#i like the idea of being perceived as androgynous

[let-them-sing-of-others]

eyeing cassgender very heavily. hmmm. i like that label

[lesbiansanemi]

Google how to make peace with the fact that you will always be vaguely to extremely uncomfortable (depending on the day) with your body and how others perceive it until the day you die and nothing you do will ever change that

[aparticularbandit]

Also someone definitely referred to me as he earlier and just. That was so nice. SO nice.

[friendlifyre]

looking for that one reblog where someone said something like... 'when i think of having sex i picture myself with a dick'.

i cant even remember if it was in response to a post abt trans ppls sexualities or abt why bottom surgery can matter or abt why the 'youre a [gender] bc you say so not bc you have [x] body parts !!!1!!' positivity can be alienating to some ppl...

maybe a mix of all or none at all but i wanna find it again so badly bc that sentence exists rent free in my brain like i have Never experienced such a feeling of simultaneous Being Understood + You Put It In Words as I did when i read that sentence

[theeretblr]

This is probably a frequently asked question, but here we go! I’m a guy who wants to try dressing more androgynously (and who also probably isn’t gender cis lol), what’s your advice on breaking that gender barrier for the first time?

This is one of the best questions I have ever received!

I'm so passionate about this! There are so many different ways someone could experiment with AMAB gender for the first time.

Simple ways to "break the gender barrier" could be: - Asking a friend(s) to use a different name or pronouns - Growing your hair out or getting it styled more "femme" - Experimenting with make up > Most days I just clean shave and use concealer and powder to cover up any blemishes or facial hair darkness. I'm only recently learning more about makeup stuff myself, but it works! - Trying on more "feminine" clothes (e.g. bras, v-neck shirts, skirts) - Wearing shape wear (e.g. hip pads, breast forms) > I wear breast forms slotted into a regular bra most days. I can share what I use most of the time if anyone is interested. > Breast forms have the benefit of being removable and come in different sizes. > I've seen breast forms as cheap as $22, but the ones I like most are usually around $60-$70. > From an outside perspective, breast forms are almost always perceived as real in my experience > If you are wanting to try out breast forms, I would recommend starting relatively small (around A-C cup size) and then go bigger if you want. I have found it is much easier to style around having smaller breast forms, especially more casually. > Larger breast forms will need a more supportive bra, especially as they aren't glued to your chest (though those do exist) > When presenting Fem, I am generally wearing some hip and butt pads, these help balance out my silhouette with my breast forms to be more feminine overall. (Again, I can link if interested)

I hope this helps! Those are just some ideas and advice from someone who has been working a lot of this out themselves. I'm sure many people have had different experiences, but these are things that I know have worked for myself and friends. Please let me know if you guys can think of any more! Thank you!

[xxlovelynovaxx]

Okay, this is not without a point, but (screenshot):

(A post and reblog which read: Nonbinary legit means outside established gender ideas yet you racist, transmisogynist, otherwise bioessentialist assholes keep bothering amab nb people because you think theyre too masc or whatever to be nb. Hey newsflash not all nb people are androgynous-femme white stick thin transmascs with undercuts - and - We're never making it out cisheteropatriarchy without you analyzing your beliefs on who is trans or nb enough)

If you think "transmasc" is the default nonbinary person or even considered to be the default nonbinary person, perhaps you haven't unlearned your bioessentialism either. And like, sure, maybe they don't think that way and meant "afab nonbinary person" by "transmasc nonbinary person", which is itself bioessentialist as those aren't equivalent in either direction (there's plenty of amab transmasc and afab non-transmasc nonbinary people), but the specific issue they're talking about (being perceived as too masc to be nonbinary) actually very specifically prominently affects transmascs as well.

It's almost as if your sex OR gender OR presentation being perceived as too masc can cause this, and also that trans people's AGAB (especially transitioning and intersex trans' peoples AGAB) can be misread by other trans people. Like do you think that all AMAB nonbinary people face this forever, or could this perhaps have a whole lot to do with passing as binary and AMAB people who transition and pass as cis women might in fact face this less than AFAB people who transition and pass as cis men? Never mind that this affects people who are androgenous in an additive way (tits and a beard, as an example) rather than a subtractive way (neither masc nor femme characteristics).

I'd also wonder about how they seem to be conflating "nonbinary" with "nontransitioning" in the way they describe the theoretical standard "femme androgenous transmasc" nonbinary person and think that AMAB nonbinary experiences are somehow universal.

Like, newsflash, anyone who appears masc enough gets hit with the essentialist (bio AND gender) antimasculinity that is such a problem in the queer community. Anyone who appears femme enough typically doesn't, though there are always exceptions. This includes presentation, perceived sex, and perceived gender. Butch trans people in general also face this regardless of gender.

Also this is bothering me especially so. AFAB≠transmasc. AMAB≠transfem. AFAB transfems and AMAB transmascs exist. Nonbinary people who aren't transfem OR transmasc, or who are both, exist. Transmasc/transfem as a new binary just excludes the majority of nonbinary people, because not all nonbinary people are "masc" or "femme" and in fact that's kinda the whole point of nonbinary as a gender category, not JUST that most nonbinary people aren't "men" (only*) or "women" (only*)

*because multigender people who experience binary genders are also just as nonbinary as any other nonbinary person

But (screenshot):

(A comment marked as by the original poster which reads: Transandrophobia believers don't rb this btw. heart emoji I'm late but whatever)

Ah, right, you haven't unlearned your bioessentialism. You seem to think only AMAB nonbinary people face exorsexism, or perhaps you don't even understand that exorsexism is a specific type of transphobia to nonbinary people and think AFAB nonbinary people "only" face transphobia. And I shudder to imagine your opinions on intersex trans people in general.

"Transandrophobia believers" like sorry not sorry I actually believe that transmascs face specific targeted transphobia and that transfems aren't the most oppressed, and also that all trans people can experience any type of specific transphobia and that bigots who famously don't respect trans people's internal identity and infamously can't "always tell" don't choose to be bigoted based on either your ontological identity or your physical sex. It's almost like I base my understanding of oppression on actual material experience and not just what I want to be true so I can pretend I'm punching up at vulnerable people in my community

Also wtf (screenshot):

(A comment marked as by the original poster which reads: Proshippers also don't rb i fucking hate you all)

Like not surprised this person has dogshit views lacking any critical analysis whatsoever but honey sweetie baby pie this is just sad

Anyway take your own advice and analyze your own beliefs on who is trans or nonbinary enough and also unlearn your own bioessentialism because simply saying "only AMAB trans people face more than basic transphobia and are the most oppressed" is bog standard gender essentialism and bioessentialism, and in fact treating all AMAB trans people as transfem or transfem adjacent is WILDLY exorsexist and misgendering a WHOLE lot of nonbinary people

[butch-reidentified]

do you think it’s possible for a lesbian to be somewhat attracted to a trans woman (who passes well) if the only place she sees the tw is online/in videos/in pictures? i’m gender critical and i believe attraction is based on sex, but if somebody strongly resembles the same sex and you’re only seeing them from a physical distance, wouldn’t it make sense for somebody attracted to that sex to be able to find them attractive? (not referring to pursuing a relationship with them)

its almost 4am at the end of a long work week, and I'm still recovering from covid, so I hope this is coherent lmao

ik this will be controversial but I urge people to really mull over this before reacting in anger, though I really do understand the impulse:

honestly, as a (former) neuroscience researcher and someone still deeply passionate about neuroscience who likes to read neuroscience journal articles in her spare time... I think it's fucking complicated and there's a bit of intellectual dishonesty on both sides. the TRA side claims you can (only!) be attracted to someone's internal identity or ~gender feelings~ while the gc side claims that there is NO circumstance in which a person could pass well enough as the opposite sex to be perceived as attractive by someone whose orientation includes that "passing" sex.

and yet, I've had the experience of being at an lgbt bar or club and seeing someone I thought was a cute masc woman initially, only to realize it was an androgynous or slightly effeminate-appearing gay man - and many many lesbians I've told this to have shared similar experiences with me. I know a male transitioner online who is really cool and calls himself a eunuch rather than a woman or anything, and while I don't find him attractive, I have to admit that in the ~100ish photos I've seen of him (incl many candid full body ones taken by other people), I've not been able to "clock" any distinct male characteristics. maybe that would be different in person, but we live on totally different continents so idk.

I've known a TON of trans people irl, likely far more than most people on radblr or anywhere. this is partly because Florida has the second highest # of trans people in the country, and partly bc of where I went to college, and partly because my life is just strange like that. but I'll admit I've known a couple mt"f"-transitioned folks who I truly had no idea were male for quite some time - physically or behaviorally.

the reality is that your brain only knows what it perceives, and if it perceives a male as a female without your knowledge, and your orientation includes females, then it could be possible to feel attraction. however, I'm preeetty damn sure that would not persist beyond learning that person's sex is male, at which point you'd probably suddenly start noticing whatever male traits you were able to overlook initially. but I don't think it makes rational sense to claim that it's never possible to experience "mistaken" attraction for a period of time. there are known cases of historical women who lived as men who were flirted with by straight women who believed them to be male, for instance.

this is one of those situations where the truth (what I've said above) could be twisted and deliberately misinterpreted by the opposing party, which I believe to be why so few, if any, are willing to acknowledge this. but it's a question I've pondered a lot and this is the only logical conclusion I've reached. and it simply is not rational for anyone to act like anything I've said here implies that homosexuals can/should be open to dating/sleeping with the opposite sex. anyone who could come to that conclusion from this response needs a seriously intensive review of reading comprehension.

like I said I'm not fully awake so I'm sure I could have made my points here more clearly and I'm sure I'll get retaliation from people who want to nitpick my wording or whatever, like usual, but o well.

[homunculus-argument]

In the Earliest Draft Fantasy Book I meant to write in the standard fantasy races with my own twist on them, though eventually I realised that the humans’ story was interesting enough on its own to not try to shoehorn whole different species and their own cultures into it. But one of the features it had was that only humans are actually sexually dimorphic. Elves are all androgynously slender, and though they’re beautiful, their beauty is uncanny and eerie - to human eyes, they almost resemble remarkably tall children. They’re not actually immortal, but simply retain many features that humans consider youthful and childlike into adulthood. Their lifespan is actually only slightly longer than that of modern humans, living into their 90s and sometimes past 100, but from the perspective of humans who make it to 70 if they’re lucky, an elvish lifespan is literally generations.

 I didn’t go much into dwarves, but their physical gender distinctions are very subtle, and there are vast cultural differences among dwarven people about how individuals express it. The details of gendered clothing are also too subtle for an untrained human eye to pick out - such as the shapes and designs of belt buckles, braiding of beards and angles of the cut of one’s boots - and in certain dwarven cultures, the idea does not exist at all. Their languages or dialects have no gendered pronouns, and asking an individual which role they play in reproduction is considered an extremely rude and invasive question.

Orcs do not have a concept of paternity, they have mating seasons during which young and childless orcs feel the urge to go wander into distant lands and the fact that they happen to meet other orcs of different clans and mate is considered an unimportant part of this rite of passage. Orc clans are matrilinear to whatever extent they care about bloodlines at all, and the fact that most clans tend to be matriarchal isn’t due to any idea that female orcs would somehow be better leaders - the females are simply slightly physically larger, and statistically more likely to gain the upper hand in the “who’s-calling-the-shots-around-here” brawls that establish who leads the clan.

The only detail in which this ever became relevant in the actual book draft was how they perceive the human habit of constantly being at war and seeking to expand their territory - the people of the other races can’t really tell human men and women apart very well, either, and come to the conclusion that every adult human woman that they see (having visible breasts) must be currently nursing. Of course they are constantly harking after new land to farm, if they're constantly reproducing.

[the-s1lly-corner]

hey, may i request hcs of laughing jack + slenderman x nonbinary, afab!reader who gets misgendered/bullied a lot but is too scared to correct/stand up to ppl? happens to me a lot :[

laughing jack and slenderman x afab!nonbinary!reader

im so so sorry you keep getting treated like dookie- as a fellow afab nb i totally get your pain with the misgendering, people just need to hush up

notes: reader is afab and nonbinary, established relationships, both canon characters have limited knowledge of lgbt topics but thats mostly because they hardly interact with people or media

cws: transphobia, canon typical violence, mentions of stalking

laughing jack

doesnt get to interact with many people much, so hes a little limited on his knowledge- and given that he originally started existing in the Victorian era? hoo boy- hes not transphobic or otherwise lgbtphobic but there is some ignorance

can see himself as using some labels once he gets more educated on it, though! always headcanoned laughing jack to be gnc!

tries to help you appear more androgynous or masculine if thats what you want! he doesnt mind playing dress up with you, and hes definitely going to take it as a moment to turn it into a game and try to cheer you up!

openly mocks the people who bully you, as well as outright saying that theyre just a bunch of jerks who... dont deserve nice things to head their way.. to keep the description vague

similar to slenderman, hes going to go out and get some vengeance if things get ugly enough

he doesnt like going out without you, hes a bit clingy.. but the sight of you being so distraught really makes his insides coil like snakes.. does not like it at all

even tries to push for you to carry him around in his box so he can just jump and slash anyone who says anything- though thats not a very good idea... would give him away quickly

slenderman

he doesnt understand much about gender, and honestly? i can easily see him being agender, or maybe gender apathetic simply due to him not showing interest in his own identity. he rarely wants to be perceived anyway

despite not knowing much about it and not caring how others see him, he can understand just a little bit on why it matters to you- especially when youre seen as something youre not and harassed for it

rest assured that if he ever finds out someone is harassing you, he will silent them quickly. out right offing them or stalking them over a period of time, the result will end in you having one less person on your back... then two.. then three.. and so on

actually the fact that people seem to either go missing or skip town not long after messing with you makes many keep their mouths shut- and before you even think that might prompt someone to harm you under the guise that its YOU doing it, slenderman isnt going to let that happen

he listens to you if you need to talk about your feelings on it, hes unsure of how to verbally help you affirm your gender identity but if you outright ask him how he views you; he tells you that you pass in his eyes regardless of if you present more femininely, masculine, or androgynously.. though that may be because of his aforementioned limited knowledge on the topic... hes supportive nonetheless!

[thebutchtheory]

on a note related to my last post talking about theory vs. the real life experiences of trans people, i disagree with the idea that talking about my experiences as a transmasc butch, my experiences with transphobia, anti-GNC rhetoric and misogyny, and how i am perceived by society as a woman who is not "womaning" the way society wants me to means that i am masculinizing transfems or feminizing myself to make myself look like a victim.

i agree that concepts of male and female socialization are bullshit and meaningless, and that transfems by and large do not have male privilege of any kind. at best they're seen as women, at worst they're seen as deranged predatory men to abuse and take privilege away from, and are degendered and dehumanized in every other context such that transfems as a class do not have any meaningful amounts of male privilege. any true male privilege a transfem has is erased the second she comes out and adopts the transfem/trans woman label and a target is placed where the privilege used to be.

that said, i as a transmasc butch am susceptible to experiencing misogyny and will be for as long as misogyny exists. i would experience it even if these weren't the case, but it is exacerbated by the fact that i will never pass and i don't want to. the transphobia that transmascs experience is not able to be meaningfully separated from misogyny.

whether they're telling us that we're victims of a cult, or they're sending us to mental hospitals, or they're beating and raping us for not being women, the experiences of transmascs cannot be separated form misogyny. they're either telling us that we're too stupid to know what we want, too hysterical to know what we want, or that we have to be shown by 'real' men what our place is to them, all because we are perceived as women who are stepping out of line.

that fact is not in conflict with the fact that the transphobia trans women experience is completely inseparable from misogyny. both of these things are true, because misogyny is what's at the heart of most, if not all, anti-queer movements.

it's bad for men to be feminine because being feminine is the worst thing a man can be because women are subordinate to men. it's bad for a (perceived) man to be a woman because a woman is the worst thing a man can be because women are subordinate to men. it's bad for a woman to be masculine because women should be subordinate to men. it's bad for a (perceived) woman to be a man because women should be subordinate to men.

conservatives and transphobes will change their concepts of the genders of any trans people they feel like to suit their narrative, but i think an interesting and relatively consistent worldview that conservatives and transphobes have about transgender people are that transmascs are often women who are stepping out of line and thus deserving of vicious and violent misogyny to punish them, and to warn other (perceived) women who are thinking of stepping out of line, while transfems are often seen as their own distinct class of woman, separate from the kind of woman they perceive transmascs as, a kind of woman who can exist specifically to be abused for not being 'woman enough', but there's no goalpost they could possibly reach to ever be 'woman enough'. not because they keep moving it, but because they're arguing for a goalpost that doesn't exist and they know it.

this isn't to say that transmascs can't experience male privilege, can't benefit from misogyny or punch down, but rather that the experiences of transmascs and the oppression they receive is much, much more complicated than "just" transphobia, but actually it's fine because male privilege, in the theoretical ways that a lot of people, many of whom aren't transmasc, like to talk about the transphobia a transmasc can experience on here.

you don't decide you're transmasc and suddenly pass as male or gain male privilege like magic. if you believe that dressing androgynously magically gives you male privilege, you are not hanging around transmascs and you have not listened to their experiences with transphobia. please pick up a book.

male privilege itself is a trap, but it's not a trap afforded to just anyone who claims to be male, and the often situational male privilege a transmasc has doesn't somehow magically cancel out the misogyny-based oppression or the plain misogyny that transmascs experience as a whole.

forgive the annoying comparison, but as a disabled person i feel comfortable making it: the ableism an invisibly/not as visibly disabled person experiences is not somehow canceled out when they benefit from ableism against a more visibly disabled person.

talking about the misogyny that a trans man experiences is not "feminizing" trans men or "masculinizing" trans women. talking about the misogyny a transmasc experiences is not saying that trans women do not experience misogyny. it's not transphobic to point out the root causes of the oppression that all trans people face, even when it manifests in very different ways.

but that's just my thoughts on the intersections of transphobia and misogyny that trans people experience. if you have a differing perspective, i'd love to discuss it with you.

[byebyebbyblu]

Excuse me, I saw one of your posts--one where you said that what makes a butch a butch is who they are and not how they dress--and now I’m wondering if I am a butch or not because I don’t know exactly what “acting like a butch” means. I’ve been wondering this way before I saw your post because my family (conservative) sees me a super masculine, while my friends (queer) see me as androgynous, or even feminine at times. It’s a bit of a mess how people perceive me, but it’s interesting to see.

So, my question is, what are some traits that are “recognizable” when it comes to being a butch, if there are any? And how would you call an androgynous lesbian? Futch? Butch of Schrödinger?

Thank you in advance, and sorry for any inconveniences.

Hey thanks so much for the ask!

First of all I’m sorry if my post made you feel invalid that wasn’t my intention at all. I was trying to convey the complicated way that Butchness works and never meant to seem like I was positioning myself as some kind of authority because I’m not.

So far what acting Butch means. This question has a lot of nuance, it means a lot of different things to different people, you’re going to get a lot variety of answers. Acting Butch to me means loving your fellow Butches and Femmes, psychically and emotionally protecting the more vulnerable members of your community, and preforming masculinity in a way that challenges the “typical cis het male ideal of masculinity.”

I developed my idea of what acting like a Butch means from reading books by older Butches like Female Masculinity, Stone Butch Blues and Butch as a noun. I highly recommend them but please make sure to mind the trigger warnings. I’ve also learned a lot from older Butches on social media. @cowboyjen68 on here is a wonderful source.

For your last question some people do call themselves Futches (more as a joke then an actual identity) but there dosen’t seem to be a solid word for androgenous lesbian that I could find (maybe GNC or gender non conforming lesbian) If you feel like the label of Butch might fit you however I would suggest just trying it out. Labels are meant to fit you and if you try it and it dosen’t fit the worst thing that happens is that you were wrong. I personally tried the Butch label after IDing as a trans man for a while and it fit like a glove where the Trans man label didn’t.

Finally i’m sorry about your conservative family, I hope you’re safe and in a place where you can be loved for who you are. And if after reading this you find that the Butch label fits. Welcome home. We’re happy to have you!

[tomyo]

Nimona and a Decade of the Queer Experience

To me one of the most anticipated aspects of the Nimona adaptation was to see how they changed the a lot of the queer themes from the original comic. Nimona was created in a time where it was still taboo to represent same sex relationships in anything trying to be marketable into an era where it is so commonplace that Nimona would have seemed regressive if it stayed true to the material.

Naturally the way Blackheart and Goldenloin are portrayed has greatly changed but also has a lot of the message from the original. Nimona is now about the trans experience.

This isn't to say transness was never at the core of Nimona but I don't think even baby nonbinary me would have been able to connect it directly to that.

Nimona the comic, to me, deals with similar but different issues from Nimona the movie. The comic was a story of trying to upheave an untrustworthy militarized state through the initially goofy lens of a budding father daughter relationship that ultimately fails.

Blackheart at the start of the comic already is trying to defy the government and Nimona seeks him out because he's actually playing the role of the villain already. She herself felt like this mix of female and queer rage. It made believe somewhat in the idea that the little girl by the end of the story was truly her who had once tried to do better for her home and was rejected for becoming something *different*. Overall you can feel more presently that deafening dread that Blackheart and Goldenloin love each other and acknowledging that would ruin both of their lives. This is moreso due to that whole conflict of their ideologies and sides they are on interfering but the metaphor is there. We could read this easily as Blackheart being out of the closet and at odds with society where Goldenloin on in the closet and working on the name of oppression. By showing Blackheart looking visibly like a villain it harkens back to the queer coding of Disney villains and a feeling a lot of queer people had to experience at that time, being an enemy to the public simply for existing. Coming back to Nimona, she's the perfect example of a trans masc egg experience; punk in a way that isn't fully certain in embracing or trashing anything feminine. Not fully androgynous but butchy and an unfocused anger at everything around them. I can never speak for the entirety of the trans experience but I know the feeling being born in an afab body and violently hating the society that I want badly to accept me, the way we insist that we intend to fully express our being while also creating this weird mix of unconvincing conformity. Again I laugh so much at her design elements; shaved head, tomboyish in chainmail but with curves, and short dresses, and impractical belts. Her actions also read as someone who's greatest sore point is loss of her bodily autonomy which ultimately she's subjected to during the climax. The monster/power of Nimona to me tends to ultimately mirror more of an emotional state rather than transness itself. Both version of Nimona have people see it as something Nimona is inflicted with rather than a part of her existence as she reveals at the end. Even Blackheart believe he can cure her of it with the equivalence of a procedure or medication but it's because he only perceives Nimona as the little girl and not the little girl as a part of the whole that is the dragon. I think there is a lot of things we can read into the dragon being and even at the idea that queerness is something people seek to cure that doesn't need one in the first place. And ultimately that's why the story ends on the somber tone it does, the biggest focus of the story was how Blackheart became the parent to Nimona and misguidedly tried to 'fix' her. And like a lot of people, especially for the time period, Nimona had to leave behind the family and society that couldn't accept her as her.

And so we move forward through the years.

Media is not made in a vacuum, Nimona the comic is a critique of early 2010s ideologies and maybe doesn't even worry about them as serious in a pre 2016 world. Nimona 2023 however exists on the other side of that threshold. Like I said, I don't think the original comic was consciously trans mostly because the zeitgeist wasn't conscious of transness. 2012-2014 (the comic's creation period) encapsulated me personally going from no aware knowledge of gender to confusion at learning my friend's pronouns to fully identifying as nonbinary in a world few people knew what that meant. But not long after that we had Korra's ending, the reveal of Ruby and Sapphire, Kaitlynn Jenner, Menanists, and then the nightmare of the 2016 election and all that came with it. The truth is a contradiction occurred; queerness became a part of the in group so long as it followed the rules of heteronormativity. I think it is fair to say a lot of queer people became more eeeh conservative for lack of better terms. For once we finally had a chance to be out and so long as we followed the conditions set out, exist well. We can live comfortably, why rock the boat? In other words, respectability politics. We are then at odds with those who believe we should keep complacent for fear of being rejected.

That brings us to Nimona the movie.

Blackheart no longer is the guerilla activist he once was, we now are introduced to him as a part of the system; specifically the model minority. Movies only have so much time for you to build understanding of it's world themes and ideas and so it tends to need to be more punchy with getting the point across otherwise become less coherent. So rather on the nose "Knighting a non noble is against god" as very flatly stated in the begging. Since the time of the comic, being gay has been normalized and we now see Blackheart and Goldenloin start out as a couple (to be frank I couldn't fully tell if they were official or not but they were all but in writing together) and by in universe logic, Goldenloin is the golden child pastor's son with divisively accepted boyfriend. Blackheart is an inspiration for his common men while his noble classmates are disgusted at the idea of him being allowed the same rights as them, essentially being allowed to be an policeman. It's his role as the model minority that he still believes the system is right when he is framed for murder; it is the one bad actor who's at fault despite a whole society shunning him with little reasoning needed.

Nimona in the other hand is a bit more in control of the relationship. Nimona of the comic latched onto a spurned man who was more methodical than she was in her work but Nimona of the movie is pretty much what pushes Blackheart into the image of a villain. Movie Nimona's goal is more or less to find community and for reasons we will get to only believes she can find it with other cast aside from society. She is jaded enough to know that Blackheart will continue to be labeled as the way they do to her. This time the shape shifting is explicitly trans; Nimona now is no longer worried about experimentation or trying to be cured but of being called a monster, the fear of her, and eradication; words I feel like I've heard too much in lgbt spaces lately. She talks about wanting her own demise with her heard turned down and eyes somber in moments that hit too close to home. She is a worn down warrior for her own existence. On safer grounds with Blackheart she more wittingly challenges his transphobia. Blackheart cannot perceive her out of the binary that she is default a girl and her transformations are something else, he asks if her transitions hurt, and he tries to convince her to blend in with others for his own comfort. As he spends more time with her, he's able to view the world he was taught differently and doesn't view the less pretty sides of Nimona as scary. However, programming is hard to free yourself out of.

The Director is by definition, conservative. She believes is a religious like text that society should not change unless it all falls a part. Her belief in this runs so deep that she easily is willing to kill pseudo religious figures as her personal code of morals override any actual logic in faith(anyone remember how magas talk about Trump as being sent by God while also disavowing him for encouraging vaccinations?). Her rhetoric that non nobles with be a societal slip eminates classism and racism (commoner is somewhat of a race allegory). She denies her own words to hold power, criticizes Nimona of whispering deceipt into blackhearts ear while actually being the one doing so to Goldenloin, and justifies her actions through holy scripts. She holds a stern belief in cleansing the society of it's demons down to intending to kill a large part of her society to rid it of the tran metaphor Nimona is. She is the quintessential conservative power so bent on it staying that way that she will destroy everything in spite of any logic to why it's right. Goldenloin, as the champion of the institution, a head cop if you will, looks upon the chaos learning the director's intent to kill thousands and says "what are we doing here?" A lot of institutions (aah there's the naming for you) in our country are like this. I think to some like, there are people who entered religion or became a police officer because they wanted to do good. But the rhetoric in these spaces can skew that perspective exponentially. Some with better access out may find that point of "What are we doing her" The moment the logic of the system no longer makes sense. I would love to talk more a lot this an the comic institution at a later point.

Back to Nimona and the queer identity.

Nimona was searching for a group to accept her, changing her appearance to fit in. She thinks she has it with Gloreth until Gloreth is taught that Nimona's existence was monstrous and rejects her as well. The scene of the villagers attacking her is poinient as well; they endanger and threaten her with violence (which would likely have been more explicit if not for kids) and she first turns to something weaker to escape but they refuse and so she is forced to turn to something bigger ane vicious in order to live but it only sets up the narrative that there is a reason to fear her when she didnt attack first, she simply had to protect herself. Nimona in the present is ready for her death, the narrative so out of control that it breaks her.

Blackheart is able to bring her back from the brink by doing the important thing of truly apologizing, have humility for his mistrust and bigotry, and offer her support on equal terms. Nimona this time does not flee her friend that failed her but sacrifice herself for the hope of a better future beyond the walls.

The final part to mention; the walls. The walls are mad out as a big deal in this. No one leaves beyond them and the one small town of Gloreth fills to a big capitalist tech dystopia that markets dragons as both cute mascots and something to eradicate to as young as children. Society is a small shoebox not allowed to even see beyond the walls; see a new potential of this world. Simply put, the beyond is the beyond of heteronormative society. Even as society has become more accepting of LGBT identities, it has only liked to consume it in an easily interpreted manor. There are a lot of even just fringe identities that used to get lambasted for being weird simply for existing, trying to apply those same rules within their spaces as they've become socially acceptable. For every push forward we make, there is still presentation and identity that will get ostracized for being out of the box. We create these walls and only build them out further every so often rather than knocking them down. If there is anything to take from Nimona it's to embrace the beyond.

Morning edit; Hiii thank you for reading all of this. I kinda furiously typed this after watching the movie last night and there are certainly some flaws for it. Towards the end you can see a lot of typos because I was literally falling asleep and there are definitely some concepts I would've liked to flesh out better but kinda glossed over to focus on what the stories were saying about Nimona specifically. I think if anything, I'd want to reexamine Blackheart in both stories because I honestly forgot a lot of his actions in the comic, same with the institution because it took a while to even remember about the Director being a character from the comic. To be real, there's some really specific events on where Nimona was made that tend to hit me pretty hard so I rushed through the comic when I read it last year. I might try to take me time now because Nimona is so meaningful. I even want to talk about how it made sense Disney tried to shut it down (I'm certain there's a lot of business reasons but I don't think it was compatible with the Disney brand). For all the ways we have queer stories, I don't think we see a lot of trans stories yet. I'm hoping the series like Dead End Paranormal Park and Nimona are the start of a new era that focally represent that.

[prototypeluv]

yap session 01: gender and yt supremacy

Something's been plaguing my mind lately- the idea of my gender. What I'm perceived as- I know a lot of my peers just play me off as a 'woman'. Which in SOME ways, I agree with. For example: my experience growing up as a black fem will forever change my perspective. Black women are one of the most hated demographics, even without the queerness I associate myself with. The world is ridiculously antiblack, and it sounds insane, but I unfortunately don't see that mindset changing anytime soon.

A lot of the black genderqueer folk I meet are fem presenting like me. Whenever we get to why, it always comes to this: it's easier to navigate life as a hyperfeminine person in the black community. Blk women are already masculinized to a certain degree, our natural bodies being called provocative. The features of our faces are picked on because they don't adhere to a white standard. Black athletes in women's divisions often are forced into being drug tested because of endless accusations of performance enhancers. We're disrespected on the sole basis of being black and feminine, add queerness to the equation and it makes things ten times more difficult.

My features are soft, and my body is shapely- I cannot pull off the androgyny that I desire to attain. There's never black androgynous rep, just pale and predominantly white folks. It's ruined my self-image in some ways. I look in the mirror and curse the lips given to me by my mother. My high cheekbones and small face do nothing but feminize me. I can wear the most 'masculine' outfit (whatever that is) and still be seen as just a woman. The complexity of my gender isn't acknowledged due to my features. I turn to hyper-femininity because it gives me one extreme when I can't pull both. I do my makeup, wear skirts and crop tops, embrace the natural curves of my body...because it's all I can do.

I don't want to be seen as just a woman. Yes, I consider myself a black woman, but that's because my experiences are intertwined with my gender identity. The experience of growing up as a black woman carries with you. It's always in the back of my mind when I'm in public. I can't be too loud; I can't be upset, or I'll be a walking stereotype. My solidarity lies with black women, it forever will- especially considering that the faces of androgyny are nothing like me. Name a black genderqueer icon that doesn't have money- that doesn't have access to the fashion, makeup, and wigs that we working-class queer folk don't. You can't. All of our ideas surrounding androgyny are just combined aspects of a white supremacist beauty standard. A pretty face (slender nose, long eyelashes, sharp jaw, smaller lips) and a 'masculine' body (muscle, thin, tall, shorter torso and longer legs). Realistically I will never attain this form because I *can't*.

I want to be confusing; I want to be a pretty boy- handsome and gorgeous at the same time. I want to change outfits and be properly gendered despite what I wear. I want to fit that standard, as much as I hate admitting it.

[gerrydelano]

Btw, i wanted to ask: what makes you hc Gerry as transfem? I'm more of a nb/transmasc gerry leaning person but i love reading about different interpretations of characters and you are obviously very passionate About it (feel free to ignore if its an uncomfortable question, there's no judgement behind it-im just curious.)

hello hello! no worries, i didn't perceive any judgment here, this is all in good fun! my gerry is on the nonbinary side of transfem anyway (which to me is an important thing to portray in general) but it is special to me both for logical reasons and just because it just feels so healing to me. i wrote a big meta about it here a really long time ago, and answered a more recent ask here, so i'll mostly just link those to avoid being too repetitive.

however, to me (just me personally!) the logic comes in as like... mary calls him gerard. she doesn't exactly strike me as a supportive ally parent who would gender her trans son correctly. eric also refers to gerry as his son, and he died when gerry was like 2, which is a little early for a kid to know they're trans. thirdly, he has a canon preference for a nickname that Isn't the name his mother calls him, which to me can signify dysphoria, and that chosen name happens to be a little more androgynous! plenty of women use the same nickname.

i don't believe canon gerry would have really had much of a chance to explore this side of him, as i also just believe he's a late bloomer, so to me it usually comes out easier in AUs where he's able to live for once. live free of his oppressive mother and her expectations of A Son And Heir, live free of the violence of his childhood and the things she made him do, live as a softer person. i think he would benefit from letting himself be softer, i think he would feel healthier and stronger and more himself if he gained some distance from The Son And Heir archetype forced on him from Pretty Much Birth. there are things to be said about what's expected of "sons" and how awfully people are often treated to try and mold them into the right kind of son, and that's something that gerry's story strikes close to for me.

all of that, and i also just find tenderness in this HC that fills my heart with love! i have gotten to write some really beautiful moments of exploration and intimacy and solidarity through this portrayal of him and it's just been so warm. so many people, especially on this site and especially fucking lately, have been expressing ideas that suggesting that someone might be transfem is inappropriate compared to suggesting that someone might be transmasc, that being transfem is a bad thing or a curse or an insult, and ngl it's all such bullshit.

we need kinder and more loving portrayals of transfeminine people of all walks just in general. and sometimes you just get the egg vibes off of somebody and it's okay. so, yes! i simply think estrogen could have saved her.

[not-goldy]

Goldy, this is coming from a place of respect, so please hear me out.

First of all, let us replace the word "victim" with "survivor." I think we can all agree that this is an appropriate word choice for Jimin.

And yes, Jimin is a survivor of harassment, stalking, homophobic slurs, death threats, misogyny, etc. And yes, he has more than once, indicated he feels safe with JK and depends on JK to protect him.

But JK hasn't done such a great job of protecting Jimin from any of this so far, has he?

What do I expect him to do, you ask? Exactly my point. How do people envision the muscle bunny will protect Jimin in the MS?

I get the idea that people are picturing Jimin surrounded by a group of homophobic assholes and JK fighting them off, one by one. But in this scenario, obviously Jimin would fight side-by-side with JK, and not just wilt in a corner. This is Jimin, right?

But we know it's much more likely that any threat (see the list above) will be much more insidious. JK may be brawnier than Jimin is, but is he cleverer? They aren't going to a deserted island, after all. Does JK have a better understanding of human relations, law, psychology, etc.? I mean, who is the Slytherin here?

And who is THE survivor? (Again, see list above.)

I'm sure there will be times when JK's courage and strength will help support Jimin in the months ahead. But there will be just as many times--perhaps more--when Jimin's courage and strength will help JK.

If people are going to make them a team/couple, can we please just make them an EQUAL one?

I want to be goofy and belt out I'm ah survivor I'm not gon give up, imma suhvaaavv keep on suhvaaavin

This is the point my teacher yells at me to walk out the classroom 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

Survivor is woke- describing Jimin as a Survivor is both powerful and optimistic however I'm uncomfortable with it especially since I feel he's still surviving these mofos every single day.

Also, I understand your pov however I do think there is such a thing as overly idealistic.

Here's a few of my recent posts- in case my numerous posts went over heads- talking about individualizing Jimin, holding him to the same expectations we have of Jungkook, how he's equally supposed to be protecting Jungkook as JK should be protecting him and that it shouldn't be one sided.

So I think you preaching to the choir.

However, what we are talking about is a little bit deeper than that. More nuanced than that.

When we are talking about things Jimin, "survives" in this shit hole of a Fandom, I do not think it is in any way comparable to or EQUAL to that of his couple mate as you put it.

And that's just because they are disproportionately affected by certain things, Homophobia for one. While Jungkook may occasionally have misogynistic slurs hurled at him for "behaving feminine" Jimin is the one who is constantly being berated just because of his androgynous appearance- which he cannot help.

Yes they are partners, and equal if not we wouldn't insist on calling them a power couple, however it's just one of them that gets slutshamed and treated as if slut is his second name.

And just because we express worry over the things that affect one more than the other don't mean we are victimzing that person. I think people who keep spewing that narrative have lost it fr.

For instance, while they are equal, certainly we cannot say they received the same commercial support from their company or Fandom. Saying that does not take away the fact Jungkook is equally oppressed out in these streets.

On the topic of protection, I honestly don't think your assumptions about how JM is being perceived as being protected by Jk is accurate or what at all we mean when we talk about that we are happy they are enlisting together- does it make our shipper hearts glee? Absolutely. Do we want to dance on Graves? Oh honey yesssssssssssssssssszzzzzzzzzzzzzzah.

But do we think Jungkook is going to be his personal body guard in there swatting off homophobic flies- now ma'am. Let's be real. Jungkook is also a gay man. What makes you think we think Jimin will be receiving blows after bliw while JK goes unscathed- i mean God forbid it happens- but If Jungkook is queer doesn't it stand to reason we should be and are equally worried for him? Because he is not exempt from the scathing heats of homophobia?

However he's also not the one receiving death threats and threats to out him to the military now is he?

I think I- we- are well within our rights to express concerns about these matters. And I think objectively that is not victimizing Jimin. But to each their own.

If you've ever experienced homophobic violence, or "survived" anything in your life you'd understand how scary these things are.

Also when we speak of protection- I don't think it's necessary to swing the pendulum that far off. There's safety in numbers is all we are saying and I think that's objectively accurate too. Jungkook or whomever don't need to physically carry his frying pan around to protect Jimin or for Jimin to protect him.

I think every female in here can attest to the fact merely sharing your location or letting your uber driver know someone is waiting for you on the other end and will come looking for you if anything happens to you makes us feel safe and protected in certain situations.

I know a couple who liked to leave the stereo on to create the impression people were home to deter theives from breaking in when they were away.

Protection can be as psychological as is physical. Honestly you are giving male privilege if you can't relate to these things. Or if all you think about when we mention Protection is physical exertion of force or violence.

Jikook can be eachother's support blah blah blah in there or not- the point is it puts our minds at ease knowing Jimin is not going to be alone in there.

And I know you are not about to ask me why my concerns are for Jimin and not Jk- no. It's not because I think he can't defend himself. A. He's my bias and he gets emotional priority in certain situations. B. As I said, he receives the most homophobic/misogynistic attacks c. It's my page and I can do whatever I want.

And I think I speak for Mama Park and Mama Jeon when I say that we are happy Jimin will not be alone- he has family with him.

We are women. Our maternal instincts will always be to protect our babies 🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭

That said, Park Jimin I am not your mama I will fuck you given the chance. Be warned accordingly.

[barbielore]

Pride Month is again upon us so it is again my duty to note that there is technically no named character in the Barbie doll line who is unambiguously LGBT.

I have posted before about various LGBT / pride Barbies so just for reference:

Last year's pride month posts one and two

Lesbian Visibility Day post

Not discussed in any detail was Mattel's foray into dolls with customizable gender expression, the Creatable World line. Marketed as promoting creativity and customization, these dolls were designed to look more androgynous than either Barbie or Ken.

Inclusivity of gender diversity was explicitly a part of the brand statement for this line - Mattel designer Kim Culmone stated “Toys are a reflection of culture, and as the world continues to celebrate the positive impact of inclusivity, we felt it was time to create a doll line free of labels.” 

This caught some flak for "sinfully" suggesting that gender isn't as straightforward as Barbie and Ken make it look, with the One Million Moms petition protesting it saying, "Mattel has actually created a toy that glorifies gender inclusivity and ignores one's biological sex."

To me, that sounds like a selling point rather than a criticism, but I'm far from one of the One Million Moms.

Not all the backlash was conservative-driven: Devon Price wrote for Medium, while acknowledging why a great number of trans people find the line validating, raised some other criticisms, such as that the line reinforces the idea of "androgyny" as looking essentially like slim tomboyishness when we should be promoting the idea that bodies of all shapes do not have to be perceived as gendered.

I can absolutely see the point, though I personally wonder if that is a little high concept for Mattel, the company behind Barbie "Don't Eat" Roberts.

Either way the doll line has quietly faded away after two releases, with this being variously attributed to the backlash from conservatives, poor sales, limited access (as they were sold only in some retailers), to them not being interesting enough to grab the attention of children.