#i know exactly why but if i pretend i dont maybe it will go away
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actual-changeling · 1 year ago
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good god my sleep schedule is fucked, 6:30 am and my meds should be kicking in but they're not and i really need to fix this
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minarinnn · 10 months ago
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“notice me” pt2
luke castellan x aphrodite!reader | pt1
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content/trigger warnings: fem!reader, SMUTT, p in v, virgin!luke, unprotected sex, rough sex, bold!reader
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it’s been a week since that day and you haven’t spoken to luke at all. if he didn’t know any better, he’d say you were ignoring him
you were. but this was all part of your twisted game. he made you wait for months, now it’s his time to wait. you wanted him to feel how you felt, maybe then you’ll give into your desires
you’d pretend not to see him, or be busy with studying or teaching your younger half-siblings. luke grew more and more impatient by the minute. he knew that you had always been a master at playing with peoples feelings, being aphrodite’s daughter and all, but this was going too far. he didn't understand why you were ignoring him when it was you who wanted his attention in the first place
every time he saw that you were free, you would leave. you wouldn’t even shoot him your flirty smile like you always did, all you did was spare him a simple glance
he felt like he was going insane, he’s never had to fight for your attention. it just came naturally. how you’d bat your eyelashes at him while complimenting his fighting style, or how you’d place your hand on his bicep as you spoke to him
he never thought he’d be the one doing the chasing. so, finally, after what felt like an eternity of being ignored, luke had had enough. he walked up to your dining table, interrupting your conversation with your half-sister, drew. “hey, can we talk?” he spoke, voice low and almost sounding desperate
“sure” you agree, watching as he bites the inside of his cheek. “in private” he mutters out, eyes boring into your own. you nod, following him to the storage shed just outside his cabin.
you enter the small, dark shed, feeling luke’s intense gaze on you. it feels almost like it's burning holes into your skin, like he's trying to see right through you. he leaned on the wall, crossing his arms under his chest, his muscles subconsciously flexing showing just how toned his muscles actually are
luke took a deep breath before speaking, his voice low and serious. "so, why’ve you been ignoring me all week?" his eyes searched yours, looking for any sign of an explanation. you remained composed, not wanting to give away the game you were playing. "my world doesn’t revolve around you, castellan” you said with a playful smile
luke clicked his tongue, clearly frustrated. "dont play games with me, you know exactly what I'm talking about” he took a step closer to you, eyes locked on yours “answer my question”
you felt your heart pound in your chest as luke steadily closed the distance between you. his presence was inescapable, and the tension between you was palpable. you felt yourself getting needier by the second. the way your pussy throbbed at just his words had you weak
you looked at him through hooded eyes, a playful smile still tugging at your lips. “you wanna know that bad, huh?” you said, putting your hands to his toned chest. “you drive me insane” he whispered, lust practically pouring out of his body
“i know” you chuckled softly. luke just looks at you, his expression unreadable. leaning in, he finally kisses you. the kiss is sudden and fierce, his lips pressing against yours with a hunger that you haven't seen in him before. you wrap your arms around luke’s neck, pulling him closer to you. the kiss becomes more desperate as he pushes you against the wall, it was more urgent, as if neither of you could get enough of the other
his hands are quick to find their way under your shirt, groping your breast over your bra. he was desperate to get the fabric off of you, desperate to feel you
he takes his own shirt off, you following suit. you giggle as his fingers fumble on the clip of your bra, fingers stumbling against each other as he blindly tries to take it off. you help him, of course.
his mouth quickly latches on to one of your perky nipples, groaning with a sense of satisfaction while his fingers pinch the other, making you squirm under his touch
your fingers pull and scratch on his scalp, a feeling he’s seeming to enjoy to the fullest, given the way he’s moaning against your skin. your free hand undoes his belt, efficiently pulling his pants down under his hips. a voice in the back of his head wanted to ask you if you’ve done this before, but he was too fucking horny to wanna do anything else in that moment
he’s panting, face flushed as he pull don’t your shorts along with your panties, biting his lip to prevent the whine he was gonna let out once he saw the mess you’ve made on your panties. he hasn’t even done much, talk about an ego boost
he’s snapped out from his thought when he feels your cold manicured fingers wrap around his length giving it a few strokes. the tip of his dick flushed a bright reddish pink, feeling the veins throb in your hand at the newly found sensation
“first time?” you tease, knowing full well that it was. “i’ll be gentle, promise” he replied smugly, raising on of your legs to his hip, tip aligning with your entrance. the moment he pushes the tip in, you both gasp. he’s much bigger than you expected, and you’re much tighter than he expected
“fuck” he panted out “s’tight”. your nails dug crescent moons on his shoulders as he sunk the rest of his length into your throbbing cunt. he’s quick to pull out and slam back into you, making you shamelessly moan out his name and your eyes rolling back
he might not have done this before, but he knows how sex works. he promised he’d be gentle, but luke castellan isn’t know for keeping promises, is he? and after you made him wait a whole week, you more than deserve a little punishment
so he’s thrusting up into you, giving you little to no time to adjust to his cock. and you’re so loud about it too. so he puts his middle and index finger into your mouth. “suck” is the only thing he says before your cheeks hollow out and your tongue wraps around his fingers. he can feel the vibrations of your moans through his arms and it’s coursing straight to his dick, making it throb inside of you
“good girl” he mutters into your neck, making you tighten impossibly tighter around his dick. a few more thrust and your cumming on his cock. he doesn’t let you come down from your high, his thrust maintain the same quick and rough pace they had before, making you whine against his fingers at the overstimulation
tears pooling in your eyes as he’s kissing your forehead. “you’re doing s’good f’me baby” he’d grunt out “im gonna fuckin’ ruin you”
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© MINARINNN 2024 - please do not plagiarize or upload my content on any social media platform.
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angelltheninth · 2 months ago
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Hi!!! Im not used to requesting but i just thought of this, could you write a scenario where the reader, does the trend where you pretend to pet a dog/cat like you drag your hand over there head like your about to pet them, but you dont? and they lean into it and dont understand what your doing? i hope you get what i mean!! sorry if i was unclear... 💗💗
(with gorou, itto, lyney, tighnari, maybe neuvilette or zhongli?? and anyone else you want)
I know exactly what you mean, my cat and dog do that a lot.
Pairing: Gorou, Itto, Tighnari, Neuvilette, Zhongli x Reader
Tags: fluff, cuteness overload, pouting, wanting headpats, tail shenanigans, cuddles, hand kisses
Ko-Fi | Rules | Fandoms and Characters
A/N: I'm sorry I don't write for Lyney but I'm gonna include everyone else.
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Gorou is embaressed if you do this in front of his men. He's always had a bit of a cuteness to him, you said so too. That cuteness doesn't go away when he's the one giving orders, it makes him cuter and you can't resist letting your hand hover above his head. Nor can he resist leaning his head to the side to feel your fingers against his fluffy ear and his tail wagging the slightest bit before he pulls away.
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Itto always wants to know how much you adore him and headpats are a very acceptable form of affection to the big oni. Will put his head into your lap when he's talking but won't directly ask. Instead he waits for your hand to be within range of his head and then he takes his story up a notch, thus also leaning up into your touch. His toothy grin is prevalent on his face when he feels your hand press firmer.
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Tighnari will deny that he enjoys what you're doing, claiming that it's silly or childish. And yet when he comes back tired from patrols and collapses into the bed next to you he yearns for your touch. He will cuddle up to you, his big ears flicking back and forth until your hand is close enough for him to lean up into it. A tired, but content sigh leaves his lips while you pet him and welcome him home.
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Neuvilette noticed your hand hovering but at first he payed it no mind. He was waiting for you to lower it and run your fingers against his hair. When the touch never came he stopped his writing and looked at you, confusion met with an odd kind of smugness that was actually kinda cute on you. To get this over with he leaned into your touch instead, a small smile forming on his lips as he did so.
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Zhongli was very confused as to why you're letting your hand hover like that. At first he misunderstood the gesture and thought you wanted him to kiss your hand and so he did. When you did it again you saw his dragon tail tapping impatiently behind him, his mind wanting to figure this out. Just when he looked like he would walk away he leaned into your hand, eyes widening at your smile.
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blackknight-kai · 1 month ago
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Hi, so i’m a lurker but I kinda decided to stop lurking and personally want to request if you can maybe write a headcanon of the Destined one or Sun Wukong when reader would occassionally glances at them but its only because Reader have a crush on them and is trying to play it off that they dont have a crush
Also love your writing-
Here you go!! One for each :) just because I feel like they’d be a bit different. (Also you’re so kind for saying you like my stuff 🫶🫶🫶)
You’ve got a crush but aren’t trying to be sussed out yet? Oh boy. Poor you. He’s noticed. 100% noticed you looking at him and the little awkward thing you do when you look away quickly.
Destined One:
- [ ] Does NOT know what you’re staring at him for.
- [ ] Absolute idiot when it comes to romance, he’s been too focused on his journey to care about that kind of stuff.
- [ ] Completely lost. Starts to wonder if maybe there’s something stuck in his fur or maybe you think he stinks or something, he doesnt know.
- [ ] It’s giving him a complex because WHY does he catch you eyeing him so much? (And why does it get under his skin?)
- [ ] Do you want to fight him? Is he doing something strange?
- [ ] Starts watching you closer than he already was, probably squints/frowns deeper when he catches your eyes lingering on him before you quickly turn away. His tail will start to twitch with annoyance because WHAT ARE YOU LOOKING AT AND WHY WONT YOU TELL ME?
- [ ] Does he look weird? Is there food stuck in his chin fur?
- [ ] It bothers him in more ways than one. Again, now he’s aware of it he cant stop wondering about it but also, the more he see’s you do it the more awkward he acts and he gets a bit shy about it.
- [ ] Makes his fur ruffle and makes him twitchy.
- [ ] Starting to like the way you look at him, eventually he will figure out WHY he likes it.
- [ ] Don’t stare at other people though because he wants your eyes on him regardless of if he realizes it or not. It will annoy him because he thought you only glanced / stared at HIM.
- [ ] Over time he will notice if your cheeks tint pink. It’s going to make him VERY intent on you and your flustered state. He’s already pretty intense anyway but now you’re going to have his full attention as he tries to decide if maybe look him makes you sick or something. Which he would HATE.
- [ ] He’d gonna start showing off (fighting or mundane tasks) especially if he notices you staring at certain moments - this will be an unconscious act at first before deliberate.
- [ ] At some point he is going to grab your chin as you look away and silently demand you tell him why you’re staring at him so much.
Wukong:
- [ ] He clocked you glancing at him almost immediately. He’s too vain and aware not to.
- [ ] That said, he doesnt know WHY. At first.
- [ ] He’s used to people staring, he does make a spectacle of himself very often. And in his mind, why shouldn’t people stare at him? He’s amazing and all the synonyms of that word. So at first he doesnt mind it since he figures you’ll get your fill of whatever it is you’re looking at him for.
- [ ] When you dont though and he keeps catching you looking at him, well now hes curious. A curious Wukong is a dangerous thing.
- [ ] Your glances are starting to get under his fur too. Because WHY are you peeking at him?
- [ ] If others were to do it he wouldn’t care, outside of maybe using it to start a fight with them, but you? Regardless of if he realizes it or not he’s falling for you and your eyes on him makes him feel tingly.
- [ ] He’s going to start testing you. Will definitely pretend he doesn’t notice you looking for a while.
- [ ] But he’s going to start doing certain things to note exactly WHEN you stare at him so he can determine WHY. Because apparently you dont want him to know, and he going to store that nugget for future mischievous opportunities.
- [ ] But also, what if you know something he doesnt? That isnt going to slide.
- [ ] So he watches you carefully as he purposely does things to see your different reactions to them.
- [ ] He’s gonna figure you out real fast though especially when your cheeks flush pink while you were staring at his chest, his shirt had gone a little more loose than normal (might have done that on purpose).
- [ ] He is going to have the fattest smirk on his face and his tail is going to swish behind him like the arrogant jerk he is. You like him. Or at least find him pleasing to look at.
- [ ] He’s going to amp up his “do things to make them stare” mission.
- [ ] “Oops I spilled on my shirt, I guess I have to take it off” or “look at me while I do this ridiculous unnecessary show of strength” kind of shit and always right in your view.
- [ ] As much as seeing you try to cover your tracks is funny and amusing to him, eventually he’s going to get impatient with it.
- [ ] He is gonna call you out. - however THAT conversation turns out is up to you.
- [ ] But now that it’s out in the open he’s going to make sure that whenever he does something he is going to look over at you expectantly like ‘Are you watching? Yeah you’re watching. Of course you are.’
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parkerluvsu · 2 months ago
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JUNA (art donaldson x reader)
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come to me slowly / it's when you talk close enough
art can't help but walk on eggshells around you.. to treat you like glass that could break at any moment.. but how could he not? he worships the ground you walk on, he'd do anything for you, to keep you with him. even when he talks to you he's quiet, almost meek, but you'd never make fun of him, it's sweet the way he follows you around like a devoted puppy, and does anything to see you smile <3
that i feel it on my skin / breathe it in
art has a nightly routine of helping you rub lotion on your skin, ever since he saw you doing it in the mirror after your shower he was enamored with the sweet smelling cream on your soft skin. you're sure that if art wasn't a tennis player he'd absolutely be a massage therapist, how he knows exactly where to rub to make you release the breath you've been holding in all day, you don't know. and art enjoys it as much as you, being able to be so close to you, the sweet perfume of the lotion making his brain go fuzzy <3
most of these days i don't get too intimate / why would i let you in?
even though arts brain is fuzzy he always has some doubts in the back of his mind, how maybe he isn't good enough for you.. hes been burned before, previous partners pushing him away eventually, telling him they've just "lost interest".. he thinks his heart would actually break in two if you said that to him. he knows he's got a problem.. he should try and stay present with you.. put you dont let it slide, noticing he's been rubbing the same spot on your leg for more than 3 minutes. you reach down, placing a soft hand on the side of his face <3
but i think again / i don't even try
art snaps out of his stupor, big blue eyes gazing up at you, embarrassed that he's been caught. he can never get away with things with you, it's like you read his mind. "art.." you sigh, "get out of your head okay?" he nods, sighing and slumping into the mattress, his head smushed against your newly moisturized thigh <3
i don't have to think / with you, there's no pretending
art is almost ashamed of how easy it is for you to just wipe all doubts from his mind, the simple touch of your hand sending shivers down his spine. he knows he can't hide anything from you.. and it's foolish to think he could. he could never pretend to be okay when he isn't, but he's grateful for that. art makes his way back up your body to sit next to you, leaning his toned body into your side, his eyes closed in thought. even though his head is full of doubts, he looks as pretty as ever, his skin glowing in the lamp light <3
you know me, you know me / and i might just know you too
art loves you so much.. he'd never be able to say which part of you he loves most.. but maybe it's the fact that you know him so well, you can pretty much read his mind. but it's not unfair, he knows you just as much, he can predict your movements and silly comments before you say them when you're watching a movie together, he can order for you at any restaurant because he knows what you like, he comes home with the snack you've been craving all day without you having to ask. yes, you know him, and he knows you <3
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tiredofthehumanlife · 18 days ago
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Exquisite bedding and a loving married couple
Part two
Barbie dolls: husband! president!Coriolanus Snow x gn! Reader
Word: 3.4k
Summary: you grow closer to your husband (of who you were forced to marry 😱) also you have chronic pain/ a disability in that area it's left vague so everybody can enjoy and not just me
Warnings: I won't lie to you he's a good amount ooc but this is because I wrote this before I finished the book and before I watched the movie so I only knew academy coriolanus, so maybe just pretend like everything worked out for and became president nicely idk, you have chronic pain/ a disability that makes your body hurt idk just roll with me, forced marriages, you like art now it's like all you do, non sexual nudity, you make friends with the Avoxes that work for him, you cry, you say you're defective and coryo is like "hey hurumph dont do that🙅", yeah that's it really
Coriolanus didn’t exactly know what was expected of him during a forced marriage. He didn’t hate you, but he didn’t exactly like you very much either. He didn’t even know your favorite color and now you both shared a house, bed, and a last name. What is he supposed to do? 
You didn’t seem to like him very much either. You barely spoke, only saying a few words to the Avoxes and even fewer to him. Sometimes he questioned if you were an avox yourself, and then you’d mutter to yourself and it was crossed from his mind.
You rarely looked at him, often just floating around the mansion like a ghost and glancing at him when he tried to ask you a question. Coriolanus doubted you even knew his name at this point.
Sometimes you’d leave him notes clipped to his hanger holding up his suit for the work day. They were never anything of substance just a question you had about the house or a question about the things you were allowed to do. Coriolanus had no idea why you were asking him if you could go on a walk, he didn’t really care what you did ever as long as you made it back to the mansion in one piece and didn’t spread rumors about him.
You did share a bed and that was about as close as you two got. You slept on either side of the quite large bed and pretended the other person didn’t exist. 
As time passed you seemed to settle into the new house and new life. You had fluffy, useless conversations over dinner. It wasn’t much but it was better than the silent treatment. You learned every Avox’s name in the mansion. You started leaving notes asking for utensils that he assumed were for your hobbies.
He didn’t know any of the names but he still took the list to a craft store and let an employee handle it. Coriolanus left it in the sunroom you had claimed as your own. You spent all your time in there, staring out at the gardens in the backyard. He wondered why you didn’t just walk in the gardens but he wasn’t pushing it.
A small hint of a smile graced your features when you sat in that room and it was the happiest he’d seen you in the mansion so he wasn’t asking you any questions. He left the bags from the craft store on the rounded wooden coffee table. Coriolanus left a card with his initials on it in front of the bags. He hoped it’d give him some positive credit in your heart. 
The next day when he came home from work he peaked into the sun room to see it had been taken over by your presence. Art supplies and half-finished works were scattered everywhere.
You were sat on the luxurious chaise with a pattern that reminded him of the Grandma’am’s dresses. You had color and white streaks on your face, your hands were filthy, and you were fanning yourself with a piece of paper like the excitement made you break a sweat. All that mess would’ve made him upset. Imagine if you got that paint on the furniture. All the negative thoughts he conjured up washed away the second he saw the happy and relaxed look on your face. You looked at home. Coriolanus left it and slipped away from the door without gaining your attention. 
After that, he felt like you truly getting comfortable. Especially with him. He thought you might even like him more than an acquaintance. You started leaving compliments on his hangers instead of questions and lists.
Coriolanus still remembers reading the first one and blushing like a schoolboy. He shoved the note into the top drawer of his dresser and ignored the burning on his cheeks. Strangely enough, he started to find your art everywhere. He found a new small vase on his dresser one day. It was very small. It could hold maybe three or four flowers but it wasn’t the size that caught his attention. On the white background of the ceramic vase were little engraved roses. He thought of you being observant enough to notice him wearing them.
Coriolanus wasn’t sure how to thank you. He took a page from your metaphorical book and left a note to you on your dresser. He spoke of how he wanted to thank you but didn’t know what would bring his message across. Initially, he had thought of buying you some fancy jewelry on the ride home but it didn’t seem like something you would enjoy. He suggested an art thingy you really wanted. 
You thanked him for the note over dinner and started rattling off all about the art supplies you loved and all the art facts you knew. He couldn’t understand a word of what you said but still nodded along and hummed. A smile and sparkle in your eye had found your face. Coriolanus didn’t realize your face could make that expression. Halfway through one of your sentences your face fell. You stopped speaking and looked down at your plate. Coriolanus stared at you, wondering what could’ve provoked you to lose all of your energy like that. You shook your head like you were disappointed in yourself. 
“Sorry, I know you probably don’t want to listen to me talk all night. How was work?” You said, keeping your eyes on your plate. Coriolanus’ brain worked a thousand miles to catch up with yours. He sat back in his chair, wiping at the corners of his mouth. 
“I was listening. I was quite enjoying it, actually. That French painter used to eat yellow paint? Right? And I’d rather not speak of my work. It’s draining enough there much less coming home to talk about it.” Coriolanus said, making you lift your head. Your smile hadn’t returned but your defeated shoulders left. You looked him up and down. 
“He was actually Dutch. He just lived in France.” You muttered. He actually didn’t mean to mess his facts up but he was glad it got you talking again. You straightened up, a quarter of your spirits returning. “Also he didn’t eat the paint so he could ingest the happiness, as many believe. He tried to poison himself with it.” You said. Coriolanus scribbled down on his mental notes about you; you could not stand an incorrect art fact. He knew how to get you talking now. 
He thought everything was going so well too. The day had been pretty good. There was a note on his suit that complimented the tie he set out. Work was work but today felt less grueling with your simple compliment stirring in his head all day. He found a tiny ceramic cat snoozing away on top of his dresser. That he quite enjoyed.
Coriolanus said so over dinner as well. Your energy was lower, only answering with short responses. He tried to raise your energy by asking about what art project you worked on today but even that couldn’t pull you out of your slump. He assumed you must’ve had a rough night. Though he didn’t remember you tossing and turning. 
An Avox had ran you a warm bath after dinner. Though after you had slipped into the water, they started helping with the work in the kitchen. Coriolanus personally wouldn’t spend so much time in the bath but he wasn’t you so what did he know?
After he finished dressing for bed and setting out his suit, he maneuvered his way to your shared bathroom to brush his teeth. Sure he could’ve walked a few feet down the hallway to another unoccupied bathroom but strangely enough he missed your presence. He raised his hand to knock on the door but paused when he heard sniffling on the other side. Coriolanus wondered if the right thing to do was to go hide in the bedroom until you left the bathroom, go use the other bathroom and ignore your struggles, or knock. 
He rapped his knuckles against the wood, leaning his ear towards the door. Coriolanus raised his voice so you could hear him, but his tone remained soft.  He said he needed to use the sink and would be in and out in a few minutes. He waited for you to answer. You called for him to come in.
Coriolanus gently pushed open the door and tried to meet your eyes. You were sunken low into the bubbling water, only your face from the nose up present. You stared at the bathroom wall, avoiding his gaze. Coriolanus moved to the sink and brushed his teeth as fast as he could without disregarding their health. When he finished he turned back to the tub, feeling strange just standing there staring at you in the bath. 
“Are you okay?” He whispered. You sniffed and splashed the bubbles against the bathtub wall. You nodded, making waves in the soapy water. 
“Are you sure? I heard crying from outside the door.” He said, pointing over at the closed door. Your chin surfaced over the water. You turned to face him. Your eyes were red and it was entirely evident you had been crying for a long time. 
“Nosey.” You said, just barely passing over a breath. Coriolanus sank to his knees next to the edge of the bathtub. 
“I can help. Promise. I just don’t know what’s wrong.” He explained that like you didn’t get it. You fully understood without his help. You sighed and dropped your head back against the bathtub wall. 
“Promise you won’t judge me?” You asked, peeking an eye at him. Coriolanus tried to think of something that would cause you to cry in the bath and make him judge you. He came up with nothing. He shook his head. Your hand splashed out from the bubbles, holding out your pinkie towards him. Coriolanus intertwined his pinkie with yours, shaking it slightly to signify the deal. 
“Sometimes my body hurts. Really bad. So bad I stay up at night crying because it won’t stop. It makes just living really difficult. Sometimes I feel like I can’t move because I know if I do it will hurt more so I just plop myself into one spot and don’t move.” Coriolanus was shocked he hadn’t been able to deduce this before. No wonder you didn't walk in the gardens or meander about the mansion. You found a room and stayed there. He really wasn’t observant apparently. Coriolanus slipped his hand into the water, soaking his pajama shirt sleeve. Coriolanus’ hand found yours immediately. He intertwined his fingers with yours, running a thumb over the back of your hand soothingly. You sniffled again, glancing over at the wall before looking back at him. 
“Earlier today it started to flare up but I thought it would be manageable. It started really hurting at dinner but I knew I just had a few more things to do and then the day would be over. But now I feel like I can’t move, it hurts so bad I can’t stand up. I can’t even call Mavvy because she's in the kitchen. It hurts, so much I don’t know how I can get out of this stupid bathtub.” You said. Your frustration boiled over and slapped your other hand against the water. It splashed Coriolanus on the cheek. He was going to say that was quite rude of you but you slumped against the side of the tub in such a pitiful way he couldn’t bear to say anything mean to you.
Coriolanus wasn’t sure who Mavvy was but he could assume she was one of the Avoxes that work in his mansion. He hummed and reached for your face. He gently brushed away a tear from your cheek though it didn’t matter much because all your skin was wet. 
“Let me help you out,” Coriolanus said, squeezing your hand under the water. You straightened your head, staring at him with a strange expression. 
“Are you sure? I can do it. I can. It will take me a long time and a lot of tears but I can do it. You don’t have to. You’d have to change your pajamas and everything.” You said. Coriolanus lifted your hand from the water and gently pressed his lips to the back of your hand. 
“I don’t mind. Let me help, I want to.” Coriolanus said. You huffed and nodded. You slowly pulled yourself up into a sitting position. You clenched your teeth in the process. Coriolanus wondered how badly it burned just to sit up, but by the look on your face, he didn’t want to find out. Coriolanus slipped your intertwined hand over his head, pulling your arm over his shoulder. He pulled his arm around your waist and tugged you closer to his body. You’d need all the support you could get to leave the tub. 
“Ready?” Coriolanus whispered. You sucked in a deep breath and nodded. Coriolanus counted down from three before pulling your body up. You groaned in the process and clutched his hand tighter. Your legs shuffled and you finally pressed your feet to the bottom of the tub. Coriolanus tried to pull you higher into a standing position. You gasped and flung your free hand out to brace against the wall. 
“Stop. Stop. Just wait a second.” Pain pulled at your words and he wondered if you were going to cry again. It hurt holding his half-standing half-squatting position but he knew it couldn’t hold a candle flame to your pain. The way you were gasping like a fire was set to your skin every time he moved a centimeter made him wish he was a stone statue. You steadied your breathing and knocked your hand against his chest. He took it as a signal to continue. Coriolanus tugged you up onto your feet and you were finally standing in the tub. You let out a shaky breath and pressed your head against his shoulder. 
It took a lot of time and effort but eventually, Coriolanus was able to pull your wet body into your shared bedroom. He helped you sit down on the edge of the bed, a few curses following after you. He skittered into the bathroom and brought a towel back to you. You tried to argue against it but he waved you off and sank to his knees in front of you. Coriolanus dried off your body. He tried his hardest to move your limbs slowly, to not cause more harm. Your body was dry after a few minutes and he flung the towel away, helping you shuffle up towards your spot on the bed. Coriolanus helped tuck you in, apologizing when his wrong move made you groan. 
Coriolanus sat next to you on the bed, caressing your face in hopes of it soothing you. You hummed and leaned into his touch. You opened your eyes and looked at him sadly. 
“Sorry.” You whispered. He wondered if it hurt to talk louder but didn’t want to ask you questions about it. You had enough going on right now, evidently. 
“For what?” Coriolanus asked, rubbing his thumb over your cheekbone. You shrugged, wincing after. 
“Being defective, I guess. You should’ve gotten a better deal with this whole marriage thing.” You leaned your head against your pillow and stared at the sheets. Coriolanus felt his heart squeeze. It was preposterous. Truly. For you to think this way about yourself. He shook his head, leaning down to put his face in your line of sight. 
“You are not defective. I wouldn’t want anyone else to marry. Just because you have any disability or health problems does not mean I’m itching to send you away. I know our marriage wasn’t exactly out of passion but I’ve grown to care for you. I want you to be happy and comfortable. I’ll carry you for the rest of my life if it brings a smile to your face.” Coriolanus brushed his knuckle against your temple. You leaned your face into his hand, closing your eyes. Coriolanus leaned down and pressed his forehead against yours for a moment. 
“Thank you, Mr. Snow.” You whispered. Coriolanus pulled back and snorted. You glared at him, turning your head away from him. 
“Please, Coriolanus.” He thought about telling you to call him Coryo but he decided he should let you warm up to him more. You nodded and slowly moved your hand towards his and held onto it. 
That night he was sure that you two were sleeping closer. You were both on opposite sides of the bed but you were still latched onto his hand. In the large space between you two, that he once visualized as a brick wall, were your clasped hands. You didn’t move in your sleep, still in the position he helped you into last night when he woke up. Coriolanus wiggled around in his sleep but his hand was still with yours when his alarm went off. 
He gently pulled his hand away from yours and slowly sat up. Coriolanus worried if he moved the mattress too much it would cause you more pain. It hurt so bad yesterday that just him moving your leg up from the floor made you wince. Coriolanus doubted one sleep would make it better.
Coriolanus turned off his alarm and sat still on the edge of the mattress with his back turned to you. He wished he could just fling himself back into bed and never leave again. He wondered if he could call in sick, his partner was sick.
Coriolanus sighed and rubbed his face, hoping it would brush away the fatigue. He was startled when a hand ran down his back. Coriolanus turned his head back and saw you staring at him. Your face was evidence enough of your long night. Your eyes were droopy and you looked at him in a way that made him sure you had plenty of struggles falling asleep with pain coursing through your body. Coriolanus leaned to the side, taking your hand away from his back and into his palm. 
“Thank you.” You whispered, sleep still pulling your words into the sheets with you. Coriolanus shook his head and rubbed the back of your hand again. 
“I don't need thanks. I wanted to help you.” He said. Coriolanus leaned over the bed next to you. Your eyebrows pinched when the mattress sank under his weight and he mentally smacked himself for it. You nodded in acceptance of his words. He gently brought your knuckles to his lips again. When he pulled back he found your eyes had shut. Coriolanus reached up and gently brushed your temple with his thumb. Your eyes opened and you stared at him. 
“Take it easy today, okay? Don't push yourself.” He whispered, his lips still close enough to your hand that you could feel his breath. You nodded and slowly scooted further down the mattress. It didn't look like it caused too much pain but you squeezed your eyes shut all the same. 
Coriolanus didn't get a note on his hanger today, though he wasn't surprised. Apparently, you couldn't let him leave the house without a compliment to think of during the day because your quiet voice called out to him as he reached for the bedroom door. Coriolanus turned back and raised an eyebrow at you in question. You complimented how the suit brought his eyes with your cheek pressed against your pillow and your eyes falling shut despite the fight you put up. He thanked you and headed for the front door.
On his path there he ran into an Avox. He told her Mavvy needed to be within calling distance of you at all times today. Her lips twitched for a second before she schooled it that told him he was talking to Mavvy. The Avox nodded in understanding and he left for work. 
When he returned from work, you were still in bed. You had changed positions in bed, laying on your side with a book open. In the corner of the room was the Avox he spoke to this morning, sat in a wooden chair and reading her own book. You lifted your head when the door opened, smiling at Coriolanus brightly. It must've been a really boring day if you were this excited over seeing him.
Coriolanus spent the rest of the evening in bed with you. He asked Mavvy to tell the rest of the maids and butlers that dinner was going to be served in the bedroom that night. He liked eating dinner with you at the table, but he liked this much more. Coriolanus felt like you two were actually a loving married couple. You were more relaxed this way, laughing and cracking jokes that made him snort.
If he didn't know you barely liked him as a friend, he would've kissed you. Coriolanus was okay with this though, laughing with you and eating your dinner in the exquisite bedding.
Part two
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berryzxx · 2 months ago
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✋⚠STOP AND READ YALL
Hi idk where to start with this but recently i've learnt a lesson and it is to STAY SAFE ON THE FUCKING INTERNET. PEOPLE ARE NOT WHO THEY SAY THEY ARE.
So why do i say this? Well I had a great friend I made @ cupiddoe (she's obviously blocked me) and we used to talk alot. On discord too. Now after talking to her a few months and learning about how she was "19 years old, about to get married, is tunisian, a hijabi" and sending me a face reveal I thought omg i know her so well! She's one of my greatest friends on tumblr.
WRONG.
A friend of mine found the ig page of a hijabi egyptian influencer who looks exactly the same as "cupiddoe" (aka kmar). Now why do they look the same? Because kmar has been using her photos and pretending to be someone she's not. Lets mention some of the many things she's lied about her age (99% sure she's a minor and not 19), what she looks like, her marriage and basically a lot of other shit she's spoken to me about.
Yes I could expose her with screenshots right now. I have evidence. I have proof. But no i'm not going to spend that much time and effort on someone like her. So instead I'm kindly asking you all to either report her account or unfollow her because she's probably spewing the same lies to you too. I'm not doing this because i'm a hater i'm doing this because I don't want anyone to fall in the same trap.
Some of you may ask "Berry why tf were u so gullible?" and thats a great question! I dont know. I just am and i feel used. I spent so much of my time talking to her and today when i tried asking her who she really was and what her real intentions were (i was extremely polite if i do say so myself) she replied with a simple "okay". I'm not doing this so yall send her hate, im doing this to inform you and so you understand the dangers of being online and also to maybe stay away from her? I can't force you to buttt yeah <3
Tagging people to spread the message and people who knew her:
@thelov3lybookworm @merwgue @rxsewqter @hijabi-desi-bookworm @achaotichuman @nnanscy
@wavetotheangels @ghosttownheart @readychilledwine @viktoriaashleyyx @cassie6392
@tsunami-of-tears @never-enough-novels @fell-in-luvs @book-girl4evaaa @im-on-crack-send-help
The point of this post is to spread awareness and remind people that not everyone is who they say they are <3
Also yes I have messaged the actual girl on ig and so has a friend to notify her. I'm not going to share her ig because it's unfair on her <3
and if you really don't believe me i can send proof but i dont see the point in that
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imustbenuts · 5 days ago
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nuts reads trigun in jp 14 - trimax' vol 1 theme is big on family
i mean, thats obvious, but it didn't ping on my radar as much until im sitting here chewing on what im reading.
ive written in part 7 with the first hint of filial piety, 12 with a lost in translation bit about vash calling sheryl and lina his family, and 13 where wolfwood comes across as a guy who is taking someone's child(daughter) away to elope for marriage. the tl;dr of all of this is that trimax' vol 1 seems to be a set up for exploring themes and what "family" can be defined as.
i uh, suspect japanese idea of 内外 uchi-soto is at play here. (ie in-group and out-group but family) it seems to be lowkey tied to that and the themes of 'otherism'. the kanjis for them means, in 内, and out 外.
the uchi 内 is the 'us', and it is most commonly used in the context of home and family.
the soto 外 is the others, the ones who aren't part of the family.
there's absolutely more ways uchi-soto can be used than just family. village, organization, etc.
so while i dont have a concrete answer of how fucked family dynamics exactly are in japan, i can say its at least pretty fucked in a lot of asian countries affected by ww2. this is further compounded by a lot of classism, traditionalism, trauma, shit mental healthcare, absurd rapid economic growth, the whole turd rainbow, that its not uncommon for many born in say 1900s to 1980s to be... pretty messed up.
i mean, the long term results of gunboat diplomacy, opium wars and colonialism will do all of that, yeah.
i think its why knives here vaguely gives me that abusive old asian turd vibe:
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domestic abuse is... not exactly uncommon, honestly. again, dont live in japan so i wont pretend to know for sure, but similar culture and the same capitalism trajectory makes me think its got similar trends. also a lot of these DVs can rooted in toxic masculinity, power trips, ego, and anxiety surrounding productiveness/money.
yeehaw:
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(quick note: another reading of 内 uchi can be nai. is that why studio orange named him nai....??? 🤔 and gave him a onesies pajamas and made him a hikkikomori?)
so thats knives. he kicks and slaps his little brother around and even cuts off his arm to the point that a lot of vash's behavior can come across as an abuse victim survivor. he shares the uchi with vash and their sister plants, while everyone else alive on NML is the soto. the outsiders.
and then vash seems to define his own 'uchi' as... the entirety of humanity, or at least an uchi with no 'soto'. no outsiders than maybe himself. its debatable if you want to read this as a result of his abuse, if vash inherently leans towards this, or a mix of the two. like how things are depicted in stampede.
i think the characters that highlight these themes nicely are Sensei/Doc and Brad. im skipping and not rehashing stuff from my prev post, but yeah its. all there.
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.... Of course I would We're family (身内). And it's all the same to him. Vash The Stampede's concept of "family (身内)" is absurdly wide.
i mean, check out brad's bubble in here where the Family is expressed as 身内 miuchi. more in the tone of "one of ours". nightow could have just used a bunch of other words like 家族 kazoku, 親身 shinmi, 親戚 shinseki that leans closer to blood family, but nah. nightow just picks 身内, with the 内 to highlight the in group out group family culture dynamic going on.
this is then followed up with this panel
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man.
i wanna whack knives with a steel chair.
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paintedkinzy-88 · 2 months ago
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(So sorry i feel like im spamkmg yoyr ask box but i just rotate this au around in my brain like microve)
So i was checking out the posts linked through your coi au master post, and this part:
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Did this this cut more deep than Donnie intended? Like does Leo still think about this one line even months past? Like does he think, as hes going on his nightly falling/flying sesions how his brothers couldnt even think of leaving april behind but didn't hesitate to leave him behind
Meanwhile donnie and bros dont see it that that. They see leo as equal, even without wings, they never once thought of it as leaving him behind. Because hes their brother, theyd NEVER leave him behind.
But then that got me thinking... did they accidentally like ACTUALLY leave leo behind that first night donnie made his wings. Cause i can see donnie and the ither two being caught up in the joy of flying together for the first time, maybe going too fast for leo to keep up on the rooftops, cementing the idea in his head that his bros dont need him.
This is long winded lol i just got angst on my mind 😭
Spam me all you want!! I may not be able to promise I’ll get to every ask I ever receive, I just don’t have that time, but I CAN promise that I see, read, and overthink everything anyone sends me (ง’̀-‘́)ง So send away!!
As for your question: Absolutely, yes, that moment struck Leo down to his core — but not like. Personally. He knows Donnie didn’t mean it like that! Realistically, he understands that his brothers/sister care just as much about him as he does about them. They’d never purposefully leave him behind!! At the end of the day, he trusts that, should he ever get seriously knocked down, his family would turn right back around to help him get back up.
But he still has a MAJOR barrier that he sees between them. One that Donnie AND April are now able to literally fly over. And now that he’s outnumbered, that wall feels even higher than before. He’s not alone, not ever, but it certainly feels like it sometimes…
And all of that is exactly why he doesn’t want to say anything. He not only feels a little silly to have this impossible dream in the first place (his hoard is literally birds and butterflies and shit, that’s so weird and pathetic, isn’t it???), but he doesn’t WANT them to worry about him. He doesn’t want them to turn tail and come back just to make sure he’s keeping up with them. He can’t hold them back like that!
It’s better to pretend he’s on the same level, train himself into the ground (even literally if that’s what it takes) to prove he’s on the same level, make them focus on his stellar swimming skills that are (to them) on par to their flying, than for them to ever realize that all he’ll ever do is look up at them from below.
Also, yes, after Dee made his first fully functioning flight pack, they all went on a quick flight around the city. April was the one to suggest they move it to the ocean so Leo could at least keep up with them and cheer them on…
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sabakos · 2 months ago
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i mean dont get me wrong, being a visual artist kinda sucks, like its a lot of work to develop your skills and you have devote a lot of time to it in order to get better.
which means that if you've been doing that since you were five and now you're 25 and you meet a 15 year old that is clearly better than you who says that they've only been drawing for a few months.... uh, naturally you want to kill them and yourself. but you also have to bite your tongue because hating on another artist, especially one younger than you, looks to everyone else exactly like the sort of cope that it is, and to their credit most other artists find the crab-bucket mentality distasteful, no matter how much they secretly engage in it themselves. so you've gotta repress that urge.
meanwhile, enter the stupid robot that will let anyone make halfway decent art, even "techbros" who don't know enough basic rules of composition to tell when it fucks up, who don't care enough to notice when the fingers are all mangled or the eyes are wrong. you couldn't hate on the talented teenagers, but these techbros and their stupid robot seem like they might be acceptable targets by your standard, its not like they worked very hard for this. and now some of them are winning art contests against actual human artists!
but of course normal people who arent artists dont understand and still think you look crazy for shouting about something that doesnt affect you, so you gotta come up with a reason why this is harming you. maybe it's going to take your future job. maybe its "stolen" art and the law should be changed to make it a copyright violation. maybe it's bad for the environment. maybe its... not really art somehow? now, none of these excuses are very convincing and all of them fall apart under further examination, but maybe if you come up with enough of them and sound sufficiently angry about it, perhaps no one will notice the flaws, and the AI art will all go away and you can go back to pretending not to hate anyone younger than you. hey when was the last time you drew anything anyway?
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thepalaceofharuhime · 11 months ago
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Hmmm…
Looking at your fandoms, I can’t help but think some sort of Bingqiu in Spy X Family (or a SxF Xianxia fusion) could be super fun!
The question is… what would their roles be.
Assassin Luo Binghe, or spy Luo Binghe… and which of them gets gender swapped. 🤔
Oh!! Maybe Shen Yuan was meant to be an ally of the female half of the main duo, Liu Mingyan, but through shenanigans he somehow ends up with her role instead, and the System demands he fake marry Binghe anyway. 😂
This is exactly the kind of prompt i was hoping for! TY!!! 🙏
The way i see it Binghe would definitely be the assassin, Shen Yuan is too big of a softie not to mention one who so easily put on the mask of another man before so he would definitely be the spy.
But also being oblivious to feelings yet a capable badass, bad in the kitchen, feeling inadequate as a partner? All Shen Yuan. Binghe with his protagonist Halo meanwhile would fit better with Mr. All around perfect Husband. So i guess it'd be a little like Yor and Loyd had switched professions.
Shen Yuan's over protective brother in a position of power? I wonder who that would be? Enter Shen Jiu haha. Rather than secret police he'd be a detective looking in to all the murders rather than keeping state secrets from spies though. To keep that rivalry between him Binghe. The family member Binghe became an assassin to provide for? His mom. The gardener AKA the guy who hired him and hands him his missions? Meng Mo. Franky,the spy's funny informant and gadget supplier, occasional babysitter and not to mention bestfriend? Shang Qinghua.
I dont know if i should replace Fiona with Liu Quinge as Fiona's character really would fit Binghe better. But Liushen is a weakness of mine even if onesided and those two were just made for coworker romances. Maybe I should give Binge someone trying to woe him too? Sha hualing? Then if i dont go with your other idea of having SY transmigrate in to Liu Mingyan (which i am saving up in my head because i absolutely love the idea) then i can add something in the background with her and Sha hualing. I'm positive i could find a way to write in Mobei for SQH or i could go with Scumplane and have him end up Shen Jiu and actually yeah that would work, need to distract SJ long enough for Bingyuan to get it on afterall. Oh what about SQH x SJ x LQG? Or should Shen Yuan get a second husbandafterall? Alternatively imagine LQG crying over a bowl of icecream.
Next question is if SY didnt transmigrate into LMY then who is he? What about Ning Yingying? Who could be SJ's little sister in this world? Or he couldve just been put in there as a female version of himself. Or like it was with Shen quingiu a character who vaguely resembles him and has a similar name. She just happens to be a woman though. Or maybe go with the mulan aproach and have him crossdress? But then how does he explain to his brother that he's suddenly - he could say that he's in love with binghe and the only way to marry him was fake his papers to pretend to be a woman since queer marriage isnt yet allowed in their fictional country. Like no one cares if they date its just they havent gotten to the legalisation of marriage yet. And if SJ asks why they had to get married so suddenly anyway (cuz no way in hell is SY getting away with saying he forgot to tell him for a year) he could say that they had to so they could adopt their daughter. Who in this case scenario could be Ning Yingying, should she still have Anyas powers? damian could be Ming fan or the little palace girl or whatever (im not yet far enough in the books to now her and the old man that well so id have to check the wiki) and i could make the palace master donovan desmond and have SY and LBH team up to take him down in the end.
Anyways yeah these are just some ideas, and again thanks for the prompt! I can't wait to write this! Maybe i'll draw something for it later too. ❤️
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noctilu-uca · 22 days ago
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Rei Amayado and Love.
fgghhgggghhh....
Ok so ik there are a lot of unknowns about rei and honestly im no where near qualified enough to talk about ANY of the hypmic characters in the detail im about to go. But i like to think i know a decent amount of info and lore to make a good assumption. I could be totally wrong about some things soo pllleeeaassseeee dont take me entirely seriously
But the conversation between rei and nayuta confirmed a lot of things for me. A lot of things i was speculating that i havent really seen anyone else talk about
In the drama track, rei comes to the realization that he lets himself shoulder everything despite having the support that he could turn to rely on. Even when nayuta was still awake and with him, he had the bad habit of pushing everything onto himself.
The line that really stood out to me was nayuta asking if he was going to play the villain, to which he responds with a curt "yes" and this. Right there. Is exactly what ive been thinking this entire time.
Its really nothing new that ohhh rei is the bad guy hes morally grey hes hurt people You Shouldnt Really Trust Him. And rosho denounces all of that with pushing sasara to think "who is he really?" now i know that whole portion was supposed to lead sasara into his own growth but seriously. Who is rei? They knew he was a conman, they knew he was shady, unserious, and pushed things off. But rosho says that it was just a persona he built up, and hes correct.
We all knew rei was a deeper character than they let on, it was obvious to us, but not to them. Though its still kinda funny sasaro just said "yeah we guessed" when he said he was bb's father LMAOAOAOAOA not slick at all... but anyways where am i going with this ?
Rei has quite obviously put up a persona to the people around him. He doesnt want to be suspected, he doesnt want people knowing too much about him. So he pretends. That whole comical uncle spiel was just a means of hiding from everyone, and most importantly, himself. I dont think he really wants to face his reality. Of course he takes responsibility and is *painfully* aware of it, but he doesnt seem like he wants to accept it. Now im mostly talking about nayuta here, in the dt he said he would do basically whatever it took to keep nayuta by his side when she mentioned her not being there anymore. And what is he doing now? Keeping her comatose body on publicly unknown island to protect her, and watch over her state.
What about his kids? As far as im aware theres no reason we were given for him leaving bb. Hes accepted the fact hes nolonger an important part of their lives, sure hes important to a degree, but not in a parental way. Im sure its fair to assume he left bb around the time nayuta was sent comatose. So what i think: he left for their own safety.
He left them to make sure they wouldnt get wrapped up in the politics he did. Their mother got hurt, whose to say chuuohku wouldnt target his children next? They knew what was important to him, so he forced himself to think of them as unimportant. He left them so they wouldnt meet the same fate, nayuta is gone, he cant have her children following.
But that was when they were young. Now that they are more grown, things have changed. They are drb participants, and isnt the whole point of the drbs to train potential true hypnosis mic users? Those mics? The mics that kill users? Why would he allow that? I personally think that its just a matter of "they are grown, they can make their own decisions." mixed with "they could possibly survive it and help me create nayutas ideal world."
Even before the 2nd drb, dont you think it was odd how he randomly came to jirosabu one day and revealed that he was their father? What were the motives? Ive always interpreted it as him helping them in his own odd way. He knew their bonds were strong, so maybe if he gives them a challenge, he could strengthen those bonds while simultaneously pushing himself away. Which woah !! Exactly what he did. Jiro got some really good character developmemt out of that one, and bb started resenting him even more. Keeping them together is his goal, afterall its all they have.
So he got what he wanted. He pushed those that he loved and cherished away to protect them from his issues. So... Whats up with sasara and rosho? Notoriously, he told them almost nothing about himself. But with this new dt he revealed EVERYTHING. A new level of intimacy for our current time rei. He was vulnerable with them, when he was so used to makimg other vulnerable.
I think his relationship with sasaro is very healing for him. For all of them, actually, both he and sasara have a tendency to push others away for either their protection, or his own protection. And rosho is a catalyst of "thats so stupid wtf" and is essentially helping them find themselves after he found his own self.
Of course human growth is always happening, rosho is no where near done growing. As we see in the dt he is growing right in front of us, gaining more confidence in himself. And sasara and rei are still so far from really allowing themselves to grow. In a way, they are ashamed for their lack of growth. Sasara getting antsy over the fact rosho pointed out his habit of never getting involved. And rei reflecting back on nayuta when he just got done actively pushing sasaro away. Nayuta was the only person who *actually* forced him to think of different perspectives and not rot in his own.
While nayuta is gone, sasara and rosho are good stand ins. Will he love them like he loved her ?? NO !!! That man is a wife lover through and through. But theres one thing about hypmic that i absolutely adore, and its their utilization of platonic love. Rei is slowly learning to cherish sasara and rosho just as they are him. Its obvious sasaro already cherish and love each other on some level, with sasara immediately thinking of roshos dreams when met with his own to start comedy with him again. He didnt want to enroach on roshos new found identity. And rosho, pushing sasara to find his own new identity. And so many more examples.
But with rei, he stopped himself from cherishing and loving, keeping himself in the past where the only person he has ever, truly, loved with his whole heart resided. So when met with two people who had a bond like he once did, he stayed stagnant and kept himself where he was. That was, until they forced him not to.
So who is rei? Rei amayado, Rei yamada. I think he is a man that loves, truly loves.
Everything that he does was done from a place of care. Was he perfect? No. Not at all. Ramuda exists now, but to him that was a side point in getting nayuta back, and creating their shared world. He did it for nayuta, everything for nayuta. Because he loved her. And absolutely still does. He did it for his children, because in some way he still cares. Even if he acts like he doesnt. And now he is continuing on for his strengthening bonds with sasara and rosho, because they are giving him a chance to recount himself, and find out who he wants to be in his future. He isnt done living despite his old age, he has so much more to do and figure out, things he thought he could only do with nayuta by his side. Of course he wants her back, desperately, he truly thought she would never leave him. But now she has, and even though she isnt with him, he has the opportunity to restart with sasara and rosho. And hopefully be a changed man when nayuta comes back.
Rei, no matter what name he takes, is a man who loves, and will continue loving.
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viennajoell · 1 year ago
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Love triangle
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You see it was never my intention to fall for a hockey player let alone two hockey players.
My dad was the head coach of the MSU football team.
So I always had a think for football guys.
But that was until i met Rutger and Mark, who play for the Umich hockey team.
I met Rutger after a away game while i was waiting for my dad.
He was with some friends and pointed at me to them.
I pretended I didn't notice and continued to act busy on my phone.
He leaned on the wall across from me and so did his friends.
"Great game yeah?" He says breaking the awkward silence. "Yup" i nod. "You go here?" He asks. I turn off my phone and look at myself up and down, i was decked out in MSU apparel. "Yeah" i reply. "Funny" he laughs. "Mhm" i hum. "Not very talkative eh?" He smiles. "I am just not to you" i reply. He laughs and pulls out his phone then hands it to me. I just stare at him knowing exactly what he wants. "Oh come on don't make me beg" he jokes. "Maybe i like when you beg" i jokingly flirt. His eyes go wide, I chuckle and type my number into his phone then hands it back to him. "See you around sometime?" He asks. "Maybe" i reply. We both smile as him and his friends walk away.
And that's how the whole Rutger thing started.
Ever since that we would go to every sports game that our schools played against each other together.
We were never official just more of a fling.
He asked me to go to one of his games that was against MSU so of course i went.
And that how i met Mark...
I was in the tunnel waiting for him but Mark comes out first.
We lock eye contact and as cliche as it sounds we both felt something.
We talked for a bit but he wouldn't ask for my number so i took out my phone and gave it to him.
He smiles and types his number in.
"Alright see ya" he waves after we talk some more. "Bye" i reply. I smile to myself and then remember why i was here.  I immediately cringe and feel dirty for what i did but soon enough got over it.
Me and Rutger were not official so might as well keep my options open you know?
Rutger soon comes out of the tunnel and invites me to a party.
I obviously go.
Rutger kept me by his side for most of night until i went to get a refill.
And thats when i saw Mark.
We lock eyes. He excuses himself and makes his way over here.
"Didn't expect to see you here" he says. "Well if there's a party im gonna be there" i reply. "Even if you dont go here?" He smiles. "That's not important" i reply. "So you here with anyone?" He asks. I think to myself for a bit before responding with "just a friend"
One thing led to another and then i was in bed naked with him asleep next to me.
I pry his arm off of my torso and sneak out.
And if it was on cue Rutger was walking down the sidewalk i was standing on waiting for my Uber.
"Hey!" He says which catches my attention. "Oh uhm hi" i say a little flustered. "What are you doin here?" He asks. "Uh I stayed with a friend" i reply. "A friend?" He raises his eyebrow. "Yes a friend, she let me stay the night" i say really empathizing on she. He smiles and nods. "Want me to wait with you?" He asks. "It's okay they should be here soon" i reply. "Alright then text me later" he says beginning to walk away. "I will" i reply.
I make it back to my dorm and immediately pass out.
I wake up to missed texts from both Mark, and Rutger.
Marks read
"Had fun last night see you again?"
And Rutgers said
"Make it home?"
I reply a simple yes to them and move on with my day.
The more days that pass the more i fell for both of them.
Rutger is so fun and laid back and Mark is so sweet.
Mark invited me to a party after another game and i went.
He had his arm around me the whole time.
Everything was going great until Rutgers friends came over.
Their happy expressions soon turned into confused ones.
"Hey y/n" one of them says. "Hey" i say awkwardly. "You know them?" Mark asks. "Something like that" i reply. "Excuse me can we talk to you for a minute" one of them said who later I found out was Seamus.
"The hell are you doing?" He asks. "I don't know what are you doing?" I reply. "I thought you were with Rutger" he replies. "We're just friends" i reply. "Well he doesn't think that" he replies. "What?" I ask confused. "Oh my god he likes you" he says sounding frustrated. "Yeah I know" I respond. "Then why are you with Mark?!" He says loudly. "Shhh me and Rutger are friends and so is me and Mark" i say turning to walk away but he grabs my wrist. "If you don't tell them i will" he threatens. I stay silent. "Or break it off with one of them" he adds. I nod and walk back to Mark.
"Hey you alright?" He asks. "Yeah just tired, i think im going to go home" i reply. "Want me to come with?" He asks. "No its okay" i give him a soft smile and walk out of the house.
-
It's since been days from the party and I still haven't told them or broke it off with anyone.
They both of been trying to get plans to meet up but I keep finding excuses to not go which both of them has caught on to.
I get a DM from Seamus saying that he's telling Rutger right now and that he warned me what was going to happen.
Soon after Rutger calls.
I nervously accept.
"Tell me he's lying" he says as soon as I pick up. "Rutger" im at a loss of words. I can hear him sigh heavily. "Y/n" he groans. "I know" i say. "I really liked you" he replies. "I really like you" i say sounding desperate. "And Mark" he snarks back. "Yeah and Mark" i admit. "I texted him, he hasn't replied" he replies. I sigh wanting to cry. "Listen I want to be more, it's either me or Mark" he says. I stay quiet. "Ill be waiting if you decide its me" he replies. I nod forgetting that he can't see me. He sighs once more before hanging up.
A couple tears slip then my phone rings.
It's mark
I answer just wanting to get this over with.
"Y/n" he says sounding disappointed. "I know" i say, voice shaky. "Im just going to get straight to the point, i want you so make up your mind on who you want" he says. I don't reply cause im at a loss for words. "Im going to go now but I'll always answer if you reach out" he says before hanging up not even letting me get a word in.
I have two boys that want me and i want both of them.
What the hell am i going to do?!
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bonew3s · 1 year ago
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a short ink sans character essay—
a short ink sans character essay (? can i even call it that i barely scratched the surface)
( Ink is made by @comyet, here is the faq i will be referencing often; https://comyet.tumblr.com/post/132998265968/i-n-k-t-a-l-e — and here is this whole thing crossposted on ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/49854430 )
His soulessness—
hes soulless yes and he uses his vials to feel, comyet had mentioned he pretended to have a soul— not to have feelings. He feels things even if he needs his vials to do so they're still his emotions. Ink vomits when he feels too much, that doesnt sound very emotionless does it? Ink technically isn't emotionless. He cant understand emotions, yes, but he feels them. He cant go off his vials without kind of, dying/ going comatose. Comyet said he became a lifeless husk without them— not emotionless.
Ink is a bit of a jerk, that will obviously happen if someone doesnt have a good grasp on feelings or social ques— yes im bringing up social ques now.
Social ques, are usually hand in hand with emotions, they're connected. Okay, expanding on this— lets say, someone is sad the thing someone would do is comfort them, judge the situation yes? but its so much more complicated than that, you have to read ques wether they want to talk about it, you cant ask " do you want to talk about it?" because they might not want you to point it out— or maybe they want you to point it out and end up getting mad when you dont, youre trapped all because you cant read what that person wants with their body langauge becaus people are so unpredictable.
I got a little carried away there but you get the point yeah?
I mean, ink's gonna be a jerk, purposefully or not either way cause he doesnt have a good grasp on emotions thats how his character is, him being soulless or insensitive doesnt make him an evil character, hes complex thats how people in real life are.
I just hate when people automatically think soulless= evil, cause thats not true, maybe in canon undertale it is— but undertale aus arent canon thats why that doesnt apply, also ink is different from flowey because of his vials, flowey is alive because of determination that landed on his dust and the flowers near it, there wasnt any dt in inks case (that we know of) — and flowey pretends to have feelings, ink doesnt.
In inks faq, comyet mentions ink being emotional more than once, when mentioning his rainbow freckles he has when hes positivly emotional, and vomiting ink when hes emotionly shaken.
point being—Ink isnt emotionless he feels too much, hes not evil hes not exactly well behaved but he isnt downright evil. Everyone is morally grey, real life and fiction thats what makes it realistic and intresting, everyone has different perspectivs, opinons etc and that makes people morally grey.
"He is an insecure, self-centered character with abandonment issues who has a hard time trusting his emotions." again the word emotions pop up, and not just emotions his emotions. Those are inks flaws, and that gives perspective on his worldview, it makes sense, that he views other aus as just characters, he sees so many of them its better to disconnect himself right? The thing with abandonment issues is that it causes a feeling that everyone will leave you so its better you leave them— or disconnect youself from them, before they leave you.
Okay, lets talk about his past now, he was stuck in an abandoned au, he hated it so much and it was so blank that he didnt see any other way out than killing himself. He ripped his soul apart. He felt such great despair and hopelessness that he took his very being in tore into it, dusting instantly— and smiled as he dusted. It was worded as he "broke free", in a sense he did, but Ink didnt know he would be granted another chance, i dont think thats what it meant by broke free, because right after that it says he was given another chance. Ink didn't know what would happen after he died, in his mind death was better than being alone, being forgotten. I have a feeling that Ink not remembering his past, isnt just his regular spotty memory, i have a feeling it was a repressed memory— because some of it still carries over to him, like his fear of blank spaces, and being forgotten. Its somewhat similar to anniversary reactions, where someone doesnt even have to remember it, their subconcoius and body remember enough for feelings to peak through. Its not exactly aniversary reactions for Ink because there was no time in his au— point is his feeling still carry over even if he doesnt remember his actions. Ink is traumatized. Its so clear in his personality, quirks — everything. I hate when people completly brush over his past even if he doesnt remember it because in real life people block out traumatic events too!!! it still happend!!
his abandonment issues, insecurities, fears and overall flaws reflect that.
Ink isnt evil, comyet literally said he was a chaotic neutral.
basically im sick of people overlooking Ink— esp when people overlook is faq and past.
(i might add more to this later/someday idk cuz it is a little on the short side [alot on the short side] and i only coverd a quarter of what i wanted.)
update (9/13/23); okay, when i wrote this my thoughts were kinda everywhere despite how much i tried to organize this, its messy and i did not cover alot.
here i am coming to drop more info onto this, ok.
basically on ao3, someone had mentioned that the better wording for inks memory regarding the negatives of his past can be described better with dissociative amnesia, which supports my claim about ink being traumatized. (I assume that it would be nearly impossible for an emotionless person to have trauma, once again proving he does have emotions) But of course, if someone wants to write/portray ink as an evil character i am not the boss of you, i just hate when people think ink being an emotionless evil guy is canon when its not, he is traumatized. Trauma and abandonment issues can make people seem rude, act rude and we see that in inks character, and personally i think thats what makes him awesome. Ink is relatable and realistic, trauma does not carve a perfect angel of a person, trauma is ugly and rough, though i am not saying that every person with trauma is going to be rude of course, but no one is perfect.
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ssuperficialspacecadett · 2 years ago
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i headcannon that benny and reader blast rihanna while closing the gym. it becomes a tradition that they blast music and dance around while closing. it gets to the point that the boys start wondering why benny keeps being late to their hangouts after his work. at some point they catch benny blowing his back out and reader recording and laughing at benny
Benny, Better Have My Money
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Chapter Five | Drabble for the Through the Scope series | Chapter Six
*best read in between chapter 5 & 6*
Rating: IDK ?? everyone ??
Word Count: 1029
TW: tooth rotting friend fluff w/ Benny & some ass throwing ?!?!
Notes: anon, i wish i could kiss that beautiful brain of yours for thinking of this absolutely fucking hilarious scene thats now 100% canon in the through the scope series to me HAHAHA !! i hope i did some justice to your brilliant idea & thank u so so much for submitting it ((: this one is for u ! happy reading <3
*i wrote this w/o looking over it because the idea was just to good so if you see any grammatical errors.. no you dont*
— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —
Closing up after a long shift was never fun. Well, it was never fun until you started working for Benny. After the last guests were ushered out and the doors were locked, you were put in charge of the gyms music. It was only fair since Benny had free reign during operating hours after all. Plus, your taste in music wasn’t exactly family friendly. 
“Alright, what are we feeling this evening? Lady Gaga? Megan Thee Stallion? Doja Cat? Maybe some Rico Nasty? What artist really says ‘I want to clean this whole gym and look hot while doing it’ to you?” 
“The evening song choices are all yours. I’m way too tired to even think about makin’ another decision right now.”
“Well,” You say as you start scrolling through artists on his phone to find one that will bring the energy that both of you need to get this done. “If you’re so tired, why are you going out with the guys after this?” 
“You know that doesn’t count.” He’s currently working his way through cloroxing all the workout benches and weights. “The only decision I have to make when I’m there is if I want another drink or not and that's easy. Of course I want another fuckin’ drink!” 
“Touché,” You laugh as you find the perfect playlist for the evening. “Let’s get this cleaning party started!” 
Rhianna’s Bitch Better Have My Money starts blasting at full volume from the gym's speakers as you make your way over to the basket full of used towels. 
Bitch, better have my money
Y’all should know me well enough
Bitch, better have my money
Please don’t call me on my bluff
Pay me what you owe me
“Oh fuck yeah! I love Rhianna!” He yells as he turns to you. 
You pull out a towel, point to him from across the gym, and start swinging it over your head as you lip sync to the song playing. 
Kamikaze if you think that you gon’ knock me of the top
Shit, your wife in the back seat of my brand new foreign car
Don’t act like you forgot
I call the shot, shot, shots.
Benny makes finger guns and pretends to fire them at you on each beat. “Sing it, girl!”
The two of you run dramatically to each other in the middle of the gym and start dancing like crazed animals. Each of your tasks having been long forgotten as soon as the music started. You both know by now that neither one of you will be leaving anytime soon.
***
“Where the fuck is your brother, Will?” Pope huffs.
Frankie, Pope, and Will have all been waiting at their table for Benny to show up for 45 minutes now. They turned the waitress away three times before they caved and ordered a round for themselves. Hoping that a light buzz would satiate them.
“I’ve been texting him, but he’s not answerin’!” Will explains. “His location says that he’s still at the gym.” He turns his phone screen over to show the others.
“This is the third time this week that he’s been late. He’s never taken this long to close up before.” Frankie adds. 
Pope tips his almost empty beer bottle in his direction and nods. “Fuck this. Finish y’alls drinks and let's go pay him a visit.”
They all do as Pope orders and make their way out of the bar. As they cross the street and enter the gym’s parking lot they see both yours and Benny’s cars in the same spots that they were in this morning. All of the lights in the building are still on as well. 
“Do y’all hear that?” Frankie asks the men walking next to him. “It sounds like -”
“Rhianna?” Pope says curiously. 
All three of them walk up to the gym doors and the sight that greets them will be burned into each and every one of their minds for all eternity. 
***
You’re currently holding onto one of the corner poles from the boxing ring with both hands and trying to explain to Benny how to shake his ass.
“Move your hips to the right, then the left, then shimmy down, and use your knees to help you bring your ass up and down!” You’re winded from both teaching your lesson and singing with Benny for almost an hour straight. It also doesn’t help that you’re trying to yell instructions over Rhianna’s S&M song.
“I think I got it now! Let me try!” 
He helps you down so he can climb up and get into position. You pick up your towel and phone off a nearby workout bench. There is no way that you aren’t going to document this moment.
‘Cause I may be bad, but I’m perfectly good at it
Sex in the air, I don’t care, I love the smell of it
Stick and stone may break my bones
“But chains and whips excite me!” You and Benny sing together.
You are struggling to hold your phone still as you record because you can’t stop laughing. Benny is throwing everything, and you mean everything, into his one man performance on the edge of the boxing ring. He definitely paid attention to what you showed him. Even put his own little twist on it by bringing his right hand back to slap his ass. You can’t help but get swept away in it all and you start hitting him in the ass with your towel as well.
“Let’s go, Benny! Shake that shit for me!” Your lungs threaten to burst from over exhaustion. 
S-S-S&M-M-M
S-S-S&M-M-M
Oh, I love the feeling you bring to me
Oh, you turn me on
***
“Should we tell them we are here?” Will ask hesitantly, still not entirely sure what he’s watching.
“I’m not even sure what we would say if we told them.” Frankie quips as he wishes you would get back up and dance again. “Pope?”
He looks to his left and sees him pulling up your contact information. “Let’s tell them that their audience wants an encore.” Pope presses ‘call’ and puts the phone to his ear with a devious grin.
— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —
{tag list: @cutesyscreenname @rsquared31 @smol-beb @bitchwitch1981 @avastrasposts @hoeslingz @saltybutteredtoast @javicstories @c-justhere @pimosworld @modernperplexity @beboldbebravethings @modernperplexity  @mxtokko  @moonliqhtszn @tanzthompson @megcads @myloveistoolittle @casa-boiardi @jitterbugs927 @partyofone3413 @pedrit0-pascalit0 }
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iamunabletothinkofablogname · 6 months ago
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Hey what's going on friend?
You want to talk about it?
/nf /genq
i keep getting bullied but today was especially bad it is a long story, but if your okay with listening, also eitherway thank you
first these dudes in my class kept making weird comments ['do you want to [-] me', 'does she know how to talk? Do i have to sign to you?', and meowing and making yippee noises at me] and similar shit,then the girl behind me kept kicking my chair and tugging at my keychain [alastor] even after i told her to stop and so i couldn't focus on anything, the teacher moved me from my spot [i dont have any friends at the school so i wasnt talking to anyone, but she was changing up the seating plan which was kind of annoying since my brain is so used to going and sitting on that exact spot and so my brain had to load it but i could deal with that honestly, its just the combination of this and other shit]. I kept hearing my name whispered around but i didnt know why or what since i have shitty hearing so it didnt hurt as much but still wasnt exactly fun Then when i went to the bathroom girls were kicking and punching at the door to get it to open and i had to just sit there silently until they went away, and when they went away they closed the lights and closed both doors [the toilet has 2/3 mini hallways since its the 'fancy' one], and so i had to spend most of break feeling around the walls to get out and find the light because it was one of my first times using the upstairs one. and of course this triggered a fucking panick attack because why wouldnt it and of course instead of being maybe a tad empathetic, they started laughing [maybe because of how i looked? idfk]. and then we went to the assembally [assembelly?] for some random ass speech by the principal which i couldnt hear because, again, people were tugging at my bag and after i pushed a girls hand away she started insulting me and my looks/personality and started fucking meowing at me, which her and her friends found 'hillarious' and then the bell rang and so i had to just ignore that and go to the pickup area, when i was there there were already some students talking to my youngest sister and insulting her bcus they knew she was my sister and she started crying which hurt more because she's 7 and she had no beef with them other than being my sister :I this all happened today and i had to just pretend nothing happened at home because my mum wont do anything and she certainly wont let me go back to my old school and sorry if this is a bit a lot /gen i am very overwhelmed right now
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