#i love years in review
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
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I posted 1,696 times in 2022
174 posts created (10%)
1,522 posts reblogged (90%)
Blogs I reblogged the most:
@tinymacaroni
@lenasai
@supersoftie
@fission-fusion
@lesbeancats
I tagged 969 of my posts in 2022
Only 43% of my posts had no tags
#favorite - 28 posts
#me - 24 posts
#my face - 22 posts
#pottery - 10 posts
#the murderbot diaries - 10 posts
#cute art - 10 posts
#reference - 10 posts
#ceramics - 10 posts
#naddpod - 9 posts
#murderbot - 9 posts
Longest Tag: 127 characters
#me and my sister would play 102 dalmatians when we were younger and for a while i told her that she was in control of attacking
My Top Posts in 2022:
#5
ditto bowl!
60 notes - Posted May 11, 2022
#4
frog mug!!
81 notes - Posted May 23, 2022
#3
hello tumblr users
102 notes - Posted April 20, 2022
#2
goodbye manscaped hello catholicism
136 notes - Posted April 16, 2022
My #1 post of 2022
See the full post
172 notes - Posted October 21, 2022
Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →
#year in review#sorry to be cringe on main#i love years in review#put it under a readmore at least lol
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if you havent read my wife's gf fanfic WHAT ARE YOU DOING!!
(no sound)
#gravity falls#billford#gf theseus' guide#bill cipher#stanley pines#stanford pines#mabel pines#dipper pines#m.png#love having secret spoiler knowledge so i know whats on mabels sweater#4 hard years of learning storyboarding in college and the first animatic i make in the YEARS since i graduated....... is for a gf fic#who would have seen this coming... not me.... but then who would have thought my wife was a FUCKING GENIUS#if ur still not sold. my brother in laws review of the fic is 'it feels like im watching an episode of gravity falls'#and i gotta agree. the tone and characters are fucking nailed the whole way through#and chapter 7 makes me cry 👍
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#studyabroad#studyinspo#studyspiration#studyspo#studystudystudy#studyvisa#study motivation#student life#study aesthetic#italy#studying#self help#taylor swift#biology#blue#book review#baking#blogging#banana#beautiful#basketball#books#blog#study korean#dutch language#one year later#i love her#study mode#macha#breakfast
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❗❗Official Class Swap Sorcerer!Kristen Post Alert❗❗ you can: look at her
#dimension 20#fantasy high#fhjy#kristen applebees#fh class quangle#sorcerer!kristen is uh. Not Home Anymore! she's been couch surfing along with jawbones before freshman year#I think this kinda falls into a slight teen-witch-esque approach which I do like#since I've been pulling from like. matilda and pippi longstocking for these designs. the Exceptional Little Girls kinda genre#it does make her look younger than her peers which I do like. I feel like a big part of sorcerer!kristen's deal is that she's never#taken seriously. frequently treated like she doesn't know what's good for her. fellow adhd havers make some noiseee#but! upon review I feel like there's also a kinda ms. frizzle turn to her design? which like. awesome thats the lesbianism nailed babeyy#the fuckoff giant thermos as arcane focus is a homage to pete conlan but also crucially#if you swing that thing by the cord I think you can take off someone's head easy. I think that's the important thing#her cargo shorts are not of holding but functionally Everything is in there. scrunchies pencils spare gold chapsticks paperclips multitools#tbh I personally love the progression in her design lol she starts out like ''oh this young girl is a bit unkempt'' and#becomes ''oh this person is insane'' by junior year which is really awesome imo. I love that#its just fig left! I mean her freshman year design is pretty much set for me. I just need to figure out the rest#gorgug is kinda aerith in junior year I wonder if I can softly turn fig tifa-ward lol... ooh I have ideas now. this is gonna be fun#but for now. enjoy evening! may we all make like lizard and enjoy sun
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Okay, review time!! If you are one of the oddballs who thinks you cant be critical of something you love I suggest you stop reading now before I ruffle your feathers. Iron flame, second in the empyrean series. I am gonna start with what I was not a fan of and then go into the shit I adored.
1) what in the actual fuck was the pacing of this book?? I can tell you what, it was non existent. There was none. Where I thought there was a lot of filler in the last book there was none in this one. We got snap shots of conversations and then *boom* more plot flew at you. The timeline of this book greatly suffered for it i think bc we end only a couple weeks, if that, after threshing, which happens sometimes in October. This book was actually so wild with times.
2) while it was a spectacular cliff hanger, xaden becoming venin pisses me off. Especially if Rebecca yarros isnt going to have him tell violet. Like if that small tid bit of a conversation we got wasnt him telling vi that he was venin then the entire romantic conflict of this book was rendered pointless and their going to be having the same fucking fight for the rest of the series and at rhat point I give up.
3) I understand that the revolution is trying to take down basgaith and make the world better or whatever the fuck but can someone actually formulate a real plan for me?? Because I feel like their mission is just, giving violet and xaden something to be pissed at each other about.
4) the entirety of cats character. I get that she was set up as a spin on the typical jealous ex. Like having her be bitter about xaden picking violet over her but OH WAIT it wasnt actually about the man it was about the crown, oohh not like other girls. Im a writer too I see the point. I dont care. I think it was trashy. If you wanted her to be a bitter spiteful ex then have her be a bitter spiteful ex, the whole crown thing was shallow.
OKAY haters your time is up now onto the shit that made my heart hurt with joy and sadness
1) xadens arc in this book. I really liked that he went from "transparency is never gonna happen" to losing his fucking mind over violet and giving her everything. I love feral men and he qualifies. I think his arc was really well done and i liked it.
2) I appericiate that violet stuck to her guns for this book. She wouldnt let xaden off without a fight and I loved that. She made him bow and scrape and I was eating it up. It was spectacular.
3) the throne room scene. Violet on the throne. "Im making a temporary point not a lasting vow of maschocism" xaden being feral.
4) that gets its own point actually, just xaden being completely feral this entire book healed a part of my soul.
5) andarna's little speech at the end where she was like "I waited for you violet" made me ugly cry. That was just so hopelessly good I loved it. Andarna in general heals my heart but that part was just *chefs kiss*
6) tarin being completely and utterly ready to eat people this entire book. Just, at every turn "I want lunch their pissing me off " was spectacular
7) every scene their squad was in. Rihannon, violet, sawyer and ridoc are my roman empire. Their bond is so amazing. The fact that they launched a rescue mission for violet. Rihannon being ready to kill xaden at every turn. Ridoc being so platonically and adorably in love with violet. Just- augh happy cries happy cries. I love it all. Their so special tbh.
8) I love xaden actually, just, the whole book every scene hes in lives in my brain.
9) I liked that we saw a small bit of violet being feral this book too. I hope that we get more of that in future books. I want more of violet losing her fucking mind. Hot, badass women covered in blood
10) Liam. Fucking Liam. When violet was kidnapped and Liam was there. Now, do I logically understand that he was a hallucination, yes, do i care?? No. He was a gift from Maleck I will be hearing no critiques on that. It was so fucking sweet and amazing. I love violet and Liam and Liam being dead so horribly breaks my heart. I loved Liam. Liams death lives rent free in my skull.
#i might add more to this later#please#i am begging yall#dont get weird#i am allowed to love this book and have critical opinions abt it#if i start getting threats about my fandom opinions again i might lose my mind#haters get fucked#anyways#i need the third book right now and the fact that i wont get it until next year kills me a little#i loved iron flame#i loved fourth wing#xaden riorson#violet sorrengail#violet and xaden#fourth wing#iron flame#book review#iron flame review#🪓
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for all those who have never watched infinity train! (if you have seen it just wait a week ok? ok)
#infinity train#polls#finally putting this out there for the FIVE YEAR ANNIVERSARY OMG (august 5)#is this an old trend yes but i love clicking buttons and you should too#peer reviewed by my friend to make it difficult >:)#and after u vote put this show on ur watchlist its so good
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art trade stuff for @sharkflan ! love these thangs
#my art#illustration#furry#anthro#monster#had a lot of fun doodling these guys#i believe i've said this before but flan's stuff is rockin go check it out!!!!!!#also scrumping season is over so here's the reviews: terrible year for apples and pears. incredible year for plums damsons greengages#if you've never tried a greengage you have GOT to try one they're the most beautiful fruit known to man#oh and blackberries/cherries/berries in general did good this year too they were tasty#i love picking fruit so much i was put on this earth to forage i think
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No spoiler personal and honest opinion about Dragon Age the Veilguard
[😀]
Battle is really fun. Even though I love DAO, I’m not typically a fan of tactical combat, and this might be the first DA game where I actually enjoyed the battle.
I like the expanded companion quests. I loved Lucanis' the most.
Semi-realistic comic style works better than I’d expected. The visuals and animations were solid overall, at least for me (still thinking about how Lucanis looked at Rook in that romance scene 👁️👁️). Except for the heavy filters and flashy effects; those were a bit much.
[😐]
Too much repetition. The game recaps constantly, which becomes dull. Like they worried old DA fans won’t remember what just happened a minute ago.
Romance isn’t big compare to previous games. Honestly feels like the weakest romance content of any DA game (well I only remember how much I loved and giggled so much in the old games). Maybe it’s because events in this game unfold so quickly? Just don't expect the same level of content as in DAI. Though, this is just my issue—if you don’t care about romance, it’s fine.
Unfinished story potential. There’s good material here, but it feels half-done. A shame... really.
Choices feel fake. You get three dialogue options, but they’re just slight tone variations of the same line. If you like to playing a jerk in BioWare games, you might be disappointed.
Inconsistent story details. I’m not a lore expert and don’t remember all the characters, but even I noticed some parts didn’t add up well—almost like the writers forgot details from past games too so they just brushed them off. Also removing many choices from earlier games didn’t help; it only made things more questionable.
It’s a fun game that I enjoyed a lot and will replay it just to see Solas again, but do I love it as a DA? I'm not sure.
It’s not about new setting or tone. I was fine with a fresh protag. But now, after finishing this, keeping the Inquisitor as the protag for this end of the Dread Wolf saga would’ve made much more sense to me. I would’ve loved to see the old, ragged Inquisitor raging again like in Trespasser, and give a proper farewell to both the Inquisitor and Solas, whether you swore to save him or not. The writing in this game seems just lacking. In any case, I was just glad to see Solas again and listen to him talking💓 Gareth really nailed it again. The emotion in his voice, I just 😭 I swear Garrus and Solas can send me with their voice alone. Now, I'll just go and sobbing in the corner👍
#i don't usually write reviews but I love Solas and DA so much#and it's been 10 years since DAI so#I just had to get this out of my system#random
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This Week in BL - People of Earth we have VERSE rep in 2 Thai BLs! Amazeballs!
Organized, in each category, with ones I'm enjoying most at the top.
March 2024 Wk 3
Ongoing Series - Thai
Deep Night (Thurs iQiyi) ep 2 of 8 (10?) - Everyone seems to be a bit of a player and I’m not mad about it. It’s nice to see high-grade flirting, and I really love how very gay the leads feel. Not BL gay. Actual gay. We shall see how it goes, I suspect we are in "messy gay" territory in which case, I predict utter carnage and that this show will drop ranks precipitously for me. But right now? Of all the Thai BLs airing, I'm enjoying this the most. How bizarre.
I like the side couple (thrupple?) too, despite the prat fall kiss and possible cheating. They very pretty:
To Be Continued (Thai C3 Thailand grey) ep 4 of 8 - oh dear NO honeychild, face masks are gross tasting!
Rule no 966 of the BL world. He’s never asleep.
Argh Achi wants Ji so bad. Nice mutual kiss tho, despite Ji's baggage. I guess Ji knew what would happen if Achi stayed? But why is he so scared? Just deeply closeted? The backstory is very high school achy and I feel like it explained Achi but not Ji. And the crying in the movie was lovely, so we totally understand Achi's but Ji is just messed up and confused? I admit to being a bit confused too. Why is Ji the one so angry?
On a totally different aside, I really like how the set dressing is done in Ji’s apartment. It looks lived in and not staged. Super rare in Thai BL. I'm reminded of Ai & Pond's dorm room in Love By Chance, which actually looked like a real college dorm.
City of Stars (Fri iQIYI) ep 7 of 12 - Why is it always the pulps that actually trot out the best communication, conversation, consent, and healthy relationships? Yes I'm still wincing over the truly bad acting but I’m enjoying their good relationship. The sex scene was sweet and tender, although the likelihood of rose petals getting stuck places wigs me out. (Flower petals + lube = terrible combination. Just FYI.)
ALL PRAISE VERSE REP! And a bottom who owns it! Yay!
1000 Years Old ep 5 of 12 - How ridiculously colorful and flirty they all are. There is nothing at all vampire about this show. I’m a bit bored by the restaurant plot but I'm tuning in for the bonkers approach to goth. How dare they be so cheerful with my precious emo youth, but also, how very Thai pulp of them.
Ongoing Series - Not Thai
Unknown (Taiwan Tues Youku YouTube) ep 4 of 11 - oh it’s SO GOOD. Reading the yaoi and crying. COME ON TAIWAN HAVE MERCY. The red wrapping of the hands (red thread, yes yes we get it). The boy who doesn’t want to box for so many reasons. Not the least of which is how unpleasant it is to spar with a lover.
This is easily the best BL currently airing and it is going to hurt us. But I don't care. I love it.
AntiReset (Taiwan Fri Viki/Gaga) eps 8 of 10 - This show is dangerously cute and I’m scared for everyone involved, including me.
Love is Better the Second Time Around AKA Koi wo Suru nara Nidome ga Joto (Japan Gaga) ep 2 of 6 - Poor baby thrown in all willynilly amongst a pack of queeny bitchy gay intellectuals. I'd be lost too. It's the worse kind of fight, one you have to philosophize your way out of.
Although I Love You and You AKA Sukiyanen Kedo Do Yaro ka (Japan Thurs Gaga) ep 10fin - They are extremely adorable and it was a very good ending - mature, adult, and bittersweet. I liked it a lot. But I didn’t love it the way I wanted to.
The promise of this show, younger cook courts older divorced office worker, should have been my catnip. I mean if someone pitched this to me in an elevator I would have downloaded it by the second storey. Unfortunately, it did not exactly fulfill that promise, not in the way I'd hoped. Did I still enjoy the ride, yes, but I feel just a little let down. 8/10
My Strawberry Film (Japan Thurs Gaga) eps 5 of 8 - Honestly now I’m just shipping the two girls getting together. Frankly, I really don't like this show, and normally I'd DNF but there's only a few eps left and nothing else is airing rn.
It's done, ready to binge, maybe I'll finally get to it this weekend
What Did You Eat Yesterday Season 2 AKA Kinou Nani Tabeta? Season 2 (Japan Gaga) 10 eps
The Servant and the Young Master (Vietnam YouTube)
Began Beginning (Myanmar YouTube) - A Burmese BL? @heretherebedork vouched for it, so I will watch eventually.
It's airing but...
Time the series (Tue Gaga/YT) 10 eps - it's finished now, I dropped it at ep 4. Should I bother?
Close Friend Season 3: Soju Bomb! (Thai ViuTV grey) 10 eps - I'm exhausted by this franchise and the variety pack style of BL. If there is a particularly good couple (or installment) I might watch it, but I'm letting others decide for me.
A Secretly Love (Thai WeTV grey) 10 eps - I watched the first ep but grey is too much work for this inferior of a show. I may pick up and binge if it gets distribution but for now, it gets a DNF from me. KimCop might have held this crap together but Kim without Cop? No thank you.
Lady Boy Friends (Thai WeTV grey) 16 eps - reminds me a bit too much of Diary of Tootsies only high school, not my thing. DNF unless it turns a corner and is truly amazing for some reason.
Gossip
The choreo controversy - Deep Night vs OnlyOneOf. Look, like a musical rift, or a styling photoshoot, there are no new ideas in choreo, I feel like Madonna did this pose too, a long time ago. Certainly someone in the 80s. Or whatever. Anygay, it's an ironic thing to see a Thai BL being called out by a gay-branded Kpop group when both are exploiting eroticized homosexuality for commercial profit... just saying. (HOW DID WE GET HERE?) Not to mention that BOTH are ALSO exploiting the kink community. We live in interesting times, BLabies. In the end, it's a good publicity stunt all round. And I think Nine knows exactly what he's doing (and why he is doing it). Finally: Drama drama drama around coreo? That is V gay boys. Fun fun fun, carry on everyone.
Strike a pose.
You're being recorded for posterity.
Next Week Looks Like This:
Starting
3/21 Two Worlds (Thai IQIYI) 10 eps - One of those "he's dead Jim so time travel" thingames staring MaxNat. I'm over this concept but Asia flipping loves it and I do enjoy MaxNat. Phupha (Gun) and Khram (Nat) love each other but Phupha is murdered. Then Khram is pulled to a parallel world where, 12 years ago, Khram and Tai (Max) were in love. However, Khram was killed by Tai’s dad. Now Tai finds alter-Khram apparently alive. But then there is ALSO an alter-Phupha to deal with. (Phupha is played by Gun Thanawat who was Khom, the repressed butler bodyguard from Unforgotten Night. We like this, we scared of the love triangle aspect.)
Upcoming BLs for 2024 are listed here. This list is not kept updated, so please leave a comment if you know something new or RP with additions.
Forgive me a moment of industry noodling?
Have ya noticed that it's slender pickings right now but it shouldn't be? This is not the mid summer slump nor end of year lull. We should be getting some heavy hitters on first quarter release. (Side eyes GMMTV. Perhaps those painful Japanese acquisitions were a bigger issue than any of us realized?)
Anygay, IMHO, Thailand's BL bubble has popped and sponsor money is drying up. This is my shocked face:
Look, the 2021-2023 level of release and growth (exponential) was never gonna be sustainable, so I'm not surprised. I suspect that in 2024 Thailand will actually produce fewer BLs than 2023 (73, 64 in 2022, and 40 in 2021).
I know I'm sticking my neck out predicting any film industry but... I have seen this kinda thing before and it just *feels* like shrinkage. Thai BL's load has been shot, my peeps. (Not to be crass or anything.)
Oh, don't worry you pretty head about it, it's not going away, just getting less prolific.
Don't we all in our old age?
THIS WEEK’S BEST MOMENTS
My favorite trope, sniff him!
Queen. (both Deep Night)
King. (City of Stars)
Verse rep verse rep verse rep!!! Can you see me doing a little dance this side of the screen?
(Last weeks summation)
Streaming services are listed by how I'm (usually) watch, which is with a USA based IP, and often offset by a day because time zones are too much work.
The tag BLigade: @doorajar @solitaryandwandering @my-rose-tinted-glasses @babymbbatinygirl @babymbbatinygirl @isisanna-blog
If ya wanna be tagged each week leave a comment and I will add you to the template. Easy peesy.
#thai bl#to be continued the series#city of stars#thai bl pulp#japanese bl#AntiReset#taiwanese bl#unknown the series#Although I Love You and You#Sukiyanen Kedo Do Yaro ka#1000 Years Old#To Be Continued#deep night the series#deep night#Although I Love You and You review#bl series review#upcoming bl#bl news#bl updates#this week in bl
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Coming in late on this one, but if you're saying you're not planning on your work being piblished... but isnt there a graphic novel coming out soon? There was a link to pre-order it at least via bookshop or barnes and noble (can't remember which off the top of my head). Were you able to get your blook distributed to them as a self-piblished creator? Or was the graphic novel trad-pub and you're just saying you can't see your prose writing/books getting published?
what a funny thing to gotcha me on
yes, i do have a traditionally published graphic novel coming out. under a different name. in a different genre. for a different audience. it's not relevant for me to bring it up every time somebody asks me here if my work will ever be physically printed because it's not the work they're asking about.
so yeah. the last thing you said.
#it is so funny that i ended up so much more popular under this name than the sfw name#so people just don't know that i have already had a successful career in comics for years#i wrote for the steven universe comics#i had a popular webcomic for eight years#my debut graphic novel has a starred review in publisher's weekly#all utterly irrelevant to whether my $5 naughty books will ever be printed on paper#tt asks#i love to brag but i only love to brag when it's funny to brag
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"Tess was a performance artist and part-time jewelry maker who now worked as a set designer. [...] The first night we spent together, I taught her to knit — my classic seduction technique (High Femme Camp Antics, or HFCA) — and about frisson, that carbonated feeling that accompanies a crush. We stared at each other for a long time, unblinking. Because I knew that this otherwise might take forever (lesbians!), I finally asked Tess point-blank if she felt a frisson for me (HFCA). In response, Tess kissed me hard, with teeth. I knew she wanted to fuck, but I pushed her hands away dramatically when they crept under my skirt (HFCA). I told her that I didn’t typically sleep with people so soon (HFCA), which was true not for any real reason but because I was privately humiliated by my body (HFCA). Instead of letting her fuck me, I scratched Tess’s entire torso with my long, pink fingernails (HFCA). “Her fingernails drifted down my neck, across my shoulders,” Jess Goldberg, the butch narrator of Stone Butch Blues, says of a high femme whose camp antics thrill her. “I’d forgotten the sheer pleasure of a high femme tease.” “Your fingernails are full of frisson,” Tess said as morning light began to stream in through the window above her bed. “I know,” I said. I recently read a collection of funny stories by Lesléa Newman, high-femme chronicler of dyke life in the 1990s (the materialistic, shopping-addicted Golden Age of HFCA). In one story, a butch named Flash arrives to pick Lesléa up and take her out to dinner. Flash politely tells Lesléa that she looks nice. “The average femme would have taken that to be a compliment,” Lesléa dishes. “But this high-maintenance femme hadn’t spent the last two weeks shopping for the perfect outfit and the last seven hours bathing, shaving, bleaching, filing, polishing, combing, brushing, drying, moussing, spritzing, spraying, and applying five pounds of makeup to have all her efforts summed up in one little four-letter word.” Flash’s flimsy compliment doesn’t satisfy Lesléa’s desires to be seen, appreciated, and worshiped, and so Lesléa starts from the bottom and works her way up, prompting Flash to compliment her shoes, her miniskirt, and finally her hair in a grand, shimmering pyramid of HFCA. But even as she performs satiation, Lesléa is insatiable. Her antics fail at getting her precisely what she wants from Flash, because there’s always something unsatisfying about getting what you want by asking for it. Lesléa’s desire glows from within the frame of her HFCA, distilled and exposed and unmet. Can I Come Inside, my high-femme sex game, deals primarily with unmet, outsourced, and circumnavigated desire. In Females (2019), trans lesbian critic Andrea Long Chu argues that femaleness is a universal, existential condition rather than a gender or a sex — a condition of being and of consciousness that involves letting others do our desiring for us. At stake in Can I Come Inside, as well as in HFCA at large, is a femaleness that both craves and rebels against its tendency to outsource desire. In playing Can I Come Inside, I, like Lesléa, ask Tess to do my desiring for me, and Tess in turn defers her desire to me: the game is strictly my desire, one that she insists she does not share. Even though it mandates a performance of aggressive desire from Tess, there’s no doubt that Can I Come Inside is about my desire; it’s my game; I make the rules."
-- An excerpt from "High Femme Camp Antics," an essay written by Jenny Fran Davis. (Emphasis in bold my own.)
#i apologize for length but also i really love this article#and i was struggling to figure out how to excerpt it for a while before concluding that this simply would HAVE to be long#i might put out a new post shortly with a shorter version#something much more succinct#femme#femme lesbian#high femme#thatbutcharchivist#archived#lesbian#dyke#lesbian literature#butch#high femme lesbian#butchfemme#femme4butch#butch4femme#high femme camp antics#author: jenny fran davis#year: 2020#publisher: los angeles review of books#queer femme
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Every so often I'm reminded of how many people don't realize just how high the bar is for indie titles to actually make enough money or gain enough recognition to be sustainable.
Like someone will say "I think it's great that mildly successful indie titles exist that no one has heard of before, such as [multi-award winning indie game that was incredibly financially successful that has had coverage by multiple major news outlets]! It's so nice small indies exist" :)
#like seriously i don't think some people understand how huge the discrepancy can be at times#sucks to hear 'i love small indies devs [literally one of the biggest indies out there]'#once you see how the sausage is made on how reviews correlate to sales some of the numbers are light years apart#thoughts#joker moment
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#studyabroad#study motivation#studyinspo#studyspiration#studyspo#studystudystudy#studyvisa#student life#study aesthetic#italy#music#skincare#studying#self help#book blog#snow#study#student#my notes#biology#blue#book review#the case study of vanitas#comfort food#ice cube#coffee is life#one year later#i love her#books and reading#study art
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Being a physically disabled Dimension 20 fan breaks my heart sometimes
I’ve been thinking about this since last Wednesday’s episode when we finally got a real scene with Lydia, one of the few physically disabled characters in the entire canon of the show. It was nice, but it was really just a lore dump. An excuse for exposition. A moment for Kristen to look good by expending sympathy/pity. (I’m a little frustrated about how that interaction went down. Extending the help action was nice but patronizingly touching the neck of a full-ass adult without consent was not. It was weird and not something she would have done to a nondisabled character).
I have watched almost all of D20 (still missing a couple of seasons) and as far as I know here’s where our list of canon physically disabled characters stand: Lydia Barkrock, Jan de la Vega (who feels pretty problematic to me, maybe more on that in a later post), one of the Dwarven statues in the temple in The Seven (who is not given the dignity of being brought to life like Asha), and Pete’s coworker in TUC2 who is in exactly one episode and is so unimportant I have forgotten his name. I guess you could make an argument that Gunny is disabled, but I don't feel that Lou or Brennan really talk about him or play him through that lens. So in terms of canon physically disabled PCs-- that leaves us with 0.
We do a bit better with neurodivergent characters and characters with mental health problems; Ayda (my beloved) is very well developed and Adaine is a PC. There have been some openly neurodivergent players, like Omar and Surena, whose characters also read ND to me. But that isn’t labeled or discussed in canon, so it's hard for me to know where to class that. I am going to focus the rest of this post on physical disabilities, since that is my area of lived experience. If another fan wants to write about their perspective of neurodivergence rep in the show, I would love to hear that, and will happily amplify.
There has never been a character with a sensory disability or a limb difference or a chronic illness (not a fantasy one, a real one) on Dimension 20. The only NPCs we have are nondescript, similar wheelchair users. And there has never been a physically disabled player at the table. On the flagship show of Dropout, a company founded on diversity and inclusion. It feels extremely pointed to me.
In fact as far as I can tell there has only been one (1) physically disabled performer on any of Dropout’s shows. (Shout out to Brett, you were great on Dirty Laundry.) Obviously I haven’t seen every episode of everything they have produced. If I have missed someone, please do let me know in the comments/reblogs. But it’s a problem. And Sam Reich even agreed with this criticism when I asked him directly about.
I do really hope they’re working on it, as Sam says. But why has it taken so long?
Dimension 20 has had trans and nonbinary and queer players. It has had players of many different races. I’m not saying that the diversity here is perfect; there should always be more POC in the dome, more queer people. We should keep pushing for that. (And we should also push for performers at the intersections of these identities!) But we’ve seen the ways this diversity has expanded and improved the different seasons, because diverse players create sensitively drawn, diverse player characters. They add details to their PC’s experiences that make them feel rich and alive. I’m thinking about each of Ally’s PC’s incredible capital G gender and Aabria “all my characters (even the stoats) are Black” and how excellent they all are. D20 would not be the show it is without this input.
And yet. And yet.
There are 1,000 interesting and complicated themes to explore around disability. Dealing with access. Dealing with ableism. Dealing with compassion and community care. Dealing with none of it and just being a cool fantasy or sci fi character that happens to be disabled. We don’t get any of it.
I watch my favorite show and I see myself in the ace rep and the female characters. But I don’t see all of me. I see a silent but ever present message: you aren’t quite welcome here.
I have this fantasy that I play in my brain sometimes that someday I’ll get to talk to Brennan in person, like maybe if I buy a VIP ticket and risk Covid to go to a live show or we run into each other on the street or something. I am able to look him in the eye and articulate why he NEEDS to include a physically disabled player in an upcoming season. I reference the ways he’s talked about inclusion and writing diversely on Adventuring Party. Maybe I hand him a handwritten letter, or hell, a printout of this post. And because he really cares about diversity and his shows and his fans he would listen to me, and cast a physically disabled performer in the next season.
But I think that might be giving that nondisabled man (whose work I adore, who I respect so much) too much credit. Because he’s had Jennifer Kretchmer, a physically disabled actual play performer, on adventuring academy to talk about access in gaming. He’s hired disability consultants. He knows about physically disabled people, enough to give us shoutouts as inconsequential npcs. And he still hasn’t thought to include us at the table. In over 20 seasons. None of that other stuff matters if we aren't given a seat at the story telling table, and the agency to craft our own narratives equal to other participants in the game.
When Lydia was telling her story in the last episode, I kept wishing for a prequel, where she is more than a plot delivery device and a kind but unimportant parent. I want to know about her adventures with her adventuring party. I want to see a talented, wheelchair-using actor play out the scene when she decides to put the gem in her chest. I want to hear about what happened after. I want to know how she survived. I want it so badly it hurts.
I am in the process of trying to find new indie actual plays that feature more disabled talent. I am learning how to GM myself so I can tell these kinds of stories. But it’s not the same as being a fan of something. Sometimes I don’t want to have to make my own representation. Sometimes I just want to turn on my favorite tv show, the one that I have cosplayed from and written metas about and loved whole heartedly, and see myself included.
If you’re another disabled or neurodivergent fan I’d love to hear your thoughts on this. If you’re not, I’d love for you to reblog this. I would love for the absence of physical disability in this show to be a topic of fandom conversation, at the very least.
#dimension 20#d20#my crip media reviews#being a fan is hard sometimes#and being disabled means you get left out of “diversity” all the time#I love this show so much it hurts#I wish it could love me back a little bit more#fantasy high junior year#fantasy high#my meta#dropout#dropout tv#Sam reich
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Do you have any clue when/why so many pre unova sitting cuties jumped in price? $17 +shipping is kind of ridiculous for plush as small as they are but less popular plush (registeel for example) stayed the original price I know pokemon is money hungry but I'm just kinda sad now
YEAH it's very absurd to me and i wish i could say there's an actual reason but it 100% is them just being greedy. the way they specifically advertise on the front page "popular sitting cuties restock!!!!" just to see $17 plushies that are literally only 4" tall in some cases is blatant price gouging. i get that popular pokemon will sell out a lot faster and some of their designs are pretty intricate, but there's no reason to jack the prices up THAT much. scrolling down pokemoncenter.com for reviews shaking my head visibly frowning if i'm honest
#ask#milo-melon#not a review#yes i love pokemon yes i hate the pokemon company <3#i got my breloom sitting cutie for like $10 a year ago now it's $17. stupid as hell
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yay ^_^
#electric dreams 1984#electric dreams#edgar electric dreams#madeline robistat#madeline electric dreams#this is a meeellion years old but haha i just finished it up#i love maddie x edgar it is my life force#i think i gave them a ship name? one sec#no... apparently not..#oh well ill do it now!#uhhhmmm i wanted a name based off the duel the track that plays when they play music together but i cant think of anything#well#madedgar ?#edgline#hmmm#idk#someone peer review if you wantt#ribsy art!!!!!!#yay yay yay
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