#i love all these characters and without spoilers

[revelboo]

Thoughts/ Headcanons

Spoilers for my storylines below the cut. Not smut, but mentions of.

• First off, I’m a paranormal romance writer- vastly different lifespans between partners is pretty common. And while it’s fun to spin that angst and drama, we do tend to write in ways around it to extend the human partner’s lifespan after we’re done with having the characters dance around each other.

• First thought, seminal fluids. Cybertronians are able to self repair to an extent, figure it’s something like nanites playing the part of our own immune systems within them. And that some of those get passed along to a partner when they do the deed. And linger, adapting and doing their thing: repairing damage. A one night stand wouldn’t be enough to do much but over and over? Each time replenishing those nanites, it would begin to slow that human’s aging to a crawl as long as they’re staying intimate with that Cybertronian and neither would probably notice anything for some time. Years, most likely.

• On spark bonds, those are a bit more complicated. Almost a symbiotic relationship. They can be full bonds if both parties submit fully to each other, trust each other. Or very one sided, with one taking everything and dominating the other.

• Intentional one sided bonds would have been taboo before the war, I’d think. Almost a form of torture with one Cybertronian claiming the other, creating a dependency in the one claimed. A need to seek out the dominant to renew that bond periodically, but without any balance, any affection between the two there might have been to begin with would fall into hatred and resentment. I’d think this would have happened more often during the start of the war, if a lover was found to be sympathetic to the other side, forcing a bond to keep them from leaving. With a Cybertronian, it’d be forcing the plating over the spark chamber open to form the bond, so it’s a violent occurrence and traumatic. But one sided bonds could still occur between two willing Cybertronians if one isn’t as certain about that commitment as the other even unconsciously.

• With humans, contact with any part of our body to a spark will bridge that initial bond. And just like with Cybertronians it can be one sided or full. With a one sided bond, a human would be dependent on the Cybertronian to renew the bond occasionally so the strain doesn’t eventually kill us. Most initial bonds with humans would likely be one sided and only become full over time as both sides get past their hesitations, doubts, and hang ups. A one sided bond can be broken with the death of one partner.

• I imagine a full bond is permanent, tethering two sparks or a spark and a soul together. With Cybertronians, it’s a combining of life forces. If something happens to one, the other’s spark falters and extinguishes. With a human partner, they’re bound to their partner’s spark and their lifespan. They’ll live as long as their Cybertronian partner does, which could be its own sort of hell, outliving everyone they know. And if the two grew apart over time, fell out of love, the nature of the bond would pull them back together at least periodically to renew the bond so they don’t both suffer. And most likely, that relationship would involve the Cybertronian just refusing to let their partner go, becoming extremely possessive of protecting that bond whether the human wants to be with them anymore or not.

• About the storyline titles: a few of you have already figured it out, but they’re all Motion City Soundtrack song titles. And I know a few of you have mentioned finding comfort in the fics and that means the world to me, so in case any of you need it, these are the lyrics for “It’s a Pleasure To Meet You” by the same band as it’s sort of become my anthem for all the storylines.

You are not alone

We've all had our battles with darkness and shadows

I'm here to let you know

It's a pleasure to meet you

Can you feel it, disappearing

It'll happen, you are not alone

I've been there, I'm still there

Oh, and better

Everything is so damn tragic

Time erodes the waves of panic

Take it in

You are not alone

We've all had our battles with darkness and shadows

I'm here to let you know

It's a pleasure to meet you

Today is all we have

So try for a moment to break from the torment

And sing this to yourself

It's a pleasure to meet you

At a distance

There's a difference

Things will make sense

You are not alone

Got to hold on for the moment

Till the next one

Everything is so damn tragic

Time erodes the waves of panic

Get up

You are not alone

We've all had our battles with darkness and shadows

I'm here to let you know

It's a pleasure to meet you

Today is all we have

So try for a moment to break from the torment

And sing this to yourself

It's a pleasure to meet you

Every damn night for years of my life

I've spent driving around this miserable city

Just looking through windows at people

Alone for an answer or reason to live

But every day since, I've been peeling away

At this counterfeit skin just got in the way

I can see my reflection and clearly can say

It's a pleasure to meet you again

You are not alone

We've all had our battles with darkness and shadows

I'm here to let you know

It's a pleasure to meet you

Today is all we have

So try for a moment to break from the torment

And sing this to yourself

It's a pleasure to meet you

It's a pleasure to meet you

It's a pleasure to meet you

[magesforthedas]

Just have to share this, because I keep seeing critiques of Veilguard that like, try to guilt people who say they love, or even like the game. And HEAVY critiques of the protagonist, Rook, and how they aren't really a hero.

ALSO it contains some SPOILERS so just be warned ☺️ and an edit of additional thoughts now!

Like, yeah I have a couple gripes about the game, but overall it's emotional and amazing and I care about the characters so deeply. I keep seeing how people are saying how Rook and the party were not well written because they caused a lot of death?? This is Dragon Age, everything always goes from bad to worse, but the characters always bring out the light.

Rook was put in a very shitty situation, and I've seen people say they caused the destruction of thousands by trying to prevent the hundreds. But how many people, before the game came out, said Solas's plan to tear down the veil was a bad idea? Not all, I'm sure, but most. I always viewed it, and I know I wasn't alone, as that by trying to "fix" things Solas was just justifying his selfish wants, when he knew somewhere in his heart that the people of today, including the elves that he was "doing this for", would rather live alongside their friends & family in a world without their old magic, than live in a world with it alone.

That being said, even with differing views in and out of the game, it's very reasonable that a group of people would try to stop him, not know the consequences. And the beautiful thing about Rook, why Varric chose THEM, is that they saw what they had created, and didn't give up, didn't leave it to someone else to fix. Whether or not it was really their fault they stepped up and tried to save the world the best they could, from the mistake they unwittingly made (which I would argue against the fact that they made a "mistake", looking at that they were hired to do a job & by successfully completing that job there were unintended consequences).

Parallels anyone? Dragon Age loves those. But the difference, again illustrated in the game, is that while Solas couldn't move past the regret of his mistakes, Rook could. And on the topic of the deaths of those around them, not everyone that died in the past was Solas's fault, but some he did directly lead to their deaths. And he accepted that, did it over & over. Rook never led anyone to their death. Rook walked willingly into it themselves, and the love and trust their companions felt led them to choose to die for Rook, and the world instead.

And people who say the destruction of the south means the earlier games were for nothing? How so? 20 years ago, 10 years ago, things were happening, people were dying that needed saving. The heroes of that age saved the world so it would still be around to save now. And who knows what the south really looks like, or what it might look like as and after rebuilding? We will, in another 10 years once BioWare comes out with more content I suppose, and I wouldn't be surprised if everyone we knew is dead, but I also wouldn't be surprised if many, many of them lived.

Because that is Dragon Age. Death, betrayal, sacrifice, cruelty, pain. It's a dark, dark world. But there is always a ray of light, of hope. And characters who will do their utmost to protect that .

EDIT: Adding!! To this!! And more spoilers!!!

We know because of the Wetlands that it's possible to cause the Blight to pull back. In the end scene, as people are being broken out of the Blight Roots, it seems to me like it's died, at least to some degree. In my playthrough, Neve was cured of her blight sickness. There's obviously some immediate changes, and that all means that the South could have had an immediate reprieve. Plus, once more surviving wardens from Weisshaupt are free to travel south, and all the factions up north get things relatively in order, the South could get a lot of assistance.

The South was overrun... By hordes, by growths? That's the land, what about the people? Could the combined might of the Inquisitor, the Chantry, The Free Marches, Fereldan's ruler, have evacuated enough people that the death toll might be high, but not totally catastrophic? Enough people have survived to rebuild, maybe with a better, more unified attitude towards one another?

(The last bit may be wishful thinking 🥲)

But still!! We have no idea what exactly happened down there. And no matter what, Rook did the best they could, they WERE a hero, and made a difference not only for the North, but everywhere affected.

And yes, I might complain about this or that, mainly that we don't get to put more past game decisions in.... But I love this game and that won't change.

[ysaona]

— Act 2, s2, arcane spoilers.

First of all WHAT THE FUCK! Isha dying was a cannon event; I’m not even going to lie, but her using three of the gems like Jinx did crushed me. Even when Jinx said, “You know, you remind me of her in some way,” referring to Isha reminding Jinx of her old self, Powder. All I could think about was Isha thinking in her head, maybe even saying in her head, “I can help them!” just like Powder did in Season 1, Act 1, Episode 3. When it came to trying to save them in the end of Act Two.

Also, rip our glorious god Viktor. I don’t think he’s dead if I’m being honest. I think the doctor is gonna be doing a number on him to bring him back.

I just can’t believe how overall perfect it was with Jinx being able to stand next to Caitlyn without Caitlyn wanting to rip that laughter out of her throat lol. I had a personal theory that Caitlyn would see all the havoc being caused and, even through all the grief she was going through, she’d turn against her people and find her way back to Vi, and I was right! (In a way.) I’m so happy. At first, I thought all second act that CaitVi was not gonna be canon, but BOY was I wrong! I just know they’re having rough Sesbian lex at the end of Act Three.

I’m very nervous to see how Jinx will be, especially if Isha does die, which seems like she does. How grief will play a role in her character development. It would genuinely be for the worst. Knowing that Jinx said having Isha was like wearing glasses, and she loved and cared for her no matter what, but you could tell they were doomed from the start. Isha fell in love with how Jinx was a symbol of Zaun and how she was looked at as a hero. That’s why Isha wanted to be like Jinx so badly and looked up to Jinx.

ALSO WHERE IS MY MOMMY SEVIKA AUGHHH I MISS HER COME HOME SHE HAD LIKE NO SCREEN TIME ):

Okay, sorry how this is all over, lol. Feelings are new; I literally just finished watching it, guys. 😓 Okay, love you all so much, bye! Also, thank you all for 942 followers. I can’t believe you guys ACTUALLY LISTEN TO ME, LOL. BYE, BABIES!!!

[alwaysahiccupandastrid]

Gladiator II - Thoughts (SPOILERS)

I was fortunate enough to watch Gladiator II at the Royal Global premiere at Leicester Square last night (Wednesday 13th November) and I NEED to share some thoughts but there are definitely some spoilers, so…

I cannot stress this enough:

THERE ❗️ ARE ❗️ SPOILERS ❗️ BELOW ❗️ THE ❗️ CUT ❗️

Once again

⚠️ DO NOT CLICK THE READ MORE IF YOU DO NOT WANT SPOILERS FOR GLADIATOR II ⚠️

There’s probably things I’m missing/forgetting right off the top of my head, and I might be paraphrasing/summarising some dialogue. I definitely need to rewatch it when I’m NOT super close to an IMAX cinema screen because I spent the whole movie with my neck craned backwards and my eyes darting everywhere because I was trying to take it all in.

Anyway, without further ado:

The opening credits were very beautiful, it recounted the plot of the original film but kind of like in the style of the opening credits of Pillars of the Earth? I don’t know if that makes sense 😭

If I remember correctly, Joseph is billed third behind Paul and Pedro, and Fred is billed fourth 🥹♥️

The film opens with a huge battle where the Roman army, led by Marcus Acacius, conquering the last free city of Africa (I think?), which is what Lucius and his wife are trying to defend

I cannot for the life of me remember what Lucius’ wife was called but she seemed nice, we only had her for a few minutes though before she got killed 😭

Okay so I’m going to start right off the bat by talking about the Emperors as they were the ones I was most looking forward to seeing, and I want to give them their own section!

We NEED to talk about Fred as Caracalla - this isn’t even me being biased, I’m being as unbiased as I can when I say that he was AMAZING

By the way, for months I’ve seen people talk shit about Fred, complaining about how they wish it was Barry Keoghan, whinging because “we could have had Joe and Barry” - to those people I say, shut the fuck up ☺️ I will NOT tolerate any hate for my boy Fred!

Fred actually had a much meatier part than Joe which was pleasantly surprising. I’m not saying Joe wasn’t unhinged or good, but he was way more sane than Fred’s character and you got the feeling that he was trying to hold their rule together and keep his brother from bringing down the whole empire

Caracalla surprised me because he was so much more softly spoken than I anticipated; in so many scenes he was childlike and almost pitiful to watch. For example, there were times where you could see him pouting or fidgeting like a bored toddler, at one point he essentially threw a tantrum and Geta had to hold him back from killing Acacius and Lucilla (and then in the background you could see him playfully swing the sword about like a child would with a toy) He would grin and get excited like a child whenever there was fighting or bloodshed, bouncing in his seat, he looked surprised and excited in the beginning when Geta handed him wine etc.

In the last coliseum fight scene, this was literally Caracalla getting excited when the fighting started - a literal child 😭

Honestly it was just fascinating to watch Caracalla because you could never tell if he was going to be childlike and almost-innocent or if he was going to start screaming and get violent

So apparently the reason that Caracalla is unhinged is because (to quote Geta) “the disease from his loins has spread to his head” (to paraphrase) which makes me think he’s got syphilis or something.

Also both of the emperors are briefly seen with concubines (as in the trailer), and Caracalla has both male and female ones hanging around him 😭 we love a bisexual Emperor!

Caracalla seems to have memory problems (probably as a result of his STI) because he doesn’t remember seeing Lucius fighting in front of them from just a couple of days ago at their party (the scene with the concubines) and Geta tries to remind him, “it’s the poet” but Caracalla just sits down and says he doesn’t remember

There’s a scene where Marcus and Lucilla are brought to the emperors in the middle of the night after being caught in a conspiracy to overthrow them, and you’ve got Geta in that red robe from the trailer whilst Caracalla is basically just wearing a fucking bedsheet toga style 😭 you know that shot in White Lotus where Fred/Quinn has a duvet around himself? Kind of like that

Contrary to that Letterboxd review calling the twins “BJ brothers”, there is NO incest in this film, and no hint of incest between the twins. I know a screenshot is circulating of Joe in the red robe where you could see what looked like the top/side of Fred’s head as if he’s on his knees, but they were absolutely NOT doing that 💀 the scene shows them both entering the room (Geta in his robe, hastily put on) and Fred in his bedsheet toga thing. I definitely didn’t get the vibe of incest at all, I got the vibe of “it’s the middle of the night and they’ve both been woken up because these two traitors (Marcus and Lucilla) were caught plotting against them”

I love that Caracalla’s weakness is Dondas (or Dundas? Different magazines are using different names so I’m so confused), his pet monkey (WE FUCKING LOVE CHERRY AND SO DOES FRED 😭♥️) Like he’s got Dondas/Dundas wearing a fucking dress and on a little chain lead, eating sweets from a bowl, and I have to applaud Fred for being able to act with a straight face while he had the monkey crawling over his shoulders, touching his hair, and at one point when the monkey moved the chain lead literally went right around/over his face

While there’s riots going on outside the palace, Caracalla is freaking out and has Dondas/Dundas the monkey on his shoulder, and Geta straight up threw wine at both of them before saying that maybe Dondas (or Dundas, whatever the fucking name is) go and calm down in another room 💀

There’s a scene where Macrinus finds Caracalla hiding under a table with the monkey and it made me think they were almost playing hide and seek 😭 truthfully I think he was just under there crying and hiding

It’s the fact that Macrinus was able to manipulate Caracalla into killing Geta by using his love of Dondas/Dundas against him; the people of Rome protest against their emperors, and Macrinus basically tells Caracalla that Geta is going to throw him to the plebs outside to be killed - and Dondas/Dundas. “Think about what they might do to Dondas” (or Dundas) - and that’s what pushes him over the edge.

NOT CARACALLA AND MACRINUS SAWING GETA’S FUCKING HEAD OFF LIKE THAT 😭 IT WAS STRAIGHT UP LIKE A HORROR FILM WITH MACRINUS COMING UP BEHIND CARACALLA AND HELPING?!?

Also Caracalla made the monkey a fucking consul of state (I think) after he killed Geta?!?! 😭 Absolutely fucking UNHINGED I TELL YOU

“ALL HAIL DONDAS! 😃” (or Dundas - again, someone please tell me the fucking monkey’s confirmed name)

They showed Geta’s head for WAY too long 😭 and Macrinus just showing it around like that?!? NASTY

Reeling over the fact they airbrushed out Geta’s head for the trailer because in this shot in the film Geta’s head is clearly visible on the table behind Denzel 💀

Sorry but Fred looked damn fine in that purple outfit near the end 😋

I feel like Caracalla had a little bit of a soft spot for Lucilla but the two sides of his personality were warring with each other: the sadistic bloodthirsty side wanted to murder both her and Marcus right away, but then near the end he whispers to Macrinus “must we kill Lucilla?” and he sounded a little hesitant or unsure which was interesting

Seeing Fred as Caracalla without Geta in that last coliseum battle scene? I can’t help but love him, Fred is seriously too good in this role. The shouting, the childlike excitement when the fighting started (see gif above)

Fred was definitely playing up the childlike side of Caracalla in his last scene when the people started revolting, he was literally curling up in his seat, snivelling and crying like a baby until Macrinus killed him from behind (he put something in his ear, i think he stuck a pin in his ear to impale his brain?) Truly pitiful end for Caracalla.

Once again: Fred Hechinger for Best Supporting Actor at the 97th Academy Awards campaign!! 😊↕️

Okay so now I’ve talked about the Emperors, I can talk about the rest of the film:

Ridley Scott truly said fuck historical accuracy in this film 😭 which is not surprising to be fair if you know him and his movies

This film was, expectedly, VERY bloody and violent from start to finish

NOT LUCIUS TAKING A BITE OUT OF THE BABOON 🤯

At one point where they’re bringing the slaves into Rome, they show statues of a wolf feeding two human children from her teat and Lucius recounts the story - this is obviously a reference to Romulus and Remus, twins raised by a wolf mother. This is actually really fitting because from earth on, Ridley AND Fred and Joe have mentioned the idea of the twins being based on this Romulus/Remus story?

DAMN, Paul Mescal was super beefy in this film like holy fucking shit dude

Honestly I adore Pedro but his role was way smaller than I thought it would be. His role is essentially to be Lucilla’s decent and loyal husband who also happened to lead the invasion that killed Lucius’ wife in the beginning of the film, something he did not want to do, hence why Lucius wants to kill him so badly (family drama, eh? 😭) and who is part of a plot to dethrone the twins

MATT LUCAS AS THE MASTER OF CEREMONIES?!? 😭 I won’t lie, at first it distracted me because I was like “why the fuck is Matt Lucas here” but he got a few laughs out of the cinema screening so his tiny parts added a little bit of humour to the film when it got tense

As I said above, there’s no incest shown - there is a MENTION, however, of a rumour that Lucius’ real father wasn’t Lucius Verus(?) but rather Commodus (obviously Lucilla’s brother/Lucius’ uncle from the first film). However, it’s not true because they make it very clear that Lucius’ father is Maximus. They do however briefly mention that Lucilla was a child bride at the age of 14 which is a bit fucked up

I was probably the only person in my screening who noticed this but at one point I saw graffiti on one of the walls on the outside/entrance to the coliseum that said something like “Irrumbo Imperators” - according to Google, that translates as “I attack the emperors”. However, it could have also been “Irrumabo Imperatores”, and if you ask Google to give you the Latin word for “fuck”? It’s “Irrumabo”. So essentially there was graffiti in the film that either said “attack the emperors” or “fuck the emperors” 💀

I thought that maybe Lucius had somehow forgotten that Lucilla was his mother despite being 12 when she sent him away but nope, he’s fully aware of who he actually is and who his mother is, he’s just angry at her for sending him away and never seeing him again 😭

NOT THAT SERVANT TATTLING ON LUCILLA AND MARCUS?!? 😤

They killed Marcus off WAY earlier than I thought they would by the way. The trailers give the impression that the final battle is Lucius vs Marcus but it’s actually Lucius vs Macrinus which is WILD to me

You know that scene in LOTR where the orcs shoot Boromir full of arrows? That is basically what happened in this film to General Acacius but with about 20 more arrows 💀 I had major Boromir flashbacks watching this scene

I’m glad that Lucilla and Lucius got to reconcile before the ending, given what ended up happening

“Because Emperor Caracalla is generous, he will allow Lucilla to have one Gladiator to fight to defend her” - ONE. ONE AGAINST ABOUT 30 TRAINED GUARDS 💀

I’m still reeling over the fact Derek Jacobi spoiled his own character’s death on the red carpet a mere hour before the film screening in front of THOUSANDS of people 😭 that man did NOT give a fuck quite frankly and I think that’s kind of hilarious of him

THE GASP THAT EVERYONE IN THE SCREENING COLLECTIVELY LET OUT WHEN MACRINUS KILLED LUCILLA BY SHOOTING HER IN THE CHEST?!? HE KILLED CARACALLA AND LUCILLA IN 60 SECONDS FLAT 😭

That said, this shot from the behind the scenes featurette about Ridley Scott is ten times funnier to me after watching the film and realising that not only is Ridley showing Denzel how to shoot the arrow that kills Lucilla, but Fred is also supposed to be dead in the chair at this point since Macrinus takes the bow and fires the arrow straight after killing Caracalla 😭

Poor Lucius has now seen his father, his mother, his uncle and his wife all die right in front of him, the man CANNOT catch a break 😫

That final battle between Lucius and Macrinus was GRUESOME 😳 Lucius cut off his hand and slashed him - I’m not sure if he actually cut him in half or if Macrinus just crumpled in the river in a heap but DAMN

This film used footage from the first Gladiator film so they gave the actor who played Lucius in the first film a credit which was nice!

That said, I know obviously it’s been 24 years since the original film so of course the child actor from the original is no longer 12 and so could not be in the flashback scenes showing young Lucius, but damn the difference was a little jarring to be honest, especially when it went from footage of the original film to new footage with the new child actor

Ridley Scott spoiled the ending of this fucking movie by saying he wanted to have Paul back to play Lucius again as the main character in Gladiator III 💀 so yeah, I already knew Lucius was surviving this film

Some final summary thoughts:

Let’s be honest, it would be impossible to top the first Gladiator and so while I loved Gladiator II and think it was amazing, it was obviously never going to quite reach the same level as the original

I know I just made the comment about nominating Fred for Best Supporting Actor but I have to be honest, I truly think Denzel deserves the nomination - if there’s only one actor from this film who gets that nomination, it has to be Denzel because he was by far the standout of the whole film. If I had to rank it personally I’d say Denzel and then Fred is a close second, then maybe Joseph and Pedro?

^ This isn’t me saying Joe and Pedro were bad at all, they were all really amazing, but this film just had so many characters and quite frankly Fred, Joe and Pedro had WAY less screentime than Denzel so they didn’t have nearly as much to work with as he did.

Again; I’m biased because I went in the most excited to see the Emperors, but I wish we’d had more of Caracalla and Geta. Fred and Joe did their best to work with what they were given, but they didn’t have that much and pretty much all of their scenes were shown in trailers or TV spots etc.

GIVE CHERRY THE MONKEY A FUCKING OSCAR

I obviously wasn’t expecting Paul Mescal to fight real baboons, rhinos and sharks but the CGI was… not great. It was quite obvious that it was CGI for the baboons and sharks, I think the rhino was slightly better though (Fred mentioned in an interview his first day involved “the mechanical rhino” so it was somewhat partly practical as well I suppose)

The pacing of this film was a little all over the place, if I’m being honest. I want to rewatch soon, from further back in the screen because, as I said, I was craning my head back the whole time and it ended up giving me a neck and headache so that probably added to me being uncomfortable (plus I’d had a long day and was thoroughly burned out by the time the screening started), but there were times where I was like “oh… we’re back here then 😐”

^ What I’m trying to say is that some of the storylines happened so fast and had very little build up (eg. The emperors in general) whilst other plots were so slow burn in comparison.

The music was so good! I know people are going to compare it unfavourable to Hans Zimmer’s original score from the first film, but I LOVE Harry Gregson-Williams (he did the soundtrack for the first two Narnia films so I’m biased 😅) and I thought he did a great job with the score here. The fact he had Hans Zimmer’s approval and praise made me confident the score would be great anyway

I feel like people are obviously going to compare Paul Mescal to Russell Crowe which… let’s be honest, has gotta suck for him because how the fuck do you live up to Russell Crowe?!? Some people have already said that they didn’t like Paul in this film, which… okay, fair enough. I honestly don’t think comparing him to Russell Crowe does him any favours. I enjoyed watching him personally, and I think given that this whole film rests on him, he did great. Not quite Russell Crowe but I have no complaints about his performance personally.

People are also going to compare Joe and Fred to Joaquin Phoenix’s Commodus, and I think they both did a great job given that they didn’t actually have nearly as much screen-time as Joaquin did in the original film. It’s almost unfair to compare them because in the first Gladiator, Commodus was the main antagonist - in this film, Macrinus is the main antagonist overall whilst the Emperors are more secondary antagonists that serve as obstacles for Macrinus’ rise to power. But they both did great with what they had.

Overall, my opinion of the film?

This film NEEDS to be seen on a big screen at the cinema! Go and watch it!

[allmannerofmalady]

In continuation of my clownery, I started a new DATV playthrough because my beloved Inquisitor looked so jarring I had to remake her and replay like 20 hours of the game. But hey, I made peace with the fact that I am playing DATV to wrap up Inquisition and get an ending scene at this point, I'm not currently foreseeing a second playthrough, so I gotta do it right, y'know?

Spoilers, and me complaining at extreme length, yet again, about my own personal expectations vs reality into the void. Please ignore if DATV negativity is something you prefer to stay away from, protect your peace & what you enjoy.

So I replay HOURS. I'm having fun killing everything as fast as I can - I don't know what it is about playing as a rogue in this game that has tickled my ADHD brain so much, but I'm surprisingly really good at the arrow bonanza and relentless enemy aggro?! This turn based bitch? I digress.

I see my bb Inquisitor Lavellan - she still doesn't look like herself, but I can live with it. She got some ill-advised fillers in Tevinter, she's been through a lot, let her LIVE.

This time around my strategy is pure lore hunting. I'm getting every codex, I'm SQUEEZING this playthrough for whatever lore/easter eggs I can get because idk if I'm going to play again. I got all of Solas' murals early on, got Mythal's essence before Weisshaupt even, I think. BUT WAIT! I have one more treat! The locked room in the Lighthouse! Solas' study! There must be something juicy for all the effort, right? RIGHT? :'D

I know it's been beaten to death, but PERSONALLY, the game still feels incredibly flat to me, jarringly so. If I'm in the Dreadwolf's home, I want to snoop. I want Rook to look through his library, his books, his garbage bin. I even remember the devs saying they wanted being in the Lighthouse to feel an old friends house, or something? I could be wrong, my brain is fried. It's not just a Solas thing - I'm playing this game because I'm desperate for info about the characters I love, but as Rook, we are IN Solas' HQ and I want to rip open the floorboards. I'm trying to RP as much as I can RP in this G.

Anyway, I was so thirsty for something more, something deeper than just these lovely environments I cant do much with, and notes on how Solas hoards raisins - so I collected the wisps and did all the things to unlock the second door in the Lighthouse, forever booboo the fool, thinking I would get some juicy content or something. Trying to stay positive.

No. NO. I got some gear, another empty room Rook has no comments on, and fine, some of Solas' observations on the anchor. It does seem to confirm he kept the Inquisitor’s arm aaaand I love him your honour.

Back to backflipping and shooting arrows in the air, and wanting to grab Emmrich by the beautiful lapels to shake him and ask about the Pentaghast family. Where's my WIFE --

On to the Weisshaupt mission, which was actually ridiculously fun to play - until I was told Weisshaupt is gone haha wow great love that at least the Inquisitor & gang are keeping Southern Thedas safe *subtle foreshadowing* 😃🤞 weeee

I was SO MAD at myself for expecting more like the clown that I am, it was something dumb but just annoyed me all over again and got me all… opinionated 🫠

So, I'm mad again. I cannot begin to articulate my feelings about the incredible amount of storylines and lore we've lost with the decisions made in DATV's writing - they've already been written so eloquently by much greater minds than myself. SO I'm just laughing my way through the pain 🤡

People pleaser that I am, I see other creators I've followed and loved for ages defend the game's choices, tell others they lack media literacy, that your criticisms mean you have rose tinted glasses about the previous games - whatever, your opinion can be valid without tearing others down. So, I genuinely thought something was wrong with me for being so hung up on details. But I can't even engage in fan theories anymore because I'm so jaded at this point. When I see new deep dives into lore-based theories on the game, 99% of the time my mind goes "There is no deeper meaning. They just wanted to wrap it up." Why do you think this thing happened? What do you think that thing is hinting? Nothing. And this is coming from someone who played all the games, owns all the novels, art books, World of Thedas I and II, the bloody Inquisitor lamp from the BioWare store LOL, I was primed and ready to engage in these conversations, but I can't. I have nothing to say that won't end in a cynical answer, and maybe that's because I'm also jaded by working in the game-adjacent VFX industry.

The factions are, yet again, fun but shallow, the logic confusing, and lack much of a backstory for Rook (I think Grey Wardens and Mourn Watchers seem to be the best developed from other reviews and playthroughs, I've only played extensively as a Shadow Dragon, to be fair). Why are you a mage in this one faction? Why are you a rogue in another when it doesn't make sense without a story to support it? It's all this beautiful candy floss that melts away the minute I stop and think about it. And then the cynic in me thinks - these are probably vestiges of the live service part of the game that EA was pushing for. I have to slap myself and stop looking for deeper meaning within corporate decisionsssss there is no swimming pool behind that closed door you needed 7 wisps for 😃

I desperately did not want this to be the case. I was hyped. I preordered the game and organized vacation around it, I'm too old and dealing with way too many crappy personal things to just be a hater for the sake of being a hater. Gaming and Dragon Age are my comfort spaces. But for the LIFE of me, I can't imagine playing DATV again once I finish, let alone more times than I can count like the previous games. Or imagine listening to 4 hours of Youtube videos of party banter to analyze, or even imagine how companions would react to certain things because they feel so stiff. Everything is beautiful, but sterile.

I do love Emmrich - I'm enjoying his storyline and romance, it's like the loveliest most whimsical Vincent Price Pixar romance, but still, something is always missing with the characters even as some do grow on me. I can't imagine anything close to just the party banter ALONE between Solas and Iron Bull. Cole. Fenris and Anders. And to be clear - the whole DA was GRITTY and DARK, DAO supremacy - NOT ME. I love all the games but they have always been whimsical and silly, cringey at times, and did not take themselves seriously. I remember doing the quest where Hawke is running around trying to keep Aveline's date with Donnic from going south, cracking up at how ridiculous it was, and just thinking - gods I LOVE this game.

Speaking of romance, while I'm enjoying how sweet the romance with Emmrich is, when I see others complaining about lack of spice... ahem. I still cannot get over the art style when it comes to characters. This is subjective, and a me problem - I still find it jarring. I don't like the proportions, the bloom, how smooth everyone looks. They still mostly look like cartoons to me, with no body hair and the big heads, and I find everyone's hands so distracting because they look like plasticine. I'm ok with no spice between these characters with their current designs lol let me leave it at that. Ok, except for Felassan and Solas, chef's kiss, no notes.

Solas and story elements directly around him still mostly hold the familiar weight, for the most part. I think credit goes to his amazing VA and the strength of what was likely written for his arc from the very start, before the rewrites and dev hell the game went through. I still have opinions, obviously, but even as a ride or die Solavellan I don't like having the Solavellan angle hijack conversations, so I'm not going to go there. If I'm going to criticize stuff I'll do it as a gamer/DA fan first, egg lover and apologist second.

As I reach the end of Act 2, the game continues to makes me feel like I'm stripped of all agency after a lifetime of playing choice-based games. I talk to companions when it allows me to, then they are relegated to set dressing. My conversation choices all feel the same, or don't match what I'm choosing sometimes. The Lighthouse does not feel like the vibrant hub it was sold as. I am on quests I mostly cannot accept or reject. I cannot interact with my surroundings unless it is gameified (light a candle, move a crystal). The companions abilities are all just - platforming? I know I sound hyperbolic, but it's all I can see currently.

I played Persona 5 from end to end, twice. I played FFXVI. I loved both, had no issues with their linear storytelling, and how the game led you to their end points. Those games are not DA, they did not have the expectations you would have from a BioWare title 10 years in the making. You were not lured in by tales of an incredible character creator, teased about what might be coming from previous games, told this was a sequel to an immersive fantasy RPG series in a beloved fantasy world where the defining studio mechanic was CHOICES MATTER, even when they changed a lot of other things from title to title. In P5/FFXVI you were Clive, you were Joker, you were playing out their story. They were not direct sequels to anything. I'm loathe to be seen as a mindless critic who just wants to shit on things, but a part of me does feel emotionally manipulated for $$$. I still resent how much hype was built for the game by maligning the previous ones (we're fixing Inquisition's mistakes!!).

I'm back to my mission of finishing the game I paid for, enjoy what I can, and get my Solavellan ending scene cause I'm down BAD for literally the only ship I have ever shipped🧍🏻‍♀️I appreciate that it was included. But also - wow does it exacerbate what wasn't included for everyone else's choices.

Something I hate is how everyone immediately jumped on the Baldur's Gate 3 comparisons - BG3 was a life changing game for me, but it's not perfect, and the comparisons are not fair. The one thing I will say is that when I first played BG3, despite its issues and the later criticisms of how Larian reacted to pressure from fans, I remember my earliest impression was - it feels good to be respected as a player. I didn't feel the game was talking down to me, and I got SO much for what I paid for (700 hours baybeee). Jaheira and Minsc were included as companions in homage to the previous games. Yes, they did Viconia dirty, nothing is perfect - but for example, Jaheira would tell you about her husband Khalid from the original games, which came out in 1998 and 2000. There was a lot of world building/easter eggs that not everyone was familiar with or even noticed, because not every player played BG1 and 2, or were familiar with DND 5e - but it was included. Drizzt Do’urden was mentioned ffs, they didn’t overthink about who read those books or not. I’m aware of my biases and I may very well be looking through rose tinted glasses, but I did not feel like the information was presented like I was dumb, or "ah they'll never understand this - SCRAP IT". It just feels like it’s there to honour the past and out of love for the world Larian were playing in.

—> edit to say that I do notice and enjoy the codex entries, callbacks to Tevinter Nights, Masked Empire, the older games. I wish that care and detail was woven into the main story and overall end product and not just background fluff. I know others are satisfied with those additions, wish that were me. I saw a tweet saying that every callback to a previous game or storyline actually pissed them off even more lol, I relate.

I don't feel that respect for the player in DATV, I'm sorry. There is love there, but as hard as I try, it feels like it's there despite of the overall design of the game, not part of it. I keep remembering interviews before the game was released and things that were promised, and I don't see it. At all. No more meaningless fetch quests!! Most companion-focused game! The quests are largely boring or formulaic, but addictive and fun because they are so packed with mindless combat that my brain enjoys. Sometimes it feels like filler - we didn't know what to add here, FIGHT! You unlocked a poignantly named gate in the Crossroads? NO STORY MORE FIGHT! And I'm eating it up, let me not be a hypocrite, I have 80 hours in the game. But personally, it feels designed to pad out this beautiful, sometimes fun, but bitterly shallow game. I can't even go into companion specifics because I have nothing to say, no story I want to analyze. Some have grown on me, but there is no bite or nuance to the writing that compels me and I have no urge to know more. In the previous DA games I would take the long route wherever I went just to get more banter from my companions, and I was instantly interested in them, even if I disliked them. I've seen the comments, I tried, I don't think it's because "I haven't spent enough time" with the DATV companions.

The level design of long narrow corridors, which do remind me of DA2 and FFXVI, has become so predictable to me that I almost always know exactly where I'm going to find loot. So it becomes this admittedly satisfying run of grabbing and fighting to the end point, getting the dopamine hits of collecting pointless stuff, but not really taking in the environments and enjoying the adventure. The level design is not immersive. These do not feel like real cities or real people, and that was intentional. It feels like “levels”, not a World. No one reacts to a single thing you do. Even in the ultra minimalist style of Zelda BOTW, townspeople would react to things you did. Sometimes I walk up to yet another obvious fight arena where the enemies are just chilling, waiting for me while standing still - almost like they're on shift at a haunted house LOL. I can imagine the Venatori stubbing out a cigarette, "C'mon guys, she's here, showtime". The funny part is this has all been seen before in older games, and it never bothered me. My own expectations and overhype might be to blame, but it feels like a big step back when so many games are stepping forward. Me = clown

I keep going back to my first reaction when the disappointment hit me. It feels like being given Persona 5 Strikers or Hyrule Warriors, and told that it's the sequel to the actual RPG. It's fun, it wears the skin of the thing you like that makes you happy, but stops there.

Other things I shake my fist at

Cheap ass The 6th Sense ass Varric death. Yes, yes, Solas villain arc whatever - it was cheap. Way to honour a multi-game beloved character and the player, even if the time had come for him to die in the story.

No, I cannot find a single redeeming reaction from a companion that makes Varric dying make sense in hindsight, except that they are all made of cardboard. I saw comments saying on a second playthrough it's clear Harding is in mourning - sorry, I don't see it.

So. Dorian, the Inquisitor, Charter, Harding, your party, Maevaris, Isabella, list goes on - not a single one of them asks about Varric or mentions his death? Expresses condolences? Nothing? Cheap. Even if Solas was playing with your mind, doesn't it make the overall characters in the game seem even more wooden and unrealistic to the player? It was not the gotcha they seem to think it is.

When the novelty of the cameos and the emotion associated wore off, they were just flat and felt random. Cassandra should have been there, doing Seeker shit (my WIFE). Ok no cameo? Casual dialogue with Emmrich about having a Nevarran in the Inquisition (or as the Divine?!) Lucanis info dumping about Josephine as an Antivan, Zevran as a Crow, nvm, time for a coffee joke. Merrill, eluvian queen, how is she a nonentity? Habibi Fenris should have been in the Shadow Dragons, spitting on the ground after being approached by Solas to join his uprising (lol what uprising amirite). Ok I'm cooking hire me Bioware 🍳 but at least they can remain untainted by the Isabella Treatment (tm)

This leads into the yeeting of the Keep, world states, choices, and hypocrisy around claiming to want to level the playing field for new players. No, all I can see is - it was treated as a buffet that they picked from as it suited. This is the one disappointment I will never let go of. Facsimile's of beloved character cameos were tossed in, you could not really talk to them outside of what limited dialogue you were allowed. Certain world states are now canon apparently - Dorian being recruited in the Inquisition, Morrigan drinking from the Well etc. You want a reboot and you've committed to tossing the choices and burning down Thedas (literally)? Go down with GLORY! Have all the previous main characters/companions alive. Have them all mentioned, even in passing. A portrait on a wall. Say goodbye to them, get your reboot. Honour what you built your business on. But yeah, Emmrich and Harding get to have their picnic in Fereldan fml bye

The argument of: well, the games are old now, it shouldn't matter. Ah - not too old to capitalize on the IP and DA name? Not too old to use some cameos to lure old players? The argument of - it was too many choices to track. Ok cut them down, but don't go scorched earth? 3 choices, mostly irrelevant to those who don't care about Solas (could never be me), and then literally telling you everything else in the South and Weisshaupt is now razed to the ground. But also the illuminati did everything.

FINALLY - the Inquisition should have been in charge of the hunt for Solas, hill I will die on. Fine, have Rook, but Inquisitor should have been the other protagonist. The people... who knew Solas best and betrayed by him... who were in an organization to save the world... Why did we have that cunty dagger stabbed into the map of Tevinter cliffhanger to have the Inquisitor reduced to a pyjama wearing husk BIOWAAAAAAAARE

It's this stuff that builds up, and makes me think - does this game hate its fanbase and source material that much? I very obviously need to go touch some grass 🤠

I keep engaging with Reddit, Tumblr, Twitter - all to my detriment because it makes me feel like there's something wrong with me for not loving it, all over again. I also desperately have a fic in me I would love to write, an ode to the story in my head from years of loving the world of Thedas, a love letter to my Lavellan and others - but idk what to do with the post-DATV world atp. I just want to get through Act 2/3, get my Solavellan smooch, ignore the ~secret Illuminati ending, and be grateful I'm not a Mass Effect fan so I don't have to go through this again 🐣

[androgymess]

ARCANE SEASON 2 YAP FEST, SPOILERS season 2 is rushed, to no ones surprise since netflix put a gun to everyone's head for an early release, but that aside, i do personally enjoy reading between the lines of the show

the jesus (smtimes moses) and judas (ramses can apply too) depiction of viktor and jayce, ambessa's protectiveness over mel making some real sense now, amebessa's foreshadowed death and mel picking up the pieces in the intro etc etc, all good stuff

i LOVE this season dont get me wrong, but the speedrunning and time skips (esp when caitlyn goes through TWO ARCS, IN LIKE, SPLIT SECONDS?) i do fucking hope she has not forgiven jinx all willy nilly after becoming reincarnation of hitler for a good minute there

like PLEASEEE TAKE UR TIME, WE SHOULD HAVE GOTTEN A SEASON 3 MAN. or atleast let the writers cook up for another 3 years, i LOVED the current two arcs of season 2 but i mourn the lack of fucking dialogue? jayce and viktor barely talking is crazy to me?

relying on songs (which are bangers) to carry the emotional weight of your scenes, we have MORE fight scenes than dialogue between important characters, i loved s1 because the characters...talked, you could fill in the subtext there too, at some point s2's subtext was just me over-reading into every aspect of the show, isha is a plot device at the end of the day, the noxian storyline didn't have enough time to stand on its legs, idk, show me more scenes with caitlyn going further unhinged and drowning in mourning that causes more death to people

plus the black rose stuff is...idk? introduced too quickly, that is one of the main problems with the show, it expects people to get emotionally attached to certain things or characters and neglects alot of its core cast in favor of progression

but when the plot starts progressing without your characters, it makes me as a viewer also lag behind. before anyone comes for my neck, like i said i LOVE seasons 2, i love it enough to be critical of its shortcomings in my humble nobody opinion, i loved not being spoonfed and babied by the show. i can even look past the pacing issues, but the plot devices we got this season is crazy, one offs, first draft storylines as one of my friends said, but eh, better we get arcane than have netflix cancel it.

to wrap this up, they are gonna explore more league storylines, probably in the works already so that is something to look forward to

[zhuoyichenpretty]

Eps 28-29 Speedrun...

I'm trying to play catch up after falling behind a bit, so here's just a highlight reel/speedrun (as much as I can speed...which is not very much tbh). The meta has dwindled down to nothing; I do apologize. This is very much just reaction-based. Also, I'll probably have to stay out of the tag once the express episodes come out, unless the site I'm watching on uploads those eps too.

Spoilers incoming!

Ep 28

Heh. ZYC's plausibly deniable jealousy is back and boy have I ever needed it. His cursing better be more intense now that he's basically confessed to ZYZ several times over lmao. And oh how precious he is, taking Ying Lei's ice marks comment seriously enough to double check his neck.

Ah. Watching WX's convo with Princess Longyu while knowing what happens in ep 29, the irony of her lie about being poisoned...Good (and terrible) stuff...

Oh god oh dear I was watching the whole acting ordeal through my fingers with preemptive second-hand embarrassment for ZYC. The moment WX pulled out her little booklet but we were cut off from seeing the msg, I knew, esp given the very pointed shots of the fish right before their whole convo haha. Not bad of a set-up imo, more subtly natural than usual which I like since I prefer explanatory flashbacks to have a bit more premeditation baked into the original scene for viewers to pick up on in real-time, which this show doesn't always do.

But oh my. I have to say this. I apologize in advance but it's in my damn handle so forgive me but—ZYC is so fucking lovely when sulky and embarrassed. I'm smitten. I had seen the director post those shots of TJR all dramatically lit and beautifully framed months ago and I had no idea it was going to be used for this. And this is coming off the heels of the previous episode's mpreg joke, which I'm still not over. This show's commitment to flustering ZYC's character needs to be studied and replicated in fanfics. Who said that? Not me. Anyway.

I've seen mixed reactions to ZYC not being in on the acting, but just for me personally, I like that it wasn't intentional for them to leave him out, and I really am glad to have heard his honest feelings in that moment. It felt significant to see him make that decision against even the rest of their family, and I'd personally rather it come out while the rest of them are playing at discord than actually seeing them fight internally just to witness ZYC draw his ultimatum so genuinely and seriously. It feels like yet another moment where the narrative is creatively committing subtext into text for us and for ZYZ to hear, without having to torment us with somehow worsening the stakes within their group to the extent that would elicit such a reaction.

WZY and Chongwu Camp really invest in a lot of latex skin huh?

Oh my god I love that PSJ sucks at acting too. Her panic at having to pretend lmfaooo. Also, this gets at something I really should have realized much earlier on, but the way ZYC and PSJ have so many similarities in disposition and belief, and also how WX and ZYZ overlap a lot in their inclination for acting and playful tricks and teasing—I love that. WX and ZYC each gravitating towards respectively familiar personalities in romantic partners, which actually very much happens irl. Basically seeking out personalities similar to their comforting (pseudo-)familial bonds. Also explains why I love both ZYC and PSJ so much.

Lmfao Ying Lei's theme song kicking in as he volunteers to hold onto the dragon scale really does get me. His song captures his character so well.

Any day I get to watch TJR inception-act as Ao Yin acting as ZYC is a good day for me. That little snarl of a reaction after Ying Lei pulled out his weapon is some good shit. I love that even the texture of his voice and the cadence of his line delivery is different (the stark contrast when actual ZYC shows up in the next scene is *chef's kiss*). And he is uniquely suited for batting his eyelashes, I must say.

Okay! Onto Ep 29:

First ZYC forgets how to count when he calls them a group of five...now ZYZ tricks Ying Lei into giving his all to protect an empty box...when will the grievances against Ying Lei end?

My live reaction to finding out WX's been fatally poisoned: ZYZ, ZYC, Bai Jiu, and WX passing around the hot potato of mortality.

I'm glad for some more emotional development on the Li Lun!Bai Jiu front! I feel like he's been on the back burner for a bit with the ZYC demonizing (which he caused anyway, lol). I am certainly intrigued by Ying Lei being around to hear Li Lun!Bai Jiu's monologue and what this may lead to. And it's been said but LZY (Bai Jiu's actor) does soooo well here it's such a great watch.

Also...Li Lun wants a roof (well, technically, eaves) to shelter from the rain and a lamplight in the dark? Sounds like a throuple with ZYC and ZYZ really might fix him tbh.

Justice for WX in ZYC's flashback from two years ago. She does not say "Are you stupid?" but more along the vibe of "Don't be silly" as she and ZYC discuss his snake bite. The subs are too literal here it makes her sound so out of pocket lmao

God I'm so glad PSJ slapped all of WX's will to live back into her in ep 27 because yes girl!!! Fight for your right to live!! Also, speaking of, where tf is PSJ ): Her girl is dying, why doesn't she get any screen time to react? Do I assume she knows or not?

But yay! The contract ripping was cute. As an aside, I do wish I personally felt enough of a spark between ZYZ and WX to ship them on my own because the writing is there for their pairing to be pretty solid. Like I've said before, they're sweet and good together but they just don't rot my brain. I wonder what's missing for me because I honestly like their acting much more than I expected to. Perhaps it could also be a matter of contrast, as some dynamics in the web of relationships stand out to me in terms of chemistry more than others, even if we're not talking strictly romantic (I mean, I'm of the belief that TJR could have chemistry with a brick wall if he wanted to). Anyway though, I'm going off topic. ZYZ and WX cute (and tragic)!

I gasped at ZYC going to meet WZY. That's what I call desperate measures.

Ha, ZYZ asking ZYC to protect him while he's weakened from the Ever-Burning Wood reminds me of CQL c:

Yooooooo ZYC grabbing the newly reforged Cloud Light Sword and all that gorgeous light. What a hero. Smitten, I say.

Ohhhh the Li Lun/ZYC superimposed images, the way I was holding my breath and worried for a second that ZYZ would call ZYC by the wrong name !!!! That's some legit ex-vs-current-lover storytelling like whew. But I needed ZYC to catch ZYZ a little better than that when he fell like embrace the man already pls

The cave scene!!!!! I'm looking through my fingers. I feel like I'm intruding. How many jade pendants does ZYC have on his person for ZYZ to drink at any given moment? And oh wow something about the framing of ZYC's hand on the wine bottle as he mixes it—what an intimate ritual. Feels like I watched ZYC make three separate confessions just seeing him pull out the jade, mix the drink for ZYZ, and hold it out to him with his eyes averted...And then he goes and lays his heart bare (again! once more on top of the conversation in ep 26 like he is really not letting any chance of misunderstanding arise he is trying to show his hand as much as possible wow). But yeah who's gonna gif the wine mixing for me?

Fuckkkk, they're zhiji, they said it, I'm going insane.

I love ZYZ's pause right before he drinks the first cup. Watching the gravity of this moment and ZYC's absolute sincerity hit him, settle on him. Such a meaningful and significant breath between actions. Like, we are allll aware of how serious this is.

ZYC holding intense eye contact while drinking the second cup??? Uh??? I really should be turning away now right? And ZYZ's stare back is truly indistinguishable from his openly loving looks at WX. I am on the floor.

All of ZYC's toasts are about ZYZ being a savior of some kind ;-;

Another live reaction: WHEN DID ZYC BECOME A SURGEON THEY JUST DID SURGERY ON ZYZ'S CORE IM CRYING.

ZYC most dramatic surgeon I've ever seen did you see the way his hair caught the wind? God but his nonchalance is killing me. Yes why not bare your heart and soul over some wine you mixed specifically for ZYZ and then operate on ZYZ's core in one sitting? All in a night's work I guess. Also ZYZ's still recovering from the Ever-Burning Wood oh my god someone take ZYC's license away what is this medical malpractice. Bai Jiu is out of commission for a little bit and all of a sudden everyone thinks they're a doctor smh.

All I have to say about the WZY meeting is sometimes I get so distracted by ZYC's eyelashes. Also goodbye and good riddance WZY! Unless the drama decides to pull a fast one on us, which is never beyond the realm of possibility here. But at least he burned.

PSJ is back :D Head empty except for how pretty her red cape is.

Ouuugh Li Lun who is constantly possessing people and obsessively making others look at the real him and Ao Yin who is constantly impersonating people and now asking to be remembered for how she actually looks. What a pair, I can see why they stuck together all this time. Also Ao Yin's true form is so pretty. Girl I know you killed a bunch of people and continuously framed our heroes and caused so so so much heartache for them but I'll remember your true form dw )-:

The borrowed sympathy Li Lun gets while in Bai Jiu's body is quite poignant and so complicated and tbh I want more of it. As someone who doesn't want him to go down this unfortunate path any further, I have hopes about the potential there, but it's probably safer to expect the worst.

Not sure if this more surface-level commentary is still fun to read, but this will probably be all I have time for from now til the end. And since I'll be staying out of the tag soon, it'll just be me shouting into the void for the next few days. Thanks to anyone still sticking around and reading these!

Also sorry I don't add more photos on the regular, I'm watching the show in pretty shitty resolution and on a player than is awful to screenshot from (-:

[oddeyes588]

So, Oshi no Ko's ending... (spoilers, obviously)

What a fucking mess. How did we get here? How did we get from starting with such a high peak of storytelling and drop all the way down to hell?

I'm going to preface this by saying... regardless of how awful the ending is, Oshi no Ko will always hold a place in my heart. Hell, one look at my screen name should let at least some people know that bad endings have never been able to rid me of whatever brainworms I've accumulated for a series, and it certainly won't start now.

(CW: SUICIDE MENTIONS)

A certain someone infecting me with Ai Hoshino brainworms is also part of why. For better or worse, my hyperfixation with Oshi no Ko is set to last for a long while yet, even after it's ending.

So where to start in talking about this ending... well, let's start with the biggest thing. This is single handedly the most mind-boggling, absurd ending I have ever read, for all of the worst reasons.

Oshi no Ko, as a whole, has never exactly been subtle about its messages. The cruelty of the idol industry, of the entertainment industry as a whole. The self-destructive nature of revenge. Finding reasons to live for yourself, finding your own happiness... happiness for oneself. It was heavy-handed with these messages, and it's important that it was. Aka Akasaka seemed like an author who would not shy away from writing these criticisms, who had their main messages down pat, even if at times things got... questionable.

(Just look at the side materials that we got for Oshi no Ko. Things like Viewpoint B. Everything, if nothing else, remained at least somewhat consistent to what the story was trying to convey).

And yet somehow, for reasons I cannot begin to understand... at the end of Oshi no Ko, Aka spat on every single message his work has ever had.

Aquamarine Hoshino, a traumatized boy who views his life as worthless, ready to give it up and sacrifice himself if it means succeeding in his revenge, who has said outright that that he intends to die after his revenge is over... is faced with a chance for a new beginning, a chance for love, given a chance to life a life of real, genuine happiness... faced with SO MANY people who love him and want him in their lives...! And he chooses to die anyways, taking his father with him to the ocean depths in a murder suicide, all so that his sister wouldn't have to live with the stigma of having a murderer for a brother. Something he does without hesitation, because everyone will move on from him eventually.

And Ruby... oh Ruby. Oh how they character assassinated you... faced with the crying face of her own mother in her reflection, she conveyed the truth... the truth that Ai was always just an ordinary girl, an ordinary girl who had her real self beaten down by the desires of people, turned into a perfect and pure commodity, all for the ugly desires of the people... who was then KILLED for failing to live up to those desires... what does Ruby do?

She choses to surpass her mother as an idol... because sure, Ai may not have been perfect, but she won't be like Ai! She'll be her own idol! An even better idol!

And so she does. She effectively becomes Ai 2.0. Ai without all of those complicated hidden feelings, Ai but she really is pure this time.

And in the wake of her brother's death... Ai but without any happiness of her own. Without any happiness outside of her singular, sole purpose. Having lost everything that she held dear, she now truly is the Perfect Idol, and nothing else. A monument of praise towards the Idol Industry.

...Everything this manga had been building up to. Building up to convincing Aqua that he deserves happiness... hell, Ai's one and only wish, for her babies to grow up healthy, for them to be happy. Building up to Ruby finding her own happiness, finding her own real reason to be an idol.

With an ending that Aka has confirmed is what he'd wanted the entire time... everything is flushed down the proverbial toilet, never to be seen again.

Aqua dies pointlessly and in a way that goes against every message we've ever had concerning living for yourself. Hikaru never had nearly enough screentime, let alone an arc, to justify being irredeemably evil and needing to be killed. Kana never gets to confess her feelings, Ruby's feelings go forever unaddressed, Akane serves fundamentally no purpose, Ai's wishes go almost completely unfulfilled, and Ruby becomes a shell of herself with being an idol now the only thing she has... and yet all of this is framed as a good ending.

The idea that this is in any way a good ending is... completely baffling to me. I cannot understand what is going through Aka Akasaka's head. Not only is this narratively the worst possible ending, but even the ending itself feels so hollow... rushed, as though none of it really meant anything, least of all Aqua's death. All but proving him right.

His death, his sacrifice, his suicide was worth it. Because despite how many people were hurt by his passing, in the end, they all moved on just like he expected.

(WHICH, LET ME JUST SAY, IS AN EXTREMELY POOR, RECKLESS, AND IRRESPONSIBLE MESSAGE TO BE WRITING ABOUT FUCKING SUICIDE. ESPECIALLY TO A COUNTRY LIKE JAPAN, WHERE SUICIDE RATES FOR YOUNG PEOPLE ARE PAINFULLY HIGH!! IT WAS ONLY WHAT, 20-SOMETHING CHAPTERS AGO WHERE YOU HAD THE LITERAL MANGAKAS IN THE STORY GO ON FOR A WHOLE CHAPTER ABOUT HOW THEIR WRITING HAS AN INFLUENCE ON PEOPLE'S LIVES, HOW THEY HAVE TO BE READY TO TAKE RESPONSIBILITY FOR WHAT THEY WRITE, AND YOU WROTE AN ENDING THAT GLORIFIES A CHARACTER'S SUICIDE!? SAYING THAT ITS OKAY HE DIED BECAUSE EVERYONE WAS STRONG AND EVENTUALLY GOT OVER IT!?? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME—)

Sighs...

Ultimately, in the end, this ending was an utter mess of an execution. Ideas that Aka was clearly too committed to, never once seeing how fucked it was, and never changing course.

And honestly? The fact that he wrote such good shit before this, wrote what I would even describe as masterpieces... only serves to make this ending hurt that much more.

[azaharinflames]

what if all of this is just part of the will they/won't they slow burn- plan, make us believe buck has moved on in ep7-8? have him being single and dating other people of screen for a few months, so when 8b starts we can see how much he still misses tommy?

not giving up hope yet(unless eddie comes out in ep 7-8 or something, that would be the end of bucktommy).

Inside me lives two wolves:

-They are setting up Buck finally deciding to fight, for once, and this is a misdirection. As in, Maddie and Chimney insist he has to move on and get back there, but Buck instead decides he wants to work on himself, see what Tommy meant, and then fight for him.

-They will end the episode with Buck packing his baking stuff up, and looking at life in a new light, ready to move on and take on the world or whatever.

Because, as much as I want to be an optimistic person, I am not, right now my bet is for the second option. I would love more than anything for the show to prove me incredibly wrong, but with how bizarre they've been writing this season...

It's like @seddair mentioned in the reblogs of my other posts - this is the show that had the famous quote 'you don't find it, son, you make it'. That was something that deeply impacted Buck, and something that for once should motivate him to make it. Yet the show somehow has forgotten this. Because why make our characters grow when they can go on endless cycles.

As for Buddie, without wanting to sound mean (please know it is never directed at you, anon):

No.

If there is one thing Ryan has made crystal clear lately, is that Eddie is straight. And his reasoning behind this is one I admire and I deeply respect. Could one argue he is bluffing to not reveal spoilers? Sure but it doesn't make sense. He's very clear in his intentions, and we know Tim won't force his actors to do something they truly don't want to do, so I honestly don't think he'd force Ryan to do Buddie if Ryan truly doesn't want to. Which, we are seeing, he doesn't.

[turnleftonlastlaughtlan]

SPOILERS ARCANE SEASON 2 ACT 2

ok, i am gonna admit it. Jayce did the right thing. Viktor had to die because the hexcore he was in contact with was cursed (as jayce’s says).

What bothers me tho is two things :

First i am still fucking mad at jayce. Do i understand him more? sure. but he did this. if not all he is the one that “saved” the real viktor by fusing him with hexcore, the very thing he sweared to vik to destroy. Viktor lived again, yes, but wasn’t himself for most of it, a puppet unaware of its strings. So so different form the quirky scientist or the determinated zaunite we knew. Jayce cursed Viktor by giving him “a new life” all for his foolishness and selfishness ( he couldn’t handle living a life without his lab partner). He is the perpetrator of what the remains of viktor has to suffer : dying again by the hand of a loved one ( one of the few or the very last remaining). Instead of saving Viktor, leaving him to die like the man he was, with the memory of WHO he really was, he condemned him to even more suffering than his fatal illness bought him.

i know he did it for the famous affection. i don’t care. Jinx didn’t want to kill her family but that doesn’t mean that she didn’t do it.

Second of all, as my favorite character dies again i am incredibly mad at how wonderfully they butchered him. The viktor of season one goes through changes, but he still remains him. The viktor i loved died in the bomb jinx threw at the council. From that point on is just a mere sketch of how he was. We only get a glimpse when he helps vander with “Sky”. His true sweet self. I cannot stress how it infuriates me that we DID NOT and CANNOT grive that man. Because he never really died hasn’t he? Not yet at least. I want closure, i want to be able to say that his story ended how it need to, not because his best friend decided that it was a good idea to fuse him to the thing he despised and then kill him off after he realized just how much he fucked up. Because yeah there wasn’t much of Vik left but is true self still saw Jayce hold the weapon made with the thing they created TOGETHER straight at his heart and shoot.

and he fucking didn’t deserved it. He didn’t want to be fucking jesus for god sake (or jesus sake suit yourself), he just wanted to help his people. His only mistake was experiment on HIMSELF using illegal drugs and without consulting jayce ( that we all know now would have understood). Him literally self harming himself to HOPE for a way out of his pain is his only mistake that resulted in the death of sky. Which was a fucking accident, other then that the man was doomed since birth without cause like a true zaunite. And hell did he paid enough for the death of sky.

i just know for a fact they are gonna revive him again and now that i have processed everything i am PRAYING they don’t. Because if they do it WILL NOT be Viktor, just and even more ugly and butchered imagine of what was is true self. Only to use him like an easy villan for the story.

let the man rest.

And if they do bring him back they better prepare a good ending or a proper goodbye for the true viktor.

[applebuttercringe]

Episode 5 immediate thoughts

Spoilers ahead!

-Oh hey it's the big guy who used to be on Caitlyns strike team.

-Get em Vi

-Jinx is betting on Vi's fights

-Average lesbian breakup experience

-Did she dye her hair black? Or did she just cry enough eyeliner onto herself that it turned it black?

-THE SISTER REUNION

-Vi is reminded by the shimmer tear that Jinx isn't fully in control of herself.

-Proud of Jinx though for being able to be in Vi presence without a breakdown

-Last time they saw each other Vi was fully ready to kill Jinx. Most brutal fight in the series. Now they can work together? Thats kinda rushed.

-Caitlyn using her detective skills again!

-"Peacekeeping operations" Yeah right Caitlyn.

-Caitlyn is full on racist

-Full on fascist

-The Caitlyn stans are gonna be fighting for their LIVES trying to defend her.

-This is the first time we've seen Mel not collected, or at least put together and considerate.

-ELORA!!!

-Mels brother?

-Mels brother!

-Well Vi got over basically all the Jinx stuff pretty quick.

-I mean this is basically what both of them really wanted, to be a family again, and it was achieved with very little ceremony.

-Did Jinx find out the mushroom aren't toxic by eating them? Does she eat every new thing she finds just to check?

-If Vi thinks this is Jinx lying why would she follow her?

-"BITCHMITTENS"

-Typical sibling behavior

-Vi is a child hitter confirmed. Considering Jinx's lingering trauma from Vi's reaction to the explosion in S1 Ep3, I'de think she would have a worse reaction to Vi hitting Isha.

-Whaarwhick is more savage than any beast in Noxus? Knowing Noxus from league I find that hard to believe.

-Wait, did Silco kill Vi and Jinx's parents? Is that why they split? I need to rewatch this frame by frame.

-Singed holding his daughter

-Singed real name is Dr. Reveck

-If Mel and Kino are surprised Ambessa has a love child, were they her hatechilds?

-Mel herself is a magical maguffin for the cult running a foreign nation. I thought she was just a super cool girlboss.

-Jinx is a jacket sniffer.

-Was Vander in love with their mom? I thought he was their adopted dad, has he been their bio dad the whole time?

-Vi defending Jinx 🥺

-Is that Singed daughter on the record Felicity is playing.

-Oh no young Silco is hot

-Felicity sounds like Jinx when she says "working up the nerve"

-That one tweet was right, Arcane music is horrifically literal.

-I don't care if it's rushed. This scene is straight out of a feel good fix it fic and I love it. Happiness and family for the Zaun sisters!

-Is this Salo after being healed by Viktor?

-Knew it

-Jayce, where ya been buddy?

-Viktor broke Jayce out so he could come see him. I mean it is probably not Viktor, it's the hexcore taking people over, but still.

-And once again the dynamic is reversed

-Just leaving Ekko and Heimerdinger in their huh?

-JAYCE STRAIGHT UP MURDERED HIM! HOLY SHIT! WHAT!?

-I THOUGHT HE WAS JUST GONNA BONK HIM TO KNOCK HIM OUT!

-WTF HAPPENED TO HIM!

Overall: Ok, so this felt rushed. The last 4 acts have been tearing these sisters apart, entirely centering on the traumas and outside forces that keep them from being a family. Then Jinx shows up and it takes one sentence to get Vi back, granted Vander being alive is big news, but Vi thinks Jinx is lying to her. Why wouldn't she be mad at Jinx?

Jayce straight up murderred a guy, I wish we got to see more of how he got to this point.

Caitlyn is still as much of a dictator as she has been all, but she does get consistently worse.

Mel is in a totally different story now.

Things are only looking up for Jinx and Vi.

Even with it being rushed I do like Jinx and Vis story here, I want happiness for them , sue me. But I don't see how they could possibly meaningfully redeem all the other characters in the 4 episodes left. Which means I think Arcane season 2 might not be peak anymore, entertaining? Yes. Interesting? Yes. Exciting? Yes. Peak? Maybe not. I still love it, but the cracks are showing.

[kyokutsu-sama]

"I'll meet you in another life, my love"

🤍🔸️🤍🔸️🤍🔸️🤍🔸️🤍🔸️🤍🔸️🤍🔸️🤍🔸️🤍🔸️🤍🔸️🤍

Sanemi x f!reader| angst/fluff

Plot- The scary and fearful wind hashira ends up meeting a new hashira (the reader) and from the first day he saw her, he fell in love with her and she with him. This love was so strong and so reciprocal that the memories still prevailed in the reincarnated souls.

A/n: I don't know where this idea came from but to be honest I think I ended up being inspired by the scene between Mitsuri and Obanai in the final fight and because of that my eyes are now dry from crying so much😭🥹 Don't worry I'll be writing something happier for him soon😅

Tw: There is a nsfw scene but not fully detailed, suggestive, mentions of violence and death, character death and some little manga spoilers.

🤍🔸️🤍🔸️🤍🔸️🤍🔸️🤍🔸️🤍🔸️🤍🔸️🤍🔸️🤍🔸️🤍🔸️

You were the newly arrived Hashira, the one your comrades were ready to welcome and the one that Master Ubuyashiki would also be happy to welcome and accept into the hashiras meeting.

You were a little nervous because that was your first day as a Hashira and you didn't know exactly how the others there would react. But apparently it was better than you expected.

"It is with great pleasure that I introduce you to the new Hashira who will be joining you from today onwards." The master spoke in his usual calm and formal voice."Y/n, please come and introduce yourself to the others."

You then crossed the wide porch of the house, bowing to the master and the others who were in the garden looking at you.

"My children, this is Y/n. I hope you can collaborate and work together so we can defeat the demons. It's always a pleasure to welcome another person to this place." He smiled at you and you smiled back

"Thank you, master. I am very proud to be here too." You bowed again

Each hashira carried an idea about you and everyone seemed to share good thoughts about you.

Shinobu-"She seems really pleasant. Maybe I can have a chance to talk to her later."

Rengoku-"Her posture is serious and her smile is very kind. It's a pleasure to welcome you, young Y/n."

Tengen-"A flashy and cheerful appearance. And she has nice hips by the way."

Tokito-"She's cool but I'll probably end up forgetting about her soon."

Gyomei-"She has a gentle voice and even without seeing her I can tell that we're going to get along well. I'm going to say a prayer for her."

Tomioka-"Humble and calm. I hope we get along well."

Mitsuri-"Another girl too? She's look so pretty and so cute. I want to be her friend!"

Obanai-"She also seems to be strong. She also has a confident air."

Of all the Hashiras' opinions, Sanemi was the one who didn't want to say a word. After all, he didn't have any. He was speechless.

He thought that feeling was just some idiocy on his part, but with time and the interaction between you two, he realized that it wasn't. And that same feeling only grew bigger and stronger when his eyes met yours by chance during meetings or when you called him to train.

You always approached him without fear, which also caught his attention since everyone was afraid of him. Your kind but very silly attitude, the jokes and provocations where he pretended to be angry with you when deep down he was loving it all.

There was even a day when Obanai caught him looking at you so much that he was even forgetting to blink, and his friend quickly realized what was happening and decided to tease him a little about the subject.

"Is she that pretty?"

"What?" Sanemi turned to him, "coming back to reality"

"You're completely focused on Y/n that you were almost drooling. You like her?" Obanai said, and Sanemi immediately changed his expression to his usual threatening one

"What are talking about? Don't bring Y/n up, and besides, stop seeing things that doesn't exist." Sanemi said, turning his back on his friend

"Oh really? Because I'm sure that you're feeling something for her."

"Oh shut up, why don't you go after Mitsuri? You like her too, don't you?"

"Don't bring her up either, Shinazugawa." Obanai's expression also changed when his beloved was mentioned in the conversation

And so things started like this. Obanai was the first to suspect and later Gyomei himself, who even without seeing, knew about all the tea between you and the wind hashira and he mentioned it to Mitsuri, who went to tell Shinobu and who later also told Tomioka and Rengoku, who also happened to tell his best friend, Tengen. And so everyone started to raise suspicions about a possible relationship between the two of you. But no one dared to confront you or Sanemi about it, limiting themselves to just waiting for something to prove it and then applauding the good news (which everyone already knew but didn't say).

That night, Sanemi decided to go to your house to "check on you." Everything seemed like a normal, casual encounter, but for a few months now, things have been getting tense between the wind hashira and you. Tense in the sense that both eyes were already speaking louder than mouths and the hearts were screaming louder than both minds.

Sanemi was a tough nut to crack. Who would have thought that he would be head over heels in love with you since the first day he saw you? He wanted to have you, he wanted your whole form and essence. Not just physically but to have your whole heart, to love you completely.

And there he was, going to your house knowing that now he would have you once again. Just as he had always wanted. And so had you.

You were getting out of the shower wrapped in a towel when you heard someone knock on the door. You went there with a smile on your face, already knowing who you would find on the other side. You opened the door to see the wind hashira right in front of you.

"Did I come at a bad time?" He looked at you up and down, holding your waist

"You could have at least let me get dressed." You smiled before kiss him, turning around and going to the bedroom to get dress

"You're talking as if I didn't already know what you look like under that towel." He entered the house and closed the door

You heard his words from the bedroom and couldn't help the immediate blush on your face and a certain shiver as you remembered the scenes that had happened inside that room. And in other corners of the house too...

"Where have you gone?" He asked, looking for you

"I'm in the bedroom, just give me five minutes and--" You stopped talking when the bedroom door closed and you realized that you were now both in the same room and that he was now right next to you

You looked up to meet his big eyes that looked scary when he was out of his mind. Of course he tried to make an effort not to seem so scary around you. He liked you and he didn't want to push you away, he wanted to keep you close. Forever.

"Are you going to stay there, cowered in shame?You always seemed so bold when we were alone. What's wrong, princess?" He bent down in front of you, grabbing your face with one hand, squeezing it lightly, and you held onto his wrist

"That's what I ask, my dear. Did you miss me, Shinazugawa?" You gave him a teasing smile

"I've been thinking about doing a lot of things with you since I saw you enter the meeting room, and believe me, you don't want to hear even half of it." He said, his eyes unable to focus on anything other than your eyes and lips

"Your mind is quite creative, I see." You pulled his hand away and brought your lips closer to his, almost touching. "Why don't you do it then? That's why you came here, right?"

Sanemi pulled you into his arms in a sudden movement and kissed you hard, leaving you breathless. Everything about him was breathtaking, by the way.

It didn't take long for his strong hands to rip the towel off your body and throw it aside while his lips devoured yours. Your trembling hands still managed to remove his haori and uniform together and throw them aside with the towel.

The need and hunger to be fed by that love and by his touch was growing inside your chest.

Both of you were now in each other's arms, his hands running over his favorite curves and yours running over the scars of someone who had been through a lot. Each one of them had a story and you knew each one of them.

When you touched them or kissed the scarred skin, he felt loved and this also led him to tell you a little about their origin. Most of them had been the result of his fights against demons. And even the more personal ones that had been left by his mother when she also became one of those creatures, he had told you.

He trusted to tell you everything because he loved you and this was a way for both of you to maintain intimacy. It wasn't just about the nights when you had more than just conversation, it was about the way everything that was done there was done with reciprocal and true feeling.

"Sanemi..." You moan in his ear, arms hugging his body closer and grabbing his hair as his strong hands gripped your hips as you rode him faster

"You really miss me too, don't you? My hands running you, the way I fill you...All of that?" He asked with his hungry lips kissing down your neck and shoulder

"Yeah... I did." You whimpered, pulling his head away from your neck to find his lips again and kiss him roughly

He was not a man of words but of actions and if he had to say that he loved you through actions, he would probably hold you in his arms until he died. He would never abandon you, never run away from you. He would always protect you from the dangers of that world full of nocturnal and deadly enemies. He would train whatever it took to become strong and to keep you safe.

He was rough, stubborn and complicated but his heart was good and he never lied when it came to feelings. He was very honest and direct. Even though he was embarrassed to say many things because he had shyness in his heart that was hidden by his rough and tough personality.

He wasn't ashamed to tell you he loved you, or to grab you by the waist in the hallway of the mansion and take you to your room to take a "short break" from training.

The times when you would sneak out during the day and no one would know your whereabouts, the times when he would look at you suggestively during meetings. Or sometimes when of his hands "accidentally" slip under your skirt when no one was looking and you would blush and hold his hand so he wouldn't do anything stupid in the middle of the meeting. But of course that was only when you weren't in the presence of the master, then he would just exchange looks. Looks where your love was written and your souls met.

But deep down you knew, you knew that playing that game was a risk. A love story like yours could not be lived in that world, not when both of you could die on any mission you were subjected to. There was hope but there was also fear.

You rested your head against his chest as you caught your breath, his fingers tracing imaginary paths on your back, caressing the sweaty skin. He kissed the top of your head and rested his chin there for a moment.

He wanted it to be like this forever and you would also undoubtedly choose him over and over again without thinking. His strong arms were your shield, the place you went to feel safe and warm.

"Nemi?" You called in a low voice

"What?" His eyes went down to where you were

"Don't you want to lie down for a bit?"

"Yes."

The wind hashira lay down on the futon with you on top of him, hugging you tightly. The fingers of one of his hands played with your hair as you looked into his eyes holding one of his hands, caressing it. It was that touch he needed to feel, the gentleness that contrasted with his nature.

"Are you going to keep looking at me like that because you think I'm pretty or is this your way of inviting me to the second round?" He teased and you laughed softly, leaving a kiss on his lips

"You really are an idiot, aren't you, Nemi? No, I was just admiring you, is there a problem with that?"

"None."

"Good." You smiled, kissing him

The long make-out sessions always made him even more eager to have you. He was slowly going crazy with the sweet and soft texture of your lips.

You, on the other hand, had a something to ask him for a few days but hadn't had the chance to do it yet, and before he put you on the futon and got ready for the second round, you reluctantly pulled away from his lips and decided to ask him.

"Can I ask you something?" You whispered

"You're really annoying, you know that, brat?"

"Aren't you going to call me princess now?" You smiled, patting his chest

"Not if you don't shut up."

"Please Nemi, I really need to ask you this."

"Are you going to ask me if I wanna go again? Let's do it then, dear."He raised his eyebrow and you rolled your eyes

"No, it's not about that."

"What is it then ?"

"Nemi, what would be the first thing you would do after we defeat Muzan?" You asked, looking into his eyes, which seemed to have changed expression at that moment

He wanted to answer a lot of things, one of them was to ask you to marry him, run away from there, live with you forever in any place, have children and make you the happiest woman in the world.

He wanted to say so much, but the words wouldn't come out, he couldn't. He was afraid that none of it would come true.

Being a Hashira wasn't for everyone and the worst thing that could happen was to love someone, to get attached to someone, but love is a feeling that no one can control and that's a fact.

Sanemi couldn't help but fall in love with you, he couldn't help but look at you when you when you passed by him and he saw how beautiful you were getting every day, how much he wanted to run away with you. He couldn't help the intensity of his emotions. And as much as you wanted to have him too, to have a future with him, the fear of losing him was always there. Fear of being alone if he died in the battle against Muzan or the upper moons. You would probably never have a day of rest again and you would probably never fall in love again in your life like you fall in love with him.

You also wanted to know more about his feelings towards you, even though he was evasive about the subject.

You had been dating for months but sometimes it seemed like there was still so much to discover about each other. You wanted to know everything about him, you didn't want to lose him without knowing every single thing about him.

"So? You're not going to answer me?" You combed the white strands of hair that were still stuck to his forehead because of the sweat

"I..." Sanemi got a little confused between his words and his thoughts. "I'd probably dance on that idiot's grave, does that sound good to you?"

His joke definitely served to break the tension and get a laugh out of you. He then smiled, seeing you laugh like that but felt bad for having run away from his heart once again.

"Did you really just say that?" You said, still laughing. "You're unbelievable, Sanemi."

"What? Are you going to tell me that you don't want to get together too, after everything he's done? And keeps doing?"

"Well, he destroyed thousands of lives and is still causing a lot of problems, so yeah. I would join you in this dance."

"What about you?" He ran a hand over your face, looking into your eyes. "What would be the first thing you would do after we defeat that son of a bitch?" You felt your heart race when he asked you the same question

The urge to tell him...

The urge to tell him that you wanted him as your husband and as your man until you die.

But the fear was there once again, preventing your feelings from coming out.

"I honestly don't know. I have so many things on my mind that I can't decide."

"Besides being an idiot and annoying, you're also indecisive. What a great wife I got." Sanemi felt his heart race with anxiety after realizing what he had said just now

"Wait a minute, what did you say?" You paused for a moment, processing to see if you had heard correctly

"What?"

"Just now, what did you say? A great what?"

"I didn't say anything." He looked away, trying to change the subject even though he was already burning with blush

"Yes, you did. I heard. Come on, what did you said?"You slapped his chest, insisting

"I said a great girlfriend." He lied

"That's not what I heard."

"Go to sleep." He said, adjusting himself and closing his eyes, and you looked at him, waiting for him to repeat it

"Nemi... Say it again, please." You shook his body, but he was determined to stay silent. "Look, I'm going to sleep in the living room, you hear?And you're going to sleep alone tonight." You threatened, trying to get off of him, but his arm pulled you close and kept you quiet

"Listen here! Just shut up and go to sleep or I'll shut you up some other way, understand?" He put his hand on your lips, and you rolled your eyes, taking off his hand

"What a beautiful husband I got." You murmured, laying on his chest

"What did you say?" He lifted your face looking at you

"Nothing, go to sleep." You repeated his words, and he let out a sigh

You were mad at him for not repeating those words, but deep down you knew that it wasn't by chance, it was his feelings speaking louder and he couldn't control them. You felt a wave of emotions, but deep down you cried with joy, knowing that he also wanted to live the same life. That both of them walked side by side with the same love even if the ways of showing it were different.

*One day before the Hashiras entered the Infinite Castle*

"Sanemi, where are you?" You called out to him in the middle of the tall trees in that forest. "Nemi!" You shouted and suddenly the wind blew stronger, indicating that he was closer.

You then continued walking until you reached a large weeping tree near a river that crossed the forest. There was also a small bridge that led to the other side where there was a ruined gazebo next the large tree.

You crossed the bridge and found your boyfriend sitting on the stones of the small wall of the gazebo and looking at you as you approached. You climbed the small stairs and then he stood up to face you and you smiled at him.

He approached you and pulled you by the waist to kiss you hard as usual. You wrapped your arms around his neck and gave in to that passion. It was just the two of you there.

Crazy in love and far from the world out there...

"Where have you been? I've been calling for you this whole time and I haven't gotten an answer." You said, pulling away from his lips for a moment

"You're too annoying that's why I didn't answer." He bit out before kissing you again, silencing any answer you were going to give

"Nemi." You called him in the middle of the kiss and he pulled away, biting your lower lip

"What?"

"How did you find this place? It's so beautiful."

"I didn't think I'd find this, but I kept walking and I ended up here by chance." He said, looking around."It's a really nice spot."

"It's quiet and very pleasant. I'd give anything to live in a place like this." You hugged him and he hugged you back. "If we make it out of this battlefield alive, I'll definitely live in a place like this. A modest home and a happy marriage..."

Sanemi looked at you and thought about everything you had said. He would definitely give you all of that. The house, the wedding, everything.

"Everything..."

"My dear wife and also, the mother of my children."He thought." My everything."

*Moments after Muzan was killed*

Sanemi was so exhausted and injured that he almost died at that moment. But as soon as he looked around and didn't see you, the anxiety and the need to look for you increased.

"Where is she? Where is Y/n?" He asked himself as he ran in circles, looking for you.

"Y/N!!!" He shouted trying to find your whereabouts

He then found your body, lying on the floor, covered in blood. Deep punctures, open cuts and scratches, tearful eyes, sobs, moans of pain and sadness. You didn't want that to be the end, not without at least seeing Sanemi one last time.

"Y/n!!" He ran to you, kneeling down and taking you in his arms, hugging you and crying like you had never seen him cry before

The crying of a desperate and passionate man. He didn't even have words to describe what he was feeling at that moment he saw you there on the floor, on the verge of death.

"Nemi! You came!" You smiled almost weakly and he pulled you away for a moment to look into your eyes

"Of course I would come, my love. I will always come for you." He spoke nervosly, with words you never thought you would hear. "I'm going to call the paramedics." "No, you don't have to, Sanemi." You grabbed the collar of his uniform and he looked at you. "I've already lost a lot of blood and I can't barely feel my body. I'll just...l'll just use my last bit of strength to tell you something and you'll have to listen to me. Please, just you and me." You begged, feeling the tears running down your face

He felt tied hand and foot, knowing that this was where everything would end and that he couldn't do anything.

"Sanemi, from the first day I saw you, I fell in love. I fell in love even though I knew that this life wouldn't give us a chance to be happy, I never wanted to give up on you I tried hard and fought for your love even though I knew that this could happen. I'm so grateful to have a man like you in my life. You loved me like no other man could love a woman. I love you so, so much." You said whimpering and sobbing and he cried along with you in his arms

"I love you so much too I just wanted to see you happy and protect you. You know, that night I really meant it, I really called you wife that time because I love you and I want you forever, I want to be your man, your husband and make you happy. I want to take you to a calm place like you told me before and live with you. I want you to live, so please..." He took one of your hands and squeezed it, sobbing."don't close your eyes. Don't do this to me."

"So... You really wanted me as your wife... That's good to know." You smiled, bringing your hand to his face to meet his eyes."Your wounds will open if you push yourself too hard." You warned him, watching his blood run down his abdomen

"No, don't worry about me, my dear, it doesn't hurt, it's nothing."He comforted you by hugging you and kissing you several times on your forehead and head."Your husband is strong."

"I know...That's why I love you" You said proudly

Sanemi felt his heart tighten with anxiety more and more when he saw his hands completely covered in your blood due to the deep wounds. No one there could heal you from those wounds, too much blood had already been spilled, many of your bones had been broken, your uniform was torn, covered in blood and dust.

Sanemi looked at you and saw that that image contrasted completely with the beautiful girl with a bright smile he saw on the first day, next to the master. He blamed himself so much for not being able to protect you and now having to watch you die slowly in his arms.

"Love?"

"What?" He looked at you

"Can I ask you one last thing?" You murmured, feeling your last strength

"You can ask me whatever you want, but it won't be the last. You'll live much longer." He said optimistically, with a little hope in his heart

"Nemi...Kiss me one more time. With all your heart." You said, slowly approaching his face, and he nodded

He held your face and kissed you deeply. The tears on your faces mingled, both hearts beating fast, and the eyes closed, which were the windows of the soulmates there, hugging each other.

His lips always carried passion and roughness when he kissed you, but on your deathbed, everything seemed more gentle and pure.

When you pulled away, you caressed his cheeks and sniffed, opening your eyes to find those that did not leave your face for a moment.

"If I reincarnate and meet you in a next life, I will be your wife and I'll carry your children." You promised, holding his hand

"And I promise that I will come to you wherever you are. I will find you in the next life, my love. I will make you mine again, no matter how long it takes to find you." He promised, kissing you once more because he would never get tired of kissing you

You stayed in his lap, your arms hugging him and he hugged your body tightly. All those pain you felt earlier now seemed to be falling asleep after the heat of his body surrounded you.

He cried and cried the whole time he was there with you. That would be the last moment by your side and you yourself admitted that you did not want anyone else there so that you could stay in a quiet place with him. No one could interrupt you two there.

The wind hashira was also feeling weak at that moment, even though he didn't care, the open wounds and bleeding were taking away his strength.

Knowing that he would still have a few more years without you by his side would be painful. His mark would be his death at 25 and he was still 21. he would still have four painful years without you. He wouldn't face his own death in a sad way but rather happy, knowing that he would have to meet you. Looking for his princess in another life.

"Are you still there, princess?"He called out to you

"Forever..."An almost inaudible whisper left your lips to say your last words

"You're going home with me now, okay? I'll take you home safely and you'll live." The tears wouldn't stop flowing as he pretended that everything would be fine again

He put his hand on your chest and felt your stop completely. The wind hashira shook his head in denial, not accepting the death of his beloved.

"No...No...NO." He screamed in frustration and suffering."NOT YOU, PLEASE!!! I've already lost my family, I can't lose you too."Sanemi cried in despair, begging and sobbing

It didn't take long for the kakushis to arrive and come across the scene of him with your dead body in his arms.

Everyone there didn't dare get close to him, some even cried because they also knew you and mourned your death. Sanemi felt his heart being torn into pieces. There was no one left. He had put so much faith that today he would get back together with you to finally asked you in marriage.

The truth is that he ended up doing it, but it wasn't the way he had thought. In his dreams, you lived together. His hand caressed your hair and went down your face, closing the eyelids of your still open eyes.

When one of the members of the Demon Slayer Corps finally decided to get close to separate both of you, he immediately grabbed his wrist and pushed him back.

"Don't touch her." Sanemi threatened and the other immediately moved away. "I'm the one who will take her back. Don't you dare get close to her." Sanemi then stood up with you in his arms

*4 years later*

He remembers the place where you were together for the last time. He decided to bury you in the ground of the weeping tree. He knew you loved that place and so he decided to let your soul rest there after that fateful day. A calm and peaceful place. The same place you wanted to live after that mission was over. He never left you alone, he always visited you every day, he brought you fresh flowers when the others were drying, he brought you incense and he even ate all his meals there so he could be with you.

Sanemi was turning 25. That would be his last day alive and he decided to sit one last time in front of your tent, crying as he looked at the stone

"Today is the day. I'll be looking for you, my brat." He smiled even as he felt the tears flow. "I'll look for you and my brothers. We'll be a family again. There will be no more demons to separate us. And..." He took a small box from his pocket and opened it, revealing the silver ring. "We're going to get married. I was supposed to give it to you on our last night but I didn't have the courage."

He left the ring next to the flowers and lay down on the ground, slowly closing his eyes and feeling his body slowly die. His life ended there, by your side.

*Current life*

You were leaving home that day to go for a walk since it was your day off and you wanted to have some fun. You got ready and left the house.

There was a large garden in front of your house, with a large weeping willow tree in the middle that was really beautiful and many people liked to spend time there. You also liked to spend your time there, reading some book or just to get some air.

You entered the garden but were so distracted that you ended up bumping into another man who was coming from the opposite direction. He ended up grabbing you on impulse so you wouldn't fall to the ground and you clung to him, almost hugging each other.

You looked at him in the eyes and he looked at you, a strange feeling ran through your body. It was as if you had seen him somewhere else.

In another life...

A hazy memory of having kissed a man just like him appeared in your head, but when he spoke to you, you quickly came back to reality, leaving these memories aside.

"Hey! Are you okay?" He asked, looking at you, who was still a little shaken

"Yeah, yeah, I'm fine." You said, slowly moving away from him

"You seem a little scared, are you really sure?"

"Yes, thank you for holding me and for worrying." You smiled. "What's your name by the way?" You asked

"Sanemi, and you?"

Another memory appeared in your head of being in the arms of a man where he said,

"I'll meet you in the next life, my love."

"What's happening to me? What are these memories?" You thought, increasingly confused

"Nice to meet you! My name is Y/n." You extended your hand and he shook it

At that moment, the man had a memory where he was hugging a woman just like you and where she said, "If I reincarnate and meet you in the next life, I'll be your wife and I'll carry your children."

Both you and he froze for a split second that seemed like it would never end. A connection so strong that it had once been cut off by an unfair outcome.

But here you two were, meeting as you both had promised in past, although now you could only remember the past as vague memories and strange sensations that you never imagined you would feel.

"Be careful not to bump into anyone else out there." He said and you gave an embarrassed smile

"I'll pay more attention next time. Have a good day." You bowed slightly and left

He looked at you as you walked away, his expression one of confusion and curiosity at the same time.

"Who is that brat? I feel like I've seen her before but I can't remember where." He then went back on the path, still with that idea mulling over in his head

[lancermylove]

Fallen for You

Fandom: Obey Me

Pairing: Simeon x gn!Reader

Warning: Mild angst, spoilers from OG chapter 76

Requested by: Anon

Prompt: May I request an angst fic (hurt/comfort) simeon x reader (romantic relationship) who feel guilty about him falling and becoming a human? Like kinda stares at him for long time sadly and spacing out alot and crying sometimes and how would he react?

Word Count: 1,032

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The most angelic being you knew was now a human, and it was your fault.

Why did he have to take the Ring of Light without permission? He once promised to protect you no matter what, but you hadn't expected him to take it this far. You stared at him from across the room, and though his soft blue eyes were unburdened in a way they hadn't been before, your heart still ached. Those same eyes once shone with the divine light of the Celestial Realm, but it was gone because of you. You rapidly blinked, holding back the tears that threatened to fall.

"It isn't your fault, (y/n). Simeon chose to help you out of his own volition." Lucifer's voice held a rare softness as his large hand patted your head. "He truly loves you, and what you consider a burden to him is far from it. Speak to him, and you shall learn the truth."

Lucifer convinced you to speak to Simeon to learn the truth, but when the ex-angel turned his head and gently smiled at you, another wave of guilt crashed over your thoughts. He looked so...so content, but why? How could he not resent you after what happened?

"You're awfully quiet today," Simeon said, his voice cutting through the d drawn silence. "Are you feeling alright?"

You bit your lips as your throat tightened, preventing words from coming out. You looked down at your trembling hands but quickly hid them behind your back to prevent Simeon from seeing them. But your boyfriend walked closer, reached behind your back, and held your hands in large, warm ones. His loving touch only made your tears spill over.

"(Y/n)," Simeon whispered, his brows furrowing in concern. "What's wrong?"

"What's wrong?" You repeated, your voice cracking. "You're asking me that?" You choked on a sob and turned your head away to avoid meeting his gaze. "You lost everything because of me. Your powers, your title, your home...all of it. And for what? I wasn't worth—"

"Stop," Simeon firmly said. "Don't finish that sentence."

The firmness in his voice and the fire in his eyes made you flinch, as Simeon had never used this tone with you before.

➣ For the rest, visit: Fallen for You

———————————————

➣ All Masterlists

➣ OM Masterlist: [Genre][By Characters]

➣ Tumblr Only ML: Obey Me

[waterfallofspace]

another non snz post I apologize but uh- just finished reading through the first 151 chapters of J/ujutsu K/aisen... (took me 6 hours of straight reading xD) and I am feeling supremely unwell about these characters/this story. I will be finishing the rest tomorrow once my 100 chapter limit resets. I won't ramble on but just wanted to say that um? I am feeling so many feelings about this! I am even more excited for season 2!! Didn't think that was possible!! And yes anyways just being so unchill about S/atoS/ugu over here <3333

[wanderingibon]

if you thought i'd introduce my rooksona with something epic and cool with immense lore... here's lucanis with cookie rook instead. i hope it captures the energy, and more

[jackklinemybeloved]

zac’s “less is more” approach to comedy is always golden but it is working PERFECTLY for colin provolone from both a comedic and dramatic standpoint. everyone else I kinda get the vibe of but colin is Just Some Guy which is driving both me and raphaniel up the fucking WALL.