#i learned im actually way worse at art than i thought and that even tho i took a beginning algebra class last semester

[bacchuschucklefuck]

the never stop blowing up vhs is where cute twinks go to get harmed

[superemeralds]

🌷How will they deal with saying goodbye?

👯‍♀️How often do they see the others? Their other friends, too?

🖤Free space! Ask what you like, or request a random headcanon

<- hit us with your weirdest shot?

🌷shadow and omega b oth have very complicated relationships w the concept of good bye. they don't really age or die? omega specifically has the advantage of having very limited emotion and a highly logic mind, so he would not waste energy mourning and accept when things end. Shadow is def still trying to figure it all out. as of rn in universe ofc he doesn't have to think abt it much yet, he's doing his best to prevent his friends from harm right now, and he'd rather just face the problems as they happen. especially in shth he learned that theres no use thinking about the what ifs, because there's a right now that needs to be dealt with. the more he thinks about what differenciates him from others the less he can concentrate on what matters: the things he's got in common. like the ground beneath their feet, the star they orbit around, the wind that blows in their faces... He knows about the inevitability of death enough through maria, and he will try his best to not make the same mistake twice. he's determined to move on. ofc its easier said than done, especially in the conceptual event that rouge would fall in combat or even worse.. because of a mistake that he made.. but there are so many possibilities that i could analyze we'd be here for ever.........

rouge herself i think hasdealt with loss before, and she might have had some history with people that she has cut out of her lives. it might seem cold but i think she as a person has mastered the art of severing. whether its healthy is not the question rn... she def has a very soft spot for shadow and omega, tho as stated above these two are really hard to kill so there's not much to worry about in that regard, if anything it's a worry that might not plague her right now, but eventually she's going to think about what it means to be the one that's being severed by forces beyond anyone's control

anyways i dont wanna get existential this morning so this is where i stop

👯‍♀️I headcanon rouge has some friends she regularly meets in her bar (i'll let it be open if it actually belongs to her or if she's just a regular) and she would def visit knuckles every now and then. not saying she'd like. actually talk to him tho. might just lurk in a bush and stare at the master emerald

omega is a tough one to think about tbh. i admittedly don't have too many thoughts on him outside of being part of the team... this is telling me i need to dig more into his individual character tbh. what would he do for fun? when not with the otehr two?? Maybe he actually is like a gamer playing shooters and made friends in voice chat. no one believes him when he introduced himself as killermachine, they think its just a nickname

shadow likes solitude, but i really like that one bit in the recent twitter take over where he and knuckles stood in the forest for hours watching the plants and animals and hwo the light changes throughout the day while going through the leaves etc etc... theyre both very connected to nature in their own ways and i think they could bond over that. also about how they both prefer solitude. they can be alone together! they dont need any words, they can just exist next to eachother for a few hours and feel good about it. he also most surely hangs out with sonic every now and then. hangingout being racing and having a good fight together. though im sure sonic can eventually convince him to spend proper time together. for example making a race into a trekking tour where they go random places sonic knows or doesnt know yet, and they learn about the culture and obviously the food. shadow does seem like someone who'd like to learn about the planet, and sonic's the type of guy who's super eager to have someone to show around and explore with that can keep up!

🖤oh man idk weirdness is super subjective. uh. i wrote a fanfic once about how team dark and team sonic have a bowling competition

[petorahs]

☀️ its fascinating that you say P3 has shaped your worldview because... Well not to trauma dump here but back then when I discovered the game (it was back then when p4 was already out) i was... In a REALLY bad place and wondering about unaliving myself. I wont go into much detail but kids are trash man and teens are even worse. and then this game came around. With an aesthetic I really liked. i am not a native english speaker so it was hard for me at first but somehow this game just... /spoke to me/. A game about life and death and what it means to be alive and what it means to have a REASON to live, somehow... Convinced me to go a bit longer. I mean it when I say this: Persona 3 saved my life. And no other game can ever come close to such an experience. (Even tho from a quality standpoint P5 certainly is up there)

oh dude that is so valid thank you for sharing this. seriously though, im happy that youre here! and im sure many others are too! the ☀️ brightening lives and all that :]

yea i can see why p3 just clicked with so many people since it first came out. i was always curious on why it's so beloved by fans, when p5 and even p4 are literally right there with their overall better gameplay experiences. p5 literally got the franchise mainstream to insane heights lol. im... so glad i got into persona the way i did. of course, everyone's experiences w these games are different and special to them in their own way.

i got into persona 3 as an adult and as a result the lens in which i viewed the story's themes were heightened, in a way. as a teen i just know i would have reacted more volatilely i struggle to think about it LOL but both experiences would still be pretty intense. it's just that, as an adult there's more room to digest it when im not troubled by algebra hw. i was just more equipped for it (also i played omori two summers ago LMAOO). ofc i only turned 20 a few weeks ago LOL but i get why p3 means so much to people.

because it's like... 2000s nostalgia coupled with a game that figuratively holds your hand through the uncertainty of death yknow? p3 is a friend, basically. its entire thesis is based upon companionship (exactly what i highlight in an analysis i have drafted somewhere but HHH i dont want this to get too long lmao)

in the shaping my worldviews thing... its really more like it cemented my 'philosophies' :] like i said, equipped with the stuff i learned before, p3 having the message that it did just... hit super close to home! like yeah! that's what i've been saying dude!! kindness really is enough!!

"You don't have to save the world to find meaning in life... Sometimes all you need is something simple, like someone to take care of."

LIKE YEA GIRL THATS EXACTLY IT!! its so cool! i actually admire people who grew up with p3 because man if i heard this line ages ago... well, again, idk if i would be able to grasp it fully at the time... but still! this is so good, poetry in motion. and like u said its aesthetics are gorgeous and aim to capture the essence of its themes - and it did.

im a p5 baby like bro i love p5. soft spot for it. thats the closest persona game i "grew up" with and it came at such an opportune time for me, being a teen stuck between a rock and a hard place. typical. and p5 validated my teenage angst bs so much. its so refreshing to see a game's theme being rebellion. that was me i thought. those characters are going through something that similarly happened to me. teenage rebellion is such a fun thing to explore!

so p5 validated my struggles while p3 did something deeper than that, somehow. i think it just made me .. stronger? like it made me move on from struggles. "by remembering death you learn how to live" so... i guess p3 taught me how to live as crazy as that sounds. but you get me

persona 5 overall is great -- everyone agrees, like its objectively just a better game. but persona 3 ends up more beloved because of its subjective value as a piece of art. there's a lot of heart and soul to put into it.

it's more simple when compared to p5 at first glance, but simple doesn't mean less. which is why more people experiencing it will be nice to see

[krustworld]

I’m a special type of lonely cuz I’ve been naturally popular my whole life.….technically I don’t know that’s not the case for everybody. Anywys My parents never let me have friends (cuz of religion) so I never learned how to cultivate my ppl skills. Now I’m behind and even tho ppl want to like me…im strange and most ppl don’t fuck with that. Even tho they say they do/will I swear so few ppl

Are even 1% open minded ! It’s chill it’s so hard forme to actually connect w people it’s not worth it rather throw myself into my art. Plus I can be myself around my few friends. It sucked growing up not being able to do anything I wanted to do it definetly made my mental problems worse for context I got taken away from my birth mother at a young age I don’t wanna say why bc I love her so much don’t wanna put her on blast but she lost custody had no visitation rights and I didn’t even talk to her on the phone until I ran away at 17! By that time I didn’t remember what she looked like I used to cry about that all the time cuz I thought she was gonna die and I’d never rememeber again I just remembered that she was beautiful and had the greenest eyes in the world! When she picked up the phone I fell to my knees and cried for the first time in 8 years my chest was going crazy is all I could remeber. Anyways My dad and stepmom raised me across the country and they were super super religious and never let me out of their sight it oh yeah we also had this family restaurant that no kidding! I worked at every single day even after school until close and every single day of the summer from open to close ! Which during the summer we would close at 10 pm or later sometimes lollll we would consistently get home at midnight cuz all the cleaning everyday (during summer) was way more than 12 hours everyday god it makes me sad I should’ve been having a childhood bro and oh yes I was the only one in the family who didn’t have a day off every week[or ever!!! Not even once!) cuz young =strong and oh yeah it’s my fault they’re in debt cuz my mom crazy this was something that was regularly said to my young impressionable heart! I would tell u more but I don’t want anybody to get in trouble lollll for real u guys have no idea it was torture especially after being able to do whatever I wanted in the early years of my life it’s so hard to be nice to myself cuz I’ve been treated with such hostility by the ppl supposed to nurture me they literally used me for money and getting their anger out lol yeah living with my mother had it’s problems but I had already learned to deal with them and found identity/security in them and taking me away from her just stripped me of my identity not to mention MY MOTHER and gave me new problems that were just too much with all the other shit that doesn’t just go away cuz I’m not actively there anymore! Ur souls lives everywhere you go that’s why u have to be careful with yourself and with ur kids </3 also for the record I love my dad and stepmom don’t think they meant to be so cruel to me they’re just hurt

[thecoolerliauditore]

I know I don't deserve another response from you, so just ignore this if you want. I'm sorry, I shouldn't have sent that message. I appreciate the kindness you gave me that I don't really deserve.

Honestly... I just can't believe that artists don't have a knack to start with. Because I've always had a knack for anything I'm good at, like math. I never really had to put effort into learning math. And even the things that I'm good at that did take effort I still had a knack at the beginning. I'm not trying to downplay artists' effort, I know it does take effort, but I don't think you can just start from 0. Or at least, I can't. So I'm not making that conclusion just on other people's art but also in other things I'm good at.

By the way, I'm not the person who sent the "life is unfair" ask, but I was already feeling negative and saw Struda's response and I reacted even worse.

My life's going pretty well all things considered, and I'm going to a good college to study some STEM related stuff. In the background I've struggled with this desire to be creative, though, and I'm trying to stifle that desire but it's not working, and no one really seems to have tutorials on how to get rid of that desire. I have a therapist and parents I could talk to, but doing so didn't help, either, because they don't understand what I'm trying to say.

I'm sorry also that it came off as guilt trippy. I'm really bad with managing my tone, especially when I'm feeling like this. I don't mean that as an excuse but as an explanation.

nah this is way more like it, i think we all need a bit of practice online with talking to each other like actual human beings and not text boxes to write ur entire internal monologue into 👍

happy to hear your life is going okay! If anything I'm just glad you're an adult who can reflect on yourself enough to recognize what you were doing was not great. I was trying to keep things vague as possible because, again, idk you and you could've been a 13 year old with no allowance for all i know lol.

i've noticed alot of beginner artists tend to have this.. all or nothing mindset? i don't really understand the desire to stifle your need to create. like. are you not allowed to have a hobby lol. amateur means to love yada yada. especially if you're not trying to make a living out of it where's the rush 😭😭

Going to link this marco bucci video again because even tho it's long it's probably one of the most eye-opening things I've ever watched in terms of his view on talent, gifted kid syndrome, etc.

I used to say I had a 'knack' for art tbh. then i realised i.. really didn't? i just drew more than the other kids in my class because i didn't like sports or maths and got the reputation for being "the art kid". funnily enough i was also into creative writing and history but no one looks at reciting historical facts like they do with drawing 🤷‍♂️

it wasn't til i was in a course with other artists everywhere when I realised just how not-talented i really was. and thats fine cus none of us really were. some of us were just better at learning than others (which is a trained skill in of itself) and that's about it. 👍

if it helps at all, I have gotten into sports recently despite being useless at it all my life and have realised that it was more that I just needed an environment to flourish in instead of any problem with my athleticism itself (which is STILL BAD don't get me wrong but im not hopeless like my gym teachers thought i was 😭😭). so maybe what u need is just the right people? try finding an online artist community that you fit in, make some friends, and just chill with them while making art together?

again i dunno you so idk what would work lmao

so uh yeah 👍

[b00bstone]

i am not having a good day

[teeth-and-tea]

ANIME & MANGA I HAVE BINGED IN THE LAST MONTH: May 2021

I've Been Hunting Slimes for the Past 300 Years and Now Ive Maxed Out My Level: incredibly long name aside, cute af slice of life that suffers Same Face Syndrome. I'm still happy to watch it because of how feel good and fluffy it is though, Im probably gonna forget about it in two or three years tho. 8/10.

Don't Toy With Me, Miss Nagatoro: I found out this was a webcomic first and suddenly all the HORNINESS made so much more sense. A Femdom, Degradation, Humiliation, Dacryphilia Bullies to Lovers story disguised as a high school rom-com which, I'm not going to lie, misses SKEEVY CITY by mere inches on a regular basis. However, I'm a Dom/Switch and this entire relationship sets off my dom brain center like New York City just shy of midnight. So if you're into that sort of scene, this anime is for you. If not, it's still fascinating but you're probably gonna be a little put off by how mean the Girl!Bully is to the guy MC. Unless you find out something about yourself, in which case, congrats! Stay safe, sane, consensual, and learn about the traffic light system on top of safe words, I promise you'll have a better life in general after that. Still Ongoing, currently 10/10.

Fruits Basket: IM GONNA CRY I LOVE THIS ANIME SO MUCH???? The original anime came out when I was in... I think middle school and my parents were really strict on what I watched so I never got to experience the first wave and I never bothered to watch the show ever after I moved out of the house years later. However, now that I'm much older I honestly can say this is one of my favorite anime to date, and all the characters are charming, lovable, with their own problems that I can connect to or sympathize with, and I love the MC which is always a treat tbh. Except Akito. Akito can suck a sandpaper dick. I'm only on S2 tho so no spoilers! Anime 11/10.

Monster Girl Doctor: went in thinking it was gonna be a monster girl who's a doctor with a homoerotic assistant (her name is SAPPHY okay sue me for thinking it) and ended up watching the entire dubbed harem series. Honestly, I've seen worse and this one has consistent follow-through on interesting characters and backstory enough for me to shove aside the blatant under-monstrousness of the female monsters and the harem-ness of everything else. Dubbing is honestly really good, which is a treat, and the monster designs are not the worst and the MC is tolerable. Honestly, I don't mind having watched it! The mix of cgi and the traditional animation together work pretty strangely though, and it often doesn't flow super well. 7.5/10

So I'm a Spider, So What: Dubbed version which honestly isn't that bad. Took me a bit to get into it, but after realizing that it's got a mismatched timeline a la The Witcher, it made so much more sense. Heavily done in cgi, and you can definitely tell between the 2D and 3D animations, but not the worst in the world. I went in not expecting much but it ended up being an Issekai I can stand and even enjoy. On god has a decent story... with the spider. I'd be a liar if I didnt say I skipped some of the human parts just to get back to the best part of the show. 8/10.

Somali and the Forest Spirit: I'm so fucking nostalgic for this thing it makes me want to go and hug my dad. About a human girl under threat of being eaten with a monster-dominated world. Very obvious "humans fear what they don't understand" message but instead of the humans learning tolerance it's what happens when they get annihilated first so like, kudos for the mangaka for having the guts to do that. I cried like a baby regularly. It's really good, I watched the dub and ID WATCH IT AGAIN!!! 9/10.

To Your Eternity: Oh my god. O h my g o d. Fell in love on the first episode, ngl. About if an immortal being learned how to be a person from scratch. I love it. HOWEVER. Keep a box of tissues on you at all times because you're gonna need them. I'm only on EP7 because that's all that's out right now but just know. I love it. Not for everyone but certainly for my "what do we define as human and the human condition" ass. 12/10.

Those Snow White Notes: A sports anime without any sports. About shamisen playing which is cool because I never realized how cool this instrument was??? Its neat af. OP1&2 are by Burnout Syndrom so know theyre fire. Gonna be real, its pretty alright, but not extraordinary. You can tell they were using the characters as archetypes rather than actually characters which kinda kills a lot of the emotional value you could've had, but I'm still gonna watch it. It doesn't make me cringe as hard as other sports anime tho so I consider it toptier in that regards but if you're a big sports anime fan you might be bummed out by it. Every single musical performance is INCREDIBLE tho. A solid 8/10.

Toilet Bound Hanako-kun: THE ART OMFG IT'S SO GORGEOUS. Listen, if you took coptic markers and gave them an animation budget with some manga panel direction thrown in there, that's this anime. It's beautiful. Gorgeous. I'm in love with the aesthetic every second. Story? Really good. Characters? I love the MC and his evil little twin brother asshat. Demons? Not super imaginative but I'm carrying on happy as can be anyways. Dubbing? A bit shaky at times but I found the voices charming if a little off for some of them. I'm already waiting for the second season with popcorn at the ready. 10/10.

Prison School: I watched this directly after Hanako-kun and it was like I got slapped in the face by sweaty unwashed titties and some fedora wearing schmuck's piss kink. No character is likable or redeemable. I finished it, but at what cost? 2/10 and only because a character shit his pants and I laughed.

Sleepy Princess in the Demon Castle: watched this right after Prison School and it was NECESSARY tbh. Its so CUTE and honestly, im not even kidding you, the fucking funniest anime I've seen in months. I watched the dub and the VAs are having the time of their lives working on this anime not just giving it their all but literally just going ham. Its great. If I read this im sure id be bored outta my mind but the VAs giving it a joyous performance make it an insta fave for me tbh. 9/10.

Sk8 the Infinity: i watched the dub with my bro and I can confirm that its a spectacular show because we both loved it and we have vastly different tastes. Incredibly SUSPENSFUL AND STRESSFUL for an anime about skateboarding but we finished it in a single sitting tbh. The last episode is not dubbed for some reason but we still loved it. Like if Free! was less obnoxious but the only fan-service here is Joe ♡ a beefcake who owns my lesbian heart. I think there's exactly one named female character tho and I legit couldn't tell you what it was if there was a gun to my head. So, over all, 9.5/10.

That Time I Got Reincarnated as a Slime: I'm going to be entirely honest, I went in thinking it was going to be a boring isekai of no value. I was right about the Isekai part. It was honestly pretty interesting and focused on nation building like you're playing civilization rather than the usual "Get Stronger" narrative or "Get Some Pussy" narrative most isekais take which is delightfully refreshing. Granted there are flavors of that in this which means it doesn't alienate the big isekai watchers out there, but it's not the whole dish and it doesn't make me want to cringe the same way others do. You've got a slime MC just vibing and building a nation of monsters nbd. Does lose points for making the female monsters more humanoid than their male counterparts but makes them back by only doing perfunctory fan-service and nothing that makes me want to cry... except the butt sumo episode but in fairness it was all a terrible dream. Literally, the MC refuses to dream anymore after that. solid animation, decent voice acting, decent story, made me realize how HUGE this is in the Light Novel community???? There's like 18 fucking novels and that's WILD. 8.5/10.

MANGA:

Spirit Photographer Saburo Kono: a one shot special by the mangaka of The Promised Neverland! Honestly a really delicate touch of both super creepy and really touching, and I'm not gonna lie I'm bummed that this isn't a bigger project but the single chapter makes it a good taste for their style. I've been wondering if I wanna read/watch The Promised Neverland and now I think I will. 10/10

Deranged Detective Ron Kamonohashi: from the mangaka of Hitman Reborn comes this Sherlock and Watson derivative! Not even 20 chapters out yet with a sort of spotty schedule, I honestly love it even thought it's exactly as you expect. HOWEVER. Kamonohashi the "Sherlock" character uses mental pressure to kill all confirmed murderers and it's up to Toto the "Watson" character to save all those people before Kamonohashi kills them! It's just recently introduced a "Moriarty" family of crime lords (not a big spoiler don't worry it was obvious) so the tension surrounding Ron's past is amping up rn. Personally, I think the art is GORGEOUS, the characters engaging, and the story quick enough to keep my interest. Most mysteries are solved within a chapter or two so you're not stuck 20 chapters into one locked room mystery which is just peachy tbh. RN, 10/10. If this gets an anime, I anticipate a legion of fangirls who ship the two main characters along with their many friends. I've been alive too long to believe otherwise.

Don't Toy with Me, Miss Nagatoro: Yeah I read the manga after I watched the show. A slower build than the anime, but it works for the format, if theyd done the same with the show then I don't think it wouldve done as well. Honestly? Cuter tbh but just as horny. You dont start really LEARNING about your character until like, chap 65 tho and no real "drama" happens until like 75. A good chunk of the chapters are like 8pgs so its a breeze to get through. I love these slow burn idiots of the century. 9.5/10 because you can DEFINITELY tell the mangaka does hentai too.

Yugen's All-Ghouls Homeroom: one-shot by the mangaka for Food Wars, it's no wonder there's this constant perviness from the MC, a guy who can see and exorcise spirits. Takes place at an all girl's finishing school with KICK ASS monsters tbh, kinda bummed its not longer. The MC? Blatant monsterfucker who is also a CONFRIMED monsterfucker???? Idk i vibe with that single emotion. Everything else is hit or miss. 7/10 for monsters and cool concept, lost points for the MC very pointedly being okay with admitting he'd wait for the teenagers to be adults tho. Creepy af. Could live without that.

Hell's Paradise: I finished the entire 127chps in 3 days and I was really enthusiastic about it 90% of the time thinking about how deep it was and then I actually thought about it and I ended up being very neutral about the whole thing tbh. The art is fantastic tho, but DEFINITELY deserving of the M rating. Tits. Tits everywhere. But not tits to be ecchi over, no, monster hermit tits on beautiful women-ish figures. Now generally I give that a pass but a huge theme in the story is that men and women are "no better than one or the other" but like, lady tits are what you see 99% of the time. Men tits are few and far between. I call bullshit on most of the "deep" themes is what I'm saying, so it's like the mangaka was trying for those deep thoughts but missed the margin a little too far for my preference. That being said, the MC is a married man who loves his wife which automatically makes him my favorite character so like... idk so many good things, so many misses, but overall really spectacular themes and imagery. Unique but classic all at once. It's getting an anime and I have NO IDEA how much censorship they're gonna be doing but they're going to be doing SO MUCH. Oh yeah, and one guy is a plant/human hybrid who fucks a 1000 year old plant-hermit which makes him a canon monster fucker. And one canon non-binary character who I, a nonbinary, actually like. So like... gosh I've got mixed feelings. 8.5/10.

Choujin X: From Sui Ishida, mangaka to the mega hit Tokyo Ghoul comes this brand new manga!... Of one chapter, lol. Not really binge-y because it's just the one chapter out right now but I'm already keeping my eye on it. The grasp on anatomy in the art is PHENOMENAL and you can see Ishida flexing his art skill which is great. Can't give a true rating but I'm giving it a tentative 9/10 because I'm excited to see more.

Shag&Scoob: technically not a manga, its an ongoing webcomic I binged an subscribed to in one day and I just think it deserves more attention. Starts off funny with "what if Scooby Doo had a gun" and has been led to "what if all cartoons are aliens that survive and receive their powers by the humans that love them in an epic war with Martians." On god, its good. I finished the current series in a couple hours so it's a breezy read, highly recommend it. 9/10.

To Your Eternity: Yeah I watched the anime and then finished all current 143 chapters in like 3 days. GOD IM WEAK. I don't buy physical manga unless I know I want to remember the story forever and I'm already budgeting for the current books out. Yeah, this is a good series. That being said, definitely not for the faint of heart or those who suffer under common triggers like suicide, molestation, death, etc. It's all framed as bad and necessary to the story don't get me wrong, but it's there and has lasting affects on the characters. Incredible story telling by the creator of A Silent Voice. Keep tissues nearby at all times. 12/10.

[snkpolls]

SnK Episode 65 Poll Results (for Manga Readers)

The poll closed with 318 responses. Thank you to everyone who participated!

Please note that these are the results for the Manga Readers’ poll. If you wish to see the results for the Anime Only Watchers’ poll, click here.

--

RATE THE EPISODE 309 Responses

Overall the episode was a hit with viewers, with the majority ranking it a 4 or higher. Over half of all respondents rating it a solid 5. The hype is real!

I thought this was a great episode. A lot of hype moments and the CGI worked for me, for the most part. Looking forward to the next episode!

All around exceeded my expectations if mappa keeps this up this will go down as the best anime in history

Chef's KISS!!! 10/10 episode, i was extremely hyped the entire time. 

It was amazing and I hope MAPPA keeps up with the same quality for future episodes

Amazing episode really hype

I thought the voice acting was amazing! :)

Great episode, not perfect but neither was WIT. No adaptation is perfect. This was fantastic.

It was pretty good just maybe good have been done better but I’m just happy it was done at all.

I’ve lowered my expectations to rock bottom at this point

An enjoyable time.

I think it was great! I was very excited and left me wanting more tbh

It was a very good episode!! I'm so happy to see the survey corps again!

WHICH OF THE FOLLOWING MOMENTS WAS YOUR FAVORITE? 310 Responses

Mikasa’s reintroduction to the series takes the largest piece of the pie, with 31.6% enjoying the scene the most. In second comes the coordinated attack from the Survey Corps against Porco, with 14.8% feeling that scene really brings the hype. At 10.3%, Levi’s first appearance in the season takes 3rd place, and with 9.7% is the overall fight between Eren and the War Hammer Titan.

Ackermans ran this episode as they should. They're on a whole different level. 

Why isn't the Sasha-Gabi moment in the list of favourite moments? That's my actually favourite moment. Gabi seeing Sasha through the fire and smoke, Sasha's reflection in her eyes...chilling.

THE CGI CONTINUES TO BE A POINT OF CONTENTION. BE HONEST, HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THE EXECUTION OF CGI SO FAR THIS SEASON? 309 Responses

In general, the fandom appears to be understanding of MAPPA’s usage of CGI, with 38.2% being completely unbothered by it, 20.1% feeling that while it’s not ideal, it could be much worse, and 18.8% not particularly caring for it but not faulting MAPPA for it either. A handful of people just wish that there would be more appreciation that it’s getting animated at all, while others continue to be a bit salty about the usage of CGI this season.

Did people forgot the god-awful Colossal titan's CGI from WIT? Well, I didn't so I wasn't surprised by the same level of CGI in Eren's scene (thankfully just one of them). I rarely have issue with CGI in SnK except for truly awful looking ones so like couple of times in the season, usually. 

I honestly wouldn't even know there's CGI if everyone wasn't complaining about it. I honest to god can't see where they use it.

It's mostly fine

I thought the war hammer titan looked AMAZING, the only CGI that looked odd was the scouts in the background, but that’s really it...?

A few sore spots (e.g. Erens titan looked kinda off this ep), but it's not season-ruining yet. 

CGI Titans >>>>>>>> CGI Survey Corps

It works fine for titans that already look somewhat mechanical (Armor, Jaw), but it looks incredibly awkward for the others, to the point of taking me out of the story. 

Sometimes great sometimes shit

Maybe I've been spoiled by studio orange and the previous seasons, but I know for a fact that they can do better. This is not a new anime, this is the final season of one of the greatest anime of all time, so yeah I expected much better CGI, it was poor and unecessary.

i think it’s gr8/unnoticeable,,,,,like we all put up with the colossal titan in s1-3 lmao

Some Titans like Eren and Beast look a little weird but I just really like how they made effort to make it blend with the art style. Maybe if they had found a way to cut the animation down to 12fps it might not look so bad? Anyways I think it’s good for what it is, MAPPA is doing their best!

I barely noticed it. The animation looks BOMB. Top 5 episodes of the whole series for me and BEST action episode of AOT easily.

I'm always going to prefer 2D but I understand why they're using it. Still sad about what could've been if they were given enough time to work on the season. Definitely going to lower my expectations.

My dumbass wouldn't even notice, I just want to see the pretty people

I think the CGI for the Titans is completely fine. It's the CGI for the Scouts that was a bit off putting for me. Still, not enough to ruin the episode. And if we continue to get animation of this standard I will be fine with it. 

At this point after episode 7 onward eventually AOT CGI is going to be worst than EX-arm's CGI 

I love it because it makes the titans scarier and more eerie? I also miss the 2D ones because they feel more natural. Overall, I think it's fine!

I think the CGi is well executed (for the most part), I just don't like that they had to use it so much.

It's a great job. They manage to execute it very well and go to a normal animation when it's needed. It doesn't bother me tbh

HOW WAS EREN’S ROOFTOP SWAN DIVE? 309 Responses

Eren’s dive in the anime was a bit different than in the manga, but it seemed to get a few laughs out of the fandom, so we asked you all to rank it. 58.3% felt it was the most beautiful dive to have ever dived, while only 5.5% think Eren really needs to work on his form. He did his best.

WHICH RETURNING CHARACTER’S ENTRANCE WAS YOUR FAVORITE IN THIS EPISODE? 310 Responses

Mikasa stole the show this episode, with 53.5% enjoying her entrance the most. Levi wasn’t too far behind though, with 29% of respondents hyped over his return. 11.6% were very happy to see Sasha again, while smaller chunks were glad to see Jean and Connie.

They massacred my Jean-boy’s entrance 🥲

WHICH RETURNING CHARACTER HAS THE BEST MAPPA-STYLE GLOW UP? 304 Responses

We got a more colorful and evened out pie for this question. Overall the largest chunk, at 24.3%, are enjoying MAPPA’s take on Eren’s iconic “hobo chic” look. 21.1% think Sasha looks the best out of all of them, while Mikasa trails just behind her at 20.1%. 16.1% are grateful for Connie’s design, leaving 9.5% favoring Jean, and smaller handfuls appreciating MAPPA’s take on Levi and Floch.

Chubby Floch

Here I am watching the trailer all over again because that's probably the only way to see Jean animated handsome and with his actual manga face. MAPPA what happened?

Levi has a thicc ass

I’m a big fan of all the time skip character designs, it was hard to pick just one favourite :) 

Jean looked stupid... Floch too but that's not important.

OG characters designs feels a bit off to me. I understand why they use CG for some parts and I have mixed emotions about it. I hope they won't rely on it too much on the upcoming episodes.

#ITSTIMEMIKASA WAS TRENDING ON TWITTER BEFORE THE EPISODE AIRED. ON A SCALE OF 1-5, HOW MUCH DID IT LIVE UP TO THE HYPE? 304 Responses

One of the most anticipated scenes of the Marley arc was the return of the Survey Corps and the way Mikasa paves the path for their reintroduction. The fandom appears to be very happy with MAPPA’s execution of the scene, with 60.9% of respondents rating it with a 5, with 27% rating it a 4. 

EEEEEEEEEEK MIKASA

Mikasa! Mikasa! Gosh love her!

im so glad mikasa is back owfejgrnrkdfs

MAPPA INCLUDED FILLER AT THE BEGINNING OF THE EPISODE OF WILLY HESITANTLY DEPARTING FROM HIS TEARFUL FAMILY. WHAT DID YOU THINK OF THE ADDITION? 310 Responses

The series isn’t known for having too much filler, but typically what filler does exist seems to be appreciated by the fandom, and this was no exception. 56.8% of respondents were happy for a little more fleshing out of Willy’s character (also learning that those kids were his!) and being able to sympathize more with him. 19.7% appreciated the more sympathetic addition until they remembered he was willing to throw Liberio under the bus for his plan. 13.5% are appreciative of any and all additional Willy content. A small amount didn’t like the filler and would rather have had MAPPA put their effort into other things. 

I liked it. Got to see more of his fine ass. lmao

Don't add extra 2d animation if You can't even handle what's in the manga

It would've been better to show before he was dead. Fleshing him out after the audience already know he's dead doesn't hit as much imo

Wasn't one of the scene itself, but then again I'm always interested in scenes I haven't seen yet.

I am so grateful, willy for is one of my favourites and omg we got to see his family and how is he a lovely papa 😭💕 I can't ask for more bless you MAPPA🤘

fuck them kids

Why should we feel bad for him? He tried to unite the world against Paradis. He got what he deserved.

this was a benefit. as manga readers, we had time to know willy. anime onlies will only ever have these 2-3 episodes and it was very humanizing

How is that possible that Tybur little kids in few seconds were louder nad more chaotic than THE WHOLE CITY DURING THE ATTACK??

It's very regrettable he left so many children fatherless because of what he chose to do. Really saddening..

I’d have rather seen more of the manga animated 

I knew why they added it, but I (personally) think willy is crud. Not mad it's there tho!

He did his duty as a Tybur to the very end. Honestly I wish he could have lived longer, he’s a really compelling and interesting character.

I feel like some viewers have carelessly misunderstood Willy because of that scene in the carriage. They're like 'wow, he really hates and shames his own people huh?' but at the beginning of the episode we all saw his abundance of children. Would it not have been extremely contradictory if he had truly wanted the extinction of all Eldians and then at the same time did the complete opposite by mass-reproducing a small army of Eldian children? Maybe that's why that scene was added to the start of the episode, to keep people away from mischaracterising him. Unfortunately, this may have simply been missed or overlooked by some. 

they should had polish the damn episode instead of fillers.

Loved it! Mappa is killing it with the episode additions 

Reading the manga, I truly didn't even consider the possibility that these were Willy's children because he is so obviously a ~*bachelor*~. Like, it didn't even cross my mind that those children weren't his little nieces and nephews because he is suuuuch a Theater Gay. Nothing can change my mind.

Wait a minute, are these the kids in that ending slide from season 3?

IN THE ORIGINAL CHAPTER 101, MAGATH IS THE ONE WHO ADVOCATES FOR KILLING EREN INSTEAD OF EATING HIM (IN CONTRAST TO HIS SUBORDINATE KOSLOW) AND NOTES THAT “THE AGE OF TITANS IS OVER.” IN THE ADAPTATION, MAGATH INSTEAD ADVOCATES FOR EATING EREN, NOTING THAT KILLING HIM WOULD ONLY PROLONG THE PROBLEM. HOW DO YOU FEEL ABOUT THE CHANGE? 305 Responses

A minor dialogue change didn’t seem to have much of an effect on nearly half of respondents, with 47.5% saying they’re indifferent to the change. 43.3% like the change much better, feeling that it works a lot better with future story developments and makes more sense. A handful didn’t care for the change and felt it tampered with Magath’s overall characterization. 

I think the change was logical and more consistent with the story, but I'm naturally skeptical of any AOT manga-to-anime change.

I forgot this.

It ovewrites the flaw of Magath's original plan. Even if I think its unfitting of him, it makes sense.

I'm not sure what I feel about it. Kinda like how they added Falco having a dream back in episode 1. For now, let's just see.

I suppose the new change is a little contradictory because Magath dislikes Marley’s reliance on Titan power and rather just wishes th ey had prowess in other ways. 

Realistically eating him makes more sense for them to eat Eren so they gain control of the Founder but I think Magath accepting the age of Titans is now done for is more in character.

It obviously makes more sense logistically, but I think it's important for Magath to stand opposed to Marley national policy on this front, like, symbolically.

BETWEEN UDO AND ZOFIA, WHO WOULD YOU HAVE LIKED TO SURVIVE TO RECEIVE MORE STORY IN THE MANGA? 304 Responses

Though they are minor characters, the anime seems to have made some of the fandom a bit more fond of them. Still, 38.5% wouldn’t change anything about their fates, stating that they were necessary for Gabi to develop further as a character. 28% would rather neither of them died and are curious about how they would have developed if they lived to see another day. 23.7% say if they had to pick only one of them, it would be Udo due to his relevant commentary. A handful leaned toward Zofia, wishing they could have learned more about her. 

Udo. But at the same time Isayama can barely handle all the characters that are still alive so Udo probably wouldn't get a lot of screen time anyway.

Zofia. I didn't care about her while reading the manga, but in the anime she was more unique. I liked her stoic voice a lot. Zofia and Gabi should have switch the places. 

None cus i don't like Gabi

Both or neither. One would be just a third wheel to Gabi and Falco. I would love to see more of Udo and Zofia but I think their deaths were important

Udo and zofia's deaths hurt so bad. I didn't particularly care for either of them when reading the manga but i grown attracted to them in the anime. Udo's in particular breaks me. He was such a energic kid and he... got trampled to death. I'm just...

Neither. Both were serving an enemy nation and deserved what they got.

They weren't important to me so I don't really care

OPINION ON HOW THE ATTACK ON LIBERIO WAS PORTRAYED? 306 Responses

47.1% of respondents didn’t want to pick sides, stating that the attack was tragic in both mediums of the story-telling. 25.8% felt that it was much more devastating in animated form alongside the sound, music and voice acting. 18.3% felt a bigger impact while reading the manga. 

Both versions are devastating, but Manga hit harder bc I just was so confused and couldn't stop trying to figure out wtf Eren was doing and why. Watching it knowing what I know made it somehow more devastating and yet also more palatable (bc I have a better understanding.)

It was more devastating in the manga. Especially Udo's death scene 

I think I have to wait until the battle is over. So far it's alright.

Loved it

It gave me more emotions in the manga. 

They got what they deserved

It was far more devastating in trailer 🙄

WE FINALLY HAVE A NAME FOR LADY TYBUR - LARA! THOUGHTS? 307 Responses

One of the few characters left with no name after the large guidebook released a few years ago, Lady Tybur was all we could call her (aside from fan-given names). Now she has an official name! 26.7% found it neat that we finally got this official detail. 25.4% feel that now they can finally sleep at night. 17.6% are forever grateful for the name drop and hated waiting so long for it. 15.3% don’t care at all and 11.7% feel this confirms that Isayama is a fan of Tomb Raider.

Not what I was expecting and wasn't expecting her to get a name. At least people can stop calling her Emma or those other dumbass meme names.

Cool. Next up: names for the Blouse kids, right? Right right?

I'm not kidding when I say I literally jumped up and screeched "SHE HAS A NAME!!!"

she didn't need it. she was the mysterious lady t. 

Lara was more lucky than Traute, who got more panels in the manga but her name was mentioned only in the guidebook. 

Still died

WHICH SCENE FROM THE PREVIEW ARE YOU MOST LOOKING FORWARD TO? 306 Responses

Of all the shots in the preview, 45.1% of respondents were most looking forward to Levi’s staged attack on Zeke. 17% favored seeing Mikasa assist Eren, 15% were most looking forward to seeing Falco emerge from the basement to see the carnage outside. 10.1% were stoked to see Pieck enter the battlefield. The episode has aired as of the publishing of these poll results - we hope these scenes lived up to the hype (even though we guessed one wrong lol).

ADDITIONAL THOUGHTS ON THE EPISODE?

I enjoyed the episode very much. I felt that the CGI was handled fairly well given the time restraints. However, there were a few instances where it was a bit jarring like Eren eating Willy, Eren pulling the WHT's cord, Mikasa landing on Eren, and Jean climbing up on the roof. Also some of the CGI models looked a bit weird for the scouts. I'm hoping some of these issues can be improved on in the Blue-ray version. Overall, these issues were noticeable but didn't take too much away from my enjoyment of the episode.

As much as I don't like the CGI, episode was great.

Just that it was fantastic and I can't wait for the next one!

The music is top notch. I love it. Especially the new version of XL TT near the end

After re-visiting the trailer we got for this season, it's just....saddening. Everyone was wondering how Mappa was gonna animate AoT and after seeing that trailer, all that effort by the animators, I thought "it's in good hands!". Now that we're getting the episodes and it's underwhelming. I don't blame the Mappa animators at all and cgi is unavoidable at some moments. But whoever are the higher ups who said "animate this in the shortest amount of time" ARE the assholes. It's so upsetting for this anime and the workers of it to be brought down like this :'(

Continuing to enjoy the pictures on the page come to life in the anime.

It was pretty amazing, I was waiting for so long to see this part animated! Aaand I'm so happy I got to see again the scouts! (expecially Connie, my personal fav)

Erwin should had lived instead of Armin, so Erwin can nuke Marley dropping from a blimp

I really liked it! I don't understand all the critics about the animation. It looks really neat and smooth

the SC backlit in that final scene was sickkkkk

It was different from the manga, but all the differences just improved the storytelling and fleshed out the people in Marley. Well done, MAPPA!

aaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!

I’m just grateful Mappa actually gives a shit about adapting the story properly. That alone makes this season a 9/10 for me cause that’s rare to see in the anime industry these days.

THE OST WAS FIRE

Gabi's voice acting was amazing this episode ! Also, it feels good to hear the ODM gear sound effect again. The CGI didn't keep me from enjoying the fight, we got awesome camera movements and good choreography, I'm very hopeful for next episode ! Also best boy Onyankopon might appear soon ?

I seriously do not know why people are complaining. It was amazing! Can't wait for the next episodes, it's going to be action-packed and intense!

I don't know if I liked the episode or not. I usually prefer manga so even episodes I like I prefer their manga versions but there is something in off with the episode and usually, Titans fight are more excited but this one Nah it was not at all. War hammer was great in animation it served a better understanding of its powers but the fight, in general, was like boring?? idk maybe because I am a manga reader so the titan power/character's introduction was not as thrilling as they were when I've read the chapters. anyways, there is still more of the attack on liberio in the next episode so I'll give my final thought when we conclude the arc

I really enjoyed and the CGI doesn't bother me.

I think the reason Attack Titan looks a bit off is it looks a bit thinner! Warhammer looks amazing because it's a true copy of the manga. If Attack Titan was a bit buff, I think nobody would have that much of a problem. Overall the chapter is amazing!

as much as i adored everything else i must admit... what is wrong with the character design? what happened to everyone's jaws?? i think jean, mikasa and pieck were the worst drawn. in the manga, they look flawless. 

I just hope we would get actual discussions in the sub instead of circle jerking or bitching about the cgi/ost etc.

The soundtrack was epic as hell

Mappa is doing a good job, with the little time they had. But sadly, they had the capacity to do way better and I will always regret this situation. And the Jojo memes on Mikasa are on point: in that specific panel, she looks ugly and unlike her cute face in the manga. For the rest of the episode, she's well portrayed

I think this episode is a taste of what is to come. It’s one thing to read still, silent pictures of complete devastation, and it’s another thing to hear the explosions, the screaming and crying. Seeing the blood painted red instead of black and white. When Eren rumbles the world, more people will realize how evil it is, how completely irredeemable. Less people will be #teameren once they get to see it in the anime. I can’t wait to see what MAPPA has in store.

So many nice details in the battle that weren’t there in the manga, the war hammer animation was particularly great

I feel bad complaining, but this was the first episode of the season that has disappointed me at all. Every other episode I feel has elevated the manga. I don't want (and never expected) to be that person, but the CGI, especially on the humans (WHY??) was so awkward it was distracting. We also lost a little bit of expressiveness from Eren, which is kind of a big deal when there's so little from him to begin with. 

Soundtrack was lit!!!!

It is what it is. But after I finished the episode I went back to watch the trailer and got sad that the season just isn't going to look like that. It's not bad by any means and I understand that these are people, not robots working on this with an extremely tight schedule. This entitled fanbase is super embarrassing with it's behavior and harassment of the people working on it. I kind of hope the final arc doesn't get animated now because these people don't deserve it. 

Awesome! I was a bit distracted how the pacing was, cutting a bit weirdly from one episode to another, but I really enjoyed it!

That closeup of Eren's Titan after he nom'd Willy is NUTS. 

It was emotionless and almost boring. The sound director keeps fucking up big time. I didnt feel anything close to the hype I felt watching the Armored/Colossal reveal animated. There were no exciting goosebumps, or tears. Nothing. Also the CGI was terrible. There were good things, but I expected much more for suck a climatic episode

It was a good episode after all, graphic was ok but i think that if they continued with the same titan 2d animation of first episodes and maybe changed a bit some sound it would have been waaay better. Still a good episode imho

The episode was very average. I'm not trying to complain, I know that the anime is mostly for anime-onlines, while we have a manga, but I expected better. I imagined the titan fight to be smooth, but in reality both - WHT and AT - moved like two, fat elephants. In the manga I felt that WHT was fast like a wind. In the anime Lara was slow, she looked like she had a hard time to even hold her hammer. The moment between Eren and Mikasa was disappointing. In the anime when Mikasa was upset about Eren's actions, he was completely unfeeling, while in the manga we see him being full of emotions and almost crying. I know he will turn into a cold bastard but MAPPA shouldn't dehumanize Eren so much now. I was surprised by Connie's glow up. MAPPA has done better job with him. In the manga he still looks like a kid, while MAPPA made him more mature-looking and masculine. That's good for underrated Connie. I'm grateful for the scene between Willy and his children. This way he feels more sympathetic and isn't ""just a guy who declared a war and was eaten by Eren"". 

I really like how the warriors and Marleyans seem to be getting a somewhat equal amount of screen time as the scouts have gotten after they've come into the picture. I hope this helps to make clear for the anime-onlies that understanding the experiences, emotions and the development of the other side is just as important as understanding those of the scouts/Paradis.

WHERE DO YOU PRIMARILY DISCUSS THE SERIES? 279 Responses

Thank you again to everyone who participated!

[who-ever-said-i-was-nice]

Mtach up thing please! <3

Female, INFJ-T, Sagittarius. 155cm (tiny potato, just dont smash it on my face or I will get insecure)I would never, brown eyes, long light brown hair, pale with freckless. Average-skinny. Wear glasses for study/work which is basically 24/7 same and have some tattoos here and there.

I think Im more of an ambivert but more close to the introvert side. I’m smiley but still people tend to tell me that they thought I was rude (or directly a bitch) highly doubt it they just jealous but found out I’m not that bad, guess that’s on bitch resting face :( nope :) better. Socially awkward but after I get comfortable I fool around a lot, memes and vine references give me life. I tend to do the opposite of what I’ve been told just because I don’t like it when people order me things.pffff can relate Tho I’m shy I will not hesitate to step up if someone is being rude with someone specially if is towards a friend or someone close to me. I try to be very caring and supportive for anything you will need but also empathic, I cry if someone cries kjdfhgk but try to hold it together so I can help and not make feel worse the other person you seem very nice pls be my friend

I’m sensitive, I get stressed and anxious easily and for that I constantly have headaches and stomach ache,noooooo :( I have a whole self-care routine to help me with that or else I will, without a doubt ,get sick. I don’t like places that are too crowded or very loud noises, it makes me nervous. I’m your “will cry if gets too anxious” person. yup you are to innocent and cute to be my friend I’m either “Mama bear” scary or “will murder you in your sleep” scary.....I’m just a marshmallow tho

I like reading welcome to the bookworm club, learning random things. I love art in general, music, painting, dancing, etc. I love animals too! All of them, cats, dogs, birds, frogs, please let them all in(but my weak spot are cats, I cant deny it). I’m vegan, try to make it the most healthy possible (eating well, taking vitamin D and B12 to not die that was funnier than all of my jokes combined i died ). Sugar is my passion and my minimum 4 tsp of sugar per coffee knows it(this is where the I eAt HeAlThYy goes to hell xD damn right lmao, you still healthier then me). When it comes to music I like a bit of everything, I will be listening alternative rock or metal and then jump to kpop, tho I’ve been into chill lofi lately, specially when is mix of a series or movie cause nostalgia hits hard and I’m into that shit kjhjk I also have a playlist of Disney, anime or movie songs/soundtracks because it helps me to study or work more motivated, your girl needs motivation to not stare into space for 1 hour straight,kjkiijjioh same tho Im quite disperse, I always forget where I put things and then blame the goblins for that, but it turns out, it was on my hand all the time lollol

I study art online, I want to be a concept or background artist for animation, I used to study animation on a university but dropped because the pressure was too much and never could get along with the university itself, every week was a fight about something (Im not problematic I swear, I try to be the most chill out-care free possible but I swear the system is horrible here :( )yeah it happens sucks that you had to go through it. I’m also learning complimentary therapies! (I think that’s how it is on english) Reiki, tarot, pendulum, past lifes and such, Im into esoterical/”mystical” things.

For hobbies I do embroidery, sewing, read, stare into space for 1 hour and yoga (this is part of the self care routine to not die).

My favorite season is autumn or early spring, I dont handle too hot weather or the sun well, I like winter and rainy days but then I get so cold that I invernate on bed the whole day.

For relationships I think communication is key, I know is not easy but is the only way to make it work :( and cuddles, please cuddle me and pet my head, I will be on your palms if you scratch my head. I can be very touchy, like holding hands and hugs but I dont like it if someone who is not a very close friend or my partner does it, I just dont know how to react or do kfdhlk I prefer my personal space untouched :(  Im so sorry it was so long!! I wanted to do it very detailed but sHoRt to not make you think so hard with who match up me but maybe tmi is just the opposite for you, if so Im truly sorry! :( I think you are an angel just for trying to match up me with someone <3 ahhh, yes, the matchup (take a shot for everytime i said match up on this paragraph game) for ikevamp please! <3

4 shots huh.Ahahahahhahhhahahhahahhhah...... Don’t worry about the length. The longer the better right. Right? I’m nasty I’ll stop. Also yes I went through it and left little notes within the text. Why, because I’m cool. Hopefully. One day. Anyway!

I matched you with...............

                                        .......................ISAAC!!!!!

My sweet baby angel little boy

Isaac is very,very shy so it took him some time to warm up to you

but that does not mean that he didn’t like you

oh no no no

on the contrary

Isaac died every single time you passed him

he didn’t understand how someone could be so perfect

you took his breath away

him not being the tales man actually liked that you were shorter then him

you see, because men are supposed t be tall and strong and all that crap, plus being around Leo, who scores a 10 in all of those, made him quite insecure about his, well, actually everything

the way he talked, or rather didn’t, his height, that fact that he wasn’t jacked like some of the guys in the mansion, or, you know, at least in his mind

he isn’t exactly the fighter type either

he’s a scientist after all, not a worrier

and this made him feel like he didn’t deserve you, because he couldn’t protect you

 oh my, sweetheart no

you on the other hand, think he is amazing

I mean not all people know all the constellations name and position by heart, nor can they carve amazingly cute wooden toys and decorations, nor are the university professores and just so happen to be an absolute physics geniuses so yeah

both of you being quite reserved, it took you ages to get together

but when you did it was the most amazing thing ever

he confessed to you one night while you where stargazing

it went a little something like this:

You: Thank you for bringing me out. It’s so beautiful!

Isaac: Yes. Like you.

You: *eyes emoji*

Isaac takes your hand, blushes hard, and even though he wanted to look into your eyes he couldn’t bring himself to, in fear of loosing himself in them

“Y/n ever since I first laid eyes on you I knew that I needed you in my life. You make me feel so comfortable by the just being here with me. You are funny, lighthearted and so welcoming and accepting. I love when you sit next to me in the library, I love it when we stargaze, I love how you ask me oh so many questions. How you are so eager to learn everything. Yet you are so quiet and shy. It’s amazing really. and in those moments I fell like I love it even more. The comfortable silence we can both sit in. The look we share, were we somehow always know what the other is thinking without even asking. I love your hair falls and frames your face perfectly. Those adorable freckles are driving me mad you know? Your petite features always astound me. So small yet so pretty. How is it even possible? However I don’t expect you to reciprocate my feelings. It doesn’t matter how much I adore you, I can’t protect you. I am not what a man is supposed to be. I’m not strong and tough Y/n, I’m just a scientist. However I felt the need to tell you this. To tell you my true feeling. I love you Y/N. I really do.”

Isaac sat there with tears streaming down his face

he couldn’t look at you

he just waited for the rejection to slap him in the face

however it didn’t come

you cupped his wet cheek gently and he looked up to see your tear stained face

you slowly pull him towards you and kiss him

it was so gentle and full of love

you pulled away tears still pouring down your faces

however these weren’t tears of sadness, but of joy

you both laughed as Isaac pulled you into a hug

well.....

i may or may not be crying writing this

yes I definitely am that is totally the case

anywhoo

after this it is smooth sailing

cutest couple ever

And that is it! Sorry if this is lame and it literally took forever. Thank you for the request though.! Have an amazing day and be safe!

[chopstickchild]

ok i need to rant for a bit (read at your own risk)

also tw for body image issues

for a bit of background, i do ballet, and im pretty damn serious about it. as in its the centre of my life and i plan to make a career of it.

well my mom is rly supportive about this, but sometimes she gets to be a bit too much. as in extremely insensitive about how her « helping me » makes me feel. the subject of obsession tends to be something important, or some milestone, such as a performance, competition, or audition. in this case it’s two audition videos: one for a prestigious international competition (which could change my life if i got in), and the other video is an audition video for my dream school (and again, life changing if i get in).

These two videos are EXTREMELY important, and we wanted everything to be as perfect as possible, but the focus on perfectionism is where the problem lies. i’ve gotten better about not dragging myself down over every single detail, but my mom on the hand has not. she doesn’t obsess over my dancing (i do that enough already) but over details like lighting, camera angle, the line my leotard makes, my shoe color, my bun angle, the amount of makeup, the video quality, etc. she has a really good eye for those sort of things since she used to be an artist (and majored in fine art), and if she was the one filming my videos there would be no problem there.

But evidently there is a problem (which is why i’m writing this all out cause istg if i don’t i WILL lose it). Actually there’s two, one per video, though the second problem has nothing much to do with everything mentioned before.

The first issue is something that’s been haunting me for two weeks, and not in the good halloween haunting way. The video for the competition was filmed over the course of a few weeks by one of my teachers, and she and my mom have an *interesting* relationship. as in ive learned to brush off my mom cussing her out in car rides or at home (which happened today twice lol). My teacher wouldn’t allow my mom to be in the studio to help with lighting, camera angle, etc., saying that the studio wouldn’t allow more than two people in at a time (a lie, cause when we went with my contemporary teacher for one section of the video my mom was able to go in and film that portion). My teacher is a really well intention person by the way, but since my mom is so similar to how her mom was, being in her prescence triggers her which i think may be why she tried to make it so she wouldn’t have to interact with her as much.

So anyways my teacher and i worked on the audition video and we finally completed it, but the way she filmed it was not up to my moms standards. so we filmed it again. and right now it’s STILL not up to my mom’s standards, but at this point there’s literally nothing we can do. the deadline is in a few days and there’s no way we can refilm it then. in terms of my dancing, i feel pretty satisfied, though it’s not perfect, but i feel ok sending it in. but for thé past few weeks i’ve been constantly hearing how the video isn’t good enough, and how it doesn’t present me well enough, and if my mom could just have filmed the barre and centre i would look so much better. and that if i really want to catch the judges eyes then the video quality would need to be better. and i argue back at that point, saying my dancing should be enough to do that, and that i’m not auditoning for a film school but for a DANCE competition. and i know my mom has a point. we are drawn to things well presented, even if the content may not be the best. but after hearing that my video is not up to par for WEEKS it hurts a lot. and if i ask her to stop focusing so much on that because at this point all that is doing is making us feel unsatisfied with something unchangable, i’m ignored and she goes on saying i don’t understand her point. I’m also told that she’s saying all this because she cares so much and wants me to succeed. and that is all true, but i don’t CARE that she’s saying all this because she wants to help me with my goal. there are so many more productive things to do than fixating on unchangable shit, and there’s a voice inside telling me that if she really cared about me, the real actual me and not the dancer side of me, she would take a moment to understand how much certain things she says hurts. no matter the intentions behind, no matter that she always adds that my dancing wasn’t the problem and that it was all my teachers fault (which also pokes me in a different way), i ALWAYS leave that conversation with an extremely tight knot in my chest and a bunch of self doubt. sometimes when the convo evolves into an argument, my mom tells me that it’s cause she’s stressed about this and the video and because she cares so much, but i’ve reached the point where i don’t give a fuck. i’m stressed too, and i care a TON. i sacrificed so fucking much for this (not to say she hasn’t like good lord i worry so much about her sometimes) but being stressed and caring about something does not excuse harping on about something someone has EXPLICITLY told you to please stop going on a bout and try to let go of. multiple times. which is why i really want to scream sometimes, and why i decided to just let it out here. (it’s worked by the way. as of right now the knot inside has loosened and the negative energy about this problem has almost dissolved, which why i’m now moving on to the second issue)

ISSUE NO. 2- thé audition video for my dream school. now this is a different direction than the other video problem because this video hasn’t been filmed yet. so i should start out with saying that as a by product of doing ballet, i have body image issues. it got worse over the course of the past year because i put on a few pounds. and i know that honestly, i shouldn’t worry too much, but doing an art form where your body is constantly critiques in so many ways kinda has a way of making you always wish it was better. now my mom knows about how i feel about my body, and in the past she has completely invalidated my feelings if i try to talk about it (because in her eyes i’m perfect yaddayaddayadda and i’m just manifesting these insecurities out of nowhere cause i have nothing to be worried about). the thing is tho (and i’m pretty thankful for this) is that she will tell me if i’ve gained weight, and she will help me if i want to lose some and stuff. so it’s like she has this weird mix of telling me to not worry about my weight cause i’m perfectly fine, but also telling me that i need to watch what i eat more and that i need to lose a little weight. and i hate it so much. recently i just stopped weighing myself every morning cause i realized i was literally basing how i felt the whole day off the number on the scale. and honestly i’m so much happier now cause i stopped. everything is the same except that one thing, and i have no intention to start obsessively weighing myself again.

And that brings me to issue two. because we were talking about the video for the school, and my mom said “you need to start weighing yourself every morning again”. well i saw every single color of the rainbow when she said that, and i was enraged. because my instinct was to be angry in order to protect one of my biggest insecurities, my body. the implications that came from telling me i needed to start weighing myself more HURT, and thinking about it right now is making me almost cry. and her saying that also pissed me off SO MUCH. because my mom KNOWS how i feel about my body, about my weight, and my eating habits. i have explicitly stated MANY time that i would prefer if she would not make those little comments about those subjects, and i have let her know how much it hurts me. i don’t think she understood that though, despite the amount of times i’ve completely shut down or started crying. but that one comment is hanging over my head right now, acting as a smoke cloud twisting around my heart and making me have some rlly self deprecating thoughts. and so tomorrow morning if she asks me what my weight is i don’t know what i’ll do. i’m considering just saying something above what ik she wants it to be, no matter what i may actually be, but i’ve also considered just tossing the scale in the rubbish bin. actually won’t do that though cause i would get in a ton of trouble lol. but a problem is that as a result of her comment, i’ve also begun considering starving myself, of making myself throw up, and other unhealthy ways to lose weight because right now, i feel like my body is too fat filled, too squishy for ballet. which is bullshit but the negative voice is drowning the positive one out now.

ok i have gotten all the rant energy out now, and no longer feel like punching a wall, cry screaming, cussing out the next person i see, or any assortment of high negative energy release techniques that would hurt others or myself. if you read this far, props to you cause i sure as hell would not have been able to make it thru that 😂.

also i should add that my mom and i are SUPER close and she honestly a great person in every aspect except certain dance related stuff. i really really appreciate everything she has done for me, all her sacrifices and all the effort she has put in to make sure i am where i am now. it’s just sometimes i feel like she forgets that i’m a person with feelings about topics, not just a dancer. thank you for coming to my tedtalk 😌

[taylornock]

how cell phones made our lives better while simultaneously ruining them

hi fam!! it’s me, again. are you tired of hearing from me? me too. that’s why I’m here to rant about social media / phone / technology. bc i hate it… but in a loving way???

everyone remembers when they got their first iPhone. seriously. why is that such a monumental moment in our lives? i can hardly remember what i felt like freshman year of high school but can pinpoint the feeling of sheer glee unwrapping my iPhone 6 in eighth grade. i have this thing that is attached to me 24/7 - when I go anywhere (even downstairs) without my phone i feel weird. that is f***ing SAD! PATHETIC. i hate feeling that dependent on what is essentially a pocket robot.

for what it’s worth - phones have done INCREDIBLE things for the world as we know it. for example, this quarantine shit has been testing all of us; and our phones are helping us get through it in so many ways. our phones let us see the faces of those loved ones we are missing, our phones provide us with stupid tik tok content to keep everything light hearted, and our phones let us check in on each other. all amazing things! when we are at school, we have instant access to our lives at home . being able to call my mom whenever i want is something i definitely abuse. “mom, I’m on my way home from Thompson right now and i think i have a brain aneurysm but my bio final is at 11am tomorrow will i make it” … an actual conversation i had with my mom at the end of freshman year. needless to say i was medicated shortly after THAT meltdown. I am such a brat that i don’t know what i would do if i couldn’t text my dad and have him immediately get me the password again to our Uverse account…… god forbid i miss an episode of the bachelor. i have this phone, and that’s what i do with it? abuse its powers to ask my parents for medical advice or a password i forgot? have we lost sight of everything here?

throughout life and especially throughout quarantine… my phone is the definition of a possession that is a blessing and a curse. I’m so grateful to have the ability to bother my friends - whenever i want! the options are endless! i love keeping in touch with people i thought id never hear from again, and being able to talk to so many people in my life and make my heart swell. now, when a conversation with someone other than my two roommates (shoutout parents) is so rare ⎯ that phone is my weapon and i use it to help flatten the curve: flatten the curve of covid19 and flatten the curve of my mental illness 🙃 [humor is a coping mechanism okay let me live] but like, i KNOW i’m not the only one that looks at my screen time and immediately wants to die. how can i honestly be looking at my phone for that long? picking it up THAT many times?????? my phone is the best distraction and also the most toxic - it makes me feel better but has a tendency to bring up all my issues and blast them into the reflection of my blue light glasses...... its called fashion look it up.

to give some examples - let’s open up my most used app: snapchat. I go on snapchat with the best of intentions - to see a memory from a year ago that makes me smile. to respond to my friends and see what their mood today is based on the look on their face. to creep on snap stories and see what everyone’s cooking and doing with their lives. somehow, tho, after spending a few minutes on the app.. i end up with a pit in my stomach most of the time. the person i want to respond hasn’t responded in 4 hours. oh god lets overthink this- they don’t like me anymore and are no longer interested in speaking to me and only respond every once in a while out of pity or because they are uncomfortable. everyone hates you. oh and GOD FORBID someone leaves me on open??! I am not funny nor interesting nor worth a reply - suddenly, i have equated my value to receiving or not receiving a photo of someone’s blank stare. this is extreme, and this is dramatic. but trust me —— this is the hamster wheel always turning in my head. I’m not even going to touch on snap maps; that feature is pandoras box and someone better fucking shut it.

second most used app is instagram. i scroll for hours, i have time limits set for the app acting like i’m actually going to listen to them and get off. lmaooooooooo. i love looking at aesthetic stuff and dogs and food and recipes and my friends’ beautiful faces. but you know what i don’t like? constant nudges to compare myself to others. oh look at her having a party with all of her friends even though we aren’t supposed to be. am i a loser for trying to be safe? oh look at her washboard abs, i’m never going to look like that and will never live up to the standard of beauty society has set for me. look at all of these people in their happy relationships. why can’t i have that? it goes over and over and over. its not like i sit there and think of these things just like that, its a precedent in my mind when i stare at everybody else that i am going to size my own life up against theirs. for years i followed every single elite model / VS angel on instagram to motivate me to do better - to start being psycho about what i did to my body so i could be as gorgeous as them. what kind of fucked up mindset is that? i would literally watch their footage of them eating rice and vegetables once a day and try to copy it. i would watch their runway walks obsessively trying to recreate them in heels alone in my house - like that was all i could imagine doing with my life. did i ever stop for a second to look at that photoshoot of gigi hadid and wonder if she was happy? wonder if the constant pictures she saw of herself ever made her insecure? what was i doing? the day i unfollowed those girls was a monumental day in my journey to a better self image. i didn’t realize the people i thought were my “motivators” were actually my triggers. i have grown to a point in life now that i would much rather eat a stack of chocolate chip pancakes that make me dance in my chair like an infant than practice my runway walk and shame my body in the mirror. and i am so freakin happy! 

i could go app by app for hours. but moving on to the next thing i hate about cell phones - how they have destroyed our biological methods of communication. you hear about those psychos who think the world is destroyed by technology and we are going to be overrun by robots. but hey, I’m with the psychos on this one. i have this amazing friend, Trevor Wright, who without fail at EVERY dinner announces ��phones off friends on” and collects our phones into the center of the table. yes, we are 20 year old adults. yes, we hand our phones over to Trevor and let him yell at us for trying to see if ~that person~ snap chatted us back. i have so much respect for him because of this. there is nothing worse than staring at your phones when you could be having a good conversation about life, about love, about laughter + memories, about “do you think hellen keller is real?” anything, bro, anything. anything but snapchat messaging your hoe of the week or mindlessly playing tetris to twiddle your thumbs. we all need to start loving a little harder, and the first step to doing that is to communicate better. communicate smarter. I’m guilty of alllll of the above, don’t get me wrong. and I am ADD asf and constantly playing mindless games just to stimulate my brain. but i need to stop that! even writing this is taking some time away from the dumb shit on my phone - and encouraging me to communicate how i     r e a l l y   feel to my homies that will read this. communication - especially body language - is fascinating. I’ve studied it in  psych, I’ve learned the neurological bases of behavior and why we do what we do. I’ve learned how much our life experience impacts who we are as a whole...and it! is! fascinating! i also think that’s why i love film so much. because it can capture the raw moments of your friends just being your friends, of you just being the person you are, and the world around you just existing as it exists. i love the raw moments; and not just because indy blue posted one youtube video of her slow mo laughing and now thats the only footage i find myself shooting. 😚

im not quite sure what this post is, lol. but - just a rant on technology. so listen to me:

take advantage of technology + social media! it CAN BE GREAT. for so many reasons. but, don’t let technology + social media TAKE ADVANTAGE OF YOU. stay true to you - know how to communicate with yourself and your loved ones without the use of a robot. remember that feeling when you setup up your first iPhone? imagine if you could feel that again, with your phone nowhere in sight. if you don’t know how to communicate with yourself yet, start by journaling. WRITE! TYPE! SPEAK! do what you want. getting your thoughts down even without an audience is so crucial to understanding yourself and others. if you don’t like to write, reflect. breathe. meditate. make art. do what makes you feel at peace, and do whatever makes you feel like the world makes a little bit more sense than it does. 

IF YOU ARE READING DOWN TO HERE, I LOVE YOU. I LOVE YOU, SAY IT BACK! LIFE IS A FUCKING HIGHWAY. AND IM SO GLAD YOU’RE ON MY INTERSTATE. <3

xoxoxoxo

gossip girl

[chococustard]

((I’m really sorry if I’m becoming too annoying with asks and all that!!! U don’t have to respond!!)) Kind of random, but out of curiosity, do you have any A/B/O AU family headcanons?? I honestly would LOVE to know more about all of them!! Thank you sm!!

!!! NOT AT ALL I ACTUALLY GET SUPER HAPPY WITH YOU LIKING THEM SO HUSH YOU’RE NEVER A BOTHER ASK WHATEVER YOU WANT

legit i have a shit ton of notes in my notebook with my horrible hand writing and basically nonsense notes and while writing the edited ver a) like the dingus i am i accidentally clicked a thing and lost all the answers b) the internet dies haaah

SO YEAH THERE’S A SHIT TON UNDER THE CUT

MIDORIYAs

mido worries about his mom getting overwhelmed by paparazzi so as a pro hero he doesn’t really give off his name to the public and the name midoriya kinda just fades over time

i’m guessing heroes give birth in secluded hospitals who won’t give off their info yeah? but mido’s location got leaked somehow and yu got kidnapped by villains which then todo fucks shit up and got her back so since then they’ve been kinda worried about safety and shit

inko stands in as guardian for school related stuff most often since todo and deku are mostly busy

idk why i kinda hc todo’s mom as an ice dancer or something (look at how that boy works with ice that does not come from endeavor) she used to take the kids to the ice rink and teaches them to skate. todo still holds that place as a safe space and goes to the one a few train stations away from campus after he gets his shit together. he took deku there for their date and ends up also taking the girls there too.

rei gets out at some point, as she gets used to being in society again she stays with inko (and all might//SHOT) at deku’s old room when he got a place with todo. she gets along with them and also mitsuki. they have tea together and share embarrassing stories about their kids it’s great

yu and tsumu plays mostly at tsumu’s house which was closer to the school, they hit it off super well and they even talk about each other to their families, todo and deku are super relieved to know their girl has another friend. yu actually met mirio and tamaki already but are not aware they know her parents

so tsumu one day just “hey you wanna come over for dinner we’re having bbq you should bring your family over!” and they do come over cause why not i guess and then the 2 families meet and damn

their balcony is filled with potted plants courtesy of inko. there’s also a small bottle with a single morning glory flower, wrapped in a blue ribbon and a duck cutout stuck into the dirt

no one uses watashi in the house, yu uses boku, chi uses ore, yu calls them oka-sama and otou-sama and generally uses more formal speech while chi uses the more common -san honorific, not sure if this is relevant of anything but yeah. also todo calls deku bunny from when they started courting (2nd year)

they have a thing with nicknames. obviously deku uses -chan, but also

BAKUGOUs

baku and kiri works as partners tho sometimes kiri helps out with the fatgum office, they have an office at home and basically a small gym

meat. so much meat. there’s always meat in the fridge

baku and kyou both eat with so much fucking spice and chilli kiri’s basically kinda used to it to a point. but if they have the girls over (like when deku’s in heat//SHOT) they have to have extra of the low impact portion. one time chi took the spicy portion by accident, apparently she’s immune

they’re an outdoor family basically. whenver they can they go mountain climbing when kyou is old enough. baku’s chili peppers kept getting stolen by animals, he tries every time to blow them up

baku and kiri dated and courted first, but deku and todo mated first cause of a quirk related accident. but then they got engaged and married first because baku is fucking petty.

baku’s parents fucking love kiri he’s a good boy he’s glad baku somehow ended up with someone so great. baku however have to holds himself back to be a good boy™ to kiri’s more traditional family. he managed somehow

when baku’s parents meet kiri’s they’re shocked to find how they find baku as a charming and wonderful young alpha and they’re glad their eijiro found someone who accepted him. SO MITSUKI OUT OF SPITE INVITES THEM A LOT AND BAKU HAS TO ENDURE SO MUCH SHIT

BAD NEWS FOR HIM CAUSE THEY GET ALONG

“MRS KIRISHIMA WOULD YOU LIKE TOO SEE KATSUKI’S BABY PICTURES?” BAKU, INTERNALLY DETONATES

baku ended up basically deaf so he has to learn sign language, kiri the ever supportive bf learns too, as well as their families, and they also thought it to kyou

friday nights are mario kart nights, no holds bar

the rest of the baku squad (and camie) often visits but since they converted the extra room to baku’s office and their couch isn’t all that big they have to sleep at mido’s place, or borrow their extra futon

kiri, when asked if he wants another kid, “holy shit no it was so hard to get my body back into shape ok and also how the heck do you even hold yourself as a hero not to save people IZUKU SOMEHOW DID IT MORE THAN ONCE IM STILL SHOCKED”

when kyou got his quirk he accidentally burned his bed, then screamed to dad and pop hOLY SHIT I GOT MY QUIRK

he was so proud of it at first and shows it off at schooltho when it's found out that he has little control with it, as lava often seeps through his skin and out of his mouth at random times, almost hurting the other kids, the at first popular kyou was feared by his peers, until yu got her quirk late in the year and was able to put out his lava whenever

"you're not scared of me? even before you got your quirk?" "why would i it's not like you did it on purpose" also like she's used to baku. that goes along for years until kyou presented. yu comes over after school with meds and stuff, but kyou, out of his mind and his body out of his control, attacked her, trapping her in a cascade of hot burning lava. she managed to escape with some mild burn and they kinda got awkward for a while. they're cool eventually

however when yu presented the fear of that happening again got way fucking worse

YAOYOROZUs

momo and kyouka wants to be independant yeah, so they got their own apartment (more of a penthouse if anything) with their own money

a note, dams are gender neutral pronouns for moms, sires for dads

itsu calls momo dad, kyouka mom

since he’s mute since birth, in addittion to sign language, as his interest with music grows they make a system for basic stuff he can make with notes and sequenses as answers where he’s unable to use signs

momo however also makes a list of codes for specific teas

he carries around at least a whistle or kazoo, mostly he uses a harmonica

momo’s parents worries at first about enrolling him into a normal school but momo and kyouka themselves are convident their kid can get along with the other kids

they right, even without his connection as their kid

is he a goth? not really, he just really likes the color black

he also like birds, he has a bunch of photos and encyclopedias of birds in his room

kyouka often holds charity concerts, momo and itsu always comes to support her

IIDAs

it surprised everyone when iida, the rule abiding iida, had ochako pregnant before they got married, so with the power of the iida family they got engaged and married so fucking quick

tho really it was an accident, ocha misscounted her birthcontrol pills during her heat and they’re already courting anyway and their familes are already aware of each other and get along well so whatever

HE WAS ALSO LATE FOR HIS BIRTH BECAUSE HE HAD TO FUCKING OBEY THE GODDAMN TRAFFIC LAW

also i need someone to get me like, you see iida and ura, they cute right, pure and soft. but holy shit when ocha’s in heat she takes no shit and is basically a goddamn dominatrix

they, deku and todo shares a hero agency, so basically when tenma was born they made a baby space for him in their shared office with toys and shit and the sidekicks can play with him, they’re putty in his chubby hands. same thing happened with the tododeku kids. the sidekicks are all okay with this

there’s not many support and rescue heroes, so ocha often gets called in as an instructor at ua, she brings tenma for lessons for her students to safe

tenma likes to hang around the future heroes, he likes to play hero

“senpai senpai do you need help!” “ooh ye see i think i accidentally blew my shoe way up that tree can you get it for me?” “YES!!”

he takes martial arts lessons as early as from 3 years old, as a teenager he’s able to fight midair

TOGATAs

so like not sure yet, tamaki’s either an omega or beta so tsumu is either theirs biologically or adopted so

either way if she’s their biological kid, during his heat tamaki used his quirk when doing the dirty so the genes stick and mutates and shit

aNYWAY

tamaki doesn’t really like making appearances on tv and in public, he even rarely sign for merch deals, tsumugi often finds knock off merch of him and she likes to get it as a kind of joke cause the design was actually kinda funny, mainly this actually

she also likes to find show cameos of him, that too was hilarious

she loves hanging out with aunt nejire they often go shopping, she’s the one who bought her the knock off suneater shirt

“lol you wanna know why your dad’s hero name is suneater?” “what?=D” “tha-” tamaki: NEJIRE I SWEAR TO GOD

also like mirio totally acts like the protective big bro to eri when someone likes her

she likes buff/big bodies, mostly to sleep on, she sleeps on mirio and mr fatgum

she has a bunch of miruko merch cause she’s a rabbit and has strong ass legs and she may or may not have a gay awakening cause of that

here is, in fact, said bootleg shirt

she likes the giant gaping mount

SHINSOUs

SHINSOU’S AN UNDERGROUND HERO FIGHT ME

he teaches the hero course and LIKE HIS DAMN DAD IS A LITTLE SHIT TO HIS CLASS

so he’s the one who changed the entrance exam to make it more fair for kids with quirks that are not flashy his, so the robots are then deligated to the recomendation exam kids while the regular ones gets a basically game of hide and seek with his hero buddies and the older students

i actually have this for his hero costume back from goddamn january i dont even know

i, i have nothing for fuyusei they met at the hospital and they hit it off and that’s….. it

i have even lESS SHIT FOR OJITOORU

ALSO LIKE I FUCKING LOVE THE IDEA THAT ALL MIGHT RUNS A VILLAIN REHAB FACILITY OR SOMETHING WITH ALL HIS MONEY, YOU KNOW, FROM BEATING VILLAINS TO SAVING VILLAINS, AND LIKE INKO HELPS WITH TALKING TO THEM IM WEAK

[blatherkatt]

i just started reading your blumenthal kids reunionfic and i LOVE IT! Its so good and so full of potential and angst and I LOVE IT!!!💞💞💞 The way you write Eodwulf is soooo good hes such a mess and so gay help him. and Astrid Omg... I cant wait for more of her i checked out some of your posts on here and shes just great??? You've clearly put a lot of thought into them with the child designs and stuff, did you have any major inspo for the two of them like songs or other characters and stuff???

hey tumblr dont…delete part of my answer what the heck

anyway!!! THANK YOU SO MUCH,,, ed ( @tactfulgrimalkin ) is the one doing the actual writing but we plan everything together and i edit and do artwork so he deserves lots of love for the great writing…i dont remember what else i had here before tumblr deleted it so i hope thats the gist of it 

eodwulf is a gay disaster of a bastard man and astrid is SO fun and im SO GLAD UR EXCITED TOO BECAUSE WE SURE ARE

anyway you just opened pandora’s box and i’m very sorry for the length of the rest of this answer but here we go prepare for some cursed content necessary to answer that question ( | ) w ( | ) it was a Wild Ride getting these two characters to where they are boy howdy 

so the thing is in order to explain how we created these characters i actually have to get into the origins of the fic on the whole because the two are inextricably linked, and also, the origins of this fic are incredibly cursed and you can send all ur hatemail right here go on blast us we’re ready 

but we were talking about caleb and how we’re both excited for whenever astrid and eodwulf turn up, and the thought came up for basically the rough skeleton of that scene in chapter 2: 

“hey how messed up would it be if instead of them both hunting him down like we’re expecting…one of them comes in with a huge savior complex and sincerely thinks he’s delusional and should still be in the asylum, how MESSED UP would that be” 

…and then shortly after that, this happened 

thats the cursed part dont say i didnt warn u but listen you know we’re right

also that pic of caduceus didnt exist back then i went back and got this screenshot just to share the curse with you all

ANYWAY

in classic us format we got carried away and eodwulf got slotted into the role of that scene in chapter two and his character was largely developed around that scene, like, what kind of person would still be clinging to caleb after all this time to that degree to make that happen? and what was come up with was an extremely avoidant person clinging to a fantasy version of things wherein they don’t have to fight

(eodwulf was developed into a Person before astrid, i should note at this point, and ed did most of that developing; i took point on astrid later on)

but around this time i went “screw it im gonna do some concept art we’re both in too deep now” so here’s some of that for u guys 

started with them all as teens and did a couple sketches as well as one of baby (well. teen. so baby) caleb/bren/we were calling him felix at the time as some of u probably already know 

first draft had astrid with longer hair than eodwulf lmao check this out 

flipped the hair length on those two which was for the best because at the time we were imagining eodwulf as a bit more mischevious which is another thing that got reversed over time now astrids the prankster and eodwulfs the overworked mom friend because bren takes astrid’s ideas and makes them SO MUCH WORSE but he still looks better with longer hair and then i played around w/ colors for a while and wound up w/ this

voila, the initial kid concepts, to which subtle yet vital changes were  made after time. if any of you are curious about if im frustrated that that’s still the best i’ve ever drawn eodwulf’s nose the answer is yes. yes i am. 

astrid’s hair is not messy enough, theres not enough freckles, and she does not look ready to fight the entire world for a dare. 0/10. 

anyway then i did adult versions which look WAY OFF NOW LMAO 

eodwulf with way too much beard, looking far too messy when he ought to look very clean so that he can hide how much of a disaster he actually is, and also a glimpse into the very boring Ice Queen/Heartless Bitch we vaguely had astrid as to start with. even more out of character tho is the earring, astrid as she is today would absolutely never tolerate an earring unless she absolutely had to, girl’s got sensory issues but she didn’t back then. ALSO STILL NOT ENOUGH FRECKLE 

anyWHO a while after this it was decided that eodwulf has ADHD, something both the authors have a whole lot of lmao, and that was the point where ed REALLY took off and developing eodwulf went out of control and we both went Well I Guess We’re Gonna Have To Write This At Some Point Now

and with that happening is when developing astrid took more priority i think, because man, at that point in the game she came way too close to that really  annoying trope that shows up in fanfic a lot wherein The Girl is A Bitch who is Getting In The Way Of ~*The Yaois*~ and thats like, thats bad. we knew from the outset we were absolutely not setting this up as a love triangle because we both hate those but even w/ her having no romantic relationship to either of the two, like…she was kind of just There and the one who was most loyal to trent (the only thing of her original characterization that really stuck, honestly) and sooo boring???? 

so like, and i say this honestly, i managed to COMPLETELY FORGET that “reverse sasuke” cursed comment from the beginning of all this and STILL go “well what if we made her more like caleb’s rival that’d be fun” 

and that’s how astrid sorta wound up accidentally morphing into the Scrappy Underdog of this anime trio and calling her a naruto analogue is extremely cursed but also not inaccurate tbh 

started out with the concept of her popping into bren’s window because she heard they were doing magic and wanted to learn it too and evolved from there; we decided that she was gonna be neurodivergent too but, hilariously, initially that she was “the best at pretending to be neurotypical” (WE COMPLETELY REVERSED THAT AND IT IS FOR THE BETTER. SHE’S SO MUCH MORE FUN NOW) and made her also autistic because it one meant she could be like SAME HAT at bren really hard which’d make her feel more like part of the group instead of just the odd one out, and two because it fits with the whole rivals thing

branching off of that we made her just. INCREDIBLY direct. like. astrid’s thought process is “how can i accomplish what i want accomplished with the smallest number of steps? what are the consequences of doing it this way? do i give a shit? no? im gonna do that.” 

(which is why she climbed a tree to get into bren’s attic instead of using the door because that way she just completely skipped having to convince his mom to let her in)

i cant get into it much here because so many spoilers and we’re gonna explore it all, but like, astrid’s backstory turned into this exploration of the intersection of sexism and ableism especially as applied to a medieval-esque society in which the word “autism” doesn’t even EXIST and in which a convenient double standard exists Right There in the form of bren and like,, its gonna be good guys im excited for it 

as far as characters tho she does also have just a touch of Vimes from discworld to her, albeit like, she’s lawful evil to his lawful good, but she’s got the same tendency to stick REALLY FIERCELY to the rules that she thinks are important, even when they inconvenience her, even if it’d be so much easier to bend them just this once 

and for songs i cannot link like any astrid songs because they all might accidentally give away so much BUT I CAN LINK AN EODWULF SONG 

this one was HUGE for him 

uhhhh i think that’s everything i can think of that we can say right now unfortunately so i’ll end this with a comparison to the current teen designs we have now that are being used in the actual fic, even tho im not fond of how bren came out in this picture, but like, for the sake of comparison 

lets see how far we’ve come 

I N C R E A S E    F R E C K L E 

[apprentice-nylah]

So since I didn’t catch that we finally got Book XXI - The World until now... I’m doing my usual first impressions of playing through and my thoughts. Since (I think?) this is the end of Nadia’s route, I believe I’ll do an overall thoughts in a different post later on when I’ve digested everything. 

Both my thoughts on the Upright ending and Reversed ending are under the cut. I play through Nadia’s route only. But this is a much longer than normal post. And it goes without saying, but a lot of spoilers under the cut. 

Upright Ending

- ITS FINALLY HERE?!?@?!??@~

- Backroom of the shop but in red... okie

- oh is this uhm.. when the apprentice first got revived? 

- snow

- oh what did nadia legit visit the apprentice when.. wait... 

- okay so basically you can only pick “youve come to the right place!” even though theres an option for “wait this isn’t right.”

- YoU’Re hEr FiAnCe!!!

- NO YOURE PERFECT FOR HER

- is it going to be the fool card???

- ok the high priestess, I can accept that

- THE LOVE OF MY LIFE (can you hear me screaming irl) 

- this is all the devils fault so “the devil will pay for this”

- aw nadia gushing about the apprentice is so cute

- “I’ll always find you.” fuck ye

- uhm.. apprentice wise probably “id turn into a phoenix.” 

- lived on the moon.. “i’d live there too.” 

- it was cheesy but u loved it anyway

- im actually squealing irl about nadia

- winkie sprite again ;0

- back where it started then eh

- “it has no power” 

- renovating it would be a nice touch i think

- death 

- “this IS a pickle” 

- a ruse cruise l0l

- “you’re right” can’t believe i’m taking advice from death

 - letting go of the past

- i don’t want to worry u queeeen

- this scene is familiar from asras route i think though i didn’t play it to this point, just have seen screenshots of it

- aw nadia

- that “back off zombie” option just reminds me of that heath inspector spongebob episode for some reason, but i’m going with “i wouldn’t say that”

- you could but u won’t

- “emotionally traumatizing zombie card” lmao

- ooo his thone room is kinda cool art wise

- i still love the devils art even tho i kinda hate him

- “do you ever stop talking” theres no other option to choose obviously

- nadia lecturing the devil is everything

- mortals but the apprentice is basically the fool so idk how true that exactly is

- WE WON

- what kind of person exactly WAS nadia if her family is this shocked that she wants them to visit, jeez

- fashion show lmfao

- natiqa gunna stay oo

- aw muriel and asra is still cute as fuck

- awww the baker getting to be procurator. thats also cute as fuck

- volta as official taste tester l0l

- portia totally has a crush on nahara and no one can convince me otherwise

- “i’m not ready to leave” 

- i swear they keep mentioning things on fire and although shes prob referring to the one we were there for, theres always so many stories involving the satrinavas that include setting things on fire and i want to hear all the stories

- “lets bother valerius” we owe him for it still

- “he deserves it” my thoughts exactly

- YOU BET I REMEMBER IT

- “what we’ve done!!”

- sprite artttttttt

- eeeeeee.

I do feel like the ending is somewhat anti-climactic. I would have loved to see the wedding and all that cute shit, but perhaps it could be a tale later on. Or it also gives fandom creators some room to let the imagination run wild and that’s always a positive thing as well. 

I haven’t looked around much, but i think theres some discourse about the endings, though when is there not discourse in the fandom lmfao. I will say that i think this does really play into what I said before that the upright ending and route playthrough is all about change. This is the person Nadia is capable of being at her best and her reversed ending the person she could be if she had stayed on the path she was set on. (or at her worse, if you prefer that). 

as said, I think I’ll put an overview thoughts in a different post, but I think book XXI was a pretty decent wrap up, though obviously I wish there had been more of it. 

Reversed Ending

- I’m still like.. not as mad about the reversed ending as a lot of people seemed to be, but also i agree with the apprentice. PANIC

- okay im really keen on domination and shit but being a possession of another person is really a no-no for me. but i get it nadia... this isn’t ur best u

- the devil really has a fetish for red, don’t he

- I think this place is never gunna let u go anyway tbh

- learning more about the devils nature and knowing that nadia is eventually gunna be the devil is just like... why.

- “which would u prefer” 

- u bet im gunna be fucking cheeky

- “ill obey” ig. idk what the “right answer” is so...

- say nothing

- nadias eyes are fucking creepy like what

- tbh i can’t believe this somehow backfired on the devil like... i didn’t think he was actually this stupid

- “its beautiful” 

- okay her devil sprite is hot asf. i admit it. 

- “of course’ 

- so valarius rules vesuvia now?

- its kinda of sad to see her relationship with the high priestess gone

- okay, also a hot CG

- “gimme!” tho i’m sure shes gunna make me beg or something wild

- “let me thank you properly” 

- kiss every inch of her

- thats kinda sweet in a weird sort of way

- “youre mine” 

- they fucked didn’t they

- youre going to free her... >.>

Okay, i have... thoughts. While I’ve said that I do believe that the Reverse ending is supposed to be Nadia as the person she was at the beginning of the story (or at least in some ways with some of her less desirable traits amplified to the max), this just seems... weird after playing the Upright ending. 

Obviously this makes sense if you played the route as a reverse ending. The apprentice is super dedicated to Nadia that they’ll follow her blindly, even if it means harming other people. You fail to see her faults and instead just tell her that people who criticize her are wrong. But like I said, I think the Devil honestly being that idiotic that he actually gave her the power to defeat him is just wild. In a way where there has to be a lot of suspension of disbelief for that to be a thing. But okay. This is where we are. 

I do think a lot of the domination/physical scenes with Nadia were super hot and wish we had gotten a bit more in the Upright ending, but since I have both endings, I can live with getting the emotional lovey stuff in one and the steamy physical stuff in another. THat’s fine. Also, I really do love Nadia’s Devil sprite. The art is great for it. 

Anyway, those are just some thoughts I had on my first play through. I’ll probably do a full reflection tomorrow when I’ve sort of had more time to process my feelings. As for what I’ll do with the Arcana now that Nadia’s route is over... I’m not sure. I’m not super hot on Portia, though I like her. Just not in a “I want to romance her way.” Maybe I’ll play through Muriel since I think he’s sweet and I thihnk his story will be super interesting. And As much as I hate Lucio in this route, I’m kinda of interested in how they’re planning on writing his route. 

[maternalcube]

i did an art summary so now im doing a fic summary. i was tagged by @jamthedingus also!! ive never done one of these before!! lets go!!!

Rest (13106)

Keith & Lance's Island Adventure (20631)

Atlantis (10014 words)

The Way to a Man’s Heart (6858 words)

nobody's business (2096 words)

leave, and take (557 words)

dead girl walking (1661 words)

the course of fate (1039 words)

who ya gonna call (465 words)

come here often? (806 words)

til kingdom come (1950 words)

stars in the sky (pt 2) (5404 words)

a song of falling (630 words)

Eyes to the Sky (3683 words)

Feet on the Ground (4050 words)

Divergence (6669 words)

homecoming (1426 words)

Window of Opportunity (11144 words)

along that wilderness of glass (3801 words)

string theory (2327 words)

Katt Week (1062 words)

The Pining-Plant (3860 words)

at the end of many worlds (21684 words)

you're my home (19646 words)

Believe Me (3177 words)

Starchild (3568 words)

Summer Heat (2285 words)

third time's the charm (5349 words)

Blackbird (59546 words)

The Sixth Planet (9444 words)

all the infinite realities (1197 words)

Total Fics: 31! (plus one i posted anonymously lmao) Total Words: 229999! (except parts of string theory and the sixth planet were actually posted last year... but still, what a number)

more under the cut!

Ship/character breakdown: i didnt filter out my prompt collection or abandoned wips here so /shrug Ship breakdown:

klance - 6 sheith - 5 shance - 5 katt - 4 heith - 3 pallura - 2 and one each of plance, kallura, allurance, shatt, shkatt, kidge, kidgance, and shunk. and keiths parents lol. let it never be said i am not a multishipper.

and i know gen isnt a ship but it tied with klance at 6 (plus whatevers in the prompt collection) which was a surprise

Character breakdown: man if theres a way to get ao3 to show me ALL the stats, i dont know it. but.

keith - 25 (shocker) shiro - 23 lance - 21 pidge - 17 hunk - 16 allura - 12 matt - 12 and then coran and sam are at 4, and zarkon ats 3 and presumably many others are at 3 or less

Characters that had the main focus: well ~9 were from keiths pov, and ~5 each from shiro and lances povs. i think i also had ~5 from multiple points of view. its safe to say that keith has my heart tho lol

Specifics:

Best/worst title? Best title: i still like “at the end of many worlds.” i weirdly still like “Blackbird” too even if it has nothing to do with anything... Worst title: “Rest.” :/ also like all of the abandoned wips bc i didnt care. and “Keith & Lance's Island Adventure.″ some of my zine fic titles were also... bad. im bad at titles.

Best/worst first line?

Best: Keith & Lance's Island Adventure. ok the title is bad but this line? this really sets the tone for whole fic. you know what youre getting yourself into here.

When Pidge invited Keith to a fully-funded graduation party aboard the Holt family boat (“the smaller one, anyway,” she’d said), this is not exactly what he'd pictured: three of them standing on a wobbly dock, packed bags at their feet, sky cloudy and gray, while the Holt siblings stand on a little ledge off the back of the boat and deny entry.

Worst: ive got two for this lol

at the end of many worlds: even i have to read this a couple times to figure out what i was trying to say. at least you know youre in for pain...

Keith’s mother shows up to interrupt movie night often enough that, this time, Keith almost doesn’t realize anything’s wrong. Almost, because she’s silhouetted by the movie, but she’s clutching her arm and panting for breath, and in the thin edge of light around her he sees a wet and vibrant red.

Divergence: because all your friends being dead is EXACTLY like losing at dodgeball. yeah, theres a reason i abandoned this one.

Hunk always hated playing dodgeball. Not because he was bad at it--though he was--but because he always ended up the last one standing, and therefore the only target for the entire other team. It was due to a tendency to hang unnoticed in the back, he knew, but that didn't change the sickening, empty feeling of looking around and realizing there's no one left but him, and there's no way he can win. Only wait for the inevitable.

This, Hunk decides, is a lot like that, only, like, a billion times worse.

Best/worst last line?

Best: The Pining-Plant. there are a few others that were cute too but this one is also good out of context so

And then the pod swishes open and he's scrambling to catch Pidge as she stumbles out. She clings to his arms to steady herself and his heart swells.

"Falling for me again, huh?" he asks, and she groans loudly.

"Let me go, I'm getting back in the pod," she says, and he laughs. He doesn't let go, and neither does she.

Worst: if im bad at titles, im worse at endings. most are bad. i suspect the ending to “Rest” is terrible but i cant bring myself to even open that shit again so: Believe Me. if weather were a recurring theme in this fic, itd be fine, but as is its just... a weird note to end the fic on lmao

Hunk rocks back on his heels. "We aren't counting this as our official first date, right?"

"I dunno," Keith says, and now he smiles at the rain instead of frowning. It shows no sign of easing up, but whatever—they're soaked anyway. "This seems pretty good to me."

“...All right.” If nothing else, it’ll make a good story. And, Hunk had to admit—he’s pretty happy with how it’s turned out, rain and all.

But next time, he's double-checking the forecast, just in case.

General questions:

Looking back, did you write more fics than you thought you would this year, less than you thought, or about what you predicted?

more than i expected! considering ive been in grad school all year!! i wrote about the same amount wordcount-wise in 2017 which i spent only half in school so. idk how i managed it.

What pairing/genre/fandom did you write that you would never have predicted last year?

the anonymous fic was a surprise but im not gonna talk about that lol. otherwise... nah, its all been my usual stuff.

What’s your favorite story this year? Not the most popular, but the one that makes you the happiest.

blackbird, probably. i like working on that one. summer heat was also fun, id sort of forgotten about it bc it was a zine fic but coming back to it, i really liked it. likewise with third time’s the charm. and i like t6p a lot even if i kinda hate drawing for it :’)

Okay, NOW your most popular story.

depends on your metric. window of opportunity has the most kudos, keith and lance’s island adventure has the most hits, and t6p has the most comments and subscriptions. 

Story most underappreciated by the universe?

AT THE END OF MANY WORLDS. oh man i killed myself over that fic. it was important to me. but i think the mcd scared everyone off :’)

Story that could have been better?

i realize “all of them” is kind of a cop out answer but like

Sexiest story?

i have written nothing sexy, ever, in my whole life

Saddest story?

i mean, ateomw. considering all the death. blackbird def has its moments too.

Most fun?

i feel like i answered this in the favorite story q lmao. you’re my home also gets a shoutout, that thing was,, super self-indulgent lmao. and id be lying if i said i didnt have fun with parts of ateomw, even if its mostly sad.

Story with single sweetest moment?

man i write a lot of fluff but so much of you’re my home is just tooth-rotting. heres part of the proposal scene lmao

"Lance!" Keith yelps, barely rescuing the ring from falling into the sand with them. Lance pushes himself up on his arms, silhouetted by the sun and glowing with it.

"Really?" he asks breathlessly.

"Yeah," Keith says, and maybe he should've prepared something to say, that's a thing people do, right? Hell, he's winging it. "I know we can't stay here on Earth forever, 'cause we're paladins, and there's still stuff out there we gotta do. And I know you probably want to stay because this is your home—but you're my home, and if we gotta go, at least you'll have me, good or bad." He grins crookedly. "Or rocket science. Whatever happens, I'll be there."

Hardest story to write?

well t6p gets a shoutout, but its not the writing thats the hard part for that. uhhh ive struggled with parts of blackbird. i remember k&l’s island adventure giving me a LOT of trouble, i think i posted late lol

Easiest/most fun story to write?

anything short uhhh for all the infinite realities, i kind of just sat down the other day (actually i was in bed but) and was like “im gonna write this” and then in the morning i just sat down and wrote it in one go. i dunno if id call it fun, but it was easy. t6p is super fun to write but, as mentioned, drawing it sucks.

Did any stories shift your perceptions of the characters?

no... my perceptions probably have shifted but not due to anything i wrote in particular. i did talk myself into liking allurance with a prompt fill, though, but im not sure that was 2018...

Most overdue story?

all the infinite realities lmao. at the end of many worlds needed that happy ending. and another shoutout to t6p, because thats been going on over a year and im still nowhere.

Did you take any writing risks this year? What did you learn from them?

does posting my abandoned wips count? ive still got some of those hanging around... blackbird was a bit of a risk bc my last longfic was written while i was unemployed and out of school, so like i had the time for it, and now i kinda dont. still chugging tho. ateomw b/c of all the death but it turns out i really like writing whump woops. and writing any sort of kissing always feels like a risk bc i suck at it but im getting better lol... i hope...

What are your fic writing goals for next year?

write more! finish things! do more sheith! i really want to work on this sheith longfic i came up with the other day... but i want to get blackbird over with first.

Tagging: eh! do it if you want to!

[artemiss-draws]

How I Learned of Asexuality (And My Journey With It):

Asexuality is slightly covered in a fog of misunderstanding and confusion, as is most, if not all, of the LGBTQ+ community. In this post I will explain my own journey/type of asexuality as well as knocking down some negative things that I’ve heard people say towards asexuality. Read on if you’re curious about it, starting to question your own sexuality, or are simply a fellow asexual/LGBTQ+ community member who want to find more people like them or just want to see what other people are like.

Let’s begin! I identify as Asexual (and lean towards panromantic as well).

Imma first explain the Ace part (*Ace is a shortened term for asexual :)*).

What does asexual mean? Well I’m glad you asked! It means that sex doesn’t really appeal to me (like, with anyone). Honestly I’d rather eat dinosaur shaped chicken nuggets with mis-matched fuzzy socks on while wrapped in a warm blanket watching my favorite tv show. Asexuality is different for everyone, some are staunchly against everything physical, some like limited physical activity, and there are even asexuals who DO have sex. There’s different labels for all of that. If you have some questions on that, I would suggest looking up the Ace spectrum, which ranges from demisexual (you need to have a deep emotional connection to someone if you do end up having sex) all the way to Aromantic-Asexual (Which means that they aren’t romantically or physically attracted to people usually at all) and there’s everything inbetween and beyond. Again, it’s different for everyone.

Personally, I do like cuddling and sometimes kissing (Idk tho since I’ve never kissed anyone) but for the most part, I don’t think about sex or really find it to be something I want to do. It does interest me in the aspect that its a form of showing love for a person, but I don’t really want to do it. I find that it makes me slightly grey-ace (which from what I understand, is like a sort of questioning ace, who doesn’t really have strict guidelines on their sexuality- which is okay either way, strict or non strict).

*Sidenote, this may change in the future. I see sexuality as something that’s fluid, so hey, maybe I might find myself identifying as something else as my life goes on. But for now, it’s a strong no thank you. *

You may have remembered that I mentioned panromantic, right? Well that means that I do have *crushes*, if you will. This includes celebrity crushes- for example, Tom Holland is gorgeous, Ruby Rose is an ethereal being, and Emma Watson is perfection. I think those people are absolutely stunning and even hot, but I don’t really want to do anything with them. I basically find people of all genders attractive af. There’s even people at my school who I find to be gorgeous af (it may just be their hair though… I’ll find out more as I go lol).

But that’s as far as it goes (people look pretty and I’d love to hug them, but most anything else is a no).

Now onto how I found out I was Asexual! Asexuality wasn’t something I was aware of until my freshman year of highschool. I had picked up Tumblr again, and I was starting to see a lot of LGBTQ awareness posts. I saw myself as an ally, but not much else. I remember seeing a post of all the different flags, and the Asexual one really stood out to me (I don’t know how I feel about the fact that I learned of asexuality because I found the flag to be pretty, but for now I try not to think of myself as false because of it). I researched the flag and started to learn about it.

At first I didn’t really think about how similar it was to how I felt. Honestly, I only really kept the knowledge because a friend of mine had come out as Asexual and I wanted to learn more. Over time, I started to realize that I identified as this, but I only really recently came out to friends because of the multiple comments and things that I heard and read that put asexuality down as fake.

I honestly felt like I was a fraud who was trying to insert themselves into the LGBTQ community when I didn’t need to. My best friend came out as nonbinary and pansexual, and honestly they truly helped me to become okay with the fact that I was ace.

My parents are another story, though. My parents are rather accepting of the LGBTQ community compared to the rest of society, and my mother has even told me she’s okay if I’m gay or bi. She even makes sure to use the right pronouns with my friends. But, and of course there’s a but, when I told her I was Asexual she immediately denied it.

She refuses to believe that it’s a thing and tells me I don’t need labels because that’s just sad. I’ve cried more than once over this. I can see how hard she tries, but it still feels like a punch to the gut when you’re not allowed to be the way you are around family.

My mom gets that I’m not really interested in relationships and she even defends me when my romance obsessed grandmother hounds me for information about any possible relationships I’ve had without her knowledge (still none, grandma. Please let me eat my chicken nuggets in peace). But her lack of knowledge about asexuality seems to make her doubt it being a thing.

I’ve told myself that there are others who have had it worse, and that at least my friends accept me, but it would be nice to live in a perfect world where I am fully accepted.

And to everyone reading this far, not only am I impressed, but I’m always here to talk. Literally send me a dm about ANYTHING and I will immediately jump in and start talking even if I don’t know a thing about it. I will research if I have to.

Matt just fucked everything up? Tell me more about what this idiot did and I will totally listen to you about FuCkInG SHitTy AsS MaTt. Your favorite character just died a fiery death? Give me a sec to research it and THEN IM DOWN TO RANT WITH YOU. I accept everyone, because so many people don’t, and I think there needs to be a push towards this.

Now onto the quotes I have taken from people that have been said to me and my own rebuttals-

To people who have told me I can’t be asexual and that “I need to choose a real sexuality”, Why can’t I be asexual?

“You’re too young to know” Okay, so fucking what? Being straight is as much of a choice as ace and everyone seems to accept straightness in whatever age sooo….

“You can’t just say neither!”(when talking about homo/hetero sexuality) Why not? Why does my sexuality concern you to this point?

“I thought the same way when I was your age, but I know better now.” That’s great, but sexuality is fluid. You aren’t me and I’m not you. Let me choose.

“It’s so sad you feel like you need labels.” The only reason I use labels is because I can relate to others like me and find a place for myself to fit with. (And isn’t straight a label? Just because you’re considered normal and don’t need to outright state your sexuality doesn’t mean you’re unlabeled so back the heck up and keep your heteronormative comments to yourself please and thank you).

“You haven’t even had sex anyway so how do you know?” Well, I think to myself, “does this appeal to me?” and guess what??? The answer is NO! Look, nothing past kissing and cuddling has ever really sounded attractive to me, and just because I’m 16 doesn’t mean that I have no clue what I’m talking about.

“But you like [insert name here]!” Yeah, they’re cute as fuck, but I’m not down to bang. Just sayin.

“Don’t you want kids?” Look my dude, there are so many ways now and even more will be created in the future for me to have a kid and not do the do to get it there. Pregnancy scares the living shit out of me anyway sooo. Moving on.

“That’s not even a thing.” Yes, it kinda is. There’s even famous people who identify as Asexual. Legit do some research it’s actually really interesting. Isaac Newton? Physics over physicality. (I just cracked my self up at that one haha). Anyway, historians are p sure he was Asexual.

In the end, I’m just me. Art nerd who loves sports and comics and the oddest combination of foods you could imagine. The fact that I’m asexual is just that. Another fact. And for anyone questioning if they might identify as a form of Ace, it’s okay if you later find out you’re something different. It’s okay to be Ace as well. It doesn’t define you, but it can help shape your life. If you think no one is going to accept you, just know the world is full of people who will, you just gotta find ‘em.

Whatever makes you the happiest is what you should strive for. I encourage you all to do some research! Get out there and learn! Because the more you learn, the less you fear the unknown and can finally be happy.

Toodles!