#i know hearts aren't always good
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mystmesstolemysoul · 1 year ago
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I'm gonna give Zens route my all, and he is sweet... But I am already not enjoying it as much as Yoosung's route.
To put it frankly, I feel like I have to play dumb and needy to get hearts with Zen. And I noticed this intensely at like 3am in a chat with seven and I was picking nearly every answer that I didn't want to and kept getting grey hearts 😭
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I FORGOT TO THROW OUT AFTER THE EPISODE RELEASED NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
#hand jumper#webtoon#sayeon lee#heron#ig??? BRUH..................#these fireworks are going to SET ME ON FIRE!!!!#but that's alr i guess!!!!!!!!!#because charcoal grilled prawn literally solves all my problems#before thinking about killing people i need everyone to sit down and think of their favourite food#and manifest the version of them that has it!!!!!!!!#maybe then all compulsions and intrusions of the mind can just go away#what if we all just pictured better versions of ourselves and just did it!!!#if we all stretched out our hands and tried we can at least live in the world knowing we did try!!#and it's better than not trying!!!!! AND BEING USELESS PIECES OF ROTTING GARBAGE!!!!!!#idk i've had a shit three years man i don't think i can take this any longer#IGNORE THAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#AND INSTEAD NOW LET'S THINK OF THE GOODIES YOU'RE GONNA GET IN TWO WEEKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#or now if you offer up your wallet to OUR LORD AND SAVIOUR sleepacross#and for the SMALL price of 5USD that's right 5USD!!!! this is to the people with credit/debit cards ofc#YOU CAN ACCESS THE GOATACROSS QNA BECAUSE IT IS PEAK!!!!!!#but just because the juninators[on here in case they aren't in the server] need to hear this so we can all sing happy birthday to her#INSTEAD OF MISSING IT FOR TWO YEARS#AND HAVING A WHOLE WINTER/CHRISTMAS COMPETITION IN DISCORD WITH MEMES AND ALL WITHOUT THIS CRUCIAL INFORMATION!!!!!!!#I THINK BECAUSE I KEEP THESE IN TAGS IT'S SAFE TO SAY THAT HER BIRTHDAY IS DEC 24TH AND WE SHOULD ALL SAY HAPPY LATE/HAPPY EARLY BIRTHDAY#TO OUR BELOVED QUEEN JUNI CHANG#BECAUSE NOW I JUST SHAFTED A 40K WIP I NEVER FINISHED FOR LAST YEAR'S WINTER SEASON FOR THE CHRISTMAS EPISODE OF 2024 IN THE RECYCLE BIN!!#BUT NOW WE CAN GIVE HER QUINTICE THE AMOUNT OF GIFTS THIS YEAR!!!!!!!!!!! SO LET'S DO THAT INSTEAD!!!!#ONE FOR HER BIRTHDAY!!!! ONE FOR CHRISLER!!! ONE FOR CIVIL SERVICE APPRECIATION DAY!!!!!#ANOTHER FOR BEING PEAK MENTOR!!!!! AND ANOTHER ONE FOR BEING GOD'S SILLIEST SOLDIER!!!![in our hearts!!]#APOLOGIES AS ALWAYS IF YOU MADE IT THIS FAR HERE!!!! AND A GOOD EVENING TO YOU ALL!!!!
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aromanticannibal · 16 days ago
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some people in this fandom r blind I fear like I already made a post about that but how are you people calling jayce evil now. are you not seeing the hallucinations and the blatant Something Happened. I don't see you guys calling jinx evil for killing people while hallucinating or whatever. why is jayce different suddenly like he's a character in a show too why r we not seeing the very obvious cliffhanger
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k7tt1 · 6 months ago
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Sometimes I sit down to think about the true ramifications of how / what the Fizz Bots are to Fizzarolli,
Imagine robotic clones ( sexual, at that ) being made of you and they are not only modeled after you in physical appearance, but have a likeness to your personality, mannerisms and general demeanor. Imagine they say the things you would, possibly act in the same way you would.
What's worse, is that they're made in your likeness in real time; their production / manufacturing ages along with you,
Imagine you SEE these things being assaulted, used & abused in public; these clones take it all with a smile. Soulless, mindless... But as if that's not enough, then realizing that they may just have sentience. Or at least, they give off the impression they do. And on top of ALL that... they have chunks of your memories, your past; they're you, but at the same time, they aren't,
What do you do with that information? How do you treat them ( yourself? )? What's the end game?
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thatonecrookedsmile · 7 months ago
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More progress being made. I finished re-reading The Illusion of Living this past Friday. It's a nice book. 👍 This was the last of the Bendy books in this "marathon" that I'm doing which I had already read previously and now I'm rereading, meaning that I'm kind of up to date when it comes to rereading all the books that were released until December 2021. But the race is not over yet. Soon I'll start Fade To Black, and (technically) I'll finally be up to date.
Just to continue my chain of posting about the books I finished (at least, the main ones that I really wanted to read) here it is…something I did at the beginning of March, on the night when shit went down. (I hope you know what I'm talking about). I saw the tweets first hand, I was there! Right at the damn moment. And it was..something reading those tweets alright. If the image above doesn't show it, my mood that night and the next 1-2 days wasn't so��� great. You might read this and think I'm exaggerating, but that night especially I, uuhhh, I didn't feel good! And this image (and maybe 2 more posts I made that night) are the results of that. (And to think that a week before this happened, I had finished rereading DCTL after a long time. Talk about better/worse timing than this)
At least, if you want the bright side of this, it's that even after that day, I decided to continue with my book marathon, and I don't regret it. I was down that day, but I wasn't out yet damn it!! and I'm still not. (I don't know if this sentence makes a lot of sense, but you get my point)
As a bonus, here's something I did the night I got to the part where Henry is first mentioned in the book (you can consider this as a representation of my reaction when he's first mentioned, both for when I read TIOL for the first time in 2021, as now in this rereading)
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Feat. canon Henry design and my fanon design for him (I wanted to include him here + I still read this book with my fan-designs in mind)
#bendy and the ink machine#batim#crookedsmile open his mouth#crookedsmile open his mouth;bendy#ABBY LAMBERT; IN MY HEART YOU ALWAYS BE CANON TO THE GAMES; I DON'T CARE WHAT THE OTHERS SAY#also;i'm a Henry Stein fan;could you tell#re-looking at the first image and realizing that I will probably have to change my Abby design eventually;specifically; the hair.#I'm sure this hair doesn't match with what was described in DCTL or TIOL;#It's going to be a little strange; I'm so used to drawing her like this; but hey; every now and then we have to make sacrifices#To summarize my thoughts on TIOL: it's a nice book! Although it is not my favorite among the other Bendy books written by Kress#It's great to see more of Joey; delving deeper into his character and seeing how he thinks and seeing more of his life before the studio#is an interesting read! but I still prefer stories like DCTL and TLO; you know;especially because these two also have the horror factor in#which;considering what TIOL is; it doesn't have it. It's still a good book tho. It's just not my favorite#and re: the whole book canonity thing: I was not happy! Wow; what a surprising thing to say#as someone who enjoyed the books;I was disappointed with what I thought was expanding the games universe;In the end;just wasn't doing it#like;ok;sure;that doesn't mean the books aren't worth reading; I'd say they are! but still;*points to the last tag*#Maybe; one day; in the future; I can even accept this decision and move on with life; you know. understand the why of this.#but in the current present? yeah;no. I will continue to ask myself why#I would say more; but Tumblr has a tag limit apparently so I'm running out of time. as a last message: read the books#regardless of what the devs say; I still think these things should be recognized.#that's all; peace
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icewindandboringhorror · 3 months ago
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It always seems a bit unbalanced on The Great Food Truck Race when there will be multiple teams who are cooking a wide variety of complex dishes with 10 different components and a bunch of prep work, and then there's that one team who like... exclusively serves plain crepes with some premade nutella on them, or plain waffles with just some whipped cream and cut up strawberries lol...
#AND then they'll be the winning team or whatever and its like... wow... imagine that... I wonder how its possible that they can get#more dishes out faster than the other teams... hrrmm.... lol#Not that they aren't still doing work like. obviously it's still hard and there's still a sales component and other stuff to be done#but It's just kind of unbalanced seeming when one group is serving like grilled shrimp sandwich with 3 homemade sauces and a#slaw and two sides and the other people are like... slicing fruit and drizzling a bottle of hersheys chocolate syrup on top of some thing#they just threw in a waffle maker for a few minutes#You see the footage of the teams cooking and everyone is like prepping a ton of different things and meat and vegetables and they have#boiling pots and pans and fryers going and tossing stuff in bowls and compiling these multi component dishes#and then That One Team is always just casually slicing bananas or doing some whipped cream in a bowl gbjhbhj#They usually dont even make their own caramel or chocolate sauces or anything. Nutella out of a jar babey!#So all you're really Making is like... whipped cream. and some sort of batter (waffle. crepe. etc)#If I got placed in a competition like that and I found out one of my opponents just sold waffles or pancake sticks or etc#like that I would just be like... okay.. I'm out then. bye. OR I would pivot and be like.. right I shall remove all complexity from my menu#whatsoever and just start selling plain balls of fried dough with powdered sugar or plain fries with nothing on them or something lol#update: OH my god.. one of these teams on a newer season is selling a 'bonus add on' where you can add#cinnamon sugar and caramel syrup (possibly not even home made by them???? just from a bottle) for $5 extra on your order#If I bought a $12 waffle from a food truck and they were like 'hey do you want to upgrade? for only $5 we'll drizzle a teaspoon#of caramel and sprinkle a little sugar and cinnamon on there!' I feel like I would cancel my order and walk away.#that is a $1 add on at MOST.. for a freaking DRIZZLE of caramel sauce LOL#and of course this team is in the top 3... squirrel.... come ON...#Which I know all these shows are fake and bad and whatever. I dont watch them seriously. I think I liked the first few seasons#but then anything past like season 4 (or whenever they started having established people who already ran food trucks on there#instead of taking a bunch of peope who had never run a food truck before and giving them one - which is a much more equal footing#premise to me) I have just been increasingly annoyed at and I really just have the show on for background noise#whilst doing chores or something and am not genuinely paying that much attention but... my god.. At least try to pretend its fair lol#WHICH I KNOWW... you can say 'well the other teams could do similar if they wanted.' or blah blah. tehcnically it's THEIR choice to#make stuff from scratch and not sell a bunch of packaged frozen chicken wings dropped into a fryer over a shitty 6min waffle or etc.#but... I will never respect a $5 for 1tbsp of caramel sauce type of situation.. even if they win.. you will always be losers in my heart#So many teams with real cooking skill & good concepts go home to the 'slap nutella on fried dough' people... how...
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dandyshucks · 4 months ago
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trying to tell other ppl about OCs is so hard and embarrassing, like yeah here's my automaton guy that I've been calling Empty Mask, yeah I nearly cried over the thought of him collecting broken porcelain dolls the other day, yeah he sounds kind of stupid but he's actually kind of a tragic character if u get to know his story,,,,,,
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smallest-moon · 2 years ago
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detective gumshoe my beloved ♥ the sweetest and most caring, please go give edgeworth a hug
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lenievi · 1 year ago
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this moment was so unfair of him (his voice had no business getting so soft, and of course a girl's gonna get her hopes up if you look at her like that)
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and this one too, when La'an told him that yes, he was a bit like the other him, and he smiled
#maybe just maybe the fandom will stop with jim is always 100% respectful towards women#he only thought about himself in this moment#i mean he was caught in the moment imho but he should stop it before being all am i anything like the other me?#and his voice became so soft when asking#anyway it's kinda hard watching this scene from both POVs because both of them are experiencing it differently#and la'an's heart is breaking#but it isn't easy for jim either#and anyway it's such a good scene#even though i wish the editing and the camera work was different#'why aren't you disappointed about them?' - because i want kirk to hurt and be in pain#he does feel the connection and if things were different he would want to explore it but he can't#and he needs to walk away from it. from la'an#there's a long hiatus and it ended in such a way that i can just imagine everything i wanted since the finale of s1#and more#because that's how long i've been into the potential of kirk/la'an#and if i can get a kirk romance that isn't just a one-off that will leave him heartbroken i'm gonna eat it up#even if snw might not make it that way. but i can make it that way because this episode gave a good starting ground for that#because it made it clear that kirk feels the connection and feels like he knows la'an#he wants to work with her more. he wants to spend time with her more. but he can't#and that's just what's good about it#if i write a fic i'm gonna give them a happy end but the ship itself is good because kirk will end up alone#snw nonsense#snw spoilers#ka'an#also skyshowtime needs to do something about that space in the subtitles lol#jim kirk#la’an noonien singh
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dameronswife · 10 months ago
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sometimes i think.........people would be less strange about gifmaker's role in the fandom..........if gifmaking seemed accessible to most people like it actually is.
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ihamtmus · 2 years ago
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this fandom will never choose hoseok first huh? as long as ANY of the other members is an option?
why does this always always happen i really do not understand
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idyllic-affections · 1 year ago
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scrolling through chronic illness tags is always very interesting because i always learn something new that relates to my body and my Mysterious Disorder that i currently have no diagnosis for. and i'm like. hey. what the fuck
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bunnyboy-juice · 1 year ago
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i hope all my friends who i don't talk to as much as i wish i did know they're constantly in my thoughts
#personal#i am in a constant state of agony because of how much i struggle to carry casual convos ):#bc i want to be closer to so many ppl#and i also stink at convos that aren't about specific things#and it makes it really hard to make friends bc the time it takes me to feel comfortable talking regularly is like...... long#and then i don't bother bc i feel like an ass#my heart hurts a little and I'm gonna cry from this insecurity today i can just feel it#esp cause today is the first time my best friend and i are gonna hang on vc even though we've been friends for like 7 years#and ik they don't mind bc they have similar hang ups and they love me and they're really patient with me and such#but also i feel so pathetic that i cant even regularly just call ppl to hang out#i feel like I'm a terrible person and the shittiest friend for having so many limits and boundaries and moving so slow#and the thing is i used to know how to go faster in friendships but between abuse and skill regression I'm...... terrible now#stupid asshole ex#the more i think of my struggles with interpersonal things the more i realize how much he impacted it#like i already stunk at making friends IRL by the time i met him like that's always been a thing#but i used to be so good at making friends online!!#and then he came into my life (as a friend first) and slowly isolated me from everyone for a few years before declaring that we had been-#-dating for a year (we had never officially started a relationship)#and then isolated me more and more until i literally only had him#4 years total with him in my life.#4 years that were crucial to my personhood (17-21)#4 years that by the time i finally managed to get him out of my life i had severely blunted social skills & more trauma than I already had#and now that I'm almost 4 years out from him being in my life (next spring) im realizing just how much he fucked me up#and took advantage of me and exacerbated issues he knew i had (bc i confided in him- he was my friend at first after all)#and even with a lot of work i still have the social skills of a severely abused reactive dog in a shelter#i should talk with my therapist more about this#i still haven't even fully shared my story with her about how he treated me bc every time i start i get so scared and upset i just sob#ugh):
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mcalhenwrites · 1 year ago
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Please canon KH, have Chirithy catch Ven up on everything he forgot and give him an angsty reunion with Lauriam I need this like I need water
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girlivealwaysbean · 3 months ago
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dni.
#i don't know how people who do not have siblings live cause#whenever i feel the very intense and real urge to genuinely kms their faces pop up in my head#my sister laughing at my jokes after she had a bad day and saying with tears in her eyes that hey you know what i need you so much please#call me constantly when im abroad i don't know what I'd do without you#and my little brother not trusting my parents advice when he is sick because he thinks they're constantly telling him to do a hundred thing#anyway but listening to me when im giving the exact same advice asking me such innocent questions that seem so obvious#but he doesn't know because of his childlike innocence#like why are we not going to the doctor if i have fever how do our parents know how to cure it and how can i take dolo without a doctors#prescription and me laughing and explaining that it's okay it's normal it's paracetamol you don't have to worry you'll be okay in day or 2#or how he's excitedly telling me that these are the colleges i looked up are they good how do you know if they're good#he needs me so much even tho he'd never say it they've been even worse parents to him than to me he doesn't have anyone else#so then how could i be so selfish and hurt the two people who love and need me the most the two people on whom if i see tears#it feels like a stab directly to the heart?#but i can't help it. can't help fantasizing about dying#maybe myself but even better if by some terminal illness#i keep thinking me lying in a hospital bed and doctors saying there's a complicated procedure and it's very expensive and results aren't#even guaranteed so are you sure want to be treated#and me saying no please let me die my parents would protest at first they would feel it is their duty responsibility to keep me alive#but id say please i don't have anything to live for and i just CAN'T i can't do this i can't live this life it's too difficult im not#capable im already failing please just let me give up and then they'd agree#and then i would tell my father that im sorry i couldn't pay you back for all the money you spent on me my education my living expenses#but atleast now i won't ask for anymore money from you ever you'll probably get some money from the insurance policies#and i would tell my mom that sorry for being such a burden on you all these years but now you can finally be free with the 2 kids you#actually love and you never have to cook for me again or fold my clothes or feel bad that i won't attend your family functions#and i would tell my siblings that i know it's sad but please i know you guys are strong and bright and you're gonna be very happy and#successful and that's enough for me im sorry we couldn't have our dream raksha bandhan away from our parents but you can carry on without#me and ill always love you. and that would be it.#i know it's wrong to fantasize so much about dying and ive read somewhere that they may just seem like thoughts now but if left untreated#one day you're gonna have a bad day and you're gonna find the perfect opportunity and you were so sure you were never going to do it but#then you do. but i don't know how to stop
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valiant-portabella-pirkko · 7 months ago
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listening to my Tideturners playlist was a mistake because I am having SO many feelings about the Sidewinder again.
she's not just any AU of Mai Trin; she's a version who's endured the absolute worst case scenario and lives every day in fear of losing everything all over again. but her story flips the entire narrative of Guild Wars 2 on its head; it's all a matter of perspective, and hers comes from an entirely different angle than we're used to.
what is a monster? as they say, to a bird, a cat is a monster.
the Sidewinder's monster is the Commander.
the first Commander she ever met was a tyrant who set the world on fire just to watch it burn. nothing could stop his rampage until there was nothing left to destroy. he made Scarlet Briar's war look like a playground scuffle; in fact, he did it by killing her and seizing her army to do it with. the Sidewinder doesn't have to wonder what a rogue Commander is capable of at their worst. she KNOWS.
and she also knows that if even a single one knew about her outpost, about her, about her people, and decided they were a threat to get rid of, there's absolutely nothing she could do to stop them. the most she could hope to do is be enough of a speed bump that the rest of the Turnabout can escape and make her sacrifice worthwhile.
she's spent decades building up a new world, a new society, and a new identity-- and in a split second a single person could bring it all crashing down. that absolutely terrifies her. it's all so fragile.
a major part of the Sidewinder's personal arc has to do with overcoming that dread to find common ground. because, truth-be-told, much as she'd insist otherwise? she's not so different from the Commander herself. she's fought long and hard to become someone worthy of the trust and respect that so many refugees from so many, many different worlds have placed on her. it's not enough to have it, she wants to DESERVE it. and even if she'd claim she's not there yet, most would agree she's succeeded. she's the beating heart of the Turnabout; none of it would exist without her. she's given all of them the hope that the heroes of their own worlds couldn't.
Mai Trin never wanted to be a leader or a hero or a politician. but as the Sidewinder, she's become all three out of necessity. she had no other choice. no one else was left alive to do it in her place.
so she puts on her mask, and she steps onto the stage, and she talks big, but deep down she knows that if the worst case scenario came back, there was nothing she could do to protect them, not on her own. the only thing that might stand a chance is another Commander, and is she really prepared to take a risk like that? is she willing to put it all on the line to fight for a future without fear?
and even if they are the right choice, even if they do agree to help in spite of it all... can she put one of the last good people at risk, knowing just what horrors they'd be up against? facing someone who's killed others like them a hundred times over, allowing them no rest even in death as their shambling corpses are conscripted into his undead army? how can she, in good conscience, expect anyone to face something so horrific with stakes as high as THAT? which is worse; that they turn against her, or that they trust her and die, adding another force of nature to their enemies' ranks? the Sidewinder doesn't know the answer to that question, if there is one.
there's so much weight on every choice she must make, and the consequences of every wrong move are unfathomable. she might not be the Commander, but that, at least, is one thing they have in common. the decisions they make will decide who lives and who dies.
all the Sidewinder can hope is that when she finally does make that leap of faith, she'll be ready to handle whatever results lay in store.
#my posts#the Sidewinder#Tideturners AU#i won't put this in the main tags because it's just me rambling incoherently and having Emotions but i just needed to Yell#honestly the most fascinating thing for me would be seeing what happens when she has the opportunity to meet other Commanders#specifically: ones that aren't crazed megalomaniacs like hers was! Ruju is SUCH a piece of work i need to talk about him someday#tbh if/when i actually put together a Tideturners RP group the first event would be a Commander gathering where she's trying to reach out#because she needs to! she KNOWS she needs to! but god there are SO many reasons that she doesn't. this woman has SO much trauma#any interaction between her and a Commander is bound to be interesting though regardless of whether they recognize her#because in both scenarios you'll get ENTIRELY different results... for better and for worse because Hoo Boy#if they don't: she'll just try to play it cool but she's so freaking nervous and is trying so hard to make a good impression#but she's still Mai Freaking Trin which means she's going to be a bit on the snarky side and definitely rough around the edges#and if they DO recognize her? how to give the Sidewinder a heart attack in one easy step. she'd freeze up IMMEDIATELY#like funnily enough she'd literally respond better to an AU Scarlet recognizing her because she Knows Scarlet#Commanders meanwhile are wildcards that can also be insanely destructive and dangerous and weren't always on great terms with Mai#and like. she knows that! she knows full well what her Reputation is elsewhere even if she left her version of the Alliance early#so while she didn't participate in like Any of that (Scarlet was already dead EARLY) she knows they won't know that#like. man. she's just fascinating to think about in terms of how she fits into everything because of what a mess she is#sidenote probably the saddest thing would be if she met a Commander who was a version of one she'd seen before#specifically: one that died holding off Ruju to let their timeline escape from him. that'd earn her trust immediately#though she'd feel SO bad about it and be very weirdly resistant to them facing Ruju directly (she already let them die once...)#I'm just. augh. all the thoughts tonight. explodes
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