first time you laid eyes on cregan stark was when you were taken along the path to the godswood. he was handsome, you couldnât deny that. but his tall build, stoic features and steady gaze made you shiver â- even under the furs youâd been given. he had the look of a northerner, but did he have the heart of one too?
âby the old gods and the new, i name you man and wife,â the septon concluded the ceremony, unbinding the cloth wrapped around your hands. expectant eyes looked on, forcing a blush upon your face as you reached up and pressed a soft kiss to creganâs cheek.
if you were to confess under the eyes of the godswood, you were afraid of cregan stark. his eyes were unwavering, lips fixed in a permanent frown. other than his vows of marriage, he hadn't said a word. neither of you were elated to be trapped into a marriage of convenience, but you knew you hadn't any choice in the matter. at the least, he could look like he was enduring it.
sat now at the top table in winterfell's great feast hall, your new husband at your side, the celebrations were growing louder the longer the wine was being poured. you sat quietly, barely sipping at your cup. only when the loud, booming voice of cregan's men rang out did you come back to the present.
"a toast, to the new lady of winterfell! may she be as beautiful under our lord as she is beside him."
the laughs that emulated from it made you grimace, so used to being treated as the perfect lady, protected from all things becoming to a man. you knew of sex, the people of the reach having always been open about their bodies and pleasures, but the northern aggression that came with it was foreign to you.
"to the bedding ceremony!"
the ladies at highgarden had warned you of the tradition that came at weddings, the entire party parading around the newlyweds as they stripped and consummated the bond. it was daunting enough to take your new husband to bed, but to be watched by tens of strangers? it had your heart suddenly hammering out of your chest, every muscle tensing in a cold shock.
"enough!" the commanding voice of the man by your side cut through the cheers, silencing the hall in an instant. it was the first time he had spoken since the ceremony, current volume making up for the silence. "there will be no bedding ceremony. anyone who protests will meet the sword at once."
whilst everyone else cowered under the threat, you felt yourself relax with a warm relief. cregan turns to meet your surprise, both his eyes and tongue turning soft as he speaks just to you now.
"you may retire, if you wish."
nodding gratefully, you follow the gentle hand of your lady-in-waiting out of the busy feast and along the strange halls of the cold castle. even your chambers are cold, the climate seeming to cling to the stone around the bed. the silk nightdresses you had brought with you do nothing to shield you from it, so once your lady departs you begin to forage through the chests for something to keep you warm. eventually finding a smaller set of furs amongst the others, you drape it around your shoulders and relish in the heat that comes with it.
"is everything to your liking?"
jumping in shock, you turn on your heels to find cregan stood at the doorway, just about filling the whole space. his eyes flicker down to the furs -- his furs, covering you and a small smirk pulls at the corner of his lips.
"i'm sorry," you stumble quickly. "it was cold and it was all i could find."
cregan's head shakes, dismissing your apologies. "it's alright. everything here is as much yours as it is mine, now."
you smile, head falling bashfully to glance at the floor. "i hadn't expected everything to be so... different here. it will take some time to adjust, i think."
nodding in understanding, cregan crosses the room to stand in front of you. you feel yourself shiver under his gaze, watching him study you amongst his territory. hesitantly, his hand slips from under his own furs to reach for your own. you let him, both of you treading new water as your learn each other's touch; the smoothness of your palms, the rough pads of his thumbs, the heat that encompassed your chilled knuckles. the sensation is wonderful, like two puzzle pieces slotting together.
"whatever you need to help you enjoy your new life here, no matter the extent, it will be my honour to find it for you," cregan tells you, the kindness in his voice a pleasant welcome. "you are my wife now, it is my duty to make you comfortable."
feeling your cheeks warm, rounding with the first genuine smile in days. your heart swells and the feeling that this marriage might just be okay fills you, so much so that you find yourself reaching up to kiss cregan's cheek once more. unlike the bonding of the vows, this one is genuine and of your own volition, expressing the gratitude you could not find words for.
"i can sleep elsewhere for the night, if you would wish..." cregan continues, clearing his throat to distract from the small blush that creeps past his skin.
"no, stay," you tell him, squeezing his hand. "perhaps we could talk, learn more about each other."
the suggestion eases you both. cregan agrees, using your hand to guide you towards the bed, only leaving for a moment to fetch you more furs for the night. he potters around, changing for sleep, and the domestic scene lets you relax into the pillows.
it wasn't a marriage for love - yet. but perhaps it could be, with time.
#âď¸ ďš writings.#hotd#house of the dragon#hotd imagine#house of the dragon imagine#house of the dragon x reader#hotd drabbles#cregan stark#cregan x reader#cregan stark x reader#cregan stark imagine#cregan stark fanfic#tom taylor#hotd x reader
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I've never sent a request before, but I'm fiending for more adam, like anything, anything at all
Benefit of the doubt
Adam x 3rd Spouse! Reader
Viewer discretion is advised
Warnings: Angst(?), Not exactly fluff at the end but it gets better, typical Adam TWâs, reader low-key high-key has a complex about being loved, this is set way before the show, and Gn! Reader. (Also Y/n isnât used, which also surprised me, the author, LMAO)
Part 2 Part 3 Part 4
Request Box: Open
Word count: 1760
A/N: Hi! Thanks for the request! I havenât had a chance to write something that was originally my own idea in a while, so this was very refreshing! Iâve had this idea since Iâve watched the show so I hope you enjoy it!
Iâm entirely up for making a small series from this oneshot, but I would need to know yâallâs opinion on it! (So donât feel scared to let me know if you want some more of this idea in my Request box/the replies on this post!!)
Also Adam may be slightly OOC but please just chalk it up to him not yet getting his egoâs dick sucked 24/7
Anyways, I hope you all enjoy, let me know if you do!
Proofread but of course could have left mistakes!
Youâve existed for almost all of human existence, Almost.
You were the 4th being to be created during the time of Eden. But unlike the other 3, you werenât human. In fact, you technically never lived before. An honestly hopeless existence, yet it was so beautiful in every way. But for what purpose? WellâŚ
You were created shortly after Eve ate the apple, before she and eventually Adam committed the first act of sin that caused evil to latch onto humanity like a leech.
The reason for your existence was simple. To be Adamâs new spouse, except for when after he died. From the very moment Eve bit the fruit of temptation, it was already decided she would hold no place in heaven. Adam was given mercy due to him not possessing any knowledge of the fruit Eve had shared with him, he trusted her wholeheartedly. Which is exactly why heaven gave him mercy⌠no, pity would be a better choice of words.
Upon your creation you learned immediately of the happenings before your existence. About Lilith and Eve, and about Lucifer
And so, after Adam and Eve were casted away from the Garden, they continued to live their lives, fostering the existence of mankind for the rest of time. And when they eventually died, Adam was given pity while Eve was thrown to the wayside, the vast unknown.
You thought it was finally your time to experience existence with the one you loved, the one you were made for. Of course you never would know life as he did but surely your life never-after life could be just as meaningful as his.
How excited you were, how completely enamored by the thought of it. But there was a problem with that, Adam had grown into a new person, he was meant to of course, he was human. But he had grown selfish, abhorrent⌠insecure.
You understood why, to be betrayed by not one but two of his wives for the same person. You couldnât possibly imagine what he could be feeling. Before you were to meet your future husband, Sera informed you that he had asked for a mask, and once on, he has refused to take it off.
That didnât bother you, itâs irrelevant to your love for him. You've only heard descriptions of his features. Short Brown hair, gold eyes, bushy eyebrows, some scruff on his chin. All in all, he sounded perfectly fine, ordinary even. But even then itâs his choice to wear the mask, so youâll respect it.
Finally, the time he arrived in heaven, and when Sera finally introduced you, his new spouse, the one to whom would be by his side for the rest of forever.
He rejected you outright.
âWhat?â Your breath hitched as you stuttered over the word, the sharp inhale of your lungs through your mouth flicked through the air.
Sera looked just as shocked as you but she quickly regained her composure âWhat is the meaning of this Adam?â
âIf you think Iâm going to let my life get fucked over by another one of your âgiftsâ well, youâve got another thing coming!â He crossed his arms and shook his head defyingly. âIâve already learned my lesson with those last 2 bitches.â
âAdam Iâm sorry that happened to you but I would never-â almost like lightning his finger shot to your mouth, shushing you.
âSave it, Sweetcheeks, I really donât care what you have to say, so just stay there and look pretty, k?â His hand fell and grabbed the sides of your face, squishing your cheeks together, his LED mask flashing a sharp smile.
You saddeningly looked down at the clouds below you.
âAdam!â Seraâs voice sounded through the air, still soft but firm, she continued, placing a hand on your shoulder, âDivine judgment allowed you to be the first human soul in heaven, so I gave you the benefit of the doubt. I expect you to give your new spouse that same grace.â
Slowly your eyes looked up at Sera with a soft smile. Adam only groaned âUgh, Fine but donât be fuxking annoying, capiche?â You nod your head quickly.
âVery good, glad we have it settled.â Sera gives a quick smile, ânow, I have some business to take care of so Iâll leave you two alone to get to know one anotherâ With that, Sera flew away leaving the both of you alone.
The silence was thick in the air, the only sound being the occasional wind breeze blowing past. The sunlight creeps in through the clouds painting an orange sky above you both. In every sense of the word, it was perfect.
It was almost funny. You had waited so long to finally meet him, your true love, the one you were made for. All the things you dreamed about, the laughs youâd have together, the warm embrace of the person who you loved. But now⌠you didnât know what to sayâŚ
âIâm⌠happy to finally meet you.â Your voice is quiet, almost non-audible. âIâve been waiting for you since⌠well, foreverâŚâ
He doesnât respond. He seems to be transfixed on something below you both. You train your eyes on whatever heâs watching only to see the dark cavernous abyss below you. Finally he breaks his silence.
âThe fuck is that?â He asked pointing down, a sound of genuine intrigue hidden behind his abrasive voice
âThatâs hell?â You stated confused âwhere would-be sinners will go to be punished, didnt you k-â you suddenly realized that perhaps Adam really didnât know what hell was. It was only created relatively recently, after Eve and Him ate the apple, of course he wouldnât know. âitâs also where Lucifer-â
âDonât fucking say his name.â Adam spoke, his voice rough in his speech. LED mask putting a harsh frown on his face. âLetâs get one thing straight MâKay babe, if youâre my ânew spouseâ thatâs something you should remember.â The ânew spouseâ was said with a tone clearly meant to mock you.
âSorryâŚâ
âUgh, Itâs fine, just donât do it again.â He groaned before a wicked smile crept onto his mask âSooo, that means heâs going to be stuck with all the wasteful beings of existence, HA fuxkinâ hilarious. Guess that makes them the losers and us the Winners!â
His laugh filled the air, the sound was like music to your ears, sure maybe it wasnât really what youâd hoped heâd fine funny, but you loved it all the same but eventually his laugh died down
Silence again⌠in admits of all of it you suddenly was sparked with a thought âoh!â Adam looked confused at the random exclamation. âI had almost forgotten⌠I brought you something, as a welcome gift or was it a nice to meet you gift? Both? Eh, it doesnât matter but the point is-â you suddenly snap your fingers.
Golden light began shining, the light seemed like liquid hot magma as it moved and molded slowly into a shape. Light seemed to be overlapping and churning into itself, forming your desired outcome. With one final snap of your fingers, the gleaming gold liquid took hold, and quickly hardened to a solid.
The object that had formed quickly fell down, landing in your arms with a light thud.
âIâm still learning this creation stuff, so Iâm sorry if itâs not perfect but-â you hold out the object in your arms as an invitation to grab it âI learned from Sera that you liked to play guitar when you were alive, so I thought you might like to have one hereâŚâ
Adam looked at the instrument in your hands. The base color was gold, the neck was pearly white with gold strings. To be honest it looked more like a harp then anything, like if a guitar and a harp had a baby.
Silence again. Did he not like it? Did he hate it? You go to pull it back to you and apologize when suddenly itâs ripped out from your hands.
âHolyshit, this is sick as Fuck!â Adam immediately started playing some rifts on the new guitar. The sound wasnât what you were expecting but you guess Sera was right about his talent with the instrument. The whole time his mask had a wide and sharp smile as he mimicked guitar sounds with his voice, the occasional laugh leaving his mouth.
âIâm really glad you like itâ you say, a sigh of relief leaving your body.
Adam looked at you, one you missed. He saw how relieved you were, how nice you were being. No person who supposedly loved him ever gifted him something, well, one other did. Someone he trusted and loved more than everyone, anyone. But look how that ended, with them being removed from the garden, away from an eternity of happiness until he died. All from someone giving him what he thought was nothing but love, a gift.
But he could see that this was different, you were different. When Eve gave him the apple, she didnât explain what it was or why she wanted him to eat it, even when he asked her she didnât explain. But with you, you had not only given him something you knew he liked but also expressed the reason behind it. Yes, you were different, even Adam could see it.
âAnyways, thanks for the axe, I guessâŚâ Adam for the first time was stunned, but quickly he continued âWhat was the thing that Sera chick said about me and âdivine judgmentâ or whatever the fuck? That she gave me the âbenefit of the doubtâŚâ
You were a bit confused but continued listening, âI guess I should at least try to give you a chance, since you got me this sick ass guitar anâ shit.â Your face lit up, you about began to speak before you were, once again, shushed âB-B-But-â his finger tapped your lips with each repeated syllable â-only a chance. If you betray me like those last 2 bitches then youâre done, got it?â
To say you were overjoyed would be an understatement, a smile quickly plastered across your face as you quickly nodded your head
âAlright good, so uh, what do ya say about showing me the best places to get a bite to eat around here, I could really go for some ribs right about now.â
â Iâd⌠love to, thank you Adamâ
âYeah donât mention it Sweetcheeksâ Adam quickly wrapped his arm around your shoulder and you two began walking.
Maybe you will get your eternity of happiness.you can only pray you do.
#Hazbin hotel#hazbin#hazbin hotel x reader#hazbin x reader#hazbin hotel x gn reader#hazbin hotel x female reader#hazbin hotel x male reader#Hazbin x gn reader#Hazbin x female reader#Hazbin x male reader#adam x reader#Adam x gn reader#Adam x female reader#Adam x male reader#hazbin hotel adam#hazbin adam#hazbin hotel adam x reader#Hazbin Adam x reader#Hazbin hotel Adam x gn reader#Hazbin hotel Adam x female reader#Hazbin hotel Adam x male reader#Hazbin Adam x gn reader#Hazbin Adam x female reader#hazbin adam x male reader#light angst#angst with a happy ending#x reader#x male reader#character x male reader#fanfic
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the sapphire and his sun
Aemond Targaryen x f!reader
Musings about Aemond Targaryen and the only one he truly needs. His one true hope and love. His beloved wife.
a/n : i had to write something after that episode! holy Aemond! This pretty much wrote itself and I could expand it in the future ~ if inspiration strikes true!
word count : <2k âŞď¸ masterlist
Aemond used to think his only solace was himself.
His mother had never been much of a mother in her own right, too muddled in the web of deceit that she and Otto spin at their fancy. Criston posited as something of a father figure, but his true loyalty is to his Queen. His brother has always been a wastrel, and his sister wasting away in her own mind.
Aemond never had anyone. Not truly.
Until you.
He still remembers the day you walked into his life, a lone ray of sunlight breaking through the clouds of stormy grey. You appeared to be a frail-hearted young lady, eager to please and to be a devoted wife to her prince. All the while he saw your spirit dimmed from being offered by her House to be Prince Aemond's newly betrothed.
All to secure an alliance.
There was no promise of loyalty or love. Being the prince, he is able to take into bed any whore he wishes. But one look at you - just the one - and all thought of any other lover vanished from his mind.
The first night he was supposed to take you to bed and consummate your marriage, the meek cast in your eyes had disappeared, and in its place a defiant glint he hadn't seen before.
"If I am to be used by my prince, I will do it with the remaining shred of my dignity. I will not cry, I will not beg for a life I have already lost. If all that I am now is a vessel for duty, then so be it." You looked at him, as if for the first time, and with the flames dancing across your face, Aemond would remember that moment as when his sun first shone down on him.
He felt his anger flare for but a moment, his constant fear of being betrayed taking over him. Had everything been an act? Was this to be a marriage of unpleasantry and resentment?
But it quickly dawned on him that the act - the betrayal - was that if his wife was willing to play a fool and dance under his strings like some marionette.
He preferred this. He preferred you.
"Mayhaps I will not bed you tonight, my lady wife. Not yet," he had said, your face slowly twisting in surprise. "I will let you keep more than just your dignity, for you will also possess the choice. Trust that it is only for the time being, at least, until it is imperative that I produce an heir. From this moment forward, I swear to take no else to bed as it is my oath as your husband."
He watched the minute switches in your expression. The wariness. The confusion. The relief. And he already felt it then, as silly as the notion might be, that you had recognised who he really was and that you accepted him.
Aemond was no scoundrel. He wasn't a villain in your story. He wasn't some mighty, untouchable prince.
He was a boy. He was now your husband. He had decency. He had a heart.
And you may not have yet realised, but this heart - wretched as it might have been - he was surrendering it to you.
With the turn of the moon came ill tidings - the death of his father Viserys. Although he was also not much of a father to begin with. Aemond felt numb to it all and there was no time for any emotion to take root, for the conspiracy festered like an open wound. His brother was to be made king.
"Must you go and find him?" you asked. "What if something were to happen?"
He had been blank and unfeeling, unsure of what to make his father's passing. But then, some warmth bloomed in him at your concern. His darling wife cared. He hadn't yet been allowed to indulge in the pleasures of your flesh, but your nights were filled with conversation and confiding.
He took your hands and pressed a kiss atop each one. "It is I who understands Aegon's doings, my wife. Ser Criston is in need of my aid. My brother would sooner sail away than fulfil his duty, which is why he must return at all cost."
"Let him sail away. Let him go and live as he pleases, husband. He never possessed the temperament of a king. You on the other hand... "
His father is dead. His brother could be gone. The enemy encroaches.
But gods be damned, you believed in him.
Aemond didn't know for certain what happiness felt like, he'd never had a single taste of it. And how morbid it was for him to possibly feel it then. But...
"You would make a far better ruler than anyone, and I don't just say that because I am your wife."
Happiness. How fascinating.
How utterly... simple.
For he realised that he had felt it before. Not even in grand moments, no, but in the littlest of things.
He had felt it when you once laughed in pure bliss when he first rode with you atop Vhagar.
When you would help fasten him into his training armour.
When he would watch as you read one of your stories.
His happiness was standing right in front of him. His ray of light, his sun.
And his sun persisted even when he singlehandedly cast the realm into macabre blacks and greens.
Shaken and despondent, he stumbled into your chambers to deliver the news to you first. In the passing hour, everything will change. Will you turn on him too?
"It was an accident," he confessed. "I thought I could control Vhagar, but... she is her own beast. She always has been. I admit I was angry and it was my folly to seek vengeance, but I did not mean to... " His voice broke, and he felt your finger wipe at something wet from his cheek.
He did not even notice that he was crying.
You still said nothing, so he grew frightful. What if nothing he said would ever be enough? No explanation, no apology. He can't lose his light.
"I never held any love for him," he carried on painfully, "but he was my blood. And I... I just - "
"It wasn't your fault, Aemond."
A ray of hope. A remaining strength.
You repeat, "I believe you, and it wasn't your fault."
It mattered not whether his mother would shun him, or his grandsire would frown upon his gruesome action. Rhaenyra was coming for him, as sure as dragonfire, and he would soon have to face the consequences of his actions.
But none of that worried him, not then.
He had to stay alive, however he can, so that he can protect you. It was not remiss of him to overlook that the ladywife of Lucerys' apparent murderer would also have a target on her back.
Aemond knew that the fight was inevitable, and he was going to win it. For you.
In tears, in love, in pale shades of grief, he kissed you with everything he had in him.
A solemn promise. A declaration of love.
"No one shall know the truth of it, my love."
"What do you mean?"
"They will not know, but you will. And that is all that matters. There is no stopping it now and I must face the war head on. What the realm will come to accept is that I intended to fell my nephew and that I do not regret doing so. They have to fear me. This is how I can keep you safe."
"Aemond - "
"Do you trust me?"
The only thing that mattered, the one answer that decided whether he bent or broke. The Seven Kingdoms were to be covered in gloom and shadow, its fields marred with blood and many a broken bone.
His world, however - his world still had light.
"I trust you. With everything I have, I do."
To be tagged in Aemond or Daemon fics, comment on this post !
#aemond targaryen x reader#aemond targaryen#aemond targaryen imagine#aemond targaryen oneshot#house of the dragon#ewan mitchell
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Dark Romance
Astrology Observations
-â¤ď¸Birth chart placements showing "words of affirmation" as a love language: â¤ď¸
Moon, Venus or Mercury in air signs
Virgo/Gemini/Leo placements
Mercury in the air houses, 3rd, 7th, 11th
7th house in gemini, libra, aquarius
Gemini, LIbra, Aquarius Rising
Venus - Mercury aspects
Moon - Mercury aspects
Sun - Mercury aspects
Virgo/Sagittarius and Gemini placements can be good writers. They can be good at writing on any topic. If you ever decide to write a dark romance book, you can have success alongside that
I observed that for earth & water placements especially Venus and Moon is very important to show that you care and have time for them, dont cancel things with them since they may overthink you dont pay that much attention to the relationship
Scorpio, Aquarius and Capricorn placements especially Venus/Mars/Moon value loyalty a lot in their romantic relationships, they are also value trust in their relations as well
Taurus Sun/Moon/Mars may love to be surprised by their partners with love gifts/does not have to be something fancy or expensive. Just make sure they appreciate it
Venus in the 6h/Venus at 6 or 18 degrees/Venus in Virgo are adorable in a love relatinship, they will always pay attention to everything!! They can offer to do romantic things for you as a gift of their adoration for you
Venus in the 12H or Venus at 12, 24 degrees can have dreams about their partners or future potential partners, they can dream about being into a relationship like in movies
Venus aspecting Pluto in my opinion is the definition of dark romance, this aspect can often make the native to fall in love with "villain" type of partners, or the "bad guys", not the stereotypes but the true meaning of them
South Node aspecting Venus in my opinion is like you try to find your love in every life you have, past or present always searching for that "one"
Pisces/Libra/Taurus Moon/Mars/Venus/7th house need romanticisim in their relationship, they are nothing without the feeling of love in their lives. They can always give the same energy back
Leo/Virgo/Cancer Moon/Mars/Venus/7th house need someone they can rely on in their relationships, a partner you can always count on, someone supportive and proud for being your partner
Capricorn/Aquarius/Aries Moon/Mars/Venus/7th house need a love partner who can see the good in them even when they fail, someone they can go through the challenges of life, someone they can grow old with
Scorpio/Gemini/Sagittarius Moon/Mars/Venus/7th house need someone who lasts, someone who will always choose them, someone who is worthy to love with all of your heart and soul, a love partner who will always put you first
Jupiter aspecting in good aspects Venus natives can have really beautiful and blessed love relationships, you can feel the luckiest with them, truly a real fantasy
Pluto/Neptune/Uranus and Saturn in the 7H give the vibe of "You did all of these just to find the love you always deserved". Generational planets last long and are secured
Moon/Mercury/Mars and venus in the 5H give beautiful creative relationships, someone you can always learn from, someone you can create beautiful things togther
Sun in the 4H husbands will give their life and soul for their family/kids, they will be the best husbands to everyone and kind of like a fahter example to others
If they have their Mars in the same sign as your Venus you can feel both of an attraction and denial to eachother, like you know that you love them but in a way you wanna keep it away too
Mars in Sagittarius/9H or at 9, 21 degrees will be down for whatever you want to do, they love trying new things and love to live the experience together with their partners
LIlith aspecting Sun can create a sort of mystery around people and secret admires, like you can never know if someone has an interest in you because of this secretive aura
Your MARS SIGN can be attracted over the body part its zodiac sign rules over:
For exmaple cancer mars attracted to the chest
leo mars attracted to the upper back/back
capricorn/aquarius legs zone
scorpio mars genital zone
aries mars to the face zone
taurus/gemini to the neck/ears/hands
pisces mars to the feet (No kink shame)
sag mars to the hips/thighs
virgo mars to the belly zone/waist
libra mars to the butt
5H Placements especially mercury, venus or moon can get in relationships young, is that "high school" love, gemini/virgo over the 5h can as well
Having a partner who has 8H placements especially Jupiter/uranus/venus and mercury is so HOT! Dominant energy yet always lovely to their partners!!
Uranus in the 5h/8H can make people interseted in your sexual life, sexuality, kinks, things that turn you on and so many others,,,some got no shame at all
Uranus in 2h or the 6h loves a good damn physcal touch!, they will love being touched everywhere but i feel they mostly like to give hugs and kisses
Lilith aspecting Neptune can give sexual fantasies/illusions, they can have lots of sexual dreams as well in harsh aspects these can be too intense
Lilith aspecting Jupiter can have a very high libido/sexual life or they may seek/look for that in the future, especially in harsh aspects can make the naitve a "nympho"
3H placements like mars/venus or even pluto can give someone a car/motorbike love fantasy for example making love in the car, or idk kisisng on your partners motorbike is something that is usually involved with these
Pluto or Neptune in the 8H can make the native sexual obsessed or obsessed with sexual tendency! It can go or transform into an addiction over time
9H placements can make good family bounds with their partners family. esp a good sister or brother in law, in case of marriage it can bring more abundency to both natives life
11H love placements like venus,moon/juno can easily have those "friend to lovers" relationship and i knowww this have been said for too long so lets switch a bit, they can create a very deep bound with their partners, i think ppl with these placements fight less or have less arguments because they understand each-other so good, if venus or moon has good aspects it can turn into a really good relationship
I heard some bloggers saying that Saturn in the 7H can be a boring love relationship placement and i felt like i need to say something about this because i dont think is that easy to have this placement in the 1st place, is something that grows overtime and usually gives more results when you become an adult, it gives a good amount or resurance about your partner, for some people even a sucessful relationship, a good bounding with them, more maturing relationships, and a very supportive spouse. I dont think any placements are boring in love topics. Maybe is just the process of waiting for that one person that can be "boring"
People who have scandals or dramas around their relationship can have Libra Mars or mars in the 7H because, is usually coming from other people rather than the partner or relationship itself, is more like people trying to break up your relationship, thats why some people choose to keep their relationships private
In a womans chart, the sun can also represent 2nd marriages or 2nd relationships in case there are some. It is mostly for those who have been divorced
Mercury in harsh aspects to Venus or Moon can make you feel like youre gonna embarass yourself in front of your partner, which is mostly not the case, never be afaird to show your fully self to your partner because if they are right one they will aceept all your silly sides
Friday 11th đ¤đ¤ sounds so dark for some reason, and I love it!!! Hope you all have a good Friday and weekend as well
#dark#october#halloween#astrology#astro observations#birth chart#astro notes#astrology observations#placements#astro community#horoscope#ascendant#astro.com#astroblog#astroseek#astrocom#astrologers#astronote#astro#astro placements#dark astrology#dark aura#dark fantasy#red#mood#vibe#harmoonix
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Heart sweater | B.B
Your daughter got a present for his daddy and Bucky isnât afraid to show everyone what his little girl got for him.
Pairing: Mob!Dad!Husband!Bucky Barnes x Mom!Wife!Reader
Wordcount: 2.033 Words
Warnings: none, just lots of fluff
Authors Note: I couldnât help myself. This sweater is just so adorable and imagine Buckyâs little girl getting it for him. So yes, soft spot, feeling soft right now. Hope you enjoy!
Events: Winds of autumn challenge | Candy corn đŹ a sweet surprise, Balance âď¸ as the equinox approaches, the day and night balance out. Write about finding peace | @the-slumberparty
Seasonal Delights Bingo: fall vibes | Row One-One | soft kisses | @seasonaldelightsbingo | Fairytale Bingo | Row One-Three | Goddess of marriage | @fairytalebingo
Masterlist | Bucky Barnes Masterlist
âDaddyyyy! We gots you a present!" A childish voice echoes through the hallway of the building. Your and your little â big â families home. Others may say that you, Bucky, and your daughter are family, but there are so many more; they arenât from the same blood but with the same big hearts.
Buckyâs men, who not only needed to earn his trust but also needed to earn their place in the family, are more than just his men. They are Buckyâs friends, your friends, and your daughter's uncles. None of them would let anything happen to you or the little girl â not just because Bucky told them to take care, but because youâre a family.
Your little daughter runs further through the hallway until she finally reaches her dad's office door. The second floor of the building is just an office â for Bucky and his men. And since he had an important meeting, he suggested that you could go out with her to get some new toys and clothes.
Of course, your little baby girl didnât go to the toy store first. She loves it, but youâre shopping? She has to get a present for her daddy. She kind of gives herself a treat after finding the perfect present for Bucky â and then she uses all the money she can to get a lot of toys and stuff for herself.
You watch the toddler with amused eyes whenever youâre shopping without Bucky. Mostly Steve comes with you, keeping the two of you safe and just giving you a helping hand so you donât have to carry all of these bags yourself.
âSweetheart,â you chuckle while she already jumps to reach the handle and almost falls into her dad's office. You laugh softly, shaking your head â she is just as stubborn as her daddy when it comes to letting someone help or listen once they get excited.
Buckyâs head shoots up the moment the door swings open. He smiles at his little girl, then his eyes wander further toward you. The ocean blue orbs glistening when his lips curl up into a soft smile â one he reserves only for you and your little girl.
âTake care, my sweet little plum. Donât want ya to get hurt, do we?â He asks, his voice soft but still a bit firm, so the little girl will listen to him. Her eyes â which are just as blue as Buckyâs â roam over her daddyâs body, from his legs up to his face, before she smirks with the widest grin ever.
âWe gots you somethingâ, daddy!â She says, excitedly. Bucky crouches down, resting his arms on his knees while he waits for his little girl to continue talking. âMommy! Daddy waits foâ you!â
You chuckle, looking for the bag in your hand she wants to have before placing all the others down and handing her the one she put her daddyâs present into. Buckyâs eyes move toward you; without any words, he makes sure youâre okay and that you can be without a kiss for a few more minutes while he focuses on his baby girl.
Once heâs sure youâre fine â after you settle down on the couch in his office and sigh softly â he mouths, âI love you, my pretty girlâ to you. And oh damn, you know why you fell in love with that man. He may be a big, feared mafia boss, but around you he is the sweetest, most loving, caring, and perfect husband â and father for your daughter â you could have wished for.
Bucky may be mad because of work sometimes; he may be annoyed, but he never lets it out on you. He would rather punch himself than make you feel like he doesnât appreciate you or that youâre a burden for him. For your husband, youâre the most precious woman, and he will do everything to keep you safe and loved. He does the same for your little girl.
Luckily, Bucky discovered immediately that whenever he's mad, he just needs you, and everything is perfect. Preferably when he can keep you on his lap. His arms are tightly wrapped around your waist and pull you as close as possible while he presses his face into your chest. You will run your fingers through his hair, and he knows heâs safe â no reason for anger or annoyance, just love and affection, so he calms down without needing anything but you.
âSo what do you have for me, my little plum?â Bucky asks, looking with amusement and curiosity at the little girl in front of him. She giggles, her tiny hands grasping his cheeks, and she runs her small fingers over his stubbles.
âScâatchy,â she mumbles and squeezes his cheeks together. Bucky lets out a low chuckle, letting her play with his scratchy stubbles. He knows how much his sweet little girl likes his stubbles; she is just like her mommy loving his metal arm and his stubbles â even though you have other intentions when it comes to his metal arm or his stubbles. But those are secrets that stay in the bedroom.
âSweetheart, you wanted to show Daddy what you got for him,â you remind her when you notice that she got lost in her little game to play with her daddies cheek. But she was so excited to get him his present, plus you know that Buckyâs curious as well.
She removes her small hands and grasps the paper bag again, opening it before hiding her face almost inside of it. You would never leave her with a bag without anyone else around her, but as long as you and Bucky are there, you donât feel scared if she puts her head slightly into it to tease her daddy a bit.
âYeah, my little plum. What do you got Daddy, huh?â He asks, bringing his big hands to her small sides to poke his fingers into her soft flesh. The little girl laughs, throwing her head back while she wiggles in his grip.
She pulls her tiny hands out of the bag and holds a big, white sweater with hearts on it in front of her. Her smile grows and her eyes sparkle as she shows it to Bucky. And the big, most feared mafia boss has the sweetest expression on his face.
His eyes shine, and it looks like the sun is brightening them. His smile reaches almost his ears as he stares at the fabric in his daughter's hands. Buckyâs eyes wander to you for a second, then back to his little girl.
âThank you, my little plum,â he coos, taking the sweater out of her hands to admire it a moment longer. Your daughter watches Bucky intensely â the same intense stare Bucky has if he wants to find out how you think about something. âYou want me to take it on right now?â
She nods, letting herself fall backward into her butt while she holds his gaze. He nods, smirking softly. Bucky leans forward, his big hand placed at the back of her head, and he brings her closer to press his plump lips against her forehead.
âThen I will do that,â he says, getting up from the stop he was kneeling. His eyes land on you, and before he leaves the room to change into the new sweater, he makes his way over to you.
He towers over you, both of his hands finding their way to your thighs, and he leans closer. His lips almost brush yours when he grins at you. âShe chose the sweater all by herself, but you allowed her to buy it, didnât you?â
You shiver under his intense stare and his rough voice. âS-sheâs just really convincing. I know you said you donât want presents, but I guessâ I guess she got that from you,â you giggle and Lena closer to chase his lips for a soft kiss. Bucky chuckles, kissing you once again before he pushes himself up and makes his way out of the room to change into the sweater you and your daughter got him.
Your daughter gets one of her new toys out of the bag and shows it to you. Itâs not like you donât know what she bought, but she loves to show you and explain everything about it anyway.
âMommy, wants book or wants dolly?â She asks, lifting her small arms and holding both up to let you decide which of these she should show and explain to you.
âDo you want me to tell you more about the book you got?â You ask. She nods and puts the doll down, walking with the book in her hands toward you. The little girl places the book on the couch next to you, her small fingers digging into your thighs, and she tries to push herself up onto the couch. âDo you want me to help you, sweetheart?â
âNuuu, âm big girl!â She nods, underlining her words. You chuckle; let her climb up without help. Your hand is still behind her back just in case she falls backwards, but she doesnât.
Once she is on top and next to you, she wiggles a bit and takes the book, placing it in your lap. She just wants to explain why she got the book, whoâs on the cover, and what she knows about her favorite series â the book is about it â when Bucky walks back into the room.
Her eyes widen, and she giggles as she sees her big daddy in this pretty sweater she got him. You smile softly at him, reaching your hands out for him to come closer. âYouâre pretty, Bucky,â you say and run your fingers over the back of his flash hand, then over the fabric of the sweater.
âDidnât know I would look that good in that sweater,â he jokes. Stroking one of his hands over the fabric. And he really does look adorable with his middle long hair, his broad chest, and his big arms â the feared mafia boss â wearing a sweater with a lot of hearts on it because his sweet little plum got it just for him. âSo, my little plum, what do you think?â
Bucky gets down on his knees in front of the couch, looking at the little girl. Her ocean blue eyes roam over him a little longer before she giggles. âLooks pwetty, daddy! Now we can go back to work!â
He laughs, shaking his head. âI thought I could take out my girls for dinner.â Bucky tilts his head. His fleshy hand holds yours tightly while he watches the little girl, considering if she wants to work or prefers to have dinner with the two of you.
âDo we gets my favorite food?â She asks, taking her book and making grabby hands, waiting for Bucky to pick her up. He nods, wrapping his arms around her to lift her onto his waist before he holds a hand out for you to grasp and let him pull you up.
Bucky doesnât care that people could look weird at him for wearing a sweater with hearts on it. His sweet girl got it for him, and he knows that no one will disrespect him â not even when he looks like a sweet puppy with an adorable sweater.
âYou know, babydoll,â Bucky says, looking at you as he wraps his free hand around your waist to pull you into his side. His nose brushes over your cheek until his lips press against your temple. âThank you for letting out sweet plum to buy me such a pretty sweater. Now Iâm wearing your necklace, our wedding band, and my little girl's sweater. I love you, my babydoll, pretty momma.â
Buckyâs voice is low, and he smirks against your skin as you shiver. You knew he would love the sweater â he loves everything you or your daughter get him. âI love you too, Buck,â you mumble before you make your way to the restaurant â letting Bucky show his sweater around to let everyone see how proud he is to have his family, how much he loves you and his little plum, and how much he appreciates you and your love.
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