#i may be projecting but i see a lot of my own autism traits in him 🤷‍♂️

[7official7moose7]

OUGH THE POOR GUY

LIARS.

“I AM STRONGER THAN YOU GIVE ME CREDIT FOR.”

you do not know how much i think about how almost none of the main characters we meet who interact with him tell the full truth to papyrus. OUAGH. i think it hurts a little more when coming from his own brother.

[ceaselesswatchersspecialboy]

Offering an NPD perspective on Ford Pines, because I feel the most common discussions surrounding his narcissistic traits tends to go in two ways — from what I’ve personally seen — and that’s defending him, and denying the mere possibility he may have NPD because it’s seen as a negative, or using NPD as a way to villainise him, and thus demonise NPD. Or, the alternative, this part of his character is completely overlooked.

That isn’t to say I haven’t seen some wonderful analyses on Ford and NPD, rather, I find it surprisingly lacking when his character might be some of the best representation of my own experience struggling with narcissism (alongside Bill).

I believe a lot of it stems from the misconception and stigma around NPD, and the fact Ford goes again common, typically incorrect, ideas, such as showing genuine care for other people, and accepting his failures and where he went wrong in the end, trying to repair his relationship with Stan, and realising that he doesn’t need to be recognised worldwide, as he’s found happiness with his family instead. All of these do not correlate with the media idea of a narcissist, but the fact is, narcissists are no different from any other disorder or mental health issue. We come in all different forms, and the idea we are inherently abusive or evil is such a widespread misconception that it becomes difficult getting help or support.

And that’s why I find Ford so important.

This alone, to me, describes in simple words how it feels to deal with NPD, and though you could argue Bill is projecting here, I think the point is they’re so similar, the lines blur. Both struggle with this same mentality, but Ford is able to reach out, and accept help, and Bill lets himself sink deeper and deeper into his own lies. Also, I’d argue it isn’t Bill projecting, because we sees evidence of this behaviour in Ford in the show and the journal.

He’s someone who believes himself destined for greatness, and won’t accept the bare minimum, such as when Fiddleford suggests he publish his research as is — No, he can’t have that. He has to be the one to uncover this grand theory. He has to have his name cemented amongst the greats. He believes himself to be special, different and more capable than other people, and yet he longs for the company of others all the same. He lives off of validation and praise, and strives for it, his own ego clashing against his lack of self-worth. Bill’s manipulations work on him because Ford eats up this sort of validation — it’s like one big high. It’s confirmation he is special. He is meant for greater things. He was right.

Ford notably struggles with empathy, which is likely both related to his autism, and also his narcissism. Other people simply don’t make sense to him. It takes effort for him to be able to understand people where they’re at, and he is willing to put in that effort notably, taking note of Fiddleford’s habits for example.

He also does struggle with manipulation and being deeply self-centred. A great example being Dipper’s apprenticeship. Ford is very subtly manipulating the situation here, and he doesn’t even notice, which is, in my own experience, common with NPD. He’s also unable to see Dipper and Mabel as, well, Dipper and Mabel, rather putting his own issues with Stan onto them, especially Dipper. He sees Dipper as a younger version of himself, and is trying to point him in that direction, never thinking whether it’s actually right for Dipper, or whether it’s for himself.

I could probably go on, like how he tends to have a black and white view of people, with his opinions on them easily flicking between extremes as a method of coping, or how he panics at the idea of his life’s work being destroyed, despite knowing the dangers.

Whether you agree he has NPD or not, Ford definitely has a lot of narcissistic traits, and yet, despite that, despite every mistake he’s made, everyone he’s pushed away, he gets a second chance. He gets to be loved and understood. He finds happiness. He gets to recover.

It’s very rare that characters with so many narcissistic traits get endings like that!

Ford is not a bad person because he’s a narcissist, he’s just a person, one who’s fucked up, and who’s still learning, and still healing, and that’s why he works. That’s why he’s such a comfort.

On a final note, If you are someone who’s going to argue vehemently against this idea, I kindly ask you simply scroll by!

[stardustcleaningguy]

ok im back to rant abt more saverem twins autism things :P

in my last post (which if you havent seen, was me reblogging @dragons1re ‘s post about the plant powers as a metaphor for autism/autistic traits) i didnt really go into much detail about knives because i was a little too focussed in the fact there is another autistic vash truther out there .. but im gonna talk abt knives now.

like i said before i dont necessarily think that knives has enough control over his outbursts to really be completely proud of them, but also when you are the person known for having regular outbursts and are considered ‘dangerous’ or ‘weird’ by neurotypical society, it begins to become a part of how you view yourself as a person (or at least thats how it was for me as a kid - a lot of my autism hcs are based directly off my own experiences). i mean this in the way that once you have that impression established of you - that you are strange and offputting and scary - its very hard to overcome the perception of others and seem ‘normal’ and so you just kinda give up, and accept your role.

this is how knives’ behaviour appears to me, from an early age people have this perception that hes hard to deal with and has big outbursts of emotion which he struggles to control - and even when he DOES learn more ways to control it, he still refuses to mask because hes continuing to play into the general perception of him by neurotypical (aka human) society. he lets his emotions control him because he doesnt see any point in masking - i mean what would it change if he did try and act normal? the humans already know hes a dangerous monster freak right? i was only able to change from this mindset because my environment and the people around me changed but because of the magnitude of knives’ actions hes unable to do this - until the very end when he finds humans that dont just see him as a dangerous creature but an actual person who just wants safety for him and his brother (but then he gets appled so …)

also im not really saying that knives thinks of himself as a monster, he just knows that humans have that impression of him and instead of trying way too hard to appear normal like vash, he leans more into the role of ‘weird dangerous monster’. hes super scared of humans (the same way an autistic person may become fearful of neutotypical society because of the way they have been treated within it) so thats another reason why he has this whole im super dangerous and evil thing going on even though he spends most of his time napping. top 10 people comitted to the bit

idk this rant MIGHT have gotten a little too tangent-y and i MIGHT be projecting onto knives just a teensy little bit but it was fun to write so wuteva !!!!!!!! (also all of this is specifically discussing trigun maximum - i luuuuv maximum)

[xdesiress]

IT IS ABOUT TIME!!

I will be listing some byi and dnis here, besides some side informations. I'd highly appreciate you reading it if you're new to this blog!

So to not clog, everything will be under the cut.

Greetings you may refer to me as Desireè, Desires, or Galaxy, a Brazilian artist who's birthday is at the 9th of March :)

/I/ use mainly he/they pronouns. I do not mind what you refer to me as, but I'd appreciate these two most.

My Instagram account is mainly for cosplaying now, and SCPTale is used for an SCP x Undertale crossover project I'm working on with a very close friend of ours.

I also have a TikTok but only post MLP content there as of the moment. I DONT USE ANY OTHER SOCIALS. DO NOT TRUST ANY THAT ISNT LISTED HERE.

I like SCP, zombie media, Dark Deception, Skullgirls, Minecraft, Monster High, My Little Pony and more.

I have a Discord server for friends and moots that is SCP themed, anyone is free to join so long as you message me privately for a link! We tend to play games, watch movies/series or draw together in Voice Chats a lot, sometimes we just talk and info dump to each other.

⚠️ I don't mind my Art being used for PFPs BUT YOU MUST CREDIT ME. ⚠️

If I've known you or followed you for a longer while you are free to ask to just add me there and not join the server itself, I don't mind it either. I'd love more buddies to talk to.

Asks are likely to be always open as well as my PMs unless something dire happens, so feel free to shoot a message anytime! I don't bite!

At that.. feel free to ask these Alagadda goobers ;)

_______

DO NOT :

- Reblog my artwork with hate. (Ex; specific character praising and bashing another one involved. I deeply love all the characters I draw and it really saddens me when I see that happen.)

- Ship my Rubedo with Nigredo.

- Whitewash my characters.

- Tag my work with Br/ght. Refer to the BYI section for insight.

- 049-J hate. Just don't, please.

BYI :

- As someone with new access to psychiatrists and medications, I am still trying to figure out just what exactly affects us. It is important to note that the i take BPD and Depression meds and as well am on a list for possible ADHD and Autism. Mood outbursts and unintentional blindness to how I speak is bound to happen and not intentional. Please, let me know if I accidentally say something hurtful.

- Despite having taught myself English for 2 to 3 years it is still not the best and I don't know a lot. Have patience with my grammar and be polite. I am also learning French and Spanish and on the same page in those regards.

- People who still use Br/ight, I /gen won't block you or anything. You can talk to me and everything. But please do not tag my work with his name! Only THEN will I take any action, especially if it's under artwork I make of any of my friends' versions.

- I would likely prefer that people under 15 don't interact with my blog, unless I already know you and you already follow me for a longer time. Then you're chill! I won't block you or anything, it's moreso for your own good than anything, really.

- Talk to me about my hyperfixations and I'll love you for YEARS.

DO NOT INTERACT :

- If you think I owe you explanations about my personal life. What I want to speak of freely I will, what I don't, I won't.

- Basic DNI criteria.

- You hate on furries 'just because'. I'm not one, but I'm not ignorant to people just having fun.

- If you partake on discourse every second of your life and try to drag me into it. I don't have the emotional stability to deal with that type of stuff.

- If you plan on acting like a jerk and drastically change my character designs into something that erases their traits.

MORE TO BE ADDED SOON.

[caffeinated-rants]

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First there's this paragraph that stood out to me:

"It took me until I was nearly twenty years old to discover, if you will, what is easily my most problematic stim: hair pulling. One night, I noticed a single curly strand in my otherwise perfectly straight head of soft, shiny hair, so what did I do? I plucked it, of course. But I never imagined the devastation that would be wrought by that innocent little pluck. I never dreamed that it was the beginning of the end for the hair that had more than once been compared to the hair of a Pantene model. One pull. That’s all it took. One pull, and I was hooked on a behavior that haunts me to this day."

Then just a little further down there was this statement:

"I tried to reassure myself that it wasn’t that bad: it wasn’t like I was stripping myself bald or something, even if I did have a few small patchy spots. When the hair would start to grow back, I couldn’t stand the stubbly regrowth, so I would pull it out all over again. It’s not that bad? I would sit for hours on the bathroom vanity, pulling, just one strand at a time. I was fixated on the slimy little hair roots, and I would keep pulling until I got a root, which I then proceeded to drag across the back of my hand just to feel its slippery wetness. Then I would stick the hair, root and all, to the full-length mirror in front of me until my reflection was spattered with long brown hairs topped off with the silvery, bulbous roots. When I finished, and there was always a point when I knew I was finished, I made sure to spritz the mirror with Windex and wipe away the evidence of my pull-fest. It was bad. I knew it, and while I felt deeply ashamed of what I was doing, I just… couldn’t stop."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

All of this is exactly what I go through, day in and day out. I deeply want my hair pulling to STOP, but no matter what I do I just can't seem to get it under control. I've been shaving my head since around April or May of 2023 and wearing either a wig or a beanie when going out. More often it was a beanie until this past week when I had my sister take me to a professional salon and wig store to get a proper wig fitting, as I'd been wearing cosplay wigs when I wanted to appear to have hair and no matter how flattering the colors were you could clearly tell that it was a wig instead of natural hair. Just as the writer of this piece stated for their own experience, my psychologist also has switched up my medications in order to prescribe me with Prozac. I'm still tapering off the Lexapro I'd been on for almost a year, so I don't see any changes just yet, but hopefully the switch up helps. 

I already have had suspicions as I've gotten to my mid-twenties that there's the possibility that I'm on the ASD spectrum, but I've never officially been diagnosed. My mother doesn't see anything wrong with me, and I'm sure that she'd blow a gasket if she knew I was even entertaining this idea. But truthfully, a lot of the traits are adding up to me and as of right now, I have a closeted self-diagnosis for autism.

Originally, my hair pulling started because I thought I had an ingrown hair. There was a pimple-like bump where the hair strand was, and so I plucked it. The relief from that felt nice, and because I thought it was an ingrown hair, I also dug at the perceived pimple that was left in its place. I made a dime-size bald spot right on my parted hairline. This was back in 2016-17 when I was a senior in high school. I initially thought that perhaps it was stress from schoolwork, as there was massive pressure that came with the mandatory senior project we had to complete, and constantly being reminded by teachers and staff that completing and getting a passing grade for this project was going to determine whether we get to graduate or not certainly didn't help. On top of that, the staff allowed an autistic student stalk me on campus for a good 50% of my time there. He attacked my then-boyfriend on multiple occasions and was only given a day and a half suspension for it. He wasn't being monitored well and his behavior was explained to my mother as a "hard puberty". He would ask invasive questions about my intimate life with my boyfriend and whether or not I watch hentai in my spare time. Things got to the point where he would actively search for me during passing periods and brunch/lunch if he saw that I wasn't in any of my usual hangout spots, and I should have following through with my threat of "taking things into my own hands" (ie. going to the police). This individual jumpstarted what would become the generalized anxiety disorder that I now have to be medicated for. Because of this, my entire outlook on my hair pulling was thought to be a result of these two issues combined.

Now, I believe that it's partly due to stress but is, in fact, a potential autism stim. I can't get myself to stop, and just as this person had in their experience, I can't handle the stubble coming in when it's in the areas I pull most. They are coarse and often feel ingrown, causing sore lumps that I ultimately end up picking at. I have had scabs on the right side of my head for almost a month now because I keep going at that spot. I also have kept my baby blanket despite it being practically in tatters, but it brings me comfort and helps me sleep. I use it as an extra pillow these days, but I also will rub parts of the fabric between my index finger and thumb. I've never understood why I did this, and my mom also said when I was little, I would always rub the red corner of this blanket on my nose all the time. That's another flag for being an undiagnosed autistic.

[spider-xan]

Going back to that old werewolf OC from 2003 I've been re-visiting and re-working lately, one of the most interesting things about going back and re-reading old RP logs I wrote for him is how I definitely did not intend for him to be autistic at the time - I don't think I even knew what autism was or that it existed back then - but I absolutely ended up unintentionally writing him as autistic in a way where if he was a fandom character, I could see people reading him as autistic-coded, even though that reading would actually fall into personal readings bc coding requires authorial intent.

And like, interestingly, when I say he reads as autistic to me in retrospect, I don't mean in the way I feel like it's commonly used in fandom to mean he's cute and quirky and has a fun special interest, but he like, regularly did not get social cues or a lot of jokes and would respond seriously to them, was blunt in a way where he didn't mean to be rude or mean and he didn't get why other people thought so, and the main way he stimmed when stressed was the kind that people would find annoying and disturbing rather than cute bc there's a degree of self harm, and it was something that definitely brought him into organic rather than pre-planned IC conflict with other characters who found him ICly frustrating to interact with bc of it.

Anyway, now that I'm self aware and more experienced as a writer as a writer, I'm working with that part of his character intentionally, but it's also one of those things where looking back, I'm like, okay, I am not the kind of person who approaches writing characters as omg they are me!! bc I have zero interest in self inserts or projecting myself onto characters, even if I may sometimes use my own personality traits or interests to fill in blanks, but, like, what does this mean, is this a case of my writing subconsciously revealing things about myself years ahead of time bc it all makes sense now.

[nekrotastikextasy]

Thank you for answering !!

Yeah. I usually go for distractions myself when I'm feeling homicidal. I had a really bad episode recently where that wasn't working though. I ended up having to stab boxes and such to get it out of my system. I've been just asking people who experience homicidal ideation what their coping mechanisms are to see if there's any that could help me when it gets bad again. I wish you luck with your own ideation as well ^^

I do have a plan in place for in-patient hospitalization just in case, though I do worry about how I'd be treated. I know you talked about being met with a lot of hostility in response to both your ASPD traits and your homicidal ideation.

As for your diagnoses, I see! So it was fairly gradual, and you got diagnosed kinda one at a time, beginning with self-DX and concluding with medical recognition. Definitely sounds like you had a rough go at it though, with all the long questioning and then the abelism. I'm sorry you dealt with that.

But icic. So PDNOS is specifically for an unclear or generalized mix of symptoms, whereas if someone does clearly fit the criteria for multiple PDs, they would just have those multiple PDs. I was unsure on if that was used for broad unclear mixes of PDs, ans/or as like occasional shorthand for 'a big huge mix of PDs'. The idea of a diagram demonstrating which symptoms belong clearly to each disorder is a good idea. I may do that myself to make sense of what I deal with, though that may be a project for the future haha.

And yeah I definitely don't think I'll meet a professional who'd want to diagnose me with all four. As it is, past therapists/counselors I've seen labeled me as potentially having traits of cluster Bs, but were hesitant to definitively say I had any of them. My current main therapist suspects many of the symptoms I think may indicate a cluster B may actually just be generalized trauma responses/C-PTSD type stuff as it interacts with autism, and she said it can be hard to distinguish symptoms like that when there's so many elements in play. Which I think is fair. Though I also don't think it's insignificant that I fit all the criteria for cluster Bs so closely. So idk.

I had someone tell me a while back that in cases like this, it's probably best for me to focus on identifying specific symptoms, and then work on dealing with those, instead of putting all my energy into trying to wrap them all into nice little disorder labels. Which is probably the path I should take. It's tricky because like being diagnosed/medically recognized would validate the shit I deal with, but with my symptoms fitting so many disorders, diagnosis would be hard to get, and it's just not worth my time to worry about that, especially when like my homicidal ideation is flaring up so severely rn. Like I should spend my time learning effective coping strategies for that instead of trying to analyze the symptoms that really don't bother me that much/aren't as big a problem in my life.

But. Yeah. Overall, I may never get what feels like a neat, satisfying answer to why I am the way I am. But I can do my best to roll with the punches and focus on what's necessary.

Thank you again for answering my ask! And don't feel bad at all for the long reply lmao. I'm guilty of that myself. I appreciate your advice and experiences! It was helpful to read ^^ I hope life treats you alright!

Hiii, I saw your message about asks, and I wanted to ask if you had any specific coping mechanisms for homicidal ideation. Mine has been awful lately, and my usual coping mechanisms aren't working as well anymore.

Also, you noted that you have NPD, BPD, and ASPD traits. How'd you figure out you had all of them, and not just a 'PD NOS' type situation? /gen I myself fit traits of all four cluster Bs (going through all the official diagnostics, I fit the criteria for all four), and I'm struggling to figure out if like. I might have traits of each (like described it'd be ASPD traits, BPD traits, HPD traits, and NPD traits), or if I'd be considered to just have general cluster B traits, or if I'd have 'PD NOS', or if I would straight up just have all four PDs, etc.

REMINDER/TW

Some of this is personal experience, it won't be the same for everyone. I will mention a mental hospital I went to. I am not a professional.

About the coping mechanism for homicidal ideation

First of, thank you so much for the ask! To answer your first question. I sadly don't have any healthy ones. But I have one that doesn't harm others. Usually when I have homicidal ideation and I'm at home I go to my room and try to distract myself by reading and watching a video. That on it's own is good I just tend to isolate myself for a few hours until the feeling has completely passed. What's unhealthy about this is not only the isolating but also repressing of the emotion (anger/rage wtvr.) Because it will come back eventually and then it's over 😭 I do plan on working on better coping mechanisms in therapy but the last time I talked about it with a therapist I was not met with a friendly reaction at all.

So my Tipp is to take time for yourself when you can and try to distract yourself. Just try not to make the same mistakes I do and don't isolate yourself and try to let the emotion out in another way (like writing, drawing, sport) at a later point in time.

How did I figure out I have NPD, BPD and ASPD traits?

I knew I have BPD since 13. I did the test for personality disorders where you fill out a sheets of paper with over 100 questions. The results showed that I had a high score for BPD. But since I was 13 I didn't get it diagnosed. NPD is more recent. At the start of 2024 I found myself looking at the diagnostic criteria and symptoms for npd for reasons I can't remember. I went over them and compared it to my expirence only to realize that I fit every but one diagnostic criteria that is "arrogance, haughty behaviors, and attitudes." (I do experience it to some degree I just often don't tell people what I'm actually feeling/thinking for personal gains). After a lot of research I decided to self diagnose with npd but even then I was still in denial. Towards the end of last year I was in a mental hospital to work on my "bpd like symptoms" among other things. There I finally did the personality disorders test. At first I did the test I'd already done when I was 13. Then I sat down with a psychiatrist for 6 and a half hours. We went thru all clusters and all personality disorders. She asked me questions and I had to answer and give examples. Once the results came back it was clear, I have NPD and BPD. I got diagnosed with both as the score for both, especially NPD, was high. So that explains how I figured out I have NPD and BPD. But what about my ASPD traits?

Aspd is more complicated and way more recent. While I was suspecting NPD since may last year and BPD for years I only realized my ASPD traits about 2 months ago. During the whole testing I was very focused on my BPD and NPD symptoms. Especially after I got done with the section of npd and bpd, all I could think about was thoes two disorders and my symptoms tied to them. I unintentionally ignored all other symptoms I was showing and that paired with the psychiatrist who basically skipped over aspd during the testing process for whatever reason resulted in me not really being able to talk about anything relating to it. The next few weeks after I got the diagnosis all that was in my mind was NPD. I was struggling with the diagnosis and what it means for me. Due to the diagnosis I was paying more attention to my behavior, thoughts, feelings and urges. After some time I was able to think about other things than NPD but I still payed attention to my behavior and such. Over time I saw things in myself I had not seen before as I just considered them a part of me, and/or something that's completely normal. They weren't and while some of it fit NPD or BPD other things didn't. I was confused. One night I was thinking a lot so I went to the person watching over us that night (reminder, I'm still at the mental hospital at this point). We sat there and talked for 2 hours until it was 12am. I talked about my symptoms, my need to control others and the situation generally, my homicidal ideation, not being able to understand what is right or wrong and generally not understanding social norms, my non existent remorse and regret and so on. The person I was talking to listened to me and at the end asked me a question "Do you feel emotions?" This question absolutely destroyed me. Because while I felt the urge to say yes, it didn't feel right. My next few days were spent thinking about that question, I asked people with ASPD how they expirence emotions. It took time until I found a answer to the question but either way, the symptoms where still there. I wasn't sure what to do with all of this new information that hit me all at once. I decided to talk to my therapist there. And while she did recognize the ASPD traits her reaction was far from nice. To put it simply, I was almost thrown out the clinic and in the next therapy session she told me I'd be released way earlier than expected and planned. Her reasoning was that I have too many problems. She said until I get released we'd just work on making sure I don't relapse into dysfunctional behaviors at home. So I didn't have a opportunity to talk about it again with her.

I am still kind of in denial about my aspd traits even tho I know I fit a lot of the criteria and I'm not talking about thoes that overlap with bpd and npd.

How do I know it's not PD NOS?

First of, the official diagnosis. But outside of that it isn't a mix of different traits without filling enough diagnostic criteria for a personality disorder, I fit all the criteria for BPD and NPD separate from each other. Yes my BPD is influenced by my NPD and the other way around but even so, I still fit the diagnostic criteria enough to get a diagnosis. If I did a testing for BPD and ignored the ways NPD influences it, I'd still fit the criteria. When I have time I'll draw what I mean to visualize it and explain it better.

General cluster B traits, PD NOS, or all four?

If you fit all diagnostic criteria for all personality disorders you probably have all four personality disorders. But it depends. As an example on how strong the symptoms are, you might experience all symptoms of a pd but a professional will call it traits as some of the symptoms aren't strong enough to be considered a pd on it's own. Everyone goes in the direction of specific personality disorders but it is considered a personality disorder or symptoms when it's exstreme. (Not saying you don't show all cluster B traits!)

A professional will probably be very hesitant to diagnose you with all 4 PDs. They might look for other similar disorders first that overlap. In the end it's in the hand of the professional what they diagnose you with. But my original point stands, if you fit all diagnostic criteria for aspd, bpd, hpd and npd, then you probably have all 4. Tho please note that I'm not a professional!!!

This got really long I hope I could help you somehow anon! If you or anyone has any follow up questions feel free to send a ask! Have a great day ahead and thank you for the ask!

[chocolatepot]

Some disjointed thoughts on diagnosing fictional characters (particularly with autism) ...

So it's generally understood that you can't diagnose fictional characters or historical figures with any disorders or diseases, physical or mental. You don't have access to all the details. You can't run the kinds of tests you need to run. Fictional characters in particular may not have a coherent set of symptoms at all - they're not real people.

(This got long, so it's under a cut.)

However, the thing that has me thinking is that autism and ADHD are ... collections of traits. There is not an autism chemical in the brain that you can check for to see if a living person is autistic (or an ADHD switch) - psychologists observe children and talk to adults to figure out if they have enough of the traits in the bundle to be considered autistic(/ADHD). And that is mainly for the purpose of determining if they qualify for assistance of some kind, not to make an absolute proclamation. There are certain issues that will get them to that conclusion faster because they more clearly require that assistance, like being non-verbal, but that doesn't make those traits more or less essential to the condition itself.

And the fact is that a lot of the traits are generally considered part of normative human personalities. Probably everyone diagnosed as an adult has spent a lot of time considering themselves insensitive, stupid, careless, forgetful, messy, selfish, etc. Being able to pin these negative traits to a diagnosis often helps people stop castigating themselves because now they don't have to blame themselves for these things - it's not my fault, I don't forget to do my homework/misunderstand what people are saying to me/etc. because I'm a bad person on a moral level, it's because of the way my brain is.

I feel like a lot of the hullabaloo over self-diagnosis comes down to the idea that people with negative personality traits are trying to wriggle out of being held culpable for them. You see it from both sides. I am constantly forgetting things because there is something wrong with my brain that prevents me from retaining that information OR I only forget things when I'm deliberately not paying attention: you need to stop claiming that there is something preventing you from retaining information and accept that you are careless and choose to forget stuff. It only counts when you spend $1000 on a psychological evaluation and basically list the symptoms you found in the much-derided social media posts and have a doctor confirm that yes, those are all signs of ASD/ADHD and yes, you do seem to be describing incidents where you displayed them. (And also talks to your mother with you and the whole thing is incredibly embarrassing and your insurance decides they just aren't gonna pay for it!) But do we actually need to parse out who's "allowed" to be forgetful, or to have any other traits that can be seen as symptoms of neurodivergence? Isn't it possible that we are all at the mercy of our brains' mechanics to some extent? Again, there's no autism chemical that makes a diagnosed autistic person's natural bluntness more "not their fault" than the natural bluntness of someone not diagnosed.

Or, to bring it back to fictional character diagnoses, which is where this actually started, this turns into the idea that fans are trying to help the character get away with something by imposing a diagnosis on them, often with a side accusation that people are just projecting their own disorders onto characters they like (which in fairness we ND folk do joke about doing). But the thing is, if you've been dealing with your neurodivergence your whole life, you have quite a lot of expertise in what it looks like, and again, all psychologists do to diagnose ASD or ADHD is observe and compare what a patient does and says to what they know about how ASD/ADHD present ... which is what fans do when they watch a show or movie or read a book and come to the conclusion that a character is ND.

This feels unfinished but I can tell I have a headache coming on and besides, my lunch break is ending, so toodle-oo.

[undertale-data]

[Image Description: an Undertale chat box with the name "Frisk" in its center, between a talksprite of Frisk's monotone face on the left and the EGG, a sun, and "WED", taken from the Dating Hub, on the right. End I.D.]

Frisk received a total of 59 votes, meaning that 2.2% of responders picked them as a favorite. However, these numbers only tell part of the story. In our analysis of which characters people create content of, Frisk was the third most popular, beaten only by Papyrus and Sans. This implies that a lot of fans care deeply about Frisk, but for whatever reason, they are not usually fans’ number one choice. This makes our data on them somewhat limited, but there are still some interesting repeated sentiments. They were also often brought up by people who claimed they liked too many characters to choose, so we analyzed those responses as well.

Many loved the ambiguous nature of Frisk’s character. The empty spaces in their characterization allow some fans to project onto them easily.

Some go as far as calling Frisk “a blank slate for the player,” although this is not technically true, as they are revealed to be their own person at the end of the True Pacifist route. This reveal was pointed out by a few responders, and many more love that their character raises interesting questions about how much of the game is based on Frisk’s choices, and how much is the player’s.

Frisk is also canonically nonbinary, which is very important to many responders. Our demographics analysis revealed that a very large portion of the Undertale fandom is nonbinary or questioning their gender, and it may be representation like Frisk that drew them into the game. Others noted being surprised by a nonbinary main character, and only realizing that being nonbinary was an option at all because of them.

There are also many fans who love to see the variety of fanon interpretations for them. Most commonly, fans pointed out the common headcanons that Frisk is nonverbal and/or autistic.

They tend to be demonized less than Chara, but many fans do find it interesting to explore their role as the catalyst for both the best and worst endings in the game. Many enjoy exploring the moral questions this brings up,

Many love that the few things that the game does reveal about Frisk show that they are a complex character with a distinct personality, although their backstory and motivations are never revealed. They are often seen as a cute little kid with an unhappy past, who makes mistakes even when doing their best, but, despite everything, continues moving forward.

Highlights: (under the cut)

I love how their personality is often portrayed in the fandom : very stone faced and ‘dry’ but silly, confident, and clever.

amazing child filled with compassion and determination

The interface between the player and Frisk makes for a fascinating moral question, about free will, and how much you can expect a child to do

Frisk was also my first real introduction to trans/nonbinary people, and some fanart/writing of them introduced me to what autism could look like outside of mainstream media. (I'm a trans and autistic teen, for reference.)

We went through what Frisk went through and felt at times determined and hopeless as them. They held us and we held them and after everything we’re still us.

i like the variability of interpretations for both them and chara. they can be sweet or an asshole (plus many many more traits) and it can all fit into canon!

Frisk may be more open to fandom interpretation, but honestly, that's probably why I like them the most. I like imagining a scrappy young kid doing their best, committing mistakes, living and laughing... I like the fanon character traits that have established themselves independent from what few canon facts we know. I like the few sprinkled-in tidbits we DO get. A character so malleable and yet with defining borders.

Because of the choices, everything Frisk does, can change the route of that world, and the little details that happen with their choices, I love that because, let everything open to happen, do you want to make friends with Toriel? you can, do you want to put hot cats on your head, well Sans do that for you, do you want to have a bad time? You can.

[Image Description: A wordcloud in the shape of Frisk’s full body sprite on a white background. Their face, hair, and feet are brown, their shirt is blue and purple, and their eyes and mouth are black. Their face has been left free of text. Some of the most visible words are: Frisk, Player, Love, Kind, Kid, Person, and Game, which represent the most common words in the essays people wrote about them. End of ID]

Read the full list of responses shared with permission by clicking this link.

[transmasc-wizard]

@my-writblr here!

What do you want to see more of in autistic characters? Obviously not just a story about their autism, but characters that are autistic with a story all their own, but what else are you looking for? I have a main character who is autistic and I want to make sure I'm representing them properly. Someone who hasn't read my writblr posts about him, but is reading my WIPs picked him out as autistic and I was very happy that they related to him like that! So I wanted to see what else was going for him or could be going for him that would help others relate to him.

But more than that, I want to make him believable. He's got his hyper focus, an inability to process sarcasm without a little explanation (which he gets from his love interest who is always down to help him understand what the other MC's are saying). And he has the ability to astral project, travel to the spirit world, and hear the living cities and help heal them. His theme song is "Go the Distance" by Disney's Hercules OST, and he's based a lot of Teal'c from Stargate SG-1 in how he speaks, which is straight forward and to the point because he doesn't see the point in beating around the bush like I am. Is this a believable character? Obviously there's only so much you can glean from this, but I love talking about him. He's on of my favorite sons.

Ok, this has been in my ask box for over a month now, almost two, because autism things are really hard for me to articulate. I tend to get extremely defensive, personal, and prickly about many autism-related things. There's a reason "questions about autism & autistic characters" isn't actually on my "what writing questions will I answer" FAQ, despite me being a (now diagnosed) autistic person. At the time of making it, I wasn't sure if i wanted to answer autism questions (I do, now).

That being said, he sounds... fine. Don't infantilize him, make sure he's more than just his autism (especially because those are some more stereotypical autistic traits that he has), don't demonize him, don't call him broken, and don't imply he needs to be fixed, and you'll probably be fine.

A note: The two main groups of traits an autistic person must have are difficulty in social situations/interactions and restricted & repetitive behaviours (such as need for routine, special interests, and stimming). Every single autistic person is going to have those on some level, though they may mask them sometimes/often. (Obviously autism is more complex than that, but that's a very basic version of the diagnostic criteria).

As for what I want to see, that's... more autistics. Autistics that aren't just white chishet male math experts with no social skills.

I want to see queer autistics. Autistics of colour. Multiply disabled autistics. Mentally ill autistics.

Loud autistics. Autistics that don't talk. Autistics with a lot of friends. Autistics that don't have many friends. Autistic artists & creatives. Autistic love interests. Autistics that aren't seen as "broken".

Touch-seeking autistics. Touch-repulsed autistics (that aren't forced into a hug by the end). Autistics that like being autistic. Fidgety autistics. Autistics that are loved by people who love them and their autistic traits, not in spite of them. Funny autistics. Autistics that are allowed to be weird and supported in that. Autistics that would burn autism speaks to the ground, that's 99% of us, where's our rep.

I just want to see more autistic people. I want to see autistics who show their autism in different ways, because autism is a spectrum, that's literally in the name.

Other autistics, feel free to add on. Non-autistics can reblog, but quietly.

[gh0st-patr0l]

ADHD in DSMP

So about a week back, I made a post about Karl Jacobs (a bit of a passive aggressive one, I’ll admit, but I think it was justified), complaining that a lot of the ‘criticism’ I see about Karl is actually rather insensitive towards his ADHD. I got a lot of responses to that post, and the most common sources of confusion I saw were:

People not understanding what I was saying they should avoid being judgmental of, or-

People who didn’t know that Karl had ADHD or didn’t understand which behaviors were caused by it.

First of all, Karl has confirmed that he has ADHD.

(NOTE: Yes, I know he said ADD. ADD and ADHD used to be categorized as separate disorders, but in the most recent edition of the DSM, it was decided that they are both simply subtypes of the same disorder- ADHD is the correct technical term. ADD is still sometimes used as shorthand by some practitioners to diagnose primarily-inattentive ADHD, but it's a bit outdated.)

Secondly, that original post made me realize that a lot of people who may be well-meaning may genuinely not fully understand ADHD and its symptoms as well as they want to or think they might. If you aren’t aware, Karl isn’t the only one in the DSMP with ADHD- to my understanding, both Technoblade and Dream have confirmed that they have it as well. So, I thought it would be helpful to put together a comprehensive crash-course on ADHD symptoms and how they effect people’s behavior!

Now, before we go further, I want to address something- as I said earlier, I saw some people unsure of whether certain behaviors are ADHD or “just his personality”. I feel the need to point this out above the read more so people will see it. To answer this question, as someone with ADHD;

A lot of times, it’s both. ADHD is a neurodevelopmental disorder, meaning that it’s caused by the way your brain developed from birth. A lot of the symptoms and effects of ADHD are extremely influential towards the way we think, act, and behave, to the point where “symptoms” and “normal behavior” really don’t have a clean differentiation. This is why it’s technically classified as a ‘disorder’, instead of an illness. While certain aspects of it can require treatment, the condition itself as a whole is not something to be mitigated or eliminated- it’s a part of who we are as a person. This is also why sometimes, even if you don’t have ADHD, you’ll look at certain specific behaviors or experiences and go “Oh, but I do that too!”. A lot of ADHD ‘symptoms’ are just a bunch of normal traits or behaviors, but in combination with each other and some actually problematic aspects, form the appearance of the disorder.

So, what are you allowed to nitpick about it? Well, there’s no real ‘authority’ on this, and even if there was it certainly wouldn’t be me. But if you want my opinion? Nothing.

See, here’s the thing- what I was trying to say when I made that post was not that you can’t be critical of Karl. If you want to say something about his Actions, his Ideals, or the content he creates- sure, go for it, that’s fair. I will agree that there are some very valid and constructive points to be made. But when you post ‘criticism’ about the way he speaks, his interests or preoccupations, his personal behaviors? That’s not criticism. That’s just judging someone.

And you’re allowed to think that stuff! Nobody can control what annoys or bothers them. It doesn’t necessarily make you a bad person. But you don’t need to be vocal about it. You can keep your mean thoughts to yourself. And if you do make posts or communities or whatever about judging someone for things they can’t change about themselves, don’t call it “criticism” or try to morally justify it. It’s not productive or righteous, it’s just rude. Nothing else.

Anyway. Back to Education!

The following will be a descriptive list of visible ADHD behaviors, using Karl’s behavior as examples.

I feel the need to add a disclaimer here- I am not a mental health professional. However! I have ADHD myself, I have taken some psychology courses and done a Lot of research into this stuff, and I’m the daughter of a therapist with access to a DSM. While I’m not an expert, I’d like to think I’m fairly well versed and knowledgeable on at least ADHD. (That being said, if by chance anyone who Is a professional sees this post and notices mistakes, by all means let me know and I’ll fix it!!)

WHAT IS ADHD?

You’re here for the behaviors more than the science, so I’ll keep this short and sweet. ADHD is Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (Known in the past as Attention Deficit Disorder). Despite its name, the root problem of ADHD is not in the person’s ability to pay attention, but their brain’s capability to manage itself. In simple terms, people with ADHD have a lot less control over what their brain does and wants. This results in some behavioral differences along with some personal challenges, namely a difficulty with attentiveness and self-discipline.

Now, onto the symptoms!

ATTENTION

This is perhaps the most visible and pervasive of the ADHD symptoms, hence why it’s the namesake. Inattention is a lack of focus and an inability to stay present and occupied with certain tasks or thoughts.

Because ADHD impairs self-management of the brain, people with it have an extremely hard time directing themselves anywhere but where their brain instinctively wants to go. This results in inattentiveness and the easiness of distraction that is often mocked or stereotyped for people with ADHD.

Here are some examples of how Karl can sometimes display his inattentiveness;

When he has an idea that he seems passionate about, only to drop it or switch to something totally different without warning soon after (either forgetting or getting bored of his original idea).

When he sets out to do something like a build, works on it for a short amount of time, and then immediately gives up or gets someone else to do it.

When someone else is talking and he totally zones out. (NOTE: While I wont make a whole section for it because it’s not easily observable, maladaptive (constant and intrusive) daydreaming is a common ADHD symptom as well!)

It’s important to remember that the whole problem with ADHD is that we can’t control when or what we focus on. When someone with ADHD zones out during a conversation or activity, it doesn’t mean they’re doing it on purpose, and they likely don’t mean any offense! We often are trying our best to listen or participate, but our brain just wont cooperate.

However, inattention is not the only way ADHD effects our focus. There’s also what’s called hyperfocus or hyperfixation, which is when we are so absorbed into a single subject, task, or idea that it is extremely difficult to get us to think about or do anything else. This is usually because our brains have found something that is getting those satisfaction chemicals flowing, and it’s clinging to that with everything it’s got.

People with ADHD will often experience brief periods of hyperfocus. Think of how Karl talks about spending hours straight working on a build or project without eating or drinking, or how he’ll sit down to play a game with someone and end up going six hours without even noticing.

There are also hyperfixations, where someone with ADHD becomes extremely preoccupied with a certain subject, topic, etc. for a period of time. These can be short term- personally, my hyperfixation can sometimes change as quickly as a couple weeks at a time. However, it can also be long term. Karl has been obsessed with Survivor since the second grade- not to mention his memorabilia, rambling, and constant references to Kingdom Hearts.

HYPERACTIVITY/STIMMING

This is a BIG one for Karl. I should clarify; ‘stimming’ is not a technical term, and in professional situations these behaviors are just referred to as Hyperactivity. However, I personally like the term stimming much more and find it far more accurate to what the behaviors actually are, so I’ll be using that instead for this post.

If you’re not already familiar, ‘stimming’ (derived from ‘stimulation’) is an unofficial term used to describe consistent and abnormal patterns of physical and vocal behavior typically expressed by people with ADHD and ASD (Autism Spectrum Disorder). This includes things that people usually call fidgets or tics.

(NOTE: There are differences in how people with those two disorders stim. This post will explain stimming specifically from an ADHD perspective! ASD stimming is caused by very different factors and presents itself in much different ways. Do your own research if you’re curious!) 

There are two major observable forms of stimming- physical and vocal. Karl expresses both VERY often! I’ll use examples for each type;

Physical Stims: Flapping his hands/arms, jumping up and down when he’s excited, twisting around into odd positions in his chair, throwing, hitting, or tapping things, standing up and pacing around when he’s hyped up or laughing, twisting his rings, etc.

Vocal Stims: When he gets excited and repeats a certain phrase incessantly (Think any variation of “I’m popping off”), making certain repetitive noises while he’s focused on something or bored (”la la la”, the meow-noises, the weird heart-beat noise, etc.), singing or humming, tongue clicking.

It should be noted here that it’s pretty common for people with ADHD to get “stuck” on certain phrases or noises, and be unable to stop repeating them (reminiscent of echolalia, a symptom of ASD, but not the same thing). Think of how Karl might sometimes keep making a weird noise for an extended period of time even though it’s not that funny, or that one time he was physically struggling to keep himself from singing the Bakugan theme. These repetitions are completely impulsive and trust me, we usually know how annoying it is while we’re doing it, but we physically cannot stop.

ADHD stims are caused by the fact that the barrier between our brain and body is much weaker than a normal person’s. Because of this, most ADHD stims are actually very positive expressions of joy, excitement, or enthusiasm! Y’know how when you get excited, you feel like you wanna jump or dance? The ‘hyperactivity’ of ADHD is basically just that, but we don’t have the self-control to Not do it.

Stims can be caused by negative feelings like overstimulation, but in ADHD this is not nearly as common. Usually, the most negative reason we’ll stim is when we’re bored- in that case, our brain isn’t getting the Constant Stimulation that it naturally wants, so stimming is a way to make our own.

Whatever the cause, stimming is natural and impulsive. While different people experience it to varying degrees, those who regularly stim typically have little to no control over it. Suppressing stims is very hard and very frustrating to do.

Besides that, like I said- ADHD stims are often an expression of joy, excitement, or enthusiasm. They’re a beautiful thing that shouldn’t be seen as shameful or annoying!

BEHAVIORAL DIFFICULTIES

ADHD is a disorder which causes a lack of self-control. Naturally, this means that people with ADHD are inherently reckless, impulsive, and struggle with a lack of self-discipline that they cannot fix.

Of course, people with ADHD do still have some level of self-control, and they are still responsible for conscious, long-term behavioral patterns and decisions. However, in regards to most things, they are much, much less capable of controlling themselves than an average neurotypical person is.

These are some examples of how this will often present itself in Karl;

Excessive rambling, dragging on a joke or conversation when it could and should probably have been dropped, etc.

Speaking over or interrupting other people (NOTE: As someone with ADHD- THIS IS ALMOST ALWAYS UNINTENTIONAL. I know it can seem rude or annoying but I promise, 90% of the time if someone with ADHD talks over you, they either didn’t realize or physically couldn’t help it. Please try to be patient!)

Lack of awareness towards social cues (NOTE: Unlike ASD, in which the person is incapable of/has problems fully understanding social cues, ADHD results in a lack of awareness. For whatever reason, we’re often just not paying close enough attention to pick up on things like body language, tone of speech, and facial expression as well as we would normally.)

Indecisiveness and overthinking

Bluntness, lack of subtlety

Unintentional dismissiveness, accidentally ignoring things/people (NOTE: Again, this behavior is purely accidental. In this case, it’s usually just the person genuinely not hearing or processing things.)

Making noises, speaking, joking, etc. at inappropriate times

There’s probably more, but I think you get the idea by now. A lot of the time, behavior which results from ADHD can be seen as rude, lazy, dismissive, or otherwise intentionally harmful. In reality, we just aren’t wired to navigate common social interaction with grace.

In Karl’s case, he’s clearly an incredibly sweet, empathetic, and kind-hearted person, if the various close friends who have talked about him are to be believed. Just because he talks over people or makes a poorly timed joke, that doesn’t mean he meant any harm. 

I think that’s about it for how much I wanted to point out! You can do more research if you’re curious, but I feel like this post should be enough to tell you what to keep in mind and be understanding about when talking about/making judgements on Karl, and other people with ADHD.

[gb-patch]

Ask Answers: May 15th Part 1

It’s been longer than usual since our last answer session, so I’m answering a ton of questions today! It’s so big I split it into two parts. Thank you for the patience on getting a response to these.

Thanks for reaching out to us with your questions and kind words ^^!

Sorry if this has been asked before or isn't something you can say but is there anyway for Cove to confess in step 4? I wanted him to confess in step 3 and followed all the steps to make him do it but ended up texting my family instead of Cove at the end.

Yeah, Cove can confess in Step 4!

Hello! I heard that Cove is on the spectrum, albeit undiagnosed. As someone who is ND, this makes me UNBELIEVABLY happy. I literally was brought to tears! Thank you for that!

Out of curiosity, will Cove be diagnosed in Step 4? I have a strong feeling y’all won’t make it a HUGE deal/make it out to be negative, so I’m not worried about that whatsoever! I’m just curious just he’ll off handedly mention it? Or will it just not be touched upon at all (which is ok!)?

Either way is ok, I’m just curious!

I’m happy it made you happy! Admittedly, Cove simply being someone with autism that grew up not being diagnosed was something I included for myself. I didn’t really think anyone would notice or ask about it, aha. But players did start to have questions about his traits, so I started to talk about it outside of the game. It’s great to see it get such a positive response and now I do feel like having it be a non-topic may have been the wrong choice and bringing it up would’ve been good in terms of having positive representation for that. I don’t know if I’ll find a way to mention it in Step 4 now, with how far along the game is, but I am at least thinking about it when originally it wasn’t something I really even considered.

Hey!  Just wanted to say thank you for Our Life.  It's been a bright spot and a needed escape in what's otherwise been a crummy year.  I know you just did a Q&A post but I figured I'd ask anyway.  Was just curious about Step 4.  Will it be similar to the other Steps in that it consists of several different moments or will it just be one long sequence?

Step 4 is shorter than the prior Steps because it’s just an epilogue rather than a full arc of a story. It’ll consist of scenes that all happen in a set row one after the other. There won’t be a collection of Moments to choose from. But it’ll still be very sweet and fun.

¡hola!, you see, first I want to say that I love Our Life! (°◡°♡) and I have 2 important questions, would Cove cry watching titanic? and what is the saddest part according to him? (sorry for my english) 

Titanic would make him cry. He’d probably think the parts showing people who aren’t able to make it to the life boats/are choosing to stay and go down with the ship were the saddest.

Hello, I wanted to ask how much you earn with creating games? Like is it possible to make a living? Thank you >< <3 

How much I earn varies a lot month to month based on Steam sales, Patreon backers, and how many projects are in full production at the time. It’s also hard to say how much I make historically, since that also changes dramatically year by year. But I do earn enough to work on these games full time! I really appreciate all the support that allows me to do that.

Hey!! I was wondering for the 18+ Our Life moment, will there be an emphasis on safety/comfort for all involved? I feel like there  would be just going off of what the rest of the game is like, but I wanted to ask 

Yes! Cove is a nervous boy himself and also super cautious about doing anything the MC doesn’t like, so clear consent from both is absolutely needed for anything to happen. It’s a conversational sexy times Moment with stops/starts so the two can talk about how they’re feeling, rather than a heat of the moment just going for it kind of thing.

Hey!! I was wondering how long the wedding dlc would be? Will it be broken up into moments, or just one big event? 

It’s one long series of scenes all in a row rather than a collection of Moments to pick from. It’s the shortest and the least expensive of all the DLCs. It’s not super crucial to get and those who aren’t into big weddings can totally skip it without worry.

HELLO AMAZING DEVS 👋 i am hopelessly in love with the worst guy ever (jeremy king) and because of this i have a really stupid question: does he really hate people who are nice to him? TvT he’s too cute to be mean to istg it’s a miracle JB held the urge to be consistently nice to him bc just look at his FACE he is so cute! thank you for jeremy’s route it’s so lovely (and awful bc he’s scum 11/10) it gave me so much laughs LMAO i hope you guys have a good day!! 

Haha, thank you. He doesn’t hate them but he’s certainly not pleased with them. Jeremy is either uncomfortable with or annoyed by people being sweet on him, depending on how they approach it. He’s far more comfortable with jerkiness. It lets him relax and he can be himself without it being a problem, since he’s also a jerk. He feels a level of guilt being such a little punk to kind people, not enough to be a better person but still.

Has Cove dated or been interested in someone other than MC? 

Nope! He stays single over the course of the game if he’s not with the MC.

Is Step 4 more mature? Or it's gonna be set in similar atmosphere as Step 3? 

Step 4 is a similar atmosphere as Step 3. Though, it’s actually kind of less mature-topic heavy than Step 3 since it’s just a ‘hey, let’s check in on the gang to see what they’re up to’ style epilogue rather than a story arc with serious issues.

will there be new music for now and forever?? or will the old our life music be reused? 

It’s gonna be a brand new soundtrack. We’ll be opening up a job position for that soon.

Hi, is it okay if we use the assets in Our Life (like the sprites) for fanworks or fan content content, like edits? 

Sure! Just as long as you don’t use the assets made by those artists to make money.

Quick clarification on Step 3 choices: I hope I didn't come off rude (because I LOVE the game, really!!), I was just curious because the intro threw me off at times. For example, you could choose how you felt about Elizabeth in Step 2 (Dinner), but during the Step 3 intro, it says that you got closer to Liz and I didn't get a choice in it. 

For the example, it can’t be helped that you’re closer to Liz in Step 3 than you were in Step 2 because she’s inherently closer to the MC regardless of whether you liked her or not in Step 2. Her feelings are out of your control and the game isn’t so dramatic that you can push her affection away and not let her bond with you, haha. But ‘being closer’ can still be relative. For some people maybe that means you’re best buds now and for others it might just mean you’re not fighting all the time any more. If there’s other parts you want to mention, feel free to let us know.

Did the illustrator for Our Life change? 

We have many OL artists! The main artists who set the game’s style haven’t changed, but there’s multiple other artists who help finish assets.

So Miranda's type is confident and outgoing, huh? So...does that mean Terri's her type?? 👀 

Haha, sorry for the late reply on this. As you might’ve seen in our post yesterday- yeah that is her type.

Hey! First, I just want to say I've really enjoyed how detailed OL got with gender identity and sexuality and how respectful the topics were handled! It's been so wonderful to play since the experiences could be close to my own (I'd be lying if I said I didn't tear up at parts). Second, I was wondering, would future games explore the topic of polyamory? I'd love to see more visual novels allow room for that and I saw you've explored the topic before.

Keep up the amazing work! ♡

Thank you! We do want to include polyamory in at least some of our future projects. Floret Bond, which might be what you’re referring to when mentioning how we’ve explored the topic before, is on hold unfortunately. So right now I’m not sure when something might release or what will be the first game of ours to come out with poly relationships (we might do something else before FB is done). We’ll have see how things ends up coming together.

Hey um. I feel like im not allowed to ask this on the private discord cuz people will yell at me but why is there so much focus on OL2 and not finishing OL1 stuff? I like the new people but i kind of want to finish cove's story and get derek and baxter stuff first. didn't people pay for it? 

I’m sorry, I don’t understand entirely what’s making that situation a concern. There’s a channel in the discord for critique where no one is allowed to comment back. People can voice things they’re worried about without any way for others to push back on it. And the two teams working on the OL games are different. We try to post pretty often about how we’re hiring brand new people to start on Our Life: Now & Forever. The OL1 team is all still working on OL1 like normal. There’s only more updates on the Patreon for OL2 because the expansions to the first game are mostly script-based at this point while OL2 is just starting to get all its art, which means there’s a lot more to show off as previews.

Also, there was a Kickstarter for the first Our Life, if that’s what you mean by people paying for it. But one of the stretch goals was to start Our Life 2 early, before fully completing Our Life 1, so that the new game could be out sooner. It wouldn’t make sense to stop doing OL2 work because that would be going against what backers were promised. Maybe you didn’t get the full story before and hopefully this clears it up!

Hello! I know it's up to every player but.. What is your recommendation for playing order? Did you ever had any timeline  events planned? 

I didn’t make the events with a planned timeline. The events got made simply as I had ideas for them and then I just kind of organized them from left to right on the screen in an order to space out more dramatic ones between more lighthearted ones. Any order the player wants to go with is totally valid!

Hi! It's Step 4 a paid dlc or update? And how long it's planned to be? Ps. Love the game! 

The Step 4 epilogue is free! The Cove Wedding DLC does cost money, though. Those are planned to be shorter than the usual Steps/DLCs.

Will we have options for what sort of job the MC might have by the time step 4 takes place? 

Yeah, you can. It’s not super exact or detailed, but there are options about it.

Is there a pandemic in Our Life world, or is it just in a better timeline with no pestilence? 

Our Life is pandemic-free! That didn’t exist when we began working on the project and it’s not something we’d like to feature in this story now that it has unfortunately come along, aha.

Hi, you said that you can play tic-tac-toe or hangman with Cove in Boating if you're sick/scared but I keep getting tic-tac-toe. Am I doing something wrong?

After being sick/scared you have to continue to be upset/unwell. If you calm down and decide to just chill you’ll end up playing tic-tac-toe.

Hi, GB Patch! Since Lee was initially commissioned to only appear in two Steps does this mean she won't appear in the Wedding DLC? I really like her character so it'll be a little weird to not have our cousin at our wedding, aha.

She is gonna be in Step 4/the wedding DLC after all! We’re still working with her creator to make sure it fits with what they wanted.

Is Sunset Bird based on a real place? Asking for a friend, not trying to move there or anything. 👀

It’s based on small beach towns in So-Cal, but not one specific town you could go see in real life, I’m afraid. It’d be nice if it was real, though.

—– —– —– —–

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[moonagedaydreamohyeah]

I just want to say, that there is a big difference between being blunt and being mean, that I wish everyone would remember, especially when talking to autistic people.

And I’m not just saying “trying to be blunt isn’t an excuse to be mean” or “being mean is bad, while being blunt isn’t” though that’s obviously also true.

What I am saying is that being blunt or direct shouldn’t be perceived as being mean, and that applies to both ways in communicating. An autistic person might be very direct, but unless they explicitly tell you so, you shouldn’t assume that they are implying something negative or are trying to be mean, arrogant or disrespectful. In fact, some autistics tend to be open-minded, matter-of-fact and forgiving, so the chances are that they are literally just stating something, and will be sad and/or confused that you thought they were being negative or mean.

When speaking to someone who might be autistic, be blunt without being being mean about it. If you need them to do something, if something they are doing is annoying you, is breaking some unwritten rule or is making someone sad, assume that that wasn’t the intention (I think this goes for neurotypicals as well btw), and let them know in a direct, but nice way.

Here are some examples:

“I would be more comfortable if you did/didn’t do/say ‘...’ as it is making me feel ‘...’”

“You might not know this, but according to this unwritten rule, you should/shouldn’t ‘..’:)”

“I know you may not have noticed, or didn’t do it on purpose, but you doing/saying ‘...’ made me uncomfortable because of ‘...’”

“I love that you are so interested in this subject/I get that this worries you a lot and can be hard to not think/talk about, and I’d like to help you find solutions, but right now I need to talk about something else or just be quiet :)”

“Would it be possible for you to get this specific thing done by this specific time? For ‘....’ reason, it would make me happy if you did that, or for ‘...’ reason, I think you should do that, and I will be annoyed if you don’t do it, without having good reason.”

Say it before you get annoyed. And think about whether your annoyance is justified. If the person wasn’t deliberately going against you explicitly stated wishes, do they deserve being the victim of the fact that you are feeling an impulsive, negative emotion? Some autistics/ADHD people have RSD (rejection sensitivity disorder) or have a kind of intuitive black and white perception of things, and learning that they unintentionally made you annoyed or angry with them, may therefore be very hurtful and difficult for them to get over quickly, as it will lead them to feel that you don’t like them the way they are.

Not saying anything, or only implying and then expecting them to figure it out themselves, can come across as way more mean and disrespectful, as you are not giving them a good chance to choose to apologize or to act in a way that doesn’t make you/others uncomfortable. And it can feel really uncomfortable and confusing. Also, this person might already be obsessing about trying to get things right, so it will be a huge relief for them to be able to rest assured that if they do get it wrong, somebody will make them aware of it.

Important: what I am not saying, is that you should then say everything that is on your mind, and expect people to change everytime they do something that rubs you the wrong way a little bit. If it really makes you uncomfortable, you can let them know that they are making you feel this way, and you can even request that they change it.

However, if they are not being annoying on purpose, or may be expressing something in a way that actually makes you misunderstand their intention, and they know that it will be too harmful or demand too much energy to change, or it makes them feel that they have to be someone else around you and that makes them feel wrong or lonely, they can choose to deny your request, and maybe you’ll have to find another solution or a compromise. The point is that by being direct and explicit about them, you are giving them the choice, the chance to clear up misunderstandings, and making them aware.

Nobody is perfect, and it’s not often that we meet someone where we like everything they do all the time.

If you want to have a relationship with someone, you owe it to them to either try to accept or learn to love the traits that differs from yours and that may not be your favorite flavor.:)

Aand a disclaimer: I mention autism and ADHD, but I can obviously only speak from my own experience. And i mean, the way I see it, this goes for every type of person, but I don’t know, I might just be projecting. (On the other hand, you can never know whether the person you are speaking to, actually isn’t neurotypical).

If I said something that you disagree with, feel very free to let me know, by following the steps mentioned above⬆️ :)

[innermort]

*** disclaimer: this is a very long diary type of entry that is probably quite boring for everyone else and may be ignored. it's merely a very lenghty epiphany I just had about my life and myself and I had to type it out for me, to lock in the thoughts, if you will. it was pretty therapeutic tho. 🙃 ***

10/Sept/2021

I just had the realization that I'm in the process of redefining every aspect of my self and my life.

I quit smoking cigarettes from one day to another exactly 2 months ago tomorrow and went from a heavy to a casual party smoker.

I rarely ever smoke weed anymore (plus when I did since quitting tabacco, I rolled with herbs) and now made the conscious decision to take another long break, so it doesn't interfere with my weight loss again. I get the worst munchies and have no self control when I'm stoned. I'm talking "5000+ cals in one sitting" type of binges. I'm not tolerating this kind of self sabotage anymore.

I re-discovered edblr. Yes. I know. Not the healthiest habit to get back into but it's the only thing that has actually helped me gain the motivation and willpower to put a stop to my raging sugar addiction and instead, an actual effort into losing weight again. Besides, I'm doing it in a much more careful and "responsible" way now (high restricting, taking supplements, no strict/exact calorie limit, very light to no exercise (okay, to be fair the reason for that is mainly my injured knee but still), letting myself eat/drink more than planned if I feel my body needs it). And let's not forget that I've literally been binging every day for the past 2 or 3 months. My diet nearly exclusively consisted of chocolate, pastries and pizza. Literally. I've gained 10 kgs (22lbs) during that time. That lifestyle was just as unhealthy, if not unhealthier.

I finally got to hang up and use my calender. Due to my ADHD (self diagnosed for now), I'm very forgetful and unorganized - at least in my private life. That's why I made the decision to get a big calender which I can use as a semi To Do/Buy list and appointment/meeting/bill reminder. Since I'm glueing a sticker to each day I got through without binging, I'm looking at it pretty much every day anyways. Plus, it's a motivater to not binge (reward that inner child)! Overall, it's helping me become more organized and put together which are two areas I've been lacking in in the past years. So far, I've been mostly using my phone notes but I usually write something down and immediately forget about it if it's not a grocery list or a To Do list I'm actively working through on that same day.

I have my first appointment at a psych ward since I was a teen. It's just a phone call and first get to know conversation but it's better than nothing and more than overdue. I'm finally taking the first steps towards getting diagnosed and being eligible for therapy. I'm sick of feeling like a victim of my own brain, I just want to be better. I deserve to be better.

I'm hungry for knowledge again. I deleted Tiktok from my phone because of how big of a distraction it was and because I realized that even though I'm being bombarded with new information everyday, I'm not learning anything. Our brains can't even comprehend the amount of information given in that short time span. Nothing sticks. Sure, you find out about some pretty cool stuff on TT depending on what kinda fyp you have but for me personally, it was just hours and hours of mindless scrolling in the end. It's crazy how addictive it is, too. Even despite the fact that I was already at a point where it didn't even give me that quick dopamine quick anymore. It felt boring and repetitive and I was merely doing it out of habit.

So, I got rid off the app. I started watching documentaries again. Mostly about gut health and mental illnesses like ADHD, Autism, BPD, Narcissm etc. Like TED talks or interviews/discussions by and with professionals/experts/diagnosed people. I'm back to not just craving but actually consuming something with substance, something that gives me more knowledge and insight on a topic. Something I actually want to know more about.

I realized and accepted that even though I am a creative mind, a fully creative job might just not be for me. I'm learning that maybe I'm the type of person who does something entirely different in their free time than what they do at work. And that that's very much okay. I noticed that at my job (this was the case for every job I ever had), my mind seems to work differently. When people expect me to do something, I have the needed pressure and motivation to get it done. I could also observe in myself that at work, I enjoy organizing/sorting stuff, I'm a fast and independent learner while I'm also excellent at training new employees, I'm much more detail oriented than in my private life - overall, it came to my attention that I might not actually be the ever chaotic forgetful mess who can't form a logic thought - or I can at least recognize that this is merely a part of me and not what defines and limits me as a person. I realized I actually like straightforward work, I like working alone and I like working precisely. When I was younger I would have never used any of these traits to describe my dream career. I would gag at the idea of working an office job and now I feel like this would actually suit me very well. Especially the working alone part would mean feeling less drained at the end of a work day and still having the energy to hang out with people I actually want to see. This is an extremely valuable lesson about myself that I finally seem to have learned.

After this big sub- and now concious evaluation about myself I'm also finally taking actual steps towards a possible career. I bought a course and worked through the first 2 lectures today, taking notes and writing everything down neatly for 3 - 3 1/2 hours (in total with breaks in between). I even got a notebook specifically for this new life project. I'm excited to learn. I feel scared, too. This is something I've never done before but I'm telling myself that trying won't hurt. I have my main job as a safety net, financially nothing can happen to me. I can only learn, even if I fail. And time will pass anyways, whether I get my ass up and put in the work or continue to be unhappy with what I'm doing without trying to change anything.

Speaking of finances, I also started taking those more seriously now. I stopped using my credit card (I was in negative numbers constantly, big numbers like -300 to -800€ due to constant overspending). I set up standing orders for my monthly fixed costs to make sure bills are always paid on time. Due to my forgetfulness and ADHD freeze I would often forget to pay or postpone paying bills until the reminder came in the mail and led to me having to pay on top or generating debt. I still have a little bit of debt to pay off but it's thankfully not a dramatic amount. I also have a second bank account for savings now where I transfer 200€ to every month. Even the simple act of calculating my fixed costs to see how much I can use for what was something that was desperately overdue. What I still have to do is sort out my receipts and write everything down in a housekeeping/budget book. And my first ever tax return. I am very much dreading both of these. 😃

Anyways. Wow. I really needed to type this out. I have the very harmful tendency to look at all the negative stuff and only focus on what I don't have and don't do. I really needed to take a long, deep look at all the things I've been changing around in the past couple months. A lot of it really passed me by until now. It's crazy but I really feel like a complete failure when my body isn't looking its best and it makes me blind for everything else. So, thank you to myself for reminding me that I am actually making a lot of progress, even if it has been in areas other than my fitness and looks. They're just as important (from a healthy brains point significantly more important, obviously) and deserve to be noticed and celebrated.

Conclusion: ❤️✨YAY, ME✨❤️

[spectrumed]

4. body

Do I have body issues? Well... yeah. Who doesn’t? I absolutely do not like being fat, that’s something I’d change about me. And I probably should bulk up a little, go to the gym. My diet isn’t terrible, I don’t eat any fast food, but I could still always eat healthier. More greens, less beans. But most of all, my biggest body issue is that I don’t really associate myself with my body. My mind feels disconnected from my body. The day scientists invent a way for us all to live as brains in jars on wheels, I’m there standing in line for a chance to become all cerebral. Being physical, it’s just so messy, so awkward, so uncomfortable. You feel pain, you feel embarrassment, you feel horny. Nothing good comes from having a body. If you were just a brain, you could go on thinking and calculating and just generally having a good mental time. Or you’d start feeling suffocated and trapped trying to move your limbs and realising that they have been all chopped off. Hmm… Maybe it’s more complicated than I initially thought.

I don’t understand people who enjoy physical activities. Let it be clear before we delve into this long rant of mine complaining about all things gymnastic, this is not particularly an autistic trait. In fact, there are plenty of autistic people who may excel as athletes, their drive and obsessive personality traits becoming quite useful in developing that discipline that is required to fully commit to becoming an all-star jock. Not all autistic people are reprehensible nerds. Some autistic people are actually quite sexy. Some even have abs. But that’s not me. That’s not my clan of autistic people. I like drawing maps. I like thinking about things. I like making cocktails. The only part of my physical body that I like to put strain on is my liver. Don’t make me go on a run. There isn’t an armchair in this world that I wouldn’t want to sit down in, even the ones that used to be owned by old chain-smokers that have that awful aroma that sneaks into your nostrils and makes you worry about second-hand lung cancer. Sitting is great. I like sitting. Also lying down. Lying down is good.

Am I lazy? No, I don’t think so. Maybe a little, but here’s the thing. I can’t control the things I obsess over. There’s a great deal of overlap between autism spectrum disorder and attention deficit disorder. If you’re reading this and you’re a fellow friend on the spectrum, you may have gotten diagnosed with both. One of those rare times in my life I have attended group therapy, more than half the group were diagnosed with both. I, however, am not. But seeing as the two conditions are so intertwined, it shouldn’t come as a surprise that a facet of autism involves difficulties in trying to focus on something, or even trying not to focus on something too hard. If you were to judge my tenacity, my ability to keep going, based solely on how I perform during physical tasks, you’d think I was the least resolute person on the planet. But then you’ll find me, some time later, staying up until four in the morning drawing another map. A map that’s really just a different take on another map that I drew earlier, that itself was a reworked version of a previous map that I drew but didn’t like, that actually began as a second iteration of one map I drew that was actually wholly different, that was based on a map of Europe but if Denmark never existed. How many maps have you drawn Fred? Why don’t you go mind your own business, you nosy ferret.

The DSM-5 (the fifth edition of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders. You can think of it as something akin to a bible of psychology, which is definitely an inflammatory way to refer to it, but I’m gonna go with it! Because I’m a wildcard, and that’s just how I roll,) includes this section as part of its diagnostic criteria for autism spectrum disorder.

Highly restricted, fixated interests that are abnormal in intensity or focus (e.g., strong attachment to or preoccupation with unusual objects, excessively circumscribed or perseverative interests).

Now, I personally don’t relate to that at all. There’s nothing abnormal in my intense love for maps. The fact that maps aren’t as widely cherished as they ought to be is a fault of others, and I refuse to acknowledge that this may be a part of my character that could be perceived as quirky, or out of the ordinary. But, still, for the sake of argument, let’s presume that I can get, at times, excessively circumscribed. I’d like to say that I’ve only ever engaged in excessive circumscribing in my privacy away from onlookers, but I am afraid that I may have allowed some of my excessive circumscribing to happen in public. I definitely do apologise for that. I will try to do better in the future. But you never know when you’re about to experience some excessive circumscribing. The best you can do is keep it limited.

I don’t know how neurotypicals work. So, you don’t feel these kinds of obsessions? These moments of intense focus? These fixations? Then, you lack passion? Are you heartless? Soulless? Or are you just weak? Are you too feeble to hold steadfast working on a project all night long? To lose touch with your sense of hunger, your need for sleep, and all contact with any other human person? My fixations may come across as strange, but to me, your lack of fixations come across as bizarre. The world is endlessly fascinating. Have you never felt that compulsion to just fully immerse yourself in a topic that allows you to forget about your physical body for just that moment in time? The body cannot hold me. I wish to absorb as much information as I can. If I could astral project, by gods, I would astral project. To decouple your consciousness from your mushy brain for just that little bit, to go soaring across the landscapes, to explore the cosmos, just free of all things corporeal, that would be swell. How terrible isn’t it, when you’re deep in research, learning all about the mystical religious practices of the long-dead hierophants of the ancient world, to be drawn back into the present by the sudden need to urinate? There is something so dreadfully mundane about possessing a human body. If only we could all be celestial beings allowed to just be without the biological needs associated with having flesh and blood and bone and bladders.

I am not religious, nor am I spiritual. I do not believe that there is an immaterial world that lies above the material. I do not believe there is an astral plane. I think that one of the terrifying things about living is knowing that we do not possess such a thing as an eternal soul, that all things are temporal, and that ultimately, we have to come to terms with that. It’s not so terrible. In some ways, the temporal nature of life can be its biggest blessing. All things must pass. Sure, that does include the good times, like that vacation you spent as a child wishing that it would never end. But it also includes the bad times. The heartbreak you feel from a failed relationship. The grief you feel after the passing of a parent. The depression some of us are burdened with. Some days are worse than others. But they too will pass. One of the remarkable things about the human body is its ability to bounce back from injury. To change and evolve in ways we sometimes find unthinkable. The brain, likewise, is transformational, capable of incredible developments. We’re not fixed in stone. We’re not eternal. Which is a good thing. It is what allows recuperation and progress. I should be thankful to my body for being there, even when I’m not. After all, isn’t your body your temple?

I am able-bodied. Am I disabled? There’s naturally a lot of questions that surround how we ought to understand mental illness or neurodiversity in regards to disability. Does autism spectrum disorder count as a disability? Well, yes, it can be considered a learning disability. It is certainly something of a handicap, you are experiencing struggles that most people don’t experience. But to your average layperson, your typical dullard who spends their time watching reality TV, drinking beer, and being happy, what counts as a disability to them? Would they see me and think I was disabled? I’m not in a wheelchair. I don’t walk with a cane. Though I will occasionally “stim,” make small repetitive moments with my hands or legs, I do not exhibit any kind of physical symptoms. If I told them that I was disabled, they’d scoff and tell me that I’m just making it up for attention. They’d say I’m probably just trying to mooch off the government, scoring welfare checks while doing nothing to contribute to society. I’ve got all my limbs. I am not sickly. I am actually quite strong, due to being a big and tall man, I am able to carry quite the load. So, I have no reason to not be a fully productive member of society, right? And yet, here I am, feeling at most times utterly perplexed by anything physical. Probably because I am just lazy, right?

I don’t think laziness is a thing. What is laziness supposed to actually be? Tiredness? If a person is perpetually tired, then they’ve likely got a sleep disorder. To call them lazy would be callous. There are plenty of overworked people that get called lazy, especially by tyrannical overseers who think of their charges as mere workhorses whose only purpose in life is to toil away in the factory until the day they die. Intolerable parents who see their terminally sullen child and instead of wondering what is making them so upset decide to deride them for their lack of ambition. Are you lazy when you are procrastinating? No you are just being a tad irresponsible, maybe, deciding to skip out on chores in order to play video games or masturbate. But you’re not just doing nothing. People generally don’t enjoy doing nothing. We need something to occupy ourselves, to fill that vacuum we all feel whenever we’re just sitting still. I am someone who appears to be comfortable just sitting still, but that’s because I’ve learned, since a very young age, to entertain myself with my own thoughts. To fantasise, to daydream, to do anything I can to escape from the void that is doing absolutely nothing. Boredom, that’s terrible. Boredom is existential dread. Of all the motivations that drive humans, love, spite, jealousy, or pride, I think the need to evade boredom is one of the most prevalent. Humans would rather experience electric shocks than sit alone in a room being bored.

I am not lazy, I am merely… excessively circumscribed. For as much as this may be a specific diagnostic criteria for autism spectrum disorder, I think it is also a common trait amongst all humans. There will always be within us a pull to do something other than the thing that we’re really supposed to be doing, that does not make us lazy, that just makes us terrified of boredom. Sure, you know that you’re supposed to mow the lawn, but that's just so dreadfully tedious, you just would rather be working on perfecting your new stand-up comedy routine. Thinking up jokes to tell on stage is so much more stimulating than cutting grass. And who cares if your lawn grows a little wild? Lawns are a scam, imposed by fascists to make us think grass in its natural state is ugly. All grass is beautiful, whether it is cut short or it is allowed to grow long. Do the thing that fulfils you. Allow yourself to become immersed in passion, to forget about those things that hold you back, the little silly things we’ve convinced ourselves is important. Stay up late, if you wish. You’re gonna kill it on open mic night, bud!

Yes, it is a problem when your obsessions grow so singular that you forget to feed yourself. When you forget personal hygiene, when you become trapped in your own apartment looking like some feral rodent caught in a cage. Like always, the key is moderation, and I know that from time to time, you may have to entertain a boring task or two. Clean your room, brush your teeth, trim your pubic hair, try to give an impression that you are taking care of yourself. If for anyone, do it for your mother. She will be happy seeing you looking like a civilised individual, wearing clean clothes and not looking malnourished. But don’t ever chastise yourself for being lazy. Laziness is a sin that we’re all guilty of, and if we’re all guilty of it, is it really a sin? Or is it just part of what it means to be a human? To be a messy creature made out of flesh and blood and bone and the occasional bladder. In the end, I’m more happy than displeased at having a body. It’d be much harder to type on a keyboard if I didn’t have fingers.

Still, I wish I wasn’t fat.

[elizabethplaid]

Dr. Pierce’s Book of Fortune, 1937   --- Libra horoscope

@vintage-tech asked for my analysis of this Libra horoscope thing. My insights are based on opinion and balancing out what I’ve read from different quacks and my own experiences. Your mileage may vary, don’t void your bladder where prohibited, etc.

Lots of blather and a transcription of the images’ text at the end. Forgive me on the formatting, both in transcript and this whole mess of a post. I have too many thoughts and not enough organization

This sounds somewhat typical of different Libra interpretations I’ve seen.

“medium size, well-muscled, and graceful”

good health “but not very robust”

“kidney ailments”

(3/5) Medium height (not width), have been called graceful in the far-past. Partial credit there. Decent health, sure. Kidney ailments, yesssss. And that’s a thing I’ve heard before.

See, there’s an “alignment” of different body parts to different signs. “Sexual Astrology” by Joanna Martine Woolfolk (1979) notes these regions as erogenous zones. From what I’ve discussed with folks, the template fits. I’ve also seen it applied as “health troubles”, though I’m less certain about that correlation. (Don’t harp on me about a source on that image. I don’t have the patience to track it down right now, and it’d probably take foreeeever.)

In my experience, the kidney and/or bladder problems has been a thing. But I’ll also posit that I’ve had a lot of lower back muscle pain, as well, in the past.

“work carefully”, “conserve energy”

plan ahead

like to lead, and others will join

(3/5) Yes and no to all of that. Experience and mental health has shaken some habits and cemented others. I don’t make strict plans, but going without a plan is scary. Sometimes planning and such is a way to avoid a situation, too.

I don’t mind “leading” a small group of friends, but I know the perils of group projects. I might’ve been more inclined to these things when I was younger, before dealing with high school etc. It’s the “people pleaser” side of me, because I don’t want to be rejected.

logical mind

foresight, intuition

“persuasion, rather than by force”

“broad-minded and tolerant” in social situations

(4/5) Anxiety has ruined my logic, but I do go through many steps of (sometimes irrational) thought as I think my thunks. Foresight and intuition can also mean being observant and figuring out that step-A leads to step-B. That said, the few really strong gut feelings I’ve gotten haven’t been wrong. Especially when I’ve ignored them. *eye roll at self*

Definitely have been “broad-minded and tolerant”, even before being exposed to bullies. Still trying to do better, and I know I’ve improved over the years. Again, it can stem from wanting acceptance from others.

“good writer or speaker”

“warm-hearted and kind”

“sensitive to what others think of you”

“will make and keep many friends”

(3/4) All of these are very accurate, except for the keeping friends part. It could be my own mental health (eg social anxiety), moving around over the years, and/or realizing some people aren’t as appealing as they used to be - even if the relationship was good.

When I see the other person is no longer putting in the same amount of effort, I withdraw. But, in the past, I’ve put in more effort than I should have. So that was kinda doomed. Again, “people pleaser”.

“get on well in married life”

easily see multiple sides to a situation

“like and understand children”

(2/3) I’ve had a relatively easy time in relationships, but they’ve also been few and far between. Communication and understanding what I/we want have been my/our hurdles. There’s an autism-spectrum element that sometimes makes understanding other people tough, but I have been able to see different sides to things. The less a situation personally impacts me, the more sides I can see.

The children thing is less a nurturing side and more “these people are friendly”. Some of it’s autism-related, some is empathy regarding how helpless kids can feel/be. I never related well to my same-age peers, and adults loved my “old soul”. But I also know I would not feel comfortable having a young child rely on me.

“born diplomat”, ass-kissing while at least partly sincere

“fond of society”

“popular with the opposite sex”

“good wives and mothers”

bad at business

(4/6) I like to socialize, though it can be very draining, and shallow relationships are not fulfilling. Libras “are known to flirt” and be sensual or romantic, according to other sources. I think it’s a desire to feel wanted - especially as tied with the stereotype of libras liking “luxury” or “fine arts” etc. “I don’t need this person in my life to survive, but they are a delight to be around.” (Broken record: “people pleaser” again.) I do love to flirt, even pretend-flirting, where we both know nothing more will happen. It’s a safe-ish form of adrenaline rush.

The “good wives and mothers” thing feels double-edged. (This counts as 2 points.) Like, I can’t function as a wife or mother in ways that keep the day running, that keep life flowing. I have the emotional capacity, though. I’ve fondly imagined myself as being the “confidant aunt” to people, regardless of actual family connection. (I am not close to my nieces/nephews, but that’s not also a literal physical distance thing.)

Bad at business? I would cite that they mean the “more likely to buy impractical luxuries that spark joy, rather than buy a sturdy and practical necessity” stereotype. I’m bad at business for DIFFERENT reasons, sir.

-----------

Overall: 19/28 - Decent analysis, not as “accurate” as more recent publications. “First and last paragraphs” are only partial “bunk”.

I’ve got my own baggage that hinders this analysis. Can’t quite separate symptoms from traits, especially as my demeanor changes over the decades. Some of this also took “reading between the lines” to gather what they meant, to connect to stereotypes said in later analyses. 

This vintage libra analysis seems mostly like other examples I’ve read. The notes of being a good mother (not father?) feel out-of-place. Just that I haven’t seen them in other analyses. Plaid-dad is also a libra, and he has always been doting and supportive. He also gets along with kids so well, and I’ve observed that all my life.

One of my libra friends, Jodee, used to work with kids. She’s was like a big sis to me right from the start of our friendship, and she’s like that with her other friends. I’ve seen libras have big hearts, sometimes not knowing how to channel all the love they want to give to others. (Different forms of love, I mean, too.)

Logical and business-related notes are also unfamiliar. The stereotype is often that libra is more dreamy and romantic, at the expense of practicality and reality. “Champagne and caviar dreams”, as the saying goes. Indecisiveness is another big stereotype. Seeing the different sides and options can be a drawback.

The article is 80+ years old, so it makes sense that some of the stereotypes have changed. Perhaps later economic booms brought some of them to the front? Societal priorities also changed, along with expectations and roles that we might acknowledge, even if we don’t embrace them.

----------------

[Transcription start]

Libra - September 24 to October 23

The compensated sign of Libra, the Balance, controls your fate. If you are typical of the Libra people, you will be of medium size, well-muscled and graceful. Your health is good but not robust. You are likely to suffer from kidney ailments, if care is not exercised.

You work carefully, conserving your energy. You must plan each step before you take it. You like to lead in any enterprise, and can make others join you.

Your mind works logically and accurately. You have foresight and some intuition. You get what you want by persuasion, rather than by force. You are broad-minded and tolerant of social and religious matters.

You are a good writer or speaker. You are warm-hearted and kind. You are sensitive to what others think of you. You will make and keep many friends.

You will get on well in married life, because you can see the other side to every question. You like and understand children perhaps better than the people of any other sign.

The men of Libra are born diplomats. Many of them become statesmen, politicians, salesmen, and managers of big enterprises. The women are fond of society and usually popular with the opposite sex. They are good wives and mothers, but rarely succeed in the business world.

[Transcription end]