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cybernaght · 2 years ago

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The fandom echo chamber: fanon, microanalysis and conspiracy brain

As someone who has been in fandom spaces, on and off, for 20 years, I find some fascinating trends popping up in the last decade that I thought to be fandom-specific but clearly aren’t. So, I would like to do a little examination of where those things come from, how they are engaged with, and what it says about the way we consume media. This is a think piece, of sorts, with my brain being the main source. As such, we will spend some time down the memory lane of a fandom-focused millennial.

This is largely brought about by Good Omens. But it’s also not really about Good Omens at all.

Part one. Fanon.

The way we see characters in any story is always skewed by our very selves. This is a neutral statement, and it does not have a value judgement. It’s simply unavoidable. We recognise aspects of them, love aspects of them, and choose aspects of them to highlight based entirely on our own vision of the universe.

Recognition comes into this. There is a reason so many protagonists of romance novels have a “blank slate” problem. Even when they do not, we love characters who are like us or versions of us that we would like to be. And when we say “we”, I also mean, “me”.

(I remember very clearly this realisation hit me after a whole season of Doctor Who with writing which I hated utterly when I questioned why I still clung so incredibly hard to Clara Oswald as my favourite companion. Then I looked at myself in the mirror. Oh. Well. That would do it, wouldn’t it?)

Then, there is projection, and, again, this is a neutral statement. Projection exists, and it is completely normal and, dare I say it, valid way of engaging with — well, anything. Is the character queer? Trans? Neurodivergent? Are they in love? Do they like chocolate? Are they a cat person? Well, yes, if this is what the text says, but if the text does not say anything… You tell me. Please, do tell me. Because, in that moment of projection, they are yours.

And then, there is fandom osmosis, and that is the most fascinating one of them all, the one that is not very easy to note while you are inside the echo chamber. It’s the way we collectively, consciously or not, make decisions on who or what the characters are, what their relationships are, and what happens to them.

(Back when I was writing egregiously long Guardian recaps on this blog I actually asked if Shen Wei’s power being learning actually was stated anywhere in the canon of the show. Because I had no idea. I have read and reread dozen of fanfics where that is the case, and at some point through enough repetition, it became reality.)

We are all kind of making our own reality here, aren’t we?

Back when things were happening in a much less centralised manner - in closed livejournal groups, and forums of all shapes and sizes - I don’t remember there being quite as much universally agreed upon fanon. Frankly, I don’t remember much of universally agreed upon anything. But now, everything is in one place: we have this, and we have AO3, and it’s wonderful, it really is so much easier to navigate, but it’s also one gigantic reality-shifting echo chamber, with blogs, reblogs, trends, and rituals.

Accessibility plays its part, too. If you were, say, in Life on Mars (UK) fandom between seasons, and you wanted to post your speculation fic, you had to have had an account, and then find and gain access to one of the bigger groups (lifein1973 was my poison, but ymmv), and then, if you feel brave you may post it, but also, you may want to do so from your alt account if you wanted to keep yours separate, and then you would have to go through the whole process again. And I’m not saying that fan creations then were somehow inherently better for it than fan creations now (although Life on Mars Hiatus Era is perhaps a bad example - because some of the Speculation Fic there was breathtaking), but there is something to say about the ease of access that made the fandoms go through a big bang of sorts.

(I mean, come on, I can just come here and post this - and I am certain people will read it, and this blog is a pandemic cope baby about Chinese television for goodness sake.)

The canon transformations that happen in the fandom echo chamber truly are fascinating to witness as someone who is more or less a fandom butterfly. I get into something, float around for a bit, then get into something else and move on. I might come back eventually when the need arises, but I don’t sustain a hiatus mind-state. This means that when I float away and return, I find some very intriguing stuff.

Let’s actually look at Good Omens here. Season two aired, and I found it spectacular in its cosy and anguished way; deliberately and intelligently fanfic-y in its plot building; simple but subversive, and so very tender. (I will have to circle back to this eventually, because, truly, I love how deliberately it takes the tropes and shatters them - it’s glorious). And, to me - a person who read the book, watched the first season, hung around AO3 for a few weeks and moved on - absolutely on-point in terms of characterisation.

So imagine my surprise when the fandom disagreed so vehemently that there are actual multi-tiered theories on how characters were not in possession of their senses. Nothing there, in my mind, ever contradicted any of the stated text, as it stood. This remained a strange little mystery until I did what I always do when I flutter close to an ongoing fandom.

I loaded AO3 and sorted the existing fic by popularity. And there it was, all there: the actual earth-shattering mutual devotion of the angel and the demon; willingness to Fall; openness and long heart-aching confession speeches. There was all of the fanon surrounding Aziraphale and Crowley, which, to me, read as out of character, and to one for whom they became the reality over the last four years, read as truth.

Again, only neutral statements here. This is not a bad thing, and neither this is a good thing, this is just something that happens, after a while, especially when there are years for the fandom-born ideas to bounce around and stew. I can’t help but think that so much of what we see as real in spaces such as this one is a chimaera of the actual source and all the collective fan additions which had time and space to grow, change, develop, and inspire, reverberating over and over again, until the echoes fill the entirety of the space.

Eventually, this chimaera becomes a reality.

Part two. Microanalysis

Here are my two suppositions on the matter:

1. Some writers really love breadcrumb storytelling.

Russel T Davies, for instance, on his run of Doctor Who (and, if you are reading it much later - I do mean the original one), loved that technique for his seasonal arcs. What is a Bad Wolf? Who is Harold Saxon? Well, you can watch very very carefully, make a theory, and see it proven right or wrong by the end of the season.

Naturally, mystery box writers are all about breadcrumb storytelling: your Losts and your Westworlds are all about giving you snippets to get your brain firing, almost challenging you to figure things out just ahead of the reveal.

2. We, as humans, love breadcrumbs.

And why wouldn’t we? Breadcrumbs are delicious. They are, however, a seasoning, or a coating. They are not the meal.

Too much metaphor?

Let’s unpack it and start from the beginning.

Pattern recognition colours every aspect of our lives, and it colours the way we view art to a great extent. I think we truly underestimate how much it’s influenced by our lived experiences.

If you are, broadly speaking, living somewhere in Western/North-Western Europe in the 14th century, and you see a painting in which there is a very very large figure surrounded by some smaller figures and holding really tiny figures, you may know absolutely nothing about who those figures are, but you know that the big figure is the Important One, and the small ones are Less Important Ones, and the tiny ones are In Their Care. You know where your reverence would lie, looking at this picture. And, I imagine, as someone living in the 14th century, you may be inspired to a sense of awe looking at this composition, because in the world you live in, this is how art works.

If you, on the other hand, watch a piece of recorded media and see the eyes of two characters meet as the violins swell, you know what you are being told at that moment. You don’t have to have a film degree to feel a sort of way when you see a green-tinged pallet used, when cross-cuts use juxtaposing images, or notice where your focus is pulled in any given shot. This stuff - this recognition of patterns - has been trained into us by the simple fact that we live in this time, on this planet, and we have been doing so long enough to have engaged recorded media for a period of time.

As humans, we notice things. Our brains flare up when they see something they recognise, and then we seek to find other similar details and form a bigger picture. This often happens unconsciously, but sometimes it does not. Sometimes we do it on purpose: finding breadcrumbs in stories is a little bit like solving a mystery. It allows us to stretch that brain muscle that puts two and two together. It makes us feel clever.

So yes, we love breadcrumbs, and, frankly, quite a lot of storytelling takes advantage of this. It’s very useful for foreshadowing, creating thematic coherence, or introducing narrative parallels and complexity. It’s useful for nudging the viewer into one or the other emotional direction, or to cue them into what will happen in the next moment, or what exactly is the one important detail they should pay attention to.

Because this is something media does intentionally, and something we pick up both consciously and not, it is very hard to know when to stop. We don't really ever know when all of the breadcrumbs have been collected. It becomes very easy to get carried away. There is a very specific kind of pleasure in digging into content frame by frame, soundbite by soundbite, chasing that pleasure of finding.

But it is almost never breadcrumbs all the way down. They are techniques to help us focus on the main event: the story. I truly believe those who make media want it to reach the widest possible audience, and that includes all of us who like to watch every single thing ever created with our Media Analysis Goggles on and those who are just here to enjoy the twists and turns of the story at the pace offered to them. And I think, sometimes in our chase to collect and understand every little clue we forget that media is not made to just cater for us.

One can call it missing a forest for the trees. But I would hate to mix my metaphors, so let’s call it missing a schnitzel for the breadcrumbs.

Part three. The Conspiracy Brain.

If you are there with me, in the midst of the excited frenzy, chasing after all those delicious breadcrumbs, then patterns can grow, merge together, and become all-encompassing theories. Let’s call them conspiracy theories, even though this is not what they truly are.

So, why do we believe in conspiracy theories?

One, Because We Have Been Lied To.

All conspiracies start with distrust.

If you are in fandom spaces - especially if you are in fandom spaces which revolve around a queer fictional couple - especially-especially if you have been in such spaces for a period of time, you have most certainly been lied to at one point or another.

We don’t even have to talk about Sherlock - and let’s not do that - but do you remember Merlin? Because I remember Merlin. Specifically, I remember the publicity surrounding the first season, with its weaponised usage of “bromance” and assertions that this whole thing is a love story of sorts, and then the daunting realisation that this was all a stunt, deliberately orchestrated to gather viewership.

And, because we were lied to in such a deliberate manner for such an extensive period of time, I genuinely believe that it forever altered our pattern recognition habits, because what was this if not encouragement to read into things? Now we are trained to read between the lines or see little cries for help where they might not be. Because we were told, over and over again, that we should.

(Yes, I think we are all existing in these spaces coloured by the trauma of queer-bating. I am, however, looking forward to a world where I can unlearn all of that.)

Two, Cognitive Dissonance.

The chain reaction works a bit like this: the world is wrong - it can’t possibly be wrong by coincidence - this must be on purpose - someone is responsible for it.

Being Lied To is a preamble, but cognitive dissonance is where it all originates. In so many cross-fandom theories I have noticed a four-step process:

A) this is not good

B) this author could not have made a mistake

C) this must be done on purpose

D) here is why

(Funny thing is, I have been on the receiving end of the small conspiracy spiral, and it is a very interesting experience. Not relevant to this conversation is the fact that a lot of my job revolves around storytelling. What is relevant is that my hobbies also revolve around storytelling. And one of them is DnD. Now, imagine my genuine shock when one of the players I am currently writing a campaign for noticed a small detail that did not make a logical sense within the complexity of the world, and latched on to it as something clearly indicating some kind of a secret subplot. Their thinking process also went a bit like this: this detail is not a good piece of writing — this DM knows how to tell stories well — this is obviously there on purpose. It was not there on purpose. I created a clumsy shorthand. I erred, in that pesky manner humans tend to. And, seeing this entire thought process recited to me directly in the moment, I felt somewhere between flattered and mortified.)

This whole line of thinking, I think, exists on a knife’s edge between veneration and brutal criticism, relentlessly dissecting everything “wrong”, with a reverent “but this is deliberate” attached to it like a vice, because it is preferable to a simple conclusion that the author let you down, in one way or another.

Three, Intentionality

I believe that there is no right or wrong way of engaging with stories, regardless of their medium, and assuming no one gets hurt in the process. While in a strictly academic way, there is a “correct” way of reading (and reading into) media, we here are largely not academics but consumers; consumption is subjective.

However, this all changes when intentionality is ascribed.

The one I find particularly fascinating is the intentionality of “making it bad on purpose” because, as open-minded as I intend to always be, this just does not happen.

It certainly does not happen in long-form media. Even in the bread-crumb mystery box-type long-form media.

When television programs underdeliver, they also underperform, and then they get cancelled.

If all the elements of Westworld Season 4 that did not sit together in a completely satisfactory way were written deliberately as some sort of deconstruction for the final season to explore, then it failed because that final season will now never come.

(There will likely never be a Secret Fourth Episode.)

And look, I am not here to refute your theories. Creativity is fun, and theorising is fantastic.

But, perhaps, when the line of thought ventures into the “bad on purpose” territory, it could be recognised for what it is: disappointment and optimism, attempting to coexist in a single space. And I relate to that, I do, and I am sorry that there is even a need for this line of thinking. It’s always so incredibly disappointing that a creator you believed to be devoid of flaws makes something that does not hit in the way you hoped it would. It’s pretty heartbreaking.

Unfortunately, people make mistakes. We are all fallible that way.

Four, Wildfire.

Then, when the crumbs are found, a theory is crafted, and intentionality is ascribed, all that needs to happen is for it to catch on. And hey, what better place for it than this massive hollow funnel that we exist in, where thoughts, ideas and interpretations reverberate so much they become inextricable from the source material in collective consciousness.

Conspiracy theories create alternate realities, very much like we all do here.

So where are we now?

I am not here to tell you what is right and what is wrong; what is true, and what is not. We are all entitled to engage with anything we wish, in whichever way we wish to do it. This is not it, at all.

All I am saying is… listen.

Do you hear that echo?

I do.

#fandom thoughts #fanon #good omens #good omens 2 #bbc sherlock #merlin bbc #think piece #it's been years and I still have no idea how to tag #conspiracy theories #fandom content #all fandoms

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pnfc · 5 months ago

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todays timefilling activity was trying to list all the ways perry's status as an animal has bearing on his circumstances/character. since a lot of these ideas crop up when im thinking about au or human versions of him

unique effects of perry being a platypus:

prefatory notes: -these aren’t all hard canon, they’re a blend of canon/speculation/my personal preference -some are inconsistent in the show, eg perry being banned from riding a bus but allowed at a casino / dubiously allowed to drive a car. these are potential challenges, not universal ones -some of these circumstances can be wielded strategically for perry's benefit (eg perry exploiting assumed mindlessness) so everything listed isn’t 100% negative -some of these can be superficially mapped onto a human version of perry (eg inability to speak), but they’ll have different nuances if he’s not an animal

note i’m not arguing that any one of these points is fundamental to perry’s character, although they do add up to a set of life circumstances with significant bearing on who perry is in the show. this isn’t a case for the eminent superiority of a canon compliant perry over any au version, which is a matter of personal preference. you could similarly list out all the human-specific qualities of an imagined human perry, and you could find that version of the character more or equally compelling -- but these are qualities unique to the canonical platypus perry. (and i do think all of them are fun to explore, on their own and in the context of him having a rship with doof)

note also there ARE canonical au versions of perry for whom these conditions don’t apply, due to him having a different rship with the flynn-fletchers or owca or doof, or him being a different species! e.g. agent p from ‘temple of juatchadoon’ doesn’t appear to have any relationship with the flynn-fletchers ; parable the dragonpus could have any number of physiological differences, like a massively extended lifespan ; the star wars version of perry likely doesn’t face the same kind of judgment/scrutiny over his species or over interspecies relationships

neutral or positive qualities related to perry’s species:

best most immutable aspect of perry being a platypus: he’s a platypus. ie a cute lovable little animal guy with all these cool platypus features like his swimminess and his electro-bill and his whappy tail and his soft warm fur <3

2nd best (debatable) aspect of perry being a platypus: doof thinks all of the above daily

being an animal means he can communicate with / ally with other animals when he wants to

being an animal who isn't a common pet can occasionally yield specialized treatment, e.g. he gets more respect than a cat or dog in some public spaces, he can 'pass' for a human more easily, and many people can't identify what he is

has a unique rship with the flynn-fletchers and especially phineas&ferb -- they named and raised him, are functionally his parents, even if he catches up to / outpaces them developmentally. he gets to experience a loving parental dynamic from them.

also has a unique rship with monogram and carl, who brought him up through the academy. (based on the owca book, and perry’s current dynamic with mono in particular, this was probably less than wholesome/loving treatment)

no standard human education: is educated/propagandized at owca, and is otherwise self-educated or learns through osmosis

has no known biological family

(i like to assume) born/raised in danville, so isn't actually australian

would face less/no prejudice specifically along the axis of him being trans or intersex, it’s more invisiblized for him (otoh him being in a gay rship, less invisiblized)

is an endangered species

physical limitations/difficulties due to perry’s species:

is unable to speak human language (specifically because he’s an animal; he can make platypus sounds -- his rship with muteness would change if he was human) and (as far as we see in the show) is untrained in asl, so his communicative abilities are restricted

produces dangerous venom that he has to be careful of

very short and tiny (which he CAN use to his advantage but can also disadvantage him in human society, or in general - him trying and failing utterly to pull lyla up the train, lol)

likely has limited understanding of his own anatomy/physiology

(realistically) more vulnerable to heat than a human, potential dietary restrictions, less professional medical support available, seasonal hormone fluctuations

societal judgment/restriction of perry based on his species:

forbidden from accessing some human spaces / doing certain human activities

assumed to be mindless or unintelligent, assumed to be non-autonomous and a pet. generally disrespected (even doof is not innocent of this)

can be treated as a child, due to his young age (tho he's a mature adult in platypus years)

perceived by some as less-than-a-person, worth less than a human

by extension, heinz or any human partner/friend faces judgment for prioritizing/being in a rship with him as an animal (even a platonic one)

ways perry’s role as an owca agent is fucked due to his species:

raised as a child soldier, groomed into his career/given no choice in it, and in his short time on earth has had no opportunity to question or escape from it (due to the host family placement which effectively blackmails perry 24/7)

unclear if he has a right to his own person (owned by owca? and/or superficially owned by the flynn-fletchers?) or a legal government presence (e.g. can he legally own assets? he gets an income, but as an animal does the government acknowledge him as the owner of whatever accounts? is he forced to assume a false human identity? is he a citizen? can he rent?)

raised outside of his species, so quitting and living in nature among his own is not an option for him, he is forced to live in a society not built for his species

estranged from his fellow agents on the basis of species, esp. since the majority of them exhibit more instinctive/untamed animal behaviors that perry finds frustrating/unrelatable

forced to hide his intelligence/personhood/capacity for love and complex relationships among his family (much more severe than just hiding a secret job)

also: they make him eat canned worms and use a litterbox, and we know perry finds this humiliating :(

he has limited autonomy around his family -- is subject to the whims of their travel plans, etc. is technically always performing his job, since he has to maintain cover at home. down-time where he can openly express himself is extremely limited.

not legally protected on the level of a human, so if he dies owca likely will face no consequences - they perform animal experiments on him

has limited (if any) job prospects outside of owca - and doesn't get human worker protections

problematic aspects to perry’s romantic prospects:

literally a minor. literally a 41 year agegap with heinz. obscene

more to the point: ppl assuming perry can’t be in a healthy/consensual rship because he’s an animal

has limited life experience and no romantic experience. heinz is his first romantic connection, and there’s a huge imbalance of experience there.

has severely limited and complicated romantic prospects outside of heinz due to his species (an issue heinz does not share)

(presumably) can’t legally marry heinz, and even if he did many people would not regard him as a serious romantic partner (or stepdad, etc)

his natural lifespan is about a third of a human’s, so he and heinz probably have disparate time left, by a matter of decades (additionally, perry will probably die before most people he knows)

how the heck do a human and a platypus have sex… i’m gonna have to think about this one (more to the point: there’s no established precedent for a romantic and/or physical rship between their species, they have to figure it out on their own. that includes negotiating any imbalance in their sex drives)

#meta #spinning my wheels in a public space. i prolly left out a lot of points

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youkaiyume · 11 months ago

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So I don't read the Bridgerton books, but what I know about them I have kind of learned through Osmosis from social media. So i'm going to go ahead and make a prediction that now with Show!Benedict being Bi or Pansexual that he will meet his love interest at the Masquerade ball but they will be disguising their gender. So when he meets them again from what I understand from the book storyline and does not recognize them it will add that extra layer of "of course this person that I am attracted to is not the same person that I was also wildly attracted to back at the masquerade ball."

Will check back with this prediction in 2 years lmao.

#bridgerton #benedict bridgerton #sophie beckett #text post #i don't even go here #book-wise

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copepods · 3 months ago

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ok arcane s1 act 1 misc thoughts (SPOILERS)

-i like that a lot of the rich characters (cait's family, some council members) have transatlantic accents. i didnt really notice at first but upon rewatch of ep 2 it was super apparent and i love it

-i never got super into vander's character bc by the end of ep 1 i was like Yeah this guy is super dead. the 2 other kids who died as well (never even learned their names lol). also there was a lot more vander + silco than i thought there would be? like they laid it all out at once. i kind of knew they knew each other in the past from fandom osmosis but i expected it to be more of a slow burn reveal i guess

-im interested to see what the show does with ekko specifically. i know he becomes more prominent later on AND has stuff going on with jinx/powder, which i was honestly expecting them to set up more? like have them be friends or like talk to each other once lol. anyway he was pretty minor thus far so im intrigued in what they're gonna do with him

-i know vi goes to prison after this, but the guard who chloroformed her seemed to be trying to save her??? so i have no idea what's happening actually

-i knew silco was gonna adopt powder but i was honestly expecting it to be more? calculated? on his part? like he finds out powder was the one who blew up the building, and is like ooooh new talent. hey kid. do you want to join my gang of evil drug warlocks. but nope he genuinely reached out to her in a moment of grief against his better judgement. kind of a baller move mr. lesbian i respect that

-also powders eyes turned purple for emotional reasons and not magic drug reasons? cool. didnt know peoplw could do that

-Heimerdinger War Flashback last episode was kind of really funny im sorry i cant take this guy seriously. but i also got distracted because there were horses in the flashback and for some reason that surprised me? it did not occur to me that horses exist in the arcane universe. they just don't fit the vibe. also this guy is transparently what if yoda were lorax

-also i wanna know how the fuck jayce and his mom and the wizard (viktor probably) got to piltover after all that in the flashback. did the wizard summon a honda civic to drive them home or what. also, what were they doing there??

-and jayce keeps saying "magic real. ive seen it" but refusing to elaborate??? if i got saved by a wizard who warped space and time then gave me a cool rock i would make it my personality. which i guess he kind of did but you'd think he'd be telling people about it more. maybe he thinks people won't believe him? silly jayce. magic tech isnt real. you escaped the siberian tundra through the power of science. athiests on christmas waiting for charles darwin to come down the chimney etc

-i cant tell if mel is just one councilmember and not like above all the others OR straight up the president or whatever? she clearly has influence but i cant tell if she's everyone elses boss or not. maybe they said something about that in dialogue and i missed it. also is piltover an oligarchy or do they inherit their council positions or what? somehow i don't feel like normal democracy is on the table here

-what is it exactly jayce (and viktor) were trying to do WITH the magic? this always bugs me in tv shows when they just say "im working on some Science Tech Inventions" and dont elaborate on what those inventions are. are the magic balls a source of infinite renewable energy??? please tell me what you're actually doing with the sparkly zero-g machine

-vander's dying words being "protect powder" and vi immediately doing the opposite of that is crazyyyyy sure hope that doesnt haunt her for the rest of her life lol

-was genuinely distracted by the cool ass crab logo on the abandoned building. that was sick as hell. i love crabs

#arcane liveblog #text

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frownyalfred · 4 months ago

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Hi, I saw someone mention bloodletting awhile ago and decied to give it ago myself despite knowing nothing about star wars. Got say I absolutely love the work you've put in for the translation feature I am slowly starting to learn through osmosis here.

That aside! The plot that is building up is interesting- there's conflict abound and I can't wait to see it resolve itself. That knife really feels like a chekoves gun right now. Also Talia and her response to Bruce's update about Damain is just- its so interesting to see. Not only that but the characterization you've put into all the batkids as well!

I am only starting chapter 15 at the time of sending this ask, however the fact kryptonians are hard wired for touch- records showing its down into their genetics and the jedi labeling it as a want is just- it feels needlessly cruel. No wonder Clark is having such issues with asking for that from Bruce.

Anyways, hopefully I'll be able to form something more coherent soon, but thank you so much for writing. Your fics never fail to impress

Thank you so much!!!!! It’s such a fun fic but a ton of work blending the two fandoms and canons. I feel so bad for Clark, who was adopted by the Jedi and told that wanting touch is wrong. No way! Not in a Mando society! They have no shame and give affection freely and that’s how it should be.

#thank you so much friend #anon #asks #bloodletting #bloodletting my beloved #batman #bruce wayne #dc #myfic #theresurrectionist #batfamily #clark kent #superman #superbat #Star Wars #Mandalorian AU

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fandomfluffandfuck · 6 months ago

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I don't have the energy to actually write much about Sebastian knowing proper choking techniques, so just a quick thought:

Ignoring an obvious kinky undertone that I strongly get the vibe from for Seb, I judt know he's been choked a time or two and has picked up techniques through bascially osmosis, lmao, what if Seb knows how to choke someone properly because of his role for Bucky? The winter soldier does it a shit ton. He had to have been trained for that. Stunts don't fuck around and choreography takes time to learn. Time that, Chris, we know, takes less of. He picks up stunts wildly fast, being shown beats back to back and parroting them perfectly. Seb, like a normal human, takes more time.

So, Sebastian probably worked a lot more with the stunt doubles and stunt performers before finally having Chris show up for a few practice runs before the final shot.

They practice a lot.

They test a few different camera angles, trying to figure out exactly how to solve this artistic problem. The tension pulls Chris' muscles into a tangled knot of anticipation. He could vibrate out of his fucking skin.

The intensity of that repeat repeat repeat, hand-around-your-neck problem solving is hell. Sisyphean if the boulder were pressing on your throat and you liked it. It's the closest Chris has been to Seb. Maybe. They've shot lots of scenes. Lots of stunts. None quite like this, though. Even when they were wrestling, all but fucking grinding, for Captain America: Winter Soldier, Chris at least knew how terribly torturous that would be, how much he would struggle through gritted teeth not to get hard. Here, now, he didn't expect this. It hits.

It's good.

It shouldn't be. But it is.

Chris has been fucking lusting after Seb hard since that first film--who could stare up at Sebastian (standing on an apple box to give the illusion hieght difference for skinny Steve) and not fall madly in love lust with such a pretty man--and needing to have his fist, cold and hard yet so gentle and caring every time they call cut, wrapped around his throat for his fuckin' job only makes it worse.

It was worse already when Seb showed up to set jacked outta fucking control, looking thick as fuck, prowling around, heavy and taking up space but still being so fucking sweet.

It's worse than worse the next morning when Chris rolls over in bed, sleeping naked, to feel a low, thrumming ache deep in the tendons and muscles of his throat to go with the gentle, expected pulse of morning wood between his legs--he knows how he gets on set with Sebastian, so close to him, breathing in his cologne, watching his face evolve, choking back the constant urge to praise his skill, his beauty, his everything.

Chris knows, immediately, with such a sensation around his neck even without the assistance of a mirror that he's got bruising, probably faint. He's just pale enough for it to show, he's sure, but, yes, bruising.

Huh.

Chris swallows on reflex, his mouth suddenly dry, then again on purpose, reveling in the ghostly, intimate sensation of squeezing touch. Tight. Touch. Just enough constriction to make him start to feel the edge of dizzy, like being tipsy.

Yeah.

The memories of yesterday lazily replay in Chris' tired mind.

A shiver rolls through him, leaving behind an army of goosebumps raised over his bare skin despite the heat of his body trapped in his bedsheets. The idea of Sebastian touching him--touching him--his mark left on his body, pressed into his skin, reminding him of exactly what he did, grabbed him and pulled him close, biceps fucking bulging, shoulders shifting, eyes so intense, mouth pink, face, just, like that.

God.

Chris remains in his bed, swallowing, sweating, and... thinking... for a little longer than he should.

He's late for his call time.

And he absolutely does not blush when the makeup artist clicks their tongue, carefully brushing their fingers across his jaw this way and that to get a sense of the bruising, and tells him he should ask the director for a raise. The stunt performers get adjustments, you know, when they take a really hard fall, so should you. That, or, see if you can bruise Seb up in return--they don't mean it, everyone loves Seb on set. It's impossible not to, look at the guy!

Chris doesn't want a raise. He doesn't want... he wants... he kinda wants Seb to do it again. He might really want to ask Seb to show him how so he can use it against him 🥴🥴 He wants red-faced and gasping and hitching breaths that are more moans than anything else, he wants eyes rolling back, he wants trembling, he wants lips loosely whimpering tighter, harder, more, please 😮‍💨

#you KNOW at least once during those takes Chris' breath hitched and then came out rough... almost like a moan... almost like he really liked #feeling seb's hand around his throat more than he should #fandomfluffandfuck #chris evans #sebastian stan #evanstan #rpf #real person fanfiction

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fishyfishyfishtimes · 4 months ago

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Apologies if you have received a similar ask before, but I would love to know where you get most of your cool fish facts from! Do you just absorb them via osmosis from the fishy world we live in, or is there a specific book or website that you use? Love your blog, I find it really comforting to scroll through if I’m feeling scared or sad, it always puts a smile on my face :D

Great question! I gain information here and there from books and documentaries and shows and the interwebs, so through osmosis as you put it hehe, but whenever I make fish facts it’s not simply enough to half-remember a piece of information that might be outdated or misremembered, therefore I very much turn to real world concrete evidence! Some websites I turn to often are Fishbase, Seriously Fish, A-Z Animals, National Geographic and Wikipedia (dun dun duunnn — Ahh I’m kidding, Wikipedia is a fine place to check information as long as you check multiple sources, wink!). I also find the websites of aquariums very helpful! Georgia Aquarium, Monterey Bay Aquarium, Maretarium (in English too!), etc., they present information about many fish and other aquatic animals in their care! But seriously, definitely check out Fishbase. Sometimes the articles are bare, but oftentimes they have information that can’t be found elsewhere and it’s where I always start a fish fact.

Most of the books I’ve read, well, I either don’t remember the name anymore or they were in Finnish, but I have gotten several facts from What a Fish Knows by Jonathan Balcombe. That book? It’s absolutely FANTASTIC!!!! Taught me so much about fish, and I already knew a decent amount!! Love it love it love it :DD I urge every single person in the world to read it honestly, it gives a lot of insight into the lives and experiences of fish and why their current perception in media and culture needs to end. Check it out, you’ll learn a lot!

#oftentimes if i have a fish fact to tell in mind i very quickly check the validity of the claim again #in case it has changed or i was taught plain wrong #i never want to spread misinformation if i can help it #asks #anon #anonymous

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buckevantommy · 1 month ago

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bobby no!!!!!! how could they do this to athena? forget Buck being unlucky in love, athena has him beat on that front.

the tommy entrance was banger though- helicopters are just sexy

soooo.. i haven't actually watched the ep yet (or last week's) i've just been absorbing the happenings through dash osmosis..

but, it truly is a wildly insane choice to make not just for bobby's character but for those who love him, especially athena and buck.

it just feels like an unnecessary dead end (forgive me) in terms of plot and how it affects the storylines of everyone, just more lazy writing from a man who has fumbled and broken the narrative too many times already this season, someone who hasn't learned from every piece of media that killed off beloved and central characters for shock-value or as some ill-concieved plot device to try and prompt other characters into "growth" (and dramatic grief) as though that's the only way for the plot to progress.

it must be said: killing off characters is the LAZIEST and lbr rudest way to get rid of a character. and killing off a beloved main character for no other reason than shock value??? it just speaks to tim's inability to actually write for these complex characters that fans care about; he doesn't have the imagination to continue exploring bobby's timeline, like he really thought: might as well kill him off and let the others deal with that, that'll give us some tasty angst haha. like, seriously???

i direct you to Supernatural, wherein over and over the writers chose to ignore sense and fans and continuity and chose death and grief and hurt, over winning the good fight and hope and comfort - which is what the show had come to mean to fans. but 9-1-1 has always been brighter than spn, more hopeful and more respectful of the ensemble cast's storylines and found family elements - and then season fucking 8 happened:

the angsty potential of gerrard and ortiz was wasted. eddie's storyline has been a mess for a season and a half. karen and maddie have been all but relegated to housewifemother roles plus a superfluous violent event in leiu of character-studies and interwoven b-storylines. the fucking brad self-flaggelation hogging screentime and ruining plot potential. the mess of bucktommy's relationship (some good stuff, but the inclusions of fucking abb*y and b*ddie and now bobby's death is tainting their timeline and isn't allowing them to stand on their own as an already narratively rich lovestory). the overall lack of overlapping stories for the ensemble cast, the ooc character choices (espcially dialogue) for 90% of them, the wasted plot potential for everyone in most of the eps, i just—

i'm sure there's more but i've skipped so many episodes this season bc of all these fuckass reasons..

it truly baffles me that tim got this longer season at a new more inclusive network and yet every other episode it's like he's driving the show off a fucking cliff and thinking it's fun to fly - not thinking about the impact and what it will do to the fanbase riding along with him.

*heavy fucking sigh*

but yes, at least we finally FINALLY got tommy being a hot af competent loyal hero pilot.

#bobby nash #911gate #i haven't really reblogged any bobby gifsets yet bc i'm not as deep in the feels but when i finally watch the ep expect a flood 😭💔#911 8x15 #asks #.txt

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