#i love the show fucking obviously but jesus h christ.
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flugame-mp3 · 8 months ago
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what do you fucking mean that's how charlie dies. THAT'S HOW CHARLIE DIES??? i mean i know the show has a penchant for killing off every character who's not a winchester brother or an angel of thursday but good god. what the fuck. charlie was such a good and enjoyable recurring character, and she had such a fandom impact that i've seen, and she's only around for THREE SEASONS?? (sidebar: it's amazing she has the presence she does for only being around for a couple episodes in the long run!) but: was this necessary? and she just dies offscreen after her skills are utilized to progress the plot of decoding the book of the damned?? oh my god. what in the actual fuck. i'm finding myself getting genuinely very upset at her death. she did not fucking deserve that. and i can absolutely see why the fan response to her death is what it is now. completely fucking unjustified and throwaway and useless.
#theo.txt#spn#charlie#spn spoilers#spn 10x21#almost none of the women who've gotten fridged on this show have deserved it but still#good god this one made me especially angry#why do you use this character for a plot point and then ship her off somewhere. to oz or to the afterlife. so often?#she was such a cool character with a good story that i enjoyed and related to and THIS is what they did with her?? and from my perusing she#doesn't even really come back like bobby occasionally does?? and his death. while devastating to me as somebody who really liked him. still#felt WAY better than this#sorry i ended that episode with my jaw on the fucking FLOOR oh my god. /neg#what did she have to die for? where is that post about female characters dying so male characters can feel sad but it's a gifset of all the#bullshit ass deaths of women on supernatural#i love the show fucking obviously but jesus h christ.#but also you know what. having the context that i have. still a fucked up thing to say but i see why dean says That to sam now during#charlie's funeral. it IS an interesting look into how they respond to the other one violating their wishes/freedoms and into their larger#dynamic actually! but thats not what this post is really about#wow. i am actually livid. poor fucking charlie.#if she was like a sister to the winchesters how about you bring her back huh? how about you revive her? jesus christ#i wonder what her heaven is like. i hope its dnd and movie night with the girls#i took a little break mid-typing this to see if i was just being insane and angry but no the super wiki has a whole section about the fan#outrage at charlie's death and the discussions it furthered about the show's misogynistic tendencies#and you know what? good!#ok anyway. im going to go browse charlie art and feel abnormal now.#supernatural#charlie bradbury
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ghost-proofbaby · 2 years ago
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twenty four hours (modern!eddie munson x fem!reader)
HOUR EIGHT
in which graves are dug up, walls are built, and nobody knows what happened in the bathroom that night.
→ tropes: enemies to lovers, forced proximity, slow burn
→ warnings: strong language, eventual smut, upside down does not exist, minors dni
→ wc: 4.6k+
masterlist.
spotify playlist.
◁ previous part, next part▷
8:00 ────ㅇ────────────── 24:00
DINGUS: hey, do you guys remember the first night they met? 
BIRDIE: you mean when we took her to the bar to meet everyone and they very clearly fell in love at first sight? no, doesn’t ring a bell. 
DINGUS: stop being such a fucking smart ass
NANCE: @DINGUS What about it? 
DINGUS: she just called me asking me about it. said eddie was nice until you guys went to the bathroom. apparently he acted differently when you guys came back, but i can’t remember anything about what was said?? did eddie actually start acting differently??? 
BIRDIE: i remember that! thought it was weird or eddie just started overthinking? i dunno. i was in the bathroom obviously.
ARGYLE  😎: oh i remember that night very clearly brochacho
ARGYLE  😎: kind of surprised you don’t, dude
JOHNNY: Oh God yeah @DINGUS you’re living up to your namesake dude
NANCE: You really don’t remember, do you? 
DINGUS: @NANCE and how the fuck do YOU remember? you weren’t even there, nance. you were in the bathroom as robs put it.
NANCE: Best friend privileges. You really might want to remember, Dingus. 
BIRDIE: @NANCE message me real quick? 
DINGUS: hey! no fucking whispering! that’s not fucking helpful! @JOHNNY @ARGYLE  😎 what did i say? 
NANCE: @BIRDIE I will. Let me call Eddie first.
HOUR EIGHT - 11:00 PM
You weren’t trying to eavesdrop - you were trying to sleep. If anyone asked you, you could have honestly defended yourself. The couch was uncomfortable, your back aching as you repeatedly twisted back and forth to just try and find a minute of rest. Your mind was reeling, still replaying all of your moments with Eddie leading up to this night. Suddenly, you were overthinking it all. You couldn’t differentiate between things that really happened, or things that you’d simply blown out of proportion due to your innate need to spin the narrative of Eddie being the villain. 
“Yeah, I… I think she’s sleeping.” 
You hadn’t even heard Eddie opening his door finally, your back facing the hallway as you stayed curled up tightly. His footsteps are heavy as he gets closer to you.
“She’s… uh, she’s on the couch.”
Immediately, you can hear a shrill voice shouting over the line. It’s hard to miss. You can imagine the way he’s wincing, holding the phone out from his ear in an attempt to not let her scolding damage his ear drums. 
“I didn’t think she went to bed!” he hisses, trying to stay quiet, under the impression you’re still asleep, “I- Jesus H. Christ, Nance! Calm down, calm do-” he’s cut off as the anger over the line still leaks into the calm air of the room, “No. No, I wasn’t- I was going to let- Nance. Please, can I get a fucking word in?” 
You hold your breath during his pause, and the clear scolding, Nancy’s scolding, finally ceases. 
“I wasn’t going to let her sleep on the couch,” he says slowly. You almost turn over, almost face him and show him you’re very much awake and not sleeping. “I didn’t think she’d go to bed while I was in there. I thought… I thought- Jesus, I thought at worst, she’d snoop through my shit. Maybe go for a walk or something. I didn’t- I just… Fuck, I needed space. It’s just been a long night.”
Nancy’s voice is no longer audible, but it’s clear he’s listening to what she has to say. You’re nearly overcome with guilt; you’ve done plenty of things wrong, but to eavesdrop on a private conversation? It might be your worst crime against Eddie yet. 
Suddenly, he says, “It’s just been a lot.” 
Something in his tone has changed. It’s gone soft, whispering from his lips in sudden muted blue. It’s a type of sadness you can’t quite place – it’s the kind of mourning you’d seen in his eyes in the photo. 
Nancy must say something, because he hums in response. It’s obviously not good enough of an answer for Nancy over the phone, because her voice grows back to audible levels, less shrill, more stern. 
Eddie answers with words this time. “I… I think I do.” 
He thinks he does what? 
“I do. I really fuckin’ do.”
He’s more sure in his answer the second time around to the unknown question. The guilt grows. Inflating, turbulating, ready to crack your ribs. The vines are no longer there to hold you together.
You’re put out of your misery when Eddie murmurs out a bye, Nance and you can hear his phone snap shut. If it were just a mere few hours ago, one hour ago, you would have made a comment about it - you would have joked again about what year it was, how maybe the two of you should get to sleep so first thing in the morning, you could drag him down to the Apple store to get a normal phone like the rest of you. But you’re not a time traveler, and Eddie is still an ocean away from you. 
And you’re not a strong swimmer. The water’s were rocky, were vicious, and if you dared to try and backstroke to his side of the water, you’d surely drown. He had to come to you. 
You’re praying he comes to you. Eyes tightly screwed shut, still resembling a ball on his old couch. 
Please reach out for me, your mind screams, please wake me up. Please tell me to come back to bed with you. Please tell me we can forget all the words said in the kitchen. Please, please, please. 
You don’t know where the pleading comes from. But whatever gods and goddesses may exist, whatever higher power in the Universe that would normally ignore you, hears out your silent pleas. 
His hand is warm when he first grabs your shoulder. 
It’s not rough, surprisingly gentle as fingertips press into your clothed skin and the first shake comes. It’s hardly enough to rouse a truly sleeping person. And Eddie realizes this as the second shake is a bit more firm, moving you a little more with a soft whisper of, “Hey, wake up.” 
The command isn’t as harsh as you’re used to from him. It’s crushed velvet, smoothing over your skin like the blanket you’d previously pondered for, making the guilt begin to deflate. A slow release of air and the accompanying feelings of dishonesty and disloyalty leaves your chest weathered when his next whisper comes not only louder, but closer.
“C’mon, you’ve gotta get up,” he insists, but all you care about is his cologne. He never changed it from that first night. Always something warm, always something spiced. And you hate it, because it’s still the feeling of coming home from a long week, “You’re not sleeping on the couch. I’ll carry you if I have to.” 
That makes your sleeping facade crack. Your lips betray you - one twitch, and Eddie knows you’re awake, pressing you to roll onto your back. 
“I know you’re awake now. Let’s go,” you can hear the dimples in his tone. You can picture the lazy smile, the shining eyes. With your eyes closed, you can pretend you never had to meet mean Eddie. When you’re not looking at him, it’s almost as if the man you initially met still exists, to have and to hold, to make inside jokes with as you let the scenery around the two of you fade to black. 
You crack your eyes back open to find him looking down at you just as you’d expected, but not nearly with as much mischief or mirth as you had craved. 
The Eddie you first met is gone. He’s not coming back, and you can’t live with your eyes closed. Hell, maybe he had drowned in that ocean between you two as well. 
Maybe if you took the leap, just attempted to take on the waves, you’d meet him somewhere at the bottom of it all. 
“I thought you said you’d carry me?” you tease. 
His hand. His hand is still on your shoulder, and his palm is still searing you. You couldn’t pull away from its burn if you tried. 
“I’d carry you if I had to,” he corrects, “You’re awake, therefore, I don’t have to.” 
“I don’t know. I think my legs may be broken.” 
Eddie says your name firmly. It takes you off guard, momentarily distracts you from the way he squeezes your shoulder, “Let’s go before I change my mind and leave you out here.” 
You decide against putting up any further fight. You’re just happy he’s talking to you again. How odd and peculiar that feeling is. 
You rise from the couch and take him in. He’s no longer in his jeans, having traded out his earlier day clothes for something more comfortable. A pair of comfortable grey sweatpants, one or two sizes too big with the drawn string pulled to its limit and tied into a knot. He’s wearing a faded band shirt, loved in every way possible: it’s been cut along the bottom to shorten it in length, several holes torn along the torso and in the neck hole, the once black fabric now a stormy shade of grey far darker than the sweatpants. There’s a logo across the chest, peeling away at the edges. 
“Deftones?” you ask, squinting to make out the words written amongst the logo, “What is that? A band?” 
He chuckles, almost in disbelief, before he realizes you’re serious, “Wait, you’ve really never heard of them?” 
You shake your head, “No, are they any good?” 
You’re still making no move to stand, Eddie towering over you as you tilt back to meet his gaze. The disbelief is morphing, ever changing, pulling in and out of his features like the sea against sand. Like the waves of his self-imposed ocean that taunts you. You only dig your toes into the sand, you only stand at a far enough distance to not get your feet wet yet. You’re not ready to dive in. You’re not brave enough yet. 
His chuckle this time isn’t in disbelief. 
“Yeah, yeah. They’re great. I can show you them later, if you just come to bed.” 
The game of teasing and begging is over, and you refuse to push your luck. He’s talking to you. Normally. You finally stand and shrug off that hand on your shoulder, finally trying to get your wits and not glance down at the waistband of his boxers. 
“Okay, lead the way,” you gesture before spinning your upper body around with your feet planted in place, a soft crack coming from your back. 
There’s no words exchanged in that brief walk to the bedroom; there’s nothing else to really say. The fight happened, Eddie locked you out, you’re both having to start from square one. The ocean still calls to you, and there’s nothing you can change about it. 
His room is the same as it was hours ago, when you’d locked yourself into it. A little messy, a little boyish, but comforting all the same. 
“A couple ground rules,” he finally breaks the silence. Oh, this oughta be good. “One, no more looking through my shit for…. Uh, magazines.”
“Trust me,” you hold up a hand in defeat, “Learned my lesson the first time. You can keep your gross Playboys.” 
His brows wrinkle in minute irritation, “Gross? They’re not gro- You know what? Whatever. Yeah. Stay away from my gross playboys. Second rule, I have enough pillows we can make a… wall, I guess?” 
You have to bite back your amusement, you have to remind yourself of the roar of an ocean. Maybe if you taste the salt on your lips again, you’ll remember that this is all temporary. 
“Sounds good to me,” you agree. 
“Obviously that means staying on your side of the bed. And it’s not a big bed, obviously, so-”
“What side of the bed do you prefer?” 
“Excuse me?” 
He’s dumbfounded despite the question not being a hard one. “The bed – which side do you prefer?” 
“I, uh, I-” he brings a hand up to the back of his neck, a nervous habit as he rubs his curls that are matted at the nape, “The left, I guess? Or I mean, if we’re looking down at it, it’d be the right, but…” he waves his hand in the general direction of the side he’s referring to, the one closest to the wall, “You know.” 
A nervous Eddie is a sight to behold. The fidgeting, the flush of his neck and cheeks, the stuttering sentences. He’s nervous about sharing a bed with you. 
“Perfect,” you offer a smile, although you don’t think it does much for him considering he’s looking down at the ground in bashfulness, “I prefer the right side. I just refer to them by left or right when you’re laying down, by the way.” 
You don’t have to add that tidbit – you don’t need to reassure him that your mind works in the same way as his in the slightest. But you do, and the red of his cheeks lightens. 
“Cool,” he murmurs.
“Cool,” you echo. 
The awkwardness can be afforded as the two of you straighten out the comforter, not needing to focus on shaking hands or fluttering chests as Eddie climbs in first and begins to rearrange his spare pillows as a barrier. His sweatpants slip down a bit lower as he does this, and you catch sight of the band of his boxers.
The band of his boxers pressing into the jut of his hips. The streak of alabaster, soft and unmarked unlike his arms, and the coarse patch of hair that interrupts the center of it all. 
“Have you ever considered getting hip tattoos?” you blurt out, and immediately, you both freeze. 
You really need to learn to think before you speak. 
“Uh… what?” Eddie chuckles nervously, presenting an opportunity to redeem yourself. 
He didn’t even have to catch you staring. You’d outed yourself.
And yet, you choose to double down, to take the embarrassment in stride as if it doesn’t phase you, “Hip tattoos. Have you ever thought about getting some? I think they’d be pretty sick.” 
Your self-destruction pays off when Eddie smiles up genuinely at you. Sugar coated sweetness, a bit of authentic amusement. 
“You’re right. They would be pretty sick.” 
He should have mocked you for staring at his hips. He should have taken the opportunity to embarrass you and run, but the tides are shifting between you two, and you keep taking two steps closer to his ocean. The sand only grows colder and colder the closer you get to the edge, and it has your mind reaming with the possibility of what it would feel like to recklessly dive in. 
“I’m sorry, I’m going to need you to say that again, this time into the microphone,” you make a fist, an invisible microphone in your grasp as you thrust it out towards Eddie. 
He laughs. He laughs, and its reverb travels through the caverns of your chest. Suddenly, you’re sipping a watered down Amaretto Sour and his breath smells of Jack & Coke, and the lowlights of the room have become treacherous bar lighting as you lean into his shoulder, sitting side by side on bar stools. 
The echoes still carry as he swats away your hand, eyes squinted with the mirth you’d be seeking out since he ‘woke’ you up, “Jesus Christ, you’re an idiot.” 
“Yeah, a funny idiot.” 
“Oh, now you’re just pushing it too far.” 
“Too far? I don’t think I’ve gone far enough.” 
Why don’t we ever hang out? Why don’t we ever banter like this when out with the others? 
It’s so easy, easy to continue to giggle as you turn out the bedroom light before crawling into bed with him, feeling his warmth radiating even through the pillows between the two of you. Pillows, oceans – they all have started to feel the same. 
Once the two of you have settled, you on your side and Eddie on his back, a nicer sort of silence blankets you. It’s almost as soft as his voice when he woke you, almost the same type of crushed velvet if you don’t reach out to it. But if you were to touch it, brush your fingertips over the material with intention and inhibition, you’d find the roughness. Roughness that mimics sand amongst an ocean’s waves, a roughness that says there’s more to be spoken about. 
“The bed’s nicer than the couch,” you speak out loud rhetorically, not necessarily to him, but to the coarseness. To the sand and to the fake velvet, “More comfortable.”
“I know,” he answers to fill the space. I know, meaning he’s slept on his couch. 
It makes sense. It’s his couch. But your mind runs rampant with the scenarios. Did he discover this through afternoon naps after hard shifts? Or maybe after one too many night outs that ended in collapsing face first into the cushions because he was too drunk to make it to his bedroom? 
You jump when he sits up suddenly, “Fuck.” 
“What’s your problem?” you twist from your position of your back facing him, squinting into the darkness.
“The photo.”
“What photo?”
“Photo evidence, you idiot! We have to send a photo to those fuckers.” 
You had nearly forgotten that this is what this is; your friends and a bet are the pushing force behind this all. It’s not fate, it’s not the moon bringing two tides  together. You didn’t happen upon his beach because you two decided to give this, whatever this was, a fighting chance. 
You sit up next to him, crinkling your nose, “My phone’s in the living room, I think.” 
“I can go get it.”
An offer of chivalry you didn’t even have to ask for. 
Same as him sharing the bed. Same as him paying for your meal when you forget your wallet, or catching you when you trip up steps outside a bar. You really wish the list would stop growing. 
He’s shuffling out of the bed, down the line of pillows and off the end of it, before you can even protest. You didn’t even tell him where the godforsaken phone might be besides that it’s in the living room. That doesn’t stop him. 
It feels like an eternity, but is probably no more than a full minute, before he’s returning back to the room. He’s looking down at the phone, your screen lit up and basking his face in the only light in the room. 
“What is it?” you can only assume the chat is messaging for a photo, by the scrunch of his brows and the small part of his lips. 
“Nothing.”
That was the first thing that made your stomach drop.
The second comes when he returns to the bed, fighting his way up into his original position, handing the phone over to you as you glance at the notifications. 
A notification from Steve. A private message, not sent in the groupchat. 
STEVE-O: i’m sorry, i really don’t know what happened that night. the others won’t tell me either so they’re kind of useless. whatever it was, i don’t think it was you, though, honey.
Honey. Mother fucking Steve Harrington, and his need to use nicknames. 
“All good?” Eddie asks, as if he didn’t just have access to this message, as if he doesn’t know what Steve’s said. You don’t know why the thought of Eddie seeing Steve’s careless nickname throws you over the edge. You just assume he’ll take it out of context, that he’ll spin it as a weapon against you. 
“Fine,” you curtly reply, opening your phone and ignoring the message, going straight to the group chat and opening your camera. Your heart is still racing in terrible inconvenience as you glance over your shoulder at him, “How do we wanna take it this time?” 
“I don’t know about you, but I personally just love to take it laying down-” 
“Are you trying to make a sexual innuendo right now? Because if so, stop. It’s terrible.” 
More giggles, more chuckles, more taunting waves of a daunting ocean that is scaring you less and less. Maybe the jump is worth it. Maybe the initial chill will break and show you warmth. Maybe it would never be cold to begin with. 
At least he’s teasing you, which is a good sign. You lay down in the same position as earlier, this time Eddie propping himself up to peek over the wall of pillows so his face is in the picture. 
It’s too dark to really see your faces very clearly. You can still make them out, to be fair, but it’s hard. You have to strain your eyes quite a bit to make out the mess of your hair and the indents of Eddie’s dimples.
Eddie’s dimples. His dimples. Oh God, he’s smiling.
“Turn on the flash,” he reaches over, invades your space with boy and spice and nostalgia to tap on the screen himself and do as he had just requested. 
“What was the point of telling me to do it, if you were just going to do it yourself,” you grumble, trying to yank the phone out of his reach. He only leans further, pressing into the boundary of pillows, his collarbone knocking against the back of your shoulder. 
Warmth. So, so much warmth. It occurs to you that it’s not just the smell of his cologne that feels like a long week’s homecoming; his touch and presence can manage to do the same, when he’s not being a pest of course. 
“Shut up and take the photo,” he bickers before giving up and settling back into his pose. He even adds to it, throwing up a peace sign with the hand not holding him up.
You can’t help but tease him for it, mimicking the motion with your own hand and failing at holding back your tittering. When you tap the button to take the photo, the screen flashes white and you both immediately groan before rubbing your eyes. 
“Fuck.”
“Wow, bright idea.” 
“Was that a pun?” Eddie stops mid eye rub, side-eyeing you, “Fuck off. That was a terrible pun.” 
“I never said my puns were good!” you try to defend yourself, blinking to bring relief to your scorned irises and focus on the photo of the two of you, “I said my jokes were good.”
“Puns are jokes.” 
You completely ignore him, and instead sigh deeply when you see the photo, “We need to retake it. No flash, this time. They can adjust brightness on their own time.” 
The photo is terrible, truly. The photo captures the moment somewhere between your enjoyment of copying Eddie and the pain the two of you had brought upon yourselves. Squinty eyes, coiled lips. Two peace signs of two drastically differently sized hands. 
Don’t you dare, you scorn your mind at that trail of thought, don’t even start that comparison.
“Why?” Eddie protests, once again beginning to lean over and take a closer look at your phone, chest brushing your shoulder again, “Oh, c’mon, it’s fine – just send it so we can sleep before they bother us again.” 
You just shake your head, already reopening the camera app and being sure to adjust the settings. No blinding this photo. 
“Say cheese, pretty boy.” 
It’s not until you’ve tapped to take the photo that you both realize what you’ve said. 
Pretty boy.
Eddie is leaning in still, just as he is in the photo you’ve taken, and both of you look far too happy to be sharing a bed. The words – the nickname, the compliment – are still formed on your lips in it. If the flash was on again, you’d see the blush of his reaction. 
Neither comment on it. You won’t lean into your embarrassment for a second time tonight, and Eddie isn’t in the business of teasing you cruelly anymore, it seems. 
You can hear him swallow hard before he asks, “Is that one good?” 
“Fine,” you squeak before clearing your throat, “Um, yeah, it’s good. I sent it.” 
“Okay, good.”
“Good.”
The awkwardness is stifling. Heavy and drowning and goddamn stifling. 
You toss your phone far too quickly onto his nightstand, wishing the bed would swallow you whole. 
If you two were friends, it would have been mindless teasing. The same as when Steve calls you honey, or Robin rambles about how hot you look on a night out. But you two aren’t friends.
You two aren’t friends because of some mysterious change that occurred in Eddie while you went to the bathroom. You haven’t forgotten the burning question, and the longer you two lay there, the more you let it consume you rather than regret. 
“Hey, Eddie? Can I ask you a question?”
He’s laying flat on his back as he answers you, hands nervously wringing on his stomach, “You just did, but sure.” 
It should be a good thing. He’s still teasing you, it’s still a good thing. But all your questions die in your throat. 
What happened when I went into the bathroom that first night?
Why did you turn so cold towards me?
 Was it my fault?
Why aren’t we friends? 
The last one doesn’t go down without a fight. It reverberates and battles you, it tries to pull you into the ocean head first. 
Why aren’t we friends? 
“Do you still drive a motorcycle?” 
That sure was a funny way of asking what you needed to. 
He’s quiet for a moment, clearly puzzled by your random question, but nevertheless he says, “Yeah. Why?”
“No reason.” 
You’re picturing him stalking away from you again, without so much as a goodbye, straddling the bike and tucking his head away into the motorcycle. The last glimpse you’d ever had of everything he could have been to you. It’s enough to make your eyes water, your bones shake, your toes curl into coarse sand until they bleed. 
The next time you hear his voice, he’s whispering your name. You don’t respond, and so he tries it again, saying it a bit louder this time. 
“I know you’re not asleep. No one can fall asleep that quickly.”
“I can,” you snap, still choking on his waves and personal mourning, a yearning you need to find the grave of once more to bury – for good this time. 
“Clearly, you can’t,” he shuffles, but you don’t check to see if he’s sitting up. (He’s not, he feels like his back is glued to the bed). His voice is back to crushed velvet and kindness, vulnerability and softness, a sort of home you can never return to, “I just wanted to say I’m sorry.” 
That piques your interest. You turn, laying on your back and looking at the same ceiling as him in that moment, “For what? Earlier in the kitchen? Or at the bar?” you feel his flinch, and are quick to add, “Because consider it water under the bridge, okay? You’re forgive-”
“I mean for everything. I’m sorry for… everything.” 
Everything. Ten letters, four syllables. It means a whole lot more than it should be capable of. 
“Everything?” your voice is hardly audible as you turn to look at him. He’s half hidden by the wall put between the two of you. But if you squint, if you adjusted the brightness, you wonder if you’d see his eyes shining with the same remorse yours burn with. You wonder if you’d see the dirt caked under his nails from also digging up graves he shouldn’t have tonight. 
“Everything.”
Ten letters, four syllables, one leap of faith. The ocean isn’t as cold as you’d thought it would be. 
BIRDIE is typing…
DINGUS: i swear to god rob. if you’re not about to tell me what the fuck i did that night, you better lock your phone and just go to bed. 
BIRDIE stops typing.
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zorobraun · 1 year ago
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sexual tension with ghost that leads to sex (but he’s not toxic anymore) part four
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at one lonely night, simon thought that he just needed a distraction to stop thinking about you all the fucking time. yet… “you’re so big and strong.” ghost almost frowns when he hears the woman he was about to fuck — so he can think it’s you instead — whispering on his ear. fucking hell, this lady sounds pathetic; even though she’s not mocking him at all. however, he’d much rather hear you saying those words in your usual mocking tone, than her saying them in a seductive one. “actually, i have a girlfriend. sorry.” he lies, smiling politely. if he had been honest, he would’ve said: “actually, you’re not y/n, so i physically can’t get hard, even though you’re pretty fuckable. sorry.”
(…)
“jesus christ, maybe we should get him a dog.” konig says to alejandro and soap while they stare at their lieutenant’s miserable and lonely figure. ghost is taking a deep breath as he feels the sun on his not so exposed skin. “bro had to reconnect with mother nature to try to get over y/n.” soap jokes, making they burst out laugh. “y’all are mean. malos!” alejandro punches their arms, laughing. meanwhile, ghost decides that it’s enough mother nature for today and walks back to the base, just to find the three of them holding back a laugh. “morning, lt.” they all say together, looking quite suspicious. “get the fuck outta’ my face, bastards.”
(…)
after a few days suffering to get over you, the day has finally arrived — soap’s birthday. ghost sighs as he enters the downtown bar, the overwhelming noise of people talking loudly mixed with music invading his ears. “finally! i thought you wouldn’t come.” soap punches ghost’s arm, hugging him tight. “drunk already?” ghost chuckles, taking a look around. “you know me, lt.” he smirks, taking a long sip of his long neck beer. “come on, we’re all over there.” soap adds, pointing to the corner of the bar, where the pool table is.
they all greet ghost with sincere smiles and hugs, one thing about lieutenant ghost is that he’s very loved by people, somehow. he grabs a beer as he joins the team’s conversation, sitting on the edge of the pool table. “lt, that girl is staring. like, for real. i think she wants you.” konig discretely points to a blonde woman, making all of the boys look at her simultaneously. “fucking idiots, y’all don’t know how to fudge.” konig rolls his eyes, they all laugh.
“if you fumble her, i swear to god…” soap stares at his best friend. ghost grins, holding back a laugh. “i might, not gonna lie. i’m not in the mood.” simon shrugs, making them mock him with annoying sounds. “right, she’s not y/n!” alejandro mocks him again and ghost chuckles. “i’ll fucking kill you when we leave this place.” ghost jokes, pulling his jacket up to show his glock. “alejandro didn’t lie, though. you were always in the mood with her.” soap adds, they all laugh again, except for ghost.
“what did y’all expect?” obviously they all stay silent, or else simon would kill them. “i was on my knees for her.” he chuckles, knowing damn well that he is obsessed with you still. “literally.” konig points out, making them hold back a laugh. ghost sighs defeatedly when he notices the sudden silence, all of their dread faces, staring behind him. of course you had to come. “h-hey, y/n!” soap smiles nervously, walking towards you. ghost swallows hard, standing up. “happy birthday, soap.” you smile wholeheartedly, hugging him. “i bought you something, hope you like it.” you stroke his arm slightly, he kisses your cheek as he thanks you.
ghost turns his back to face you and the world stops. his heart skips a beat when you look back at him, you look so beautiful in this black short silk dress. you think he looks very handsome in all black too, but you’d rather die than say it out loud. they all clear their throat as they start talking to each other, pretending to not care about you and ghost at all.
“now what are you even doing here?” you finally say with some sort of disgust in your words. ghost is in shock with your bratty attitude, coming closer to you. “come again?” he frowns, your gaze on him suddenly getting on his nerves. “soap said you wouldn’t be able to make it, that’s why i’m here, obviously.” you roll your eyes, trying to ignore his perfume messing up all of your senses.
“well, sweetheart, soap fucking lied. now fix your attitude, we’re not together anymore.” he says in his usual bossy tone and you just hate it so much. you chuckle dryly, stepping in closer, so he can hear you very clearly. “have we ever been together, simon? i just remember being your sex toy, that’s all.” you force a smile, already getting mad at his stupid face. “you enjoyed every second of it, though. if you weren’t such a whiny bitch, i would’ve made us official.” he says straight to your face, just a few inches away from yours, actually.
you swallow hard, as if you were preparing yourself for something you’ve been wanting to do for a while now. you slap him in the face with such a force, that your palm stings. your breathing grows a bit faster, a part of you afraid of what he’s going to do about it. half of the people around you is staring at you and ghost, with curious but shocked eyes. suddenly, all you hear is the loud music; ‘closer’, by nine inch nails. you hold your breath for a while. simon has this hatred painted all over his face as everybody’s attention goes somewhere else, thank god.
ghost thinks you’re very lucky to be you and above all, a woman. he would never hurt a woman, specially you, of course. but oh god, he’s mad. he’s furious. he just wants to make you suffer so bad, he wants to absolutely ruin your entire life, make you feel humiliated in front of this entire bar, just like he’s feeling right now. he grabs your arm in a tight grip as his lips come closer to your ear. “you’ll fucking regret that.” his tone sounds deeper now that he’s seeing red.
before you could answer, simon’s grip obliges you to keep up with his wide steps. you’re following him like a puppy and it makes you try to get away from him, but he’s way stronger. and besides, you don’t really want to leave him. “hey you, let her go!” a random guy yells at simon, placing a hand on his chest. you frown, as if you’re telling the guy that he just made a huge mistake. “get the hell outta’ my face before i break your fucking nose.” simon says in a very annoyed tone, his grip on you never leaving.
“do it, asshole. you don’t have the b…” the poor guy suddenly falls onto the ground, his hand pressing against his bleeding nose. you widen your eyes, holding simon’s arm. for a moment, he realizes how much he missed your gentle hands on him. he doesn’t waste any more time as you both walk towards the exit. “u-um, i’m sorry, okay?” you mutter nervously as you both leave the bar. ghost is walking the two of you to his car, you notice.
“i wasn’t thinking straight.” you add when he pushes you against his car’s closed door. he’s looking into your eyes a bit differently than before; like his hatred just turned into something more powerful. simon grabs the sides of your neck so hard that you could almost choke. you start praying to god, maybe this is the day you’ll meet him in heaven. well, you’re indeed going to heaven tonight. just not to meet jesus. simon pulls you close by the grip on your neck, kissing you slowly. oh, so this is heaven…
the way he shoves his tongue in your mouth like he’s claiming you for the thousandth time makes you moan quietly against him. he swallows that one single sound of yours as if it was his favorite drink. you both hold back the urge to say that you’ve missed each other so bad as he eagerly bites your bottom lip. you breathe out as your hand goes to the small of his back, pulling his body closer to yours. he almost groans when he feels your tiny figure trying to get some friction against him.
“do you ever… think straight, when i’m around?” he finally says something as he stops kissing you, out of breath. your cheeks get red when you realize you’re already melting to the way his voice sounded firm, but calm and flirty at the same time. that burning hate of his seems to fade away when you chuckle. “not really.” he holds back a smile.
“as much as i want to fuck some decency in you…” he stares at your lips for a second. you press your thighs together. “i won’t do that.” he grabs your jaw, his face too close for your comfort. “‘cause i know this was your plan all along.” he places a suggestive kiss under your ear. “besides…” he pauses. his breathing on your sensitive area making you shiver. “i’m over you.” simon completes, knowing damn well that this statement will absolutely destroy you in so many ways. so you almost throw up when you notice that he sounds so sure of what he just said. little do you know, he’s a proud liar.
“no, you’re not.” you think out loud, wanting to punch yourself for sounding so desperate, so dependent of him, of his stupid affection for you. you just can’t bear the tought of him moving on so easily when you’re right where he left you. suddenly, you feel the urge to cry. you grab the hand that was on your face, placing it above your beating heart. “tell me you don’t feel a single thing for me and i swear to god, i’ll leave for good. you’ll never hear from me again.” you say with watery eyes staring into his. simon’s breathing grows erratic, his throat is so dry that he thinks you’ll be the death of him. he wasn’t expecting this kind of reaction from you, honestly. maybe he wasn’t the only one that still didn’t move on.
“you let your fear of love win again and you’ll fucking lose me, simon.” you’re literally tearing up now, his hand might be shaking against you. “this is the last time i’m fighting for you, do you understand? i’m done fighting alone, when you don’t even move a single finger for me.” your heart misses a beat when you realize you can’t even get a reaction from him. “i want you to fucking say something, do something!” you let go of his hand as you hit his chest, pushing him away. simon stays silent and you close your eyes, tears running down your face as you take a defeated breath.
you look at him. “goodbye, simon.” you’re saying these words so many times that it’s becoming your tagline. you lick your lips and sigh, walking away. he’s paralyzed as his heart keeps screaming don’t let her go, don’t let her go, don’t let her go. he feels like having a panic attack when he tries to breathe deeply, but he can only breathe shallowly. don’t be a pussy, you’re embarassing. your family, they were never a good example of love. you can let it go, you can let them go. what you can’t let go, is her. do something. do something. do something.
simon swallows hard as your absence pulls him out of his messy thoughts. he takes a look around, but you’re already far away. it doesn’t matter, he’d follow you through hell. his steps are wide and fast as he doesn’t lose track of you. he shoves some people away on the sidewalk. he doesn’t care. then you feel it — his hand on your wrist. you stop walking, already knowing that he’ll say some nonsense shit to make you feel less worse, just like the other night. you turn your back to look at him with annoyed eyes. he takes a deep breath.
“y/n, i once said to soap that you’re too good for me… but i was wrong. it turns out that you’re the best part of me.” simon’s hands go to the back of your neck, looking into your bright eyes. “i realized that too late, when i lost you.” he pauses, licking his lips nervously. “i can’t lose you again, i don’t want to. all i want is you, by my side.” you swallow hard. “i’m sorry, love, for being so complicated. i’m a fucking prick but… i’ll try to be a better man, from now on.” his fingers caress your cheeks.
“i love you. i love you too fucking much. i wouldn’t even want to fall in love if the person i fell in love with wasn’t you.” he chuckles sweetly when he notices your shocked face. “i’m sincerely in love with you and it pisses me off, ‘cause i didn’t know i was able to love someone this much. so stay with me. stay with me today, tomorrow, and the day after that. the other ones too.” simon gives you sweet little kisses all over your face, making the both of you chuckle. “you’re my entire heart, dumbass.” he grins wholeheartedly, and…
you kiss him hard. god, you want to fucking kill him, then bring him back to life.
well, you kind of did.
(…)
“how’s the water temp?” simon looks at your flushed face as you let the water run down your body. “warm enough.” you smile, pulling him close so he can get under the shower with you. he chuckles, kissing your wet forehead. you try to push him away playfully when you notice his gaze on your body — he doesn’t even move. “stop looking at me like that!” you complain, laughing. “you do realize that i’ve already seen your entire body like, a hundred times, right?” he raises an eyebrow mockingly, laughing at your unnecessary shyness.
“i’m not complaining, though.” he smirks, caressing your arm. “you’re the most beautiful thing i’ve ever laid my eyes on.” you hold back a smile, rolling your eyes. you give him a quick little kiss, holding onto his forearm, since he’s too tall for you. “aw, thanks. it’s a shame i can’t say the same for you.” you joke, he closes his eyes as he laughs. “you’re so dumb, i swear to god…” simon cups your face so he can kiss you again.
“okay, okay.” you pull away, lips still close to his. “i think you’re very handsome, no joke this time.” you smile, looking into his eyes. “and i might love your forearm’s tattoo more than i love you.” you joke, caressing the area you just mentioned as you stare at his toned forearm. your man is just so attractive. he raises an eyebrow. you both chuckle. “just say you ‘wanna fuck, dickhead.” simon teases, you slap his arm.
“i don’t, dumbass.” you roll your eyes playfully, smiling too. he’s looking at you as if he knows you’re lying, but you both choose to ignore that. “help me wash my hair, i’m done with you.” he laughs, grabbing the shampoo. you close your eyes when you feel his fingers rubbing your scalp gently. your relaxed sigh makes him hug you from behind, foam getting all over your stomach. “sleeping on me now, love?” he teases with a kiss on your cheek. you’re really feeling sleepy as his face goes to the crook of your neck, feeling your soft skin against his body.
“i like having you close to me.” you mumble, eyes still closed. simon smiles half heartedly, holding you tighter. you’re both too warm to the touch. he sighs lazily as he pulls away, letting you wash the shampoo out. simon takes a deep lovesick breath while watching you do your thing. he sighs, touching his face — your natural beauty makes him ask himself when did he get so lucky. the way the water runs down your wet soft skin, your perfectly balanced body proportions… you’ve got him on his knees.
“‘wanna know a secret?” simons smirks. you chuckle, nodding. “i’m really happy that i’ll get to sleep next to you for the first time, in my own bed, at my own house. it’s something i’ve been… dreaming about for a while now.” you pout as he caresses your arm, chuckling at your cute reaction. you love the fact that the two of you aren’t at the base tonight, making the intimacy much better. “i can’t wait to cuddle with my beautiful, breathtaking, sexy girl and wake up next to her.” simon says playfully, looking at you with those eyes. you raise an eyebrow, narrowing your eyes at him. “you’ll let me fuck you, right, baby?” he jokes and you both laugh out loud. he pulls you into a playful tight hug.
“i already told you.” you roll your eyes playfully as you push him slightly away. “we’re not fucking tonight. i need to know if you really love me for me and not for the way i suck your dick.” you mock at him, making him laugh too loud again, in disbelief. “you got me there, sweetheart.” he clicks his tongue. “i do love the way you suck me, that’s why i fell for you in the first place.” he mocks back with a grin, lying. he fell for you because your vulnerability picked his soul up from a very dark place.
“you’re insufferable, simon.” you chuckle as you kiss him, and…
you let simon riley fuck you in the shower.
(…)
when the two of you finally lay down on his bed, you hear simon’s heavy but relieved sigh. you smile half heartedly as you both look at each other. “i can’t believe i had to wait for so long to sleep next to you.” you mock at him, making him roll his eyes as he laughs; the fact that he came off as the one who played hard to get due to his trauma is embarassing. “don’t even fucking start.” he hugs you, giving messy kisses all over you as a way to shut you up. you’re both laughing like idiots as you feel his heavy body almost suffocating you.
“g-get away from me!” you chuckle, making him chuckle too as he pulls slightly away from you. “you’ll see that it was worth the wait.” he jokes, kissing your forehead. “oh, i know.” you smirk as your face goes to the crook of his neck, making yourself comfortable. you hug him as you put one leg around his. simon chuckles, pulling you even closer as his hand gently strokes the small of your back. your breathing is too calm now, maybe you’re already asleep.
“wake up, sleepyhead.” he says playfully, hugging you tight before pulling away from you. you sigh impatiently as you open your eyes. before you could punch him in the face, he starts. “i need to make us official.” you raise an eyebrow, holding back a smile. “is that so?” you chuckle, kissing him. you sit on the bed as he caresses your thigh, still laying next to you. “i’ve never been that much of a romantic, so this will have to do, i’m sorry, love.” you both chuckle as you nod. “i’d rather marry you already but let’s take it one step at a time.” he smirks, making you blush.
“i wanna’ do it right this time. i no longer can imagine myself without you, so…” simon clears his throat, frowning. you can see that he’s struggling, so you kiss him quickly. “yes, i’ll be your girlfriend, simon.” you get it over with, making him let out a relieved laugh. “thank you so much, gorgeous. i just felt weird to ask you that, ‘cause i feel like we’ve been dating since the night you knocked at my door.” he chuckles, you obviously agree with that. “true, i remember being loyal to you even though we were just fucking around.” you point out, making you both laugh at the statement.
“i was loyal too, you know? my cock was very loyal to you as well, it wouldn’t even get hard with anyone else.” he mocks with a loud laugh, getting embarrassed with the memories. you slap his arm. “babe, i’m not joking.” simon adds, now you laugh out loud. “you’re disgusting, i can’t believe i accepted you as my boyfriend.” you joke, laying your body on top of him. he hugs your waist with a playful grin on his lips. “fuck, i miss when you actually had some sort of respect for me.” he gives your ass a slap, making you chuckle against him.
“you know i love you.” you look at him with a playful smirk. his lovesick eyes, his caring smile. oh, you’re really in love. you both stay still and silent for a moment, just feeling each other’s warmth. “i almost forgot.” he breaks the silence as you frown, growing curious. he stretches his arm under the bed, making you even more confused. simon sits on the bed with you on his lap. “i bought you flowers.” you open your mouth in both surprise and excitement. did simon-heartless-riley bought you flowers? “no, you didn’t. when did you buy them? i was with you the whole time!” you chuckle in disbelief before smiling like a teenager in love.
“i bought ‘em a few minutes before heading to soap’s party, as a promise to myself.” he explains, caressing your thigh with his free hand. “a promise to yourself?” you ask, smiling curiously. “yeah, love. a promise to myself that…” he pauses as his hand finally appears again, this time with a beautiful bouquet of mixed flowers. you pout softly as you caress his arm. “…that i would get the girl.” simon stares into your bright eyes. your reaction makes him chuckle quietly before kissing you in a very tender and meaningful way.
he certainly got the girl.
finally.
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tags: @nijiru @ahleeyuh
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toomuchracket · 5 months ago
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mads,,, I feel like this is going to be an easy answer but how does matty (feel free to pick the most fitting au from your genius brain) feel about a thick-thigh girly?? as a thick-thigh owner (partially gym-related, but mostly just good old squish) who is insecure about that particular element of me, and at some point wants to tattoo my thighs so I can think more positive things about them, i’d love to know how matty might show some love for a soft squishy girly 😩
all of my matties are obsessed with thick thighs but most specifically office nerd, oh my GOD that sweet boy cannot cope with your legs. the first time he saw you was in an a-line miniskirt, actually, with sheer black tights, and as soon as he saw your thighs in that outfit he was internally like "oh. she's going to prove a problem for me being professional" - and that was BEFORE he saw your face, at which point it was game over for matthew lmao. and the first time you stayed over at his, and he loaned you a t shirt and a pair of boxer shorts to wear in bed? jesus h fucking christ alive; thank god you like him clinging to you, because he could NOT keep his hands off your thighs whatsoever. he still can't, actually - any chance he gets to touch or rub or squeeze them, he takes, and even non-sexually he loves kissing the soft skin and tracing little patterns and resting his head on them while he looks up at you lovingly (and, obviously, any chance to be between them in the sexual sense, he SEIZES). he would def find a thigh tat sexy as fuck, but he loves them and you more than enough as is; he tells you as much all the time, constantly reminding you how beautiful you are and how much he loves your body and how sexy he finds you. yeah. he loves thick thighs, that one <3
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apiratefellinlovewithastar · 11 months ago
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https://www.tumblr.com/darlingjunebug/728466035752271872?source=share
it's skull, skull is the third party who gets involved bc he's the only who has the emotional intelligence to notice the problem and the lack of self preservation to put himself in the line of fire
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There are some pros and cons to being a civilian suddenly thrust into not only the cursed mafia world, but also the cursed mafia world.
Pros: he gets paid to do what he loves—to play out his stunts in a setting where he doesn’t have to hold back so as to not to raise civilian suspicions about his condition, while also getting all of the acclaim when his subordinates genuinely shower him with it.
(Was it a mindfuck when some clown just showed up in his living room trying to reclute him? Yes. Is it dangerous? Yes. But if there’s anything the great Skull-sama loves, it’s a good challenge!)
Cons: once in a while he has to spend time in the vicinity of some less-than-desirable individuals, who consider him—him!—to be the less-than-desirable individual. The nerve!
(He’s not factoring Kawahira’s little misadventure, specifically, into this; getting turned into a toddler isn’t any weirder than being able to regenerate his body and coming back to life in his books.
Now that they’re out of the woods and he can laugh about it, he can begrudgingly admit—in the safety of his mind—that Checker Face did it for a noble cause, despite going about it in a not-so-hot fashion. If Skull were a millennia old being, he would play Russian roulette with some douchebags and give them body dysmorphia just for shits and giggles.
Skull will, however, complain about the acquaintances it left him with, as much as he wants, for as long as they’re assholes—which is shaping up to be for a very, very long time.)
The delightful but ultimately exasperating shit show that are one Sawada Tsunayoshi and Reborn-senpai does not fall into either of those categories, but in a secret, third, second-option-adjacent thing: idiots in love who, despite being more in sync with each other’s emotions than anyone could ever wish to be with their partner’s, couldn’t be more out of touch with their feelings if they tried. (And Skull has seen some paradoxes in his time, okay?)
All of this is relevant because, ultimately, despairingly, he’s gonna have to intervene. Jesus fucking Christ.
None of Tsuna’s little Elements, let alone any of Skull’s former colleagues—or anyone else who could, for that matter—is gonna do jack shit about it. They’re all either too emotionally constipated themselves, too scared of Reborn to dare going against him, or too willing to let them ‘go at their own pace’ (as if that will ever lead anywhere!).
So. It all falls into his hands to do something about it.
Does Skull win anything by meddling? Not in the slightest. On the contrary—
“I do not get paid enough for this shit,” Skull groans. “I do not get paid at all for this shit.”
If anything, he’s risking death by Reborn-senpai!
But he owes it to Tsuna, because despite being obviously influenced by Reborn in more ways than anyone would like, he has never, not even once, been unkind to Skull. Even before the whole Representative Battles happened—and that’s a whole other debt he needs to repay.
Unlike anybody else who has ever interacted with both Skull and Reborn, Tsuna has never once lacked basic human decency. (Skull wishes he had lacked basic human decency; he wouldn’t feel so morally obligated to protect the kid’s heart then.)
Enma pats his back in comfort when Skull hides his face in the other’s shoulder. Earnestly, he says, “I think you’re doing something truly honorable, senpai,” because he’s seen those two and knows what Skull has to deal with; more so than Skull, actually, because while Skull can just fuck-off whenever they get unbearable, Enma lives here and still has to interact with them on a daily basis.
What the fuck.
Skull raises his head long enough to look at him. “How do you deal with it, Enma-kun?”
Like the true child soldier he is—and he’s not gonna open that can of worms at the moment; Jesus, why did he even have to think about it?! One emotional crisis at a time, please!—Enma stares off into space before solemnly saying, “I grew up with Adel and Julie,” like that answers anything.
It kinda does, funnily enough.
“Ne, ne, Enma-kun,” Skull wheedles, getting an idea.
But Enma shakes his head, smiling apologetically before he can even say anything else. “I can’t help you with this,” he says, soothing the sting of his betrayal by running gentle fingers through Skull’s nape. “I grew up with Adel and Julie,” he reiterates meaningfully.
It takes Skull a moment.
“That bitch,” he says with an offended gasp. “She told you not to get involved, didn’t she?!”
Enma tugs gently at a lock in reproach. “Be nice to my sister.”
Skull pouts. Enma’s eyes soften. The fond amusement in his expression makes Skull’s stomach flutter.
(Maybe he has indigestion or something? He’ll have to pick up some Otha’s Isan on his way back.)
“If it makes you feel better, I will cheer you on every step of the way, okay? So hang in there, senpai.”
That does make him feel better.
If nothing else, Skull will at least have a cute little kouhai to come back to and be comforted by when this inevitably blows up on his face.
“Well,” Skull says, revisiting his earlier thoughts. He leans into Enma’s touch, feeling rejuvenated. “If there’s anything the great Skull-sama loves, it’s a good challenge!”
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gabessquishytum · 2 years ago
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JESUS H CHRIST that last warprize hob ask. MY GOD I am going feral. That is the stuff, that is my jam okay, that's what I'm talking about. Dream being a sadistic bastard of a king, YES PLEASE.
I love imagining Hob in tears and begging, this is uncharted territory for him. He's Hob Gadling, roguish charming mercenary for hire, who's always been able to talk himself out of trouble. He's always been the one to take care of his partners, but now. Now, he's been reduced to a plaything, dressed in skimpy fabrics, decorated with piercings designed to enhance his sensitivity to a 100, body changed to be better suited for pleasure, his and that of his king.
Oh how he struggled against his bonds at first, all the escape attempts when he managed to recover his mental faculties enough to be aware of his situation. The punishments he wrought were absolutely brutal, he always ended up a pleading, bleeding mess begging for forgiveness on all fours.
I'm drooling at the thought of a permanent change, like the piercings (body part of your choice) OR maybe a womb tattoo. OH my god, let me bring that up real quick. Maybe the aphrodisiac candies aren't enough to keep Hob in line anymore, and so Dream needed to find a way to keep him docile, on a more permanent basis. Muwahahahahaahha
Cue Hob in restraints, gagged and bound to a table. And he's bawling his eyes out as he realized what's happening, crying out no no no please no please I'll do anything, though it is muffled. And Dream is there obviously, getting off at the sight of Hob's big pleading brown eyes, but he needs to focus on the ritual now. And once it's all over, he'll make sure to kiss all of Hob's tears away, as an apology. And who knows, perhaps a pregnancy or two might distract Hob for the foreseeable future.
I'm sorry, that last line was an excuse for Dream to put Hob in a mating press position. I'm so sorry.
I pray and hope someone writes the full fic. As always, I'd love to hear your thoughts on this.
-Love Yan Anon <3
Ajajdjfjggk here's a link to that other sadistic bastard dream ask <3
Magic womb tattoo tho? Magic womb tattoo <33
Hob is on his back, legs spread, and Dream is looming over him like... Well, like a nightmare. Hob has his mouth full of a leather gag and he's writhing, biting, straining against the cuffs keeping him down. When Dream starts working on him, it's agony. The magic seeps into his blood and it hurts so much... but Dream is whispering to him sweetly, telling him how brave he is and how it's all going to be OK. Hob is so strong, he's going to survive and thrive and be Dream’s good little pet. Doesn't he want to be good? He knows how hard it is for Hob to behave, but Dream’s going to make it so much easier for him. He'll be so much happier when he's calm and behaving properly.
The tattoo is of course visible for everyone to see on the outside. It curls around Hob’s lower belly, reaching down between his legs. He's not allowed to wear anything that covers up the tattoo now, so it's constantly on show. Under the skin, there's a lovely womb ready and waiting to take the king’s seed.
Hob wants to rebel, of course. His personality hasn't changed. But his blood is full of magic now, and it compels him to be good. There are moments when he misbehaves - Dream is always rather amused by his pets bad behaviour, and he enjoys the opportunity to spank Hob’s arse raw - but mostly, Hob is... docile. Sweet. Devastatingly horny, too, constantly crawling between Dream’s legs and mewling sweetly to be fucked.
Dream has a mating bench specially made for his pet, as a gift for how well he did with the ritual. Hob is gently strapped into place on the rich, comfortable leather. His legs spread open, his blood pounding through his veins with the knowledge that he’s going to be fucked and bred. He knows that he won't be allowed up again until Dream is convinced that he's pregnant - he's in for the long haul.
A week ago, the idea of his belly swelling with the king’s child would make him shudder. Now... he gazes down at the ink on his skin that claims him as Dream’s possession, his object, his thing. And to his horror and mild disgust, he finds himself looking forward to the future.
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themistymountainscold · 1 year ago
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ok i just watched all of inside man today and i need to fucking talk about it so.
yeah if you are interested it's under the cut. major spoiler warning obviously
after note: i say fuck a lot. i think it's a problem
first of all.
WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK. WHY WAS THIS A PROBLEM IN THE FIRST PLACE JESUS CHRIST.
edgar needed help and that should never have been the vicar's duty. his mother is a bitch. but harry should have spoke up and got him help too. and edgar is- i don't even know what to say actually. i know he's mentally fucked up. but literal c h i l d- like just. i got sick when janice said what it was.
ALSO WHY WOULD EDGAR TRUST HIS FUCKING VICAR TO HOLD ONTO IT?? BITCH JUST THROW IT AWAY FUCKING HELL. HE WAS GENUINELY GOING TO GET IT BACK LATER IF HARRY HADN'T CONFRONTED HIM.
and just fucking hell the way they noth handled that conversation? jesus harry should have just told janice it was edgar's. and janice should have just fucking stopped and listened.
and how it escalated to her falling down the cellar steps??? and then harry just locking it???
i will admit it was really funny when the next ep started and mary already knew. like if the story wasn't so fucked they are such a healthy and sweet couple lmao.
but you can really see how much they love each other. even though they are talking about potentially killing a women so their son doesn't get labeled as a pedo.
i was almost expecting harry to just, honestly kill edgar in the church. i wasn't expecting at all for him to fucking ask edgar to download it all onto his laptop.
i don't understand why he wanted to take the fall. the first thing harry should have done was go to the police. but ig when a women is locked in your cellar cause she though it was your sons porn well...
the police interrogation after edgar's death was excruciating. the detective annoyed me so much. literally why does no one listen. but now i think about it, the note really left a bad idea. "the vicar is protecting a pedo" god shit mate.
also janice is really smart. but i am surprised it fooled harry. I mean he was extremely stressed. so he definatly wasn't thinking clearly. but god i was so glad when mary saw through it.
omfg then when ben got trapped in the basement, i was going to scream. and janice was really annoying me too, i know she was just trying to live but omg.
the part that shocked me the most was the death of mary. i jumped so hard. literally was in shock i was not ready. then like 2 seconds later ben is beating janice with a hammer.
but i also couldn't take mary seriously with the whooshing noises.
and harry knowing absolutely nothing as he waits for janice to die of carbon minoxide poisoning.
i also love how the side story of a murderer who decaptiated his own wife was the funny and light-hearted side.
i actually loved the show. despite how stressed it made me. i don't feel disatifyed, and even though it could have all been avoided i enjoyed the plot. i honestly had no idea what could escalate to such a point. but wow.
solid 8/10
i wanna fuck a priest - fleabag or whatever
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johnbronze · 2 years ago
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ok for real I know they were limited in their options for explaining Stiles’ actions because DOB didnt come back but like SERIOUSLY. I have so many questions and complaints and not even all of them are Stydia related….. spoilers obviously
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Uhhh I can’t figure out how to add a read more on mobile sorry folks hopefully this is a good enough buffer !!!!!
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Did…. Did anyone bother to tell Stiles that Allison is alive?  are we meant to believe that nobody did?? or what’s worse, that he was told and he just didn’t come to Beacon Hills or call or anything?
On that note, are we actually supposed to believe — and I am not a Sterek girlie by any means, love and light to y’all but it’s just not my cup of tea — that Derek fucking DIED and there was a whole ass memorial service that Stiles just didn’t bother to show up to???? HELLO????
I mean it’s also nearing levels of ‘spn finale Dean Winchester ending’ stupid that Derek died in the first place, given that his whooooole character arc (by my book, anyway) is springing from the place of his trauma, and the way that he has blamed himself, struggled with guilt and loneliness and has been atoning for all of the pain of what he perceives to be personal failures the ENTIRE TIME, never letting himself get too close to people, never asking for help, and instead sacrificing for and nurturing Scott as the ideal alpha that he feels he couldn’t be… I don’t know. It just feels like a needless sacrifice to me, like there are so many ways that you can restrain someone and prevent them from moving from the place where you need to. Oh I don’t know burn them alive ?maybe? Which don’t involve sacrificing yourself and burning alive yourself, right in front of your son and the rest of your loved ones. I know again there are production factors at play, maybe it’s likely that they knew damn well Tyler H wouldn’t or couldn’t come back for another movie so they decided to kill off his character?? but suffice to say I was not happy with that at all (and not in the way I think it was INTENDED to upset me.)
Anyway, I know that Stiles needed to be absent because Dylan O’Brien was not a part of this movie, but if I’m being honest, I kind of would rather that Stiles had died ! Obviously I love Stiles’s character and it’s not that I want him dead at all!! it’s just. if they were going to fully send it, and they know he’s not coming back, and they knew that they were going to make up this premonition dream to break up Stydia and (poorly) explain his absence, then it would’ve done a lot better to make that separation as permanent as in life and death. The Stiles we know would never want to be separated from the people he loves as much as he has been now because of all of the external, real life factors. In fact, the season arc with the ghost riders proved to us just how far Stiles can and would go to be present! It was aaaactually a whole thing ! So, if I’m being honest… (1) the way that he and Lydia parted, (2) the way that he isn’t present or even mentioned in the light of his loved ones dying/being resurrected, and (3) again the fact that he wasn’t even at Derek’s memorial … it all feels like a silent character assassination to me. It feels like the mentioning of “Stiles” in this new canon contains less essence of Stiles than it would’ve if he had died. I know it’s easy to have a hater moment and make criticisms and piss and moan about how I would’ve done it better, and I know it’s not always as easy as it sounds… but JESUS CHRIST
Also congrats to the sterek girlies on your own personal y yo a ti moment……that jeep shit was CRAZY
#this is only like an iceberg tip of the things I have to say about this movie#like there’s a clear estrangement between some of the main characters that honestly..stiles feared! we know he did#and we know how hard he fought to hold onto everyone#like he was the glue between them and it would’ve been so sad to see that confirmed. he really WAS the glue#seriously. stiles dies. they all fall apart into little groups and fragments pieces of my HEART!!!! I would’ve bawled.#we could’ve had a closed casket funeral flashback! Scott tries to take Malia’s hand and she pulls away. boom Scali breakup explained!#*​scalia (obvi)#and I feel it would’ve been more evocative emotionally to see Lydia grapple with guilt#that stiles died (in her mind at least) because she was too selfish to heed her power’s warning and keep away from him#it would’ve made the moments where Eli is SOOO similar to stiles HURT more for us as an audience AND to the characters who would see it too#like. raise the stakes! heighten Derek’s (and all of their) fierce protectiveness for this baby !!#make us ACHE thinking about the cycle of it all. how this kid is Scott but he’s also stiles and he’s (literally) a little bit of Derek and—#also this is another thing but I’m also pissed that Liam and Mason had like ZERO interactions lmfao theyre fucking besties ??? or#if they’re not anymore then you should TELL US THAT!!!#I wanna know why Scalia broke up and why she’s fucking Parrish FR#for REALLLL it’s so left field and don’t get me started on what they did to her character and how it highlights Stiles’ absence further#also I miss Theo. to ME he’s under the Hale’s wings. to ME he’s a mechanic and an artist and him and Liam are boyfriends. haters stay mad#TAKES A DEEP BREATH.#okay I think I’m done for now#I can’t figure out how to add a read more on mobile so I hope tagging for spoilers will be good enough (!)#teen wolf#teen wolf movie#teen wolf movie spoilers#teen wolf spoilers#tw#…. I mentioned Dean so.#supernatural finale#supernatural spoilers#alright. bases covered?#long post
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icarusredwings · 3 months ago
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"Hi! I'm looking for a Carl Boothe- Oooohh so thats why you called him Boot!"
"Yeah. That and the fact he only ever had one."
The receptionist tilted her head. "Carl...? OH! You mean Carla!" She says, smiling. "Oh im so glad! It's not often she has visitors."
Logan tilts his head, confused. ".. I thought his sister's name was sophia.."
Wade is confused, too, because he could have sworn that he was right. Everything Logan told him matched up. How could he be wrong?
"Carla! You have visitors!" She says, smiling as they come in to see a woman half dozed off in a rocking chair. "Miss Carla?" She puts a hand on the old woman's hand as she jumps, grunting. "What!?-"
For a second, everything is quiet. The older woman rubs her eyes and blinks. "Oh great the ghosts are back.." she muttered, waving a hand towards Logan as if its too painful to look at.
"... Boot? Haven't seen you in a while." He says, stepping forward with a dorky smile, understanding that Carl was now CarlA. Honestly, it was lazy, but...Carla fit her. And he couldn't ever forget that face. Wrinkles and all.
The woman snaps her head around, Her mouth dropping as she begins to tear up. "Howy?"
"H-howley but yes. That's me."
Watching Logan pull up a chair and hold her hand was enough for the receptionist to leave them alone.
Wade is left feeling a bit left out, pitiful, regretful, pure joy, and a bit jealous. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to see how gently he held her hand. How his thumb rubs over her knuckles... He thought that was their thing.
Though he sits and waits in silence, staring, watching them as the voices in his head are enough to keep him much company. Voices of worry and stress this was until he was praised.
"Yeah! Wade found you in this place. He-... erm.. We.. didn't know that your name is Carla now so it was quite difficult." He tells her as she smiles. "Really? And how'd you find me? Hiding that big brain of yours under a hood is simply terrible, darling."
He pauses and is like "Oh you have no clue what you're saying right now. Its so ugly up there."
Carla looks to Logan and Logan suddenly starts sweating as she glares at wade "Wade, shut the fuck up. What did I tell you about saying that about yourself?"
And suddenly, Wade feels completely different, scooting closer and now kicks his feet as he's part of the conversation. Logan proves time and time again that his voices are liars. No, Logan wasn't leaving him for a 83 year old trans woman who came out in her early 40s.
In fact, the amount of teasing she does to logan and how many stories she tells Wade about him from like 50 years ago makes him feel as if he has two moms now. As if he was meeting his mother in law and she showing him pictures of him in the tub except its stories of tripping Logan with her prosthetic and accidentally shooting Logan in the leg because they were drunk. How she's "never seen logan laugh like that before," which gives Wade an extreme amount of confidence.
They eventually move to somewhere with two bedrooms (hurray! It's literally the same building just down the hall instead) and move Boot in too.
"Al! We got you a buddy! Shes super disabled just like you, old and has a dick!-"
"Jesus christ Wade why cant you introduce anyone normally? Althea, This is Carla. Carla, this is Althea."
She sticks an arm out and Al obviously doesn't take it. "You have something against amputees or what?"
"Bitch im blind. Wade! You didn't tell her that!?"
"Are you serious? Winston! Didn't your mother teach you any manners!?"
It's now that Wade realizes he fucked up, because now there is TWO crotchety grandmas to yell at him. Having his middle name yelled also made him flinch and look guilty.
"Im sorry!" He whines. "And.. No...?"
"Well, I might just have to. Althea, darlin' mind showing me around?"
"Fine but dont think you're getting the tv after 8. Steve harvey is on."
"Mh mh mmh. Love me that harvey." She mutters and Wade looks at Logan to see him smiling, arms crossed like a parent watching his kid flirt.
Wade gasps. "YOU KNEW THEYD FU-"
Only for him to slap a hand over his mouth. "Shhh! Let'em be."
Let's just say, Al is less lonely from now on with the boys gone, and Puppins gets new shoes to chew on.
Thinking about them watching a 'Nam documentary and Wade keeps pointing out guys like "Do you know him?"
"No."
"What about him?"
"No wade."
"Oh! What about that guy? He looks important."
Until eventually Logan DOES recognize someone and perks up like an adopted senior dog seeing it's past owner.
"Oh.. Oh my god.. That's fucking Boot!"
Wade gets excited and is like "Yeah!! Boot- wait whos boot? Tell me about Boot you old beautiful beast of a man."
He starts talking about this bunkie he had while Wades kicking his feet and litsening bc no duh he loves hearing these weird stories and suddenly he stops and is like "Holy shit- that's ME" and sure enough on the screen is Boot and Logan in the back of a truck, reloading a very large gun.
"Why's he called boot?"
"Because he was an amputee so he only ever needed one boot."
"That's.. really sad actually."
"It was hilarious at the time... Anyway.. dosn't matter. He's probably super dead by now anyway."
Afterwards, seeing how bummed out this made him, Wade uses that big brain of his and his annoying mouth to actually FIND Boot (Whos real name is Carl) and as a suprise takes Logan to a nursing home to see a really old Boot.
As great as the gesture is and how happy Logan was for those first couple of days, It soon dawns on Wade that Oh shit... Boots going to die eventually and its going to break Logans heart. What has he done? So now hes emotionally conflicted because yes, Logan was ecstatic to see him but Logan isn't dumb. The mans 83 for god sake.
To be continued..
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roanniom · 2 years ago
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I have this thought that Eddie doesn’t really like when girls are all over him at shows. Like it just makes him uncomfortable to have people swarming him like they don’t even care about the music. And he doesn’t LIKE making you jealous. BUT when you come to his shows he loves how possessive you get after watching all the girls try to get his attention afterwards, loves when you hang all over him on the drive home, barely waiting til you get inside before your hands are down his pants and you’re biting his sweaty neck and remind him he’s yours. And he’s such a jerk about it too, acting all innocent like “what brought this on?” when he’s clearly getting what he wanted this whole time.
Eddie “What’s Got You All Worked Up” Munson is my absolute favorite. I love him so much but also how dare he play dumb.
I have my hand down your pants, sir, because after seeing other girls fawning all over you, I need to remind you who the goods belong to.
Easily
Eddie Munson x Fem!reader
Warnings: NSFW, 18+ Only, semi public sex, hand job, dirty talk, mild jealousy/possessiveness but everyone is faithful and trusting ultimately
You’ve got him shoved up against a wall in an alley behind The Hideout, placing sloppy sucking kisses to his pulse point.
And the bastard is just grinning and moaning.
“Fuck, baby. Need me that bad after all that?”
“Shut the fuck up, Eddie. The whole block will hear you,” you chide him, even as your hands start undoing his belt. Eddie chuckles and gropes you through your clothes.
“Thought that’s what you wanted. Why else would you be trying to fuck me out in the open like this?”
You jut your chin out indignantly.
“I’m not trying to fuck you out in the open,” you contradict. Eddie’s brows knit together in confusion.
“But then what are you - fuck,” he cuts himself off when you wrap your hand around his cock, gathering the already leaking precum from the tip with your thumb.
“I’m gonna jerk you off in the open. Remind you who’s the one who gets you off so easily, pretty boy,�� you say with a cheeky grin. Eddie’s face has flushed a brilliant red and his chest is already heaving though you’ve barely touched him.
“Jesus H Christ,” he moans, this time quieter and a lot less performative.
You love him like this. You love him at his loudest, too, of course. When he’s a motormouth dirty talking a mile a minute.
But you just can’t get enough of the other side that shows from time to time. Like right now as he watches you with big, wide, hazy eyes. His wet lip quivers, mouth parting on a gasp. His hips roll up into your grasp, thrusting up into your hand. The leaking, aching length of him throbbing as you tug.
When his hands grip hard at your arms and his eyelids start fluttering you up the ante.
“You gonna cum already, pretty boy?”
“F-fuck…yeah…I’m…fuck…”
You speed up your hand and he bites back a groan.
“Told ya. I’m the one who gets you off the easily, yeah?”
“Yeah, oh god—.” Before he can continue getting louder you surge forward and capture his mouth in a kiss. Well, it’s a one sided kiss, because I’m a second he’s thrown over the edge, cumming all over your hand and mashing his open mouth to yours with an aimless desperation that has you preening with pride.
He shudders in your arms and you wait till he takes a deep breath to pull back. Eddie leans back against the wall, sweaty and with his hair beautifully and obviously mussed up.
While he tucks himself back in his pants, you lift your hand to your mouth and lick his cum off your fingers like an ice cream cone.
“Oh fuuuck,” he intones, and you don’t miss the way his cock twitches in his hand before he shoves it back in his boxers, trying to will away the resurgence of lust. When you’ve licked your hand clean he grabs and you and try’s to steer you to his van. “Okay we’re leaving.”
“Woah woah woah, not so fast,” you say, digging your heels in to stop him. Eddie seems flustered.
“You don’t want to get home so I can return the favor?” he asks. He leans into your space with a grin. “I know you, and I know those panties have gotta be soaked by now, Princess.”
“Oh they are. I want to ride you till you can’t cum anymore, pretty boy,” you say with a smile that has Eddie swallowing audibly. He tries to tug you to the van again but you laugh and pull him back. “Buuut. First we’re gonna go back in there. You’re gonna buy me a drink, and you’re gonna let all those other girls see how beautifully disheveled you look.”
For good measure you run your fingers through his hair again, messing it up further. Eddie laughs at your audacity and leans in to give you a kiss, one almost too chaste for the current situation.
“Fine by me. What’re you drinking, m’lady?”
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alwaysahiccupandastrid · 2 years ago
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His Dark Materials Season 3 - Full Season Thoughts
When I say that I’ve been waiting for this not just for two years since S2 but also for 15-ish years since I read the book, I truly am not exaggerated, I just know that I’m going to be a MESS and bawling at the end of it.
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Warning: not only for spoilers under the cut but also because I’m fangirling AND screaming a lot about this series so… yep! Be prepared!
Episode 1: The Enchanted Sleeper
I HAVE MISSED THIS SHOW SO FUCKING MUCH
AMBER SPYGLASS ADAPTATION HERE WE GO 10 YEAR OLD ME IS CRYING SCREAMING SHAKING THROWING UP
Will looking for Lyra 😭❤️
The fact that in her dream-state, the first thing Lyra asked for was Pan, and me knowing what’s coming??? Oh, this season will truly break my damn heart-
ROGER ROGER ROGER 😭😭😭😭
THE TITLE CREDITS CHANGED AND I SAW THE LAND OF THE DEAD AND HARPIES AND ALSO THE MULEFA ASDFGHJKL
DADDY ASRIEL BELACQUA IS BACK ASDFGHJKL
Stelmaria is so bloody beautiful, oh my god, Asriel truly has such a beautiful dæmon
THE GALLIVESPIANS ASDFGHJKL HOLY FUCK EVERYONE ITS ALL COMING TOGETHER
Am admittedly a little disappointed they’re not riding dragonflies or anything
ASRIEL IS WAGING HIS WAR IT’S HAPPENING
I’m so ridiculous, I fangirled seeing Ama because I was like “I REMEMBER HER FROM THE BOOK”
The BSL between Mrs Coulter and Ama omg I was not expecting that but I was literally captivated the entire time they were on-screen, 11/10 choice
Pan weakly asking Mrs Coulter to let them go 😭 also hi Kit Connor, I keep forgetting you’re the voice of Pan in this series
Why is Father Gomez… hot tho 💀
THE GAY ANGELS KISSED THIS IS GOD TIER FUCKING CONTENT GOD FUCKING BLEEEESSSSS
Baruch and Balthamos, yet another reason my heart is going to fucking shatter tonight
Ogunwe’s eldest daughter being “soulless” and Asriel explaining it by explaining his and Stelmaria’s bond and saying what happened to the girl is the same as cutting his dæmon/soul away 😭
Lyra managing to escape but she’s so weak that she didn’t get far and Marisa caught her 😔
The mother-daughter dynamic is so interesting in such a messed up way, like Marisa truly thinks what she’s doing is right and will protect Lyra but also her method of keeping her daughter safe is to drug her and keep her asleep in a cave/hideaway somewhere, truly unstable and unhealthy parenting techniques here
Ama saw her chloroforming Lyra oh my god 😦
IOREK LOOKING FOR LYRA OH MY GOD 😭 HE LOVES HER SO MUCH I LOVE ONE BEAR DAD AND HIS HUMAN DAUGHTER
Will really sliced Iorek’s helmet like it was butter, no wonder Iorek was like “nope I’m not fighting I can’t fight a knife that does that to my armour”
Not Father Gomez sniffing Mrs Coulter’s (?) dress 💀
Oh no no no not the spy fly things being sent after Mrs Coulter, Jesus H-
Marisa telling the monkey to leave her alone and he just doesn’t??? Like he wants to try and comfort her but doesn’t know how, and he doesn’t say anything but she knows what he’s thinking??? Their dynamic is so messed up, I love it
“Welcome to the Republic of Heaven, Commander” CHILLS LITERAL CHILLS
They ended the episode with an “in memory of” for Helen McCrory (the voice of Stelmaria in S1&2) and I nearly started bawling oh my god
Episode 2: The Break
“Nearly 400 years with Baruch must have mellowed me” - OH MY GOD T H E M
“We feel as one, though we are two” - THEY ARE SO…?!? THIS IS BEAUTIFUL ASDFGHJKL
“And you’ll find a way to protect the one you love” - 😭😭😭
SPYFLY?!
I know it’s been three years since the end of S1 aired and obviously the young actors grow fast, but damn is Roger’s voice deeper than when he died
“They’re hurting me” - NOOOOOOOOOO
“Just tell me where you are and I’ll find you!” “... The Land of the Dead” - FUCK ME
Lyra screaming for Roger like that, I feel so sick
Pan’s little ermine noises are so cute omg
“Where did you go? I... I couldn’t follow you there.” (Pan to Lyra) - NOT THE FORESHADOWING, JUST RUN ME THROUGH WITH A KNIFE AT THIS POINT, IT WOULD FUCKING HURT LESS JESUS FUCKING CHRIST
QUEEN RUTA SKADI AAAAAAHHHHH
“It would take more than a little crash to put an end to the pair of us” - I swear to fucking god, if this is more foreshadowing-
(it’s been a few years since I read TAS, okay, give me a break if I’ve forgotten anything)
AAAHHHH MARY MALONE I MISSED YOU
Wait did she just walk into Ogunwe’s camp???
“Something happened here a few days ago and now they’re everywhere” - WHAT ARE??? IS IT THE BUZZING???
The way I tensed up seeing Marisa approach Ama jesus christ i do NOT trust that woman
Also Ama’s outfit reminded me of Lyra’s Jordan College outfit from the film, like the red pinafore and blue dress underneath I mean
ROKE??? AND HE MENTIONED LADY SALMAKIA AAAAHHHHHHH
“When is Lyra not in danger?” - LMFAO true though
“You dismiss Lyra too easily” - Exactly, thank you Stelmaria! Was not expecting her to come through for Lyra but I’m pleased!
“Eve was the Mother of Creation, Lyra is simply the creation of Marisa and I. She is not Eve, she’s a little girl” - OOF
“She must have some information they need or some skill we’ve overlooked.” “Other than being able to read the Alethiometer, she has very little, I’m afraid... other than a nose for trouble” - DAMN ALRIGHT CHILL ASRIEL
The way that Stelmaria snarled so angrily at him talking about Lyra like that oh my GOD
“What??? What would you like me to say?” “The truth.” - FUCK YEAH, Stelmaria, call out your human like that!
“There are angels above the camp” - OOH SHIT
“What are they doing?” “They’re fighting” - OH FUCK WAIT I THINK I REMEMBER THIS NO-
I AM NOT READY TO LOSE BARUCH YET NO NO NO NO FU-
“He’s leaving us” — NO FUCK OFF FUCK OFF I FUCKING CANT DO THIS TODAY-
“My Balthamos” - IM NEVER GOING TO RECOVER FROM THIS, NEVER, THIS IS TOO PAINFUL
HIS LAST WORD WAS “BALTHAMOS” I AM GOING TO SCREAM
Yes we got gay angels kissing but at what cOST 😭😭😭😭😭😭
BALTHAMOS FEELING IT WHEN BARUCH DIES ASDFGHJKL NO I CANNOT COPE, IM GONNA BE SICK, THIS IS SICK, PHILIP PULLMAN IM HIDING UNDER YOUR BED
“This is your fault… you forced me to come here! I wanted us to stay together, I wanted to go with him! They’ve killed him!” - literally STAB ME, it would hurt FAR less 😭
Father Gomez is so hot but he has a spider dæmon so it’s a hard no from me 🙈
“I once killed an innocent young boy in order to harness it (Dust)” - yeah, and we still haven’t FUCKIN forgiven you 
Not Asriel straight up torturing Alarbus in his Dust experimenting chamber :l though he DID kill Baruch so...
“You think you’re significant - He does not even know your name” - DAMN, what a sick burn
“We have a life in the resistance; we can read, write, learn... all those things are forbidden by the temple, especially for-” “Girls.” - oh damn. It’s obvious that this is a commentary on teachings by the church or whatever, especially how it used to be in the past. (My brain is tired so I can’t do full analysis, but I’m sure other people out there will do it better than me)
The girls wanting Mary to stay “to rest” and then asking her about why she’s looking for the girl while pouring her a drink... feels very ominous to me and I hope I’m wrong
(Spoiler alert: I was wrong)
The Magisterium straight up sending out a death squad to kill Lyra, Jesus Christ it’s almost hilarious how far gone they are that they can’t see why killing a teenage girl is wrong, like mother of sin or not, that is still a teenage girl
Will to Iorek: You attract too much attention - YOU DON’T SAY LMAO HE’S LITERALLY AN ARMOURED BEAR
Of course Balthamos knows sign language, that literally makes so much sense because he’s an angel so of course he’d know literally every language in history - and so of course he appears and translates because she can’t hear Will and he doesn’t sign. I love it
I know only a small amount of BSL but I felt so happy when I was able to read Balthamos signing “W-I-L-L” and Ama finger-signing her own name
“But no mother could possibly be this cruel.” “This mother would.” - DAAAAAAAMN
She’s growing sunroot, which is a waking medicine oh my gOD I love Ama, she is truly an icon in her own right even though she’s only in two episodes
Will smiling a little when he sees Lyra sleeping :’)
THE WAY I JUMPED AT MARISA’S VOICE OMG
“I always suspected that you were coming, but I didn’t think you’d be the first” - oh my god, she KNEW Will would come sooner or later, she knows how much he cares for Lyra
Her offering him tea and my first thought being “do NOT drink anything she gives you, do NOT do it”
“I’m keeping her here because I’m her mother, and I love her” - BITCH, you’re straight up drugging her, mother or not you are NOT showing your love in a healthy way
See, I get that she says she’s trying to keep Lyra safe because she knows the Magisterium want her dead, but like... drugging her? Keeping her there against her will? Ma’am, please-
“Because she hates me, Will, and if I woke her she’d run” - damn I’m not surprised, you’ve not exactly been the most loving of mothers at this point
“Wouldn’t your mother do the same for you? A child needs their mother. You understand that, Will. You need your mother” - oh NO, no, no, do NOT bring up Mrs Perry!!!
“And here’s the trick they never tell you: your mother needs you” - oh she’s a goddamn SNAKE
“You promise that you’re keeping her safe? That you’ll carry on keeping her safe?” - Will, nOOO do NOT leave her there
Oh, she nearly CRAPPED herself when he mentioned going to Asriel
“I have seen them together; where one goes, the other follows” - literally everyone else notices it, they’re really not subtle
“You would use your own daughter as a trap?” - yeah, no, that really doesn’t shock me at this point, the man has no fuckin morals anymore
Oh okay PHEW, Will actually has a plan and isn’t just blindly trusting Marisa, I’m resting a little easier now
“I’m counting my steps - we’ll return by them in another world” - OH SHIT HERE WE GO
Nah, that monkey is STILL giving me the chills, fucking hate that monkey so bad
“Your mind is muddled” - this episode has featured so much Stelmaria calling Asriel out, and that’s content I’m honestly living for
Marisa giving the monkey a massive rock and going “do your worst”... AND THEN SHE LOWERED HER HEAD AND HE SMACKED HER OVER THE HEAD WITH IT WHAT IN THE FUCK IS GOING ON I LITERALLY GASPED, like she clearly was telling him to do it but WHYYYYY???
Ama was so ready to go with Will and help him, we have to stan
So now Marisa looks battered and bruised...? I’m guessing she’s got some kind of plan here???
Ohhhh okay, I get her plan now: she looks all beaten up, she tells Gomez that Will has come and taken Lyra, it looks like Will has hurt her when he stole Lyra, Gomez will then hopefully leave thinking that she doesn’t still have Lyra... got it. Bit extreme to have your dæmon beat the shit out of you though
“You know, he had several hundred miles and the boundaries between worlds to cross, and yet... he still managed to get here before you. Bravo.” - LMFAO the shade
“... I am going to take Lyra now, Mrs Coulter” - Oh he didn’t fall for it in the slightest lmao he was like “well, at least you tried”
“you gave her the terrible punishment of her existence” is such a cruel line, jesus christ my dude
He’s not even trying to hide the fact that they want to murder her daughter omg
THE WINDOW IS FORMING ASDFGHJKL WILL IS COMING
Is she trying to distract Gomez so he doesn’t see Will and the knife?!? Is she actually doing something good???
Pan hopping into Will’s coat pocket omg that’s so cute I love it
THAT MONKEY IS FERAL
SHE WHACKED HIM OVER THE HEAD OH MY GOD
“Oh dear… perhaps you were right about that strength” - LMAO she’s so iconic
Not Marisa thinking she’s coming with him and Lyra 💀 I don’t know whether I feel sorry for her or not at this point
“Do you think it’s that easy to dispose of me? Is that what you do, Will? Was your mother as easily disposed of? Where did you leave her?” - ACTUALLY NAH YOU KNOW WHAT, I don’t feel sorry for her at all
His mind isn’t empty enough, she’s distracting him, he’s gonna break the knife 😭😭😭
THE KNIFE BROKE I KNEW IT WAS COMING BUT DAMN
NOT HER THREATENING WILL WITH A GUN AND LYRA STANDING IN FRONT OF HIM TO PROTECT HIM
AH THE GALLIVESPIAN STINGING HER YESSSSS
The airships shooting at them and Iorek immediately jumping to defend them I’m-
“Iorek’s here?” - YES, HE LOVES YOU SO MUCH 😭
Ama jumping on that soldier and Will killing him before he can kill her I’m-
Asriel really arrived super late to the party, literally all the fighting is over and done with 💀
Ohhhh he’s seen Marisa 👀
Lyra taking Will’s hand as they lie together under the stars 😭❤️
Episode 3: The Intention Craft
I’m gonna try to keep my notes a little bit briefer because it took me two hours to watch a 57 minute episode on episode 2 :’( this is 8 hours worth of tv, it’s currently 00:20 am and we’ve only done two episodes so... yeah
NOT THE SHOT OF THE DÆMON (presumably Pan) ALONE ON A DOCK ASDFGHJKL; YALL THIS IS SICK
“Whatever happens... we’ll be together” - having read the book is both a blessing and a curse because on the one hand I’m somewhat able to prepare myself beforehand but on the other I KNOW how painful this is about to be and I can’t stand it
Oooh Marisa is Asriel’s prisoner :O
I think Asriel is enjoying having her as his prisoner a bit TOO much
The way he was right behind her, so close he was literally breathing on her neck as he tied her up... asdfghjkl;
“You could be standing here beside me, you know” - NOT THE MARISA/ASRIEL FEELS asdfghjkl
*taking her necklace in hand* “still wear this?” - ASDFGHJKL did he give that to her?? Or is it just one of those “oh you still wear this?” things???
“How could you and I have produced another Eve?” - no but same, I’m still wondering that lmfao
Not him calling Lyra a “wretched girl” and acting like it’s her fault Marisa turned up to whisk her away?!
Did they collar and chain up her monkey dæmon too??? Damn, he knows her well lmao
“You seem different.” “So do you.” “...you’re staring.” - oh my gOD
Not Salmakia spying on them :’) “I haven’t been hiding, you just haven’t been looking” LMAO
“How do I know you won’t cut into another world?” - umm because the knife’s broken??? It ain’t cutting shit right now
Ahhh she’s got her Alethiometer back! All is right with the world :3
“Since he’s died, I’ve done none of the things he’s asked me to do” - awww Will :(
Are we gonna meet the Mulefa this episode? The next one? :O
“Because Roger’s dead body was in a cage! In a cage that he made, he killed him!” - when she puts it like that, I’m not shocked she wants nothing to do with Asriel anymore, damn
“to work alongside a murderer?!” - 1) Will is a murderer? 2) The reason she trusted Will was because the Alethiometer told her he was a murderer?? But I get what she means
I don’t like when Will and Lyra argue :( 
“Lyra is pushing him to do things he doesn’t want to do.” “Oh, she is her mother’s daughter!” “You don’t trust her?” “She’s also mine.” - LMFAO TRUE ENOUGH
The device Asriel is using to communicate with Salmakia with is so cool omg
Father MacPhail really just sitting there in the dark all like “where have you gone??” I think he’s losing it a little
RED PANDA PAN AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH
“You’re not always right, you know that?” - LMAO I love Lyra and Pan so much
“Your father was right about you - you are insufferable” - OOF DAMN
NOT THEM LEADING THE MONKEY ON A CHAIN LIKE A DOG 
At least they gave her new clothes I guess?
“I have been the worst mother in the world” - NO SHIT
“I didn’t think of her for years - and if I did, it was only to regret the embarrassment of her birth, the humiliation-” “Ridiculous! I have never understood why a child born of our love should be a humiliation!” “An illegitimate child and a murdered husband! That is quite something to carry on my back” -- Damn, this trial literally just became a couple’s counselling session for Marisa and Asriel??? And Asriel straight up admitting he loved her??? That they loved each other??? 
I will not ship them, I will NOT ship them, I WILL NOT-
“What if Iorek’s not there?” “He wouldn’t leave without me” - AND WE ALL KNOW IT ASDFGHJKL
“I know it wasn’t real, but once or twice I woke up and she was holding me... never been held before” - I’M NOT CRYING YOU ARE-
IOREK AND LYRA REUNITING, HER HUGGING HIM IM SOBBING ACTUALLY I LOVE ONE GIRL AND ONE BEAR-
There’s something very special to me about Lyra sitting against Iorek’s flank, I can’t explain how soft it is
“Huh, still a Silvertongue” - asdfghjkl; he’s the one who gave her that name, it’s literally a title he bestowed on her, I love it :’)
Oh no, is Dr Cooper the one from Bolvanger??? Am I remembering correctly???
“Ah yes... you always were easily impressed by what he made” - DAMN I should NOT have cackled like I did
I can’t get over how charged the scenes between Asriel and Marisa are, my goodness-
“The inventor of hideous machines, capable of tearing children apart” - you’re one to talk, remember what you did to Roger????
“But along comes some foul mouthed arrogant little brat with dirt under her fingernails, and ohhh you can love her! You cluck and you settle your feathers over her like a mother hen-” - JESUS I’M-...?!?
The way he slammed her up against the intention craft after she spat at him, his hand on her face... I thought they were gonna kiss, holy SHIT
“Every hideous thing that you’ve done in his name... and it was all a lie” - DAMN, this episode is cutting so deep in all the best ways
It’s the way I know what’s going to happen, I know the knife is fixed, and yet I’m still nervous
“Find what matters!” *glances to Lyra* - oh they are NOT slick, they’re so obvious about this and I’m all for it
Imagine being Will and waking up to see a massive looming bear standing over you, omfg
YAY, the knife is fixed! (I knew it would be but still) I love that it looks more twisted, at least in my opinion
“You will always be a welcome visitor to Svalbard, and the same is true to you, Will. You are worthy of each other. Goodbye, Lyra Silvertongue - I hope we do meet again one day.” - NOT ME CRYING OVER AN ARMOURED BEAR’S RELATIONSHIP WITH A GIRL
Now why is Asriel showing the prisoner angel to Marisa, no good will come of this-?
“He’s beautiful.” “Everyone’s beautiful.” - this plus the way he keeps leaning and shit around her... at this point, everything Asriel has done this episode just straight up seems like him flirting with Marisa lmao
Eyyyy Balthamos is back!!!
Balthamos: so, you ready to go to Asriel yet? // Will: LOL sorry nope 
And just as soon as he was back, he went away again :O
“my mum’s always said if a friend needs help, you should give it” - Will Parry is his mother’s son through and through :’)
“That no doubt depends.” “On what?” “What Asriel does to him.” - oh god he’s gonna fucking kill that angel and cause more chaos, I can feel it
NOT ASRIEL AND MARISA TEAMING UP TO TORTURE THE ANGEL AND DESTROY HIM
Damn even Marisa looks kinda freaked out by Asriel torturing the fucking angel oh my god
LMAO SHE RAN SO FAST TO THE INTENTION CRAFT 
“Goodbye Asriel” should NOT have hit me so hard, oh my goodness
Yeah, no, I don’t think the knife can cut through to the land of the dead? Which makes sense all things considered
OH, the last world he could cut to before the land of the dead is the desert wasteland one from Lyra’s dreams! :O
Pan like “wait, this doesn’t feel safe” and backing away whimpering :’(
IS THE SAD THING GONNA HAPPEN NEXT EPISODE NO NO NO I CANT HANDLE IT
I thought we’d have until like episode 6 or something :’(
Episode 4: Lyra and Her Death
Judging from the title of this episode... FUCK I AM NOT READY WHAT DO YOU MEAN WE’RE AT THIS POINT ALREADY
(If it’s not this episode then it’ll probably be the next one, either way I’m not READY)
Pan: *whimpering* // Lyra: Pan, stop that - :’(
“Then where are everyone’s dæmons?” “We’ve been in plenty of worlds without dæmons before, just get in my pocket and we’ll be fine.” “There are people here who should have dæmons but don’t.” - PAN IS GONNA MAKE ME SOB THIS EPISODE ASDFGHJKL
Not Marisa running straight back to the Magisterium jesus christ girl why
“Good. This is good.” - NO IT FUCKING ISN’T LYRA
“How long do we wait?” “Until you die, of course!” - well, I mean, it IS the land of the dead so...
I genuinely cannot tell what is going on in Gomez’s head at this point O_o he’s so creepy
“Somewhere out there is a tempter, a serpent, and I had to keep them from meeting” - but here’s the thing: the angel told Mary that she was to play the role of serpent, and she and Lyra have already met. But also, Marisa maybe thinks the serpent is Will, which adds a whole new layer to this whole situation???
“And the way he (Asriel) is fighting, Hugh... it’s is terrifying” - oh look, me and Marisa agree on something for once!
“Sometimes your devotion is hard to read” - lmao true
“You have my mind, my body, and my soul (...) He could never resist temptation, whereas you... your abstinence is magnificent” - exCUSE ME WHAT MARISA????
I deadass thought he was about to try and force himself on her then
“Remember what we did together... our lives are entwined” - UMMMM??? I’m not the only one reading into that in a slightly sexual way, right??
Who knew that the waiting area in the land of the dead was like your everyday doctor’s waiting room, complete with grating elevator music??
I both want to know what’s in the chest Gomez gave Marisa and I also do not want to know O_o “it’s how we found you, a kind gift”?
Is there some generational mother-daughter trauma theme going on here or...? Because she said “mother” and he said “she was only too happy to help”, and her response was “of course she was”?
Is Mary in the Mulefa world right now???
“Feels like we’re in a horror film.” “... Why would you want to watch a film that makes you feel horrible?” “...You make a good point.” “I like the film with the bear.” - ASDFGHJKL, THIS WHOLE CONVERSATION XD Also the reference back to S2 where they were watching Paddington omg
“Everyone has a Death. Goes everywhere with them, all their life long.” (Lyra: Isn’t that scary?) (Larissa(?): Not at all, dear. It’s natural) “From the moment you’re born... your Death comes into the world with you. And it’s your Death that takes you out. There’s love in that.” - Pan’s little face :’(
“When you’re ready, they say it’s beautiful. Your Death says, ‘easy now, easy child, you come along with me’. And you go with them, to the boat and the boatman.” - not me getting emotional over the talk of death, fuck me-
Pan retreating back into Lyra’s pocket sadly, like he KNOWS he won’t be allowed to go with them, I hate it here-
DAMN, Marisa slaying in that purple dress with heels, holy shit-
“If you won’t stop...” “You’ll do what, exactly?” *dramatic music stops* “... I’ll fetch support.” “Good. We all need support.” - BAHAHAHAAHAHA This show is a fucking comedy at times oh my god
The fact that any part of the dæmon guillotine design is being reused is horrendous, let alone as a fuckin BOMB
“*casually* Oh. They’re here for me.” - LMAO
“Wait: can we talk about this?” - Will asking the REAL questions here omg let’s not do this please
Lyra: You were on my side. // Pan:... I thought I was by your side.” - STOP RIGHT NOW FUCK YOU
Lyra’s Death is there?!?! And she’s just leaving Will?!
Pan running after Lyra as she walks with her Death, I’m about to sob
Not them taking a lock of Lyra’s hair from Marisa while she sleeps??? And her sending Roke after Gomez, she was pretending to be asleep asdfghjkl
They’re using the lock of Lyra’s hair that Marisa has kept to aim the bomb at Lyra?!? Jesus fucking Christ, and they still think they’re the good guys here???
“I’m always here. I’ve followed you your entire life. I am a special devoted friend who’s been beside you every moment of your life. Who knows you better than anyone. Who knows you better than even you know yourself.” - oh shit
Also Pan being like “that’s not true!”, like he’s so offended by her Death saying that when he’s right there
If I remember correctly, wasn’t Lyra’s Death male in the book? Or...?
“I don’t want to be exceptional. Maybe once I did. My parents... that’s all they care about. I just want to be good. I just want to help someone, and Roger needs me... and I wasn’t there the last time he needed me.” - oh my heart is hurting so bad right now because in S1E02 I’m pretty sure she said to Pan that no one ever thought they’d be exceptional etc, and also the fact she still feels guilt for Roger’s death :’(
I’ve spent 15 years trying to imagine what a mulefa looks like... and now finally I know! Oh my goodness?!?! And it brought Mary food?!?
“You take me into the BEST places, you know that?” - LMAO Will’s so funny when he wants to be
“What else is there left to do?” Oh, I don’t know, Doctor Cooper, maybe NOT make a fricking bomb??? Also eyyyy Roke stung her!
“Arrogance. Sheer arrogance. I underestimated them” - yeah, no kidding, Marisa
Oof Marisa’s on a damn warpath, she’s gonna destroy the Magisterium and I’m so here for it
“What if we don’t come back?” “Then we’ll have died doing something important” - I’m way too emotional for this episode, I’m already losing my mind and emotions and I know it’s just going to get worse and worse :’(
Marisa calling out MacPhail as a sinner oh this is delicious the tea is so delicious today
“You have no right here; you are a wanton woman who has always wanted what she didn’t have. Your husband was killed by your lover, the heretic Asriel, and your illegitimate child was abandoned until she became sin itself.” - OH DAMN
“You will address me as Father President or Your Grace” - damn, man is on a freaking power trip?!?!
“I’m sorry? This is where your loyalty lies? Not with that above? Not with truth but with power?” - Marisa is spilling ALL the truth today oh my lord she did not come to play around
“This is all you really are: an incoherent, emotional woman. Why should anyone trust you? You can barely string a sentence together” - OH YOU LIL BITCH I’M ABOUT TO THROW THESE HANDS
He took her locket?!? 
“And when we sever your dæmon, you will be the bullet to kill Lyra Belacqua and to save us all from sin” - on the one hand, isn’t it ironic that her own dæmon severing technology is about to be used on her? But on the other, this man is one cruel motherfucker and I’m raging right now, FUCK this dude
“Take her to the cells... and bring her dæmon to me” - nah man, I’m about to be sick, fuck these motherfuckers. Fucking MEN, AM I RIGHT
Oh no. Oh no no no we’re at the docks and Pan is whimpering already I’m not strong enough today for this-
“I’m sorry, one of your party is unsuitable for travel at this time” - NO NO NO NO NO NO NO-
“We have to follow the rules. A pain, but necessary. No passage. Not for him.” “But he is me.” “If you come, he must stay.” “I don’t think you understand, if we separate we die.” “But isn’t that what you want?” - I’m really about to be crying at 2:30am over Lyra and Pan again aren’t I????
Pan running away because he knows Lyra will follow and he thinks it will stop it from happening, my HEART
“No, that’s not right, I don’t leave part of myself behind, why should she?” “Yes, you do, absolutely, you do. It’s her misfortune - or luck - to be able to see and talk to the part she must leave. You will not know until you are in the water, and by that time fortunately - or unfortunately - it will be too late for you to do anything about it. But you must all leave that part of yourselves here.” - NO NO NO NO NO I’m just going to keep chanting it until it stops fUCK
“We’re gonna get on the boat. Don’t worry.” “Lyra, you’re not listening to him, he won’t let us.” - AND LYRA BRINGING PAN ON THE BOAT TRYING TO CONVINCE HIM :’(((( she even tries to pull the thing herself but she can’t, I’m siCK-
“We can’t separate... we can’t...” :( :( 
“I’ve taken millions across... none have come back.” “We will. You don’t know Lyra and you don’t know me, but we’ll find a way. Another way. So since we’re doing that, be kind, boatman. Let her take her dæmon.” - Will trying so hard to get them to take Pan, even brandishing the knife, but it’s not happening asdfghjkl
“How many ages do you think I’ve been ferrying people? Do you think if anything could hurt me, it wouldn’t have happened already? You think the people I carry come with me gladly?! No, they struggle, they cry, they bribe, they threaten, they fight! Nothing works!” - :(
The entirety of the Lyra and Pan exchange had me outloud sobbing, clutching my chest in pain, I’ve got to share it all with you...
Lyra: I don’t want you leave you here.
Pan: We can still turn around.
Lyra: But I can’t not do this.
Pan: You can, Lyra.
Lyra: What about Roger? And Sal? They never got a chance to grow up.
Pan: But it’s not Roger and Sal, is it? Roger’s dead, and Sal is gone! And it won’t be Lyra and Pan, you’re leave me here, alone! What will I do?
Lyra: But our dreams…
Pan: I didn’t have those dreams! They were your dreams, I didn’t even want to come here! This is your choice!
Lyra: But we’re together…
Pan: Not if you do this.
Lyra: Please… I can’t betray Roger. It’s my fault he’s dead and now he needs me.
Pan: I need you too! Why can’t you see that? … Where will I go?
Lyra: I’ll find you… okay? I will go to the Land of the Dead and I’ll come back, and I’ll find you. I’m not leaving you… ‘Kay? I’m not leaving you, not forever. Will and me will find a way out of here, and we’ll go to Asriel’s, somehow you’ve got to get there too, but I have to do this.
Pan:… Then you’ve made up your mind. You’ve chosen Roger over me.
Lyra: No, Pan… please don’t, don’t… please… there’s no other way. I’ve got to… I love you.
Pan:… Just… go.
The way Lyra turned her head to watch him, the way Pan came up to the very edge of the dock and started crying, the two of them watching each other as they drifted further and further apart, the soundtrack... I am a fucking MESS
“My heart...” 😭💔
Lyra’s pained screams oh my GOD and Will holding her I’m not OKAY
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Episode 5: No Way Out
My heart is already broken from last episode, I don’t know how much worse I can feel at this point 😭
Oh good, we’re starting with mulefa hijinks! (Sort of)
Mary stopping and having a moment of “what am I doing?… following a talking elephant” 🤣
IT SKATING AROUND ON PODS ASDFGHJKL
Lyra and Will: *having literally the worst times of their lives* // Mary: *playing with the Mulefa and living her best life*
The Mulefa having their own language oh my god and the orange subtitles fading to the white English ones omg because she’s learning their language
Baby Mulefa 😭❤️
Oof we’re right back to pain 🤡
“What does it feel like, being this far away from him? From Pan?” “It’s like an iron hand is gripped around my heart and is yanking it out between my ribs.” “And it’s mental too, right? As if some private secret thing’s been dragged out into the open?” “…yeah.” — 😭
“You know, you always said I must have a dæmon and I never believed you… and now it feels like I’ve known her my whole life. Maybe she’s with Pan now.” - ASDFGHJKL KIRJAVA IS COMING IM-
“Wait. If my dæmon’s still at the jetty, can you give him a message?” “I can tell you now, he won’t be.” 😭😭😭😭
Oooh Land of the Dead here we go!
I’m still curious as to why exactly Marisa and the monkey can separate so far? Have they already been intercised or something? Like they can REALLY go far from each other 🤔
“They intend to sever you from your dæmon!” “… Good.” — EXCUSE ME MARISA???? She really hates the little thing doesn’t she, damn
“It’s not made of rock… it’s made of people’s things” - oh damn
Oh my gosh the dead 😭
“They don’t like it if we talk to each other.” “Who don’t?” - OH SHIT THE HARPIES
The little dead children talking about their dæmons 😭 “Mine was called Sandling. He used to think he’d be a bird, but I hoped he wouldn’t because I liked him all furry.” “My Kasta used to curl up in my hand and go to sleep.” “Mine was called Matapan” 😭😭
Not MacPhail going to touch the monkey but being interrupted by Father Gomez schooling him on how it’s forbidden 💀
HE JUST SLAPPED GOMEZ OMG
Nooo not her losing Will
NOT HER THINKING SHE SEES PAN NOOO ITS NOT REAL
“You left me on the jetty to die (…) I’ve always known deep down how selfish you are. You really believe you’re here for Roger - you already killed him. You came here for you, to assuage your guilt, to play the hero” - 😭😭😭😭 I know it’s not really Pan but still my heART
ROGER 😭💔
“I missed you. I’m so sorry, about everything. I should have let you go with the Gyptians and the kids… I shouldn’t have taken you to Asriel. If I’d have let you go, you wouldn’t be here, would you? You’d be…” “It wasn’t your fault. I wanted to go with you.” — 😭 my heart is a literal mess I’m blubbering
“Stop it! You think I want to go back to the real world? Like this?” - oh Roger…
Will not being able to cut a window out and it sounding like the knife is being grated over rock 😳
NOT THE HARPIES THIS IS NIGHTMARE FUEL IM-
“What kind of son abandons his own mother?” - SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP-
“You have destroyed the lives of everyone you’ve ever cared for… you’ve come here for you, to feel special… if only Will had never met you” - I would very much like to go back to Jordan College and rooftop adventures now thanks-
“I thought about us, and everything we’ve been through… I didn’t let them get into my head” 😭❤️💔
Not Fra Pavel deducing that Mary is the serpent and she’s in another world, and now Gomez is going to go after her 💀
Oh damn, the imagery of the snake and Eve painting(?) in the background as Gomez prepares himself
I SAW A GLIMPSE OF AMBER IS IT- IS IT TIME FOR THE SPYGLASS
MARY IS MAKING THE SPYGLASS THIS IS MY CHILDHOOD COMING TOGETHER
Oh. My. God. The view through the lens of Dust… ‘Sraf’ is Dust… oh my god. This is beautiful. The colours are beautiful.
“The trees are dying.” “And so are we.” 😭
“What do you remember about Jordan? You remember it, don’t you?” “… Jordan’s gone.” - stop that right nOW
Not the flashback to the very first episode of them in the cellar drinking Tokay 😭
The light appearing as they remember Jordan College together, talking about the roof and the rook with the broken leg 😭❤️ and all the dead people coming to listen, I’m gonna start bawling all over again
Lyra and Will speaking to the crowd and promising to try to get them out of this horrible world, rallying them 😭
“What will happen to us if we leave?” “I don’t know.” “You don’t know? If I will or won’t be able to see my son again?” “We can’t know until it happens - I’m not gonna lie or pretend. But in here, it’s just thoughts; out there, real things matter.”
“When we were alive, they told us that when we died, we’d go to Heaven. That’s why so many of us gave our lives, and spent years in prayer and silence, and all the joy of life went to waste around us. I don’t care what happens to us when we leave - anything is better than this.” - damn, this series really said fuck religion and fuck the church making people spend their lives in servitude/repenting for sins they haven’t even done
Damn, the harpies are NOT happy
“Will you tell us some stories? So we can remember too? Real things.” Ohh no, no, I will not cry over this, I will not cry over Lyra and Roger talking about Jordan College-
“I won every time.” “No she didn’t, she cheated every time” - yep, sounds like Lyra to me
Lyra recounting how she made the omelette with the shells in for Will 🤣
Lyra talking about Iorek 😭❤️
I have absolutely no love for that blasted monkey but seeing him all sad in the cage as they’re about to be severed… definitely made me feel sad, can’t believe I feel sorry for him
It looks like Marisa’s been strapped to an electric chair, like she’s about to be executed, and the imagery of that is 👌🏻
“When we created this technology together, you believed you were doing the right thing - we all did. But we were wrong. It has to stop.” - Damn, you don’t say! Of course it was wrong to sever children, glad you see that finally-
“Do not explain my own technology to me.” - OOF
“You still have time to repent - let me give you your final blessing” - MAN DO NOT FUCKIN TOUCH HER YOU FREAK
“Keep your hands off me… there’s too much blood on them for that.” - DAMN, MARISA
Everyone listening to Lyra’s stories 😭❤️
“… But you felt safe with Mr Scoresby. He was the first grown up I ever trusted.” - STOP THAT RIGHT NOW IM ALREADY CRYING I DONT NEED TO CRY AGAIN
“I will come with you. We… We will come with you.” - YESSSS
HOLY FUCK THE HARPY DESIGN IS SICKENINGLY HORRIFYING DEAR GOD AND THE WAY IT WENT RIGHT UP TO LYRA’S FACE
“What’s your name? You must have one.” “… No-Name.” - Oh gosh I think I remember more of the book now hang on
LEE SCORESBY AHHHHHHHH
LEE AND LYRA HUGGING 😭❤️ MY HEART I CANNOT BEAR THIS
LYRA DIDNT KNOW LEE DIED 😭 and he thought she was dead but he was so relieved she wasn’t 😭
“You found the Knife Bearer - you beat the shaman to it. Lyra Silvertongue, just when I thought you couldn’t blow my little mind enough times” - 😭❤️ I missed Lee so much ASDFGHJKL
IS THAT METATRON??? ENOCH??? OH MY GODDDDD
“If she had only stayed with us, and given her life to the Authority as she once intended, she would now be on the path to the kingdom” - oh my god MacPhail shut the fuck UP
Come on rOKE HURRY UP AND SAVE HER
NOT THE INTERCISION MACHINE V2 AND THE MONKEY LOOKING SCARED
Dr Cooper having second thoughts omg
SHE STOPPED IT LAST MINUTE OH GOD THE GASP I LET OUT
“… I will not be a part of this (…) I will not hurt her.” - YES DOCTOR DO SOMETHING GOOD FOR ONCE IN YOUR MISERABLE LIFE
FATHER MACPHAIL STRAIGHT UP MURDERED DR COOPER HOLY SHIT-
The Church REALLY are not coming across well here
NO NOT ROKE LEAVE HIM ALONE
KILL HIM MARISA KILL THAT BASTARD RELIGIOUS MAN
OKAY BUT YES ALSO TURN OFF THE MACHINE PLEASE DESTROY IT IF YOU CAN I CANT BREATHE THIS IS TOO TENSE
FATHER MACPHAIL COMMITTING SUICIDE AND SACRIFICING HIMSELF HES FUCKING INSANE IM SORRY THE HATRED HE HAS FOR LYRA IS THAT STRONG???
Thank FUCK she stopped the machine last minute although I kinda wish MacPhail had died lmao
THE LIGHT HOLY CRAP-
“You think Dust can make you Gods… let use see how you fare without it.” - OH SHIT OH SHIT
THE MACHINE SEVERED MACPHAIL AND HIS DAEMON AND SHE DISAPPEARED
NOOOOO NOT THE BOMB NOT THE BOMB TELL ME THAT AINT THE BOMB-
I know she’s not dead, I’ve read the book, plus there’s still 3 episodes left, I’m still freaking out though
Episode 6: The Abyss
Three more episodes and then it’s all over 😭 I don’t know if I’m ready for it to be honest
“In the beginning, Man was given the gift of Dust. It ignited his mind and freed his will. But that free will has corrupted mankind. Dust shall be drawn into eternal darkness once more… That which was given shall be taken away.” - oh my gOD what a narration to start an episode Jesus Christ (pardon the pun)
Marisa dragging herself across the floor to get to Lyra’s hair???
Please tell me Roke isn’t dead 😭 (spoiler: he is)
Marisa going to Fra Pavel with the hair and asking him to consult the Alethiometer on whether or not Lyra survived 😭
I still get chills at the opening theme, ngl, like we’re three whole series in and I’m STILL feeling chills seeing the opening credits
Eyyyy Serafina Pekkala!!!
The earth is literally crumbling apart and Asriel’s laughing 🫢
MARISA AND THE MONKEY ARE BACK AT ASRIEL’S
Stelmaria just being like “… It’s her”, as if there’s only one “her”
“She’s dead, Asriel. Lyra is dead.” - NOOOOOO OH NO NO NO
Nahh Asriel is so unbothered about Lyra being dead???
“Would you like me to tell you how your daughter died, or would you prefer to keep tinkering with your toys?” “If what you’re saying is true, I’m very sorry. But what I’m doing here is of the utmost importance - it’s going to change everything.” - DUDE YOUR DAUGHTER IS DEAD (or so it’s thought at the moment) HOW ARE YOU SO UNBOTHERED
Like we knew he was a shit father but YIKES
Marisa straight up telling Asriel it’s his fault their daughter is dead because he pissed off Metatron with his war crime, she disabled the bomb but the light triggered it… DAMN. Just… damn.
“You’ve taken my daughter from me… and I will never forgive you.” - ☹️😔
Roger trying to wake Lyra up 😭 thankfully she does wake but still-
Stelmaria telling Asriel he shouldn’t go down there, it’s reckless… Mate, listen to your fucking dæmon once in a while please, she got all the sense the two of you possess and you’ve got none I fear-
WHAT’S HAPPENING TO RUTA’S DÆMON HE DROPPED LIKE A STONE INTO THE ABYSS (the one where Asriel is)
“He can’t hear me…” “Stay with him” “I can’t stop him, the darkness is drawing him in…” - NO NO NO NO
Noooo SERGEI (her dæmon) DIED AND SO DID RUTA FUCK SAKE MAN
Lyra and Lee hugging again because they’re so happy to see each other okay 😭❤️ truly a better father to her than her own one ever was
Is there an abyss in each of the worlds? 🤔 because there’s one in the land of the dead too as well as where Asriel is
Will panicking because he’s scared he won’t be able to get these people out, and Lyra taking his face in her hands, “Look at me, look at me, look at me… it’s fine. We’re going to get out of here. It’s just… this chasm. I can feel it too. Look at me.” 😭
Lee whooping when Lyra jumped that chasm, we love a proud father!
Roger and Will disagreeing over who should go next and Lee just doing it instead 😂
“I am Serafina Pekkala, Queen of the Lake Enara clan, and I demand to know what happened to my sister” - YES WITCH QUEEN 👑
“It pains me to tell you both that what happened to Ruta was not death, but worse again. That abyss out there is a rupture in the multiverse, sucking all Dust deep down inside the void between the worlds. I bore witness to her dæmon Sergei falling inside… and it is my belief, that no being, flesh or Dust, will ever emerge from its darkness.” “… so there will be no peace for her? Part of her soul, forever falling… forever in limbo…” — NOPE, NO, NOOO 😭💔 poor Ruta I hate it here
(Turning to Asriel) “… You did this.” “No.” “Your arrogance, PLAYING WITH FORCES YOU HAVE NO CONCEPT OF!” - SHIT SHES RIGHT THOUGH
Sorry, what the FUCK are those things beneath them with the glowing eyes???
“We’ve seen worse. Do you remember when we freed the kids from Bolvanger? And then the three of us and Iorek squashed into Lee’s balloon and just flew away?” - lmao bless
“Iorek’s this armoured bear-.” “I know who he is, I’ve met him.” - damn, there’s some tension here between Roger and Will? Or is it just me?
“Can’t imagine him (Iorek) in a balloon though” - LMFAO
“It wasn’t just any balloon… it was a real beauty” - DAMN RIGHT IT WAS LEE
Is Will a little jealous of Lyra and Roger walking together and reminiscing or…???
“Hey, did I ever tell you about the crazy shaman who made me a bacon sandwich?” - OH MY GOD LEE 😂 (also it’s been a while since S2, but I think he’s talking about John Parry???)
Marisa really thinks she’s allowed to just leave 💀
Marisa telling Ogunwe that Lyra is dead, and him saying “Asriel didn’t tell me”, it hits hard because he has daughters of his own and I just know he’s probably confused because surely Asriel would have mentioned his own child dying but nOPE
Marisa yelling at the monkey to come and he just… doesn’t? He just walks away? Their dynamic is so interesting but in a messed up way
Will is looking for his father and he wants to be sure that his father will find his way out 😭
Lee realising that Will is the shaman’s son oh my GOD?!? And he thinks he has a way to summon him??? Oh I love Lee so much
“Are you sure about this?” - Stelmaria asking the only real questions
IOREK!!! 🐻‍❄️
IOREK STRAIGHT UP SMACKING ASRIEL DOWN WHEN HE APPROACHED LMFAO I LOVE HIM
Wait this is SVALBARD??? All the ice and snow has disappeared?!? And it’s all Asriel’s fault?!?
“My bears starve because you blew a hole in the sky!” - oh shit!
“Give me one reason why I shouldn’t KILL YOU!” “LYRA SILVERTONGUE!” “Why do you speak to me of her?” “You renamed her. You loved her. Tell me of her.” “She is everything you are not.” “Perhaps I should have known her better. But she is gone, and if you kill me now she will never be avenged.” — this whole exchange 😭 Iorek loves Lyra so much, Asriel saying he should have known her better (no shit, sir)…
“You do not understand. Lyra went to the Land of the Dead.” “The Land of the…?” “Yes. But she walked in the line.” “How did she enter that place?” “With the knife.” “The knife is broken.” “I fixed it. She went after her friend, Roger.” “… the kitchen boy.” “Another reason why I should kill you!” - IOREK GETS IT ASDFGHJKL HE’S A BETTER FATHER THAN ASRIEL EVER WAS FUCK ASRIEL WE ONLY LOVE IOREK AND LEE AS FATHER FIGURES NOW
Asriel laughing because “my daughter is staging a prison break” 💀
NOOO NOT LYRA FALLING INTO THE ENDLESS ABYSS
THE HARPY SAVING LYRA FROM FALLING INTO THE ABYSS HOLY SHIT
Marisa telling Serafina about torturing that witch in detail, Jesus CHRIST, she literally wants Serafina to kill her at this point :( but Serafina sees right through it of course
“If you won’t do it out of anger… then please just do it out of mercy.” - 😭 now why am I sympathising with Marisa
“Love… makes us fragile in ways we cannot fathom.” “I didn’t love Lyra. I wasn’t able to” - SURE you didn’t love her, Marisa 🙄
“Even my own dæmon rejects me” - yeah no can’t say I blame him honestly
Serafina talking about how she lost her son that she had with Farder Coram 😭 and how Lyra gave her hope
“When I first heard that prophecy, it terrified me. (…) Because I was always taught to believe that Eve was guilty of something shameful.” - yep, religion will do that to you!
“All Eve did was dare to experience - it’s an act of bravery. Of great beauty. You were a monster, but look what experience did to you… what love did. It changed you.” - oh my god the religion criticism is on point today holy crap
Will hugging Lyra and asking if she’s okay 😭❤️
Lyra wanting to give the harpy a name to thank it 😭
“Names can’t just be given!” “Mine was… by a friend.” - exactly, Lyra!
“Gracious-Wings.” — … Interesting name, Lyra but okay
“You can’t take it back now!” - I have NO intention to and neither does Lyra 😳
The harpies kinda do make me sad because like… they don’t have names. They’re frightening to look at. They live in the land of the dead. They’re trapped just as much as the ghosts are, and feared for how they look which probably contributes to their behaviour. So Lyra showing some kindness must be a brand new experience for them.
“You cannot tell the story of my name if you do not get out.” “… You like stories, don’t you? True ones.” - ohhhhhhhhh I get it! Awww, so Gracious-Wings wants Lyra to escape, not only because she’s been listening to her stories but also because Lyra can then tell the living about Gracious-Wings and the truth that she’s not so scary/completely evil, so maybe people when they die will be less afraid to meet her? Idk
“True stories are nourishing. They feed us, we had no idea there was anything but lies and wickedness.” “If those who follow behind tell you everything they saw in the world, everything true… could you guide them here so they could be set free?” - god I forgot how deep and clever this whole section was in the book
“Do not lie to me.” “I won’t.” - for once, I actually do believe she’s telling the truth
“Do we have a deal? The prisoners’ safe passage in exchange for their stories?” - YESSS OMG
“It’s alright, they’re going to help us! Just tell them your stories - stories from your lives, and they’ll guide you up. Tell them stories.” - nahhh I’m not crying you are 😭
Asriel telling Marisa Lyra is still alive but she doesn’t believe him at first 😭
“It makes sense: the Authority cows us with the threat of heaven or hell but even that was a lie, it’s all purgatory.”
“Please… my heart won’t take it.” - this woman has gone through so much, she’s not a good person but damn she’s gone through a lot
“You said yourself, she’s extraordinary… to free a soul from the Land of the Dead” - well you’ve changed your fucking tune
“The witches prophecy… they believe two things about Lyra: that she is Eve, and she will defeat Death. (Smiling/Laughing) That’s what she’s doing. The prophecy is right. We must help her, Asriel.” - ASRIEL AND MARISA ACTUALLY WORKING TOGETHER FOR REAL THIS TIME?!? Like actual parents?!? Who’d have thought 😭
“There’s someone here to see you.” - LEE BROUGHT JOHN PARRY TO WILL IM CRYING ALL OVER AGAIN ARE YOU SERIOUS
“I hate fighting. I’m not who you want me to be.” “No… no, you’re so much more.” - AND THEN THE HUG 🥹😭
“All this time, I thought that when we eventually found each other… we could go back to Oxford together.” “I did too.” - 😭😭😭 they deserve so much better, I can’t-
“If we get out of this awful place…” “We won’t be going the same way.” 😭
I’m sorry, okay, this whole episode is just one big CRYFEST AT THIS POINT
Lyra saying she thought Roger was braver than her 😭
“I don’t even know if I can do anything. I’m just so tired, and my chest…” “Because you’re away from your dæmon. Separation across worlds weakens your bond, Will. She’s pining for you.” “How do you know?” “I guided her to Asriel’s republic. As soon as you release these ghosts, you must cut through and find her, Will.” - KIRJAVA IS COMING WE’RE GOING TO MEET KIRJAVA ASDFGHJKL
“Don’t try to live in a world that’s not your own. No matter how tempting it may seem. You and your dæmon… you won’t survive it.” “But you did.” “No. I felt it, like an ache, every day. Don’t make the same mistake that I did. You deserve a full life with your mother.” 😭❤️ but also foreshadowing what will happen at the end of the series I feel unwell-
“What will happen to you?” “The same that will happen to every soul trapped down here: I’ll be free. I’ll be connected again to every living thing, thanks to you.” - Damn, right in the feels 😭
John telling Will he’s so proud of him and them hugging 😭❤️💔
Serafina saying she’s gonna send Kaisa to search for Pan because she knows that Pan can’t enter the Land of the Dead and so he’ll still be there, I’m so ready!!
“If it is true, and Lyra is going to free the dead, she and Will will have achieved something remarkable… far beyond your rebellion. Lyra is your focus now. Do not fail her.” — YESSSSSSS come on Asriel and Marisa, be good parents for once
WILL DID IT HE CUT A WINDOW OUT OF THE LAND OF THE DEAD AHHHH, and it’s opened out onto a beautiful paradise ❤️
“My dad said you’ll be free. You’ll drift apart, but you’ll be out in the open - connected with everything to love.” - 😭❤️
ROGER SAYING HE’LL GO FIRST ASDFGHJKL AND LYRA SAYING SHE’LL MISS HIM SO MUCH
“You’ll be okay. I know you will. You’ve saved your best friend. When you go back to Jordan, go to the roof for me.” - AND THE FOREHEAD TOUCH 😭❤️
“I’m ready” 😭😭😭 GOODBYE ROGER
AND THEN LEE SCORESBY HUGGING HER, “No need for that, it’s okay” because she’s crying, “thank you”, tipping his hat to Will
“I’m gonna be with my Hester” - SHUT THE FUCK UP RIGHT NOW 😭❤️
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I’m literally just full on sobbing at this point like my heart can’t take anymore at this point and there’s still TWO episodes left 😭
Marisa asking her monkey if she can sit with him?!? They’re so disconnected despite being the same person, I can’t-
“It hurts when we’re apart. I pretend that it doesn’t. That first time I sent you away… it was awful. I don’t know why I do it. At first I think it was curiosity… But now it’s become something else. A way to not feel what I can’t bear. I used to think that I was the strong one… but I was wrong. It was you. All along. I am so very sorry. Please… come back to me.” - NOOO WHY AM I HAVING EMOTIONS OVER MARISA AND THE DAMN DEMON GOLDEN MONKEY?!? AND THEM HOLDING HANDS?!?
Asriel and Marisa standing with their dæmons together… damn. Shit must be serious if the two of them are together on something
“The final rebellion has begun.” - OH SHIT HERE WE GOOOO
Episode 7: The Clouded Mountain
Two episodes left… 😬
Before we get into the episode, quick prediction: I feel like this episode is going to largely focus more on Asriel/Marisa and maybe bring that story to a close, and then the last one will be more Lyra/Will centric? Idk, we’ll see!
“We just have to keep Metatron’s forces away from the girl and the boy long enough for them to be reunited with their dæmons, to get to a safe world and… fall.” - oooooohhh
“How can you possibly know the nature of Metatron’s attack?” - LMFAO arguing like a married couple I see-
Okay, I was wrong, we are seeing Lyra and Will in this episode!
Will planning to get their dæmons himself and Lyra can wait in the nice world and he’ll meet her there 💀
“We’ve come this far and you still don’t understand: we’re in this together.” - 👏🏻
Every scene with Marisa and Asriel just seems like they’re flirting lmao
“I’ve given the girl nothing but at the very least I can buy her time” - 😭
“You’d do that for her?” “Not just her.” - THE WAY HE MOVED EVEN CLOSER TO HER ASDFGHJKL THEY ABOUT TO KISS OR SOMETHING
“Even if you get him to the abyss, you do understand it’s not just death down there? It’s eternal oblivia.” - DAMN, he’s committed I’ll give him that
“Your love for Lyra is your salvation and your downfall. When you think of her, I can read you as easily as a reflection in still water.” 😮
“Right, so we are doomed.” - Basically, yeah.
“Some of us will die today” - NOT A GREAT WAY TO OPEN AN INSPIRATIONAL SPEECH, ASRIEL 💀
Asriel is really on a mission to kill God in this series, that’s it summed up
“But thanks to my daughter, thanks to Lyra, we need no longer fear that fate! From today death is no longer an ending but a journey back into life!” - okay I take it back, his speech is pretty good
“Our children shall experience paradise but they will know it down here on the earth… today, we are free!” - YESSSSS 🙌🏻
OH SHIT is that Metatron’s soldiers/forces?!?
“I’m glad I said we didn’t have to win this fight” - LMAO
THE ANGEL KNEW LYRA AND WILL WERE CUTTING THROUGH AHHHH AND NOW ASRIEL’S ATTACKING LET’S GOOOO
It’s the way Lyra knew Pan and Will’s dæmon will be looking after each other 😭
“Metatron is releasing the dæmon eaters - he is turning all creatures against us” - AH HELL FUCKING NO
Are they the same as Spectres?!?
OH MY GOD OH MY GOD NO THIS IS MORE NIGHTMARE FUEL
YES MARISA DOING HER PART AND TRYING TO GET RID OF THEM BECAUSE SHE HAS CONTROL OVER THEM
“I’ve found Pantalaimon” - Oh my god YES give Pan back to me please
To be fair I don’t blame Will and Lyra for not immediately blindly trusting Ogunwe at this point, barely anyone is trustworthy in this series at this point
RED PANDA PAN
“They left us.” “I know. But they’ve come back for you.” - 😭❤️
AHHH KIRJAVA AND SHES A BEAUTIFUL CAT WHEN WE FIRST SEE HER AHHHHH
They can both still change but still AHHHHH SOON
“All I know is Asriel’s proud of you” - yeah, he just has a shit way of showing it
These noises are straight out a horror movie oh my GOD THE FUCK ARE THOSE THINGS THOSE GHAST-Y THINGS
Not Metatron (?) whispering into all of their heads asdfghjkl
Metatron telling Marisa she should join him and her and the monkey having this moment, “you know what to do” 😭 and he looks like he’s gonna follow her because he puts his paw on the bridge but he doesn’t 😭 can’t believe I’m having emotions have that goddamn demon monkey
ASRIEL CALLING FOR STELMARIA AND THEN MARISA INSIDE METATRON’S PALACE(?)/FORTRESS 😭
Can I just say that the visuals are STUNNING, oh my goodness I’m literally in awe of this imagery and the visuals it’s far better than 10 year old me imagined
Marisa saying that she loves Lyra and hates that she does 😭
Metatron taking on Asriel’s form so now we’ve got James McAvoy vs James McAvoy, truly Multiverse of Madness 💀
“No one cares for you.” “Marisa does.” - the way my jaw dropped, oh my
Not Asriel calling for Marisa 😭 no I will NOT ship them, I refuse-
“You care for her still? If only you knew the disdain in which she holds you. She’s giving you up.” “No… never… I love her.” - oh my god?!?!?
“She would never betray me…” “I can give you Asriel. He’s trying to protect her.” - NOOO DO NOT DO IT
HE KNEW SHE WAS CLOSE BY HE KNEW IT IM-
“Marisa, no…” - GIRL DO NOT DO IT I SWEAR
“Your dæmons are in the tower - cut them through to a safe world. I’ll find you wherever you are.” - I’m starting to remember how the book ends and my heart is hurting, it’s coming so soon…
“So… you did come.” - YES SHE DID PAN 😭 please forgive her
WILL SEEING KIRJAVA FOR THE FIRST TIME 😭❤️ and her going “… Will.” 🥹
“How could you bear it? Leaving me behind?” 😭
“We should be together. Please.” But the damage is done… if you’ve read TSC, you know 😭
What is that monkey doing? Is he helping them escape? HE PULLED THE LEVER ASDFGHJKL
“For Lyra.” 😭❤️
MARISA HELPING ASRIEL UP, ASRIEL AND MARISA GRAPPLING WITH METATRON TOGETHER, and then STELMARIA RUNNING AND JUMPING AND THEM ALL TUMBLING INTO THE ABYSS 😭😭😭💔💔💔 IT HAPPENED IT HAPPENED IVE BEEN WAITING YEARS-
The monkey and Lyra looking at each other 😭 and she knows, she knows her mother has helped them-
NOT STELMARIA FADING TO DUST 😭
LYRA AND THE MONKEY REACHING OUT FOR EACH OTHER AND HE STARTS FADING AWAY NO NO NO
NOT ME GETTING UPSET AND CRYING OVER THAT DAMN BASTARD GOBLIN POS MONKEY 😭😭😭
Lyra having to wipe her eyes 😭 same, me too-
I knew this episode would end the Asriel/Marisa/Metatron storyline, I just knew it
“Cloud’s gone. It’s all gone. The war’s over.” 🥺😭
I know we’ve still got an episode left but I’m already weeping because I’ve waited 15 years for this adaptation to come, to see this whole trilogy adapted right, and now it’s happened
Ogunwe seeing his daughters 🥹
“Can we go now? I wanna see Pan.” - YES 😭👏🏻
DAMN ONE EPISODE LEFT
Episode 8: The Botanic Garden
Just from the title alone I know this is going to cause me pain but let’s DO IT
Damn, they didn’t even do a recap on this episode (or at least my iPlayer didn’t?)
LAST TIME LETS GO WE DIE LIKE (WO)MEN
Lyra waking up and the first thing she asks for is Pan 🥺
Also Lyra going for a swim because she’s all dirty, don’t blame her quite frankly
“After everything we’ve been through and now we’re here… doesn’t seem real” - same
Lyra knows her mother is dead :(
“I should be relieved… there’s so many things I don’t understand about my parents (…) like why they weren’t honest with me. Why they did such horrible things. Why wasn’t she interested in me for 13 years and then suddenly she was… why did they abandon me?” 😭😭😭
Lyra saying she doesn’t hate Asriel but can’t forgive him, and “I have the strangest feeling he’s gone… which means I’m alone” 😭 and Will saying no she’s not ❤️
Will splashing her and then jumping in 😂
“What?” “Nothing… I’m just glad you washed” LMFAO
“She doesn’t look like she misses me. She seems fine.” - oh Pan :(
“Think how good it will be to be with them again. To be close.” - Kirjava ❤️
“What if it doesn’t feel the same? What if it never does?” “Lyra loves you. We’re finally in the same world, we’re safe here.” - 1) I’m sad because of TSC all over again and 2) I’m sad because I know how this ends
NOT FATHER GOMEZ I FORGOT ABOUT HIM ASDFGHJKL
No but where did the clean clothes come from???
“But there’s someone else we need to meet.” - IS IT MARY??
“I don’t feel torn apart, and I know he’s safe.” - 😭🥹
AHHH LYRA AND WILL SEEING THE MULEFA HERD AND BEING LIKE “they’re riding on wheels!”
I like that Will’s reaction to this new creature speaking a different language is just “… Hello :D”, I love him
MARY AND LYRA REUNION 😭❤️
Mary going “oh god look at you” because Lyra is so grown up 😭
Oh my gOD FATHER GOMEZ FUCK OFF ALREADY
I wanna squash his dæmon, I don’t care, I wanna squish it and murder it
Not him shooting and killing the local wildlife, fuck you dude
“They have less Sraf than you” - ahhh because they’re still teenagers and Mary is an adult, and Dust is what causes dæmons to settle/kids to become adults, I get it
“No pods, poor things” - XD
“I’ve been all over the place but I think this is my favourite world” - same, Lyra, same, it’s so peaceful
“How do you treat a tree with respect?” - quite easily I think, Will???
“We have the stupid idea as humans that we’re the pinnacle of evolution, but we’ve got so much wrong” — 👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻
“It’s the answer to the question to the question you asked me in Oxford - whether Dust is sin (…) it’s the spark that means we’re alive, it’s consciousness.” “So Dust isn’t sin… it’s just as good or bad as we are.” 👏🏻🥹
The trees dying is truly heartbreaking omg 😭💔
“It’s the Dust disappearing. It’s just flooding out of the world: thought, imagination, feeling all blowing away” 😭💔
There’s got to be a way of saving it, surely…? Like this world can’t just disappear??
“… So when Pan’s a wolverine, you know you’ve pissed her off” OMFG 💀🤣
“Like a nun-nun from our world?” Will omg 😅
“Mary, tell them stories” - YES PLEASE DO
Mary’s story oh my god
“And then I met someone… she wasn’t like the other academics” - LESBIAN MARY MALONE I REPEAT LESBIAN MARY MALONE
“Years ago when I was at school, those butterflies in the pit of my stomach, that ache to be close to someone… I think I had just been too afraid to recognise it before, but I didn’t want to forget it this time.” - AND THE SHOTS OF WILL AND LYRA AHHHHH
“I knew I couldn’t go back to the convent after that, I just couldn’t bear the idea of living without ever feeling that alive. And I thought… will anyone be better off if I just go back to the hotel and say my prayers, and promise to never fall into temptation again? And the answer came back… no. No one will. And I realised, there was no one there to reward me for being a good girl or no one there to punish me for being wicked. There was no one. And it was… it was liberating.” — the fact that Mary is Irish adds a whole other layer to it because of the whole “Irish Catholic guilt” thing, but also just in general… wow. Just wow.
“I wanted to experience love. (L: And did you?)… yeah. (W: Were you scared?) Oh my god, I was terrified. I was risking everything and I was sure I’d be rejected, but… it was worth it. It’s rare when it happens, when you feel that way you have to grab it. It’s funny, isn’t it? One little moment… all she did was offer me a sweet and it changed my life forever. For the first time I was doing something with all of my nature, not just a part of it.” — I CANNOT TAKE IT, THIS IS SO BEAUTIFUL
I can’t get over the looks between Lyra and Will, I knew it was happening obviously because of the books but stILL to actually see it onscreen???
“Where are you, Pan? There’s so many things I want to talk to you about.” 😭
Dear GOD DUDE FATHER GOMEZ GO AWAY IM SO DONE WITH YOU
Oh Mary totally knows something is going on between them even if they don’t yet
“What if she settles as something really bad, like… a mosquito or a slug or a fish?” “I heard of a man whose dæmon was a dolphin, but he’s a sailor so it’s fine” - I REMEMBER THAT STORY ABOUT THAT MAN FJDKDKDKD
Nooo not Gomez seeing them together I wanna punch him so bad-
“I don’t think anyone can understand… apart from you.” - oh my god Will 😭
“I think she’s… right… about a lot of things” - oh Will is NOT subtle in the slightest is he-
Lyra stepping closer, “yeah? What things?” ASDFGHJKL
“Dust… trees!” - smooth, Will, real fuckin smooth 🤣
Gomez was about to shoot Lyra while she was frolicking in the water but an Angel stopped him oh my god
ITS BALTHAMOS
“Desire is not sin. Love takes a million forms, each of them beautiful, each of them worthy. You who judge, just afraid.” 👏🏻
BALTHAMOS SQUASHED GOMEZ’S DÆMON, KILLED GOMEZ, AND THEN HE DIED TOO AND HIS LAST WORD WAS “BARUCH” 😭❤️
There’s something very innocent about these two teenagers clearly falling in love and sitting by the water in their underclothes and not realising why that would be seen as wrong because it’s so innocent and sweet and new 😭
WILL AND LYRA KISS I REPEAT WILL AND LYRA KISS I SCREAMED SO LOUD OH MY GOD
AND THE DUST SETTLING OVER THEM AND THE DUST RETURNING TO THE WORLD ASDFGHJKL THIS IS BEAUTIFUL
“The prophecy has been fulfilled. The love of Eve shall heal the earth and all the world shall feel it. Nature will be restored, hope will spark in darkness as innocence turns to experience, all will be in harmony once more.” - OH MY GOD AND THE SHOTS OF THE DIFFERENT WORLDS AND PLACES ASDFGHJKL
Those shy little smiles after they finished kissing omg
“Do you think Pan knows? I think he guessed” - he probably did let’s be real here lmfao
“I want to show you Jordan… proper Oxford. We can go to yours too… go to the cinema again.” - oh these kids are so hopeful 😭🥺
Pan and Kirjava!!!
“One who has given the world such a gift deserves a name… Kirjava.” — AHHHHH
Pan: Kirjava… suits you — 😭👏🏻❤️
“Why aren’t you with Will and Lyra? Are you still punishing them for their betrayal? But you love them still, don’t you? And you are not severed.” “No… we’re still one. But it was so painful.” - 🥺🥺🥺
“They will need you for what is to come” - OH BOY HERE WE GO
Pan and Kirjava coming back to their humans 😭❤️
“Pan…” “You left me. I’ve had to travel so far to find you again.” “I’m so sorry. I’m so grateful. I didn’t want to. I’m sorry. Please, I’m sorry. I missed you. I love you.” “Lyra…” AND THEN HE RUNS AND HUGS HER 😭
“I hoped you’d settle as a pine marten… suits you.” “I like it too.” 😭❤️
ALSO PAN SETTLED?!?!
“I’m… Kirjava.” WILL MEETING KIRJAVA PROPERLY
WILL AND LYRA TOUCHING EACH OTHER’S DÆMONS, THE MOST INTIMATE OF ACTS WHEN DONE CONSENSUALLY, I CANNOT COPE WITH THIS-
“Thanks to you, the multiverse is healing.” “I barely did anything.” “You showed two innocents what it was to dare, and by discovering their love, they have drawn Dust back into our worlds.” “Is that really all it took? Something so small and ordinary?” “Love is never small to those who discover it for the first time.” — brb, crying yet AGAIN over this series
“For centuries, Dust has been flowing out of the universe… what Lyra and Will have done has turned that tide. But their love alone is not enough to sustain it forever.” - oh no, no no no, it’s about to happen
“Every window that exists must be closed” - 😭😭😭 I know what’s coming and I hate it
“Each time the knife makes a cut, the flow of Dust increases and from the tear in the space between worlds some darkness is released, bring destruction across all of the worlds. It can take the form of many things: a plague, a spectre…” - 😭
But also does this mean that Covid was a result of the subtle knife??? 💀😳👀
“But if Will can’t use the knife, and if we can’t leave the windows open, then how will we…? We have to choose worlds, Will’s or mine?” “You can’t live in someone else’s world for long. Our dæmons wouldn’t survive. It means we can’t stay in the same world together.” - THERE IT IS 😭💔
“No! You can’t come here and just say that! After everything we’ve been through, it’s not fair! … it’s not fair…” 😭😭😭 they’ve literally just fallen in love and they have to separate already
Them walking away holding hands 😭
Oh nooo she’s already lost the ability to read the Alethiometer 😭😭😭
“It’s not broken, Lyra… you’ve changed. You’ve grown up.” “So… that’s it? I will never be able to read it again?” “The knowledge still exists but you’ll have to learn it, like those before you. You read it by Grace, and you can regain it by work.” “What’s the point? Why did we get here? Why did we go through everything we went through just to be forced apart?” — 😭
“I didn’t know it was possible to feel this bad.” “It won’t always feel like this.” “I don’t want to not feel like this about Lyra… I only want her.” - NOT WILL AND MARY’S COVERSATION IM TRYING TO HOLD IT TOGETHER SO BAD
“You know all those stories that say the greatest love is the one you can’t live without? The one that you’re prepared to die for? That’s not right. That’s not what love is. I know it seems romantic to die for love but it’s much more romantic to live for it.” — 😭💔
“You will never lose what you have with Will, you have shaped each other forever. And I know it doesn’t seem like it now, but you will have a future, Lyra” - and Lyra is just sitting there crying 😢 I hate it here-
“If humanity set their minds to discovery and their hearts to compassion, they may create enough Dust for a single opening to remain. But you already know where that window must be.” “The Land of the Dead.” “We can’t close that window, it’s the most important one.” — 😭💔
Will has to break the knife once they’re back in their own worlds 😭😭😭 and the angels will help close the windows
“There are fates even the most powerful have to submit to.” - 💔
“I love you. I’m not gonna stop loving you until the day I die.” “I love you.” - KILL ME. It would hurt FAR LESS
“We will come back here, when we’ve lived our lives, we’ll go through the Land of the Dead and we’ll tell Gracious-Wings everything we’ve done. We’ll find each other here. I’ll be drifting about until I find you.” “And I’ll be searching for you every moment. Every single moment.” “When we do find each other again… no one will be able to tear us apart. We’ll be joined so tightly… Every atom of me and every atom of you. When they use our atoms to make new lives, they’ll have to take two; one for you and one for me. We’ll be in the flowers and in the sunbeams… we’ll be joined so tight.” — okay no I’m full on sobbing and crying and shaking, I can’t cope with this, I can’t do anything but cry now
Lyra and Will embracing and holding each other, just clinging to each other on the floor as they cry 😭💔
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“Don’t forget us, Mary. Keep telling stories.” - 😭💔 this whole episode is just a massive HEARTBREAK I CANNOT-
We’re back to Lyra’s Oxford 😭
NOT THE BENCH, NOT THE FUCKING BENCH NO I ALMOST FORGOT ABOUT THE BENCH FUCK YOU PHILIP PULLMAN
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“You know you could see your dæmon too, if you wanted” - oh my god yes?!?! I KNEW she met her dæmon at some point, I knew I didn’t imagine it!
“There you are.” - AHHH HER DÆMON IS A BIRD
“We can come back here every year. You in your world and me in mine. Midsummer’s Day. Midday.” “And I’ll be there. I’ll be there every year, my whole life.” “And if we do meet someone we like, we must be kind to them - we won’t compare them. We’ll come here, just for an hour… we can be together.” “Every year. I promise.” - ASDFGHJKL THIS HURTS MY HEART IT HURTS
“Just do it!” 😭😭😭 she wants him to just do it because she knows it’s going to happen and hanging around prolonging it is just so much more painful
Lyra and Mary hugging goodbye 😭 “I’ll never forget you” - STOP
“I’ll break the knife as soon as I’m through because I’ll know I’ll just want to come back to you.” - THIS POST IS JUST ME SOBBING NOW EXCUSE ME-
“What is it?” “I’m just trying to imagine what you’ll look like when you’re older.” “Handsome of course.” “Very.” - EXCUSE ME
Will stepping through the window and going to close it, stopping and them then kissing 😭 “Lyra.” “Will.” AND THEN THEY KISS AND HE CLOSES THE WINDOW FUUUUUCK-
Lyra: *crying* // Me: BITCH ME TOO
“Just think of her” (to break the knife) - and it’s a series of flashbacks of her and him throughout the whole series I feel SICK-
The snow falling on Svalbard and Iorek 😭
Lyra’s back at Jordan College 😭❤️ but so much has changed
Will going back to his mum 😭💔 and then them hugging as Kirjava watches with a little smile I’m-
ONE YEAR LATER?!?! ONE YEAR LATER I’M-
She’s dressed like a student I’m-
ARE THEY GOING TO THE GARDEN?!?
“We can come back here every year. You in your world, me in mine. We can be together. I’ll be there every year. My whole life. I promise.”
THE FADES AS THEY GET OLDER AND WITH EACH YEAR, THE SPLIT SCREEN OF THEM AT OPPOSITE ENDS OF THE BENCH, THEM REACHING OUT TO HOLD EACH OTHER’S HANDS, WILL’S MISSING FINGERS
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“Lyra.” Being the last line of this show, oh my GOD.
THE ENDING TITLE CARDS
“Will and Lyra continued to return to their bench at the same time, every year. They kept their promise to each other, going on to live full lives in their own worlds. Will became a medical student and later, a successful surgeon. Lyra went on to be educated at St Sophia’s College in Oxford, where she was taught how to once again read the Alethiometer… Which would come in useful one day, when Lyra and Pan would go on to have a further great adventure. But that’s another story…”
THE BOOK OF DUST/THE SECRET COMMONWEALTH ADAPTATION CONFIRMED?!? IS THAT WHATS GOING ON?!?
Okay… wow… okay.
I’ll admit that in S1, I had issues with the show as a longtime fan of the books; perhaps I was too busy comparing it to the movie or whatever else, but also I had complaints about the lack of dæmons on-screen and how that really hurt the first series as a result (eg. The Billy Costa scene). Thankfully in S2 and S3, that issue was resolved and not a problem in the slightest, which I’m so glad for. I feel like for me personally, Subtle Knife (S2) and Amber Spyglass (S3) had the benefit of not having been adapted for the screen before (unlike Northern Lights/S1), so it was able to stand up as it’s own adaptation easier and not necessarily have the movie looming over it (if that makes sense). Because while I agree the movie was not great and didn’t do justice to the books, it was still an expensive blockbuster with hype and big names attached.
Right now I really want to reread TAS - I reread TSK when S2 was airing so it feels right to reread TAS now, but I’m reading Outlander still so I’ll have to put it off a few days 😭 - and also I want to take the trip to the Botanical Garden in Oxford where Lyra and Will meet every year. I don’t know if other fans do that but it’s something I’ve wanted to do a while, and now I want to do it more than ever. I’ll have to remind myself closer to the Midsummer’s Day to do it!
Honestly, I’m so emotional over this whole series. Was it a perfect adaptation? No, no adaptation is 100% accurate or perfect, things get changed or cut for whatever reason. But it was beautifully done, and I’m so unbelievably happy that it was finally done justice. I truly don’t think I could have asked for a better adaptation of a series that has meant so much to me for fifteen whole years. I’m so grateful that I live in a time where this series has been given the love and attention it deserves, and I can only hope that people viewing the show first have gone on to read Philip Pullman’s books, that it’s inspired them to read those too.
The cast have been spectacular throughout, especially the main cast members: Dafne Keen, Ruth Wilson, James McAvoy, Amir Wilson… gosh, all of them. And then of course the voice cast have been amazing too, especially Kit Connor as Pantalaimon since that’s literally the main voice role throughout this whole series. I’m just so blown away at this point, I can barely type it.
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uglypastels · 3 years ago
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Imagine eddie finds the reader (Steve's girlfriend) Passed out and he takes her too a room to take care of her and Steve enters the room And Basically after that eddie and steve fight over the reader but the reader picks steve because she loves him but talks sense into eddie and they becone friends?
thank you for the request!! i hope this is good heh
warnings: mention of heavy drinking, intoxication, mention of drugs. cursing.
Send Requests for Eddie // Steve!! and be sure to reblog and comment if you enjoyed reading this <3
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People had a lot of misconceptions about Eddie, one of them being that he was a huge party animal. Maybe it was the size of his hair or his stubborn and wild personality that he put up at school, but he wasn’t much into it. Sure, he enjoyed a beer with his friends, and his favourite place in the world was a grubby moshpit at a loud concert, but that was not the same as some dumb house party where the only thing to drink was either warm beer or mysterious punch and where no one even wanted him to be there in the first place. 
But he showed up for two reasons. It was still something to do on a lonely night, better than sitting alone in his uncle’s trailer. And two, it was a way to make a quick and easy buck. No one was easier to sell weed to than drunk teenagers. 
He walked around the house, chatting people up with a cup. Some people were interested, even bought something off him, but most scoffed and told him to fuck off (but Eddie knew they would be back in a few minutes. Suddenly, their interest peaked). 
‘Hey, you’re the weed guys, right?’ Someone tapped him on the shoulder, and Eddie turned around to meet the eyes of a beautiful girl. A beautiful… but a highly drunk girl. Her words were slurred, and the focus had left her eyes as she stood in front of him. 
‘Uhh, yeah,’ Eddie said hesitantly, ‘what I can help you with?’ 
‘Weed, obviously,’ she laughed. ‘You’re not the brightest cookie in the jar, are you?’ 
‘Heh, depends. I’m not sure you should have even more shit in your system, sweetheart.’ Eddie smiled at her but nervously started to look around. It didn’t seem like she was being supervised by anyone. No one was watching her while she was stumbling around and now trying to get into an even worse state. ‘Are you here with anyone?’ 
‘With my boyfriend,’ she rolled her eyes. ‘He’s… oh,’ she turned around, ready to point out her boyfriend to Eddie, but he was apparently nowhere to be seen, to her disappointment. 
‘Had a lot to drink, had we?’ He looked her up and down since she did not seem to be too stable on her feet. 
‘I don’t know, have we?’ She asked, giggling. Then Eddie noticed her holding a cup in her hand, the content splashing around as she moved. He gently took the cup from her and let the content scorch his nostrils basically when he breathed it in. 
‘Jesus H. Christ, what is in this stuff?’ He didn’t dare take a sip himself; instead, he put it on top of a shelf next to him. 
‘Don’t know,’ she shrugged. ‘But are you gonna sell me the stuff or not?’ 
‘I really think you’ve had enough. And should maybe get some rest, actually.’ He had to get this girl away from the alcohol before she would get seriously injured or something. So, keeping a safe distance, he led her upstairs. Of course, most rooms were already occupied by actual couples with different plans, but eventually, Eddie found a room for her to rest in. The bed was large and looked comfortable, and he helped her lie down. Almost as soon as her head hit the pillow, she fell asleep. 
Before leaving, Eddie went over to the bathroom to get her a glass of water to drink if she woke up. He had just come back from the en suite and was about to put the glass on the bedside table when the door swung open. The girl barely moved. 
‘What the hell do you think you’re doing, Munson?’ The one and only Steve Harrington walked through the door, his eyes filled with anger. 
‘Woah, Harrington. I’m not doing anything.’ Eddie put his hands up and took a big step back. ‘She was drunk as fuck so I brought her here to rest. That’s all. I brought her a glass of water and then I was going to leave. I didn’t even touch her, man.’ 
‘Get out.’ Steve was trying to keep his cool, but it was a close call once Eddie was passing him to not punch him in the jaw. Once the freak was gone, Steve closed the door and sat down on the ground in front of you. 
‘y/n?’ he whispered, and you murmured his name in return. ‘Are you ok?’
‘Let me sleep.’ 
‘Ok. Ok.’ He pulled the covers over you. ‘But did Eddie-’ 
‘Who is that?’ You were tired and didn’t want to answer Steve’s billion questions. 
‘The guy that just-’
‘Oh, he was nice.’ That was all you had to say on the matter before you fell asleep entirely. 
And the following day, you woke up with a giant headache and barely any memory of what had happened that night. The bed you were in felt and looked unfamiliar, and you would have panicked if it wasn’t for Steve’s limp body sleeping cramped up in a chair in the corner of the room. He snored lightly, and you would have thought it was cute if it wasn’t for the massive headache you were sporting. 
Your body was screaming for water, and to your surprise, a glass was left for you on the night table. How sweet of Steve to do that, you thought as you gulped it down. 
‘Hey, sleepyhead,’ Steve woke up not much later and called you. ‘How are you feeling?’ 
‘Like shit,’ you grumbled. ‘I’m never drinking again.’ 
‘Ok, sure.’ Steve laughed, not convinced by your plan. But still, he took care of you for the rest of the day. He got you some food and coffee and made sure to get you home without having to see your parents or their wrath about you getting wholly shitfaced and not coming back home. He spent the rest of the day with you in bed, cuddling and just talking; honestly, an almost perfect day if it wasn’t for that damn headache. 
— 
The next day, Monday, you got to school, and as you walked into O'Donnell's class, something in the classroom made you freeze, almost making the people behind you drop their things as you held up the passage. 
Looking out the window in the back of the room was someone you had never thought to have seen before. And yet, their dark hair seemed so familiar to you. And as if he knew you were staring at him, he turned around and looked directly at you. Not just looked. He smiled and waved. 
You had no idea what came over you, but you made a b-line to the seat closest to him. It surprised both of you.
‘Uhh, can I help you?’ he asked, clearly confused about your new presence. 
‘This will sound really bad on my part, but…’ you didn’t want to ask the question, but not knowing would make you feel even worse, ‘do I know you?’ 
He laughed, amused more than offended. 
‘I don’t know. Did you ever try to buy weed?’ 
‘What?!’ you looked at him with wide eyes. ‘No! Never.’ It was a mistake sitting down in that chair, but the room was quickly filling up, and there was no other place to go to. 
‘Ah, my bad then, I guess.’ He chuckled and started tapping his fingers on the wooden table. ‘Must have been some other girl dating Steve Harrington that tried to make a deal with me last Saturday just to pass out.’ The mention of your boyfriend and Saturday made you again look at him like a deer in the headlights. 
‘So it was you! You got me into bed last night.’ 
‘God, that makes me sound like a pervert. It’s enough your dear boyfriend already thinks that.’ 
‘What? Why?’ you asked. Steve hadn’t told you anything about… oh, god, you didn’t even know the name of this guy. 
‘He didn’t tell you? Well, after I…’ he laughed to himself, ‘“got you into bed” as you said yourself, Steve burst through the door like a lunatic. Honestly thought he would beat the shit out of me.’ 
‘Yeah, he has that crazy look sometimes. I’m sorry–’ And right at that time, the class started, and the conversation halted. But you couldn’t stop thinking about it. Not only about how embarrassed you felt about everything that happened at the party, but how you could have never seen the guy sitting next to you before. Uncontrollably, you kept stealing glances his way, most of which he caught. It kept going like that for the rest of the hour until the bell rang. 
‘Hey, uhm–’ you still didn’t know his name. 
‘Eddie,’ he filled in the gap for you, ‘no worries, I’m not offended that you don’t know me. Usually prefer it that way.’
‘Usually?’ 
‘There’s an exception for everything, isn’t there?’ He smiled before leaning down. Once back up straight, he showed you a pen– your pen– that you hadn’t even noticed you dropped. 
‘Oh my god, thank you.’ You took it and clipped it to the cover of your notebook. ‘So uhm, anyway, I just wanted to say “thank you” I suppose, for Saturday.’ You were now walking out of the classroom, side by side. 
‘No need, it really was no–’
‘y/n!’ Steve called from the other side of the busy hallway. People practically parted like the Red Sea for him as he made his way to you. He had a big smile on his face which quickly disappeared when he saw who was standing next to you. 
‘Munson?’ 
‘Harrington.’ It felt as if you had missed something significant happen just there, as they stood there, glaring at each other. 
‘What are you doing with my girlfriend, Munson?’ Steve’s jaw tightened. 
‘We were just talking Steve, calm down,’ You answered for Eddie, putting a hand on Steve’s arm. Usually, you could manage to keep his temper down, but it got a bit difficult at other times. Steve loved you; you knew that, but that wasn’t enough, apparently. Not to him. In his eyes, he didn’t feel like he was doing enough, so he overcompensated. He needed everyone else to know that you two were together and perfect. Ironically, that drove you crazy a little bit. 
This was one of the times when you couldn’t get Steve to calm down. His death glare was glued to Eddie, so instead, you did the same and directed your following words at your new acquaintance. 
‘Hey, I’m really sorry about this, but–’ 
‘Oh, yeah, no problem.’ Eddie was all ready to go. 
‘I’ll talk to you later, ok?’ 
‘If you can find me.’ maybe it wasn’t the wisest move to end the conversation with a wink, but Eddie did it anyway, and Steve almost threw himself at him from anger. You quickly pulled him in the opposite direction, away from where Eddie was going. Holding him by the sleeve, you pulled Steve to your locker. 
‘What the hell is wrong with you?’ you asked, actually in disbelief at how he was behaving. 
‘Nothing! I just…’
‘You just what?’ 
‘I don’t like him.’ He crossed his arms as if that was enough of an argument for anything. 
‘Don’t be childish, babe.’ you sighed, ‘look, Eddie is a really nice guy, and you know you got nothing to worry about, so I would really appreciate it if you just let me be friends with who I want to be friends with.’ 
‘Friends? You’re—’ he already saw the look you would give him and stopped himself. ‘Fine. Fine. But I’m not joining his weird role play club.’ 
‘What the hell are you talking about?’
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taylorkellyreporting · 3 years ago
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i hope no one minds if i liveblog this bitch: bridgerton season 2
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hitting play on this silly little show for kathony 😁
right just sat through the s1 recap and i’m deffo gonna need subtitles cos i can’t understand a word they’re saying 😭
LMAOOOO what is on her head
so redhead is basically gossip girl? why does she do it?
i already love anthony he’s hilarious
“do you read?” “books?” obviously 😭
well damn he has a nice body
DID HE PAY HER??$?$$4&($?&:&
wow doesn’t even have the courtesy to shut the door behind him
AURRRR GOD SHE’S GORGEOUS
just made eye contact for the first time alright people it’s fucking showtime let’s GO!
oh her smile is beautiful
edwina’s gorgeous too woah and their mom is so pretty that whole family is fine
NEWTON I LOVE HIM ALREADY OH HES SO 🥹
newton’s so fat 😭
kate’s a sarcastic shit and i love her
“this place may feel different, but it will never change the way you and i see each other.” this ages like milk
aurrr God i love kate and edwina’s relationship i am not ready for it to be ruined
those wigs are…🫢
kate is literally moving all over the room in order to keep watching anthony bitch GET UP
“wed, bed and bred” oh wow??????
anthony’s face 😭😭 he was not expecting her to go off on him like that i can’t breathe
“they escaped you? good for them 🙂” pls
eloise is def not played by a teen her voice is too damn old
my gawd kate loves edwina so much i’m crying
“i would rather DIE!” she’s a real one 😭
GOD i thought i’d never finish episode one
lmao kate really just embarrassed him in front of all those other men 😭
oh penelope is down bad
living for kathony’s banter
oh wow he really hired that guy to distract kate
one thing about anthony he’s gonna angrily rant about kate to his siblings
lmao she doesn’t even ride horses 😭
i’m sorry but i can’t seem to care about anything other than kathony
“write that down.” benedict looks so disappointed 😭
whew that scene between kate and lady danbury in her room…intense
HOLY SHIT THE BEGINNING OF EP THREE?????
NOT HER BEING DOWN WITH INCEST?!($)&(!:
he called kate a gatekeeper i can’t breathe 😭
kate looked so proud when newton barked at anthony lmfaooo
oh wow daphne thought kate was the one anthony was courting…even she can feel the tension
poor anthony he couldn’t even grieve his father
kate and anthony are serving in the enemies to lovers deparment
so far all this game is showing me is that edwina definitely doesn’t fit in with the bridgerton’s the way that kate does. she’s taken to their games v easily whereas edwina looks like she’d rather be anywhere else
“i knew i liked her.” oh kate’s gonna have that entire family wrapped around her finger just by keeping anthony on his toes 😭
oh colin shot those two balls that far on purpose!!!! he deffo ships it no i do not take constructive criticism
and the way daphne watches them? they all see the potential
my God this is the first time i’ve seen a full ass grin on anthony’s face…kate did that 😌
kathony laughing and smiling with each other…feels good feels organic
the flashbacks are so sad ☹️
edwina and anthony could’ve been cute if kathony’s chemistry wasn’t so strong
oh he feels everything daphne was describing just…with kate.
“edmund was the air that i breathed. and now there is no air.” oh my God
i just wanna give anthony the biggest hug
BENEDICT IS SO GONE 😭😭
oh daphne is the captain of the kathony ship
that had to be deeply embarrassing for edwina
if i were kate i would wanna kill anthony for making edwina cry and assume his failing to propose was her fault
benedict is so fucking funny
THE BEE SCENE????? JESUS CHRIST THEIR CHEMISTRY IS INSANE I FELT LIKE I WAS INTRUDING
they’re both losing their shit 😭
“i need your help getting him to fall in love with you.” oh she’s gonna regret saying that 😭😭
why is daphne’s husband never around? does he not fuck with her family?
God this scene is so awkward
damn anthony didn’t even let her get his entire name out of her mouth before immediately answering her he’s down so bad 😭
love kathony but this hunting shit ain’t it like i’m bored
anthony got one look at her thigh and lost all ability to function he’s so real
they’re so childish i love them
it’s about the ✨hands✨
GOD THEY GIVE ME SUCH A BUZZ
“you must keep doing whatever it is that you are doing.” she just keeps digging a bigger hole for herself 😭
oh fuck this scene for being in the middle of a storm now i can’t properly watch it
their dance???? the delena of it all
HIS REACTION TO HER SAYING SHE’S GOING BACK TO INDIA ONCE THEY’RE MARRIED OH I FEEL SICK
need them to stop being interrupted before they get to the good part
oh God. oh no.
daphne looks so proud of him cause she thinks he’s gonna follow his heart but i have no doubt that what he’s actually gonna do is propose to edwina
i never wanna see kate cry ever again
the way kate thought he wanted to speak with her my stomach
aurrr God i wanna hug kate so badly
edwina talking about her and anthony having kids and them + kate all being a family…i cannot even imagine how kate felt in that moment cause i feel like i was punched
my God the way kate flinched back a bit when he said marrying her was an unthinkable fate this is fucking sick like genuinely sick
and now she has to try on the ring what the fuck
oh he’s jealous i love it here
okay anthony is dead wrong for interfering with kate’s well…date. like dude you’re engaged to her sister??? that’s gotta be so confusing for her
not them falling into the water 😭😭
“it’s not proper to stare.” she says as she stares
shit that dinner scene was intense as hell had me holding my breath and everything
danbury told her to tell the truth in the ep 1 and she never did it 🫤
YOU ARE THE BANE OF MY EXISTENCE AND THE OBJECT OF ALL MY DESIRES ARE YOU FUCKIJG KIDDING ME?$)8)&;&:85
ANTHONY REALLY SAID HE’D THINK ABOUT BEING WITH KATE EVERY DAY OF HIS MARRIAGE TO EDWINA UNTIL HE FINALLY SNAPS AND CHEATS ON HER WITH KATE I CANT BREATHE
oh Jesus edwina loves him
the kathony scene in the woods…i can literally see him falling more and more in the love with her the more she talks
the fuck did the queen just inhale?!
“i fear that he does not look at me often enough.” that’s because he’s looking at your sister.
anthony’s so fucking bitter about this marriage 😭
also it just clicked that kate called anthony by his name for the first time i’m gonna cry
damn daphne went in on him
this is brutal
OH SHIT SHE FIGURED IT OUT
imagine finding out that your fiancé and your sister are having an emotional affair on your wedding day
their first kiss is going to be so satisfying
“half. sister.” Jesus christ.
FUCKING FINALLY
CANT BREATHE CANT MOVE CANT FUNCTION
oh poor edwina ☹️
God that smirk on anthony’s face when he and kate make eye contact fjgjgjfks
love that newton likes anthony now
not anthony sniffing the air as kate walked by oh my boy is down horrendous
the dance scene was too damn cute
not penelope betraying eloise oh wow?
i’ve stopped being able to function
just fucking in the middle of the garden like wow
her blood on his hands aurrr God
this anthony scene with his mom has me crying
penelope is a backstabbing bitch
edwina deserves everything good
this episode has me in a chokehold
the queen was the real mvp for stopping the rumors + mentioning to edwina that her nephew is a prince
HE PROPOSED AND SHE SAID YES!!!! I DONT KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO LOSE
daphne having a smug ass smile on her face when kathony is kissing on the field cos she knew there was something more between them since day one i love it here
this show is so good i might tune in to season one
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yee-fxcking-haw · 4 years ago
Text
•Love Me Tender•
Summary: After waiting, watching, and wanting, Tamaki finally has a way to get to you. He's willing to do use some questionable methods, make deals with shifty friends, whatever it takes. He'll have you.
Pairing: Pro Hero Tamaki Amajiki x FemReader (both 18+)
Warnings: Yandere behavior, stalking, coercion, sabotage, manipulation, hard dom Tamaki, slight brat reader, mostly sub reader, unprotected sex, virginity loss, oral sex (female receiving), tentacle play (oral, vaginal, anal, gagging), bondage (with tentacles), mild dumbification, degradation, spit play, cum play, wittle bit of bloodplay, creampie, marking, possession kink, collaring. Kinda-sorta dub-con (not really imo but warning just in case)
Word Count: 11,576
A/N: Jesus fucking christ I did it.
Part One: Porcelain Obsession
•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••
   Tamaki awoke painfully this morning, body aching and covered in dried sweat. It wasn't a feeling to be proud of, but it was a feeling he cherished. 
   Your stolen underwear is clutched in his hand still, like a lifeline. It still smells just a little bit like you… but not enough. He couldn't feel you or taste you or hold you. He had to figure something out, quickly. He had to find a way to make you his. 
   Luckily, Tamaki knows exactly how to make that happen…
***                                         
  You hang up your apron with a deep sigh, wiping sweat off your forehead with the back of your hand. Thank god it's only a half day, you finally have an afternoon off, a day to spend by yourself. 
   You bid your coworkers farewell and head out of the shop. You wander home, earbuds in as you try to drown out the noise of the city. Once you're home, you notice a small box on your doorstep. 
   It's a pretty little gold box with purple ribbon, a tiny note is attached to the top. The scribbled writing reads,
   "I thought this would look pretty on you, I'm sorry about the weird exit last night. I'd like to take you to get some coffee to make up for it, if you'll let me." - Tamaki
   Your heart flutters a bit at the note, you had deduced you were nothing more than a charity case. Him walking you home was just what he felt was fair in exchange for the use of your phone, he didn't really… like you? Did he? 
   His exit was just a little bit strange, he seemed almost panicked. You wanted to ask if everything was ok, but figure it best to stay out of a hero's business. Who knows what door you'd be opening if you started to ask too many questions.
   Beneath his note is a phone number, obviously his. You can't call him right away, it might seem desperate, but you can open the box. 
   When the lid comes off, you gasp quietly at what's hidden inside. On a delicate silver chain sits one lovely little pearl. You stand there, amazed and confused. Wondering why on earth somebody like Suneater would leave such a precious little gift for you. 
***
   You called the number left on the note about an hour after receiving it. As soon as Tamaki picks up the phone your heart leaps into your throat. 
   "I didn't think y-you'd call." He laughs afterwards, but you can hear traces of genuine anxiety underneath. 
   "Well, what kind of an asshole would I be if I didn't call back the hero that saved me from a lonely walk home?" Your face crinkles up at your horrid attempt at flirting. 
   He doesn't seem to mind, though. He gives you a sweet laugh, putting some of your nerves at ease. 
   "So, uh- coffee?" He wonders. 
   "I'd love to, I just got off work, but I imagine you're busy doing hero stuff. We can-"
   "No I'm not busy." He says quickly, his urgency makes you smile. He's almost boyish in his approach, and it's very charming. 
   Somehow, between the two of you suffering your way through the conversation, you set a time for coffee.
***
    Tamaki makes a quick stop before meeting you, visiting a horrid friend of his in an alleyway a hero should never be unless he's kicking someone's ass. 
   His "friend" turns out to be a little more than your average criminal. He's a wicked looking man, with a mess of black hair and an abundance of scarring littering his body. 
   They call him Dabi. 
   "So what's the plan here? Am I just scarin' the poor girl or do I get to have some real fun?" His smile is devilish, and his eyes are telling. 
   It makes Tamaki's skin crawl, he stares daggers at the man leaning against the brick of the alleyway. 
   "If you touch her, I will gut you like a fucking fish." Tamaki says, he's full of rage, but he says it so calmly, so matter of fact. 
   "You can try." Dabi laughs, "You forget how easy it is to cook seafood." 
   Tamaki stands there for a brief second, watching the villain, weighing his options. 
   "I'm not here for banter, can you do the job or not?" His words are clipped, strangely articulate compared to his usual stutter. 
   "Yeah whatever, I got nothin' planned for tonight, and I do love making little girls scream." He tilts his head back against the wall as Tamaki turns to stalk away. 
   "Hey, Suneater." Dabi calls out with a lazy voice. 
   Tamaki freezes and keeps his back to Dabi. He turns his head to the side and waits for him to speak. 
   "Send her my way when you're done with her." If Tamaki had less of the public eye on him, he would have slit Dabi's throat then and there. 
   Instead, he swallows his rage as he tosses a hefty wad of cash over his shoulder. 
   "Don't be late." 
***
   "You always just drink it black? Not even a little bit of sugar?' You ask, astounded by Tamaki's ability to drink the bitter liquid without any sweetener.
   "Sugar is kind of useless for me, I try to eat things that'll help me with m-my quirk." He explains, his deep eyes wander while he talks, like he's watching for something. 
   That must come with being a hero. 
   "Does coffee help your quirk?" You ask, a smile playing at your lips when you see him frown at his drink. 
   "No, but it helps me focus."
   You nod playfully before taking a sip, the cafe he's brought you to is incredibly charming. It's not an overly hip establishment, it's just a sweet little hidden gem. Tucked away into a forgotten street, it gives the impression that it's a well kept secret between two best friends. 
   "Do you feel like people ask too much of you?" You question. It slips out so quickly, running away from you after launching out of your lips. 
   Your hatred for small talk gets the best of you and you jump the gun, as always. You want to hide, but not before you apologise a thousand times for being too straightforward. 
   Tamaki looks at you thoughtfully, his eyes show that he's shocked, but not offended.
   "Sometimes. It can feel like people expect me t-to be the…" He pauses for a moment, mentally grasping for the right word. 
   "It feels like people expect Heroes to be this ultimate, universal band-aid. In a lot of ways, we are, but we're still h-human… I-I'm still human…" His voice slows down by the end of his sentence, like he's realized he might be over sharing. 
   But, you asked him, you wanted to know. You actually care about him? Every bone in his body is screaming at him to grab you, throw you over his shoulder and run away. He feels some carnal desire to just keep you. Hide you from every selfish asshole that would take advantage of the starstruck look in your beautiful eyes. 
   He can't, though… not yet. 
   "S-sorry…" He whispers. 
   And then, you reach across the table to take his hand in yours. He feels the contact all the up his arm, into his chest, into his heart. 
   So you do want him too. 
   "Please don't be sorry, I liked listening to you talk." You say quietly. 
   You did love it, you loved it because you've felt so unheard, so unseen. Being able to provide somebody else with a pair of listening ears serves as a kind of relief for those feelings. 
   "Can you tell me more?" You test, hand squeezing his own a little more. 
   He looks almost elated, thrilled to be seen, excited to be heard. Most of all, he's itching to finally have you. 
***
   The date was nothing short of wonderful, filled with cute little fumblings of words, hands brushing but never holding, and sharing bits and pieces of yourselves with each other. 
   You flop onto your bed, reminiscent of a teenager who's just had their first kiss. You didn't kiss him goodnight, you chickened out of that. But you did press your lips against his cheek for a brief moment, which seemed to have quite the effect on him. 
      His breath hitched, his fists balled at his sides, acting like he'd never been touched so tenderly. It made you wonder, is the Hero as lonely as you are? 
   You glance over at your night stand, seeing the pretty little necklace sitting in its box. You're washed with guilt as you realize you forgot to wear it to coffee, knowing he must have wanted you to. You take it out of the box carefully before pulling it around your neck and hooking it into place. It fits like a choker, snug against your skin, but it feels good to have it so close.
   You're ripped from your musing when you hear the unmistakable sound of breaking glass. 
   Inside your house. 
   Your blood chills, hair stands up on the back of your neck and you rise from your bed slowly. You try to talk yourself down, kill the first nerves that consume your chest. It was probably a poorly balanced vase… except, you don't own any vases. It could have been a picture? Nope, not a picture, it was just glass… like a window breaking. 
   There's a gun in your office, but you're in the bedroom. You scan the room for something, anything that could be used for defense. Of course, nothing but a damn notebook. 
   The police, you should call the police. Your heart clenches when you hear the threatening sound of heavy footsteps falling down your hallway. 
   They're heading straight for your bedroom. 
   You lunge at the door, hand landing on the doorknob just as it begins to turn. Desperately, uselessly, you try to lock it. It's too late, though, it's already opening by the time your thumb lands on the lock. 
   You can hear your blood rushing when the door swings towards you, a large black boot planted on the other side to force it open. 
   "Sorry 'bout the window, sweetheart. I tried the front door, but it was locked." The intruder chuckles as he invades your bedroom. 
   You stumble back as you take in his sewn together form, a mess of black leather and scars. Wild, electric blue eyes devour your trembling form as you press yourself back into the wall. 
   "Oh, hon, you're shakin' like you're in danger. I ain't gonna hurt you, I'm gonna do the opposite." He stalks towards you, somehow moving in slow motion but with incredible speed all at the same time. 
   Your phone sits on your night stand, only feet away but all too unreachable. You're caged in by his arms as he towers over you, filling your nose with some horrid, smokey smell. 
   "P-please, you can have anything, j-just don't-" 
   Your words halt when a long, pale finger traces over your collar bone. 
   "Don't what? 'J-just don't' what?" He mocks you, eyes lit with a sadistic amusement. 
   Your heart rattles in your chest as tears prick your eyes, you can't fight him, he's huge. You don't have your gun. You don't have your phone. You're fucked. 
   "Cryin' already? What's the matter, doll?-" The hand traces your collar bone moves up to wrap around your throat, "Not a fan of villains?" 
   Your hands paw at his wrist, you will yourself to sputter something out, any kind of objection to whatever he has planned. You try to whimper out a 'stop', but when your mouth finally forms the word, the voice isn't yours, but it's familiar.
   It's low, clipped and dangerous as it barks out the warning. 
   Suneater. 
   Suddenly, as if he's being yanked to the heavens by the Gods, your assailant is torn away from you. A large, red tentacle captures him by the waist and throws him across the room. You collapse to the ground instantly, curling around your legs as you hear the muffled sounds of a violent fight. 
   You hide in your own little world, trembling and clenching yourself. You take one peak from between your arms, just to see Tamaki place the intruder in a chokehold before barking some profane threat at him. 
   The villain is smiling the whole time, he even winks at you. 
   "If I ever see you near her again, you won't walk away with your life." Tamaki snarls as the stranger breaks away from his hold.  
   "She's not worth the trouble." He laughs, raising one hand before sending brilliant blue flames blasting towards Tamaki. 
   You scream involuntarily, reaching out for the Hero as he jumps away from the flames. Once they're gone, the villain is gone as well. Like some cheap magician disappearing off stage. The room is almost entirely untouched by the burst of fire, at most, the tip of your comforter is singed. 
   The second the fire is gone, Tamaki is walking towards you urgently, pulling you to your feet so he can cradle your face. 
   "Are you ok? Did he touch you? What happened?" His inky eyes search your face frantically. 
   You don't answer, you just stutter, clinging to his hands until you can finally squeak out, "I'm ok." 
   His shoulders drop as he sighs, hands loosening their grip. His eyes flicker down to the necklace, his gaze softens when he sees how pretty it looks on you. 
   "Y-you… Do you like it?" He asks timidly, glancing up at you. 
    You breathe for a moment, slightly taken aback by the sudden shift in attention. 
   "I love it." You say quietly, still trembling. 
   He just saved you, really saved you from a real villain who was planning God knows what, and he's worried about your necklace? 
   "It's so pr-pretty on you…" He reaches down to touch it, leaving one hand on your cheek. 
   You take the moment to breathe, remind yourself that you're safe, that you're with a hero now. You observe Tamaki's almost casual appearance, a dry fit shirt and simple tactical pants. It almost helps you relax, seeing him like so… at ease? 
   His fingers play with the pearl, deep eyes transfixed. Something nearly uncontrollable swells within his chest. It burns and aches and eats at him. You're so close, you're so warm, so soft. He could have you, he could just take you. 
   "Tamaki?" You prod gently, your own chest stirs, and something pulls you towards him.
   His eyes snap up to yours, and something shifts in the air. It feels sticky, heavy, too hard to breathe. His gorgeous form towers over you, pressing you back up against the wall as his eyes devour your trembling body. 
   "Thank you f-for saving me." You whisper.
   He nods earnestly, his breathing is shaking, his hands feel like they're holding back. 
   "Anything. Anything for you." 
   That line, that makes you ache.
   How long have you felt so lukewarm, so overlooked and forgotten? Too long, far too long. Now, with Tamaki looking down at you like you're priceless, you feel fiery, you feel seen and remembered. 
   Your hands grasp at his wrists, your eyes flick down to his parted lips. You're not sure what you want to happen next, but you want him as close as you can get him.
   "If you let me start, I will not stop." His voice drops and it makes your breath catch. 
   He feels it too, then. 
   Is it the high of what you've just gone through? Is it just your body trauma bonding with the man that just saved you? Or do you really, really want him so bad it hurts? 
   His tone is warning and his eyes are frantic. 
   "Please." Is the only thing that falls from your quivering lips. 
   Consequences be damned, motives especially be damned. You need him, and he needs you. That's enough explanation for tonight. 
   He consumes you much like the villains flames, his lips are on yours almost too fast, his hands are greedy as they hold your face to his. 
   While you feel similar to a lovesick girl getting kissed for the first time, Tamaki feels like a prisoner finally set free. He feels like a lion that was held in a cage and taunted with a piece of meat. He feels like the door has finally been opened, and he can finally sink his teeth in. 
   "I wanna feel you." He brings his mouth away from yours with much reluctance, leaving his forehead pressed against yours. 
   You flounder for a moment, with your mouth feeling dry and your limbs feeling heavy. 
   "Where?" You choke out, searching his face for any tell. 
   "God, everywhere." It's a broken request, said like a secret. 
   "Take it. Whatever you want." Your boldness surprises you both. 
   You're hooked on the exhilaration, you're craving more, you want to feel something. Even after just a walk home and a coffee date, you want to feel it with Tamaki. 
   "Don't give me that…" He shivers as he presses his body against yours, making it very evident how much of an affect you're having on him. 
   "I'll ruin you." He whimpers when you grind back against him, your hands tug at his shirt and you look up at him with wide eyes. 
   "Who said I don't want that?" 
   You both stand there frozen, waiting for the other to move, to prove that this isn't a dream. 
   "Fuck." 
   His hands descend from cradling your face so they can wrap around your neck with the most gentle grip. 
   He watches you intently, feels your breath quicken, cherishing the way you bite your lip when his fingers tighten slightly. 
   Internally, Tamaki is fighting the most challenging battle he's ever had to face. He's had to take on a wide variety of formidable enemies, but right now, nothing seems more formidable than having to hold himself back when he finally has you in his arms. 
   He wants to take and take and take, for as long as you'll let him… maybe even longer. 
   She's mine now.
   Something shifts in his gaze just then, making him look almost primal. It makes your chest feel frozen, makes it difficult to breathe or focus. 
   His hands shift around your neck, they feel almost… slippery? Their texture is different, their movement is more fluid. Then, you feel it, the distinct sensation of a suction cup latching against your skin. 
   Tentacles. He's made each of his fingers a tentacle.
   Your eyes stay locked on his, both of you in a heated trance as you watch how the other responds. 
   One slick tendril crawls up to latch onto your chin, he turns your head upwards and to the side with a thoughtful look. It's almost like he's sizing you up, appraising you. 
   After a thick moment of silence, he finally speaks. 
   "I'm going to make you cry." It's a depraved promise, beautifully whispered with no shame. 
   You stand there, held by him, captured by him. You're helplessly entranced, all rational thought is long gone as you reel over the implications of his statement. All you can know for sure, is you want more. 
    Despite every red flag, regardless of any common sense, you want more. 
   "I dare you." You say back to him, the desperation to feel anything other than mundane spurs you onward.
   He receives the words like it's a smack to the face, some shock evident in his eyes. He didn't take you for a brat, but he can certainly roll with it. 
   "You're gonna make this fun for me, aren't you?" He questions, his tentacles grip you tighter now, reminding you who has the high ground. 
   Mine. 
   The air shifts, something heavier takes over the mood, it settles in your ribs and wraps around your heart. 
   He guides you away from the wall, shepherding you around until your back is towards your bed. He starts walking you backwards until your knees buckle once they hit the mattress. 
   You sit there, gazing up at him, held still by his quirk, transfixed by the power he exudes as he towers over you. 
   "Has anyone ever had you before?" He asks, finally returning his hand to normal so he can cradle your cheek. 
   The question has your stomach burning with nerves. 
   No, nobody ever has. 
   You shake your head, looking down, cheeks burning as you try to hide your embarrassment. 
   His reaction shocks you immensely, his whole body shutters and he drops to his knees. His hands settle on your waist as he moves between your legs. 
   "Th-this is… all mine then?" He asks, he rubs his thumbs over the bottoms of your ribs affectionately. 
   His eyes are wide and reverent as he waits for your answer, looking like you're some anointed goddess. His eyes skate over every feature he can, and he cherishes each one. 
   Your confession nearly knocks the wind out of him, especially with how sweet you look, all blushing and embarrassed. It makes his need to rip you apart even stronger. 
   "Please...let me give you everything…" His hands tighten on you and you feel them shaking.
   You study him for a second, at a complete loss for words, he seems so… devoted. It pulls on your heart, clouds your mind and lights your body up. How could you possibly say no to him? How on earth could you turn someone away when they’re looking at you like you’re placed on an altar ready to be worshiped. 
   Carefully, like you’re trying not to frighten a beast, you reach out and touch his face. He moves into your touch like a lonely cat, desperate for affection and recognition. 
   “Please…” You breathe. 
   And that’s all it takes. 
   His breath leaves his lungs in a harsh rush as he moves forward like a leopard, lean and precise as he forces you onto your back. 
   Your blood rushes so quickly you swear you can hear it, your mouth goes dry as he stares you down. He’s suddenly less reverent, now he’s ravenous. A dangerous, carnivorous look dances in his dark eyes. His judgement is clouded just like yours, only it fuels him, while your state is much more terrified. Any spunk you had in you is thrown out the window as he leers over you.
   You shrink into the mattress as he hovers above you on all fours, heavy eyelids and parted lips giving him a nearly drugged look. 
   “When you say everything-” He whispers, moving so he can settle on his knees between your open legs, “Do you mean this too?” He drops his hips as he questions you, pressing something very hard into your thigh, something very intimidating. 
   He watches your eyes go wide, a wicked grin spreading across his face when you gasp after he rolls his hips. His arms cage you, a strong hand placed on either side of your head, the position makes you feel so pathetic, so helpless, but it gives you an incredible rush. 
   “Don’t look so scared, it won’t hurt.” He dips down to press his hot, open mouth against your neck, tongue lapping at your pulse. A dark chuckle leaves his chest, “Not much, at least.” 
   Then he’s definitely less reverent, he’s no longer worshipful, he’s a wicked, unleashed best. His hands are selfish as they remove your clothes, his mouth is voracious against your skin. He has you panting and twitching in seconds, musing at you when your reactions are particularly strong. 
   It’s when he snakes down your body, wetting your skin with his tongue, settling between your breasts so he can suck harshly at the heated skin, that you finally feel something break within you. You arch into his touch, fisting your hands in his raven hair, whimpering so beautifully for him as he works you up. 
   He knows what he’s doing, he’s skilled, well equipped for pulling you apart. He’s already descended into some debauched state of being, and he’s pulling you down with him. 
   “Nobody’s ever tasted this sweet little cunt before, have they?” He asks against your skin, latching his mouth back to the spot he’s focused on marking, but looking up at you with inquiring eyes. 
   You try to swallow, shake your head, do something, but all you can do is lay there naked and gasping.
   He laughs again, a wicked thing that leaves his chest like a wisp of wind. He slides a hand up your body, he flicks over your nipple with his thumb on the way up, pulling another whimper out of you. 
   His hand latches onto your jaw, then he shakes your head for you, doing what he knows you can’t. 
   “Oh baby…” He sighs, “You saved it for me?” He teases, hips grinding against you, the cloth of his pants creates a strange kind of friction against your clit, not unpleasant, but not pleasurable. Where the hell did the sweet, stuttering hero go? If you didn’t know any better, you’d say he looks deviant… almost villainous.
   “Tama- please.” You shiver, not sure what you’re asking for, but certain that you need more. 
   “Good girl, talk to me.” His hand slinks down your throat before he rises to his knees. 
   Your eyes lock on the tightness of his pants, trying not to panic at the sheer size of the imprint he’s making on them. 
   His shirt is pulled over his head, messing his hair in the most handsome way, and the breath is ripped from your lungs. 
   He’s stunning, broad and strong looking. He’s all porcelain skin over well trained muscle. Built perfectly for the work he does. Built perfectly for ripping apart poor little girls like you. 
   “I liked the look you got when I had my tentacles on you.” He sighs, letting a hand fall to your bare stomach so he can trace lazy circles against you. 
   “Did you like that? Do you want me to use my tentacles to play with you?” He questions. 
   His voice is low, it’s rich and warm and dripping with seduction. Nothing like the tentative, wobbly tone he usually has. It rips the ground out from underneath you, leaves you panting and blinking like a brain dead fool as you gawk up at his prowling form. 
   “Just a yes or no, if you can manage it.” He smiles sweetly up at you, splaying his hand across your quaking abdomen. 
   You breathe deeply, trying to steady yourself, trying to catch up with what he’s said. 
   “Y-yes.” You whisper, barely audible, hardly heard over your labored breathing. 
   His other hand mirrors the one he has on you, sliding around to hold you by the waist, a gentle cage meant to establish dominance. 
   “Yes… what?” He prompts, pressing his thumbs down. 
   You falter then, your tongue feels heavy, your mind slows and you’re suddenly void of all vocabulary. Were you really really about to let one of the most well known pros wreck your body with his quirk? Were you actually laid out for him like this? You know so little of him, your only information gathered from small talk, but something about that had you buzzing. 
   You could be whoever you want to be, you don’t have to be the floundering virgin. You don’t have to be so damn shell shocked. 
   “Yes, D-daddy.” You test, hoping to God or whoever is listening that you got the right name. 
   By the way his eyes flutter closed, the way his grip tightens, the way his body tenses, you sure as hell did. 
   “That’s it.” He sighs, “-and what about you?” He wonders, his hold going gentle again. 
   You? What about you? 
   Tamaki watches you carefully, barely containing the raging storm inside him, barely holding back the carnal urge to turn every limb to a pretty purple tentacle and stuff you until you’re crying for mercy. 
   Not yet, don’t fuck this up. 
   “Princess? Darling?” He asks, lowering himself back down to kiss down your stomach, looking up at you through his thick lashes. 
   “Whatever you want.” You answer. Your sweet, sacred submission makes him close his eyes and breathe in. 
   Hold it. Not. Yet.
   “You’re like an angel.” He breathes, making you shiver under the weight of the high praise. 
   He notices your reaction immediately, smiling to himself. 
   “So that’s it.” He presses a long kiss just under your belly button, bringing attention to how naked you are, and how naked he is not. 
   Your thighs squeeze together and your arms come up to cover your chest, suddenly overwhelmed by the urge to keep it all out of view. 
   His hands are on your wrist and his body is crouched over yours again before you can blink. He pins your hands beside your head, looking down at you with some wild, unbridled kind of look in his eyes. 
   “You do not get to hide from me.” His shoulders flex as he pushes your wrists down into the mattress, earning a whine from you as the pressure starts to ache. 
   “You’re mine. That means I get all of you.” He bites the words off, but keeps his voice quiet. 
   You should be scared, crying even, but the only thing you feel is exhilaration, the ache between your legs and the fluttering of your heart as he overpowers you with just the look in his eyes and a few harsh words. 
   “Do you understand me?” He eases up on your wrists slightly, looking more stern, less unhinged. 
   “I-I do, I’m sorry.” You whimper out. 
   He considers you for a brief second, eyes growing softer as he watches the way your pretty lip trembles. 
   “It’s ok.” He releases your wrists and speaks gently, “You’re ok.” 
   The reassurances makes you dizzy, especially in contrast with how rough he just was. 
   "Hold still for me, angel." Then he’s back to mouthing at your skin.
   His teeth meet your collarbone and your hands reach for his messy hair. 
   “There?” He asks against you, a smile in his voice as he lets his teeth gather your skin again. The spot he finds makes you dizzy, you feel the heat spread across your cheeks and the tips of your ears. 
   Tamaki is still stuck in his own chains, fighting against them as he focuses on the way you twitch for him, the way your body rolls when he bites harder. 
   So she likes it.
   Your body heats up, it's all so overwhelming. It's so different from anything you've ever felt, and you can't believe it's with him. 
    Then his kisses get more sloppy, his teeth are sharper against you. He leaves you shining with his spit, painted in blooming purple and red bruises as he begins his journey down your body. 
   "Da-addy." You sniffle when he bites into the underside of your breast. 
   It doesn't feel loving, it doesn't feel passionate, it just feels rough. 
   "Hush." He mumbles against you, "If you can't take this I might as well stop now." He looks up at you, challenging you. 
   "I can t-take it, I can." You breathe, nodding, looking at him with begging eyes, "Please, don't stop." 
   He honest to god growls against you. You couldn't possibly know what you do to him, how sweet your willingness sounds, how beautiful you look laid out for him. He knows he should take his time, and he resents that fact. He almost resents you for being so sweet and needy. With all the things he wants to do to you, he almost, almost, wishes you had at least some experience. This makes you his completely, though, and he wouldn’t trade that for anything. 
   His hot mouth moves lower and lower until he's tonguing at your hip bone, pulling the skin into his mouth so he can work his teeth against it. He will mark you wherever he can, as long as you'll let him. 
   Your hips roll up against him, making him smirk at how needy you're acting. 
   "Ask for it." He whispers, hungry hands slide up the outsides of your thighs, "Ask for what you want." 
   His fingers dig into the meat of your thighs, sending the breath from your lungs as he glares up at you. He lets his wet tongue loll out to give a teasing flick against the crux of your thigh. 
   You take a deep breath in and cling to the sheets for dear life, "Please, use your mouth on me." 
   He smiles so sweetly then, looking mildly amused. 
   "Here?" He goes back to that same spot, sucking and teasing, looking all too pleased with himself. 
   "Be specific, angel, tell me where you need me." 
   Tamaki knows for a fact that he didn't have to spend his time making you ask for things, he knows what you want, he knows how to give them to you. He could take whatever he needs, probably without much a fight from you, but what fun would that be? He would miss the pretty blush creeping across your skin, and the sweet little tears in your big eyes. No, he wouldn't be missing this, not for the world. 
    "I wanna feel your tongue, please, use your mouth on m-my cunt." You shiver, timid and uncertain about your phrasing. 
   It seems to do the trick though, because Tamaki's eyes nearly roll to the back of his head. 
   He answers with a low moan before grabbing you by the insides of your thighs so he can spread you open. Once the air of the room hits you, you're made painfully aware of just how soaked you are. 
   It makes Tamaki look like a wild man, all blown out pupils blushing cheeks. 
   Almost in slow motion, he presses his tongue into the spot right above your clit, making you whine and buck against his mouth. 
   "Needy little thing." He says, giving your thighs a gentle squeeze, "But I suppose I have teased enough." 
   Then he's on you, and the second his tongue meets your weak spot you know you're ruined. You know that not one person will ever hold a candle to Tamaki Amajiki. 
   He pulls away for only a second, just to whisper praises up to you, "Your cunt tastes like everything I've ever needed." 
   You huff at him in disbelief, not knowing what to say or do, heart soaring because of his confession.
   Then he dives back in, and he gets sloppy with it, setting a pace that feels so good it aches. The heat spreads through every limb, and settles somewhere deep in your chest. Everything tingles and burns, and breathing seems nearly impossible. 
   Internally, Tamaki is raging. He’s so close to losing it, he feels himself slipping, your taste spreads across his tongue is the culmination of months of watching and waiting and wanting. He wants to drown in you, he wants to rip you to shreds. No more watching you through windows, no more fucking his fist while he wishes with everything he has that it was your precious little pussy. He has you now, spread open and vulnerable. He knows he could shove your face into the pillows and let loose on you, stuff every hole with an invasive tentacle, the thought makes him even more feral, it makes him work even harder as he eats you. 
   Every roll of his tongue against your clit makes you throb and buck, which makes him growl and push you down against the mattress. He's loud and messy, slurping and moaning, letting it drip down his chin and his throat, never once letting up. 
   Your head is thrown back against the pillows, eyes drilled shut. You know damn well if you saw him, you wouldn't last another second. He builds you up until your thighs are trembling and you're a whiny little mess. 
   Perfect. 
   Suddenly, the texture of his tongue changes drastically. It's much more slippery, and much thicker. Your head shoots up, and you nearly sob at what you see. Tamaki, with his eyes wild and his jaw dropped, is letting a wicked looking tentacle hang from his mouth. 
   His quirk. 
   He smirks up at you as the tip of it writhes against your clit, flicking and circling as he watches the tears start to fall from your face. You can't possibly keep up, you didn't know anything could ever feel this good. 
   You watch the suction cups ripple as he moves the muscle against you, then he does the unthinkable. He latches one of them onto your clit. Your eyes cross and you bring a fist to your mouth so you can bite on it and muffle your screams. 
   He hates that. 
   With another rumbling growl, he lets his hands turn to tentacles as well. You watch helplessly as he snakes them up your arms, ripping your hand away from your mouth so he can pin both limbs to the bed. The tentacles are strong, surprisingly warm, and so damn slippery. 
   It's hard to tell if you're close to the edge, it's felt that way the whole time, everything feels so hot and tight and good. 
   He smiles as you cry out and thrash against the bed, full of admiration for the usefulness of his own quirk.
   “Too much! D-daddy, it’s too much.” You sniffle out as you feel a stinging feeling in your cunt, it’s not necessarily an unpleasant sting, but it’s too much.
   He ignores your objection, choosing to simply suck harder at your overstimulated sweet spot. He revels in your pitifully low threshold, planning to do so much worse to your poor, inexperienced body. 
   The ache in your cunt continues to push the tears from your eyes, and eventually, drool from your mouth. The suction cup works dutifully against your clit, making you feel so overwhelmed you don't know if you can cum. 
   Then you feel the prodding at your entrance. 
   Then you really scream. 
   Holding that one little suction cup to your clit, he snakes the tip of his tentacle into your dribbling hole. He furrows his dark brows and moans against you when he feels how tight you are, desperate to feel the velvety walls around his cock.
   "Holy fucking shit." You gasp. 
   He watches the dramatic rise and fall of your quaking chest, your baffled eyes trying to keep track of everything happening to your body, and he swears he falls even more in love. 
   You're so willing, so compliant, so at his mercy. 
   He crooks the tip of the tentacle towards himself just a bit, and it's like you've been struck by lightning. You cum hard, harder than you ever have. You're a mess of twitching limbs, shivering as your cunt clenches so hard your feel it in your fucking chest. You sob into the air, broken and tearful as he works you through it. 
   You feel the hold on your arms tighten as your body arches away from the mattress. As you feel every inch of you ignite, you know that you're ruined for everyone else. 
   As soon as you lower yourself so you're flat to the mattress, the tentacles around your arms slip away and turn back into his hands. 
   The one between your legs still plays with you a little bit, prodding at your clit, lapping up your mess. Tamaki laughs as you jump and twitch, whimpering and gasping as he milks your body for every after shock you can give him. 
   You watch him pull the tentacle back into his mouth, flicking it over his lips to gather your release before disappearing into his mouth. You watch his eyes flutter shut, you watch him shiver and you hear the sweetest little moan in the back of his throat. 
   “You’re pretty when you cry.” He mumbles, looking up at you with the most tender look in his eyes. It’s a harsh contrast with all the cum dripping down his chin. 
   “You move a lot, too. It’s fun.” He states, almost like some kind of twisted review, “I don’t mind holding you down like that.” 
   The drop in the tone of his voice makes a chill creep up your spine. 
   “In fact…” He lifts himself up so he can start to crawl up your body, “I really, really enjoyed it.”
   You gasp for words, wind stolen from your lungs as he presses his messy mouth against your sternum. 
   “Something tells me you did too.” He whispers. 
   Your voice is finally found, somewhere deep in your chest, hidden and nearly forgotten, “What makes you say that?” You ask timidly. 
   He pulls his head up to look down at you with a confident smirk, “The mess you made.” 
   To prove his point, he swipes two fingers through your folds, gathering your creamy release before holding it up to the light. He looks so damn proud, like he’s showing off. 
   “Messy girl.” He smiles, as you watch him bring his coated fingers to his lips, sucking the sin off with a greedy pop from his lips. 
   “Oh, how selfish of me.” He sighs before grabbing you by the chin, “I should share.” 
   He pulls your mouth open then slowly leans over you so he can push the mess back through his lips. You oblige like a robot, stunned by the debauchery, letting him guide you through this act. He lets it fall from his lips slowly, creating a long string from his mouth to yours. The second it hits your tongue, something clicks for you. Something dark and smokey settles in your gut, something all consuming and blinding. It rids you of boundaries and reservations, it fills you with nothing but the man in front of you. 
   He watches you with a pointed gaze, shutting your jaw for you so you can swallow what he gave you. 
   “What do you say?” He asks. 
   You feel the burn in your chest, the embers in your skin, “More, please.” 
   “Fucking hell," The words tumble out as a breath mostly, "You want more?" He questions, grabbing you by the wrist so he can place your palm just above the waist of his pants. 
   You nod up at him, vision blurred by the heat of his skin against your palm. 
   "Then take it." He leans down to say it, biting off the words. 
   A challenge. 
   You can't possibly disappoint him, you can't possibly leave him wanting. Take it? How are you supposed to take it? 
   In a wild moment of confidence, mostly your body moving without the permission of your mind, you wrap your legs around his lean hips so you can flip him onto his back. 
   Your eyes lock the second you feel him pressing against you, hard and thick, and terribly intimidating in length. 
 �� He watches you for a moment, then hastily grabs you by the back of the neck so he can pull you down for another kiss. It's hot and needy, full of wicked want and unabashed selfishness. It tickles your ribs, creeps up your neck, and secures itself greedily around all of your common sense. 
   Tamaki had no intentions of letting you take anything, it's a game to him. He'll let you have your moment, let you feel like you have the reigns, but he'll take it right back. His has you under control, he vows that he always will.
   Your chest flutters with a clawing, aching feeling. 
   More more more. 
   "Fuck me." It's a prayer, whimpered against his delicate lips, "Please, fuck me." You dig your hands into his hair, cherishing the sweet noises they leave him as you beg. 
   Under control.
   "Tell me you need it." He sighs, answering your prayer by sending his hands down to work urgently at his belt. 
   "Tell me you need me." 
   You bring your face back from his just enough to look into his dark eyes, and you see tears welling in them. 
   He needs to feel needed.
   "Please, I need it, I need you, Suneater." 
   Everything freezes for a brief second, the air thickens and his eyes darken as you wait with a held breath for his next move. 
   Then, everything is flying around you. You feel the bite of fingertips against your waist, your stomach hits the mattress, possibly the sound of his pants being taken off. Your senses are dulled by the raging swirl of emotions beating inside you as your hips are lifted up, and a hand shoves your face into the pillow. 
   "Who's your hero?" His voice is rough, his hand gathers your hair and cranks your head to the side, "Who is your fucking hero?" He's barking the words out now, harsh and demanding. 
   And holy hell does it get you going. 
   "You are! You're my hero, Suneater." You cry out, craning your neck to look at him. 
   You expected furrowed brows, a straight mouth and furious eyes. What you're met with is nothing of the sort. A soft pink blush across his cheeks and the tips of his pointed ears, tears wetting his cheek, and a quivering lip. 
   With your eyes on him, he makes a show of sliding his hand down his front so he can grab at his length. He lets it fall against your ass, heavy and painfully hard. 
   "Don't forget that." He says simply, sliding his thick head down through your slicked lips. 
   The contact makes you both shudder deep in your souls. 
   "Daddy, please." Your voice is pitiful as you fist the sheets and press back against him. 
   "So slutty." He muses, releasing your hair so he can run his nails down your back, "Poor thing, never been fucked, needs it so bad, doesn't she?" 
   You nod fervently and fuss as he presses his head against your tight hole. You tense and shiver, not at all prepared for what's to come. 
   "I need it, I need you, please please please." You have one thought now, no reservations, you need him. 
   "I'm gonna ruin this little cunt." He says, a warning tone in his voice. 
   The hand that was tracing your spine suddenly feels very cold and wet. 
   His damn quirk. 
   He takes his time, letting the thick tentacle slither around your waist. It wraps around you twice, teasing you with the pops of the suction cups, leaving pretty purple circles all over your abdomen. 
   He lifts you easily, pulling you up so your back is pressed against his chest. 
   "Ruin it, please, it's yours, I'm yours." You sniffle, looking down at your trapped position. 
   With a low, menacing growl, he sinks his teeth into your neck, and his cock into your heat. 
   Tamaki holds his breath, willing himself not to fill you up right this second. You're too damn tight, so warm and velvety. You're so perfect, and so completely his. 
   You sob into the air, hands reaching out to hold the headboard as you feel like you're being ripped apart. 
   "Oh don't scream, Angel, people might think something's wrong." His voice is shaking now, and the hold on your waist tightens. 
   You focus on relaxing, letting your walls lose their tension, but it's all fruitless. He's too big, he fills you too well, and all you can do is take it. 
   "Here, let me give that mouth something to do." 
   His other hand comes around to hold your throat, turning each finger into a tentacle again. It leaves you reeling and gasping as he presses further into you, wrapping what would be his middle finger around your throat. He wraps it around twice, like he did with your waist. The appendage comes up to rest its tip on your bottom lip. 
   The sensation makes you dizzy, especially when it finally snakes into your panting mouth. It doesn't really taste like anything, it just feels wet and slick, the texture of the suction cups is the strangest thing about it. He rocks his hips so gently, squeezing you tighter everywhere he's holding you. 
   You don't feel like a moth drawn to a flame, you feel like a moth caught in a spider's web. All tangled up, not willing to fight to escape, not even wanting to. 
   "You're so damn tight." He stutters out, pressing his hips flush against your own. 
   You cry out and gag against the tentacle stuffing your mouth, digging your nails into the headboard as he chuckles behind you. 
   "You're such a pretty little mess for me. Your cunt's already dripping." 
   You don't doubt it, it has to be with how badly your core aches around him as he stretches you. 
   Your thighs start to tremble as you wait for him to move, sniffling as the tears fall from your eyes and the drool spills from your lips. 
   A pretty little mess indeed. 
   Slowly, he drags his hips back with a hiss before pushing back in. He takes his time with it, building an agonizing pace that offers you no release. There's only the pressure, only your clit screaming for attention, only the maddening tease of his head against your sweet spot with every torturous push in. 
   "Fuck angel, I gotta break this pussy in, don't I?" His words pull another pitiful moan from you, nodding and whining is all you're capable of. 
   His picks up speed just enough to make you tense even more, still painful, still mind numbing. 
   "You look so fucking pretty on the end of my cock." 
   His words pour over you like hot wax, heating you up, making you drip. The heat seeps deep into your skin, making you squirm and clench. 
   He speeds his thrusting up slightly, then more, and more, and more, until you’re shrieking and choking against the tentacle stuffing your mouth. Your hands fly up to claw at it, wanting to tell him how it feels, wanting to thank him for the way he’s fucking you. 
   It’s still painful, each thrust splits you open with a sting, but it’s so damn good. The sharp stretching is absolutely spectacular, and it sends your brain into somewhere dark and smokey, it leaves you with a wide open feeling in your chest. It leaves you wanting more. 
   “What’s the matter, sweet thing?” He taunts, “Tell me about it, then, how’s Daddy make you feel?” He turns each tentacle back into a finger slowly, pulling out of your mouth, leaving you a gasping mess. 
   Through spit and tears, you praise him, words spewing out between moans as your body jolts from each punishing snap of his hips. 
   “So fucking good! You make me feel so good!” You cry, clinging to his forearm as he brings you closer to his chest. 
   The tentacle around your waist starts to slither down your stomach, “This isn’t even half of what I’m capable of doing to you,” The tip of it gives the hood of your clit a teasing flick, “-and you’re already such a slut for me.” His chuckle is dark and full as the tip of his skilled tentacle zeros in on your sweet spot, rubbing and wriggling against it until you’re screaming. 
   “Say it. Say you’re my little slut.” His words are a harsh demand against your ear, leaving no room for disobedience. 
   “I- f-fuck- I can’t! I ca-an’t!” You sob, not able to catch your breath between thrusts. 
   Tamaki eats that right up, swelling with pride as he fucks you speechless, delirious with the fact that he finally has your cunt gripping his cock. 
   Before he can bark another order at you, you finally pull the words out of your closing throat, "I'm your slut," You gasp as drool rolls down your chin, "I'm your little slut." 
   He throws his head back and throws everything he has into every thrust, his moans are obscene, high pitched and broken as he feels how hard you squeeze him when he speeds up the tip of his tentacle against your clit. 
   "Give it to me, I feel that greedy cunt tryin' to milk me, give me that fuckin cum." He huffs against your ear. Your entire body seizes up, shaking violently as ribbons of pleasure shoot through you. You pulse around Tamaki almost violently, earning some very rough sounding moans from him as he works you through it. 
   Your orgasm lasts for what feels like an eternity, you shiver with every throb of your walls. It possesses that same almost painful pleasure, and it's everything you've ever wanted. At some point, the tentacle around your waist turns to a hand, still absentmindedly rubbing you as you come down. 
   He lets your torso fall forward, leaving you bent over and exposed for him. His hands smooth over your ass, and you realize he's still so fucking hard. 
   "Can you take more, angel?"
   You nod against the tear soaked pillow you've pressed your face into, not sure that you even can, but willing to try. 
   "Good," He bends down to press kisses into your spine as he pulls out, "'Cause you're going to." 
   He pulls out, almost full of regret, wanting to live the rest of his life buried inside you.
   Now he can have some fun, mind cleared slightly by finally feeling you come undone around him. He's still hazy, still slightly frenzied, but less ravenous, less of a starved man waiting for his meal, more of a well fed man waiting for desert. 
   His hands hold your waist gently so he can guide you onto your back. You oblige, more than willing to let him have his way. 
   You finally get a good look at him, and you're astounded by just how pretty his dick looks. All pale and pink, swollen and shiny, it makes you dizzy with admiration. 
   "You're terribly beautiful." He whispers, cradling your waist so he can worship your stomach with soft kisses, "I don't believe you're even real." 
   Sweetness oozes through your tingling limbs, pouring over you like warm honey. His tender mouth brings you back down, soothes you into a state of catharsis. Your body settles, but your heart picks back up when his lips are on your hips. 
   Your eyes meet his, and you share the sentiment that he just might not be real. He pears up at you through a mess of indigo hair, eyes full of what you can only describe as devotion. 
   He explores your body with his hands, dipping his thumbs into every crook he can, palming handfuls of your plush thighs. He seems to have a soft spot for your hips though, pulling at your love handles, letting his breath speed up each time until he's panting against you. 
   With every pull of his hands, you bend for him, push into him, work with him. You both find a rhythm, falling into an easy dance of grabbing and needing. 
   "I want to keep you." He breathes, placing a hand on either side of your waist so he can lift himself over you, "I want to have you." 
   He gathers your legs while he speaks, hooking his hands under your knees so he can fold you up. 
   "You have me." You whisper, reaching out to lay your fingers on the sides of his ribs. 
   You watch his skin twitch under your touch, you watch his eyebrows sag into an almost heartbroken look. 
   He looks down between your bodies, quivering when he sees his heavy cock resting against your stomach. He feels so incredibly proud of you in that moment, for taking him so well, and asking for more. 
   She's mine. She said I have her. 
   The concept brings another wave of primal desire crashing down on his self control. 
   His fingers dig into your skin, biting at the flesh, spreading you open for him as he puts his weight on your legs. 
   You clench in anticipation, teased by the pressure of his hot length resting against you. 
   "I can take it." You say quietly, sliding your hands up his lean body so you can lace them into his inky hair. 
   He melts into your touch, stunned by your gorgeous submission. 
   "Fuck, angel." His words are shattered as they fall from his lips. 
   You reach down between your bodies and wrap your hand around his weeping tip. He trembles and hiccups as you push him down so he's lined up with where you need him. 
   "Please, I want all of it." m. 
   “Careful.” He pants, looking down at you with a warning in his eyes. 
   It doesn’t create hesitation in you though, only curiosity. 
   “We’re being careful now?” You tease, sliding him up and down your slit. 
   “You little devil.” He hisses, grabbing your wrist harshly, “You think you’re cute, don’t you?” 
   You freeze and blink up at him, once again shocked by his quick change in temperament. 
   “You wanna act like a tease now?” He questions, bringing your hand up so he can press it into the mattress with his. 
   “Did you find yourself a cute little attitude?” His voice drips with venom, it bites at your insides and melts your skin. 
   “That’s ok, angel.” He lets your hand go so he can press on the backs of your thighs again, successfully folding you completely in half, “I’ll fuck it out of you.” 
   Before you can breathe, blink, or respond, he’s splitting you open with a brutal pace. He laughs deep in his chest when you cry out, he mocks you when your hands fly to his abs in an attempt to slow his assault. A wicked smile spreads across his pretty face when tears stain your flushed cheeks once again. 
   “Cryin’ again so soon? Is it too much, baby? You need Daddy to slow down?” He’s testing you, only thrusting harder as he taunts you for your sobbing and moaning. 
   “No!” You gasp between tears, “Don’t stop, please, fuck me like that.” 
   “That’s my girl.” 
   His thrusts are ruthless, sharp, unforgiving. He rocks your body and the bed with each plunge in, headboard crashing against the wall. Each drive into you is enchanting, it teaches you something new, opens new doors, shows you a new, brilliant world of depravity. The way the pleasure shoots all the way up your spine with every drag of his cock, it’s something you want to feel until you die, you’d even be happy if this is the way you die. 
   You watch him disappear inside of you over and over, pulling out just as quick, covered in slick and sin. Tamaki is in his own feral world, watching your lovely face crumble and pout as he fills you. His hands are angry against the back of your thighs, nails digging in hard enough to bring little pearls of scarlet to the surface. 
   When you start to whine from the sting, he flashes you a lazy smile before stuffing his fingers into your mouth. He presses the blood covered fingertips into your tongue just enough to make drool spill from the sides of your mouth. 
   “Hush, you’ll learn to love it.”
   His smile turns wolfish when he watches your eyes roll back. It’s all so black-hearted, it’s everything you’ve kept yourself from, it’s everything you’ve ever wanted. 
   You both throb and cry then, your bodies smack as they meet, obscene and wet as you chase your undoing. Tamaki knows he’s not going to last much longer, and he curses himself for it. He doesn’t want to stop, especially when you wince so sweetly when his thrusts are a little too deep. He wants to watch you suck his fingers forever, crying against his palm as he turns you into his perfect little slut. 
   “You’re gonna give me one more, aren’t you, angel? You owe me that, I saved your life after all.” He slides his fingers from your mouth, dragging your spit down your chin before grabbing you by the throat, “Answer if you can, I know it must be hard to speak when you’re getting fucked this good.” 
   His words drown you in lust, your hands claw at his back, painting angry red lines down the pretty porcelain canvas, “Take it! Fuck- Take it, Suneater, take it all.” 
   It’s not a demand, it’s a plea, it’s a craving formed deep within your freshly corrupted heart. 
   Your begging pulls desperate, whiny sounds from him. With his eyes screwed shut he lets the hand on your thigh manifest the tentacles in place of his fingers. He throws all of his energy into that, trying to stall the twitching of his dick as your hot insides massage him with their relentless pulsing.   
   “Are you sure about that?” He tests, letting the tentacles snake around your thigh before slithering down to where your bodies meet. 
   Immediately, one starts flicking at your clit, making your back go rigid as he grins down at his good work. 
   You wail his name, nails biting at his skin even more but he pays no mind. He has a mission, he’s going to take all of it. 
   He focuses on making his tentacles grow, two long enough to reach up your body and tug at your nipples, and one other snaking down through the mess you’re making to prod at your asshole. Your eyes widen with shock as your body ignites, it’s too much, it’s all too much. Every sensation is heightened, every poke and flick and thrust sends shards of pleasure flying through you, piercing you from every direction. 
   You let yourself cry completely then, throwing your head against Tamaki’s collar bone before sobbing into his chest. You know you’re cumming, you can feel it somewhere amongst all the other stimulation, but it’s nearly drowned out, and Tamaki is still fucking you just as hard as he was when this all started. 
   “More, you have more for me, I fucking know it.” He huffs as he finally pushes into your ass with the tentacle. 
   The ones on your nipples latch on with their suction cups as he fills you more and more. 
   “Give it to me, angel, give it all to your hero.” 
   That’s the final push, the last thing you need to send you into the most frenzied orgasm you’ve ever experienced. Your vision goes white as your body convulses, ripped apart by the flames of euphoria that turn everything you’ve ever known to ash. Somewhere in the distance you hear Tamaki praising you, telling you how tight you feel, how beautiful you look, how good you are for him. 
   It’s lost in the fray, though, all blurring together as you shake violently around him. The only thing that brings you back slightly, is the break in his voice when he sobs, “I’m gonna stuff that little cunt with my cum, I’m gonna make you mine.”
   Your hand is at the back of his neck instantly, pulling him down for a messy, aimless kiss. His moans spill into your mouth as his hips falter, turning to slow, stuttering thrusts as he starts to pump his release deep into you. 
   “I’m yours - I’m yours I’m yours I’m yours.” You chant it against his lips as his tears fall to your cheeks, mixing with your own as you both shatter for each other.
   Coming back down isn't easy at all. It's slow and needy, your hands still pulling at whatever skin they can grab, hips rolling against each other, trying with everything you both have to prolong that rapturous feeling. 
   Frantically, painfully, he pulls himself out of you. He slides his hot mouth down your body, nipping and sucking as he descends to your messy cunt. He spreads your legs wide so he can bury his face between them. He teases your clit briefly, but moves quickly to press his open mouth against your hole.
   Your skin boils as you watch the nasty show. His eyes cross sinfully and flutter shut as he tongue at your well used pussy. When he pulls back, his chin is covered in some wretched mixture of your combined releases. He moves back up your body like an animal stalking its prey.
   He grabs your jaw and you open so willingly. His mouth is on yours instantly, pushing the warm liquid onto your tongue with his own. It’s a spunky, intense flavor, almost overwhelming as he spreads it around your mouth. It creates a dark, blurry feeling in your chest, though. It makes you feel alive, it makes you want more.
   He pulls back slowly, a thick string of saliva and sin connecting your lips as he pants down at you. 
   “You’re such a good little girl.” 
   His lips are everywhere, pressing against your cheekbones, your nose, your forehead. His hands return to normal so he can cradle your face. You both lay there, still joined, catching your breath. 
   "Angel?" 
   The tenderness in his voice pulls you back down to earth, and when you open your eyes, you find yourself lost in his. It’s a harsh but marvelous contrast with the sharp edges of his previous behavior.
   "Does anything h-hurt?" He asks timidly. 
   The stutter is back, the anxious look in his eyes, the restlessness in his hands. 
   You reach out to hold his face like he's holding yours, "Tamaki, no, nothing hurts. You made me feel so good." 
   You don't ever want to be a source of hesitation for him again. You want to make it better. He's brilliant, he's brave, he saved your damn life. He doesn't need to be so scared around you. 
   "You're my hero, Suneater." You pull him down for a soft, intimate kiss. 
   He breathes out against you, more of his tears wet your cheeks but you don't mind. 
   He's allowed to feel this, he earned this. 
   When the kiss breaks he searches your face, waiting for you to laugh at him, to push him off, to change your mind. 
   You don't, though. 
   You stay there with him, loving him and full of him. 
   "And you're mine." 
   You both settle there, kissing skin that hasn't been kissed before, finding ways to make each other fall even more. 
   Tamaki tells himself he did the right thing. You don't ever have to know why Dabi chose your house to break into. You don't ever need to be told that he spent endless nights watching you from the window, because he has you know. 
   It would be wrong of him to tell you, you wouldn't understand it. It would break your heart and ruin everything. Then, it would get messy. You might try to run away, and that would mean he'd have to keep you in different ways. 
   He shakes the thoughts from his head. He can keep you like this, laid out and blushing for him, so soft and beautiful. 
   You belong to him now, and that's all that there is. 
   "Can I take care of you?” He asks softly, playing with the necklace he gave you as he gives you a shy glance. 
   “You just did.” You let yourself laugh a little as you play with the hair at the nape of his neck. 
   “No, not like that.” He smiles softly, dipping down to kiss your neck so softly you almost can’t feel it, “Like this.” 
   He presses his lips against a mark you didn’t know he made, lingering for a moment as his eyes flutter shut. 
   “These say that you’re mine.” His thumb traces over one of the circular bruises on your ribs, “They say you have someone protecting you.”
   The prospect makes your heart soar. He’s right, belonging to him means you’ll always be safe, you’ll always have somebody willing to fight for you, maybe even somebody willing to stay with you. 
   “This says that you belong to me.” He loops a finger around the delicate pearl on your necklace, pulling gently, not enough to make you go anywhere, but enough to make you feel the metal tug against the back of your neck. 
   ‘You do belong to me, don’t you.” He asks, a wild, fearful look in his eyes. 
   You do, you just told him so, you just cried to him and vowed that you were his just moments ago. 
   “I do, I belong to you, I swear.” You reassure him, pulling a deep sigh from his chest. 
   You don’t understand the way he aches for you, the way he’s addicted to you. He was already hooked, from just glances and flighty touches. Now, having felt your soft skin, the tuck of your waist, having seen you cry and heard you call his name, he’s willing to admit his obsession. 
   He does take care of you, he does it beautifully. He carries you to the bathroom where he sets you on the edge of the tub. He fills it with warm, soapy water before picking you up bridal style so he can settle into the water with you in his lap. 
   Neither of you bother to turn a light on, content with the glow of the moon shining through the skylight. Tamaki paints your shoulders with soft kisses as he rubs soothing circles into your back. He takes his sweet time, wiping away the sweat and the tears, mindful of the tender spots on the back of your thighs. 
   “Beautiful, you’re so beautiful.” He sighs, “An angel, nothing less.” 
   You melt into him, lost in his praise, blinded by his devotion as well as your own. 
   Tamaki is just as lost, if not more, only becoming more possessive with every gentle touch, with every whispered adoration. 
   This is how it’s meant to be, and you don’t ever need to know how it all fell into place. He did the right thing, after all. This isn’t a problem, he’s in love. He’s in love and now he has you. 
   He intends on keeping it that way.
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queenshelby · 3 years ago
Text
Time for Change – Part Five
Pairing: Cillian Murphy x Reader
Warning: Smut
Words: 3,388
Notes: Not based on Cillian’s life. This is fiction guys! 
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The week following your night at the Westin with Cillian, you and Cillian caught up again, this time at a different hotel and without spending the entirety of the night together so that you wouldn’t raise any suspicions.
Then, the weekend after that, it was his birthday party and you and James were invited over to his and Danielle’s house to celebrate.
Chloe stayed with her grandmother and you were keen to see Cillian again. At the same time, you were nervous. It was the first time you were going to be around Danielle after you slept with Cillian and it certainly didn’t help that, despite your sense of clarity around everything, you were developing feelings for your brother-in-law.
The text messages between you and Cillian had become constant and not just sexual in nature. He called you daily when he could and you even met up on occasion, sometimes at the park when you both went for a run or sometimes at the local bookstore.
He was different to James. He had always been kind and you were interested in the same things. Occasionally, you would still teach the piano to his kids and he made sure that, every time you came over, Danielle wasn’t home.
When there was a chance, you kissed and held hands. You got to know him, even to the point where, when James bought Cillian a birthday present, you rolled your eyes, thinking that it was unsuitable.
‘He does not drink spirits James. Just shelf it and I will go to the bookstore and get something else for him, yeah?’ you chuckled and James looked at you somewhat confused.
‘You seem to know him well, your brother-in-law. I could almost be led to believe that you have a little crush on him’ James said, raising an eyebrow.
‘I ran into him a few times at the book store so I have an idea what he likes James. That’s all’ you explained, cheeks flushing.
‘Relax Y/N, I was just joking. I was thinking though, you know how Cillian had spoken about his holiday house down south the other time?’ James asked.
‘Yes, what about it?’ you asked.
‘Well, perhaps we can ask him for the key and get away for a weekend, just you and me. This might get you in the mood for some sexy time for a change’ James said, causing you to sigh.
‘James, we talked about this. I am just going through a few things’ you explained, not wanting to be with James in any intimate way knowing the big secret he was keeping from you.
‘It’s still about my affairs, isn’t it? You know, if you would have been more attentive as a wife and less occupied with Chloe’s needs and your job, I wouldn’t have had to cheat on you’ James said angrily, making it out to be your fault.
‘So, it’s my fault you fucked your secretary and knocked her up?’ you asked angrily.
‘How did you know?’ James wondered.
‘I just do James. It’s for another time to discuss. Not today. Today, I will pretend to be a happy wife and we will go to my step sister’s house for the party. Then tomorrow, we will talk about what we are going to do moving forward’ you suggested.
‘You know, this is all your fault Y/N. At least Laura gave me a child which is something you were incapable of doing. You didn’t want to fucking try going through IVF’ James then shouted angrily.
‘Because we didn’t have the money, James! And money is what keeps you here now, by my side, isn’t it? You don’t want to pay support for Chloe and me and you don’t want to miss out on my inheritance. Is that it? Because if you leave me, you don’t get anything’ you yelled at him as, suddenly, you had to reach for the corner of the kitchen bench as a wave of nausea washed through your body.
‘Chloe isn’t my daughter, nor is she yours. I have a daughter now and you can’t have children, which is probably for the better because, obviously, you are delusional and self-centred, blaming me for what happened instead of yourself’ James yelled, holding onto your shirt tightly and angrily.
‘Oh, I am self-centred?’ you barely managed to say before pushing his hand away and making your way to the downstairs bathroom rather quickly.
As soon as you walked through the door, you dropped to the floor and leaned over the toilet.
‘Jesus Christ’ you huffed as another bound of nausea overcame you and you emptied your breakfast into the toilet.
Just as you were in the bathroom, you heard the front door of the house close shut and you realised that James had left, which was probably for the better.
‘This fucking sushi place’ you growled to yourself, regretting your takeaway choice for the previous night before quickly brushing your teeth and making your way to the bookstore.
***
At around 7 o’clock that night, you arrived at Cillian’s and Danielle’s house without James by your side.
When Danielle enquired about James’s whereabout, you informed her that he would arrive a little later and so he did.
She could sense that you had been fighting and was quick to offer you a drink, which you gladly accepted.
After wishing Cillian a happy birthday and giving him his present, you socialised with Danielle and her friends and, every time you spoke to her, you felt guilty about what you were doing.
Yet, you couldn’t help but glance over towards Cillian on numerous occasions. He looked incredible and you loved seeing him smile.
Danielle, however, seemed unhappy and a mutual friend by the name Natalie eventually asked her what was wrong.
‘I think Cillian is seeing someone’ Danielle said quietly.
‘Oh god Jesus Danielle, not again, please’ Natalie said, being well aware of the constant allegations and fights they were having. ‘Just because you cheated doesn’t mean he did’ she then said, causing you to almost choke on your wine.
‘You did what?’ you asked surprised. This was the first you heard of it.
‘It was many years ago Y/N. Cillian knows and he forgave me. He was always away and I struggled with the kids and…’ Danielle went on to explain and you couldn’t stop yourself from laughing.
‘What is so funny? We all make mistakes’ she said and you couldn’t help but shake your head in disbelieve.
‘Well, apparently so’ you chuckled. ‘Now, what makes you think that he is cheating on you Danielle?’ you then asked, curious as to whether her suspicions were actually warranted and whether she knew something.
‘I looked at his bank account statement and there were two hotel charges in Dublin in the past two weeks, one for the Westin and one for the Hilton’ she explained.
‘He could have just eaten there with friends Danielle, both of these Hotels have restaurants attached to them and are conveniently located near Temple Bar’ Natalie then laughed, causing Danielle to nod.
‘Yeah, probably. But, he has been acting funny lately and isn’t interested in intimacy. He doesn’t even kiss me anymore’ Danielle said.
‘You walked out on him twice in two months Danielle. Does this seriously surprise you?’ you asked, causing Danielle to shake her head just as Cillian came walking over towards you.
‘Miss Music Teacher, do you mind helping me with this?’ Cillian asked you as he handed you a guitar with two broken strings.
‘What animal did this?’ you chuckled and Cillian looked over towards one of his friends, rolling his eyes as he did.
‘Right, show me where the string is and I will fix it’ you said and Cillian asked you to follow him downstairs which is where he kept all of the music instruments and accessories.
***
After you followed Cillian into the basement and he gave you quick kiss now that you had some privacy, you quickly locked the door behind you.
‘What are you doing?’ Cillian asked surprised and, without loosing any time, you moved towards him and pressed your lips onto his again for a more passionate kiss.
Your lips parted his, allowing your tongue to enter for a short moment and explore, before you broke off the kiss and moved back. You then brushed your finger over his lips in a silent hush as you started fumbling with his zipper.
‘I am giving you another birthday present’ you smirked and, whilst Cillian knew that this was wrong, especially with Danielle and James both upstairs, all he managed to do was exhale and watch as you pulled at his jeans and briefs and released him.
You gasped as his cock sprung straight up, precum already glistening on the tip.
‘Oh, I didn’t expect you to be hard already?’ you said with some excitement.
‘What can I say, I have been fantasising about you all evening, seeing you in these tight jeans’ Cillian whispered as your fingers wrapped around the shaft while your other hand cupped his balls and squeezed.
‘Have you now?’ you purred without looking away from his cock.
‘You are such a tease Y/N’ Cillian moaned as you started to stroke. Timidly at first but you quickly picked up the pace. You could tell Cillian was getting himself worked up and you knew you didn’t have much time as everyone was waiting upstairs.
Without warning, you leaned forward and took his shaft into the back of your throat, making him gasp.
‘Fuck’ Cillian groaned, no longer caring if anyone heard him. Your mouth around his cock just felt too good.
You moaned and hummed as you bobbed your head and the sound coming from your throat tickled his cock. He wasn't going to last long at this rate and he was holding back another groan as your tongue slid up and down the underside of his shaft rather seductively. Then, your lips were puckering on the tip of his cock, sucking like a vacuum before releasing him with an audible 'pop'.
‘You like that?’ you whispered, kissing the tip and looking up at Cillian with eyes full of lust but, his only reply was a nod as he ran his fingers through your hair.
The truth was that, he couldn’t remember the last time Danielle and him had sex, let alone her pleasuring him with her mouth. It wasn’t her thing and you certainly wouldn’t have pleasured James like this in recent years either. But, you couldn’t get enough of Cillian’s cock. He was just perfect and you enjoyed giving him the pleasure that he deserved.
‘You can fuck his face, I won't gag, remember?’ you eventually said with a wink, lowering your head again.
Cillian was somewhat surprised by your rather dirty request but found some reassurance when your hand came off his balls and found his hand in your hair, pushing downward, encouraging him to stop holding back.
Taking the hint, Cillian bunched your hair up in his fist and slammed his hips upward, bottoming out in your throat with a wet gurgle. You held there for a moment before pulling back with a gasp.
‘Again’ you moaned, excited by how he had his way with you and, just as you requested more, he forced your head back down on his cock.
‘Fuck Y/N, that’s it’ Cillian groaned, plunging his cock in and out of your plump lips over and over again now while your hand was back to squeezing his balls.
‘So fucking good’ Cillian groaned as he took from you what he needed and he couldn't hold on any longer. With one last violent thrust he held your head down and exploded, coating your throat with his seed.
Cillian could feel you swallowing as you moaned and squeezed his balls some more, milking him of every last drop before letting go off his cock and wiping your mouth.
‘Now give me the string for the guitar before anyone files a missing person’s report’ you winked as you stood up and Cillian zipped up his jeans.
***
When you came walking back upstairs, you noticed how drunk James was which didn’t surprise you after the fight you had earlier that day.
Tipsy and in a good mood, he walked over towards you and, just as you took a sip from your wine to flush down the remnants of what you had just done to Cillian in the basement, he took the glass out of your hand and gave you a kiss.
Cillian looked over to you, his eyes widening and chin dropping. He couldn’t help but laugh.
‘James, you are drunk’ you pointed out, pushing him off you quickly with some embarrassment.
‘I just wanted to kiss my wife, can’t I do that?’ James then said and Danielle quickly came over and handed James a glass of water.
‘You guys should stay the night, I think you can’t take him home in this condition’ Danielle suggested and, before you could decline, James agreed and accepted her offer.
‘Good, you can stay in the basement. It’s nice and warm and there is a comfy pull-out lounge and bathroom in case he gets sick’ she said and you thanked her for the offer.
Thankfully, the party didn’t last too much longer and, at around midnight, everyone had left and you made your way downstairs to see how James was coping.
Just as you walked down the last step, your phone buzzed and you received a text message from Cillian.
‘Meet me in the upstairs bathroom at 1am’ it said and you couldn’t help but giggle.
‘Okay xx’ you responded.
----------
The clock on the nightstand hit 1o’clock as you were laying on the pull-out lounge in Cillian’s basement studio with James snoring softly next to you. He had gone to sleep about half an hour ago after throwing up numerous times and you quietly made your way upstairs.
You opened the bathroom door where Cillian was already waiting for you and, without a word you met in an embrace, lips locking and tongues fighting one another in a sloppy kiss.
His chest was against yours as you backed your ass up against the vanity. His hands slid under your butt and you giggled as he lifted you off the ground, wrapping your legs around his waist and grinding your pelvis against his growing erection.
‘Are you going to fuck me?’ you whispered into his ear, your tongue tracing his ear lobe.
He answered with a nod and a groan against your neck, kissing a trail back up to your lips before pulling off your panties, which was the only thing other than a t-shirt which you were wearing.
Cillian then sat you on top of the vanity, facing him before pushing down his boxers.
Your lips never broke contact and, once he freed his cock, it sprang upward and slapped against the soaked mound between your legs.
‘Give it to me Cillian…I want you so fucking badly’ you moaned into his mouth as his hands slid up your t-shirt and cupped your breasts.
‘I've been thinking about having your cock inside of me all night’ you gasped between kisses, causing Cillian to groan.
‘Have you been thinking about fucking me too?’ you continued, your hips grinding against him, your pussy lips sliding along the length of his cock.
‘I have been. Every night, I have to go to the bathroom and make myself cum just thinking about you and how good you feel’ Cillian groaned as your hand snaked between you both and took hold of his girth, aiming it towards your dripping love hole.
‘Hmm, oh god Cillian’ you cried out as he took your cue and pushed himself into you slowly. Your body shook as you took him inch by inch.
‘Cillian, fuck’ you moaned again and almost screamed as your body convulsed against him and your back arched, fingernails digging into his chest through his t-shirt.
‘That was quick’ Cillian whispered and his hand immediately came down on your mouth, covering it as an orgasm swept through you within seconds of him entering you. This is how much you had craved him. You wanted to simply have him inside of you and were aching for him.
‘Holy shit’ you panted, pulling Cillian in for another deep kiss. While you were clawing at his chest again, he began to thrust in and out of you with short strokes and you began taking a little more each time until he hit your cervix.
Cillian could feel your pussy juices leaking onto his balls as he thrusted his hips and you moaned and shuttered as a second orgasm rolled through you after several minutes.
Cillian didn't slow this time and instead quickened his pace, thrusting into you relentlessly. Your hips were gyrating every time your bodies connected, making his cock do circles inside your pussy. It felt fucking magical and Cillian could feel his balls tightening as an orgasm approached, but he wasn't ready to finish.
‘Fuck, hold on, not yet’ he grunted, grabbing your hips and lifting you off the vanity before spinning you around.  
You grinned eagerly at this and leaned forward across the vanity, wiggling your apple shaped butt in anticipation as Cillian took position behind you. As Cillian rubbed his cock against your slit you arched your back and raised your ass to give him better access and he teased you with the tip, pushing in a couple of inches before pulling out completely  
‘Please Cillian, I need you to fuck me’ you begged and, just as you did, Cillian held your hips and slammed his cock all the way into you. Your bodies collided with a wet slap and you had to reach forward to brace yourself against the vanity.
‘Oh god yes fuck me Cillian’ you groaned, throwing your ass backwards to meet his thrusts while Cillian reached out and took a handful of your pony tail, pulling your head back as he pounded away. The way you would grind into the mirror in front of you every time Cillian bottomed out inside your drove him crazy and quickly brought back his orgasm.
‘Fuck Y/N, I'm gonna cum!’ he groaned.
‘Cum inside me’ you gasped, twisting to look back at him with lust filled eyes. ‘Fill my pussy and let me feel it’ you moaned.
‘Oh god, fuck Y/N’ Cillian groaned, grabbing your ass with two hands as he pulled you into him as his cock erupted inside you. He filled you with spurt after spurt of hot cum as you watched him in the mirror and wiggled your ass against him.
After he came down from his high, Cillian pulled out of you and spinned you around and once again sat you on top of the vanity before inspecting your cum dripping mound.
He stepped closer towards you and made you spread your legs wide before, without any warning, he slid two of his fingers inside you.
‘Oh shit Cillian right there! Oh fuck!’ you screamed as he pinched your g-spot. Within a minute or two of him stimulating your g-spot this way, your body quaked as one last orgasm passed through you.
Cillian held you in this position until you calmed down before pulling his fingers out with a wet slurp and brining them to your mouth.
You grinned and cleaned them up eagerly with your tongue and lips before kissing Cillian passionately, letting him taste the both of you.
‘That was...fucking amazing’ you said in between kisses and, just after your lips drifted apart, Cillian made an admission to you after a rather long and awkward pause.
‘I think that I am in love with you Y/N and I don’t know what to fucking do about it. This…all of it…it’s wrong. Yet, it’s like I can’t resist it. I need to be with you’ Cillian then said after he pulled up his boxers and let his head lean forward against your chest.
‘I feel exactly the same’ you said, causing Cillian to lift up his head and ask again.
‘So, what are we going to do about it, Y/N? We can’t go on like this’ he said and, just as he did, the bathroom door opened suddenly….
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theshelbyclan · 4 years ago
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The Young Nurse
Summary: When it turns out Finn is more ill than anyone suspected, you don’t know what to do, apart from being practical about it and taking care of him
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(Gif by @nofckingfighting​) A/N: The amazing @staygold-bebold​ send me her first request and I’m SO honoured: Hellooo there :) This is my first fic request *smiles shyly* I have this idea in my head for a while now... How about sick!Finn with reader taking care of him? I'm hoping for it to take place between seasons 2 and 3, so he is still soft. (before blinding the Changretta man in s4) Bonus if there can be an innocent cuddle in it! 😊 I love love love the way you portrayed Finn in your fics and how you never write too mushy fics even with fluff in it. Hope this is ok!You are such a wholesome sweetheart, I love this idea. Hope I did it justice! Finn’s fourteen in this one (so season 2) and the reader is of a similar age. Words: 2537
*** “I don’t feel so good…” “What?” you’d asked, but before Finn could answer, he’d fallen down and passed out already. 
At first, you had to laugh and you could hear others do the same. Everyone was down at the Garrison to celebrate and Finn had been sneaking whiskey all night. Tommy kept on taking it off of him, but John allowed it. Like it was really his first time drinking whiskey anyways… You were working at the bar. Officially, you were too young for the job, but your mother worked there and you occasionally helped out. Being only fourteen, you did work at the Garrison, but only during daytime, to clean. This is how you and Finn had met and he used to sit with you while you worked, watching and talking. He was a different boy away from his family. You never really talked much, it just wasn’t in your nature. But you could observe and deduce things that others failed to notice. For example, Finn was different with John. He was careful around Arthur, because he was the one to usually tell him to piss off. This annoyed Finn, as he desperately wanted to be seen as a man. With Tommy he was acting tough, trying to prove something, but never quite succeeding. But with John, he was just the little brother. John let him ride horses, let him drink and talked and played around with him. In all honesty, it seemed like Finn could make John forget all he’d seen and done, and allowed him to be a boy once again. So, it was John who’d given him the whiskey. When Finn fell down, you all laughed. Tommy took him back home and sighed deeply, “I fucking told you, didn’t I? And now I’m having to waste my fucking time on you, eh?” You’d seen many men fall down for the drink, but something didn’t feel right. Frowning but not speaking, you decided to keep an eye on your friend. ***
The next day, you went to Polly’s. She told you Finn was still in bed and that you couldn’t see him right now. “What’s wrong with him?” “Finn’s having his first ever hangover!” John called from the kitchen, grinning broadly. But Polly’s face showed some worry, “He’s puking his guts out, that’s for sure, and he can’t hold down any water. It’s the shortness of breath that’s worrying…” “Is he still drinking?” you asked at once. “What do you want with him?” John inquired, “Sit by his bed and hold his hand?” “Just wanted to see if he needs anything…” you mumbled. “Like his girlfriend maybe,” Arthur growled deeply. “I’m not his girlfriend!” you replied indignantly, but immediately you looked down again to hide your blushing. You’d never talked back to any other Shelby than Finn and it scared you. “Leave her alone, Arthur,” Tommy spoke from the shadows, “She’s a good girl, Y/N, sensible. She won’t do anything that isn’t proper or right, eh?” “Y/N,” Polly saved you, “Come back tomorrow. He needs to rest now.” And so you came back the next day, and the next, and the next, always being denied entrance into Finn’s bedroom. His chest pains had gotten worse and he had real trouble breathing now. You were tired of waiting. At home, you had started pacing for fear of the unknown. “What’s the matter with you?” your mother challenged, “You’re never like this. You’re supposed to be the calm one, I’m the agitated and loud one.” She was right. Sometimes you wondered if you and your mother were even related, because you couldn’t be more different. She worked at the bar, talking easily to all men and flirting always. You liked to hide in a corner and passed unnoticed. Your mother preferred the company during work, while you enjoyed the work in silence. Everyone knew your mother, but few even knew she had a kid. Your mother always complained how you were too boring, too practical, too silent, while you just whished for a mother to take care of you, not the other way around… All of this played out in your head, but you didn’t say a word. Then one night, it became too much to bear and you decided to do the bravest thing you had ever done in your short life. Silently, you crept out of your own bed and put on some clothes. While you were making your way out of the house, you saw your own reflection in the mirror, and you faltered. Strictly you said to yourself, “Y/N, stop being a baby. Do you want to go on the rest of your life not mattering to anyone? Finn needs you. Now man up, and go!” So you breathed in deeply and slipped out the front door. That was the easy part done, but now came the difficult part. Standing in front of the Shelby home, you cursed your own sudden courage but decided there was no going back now. Clattering up the drainpipe, you reached the roof of the houses at Watery Lane. Like a cat, without making a sound, you crawled towards the room in which Finn usually slept. Peering in, you saw he was alone: a stroke of luck. Getting the window to open was a lot easier than you’d feared. But what to do now that you were inside? You didn’t have much time to think it over, because Finn suddenly woke up and opened his eyes. “Y/N? What are you doing here?” You blushed again, “I wanted to see you,” you whispered. “How did you get in?” he said in a hushed voice. “I climbed the roof and came in through the window.” “Does Aunt Pol know?” “Obviously not, if I climbed the roof, silly!” you hissed. Finn frowned, “Is this a dream? It’s a dream, isn’t it… I’ve been having the weirdest dreams lately…” You quickly walked over to his bed and knelt down next to it, “I’m really here Finn.” “You climbed the roof,” Finn raised his eyebrows, “Y/N would never climb a roof. Without permission from Aunt Pol. In the middle of the night.” “Well, I did.” “In my dream you did.” “Finn!” you said, a little louder than anticipated, “It’s not a dream!” And you pinched him, “See?” “Ow!” he called out, “That hurt…” He actually looked a little betrayed and hurt, so you had difficulty in stopping yourself from laughing. You managed to hide it though, by taking a cloth from a washing basin and dabbing his head with it. He was burning up and worry took a hold of you. “Y/N?” Finn asked, “What are you doing?” “Taking care of you,” you said matter-of-factly. “Why?” “Well, I can’t imagine your brothers are doing much to help you,” annoyance slipped into your tone. “John’s scared,” Finn said softly, “We lost Martha and he doesn’t like people being ill after that. Tommy thinks it’s just the whiskey, maybe they all do. Arthur was never great with… anything really.” “What about Pol?” you asked, while taking his pulse with two fingers. Finn shrugged a little, “She’s got Michael now.” Full of sympathy, you looked at him. “I’m glad you’re here,” he smiled, “Got bored.” “Your pulse is fast,” you commented, “Have you been drinking enough?” But the two of you were rudely interrupted by someone barging into the room. Polly’s eyebrows rose, she looked like she was about to start yelling, but then motioned for you to follow her. Without a second thought, you obeyed. “Care to tell me what’s been going on?” she demanded once you were downstairs. You were officially scared of her, but answered, “He needs someone to look after him.” “Does he now?” “He’s seriously ill, Polly,” you said, but quickly followed it with, “Sorry, Miss Gray…” And for the second time, Tommy emerged from the shadows, “No need to stand on formal ceremony. How did you get into my house?” “Roof,” you practically trembled. “Jesus Christ…” Polly sighed, “Young love, that’s all we need…” “It’s not about that!” you called out, “He’s actually ailing! And he’s still vomiting after three days, he’s dehydrated, has difficulty breathing, a seriously high fever and his pulse is too fast. I don’t think it’s the whiskey, Mr. Shelby.”
“Not the whiskey, eh?” he slowly lit a cigarette, “Then what is your diagnosis?” “Influenza,” you said at once, “Saw my father die of it.” “And you checked his fever and pulse, you said?” Polly asked, in a much calmer voice now. “Yes, both elevated. He needs medicine,” you said in a practical manner, “I can see if I can get any Ginseng or elderberry, but I can’t get a hold of any other drugs.” “Surely it’s not that serious…” Polly objected. “It is,” you interrupted her, “he needs medicine fast and he needs fluids. He seems fine, but tonight might be critical.”
“Tell me, Y/N, how do you know all of this,” Tommy asked softly, seemingly unaffected by all of this. Again, you blushed, “I want to be a nurse.” “Makes sense,” Polly smirked a little. “I mean, I would like to…” you stumbled, “Can’t, but, I still want to help people…” Tommy understood at once, “If you can save Finn tonight, I’ll pay for your schooling. Now, tell me what I need to get.” Polly turned around and looked at her nephew with big eyes, asking, but not speaking out loud. He did reply however, “Y/N’s the most sensible person I know and she’s only fourteen, Pol. We’re not losing Finn. Let her take care of him.” For a moment, it looked like Polly was about to argue with him again, but then she closed her mouth. After a few seconds of silence, she asked, “What can I do?” “Do you have any green tea?” you grew shy at ordering a woman like Polly Gray about, “Green tea would be good for him…” “Tea,” she repeated and stood up to make some, “Anything else?” “Maybe you could send someone to my mother’s house, because I know she has the elderberry and Ginseng I mentioned.” “I’ll send John,” Tommy nodded and he told you, “Go sit with Finn. Let us know if anything changes.” Suddenly feeling numb, you walked up the stairs again. It was like this little conversation had only just made clear to you in how much danger Finn actually was. And it scared you, because Finn really was your only friend and you needed him. Sitting by his bed, he had lost consciousness again. It was as you had said: this night would be critical. Whenever he did wake a little, you tried pouring some of the green tea into him and luckily he kept it down. Still, his pulse was racing and his fever was blazing. Waiting and praying, you had no idea that downstairs Polly was doing the exact same thing. The next day went by uneventful. It seemed impossible to get him to drink enough, but you never stopped trying, mixing different drugs in with the liquids and teas, hoping it would be enough to save him. Every two hours or so, Tommy came walking up the stairs and when he came into the room, he only asked one question: “Has the danger passed?” You had to keep on disappointing him over and over. When Finn was awake, he ailed. ‘Awake’ was too liberal a term anyways, because you could no longer talk to him and his eyes wouldn’t focus. Sometimes he’d ask for you and when you talked to him and he recognised you voice, he became calm again and drifted off to sleep. “Y/N?” he once asked, “When I die, where will I go?” “Heaven, I suppose…” you muttered, “But you’re not dying, Finn, I won’t allow it. Now, drink this and rest.” “What do you mean, you won’t allow it?” “You’re young and you still have things to do!” you called out. “Like what?” he muttered, “Business? My brothers all think I’m just a kid… useless…” Angrily, you threw the wet cloth on his head again, “Well, I’d miss you. I need someone to talk to while I’m working and that’s you. Now, stop talking about dying.” “Okay,” he whispered, and drifted off again.
Another few hours passed and he wasn’t awake much. Was his fever going down, or were you just imagining it? Maybe it was wishful thinking…
The next time Finn woke up, he was complaining, “I’m cold. Is it cold? Because I’m really cold…”
And the concern was right back, because he was actually sleeping under five blankets already and even though it was Birmingham, it was in fact summer.
“Y/N,” he whined, “I’m really cold…”
“Sweetheart, I don’t know what else to do. Do you want some more tea?”
“That doesn’t help.”
So you decided quickly, “Okay, move. I’m going in.”
His eyes opened a little more in surprise, “In?”
“In the bed,” you clarified, “don’t get excited. I’m warm, boiling actually because of the fire, and I can warm you.”
So here you were, in bed with Finn Shelby. And for the first time, you felt your own pulse quickening.
Of course this was the moment that Tommy chose to check up on Finn again, taking half his family with him. They just stood there and stared.
“He was cold,” you explained meekly.
“Right,” Tommy said, smoking quietly.
“How is he?” Polly asked.
It’d been a few hours since you last checked and when you felt for his pulse, it appeared to have slowed down a little. Also, his head wasn’t feeling as hot as it had been before. He hadn’t vomited for a few hours now and when you looked at him, you saw he was wide awake, with a small smile of satisfaction playing around his lips.
“He doesn’t look unhappy,” John ventured.
“He has no bloody reason to be unhappy,” Arthur added with a grin.
“Tell me,” Tommy said simply.
And you sighed a sigh of relief, “The danger had passed.”
“Better thank your girlfriend, Finn!” John practically cheered.
“I’m not…” you sighed, but you didn’t have the energy to finish that sentence.
“Leave them be,” Polly said in a soft voice, “they both need to rest now.”
“I wouldn’t rest much with my girlfriend in bed…” John continued teasing.
You ground out, for what felt like the 20
th
time, “Not. His. Girlfriend.”
Finally, everyone left, which took some force on Polly’s part. You looked at Finn and noticed he was getting a bit of colour back into his cheeks already. He’d even complained about being hungry, which was surely a good sign.
“Y/N?” he asked.
“Yes,” you said softly, “what is it?”
“I have a question,” he tried to sit up, but you wouldn’t let him, “Thank you for taking care of me, but why?”
“You’re my friend,” you stated simply.
He shook his head, “No.”
“No?”
He didn’t respond for a while, but then repeated, “Y/N?”
“Yes?”
“Just ignore my brothers and whatever they’re saying.”
“They’re wrong,” you smiled, “They don’t even know us.”
“They don’t,” he confirmed and then he was silent for a few moments, fidgeting with the buttons of his pyjama’s.
“Y/N?”
“Finn?”
“I don’t want them to be wrong…”
“What do you mean?” you furrowed your brow while he stared at you with an expectant look.
“Will you be my girlfriend?”
***
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