#i love the energy devoting stuff to him gives me. its just so nice and energizing. 10/10 i appreciate him

[applefoam]

working on a devotional playlist for lord dionysus and having the time of my life

[beyondspaceandstars]

Take Me Away

Relationship: Wanda Maximoff x Reader Warnings: slight angst, eventual fluff Summary: Royalty!AU - You and your lady-in-waiting Wanda have been in a secret, forbidden relationship but everything gets tested when your father, the King, announces you are to be wed to a prince from a neighboring country. A/N: i’ve been loving royalty!au stuff lately and wanted to take my own stab at it. it’s not the most complicated, spectacular piece but i enjoyed writing it!

Masterlist

Wanda always arrived to your chambers right at the crack of dawn. Ever the punctual one, your lady-in-waiting never wasted a second once that bright light of a new day came through the windows. Sometimes she was even tasked with waking you up, ranting and raving about how your gown was going to take forever to lace up or that your hair wasn’t going to be dry enough to meet your family for breakfast.

Her frantic attitude always made you laugh. You thought her worrying heart was so silly and to show for it, you’d sometimes make it a point to shut her up with a kiss. One thing would lead to another until you two were lost among the silk sheets.

That all, though, had come to a stop today. Wanda was late this morning and you sadly knew why. Her heart must’ve been breaking, taking all her energy to pick up the pieces one by one this morning. You didn’t blame her, really, you felt the same break within you.

It had all fallen out last night. Your father, the usually benevolent King, had held a feast for your court and the royal family of a neighboring country. This wasn’t unusual for him as he very much loved to entertain. Everything had been going smooth. You were lost in the dancing and laughing with the patron, eagerly showing off the brand new dress your tailor had delivered that morning. You even got to sneak some cheeky glances at Wanda who stood off with the other servants, ready when needed.

Everything came to a screeching halt the second dinner had concluded. In between the refills of wine and arrival of dessert, your father had a surprise announcement to. It was as if a million bombs were going off. He revealed you were set to be married to the bordering country’s Prince. No one had told you, not even a hint from your mother, just this public declaration. You looked towards the king and his son — your soon-to-be-husband — and they were just beaming with joy. All plans and politics were falling into place for them while your world was crumbling.

You had excused yourself to the bathroom where you vomited profusely. Wanda, though, didn’t arrive to help. In fact, she didn’t arrive to your room for the rest of the night, sending one of the temporary servants instead.

You fell asleep feeling the loneliest you had felt in a long time. And those feelings certainly weren’t subsiding as you sat at your vanity the next morning, still waiting for Wanda.

You had been sitting alone for so long you thought she had abandoned her duties — or maybe she had just straight up retired last night and you were waiting on nothing — but then there was the unmistakable sound of your heavy door creaking open followed the gentle clicking of it closing. You peered into your looking glass, shifting it so slightly to show you the presence behind you.

"Wanda," you sighed, her naming falling from your lips as if it was the sweetest honey.

"Your Highness." While unsurprising, her cold and stoic response cut you. Your body tensed. Last time she had called you that was upon your very first meeting. Before she was the lover you kept in the shadows. Before there was ever a chance of losing her. The royal title felt like a death sentence now.

After a deep breath, you slowly placed the looking glass back on the table. You felt Wanda approach you from behind with caution. You didn’t know whether to turn around or ask her to begin her morning duties. If you were to be really honest with yourself, you just wanted to grab her and hold one another.

But Wanda seemed to have decided for the both of you. Hesitantly, she reached for the brush on the vanity and gently began on your hair. You wanted to cry.

"Wanda, please," you mumbled. "Talk to me."

"Talk to you?" She repeated, her fingers now running through your hair giving slight pulls as she fixed the curls. The actions reminded you of when she would… "And what would you like me to say?"

"Something, anything!" You were nearly crying, your words coming out in weak begs. "I didn’t know anything about it, you have to trust me on that. I—I don’t want… I could never—,"

"Never, what?" Wanda cut you off, the brushing motions in your hair suddenly halted. "You couldn’t possibly think we could ever be together fully. I’ll admit, I indulged in this fantasies but I’ve stopped. We weren’t meant to be and you sure weren’t meant to be a single princess forever." She cleared her throat. "This was bound to happen, I fear."

"No, no," you fought back, shaking your head insistently. Wanda placed a hand on your shoulder, trying to calm you down, but you only jumped at the touch, feeling that burning connection between you two. You couldn’t believe how much hold she had over you. How much you had over one another.

"Your Highness, I’m afraid—,"

"We can run away." The words slipped out of you so fast you never had a chance to bite your tongue. It felt like the world stopped, like you had created your own bomb to set off. Wanda’s grip on your shoulder got tighter. You straightened your posture, meaning business now despite the tears still flowing. You placed your hand atop of hers and continued, "I really think we could do it, dear. I can access the family funds, we could pack a few things, then be off in the night. Wouldn’t that just be nice? We could go wherever, start whatever life we want. You’re not wrong to say this was bound to happen but that doesn’t mean we can’t escape it."

"My Lady… There must be some consideration for the prince, the kingdoms, your subjects—,"

"They’re better to have no ruler than one who lives in constant agony."

The declaration was bold but it was the farthest from a lie. You decided to finally turn and face Wanda, your hand now holding hers with the greatest, most loving strength. The first thing you noticed were her eyes. They were so red and heavy, no doubt from hours of crying. Her hair was a mess as well, complimented by the worn down servants gown she wore. She hadn’t put any effort in today, probably dragging herself about as you predicted.

Slowly, you pressed a soft kiss to the back of her hand. Wanda let out a breathy gasp. When you met her eyes again, it appeared the deal had been sealed. But you needed her to say it.

"We can really do this, can’t we?" She asked shyly.

You nodded, a little grin playing at your lips. "I think we could go anywhere," you confirmed. "Maybe we can start a farm, raise some chickens or cows. Or — Oh! We could start a nice garden. I loved the one here but father wouldn’t let me learn how to care for it."

Wanda sighed as she watched you get lost in a new fantasy, one way beyond just being together but having a life. "Speaking of your father, he will send people after us, won’t he? The palace guards will die trying to find us if they have to."

You simply shrugged. Sure, she wasn’t wrong, but this was a big place and who knew what bigger places were out there. "Let them," you finally said. "We’ll be so far long gone before they realize it they won’t know what hit them."

Silence fell between you two.

"You’re going to give up all this for a chance for us to be together?" Wanda finally asked, motioning towards the gloriousness of the castle chamber. She was a very thorough one, extremely detailed-oriented, which made her the best partner-in-crime you had decided before ever engaging romantically. Eventually, it was one of the things that made you fall head over heals. She noticed everything, always the sweet and cool observer. You didn’t blame her for using the skill now.

"Wanda, dear," you sighed as your hand crept its way to her neck. "I’d give it all up a million times over to be with you."

Your sweet lover looked like she was now going to cry so you took the leap to lean up, catching her lips with yours. After a stunned moment, she returned the kiss, your lips moving in a familiar sync. It was electrifying knowing you hadn’t lost her. Knowing she was most likely going to be it for you, forever. Completely devoted to one another, comfortably and freely.

Wanda’s hand begin caressing your cheek when she pulled away slightly. Your foreheads were touching now but it still wasn’t close enough for you.

"Let’s do it," she whispered. "Take me away."

Words seemed so hard, something only the presence of Wanda could do to you. Unable to figure what was right to say now, of all times, you nodded and wrapped one arm around her waist. You pulled her into you, hugging her with all your might. She didn’t hesitate to return the embrace, soaking each other in.

"Of course, dear," you eventually said. Such small words they held the mysterious beginning and marked the glorious end.

[robininthelabyrinth]

NMJ is the only one that knows bc he’s the only one that NHS truly trusts, he’s the only one who knows why NHS focuses so much in painting and art, NHS doesn’t know why or how but with a little bit of spiritual energy he’s able to bring what he paints in paper to the real world and with that the Nie sect has the beasts of legends under their command

on ao3

“How about you draw a flower?” Nie Mingjue said without much conviction. It was hard to have conviction when you knew it was pointless.

“No!” Nie Huaisang shouted, unsurprisingly, because toddlers always shouted. They seemed to have a great deal of feelings and sound for such small frames. “Taotie!”

Nie Mingjue grimaced. “No, no, not Taotie,” he said quickly. Never Taotie, not again. “How about the Baihu? Nice fuzzy tiger?”

“No!”

“Fenghuang? You like birds.”

Nie Huaisang considered it. “I like birds,” he agreed.

Nie Mingjue heaved a sigh of relief. “Me, too,” he said enthusiastically. “I love birds.”

He had never had especially strong feelings about birds, but he was willing to develop some.

“Okay,” Nie Huaisang said, and patted his thigh comfortingly. “I’ll draw you a bird, da-ge.”

“…thanks,” Nie Mingjue said.

When Nie Huaisang was done, he proudly presented Nie Mingjue with the results of his work.

Nie Mingjue put the baby phoenix in the new aviary he’d secretly had constructed behind his father’s back, thinking to himself that the high-grade construction materials he’d insisted on were totally worth losing his allowance for the next year.

The phoenix chick - it looked like a plucked chicken with maybe three feathers total - weakly coughed smoke.

Because of course it did.

Sometimes Nie Mingjue wished that he could just tell someone about Nie Huaisang’s unusual gift – it was a pretty big burden to bear, and he really wasn’t sure he was old enough for this type of responsibility – but no one else deserved to know. If they didn’t have the good taste to like Nie Huaisang when he was no one and nobody, pointless and useless, they didn’t deserve the benefits of knowing him now that he could do stuff.

Even if it was weird stuff. 

Stuff like his ability to summoning the things he drew into existence. 

Even things that might not really exist.

Besides, the thought of Nie Huaisang getting wrapped up into war and politics when he was still so young –

No, better to just store away what he made and hope he grew out of it.

And no more Taoties.

-

“Lan Zhan said his uncle shows people his artwork,” Nie Huaisang said, sitting on Nie Mingjue’s table in the family study. “Why don’t you ever show my artwork?”

“You do art?” their father asked absently, most of his attention on the report he was reading.

“Huaisang does great calligraphy,” Nie Mingjue interjected very quickly. “You’ve seen it – it’s beautiful. And his poems are very well crafted, too.”

“But Lan Zhan said –”

Nie Mingjue mentally resigned himself to not being friends with Lan Xichen any longer, no matter how well they’d gotten along, on the basis that the other boy would probably take it personally when Nie Mingjue murdered his brother.

“He also said stuff about rules,” he said. “Hundreds and hundreds of rules. Do you want to listen to all of those, too?”

“No,” Nie Huaisang said sulkily, five years old and bitter with it. “But…”

“How about we show Lan Wangji your aviary?” Nie Mingjue coaxed. “Go ask him if he’d like to see it. I bet he’s never seen anything like that – and you can ask him what type of animal he likes best, too!”

Nie Huaisang’s eyes went wide at the thought and he dashed off.

“You spoil him far too much,” their father commented. “An aviary – you talk about it more than he does, and you’re always getting birds to fill it up for him, too. Why are you so devoted to him learning to like birds?”

“Better than him liking fierce beasts,” Nie Mingjue said, omitting to mention exactly where he obtained the birds that filled the aviary. “Or corpses.”

“If he liked fierce beasts, perhaps he’d be more martially inclined.”

No, we would be, Nie Mingjue thought. He’d gotten a lot of spare practice with Baxia trying to fight corpses that had no business being there during the period in which Nie Huaisang had gotten temporarily interested in the things in his father’s stories – and that was before Nie Huaisang had learned about yao.

“I don’t want him growing up morbid, that’s all,” he said.

“You’re his brother, not his nursemaid,” their father said, a little exasperated. “Nor are you his mother. Why are you fussing over him so?”

Nie Mingjue huffed and shook his head. “How goes recruitment for the border?” he asked instead, and listened to his father tell him about how people barely a year or two older than him were being sent to risk death in the name of sect honor.

Not Nie Huaisang, he promised himself. Not yet.

He’d tell his father when Nie Huaisang was old enough to handle the consequences.

-

“Huaisang, didi,” Nie Mingjue said, and tried to smile, even though it pained him. “Can you do me a favor? A really, really big favor?”

Nie Huaisang sniffed, clutching at his arms and shaking. “What, da-ge?”

“You remember Jiwei? A-die’s saber? Can you draw that for me, please?”

It only made it worse.

-

“Da-ge?”

“Yes, Huaisang?” Nie Mingjue asked, scowling at the map. It didn’t get any better the longer he looked at it, but maybe if he kept glaring he could cow it into submission.

“Don’t you want me to help?”

Nie Mingjue looked up at where Nie Huaisang was wringing his hands by the door. “Help? With what?”

Nie Huaisang rolled his eyes at him, like it was Nie Mingjue being dense instead of him having started a conversation in the middle. “Uh, with border defense?”

“Why would I ask you to help with that?” Nie Mingjue asked blankly, then realized how his words could be misconstrued. “Not that I wouldn’t ask you to help, of course, but you’ve never really liked battlefield strategy, and anyway you are only twelve –”

“Da-ge!” Nie Huaisang whined. “I meant drawing!”

“…as in maps?”

Nie Huaisang’s glare could light fires.

Nie Mingjue coughed and put aside his work to focus on his brother. “Huaisang, why do you think I would use your drawings in planning out a possible battle?”

“Because they’re useful?” Nie Huaisang said, crossing his arms. “I can make things appear, da-ge, just by drawing them. Not sure if you’ve noticed, but that’s not something that normal people can do.”

“I know,” Nie Mingjue said. “It’s not. But just because it’s not normal doesn’t mean it’s not a wonderful ability, Huaisang.”

Nie Huaisang looked a little bit appeased.

“But just because it’s wonderful doesn’t mean I’m going to abuse your ability,” Nie Mingjue continued. “You should be playing, not working, and if anyone tells you otherwise, you tell me and I’ll straighten them out.”

Nie Huaisang came up and hugged him. “So it’s not that you’re not ashamed of me being weird and useless?”

“I think we’ve already established that an ability like yours is far from useless. And I don’t care how weird you are, principles are principles: you’re too young to be used for battle. Sorry, Huaisang; my hands are tied.”

Nie Huaisang laughed at him and left, looking much happier.

-

“So what would you like?” Nie Huaisang asked, eyes sparkling. “Me and my brush are at the ready, here to help!”

Nie Mingjue rubbed his forehead. “If you’re sure…”

“Da-ge! I’m seventeen – you were already sect leader for two years by my age. And it’s not like I’m going out there on the front lines or anything; I’m just going to draw some stuff for you.”

“You say ‘just’,” he grumbled. “It does drain your qi, you know. That’s why you took such a long time to form a golden core…”

“Yes, but I did get there eventually, didn’t I? And anyway, it’s fine, I’ll do it instead of my usual landscapes. What would you like? A dragon to devour our enemies? The white tiger, nipping at their heels? A taotie –”

“No Taotie.”

“You’re so weird about that,” Nie Huaisang complained, rolling his eyes again. “Fine. Then what?”

“Sabers,” Nie Mingjue said, giving in. “Standard steel, not spiritual. Horses, feed, saddles. Say, how are you at drawing arrows?”

“Da-ge,” Nie Huaisang said. “I can draw you the beasts of legend, and you want me to draw you arrows?”

“Yes. As many as you can bring yourself to create, really; everyone’s always short on arrows. More rice would be good, too –”

“This wasn’t exactly what I was expecting when I volunteered to help,” Nie Huaisang grumbled.

“Are you going to do it for me or not?” Nie Mingjue asked, unimpressed. “You asked me to use you, not to give you an art project.��

His brother heaved a sigh. “Yes, yes, I will. Can you explain to me why this is your choice, at least?”

Nie Mingjue ruffled his brother’s hair. “Huaisang, when you draw something, it comes to life. Fully to life, as a separate and independent creature of its own – if you draw a dragon, who’s to say that the dragon will choose to fight the Wen sect, instead of turning on us? It wouldn’t be much help if we had to run out, sabers drawn, to deal with whatever it was, only to be exhausted before the Wen sect even arrived.”

“…oh.”

“When we’ve made some progress in the field, I promise to let you help build fortifications,” Nie Mingjue said. “You can start thinking of really nasty traps –”

“Da-ge?”

“Yes?”

“…is that why you hate the idea of me drawing Taotie so much?”

Nie Mingjue coughed.

“Da-ge!”

“Don’t worry about it. It was always really good saber practice…”

-

“And if anyone tries anything against you at the camp, you draw something really mean, okay?” Nie Mingjue said, pressing paper and a brush into his brother’s hand in addition to the ones he’d hidden away in his luggage - there was a chance that might be confiscated upon his arrival. “I don’t care what it is.”

“I know, I know –”

“Promise me!”

“I will!” Nie Huaisang exclaimed. “I promise already!”

“Not just if they’re aggressive. Even if things just look suspicious –”

“Suspicious? Like what?”

“If they take you somewhere secluded,” Nie Mingjue said, face drawn with worry. “Somewhere where it’d take us a long time to find your bodies. I don’t care if you put other people in danger from your creation, okay? Don’t make me have to find your corpse.”

Nie Huaisang was silent for a moment. “I understand,” he finally said. “I promise.”

-

“I’m never drawing anything legendary ever again,” Nie Huaisang sniffed into Nie Mingjue’s collar. “That Xuanwu was awful. It tried to eat all of us!”

-

“Do you want me to help with the logistics, Sect Leader Nie?” Meng Yao asked.

“You already help with the logistics,” Nie Mingjue said, not really paying attention. If it was serious, Meng Yao would bring it to his attention – he was a truly remarkable aide-de-camp. “You already help with everything.”

“I appreciate Sect Leader Nie’s confidence in me,” Meng Yao said, smiling a little. “But no, I meant – with the imports.”

“Imports?”

“Every week we receive new shipments of goods – food, weapons, defenses – from Qinghe, and we don’t send any money back. Surely such expenditures are putting a strain on the Nie treasury..?”

“Oh, don’t worry about that,” Nie Mingjue said. “Huaisang is handling it. It’s good for him to have responsibility.”

Meng Yao looked a little skeptical, but in his defense, he’d met Nie Huaisang.

“Really,” Nie Mingjue assured him. “He’s not going to hurt our budget – it’ll be fine. They’ve come steadily every week so far, haven’t they?”

“If Sect Leader Nie is content, then so am I,” Meng Yao said, but he was pouting a little, perhaps at the perceived lack of trust. He did so love to be helpful.

“You know I trust you with my life,” Nie Mingjue told him. “But this is something that Huaisang is, for once, best placed to handle. Don’t worry about it.”

It wasn’t really his secret to share, after all. Maybe when the war was done.

-

Nie Mingjue was on his back in the throne room of the Fire Palace, staring up at the man who murdered his father and who was about to murder him, too, when he heard the sound.

A high-pitched squeal, unlike anything else he’d ever heard – a little like a pig, a little like a wolf, a little like the long slow grate of metal against metal. It burned on the ear, a vile sound on the verge of being physically painful.

“What is that?” Wen Ruohan asked, frowning. He was standing above Nie Mingjue, his foot crushing down on his chest; Baxia was out of reach, knocked away, but at least no longer in the traitor Meng Yao’s hands. “Meng Yao…?”

“I - I’m not sure, Sect Leader Wen,” Meng Yao said, looking equally confused.

Nie Mingjue laughed.

They both looked at him.

He grinned up at them, blood in his teeth.

“What?” he said. “Never heard a Taotie before?”

[breitzbachbea]

Ask game for hws turkey!👀✨

Thank you two, amber and @needcake!

Ah yes, that old Turkish chestnut.

Send me a character and I'll give you a list

Favourite thing about them: I honestly love how intense he is. He's so eager and full of energy and devotion. It's fun to write people who love stuff, you know? As well as hate. Any strong emotion can be cathartic and I see myself in intense people (as strange as that sounds).

Least favourite thing about them: Oof, good question, I try not to think as much in terms of "good and bad" but interesting. I do think he can be quite an entitled prick at times, too, which is not a trait I vibe with in him.

Favorite line: Sad that my Hetalia Mangas aren't at hand, but I also wouldn't know if anything about his canon appearance sticks out. However, do have this line of dialogue from sadlygrove's İstanbul, which is seared into my brain (like many lines from sadlygrove's fics):

[Context: Greece asks: "Do you think there's anyone as pathetic as us?"]

"I ain't ever asked. We've had seven hundred years to love and fight one another. 's too much."

BrOTP: Oh, good question. Obviously I'd die for him and Dilan in my "Like Father Like Son" AU, but I am less well-versed in canon. I think he, Greece and Egypt also make a great friend trio.

OTP: My dear, my buddy, my pal, I would not have aph Turkey brainrot if it wasn't for TurGre. Listen. Listen. I'd lay my life down for him and Herakles, I will sip their tragedy up and yearn for a happy ending I know may be impossible until they lay my cold dead body into the ground. Reading İstanbul made me realize 4 years of emotional baggage I had never taken the time to deal with & I swear I've had a soulmelt with the Turk in that moment. I just ... I just love TurGre so much, in all of its complicated colours.

NOTP: I don't really have a nOTP with him, but I'll be real - I only care about him and Japan in a platonic manner. Zero interest in that ship, to be honest.

Random headcanon: Trying to think one of my own here ... Oh! He loves terrible Turkish Pop Music. Like, not even the iconic and overplayed stuff, he is into whatever the Turkish pop equivalent of Schlager is. Bottom of the barrel for anyone who isn't drunk/half-deaf, but he just thinks it's the most fun in the world. Bit of a guilty pleasure, though, he doesn't show it in front of other nations.

Unpopular Opinion: I don't even know what constitutes popular opinion. He's not a himbo. He's brash, he's loud, he's impulsive but he's not dumb. Turkey has an immensely sophisticated history and its people are very clever in every day life. He's not stupid, he's just lacking a bit in the "getting along with other people" department at times.

Song I associate with them: I've recently been thinking a bit about Empires/How this Imperial attitude carries over into my "Like Father Like Son" AU, so I've been thinking of him (& others) while listening to "Wolves" by Sam Tinnesz ft. Silverberg.

In the context of TurGre, my favourite song from Turkey's perspective is My Heart by Twin Wild. It captures him so perfectly, in his intensity and devotion; the lust he has for life.

Favorite picture of them: Toughie! I like most of the canon and fanart I see of him, but here's a top 3

1. This official art from the latest Hetalia volume. As soon as this thing is out in Germany and I get my hands on it, I will do nothing but stare all damn day at this page. Look at how nice and handsome and friendly and yet still rogueish he looks. I need to kiss him on the mouth.

2. This commission I got by @/captkirkland. I may be biased because he is also surrounded by his found family from my "Like Father Like Son" AU here, but I simply love how Turkish he looks.

3. This portrait my friend C0FFINATED over at twitter did of him two years ago. It should be illegal to be this beautiful. The nose. The eyes. The eyebrows. Such a strong face.

[yusei-clownington]

SO I FINALLY FINISHED 5D’S! And what better way to celebrate than to go through my favorite characters as…briefly as I can

Slight spoilers I suppose?

Let’s work it up from 10 to 1

10- Jack

Was gonna go with lucchiano but who am I kidding Jack’s great. He’s a drama queen with an even more dramatic wardrobe. Never afraid to express himself and just bluntly blurt out what he thought.

His obsession with Cup ramen is on another level but what can I say? Love is love, Jack x cup ramen for life *wipes tears*

But seriously speaking he’s great. His very first line was enough proof of that. He just… apologized for being late then declared “I AM KING” like the…king he is.

My favorite Rival character still remains Manjoume… and… Yeah I still prefer Kaiba over Jack but damn was he a good rival.

Like he has to be the only Rival so far with an actual past with the Main character, no? That was pretty interesting because usually, the protagonist meets the rival somewhere during the first season and we go off from there. But here we had to go through their backstory to know what their relationship was fully like. Nice touch.

9- Aki

Hands down my favorite female protagonist so far. I adore Anzu and feel neutral enough about Asuka but Aki? NAH MAN AKI’S AMAZING. I think 5D’s just does the best job with its female characters. Like it actually gives them big enough roles. I loved how Aki got her own episodes…be it the D-wheel ones or just… fillers.

Her crush on Yusei was justified, at least it seems so to me, and honestly never got obnoxious. Sure she had a moment here and there but it was honestly never a bad thing. Hell faith shipping in general isn’t exactly a bad Idea.

Speaking of shipping, is anyone going to talk about her little frienshipmaybemore moments with Crow? No? Ok…

But anyway, overall, SHE’S AMAZING AND I LOVE HER. There was more to her than some boring pining love interest and it shows with each episode. So when people say she has a great personality, they’re actually talking about her personality. AKI RULES

8- Mikage

Would’ve been way WAY higher on the list if the thing with Jack was thrown out the widow.

That being said I think she’s the more mature of the Jack-crazy trio. Like sure she was just as into him as the other two, but in some scenes she was a lot more tolerable.

But that honestly might just be my bias towards this amazing woman speaking.

She’s devoted to her work, gentle, caring, gorgeous and just all around a wonderful character to see.

I loved most of her scenes in the series, and the fact that there was more to her than just the jack part. She actually had an important part to play in many episodes and honestly proved herself to be a very fun character. I just wish they gave a her little more screentime than what she got.

A lot of lost potential there- I mean come on.

7- Rua /Lua

He reminds me of Judai WAY too much. LIKE WAAAAY too much not to be on this list. The guy’s adorable. And I love how they made him the emotional one. Like they could’ve gone with the “the boy is always rowdy and tOUGH” stereotype, but they didn’t. Sure, ruka (who I don’t like as much) was much more gentle, but it was much easier to see Rua cry than it was to see her do so. It’s just fun is all.

I also adore his deck and that little theme that played whenever he dueled… Plus his relationship with Jack and Yusei…GOLD GOLD.

6- Ushio

I made a whole post about Him, You think he wouldn’t be in my Top 10? Well think again. Great development would see through again.

5- Sherry Leblanc

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA SHERRY.

What you just witnessed in the line above is my internal reaction to literally any scene this beautiful badass woman happens to be in.

She’s just amazing. She has this really… tough energy IDK HOW TO DESCRIBE IT BUT SHE’S A REALLY INTIMIDATING WOMAN. But not in a bad way, oh nonononono in a REALLY REALLY GOOD WAY OKAY.

Her character arcs and episodes somehow felt…really separate from the whole team 5D’s shenanigans even though they were basically connected…

Like she had her own motivation that didn’t particularly rely on bonds, but was still willing to accept and even form a bond with the whole team.

Revenge is kinda hot ngl.

Okay no it’s not. But seeing a vengeful character that WASN’T played off as evil or particularly wrong amidst a bunch of friendship is magic ones was pretty refreshing.

The moment she took her helmet off when dueling yusei I was HOOKED and so was Aki but shhhhhh.

But damn I love what they did with her at the end, Rushed as it may have been. It took her joining with Z-one briefly and dueling Aki and Crow ( a very underrated duo btw) to realize that maybe thinking of the past and only the past was not a very good idea.

Anyway love her. And her duels are always a delight to watch.

4- Placido

Before he showed up, sherry was supposed to be 4th but here we are. Placido Placido Placido. I want to make it clear that…I really couldn’t care less about Aporia as a whole. But Placido and Lucchiano were pretty fun characters.

Now I finally get to talk about my beloved.

This dude was…the biggest mood. EVER.

He would hang up in that third one’s face like it was nothing and constantly ignore his boring ass. Oh. You have a plan? Ok. I don’t care. It’s boring. I’m placido and I’ll do what I want. Kiss my D-wheel ass.

He has a lot of hilariously sassy lines, which include and I quote:

“I don’t know what god wants you to do.”

“But I won’t accept it!”

The guy just does not care and I’m living for it.

Not to mention his bee analogies which- Why have I not seen anyone point out????? BEE ANALOGIES COME ONNNNNNNN

aNYWAY PLACIDO’S GREAT

3- Kiryuu

Edgy dude with pretty hair. Also gay. Also the crash town arc. Need I say more?

I will anyway.

Honestly dark signer Kiryuu was pretty fun to me with all the crazy laughter and stuff…

Then past/ flashbacks Kiryuu was just as interesting but in a completely different way. Sure he didn’t get as many episodes or screentime as the rest, but what I saw of him was more than enough for me to care about the Character. Like unlike the old satellite gang (Rally and the other two whose names I can’t even remember) I actually gave a shit about this guy when bad stuff happened to him.

Not to mention his growth. Like…He went through reverse/ negative development, then uphill by the end of the signers’ ark with all the…dying in your hands gayly stuff, then downhill again by the beginning of the crosstown arc….aaaaand back up and higher than ever by the end of it. Basically the fact that his development wasn’t always constant just added some spice.

Plus his dynamic with his ex-teammates…team….satisfaction (Try saying that with a straight face) was always pretty entertaining, especially his with Yusei.

Speaking of which...

2- Yusei

With all my talk about him…and…my profile picture…and URL, it may come as a surprise that he’s not number 1 here, but honestly it’s so close you could call it a tie.

As for why I love him….Have you- Have you seen my blog????? Do I even..need to say anything????

1- Crow

Now there’s a lot I have to say about Crow honestly hE’S JUST THAT COOL, but I’m saving it to talk about later still. All I’ll say for now is this:

Flashy guy with an amazing sense of style, an earring and an incredible amount of cockiness and charisma. What’s not to like?

[lifeinthegladhouse]

[polytheist asks] 2, 4, 13

Ha finally answering this but wanted to be on my laptop so I could open a tab 2.) What draws you to your Gods? What do you like about them? I like that they're present and interact with me in significant ways. Particularly Odinn has manifested since the death of my mother, but also has been there for me during really prominent and also rather mundane times. I realize he has been there since I was born... haha, but I didn't know. I like that he embodies so much of what I am about in really arcane ways, particularly with regards to being a transmasculine person who does magick, divination, seer-work, and as an anti-fascist who has parental roots in neo-n*zi gang shit appropriating p*gan gods.. it just makes sense. I have gotten drunk on some weird Odinn energy before and have also really used it to get me thru some shit, so I feel like he really Knows me quite fucking well. Loki I love because Loki brought me to the gods and also came to me first and has always been a warm protector of the home and hearth and sometimes appears as a funny little spider whenever I talk about him a lot. I don't leave offerings to him as much and treat him mostly as the highest form of wight/hearth deity than a all-powerful god type figure because he manifests to me very quietly and closely and by surprise. Freyja I love because she is pure and shows up when I least expect it, very much as bees and felines. I don't know her as well but have reached out to her before and have had some UPG things. I just get a very strong confident pure vibe like the smell of a nice body wash or the feeling of honey. 4. How do you picture the universe? What is your idea of its cosmology?

I don't. I try not to. But, I think about the universe as yknow this big grand space thing, nebulae and shit. I think of yggdrasil as well but not as much. I recognize that time is not linear and is instead an all encompassing spiral-like 3 dimensional cocoon thing...not sure how to describe it's web-like behavior but I base most of my decisions and daydreaming and processing around this sort of time mechanism thing. It's hard to describe...

13. What are some devotional acts you actively engage in?

I regularly leave offerings, mostly alcohol, coffee, water or tea. I like liquids because it's easy to dispose of later and also because it makes the most sense for Odinn although I leave sweets for Loki and Freyja, or meat/bread for Geri/Freki. I pray a lot, or just vocally give thanks like "thanks for this wonderful day". I try to visit Them in my dreams which doesn't always work (but they will visit me on their own time LOL), I do tarot/runes about offerings, etc. I try to live my life as a good Heathen by way of being inclusive obviously and informed and standing up for the right shit. I have a heathen playlist and am working on a novel based on a true story of encountering some wild god stuff. I love animals and want to work with them and try to identify them, particularly birds, and corvids (lol). I also love reading and actively just discovering stuff about the gods, history, etc.

[shy-magpie]

RQG 157

these things get long and are by definition one spoiler after another, so live blog under the cut

pre episode nonsense:

My hopes for this episode are mostly just the obvious: For Zolf to pull out of his spiral; for Azu to talk to someone about how she's doing; for Hamid to find his footing with the Kobolds (loving that they are devoting a proper arc to using unearned privilege/power rather than pretending it doesn't exist); more Cel lore; a Wug; and for someone to shake answers out of the Brorb. Not sure Alex is going to let us get to know the kids individually which makes sense as juggling 7 new NPCs would seriously cut into everyone else's screen time. I think we will get more of Skraak & Hamid working through their issues, and Skraak's helping the kids through recovery. If we are very lucky maybe Zolf & Skraak will talk rather than just have Zolf resent the Kobolds for putting Hamid in a place to fall into old habits. Okay lets hit play!

Episode live blogging:

Intros are quick: Zolf sounds low, Ben sounds higher energy than he was.

Oh the Brorb drawings come better when the other half is distracted but not thinking about the real topic.

Krakens are through out the globe, unknown numbers, not true instances of Shoin, network is down.

Cel and I both react to having Shoin be the one to come closest to a truly non physical form.*

Krakens are cloned brains in robot bodies. Specifically said Daleks not Jurassic Park.

Shoin thinks he sent a ransom note using the Kraken as a threat against the world.

Does not handle it well when Zolf hones in on that no one knows who he is, much less trembles at his name.**

Hamid follows Zolf's lead and twists it towards boasting about beating the Infection. The talking half doesn't seem to know how he did it as clearly as the drawing bit. Unfortunately its strictly surgical which would be hard to reproduce at scale even before you consider the side effects.

Quick huddle with the rest of the team:

Cel always wanted to go to London?

Zolf wants to ask more about how the infection works so they could prevent infection. Wilde thinks he is suggesting using Shoin's solution, I get Alex has to catch people up but I don't like Wilde being a paragraph behind me or underestimating Zolf.

Bryn wants to review the diary. Alex confirms the diary says he had a possible  way to "end it" as a whole.

They go back and Cel feigns being extremely impressed that Shoin might have a way to stop the infection. I think having time to regroup cut him off from his memory of the infection again. Alex spells out Shoin loses coherence whenever they bring up the infection/the time period around when he was infected.

Heal check time. Zolf crit fails. Azu got a 29 and can see where his theory was better than his surgery. It may be an aphasia (issues to with communication. can't get to certain words, some can't be spoken even if he understands the concept; others he can't understand if he hears them even if he uses the word/concept himself. Brain trauma, memory problems more severe the more recent you get, sounds like unable to store short term memory properly so anything longer ago than a week but after surgery likely lost.)

Cel switches to the simulacrum. He verbally dismisses it as a waste of time. His hand keeps drawing based on the previous question re:stopping the infection.

Alex calls for a sense motive. Zolf & Azu see the latest drawing is a landscape using technical notation. Its a barren mine. Yes! it's the entrance to Svalbard. Cel can see its a circuit. Alex makes us/Lydia wait until after he's done with the simulacrum stuff.

Shoin thinks using humans as your base design to improve from is the wrong approach, gives some credit to Francois Henri for taking a different approach.

The circuit maybe to transmit something, it needs an organic component. Cel couldn't roll much better then that so they probably need to kick it towards the Harlequins to set a team on.

Shoin is moaning about paying the bills. Took on the contract to provide Simulacrum fluidics to Damascus for the money.

Drawings change shape get less technical and focus on the cavern entrance. Ben catches it sounds yonic, Alex was trying to not go there but did he really think you could go from cave imagery to seed imagry without stopping there?

Hamid tries to get more on how he caught the infection.

Bryn and Alex spell out that to get answers you ask a real question he won't answer verbally but will answer with his hand, with a decoy to keep the talking him distracted while the hand answers.

Decoy question is about Harrison Campell.

Concept drawing of a person, overwhelmed by an image of a huge figure with lines going from the small to the large? Is he suggesting they plant someone they prepare to be infected, and have them infect it back?

Proofs? Minor changes between the proofs and published version of early Campbell books.

Another review session upstairs. Hamid's red string wall got cited as being useful! Cult of Hades/Wellington may have been the one to hire Shoin to make parts for Damascus. Zolf and Hamid talk briefly, about work and as dry "stick to the subject" as possible but they are talking productively.

Oh Ben finally gets in that the interrogation is hard on Zolf's knees because he has to keep his legs out of the cell. He snaps a little at Cel when they comment on cell vs Cel. Carter suggests "naughty box" which nicely derails that point of tension. Cel refers to Shoin as being more pleasant to talk to than Carter. Not sure if that undermines the tiny Cel/Carter ship or fuels it with tension.

Cel asks who hired Shoin to make Sim parts. He can answer directly. Well directly for him, it seems to be mostly justifying stealing Tesla's work on the basis that Tesla wasn't going to implement his theory. Hamid snipes him with a shot praising Edison to get him back on topic. Shoin says Edison was being backed by a big investor. Is it to much to hope this is Alex finally consolidating the factions? If Hades is Edison's investor (leaving Edison & co as effectively their minions, rather than a faction of their own) and the factory owners we can cut down on sides considerably.

He goes on about how he spied on Henri, religion as money maker. Shoin was directly approached by Hades lot. Shoin made sure his bits won't work since he didn't want competition. Wellington was his contact with Hades. Wellington always had a pair of cloaked figures.  Vinegar + squizard = funny? Could be useful.

Do not follow what is going on with the hand.

Shoin is still unstuck in time and thinks he is going to connect them. Cel unplugs the speaker on his villain speech. Cel induces a dream state by powering him down

~break~

Cel suggests  painlessly killing him. Zolf seconds the idea because its immoral to keep him like that.   Hamid points out the longer the keep him around the more likely it is for someone to be infected. Wilde rules they should kill and seal it off.

Cel & Zolf have an argument about having the Kobolds handle the remains. Cel calls Zolf out on his inconstant stance on whether the Kobolds can be infected because if he doesn't believe that then he is risking them.

Wilde is moving on? Cel suggests letting the Brorb die, putting it in a bag of holding, keeping the bag in the anti magic field.

They can't just call Einstein because using unofficial channels is bad when irregular behavior is a sign of infection(?)

Alex's unhealthy attitudes about productivity are called out when he refers to the time Wilde spends thinking/planning before getting their transport arranged as "working" (with the inverted commas) rather than considering it part of the work.

They work out possible paths if teleporting is off the table.

And the boys are snapping at each other again. Zolf, you can't flip out every time you are reminded that Hamid doesn't have the experience or expertise of a seasoned sailor. Yeah you did leave the team without your skills and maybe the kid was a bit green for a field promotion; but you know what? He did a fine job, and the other choices were Sasha, who wouldn't lead, and Bertie, who shouldn't. Just because stepping down was the right thing to do, doesn't mean you get to lose it when you are confronted with the mere allusion to the idea it had consequences.

Barnes tells Hamid why going over the pole is a really bad idea. That Azu's suggestion is carrying Hamid has troubling symbolism.

Zolf actually comes more or less to Hamid's defense by pointing out that all their options are bad options, so having a go at Hamid's idea in particular is unwarranted.

I'm not going to bother listing out options. They will pick one or won't need to pick one. If we have been a very good fandom Alex may reward us with Earhart coming back as their preferred transport.

There we go, Hamid suggests her, Zolf seizes on the idea compliments Hamid on it, and immediately takes it to Wilde. Thank God he isn't so far down he can't do that. If he isn't compulsively shooting down any hope (especially from Hamid) then he really is on the upswing from the low brought on by quarantine stress.

Lydia isn't happy that there isn't going to be an American chapter. Then again we wrote off Svalbard, so don't give up!

Its the Northwest Passage and its so weird realizing that not everyone has it as a cultural reference. Wonder if it's an Oregon thing or a US thing.

Yes it would have been cool, but I think Alex is not going to let us have cool new story arcs when we haven't played with the ones we have at home.

Einstein and Earhart are our two best transport options. I am a happy fan. Especially if Zolf has to use his family and Earhart’s reaching out to him near the end of the journey to appeal to her. I mean we did get more on Zolf's relationship with his family than I expected after Paris, so I'm not going to sulk if they don't pursue this, but it would be nice.

Conflicted as a fan, its hard to remember that this taking months extra is a bad thing when the end of the series is feeling too close for comfort.

Zolf, look at you leveraging your experience with moving even when things feel hopeless!

Cel I love you, kraken as submarine is brilliant. Air kraken is suggested by Carter.

Hamid plays with the ideas while Alex goes "why?". Because you are going to have to work a hell of a lot harder than that if you want Hamid to see it as a no win situation rather than proof he needs to redouble on cheerful creativity. Feeling like he had no options led to the worst parts of Hamid's life, the things he is truly ashamed of; having few losses outside of those, he is going to make Kirk's Kobayashi Maru hang ups look amateur.

Zolf is heading to the beach.

Cel is checking on their village.

Hamid wants to contact Einstein himself, Zolf says he should talk to Wilde about that. Hamid wants Zolf with him for that meeting. Zolf either doesn't want to be a safety blanket, wants Hamid to get used to dealing with Wilde directly, or completely missed Hamid offering a chance to work together because he is incapable of seeing Wilde as an opponent. He does say some nice things about being a team.

Hamid tells Cel to say hi to Jasper for them. He is good at the people side of leadership. Remembering names and relationships, knowing how to show he cares because it's important to Cel without overstepping. If Zolf can learn to let go of the rank stuff, they could be an unbeatable team of co leaders.

Zolf nods at Azu. Azu smiles proudly back. Alex jokes about not liking giving them time to heal because they coordinate.

Hamid offers hugs to both Cel and Zolf. Because this entire character is a "fuck you" to toxic masculinity and he is not afraid to openly show affection to his friends.

Cel gives him a great hug.

Zolf hesitates but gives him a pat on the shoulder. Hamid's has high enough charisma to make that not awkward. Good kid, accepting that Zolf is reaching out as far as he can.

Hamid talks to Skraak. Hamid is worried about taking the kids. Maybe Skraak can convince them to stay & help Jasper with science. Because RQG loves us and wants us to be happy, they are considering a fantasy some of us harbored since "science" as a serious possibility. Could solve the issue with Alex not wanting the kids to take up too much screen time too. Skraak is the perfect character for Hamid to have as his second. He believes in Hamid, and can be confided in, but isn't going to take an ounce of self pity or bullshit.

Alex that village better be okay. Smoke? Controlled burn. Ben lightens the mood. The tank is still guarding the village. The barricade is up but they are guarding about as well as a village of level 0(1?) characters can be expected to.

They are having a party and there is a bon fire. Because Alex knows we wouldn't have trusted him if there wasn't a little scare with the smoke. !puns

The village is visibly healing since the weather is fixed. They thank Cel but know better than to ask.

Jasper! Jasper is looking good. He stepped in as a leader of the village. Cel and I could burst with pride. Jasper thinks Cel is coming to stay, Cel tries to explain they are going to help save the other villages around the world and mentions that Jasper would like the Kobolds.

!puns

* One day I need to hunt down the right corner of SF because there has got to be a decent amount of trans humanist fiction for trans humans out there somewhere.

**Not sure if I should feel bad for hoping this gives him a safe target for his destructive tendencies. Ideally Zolf would get past that point without indulging his dark side lest he reinforce bad coping mechanisms. Ideally Zolf would have weekly therapy without the fate of the world on his shoulders too. Its the more personal version of looking forward to a fight after Hamid's been stressed because he seems to find cooking baddies cathartic.

[traincat]

Fic Author Tag Game

AO3 Name: Traincat

Fandoms: Currently it’s fairly exclusively Fantastic Four and Spider-Man comics, particularly the 616-verse, with some works for related fandoms.

Number of fics: 102 posted on Ao3. 

Tagging @bipeteparker @moonwolfhowl @mishatheberry

1) Fic you spent the most time on: The Boy From New York City, my The Amazing Spider-Man/Fant4stic Spideytorch movieverse fic, definitely. I started it in 2015 and posted it in late 2018. A lot of that wasn’t active writing time -- I wrote about 50k of its 80k wordcount in 2018. But it was a fic that I spent a lot of time on and a lot of energy devoted to, trying to figure out what the best way to tell the story was, playing with different point of views, what the actual plot was going to be, what I wanted it to say, and that’s not counting the amount of times I watched TASM/2 and Fant4stic to try and nail down everything just how I wanted it. Andrew Garfield’s Peter Parker speech patterns are SUPER specific and I wanted to get them DOWN. I also wanted things to play out in a very cinematic way, like a third installment of The Amazing Spider-Man movies. So a lot of time went into that fic. 

2) Fic you spent the least time on: To Have and to Hold, an Into the Spider-Verse fic about May Parker and Olivia Octavius getting married, much to Peter’s distress. I think I wrote it in like a day. 

3) Longest fic: The Boy From New York City, at 84,500 words. 

4) Shortest fic: wrap yourself around me, a really short Spideytorch clothes sharing fic. It’s under 500 words.

5) Most hits: The Masked Man (Who Has Everything), an X-Men: First Class Erik/Charles fic I wrote back in 2011 to answer a very important question on the old LJ kink meme: what if Magneto was Batman? It has like, almost 75,000 hits, so. That was an easy one lol.

6) Most kudos: It’s also The Masked Man (Who Has Everything), so my second most kudosed fic is Keep Throwing Things and Slamming the Door, one of my first Spideytorch fics. 

7) Most comment threads: To Have and to Hold again! Which is kind of nice since it’s relatively new. It did get some pretty big recs though so I’m not all that surprised. 

8) Fave fic you wrote: Oh that’s a tough one. I have a couple of favorites -- I really like the fics in my Tales From the Back Pages series, which is a Spideytorch soulmates AU that plays with the very early days of canon and reimagines it within a world where soulmates are a known phenomenon and Peter and Johnny are each other’s. It’s fun to take canon events that are really familiar and go, what do they look like in this world where everything is the same but also there’s this one really big difference? The Boy From New York City again because I worked on it for so long and at the end I pushed myself really hard to make it exactly what I wanted it to be and I’m really proud of the end result. It’s also one of those fics where I feel like writing it made me a better writer ultimately because I was pushing myself so hard to be like, worthy of what it was in my head. Work Song, which is a Spideytorch canon rewrite of the aftermath of Superior Spider-Man. Another one where I feel like I learned a lot by writing it and where I’m really proud of the end result, even if I did have to read all of Superior Spider-Man to write it. Cat's Cradle, a Spider-Man PS4 Peter/Felicia fic about their maybe-baby from the DLC, because I really loved writing that fic. Night Blooms, a Victor Von Doom/Reed Richards fic based around Reed’s connection to the alternate universe Victor from Marvel Two-In-One (2017) #11, because canon gave me so much to work with there and because it was a Yuletide fic for @portwinestains where I knew I could give her exactly what she wanted and I just went for it. Writing that one was a blast and I got to dig into such a rich canon relationship. It was fantastic, even if while I had to like, try and subtly find out how much infidelity Aysha was cool with without letting her know what I was doing. 

And then there’s Hands On where I like, REALLY wanted to be the first person to write Spideytorch smut featuring six arm Spider-Man. And I was. And weirdly that genre of fic hasn’t taken off? Look, you just need to keep very detailed notes for yourself about where all eight hands involved are. 

9) Fic you want to rewrite/expand on: There are a couple! They’re expansions, not rewrites. I don’t think I have anything finished that I feel I would want to rewrite from scratch. I have a third installment of my fairy tale series, The Spider Prince and the Morning Star, where the idea is like very fresh in my head right now so I’ve been playing with that a lot. The first two fics in the series are Spideytorch, but this one is a MYSTERY pairing. (It’s not that big of a mystery. It’s pretty easy to guess what it’s going to be based on the end of the second fic.) And there’s a lot of stuff from The Boy From New York City where it was like, I had ideas about where I COULD go with things, if I wanted to. The Boy From New York City is very much Peter’s story, very much The Amazing Spider-Man 3, so I think there is a lot of space to go forward that would be more focused on Johnny. But on the other hand I do think a lot about a fic that takes The Amazing Spider-Man 2′s deleted alternate ending and asks the question, what if instead of meeting his father in the graveyard, Peter met the sixteen-year-old sister he never knew he had? And I don’t know how many people want TASM fic about what Teresa Parker would be like in that universe but you know. I kind of do. 

10) Share a bit of your WIP or share a story idea that you’re planning: PeterFlash 2020! I’m working on it. It got long and I wanted to play with canon, what else is new.

“You were always stuck up,” Flash grunted, lying down on a flat stretch of rock. It was freezing cold, leaching the heat through Flash’s jacket and jeans, but it felt good at the same time. “And you made Liz cry.”

“I didn’t make Liz Allan cry,” Peter snorted, rolling his eyes.

“You did, though,” Flash said, closing his eyes. He probably shouldn’t have said that, he knew. Liz wouldn’t have liked it. But Peter had made her sob until the cuffs of her pink sweater had been wet with her tears and Flash had just had to stand there and take it, unable to make it better as badly as he had wanted to, all because stupid Peter Parker was too thick to see that Liz was the best thing in their entire school. “She really liked you and you just ignored her.”

“I was busy,” Peter said. Flash cracked open an eye; Peter was standing over him, staring down at him with a quizzical expression on his face, like Flash was one of his fancy complicated math problems, only Peter had never had a hard time solving those.

Warmth spread from Flash’s stomach right down to his toes with the idea that he was the kind of problem even Peter Parker might have trouble solving.

“We were all busy,” Flash said, shrugging. “We all had stuff. Doesn’t mean you had to ignore everybody else.” 

“I wanted to be liked,” Peter admitted, sitting down crosslegged next to Flash. He had a funny kind of look on his face, his brows knit together fiercely. He was going to have a wrinkle there in a couple of years, probably. Butterflies lit up in Flash’s stomach, trying to imagine it.

“You had a funny way of showing it,” Flash said.

“Yeah, yeah,” Peter grumbled, stretching out next to him. He put his arms behind his head, looking for all the world like he was sunning himself even though it was November and practically freezing already. “What are you gonna do now?”

“I don’t know,” Flash admitted, trying not to stare down at him. It wasn’t like Peter would ever know, though – his eyes were closed. “Get a job, I guess.”

“Flash Thompson, working man,” Peter whistled.

“Don’t strain something not being a jackass, Parker, you’ve gone a whole five minutes,” Flash said, rolling his eyes. “It’s not like I’ve got a choice. Can’t stay in school without that scholarship and it’s not like I can go home.”

Peter cracked one eye open. Something about his eyes had always made Flash’s stomach go funny; they were the warmest brown he’d ever seen, flecked with gold, and they shone on those rare occasions when Peter laughed. But usually they looked how they looked now: filled with suspicion, and just a touch of scorn.

“You can’t go home?” he asked.

[hecohansen31]

I Could Have Another You In A Minute

Gunnhild+Ingrid (Modern AU)

“To the left, to the left Everything you own in the box to the left In the closet, that's my stuff Yes, if I bought it, please don't touch (Don't touch) And keep talking that mess that's fine But could you walk and talk at the same time And, it's my name that's on that jag So remove your bags, let me call you a cab “

“Irreplaceable” by Beyoncé

(A/N): Hello there lovelies!

I have decided to write a few different fics since we are in pride month, to honor all the different shades of love (I obviously know that this is an extremely commercial thing, but I just wanted you to know that you are more than welcome to request this kind of fics, if you are interested!).

I have another one pubblished on my AO3 (of the same name), and I’ll try to upload it here too!

I hope that Bjorn’s stans will know that this is just me messing around with a ptompt and I don’t mean no offense (although Bjorn to me is like that husband on the show ‘Seeking Sisters Wives’, whose wife broke down crying because she didn’t want a polyamorous relationship and he simply just stood there) (also no offense to polyamorous relationships, this isn’t my intent, and I do think that show portrays ‘poly-love’ in the worst way possible).

I really hope you’ll like this idea, although it is different from my usual, and if you end up actually liking it, please do give me some feedback, if you feel like it.

Feedback always helps us writers in feeling motivated and writing more, so if it pleases you, don’t forget to leave a comment or a reblog, if you liked it.

Feedback makes our heart beat and our fingers write faster!

Have a nice reading!

WARNINGS: Cheating, Slight Mention of Sex, Slight Misogyny (Girl-On-Girl Hate)

Gunnhild hadn’t thought this day would come.

Certainly, she hadn’t thought that a man like Bjorn with two previous disastrous marriages would have been truly faithful to her till death did them apart.

But at the same time, she hadn’t thought it’d happen this soon.

And in this way.

She had started noticing Bjorn straying away from her bed and her arms, but she hadn’t thought much about it, mostly because they had both always been pretty independent from each other, something she had prided herself with.

Which turned out the same thing that had brought her husband away from her.

Making him tired of her.

Alongside the pretty blonde thing that had been keeping company at him by night.

Her name was Ingrid.

She was the secretary at the corporation Bjorn ruled over, after he had been able to disentangle it from his younger brother’s hands, mostly thanks to Gunnhild.

It felt strange for her to see that so many things that she had done being the ones that had pushed Bjorn in Ingrid’s awaiting arms.

Almost as if she had been the one pushing him in them.

She was a pretty thing, certainly a bit younger than Gunnhild, and immediately the wife had known what her husband had seen in his lover: the promise of a renewed youth through her thighs and her pretty smiles.

She had once caught Bjorn in such a ritual, pushing himself as some graceless boar between the thighs of the slender woman, in a way that had made Gunnhild question if this was the way he also acted with her in bed.

If she had been simply too blinded by the need to please him, to make him feel like she enjoyed truly rusty bedroom antics to notice how truly awful Bjorn looked, old and almost funny in his search for eternal youth.

That had been the first time she had caught them, together, in his office.

And at first, she had hated Ingrid with all her heart.

She now recognized that it had been one attempt to shift the blame away from the man who had done the true act of betrayal, because although it indeed took two to cheat, it was her husband who had decided to fall in the temptation of a pretty face.

He should have known better.

He had a devoted wife.

Somebody who had given up her entire career to be with him.

Gunnhild, fierce and strong Gunnhild, one of the best lawyers in entire Norway if not Scandinavia, had decided to become a soft-spoken trophy-wife for Bjorn Ironside, taming the wildness in her wicked ways that her previous husband had loved so so much.

The result had been awkward.

She wasn’t well-liked in the social circles.

She wasn’t one to smile at photographers or to hold her tongue, meanwhile Bjorn and his colleagues spoke of the latest harassment lawsuit they had avoided with a hefty sum.

It was tiring on the long run.

But for a long time, she had blamed for it.

But she had thought it would have made Bjorn happy.

It would have made him stop his antics of chasing skirt after skirt.

She had also used this to justify Bjorn’s cheating ways.

So, for a long time, she had been quietly raging against Ingrid, meanwhile her husband chased her skirt, but didn’t decide in the slightest to end things with Gunnhild, keeping her good and at his own use, anytime he needed.

But it was all coming to an end.

She could feel it.

This was simply a temporary situation.

So, she hadn’t been surprised when Bjorn had asked to talk about the ‘Ingrid’s situation’.

But she hadn’t expected to hear what he uttered.

‘I want her and you’ he had spoken almost as if he should have been flattered of it ‘… she is… she is what is missing in our relationship’.

And those words had been her blessing.

Those words had opened her closed eyes.

And she had realized that it had been Bjorn who had been missing something, not her.

Because she had been happy in this relationship…

… most of the time…

And if something was missing…

… it wasn’t Ingrid.

He would have chased again new skirts and new women, after her.

No matter her.

No matter if Gunnhild accepted this or not.

He liked the thought of being able to pry away the innocence of the most resilientgirls  like he had done with Gunnhild and he enjoyed even more the thought of silly young things like Ingrid flocking at him in admiration, like a small girl that had to learn the world.

And he was the solely one who could teach her.

But it was all huge bullshit.

And she had finally realized it.

‘Honestly Bjorn… I don’t think that it’d be fair…’ she had spoken and immediately Bjorn had started pleading and then he had pouted, almost as a silly child, who had been denied his favorite toy.

But Gunnhild slept lovely at that sound.

As she planned her own revenge.

If Bjorn wanted to chase youth through the things of some basic secretary, why couldn’t she do the same.

With the same girl.

The following morning, she had blamed her own bad humor and answer to her period, knowing that Bjorn wouldn’t have questioned such thing.

He never questioned anything as long as it profited him.

‘But I’d like to know more of this Ingrid before agreeing to this lifestyle’ she had spoken, as they ate breakfast, enjoying the way Bjorn’s face crooked in a confused expression ‘… I haven’t seen much more of her than her ass, and I’ll have to soon share an house with her and an husband. I’d like to test if she is a proper addiction to our life’.

She had particularly enjoyed the small bicker that had ensued after, as Bjorn tried his best to mark up his authority, suggesting there was no need for such a control, but in the end the strenuous lawyer, that Gunnhild was, had won her also this case.

And the chase had begun.

Ingrid, at first, had seemed wary of her and her nearness.

Certainly it wasn’t an everyday thing that the wife of your lover came to your house for an afternoon tea with no desire to slap you as in the worst telenovelas or beg you to leave her husband alone.

Gunnhild had simply told her Bjorn’s plans, insisting on a few details…

… intimate details that had left Ingrid a bit hot on the cheeks.

And she had enjoyed the sight of it.

Maybe a bit more than it was proper for her plan.

But soon it had all started its motion, as she made sure to pass more and more time with Ingrid, making her feel comfortable in her presence, to the point that anybody in a crowd would have thought that they were the bestest of friends.

If not straight up girlfriends.

And it was nice that Ingrid seemed far more than the typical ‘I fuck the boss’ girl.

A good dash of wickedness in her eyes held an ambition that spoke directly to Gunnhild’s own heart.

‘I’d like to be something more than a secretary, but…’ she had once mentioned, meanwhile they drank a coffee after one of their shopping trips (she and Gunnhild seemed to get an immense satisfaction at wrecking Bjorn’s credit cards) ‘… but it isn’t easy, when you don’t have the connections and people see you as too pretty than to be anything but  a wife’.

It had seemed strange to hear that Ingrid had problems like that and something in Gunnhild had softened, and the artificial interest she had been having for their last meetings had become more genuine, till the point that Gunnhild had started becoming more and more interested in Ingrid.

She wanted to see the woman behind the cover of the ‘perfect girl’ she put up.

Something that could have completely ruined her plan.

Hence on one of their ‘dates’ she had asked Ingrid.

‘Tell me something, Ingrid, and don’t even try to lie’ she had focused her steely eyes on the beautiful blonde woman in front of her, who, in her favor, hadn’t backed down from the other woman’s stare, leaning in instead ‘… do you have any intention of using my husband?’.

She had seemed truly shocked by her insinuation and for a moment Gunnhild had thought that she had undervalued Ingrid’s interest and ambition and then the woman had breathed.

“Yes, I do” and it had been almost as if Pandora’s vase had opened “… he doesn’t see me as anything more than a pretty decent fuck, he has been lurching off me for the fucking energy that I give him, for the status of having such a young lover, why should I not take something from him, as well? This way we’ll both gain something from it’.

And Gunnhild hadn’t ever smiled larger.

‘Well then I have a proposition for you’.

They had brought themselves away from Bjorn’s grasps, denying him constantly the pleasure of your intimacy, meanwhile some sort of intimacy grew between them, to the point that a clumsy kiss happened, after too much wine and a few laughs to Bjorn’s expenses, on a retreat in Ingrid’s apartment.

‘You see me’ Ingrid had spoken ‘… you have your eyes open even when they are closed, and you see me as more than a pretty face’.

‘I see you as the devious minx that you truly are, Ingrid’ her words were aggressive, as the kiss she planted on her lips ‘… and I like it very much’.

And they had found themselves in bed.

And Ingrid upon her had looked like a true masterpiece.

And felt even better.

Bjorn the following day had found the divorce papers already signed.

And a special text from Ingrid.

Gunnhild now had her eyes open now and she never intended to go back to when they were closed.

---

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[bookwyrmbran]

Day 16: an Odin playlist

Day 16: Create a song list that makes you think about your deity. Give a brief reason for choosing each song, and provide links to youtube videos for other people to enjoy! You can devote the energy you put into this project as an offering for your deity.

Okay, so for this one I am very carefully AVOIDING songs which specifically mention the Old Man. That means no Heilung, no Leslie Fish, no Skald. All of these are wonderful! I highly recommend! But I feel like the point of this prompt is choosing stuff that actually requires explaining (or at least that’s how I’m reading it; ymmv) and those are all kind of just right out there and deliberately on the nose.

Also, there are 18 of these, because it makes me chortle.

1. “The Hymn of Acxiom,” Vienna Teng. “Leave your life open, you don’t have to hide / Someone is gathering every crumb you drop/ these mindless decisions and moments you long forgot.” Creepy-ass choral song for a creepy-ass Watcher, absolutely enchantingly gorgeous as long as you don’t listen too hard to the lyrics and absolutely terrifying once you do. 

2. “Strange Waters,” Bruce Cockburn. “You’ve been leading me/ beside strange waters/ streams of beautiful lights in the night/ but where is my pastureland in these dark valleys?/ if I lose my grip, will I take flight?” Loooooots of seiðr feels, lots of wanderer feels, the sense of endless travel in strange places drawn there by a stranger God.

3. “So Come Back, I Am Waiting,” Okkervil River. I can’t actually pick a piece of this to quote here. All of it is just too damn on the nose. But that satisfaction, that awareness that oh yes, you might be running right now, you might be elsewhere right now, but that’s fine. He’ll be waiting. “There’s plenty of time to make you mine.”

4. “Edge of the Western World,” Bone Poets Orchestra. Okay, this one is maybe a bit on the nose, a raven throwing a party at the edge of the world, but like: “The tasty things a lonely raven mind requires/ spread out beneath your wings on the shore/ Never met a crow who found the end of desire, so quoth the hungry Raven: Always more.” (I get big Two-Man Con vibes from this one, ngl.)

5. “Catapult,” Arctic Monkeys. “Both sides, and softly came the growl from both sides/ and if his whisper splits the mist/ just think of what he’s capable of with his kiss/ Nice try -- you cannot turn away but nice try.” Two for one: sex AND the Old Con’s particular style of captivating bastardry!

6. “Big God,” Florence + The Machine. Do I really need to explain this one? Other, maybe, than mentioning that one time it turned on at a very inopportune moment (with accompanying leering via godphone) that nearly resulted on me choking on air while trying to be a Very Serious Professional?

7. “Boots,” Kesha. “So slide over here, tell me the truth, I know you love me wearing nothing but your boots.” Laughing at both myself and Him for this one: my experience with Him is that He’s worse than all the rest combined when it comes to being very fucking grabby about anything I wear that might possibly be considered a reference back to Him. Corvids.

8. “Death Whispered a Lullaby,” Opeth. Just… the whole thing. I’m not sure it’s meant to be soothing, and yet….

9. “Der letzte Tanz,” Elisabeth, das Musical. Y’all. This entire thing is so much fun, I highly recommend it, it is fantastic. Preening over-the-top incredibly dramatic psychopomp getting huffy at people (and liking them better!) for not just, like, being immediately entranced, it’s great. “Der letze Tanz, der letzte Tanz, gehört allein nur mir -- den letzen Tanz, den letzen Tanz, tanz’ ich allein mit dir!”

10. “The Hunter’s Star,” Shearwater. “As forests bow/ and blacken the air/ as the canopies burn away/ and the arc-light fades/ and no gull remains/ to repeat its call/ only now would you long/ for the ancient boughs….” This has very Ragnarok and/or twilight of the gods feels to me, also very much wanderer who has forgotten where home is, if ever they knew. 

11. “Witch,” The Bird And The Bee. “Yes, I am a carnival/ a house of mirrors/ and I will con you/ and all my tricks/ and all my magic/ will keep you dizzy/ with desire.” Oðin as drag queen, or: what happens on Samsø stays on Samsø. Maybe. Theoretically. (It totally doesn’t.)

12. “Silent Lucidity,” Queensrÿche. “There’s a place I like to hide/ a doorway that I run through in the night./ Relax, child, you were there/ you only didn’t realize and you were scared./ (If you open your mind for me/ you won’t rely on open eyes to see.)” This one is like. I get shivers from listening to it with the Old Man in mind. (@grimnirslee this is why I startled so hard when you asked about Dreamfather)

13. “Somebody To Die For,” Hurts. “I’ve got nothing left to live for/ got no reason yet to die/ But when I’m standing in the gallows/ I’ll be staring at the sky/ Because no matter where they take me/ in death I will survive/ and I will never be forgotten/ with you by my side.” Can we say Havamal callback? All things die but the good name, the memory, and He’s got a long memory; where better to be kept? 

14. “Come Away To The Water,” Maroon 5. Hard for me to pull any one part out; the entire thing feels very viscerally like the Old Wolf laying a path of desire straight to waiting jaws, a ravenous maw. To be devoured, rent, to be eaten by a God (and perhaps from there reconstituted: but first the devouring, divine.)

15. “Irgendwie, Irgendwo, Irgendwann,” Nena. “Im Sturz durch Zeit und Raum/ erwacht aus einem Traum/ nur ein kurzer Augenblick/ dann kehrt die Nacht zurück.” Interacting with Him feels sometimes like tumbling through the vast chaotic maelstrom of Being, everything revealed suddenly as masks in flux, as dreams constructed and shared to paste a layer of sense and meaning. That fleeting moment, that blink of an eye in which one is awake, and sees -- and then the night comes mercifully down again, protective.

16. “It Will Come Back,” Hozier. This whole damn thing feels like a warning designed to seduce, a flash of fangs behind smiling lips. Oh, sure, He’s saying right out that I know better than to let Him in… but we both know it’s going to happen anyways, don’t we? 

17. “Storyteller,” Alexander James Adams. “Please, Storyteller, pull a tale from your pocket/ Spin me a story from your coattails so bare/ My heart has turned cold, my dreams are too old,/ and I need to know magic’s still there.” This is the one I listen to when I’m world-weary and exhausted and the world is too much and my work is too much and I’m having trouble figuring out how the fuck to keep caring about any of it -- and that grizzled old warrior, the wanderer, the gifter of inspiration, comes through with a story, with enough reenchantment to keep going.

18. “Star Trek: Original Theme.” ...Okay, so no lyrics here, but y’all know the opening bit for ST:TOS? “To explore strange new worlds; to seek out new life and new civilizations; to boldly go where no man has gone before.” Tell me that that whole sentiment isn’t right up the Wanderer’s alley!

[amyscascadingtabs]

with you, i am prepared for what is yet to come

(my take on post-casecation for you)

read on ao3

Jake wakes up after her the next morning.

Admittedly, he wakes up after Amy most mornings, and finds the blessed minutes they can spend talking and cuddling while half-awake in the morning to be the best imaginable start of the day.

Only this morning, Amy’s not in bed next to him, and for a fugacious moment, there’s a judgemental voice in his head asking what if she left.

What if she did decide to start over, despite their argument ending in mutual agreement? What if he dreamed the end of their evening, with thai-food and Property Brothers, baby names and stupid good sex?

He reaches out a hand and draws a breath of relief when he finds her side of the mattress still warm under the straightened half of the comforter. His heartbeat finally slows to a healthy bpm when he hears the sound of someone moving in the kitchen, closing a cabinet, turning on the water tap. She’s humming something upbeat, something resembling his innovative casecation-melody of yesterday, and he can feel the smell of coffee.

Not finding the point of staying in bed when his gorgeous, brilliant wife is up and about making coffee for them, he throws the comforter aside and puts on yesterday’s navy hoodie over his t-shirt before making his way out to the kitchen.

She’s there, because of course she is, despite what tricks the hateful voice in his head attempts, and he swears his heart is lighter the moment he sees her. She’s stolen his flannel from yesterday over a low-cut black tank-top and grey pajama shorts, and it’s just as adorable as it’s distractingly attractive. If they weren’t already married, he’d propose to her all over again in this moment.

“Nice flannel”, he remarks. “You look cute.”

“Borrowed it from the best. You’ll get it back.”

“Eh. It looks hotter on you anyway.”

Amy snorts, but she’s grinning. “Sorry I didn’t wait for you to wake up. You seemed exhausted, and I had too much energy, so I thought I’d get a start on breakfast. Coffee, at least.”

“It’s okay.” He makes an uncomfortable grimace. “I mean, there was a moment where I thought maybe you had left for good, but - that’s just in my head, right?”

She frowns, confused. “Of course that’s just in your head - why’d you even think I would leave?”

“Because of what you said yesterday. About starting over.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

“I’m sorry”, she whispers, biting her lip. “I shouldn’t have said it like that.”

He fidgets with his hands before speaking, hiding them in the pockets of his hoodie as he looks down at the floor, then up to meet her eyes. She’s watching him, her head tilted slightly to the side and her lips pursed. Her attentiveness manages to make the words feel yet more terrifying, but somehow, he manages them.

“I just don’t want to lose you. Ever. And hearing you say it, even if you didn’t mean it - I hated it. Because losing you is my worst nightmare.”

“It’s my worst nightmare, too. Florida, prison…” Amy shakes her head. “I never want to experience any of that again. Not in a million years.”

“Then why’d you say it?”

She doesn’t give him an immediate answer. Rather, she takes a few steps back, watching as the pot fills with the steaming hot, black coffee she’ll pour milk in while Jake will douse his with sugar.

“I just needed you to understand. I’d never want to leave you, but I do want to have kids and I don’t have forever, you know? You don’t have a biological clock to consider, I do.” The machine beeps, signaling their coffee is ready, and he watches as she takes out the well-used matching Mr and Mrs-mugs and pours it into them.

“I’d never want to leave you”, she says, looking at him again. “But if you never wanted kids and I did, that’d be an irreconcilable difference. I wouldn't have been happy. You wouldn't have been happy. I don't want that for us.” Amy sighs. “That's why I said it. It was stupid and emotional, and you have to understand it's my literal nightmare. I was taken aback.”

Jake nods, trying to make what she's saying sink in, use her rational arguments to choke the indefatigable narrative his abandonment issues are presenting in the back of his head.

“I get it”, he says, because the part of his brain that's devoted to logical thinking does, and he figures that's what counts. “We really should have talked about it before.”

“We really should have.” She hands him the coffee cup with both milk and sugar, and he accepts it with a grateful smile. “I'm sorry I never properly brought it up. I kind of… assumed, I guess.”

“It's okay.”

“No.” She shakes her head, apologetic smile on her lips. “It's not, really. I'm sorry about not bringing it up for real.”

“Same here.”

Neither of them says anything for a while, letting the first sips of hot coffee come before further conversation. Amy sits up on the counter, flicking through the day's mail to see if there's anything other than a few flyers and the newspaper with its crossword, and hands him a two week early birthday card from his aunt Linda with squiggly handwriting on it.

“You were just always so happy around kids”, his wife explains, talking to him while he reads and puts away the card. “Terry’s daughters, Nikolaj, Iggy. My nieces and nephews. You love them, and I guess I just figured you wanted your own, someday.”

He thinks of babysitting and reading stories to Ava, of chasing Nikolaj through the playground when they babysat him for a full weekend, of holding weeks-old Iggy as she grabbed on tight to his pinkie and fell asleep. He does love kids, and he’d be lying to say he’s never pictured what it’d be like to have them with Amy, because he has - but he’s also terrified beyond compare.

Loving a kid means wanting them to have a good childhood. Jake knows too well what the lack of one can entail.

“I do love them”, he tells her, seeing her gaze soften and smile form. “But, you know, they’re not mine. I can’t permanently ruin them or scar them too bad. Because that’s what I’m scared of. I’m scared I’ll have kids, and love them, but still never be good enough.”

“I get it.”

He shakes his head. “Do you, though?”

“Of course I do. I mean, I’ve always wanted kids, and even I’m scared of a billion things. You know what it’s like to have a crappy father”, she says, reaching for his hand and linking it with hers, “it makes total sense for you to be scared of being one. But I don’t think you will.”

“How can you know?”

“Well, how certain are you that I’d be a good mom?”

Jake considers it for a while, recalling images of Amy teaching the Jeffords twins facts about feminism, of her barely wanting to let go of Iggy even when the baby puked all over her nice blouse, and of how much her nieces and nephews seem to genuinely love their Tía Amy. There’s no doubt anywhere in his mind of it; she’d be incredible.

“So certain”, he admits with complete honesty, and she blushes.

“You see - that’s how sure I am you’d be an amazing dad. You’d never ‘ruin’ your kid. You wanna know how I know?”

He nods, and she jumps down from the counter, holding both of his hands and taking a step closer so she’s directly in front of him, demanding all of his focus.

“Because you’re the most wonderful, loving, kind-hearted person I know. I don’t even think you’re capable of ruining someone. If anything, you make people better. You made me better.”

He doesn’t say anything - can’t say anything, can’t make himself do anything but take her into his arms, hugging her close. He rubs her back to comfort her, feeling the last remaining tension from yesterday’s discussion melt away into nothingness.

“You make me better”, he whispers in her ear. “I love you. And, you know - I do love kids. I guess I just never allowed myself to want them. Because it’s terrifying.”

“It is terrifying, and you don’t even have to be pregnant or give birth.” Amy laughs. “But we’ve done so much scarier stuff.”

“We’re a good team”, he agrees. “If I’d raise kids with anyone, it’d be you for sure.”

“Ditto”, she grins. “Out of curiosity - did you have curly hair as a baby?”

“Are you saying you want to have kids with me just so you can pass on my beautiful genes, Santiago?”

“Oh yeah, that’s totally the only reason.”

“Knew it. From what I’ve seen of your brothers’ kids - and the baby pictures your brothers have shown me to embarrass you - yours aren’t that bad, either.”

Amy chuckles, running her right hand through the curls their kids may or may not inherit. “We’ll have cute kids.”

“We will.”

She kisses him, and he’s still scared, but much less so when her lips are against his and she’s standing a little bit on her toes and his hands are on her back while hers follow their usual habit of cupping his face. She kisses him, and the future makes him nervous, but he holds her in his arms and knows they’re doing it together. She kisses him, and in the end, he’s confident raising kids together with Amy Santiago is sure to be one of the scariest but most rewarding experiences of his life.

As long as he gets to do it with her, he can’t wait.

[steve0discusses]

Yugioh S4 Episode 2: Rebecca...She’s back, I guess?

So I got hella sick this week so it’s...just one update this weekend. The rest of the next update has the caps done but then the copy I was putting together got very distracted about which Founding Father was the hottest and I think that was the Dayquil? I barely know what day of the week it is rn. I think it’s Saturday, is it Saturday?

Anyway, we’re battling that Monocle guy. Gurimo? Yeah his name is Gurimo. I honestly can’t remember him saying his name even once, so thanks Google for the help.

It’s a new season so not only did we suck all the power out of God Cards but now you can’t use them anymore with the new glowing green mechanic. The writers really did just...a lot to make it so God Cards are no longer relevant. Like they buried them so far.

This guy repeats himself quite a lot about being soul hungry? Yeah I watched all of Sailor Moon so like, I’m super up to date on my soul energy anime. I’ve walked this path before I know it well.

(read more under the cut)

Such a shame we can’t read those stats which may just be Hebrew letters in lorem ipsum (note that when Pegasus makes you a card, you don’t get to have stats) but it’s nice to know that, if you wanted to, you could play Rex and Weevil in universe of the show and something would happen.

Anyway, Gurimo lost, his eyes went all glowy red at some point, and decided to go out throwing stuff because it’s Yugioh and you have to throw cards at least 3 times a season, its in the contract.

Don’t think about physics guys, just trust that cards can do this on a roof where there’s no wind for some reason.

And then he went up in a green ball of glory. It was nice of the green beam of soul energy to wait until the impossible card toss was over.

Lol this show and how it just kills people on screen just...all the time. All the freakin time. Can’t show a gun, but murder as many people as you like. It’s OK, his soul is in a paper card so he’s not *really* dead. That won’t terrify children under the age of 10.

So Pharaoh decides to do the tactic of telling a bunch of motorcycle gang edgy kids (adults? not sure about those three) that stealing is Wrong.

They also, youknow, are implicit in murdering Rex and Weevil but youknow, stealing is wrong and the God Cards don’t belong to them and Pharaoh is shook that these kids won’t keep their end of their bargain that whoever wins the card fight keeps the cards.

So basically Gurimo died for freakin nothing.

Welcome back to the fold, Rex and Weevil, apparently this show isn’t done with you yet. I was pretty much done with both of you 3 seasons ago but alas, you will be back, with your raspy as hell voice acting, at the beginning of S5. I am sure of it.

(PS I just noticed I spelled resurrect wrong and I know I should go back into photoshop but like...I’m too sick to care at this moment so maybe I’ll change it in the next week or so I dunno, I’m just gonna post this thing so I can feel like I did something productive today.)

And so these kids decide the police are never going to freakin show up to the rooftop brawl where a guy super died and several children were endangered and a huge beam of light you can see from space went out like a bat signal to the rest of the city of “ps, something bad is happening over here, if any of you adults feel like helping out these four high school drop outs? Nobody?”

First, they decide to keep this horrible thing:

(which second thought is not SO surprising, because Yugi clearly loves hoarding dead people)

And then this other horrible thing:

Why would you keep these? Why would you do this?

I mean Yugi’s got such specific dark tastes that I wouldn’t be half surprised if his closet is filled with dozens and dozens of rat skulls he collected from the subway station.

And then the next day, Yugi decided to just like watch Joey and Tristan dangle Rex and Weevil like puppets. It just seemed super unnecessary.

Like Yugi isn’t even Pharaoh right now but he’s absolutely fine with these guys getting shook around. Yugi is all sorts of gray area in this show and I’m glad that’s never changed although sometimes it’s like “Is Yugi slowly turning into a mob boss? Because I’m down, but also somewhat concerned?”

Anyway, the God Cards aren’t even here anymore so we say farewell to Rex and Weevil who seem just as confused at how the hell you can steal a God Card as we are.

*not entirely sure where Rex and Weevil are from. I’ve been assuming the UK or the US but like...maybe they live here? I don’t even know.

And then Chibiusa--I mean Rebecca showed up.

Ah, remember this plot point from S1? What if she shows up and (according to Bro) Just never leaves?

I’m coming to terms with this. Anyway, Rebecca’s only purpose seems to be as a part of a (love????) triangle (square????) between Yugi and Tea but like...

And maybe this is the Dayquil speaking but...

Is this even weird?

Seriously, they’re family friends, why is this weird? Maybe it’s because one of Rebecca’s core traits is that she’s American and I’m also an American so I don’t even see a problem with Rebecca and how she acts (since she’s a freakin child with a crush on a card-famous person) but like what small child see her friend she hasn’t seen in 2 years and is not going to hug him?

Anyway, Yugi was the worst to not remember this chick. Maybe his brain looks like a box of loose packing peanuts (I say as a metaphor remembering that his brain literally looks like an Escher painting screensaver), but he can’t remember this chick from just 2 years ago that he gave his rarest card to? The chick who’s grandfather had that blue-eyes he gave to Yugi’s Grandfather? The chick who’s grandfather helped his grandfather get that necklace around Yugi’s neck? The necklace he wears every single day and is super cursed by?

How do you forget the Hawkins when they are part of the reason everyone thinks you’re losing your mind?

But I guess she looks older now and got a pair of glasses (bifocals????). She No longer has her hair in pigtails but, I dunno, she looks basically the same to me since she’s still about the same size as Yugi but wtv.

And then Yugioh was like “Listen everyone, we’re very tired of all of your angry reviews, and I see y’all are saying we never do romance, well get ready, we know how to do romance really well, get ready for it, we can make things move faster than a snail in wet cement, just watch.”

Because somehow, after Yugi was the biggest asshole ever to Rebeca, I guess she figured like “well, at least you’re still card famous”

You know what? I have several girlfriends who I am not dating, but, if it’s been a couple weeks since they’ve seen me last, will give me a huge as drunk hug on my arm and go “MY LOVE MY GIRLFRIEND MARRY ME” and like...Again I’m American so maybe this is just my culture here in California?

I’d like to believe that Rebecca is just messing with these people because she can.

Ps I’m pretty sure this girl was 6 last time we saw her but they decided...we better age her up if it’s gonna be a romance but they only made her 12. OK show. Yugi’s pushing 17 at this point so like...barely even logical. I’d say legal but I’m thinking more of just logic at this point because the last time we saw this girl she was holding a teddy bear (which we can guarantee is probably still shoved into her luggage)

...OK, show...

Now listen listen listen. All ships are fine here. I’m not gonna go after shipping because like, c’mon, it’s 2019. If you stan Rebecca and Yugi, go for it, why not? I’ve said it before, and my feelings haven’t really changed, I’m immune to shipping, so I feel absolutely no different with Rebecca and Yugi than I do with Tea and Yugi. I think Tea makes more sense, but that’s not saying very much because literally anyone else on this cast who isn’t related to him could probably work. Go ahead and bring back Mako Tsunami. There’d be a fun pair.

Bro got very excited when I mentioned a MakoxYugi pairing just now ps.

But it really does feel like this ship has the dynamic of the Usagi/Chibiusa/Mamaru ship from Sailor Moon where Usagi was always jealous of small little Chibiusa spending time with Mamaru who was her OWN DAD. Why would you EVER be jealous of a 12 year old girl hanging with your boy...friend? Tea is a 17ish year old ballerina who never, ever wears full pants. She’d have this in the bag if she ever decided to like...do anything with...this. And I don’t blame Tea for never doing anything with “this” because like...look at “this.”

I just don’t think the writing team knows how to write a competent love triangle (square) but...this exists now. They even had Rebecca decide to dress nearly identically to Tea as a demonstration of her devotion but like...it honestly comes off more that this small child just admires Tea. Because she’s 12.

Yugi is just babysitting this girl for his Grandfather and it feels like the writing team just had to have the girls be all catty at eachother. Because it’s a kids show. Gotta have those girls all catty. Can’t let them be friends.

Anyway, back at this museum that these kids visit so freakin often, you’d think they’d change their home address, we meet up with the granddads in question.

Ah, now Ishizu is no longer with us, Exposition Grandpa is here to take the torch. Can’t wait for that.

And I made his font gray because I freakin give up. Grandpa Hawkins might change his font color every episode. I...I’m figuring it out.

And then, every helicopter in Domino shed a single tear.

Wow. I’ve been so mad for so many seasons that they never use a freakin seaplane to cross the ocean that when they actually do I’m like...kind of disappointed?

I mean it’s not shaped like a dragon, but I will take this perfectly acceptable seaplane.

I can’t believe they drew a normal ass plane. on this show.

*Waits patiently for it to turn into a blimp next episode*

Anyway, if you just got here, this is a link to read all the caps in chrono order. There’s over 3 seasons of this. Y’all I’ve done over 100 episodes.

[zetalial]

I can’t stand Ling

Random rant about how much I dislike Ling Yao. Sorry if you like Ling, I just can’t. Feel free to argue with me if you like - this ended up way, way longer and more detailed than it needed to be. I try not to dwell on characters I dislike so don’t expect a dozen more spite posts - this is a one off. I decided I’d feel better by writing it out.

But I really do dislike him. He annoyed me from the first moment he appeared in episode 15 of BH where he behaves absolutely obnoxiously throughout the entire episode and continued to annoy right up until he got consumed with Greed. And his ending annoyed me.  

Part 1 - First appearance

First impression are everything, right? I’m willing to change my mind if a character has hidden depths of course but if their character is plain irritating, that impression tends to last.

Okay, so he’s passed out in a random alley and Ed and Al find him - which is by the way a huge plot contrivance. They’re in Rush Valley in the South and Ling will explicitly tell them that he travelled to Amestris via the Xerxes ruins which are the North-East. And he seems to be heading to Central, there’s no reason for him to be in Rush valley let alone in a random alley alone so Ed and Al can help him. (This is a minor point though, I can deal with a couple of contrivances.)

After Ed and Al help him out, giving him food, he asks about the Philosopher’s stone and Ed tells them they don’t know anything - and the Philosopher’s stone is evil by the way, seeking power from the stone is dangerous - will Ling ever have to question his desire for the Stone and the source of its power? Ha, no.  

So Ling decides to sic his ninja bodyguards on Ed and Al! They said they didn’t know anything! Given how rare information on the stone is, that’s completely reasonable but oh Ling just knows that they’re hiding something about it? And thinks attacking two kids he knows nothing about is a great idea?

Lan Fan and Fuu do not hold back either, they use explosives and knives and cause loads of damage in their fight when Ed and Al haven’t even done anything! It’s a cool fight but the circumstances make me hate it! We get a shot of Ling casually eating a big meal while this is all going on to show how little he cares. Oh and he makes Ed pay the bill for it.

When Ed and Al do manage to win, Ling is completely unapologetic and allows Ed to get all the blame for the damages he caused when he sent his people to attack Ed and Al. When Ed comes back to see Winry, she is furious at him for damaging his automail again and Ling’s just there again, casually breaking in to Ed’s place, insisting on tagging along even though Ed tells him not to. Ling doesn’t face a single consequence for any of this by the way. Ling does explain his status here explaining that he wants the Stone to become emperor of Xing which is... yeah still quite a selfish goal.

And then there’s the conversation at the end of the episode where Fuu asks Ling why he’s putting up with Ed and Al, who are beneath him. Eh? This is Ling being nice? Ed and Al have been fairly nice, helping him in that alley, listening to his story and their anger was entirely justified at how obnoxious Ling has been this entire episode. But oh Ling is supposedly bowing his head to someone so far beneath him? Ling realises there’s bigger things than a little humility when his clan’s fate is in the balance? What do appearances matter then?

So you’re telling me that being the most obnoxious and annoying person ever was deliberate? All he achieved was making Ed and Al and me absolutely hate him! I’m going to ignore this conversation about Ling seeming wise and having a bigger plan because it doesn’t match up with anything else in the entire episode.

Now, I don’t mind flawed characters - but Ling never gets called out on any of his behaviour and never gets asked to change. Lan Fan is ridiculously devoted to him right from the beginning and the only way we see it as a flaw is that she’s so defensive she loses her cool just from hearing Ling get insulted. Quite why she is so loyal is never explored and I know she’s only a side character but you know I could really use a legitimate reason to like Ling.

Part 2 - Ling’s leadership?

Okay, his first appearance was just a comedy episode so I’ll just be kind and dismiss it. What’s Ling like when the plot gets a bit more serious then? In Central, Ed and Al hatch a plan to catch a homunculus by getting Scar to attempt to kill them and Ling volunteers to help fight the homunculi while Ed and Al deal with Scar.

So Ling and Lan Fan get into a fight with Wrath and Gluttony and Ling reveals that he’s also a superb fighter too because why not? Like, Lan Fan takes a nasty injury from Wrath but Ling manages to hold him off and runs away while carrying Lan Fan. That’s downright crazy alone - that Ling is such a competent fighter he can hold off Wrath while carrying Lan Fan! Isn’t Lan Fan meant to be the trained bodyguard?

Okay so his fighting skills are ridiculous, fine it’s a shonen anime, everyone can fight, whatever. It’s the conversation with Wrath that really gets to me though.

Wrath tells him that if he let go of Lan Fan, he might have a have a chance of escaping. Ling interprets this weirdly and goes on about how a true ruler cares about his subjects and so would never abandon his people and says that Bradley is no true King.

Shut up Ling. Bradley isn’t hiding behind others here, he’s fighting you one-on-one, not sacrificing minions. And you aren’t Amestrian so you have no reason to know about Bradley’s other decisions as a leader so how can you so confidently criticise him? (Bradley is an interesting character who totally shines when being challenged by the heroes but I hate Ling doing it here.) I mean, isn’t Ling the one who orders his minions to fight while he eats breakfast and lets someone else pay for the consequences?

Okay, so I shouldn’t take that fight seriously because it’s not meant to be serious. How about the current one? Ling volunteered to help with Ed’s plan and that lead to Lan Fan risking her life for him! Sure, Lan Fan agreed because she’s stupidly loyal but this was Ling’s plan and she got hurt! Her injuries are as much his fault as anyone’s.

Ling choosing not to abandon her is nice, sure. But given she got hurt following him, I’d call it being a decent human being, rather than a true paragon of leadership! And that’s if I’m to accept that any of this makes one particularly good for being a leader anyway. Ling is kind of extremely reckless. Did I mention the part where he disappeared on his bodyguards just because, leading them to worry as he was passed out on the street in the middle of Central? And then got arrested? Gosh he’s irresponsible. He is so lucky that worked out so easily.

Bradley doesn’t refute Ling’s words, just saying something about how there are no true kings in this world while Ling attempts to escape, still carrying Lan Fan. And there’s another annoying plot hole here where Lan Fan lets off a flashbomb and Ling takes the chance to escape but Wrath reveals his other eye under the eyepatch, preventing Ling’s escape. And then it cuts to the next scene and... Ling has escaped the room!

He’s still running away from Wrath while carrying Lan Fan and despite how fast Wrath is, Ling manages to get pretty far away somehow. Far enough that Lan Fan successfully cuts off her arm, then they tie it to a dog, and escape through the sewers all before Wrath catches up to him. This whole sequence was all off-screen!

In case we haven’t got enough of Ling being awesome, our next scene of him has him jumping out of the sewers with his shirt off where he proceeds to capture Gluttony.  Heh, I guess there’s nothing wrong with that but I can’t help but feel like I’m really supposed to like Ling here and love the badass moments and I cannot. I’m upset that the scene where Ling is forced tie her arm to a dog while Lan Fan is bleeding out beside him was cut as that’s the kind of scene that would get me to actually like him. Not scenes of him being an awesome fighter.

Part 3 - The part I don’t hate

Ling is a character with flaws and room for growth, which is something I can appreciate. But these earlier flaws are presented as just comic relief. That’s what annoys me - I usually like characters who can be obnoxious jerks so long as their flaws aren’t just blatantly laughed off as a joke.

In the next few episode we do get to see a more serious and conflicted Ling. This is Ling at his most interesting. He feels guilty about what Lan Fan’s done for him when he was too weak to do so himself and is determined that her sacrifice has meaning. So he’s got the hero flaw of caring too much.

This leads to an interesting conflict where Ling, Roy and Ed all fight over Gluttony and his philosopher's stone. Ed wants it for Alphonse and points out it was his plan. Roy wants it to heal Havoc. Ling wants it to become emperor and argues about what Lan Fan’s sacrificed so that they could catch the homunculus. Sadly, Gluttony breaks free then so this argument isn’t explored any further here.

At the end of the series we see how they’ve changed in this regard. Ling finally has a stone and even though he’s just lost Greed to another sacrifice, he freely offers the stone to Edward to save Al. Ed refuses. So this stuff is all interesting and I really do wish the conflict and resolution wasn’t so brief (and that Roy wasn’t just given a stone to cure his blindness but I digress.)

Next, Ling gets swallowed by Gluttony and there’s more comedy which is still a touch irritating but not nearly so bad as his first few appearances. Ling collapses again with no energy and this should be serious but it’s still presented as comic again. I can’t take Ling’s fainting spells seriously as it’s played for comedy every. Single. Time. That aside, Ling is at his most tolerable here and it’s interesting how determined he is against Envy in contrast to Ed’s horror at Envy’s true form slowing him down. When they’re out, Ling distrust of Father is also good.

And finally we get to Ling accepting Greed into his body. Again he’s being super-reckless and he’s sort of being called out on this as Ed urges him to fight but Ling decides not to. Again we get this characterisation of Ling as someone willing to surrender and lose face to get what he wants. As he said to Fuu when he first met Ed, appearances don’t matter in the long run. He can bow his head when the situation requires. Fighting Greed here would be pointless.

(This is in contrast to Ed who is prideful and can never accept defeat. In Gluttony’s stomach we see him marching relentlessly onward even though its futile. Later, we see Ed’s growth where he agrees to be Greed’s minion, letting go of his useless pride as he realises he can gain something by humbling himself.)

I wish this was explored a bit more too though. It feels more like Ling’s recklessly jumping at the chance to gain immortality despite having been told repeatedly that its a bad idea and, though it seems like he faces consequences in getting consumed by Greed, it eventually works out quite well for him. (Okay that’s a bit harsh, I love Greed’s struggle.) And it seems like its more like luck than any cleverness on his part, which is kinda irksome with how lucky Ling is generally.

-

So yeah, I like where he’s serious and gets challenged but I feel like it rarely happens. Ling’s other flaws just feel like they’re all comedy where the joke is that he’s rude and obnoxious and pushy and gets away with it. None of his other appearances stop his personality from grating on me. At the beginning of the series, he thinks he’s going to find the secret to immortality and be a great leader and apparently he’s completely correct. Not that I want him to fail, I just don’t like his initial character when I feel like I’m supposed to and most of the character development with Greedling feels like its solely for Greed. Eh I’ve rambled on enough now.

I actually love Greed’s character, he’s really interesting and I adore his development. My hatred is purely directed at Ling.

[dappercritter]

what are your favorite lemon demon songs and why :D ?

Glad you asked! I’m always happy to talk about Lemon Demon music. (Even though it took me forever to respond. I am sorry about that!)

So without further ado, my favourite Lemon Songs are:

The Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny. This is basically one of those big, increasingly insane, multi-franchise mashups mega battle everyone made up when they were a kid set to a funky beat. How can you not love it? Another thing is that it all starts with Godzilla and Batman showing up and ticking each other off—not only is it hilarious imaging two of my childhood icons going at it, but it reminds me of a plan for an actual Godzilla vs. Batman crossover! …Okay, maybe I’m reading into things here.

The Only House That’s (Not) on Fire Yet. This is one of Lemon Demon’s more chill songs and I like that. It has all the fixing of your average LD song (snappy wordplay, musing on life, aloof singer character who may or may not be in his right mind,) but it has a calmer energy. When I listen to it, it feels like I’m wandering the house on a cool autumn evening, looking out on the neighbourhood, which is currently on fire, while plotting what to do next…

Reaganomics. This resonates with me for a couple of reasons: 1) I love me some criticism of short-sighted economic policies! 2) The lyrics of the song, while obviously making fun of how Reagan’s free-market economics were a nice idea that went nowhere (or at least nowhere good from what I heard), tell the story of a man who wants to save his love and his country from the oppression of a faulty capitalist economy that suffocates its citizens, when really he’s just making promises that he hopes everyone will believe. I’m no government official, but sometimes when I see everyone I know and love being run into the ground as the world seemingly plummets in an economic freefall brought on by rampant capitalism, I just can’t help but want to jump and help them. Oh, and this song is another slapper.

Touch-Tone Telephone. The hook is so infectious, I love the instrumentation, and it has a cute story to go with it: paranoid conspiracy theorist tries to get in touch with a radio host. What I love about it is how you can read into it. Is the theorist trying to prove that he’s actually onto something and not some crackpot, so that he can save the world and hopefully get some respect at long last? Or is he trying to admit his feeling for the radio host without sounding like a hopeless lunatic? …while also trying to save the world. It’s great fun to listen to, and it reminds me of some of the awkward conversations I’ve had with my friends as I try to get my convoluted point across.

Knife Fight. You can’t talk about this one without giving away the surprise, but let’s just I like how well it matches my two sides: edgy and silly.

Brodyquest. This song makes me want to watch Adrien Brody movies, dress up as Adrien Brody, and then parade through the streets with a keytar and an Oscar. Sometimes that’s all you need in a song.

White Bread Boyfriend. I’m a cishet white dude and this song is tailor-made to insult me, and every guy like me—and by Jove, it makes it sound good! Seriously though, this is literally the anthem for all the crappy, “mediocre” white guys who think they’re the most romantic human on the planet when, in reality, they’re self-centered D-bags with some obnoxiously low standards. Trust me when I say there’s nothing more cathartic than listening somebody make fun of these wankers. Not to mention it’s a helpful reminder for what not to do for if and when this wanker meets a girl who actually likes him. (*wink, wink*)

No Eyed-Girl. If there’s one thing I love it’s a good love song. If there’s another thing I love it’s the love between two people who come from two different worlds, and/or two people of different species. Especially one’s where one loves the other even though they’re an eldritch creature whose world can melt our brains. Wanting to be with someone, even if physical contact with you results in total vaporization, is beautiful. It’s the kind of devotion you just don’t see in love songs these days.

Cabinet Man. Without a doubt one of my favourites. It’s a fun song with a catchy beat about a horrible thing that happens to a man who loses his humanity as he turns into a hideous half-arcade-cabinet-half-human zombie. It’s a great showcase of Neil’s ability to write something that reads like a Stephen King story but plays like an absolute banger. It’s black comedy at its finest as the singer goes through the ups and downs of becoming a living arcade cabinet. Also, I will never get the chorus out of my head.

Aurora Borealis. This was the first Lemon Demon song that I listened to, and since I have a habit of making my first exposure to something my favourite, this is probably my all-time favourite. That and I’m a huge sucker for Christmas stuff. I love how it’s so sweet and so creepy at the same time, with a (dubiously human) guy trying to enjoy a romantic Christmas Eve with his lover amidst the end of the world. The ending tugs at my heartstrings, too, not just because Christmas is being marked by an eldritch apocalypse (actually that’s kind of cool), but because despite his best efforts, the singer’s plans falls apart and he’s left alone in the Yuletide hellscape. The electronic instrumentation and the sleigh bells make for a great sound, too.

Honourable Mention: It’s About to Get Weird. Remember what I said about firsts and favourites with “Aurora Borealis”? Well, I have a confession to make: Although that was my first Lemon Demon song, it wasn’t my first Neil Cicierega song—this was. I’m a huge Gravity Falls fan and when I first heard this song, I was genuinely disappointed they didn’t use it. In addition to being a great villain song for Bill, I love that it mixes gleeful showtunes with the most demented imagery; it’s not just Bill’s kind of song, it’s my kind of song, as well as a perfect introduction to Neil’s talents as singer and songwriter. Well, even if we didn’t hear it Weirdmaggeddon, at least we can listen to it whenever we want.

[vyladromeave]

Mr. Zvahl has updated!

Chapter 6: Forage and Found

(Read the full thing on AO3!)

(A/N: nbvGJDFSFSD THIS IS SO LATE IM SORRY. It was TECHNICALLY done like a week or so ago but it was under 1k words and i just couldnt Post It mnbdsfghfsd. ANYWAYS now its nearly 2k so hopefully thatll make up for the wait nfdsbghdjsf. i have been Neglecting Zoey so now you have to read So Much about my beautiful elf wife mndsfbhjsfdk. not much else to say, ill edit this if i can think of anything important. Also Once Again gentle reminder tht i would seriously reccomend reading this on ao3 instead because tumblr formatting makes the spacing Whack but whatever man u do u,,,, you do u,,,,,, dshjgsfd ANYWAYS Hope u enjoy!!)

.

They had been walking for some time now. She had explained on the way out there that the path used to be much clearer, but too much overgrowth in the area had made reaching difficult. It was still possible, it just took extra time. In their case, it had taken a good half-hour at least. (It could have taken longer, but he wasn’t too good at keeping track of the time these days.)

As they approached he wasn’t quite sure what to expect, but now that they were there, he realized it wasn’t actually that different from what he’d imagined. His only experience in portals were the ones that lead to the nether- it somewhat shocked him to see that this portal wasn’t much different. It was about the same size and shape, though the material was different and it gave off an energy that was much less malevolent. Even then, its aura made the hair on the back of his neck stand on end, and it wasn’t even activated.

“The portal leads to the Irene Dimension. That’s where we believe Aphmau, and all those that went with her, are trapped.” she continued.

He looked to her, silently asking permission if he could get a closer look, although she didn’t seem to notice. He took it as a yes. He approached the portal to get a closer look while she talked.

“I’ve been working for nearly a decade to find a way to open it again. Nothing has worked so far, but I’m getting close. I can feel it.”

“How so?”

She was somewhat thrown off by how direct his question is. “I- well- when I first started working on this… I didn’t really know what I was doing? I was just throwing things together, I didn’t understand any of it. And now… well, there’s a lot I still don’t understand, I won’t lie about that. Emmalyn was our resident Irene expert, but we lost her to the portal too. But I’ve also learned- I know what I’m doing now, I know the end goal. I just need to figure out how to get there.”

He nods, though his focus is still mostly devoted to the portal. He understands what she means now when she said there was a lot she didn’t understand- if he was in Zoey’s place he wouldn’t even know where to start. It takes him a solid minute to recognize that no, those “scratches” he spotted on the portal are words, and in some language he has no clue of recognizing. He shakes his head. He would love to help out, of course he would, but he isn’t cut out for this.

“Well, you’re the barrier magicks user. If anyone could do it, it’s you.”

She sighs and nods. “I suppose so. I’m not sure if it’s a good thing, but it’s better than nothing.”

“Of course it’s a good thing. The town just needs to have faith in you.”

“It’s been ten years. There’s not much faith left to go around.”

“Well, what about you? Do you think you can do it? Bring them home?”

She pauses for a second, but nods. “Yes. I do.”

“Then that’s good enough for me. That settles it.”

She gives him a look and tilts her head, confused. “Settles what, exactly?”

“I think I’d like to stay here. In Phoenix Drop. At least until everyone returns.”

“Oh!” She smiles, but took another moment to process and “Oh.” Her face drops. “I- I mean that’s great, I’m glad you’d like to stay, but- this could take years. Decades. Centuries, even. You could be long dead by the time everyone is back here.”

“That’s fine. It’s worth the wait.”

She was startled by his ease in acceptance. “That’s- I mean- you could-“ she takes a breath to calm herself. “Alright. Welcome to Phoenix Drop, Mr. Zvahl.”

~~~

She had agreed to take him out to the portal if he would do some work for her in return. Nothing too strenuous, she wasn’t cruel, but it was nice to have help every once in a while.

For as good as he was in navigating the forest, he knew next to nothing about the plant life within it. Or plant life in general. She spent a solid ten minutes explaining to him what they were looking for, “Four leaves, notched edges, somewhat pointy at the ends. You’ll know you have the right plant if the base of the leaf is much thicker than the edges.” His understanding seemed to be shaky at best, but he didn’t want to waste more time when they were supposed to be gathering. And so he wandered north, she went a bit south, and hoped that he had at least a basic understanding of what they were looking for.

She hadn’t found too many- but she figured as much. It took some time to get to the better spots where the plant often grew in, which they had instead spent observing the portal (as if she didn’t spend enough time on that blasted thing already). So she paid it no mind when he was late meeting back up by a couple minutes. And then ten went past. Then fifteen. It was just enough time to make her start to worry when she’d spotted him returning. That was another odd thing about him, sometimes he was easier to spot with your eyes than to notice with your ears. He was oddly quiet, inhumanly stealthy. She’d wanted to say he was just good at that sort of thing, but what kind of person can disappear in a forest but can’t tell an acorn from a rock? Either he was oddly talented, or there was something even odder going on here, and it bugged her a bit too much.

Her mind was taken off the question when he’d stopped in front of her and she got a good look at him. She understood now why he was late- he seemed uncomfortable, and kept shifting the rather large pile of plants he gathered around. It was a bit hard to tell with the gloves he wore, but she swore she could see splotches of red creeping up his arms.

“Is this stuff we’re gathering… supposed to be itchy?”

And just like that, her suspicions were confirmed. “Well- yes, that is normal for that plant. But it’s also not the plant I told you to gather.”

“It’s not?” He said, looking down at the bundles of leaves in his arms.

“No, it isn’t. I sent you to gather lushsprout. The plants you’re holding look like poison ivy.”

A blank expression slowly grew on his face as he stared through the plant he’d gathered and into the middle distance. A look Zoey could only describe as regret took hold, and he dropped everything he had spent so long gathering as the name finally registered in his brain.

“One moment.” he said and rushed off in the direction of what Zoey could only assume was the nearest water source, a desperate attempt to wash off the red splotches that had already begun to form on his skin. Zoey couldn’t help but snort- it was the most emoted she had seen him ever, and yet it was all so comical.

Well, there was nothing comical about poison ivy, she supposed. It was mildly annoying at best, and painful at worst- but judging by his seeming unawareness she figured he would be alright this time. It would certainly make a good story for later, at least. They had done enough herb gathering for the day.

~~~

They made their way back to Phoenix Drop, recuperating at Aphmau’s house. He washed his hands and arms once again, as well as his gloves in order to make sure they were completely poison-ivy-free. (He’d gathered too much to be completely unscathed, but it was something he could deal with.) Zoey made him tea once again, and Vylad didn’t have the heart to turn her down. Of all the citizens of Phoenix Drop, he’d grown to like her and Dante the most.

She was kind and thoughtful, and understanding of his quiet demeanor. Where Dante often barged in and forced conversation, Zoey understood the importance of silence. They hadn’t physically talked much, though he discovered that he’d somewhat enjoyed just hanging out around her, helping her gather herbs, looking at her miniature garden, whatever trivial way they decided to pass the time. She was certainly more suspicious of him than Dante was (so perhaps she was smarter too), but Vylad figured it was justified and tried to not let it bother him much.

In a strange turn of events, he ended up the one to break the silence.

~~~

“...Just how often does Kawaii~Chan bake?”

“Well, she’s been doing it less often lately, since she’s got a child to look after now, but…”

“So not too often, then?”

She could’ve sworn he sounded almost disappointed. “Gods no, Kawaii~Chan is an unstoppable force when it comes to cooking. The day there is a force strong enough to prevent her is probably the day the world ends.”

She chuckled a bit at her own joke, Zvahl never laughed (or reacted much to anything at all, she’d noticed), so she did for both of them. Maybe it was a bit conceited, but in her eyes it let them both enjoy it, even if he was reluctant to show such feelings. “Why, were you hoping to get some of her sweets yourself?”

“Uh-”

“Have you ever even had her cooking? It’s very good, I’m just not sure why you’d be so interested…”

“Yes, I did. At that breakfast, about a week ago.”

“You’ve been craving her cooking for a week? ”

“Well-”

Any form of excuse was interrupted by more of her laughter, this time it was entirely for herself. Was he so reserved that it had taken him a week to ask about something as trivial as baking? She glanced over him once again to make sure she wasn’t missing anything- only finding what she decided was a hint of embarrassment. He opened his mouth to speak, and she nearly found herself laughing again when he closed it and glanced away.

She stifled her laughter to save him from any more embarrassment, and gave him a knowing wink. “Don’t worry, I’ll put in a good word with her for you if you want. She loves to bake after all- I’m sure she’d be happy to make you something.”

It was muffled by the scarf which most of his face had retreated into, but through the cloth she swore she heard him give a mumbled, “... Thank you...”

Perhaps she was wrong. He had plenty of emotion. Zoey would just need to learn where to look.

~~~

[ettadunham]

A Buffy rewatch 5x18 Intervention

aka is weird love better than no love???

Welcome to this dailyish text post series where I will rewatch an episode of Buffy and go on an impromptu rant about it for an hour. Is it about one hyperspecific thing or twenty observations? 10 or 3k words? You don’t know! I don’t know!!! In this house we don’t know things.

And in today’s episode, Spike does something super creepy and surprisingly decent at the same time, which pretty much sums up his whole character. Meanwhile Buffy should go to therapy, and Sarah Michelle Gellar seems to be having the time of her life as BuffyBot.

You know, it’s my fault. I got into a rant about how Tara is the only one who always treated Buffy without judgement and with understanding, and the next episode on my rewatch naturally ended up being Intervention. The one that has the joke of Tara trying to be considerate of Buffy’s situation post-Joyce’s death, and then going “are you kidding, she’s nuts” upon the whole revelation that Buffy was supposedly sleeping with Spike.

(Which kind of has the same energy as Uncle Iroh’s “No, she’s crazy and she needs to go down” from A:TLA if you ask me tbh.)

But you know what, I’m still gonna be doubling down on my Buffy/Tara feelings, because Tara’s not wrong in assuming that it was a weird turn for Buffy to take at this point in her character arc. And a season from now, when Buffy will actually be sleeping with Spike, and judgement will be the last thing she’ll need, Tara will be right there to offer her understanding.

Anyway, that’s it for that segue. Let’s talk Buffy.

It’s all fun and games, with me talking about my own emotional numbness, until Buffy starts repeating those words back at me. There really is a reason why I feel so close to Buffy as a character to this very day - and in many ways, now more so than ever.

I talked about this a lot with Riley’s departure, about how that whole conflict and Buffy’s emotional unavailability wasn’t about Riley (just as Riley’s insecurities weren’t really about Buffy), but I love that we’re exploring this out loud now.

It’s just good storytelling and character building. We understand that Buffy has been closed off for a while now. Going back to the Riley angle, I will say that while it wasn’t Riley’s responsibility to make their relationship work, he certainly didn’t understand Buffy’s struggles at the time. He was too caught up in his issues to realize and internalize that it wasn’t about him.

So yeah, that relationship wasn’t going to work out, but it still weighs on Buffy that she felt unable to open up and take that step to try. It’s not about Riley, or even romantic relationships in general. Buffy fears that she’s unable to express her feelings to all of her loved ones.

She’s even scared that her mother didn’t know how much she loved her. (That’s absolutely not a soul-crushing thought that makes me over-identify with Buffy’s current emotional state on a whole new level. It’s fine. I’m fine.)

Buffy then attributes this process of her “turning into stone” to her being the Slayer. Which... I’d argue isn’t truly the case for her, both in the story and on a metaphorical level. At least not directly. What made Buffy become more guarded was trauma, plain and simple. Being a Slayer is a part of many of her traumas, but in itself, it’s neutral.

At least that’s my interpretation. For the most part. We’ll find out of course in season 7 that the Slayer power actually comes from demons, which re-affirms Dracula’s point earlier in this season about there being “darkness” to Buffy’s power. Then again, as season 7 generally revolves around the theme of power, one might ask if power can even ever be neutral?

We’ll circle back to that in season 7.

The point being is that while there are definitely darker elements attached to being the Slayer, in this case, Buffy misses a nuance by singling out Slayerhood as the root cause of her emotional detachment. Sure, being a Slayer who kills things doesn’t help ones mental health - but that’s also because it’s a traumatizing experience.

You need therapy, Buffy.

Which I guess is kind of what this Slayer quest thing works as. Kind of. When the First Slayer starts talking about how Buffy’s full of love, and how she just had some painful experiences that now stops her from opening up, and how she’ll needs to embrace all of that, pain and all... That was nice. It was a nice validation for Buffy about her feelings.

But then it was all “love will lead you to your gift” and “death is your gift” and “our time’s up, your questions were answered, now scram”, so that was some overall shitty therapy session if we’re being honest here.

And then there’s Spike.

I have no idea what to do with Spike.

The whole Buffybot thing is super gross, and just thinking about how Warren programmed and probably tested all of that... Yikes, yikes, yikes.

Is it funny and well-written? Yes, it is, I’m not even gonna lie. But it’s also just super gross.

By far the most interesting scene that happens because of this whole scenario is that last one between Buffy and Spike. I like how it’s set up in the script too. I mean, well, “like” may not be the right word, as part of that is Xander making this whole argument about “poor Spike, he’s got beat up and his toy is gone, boo-hoo”... But I like that that’s the red herring to the audience to make us believe that they actually fixed up Buffybot and sent her back to Spike.

As opposed to what actually happens with Buffy pretending to be Buffybot to try and find out what Spike told Glory. Which is also set up by the same scene between the Scoobies.

Watching that scene, knowing that it’s Buffy is a very different experience. You start noticing the thoughtful looks Buffy’s giving to Spike, and the ways she’s manipulating the conversation to make sure that she gets an honest response out of him. It’s intriguing, to say the least.

In an episode that’s filled with Spike at its worst, this one scene is somehow enough to bring me back to that porch scene between the two. As Buffy puts it, what Spike’s done for her and Dawn in this episode, and his words to who he thought was Buffybot about his devotion to Buffy were real. And Buffy accepts that.

The kiss itself gives me a pause though. It feels too much like Spike is being rewarded for being a decent person for once, not ratting out a 14-year-old girl to a demon god. Especially since at this point, it doesn’t feel like something Buffy would initiate or want on her own.

Then again, it’s also a reveal. It’s how Buffy lets Spike know that he was being played, and that he’s not gonna get his sex robot back. But she won’t forget what he’s done for her and Dawn regardless.

And I think that once again, as with the porch scene, we can see that there’s a connection of honesty and understanding between Spike and Buffy’s characters that goes both ways. So maybe there’s a way to look at that kiss as not just a reward, and not as a confirmation of Buffy’s own feelings for Spike at this point... but as a sign of that connection.

Meanwhile Dawn’s kleptomania is becoming a problem. Giles is cooking dinner for Buffy and Dawn, and no one’s appreciating Tara’s protection spells. As is the case with many episodes of this season, there’s a lot of fun stuff going on with the entire gang and their dynamics, which I greatly enjoy.

Next episode is gonna be a bit of a tough one, especially since I plan to touch upon some super non-controversial fandom topics like Willow’s sexuality. Should I open up that can of worms? Probably not. But will I? Most likely.

Almost certainly.