#i love the basis of the story so much
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
god i love multiple whumpee situations where one whumpee is completely "trained" and eager and the second one HATES Whumper with all their heart
#rereading my very old very bad writing#and this is a trope i used#*sigh* time to rewrite it#i love the basis of the story so much#but the way i wrote it was very corny and awkward#it must be redone#>:)#whump#whump blog#whump community#whump scenario#whumpblr#whump tropes#whump writing#whumpee#emotional whump#whumper
125 notes
·
View notes
Text
I need a Dragon Ball spinoff about Android 17, like, yesterday. You’re telling me he became a park ranger, got married, had a kid, adopted two more, and you’re not even gonna show us what they LOOK LIKE?? You won’t even explain how it HAPPENED?? THAT SOUNDS SO FUN
I need a little comedy series about 17 being a husband/dad while trying to hold back his strength as a park ranger. Sprinkle in some angst of him relearning how to be human and MWAH 🤌
CINEMA
#dragon ball#dragon ball z#dragon ball super#db#dbz#dbs#android 17#they have the best basis for it too#like#have 17 feel guilty about 16#so much so that he takes 16s love for nature to heart#and decides to protect life#instead of destroy it#have him grapple with trying not to kill ppl#give him some trauma from gero#bring in 18 and Krillin once or twice for an akward Christmas dinner#maybe they adopted kids because it’s hard for androids to reproduce naturally?#like it’s possible but hard#or just write a story about them finding the kids in the forest or something#they have so much potential#I need a fanfic NOW
130 notes
·
View notes
Text
Wukong + Macaque headcanons
Wukong
- loves the feeling of flying, will often transform into a bird or use his cloud just to fly around and chill in the skies
- pretty much vegetarian in terms of diet (but prefers fruit over veggies), overall not a picky eater; when he doesn't eat peaches, he snacks on bugs and nuts instead
- really affectionate and very social due to spending so much time with his troop (also loves his troop very much and would throw hands with anyone that threatened them; would never say it out loud but it also includes Macaque)
- is actually pretty smart and has a lot of experience from the journey (but comes off as the opposite due to his lessons not being straightforward enough- but I think he gets better at it as he gets the hang of teaching MK stuff)
- became friends with Chang’E after the moon episode; they frequently do video calls or text each other things (maybe she even sends him peach flavored mooncakes somehow)
- his eyesight got borked from the trigram furnace so that makes it difficult for him to read (he later gets glasses for that exact reason)
- draws picturebooks for his monkeys and often does storytime sessions with them where he reads his books to the monkeys (I mean he's shown to be good at drawing in canon, so I think he could theoretically make picturebooks bc they rely on pictures more than blocks of text-); though before picturebooks were a thing, Wukong used to draw on scrolls in the past and told his stories that way, and Macaque would always join for storytime (he'd pretend that the monkeys dragged him into it just to tease Wukong, but he actually did enjoy Wukong's stories)
Macaque
- is a good swimmer & likes swimming a lot (diving underwater is his most favorite activity) (he finds it peaceful and noises are muffled for him underwater, so he occasionally goes off to dive in FMM's waters for an hour or two) (and he just stays there to relax the entire time)
- not a picky eater and can pretty much eat anything, but has a preference for meat; occasionally snacks on seeds and bananas
- good at singing and plays a few instruments in his free time
- his six ears are the same color as his skin, but they glow purple like his eyes when he uses the ears' abilities (heavily inspired by this)
- used his right hand more in the past, but has since trained himself to use his left hand more frequently (mainly because of his right eye)
- likes to write stories when inspiration hits him
- besides “Six Eared Macaque”, he has a personal name that he picked out for himself, but doesn’t like sharing it unless it’s someone he fully trusts and is close with (as of now, Wukong is the only one who knows that name, but he has never shared it with anyone else, even after their friendship was over)
- likes the sound of rain (and absolutely despises thunderstorms)
- very independent as a person and has taught himself things like sewing, making food, hunting + foraging, fighting off enemies, etc.
- the more "wild" one of the two (in the sense that he prefers nature to cities and has no problem sleeping in trees instead of beds)
#camu's rambles#lmk headcanons#lmk macaque#lmk sun wukong#these are mostly for-fun headcanons; so they don't have much basis from canon (sometimes)#relationship not specified bc i'm leaving it up to interpretation here#but overall I love playing around with the idea that they're both different and also the same in some aspects#it's spicier that way#(also while looking through my google docs with hcs i quickly realized that most of them are macaque centered)#(i think it's easy to tell who my most favorite character is because of that-)#(idk how to explain it but he's like the Monkey of OSP Journey to the West to me bc they're both cheeky menaces of their respective stories
46 notes
·
View notes
Text
been trying to finish this quick brenner post for like a week but i keep connecting more stuff that’s making me think about way bigger concepts i don’t wanna dive into again rn i hate this show man ughhgfggrfhhhb
#i love it most of the time it’s fun to be dramatic when u literally can’t stop the grind#my mom always says its like someones holdjng a gun to my head forcing me to analyze LMAO#i just have to Know. i can’t stop until i know#the problem is that every breadcrumb always leads to the way larger picture and core of the show and if u don’t have a good basis-#of your own theories and beliefs u just get lost in the sauce once it’s time to tie in something small to the core#there’s also just so. much. going on it’s like wait what Part of the core of the story do i connect this little thing to#literally a full time job thank god i’m unemployed
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
Serialized media is so good I love you serialized media. I love you experiencing a story slowly I love you waiting and building excitement and theorizing every week/month between releases. I love you trails of breadcrumbs I love you cliffhangers and mysteries and suspense. I love you looking forward to installments I love you regular release schedules I love you having a story become part of your routine. I love you serialized media.
#this post brought to you by the premier of the magnus protocol#I'm SO excited to have Magnus Thursdays as a part of my life once again#this is gonna do me so much good#but it's also about monthly vnc :)#until the mag comeback that was the only active serialized story I kept up with release to release#and now I have two things :)#a weekly regular and a monthly treat. as it should be#I'm flaky enough that I can't commit to keeping up with too many things with every update#but one weekly podcast and one monthly manga is just right :)#I love having piece of a story to look forward to on a regular basis!!#serialized storytelling is just. >>>>#invasion of the frogs
24 notes
·
View notes
Text
As someone who read the books and is only barely into the tv fandom, scrolling through and seeing people's reactions to the AMC Interview With The Vampire is wildly entertaining
#iwtv#'ipad baby armand' i mean yeah#in the books iirc (from a decade ago lol) he was an actual child like claudia style#'cherubic' i believe is how he was first described#'we dont know daniels a vampire until we see his eyes' speak for urself i saw those stickon nails#which. i think yall would really benefit from knowing lestats self-description in The Vampire Lestat (assumedly the basis of s3)#is basically the og Raven Dementia Way#i would not be surprised if that was the inspiration tbh#also claudia was much more bloodthirsty in the book#she had toddler-level tantrums but with superpowers#so did armand bc again he was Young#double checked and he was a teenager#also he HATED claudia#so obvi the tv show is different but honestly i dont mind that much#its a love story to the original while being markedly different#one thing they did get right is lestats cuntiness
8 notes
·
View notes
Text
Sonine Prime ... Part 2
Hi, everyone and welcome back to Sonine Prime! The part of the show when I come out and talk about Sonine (and a bit of Sontails) in Sonic Prime!
I unfortunately had to end part 1 a bit prematurely due to tumblr's video limit, so we didn't get very far into it. Right now we're about halfway into Sonic Prime Season 1 Episode 1, and (as promised) we're going to start part 2 tackling the scene that begins with Sonic and Nine's first meeting, and ends with them recounting Tails' and Nine's backstories.
So, without further ado, let's begin
ㅤ
<< Part 1 | Part 3 >>
(Essay/thoughts/analysis under the cut)
ㅤ
As I said in part 1, there is a lot going on here, and a lot to tackle.
We'll start with Sonic's side.
Now, it's important to mention that at this time, Sonic just believes Nine to be Tails who lost his memories/doesn't remember him. So most of this scene is Sonic calling Nine "Tails" and trying to appeal to him by talking about old times. While this will initially tell us more about how he feels about Tails than it does Nine (once again interesting that Tails specifically gets this focus as the best bud, a focus on "making things okay again" that is only later matched by Sonic's treatment of Thorn when he also believes that Amy is deep down inside her, because he initially believes them both to be a friend who has just forgot Sonic and themselves. Tails and Amy parallels in relation to Sonic: IIII), this is the basis upon which Sonic will build his relationship with Nine on, even though he will later consider Nine as a separate different person in relation to Tails.
Now, this scene is meant to call back to the flashback scene from earlier. Sonic punches in the code to Tails' lab and hopes it still works ("Tails you crafty fox"???🧐), and just as with Tails in the flashback, Sonic turns Nine's chair to make him face him.
"Tails, it's me!"
From Sonic's pov here, he can’t understand why Nine is fighting him or really what's happening. "Tails" was the nickname that Tails' bullies used when they were picking on him, but after meeting Sonic he was able to reclaim that nickname for himself. So to Sonic, he can’t understand why saying this name continues to make Nine angry and insist that his name is something else, just as he's put off that "Tails" would attack him and act like he doesn't know him.
He also spends a good chuck of the fight looking very hurt
"Tails, stop! We're buds, amigos...best friends!"
...
"Snap out of it, we go way back!"
...
"All my best memories of Green Hill have you in 'em. And you're not punching me!"
...
"Don't you wanna go home? Blue skies? Sunny beaches? Palm trees?"
And after spending most of the fight defending himself and dodging in favor of trying to appeal to who he thinks is Tails, trying to summon up memories of them being best friends, Sonic throws himself into the path of the other train to save Nine from getting hit.
"I've been trying to tell you that we are friends."
"Fabricated stories won't keep me from beating you back, intruder."
"Stop, just. Stop... We're friends—best friends. This has to ring a bell?"
Sonic just can't wrap his head around it—a world in which his best friend doesn't remember him, calls their times together "fabricated stories", fights him no matter how he tries to explain that they’re friends. None of this makes sense to him, and so he tries to explain how they met, because surely then "Tails" will remember him, right?
"From the moment we first met..." (interesting choice of words, considering what often follows this is the impression the character saying it got from the other or how they have always felt about the other)
But "Tails" only expresses surprise in how much Sonic knows, despite the fact that Nine has never met him before now, and explains a different, much darker version of Tails' backstory
One that doesn't include Sonic.
And again Sonic is having his hard time wrapping his head around this. That "Tails" is here, and yet doesn't "remember" him. That this "Tails" seems to have a similar backstory, but never met him. "Tails...but not. Here, but...gone?"
But he doesn't get too long to examine this before Nine asks "So, what else did we do?"
And this pretty much immediately perks Sonic up after he gets a look at Nine's face, like he really is curious what he could be missing.
And then of course that face comes back
And...it makes Sonic so visually happy and excited to talk about the Tornado, mention how they've gone on so many adventures and busted Eggman so many times...
"Look. We've had our share of ups and downs, but when we stick together? We never lose. And when all's said and done, there's no better reward than sharing a chili dog with your best pal. And that's just the tip of the iceberg! We've got a lifetime of adventures and memories together."
Even though Sonic doesn't yet consider Nine his own person, this entire scene is incredibly telling as to who Tails is to him (best friend, partner, amigo, forever companion), and sets up a basis for his relationship to Nine.
ㅤ
Now for Nine's side. For him, the bulk of the fight is him being aggressive and reacting due to his trauma. "Tails" was the name he was called as he was bullied and assaulted for years, and a name he came to associate with said traumatic experiences. The name he claimed for himself, symbolic of how he saved himself with his own power, is "Nine". Thus, when this strange hedgehog intrudes in his lab, interrupts his work, and calls him "Tails", boy does that set him off.
"Who sent you?!"
He's afraid and angry. Who else could this stranger be but one of those bullies or someone else to just call him a freak, intruding in his space.
And then the strange hedgehog calls them best friends? Continues to call him "Tails" despite Nine's clear aversion, and yet is trying to appeal to him emotionally?
But then the hedgehog puts himself in danger to save him. And that's really strange.
Because no one has friends here, right? Why would anyone save him? No one cares about anyone else, no one would just save someone at the expense of their own life, this hedgehog acts like he knows him and yet doesn't seem to know anything about him.
"Fabricated stories won't keep me from beating you back, intruder."
That's what it has to be, right? Maybe it's connected to why the hedgehog broke into his base. He saved him only because he needed him, right?
But the hedgehog makes it clear he never wanted a fight, the two rest on safe ground in the scareport. And then he tells another story to appeal to him.
The story of a two tailed fox who was picked on for being different, who was saved by Sonic, the very hedgehog before him.
And although that story is not quite right, the resemblance surprises Nine, catching his interest. Even if his past didn't happen that way, how could Sonic get those details (him being himself, getting picked on by jerks for having an extra Tail) right without Nine having never met him before? The way Nine reacts even implies his story is highly personal, and one he'd never told anyone.
And perhaps he feels a bit jealous, then.
Because this "Tails" that Sonic keeps talking about? He had someone there for him, someone who protected him when he was being bullied and picked on. But Nine? He took a beating for years. No one showed up to protect him, much less save him. He learned that he was alone, learned that these selfless people who would protect the weak don't exist, and so he finally saved himself.
Is that the kind of person Sonic is—the kind of person who would save a victim who's hurting, someone he'd never met, even if it doesn't benefit him? Just like how Sonic had saved him from being hit by that train?
"You weren't there"
And so what if Nine lets himself pretend for a moment that what Sonic is saying is true? What does it feel like to be Sonic's best friend, that person he'd stuck his neck out for and saved back then, someone who goes on adventures and kicks butt with him, who shares a meal with him, someone with whom they're both happy?
The way he begins to smile as Sonic talks about his times with Tails.
"But when we stick together, we never lose"
The way he frowns (touch adverse as he is) when Sonic puts a hand on his shoulder, but relaxes into it and gives this stranger a smile, and the way he perks up with the cutest, even bigger smile when Sonic pokes his heart.
"And when all's said and done? There's no better reward than sharing a chili dog with your best pal"
And then...Nine frowns again when Sonic says "best pal".
Because no matter how great that idea of home sounds, to Nine, none of that happened. None of this is really about him, no matter what Sonic says.
But, this is the beginning of the end for Nine. In just five in show minutes, he goes from trying to get answers out of Sonic, killing him, beating him back, to becoming interested in his "fabricated stories" and willing to help him with his little problem. He invites him into his lab this time and helps distribute the energy coming from him evenly on his body, even though he complains: "The only thing I hate more than people in my space is whiners."
Or the entire next scene. Sonic calls him amazing for his creation of the extra metal tails (which doesn't end up hitting Nine as intented), corrects himself after calling Nine "Tails" on accident, and then Sonic just speeds off, only for Nine to say "No– Wait, you dope! It's not safe!" and run after him.
While this is during an early period of the show where you can easily argue that Nine only cares about what he could use Sonic for and his current interest in the energy he exhibits, it still says a lot that he actually begins to show care in another person's wellbeing. And it also tells us a lot about Sonic that he'd transitioned from calling him "Tails" to "Nine" so quickly, even if he has to correct himself.
ㅤ
Now, as we move on to Nine and Sonic's capture by the Chaos Council, this brief scene of them outside before their capture also shows us once more just how quickly Sonic is jumping to "normalcy", starting with getting "Tails" back as his adventuring buddy. Although he wasn't incredibly concerned before, he brushes off Nine's concerns about the Chaos Council, instead acting like everything will be fine ("Wanna run up the walls?"). And we can see that Sonic still believes Nine is just Tails, absent his memories of Sonic and their friends.
"When you get your memory back, you'll remember that 'low profile' isn't my thing"
Nine: I told you to keep a low profile!
Sonic: No you didn't.
Nine: Yes I did.
Sonic: You didn't.
Nine: Yes I did.
Sonic: Nooo, you didn't.
Nine: Are you sure we were "best friends".
Ahjsjsj well. Nine says that, but he'll come to realize that he likes Sonic even when he finds him frustrating or annoying (just like Tails and, frankly, his other friends do😂). He already has been helping Sonic out and allowing him to be in his space, even if he doesn't understand Sonic.
ㅤ
And as I have hit the tumblr post picture limit, that's it for part 2! For part 3, we'll be beginning with Sonic and Nine's confinement in The Chaos Council's base, and perhaps I'll finally get to move on to Episode 2😂
#i just be ramblin#essay time#sonic the hedgehog#sonic prime#nine sonic prime#miles nine prower#nine the fox#sonine#sontails#see you all in part 3!#Sonine prime#Again sorry it's taking so much time to move between episodes but I'll tell ya. All of their interactions are just baked with so many#subtleties and expressions and there's just so much to say! Even from their first meeting their interactions are an exellent meal#And not to mention just how fast Nine is going to keep taking to Sonic‚ even though he's the one who has no basis to work off of and has to#get to know sonic from scratch#It's like one of those 'character meets an alternate universe version and has to learn to get to know this person who isn't quite the same#as the one they know‚ while the other (armed with stories about how that other person knows them) has to get to know and love a stranger wh#seems to be attached to a version of them that's *not* them'#sorta love stories. I love when there are actual conflictions and work that has to be done‚ so Person A can't just take Person B as a#replacement for the beloved they lost
25 notes
·
View notes
Text
Full Tech Day One pic today from kiko laureano (denizen of skid row / ensemble) & video (that's four seconds of "ya never know" playing over the static image) from & ft. marcia milgrom dodge (director / choreographer) double captioning "there might be puppets in this musical ;)" & "Well Shake my hand! Come see LITTLE SHOP OF HORRORS @guthrietheater featuring @actually_will_roland's hand!"
#buzz lightyear screenshot i don't believe that's a puppet Or will roland's hand#lsoh#frog & toad shirt yay :) that i believe is saying ''frog & toad are gay'' yahoooo#in unfamiliarity with lsoh: had to look up that snippet of song. i do enjoy the full Songs i should straightup....pick an album of them?#which; relevantly to this being a show with Versions. also like i've only seen the movie once a minute ago....#i know the movie Differed like the musical going well audrey dies then so also does seymour :( does one tragicomically lose a hand first#classic Hey My Hand :( maneuver :( still i reflect on the change like i don't want them to die.... :(#it's Enriching though to reflect on. like a fun balance of ''is there shortcomings of Metaphors? maybe but it's backed up by Story''#then are there shortcomings of story? maybe but it's backed up by how that'll play into a strength of metaphor. makes it Overall Enjoyable#and that i'm not an expert like plenty to muse on re: what are the Metaphors. and then how are they executed. what do i think#and i'm enrichingly not quite settled on Should They Get To Survive; Metaphorically? like i think it's fine either way#i mean we also Have it both ways lol. i think? i don't know about past or present variations versions iterations re: Onstage Medium#it's like it's supposed to be tragic too right right cautionarily so. yet. i indeed go :( about it. i think it's fine it's fine....#or do i. as you can see lmao a fun In Progress mental journey....like pointing to Doomed Tragic Couple iphegenia crash land falls#i would Not change it i would not Want it changed. not even for a what if; really. yet their basis is Knowing They're Kindredly Doomed.....#seymour and audrey are just america's little t4t couple who Do deserve to murder orin plant or no & More :(#much to consider. and always little Invocations to spice things up like & this plant won't stop trying to fuck them i guess#nodding thoughtfully as we are also amidst aesthetics that invoke larger contexts re: race; class; maybe even. gender. and more????#love a lot going on. love that it's really not trying to Be extremely settled in some Conclusive manner in any version. tends to be a win#and love that SPIT TAKE rick moranis walking on into the closing performance of be more chill on broadway???????#enjoy that one post of [god's mistake of making me so incredibly attracted to rick moranis] '80s gum stickers. ricky m#guy who's never seen kapow-i gogo seeing another show with a prop hand: wow this is just like kapow-i gogo
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
I didn’t even know fanfic was a thing until I was 30, but if I had, you can bet baby me would have been writing her heart out.
#about me#fanfic#it probably would have been weird straight cowboy fic based on John Wayne movies#cuz that was the only media I was able to watch on a regular basis#but god I wanna read that horrible fic I would have written#I would have had so much fun!#I basically just wrote fic in my head tho#cuz I had an ongoing story I’d play out where my name was JD Cahill#which was John Wayne’s character in one of the movies except the JD stood for Josephine Deneah cuz it was girl me#and she was 18 but she took over the family ranch#and everyone respected and feared her#and she would sling her guns and scare of the men who tried to take the ranch from her#and boss the cowboys around#and of course all the men fell in love with her because she was tough and beautiful#good times#basically I wrote self insert fic in my head
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
living in my barbie dream house of physically affectionate dirge
#it’s most certainly not happening now#but later. in the future#for now they are too scared to act on the impulse#partially on the basis of like. would they hurt a friend in process of trying to be kind#on another note I’m obsessed w lae’zel like#yes girl continue to feel as if you can only find your purpose in life in a godlike being who only pretends to care about you!#I don’t think it’s a flaw there is so much of her sense of self and world view within her culture#it takes all the sense in the world for her to cling to that so intensely#it makes sense not takes sense#it’s so interesting next to dirge who has such a half baked sense of self#from what scattered memories + invented bits and bobs + the experiences on the road#side note: I love the succeeding at various checks like history ones where it talks about your studies#it’s the how did I know that kind of feeling#but dirge has gotten used to it and is sort of….piecing together bits of who they are by that#they can kinda piece together that they were taught history magic and medicine as well as bard magicks#beyond that they got nothing. but they sure will spin a story of who they are based on that#bc what is a bard if not a good storyteller? even in the service of self illusion#sorry im getting bg3 obssessed ANYWAY#oc: durge#owen plays bg3
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
fandom music as a whole peaked at 'lullaby for a princess' sorry everyone /j
#literally like... what a fucking song. i love it so much its unreal#my post#mlp#theres so many good fandom songs and i listen to so many on a regular basis. but my bias for this song omg#THE VOCALS. THE LYRICS. THE VISUALS. THE RELATION TO THE CANON STORY.#THAT MOMENT WHERE CELESTIA REALIZES WHAT SHE DID AND SHE JUST STARTS FUCKING SOBBING#HELPPPPP
5 notes
·
View notes
Note
Im jus looking at u w big eyes. Tell me what you're autistic about. Infodump get out of jail free card. Any size
oh boy there are. many things. there are so so so many things……. all rattling around my little brain……………….
#obviously art i love u art i love u drawing i LOVE u character design. love love love#i love u videogames hollow knight is my biggest special interest ever it’s literally the best fucking game i’ve ever played i would kill for#it. i would replay it 393748 times it changed my life for the better i think#i just spent like 2 minutes trying to say anything comprehensible about this game but i just. i dont know#i marathon all of mossbag’s videos on a bi-monthly basis if that helps.#extremely autistic about fnaf i have a love-hate relationship with it. it’s literally my life and part of my brain i grew up with it#im never Not thinking about it. but also i can shit all over it sooo bad i can be such a hater of it#ace attorney…. my autidm game. i could never get tired of the characters or the story no matter how much i play#disco elysium <3 i have no words for disco elysium it’s just the best game ever i think. life changing#has kim kitsuragi in there#i love u tv shows i love u gravity falls literally up there with fnaf on the ‘part of my actual life’ shelf#i’ve rewatched it so many times but it never stops being good and the characters never stop being interesting to dissect#i love u steven universe and my love-hate kismesis relationship with it. show that was so perfect but so flawed. but perfect i think#i could go on and on about su im so serious. but i will hold myself back for the greater good#i love u the owl house <3 it is doing everything it can and it is doing so good#i never really got a chance to participate in active analysis and theorizing so that was a good experience for me#got me autistically looking over one single frame to figure out a plot mystery#oughhhhhh i love u anime. chansow man. one pinch man. mop sikey. saiki k. bnha is in there too somewhere#i’m too autistic over bnha sorry i know it’s bad but maybe i just like it when shows are bad and i get to fix them in my head#i get to make everyone my ocs#which by the way im obsessed with my ocs. completely#you guys think im crazy about my fancharacters wait till you see me infodumping about my actual ocs then i might actually explode#ok this is not as long as i wanted to be but i just cant thhink of words when i try to explain how much my interests mean to me#u just have to trust me ok. or wait for a reason for me to go completely ballistic and write like 13k words explaining why hk is the game of#all time. ok (falls over)#cramswering
20 notes
·
View notes
Text
I had such a specific and strange upbringing in many ways and there are so many ways in which joining my partner's family has really brought that home. Again and again.
My partner and I have so many things we have to explain to each other, like we're from different cultures almost even though we're essentially not. And it's normal for different families to have different traditions. But I'm always aware of the fact that her family's traditions and foodways and social expectations and history are essentially normal in a way my family's never was or will be.
They have their little family-specific things of course but overall, they have a shared history and culture with lots of interconnected families. They can so easily find people of a similar background that they expect many of their traditions and expectations and history to be not just instantly understood but frequently shared even among the people they meet as strangers—and they often are.
But there's so much that my siblings who came up with me are the only people in the world can really understand.
When I ask my partner about something her family does, it's often essentially a question about how things are normally done for people of their background. When she asks about mine, I'm often finding myself grasping for words to explain arcane knowledge so specific that half a dozen people at most can fully understand it.
I know it's not that deep and we have much more in common than not. But my isolated and weird upbringing haunts me. I'm not only an outsider for being autistic and disabled, two traits her family readily accepts and are supportive of. I'm also constantly playing catch-up with what's normal. I don't even know what I'm expected to already know by default. It makes me feel alien.
And then I call one of my siblings and they know without any explanation a hundred things I don't even know how to articulate to my partner. It makes me feel very far from home, even though our family was never really integrated into the place where we grew up either. We were strangers there too.
#it's not about feeling unaccepted to be clear#her family are so amazing and have welcomed me so enthusiastically and i love them and feel loved by them#there's just this chasm of experience I don't know how to bridge#from things my aunt has told me I think she and my mother and their siblings were the same way#raised apart from the local customs in part due to eccentricity and largely due to abuse and neglect#there are good things about my history but I don't always know how to explain it all#my partner often says my stories about growing up sound like a basis for a literary fiction story#there's just so much that's strange and hard to explain#updates on my boring life
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
Vent post in the tags don't mind me
#I've been having a chronic pain flare up this week#I fell off tracking my migraines in March after getting meds which helped so I have no basis of comparison and everything sucks.#i think it's stress trigger because this week has sucked in general#i had panic attacks sunday and Monday about talking to my parents about wedding stuff#and then had to go on a work trip monday and Tuesday that was exhausting#so it's been a bad time but on top of that my body has decided to punish me with a normal people level 8-9 flare up and I'm still at work#sigh#the fatigue and brain fog is so bad and i have so much to do#I would love to quit and go freelance and be self employed so I can take the bad days off to rest#but until my books take off i can't do that I gotta hustle#and god love my fiance he's working so hard too but he hates his job so i need to stay here because my work actually satisfying#when im not exhausted#i get to do fun things#but the FATIGUE#ugh#I just wanna write my little stories and sleep#etta rambles in the tags
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
i cant believe fontaine finally cleaned up its archon quest writing and learned to Actually Proper Balance its npc screentime with its playable character screentime. and yet. AND YET!!! THIS is the nation where i end up hyperfixating on the historical figures with no official designs.
#rambling#genshin#i am DANGEROUSLY close to speedrunning the “hyperfixated on a blorbo > loosely based in canon headcanons > 'thats just your oc'” pipeline#with the narzissenkreuz institute kids#im dying so much to see what happens next that im just making up shit in my mind functionally 😭#if they wont give me more quest for like another month then i will do it myself 💥💥#but actually they should take their time with the quests. my impatience is my own fault and should not be the basis for a rushed story#anyways. i cant believe they finally got solid playable character writing in the archon quests#and instead of hyperfixating on lyney who checks like. almost EVERY blorbo preference box of mine.#im obsessed with an oceanid world quest 😭 and some random journals#something something tragedy something something#i think i just really loved the intrigue and mystery of it all. slowly finding all the notebooks and piecing together#who did what and wtf went down#was SO satisfying. it was so cool to figure out#i was live reacting to the oceanid quest in a discord channel with some friends and you could literally SEE my thought process go from#“this quest boring as shit idc about oceanid roleplay” to “oh wait they're actually commenting on the nostalgia themes now” to#“HEY WAIT A FUCKING MINUTE THE NAMES CONNECT?!?!”#especially since when i started doing all that the wiki didn't have character pages for most of the narzissenkreus institute kids#beyond like one to two sentences#and so the moment i saw that rene's page was like an actual paragraph and mentioned the kvarnah quest i was like HOLY FUCK#anyways!!!! genshin's writing has been surprisingly good recently#but still. i cant believe they finally managed to get me attached to a random npc! a random HISTORICAL npc for that matter!!!!#inazuma and sumeru wishes they had that#i think another part of it is that fontaine has been good about giving its historical figures consistent personality and character voices#and also character drama! like there's a LOT to latch onto here especially since they're letting you see it firsthand instead of only notes#and since they've tied it back to the present in a couple of very obvious ways it makes the connections easier to latch onto#and also since there's less people to worry about#i still don't understand inazuma history tbh. there were too many damn people and they all blended together in my mind...#they all had like overlapping jobs too ueghhjk#“this guy was a master of [weapon] and died in the catacylsm” describes like at least 3 people who are only ever mentioned in artifact sets
16 notes
·
View notes
Text
I haven't talked to a friend in a few months but I want to, so I just texted a picture of my dog in hopes that that will start a conversation. Cuz I miss her but don't know how to start conversations.
#i made this friend during one of the worst weeks of my life#it was a terrible training week for summer camp#i was surrounded by strangers and closeted and didnt know anything#long story#but then i saw her! a trans woman! and immediately needed to be friends#and we immediately hit it off#she's cool as fuck and i love her so much#no i dont know her last name or where she lives. why is that relevant. i still love her#i am reallybad at remembering people exist if i dont see them on a regular basis#sometimes i forget my best friend of six years exists if we havent talked in a few days#so the fact that i remembered her and got up the energy to text her means a lot#i am so tired#my puppy is sick to his tummy. and he wakes me up ever hour or two to make it my problem#and i have an ear infection that's causing immense immeasurable pain. so its hard to fall asleep through that#thats not really relevant but i thought id bring it up anyway#i ate a really good lemon bar today#i hope you all have a wonderful day and eat a delicious baked good of your choice
4 notes
·
View notes