#i love you mr joker
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theredcuyo · 4 months ago
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"Why would you do all of this for me even after all i did to you?!"
"Because i love you, the you that it's really behind all of it, the you that you fight not to show to the world but that i've seen before anyway"
Is such a raw line that i asure you, if it's present in a fic, not necessary letter by letter, but in sentiment, then that's a good fucking fic
Wheter platonic or romantic
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bl-bracket · 2 months ago
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Introducing the next BL Bracket: Greenest Flag in a BL!!!
It's time for another rematch round! By popular demand, we will be doing another greenest flag bracket!
Now's the time for all the green flags in BL, the characters who you not only trust, but know will treat their loved ones, and anyone else for that matter, super well!!!
Since this is a rematch bracket, like last time, our previous winner: Tinn from My School President, will not be eligible to compete in the main bracket!
For regular rules, please check the submission form or the pinned post!
Submit your green flags here!!!
Submissions close on the 20th of September @ 9 PM (GST)
@tournament-announcer
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serizautism · 1 month ago
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guys i hate to say it but i Am emotional invested in the muppet joker. this is fantastic i love seeing tumblr history in real time
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daincrediblegg · 10 days ago
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The film bro empire is in shambles and the world is healing <3
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starlooove · 3 months ago
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Hello! What about Duke Thomas made you like him so much??
I've been checking out his tag cause I saw some really cool fanart of him, so now I'm curious on what makes his character so appealing
AWHWHW sorry pls bare with me I’m scatterbrained but like. In a sentence I love that Duke is someone who presses forward despite everything! Like this is draft two bc my first answer was just listing character traits which wasn’t the question; but what I personally adore about him is that he just doesn’t stop moving.
It sounds weird but like. To me he gives refusal to die, refusal to settle, refusal to give up. When riddler took Gotham Duke was certain HE’D be the one to save them if he tried hard enough, when Bruce lost his memories Duke tried to get him back and then pushed forward with his own plans with the certainty that Batman would come back - whether through him or not, when his parents went missing he said fuck the system and went after them anyways and that’s just like. Off the top of my head. Like as corny as it sounds Duke lowkey embodies what I love about Batman - the whole indomitable human spirit or however you say that and it’s by far my favorite trait bc I don’t even think he’s aware of it? Like he actively plays at not caring about the Robin movement and just wanting to find his parents but like 3 hours later he’s texting them going ‘but like what are the details if I joined lol. Like hypothetically.” He actively fights Damian until he agrees with him, becomes a leader within the movement until Bruce is back whilst dodging gcpd, and Bruce literally had to dress up as karma for Duke to admit maybe it did fuck him up a little - all for him to still be like “I’m not good enough :(‘.
And I know that all seems like shit he just did but I promise his mindset during these things is so fascinating to me bc it’s like he simultaneously understands not many others would do this whilst also holding it as bare minimum/base standards. Like I make joke posts about him being a hardass but tbh he doesnt judge anyone half as hard as he judges himself - he understands bad circumstances, plans going left, differing povs - all until he makes a mistake; then he sucks and needs to be better. He’s also just hilarious like I didn’t read him in chrono order so the first thing I saw was him in a fight with some girls brother bc he heard Duke was flirting with her and idk an opening like that just cemented him as cool to me.
ALSO (from the tags!) I ADOREEEEEE HOW MUCH HE LOVES THE ADRENALINE/RUSH OF FIGHTING! Like Duke got in a lot of fights while his parent were missing and besides the obvious acting out bc he’s hurt he also just genuinely loves the rush of it - like not my interpretation he outright says it! And i need to do a reread for him bc I feel like it wasn’t mentioned a lot but if the og fight was the hook, the adrenaline line is what reeled me in and keeping it in mind while reading stories of him going off on his own for the good of Gotham adds another layer to it bc it’s not SOLEY necessity for him! Like things happened to line up where there was always a void that needed to be filled when he got involved in anything but it genuinely feels like duke wouldve been here no matter the circumstances. like even in civilian aus the way duke as a character is set up makes it so that it feels like - to me anyways- theres no world in which hes not doing or striving towards something! duke isnt the type to just be comfortable, bad wording, but hes just a very hungry character to me - if for an adventure or a solution. Its conveniently been both for most of his career but im very interested for what happens internally when those two clash - which. i personally think the nature of his powers and gnomon could bring that out beautifully!
#I’ve made way too many drafts of this#and they all end in think pieces and fave aus and how I think his character should proceed#which. not the question#so I streamed of consciousness’d it I can elaborate on anything if need be#I kinda picked one trait#like what is THEE thing that draws me to Duke#there’s more but like. again don’t over think shit Ty Kenny beats#THIS IS NOT PERSUASION TO LOVE HIM IF IT WERE ITD BE BETTER I SWEAR#uhm slightly related this got me thinking of mr Bloom Again that guy was crazy#and Gordon Batman mixed thoughts#anyways#uhm.#ALSO#LMG#WAIT I NEED TO PUT THIS IN THE POST#wait I refuse to word it#IGNORE EVERY TAG BUT THIS ONE#no I’m gonna put it in this is important and -turns towards camera- you need to hear this too#ok so I added it from the tags and it got just as rambly as I feared but whatever idc#obligatory fuck WFA#TY FOR THE ASK IVE BEEN THINNJNG ABOUT THIS ALL DAY#and this is all I have to show for it….#WHATEVER THIS IS MY TRUTH#in conclusion I think I hate stagnant characters and any writer worth their salt who knows Duke#again fuck WFA#would have to work HARD to make him so#like. it’d be blatantly ooc to have Duke chilling and the amount of trauma and turmoil that can cause is 💕💕💕#like joker tried to recreate the Wayne killings but I genuinely don’t think that did anything for Duke#like I think it just added fuel to his fire as opposed to how Bruce’s parents dying started the fire for Bruce in the first place#uhm that’s it tyyyy
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kaidanalenkosprmanager · 7 months ago
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THE BEST OF PRIORITY: THE CITADEL (PART 1)
Featuring: Cmdr. Sophie Shepard, Lt. James Vega, EDI, and Thane Krios With: Flight Lt. Jeff "Joker" Moreau, Councilor Rannadril Bibsos Tembin Lesti Bensin Valern, Cmdr. Armando-Owen Bailey, and Kai Leng Kalahira, this one's heart is pure, but beset by wickedness and contention. Guide this one to where the traveler never tires, the lover never leaves, the hungry never starve. Guide this one, Kalahira, and she will be a companion to you as she was to me. Mass Effect 3: Legendary Edition (2021)
#mira makes gifs ✨#sophie shepard#james vega#EDI#thane krios#jeff joker moreau#mass effect#mass effect 3#me3#mass effect legendary edition#dailygaming#priority citadel is one of my favorite priority missions in the game so it’s a fun one to gif!#i absolutely love how much thane content you get in the front end of the mission since thane is one of my favorites!#and bailey is one of my favorite npcs in the game so i adore that he gets a bit of a spotlight role in a bigger mission too!#but i will say that i do think priority citadel has some.. writing issues? to put it mildly?#i think my biggest problem is that i feel like everything with udina feels like it kinda just comes out of left field#like it feels like there’s VERY little build up for what happens with udina being a cerberus plant#the idea is interesting!! but i wish there was much more build up for it? it’s sort of just- there for me and it just comes at you so fast#like udina had always been sort of portrayed as a kind of shifty/power hungry character (don’t get me wrong)#but the cerberus plot line seemed VERY hastily thrown in and i wish there was a bit more subtle nodding to it throughout earlier missions#and i could write essays about how i wish kai leng was written better#but people who write much more eloquently than i do can put it in much better words than i can what problems there are with his writing#i think he had potential to be a super interesting character if he was introduced earlier and was much less stereotypical in form#also i’m sorry mr. leng but miranda wears the armor better (I SAID IT AND I WONT APOLOGIZE FOR IT)#the fight between kai leng and thane is *chef’s kiss* 👌 tho (i adore the cinematography of the shots as a video editing bitch)#ME3 has very nice fight choreography in some of the cutscenes (especially the ones with kai leng and the phantoms)#thane krios will always be my beloved and in canon he and soph develop a mutual respect over their hand to hand combat skills :)#also i forgot to say joker looking so absolutely done with everything in that first gif is me irl ✨
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mxalexwhat · 2 years ago
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My facial journey while listening to The Nightmare
😌😳😱😰🤐😰👀🫨😰😩😭😣🙃😭👀😖😒🥺🤡😏🥺👀😳😵‍💫🥺👀😠🤨😳😰😐🤨😳😭😢🥺😌👀🤡😏👀😏😐🙃😵‍💫🫨😐😵‍💫🫨😶🤨🥺😔😒😔😞🤔🥺😭🥺😭🥺😔🥺😳👀😒😠🥺😠🥺🤡😠🤨😟😵‍💫🤨👀🤨🥺😔😥😔😐😬😰😥🥺😒😠🤡😒🥺😔😠😒😏🤡😂🤨😰🥺🥹😭🤡😏😥😧😰😬😳😰😵🫨😬😨😳😰☹️🤨😥😍🥰😦😰🤯😰😬😳😟😬🤡😱
🫠
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inkykeiji · 2 years ago
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i will never ever ever ever ever EVER be over dabi’s laugh <3333333333333
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chillvibesandgoodenergy · 11 months ago
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Be the Harley Quinn to my Joker
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twstinginthewind · 1 year ago
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Sparky ruffles Punch's hair and slings an arm over his shoulders. "Happy birthday, Carder! Has it been great so far?" He hands him a wrapped package. Inside is a high-tech thermos that's decorated with the crest of the Queendom Thorns. There's a bag of chocolate-covered coffee beans stuffed in there, too. "Same kind I have. It keeps stuff hot all day long. Even if you'd rather have tea, like some kinda weirdo." He grins teasingly, then turns his attention to Joker.
"And happy birthday to you, Miss Carder." Joker gets a hug with both arms, and a lil squeeze. "I hope you've had a great one, too. Here ya go." Sparky hands her a package, and smirks. "Sorry it isn't too creative, but I know you tea-chuggin' Heartslabyul folks would appreciate the same thing." It's another fancy thermos, also with chocolate-covered coffee beans, but this one has a retro design that proclaims "Peace, Love, Polka".
Punch gives an amused snort as his hair gets rumpled, and he stoops down a bit to accommodate for the half-hug. "It's been full of surprises, not gonna lie! I think I can really get used to having two separate parties for the both of us, you know?"
"You just like having two cakes," Joker snickered.
"So do you. AND two different vibes for the events, too." Punch gave a smile his dormmate, cradling the gift in his hands as Sparky went in to hug his sister. The smile stiffened somewhat at the length of the embrace, and he cleared his throat. "Ahem."
Joker reluctantly loosed herself from Sparky's hug, pouting at her brother. "I was behaving... but anyway!" She beamed at their guest. "It really has been a wonderful day, and your being able to celebrate with us makes it even better."
Punch nodded. "And these are great. Guess I was easy to read on the spelldrive fave; I guess I've always liked the hometown guys by default, haha?"
Joker ran a finger across the print on hers, smiling gently. "These seal up really well... i could sneak some coffee in and out, minimal risk of getting sniffed out unless I'm clumsy with it..."
"... it works for all liquids, you know," Punch noted.
"Shhhh. I'm enjoying my daydream." Joker giggled. "Sparky, thank you!! I know the beans'll help with my late night studies when the good Earl isn't propping me up well enough."
"This really was thoughtful, thanks!"
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starryneitz · 10 days ago
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Hey everyone I'm about to unrepress a memory everyone has ok? Ok.
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1mlei · 30 days ago
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I absolutely love the idea that Danny kills the Joker (because creepy clowns eww) and Jason happens to walk in right as he's panicking all over the place. Danny is desperately trying to explain it was an accident, while Jason's over here simultaneously feeling the best he's ever felt since his revival and falling head over heels in love at the same time.
Very cute, very fun, wholesome murder, 10/10 will read every time.
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Danny: *shoving Joker's body behind dumpster in a panic*
Jason: "Is that a dead body?"
Danny, recognizing Red Hood as someone famous in the Realms for avenging murder victims: "Oh hi Mr. Hood, ma'am, sir.. See this isn't what it looks like, it was a total accident I swear on half my life!"
Jason: "Half your wha-"
Danny, still in shock: It's just he was being all creepy, and I've had bad experiences with clowns before, I and then this one had a gun so I pushed him a bit, didn't mean to kill the dude, honestly!"
Jason: *walks over to check body*
Danny: "Soo, total accident, and I don't feel like being arrested, so I'm gonna go.."
Jason, realizing that is indeed the Joker lying dead behind a dumpster: "Hang on, at least give me-"
Jason turning around and seeing his saviour has vanished: "Damn, didn't even get his number."
...
Jason: *giddily takes selfie with corpse*
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Jason: *patrolling in relative peace when he sees some random guy and the flipping Joker in an alley, said Joker has a gun pulled on the poor guy*
Jason: *about to swing in to save the day and take out the Joker*
Danny, faced with a clown pointing a gun at his head while ranting about all the creepy things he's gonna do: "Yea no that's not gonna fly"
Danny: *Goes full on eldritch abomination and eats the Joker's soul, leaving his body as a lifeless husk*
Jason, standing at the mouth of the alley in disbelief:
Danny, turning back into his human form: "Oh eww, so not worth it, that guy tasted terrible."
Jason: *frantically straightens his jacket, tries to fix his hair and realizes his helmet's in the way, then strikes a pose and tries to look natural*
Danny: *turns around and realizes he's not alone*("omg is that Red Hood?")
Jason, using all his rizz: "Hey there handsome, don't suppose you'd let me treat you to some dessert after a meal like that? There's a place down the street ;)"
Danny: "..What?"
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Alternatively, Danny and Jason were already dating but got into an argument.
Danny, walking down a street brooding thinking: "Man, I've got to figure out how to make it up to Jason, chocolates, flowers, maybe get him a book, hmmm.."
Joker: *creepy giggling as he yanks a random kid that looks like he could possibly be a Wayne into alley™*
Danny, eyes lighting up: "Ohh yes you'll be perfect, thanks dude :]"
Joker: "Wh-"
..20 minutes later..
Danny, walking into his and Jason's apartment: "Babe! I'm sorry about earlier, but I have something to make it up to you!"
Jason, peeking around the corner with a frown: "Well whatever it is it's not just gonna fix- is that the fucking Joker?"
Danny: "Yep! Don't worry he only looks dead cause I'm holding his soul hostage right now, I thought you should get to do the honours <3"
Jason:
Danny:
Jason:
Danny: "...I have chocolates and that book you wanted to read as well..?"
Jason: "Marry me"
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Mmmhhh yes I love this trope so much!!
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haveihitanerve · 2 months ago
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Dad How Do I but with Bruce Wayne.
Bruce who teaches life advice- showing kids how to tie a tie, how to tie their shoes, braid their hair, teaching young adults to do taxes, to surf, the best lawyers to hire when in trouble, how to avoid scams, he educates the less fortunate on the best places to get free food, where to go in Wayne Enterprises for a hot shower and some toiletries, how to eat at formal functions so the higher elite have one less thing to criticize them on. He teaches people how to do card tricks and make your niece laugh by pulling out a quarter from behind her ear, teaches moms how to rock their baby to sleep properly, teaches teens to do front flips and cartwheels and calculus, educates them on how to write job applications and two weeks notice letters. He teaches people to sew, to cook(alfred helps) to assemble an IKEA shelf, how to work a lawn mower, and all sorts of different things. And when his son dies… Bruce uses his account to share his grief, his story, shares everything about Jason, what a delight he was, how awesome he was, how much he loved to read and school… and then one day, he gets Batman to join a video. And the hero is stiff and everyone can see the exhaustion, the anger and sadness in his joints, his movements, radiating off him. But he sits down heavily into the chair Bruce Wayne had previously vacated… and begins to speak. He tells the story of Robin, his young child sidekick, who just like Jason Wayne, was murdered by the Joker. He tells everyone how his little boy tried to save Jason Todd, and how they both perished in the aftermath. He tells people about his grief, his anger, and why Batman is suddenly harsher and hurts more. “Because I hurt more.” he confesses quietly, and the people finally get to meet the man behind the mask (figuratively) and truly get to see who their hero really is. The account’s popularity skyrockets, and soon Batman is a lot more common to be seen, teaching people how to defend themselves and handle the Batarangs he knows they collect after he fights. Nightwing shows up too sometimes, teaching more elegant flips and tricks and they demonstrate their workout together, and a few months later, Batman shyly introduces his new Robin, same messy black hair as the one before, but slightly smaller, and theres something… more behind those lenses in his mask. But the kid is soon a fan favorite, making sarcastic comments and countering Nightwings witty remarks, and the people get to see a new side of Batman, get to watch as he rolls his eyes at them, as he uses them to teach people how to disguise themselves, ways to use clothes to stem blood, tie tourniquets. 
Then Red Hood returns. And a kid in Crime Alley catches him cursing at his jacket because a button fell off and he cant get it back on. “Um! Mr. Red Hood sir?” the kid pipes anxiously. Red Hood turns to him, angry, but the kid doesn't back down and just goes “You should watch ‘Mr. Wayne How Do I: Sewing’ it'll help.” and then he scampers off. And Jason is pissed and even more angry because of course while he was dead Bruce decides to become a father to everyone in Gotham. But he watches the video. And it helps. And… well, its one of the older videos. And Jason finds another old video. The one about… the one about his death. It shouldn't make his anger lessen, shouldn't make him cry, shouldn't bring him to Bruce’s doorstep where he reveals himself and they hug and cry and catch up and cry some more… but it does. 
Gothamites are a little surprised when their local Crime Lord appears on the channel, standing right next to Batman. Surprised, but pleased. Because Batman looks happy in a way he hasn't in a long time and well… Red Hood watched out for them too. And now their two protectors are working together.
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voyter · 7 days ago
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CRIMINAL ! ... halloween special
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pairing jeon jungkook x fem!reader
your boyfriend ends up loving your costume idea for the two of you more than he initially lets on.
word count 5.4k words warnings jk and oc have matching costumes. vmin being the kings of halloween parties. slight crack. smut. roleplay dynamics. light bondage (handcuffs). oral (fem!receiving). handjob. unprotected sex (be safe girlies). switch!jungkook. switch!reader.
★ happy (late) halloween !!! this was originally supposed to be posted on the 30th but it wasnt finished .. so i was going to post it on actual halloween day but i got busy LMFAO IM A MESS !!! initially i wanted to do a kinktober but my ass couldnt even keep up with this so AINT NO WAYYY LMFAO IDK HOW YALL DO IT. BUT DONT FEAR ITS HERE NOW !! i had sm fun writing this, hope you love it as much as i do !! keep your comments positive or say nothing at all xx
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For the past three years, Jimin and Taehyung have hosted their annual Halloween party. It's the one event they take seriously, spending hours planning the perfect invite list, décor, and food. Friends and acquaintances eagerly anticipate the night, knowing it'll be full of unforgettable moments, laughter, and chaos. Jimin and Taehyung always go all out, making their Halloween gathering the event of the season.
You and Jungkook have a tradition of matching costumes. The first year, you went as Harley Quinn, and Jungkook went as the Joker. That one's still one of your favorites — especially with Jungkook's green hair and tatted up face. He looked so good that night. The second year, you went for something bloodier: you, a sexy victim, and Jungkook as Ghostface. It was thrilling, especially when he made the night even better by fucking you with the mask still on. By the third year, you went classic as Mr. and Mrs. Smith, and Jungkook couldn't take his eyes off your tits spilling out of your corset. This year, you decided to skip the fictional characters and go with something a little simpler — but still hot. You were dressed as a cop, or rather, a slutty cop, and Jungkook was the prisoner.
"Don't you think this is a little basic?"
“Do you know how many people I’ve seen at these parties dressed as vampires and cats?” you retort, adjusting your costume and checking yourself out in the mirror. “Trust me, baby, no one cares.”
Jungkook, clad in an orange jumpsuit, glares at you through the mirror. "I just hate orange," he says monotonously.
You turn around and face him, giving him a smirk. "You'll survive. Besides, you make anything look good."
He smirks, leaning down to capture your lips in a heated kiss. Your arms snake around his neck, fingers threading through the hair at his nape. His hands roam from your waist to your ass, squeezing the soft flesh in his large palms, pulling you closer. But just as things start to heat up, you push him back with a playful grin.
"Not now," you say, breathlessly. "We have to be there in a few."
Jungkook huffs in frustration, but doesn't argue. And even though he's not thrilled about his costume, the way his gaze darkens tells you he's already imagining what's to come later tonight. He knows he'll get you out of that outfit later. 
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When you and Jungkook walk into the party, it’s all familiar faces. Laughter and cheers erupt the moment they spot you two, with Jungkook’s arms handcuffed behind his back, the bright orange of his jumpsuit standing out in the crowd. You guide him confidently by gripping his arm, playing the role of the stern cop escorting her prisoner.
Jungkook looks equal parts annoyed and amused, his usual cocky attitude momentarily restrained by the handcuffs, though the way his lips twitch hints at his playful frustration. The room seems to buzz with energy as people start teasing him the moment you step through the door.
“No fucking way you agreed to this!” Jimin exclaims, eyes wide in disbelief as he takes in the sight of Jungkook in handcuffs. Without missing a beat, he grabs the camera hanging around his neck, the polaroid already set and ready to capture every costume of the night. “Oh, I have to take a picture of this. Tae, hold my drink!”
Without waiting for a response, Jimin thrusts his red solo cup into Taehyung’s chest, some of the liquid sloshing out and soaking into Taehyung’s blazer. Tae rolls his eyes but doesn’t complain, knowing this is typical Jimin behavior.
Jimin hurriedly pushes his sunglasses up into his hair and pulls out the polaroid camera, eyes gleaming with excitement as he positions himself in front of you. You smirk, grabbing your belt, keeping your expression serious like a true cop on duty. Jungkook plays along, tilting his head to the side with a playful pout, his lips pursed like he’s posing for a dramatic mugshot.
With a click, the camera flashes, capturing the moment perfectly. A second later, the familiar buzz of the camera sounds as the polaroid slowly rises from the slot at the top. Jimin pulls the photo out, shaking it lightly as the image begins to develop.
“Had no choice,” Jungkook grumbles. “Whatever girlfriend wants, girlfriend gets.”
Taehyung laughs, shaking his head. “Bro, you’re so fucking whipped,” he teases.
“Fuck off,” Jungkook mutters, though he can’t hide the small smile tugging at his lips. “What are you two supposed to be, anyway?”
Jimin looks genuinely offended at the question, pulling his sunglasses back down over his eyes as if that alone should make it obvious. “Hello? Men in Black!”
He points his plastic gun at Jungkook. Beside him, Taehyung pulls out a shiny MIB card.
“Aw, I was really hoping you two would take my advice and go as Dumb and Dumber,” you pout, crossing your arms dramatically.
Jimin and Taehyung exchange offended looks, grimacing at your suggestion.
Jimin puts his plastic gun back in its holster with a flourish, shaking his head. “Respectfully, fuck you,” he replies, a teasing glint in his eyes.
You playfully lift a hand as if to strike him, your expression mock serious. Just then, more people start to stream into the home, their laughter and chatter filling the air.
“Well, since we are so extremely popular, we’ll meet back up with you guys soon.” Jimin says, turning to Taehyung, “We’ve got more people to greet.”
“Don’t get freaky in any of the bedrooms! I swear on my life I will kill you both,” Taehyung exclaims, shooting a warning glance over his shoulder as he follows Jimin into the crowd.
You roll your eyes, amusement dancing in your gaze.
"Alright, baby, can you take the handcuffs off now, please?" Jungkook whines, eyebrows knitting in genuine discomfort. "My arms are starting to hurt in this position."
"Keep begging like that, maybe I will," you tease, enjoying the playful power dynamic between you two.
Jungkook smirks, leaning in closer to amp up the charm. "Oh, please, officer? I promise I'll be such a good boy,"
You scrunch your nose in exaggerated disapproval. "Never do that again," you reply, trying to sound serious but unable to suppress the smile tugging at your lips.
He chuckles, the sound warm and inviting, as you turn him around, your fingers brushing against his wrists. The thrill of the moment sends a rush through you as you unlock the cuffs with the small key, the metal clinking softly as you release him.
He turns around, his hands sneaking around your waist and pulling you closer, the warmth of his body igniting a spark of electricity between you. You smile up at him, feeling a thrill at the proximity.
“Shouldn’t have done that,” he says, his voice low and playful. “Now who knows what kind of crimes I’m gonna commit again?” He looks down at you, a mischievous smirk playing on his lips, his eyes glinting with mischief.
“Careful, prisoner,” you warn, narrowing your eyes playfully. “Don’t forget, I’m watching you tonight.”
He holds his hands up in mock defense, a grin spreading across his face. “I promise to behave… for now,” he replies, the challenge in his tone clear as he leans in just a little closer.
You can feel the heat radiating off him, and despite your attempt to keep things light, the air feels charged with unspoken tension. “You’d better,” you say, trying to maintain an authoritative tone but failing as a smile breaks through. “I don’t take kindly to rule breakers.”
“Oh, I know,” he replies, lowering his voice in a conspiratorial tone. “But I can’t help it if I’m naturally inclined to break the rules when I’m around you.” With that, he leans in, brushing his lips against your ear as he whispers, “What if I promised to make it worth your while?”
A shiver runs down your spine at his words, and you step back slightly to meet his gaze, your heart racing. “You’re incorrigible,” you say, shaking your head, but your smile betrays your amusement.
“Only for you,” he quips, and the way he looks at you… you just know this Halloween night was going to be wild.
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You stood corrected.
A few drinks into Jungkook's system, and any pretense of annoyance about the costume was long gone. His hands seemed to find your waist every chance they got, fingers tracing the curves of your hips with a needy grip. His lips, once teasing, were now constantly seeking yours, trailing kisses from your neck to your lips whenever you were within arm's reach.
Even in a crowded room, Jungkook's attention was locked on you, his dark gaze following your every movement. And each time you caught him staring, he'd flash you a cheeky grin before pulling you into another heated kiss, making it clear just how much he was enjoying your costume — and the power it had over him.
Getting a drunk Jungkook home was a damn task. The moment you got him in the car, he was all over you. As you navigated through the quiet streets, his fingers slid up your thigh, kneading it with a firm grip that sent sparks of heat racing through you. Each touch made focusing on the road harder, especially when he leaned over the console, his lips grazing your neck in a series of lazy, warm kisses.
"Jungkook, you need to calm down," you warned, trying to keep your focus on the road as his kisses sent shivers down your spine.
He huffed, not wanting to stop but eventually relented, throwing himself back into his seat dramatically. He crossed his arms like a child who'd been denied his favorite toy, his lips forming a deep pout.
You glanced over at him, biting back a smile as he sulked in his seat. "Aw, I’m sorry baby. Almost home, then you can do whatever you want," you teased, knowing full well that his patience would snap the second you both stepped through the front door.
Like a bunny, his ears seemed to perk up at your words, his pout disappearing instantly. He sat back in his seat with a huge grin plastered on his face, the sudden shift in his mood almost comical. It was as if he'd forgotten all about sulking, now fully focused on the promise you'd made.
Surprisingly, Jungkook behaved as you both got out of the car and made your way to your apartment floor. He walked beside you quietly, though the anticipation was clear in the way he kept glancing at you, his grin never fully fading. His restraint was impressive, given how wild he'd been earlier, but you could feel the tension radiating off him, like a predator waiting for the perfect moment.
The second you unlocked the door, though, all that restraint snapped. Jungkook practically pounced, pushing the door closed behind you as he pressed you against it, his lips finding yours in a hungry kiss. His hands were everywhere at once — grabbing your waist, pulling you closer, one hand sliding up your back while the other dipped dangerously low.
Your sloppy kisses didn't break for a second as you stumbled through the apartment, laughter and heated breaths filling the air until you reached the bedroom. The second you got to the edge of the bed, Jungkook gave you a playful shove, making you fall back onto the mattress with a grin tugging at his lips. His eyes never left yours as he hovered above you, reconnecting your lips in a feverish kiss, his hunger for you palpable.
His mouth began its slow descent, trailing kisses down the curve of your neck, leaving a warm, tingling path in its wake. When he reached your cleavage, he paused, his lips lingering there as his fingers found the zipper of your bodysuit. With a swift motion, he unzipped it, freeing your breasts from the fabric. His eyes darkened with desire as he took in the sight of you, a low groan escaping his throat.
Without hesitation, he leaned down, capturing one of your nipples in his mouth, swirling his tongue around it in slow, deliberate circles. The sensation sent a shudder through your body, a sharp gasp leaving your lips as your back arched in response. Your hand instinctively found its way into his hair, gripping the soft strands, guiding him as he lavished attention on you.
Jungkook's mouth left your bud with a soft pop, his lips slightly swollen as he looked at you with a mix of desire and admiration. Without wasting a second, he pushed the rest of the bodysuit down your frame, his hands quick and eager as he stripped you of the remaining fabric.
“You seduce all the officers like this?” you tease, your voice light but laced with a hint of challenge as you looked down at him at the foot of the bed.
Jungkook paused for a second, momentarily confused by the question. But then it clicked, and when he realized you were still playing into the roleplay from earlier, his expression shifted. His lips curled into a mischievous smirk, eyes narrowing slightly as he fully embraced the dynamic again.
“Only the ones I can’t resist,” Jungkook murmured, his voice dripping with playful seduction.
His teasing words sent a shiver down your spine, the tension between you both thickening with every passing second. His hands moved with skilled precision as he unzipped your boots, tugging them off one by one. The boots were discarded carelessly, the clatter of them hitting the floor barely registering as Jungkook’s focus remained fixed on you, eyes dark and full of hunger.
With a firm grip, Jungkook tugged at the bodysuit, sliding it off your frame in one fluid motion, the fabric slipping away as easily as the last remnants of his restraint. He didn’t stop there — your fishnets followed quickly, leaving you in nothing but your panties. His gaze devoured you, his eyes darkening with each lingering second on your bare skin. He bit into his bottom lip, his excitement almost palpable as his eyes traced every curve of your body like he was committing each inch to memory.
Grabbing your ankle, he lifted your leg gently, a smirk playing on his lips as he began a slow, deliberate trail of kisses from your ankle up toward your inner thigh. Each kiss sent a jolt of heat through your body, his touch maddeningly slow, teasing you with every lingering press of his lips.
“If you’ll let me,” he murmured against your skin, his voice husky and full of promise, before kissing your thigh once more. “I did promise to make it worth your while.”
“Show me what you got, criminal,” you smirk, your voice laced with challenge and desire.
Jungkook’s smirk matched yours, his eyes darkening with intent as he hooked his fingers into the waistband of your panties. In one swift, fluid motion, he pulled them down, the fabric sliding easily over your legs. The second they left your skin, his gaze fixed on the damp spot left behind, a low moan escaping his lips as his hunger for you deepened.
“Look at that,” he murmured, his voice thick with desire. His fingers traced the wetness left on the cloth before lifting his eyes to meet yours, his smirk widening. “Already so wet for me, officer.”
The playful teasing from earlier had melted away completely, replaced with raw, undeniable need. Without hesitation, Jungkook lowered himself between your legs, his breath hot against your inner thighs. His lips hovered just above your core, his eyes flicking up to meet yours one last time before he leaned in, determined to show you exactly what he had in store. His tongue made the first slow, deliberate pass over your slick folds, sending a jolt of pleasure straight through your body.
Your body reacted instinctively to the sensation, arching your back slightly as a soft moan escaped your lips. You melted into the bed, fingers gripping the sheets tightly as waves of pleasure rippled through you, the intensity of it all leaving you breathless. 
It was when he latched his mouth onto your clit, the cool metal of his lip piercing sending shockwaves through your body, that you felt a fresh wave of ecstasy wash over you. Your body shook involuntarily, a reaction to the exquisite pleasure he was delivering.
“So good, baby,” you moaned, your voice breathy and filled with longing as you looked down at the man between your legs. Jungkook’s eyes flickered up to meet yours, dark and smoldering, the corner of his mouth twitching into a playful smirk as he enjoyed your reaction to his ministrations. 
"Yeah?" he mumbled, his lips brushing against your slick heat, sending a shiver up your spine. "Am I a good criminal, officer?"
Though it had started as playful banter back at Jimin and Taehyung’s house, the way Jungkook was slipping into this submissive role now felt different — kind of sexy. The intensity in his voice, the way he was looking up at you, it was doing things to you that you hadn’t quite expected.
You bit your lip, nodding as you reached down, finding his hand and intertwining your fingers with his. "Mhm, so good for me," you whispered, the words coming out more breathless than you intended. The shift in the dynamic added a new layer to the tension between you both, and you couldn’t deny how much you liked it.
He hummed in satisfaction against your skin, his tongue working skillfully, each stroke more deliberate than the last, as if determined to draw every last sound of pleasure from your lips. You could feel the tension building within you, and with every flick and suck, he pushed you further into a state of bliss. The warmth of his mouth, combined with the gentle squeeze of his hand in yours, only heightened the sensations coursing through your body. You could feel yourself unraveling, bit by bit, under his expert touch.
You lift your other hand, your fingers tangling in his soft, raven hair, pushing it back to reveal his forehead. The sight of his knitted eyebrows makes your stomach flip — he always does that when he’s savoring something, and right now, that something is you. Your grip tightens in his hair, pulling him closer, pushing his face deeper into you. His nose brushes against your clit with each motion, and you can't help but buck your hips slightly, your body moving instinctively as you practically ride his face.
Your moans become louder, filling the room with the raw sound of pleasure, almost pornographic in intensity. The way his mouth moves against you, his tongue expertly flicking and teasing, drives you wild. You feel his moans vibrate against your sopping pussy, sending shockwaves through your entire body. The more you push him into you, the more he responds, his hands gripping your thighs as he devours you, thoroughly enjoying every second of it. You’re lost in the heat of the moment, each wave of pleasure building to something inevitable, your body teetering on the edge of bliss.
With one final buck of your hips, his nose pressing firmly against your clit, the pleasure overwhelms you. Your release crashes over you like a tidal wave, your body trembling as you cum against his face. A loud, raw moan tears from your throat, your back arching off the bed as the intensity of your orgasm takes over. Your thighs instinctively begin to close around Jungkook’s head, but he doesn’t mind in the slightest — if anything, it only drives him further.
He stays right there, nestled between your legs, his tongue continuing to lap up every drop of your release. If he had it his way, he'd happily stay there forever. His hand gently caresses your thighs, soothing you through the aftershocks as your body relaxes, your breathing still ragged as you come down from the high.
Jungkook removes his hand from yours gently, rising up from the floor. Fully clothed, he crawls up the bed, hovering above you with a smirk that sends a thrill down your spine. His mouth glistens with a mix of his saliva and your slick, a tantalizing reminder of what just transpired. 
Without warning, he leans down, capturing your lips in a heated kiss. The taste of yourself lingers on his tongue, and you can’t help but moan into his mouth, the intimacy of the moment amplifying the heat between you. You feel him grinding his hips into your heat, seeking relief for the ache in his cock, and it drives you wild. The friction ignites another wave of desire, your body responding eagerly to his every movement.
He leans back down, reconnecting your lips, unable to get enough of you. The urgency in his movements tells you he's craving more, needing the connection as much as you do. Without breaking the kiss, you smoothly shift positions, pushing him back onto the bed. His body sinks into the mattress, and now it's your turn to be on top, looking down at him with a teasing smile. You sit up, fingers working the buttons of his jumpsuit as he watches you, his eyes dark with desire.
"Do good prisoners get anything in return?" he asks, his voice low, teasing.
"Yeah," you say with a smirk. "Freedom."
Your giggle fills the room as Jungkook kisses his teeth in mock annoyance, rolling his eyes at your cheeky response. Still, a smile tugs at the corners of his lips, showing he's just as amused as you are.
"I'm sure there's other officers that'll give you something," you tease, your fingers still working on the jumpsuit.
"What if I want someone in particular?" he responds, his tone more serious, the heat in his gaze intensifying.
"I'm sure that can be arranged," you murmur.
With a smirk, Jungkook sits up swiftly, his hands making quick work of pulling the jumpsuit off his frame. The fabric falls away, revealing his toned, broad chest — the very sight that always makes your breath hitch. You can't help but admire him for a moment, your eyes roaming over every inch of him, from his sculpted chest to the way his abs tense under your gaze.
He catches the look in your eyes, his grin widening as he notices how you're practically staring. "Like what you see, officer?" he teases.
Ugh, slut.
"You know I do," you reply, your fingers tracing over the tattoos decorating his skin before you press your lips against his again, losing yourself in the kiss as your bodies draw closer.
Your kisses travel south, lips brushing over the warm skin of his neck, chest, and abs, leaving a trail of heat in their wake. When you kneel between his legs, you can't help but notice how hard he is. A wet spot glistens where he’d been grinding against you earlier, evidence of the friction that’s left you both desperate for more.
"Baby, hurry up," Jungkook whines, his voice thick with impatience, the need evident in his tone.
You raise an eyebrow, biting back a smirk. "Refer to me correctly," you command, wanting to tease him just a little longer.
He chuckles softly. "Officer, please hurry up," he says, playing along, his words dripping with need.
“Good boy,” you coo with a smile.
Your fingers hook under the waistband of his jumpsuit and boxers simultaneously, yanking them down in one swift motion. His cock springs free, hard and eager, the pink tip glistening with precum. It’s begging to be touched, twitching slightly under your gaze as you admire him, and you can feel the heat radiating off him.
You let your hand glide slowly up his thigh, teasing him with featherlight touches, savoring the way his muscles tense under your fingers. Jungkook's head falls back against the mattress, a low, desperate moan slipping from his lips as he exhales, his chest rising and falling with the anticipation building between you.
You giggle softly, enjoying how easily you’re driving him wild. Finally, you wrap your hand around his thick, hard cock, your fingers squeezing his length gently but firmly. His reaction is immediate — his hips buck slightly as he lets out a deep, shaky moan.
"Oh, fuck yeah," he groans, his voice low and husky, the sound making you smile even wider.
You start to stroke him slowly, enjoying the feeling of him pulsing in your hand. His hands grip the sheets, knuckles turning white, and his eyes squeeze shut in bliss. The way he reacts to every little movement you make has you feeling powerful, completely in control.
"My pussy turn you on this much?" you tease, your voice dripping with playfulness, a smirk tugging at your lips as you continue to stroke him slowly, deliberately.
Jungkook's moan deepens, his hips bucking slightly into your hand, completely at your mercy.
"Always," he groans, his voice breathless. "Can never get enough of it."
Such a sweet boy. You reward him by quickening your strokes, picking up the pace and driving him wild. His response is immediate — his body tenses, and a low, guttural moan escapes his lips.
Jungkook's hand darts to yours, gripping the one resting on his thigh, his fingers intertwining with yours tightly. His touch is needy, desperate, as if holding on to you will keep him grounded while the pleasure you’re giving him threatens to overwhelm him.
His breath becomes ragged as you continue working him expertly. He bites his lip, trying to hold himself together under your touch. You can tell he’s getting closer, every stroke pushing him toward the edge.
“W- wanna cum in your pussy, please,” Jungkook whines, his voice trembling with need.
You smirk, teasing him further. “Do you?”
He hums in response, the sound more like a moan, his desperation palpable.
“Okay,” you say, your voice soft but commanding. “Since you’ve been so good for me.”
You pull away from his cock, climbing on top of him, the hunger in his eyes unmistakable. Leaning down, you capture his lips with yours, and he responds eagerly, his hands sliding down the arch of your back, gripping your ass tightly, kneading it in his large palms.
Then, without warning, a sudden surge of dominance overtakes him. In one swift move, Jungkook flips you both over, hovering above you with a glint in his eye. He gives you a teasing peck on the lips, but before you can react, he flips you onto your stomach, effortlessly manhandling you as though you weigh nothing.
With your back turned to him, the sound of rustling heightens your anticipation. You can’t see what Jungkook is doing, but the moment you feel his grip on your arm, your heart races. The cold, familiar touch of metal against your wrist makes it clear — he's handcuffing you.
A soft gasp escapes your lips as he tightens the cuffs around your other wrist, pulling your arms behind your back. You’re completely at his mercy now, and the vulnerability only fuels the fire between your legs.
“Am I still a good boy?” he teases, his voice dripping with playful mischief.
“Bad boy,” you manage to reply, though the excitement surging through you betrays your words. The restriction, the control — it all makes your pussy throb with need.
The sound of the slap reverberates through the room, sending a sharp sting of pleasure coursing through your body. You jolt forward, moaning in response, your skin tingling from the impact. Jungkook grabs the chain of the handcuffs, pulling on it slightly, adding a thrilling sense of restraint to the moment. 
His other hand grabs his cock, and you feel the deliberate tease as he slaps it against your pussy, spreading your slickness over his length. It’s torturous — how long he’s making you wait. But finally, after what feels like an eternity, he slowly pushes himself inside you. 
You gasp, your walls stretching to accommodate him, while Jungkook releases a low, guttural groan, his breath catching at the sensation of being enveloped by your heat. He pauses for a moment, savoring the feeling, his fingers still gripping the handcuffs. The tension in the air is palpable, each movement sending shivers down your spine as he begins to move, his hips rocking into you with slow, deliberate thrusts.
Your breath comes out in heavy gasps, your face buried in the mattress as his pace quickens, his hips slamming into you with a steady rhythm. The sensation of being filled so completely has you whimpering, your body melting into the bed as you push back against him, craving more with every stroke. Each thrust is more intense than the last, the bed creaking beneath you as the slick sound of his cock sliding in and out of your wet pussy echoes through the room.
Jungkook’s grip tightens on the handcuff chain, yanking you back harder onto his cock. “All your other prisoners fuck you this good?” he growls. 
A smirk curls your lips. He’s still milking this roleplay. He doesn’t voice it out, but he feels your pussy clench around him. You like this.
“Only you,” you moan, your voice breathy.
“That’s right,” he groans, his tone low and possessive.
Jungkook's pace quickens, the slap of his hips against your ass echoing through the room, his thrusts relentless. The headboard bangs rhythmically against the wall. He yanks the chain of the handcuffs harder, pulling your body back onto him in sync with every deep, punishing thrust.
Your body trembles beneath him, your moans now uncontrollable as the pressure builds to an almost unbearable height. Every drive of his cock inside you sends a jolt of pleasure through your body, his roughness pushing you to the brink. His deep groans mix with your cries, the heat between you reaching its peak, and you can feel yourself getting closer, your climax just within reach.
“You’re gonna cum for me, aren’t you?” he teases, his voice rough and low, dripping with lust. The heat in his tone sends another wave of pleasure coursing through you, and you can only nod, your voice caught in your throat as a moan escapes your lips, barely coherent.
His cock drags against your walls, hitting that perfect spot over and over, each thrust igniting a fire within you. Your body is a live wire, every nerve ending alight with sensation as the pressure coils tighter and tighter inside you, building towards a breaking point.
“Come on then, baby,” he growls, pulling you back hard against him, his grip firm and possessive. “Be a good officer and cum. I deserve it, don’t I?”
“Yes! Yes! You deserve it so much!” you manage to reply, the words spilling from your lips like a prayer.
“I’m such a good boy for you, huh?” he presses, his breath hot against your ear, his hips driving deeper.
“Such a good boy, my baby,” you affirm, your voice trembling with need. 
With a few more final, deep thrusts, your body shudders as the last waves of your sweet release ripple through you, your pussy clenching tightly around him. That tightness pushes Jungkook over the edge, and with a loud, needy moan, he releases into you, his hips faltering as he shoots his load deep inside. His groan fills the room as his cock throbs within you, emptying himself completely, the warmth of his cum spreading through you.
For a moment, the only sound is both of your heavy breathing, the heat of the moment still lingering in the air as your bodies stay connected.
Jungkook carefully unlocks the handcuffs, freeing your wrists from the restraints. He tosses them aside, his concern immediately turning to you as he notices the redness on your skin. Gently, he takes your wrists in his hands, massaging them softly, his brows furrowed with worry.
“I wasn’t too rough, was I?” he asks, his voice tender and full of concern.
“No, baby,” you reassure him, leaning in to kiss his lips softly, easing the tension he’s holding onto. You give him a few more sweet pecks, including one on his cheek, his boyish charm making you smile.
After cleaning up and peeing to avoid an infection, he helps you settle into bed, pulling you into his arms. His warmth envelops you, his face nestled against your neck, and you feel the soft brush of his breath against your skin. Your arms wrap around him instinctively, holding him close as the moment quiets. The heat from your bodies mingles with the gentle stillness of the room, creating a cocoon of intimacy and comfort that lulls you both toward sleep.
As your eyes grow heavy, his voice breaks the silence, low and a little playful. "I think I enjoyed that costume more than I thought," he murmurs against your neck.
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marcyvampire · 1 month ago
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The Wildcard!
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pairings ⸺ Mother! Harley Quinn x Child! Reader.
(PLATONIC FIC)
¿Request? Yes!
This is a Headcanon!
sinopsis ⸺ Being a kid raised under the Joker’s wing isn’t exactly what anyone imagines when they talk about a "good childhood." I mean, it’s not like you’re gonna get bedtime stories when your father figure is a psychopathic clown, right? Although, now that I think about it, he probably did tell you stories before bed—just that his versions ended with explosions and maniacal laughter instead of happy endings. You never really know with him.
But, hey! There was always mom Harley. And while she wasn’t exactly the classic model of a devoted mother, Harley definitely had her moments. Those times when she’d look at you with those big, wide eyes and promise she’d protect you from everything, even from herself. And that says a lot, considering that sometimes even she didn’t know who she needed to protect herself from.
warnings ⸺ Fluff and Angst, Platonic Cuddling, ¿OOC Harley? Idk, Disturbing Content, Street Fights, Violence, Blood, Trauma, Phobias.
Guide! Pt.2
A/N ── Yes, damn it, yes! My first request! Thank you so much, really, thank you! No need to clap, I’ll get all blushy uwu. I put all my love and care into this. Hope you enjoy it to the fullest!
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In reality, you were not her biological child. She knew that very well, and moreover, she knew that Mr. J would never want a child with her. In fact, it had never been part of the plan. "Kids are a hassle" the Joker would say, with that shrill laugh that coursed through his body like an electric shock. And Harley, well, she didn't exactly want a baby either. Until she found you.
Harley found you among the rubble, covered in blood, although it wasn't yours (at least that's what she hoped). You couldn't have been more than five months old, and there was no trace of your mother. At that moment, her intentions weren't exactly maternal, but what could you expect from a criminal at 2 AM? However, something in your little eyes disarmed her. You were small, defenseless, and upon seeing you… well, she simply couldn't resist.
Thus began your life with Harley Quinn. It wasn't the most typical childhood, that's for sure. Mr. J saw it as just one of his whims, and as long as you didn't cry and stayed out of his business, you were welcome. According to him, it was easier to raise a little clown from childhood.
To begin with, your toys were not exactly "age-appropriate." Mr. J had a fixation with explosives, so more than once you found yourself playing with what you hoped was an innocent candy box, only for Harley to shout from across the room: "Honey, no! That's not a toy, it's dynamite! Give me that!"
Ah, motherhood. A tough job, yes, but also something Harley never thought would come to her in such an… unexpected way. In her former life, when she was still Dr. Quinzel, she envisioned a normal existence, perhaps with a good job that would provide stability. But well, one thing led to another, and there she was, raising a baby who wasn't biologically hers, but whom life —and Gotham— had placed in her arms. And although her life with the Joker was total chaos, she always made sure of one thing: that you were safe.
In her twisted way of seeing the world, Harley protected you even from him, from Mr. J himself. She knew how unpredictable the Joker could be, so she did everything possible to make sure you were never in the same room for too long. And even though it sometimes seemed like the Joker didn't even notice your existence, Harley made sure to keep that distance. "I want you to be different" she would tell you while fixing your hair with a smile, "I don't want you to end up fistfighting with Batman like mommy."
Harley loved playing with you, especially at being doctors. There was something almost nostalgic for her in that, as if every time she saw you healing your dolls, a small part of the old Dr. Quinzel awakened within her. She loved seeing you with your toy stethoscope, focused as if you were in the middle of a serious operation.
"Mom! Miss JeanieBeanie had a broken heart, and I healed her with words! Just like you told me." Harley smiled, that big, bright smile that only she could make, and although she always tried to maintain the toughness of her persona, she couldn't help but let a tear escape. "Ah, sweetie, you're a genius."
And then, of course, there was the topic of school. You couldn't attend school known as the Joker's kid, that was for sure. So with a little colorful dye, a lot of makeup in the morning, and some nice clothes, Harley would take you to school incognito, as if you were a completely normal child. At least, she tried to make you seem that way. The first days were a disaster, though.
It wasn't that Harley didn't trust the school's safety, but, of course, being the Joker's Queen left her paranoid. So there she was, lurking around the windows of your classes, hiding behind bushes, trying to ensure that no madman would come in with a Kalashnikov to disrupt your school life. Sure, she was kicked out most of the time, but she always returned. Harley always returned.
Sometimes, when she couldn't see you during recess, she'd send you hidden messages in your lunchbox, with little doodles and silly jokes that made you laugh out loud. She worried a lot about you not making friends. "Remember, sweetie, if any kid bothers you, just smile like me and show them who's boss. But don't hit them, okay? Save that for later."
When the Joker finally broke up with her, it was a disaster, like a train derailing in slow motion. But just like with everything else, Harley made sure that the blow didn't fall on you. She never let Mr. J's chaos reach you because you were her priority, her sweetie. So, holding her hand, you left with her without looking back, with her suitcase in one hand and a bat in the other.
Since then, life became a bit more complicated, but also freer. Harley and you had to make do by stealing to survive, moving from place to place until ending up in a small apartment in Gotham's Chinatown. It wasn't the best area, but hey, it had charm. There, the nights were long, the walls thin, and the sounds of street fights mixed with your laughter while you tried to do homework and Harley gave you "life advice" that included how to escape from the police in style.
"Do you know what's faster than a bullet?" she'd say while looking at your face painted in bright colors before running off with a stolen shopping cart. "You, with the right attitude!"
Harley let herself go with alcohol during some tough times, but she always kept you away from that dark side. Sure, she bought a hyena and named it Bruce, which was simply hilarious. Bruce, like that perfect man on the magazine covers that you both secretly adored. "Bruce, come here, let's go for a walk!" you'd hear her shout down the street, and the neighbors wouldn't even blink. It was Gotham, after all.
By then, you were almost done with school. Amid the chaos of your life, you made a friend... Damian something (Wayan or something like that, you were bad with names). He wasn't the friendliest person in the world; in fact, "brat" would be a kind description, but for some reason, he intrigued you. "Mom says that if a boy or girl seems cute to you, you should go for it!" you told him once, repeating Harley's wise advice. Of course, Damian just looked at you like you were the weirdest thing he'd ever seen (and mind you, he had seen weird things; he's 'friends' with the nerd Jon). And although he maintained his air of arrogance, you found him adorable in a way that even he didn't understand.
Some nights, Harley and you would just lie on the rooftop of some building, looking at the lights of Gotham. With bags of marshmallows stolen from a grocery store, you'd roast them with a lighter while she told you stories. But not normal stories, rather ones involving car chases and explosions. No princesses and castles, more like villains and spectacular escapes. Sometimes, Selina Kyle would join in. "It's easier than you think" she'd say, winking at you while showing you how to sneak into a museum without setting off the alarms. It was never a typical childhood, but it sure was entertaining.
When Harley joined (temporarily) the Birds of Prey, things started to improve a little. You had more people around you, like a dysfunctional family you didn't know you needed. The girls tried to be a good influence, although with Harley, that was always relative. But at least there were fewer explosions and more quiet nights; just that "quiet" in Harley's terms meant motorcycle races, sporadic thefts, and bar fights. Pure fun!
And occasionally, Ivy, her "friend," would come to visit them. You thought she was amazing, so elegant, so calm... You knew there was something more there. "Kiss already!" you shouted at them once, laughing, watching how Harley blushed slightly while Ivy rolled her eyes with a smile.
But despite everything, Harley never stopped being an incredible mom, in her own way. On the toughest nights, when you'd curl up in her lap after a long day, she'd stroke your hair and whisper, "You know, sweetie, I never thought I'd be a mom, but you're the best thing that ever happened to me." And although it wasn't a typical motherhood, there was something comforting in knowing that amidst all that chaos, you could always count on her.
So, amid thefts, stolen marshmallows, and moments filled with love, Harley gave you a childhood that wasn’t normal, but was filled with adventures, laughter, and unconditional love. And what more could you ask for when you have Harley Quinn as your mom?
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A/N ─── My first request uwu~ I’m so excited! I really hope I did it well, and that you all like this little headcanon. I put all my love into it, so if you have more ideas or want to request something, don’t hesitate! I’m here for whatever you need.
Take a bath!
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superbat-love · 6 months ago
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Bruce Wayne found himself in a rare moment of social unease as he sat across from the Kents in their humble farmhouse. It was his first time meeting Clark’s parents, and he felt tenser than the time the Joker had dangled him over a shark tank.
"So, Bruce," Jonathan began, “I hear you're quite the successful businessman in Gotham. Any truth to the rumors of a vault overflowing with diamonds?"
Bruce, without skipping a beat, replied seriously, "Actually, it's full of kryptonite, not diamonds."
Jonathan's laughter died. He cleared his throat, forcing a smile. "Well, that’s certainly a unique hobby, Bruce."
"Hobby?" Bruce repeated, genuinely confused. "It’s not a hobby, Mr. Kent. It’s for protection, in case Superman loses control and becomes a threat to us all."
Martha's hand shot up to her chest, a gasp escaping her lips at the thought of Clark trapped in a room full of kryptonite. Clark leaned in, smiling proudly. "Bruce always thinks ahead!"
Jonathan and Martha stared at Clark as if he had just declared his love for Darkseid, exchanging uneasy glances. Laughing awkwardly, Martha quickly changed topics. As the evening wore on, Bruce found himself consumed by guilt, convinced that he had left a terrible impression on the Kents.
Later, driving back to Gotham, the silence in the car was heavier than Bruce’s heart.
"That.. didn’t go so well," Bruce finally said.
Clark glanced at him. "You haven’t done anything wrong, Bruce. You just have a very... unique way of showing you care. My parents will understand once they’ve gotten to know you better."
"Alfred told me to just be myself," Bruce muttered.
Clark chuckled. "Right. Well, maybe next time we can work on a less... apocalyptic way to impress my parents."
Bruce nodded. “I’m glad I didn’t tell them about the Phantom Zone projector in the vault.”
844 notes · View notes