#i make tons of stuff negative :/
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wickjump · 18 days ago
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lvl20 cross is my no.1 enemy btw. if i see him there will be an unspecified lethal weapon in my paws and it will be pointed in his general location
#slightly incomprehensible rant in tags#he was made by a pro which becomes obvious when you look into him At All#utmv#not tagging cross even tho i wanna cause like#neg stuff idk#character neg#i guess??#idk i just wanna be hashtag mindful#cw suggestive#in the tags#ive seen ONE SINGLE FIC where he was done well. ONE. ONE SINGLE FIC.#EVERYYYY OTHER ONE#HAS LIKE. DREAM BEING THE UWU HELPLESS BOY AND CROSS BEING GRR ALPHA MALE WHO PROTECTS HIM/SOME NEAR-RABID ANIMAL WITH A BIG DICK NOW IG??#lvl20 cross..... my ENEMY.....#my beloathed#people who make him into a character i can actually tolerate are god(toby fox)'s bestest angels#i fully believe there are tons of people out there that have done him well but after a while i just skipped over any fics with him in it#lvl20 cross could have been great#because like the horror that could come from when you breach a lvl no monster's body was built to endure#purely because you Killed Everyone In Your World#that could be fucked up cool stuff!!!! but no!!!! all he is worth now is to be led on a leash by dream i guess!!!!!!!!!#not a puritan in any sense of the word i have an 18+ account (which is painfully inactive whoops)#nothing wrong with sexing a character up or warping them towards sex appeal for the sake of 18+ content. i am fine with that#but like. lvl20 is just. blatantly brutalizing cross into big dick energy violent murderer guy who needs to be muzzled by dream#shakes you by the shoulders CROSS ISNT A SADISTIC MURDERER HES JUST EDGY!!!!!!!!!!!! HE FEELS SO MUCH GUILT!!!!!!!! COME ON!!!! HE WOULD NO#LIKE TO KILL PEOPLE PERIOD!!!!
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nullians · 3 months ago
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It’s actually insane how fandom in general has become so scared of making weird and dark and ugly works. Like I look at myself and see how I have also subconsciously adapted this instinct to self censor and make things “marketable” and it’s making me want to crawl out of my skin. I need to get weirder and worse and more off-putting hello
#I need to write a proper Spectra&Gus meta bc it’s been cooking me how people don’t Want to see the insanity in them#argh#d0 stuff#negative#d0 smashes the keyboard#like yes#Gus’s devotion and loyalty are extreme and these feelings make him do stupid things that he is absolutely aware of being stupid#but let’s not pretend that these feelings go both ways in their relationship#Spectra (for like. the majority of the New Vestroia except the maybe last 12 eps?) sees Gus as a convenient tool#like Yeah he is like. a person and all that but Spectra doesn’t Interact with him when it doesn’t concern his business so#and also yes. he gives Gus a level of autonomy that one might not exactly expect from how usually these relationships go but#one Has to question if it’s bc of his goodwill or bc he is safe in his knowledge that Gus would never leave him#which. fun and sick and makes them sooo compelling#I would also argue that Spectra/Keith don’t even miss Gus when he ‘died’ as a person at first#but as the second pair of hands for work#like it was quite funny to see Spectra give instructions to air only to be reminded that his minion died#but it does rise the question of why hasn’t it happened before or in any other situation#(which I must say I really dig because yes. Spectra has always been centred around his ambitions so ofc this is where it would hurt first)#but yeah. sth sth Spectra only starts his journey of Actually giving a shit about Gus and acknowledging his importance to him as a person#by the end of nv#you could still argue it was partially (or maybe wholly) motivated by convenience that Gus presents but#it really was the first time Spectra has personally expressed his tie to Gus gah#all of this to say#they are sickos; each in their own way; and I think we can really make this more sinister and insane than we’ve allowed ourselves#throughout the years so far#like yeah. can I see them as a happy couple? sure! but also can I see this as a very codependent (more so from Gus’s angle) relationship#that’s being sprinkled with Tons of manipulation from Spectra? also yes#actually sorry for this wall of tags idk what got me thinking about them again#but it’s so so biting the bars day bc these guys are so fun!! we just have to let them be and maybe read canon through less good intentions#ok uhhh
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egginfroggin · 3 months ago
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I usually try not to get too negative on my blog, but I have to say that one thing that I'm worried about with AI art is the possible accusations that could be placed on people with certain artstyles (surrealism, hyperrealism, etc.) that are more prone to the "uncanny valley" effect, or even just artists who are in that midway point where most of a piece looks great but there's a few things that are anatomically questionable.
I think it's fine for people to have suspicions, but I'm worried that people will come to expect things such as progress videos or shots as a given, and that this will intimidate young or new artists, making them feel incredibly pressured to provide things that they shouldn't have to. And, speaking from experience, pressure does not do good things to the creative mind.
I'm worried that people will start seeing inconsistencies or awkward anatomy and immediately react with accusations of AI. It's happening on other platforms, and probably also on Tumblr, and as much as I dislike AI, I think that people need to learn to slow down and really look at something before making that accusation.
What good will stamping out AI with vigor do if innocent artists get caught in the crossfire and stop creating out of fear? What good will it do if the next generation of artists is too scared to share and inspire each other?
Genuinely, I would personally rather deal with AI images existing while still being able to freely share my actual works than I would deal with tiptoeing around very real people who would dismiss my hours of work (and musculoskeletal pain) as worthless and not real. Let artists still be free for goodness' sake.
I can be more thoroughly worded later if anyone asks, and this will probably be sorely misinterpreted, but I just need to get this out and I'm tired.
TLDR: It's fine to be against AI-generated images, but please check yourself and be careful who you accuse of using such technology before you get someone innocent caught up in it. AI-generated art isn't great, and neither is putting down someone's hard work as fake.
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waywardsalt · 1 year ago
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Hey, thanks for the response on the post where I asked about what people dislike ab totk! I genuinely appreciate it a lot, and you summarized most of my thoughts about this beautifully!
Here's something you might find interesting: something about this game's pacing REALLY bothered me from the start, and I think I know what it is. Totk, despite being an open world game that you can pour a ton of time into, feels short. It's a really weird feeling, and I think it can be explained in that Nintendo is trying to use the linear storytelling format for a nonlinear game, which is also why the ability to see the tears in a random order was disorienting, and why the stories from the ancient sages felt so repetitive.
The gameplay is long, but the story isn't! If you compare it to Skyward Sword, for example! In sksw, you go through each of the areas once, and then again with some changes, and then again with more. There's several clear acts, and even if the game is super super linear and recieves criticism for that, it works really well in that context. Additionally, the characters more than make up for the linearity of the story. Totk tries to take that same format, but doesn't seem to understand that this format is for a linear story. It only has a very brief story, and the story to gameplay ratio is so dragged out that unless you get invested in the world, it all starts to feel really stupid and pointless. Unfortunately, totk fails at getting us invested, too.
I really hope this made ANY sense at all, ty again for the input!! I love the responses I'm getting on that post djbdjsndns :D
Hi, you're welcome for my uh... totk rant, I guess? I covered a lot of stuff in it but I wouldn't say I covered everything bc there is... a lot abt that game that rubs me the wrong way in one way or another.
totk is definitely an odd case, it being an open world game that does try to adhere to linear game rules, you’re right- and i’d say the story is severely kneecapped by that attempt on the game’s part to have its cake and eat it too. it tries to mix what botw brought to the table with what was done in the past, but because botw is vastly different in what it does than past zelda games, the result is a messily paced, poorly-told, gameplay-focused with piss-easy mandatory puzzle segments result, failing to capture the advantages of linear games and instead making those specific parts considerably weaker.
people give linear games shit for… honestly, im not totally sure, as someone who really enjoys linear games. they allow for a good focus on story and character, mostly because you can have a set pace and passing of time and order of events. totk tries to implement linear style elements into a game where you can do anything out of order, so in the end the story is surprisingly brief but slow paced because you have to travel so far for everything and they have to account for you doing everything in any order, hence... repeating the same fucking information as a reward for four of the dungeons (which, i don't care how you feel about this game, is an awful fucking choice i mean holy SHIT), and is probably why the interactions with the new sages include very brief character arcs or something, they wanted to include some kind of linear character stories but it all just got stuffed in between a bunch of mini-main quests.
the fact that effectively half of the main story happens ages in the past and is communicated through brief cutscenes that can easily be encountered out of order, too, is kind of a pitiful way to tell the story. they're all basically glorified exposition dumps since nothing about them will change, they're all events that have already happened and have nothing to do with the player except hyping them up i guess.
the dungeons themselves are awkwardly transposed from a more linear game style with them relying on a specific skill to some degree, but they just fall so flat compared to past linear zelda dungeons. in botw the divine beasts honestly worked because the mechanic of manipulating the beasts themselves and the activating of switches fit perfectly with the setup of the dungeons being huge machines, while there isn't as good of a story example as to why totk's dungeons have the same switch mechanic. botw's divine beasts work pretty well in an open world setting. totk's just fall to pieces in an open with setting, even discounting how ascend could just snap them in half entirely. you just... can't have the same kind of dungeons as past zelda games in an open world format. once you take out the array of specific-use progressively-earned items, you're just left with this tiny little gmod ass toolbox to do what felt like baby's first loz-style dungeon. go to the clearly marked waypoint, do one (1) simple puzzle, get reward.
i miss mini bosses, rooms with puzzles that had to be solved to unlock a door or a doorkey, and even the experience of wandering around just trying to figure out what to do next. honestly, the first half of the lightning temple was the best part of all of the dungeons put together, and then we're back to 'go to four different rooms to do four different easy puzzles'. linear games have genuine advantages over open world games, and open world games have their own advantages. in the story segments, totk just ignores the advantages inherent to it's game's basic style in favor of trying and failing to emulate the advantages of a very different game style.
totk is so paradoxically unable to tear itself away from the series' past while at the same time disregarding series staples and even big parts of its own goddamn prequel.
in my experience with the game, as far as i can remember, i believe i went around and opened all of the towers, did some shrines and the depths, got the master sword, did the main quests with some side quests, then sped through getting all of the memories in order, then did the final boss. in between all of that, i managed to get all of the armor, do every single shrine, and open the entirety of the depths. i did not give a single damn about the story by the end. for me, with my playstyle, everything was just... spread out over such a long period of time so there was barely any urgency at all, i experienced the memories all in quick succession while already knowing the big twist (which. btw. i didnt care about. i wasnt really endeared to zelda and link's lack of visual interest during cutscenes just brought up the question of if he doesnt care why should i), and since this game's story is more linear, it just felt so disjointed and strange and... not important.
with botw it makes pretty good sense why link may take ages, why you could get the memories however you want, all of that. zelda is keeping things with ganon on pause for you. all of the big stuff happened in the past. you are here in the present, in the ruins of the past, a blank slate come to eventually complete the mission that you had failed, at the same time discovering this new world and becoming re-acquainted to it with this strange second chance you've been given. totk doesn't have this excuse. at least in past zelda games, you did things in a specific order, so when you wanted to fuck around, it was usually something related to or based on your progress. if you want to fuck around in oot what you can do is based on where you are in the game and even then it all ends up wrapping back around to bolstering link for the end. getting hearts, better items... like every side quest in every other loz game did. in totk you can do a sidequest for like. one flower. and what does that even do for you. it doesn't have the excuse of the honestly pretty well crafted setup and world state of botw.
i really don't know what happened during the development of totk, and i can't imagine it was the smoothest thing in the world, esp considering the pandemic hitting in the middle of it. but just... it just feels like it failed in so many regards and was just... so disappointing, and yet people are heralding it as the best zelda game and- this is not what i want a zelda game to be! i want a zelda game to have those wonderful puzzle-filled dungeons with well-written main characters and music that fits the setting and feels supported by the game's events and a unique setting with unique little nooks and crannies and good pacing and act structure and like. some kind of heart to it. not just another big open-world game created to be the big open world game where you can do this one amazing specific cool thing that TOTALLY is worth the $70 or whatever else it may be priced around the world.
idk. to me what makes zelda games zelda games is the linear storytelling and those complex dungeons and specific method of progression, and botw's new open-world emulation of the sense that loz 1 gave does not and probably will not ever be able to mix with that linear style unless you have massive in game game style shifts to allow for it. either return to the old format or just commit to the series becoming Triple A Open World Game Series Number 34
#asks#salty talks#bitching abt totk#wind-awoken#ty for the ask i love tearing into this game bc its at least helped me understand some stuff abt game design and what kinds of games i like#and why. too bad this game is rancid imo#dude i fucking love skyward sword. the linearity lends itself to a sense of progression and time passing and just. ugh. its so good#totk critical#totk neg#totk salt#covering my bases :)#i just. yeah gamedev is hard but if this is the mess we got after 6 YEARS what the fuck happened??? what was scrapped????#they had SIX FUCKING YEARS and having the ancient sages regurgitate the same info 4 times made it to the final release#what in the fuck happened in there#i dont really like the idea of there being a permanent move to open world bc its clearly just following the crowd on this one#its just such a massive departure from all other loz games (including loz 1 tbh) that that has to be part of it i feel. it makes sense#botw + totk dont feel unique like the other loz games do. they just. feel really similar to shit like elden ring and fenyx bc like.#thats just how open world action adventure games are ig. ironically theres not a ton of wiggle room with the open world formula#cant really get away from what makes them all feel interchangeable bc its so core to what an open world game is#best you can do is add some standout aspect like the general. Being A Souls Game in elden ring#totk adding dumbass glue doesnt even feel unique bc like. its just what every other sandbox game lets you do with some added jank#progression feels meaningless when it has no impact on what you can do in the game and thats the only kinda progression in totk#get more health make armor numbers bigger make better food fuse better weapons. you cant even upgrade the abilities this time#yeah botw has similar pitfalls but it at least owns being an open world game. it utilized and embraced the format#idk. totk before release was increasingly overwhelming to me and post release it was just such a massive letdown#i remember trying in earnest to pull a wagon using a horse and just. having the worst time. ultrahand sucks unless you make death machines#or one of like five specific traversal things
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midnightmystical · 8 months ago
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I really fucking hate that even when something super positive happens with/towards me with people my brain WILL eventually make to where I'm like "oh person only feels sympathetic they actually can't stand you" or "people WILL shit talk about you when you aren't around" or "people will fuck you over in life just because of my existence"(which has happened)
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imwritesometimes · 1 year ago
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they really have just completely and totally fucked the tagging/search system on this website good fuckin GOD
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astrxealis · 11 months ago
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fun story i got the dlc of 'a date with death' at school LMFAO ..... i have cash but not gcash (it's a filipino thing) so i was talking w my friend in class who also played the game (and she calls me a nerd /pos a lot lol) and i was like i want the dlc but i have no gcash... and she was like ok i'll give you gcash..... enabler ....... but also she wants me to tell her abt it so. ^_^ ecks dee
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hecckyeah · 1 year ago
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#just feeling very. emotional about a swimsuit#this is all about body image etc so if that’s not your cup of tea just scroll along <3#so#I bought a new swimsuit today and it’s in a larger size than I’ve ever needed bc ya girl is going through some weird stuff#that’s been making me gain weight again#after I lost a ton in 2020#but anyways#I haven’t needed a new swimsuit in a while so I went conservative/practical and got a one piece#and usually. trying on anything over a women’s XL and realizing it fits#would start me panicking. a lot#but I…..didn’t???#it’s not the best#it’s kind of cheap and the chesticle area is a bit saggy and it definitely highlights things i didn’t want it to#but my reaction to the mirror wasn’t anything negative#it was just like. oh. okay#that’s a swimsuit and it’s sturdy enough so I can go tubing with my friends and it has spaghetti straps so I can tan#because honestly. who cares???#I’ve been so perceptive of the way I process how other people look that it spilled over into how I view myself#because if a girl shows up at the beach with belly rolls my first thought is. NOTHING#I don’t think about it#I don’t think hurray I don’t think yuck I just. she exists#and so do i#and I want to be healthy for my own purposes so that I’m not winded by walking a couple miles#so that I can run and enjoy it#not to look skinny#and when I tell you this is REVOLUTIONARY for me#aka it’s only changed in the last 2-3 MONTHS#idk.#I just am happy finally and it’s not gonna be easy but I think I feel better than I ever have about my appearance#call it body neutrality if you will
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homiro · 4 months ago
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[First picture ID: A waterboarded screenshot of text that reads, Not to doom post on main but yeah my boyfriend and I bring in approximately two hundred and forty thousand united states dollars, live in an apartment that is extremely reasonably priced, with minimal living expenses, and still have to buy cereal on sale and all my clothes second hand. Things are hard even for the successful (with the word successful between inverted commas) young adults (ellipsis). End ID]
[Second picture ID: A screenshot of a sarcastic post from twenty thirteen made by user @/dril, wint on twitter that reads, in a list, Food is two hundred united states dollars, Data is one hundred and fifty united states dollars, Rent is eight hundred united states dollars, Candles are three thousand and six hundred united states dollars, Utility is one hundred and fifty united states dollars. Someone who is good at the economy please help me budget this. My family is dying. End ID]
observing the responses to serialunaliver's parental income poll and finding that a lot of tumblr users are struggling to reconcile with the fact that they are middle class and above
#described#that first post is just insane even if you take into account the costs of living in the US#how can you say you're struggling with that income lol that's a cushy life and honestly i don't believe the second hand clothes part#even i get new clothes and stuff sometimes and i have been wearing hand me downs and second hand stuff my whole life#my househould's gross income per year is around 20k euros#that would be 121 160 ish in reais#and that's because two members are disabled and get a pension#my mum works at a factory five days a week from 8am-5pm and makes 1k-ish a month#my brother and i can't find a job because there are no jobs#and in my case i'm overqualified and mentally disabled and they won't offer accommodations lel#and we get the end of the month with little more than 200 euros to make it to the 8th of the following month#which is when the money comes in#we don't pay rent because we came to live at my grandma's house so we just pay the annual fee since the house was made in the late 60s#but the cost of living is too high welp#groceries are expensive petrol is expensive as fuck the car is old (1995 old) and always breaking down#my mum and sperm donor had to declare bankruptcy because of schemes he was up to so now she can't have anything in her name#and i'm just honestly a lost cause i started a phd bc i didn't know what to do with life and now can't even pay for tuition#and not to mention that it's not just the utilities we also spend a ton of money with medication and appointments and shit so like yeah#we need to take into account the costs of living in places but in my case i really am broke and my family is and always has been poor#it's not dissonance believe me#im also the joker welp but lately i've just been feeling like im a lazy freeloader who should have been left to die#when i wasn't born breathing and then turned out to come all broken lel but it is what it is#negative#money things#homiro said some shit#long tags
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dog-girl-zezora · 2 years ago
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lovedrruunk · 2 months ago
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some rlly random Vi dating headcanons :3
A/N just finished this and realized almost all of these are negative traits LMAOO
Jinx version!
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Absolutely the type to constantly be eating your food and stealing off your plate. No 'please' no NOTHING... steals your meal like it's her god given right and won't even look at you. If you complain about it she'll give you the same excuses every time which are stupid reasons like "I'm literally helping you earn good deeds right now." or "I'm bulking up." and she'll be completely serious. "Fanum tax" no bitch Vi tax...
"Dark humor". What's funny to her isn't exactly funny to the general public so the shit she blurts out when she's trying to be funny 90% of the time is NOT... You two could be like about to jump from one roof to another and she'll casually go "What if you slip and fall and break both your legs" or the two of you go swimming and she's just like "What if there's parasites in this water" She'd be giggling to herself not realizing that you're literally about to tweak out.
Accidentally breaks stuff around the house. She’s so strong that she sometimes forgets her own strength. You’ll hear a loud crack, and when you rush over she’s standing next to something she’s just snapped in half looking guilty. "Uh, I swear it was already kinda broken." "Kinda?"
speaking of... DENY DENY DENY!!! Maybe Jinx was on to something because she's a SERIAL LIAR. Oh she snores like a ten ton truck? No she doesn't. She ate your last popsicle? Why would she do that? Her tongue's purple? You're seeing things. She makes a face when she lies? Nuh uh? She's making it right now? What are you talking about...
Turns every single thing into a bet (that she knows she'll win). Uses this as a trick to get you to do a chore she doesn't wanna do herself sometimes. Even when there's no prize or consequence she'll just randomly declare them for no reason. “Bet you can't go the whole day without kissing me.” She always regrets that one.
Loud as FUCK!!!!!!! Can't do ANYTHING quietly. Her waking up to grab a cup of water in the middle of the night sounds like a fucking slipknot concert and then she has the nerve to ask if she woke you up.
all for rn gn! :P
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cherie-doll · 5 months ago
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𓆩♡𓆪 Headcanon: Summer With Them
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ೄྀ࿐ ˊˎ- Ghost, Soap, Gaz, Alejandro, Phillip Graves, Keegan, König, Horangi, Nikto
ׂׂૢ Y’all have no idea how much i hate summer i defrost from vampire to weird nerd -1000 aura points or whatever they’re saying on the clock app
Anyways i finished this while at the laundromat
Ghost
Prefers summer nights to summer days or evenings
Sits on the porch at night with you listening to the cicadas sing
And during this time you can’t take showers together bc he won’t let you adjust the temperature, he takes his showers ice cold
Don’t ask me where I get this from but he vibes with that one Type O Negative song bc according to him it gives “summer” (iykyk)
Prob has sun sensitivity
Cannot leave the house without his sunglasses
And he avoids driving when the sun’s too bright
Soap
Bastard who enjoys summer #1
He likes summer because it means going down to the beach and showing off his muscles that stay clothed under uniform throughout the year
Wants to buy swimming trunks that’ll match your swimwear
He likes joining teens in volleyball and flying kites with kids
Loves going on walks on the beach at dawn and dusk
He once gave you a bad scare when making you think the dolphin fin in the water was a shark
Even if you’re at home he’ll drag you out of bed to join his morning walk and evening walks after dinner
Gaz
He’s content with summer
Will come up with tons of things to do
Picnics he prepares every weekend
Cloud watching
Catching fireflies in a jar and setting them free all at once to see them glow
Running his fingers through your hair as the breeze blows
Making lemonade together to stay cool outside
Buys a vintage camera to take lots of pics of you
On every evening walk you take together he picks something small like a leaf or flower and saves it
At the end of the season he gets everything together and creates a page in his scrapbook
Alejandro
Bastard who enjoys summer #2
He likes the feel of summer breeze on his bare skin and you look forward to seeing that ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
Likes to sleep with the windows open at night
Blasts music
Carne asadas
Frequents the local ice cream shops to buy mangonadas
Throughout the entire summer your kitchen has fruits of all kind that he eats with tajin
Will take you for a drive around in his truck and then find a quiet little spot like a lake or mountain to park and sit on the truck bed watching the sky
Phillip Graves
Sits outside with sunglasses on and beer in hand
Calls for you to come out and sit with him to watch the sunset
Cookouts
Anytime you complain of the heat you better hope he’s not around to yap your ear off about some anecdote from when he was a child
“It’s hot” “Ain’t that hot” he responds whilst his face is sunburned bc he refuses to wear sunscreen
Will only wear sunscreen if you are able to catch him before he goes outside and apply it for him
Keegan
It seems like summer evenings are the perfect time to do stuff
For some reason likes to do things shirtless in summer: yard/garden work, mowing the lawn, washing the car..
You set up a chair on the porch to watch him
Falling asleep on a soft patch of grass under the shade of a tree
Will start a bonfire and sit around it with you for hours into the late hours of the night
Sometimes you’ll stay out so late with him that both of you fall asleep
König
He’s not fond of summer
Would prefer to stay inside but if you want to he’ll go out as well
Sprawls on the floor with the fan on
He’ll drive where you want to go and then sit in the car watching you
Prob keeps ice packs in a cooler to keep cool when going outside for a long time
He’d rather be outside when the sun starts to set and the sky turns orange
Sets up a hammock
Afternoon naps on the hammock with the gentle sway of the wind
Horangi
He likes summer and prepares for it
Just imagine him getting out a little backpack with a sunhat, sunglasses, sunscreen, water bottle, umbrella, cooling sleeves, etc…
That’s not for him tho that’s for you he puts on sunglasses and is good to go
During summer he loves going to markets and buying fruit bc that’s when it’s best
Lots of strawberries, grapes and tangerines
Constantly reminds you to wear sun protection
He likes being outside a lot actually and will take you to his favorite parks and places to hike
Nikto
The change of seasons does not affect him much
He’ll notice the change of weather one day and mention how much warmer it is
“It’s summer” “Oh, we should go camping soon…”
He’ll take you camping whether you like it or not insisting that you will like it
Sets a tent near the river to catch fish
He also likes to plant vegetables during the nice weather and bring them to you, proudly showing off his hard work rewarded
He likes to cook meals together and eat outside
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AITA for not having time to read my mutual's writing?
Met a mutual on here, bonded through fanfic, have been tight with them for a few years with pretty much no bumps in the relationship, just overall had a really good time hanging around them when I could. We both write a lot and share our writing, and occasionally we talk about that writing/workshop it in passing.
In the past few years I've gone through a ton of life changes. Most notably I went from a multi-person household to a single-person one, and I've been living alone in a prohibitively costly city for a while now working 40 hour weeks and barely scraping by. As soon as the transition started I spent the last of my free income on a shitty little laptop so I could still write, putting down words on my bus/train commutes in the morning and quite literally writing on my breaks at work because I feel insane when I can't create. I bring this up to really stress that I don't have the time for the hobby, I force myself to make the time and even then it never feels like enough.
The only thing I can really stand to do with my 3 hours of free time at night is hang out with my moots online. I'm an extrovert so being around people recharges me. If I don't have designated social time I get super depressed and can pretty much feel my soul withering away. I also feel like I should probably mention that I kinda have a slew of mental issues, personality disorders and PTSD and AuDHD and the works. Point being, shit is rough my dude, but I am a person who likes to work hard and face challenges head on and even though we strugglin, we doing it with a positive outlook.
But! I am an incredibly solution-oriented person and I have found what I personally believe to be a good balance. No one should have to live like this, but I do, and I have found a way to be happy. My writing and my social time is all load-bearing. It is not something I just choose to do on a whim, it's all planned and scheduled and I adhere to those routines very strictly because, I cannot stress this enough, I will go fucking bonkers if I don't.
I'm mutuals with a lot of writers obv, and I sadly don't have time to read their work anymore, unless I get some extra time on my days off or something gets cancelled or like, I end up taking a vacation. I carry a great amount of guilt for this, though, even though I logically know it's reasonable. I try to support them where I can, cheer them on when I see them writing and tell them how cool their ideas sound, hype them up even when I can't actually read & review.
One of the things I do is sometimes I leave a kudos on fic I haven't read. I'm not trying to be ingenuine, and if they asked me I'd tell them like 'Oh I didn't read it yet, just wanted to show support!' but to me it's kinda like ripping a paper tab off a poster so that other's feel inclined to do the same. Plus my pals get a little email and a hit of serotonin.
Except one of my acquaintances, the one I mentioned at the start here, saw that I left kudos on a couple pieces another mutual of mine wrote this year. They more or less blew up my DMs with a ton of accusatory (like, literally presented like a 'GOTCHA!') stuff about how I was selective in who's fic I read, more or less implying that I secretly held some sort of grudge or negative feeling toward them and was making the conscious decision not to read or interact with their writing because of. Something, I don't actually know what they were trying to say. They also told me they vented to their friends about this MULTIPLE times, but they never once approached me to let me know they were feeling paranoid or neglected, they literally just took the most bad faith reading of it possible and then presented that to me like it was something I intentionally did, while the whole time I was unaware.
I tried to explain to them the kudos thing, that I didn't do it to every story, just ones I caught/noticed in my busy schedule. And I laid all this out and asked, multiple times, what free time am I supposed to read with? They didn't answer, and doubled down, kept trying to show me 'proof' that I was shorting them and no one else. Once they started to realize how wrong they were they backed down, but they didn't really apologize, or admit they were wrong, and they tried to end our relationship and left every single server we were in together. Because of some other unrelated stuff going on in my life, I didn't really consider them to be a close friend, but they were someone I really held dear and would've walked through hell for if they'd asked.
I still feel like there is something I'm missing here, and that's why I wanted to ask if I'm TA. I'm a pretty good communicator but one of the things I told myself when talking down my disordered thoughts (guilt about this prior) was "no one in their right mind would use reading fanfic as a metric for friendship." Now that I've had that exact thing happen, I'm starting to think maybe those thoughts weren't so disordered. Maybe this IS a big deal, and I should think about it more, but I don't even know what the solution to that would be. I just. Don't have time to read something lovingly crafted and appreciate it for what it is. All the hours in my week are used up, I'd have to lose sleep for this and with my mental health the way it is that is not an option.
Feel free to be a brutal, my skin is thick. Thanks!
What are these acronyms?
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hellenhighwater · 10 months ago
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Hi Hell, I wanted to get your thoughts on something. My friend who has been vegetarian for close to 30 years is thinking about becoming vegan. His main reason is that the pain and suffering of an animal in the large majority of the animal product industry is not worth the enjoyment he gets from cheese, milk, etc. He hypothesizes that most people are not vegan due to lack of education about the industry’s methods, and because eating meat is so normalized. I mostly agree, but something about what he’s saying makes me feel bad. Maybe because I don’t see myself ever becoming vegan, due to how much I love certain foods, but I like to think of myself as an empathetic and moral person. So I think I just feel quite selfish.
He is a very analytical and logical thinker, and says he wants to find more anti-vegan arguments before deciding for sure, but can’t seem to find many. What do you (and your followers) think? I was thinking you aren’t vegan, but I don’t actually know.
This is very much not my lane, but if you want my two cents then for me it comes down to a few things.
One: there is a basic mass of food that any human needs to consume in order to stay alive. That can be plants, it can be animals, it can be animal byproducts. For the a significant proportion of commercially produced food, there is a negative impact. It's hard to quantify; in some cases it is certainly direct, quality of life issues for animals. In other cases it's more broad environmental impact from commercial farming, or quality of life for the human laborers involved in harvesting etc. It's hard to come up with any objective measurement for harm when comparing individual animal suffering vs human quality of life vs large scale environmental issues. There's plenty of information out there on some of the vegan diet staples and how increases in farming things like quinoa have enormously detrimental effects on their native communities, if that's something your friend is not already aware.
Two: There is a degree of this that is just...unavoidable. Things eating other things is the way living creatures survive, and on a systematic level there's not a ton we individually can do to change things--and on a practical level, there's only so much you can afford to spend on food, and organic, cruelty free stuff is more expensive. There is a level of privilege in being able to choose to spend your money in that way that is not always an option for everyone.
I'm not vegan. I'm not vegetarian. I care deeply about animals, and I'm aware of what commercial husbandry looks like--it's pretty terrible. I still eat meat. I try to do so as ethically as I reasonably can.
I don't have an issue with eating other animals. It's a part of nature. To me, I see the obligation more to do our best to try to get meat (or byproducts) that have been raised as well as we can manage. Free range eggs are pretty easy to come by, if you live in the country. Same with locally made cheeses and butters, even farm fresh milk--some places have self-serve milking that allows cows to roam in pastures and then be milked at will. Price and availability will vary by where you are, but it's more and more common; as more and more people start to care about how the people and animals involved in making our food are treated, better options become more available.
It also should be noted that the animals involved in farming are almost universally completely domesticated. There's no alternative for these animals and their progeny except for life in human care. These breeds require human aid for their own health and safety, because we have been breeding them for (in many cases) thousands of years to rely on us and to develop traits that will not aid them in the wild. If everyone decided, tomorrow, to become vegan, then these animals would need to remain in human care for however many thousands of generations it would take to breed them back to the ability to survive without us, or we would have to sterilize them en mass and terminate these breeds through lack of reproduction. It is not an option to just release these farm animals into the wild. Domesticated animals require human care. Some of them, like pigeons, have gone feral when we abandoned them, but they are not like their wild cousins, and it shows.
Because of the selective breeding involved in domestion, most of these animals are producing byproducts--eggs, milk, honey, wool, etc--in quantities that they do not need. While some species have been bred to do that to their own detriment, most heritage breeds are fully capable of producing more than they need of these things, and there can be true symbiosis between these animals and their human caretakers. Some of these things they need to have removed for their own health. It's an ancient bargain--we keep them safe, and warm, and healthy, and protected, and they give us that which they have in abundance. The problem isn't the animal product, it's how it's produced commercially.
So yeah--veganism is one option, but it is, in my opinion, a narrow scope at an issue that is far more nuanced. I think it's equally ethical to aim for a diet that focuses on local, ethical farming practices--for growing crops, for caring for meat animals, for beekeeping, for chickens and sheep and whatever else we need. We've spent longer than any of us will live making these animals part of our world--discarding them and what they can give us is not going to benefit them. We just have to learn how to treat them respectfully.
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headcanonenthusiast · 11 months ago
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Valeria Garza NSFW headcanons. 
This was made with fem readers in mind.
Also quick note, I apologize in advance if this isn't as detailed as my headcanons on some other characters. It was definitely harder for me to come up w/ stuff for Val, especially bc girlie is nowhere near one of my favorites (I'm sorry 😔) but what better way to expand on writing then doing headcanons of characters you rarely think about? So, without further ado, I hope you enjoy! 
(I completely understand that this type of content is not everyone's cup of tea, and that's ok! But, please scroll and ignore if this type of content isn't your thing as opposed to leaving any sort of negative comments.)
NSFW under the cut.
-THE brat tamer.
-Absolutely will not take your shit if you disobey her in any way, shape or form. 
-"What did you just say to me? Do you have any idea who you're talking to?" 
-Gets this look of absolute disbelief on her face if you dare to act like a brat, then her eyes turn dark and she's suddenly dragging you to bed. 
-"I'm the woman who decides whether or not you get to cum every night, querida. And if you're gonna keep acting like a fucking brat, then it looks like you won't get to cum for the rest of the week." 
-Her favorite forms of punishment include anything to do with orgasms. Whether it be edging you, overstimulating you or even denying you the right to cum entirely, she loves making you squirm and beg to release. 
-Shakes her head and clicks her tongue, as if you begging to cum is the most ridiculous thing she's ever heard after you've misbehaved. 
-"Oh, so now you're sorry? Chica, a sorry isn't going to cut it. I warned you about acting like a little brat, but you didn't listen. You never fucking listen to me." 
-Proceeds to lecture you and switch between degrading you in English and Spanish as she either forces a strap down your throat or harshly plays with your clit. 
-"Perra estúpida. Never listening to me and then acting surprised when I don't let you cum." 
-Will also partake in bondage, cuffing up your wrists to the headboard before she runs a vibrator painfully slow over your pussy. 
-As rough as she is when it comes to sex, if you're genuinely feeling upset about something, her gaze will turn more sympathetic (which she refuses to show to anyone besides you.) 
-"What? What's wrong, amor?" 
-And you're welcome to tell her about all of your troubles while she gently eats you out. 
-Probably has multiple straps. Prefers buying the thickest one possible but she does have one that's much longer for when you really piss her off. 
-Is very willing to spoil you with new sex toys and lingerie. Anything to make her pretty girl happy. 
-Also, I feel like she'd switch between wanting to see you touch yourself and not letting you at all. 
-When she's not there with you, she probably encourages you to masterbate and send her tons of videos of you doing so.
-But, if she's actually there and catches you touching yourself, it won't be pretty. 
-"Oh, can I not satisfy you enough anymore? Is that it?" 
-Then she fingers you so well your legs are shaking as she rants. 
-"Look at you, cumming just from my fingers. What a slut."
-"And you really thought you could make yourself cum the same way I do? No, no, estás loca por pensar eso, querida." 
-She wants anything sexual to be completely dependent on either her or toys she picks out for you. 
-In other words, very dominant. 
-In other other words, if you ever asked or God forbid tried to make her submit, you're a dead woman. 
-"Thats it. You're getting too fucking bratty for your own good. Get over my Goddamn lap right now if you know what's good for you." 
-And when you are on her lap, she'll switch between spanking your ass and spanking your pussy. 
-Leaves hickeys on the most visible spots on purpose. 
-Smirks when you get all shy about it, gently brushing your hair away as she chuckles. 
-"Don't worry, amor. I won't make the marks too visible." 
-But then she does, so she buys you the prettiest necklace with her name engraved on it as an apology, and another reminder of who you belong you. 
-Some translations for the Spanish stuff, chica = girl, querida = darling, perra estúpida = stupid bitch, amor = love and "no, no, estás loca por pensar eso, querida" = no, no, you're crazy for thinking that, darling. 
(Also I apologize if anything in Spanish is incorrect, online translators can only get you so far 😕)
Look at me go, writing about a character I don't even like and am not even attracted to because I'm straighter than a wooden ruler 🙃
This was honestly fun to write though! Valeria takes up like 0% of my thinking space, so coming up w/ headcanons for her when I barely remember she exists nor am attracted to her at all was a bit more challenging. Hoping y'all enjoyed this! 
Rudy NSFW headcanons r coming up next, so be sure to lookout for those in the near future 🤭
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lacy-oh-lacy · 2 months ago
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can you do some headcanons/imagine of jennifer check dating an emo girl? srs you're the ONLY one who writes her the way i like 😭😭😭😭😭 (btw, love your writing, you're damn talented!!
Omg Anon, you are the sweetest 😭 Tysm. You should check out my Jennifer Check x reader tag though cause I've reblogged some stuff from other writers that you'll probably like too 💕
𝑩𝒆𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝑱𝒆𝒏𝒏𝒊𝒇𝒆𝒓 𝑪𝒉𝒆𝒄𝒌'𝒔 𝑬𝒎𝒐 𝑮𝒊𝒓𝒍𝒇𝒓𝒊𝒆𝒏𝒅 | 𝑯𝑪𝒔
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•To be perfectly honest, Jennifer has talked shit about emos before and she did make a few snap judgements about you when you met
•However, right from the start she found something about your look inexplicably attractive and it lead to a lot of flirting (and negging)
•and she sees this vulnerability in you that drives her wild, both as a demonic predator and as the woman deep down that just wants to be loved
•She's pretty quick to ask you out, not even sure if she wants something serious or just to get you out of her system, but she finds she does really enjoy getting to know you
•It's a total opposites attract situation, you have opposite appearances, opposite personalities, opposite scenes, but maybe that's exactly what Jennifer needs
•She doesn't give a shit what anyone else thinks about your relationship, and if anyone gives you a hard time she will shut them the hell up
•Because of her controlling nature you might expect her to try and change you (suggesting different outfits and whatnot), but she actually finds your aesthetic super cute
•She even buys you little accessories that match your style perfectly
•She really hopes you're the cliche mall emo, because she will gladly hang out with you there all the time
•Oh, and she'd love to go to some concerts with you, surprisingly she really likes your taste in music (Make her a mixtape!)
•She's always stealing your clothes, your styles may clash but she makes it work, her look just has more of an edge now and she's always sleeping in one of your old band t-shirts
•Jennifer doesn't usually like angsty people which emos have a reputation for being, she sucks at sensitivity and tends to prioritize a good time over people's feelings
•But if you're like that she'll try to tread more carefully, and she gives you a ton of pep talks, just meet her half way and have some fun with her too
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