#<-do they think alastor is a furry?????????????

[iamunabletothinkofablogname]

Hey what's going on friend?

You want to talk about it?

/nf /genq

i keep getting bullied but today was especially bad it is a long story, but if your okay with listening, also eitherway thank you

first these dudes in my class kept making weird comments ['do you want to [-] me', 'does she know how to talk? Do i have to sign to you?', and meowing and making yippee noises at me] and similar shit,then the girl behind me kept kicking my chair and tugging at my keychain [alastor] even after i told her to stop and so i couldn't focus on anything, the teacher moved me from my spot [i dont have any friends at the school so i wasnt talking to anyone, but she was changing up the seating plan which was kind of annoying since my brain is so used to going and sitting on that exact spot and so my brain had to load it but i could deal with that honestly, its just the combination of this and other shit]. I kept hearing my name whispered around but i didnt know why or what since i have shitty hearing so it didnt hurt as much but still wasnt exactly fun Then when i went to the bathroom girls were kicking and punching at the door to get it to open and i had to just sit there silently until they went away, and when they went away they closed the lights and closed both doors [the toilet has 2/3 mini hallways since its the 'fancy' one], and so i had to spend most of break feeling around the walls to get out and find the light because it was one of my first times using the upstairs one. and of course this triggered a fucking panick attack because why wouldnt it and of course instead of being maybe a tad empathetic, they started laughing [maybe because of how i looked? idfk]. and then we went to the assembally [assembelly?] for some random ass speech by the principal which i couldnt hear because, again, people were tugging at my bag and after i pushed a girls hand away she started insulting me and my looks/personality and started fucking meowing at me, which her and her friends found 'hillarious' and then the bell rang and so i had to just ignore that and go to the pickup area, when i was there there were already some students talking to my youngest sister and insulting her bcus they knew she was my sister and she started crying which hurt more because she's 7 and she had no beef with them other than being my sister :I this all happened today and i had to just pretend nothing happened at home because my mum wont do anything and she certainly wont let me go back to my old school and sorry if this is a bit a lot /gen i am very overwhelmed right now

[static-quo]

I had an idea and needed to get it out as soon as fucking possible-

(Just a wip but I think I may be on to something here- ówò)

[jinxed-sinner]

Alright here's my full (possibly hot) take on redesigning Hazbin Hotel characters and making a video showcasing those redesigns while you criticize the official designs.

First and foremost, you are redesigning someone else's OCs. Hazbin Hotel is, in essence, a passion project for Viv. How she talks about it makes that incredibly clear to me. The only difference between Hazbin Hotel and, for example, the story I'm developing surrounding some of my D&D OCs is that Hazbin Hotel got picked up by a streaming service and is significantly more popular than most passsion projects get.

Personally if someone wanted to redesign my D&D OCs, I wouldn't mind it, in fact I'd probably think it was really cool that someone would want to redesign one of my OCs to be closer to their tastes in terms of what they like to draw. I would, however, be made incredibly uncomfortable if someone made a video redesigning them where they also pointed out everything they thought was wrong with the designs. I didn't design these specific D&D characters to be 1-to-1 accurate to their classes in D&D or to look professionally designed. I designed them how I wanted them to look for the story I'm telling because I don't plan to ever play them in a campaign. The main character Avlan is a paladin, and I can acknowledge that his design might not look exactly like a paladin. One of the tabaxi in the story (Ice) is a bard and the other (Spark) is a ranger, and I acknowledge that their classes might not come across well in their designs. The single tiefling I've designed for this story (Tragedy) is a cleric but might not come off as one in their design. But I specifically designed them to be easy for me to draw because I want to be able to tell this story through my art. Having someone say "oh, Avlan's armor isn't paladin enough!" or "Avlan's fur colors and patterns should be closer to a wild rabbit's because harengon shouldn't be based on domestic rabbit colors!" would fucking hurt (especially because I'm so attached to Avlan, but it would hurt just as much if similar comments were made about Ice, Spark, or Tragedy). I am so passionate about these characters and being told their designs are bad or wrong in some way would be like a stab in the heart, and it would still feel like a stab in the heart if this story ever got a massive fandom behind it. Giving Avlan more complex armor because you think it'd look cool or just want to see what it'd look like? Sure, if I could draw more complex armor I'd give him more complex armor too. Giving him more complex armor but also shitting on the armor I decide to draw him with? My motivation to draw him in his armor, potentially draw him period, would be dead for WEEKS.

Why is it suddenly okay just because someone's passion project was picked up by Amazon Prime? Why is it suddenly okay to be "fixing" someone's character designs just because the project has a much bigger budget than most artists get and is on a popular streaming service? It's not. I don't care if you're a professional character designer, or think a specific character would look better with certain traits, or just don't like the character designs.

Hazbin Hotel is still Vivienne Medrano's passion project, and redesigning her characters and making videos talking about everything you think is "wrong" with them is, honestly, disgusting. You can make videos explaining your choices in your redesigns without putting down the designs that already exist, whether you like them or not. Me thinking Lucifer looks better with his tail not restricted to his full demon form doesn't suddenly mean I don't like his official design, because I fucking love it. If you wouldn't do it to an artist whose passion project is just a webcomic here on Tumblr, don't fucking do it to an artist whose passion project got picked up for a cartoon by a big streaming service (or any company for that matter).

[a-hazbin-reader]

HII

Could you do some hcs of alastor with wife!reader who ABSO(LUTE)LY adores dogs? (alastor hates the dog with his entire life)

I mean...he kinda has a good reason not to be a dog person...

😡

Alastor X Reader Headcanons

✅️Romantic

❌️Platonic

TW: Alastor Vs Doggo �� Cannibalism, Vox getting owned by dog

Description: ☝️⬆️

Look, Alastor loves you deeply and would do anything for you, absolutely anything

Except let you have a dog

Absolutely not, he won't have a dog running around in his hotel and creating problems

He can already see it

The dog using the hotel as it's personal bathroom, gnawing on his hooves and ruining all the furniture

Humping everything in sight!!

You can have anything else, you can have Niffty! She makes a good pet don't you think?

No

How about Husk? He's basically a cat

"Fuck you!"

You want a dog, you even have one picked out already

You what? When did you even have time to go look at dogs? He's been purposefully keeping you busy anytime you mention one

The bite marks all over your body are evidence of it

Totally doesn't believe you're actually bringing home a dog until you do, then he's spitting out his tea

"Y/N, darling, what is that?"

"A smoothie."

"You know what I mean."

"Oh this? Our new dog, isn't he cute?"

You can't have a dog in the hotel-

Charlie and everyone else already agreed to it, even Husk said yes just to piss off Alastor

So everyone is on your side and you'll have adequate help, Alastor won't hardly ever even notice the dog

Except he does notice the dog, like all the time

The damned beast is always trying to hop up next to him, only to be shoved off by Alastor

"No furry beasts on the furniture~ The hair is a nightmare to clean up. Disgusting really..."

Not Husk and Angel giving him dirty looks for that one

After a couple of unsuccessful attempts to sit next to him, it simply settles for resting by his feet

At least it makes a decent footrest

Or the dog is always hogging your attention, sitting in your lap, laying with you in bed, following you around

How is a man supposed to sleep with his wife when there's some mutt in his spot???

You've caught Alastor glaring at your dog a few times, especially when you're giving him scratches and pets

He wants to be the one to hog your lap and be pampered by you, maybe you could even try giving him a belly rub or two

It certainly looks appealing

Alastor at least thinks he can get time alone with you outside of the hotel but nope, you insist on taking the dog with you

"He needs the fresh air and exercise, Alastor!"

But your husband needs some alone time with you! He's not being dramatic!

Or he's trying to enjoy his breakfast?? Guess who's paws are on the table, begging and slobbering over the idea of a bite

"Absolutely not, you can just forget abou-HEY!"

Looks like his breakfast now belongs to the dog

You definitely make him another breakfast and apologize over and over again

Kiss him and sit in his lap, then maybe he'll consider forgiving you~

Sometimes, when you're sleeping, Alastor and the dog will be locked into a staring match

"I don't like you."

Whine

Rosie tries to sell him on the idea of just maybe liking this one dog, even she's taken a liking to him apparently

Traitor

You make Alastor promise that he won't ever get rid of the dog, OR EAT HIM, OR HURT HIM

And he can't break a promise he made to his darling wife

But he hates this fucking dog with a passion so when the dog suddenly gets out one day? He's perfectly content to let him run off

Until he realizes how upset you would be that your beloved pooch is gone and that gives him pause

Fffffffffuck

Not him spending all day trying to find a dog he doesn't even like, asking everyone if they've seen him

Nope, no, sorry no, ect

Just when Alastor has just about given up and started to contemplate trying to replace the mutt, he hears a familiar yell

"IS THIS DOG FUCKING PISSING ON ME!?"

Vox

Following the sound, Alastor is greeted with the sight of your dog running circles around Vox, who's standing in a puddle with wet pants

For some reason, the delightful mutt has taken to terrorizing him, biting at his limbs only to jump just out of reach of Vox's claws

Maybe it's something he's picked up from Alastor, you certainly didn't teach the dog that

The sight is too funny for Alastor, who doesn't even try to stop the dog, only laughing maniacally

Maybe this mutt isn't so bad

Later, when he comes home with the dog, you notice they seem much fonder of each other

Alastor goes and picks him out a fancy new leash, he starts giving him table scraps and he even invites the dog to be his footrest

Quit putting your feet on my dog

Stop giving the dog fingers!!

You catch him giving the pup a few scratches here and there, almost in an absent-minded manner

He starts calling the dog by his name instead of calling him beast, mutt, hound, monstrosity, ect

He even gives the dog his own room at the hotel with his own fluffy doggy bed

Okay, that last part might just be him wanting his marital bed back

We love dogs in this house!!

[anonymouscheeses]

Even more and more of obvious shit I point out because I want an excuse to rant while not interacting with actual people in real life who also like this show because I'm masking 😍💜💜

BARELY STARTED AND BRO. YOU JUST LET HER DO THAT TO YOU, ME PERSONALLY-

HE'S PETTING KEE-KEE I LOVE HIM SMM

HER HOOVES. I LOVE IT. NOT LIKE THAT, IM JUST A FURRY-

*grabs pen*

ANGRY CHARLIE FOR THE WIN. I LOVE WHEN THE HAPPY CHARACTER GETS ANGSTY (Cough. Luz. Cough).

The people writing fanfics where she gets FURIOUS. Omg. That was something I read. I LOVE MY FELLOW FANFIC WRITERS BUT OH MY- YALL REALLY HAD CHARLIE M A D.

"Uh-"

I love his reaction lmao look at his goofy face.

HER BOW BECAME HORNS (my "redesign" is now 100% worse)

SAD VAGGIE. THE BOW. DROOPY.

Oh and the angel dust fellow back there 🤯

I LOVE ROSIE SO MUCH HUH

Tall.

No explanation needed. <3

PLEASE HELP???

CUTIE PATOOTIE. I LOVE HER SM UGGHHH

CHARLIE HATES OLD PEOPLE COMFIRMED YAY 😍😍💅💅

Hot

That's it.

IN SYNC. I LOVE THIS SONG AND THE ENTIRE SCENE. WHY IS IT RANKED SO LOW WITH SOME OF YALL?? Okay well-

I thought this song was gonna be a Charlie and Vaggie duet- tbh I still preferred that BUT I LOVE CARMILLA SO I KINDA DONT CARE.

BUT I WAS ROBBED OF AN ACTUAL FULL CHAGGIE DUET (REPRISE DOESNT COUNT) IF H*SKERDUST GETS A FULL ONE WHY CAN'T CHAGGIE? *SOB* uhh anyway-

Is that. Like. How she thinks actually 😰

I know there's been a lot of the lack of Vaggie's self-worth, which I wish was explored into more. I just think the Vaggie(3rd) episode just wasn't needed at all if it didn't even have an impact. Don't get me started on that episode, it was rushed, too early to have character arcs already, and overall not needed or even should have existed periodt.

I hope they explore it next season because GOD this woman needs TO LOVE HERSELF. OR ATLEAST CARE ABOUT HERSELF LIKE????

SWEET MAMA PLEASE. TAKE ME IN YOUR WINGS AAAAAAAAA

Charlie, sharing is caring <3

Out of all the people I thought Charlie would vent to I didn't think it would be ROSIE. It's a nice surprise tho I love her <3

bisexuality.

That's it.

HE'S DANCING. ALASTOR IS DANCING. THEY ARE SLAYING BESTIES. THE MAN IS DANCING. HELP.

Season 2 is going to be Charlie in her villain era and Alastor's reputation era 😍

I LOVE VAGGIE'S FACE. PRECIOUS BABY UGHH... THEN THE WINGS REPLACE THE BOW AND DROOP UGGHH I HOPE IN SEASON 2 WE SEE MORE OF HER WINGS. OR CUT HER HAIR SHORT SO WE CAN HAVE IT ALL THE TIME. Also so Husk and Vaggie can bond over both having wings. Sorry I love their potential friendship so much. AND LUCIFER AND VAGGIE TOO!! BOTH BEING FALLEN ANGELS OMG. UGH THE POTENTIAL OF VAGGIE'S RELATIONSHIPS WITH NOT JUST CHARLIE ARE SO GOOD AND I HAVE BEEN ROBBED OF SEEING HER AS AN ACTUALLY MORE FLESHED OUT CHARACTER. I AM SCREAMING AAAAAAAA.

I can't say how much I love them. It's too much. I cant- yay the teaser image before the show came out <3 they are so fucking adorable. UGH SOME1 END ME

Charlie loves the wings hehehe. Vaggie looks nervous about it. It's probably a reminder to her about when she used to be an exterminator. The healing from everything will take a long time but hopefully Charlie will be there for her the entire time. And vice versa

Ayo- 😰

CHARLIE. T H E PRECIOUS BABY.

Uh next one tomorrow cuz yeah 🤯

[nmakii]

‘Can I ask you to do something about Alastor×reader? About y/n being a modern girl (2023-2024), and she often has strange gestures or words towards Alastor. One time she talked to him in modern language, making him confused and very curious. (You can expand the situation as you like, sorry my English is not very good)’

NEW IS ALWAYS BETTER!

— alastor x modern!reader (platonic or romantic!)

— alastor calls reader “good girl” so mostly fem!coded

— I WROTE THIS AND THEN IT GOT DELETED I MIGHT KMS.

alastor gets slangs that are common such as LOL, WTF, IDK but doesn’t get some that aren’t as common like LMFAO, IDRC, or WTAF since they’re just making them longer, so it’s quite useless…

he also doesn’t quite get shortcuts for words. one time you left him a note “lol brb rq imma b back in like 20 min. j gon pick smt up” most of it was honestly gibberish to him, but at the very least, he understood you’ll be back in 20 minutes.

gets really angry when you say things like “stop reaching, gooner. you’re just pissed that you’re a beta.” because; one, you’re blatantly disrespecting the radio demon and telling him to shut up. and two, he doesn’t get what any of that meant. what’s a gooner?

also gets annoyed often when you start singing songs like “i’m the alpha, i’m the leader” or “sticking out your gyatt for the rizzler” because, it’s a reflection on modern society and how music quality in modern times have plummeted significantly.

what happened to those beautiful songs such as “the man i love”? has it been replaced by this rizzler nonsense??? honestly, you’re giving alastor more and more reasons to dislike modernity… you’re lucky he finds your company enjoyable

in a desperate attempt to connect with you, he asked angel about your humor, hoping he’d understand. alastor knows that if anything, velvette would know. but, he’d rather get beaten by lucifer than ask the vees for help…

sadly for him, angel is just as confused. although, he at least knew what this alpha bullshit was, vaguely explaining furries and the alpha-beta-omegaverse to him…

you were in the hotel den, scrolling on social media as alastor walked in. “s/o, be a dear and fetch me some chicken breasts from the butcher, would you? i’d like to prepare something for tonight’s dinner.” alastor smiled

“hmm… nah. go do it yourself, furry” you giggled brattishly. “hahah… what did you call me?” alastor asked sternly, his face now close with yours, antlers increasing only slightly in size. “ah…” you stuttered.

alastor was never this mad when you said stuff like that, what was so different today? maybe he was in a bad mood? “ah… ill get it…” you conceded, using your hands to lightly push alastor away, lest he decides you’ll be for dinner…………

alastor snickered before patting you on the head. “good girl. don’t call me that again, this old dog can still learn new tricks, y’know?” he teasingly sang out. “huh?” you asked. “did you learn what a furry is?” you bit your lip, holding back your laughter.

“indeed, i did. horrifying that you’d think i would indulge in such hobbies…” he sighed, looking a little uncomfortable through his stressed smile. “what..? i don’t think you’re a furry, alastor. it’s not that deep. furry is just something that i used to laugh about with my friends back on earth.” you shallowly laughed, copying his actions by rubbing his hair.

he has to admit, that little mistranslation was a little funny looking back on it. but, he is a little disheartened that he got you scared over nothing. you were just having your fun and he got all pissed off. he’d definitely try to instead ask you about your slang as to prevent such a thing again…

[qu1cks1lversb1tch]

Having them as best friend's:

Multiple X Reader

Contains: Alastor, Angel Dust, Husk, Charlie, Lucifer, Vox, Velvette, Rosie, Adam, Lute, and Valentino

ALASTOR

You're gonna have to hear me out with this one: he's down for the gossip 24/7!!!

He will listen and talk shit with you 100% and I'm not arguing on the matter.

Someone says some wack ass shit to you in public? "I beg your fucking pardon?" With like the scariest grin that fucker can muster.

You start talking to someone? He interrogates them! If they're not strong enough to survive one little interrogation with THE Radio Demon, they're not good enough to date you. Sorry not sorry.

The friendship would be violent, but in almost a sibling type relationship. If he said something absolutely out of line, you'd smack him or kick him in the back of his knees. He'd always get payback, whether it was immediately or a few days/weeks later.

You called him a 'radio faced cunt' once in front of everyone and they all mentally started planning your funeral.

Until he clapped back with something equally as interesting.

He only accepted affection from you and Rosie. And Charlie that one time.

If you had a bad day, he'd know immediately by the look on your face and wouldn't let anyone talk to you until he knew exactly what had made one of his two favorite people upset.

He'd kill them if you told him to. Just supportive bestie shit!

Angel Dust

Let's be real, if you're best friends with Angel, you're probably equally as close with Cherri.

But just you and Angel Dust as best friend's? Shit, he's awesome.

Had a bad day? Go to his room and cuddle Fat Nuggets while you cry/rant about the days woes.

Spontaneous sleepovers BECAUSE YOU CAN!

Platonically flirting to the point that everyone thinks you're together. Neither of you deny the claims, just to keep everyone on their toes.

The words 'love you' followed by something like 'slut' or 'bitch' are common occurrences.

When it comes to dating, Angel just wants you to be happy.

But if someone breaks your heart? He'll come out with guns blazing with no hesitation. NO ONE hurts his bestie.

Platonic cuddles because you love his floof.

Would probably form some sort of marriage pact with you for fun one night when you're both wasted. "Yeah, I'd marry you if we're both still single in 100 years, Toots."

Husk

The banter would be unmatched. You call him a furry and he'll clap back with something that makes your jaw drop before you burst out into laughter.

He'd tell you how it is, regardless of whether you asked or not.

Sure, you're his best friend, and he cares about you. . . But it's because he cares about you that he won't sugarcoat something, even if it's not something you wanna hear.

He would listen to your problems, like any good friend.

He wouldn't trust anyone you had romantic interest in, especially since the ones you always went for had some serious issues.

He'd say something like: "Don't cry to me when that bastard breaks your heart."

And you wouldn't cry to him when it happened, but he'd make you a drink and silently take care of the problem once he had one of the other hotel residents hoist you up to your room.

The next morning you'd tell him he was right and he'd smirk as he wiped down the bar, but wouldn't say anything.

He was never good with affection, so he respects your space and you respect his.

He literally always has your back, even if you don't know it. You do.

Charlie

Honestly, you probably grew up together and that's how the two of you became best friends. (But even if you didn't, everything is still the same.)

She's the friend that's too trusting of everyone, so you easily filled the place of being the friend that questioned everyone's intentions.

You even heavily questioned Vaggie's intentions when Charlie insisted on bringing her around after finding her.

You only warmed up to Vaggie when Charlie admitted her feeling for her, to you one late evening. She was a nervous wreck, but you were always the level-headed friend.

Being best friends with the princess of Hell had some lesser known perks — invitations to high class parties, special access at LuLu World, and the most eventful sleepovers known to Hell.

Whenever you mentioned interest in someone, Charlie was the first to push you to go for it.

If it went wrong, she was always there first, telling you it would be completely fine. If it went good, she was the first to congratulate you.

She's 100% the mom friend. Thirsty? Here's something to drink. Cut your finger? "Here's a bandaid, be more careful."

A relationship similar to siblings, bit without any malice or envy. Just happy to be in each other's presence.

She literally documented everything the two of you did, since the very first time you called her your friend. She's not going anywhere.

Lucifer

Yeah, so, everyone thinks you're dating. Even Charlie is a bit suspicious. You're not, but you had been there by his side for as long as he could remember.

When Lilith left, you filled some part of the void, not allowing Lucifer to go hungry when he spent long days in his office.

On his good days, he's absolutely there for all the tea, especially if it's PIPING HOT. "That bitch said WHAT!?"

He has no filter and will unintentionally intentionally hurt someone's feelings when it comes to you.

He protects you as fiercely as he protects Charlie, despite knowing that you're capable of protecting yourself.

The two of you argue like an old married couple, which only fueled the dating rumors. . . Until you mentioned someone you had interest in.

Bro interrogated everyone you ever liked. Can't handle five minutes with the king of Hell? Not good enough for his bestie. Keep it movin' pal.

No one is allowed to call you a bitch, but him. Anyone else tries, they'll be met with absolute SASS.

Not even joking, Lucifer would be so sassy towards people, to the point that you picked it up.

So the two of you just went around unintentionally terrorizing demons!

Vox

You hate someone? Bet. He'll have someone spy on them and give you the real tea.

Brings you as the plus one for many major events, but bullies you the entire time. You thought you'd get five minutes of peace on your best friends arm? WRONG!

Literally throws toddler meltdown style temper tantrums when it comes to Alastor. You're usually the one who has to reboot him or just smack some sense into him.

You're both pretty level-headed most of the time, but one of you probably has a couple of screws loose. (It's definitely him.)

No one is good enough to date you. Not sorry.

If anyone looks at you wrong, they've signed their second death to double Hell.

You and Vox talk shit about everyone, especially if you've had a hard day.

If it was bad enough, he'd offer to kill the demon who dared make your day shit. He'd still listen to you though.

"Fuck that. You're not going alone." And then you have to wait 15 minutes for him to look 'good enough' to go out, even if you were powerful and just wanted to go on little walk down the street.

Body doubling. Different tasks, silence, but the comfort of having someone else in the room. Absolutely.

Velvette

She likes you slightly more than Vox and Valentino, which is fabulous.

Weekly designated sleepover nights where the both of you unload from the week.

Someone is rude to you? Cue Vel lecturing them on how they fucked up and their career is over, but make it musical.

You went on a date with someone and didn't tell her? "I want details, Lovey! Are they an overlord too? Tell. Me. Everything."

Prepare for Hell's greatest gossip sessions, especially around the topic of Hell's cutthroat fashion industry.

She might not seem like it, but she's a good listener.

You're leaving the tower to run a small errand? Surprise Surprise, she's coming with you and turning it into a whole day, complete with lunch and shopping!

She uses you as a model sometimes, purely because she can.

Will call you a sweet name and insult you in the same breath.

Gets worried if you don't text back within five minutes. She will literally show up to make sure you're alive. You're probably taking a nap.

Rosie

Literally the best to spend the day with. She loves walking with you or just having tea.

Much like Alastor, she would be down for the gossip, but she wouldn't go very far with it.

In terms of relationships, she'd want you to be happy, but would also threaten to eat your partner if they hurt you.

She'd be such a good listener when you came to talk about your day.

She'd even offer advice and just casually drop something like: "Listen to your intuition, darling. It'll tell you others intentions."

At some point or another, everyone questions whether you're dating or not, which both of you laugh at frequently.

She enjoys her privacy, but she also would love having you around more than others.

She would love giving platonic affection, just to make you feel loved.

Sometimes Alastor pops up and Rosie gushes about how the two of you would get along — and immediately you're just thinking how this trio would be iconic.

She doesn't care about your past, you don't care that she's a Cannibal. . . Well, she cares, but she would NEVER hold it against you!

Adam

He literally goes out of his way to piss you off.

There's a lot of threatening and him calling you stuff like 'Sugar Tits'.

Adam annoys you to the point of you WANTING to just jump to Hell, but you never do, because he's your best friend, and you wouldn't want to emotionally traumatize him by making him think that he lost his best friend to Lucifer, AFTER losing his wives to him.

He says "Suck my dick, Bitch" AT LEAST A DOZEN TIMES A DAY. It irritates you to no end.

The banter is unmatched. He wants to get sassy? You're the SASS MASTER.

You pushed him down the stairs for fun and he didn't talk to you for two days.

He doesn't give a fuck who you date, but if they hurt you, he's taking care of them and not telling you SHIT to avoid all of that mushy feelings crap.

The two of you argue too much for anyone to think you're together.

There's NEVER a moment of silence when you're out. He's always singing, talking, laughing, or mimicking the sound of some instrument.

Lute

She's annoyed 24/7 and you're one of the two main causes.

But she wouldn't replace you because who else would put up with her attitude and listen to her rants like you?

If you had a hard day, she'd probably make some offhand comment and then subtly try to make it better by like getting you ice cream with rainbow sprinkles or something.

She hates physical touch, so the only time she touches you is to smack you, probably for saying something very Adam-ish. "Say that shit again and it'll be worse."

She hates everyone you have romantic interest in, but let's you learn your own lessons the hard way.

Nobody could ever picture the two of you as friends, let alone dating.

She's like the sister that has it all but claims she's the black sheep of the family.

Her job comes before everything else in her life, that including you, but when she has time for you, there's usually food and shit talking involved.

She makes sure you drink water every day. She'd kick your ass if you passed out because of dehydration.

She'd give you the key to her place, but you'd never use it unless she told you to. (Like in the event she forgot her set or something)

(I've reached the 10 media limit, so just imagine a gif right here)

Valentino

He offers you a job almost weekly. You hold off on kicking his ass every single time because that's your best friend.

Derives great pleasure from pissing you off.

You don't agree with the manner he treats his employees, so you undermine him every chance you get, just to make sure they get the best treatment possible.

It pisses him off to no end, but he let's it go. He wouldn't hurt you. He couldn't, not without a whole bunch of backlash from quite literally everyone.

Whenever you start liking someone, he warns you to be careful because he knows the industry. He is the industry.

He's gossip central. Talks super exaggerated with his hands and his voice changes whenever he remembers another detail.

He's a touchy feller, that much is evident. He's always touching you in some way, but it's not sexual/romantic or violent, it's more reassurance for both of you. It's a safe middle ground.

You have to leave for some reason? "The limo will take you, but don't touch anything."

He throws tantrums on the regular and you've learned to just let them go on until he eventually shuts the fuck up and let's you speak.

He'll call you a slut and then ask if you want to get food. It's extremely clear that you're not dating lmao.

A/N: I hope this is okay! I've never written for a bunch of these characters, as I just stared writing Hazbin stuff last week, and even then, it was a small Vox one-shot and a Lucifer one-shot.

Requests are open, if anyone would wanna request something for one of these characters? I'd pull through to the best of my ability.

Part Two

[trashogram]

✨ Best Kind of S/O For This Character ✨

Alastor - Observer S/O. His narcissism and theatrics require an indulgent personality, but also someone who knows how to employ the Gray Rock method at just the right time. You’re either an overworked motherly type who will pretend to eat the plastic food your toddler hands to you dutifully or an amusing simpleton that has no time for thinking i.e. the average American audience member.

Lucifer - Challenger S/O. Lucifer is a sweet, idealistic soul… who got damned to an eternity of suffering for it. As inventive and creative as the King of Hell is, he needs someone to keep him from going complacent, otherwise you won’t be hearing or seeing him for years on end as he holes up and tries to find meaning in mediocrity.

Husk - Loyalist S/O. He’s no longer a high-roller, just someone that has to roll over for a higher power — so you best be ready to bond over a common enemy. But that’s counterfeit connection stuff — Husk wants someone direct, straightforward and real. He needs you to be someone he can depend on. A Class Act… or just someone that acts like a fucking adult in this Hellhole.

Sir Pentious - Achiever S/O. Dude’s the ssssssssweetest failure in Hell, but it figures that all he needs to do to get some respect down here is have someone else who succeeds at whatever they do. And thats all due to your goal-oriented and driven personality. There’s no time for awkwardness when you’ve planned your next scheme down to the last detail and Pentious has a pivotal role. So chop chop! Slither your way over here, good sir!

Striker - Individualist S/O. He’s perfected the art of ‘looking perfect’ — he could best the Best of The Best anytime, anywhere and none of you deserve the time of day from him… Hey wait, why aren’t you looking at him? Hey! Stop ignoring him ignoring you! Striker needs the opposite of perfect — he needs a weirdo that doesn’t care about anyone else’s opinions, so never feels the need to prove their own superiority. Striker’s got that complex covered, thanks.

Verosika Mayday - Helper S/O. She needs someone to indulge her too, but not because she’s got Radio Demon-sized ego. Verosika needs someone compassionate and thoughtful, to prove they care without expecting a transaction for it. It’ll be a long time before she stops calling the cops because you didn’t answer her texts for over two hours, but you’ll get there.

Satan - Peacemaker S/O. This kind of goes without saying, but the Sin of Wrath feels little peace throughout his life. You need to bring calm and patience everywhere, maybe in a bag with endless storage like the one that Mary Poppins has? You don’t judge, but you do show disappointment when the grouchy old dragon’s pants catch on fire.

Loona - Enthusiast S/O. Be prepared to bring lots and lots of energy to the team. You’re gonna need it. This furry bait chick is all bark but if you throw her into a new situation, she’ll try to run back to you with her tail between her legs. It’s all about getting her to come out of her shell and ignoring her testy teen angst comments with a smile on your face until she’s run out of quips, and corners to sulk in.

[allmyocsarebritish]

Unspoken words, still recieved

Pairing: Alastor X reader

Warnings(?): fluff, mentions of drugs and alcohol, 5+1

Husk

~

Husker was the first to know about your feelings towards his overlord. It had been a long, stressful day filled with Charlie's 'bonding exercises', and you wanted nothing more than to crash at the bar with a strong drink in hand. So, that was how you ended up swirling a glass of alcohol, taking the occasional sip which scorched your throat and fogged your troubled mind. Naturally, in your tipsy state your tongue was greatly loosened. Husker knew this; he was an experienced bartender, and used to listening to the bitching and whining of those intoxicated. What he didn't anticipate was exactly what slipped out.

"What would you do if you really liked someone, but you knew that they hated that kind of thing? And they'd probably hate you too if they found out?" You asked, lazily drawing circles on the counter top with your finger. Husk sighed deeply in slight irritance, once again ready to assume the role of therapist, offering a listening ear to your irrelevant problems.

"I wouldn't know, kid. I lost the ability to feel years ago." He continued to wipe the countertop, a slight frown prevalent on his extended eyebrows (what kind of description is that lmfao).

"Pfft, edgelord." You scoffed light heartedly, to which Husk offered a small smile of amusement, still not meeting your eyes.

"I guess I'll just keep it all to myself then. I doubt Al would appreciate any sort of elaborate romantic gesture anyway." You downed the last of your drink, hopping off of your stool and fishing into your pocket for change. Husk's eyes narrowed at the mention of the Radio Demon, a shadow of concern crossing his features. He gently grasped your sleeve as you reached out with a few coins, tip included, stopping you from placing them on the counter.

"Al? As in Alastor? Oh, Y/N, you've got to be fucking kidding me."

Your eyes narrowed at this. You expected the miserable old bartender to be disapproving, but hearing him voice his doubts was unpleasant to say the least.

"No, I don't think I am."

Husk rolled his eyes, your sleeve now firmly held between his claws, in a way that would rip the fabric should you try to pull away.

"Listen, kid. I know I'm not here to be your pop or anything but please, for the love of everything, stay safe. He's a dealmaker, and I wouldn't put anything past him." He could feel the invisible neon green leash uncomfortably cold against his furry neck.

"Fuck off, Husker. I can look after myself. Thanks for the drink." You scoffed, pulling away, not caring for the fresh tear in your shirt.

Husk's eyes continued to fix on the direction you exited long after your shadow had disappeared.

"Good luck, kid."

~

Charlie

Charlie was next to know, which, was inevitably going to happen eventually. It was a few weeks following your drunken outburst at the bar, and you could frequently feel Husk's eyes boring into you when you looked away. The pity was infuriating, who the fuck was he to tell you what your Alastor was like?

Charlie, ever the curious devil, noticed the tension radiating from both you and the cat, and decided to involve herself in an attempt to force the two of you back into your companionship.

"Sooo, Y/N," She clasped her hands together, bouncing up behind you as you crossed through the lobby of the hotel, her doe eyes wide and practically pleading. "I noticed you and Husk fell out. But you seemed so close to him!"

"I mean, not really." You shrugged, already trying to walk away from the awkward conversation. "He gave me whiskey, I paid him, we talked a little. I wouldn't call that 'close'."

"But what happened?" The little hellborn princess was persistent, you'd give her that.

"Husker won't understand that he doesn't dictate how I feel about someone." Deep down you knew that was a massive escalation to the situation. It wasn't Husk's fault, he was trying to keep you safe. But you weren't a child, and certainly not his.

"Wait, how you feel about someone? Y/N, do you have a crush?!"

Shit.

"It- it's not a crush." You fucked up. Big time.

"You have a crush!"

"Charlie! Stop!" Your tone was harsh, potentially too much so, causing the demon to back off slightly, although not completely.

"Oh, okay, well I've been known to be an excellent wingman! Woman? Wingwoman? It doesn't matter, if you feel comfortable I'd be absolutely honoured if you trusted-"

You zoned out halfway through her tangent, not having your usual energy to find amusement in her theatrics. You promptly excused yourself, slipping out of the hotel, preparing yourself to take a walk and clear your mind.

"Princess, I know you want to help her, don't push it. The best thing you can do is let her deal with it herself. Trust me, I'd know." Husk warned following your departure, memories of your hostile response to his advice fresh in his mind.

Charlie absolutely did push it.

In fact, you could probably consider her behaviour that followed for the next two weeks low-level stalking. It was her mission to set you up with whoever you fancied. After all, all she wanted was for you to be happy.

Although, after 14 whole days of trying her hardest, she had almost given up on finding out who it was that caught your eye. That was until she saw you with Alastor. It was subtle, not something anyone would notice had they not been searching. But the level of digging she had done on you made it obvious.

The respect you held for the overlord was unmatched by any other. Your usual fairly hot-headed personality had much less of a bite, more aimed towards others than the radio star. Not to mention the way your eyes lit up as soon as he entered the room.

Oh.

Well, this was a spanner in the works she didn't expect. But it was alright, if there was a way for you and Al to be together, Charlie would do her best to help you both reach that conclusion.

~

Vaggie

Naturally, as soon as Charlie knew of your feelings, so did Vaggie. This was to be expected, even though you weren't necessarily aware that the princess was onto you, it wasn't rocket science that word would pass eventually.

"I just need to find a way to set them up! Oh Vaggie, how cute would they be?!"

Charlie paced through their shared bedroom, ranting to her girlfriend as the fallen angel sat on the bed.

"Cute? Alastor?" Vaggie snorted, refusing to accept that as a way to describe him.

"But Vaggie!! Imagine them together! Oh, she could absolutely soften him up! Imagine Alastor all sweet and in love! Maybe it'll push him into redemption and they can be all smiling and happy in heaven!!"

"Babe," Vaggie interrupted the ceaseless yapping (I'm so sorry but there's no other way to accurately phrase it lmao. Charlie's a yapper) "Seriously don't push it. You know Alastor isn't the type to go all gooey eyed over some girl, even if it is someone he's close to. So don't expect anything, just leave her to get over it herself."

Charlie drew out a long, exaggerated sigh, showing her disappointment.

"I know you want to make them happy, sweetie, but some things just aren't meant to be." Vaggie held her girlfriend's hands in one of her own, the other resting on the Princess's cheek.

Ultimately, Vaggie held a high level of concern for you in this scenario. She hoped and prayed for your safety, though she knew better than to meddle in your business. Despite this, she did make a mental note to keep an eye on you, the angel would never forgive herself if you made a deal she could have prevented. Of course, none of this she could voice to Charlie; her girlfriend adored Alastor and looked up to him, so she opted to keep this to herself, as she hoped you would do also.

~

Angel

Angel was someone in the hotel whom you truly did consider a friend. And, friends trust friends, or at least according to your wasted brain they did. So, you came clean to the spider, and, in the process, subjected yourself to an eternity of even more torment. For fuck's sake, you were already in hell.

"Angel?" You asked cautiously, tone sending a shiver of worry into the demon. Your voice held an aura of seriousness, something that made him rather uncomfortable.

"Ya'lright, toots?" He asked, his own words reflecting the slight anxiousness you had bestowed.

"Yeah, just got a 2am confession to make." You responded, eyes focusing on the ceiling, your body draped over Angel's bed. The two of you were sprawled over it with your heads together in the middle, although the spider was substantially closer to toppling off than yourself. He chuckled at your revelation, feeling the slight worry vanish.

"Well, then go ahead."

You took a deep breath, drug induced confidence already beginning to ebb. Another long drag of your joint however, and sobering up was no longer a cause for concern. Yet.

"You know Alastor?"

"Yeah?" Angel asked, already suspicious of how this was going.

"I'm just saying-"

"HeAr mE oUt" Angel mocked, to which you swatted his arm, leading to the star erupting into a fit of laughter at you retaliation.

"You're inta Smiles?!" Angel laughed "Well, Sugar tits, now I've seen everythin!"

"Shut the fuck up, Anthony." You grumbled, despite suppressing a smirk at Angel's antics. There was no getting yourself out of this one now.

~

Niffty

Niffty was not one you were expecting to have to explain yourself to. But, being the nosy little bug she was, you realised only too late that she was peering at your phone screen as you texted Angel Dust.

"You like Alastor?"

"What? No! I-" Niff's singular, unblinking eye bore directly into you soul, unsettling you and making your mouth run dry with unease. You sighed, holding up your hands in submission.

"Maybe."

"I think you should go tell him! You know he really likes you too? I honestly can't blame you, he is a bad boy" the little bug let out an unhinged, slightly manical laugh. You cringed at the way she referred to your Alastor, almost entirely missing the part where she said he liked you back.

Wait.

He liked you back?

You tried your bloody hardest not to raise your hopes after that one, this was Niffty we were talking about. But regardless, there was a possibility!

"Wait, he likes me too?" You asked, trying not to show the way adrenaline and excitement pumped through your body at this potential revelation.

"Oh, yeah. I heard him talking to Rosie about it a couple weeks 'go. Said it was a 'disgusting weakness he couldn't show to anyone'"

Oh.

Well.

That wasn't exactly helpful.

But at least he liked you back?

"So what did she say?!" You asked, suspense rising.

"Who?" Niffty asked, eyes wide and staring at you in utter bewilderment.

"Rosie!" You responded incredulously.

"About what?"

"Alastor!"

"Oh! She said that he should get over it and just tell you, that he'd feel better and even if you didn't feel the same way you'd understand 'cause you're human too. And if not he could just eat you."

"What?!!"

"Although I might have made that last part up." She tapped a spindly finger against her chin in concentration, trying her hardest to recall the conversation.

Your brows raised in concern before shaking your head and resigning not to question her.

"Okay, well, thanks, Niff. I gotta go now but I appreciate you telling me!" Your exit was rushed, but you really didn't want Niffty to catch you delighting in your newfound optimism. (Kicking your heels and squealing).

~

Alastor

Two days. You had spent two days preparing what you would say to Al and how, yet no matter how hard you tried, you couldn't for the (after) life of you think of what to do or say.

The worst part was the fact your favourite bartender was no longer there for you to turn to when life got tricky. So, you resolved to drowning your sorrows in your own alcohol, and, in the process, inexplicably and subconsciously avoiding your Alastor.

The Radio Demon did not like this.

Every time he descended to the lobby you were missing. Every time he walked to Cannibal town you weren't accompanying him. Every time he broadcasted you weren't waiting for him outside the tower.

This was becoming a problem; Alastor held you so highly in his estimations that he found your presence more than tolerable. So the fact that you just up and disappeared left him feeling an odd sensation.

Emptiness? It was strange, unpleasant and Alastor didn't like it. He was no fool: he knew of his feelings for you, and, after months of denial, finally reached some sort of acceptance of the merciless scenario he found himself in. Such a powerful overlord resigned to a schoolboy crush. Pathetic, really.

But, this loneliness wouldn't do. No, it wouldn't do at all. So, Alastor was going to do something about it. Force proximity with you? Of course not, that was far too desparate, even for these circumstances.

His eyes trailed across the lobby before landing on the bar, and subsequently, the bartender. Bingo!

"Husker! My dear fellow~"

"Go fuck yourself." The cat raised a middle finger to Alastor, bottle held to his lips and tilted.

"Now is that any way to talk to your old pal?" Al taunted. Oh this was fun; how he adored pissing off Husk. In fact, he almost even forgot the motivation for his inquiry.

You.

"Say, Husker. Is there a chance that you've seen Y/N around here recently? She seems to be avoiding me for some strange reason."

Husk scoffed and rolled his eyes. "I wonder why."

Alastor's eyes narrowed as his smile tensed. "Careful, my friend." He warned.

"Listen, boss," Venom spiked the cat's tone, insincerity lacing the word. "I haven't seen her in a week or so. We had a... disagreement and she's avoiding me. Go find her yourself if you're so fucking concerned."

Well, that was conclusive. "Indeed I will. So long, Husker!" Al hopped off the barstool and made for your room, hoping you would be there, as to not look a fool.

Yes, that was it.

Raising a fist to the door, the Radio Demon knocked.

Once. Twice. Thrice.

At the third and final knock, you opened the door, recognising the clear, precise knock.

"Hello, my dear!" His transatlantic voice rang out, laced with static as ever.

"Hi, Al." You responded, quiet and solemnly.

"Why so glum? Smile, my dear! You know you're never fully dressed without one!" His clawed fingers came to rest at the corners of your mouth, delicately and fondly pushing upwards. His own permanent grin softened as he looked at you, and you couldn't help but lean into his touch.

"Have you been intentionally avoiding me, Cher?" He blurted out, surprising even himself.

"What?! Ha, Al, don't make me laugh! I'd never avoid you, how ridiculous!"

He narrowed his eyes at you. "Cher."

"Al."

"Be honest with me."

There it was. That thing he had about him, making it impossible to lie.

"I wasn't intentionally avoiding you." You drew out. " And I'm sorry, I didn't mean to."

"But, why?"

"Because I love you."

After freezing like a deer in headlights, (HA) his face morphed into an expression entirely unreadable, even to you.

Shit.

Fuck.

Bollocks.

You fucked up. That was it. Friendship over. Potentially even afterlife over.

"Al? I'm sorry I-" you were interrupted but the feeling of his arms wrapping around you. It was slow and gentle, as though you were made of fragile porcelain, easily breakable beneath his warm embrace.

"It's okay, Cher"

I love you too unspoken words, yet still received.

Bonus:

You hopped onto the barstool as Husk refused to meet your eyes. A long, awkward silence drew out, and you kicked your legs, fingers drumming on your knee. Realising there was no way the bartender was speaking first, you resolved to dive straight into your apology.

"Husk? I'm sorry. I was a bitch and shouldn't have taken it out on you because you were only trying to keep me safe-"

Your apology was cut short as a shot of whiskey slid across the counter towards you. You smirked and brightened when you looked up to meet Husk grinning at you.

"Well if that wasn't the most insincere fucking bullshit I've ever heard."

You rolled your eyes, downing the alcohol in one, causing your throat to sting and eyes to water.

"Just stay safe, kid. That's all I ask."

"Deal." You joked, sticking out your hand.

"Deal." Husk responded sarcastically, though the both of you knew it was lightheaded. You were just grateful to have your favourite bartender back.

[adyophene]

lucifer x husk is something i never knew i needed and as a multishipper im screaming

literally. king of hell x some alcoholic furry guy

i love them i need to know how they wouldve met, fallen for each other and started dating. and how much thatd piss alastor off

Ooh I am so happy other people are enjoying this pair as much as I am! I've gotten a few asks about my headcanons for them, and I am happy to blab on and on. Fair warning. This is gunna be a long and rambling essay.

I'm gunna put it all under a readmore, just cause I want to insert the art I've done of them so far, since I've been half-heartedly trying to tell a visual story through the doodles.

Okay. On we go!

How they met;

We did see them technically meet in the show, where they shared their singular canon piece of dialogue, which was just Husk saying 'hey'. And then in the finale where we see a literal split second moment of Lucifer holding Husk's arm.

(also seeing the sweet looks huskerdust is giving each other here just makes me feel so delulu for writing this all, but crackships are silly by definition, so lets get back to the lucihusk) For me, what I imagined, is after the Hotel is finished its rebuilding, that is when Husk and Lucifer finally actually meet in a proper manner. I think Lucifer would be trying to make a good impression on all Charlie's friends at this point, endeared to all of them from their actions during the finale. Unfortunately, I think he is also the King of Bad First Impressions.

[Note. I think at this point Lucifer wouldn't even remember Husk's name quite yet. I think he would call him 'Keekee' ( by accident) or 'Dusk' (confidently incorrect) or just be like "Hey!.... Uh... You?" until Charlie or Vaggie finally corrected him. ]

Husk, on the other hand, I feel like maybe wouldn't gel with Lucifer right away. Wouldn't hate him, but also maybe not be enamored with him right away. Same as Lucifer, maybe he would have sweetened on him a bit through the hotel's rebuilding, but I think they'd start out at very neutral feelings. Maybe a vague sense of 'He's okay, but I don't know if we will really get along.'

Despite this, Lucifer is persistent, and he's going to be everyone's (except maybe Al, unless they start getting along by s2) buddy. He'd start hanging around the bar and participate in the redemption exercises.

Now, we know Lucifer struggles with depression, and I think he would be trying real hard to mask anything going on during this time. They defeated Adam! They rebuilt the Hotel! He believes in Charlie's dream, and he's more involved with her life and other people than he has been for years.

His only issue being Husk sees right through it, both because Husk is perceptive, but also because even the King of Hell can't help but have a lonely night or two at the bar where he ends up venting about his divorce and subsequent lingering loneliness.

[snapcube ref aside, )I really do think Husk would start to feel more positively toward Lucifer after Luci would drop the act somewhat. That they could bond over feeling both at their lowest of lows, while also being to admit that things seem to be getting better!

This would be about the point that I imagine Lucifer developing more romantic feelings! Husk would be a bit less prickly, and Luci would just absolutely eat up any and all positive interactions they'd have. I like to picture a lot of little shows of care at the this point, like Husk memorizing what Lucifer likes and even making up 'fun' drinks just to try and cheer the guy up. And Lucifer would fun a fun game in trying to get the grumpy cat to smile, and just, lighting up himself any time he was successful.

And that culminating into the two of them making each other laugh, with Alastor being an easy butt of the jokes, and a good way for Husk, himself, to finally get a chance to vent. I think Lucifer would be one of the only 'safe' options for Husk to do that with, in just so far as Al can't really threaten Lucifer, and Lucifer already sees Al as a bit of a manipulative bastard.

Falling for each other; At this point, Lucifer would start being a bit more caring toward Husk, though with that wonderful, oblivious flair of his. I don't think Lucifer himself would realize he'd have a crush up until he'd start feeling protective or jealous over Husk, and it would really throw him for a loop at first.

Because fake dating is one of my all-time favorite tropes, I have always had a idea for a fanfic (or comic) that I haven't gotten around to yet, based around Lilith coming back, and Lucifer panickily asking Husk to pretend to be his boyfriend, so he can appear well adjusted/completely over her. Of course the whole thing would backfire, as Lilith would see through it (as Lucifer wouldn't be as good of an actor as he'd think), and that Husk would end up kind of feeling hurt by the whole thing.

Husk, who'd go along with the plot with an eyeroll, would find himself seizing up through the whole fake date/encounter. Would find weird, sudden emotions bubbling up and absolutely hating it.

I don't think that man would think about the class difference between him and Lucifer up until someone would say something about it, maybe Lucifer himself trying to rationalize the (at this time still fake) relationship to Lilith. Now, Husk feels uneasy about the whole thing and ends up drinking heavily the whole night so he doesn't have to think about feelings. (Blitz and Stolas who? Ahaha. fuck.) Meanwhile, while the date would be fake, I think Lucifer would really rather like having Husk on his arm and feeling like he'd have a love-life again, while also not really getting why Husk's mood would be getting worse throughout the night. I think they'd still end up on good terms, but both of them would have their feelings in a jumble, and Husk would not like it. (he thinks he's lost the ability to love, after all)

I think somewhere at this point, as they are starting to develop feelings for one another, is when Lucifer finally starts really realizing how tied to Alastor Husk is, and he starts to make it everyone's problem. I do think Al and Lucifer would stay snarky at each other this whole time, but that it'd only get worse, as Al would poke back since he'd find Lu's over reactions funny.

I also think Al would be maybe the last person to realize anything romantic would be brewing between Lucifer and Husk, and he'd just think it'd be a purely platonic thing.

Beyond just bitching about Alastor, Lucifer would really be ramping up his attention towards Husk too. Fully in that 'puppylove/crush' stage, and trying his darndest to make Husk feel good and special. Husk would be resistant to it all, thinking it would just be Lucifer rebounding hard, and not wanting to get wrapped up in Morningstar family drama when he could happily (miserably) keep his head down and just keep drinking the days away.

But then Lucifer would find out about Husk's love of stage magic, and his history as a performer, and it'd be all over for the catman. It would become Luci's new pet project to rope Husk into some joyful self-expression, and after a song and dance number's worth of convincing, Husk would start to come around. I have to post all these images now cause- I drew them with the intention of mimicking a musical number! Husk starting off as a bit resistant before jumping in whole heartedly, and Lucifer overexcitedly dragging him along throughout the music number, hyping him up and just all around being smitten.

And this is where Husk would start really falling. Getting swept up in indulging his favorite, least destructive hobby, and having someone who absolutely loves it to bond with. Especially when it would be over. When they would just settle down and talk, and laugh, and bond over what they love about performing. The spectacle, the audience, the love of the craft. Its about the comradery!!!

@belladonazeppole wrote a wonderful series of fanfics based off these pictures, as well as the songs from 'The Greatest Showman' that really fit the ship! I would be remiss to not mention them here, because Bella and their fics are just wonderful!

How they started dating;

Now. Don't think just cause they both caught feelings for each other, that they'd immediately admit to it. No. I think both of them would drag their heels. I don't think Husk would admit to them at all, without some outside force effecting it. I think he'd stubbornly try to ignore the crush or drink it away, rather than let his heart become vulnerable to anymore damage.

Meanwhile, Lucifer would be struggling between his feelings for Husk and Lilith. (In the actual canon, I do think they might try to rekindle things, depending on what kind of person Lilith turns out to be, but I digress.) Part of him would be so swept up in a giddy kind of excitement, while the other would be set firmly in the camp of 'this is a bad idea, this won't work out, just look at what happened to your last relationship'. It wouldn't stop him from being outwardly more and more affectionate, but it would be weighing on him.

I do think Lucifer would end up being the one who would be thinking; "What am I doing. He'd never like me back." While Husk would be just sitting there (echoing what was said in the ask- sorry I went all wild and wrote this much about the ship dear god)- "I'm just some fucking furry alcoholic, what the fuck would the king of hell see in me??? Am I delusional? What the fuck is going on??" And I feel like this stage would go on for MONTHS and drive everyone else nuts. It would be clear to everyone (except Alastor, who again, would be just this meme

Though that wouldn't stop him from getting a little pissy about it) And then it would all come to a head during something benign, like a board game night. There would be flirting, there would be jealousy, there would be arguing, and then finally, loudly and with a lot of feeling, Lucifer would shout his way through asking Husk out on a date. A real Date. A capital 'D' date out on the town, dressed to the nines and a real good time. The board would be knocked over in the fray, game pieces raining down upon them while Husk would just stare blank faced, trying to process what just happened. An awkward half-minute would pass before he'd finally, trying to play it cool, shrug out a 'sure'.

How much it'd piss Alastor off;

In the aftermath, a radio static would just lowly grate everyone's ears as Alastor would be slowly coming to terms on how just annoying it would be to have his friend (/Unhealthy co-dependent pet friend possession??) romantically involved (ew) with the King of Hell (double ew)??? Then, either it would be something light hearted like 'he keeps trying to break them up but failing cause he hates interacting with romance' or a darker route where 'he keeps trying to manipulate them into breaking up by preying on all their worst insecurities in the relationship'.

And that, my friend, is all I have in mind so far for this delusional crackship au! There is more I could flesh out, of course, like Angel's role as a friend or potential third in the relationship, or what I imagine as Husk becoming like a stepdad to Charlie, but I've typed enough for the whole month. Hope any of that was coherent! I did not bother to edit or proof read it. Just pure stream of consciousness.

[talesfromawannabewriter]

Furry Companion

welp here it is, ladies and gentlemen, may I introduce of the storyline of arc 1 written by @talesfromawannabejournalistand and @kittenfangirl20

also special thanks to @rius-cave for giving me some inspiration for the plot, and thanks to @helluvahazbins for giving me inspiration for the Hellhound character and her appearance from their own art.

@kittenfangirl20 see at end of notes

Lucifer knew there would be a day like this would eventually come. Since the moment Adam woke up in Hell as a sinner and fallen angel Lucifer had vowed have him protected and happy at all times. It was the least he could do after all he did to him. In the beginning it was easy to keep him entertained as he mainly stayed in his room. He stayed in the hotel all the time so he wasn’t worried too worried about it.

But now, especially since they officially got together, Lucifer’s been busy more with his work as King, he can’t be by Adam’s side all the time and Adam was wanting to go out more. Plus Adam needed someone, a companion. Sure he had Angel Dust but that was about it. It didn’t help that the other residents, beside Angel and Charlie, were outright hostile towards him. Lucifer swore that if it wasn’t Hell itself Adam needed to watch out for Vaggie and Alastor and maybe even Nifty but for a whole other reason.

In any event Adam needed a companion, his own hellhound, which is why they were both at a an adoption clinic with the head director walking past kennel after kennel of teens with her going on about the different potentials of each hound. Adam was growing bored and to be honest a bit annoyed at being dragged here by Lucifer. He thought this whole adoption process with Hell hounds was weird, they were treated almost like pets. Yes, they had an animal appearance but they were sentient just like the rest of the demons in Hell. As he was thinking about it in the corner of his eye a movement caught his eye.

There in the back was a young hellhound, who appeared to be female, she appeared to be 12-14 years old. She had the appearance of husky and wolf dog mixed together with dark fur and and long black hair that covered a part of her face. However, when she looked up he saw both her eyes as they flashed red and she growled at him.

Director: sir please stay away from that kennel specifically we’ve had incidents in the past where some male adopters got too close and lost a hand to her. Let’s just say she’s just too unstable to be a good guard for you

Lucifer: come on my dear I’m sure there are plenty others for you to choose from

Adam: yeah you go ahead Luci I think I’m just uh gonna go to the bathroom

Lucifer raised an eyebrow but ultimately shrugged following the lady in charge as she showed Lucifer the other hounds. Adam waited till they were out of ear shot then turned his attention back to the girl who was just glaring at him waiting for him to do something

Adam: um hi

She didn’t respond

Adam: my names Adam, what’s yours?

???: Lydia

Adam gave her a smile

Adam: it’s a pretty name

Instead of a smile she instead bared her teeth and scooted even further deep into her kennel

Lydia: the fuck did you just say!?

Adam: I said it’s a pretty name

Lydia: Get the fuck away from me before I tore open your guts for all of Hell to see!

When Adam didn’t move away from the bars she let out an intimidating bark

Lydia: what the fuck do you want!?

Adam: Nothing I just wanted your name

Lydia: well you know my name now you can go back to your royal boy toy and pick out a good hellhound, just just please go away and leave me alone

Adam stared at Lydia, even though she was telling him to go, deep down inside he knew that’s not what she wanted. Looking at her was like looking at himself when he was in a similar position not just when he revived here in Hell but when he was left abandoned over and over again in his life. Scared, confused, and lashing out at everyone because it was the only way to express how she was feeling. At that moment he knew that he couldn’t let her stay here. Exhaling he stepped away from the bars and crouched a little to make himself appear less intimidating to her. Adam: Lydia, you can say no to this, but…I can take you away from here, would you like that?

Lydia stood up from her cot and took slow small steps over to him. Adam could see her full height being at 5’7. As she got closer he could see her guard was still up until she was standing right in front of him. Lydia stared down deep into Adam’s eyes and even though she didn’t know why, she didn’t feel in danger by this sinner. In fact she felt her walls tore down as she saw nothing but earnestness in them as he seemed like genuinely wanted to help her. Tears started to form in her eyes as she looked down and gave her answer

Lydia: …..yes

alright Kitten, hoped you liked it now it’s your turn

[bad-and-drawn-that-way]

First of all, very in love with the digital reader fic you put out <3

But since reader expressed not knowing why they were in hell I just couldn't help myself from thinking about this-

Reader: I don't even know why I'm here, the hell did I ever do?

Lucifer: Didn't you crash over half of all the systems on earth when you were alive?

Reader: That was an accident! I was only trying to crash like...ten!

Just a goofy thought that popped into my head- destructive characters that are chaotic on accident my beloved lmao-

Kisses darling <3

-📽

Sweet silly little Lucifer with his ducks. I feel like everyone thinks he's completely aware of everything happening in Hell at all times. Meanwhile, he's just making ducks and missing his daughter and can't remember the last time he ate.

Digital Pet [Vox x Reader, but this is a Lucifer interaction]

What Do You Mean You Don't Know

You'd been surfing through the digital plane like any other day. Vox had his schedule completely full, so you were on your own the pass the time. You hopped between windows that led into various devices all around Hell.

It was hard to tell where you were most of the time, but a part of you was convinced that you could slip into the devices of demons outside the Pride Ring. You'd once seen hellhounds and succubi at a party when you'd peeked into a large screen behind a DJ on stage. The large venue was covered in honeycombs and you saw some sort of lava lamp-looking furry doing shots in the middle of the energized crowd. While the aesthetic was similar enough to what you'd seen in the sinner's little slice of Hell, it felt... different.

It was precious information you decided to hold close to your chest. Maybe you'd tell Vox one day but from everything you'd seen about his power-hungry reputation, you decided it may be best not to play your card too soon. For all you know, it was just an exclusive club with different vibes. It wasn't unheard of for demons from the other rings to come to the clubs in Pride.

You were floating through an endless hall of screens and lights, looking between the different windows into the world you couldn't hope to touch when you saw a face that made you double-take.

"Is that..." You float back and gasp as you get a closer look that confirms your suspicions. "Oh, you motherfucker!"

Lucifer let out a startled yelp, dropping the duck he'd been painting as he fell out of his chair. He'd just been minding his own business, listening to some light jazz while he made duckie replicas of his daughter and all her little friends at the hotel when a loud voice suddenly blasted over the music on his laptop.

He frowned as he looked down and saw his white pants splatted with the fresh red paint of Alastor's duck. He was on his ninth attempt at replicating the cocky jerk and had finally been on the verge of getting his stupid grin right when you startled him.

"Oh great," Lucifer grumbled as he pulled himself off of the ground. "It's already bad enough I have a growing pile of ducks dedicated to this prick, now he's ruining my clothes too."

Lucifer leaned over his desk, trying to see what sort of pop-up advertisement or virus had gotten on his system when he suddenly saw you watching him with crossed arms. Your small form glared at him from where you sat atop of his video player.

"A sinner...?" Lucifer blinked slowly before looking at you in awe. He could see your soul and recognized you as a person immediately. "What on Earth are you doing in there?"

"You tell me!" you point at him angrily. "You're the guy in charge of this shit, aren't you? What did I ever do to you?! I didn't do anything to deserve a worse Hell than everyone else."

"How should I know?" Lucifer squawked as he threw up his arms in defense... "I haven't gone outside in... wait, what day is it?"

"How do you not know?" You ask, the two of you amping each other up in your confusion. "You're Lucifer! This is literally your entire thing!"

"Uh, excuse you," Lucifer tsked as he placed a hand on his chest. "I'll have you know I am a man of ducks and dadness. Not keeping track of every soul that drops into Hell. Do you have any idea just how many of you die a day? A lot. Too many. Just. Please get better at staying alive, I beg you."

You deadpan at him before shaking your head with a sigh. "Well, do you at least know how to get me out of the digital plane? I'd like to actually eat food or let my feet touch the ground o-or sleep in a bed!"

"Uhh," Lucifer laughed nervously. "Yeaaaah, no. Nope. Sorry uh, no. Technology isn't something I really know anything about. I'd love to help but uh, yeah... no."

You groan, obviously disappointed in his answer as you flop over to the side and let your frustration win in the moment. You run a hand down your face and look up at the great devil of Hell with a sigh.

"Do you at least have any idea why I'm in Hell and not Heaven?"

Lucifer hummed, squinting at you as he ran a history check on your soul. It took a lot longer to find a reason than he expected, but then he finally landed on it.

"Ah, there it is," he muttered. "Looks like you ate the last slice of birthday cake in the fridge back in your college days."

Your jaw drops, for a couple of reasons. The top reason should have been that such a little thing damned your soul for eternity. However, your priorities were a bit skewed. Which became transparently obvious as you exclaimed, "Excuse me?! It was MY birthday cake!"

"Yeah, but they called dibs," Lucifer shook his head with a sigh. "Heaven takes dibs very seriously. And as you should know by now, I don't make the rules."

The powerful demon grumbled like a child as you recovered from the absolute bullshit that was your afterlife. It wasn't until you'd sat back up that you looked past Lucifer and finally noticed his room.

"Why the fuck are there so many ducks?"

[sparrowrye]

Alastor x Fem! Reader {soulmates} Part 3

Synopsis: soulmate AU where you have the same mark on your body as your soulmate, and if your soulmate dies, you die too. Alastor needs to make sure that his soulmate is safe so he can continue his reign - whatever that takes.

Part 3: Lesser of two evils

Part Pilot | Part 2

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The very next day, I attempted another escape.

Surely he wouldn't assume that I would try it again after yesterday. He might think that I was too 'scared' to escape so soon. So I dared it again.

I started from the very beginning. When I woke, I quickly dressed, fortunately in pants this time, and opened the ancient window. I cracked it just enough to slip through. I let the wind carry me from the window to the edge of the cliff, out of view of the kitchen window. I moved with the wind as far as I could until I could see a beach forming at the base of the cliff. I glided down and started at a brisk jog.

If I stayed along the beach, I was sure to come across something right? Unless it was an island of some sort. What would I do then? I decided to cross that bridge when I got there.

The cliff side eventually evened out and blended into the beach. I slowed to a walk, constantly looking over my shoulder. My neck was starting to hurt from constantly checking. I was waiting to see Husker's bright wings but they never appeared.

After walking for what felt like hours, I had succeeded. I saw a pier in the distance and immediately started running. I had found civilization. I had found my escape. I felt a huge sense of relief knowing it wasn't an island.

The closer I came to the pier the more I could see people walking back and forth. My legs burned from running on the soft sand but I didn't dare stop. I was so happy to have found people and to have gotten this far.

A force from behind drove me into the ground. A furry arm wrapped around my neck and pulled me up. I pulled my legs up and abruptly dropped them, nearly throwing Husker's weight forward. He flapped his wings and pulled me off the beach into the woods. I reached up and poked him in the eyes, momentarily stunning him. I ran for the beach but the wind shoved me back. He enveloped me in his wings, cutting my vision from the town.

I pulled out his feathers and he howled in pain. He tightened his grip and moved his wings out of reach. I shoved my chin between my neck and his arm, slipping myself out of his grip. His claws grabbed at my shirt and raked down my skin. He pulled me back and wrapped his legs around my waist. I started pulling at his fur. He hissed loudly in my ear and shoved a cloth into my face.

I inhaled dust of some kind and began coughing. He let go of me as I scrambled away, sending him back with more wind. I jumped to my feet and ran for the beach again. I tripped out onto the sand but didn't dare stop.

I looked over my shoulder. Husker was nowhere in sight. My simple wind was barely anything so why wasn't he chasing after me? I kept running as I looked around, waiting for him or Alastor to appear somewhere else.

The next time I looked over my shoulder I fell into the sand. My surroundings began tilting and I felt like I was clinging to the side of a cliff face. I tried using magic but it did nothing.

I was on an anti-magic drug.

Someone picked me up and my strength all but vanished. I didn't recognize the person until we had disappeared into the forest again, the shadows revealing Husker's angry scowl.

I had failed again.

The drug had an effect for a full twenty-four hours. I was forced to stay in bed the whole time for fear of losing my balance and hitting my head. I was nauseous but never got sick. It was a horrible state to be stuck in.

I waited until the following night to escape again. The drug had worn off and everyone was supposedly asleep. I slipped through my window once again and walked along the beach. Husker found me much sooner than last time.

I tried several more times to escape and with each one I attempted, the sooner they discovered. I was growing tired of the countless failings. Husker always managed to get the stupid drug into my system. I had a feeling it was because Alastor would be angry if my injuries showed up on his skin. He always managed to cast some kind of remark about how a Slight hand was no match for a Full mage. It was the only interaction I had with the Radio Demon.

Eventually I stopped trying run. Then Plan B sprung into action.

Alastor wanted nothing to do with me and wanted to be left alone. How would he feel if I became a nuisance? Surely dealing with someone so bothersome would entice him to let me back into the world. As dangerous of a game as this was to play, I had to remain confident in the fact that he simply couldn't kill me. Granted, I know better than anyone there were much worse things than death, but I had to at least try. Threatening suicide always seemed to work with my past ring masters, and they weren't even soul-bound to me.

It started simple (definitely not because I was afraid). I always made sure to include curses in my sentences whenever he was passing. Husker caught onto it but he never corrected me, instead rolling his eyes and letting out a heavy sigh. Several times Alastor snapped at me like he had done before. He liked his scare tactics such as the dampening of the lights, extension of his antlers, and the yellowing of his large, sharp teeth.

Next were his quarters. I managed to find paperclips and other little objects to use as a picks for the locks. Picking locks had been a skill I learned to master early on as a kid. It made my old masters incredibly angry when the guards yelled at them to get a better leash on me. It meant they had to buy an expensive cage that I couldn't pick my way out of. I never went into Alastor's room, though I did peak into the red rooms. His bedroom looked like a normal master bedroom and the office had various radios sitting around. I left them unlocked and cracked open every time he returned for the day.

Much like with the cursing, it was more of a sharp word and distortion of his body. He never really laid a hand on me since our fight in the woods, which surprised me. I had expected the Radio Demon to be more aggressive with those 'under' him. Even Husker seemed to be bracing for something more than a stern talking-to.

After a few weeks, I started noticing Alastor spending more time in his office. I could hear his old radios playing and his door stayed locked tight. I decided to make one more big, final stand against this tacky mage. I attempted another 'escape' and managed to steal some of the powder from Husker's pockets. I hid it under my pillow and waited until the following day. I found Husker sitting on the porch again, drinking another bottle of whiskey.

I had the napkin of powder behind my back as I approached him, asking to pick more clothes from the store. As he pulled out his phone, I rubbed the powder across his nose. He shoved me away but the drug had gotten into his system already. He coughed and furiously pawed at his face.

"How's that feel, huh?" I yelled.

"What is wrong with you?" he coughed.

"Using that drug so often on someone can do serious damage to their physical and magic well-being."

"Maybe if you didn't run I wouldn't have to use it." He rubbed at his eyes that were now red.

"Maybe if you didn't keep me here I wouldn't have to run." I slammed the front door behind me. I quickly ran to my room and locked the door behind me. I opened the window and glided down to the beach. I casually started in the direction of the town, waiting for Alastor to appear. If Husker's magic was dampened and Alastor was in the house, surely the cat mage would request help from his master.

My guesses were confirmed when Alastor appeared in front of me from the shadows. I stopped where I was and crossed my arms. I pretended to glance down at a fake watch on my wrist. "Took you long enough."

Alastor let out a sigh. "What do you want? You've been trying to get my attention for quite some time now."

"I want you to let me go."

He rolled his eyes. "You know that's impossible for you, dear."

"Hey I'm just saying," I lifted my arms and walked past him, "if you leave me in the town right down the beach here, you won't have to deal with me anymore. A powerful mage like you can teleport so what's the problem?"

"The problem is that you and I share a soul," he watched me walk past, "What happens to one happens to the other."

I turned around to walk backwards. "I don't like you anymore than you like me. So let me live with normal people near that old house of yours, check on me whenever you want, and we'll call it even. You can let poor Husker go back to whatever he wants. How's his nose doing by the way?" I pointed to my own nose with a sly smile.

"I must say," he started to follow me, "you have proven to be far more of a nuisance than I thought possible from someone who lived her life in a cage." That made me stop in my tracks. "You're so used to being in a cold, dark cage that I thought an elegant one would serve you much better."

"Well I am human. I escaped using my own two hands and made a living for myself for five years. I've had a taste for freedom and now I'm hungry for it like never before." I wish I had claws to slice into his throat. "And I won't stop trying."

"I have been incredibly understanding and patient." He started walking around me in circles. I never let my back turn to him. "If you wish to be back in a cold, damp, dark cage I can arrange for that. I need not make you comfortable, but alive." The environment around me turned into static and symbols. I found myself standing in an old, dark cellar with a single lightbulb overhead. "Would you prefer something like this instead?"

I looked at him. His body had turned completely black save for his bright red eyes and yellow teeth. Everything in me bristled as fear choked me. I sent a blast of fire at him but he dispersed with his shadow. I heard his cackle echo in the room and fade into the distance. I looked around to find old, broken furniture stacked piles high around me. Was I back in the house? In an old cellar that I didn't know existed? There was no sign of a staircase. No sign of an exit.

Panic grabbed at my chest as I tried to stay calm. Surely there was a way out. He was using his magic to make it look like there wasn't. I ran to the closest wall and started running my hands all along it. There was a way out. Even if it was locked, there still had to be an exit. It was all an illusion. I wasn't actually in a cellar. He was trying to scare me.

I ran every inch of the cellar, climbing over old furniture and scraping myself on splintered wood. I became frantic and started running head first into the walls. They were solid concrete. There was an exit. There had to be. I just wasn't finding it.

Logic started to slip as fear settled in. I was running around like a scared animal. I began throwing things at the wall and sending blasts of hot fire or slicing through with wind. I tried parting it like I could do with the earth but nothing was working. Tears streamed down my face and my breathing was all over the place.

"You can't keep me here!" I screamed. I kept running into the walls until my arms, shoulders, and head were sorely bruised. I looked down at my hands. I grabbed the nearest sharp object which happened to be a splintered piece of wood. I laid my one arm on the ground and lifted the wood. I closed my eyes and plunged the sharp wood into my arm. I let out a scream as I did it again. Blood splattered around me and on my face. I would either be let go or die here fighting.

I leaned against the wall and held the wood up to my face. I braced myself and dragged it across my cheek. I pressed my hand to the injury and looked around. Still he was nowhere to be found. Did he think I wouldn't go through it all the way? I took the wood to my neck last, dragging it just enough across my throat for the lines to bleed a little.

"This is awfully pathetic of you." I looked up to see Alastor standing above me. He held his hands behind his back with his cane. He had an ugly smile on his face but his eyes told me he was upset. Good.

"I've been through too much," I gasped, “You either let me go or I end both our lives right here. I'm sure I'd be doing the world a favor." I looked him up and down.

He closed his eyes for a moment before snapping them open. "Very well." He grabbed my arm and roughly pulled me to my feet. "If that's what you wish."

The room disappeared and we were thrown back into the world. I stood alone in a dark alley. There was no sign of the Radio Demon anywhere. I didn't recognize what town I was in but that didn't matter. I had succeeded.

I wiped away the blood as best I could. The sun was setting so trying to move around in the daylight looking the way I did wasn't the smartest. I sat behind one of the dumpsters and waited. As happy as I was to be back on my own, I had to start from the very bottom. All of my money I saved had disappeared when Alastor had taken me. But I could do this.

Eventually, the sun set and the town was thrown into shadows. I had fallen asleep for a few minutes. I was abruptly woken by the sound of yelling. I poked my head around the dumpster right as a young boy ran into the alley. A man was chasing after him and kicked the small child into the wall with ease. He grabbed the boy's head and lifted him to his feet.

"You'll do just fine in the rings," the man laughed, "If you make me enough money maybe I'll let you go."

"You'll do no such thing." I stood up and faced the man.

"Who do you think you are, whore?"

"The person who'll end your pitiful life in this lonely alley."

He laughed and lowered the boy so his feet could touch the ground. He dragged the boy with him as he strode over to me. The man was much larger than me, clearly all muscle. That meant he was slower. He would be easy to fight. That was until I saw him withdraw a knife. He caught my chin as I jumped back. I rolled back onto my feet and jumped onto the dumpster. I cast wind down the alley and tried to push him off balance. He planted his feet, still gripping the child, and fought against the wind.

I let out a tense sigh. One more time. Just one more. For the boy.

I used the wind to jump overhead then between his legs. I jumped around him like a rabbit, never staying in one place for too long. He couldn't land anything on me, growling and yelling at me to stay still. I covered my hand in fire and grabbed the hand holding onto the boy. He jerked his hand back and nearly stabbed the boy as I pulled him away. I pushed the boy behind the dumpster and jumped around the man again.

I caught the man's hair on fire, watching him drop the knife to put it out. I grabbed the knife and buried it into the man's throat. He sputtered as he dropped to his knees, eventually falling on his back. The blood pooled around his twitching figure.

Clenching my teeth, I turned around to see the boy staring wide eyed at the dead body. I looked down at my own hands and stared at the dark blood staining them. I kept the dumpster partly between me and the boy as I knelt down to his level.

"You're safe to go home now," I told him.

"I don't...I'm not..." the boy couldn't place the words but I already knew. He was an orphan who was probably on his way back when the man found him. They always went after orphans. Who would look for a child with no parents or guardians to care for him?

I went over to the dead man and wiped his blood off as best I could with his clothes. My skin was still stained but it wasn't coating them like before. I turned to the boy and held out a hand. He ignored the hand and buried himself deeper in the corner of the brick wall and dumpster. I couldn't leave him in an alley next to a dead body. Jail wasn't a good option either.

A sigh left my lips as I carefully and slowly lifted the boy up. He looked to be around six years old. He clung to my shoulders but his eyes didn't leave the dead body. I walked to the other end of the alley and disappeared down the street. I had to find the orphanage before I could take care of myself tonight.

I had barely gotten a single block before I stopped dead in my tracks. Striker stepped out of the shadows with his toothy smile plastered on his face. I gripped the child tighter and took a step back. Fear dipped in my stomach as my old master locked eyes with me.

"It's been such a long time, Python," he greeted. "What have ya been up to?" I swallowed hard. This wasn't happening. Surely this wasn't happening to me. I had to run. I had to get away. I had to make sure this child was safe but I had to run. Where should I even run to?

I turned tail and ran. The boy clung to me for dear life as I made sharp twists and turns down various streets. Why wasn't there anyone on the streets? Where were the people? Where were the police? I needed help.

Striker stood at the end of one street then the next. How was he moving so fast? Why isn't anyone noticing? I was in the center of a city. Where is everyone? How do I get the boy to safety before I take care of myself?

"Striker I can...we can..." I backed myself into a fenced off corner. I could feel the boy crying as his tears drenched my shirt. "Just wait. We can work something out."

"Work something out?" he hissed, "You ran and embarrassed me years ago. You think I'm about to let you work something out?"

"I can't...I didn't...I'll make a deal!"

He stopped, eyes widening. "You? The great Python who never makes any deals suddenly wants to make one now?"

I looked behind him and yelled, "Help!" He turned to see no one. I casted myself up to the flat rooftop and nicked my knee on the edge. I dropped the boy and pushed him away. A lasso tightened around my ankle and pulled me back over the edge. I hit the opposing wall and landed awkwardly on my leg. I screamed from the pain and rolled over on my back.

Striker planted a heavy foot on my chest and wrapped a lasso around my neck. He pulled on it so our faces were inches from each other. "You're coming back with me and making up the five years you missed."

I tried pulling on the insanely tight rope. "You'll have to get me there discreetly first."

"Oh you don't know, do you?" His smile turned smug and the rattle of a snake could be heard.

"Know what?"

"The mayor of this city declared all ring fights legal. And he's not the only one who did either."

"Ring fights aren't legal," I growled.

He grabbed my arm and pulled me to my feet. I limped badly as he dragged me to the street. Keeping me up with one arm, he led me down the sidewalk with his rope still around my neck. People had hidden in their homes and were daring a peak through their curtains.

"Take a look, sweetheart," Striker said. "And how lucky you are to have wandered into the right town."

Wandered. I hadn’t wandered into it. Alastor had put me here because he knew it had legalized ring fights. He had done it on purpose. But why would he willingly let me go back into the ring fighting? Wasn't he worried about me getting killed?

I tripped in the midst of my limping and jammed my knees into the pavement. Striker laughed and waited for me to stand up, hands planted on his hips. "Why?" I asked.

"Why what?" His smile turned into a snarl.

"Why do you want me? I gave you years of fighting and good money. Surely you can let me go after all that."

He pulled the rope up and grabbed my chin so I would meet his eyes. He answered, "You dampened my reputation. No one had ever escaped my claws before except you. No one wanted to trade me their winning piece when I couldn't even contain my own. This is your payback." He pulled the rope even higher, forcing me to clamber to my own feet.

"We'll see the healer tonight and your first fight will start tomorrow." He grabbed my arm again and led me down the street. I had failed. I had gone from bad to worse to bad again. I had been lucky to escape the way I did. I wouldn't be able to do it again and not soon enough with no trust between us. Building that master-servant trust would take years after this.

I dropped to the ground again. "You'll have to drag my dead body, first," I snarled. I sent a heap of fire at his face but he deflected it with ease. He wrapped his claws around my throat and pinned me to the cold concrete.

"Don't think I won't," he snapped, "I'll break your other foot and arm if I have to. You can always be fixed." The corners of my vision darkened around him.

His weight was abruptly lifted off and my vision restored. I coughed to the side and pushed myself up. My eyes widened to find Alastor standing near my feet facing Striker. I inched backwards as Striker did the same. His hands were tight in fists but each step was a step backwards, not forward.

"Are you willing to lose your life over her?" Alastor asked. He remained in his calm pose with his staff in front of him.

"You don't participate in ring fights. What do you want her for?" Striker demanded. "She's been under my service for most of her life."

"That's for me to know and you never to find out."

Striker looked between the Radio Demon and me. His eyes were gauging the surroundings, desperately trying to determine if this was a fight he could win. Though both he and I had yet to hear of someone beating the Radio Demon.

"She'll be mine soon enough," Striker said and slithered down a street. By the time Alastor had turned to face me, I was gone, limping down another street.

Alastor appeared from the shadows and perched himself in front of me. He had a smile but he wasn't showing his teeth this time. "That was quiet interesting."

"I know what you're trying to do," I jutted a finger at him. I leaned against the wall to get off my injured foot. "You did this to me on purpose. You're trying to make me grateful for you."

"So what if I am?" He put his hands up like sharp ugly flowers. "After all, you should be grateful. You could carry on with a life in the rings or spend it in a distant safe house with nothing to worry about ever again.”

"It's a cage."

"To you, my dear, everything is a cage." He walked over and put his hand out to me.

"What?" I looked between his red eyes and his dark claws.

"Are you ready to return home now?"

I almost wished he had just teleported me back without asking. I didn't want to touch him let alone take his hand. Who knew if he had conjured up some kind of magic deal that solidified when I grabbed his hand?

And yet, when I looked around at the quiet, dangerous town, I knew there wasn't another option. He would keep looking for me and a Full mage with his power could most certainly find me with ease. I didn’t want to go back in that cellar. All because I had the worst luck in the world and had him as a soulmate.

I looked down at my feet and took his hand.

[hype-blue-fixation]

RadioStatic Week Day 3 - Jealous/Posessive - "Your Laugh is Mine" (SFW ticklefic)

All day he'd kept his claws off the Radio Demon and let him go about his daily business. Forced to watch as the object of his obsession talked to other people. Conducted business with them, made small talk, cracked jokes. He hated how they made him laugh and smile. How those people gave him what he wanted. Vox knew he could do better.

And it was worst with the ladies. Alastor was far too kind to them. To the point it made Vox sick. The only time he even felt the smallest pang of guilt over these emotions is when the lady was Rosie. He respected the deep connection the two shared. But if it be anyone else, jealousy was sure to run rampant.

As the day went on, Vox became more fidgety. His body itchy. Everything in him wanted that furry deer back home and in his arms. Evening felt like it couldn't come soon enough. He was already daydreaming of all the things he wanted to do, making the wait all the more agonizing.

“I'm back!” the door clicked open and in came Alastor. Vox was already there, offering to takr his jacket and even unlace his shoes. Dinner was ready. Jazz music played on the radio. Whatever the deer wanted was only a whim away. “I think you love me too much.” Alastor cooed as he was lead to the dinner table.

“Nope. I love you just enough.” Vox held out a cooked human hand, humming in adoration as Alastor leaned forward to nibble each finger off. A playful look coming to his face.

“You love me so much you're even hand-feeding me!”

Vox snorted at the double meaning. Such a charming sense of humor. “Speaking of loving you so much…” his voice trailed off as he lost himself in Alastor's eyes. A small nibble at his own fingers shook him out of the daze with a frightened shout. As much as he loved the other, he was still a beast to be reckoned with. A unique, dangerous, and downright gorgeous beast.

The TV headed man offered more food. Smiling as it was gingerly eaten away. “I couldn't help but watch how you interacted with everyone today. They gave you what you wanted. Satisfied you. Made you smile. Laugh.”

“Mhm. What's your point?” Alastor smacked his lips, signaling he was done with dinner. Vox wiped the blood from his mouth, losing himself in those eyes again. They were always so expressive, and right now they were full of love and interest. Wondering what fantasies had been running through that dumb box head.

They went to bed, Alastor the first to settle down and get comfortable. Vox was right at his side. Wasting no time in getting his claws on that furry belly. Scratching at it and digging in possessively. “This soft little thing? It's mine.” His voice was strong. Not accepting any sort of argument. Whatever Alastor tried to say was silenced at the feeling of a tummy kiss.

Warmth focused on the mouth area of Vox’s screen as he planted kisses at the waist line. He gently pushed up Alastor's shirt as he trailed kisses up to his belly button. Then a blue tongue projected out of his screen to draw buzzy lines around the sensitive spot.

“Vox, darling. You don't have to–”

“I want to.” A firm grip came on his sides as warm kisses and electronic licks graced that fuzzy deer belly. Alastor couldn't help but fluster at the tender care. One hand rested on the back of Vox’s head while the other came up to his mouth to hide the noise that wanted to come out. A task that became harder when the hands on his sides began lightly scratching the soft body.

Alastor was now biting into his hand. Desperate attempts to hold back noise. Vox was quick to tug it away. “I want to hear you. Are you really going to let all those other people hear your beautiful voice and laughter all day then keep it hidden from me?”

“I suppose that is unfair of me, hmm?”

“It's criminal.” Vox blew a strange, vibrating form of a raspberry square on that belly button. Tickling his claws into the sensitive sides. A loud laugh echoed in response. “See, I bet that felt good, right?”

“It does feel good to let loose and laugh.”

“Good! Because all those laughs are mine, you hear? Every sound you make tonight will be mine.” Vox stared directly into Alastor's eyes as his claws scribbled around the belly button. Small giggles ensued. “Every little whine, laugh, breath, wheeze, beg, and whatever comes in-between is mine.”

“No it's not!” Alastor playfully teased.

The claw dipped into the center of that tummy with a small electric shock. That seemed to bring the radio demon back into his place with a storm of uncontrollable laughter.

“Yes. It. Is.”

[fandomworld9728]

Dance With Me, Kiss Me - Chapter 2:

Okay. He was now dancing with Alastor. And everyone was staring at them. Lucifer wasn't nervous because of all the eyes on them. Nope. Nope, no, no siree. Why had the other demon asked him for a dance anyways? They had had been wallflowers all night.

"You mentioned something about a re-do kiss?"

"Oh. That's what this was about. Well, it was Lucifer's idea. He didn't mind helping out. he had been in a similar situation after all.

~

"Isn't it so great that they're finally getting along?" Dancing with her girlfriend, Charlie had been secretly watching over Alastor and her dad. Especially after they started to dance together.

The pair had been getting closer in such a short time. It just proved to the princess that her intuition was right and that her team building exercises were working! She could almost burst from happiness.

"Yeah. That sure is great babe... but are you sure them becoming friends is a good idea? We all know that Alastor wants nothing more than power."

"What? No. Vaggie it's fine. Alastor wouldn't use my dad like that. Even if he tried, my dad is smarter than most people give him credit for. And is powerful enough to handle himself."

"Then why are they going off in private with serious looks on their faces?"

The two girls shared a look, wondering if they should follow the two demons. Just in case.

~

Once alone in one of the many extra rooms, Lucifer closed and locked the door behind them. Privacy and all. He wanted to make sure Alastor would be comfortable.

"What made you change your mind?" While waiting for his answer, not wanting to rush the Overlord, the fallen angel started to set the mood in the room.

"I... have been thinking about what you said. Between that and being subjected to dear Charlie's affections with her other half... It all has me quite curious."

Turning to face the devil, Alastor was surprised by the new additions. There was a fireplace and candles all around the room, lit, and giving off a dim yet cozy light. A furry rug was laid down in front of the fireplace and sat in the middle of it was Lucifer. He looked... stunning.

Gone was his jacket leaving him in his white button down, a few of the buttons undone. His ridiculous hat was also missing, allowing the usually slicked back golden locks to fall in his face. The light of the flames bouncing off him really tied it all together, reminding Alastor that this small, depressed man had once been a happy and graceful angel.

"What... is all of this?"

"I figured I'd try and set the mood. You know, try and make it special and memorial. In a good way."

This man... honestly. Alastor never knew what to think of him. Taking a seat next to Lucifer, the radio demon tried to calm himself. There was nothing to be scared or nervous about. It was just him and Lucifer. Then why was his heart beating so quickly?

"Hey. Al. It's okay. We don't have to do this." 

~

"The door is locked. What could they be doing in there?"

"The lights don't seem to be on- is that fire?!"

"What?!" Pulling out her keys, Charlie fumbled a bit, almost dropping them in the process, and quickly unlocked the door. Afraid of what she'd find, Charlie flung the door open and let out a loud and long happy squeal at what greeted her.

There was no disaster. No mess. No fighting. It was just her dad and Alastor. Kissing! Covering her mouth to try and muffle her joyful squealing, the princess was disappointed that she had disturbed them as she watched them jump away from each other.

However, they weren't quick enough to separate before the others had come running to see what had their friend screaming. 

"Ha! I told you bitches! Now pay up!"

"Angel!"

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[who-is-this-weirdo]

Do you have any hot takes about Hazbin hotel or helluva boss?

I mean, depends on what you call hot takes, for someone in the critical side it's basic and blend, but for most HH/HB fans it's blasphemy soooo:

- The series is not as progressive or as profound as yall seem to think

- The fandom is way too toxic and agressive over Redesigns and Aus, people have to say that they don't hate Vivziepop to be left alone, you don't see that even in other "toxic" fandoms such as Steven Universe, Mlp, or even fandom I don't really like, like the Dream smp or MHA, most of the time, people actually enjoy redesigns, the hate is very specific to THAT fandom

- HH/HB fans don't need safespaces in relation to being fans of these works, there's actual fandoms which are being hatecrimed (like furries), stop being so sensitive over small mockeries when some can get threatened with murder and doxxing

- There should be less sex humor and more death/gore humor, I've seen some people call this series "trash" (not in the garbage sense, but in the gore/violent sense) and I simply do not see why, this series is safe as fuck, asside from episode 4 which gave me a panick attack but that wasn't because of gore

- The treatment of rape is trash, full stop, Viv and Raph are rape fetishist and should not have worked on something about that topic

- Abusers in those shows are too obviously evil, that's not how that works, my dad used to beat and verbally abuse me but he's a strong dude, with humor, who liked to help neighbors, so no one really saw what he did as bad, some really young kids actually saw that I was scared of being in trouble with him and used that to their advantage, it's been a long time but it still haunts me

- Making your main canibal character (Alastor) black is kind of playing off of racist stereotypes, the fact that he doesn't even look remotely black and was made a black dude only so Viv could keep using and demonizing a religion is also gross

- Female characters are written horribly

- Two characters who are coded as autistic get a joke about them being raped