#i know everythings gonna be okay but im really fucking upset right now !!! haha

[kaleidoskuls]

OF COURSE SHIN TOOK A KNIFE TO THE BACK FOR SAINT OF FUCKING COURSE HE DID

[garrothromeave]

let’s talk about minecraft diaries rebirth.

and why it’s literally amazing. (warning: this will contain spoilers. lots of them. also, long post ahead.)

i think a lot of people hate mcdr because they were expecting a remake; but the point of rebirth is for jess to rewrite it. it wasn't supposed to be exactly the same.

honestly i went into mcdr with a closed mind. as an og mcd fan, i thought that this was going to suck ass and that i'd rant about how bad it was to my friends later. but actually watching it, i just... couldn't help but immediately fall in love with it.

ik im probably the only motherfucker that likes mcdr, but honestly how could i not? for one, garroth and zenix actually have personalities at the beginning. AND; the villagers? actually amazing. donna made me smile, visher made me laugh and cry, brendan was just bein as good as ever. like... i even didn't despise emmalyn with every ounce of my soul like i usually do?? the characterizations of them were GOOD, man.

and honestly, aphmau like--the way she spoke, her whole thing. it was reallyyy well done in my opinion. she was oblivious to things, but it wasn't overdone and wasn't done in a way to make her annoying. she's a very appealing character in mcdr, a main protagonist i do not mind following along with. her dynamics to the characters are really cool and all very unique.  gonna cut it here so i don’t clog y’all’s feed cuz i got a lot to say :)

the early use of aphmau’s powers was actually pretty cool as well, it also really showed how clueless aphmau really was to everything going on around her. AND UH, THE FACT THAT SHE THOUGHT THAT GARROTH FELT FAMILIAR? GOLDEN. absolutely golden.

AND GENE OH BOY, the early introduction of gene? ik a lot of people are upset about it, but god DAMN i love it so much. his role in the story is very important in original, and i cannot express how much joy this brought me learning that he was actually getting the proper attention for it. and the fact that gene and aphmau were working together?? i mean ik gene was just trying to use her to get back to the "shadow abyss" (pretty pog replacement for the nether, gg) but god DAMN i loved every moment of it. i found their dynamic to be pretty fuckin funny to be honest, would absolutely love to see more of it.

i might be biased considering gene is one of my absolute favorite characters, but i honestly think that introducing gene this early on in the story was a good move. again, he's literally the right-hand man to the shadow lord. it makes you really wonder why he didn't have as much of an important role in season 1 or even 2 of the original mcd plotline. also, we get some of that good-ol-fashioned exposition with seeing early on how vylad and gene interact. vylad’s at a very strange point in the story right now; his motives are unclear, even to the side he’s ‘supposed’ to be taking (aka, a shadow knight.)  another early introduction to a character is zane! this, my friends, is good. really good. i’d say that zane is the main antagonist of season 1 in the original series--and he wasn’t even introduced until like, episode 50. it’s not necessarily a bad thing, but him being introduced this early on really gives the audience a better understanding of what threats are out there and what our protagonist will have to encounter in the future. in the original series, there’s not much explanation as to why lords are disappearing/dying left and right--and while yes, that was supposed to be the mystery of it, having some of that early information is a better move in terms of writing. 

AND IVAN?? BEING A PART OF THE JURY OF NINE?? I COULD NOT HAVE ASKED FOR ANYTHING MORE LIKE GOD DAMN that was a very pleasant surprise i'll just say that, thank you jess :)

and no i did not loop the 4 minutes of screentime laurance got in that one episode haha who would do that i would never do that anyways

SPEAKING of laurance, im so glad jess actually wrote him in this early :) she totally could have just waited for the first time aphmau visits meteli and meets him there, but no! she put him in an early episode. i dont even care if she did it just to shut up the fans about laurance but man that made me so happy seeing him, even if it was only for a bit.

okay i kinda wanna go over the guards real fast firstly; garroth. ignoring how weird the helmet showing emotions is, i really like how garroth is portrayed. he's under a lot of pressure because the village is putting a lot of the blame on him for malik's death, and he's trying his hardest to keep things running. the fact that garroth utterly refused the to take up the position of lord and even got a little snappy about it was actually really cool to see as well. and while he doesn’t have that same “reserved, quiet, observant” feel as the original mcd version of him had, this version of garroth is absolutely awesome. he’s more direct and blunt, is significantly more sarcastic, and isn’t as stiff or as much as a pushover as he is in the original. he even has a sense of humour. also, no homo, but he’s kinda adorable.  plus, the desperation that he goes through during the whole thing is just--it’s really cool to see how hard he’s trying to prove himself and help the village. my rating for mcdr garroth? 9/10. the helmet... the helmet is the main thing throwin me off, i can’t lie. next, zenix. oh BOY do i have a lot to say about this man. first of all, his and garroth’s dynamic is incredible. when i saw how the interacted with each other, my first thought was: father and son. zenix has this immaturity to him that is so fucking fun and interesting to watch, and seeing how garroth scolds him is so fuckin good man. and! seeing how he interacts with the rest of the village... honestly, if jess ever picks this story up again, i would probably cry when zenix (literally) backstabs garroth. HELL, i hope that’s something that still happens, it’d be heartbreaking to witness this character that we’ve come to love hurting his mentor, the man who took him in. he’s just a really good character all in all, and much more appealing than the original mcd zenix. ...except season 3 zenix. no zenix can be better than that one.  either way, zenix is amazing written to be the comic relief and he’s just an all-out lovable character in this series.  finally, dale and brian. yes i’m going to group them up because there’s not much to say regarding them, but i do want to address them. for starters, we have brian; who’s already 16 when the story starts. good on jess for doing that, because in the original aphmau watched brian be born and age INCREDIBLY quick, haha. THOUGH i do feel like there’s a slight connection lost there--one of the hardest things about brian’s betrayal in the original series in the fact that we watched him grow up in phoenix drop. we were there from the moment he was born, to the second he betrayed phoenix drop. BUT OF COURSE, this version is a lot more realistic, so it’s understandable. i just think that if it’s brian who’ll be betraying phoenix drop again (if it even goes down that same route), it won’t hit as hard unless jess really takes the time to grow the connection between brian and aphmau.  as for dale; gotta admit, love it. and like, i think one of the main things about how good of a call it was to make him a drunkard from the beginning is considering how much the village is struggling. the fact that the second-in-command is literally drunk all of the time really conveys the message of, “yeah. this village needs help.” plus, he’s another good comic relief character. i loved seeing molly and dale’s relationship too, it was very funny.  PLUS. we were blessed with a well scene, in which aphmau had to help villagers out of the well. i don’t know about you guys, but that was one of my favorite nods to the original series. i cannot thank jess enough for that, there was a smile on my face the entire time. another amazing thing--visher’s character. instead of just being introduced to this quirky lil merchant who only had one or two interactions with aphmau like in the first one, we got to sit there and really get a feel for someone worth remembering and worth mourning over. we had a reason to be sad over his death, it wasn’t just some npc getting blown up suddenly. this was different, and this hurt.  one of the major things that i hope is to come out of this is for jess to fix the major mistakes she had when writing the first series. she’d expressed how unhappy she was with some of the decisions she made, and i’m glad that she’s getting that second chance to undo the things she didn’t like. this series also gives her a second chance to really, really dig into characters and their motives. like, gimme laurance backstory in better detail. or like, garroth and zane’s relationship from back when they were kids? or how vylad died and who killed him? etc etc. she’s already done an excellent job so far, and i can’t wait to see where this goes. that is, if she ever continues it. god, i wish there were more episodes so that i could seriously let you guys know how beautiful of a series this is. there’s so much i want to say about rebirth, but i think i’ll stop here. i might say some more shit about it later, but if there’s anything i’d want you to take away from this, it’s: give minecraft diaries rebirth a chance. there’s a lot of potential, and this is a chance for jess to really change things for the better! ... but again, that is if this ever is continued. 

[rhaenyraisadyke]

Unhealthy Competition Transcript: 8/4/21

Heres the transcript on a google doc if thats easier!

W: What do we want?

R: Burgers!

W: When- When, when do we want the burgers?

R: When they're cooked because if we get them now wait they are actually cooked right now but it would be raw if we immediately gave them out to the customers which is why we DO cook our food.

W: Wh-a what are you on there! They are cooked! Look! Does that not look cooked?

R: I- I mean.. Ah it looks fine it looks fine

W: I’ve never tried one of our own burgers before

R: Oh yeah we should've done that before- a while ago

W: Leme do it lemme do it lemme do it lemme do it lemme do it leme do it right, I need to get hungry first

R: mhm

W: Let me just quickly slap a Wilburger in there, leme leme just

R: there we go

W: I’m gonna get hungry

R: Alright let's get hungry

W: Wooh wooh wooh, how’ve you been Ranboo?!

R: I’ve been doing good!

W: Have you been vibing?

R: I’ve been doing alright! Yeah! I had a good rest, I’ve had a good day

W: Mhm, mhm

R: So far you know i'm excited to get to working the nine to five, it's a dream.

W: Wait, I don’t make you work nine to five- you just have to work when we run out of burgers man. You’re free to do what you want, this is your- you’re working part time for wilburger- oh it's the horse! We need that

R: OH yeah we should probably, we should probably,

W: I want that horse, aye! Do you know what quackity’s horse is called? Okay I’m hungry now, I’m hungry now, are you ready for this?

R: okay, alright

W: Bread first, burger, mmmm Ranboo… we gotta to better than that

R: Oh, okay

W: Ranboo that's the best burger I’ve ever had

R: Nice!

W: But we gotta do better than that

R: Okay, then to volume two.

W: WE are taking down an entire nation with this burger van- oh sorry competing peacefully outside of this burger van, we can't have just the best burgers I've ever had- they have to be the best burgers anyones ever eaten in their entire lives

R: In any universe!

W: In any universe in any universe at all, at all. You’ve done a really good job of this I know I’ve already said that but yeah

R: Thank you thank you, yeah

W: this is fun, I like this little toy you’ve made, I like this, i'm a big fan

R: I like it too, thank you.

W: I’m a big fan of a lot of things we have done Ranboo. Do you remember they um, boom boy?

R: yeah.. I do remember that.

W: Yeah?

R: Yeah.. I hope it didn't I hope it didn't, it wasn't, hopefully it wasn't too much, I don’t think it was too much

W: Oh I thought it was great I thought it was great man, when you smashed the window and blew up the wall- I’d be pissed

R: Mhmm

W: And I bet that was the right stick it to the man that he needed

R: But, butm you, you wanted that for competition, for business and all that, right?

W:... yeah

R: Yeahhhh

W: Yeahh, hmm, Ranboo I think you’ve taken a side here which feels like a change for you. I’m not used to this, you’re mister not choosing a side you know?

R: Yeah, yeah, because when I looked back especially when- especially after, your talks about Lmanburg and everything I realised

W: Look back on what?

R: You know, when you looked back on like Lmanburg and everything

W: Oh like life and all that

R: Yeah I decided to take a look back on my life and everything and I realised that I mean I’ve been involved in things, but, I haven't really done anything, I haven't really done anything

W: What do you mean?

R: I haven't made anything like, I haven't really, I haven't really done much to alter history, now if you were to write a history book, I wouldn't really be that much you know…

W: Whatttt

R: Involved in it

W: I don’t think, I don’t know what you’ve done, I don't..

R: Exactly, that proves my point

W: But you don’t need to have an impact on the world Ranboo to matter you know? You don’t need to go out, you don’t need to build a fucking effile tower just to be, just to mean something.

R: Yeahh

W: Ranboo, Ranboo don’t get me wrong

R: Yeah

W: You’re talking to me here I think it could be that you, you know, are going out and doing stuff. Look at this bozo

R: What he's doing here?

W: I think it could be that you decided to go out and change you know change this, I think change things for the better.

R: You know it's -

W: Don’t don’t start go out and breaking windows and blowing up walls just because you,

R: Oh no I won’t probably not too much

W: Just because you want to make something

R: This is why I like our little, little burger shop, you know it's small but at least it's something, you know I’ve always I’ve always wanted to go and make something that's gonna outlive me a little bit so I think this, I think this is a good start to something.

W: Mhm mhm

R: It’s a nice little burger shop you know?

W: And man? Honestly, I’m proud of you bro. I know, I know I don't know you very well man and I haven't known you for very long but you’ve done a really good job here and tell you what tell you what?

R: Thank you

W: Have you ever seen the phrase “fruits of your labor”?

R: Yeees, I- I think! I think so

W: Shall we see the fruits of our labour? Cause Quackity, quackitys online

R: I mean

W: Quackitys online, Quackitys here man

R: Oh!

W: We can go, we can go and see and chat with him about what we did. By the way after you blew it up I know you didn't see but I gave him back all the materials because

R: That's good

W: I gave him back all the materials for the wall and I also, I also left him a diamond or two just to say like you know no hard feelings you know?

R: Mhm

W: That it was just for, just you know, to prove a point but um yeah Quackitys here, and I wanna see. Do you want to ride a horse? Here, get on the horse.

R: You want me to uh?

W: Yeah yeah, it's Quackity’s its quackitys horse just a disclaimer

R: It’s quackitys? Oh oh okay,

W: Normally when I come to the las nevadas sign as im not allowed in las nevadas, normally when I come to the las nevadas sign Quackity is the first one to come and tell me to fuck off so lets see, lets go up to the las nevadas sign.

R: Alright

W: Yeah man its half the fun of making something and doing cool things is that moment where um, where you get to see what everyone feels about it now that we are here I promise wait here, I promise you

R: Wait.. wait here? Okay

W: Just you wait… Ready?

R: Alright, i'm ready

W: Um um “boy las nevadas sure is big from up here” just hold on

R: Okay um okay

W: Just give it a second, maybe from this level, hmmm maybe if I take another step, ooh what's that?

R: Oh yeah OH do you remember the cookie outpost thing?

W: Yeah yeah the little thing you built with tubbo

R: Yeah so basically right he got really upset so then I- I tried to apologise and everything because we- there was a little bit of dispute with it but we honestly just decided to really just give up.

W: I mean he hasn't accepted it… look its all in there

R: He hasn't accepted it?

W: Yeah, it's all in there….

R: Oh he said he liked it at least…

W: Is- did I just lie? This guy, Ranboo I swear to god I feel like I understand him, how his brain works, how he how his mind go and then he just, just proves that he doesn't give a shit.

R: Yeahh

W: Which is why I can’t wait to show off what I’ve done, but he's just nowhere to be seen. So this cookie shop thing? What was your intention of it? How would how you don’t pick sides usually but what was your intention with it? When you built this?

R: To give out cookies to people

W: And that was it? And that was your be all and end all hah?

R: Yep

W: Right, well how did you feel about Tubbo doing what he did then?

R: Doing what he did… What do you mean?

W: Well he.. He I heard the stories man I heard about how it turned into more than what it was supposed to be you know?

R: Well I mean that's- he kind of goes above and beyond on a lot of things, you can’t really blame him into make it a castle. That's, that's just you know, you can’t be TOO careful. Especially when you know, he has all the right to be nervous about something going wrong, so no wonder he put all those defenses and everything.

W: Why would he have the right to be nervous?

R: I mean just a lot of things, a lot of bad things have happened to him that haven't really come from his actions

W: Oh so youre talking about.. oHHHH LOOK WHO'S HERE!

Q: Hellloooooo

W: Quackity!! It's lovely to see you man, it's been awhile. How have you been?

Q: How- how long have you guys been here for?

W: I-I just arrived you know I just- Quackity you think I would wait for you? You know you know I’m just a

R: Yeahh

Q: Well I didn't even notice you guys were here. I um have been busy with uh much more important things… so, but hey I mean it's great to see you guys it's really great to see you guys, Wilbur and Ranboo together this is uh

W: It’s good to see you man

Q: What's this?

W: Oh uh Ranboo was just looking after your horse that I um

R: Mhm!

W: That I took a little bit of a joyride, it's a good horse look at it, look how high it jumps man! You got a good horse man

Q: Yeahhh who told you that's my horse?

W: Well it was tied up in your nation

Q: haha no no that's not my horse you just got someones random horse, i think you should probably put it back, I have no idea whose it is That- this is really awkward Wilbur, you should, you should probably put it back

W: Let's go! Let's go dude. I wanted- I wanted to come and ask you a question.

Q: Yeah, yeah what's up?

W: So I don’t know if you saw this? Uh you can’t actually see it, but behind this we built a burger van quackity!

Q: Really???

W: Competition, competition

Q: You built a burger van? Is that what you’ve been up to wilbur?

W: Yeah yeah!

Q: You know all this time you’ve been settled next to me and this- this is uh your big ceration? A burger van?

W: Hey man

Q: Hahah,

W: Rome wasn't built in a day. Small steps

Q: That's true, that's true. Leme take a look. Can you order anything yet?

W: No no, wait lemme- actually let me cook you up something real quick

R: Oh yeah oh yeah, you'll love this

Q: I don’t know if i trust anything coming from you Wilbur, but I’ll I’ll, give it a shot i'll give it a shot

W: Doo doot doo quackity you are so nice to me doot doo doot you never bring up my past doot doo doot Here you go, one volume one wilburger. Take a bite of that!

Q: Volume one?

W: Take a bite! It’s like an NFT Quackity

Q: An NFT?

W: Yeah no one, no ones gonna be copying that!

Q: Why would I bite it if its an NFT, then if it goes away it wouldn’t be worth anything,

W: Exactly Quackity, you can keep hold of it OR you get a bit peckish, eat the bread anyway! The bread is not bad

Q: I’m not hungry, I’m not that hungry right now but hey, I’ll keep it with me

W: At least keep it to appreciate the value, it's my NFT, but Quackity anyway I did want to ask, you have a little restaurant in your town I saw, from a distance obviously.

Q: Do you guys want to take a look? I didn’t want to mention it as I felt like it would have been awkward given that you have your own restaurant- I have my own restaurant, that's the only thing that would make it a little awkward but, you know you brought me to your restaurant and I want to bring you to mine. Can, can I do that?

W: Yeah, yeah man I just want, I just wanted to say sorry if you notice if you notice a bit of superficial damage, I left you a little gift as well, afterwards I sure that's okay. It was Ranboo and I that did that to your restaurant actually.

Q: Yeah yeah I saw it in the signs you, you guys

W: Yeah Ranboo and I did it

Q: Yeah the signs no no

W: I just thought- it it was a little bit of a you could say a misclick

Q: It doesn't seem to be like a misclick. You said MY restaurant was wank

W: I did I did I forgot about the signs, I was talking more about the window- oh

Q: But its fine its fine actually and I actually want to take this moment to thank you guys actually because uh that little destruction you did made me realise that the non tinted glass it just wasn't a good fit for the restaurant so I went with the kind of you know neon look and oh oh yeah the explosion! Right, I uh thank you guys again I was just finishing up this fish tank.

(The fish tank has salmon in it)

This nice little fish tank in the restaurant I think it gives a nice little look, a nice touch you know a nice family touch so thank you guys- this made me realise this needed a little bit of work haha so I appreciate it. I appreciate it a lot um actually you know what?

W: what?

Q: You know what Wilbur? Your little game here whatever you did, it made me realise another thing, that my country needs a source of passive income, so I decided to assign a workforce to this restaurant, I decided to hire an employee…

W: YOU'RE FUCKING ME?? YOU'RE PISSING ME

T: Hello!!

Q: Haha! Hey Tubbo!

T: Hey

Q: Tubbo look who came to visit look who came to visit

W: Tubbo!! Man it's good to see you!

T: Hey man this is my new job!

W: Tubbo aww it's nice to see you here man, I thought you were with your, your little snowy town

T: Oh I decided that you know I needed you know a job somewhere to work

W: Tubbo… what the fuck?

Q: Ha ha yep!

W: Fuck tubbo! Why are you, why? Why? Why did you get employed at the restaurant?

T: Why well eh I mean you know? Job?

Q: Tubbo is an excellent employee

T: I- I didn’t know you guys did burgers! I didn't know…

W: I mean, I mean it's - I just dude I offered for you to come and work at my burger van, it was uh hh hh hhhh hugh I told you yesterday- I told you yesterday in the Lmanburg crater and said you should come and hang out and make burgers at my burger van and now your at another burger restaurant after turning down my burger restaurant. Quackity… What did you tell him? Quackity what did you tell him? What did you say man?

Q: Listen listen, I’m gonna tell you this right now, tubbo is one of the best employees I’ve ever had. Me and tubbo had a little talk and we realised he has really great aspirations in life, and he really wants to do a lot

W: mhm

Q: and I told tubbo I would offer him maybe one of the best jobs anyone can have

W: best job

Q: one of the only jobs in las nevadas- tubbo is actually not only an employee but he is managing this place

W: mhm mhmm

T: This is my establishment

Q: Yeah, yeah and tubbo, tubbo now owns it

(note ranboo now has a grass block and is holding it along with placing and picking it up and it pacing during all of this)

Q: Tubbo tubbo now manages this place and he cooks here and makes a great deal of economic prosperity as well for las nevadas uh you should try his food, you NEED to try his food he makes these burgers kind of NFTS wait what a coincidence, it's NTFS as well and he makes burgers, and I like to call it the tubburger

T: The tubburger joint.

Q: The funny thing is we called it the tubburger volume one as well! It's really weird haha our plates are the exact same

W: Shh shh shh, quackity… tubbo, are you? Are you aware we are in competition now? Like this, this, tubbo we have always been on the same side man, we have always been together… your head to head with me now

T: Well I don’t look at it like that, it's not like complicated competition.. .Competition is good for the consumers, it helps everyone!

Q: W- Wilbur you’re taking this a little too far man, I feel like

W: Wai-twait no no I am perfectly

Q: I think you’re taking it too far man!

W: I am perfectly happy with mr tubbo

Q: At the end of the day we are all friends

W: Where did you get the NFT idea from??! Where did ya get that idea from?

T: Fazeclan?

Q: Fazeclan

T: Fazeclan

Q: Fazeclan, wilbur listen I told you this once and I am gonna tell it to you again, thank you. Thank you for opening my eyes that whole renovation came to do because I’m assuming it was a kind of renovation it really made me realise it has more potential then I thought

W: MHmm

Q: And at the end of the day that's what we all need. That's what we need, we thrive, we thrive through competition…. Healthy competition you're gonna make your burgers better and i'm gonna make my whole restaurant better and with the help of seriously one of the greatest people I’ve met in a business like this

T: Aww thank you man

Q: of course, of course tubbo

W: So,

Q: Wilbur, don’t take it the wrong way

W: I- I’m not does it look like im-

Q: to be mad about it, it's good for us it's gonna be happy for everyone

W: I’m happy, I’m really happy for tubbo, I’m happy tubbo’s got a job

Q: Really?

W: Yeah, I’m happy for him. Tubbo you were telling me yesterday how you were, how you felt like you lacked direction, you lacked purpose

T: Yeah I finally have a goal

W: Bro!

Q: That's true

W: How could I be angry about that man?

R: Yeah… that's good

W: Just you know I was just wondering why you chose that over the burger van but I get it Quackity, Quackity is a hard man to refuse.

Q: Mhmm

W: And

Q: And tubbo, tubbo is just constantly looking for whats next whats gonna happen now, and me and tubbo we think alike, very much alike actually, and I don’t know if you remember this but me and tubbo, you remember lmanburg?

T: Yeah

Q: Me and Tubbo, Tubbo was president and I was vice president, this is like lmanburg all over again isn't it?

T: Well- I mean-

Q: This is all a working- work in progress

W: It’s giving me lmanburg vibes

Q: Mhm- sorry?

W: I said yes I agree its giving me Lmanburg vibes

Q: Yeahh. Well listen uh all i'm gonna say is wilbur we are doing our own thing, you guys are doing your own thing and be healthy competition and you know….

T: Well the best burgers win!

Q: Haha- there you go there you go tubbo I agree with that yes!

W: we- yeah Ranboo you agree with that may the best burgers- say it say it

R: yeah yeah, may the best burgers win… yep

W: Wilburger vs tuburger… match match partners against crime

T: Together!

R: No-t not crime we hate crime

Q: Tubbo tubbo you gotta try their burgers sometime

W: Well, well we gotta go we gotta go

T: oh?

R: Yeahh yeah

W: It was lovely, it was lovely hanging out with you guys I - I am just thrilled with the renovations. What should we do next time we hang out?

Q: Yeah yeah

W: Do you wanna we- like

Q: I think I think we should yeah let's set some time apart and talk you and me

W: Yeah let's have a little run through a little run through

Q: Yeah yeah absolutely, and ranboo wilbur, you guys are welcome in the restaurant, las nevadas anytime

W: Wait-

Q: Anytime you guys like

W: Wait, I'm allowed in Las nevadas?

Q: Wilbur, you’re not, you’re taking this the wrong way

W: You told me I couldn't come in

Q: What kind of person would I be to tell you to leave my country. What kind of person would I be to not allow you in my premises? I wouldmt be a good person would I? Wilbur, you are my friend … I would never do that to you. I’m very welcoming, Ranboo come ahead, come inside as well ah this is all this is all healthy competition alright?

W: You’re a good man, you’re a good man Quackity, I’ll I’ll give you that. We got some burgers to flip so we will

Q: We do too we do too

T: Bye guys!

W: thanks for coming, thanks for coming down

Q: Cya guys

W: Cya guys

Q: Bye!

W:Ranboo.. Ranboo lets go

R: Yeah…. Let's go….

W: ooooOOOHHHHH boy ha- ha… ha ahhh ohhh this is good, this is what I want dude dude Ranboo did you see he was trying to act like I didn’t get to him?

R: Mhmm mhmm

W: You see the WHOLE time ohh it's not my horse

R: Geeh I mean yeah I mean he did I’m pretty sure

W: Dude he made an NFT burgers

R: He made an NFT burger- that is true

W: He cares so much he cares so much

R: That was your idea yeah

W: He cares aww man- How did you feel about this Ranboo? I mean dude!

R: I mean it's just burgers and everything so I think it's okay.

W: Eh it's “just burgers”

R: Its okay you know

W: I feel alive Ranboo, I feel alive! Someone is looking at me and talking to me!

R: Yeah yeah!

W: I’m alive I’m alive this is great!

R: Yeah, yeah I mean yeah, I again don’t I have to get used to competition and everything and be out there more with it all

W: I feel you Ranboo I feel you its scary its scary man, especially when we have a long way to go, bridges to cross and one day grab it by the horns and ride it

R: Yeah yeah,

W: And not it's just, it's just you and me against the world. The world being tubbo and quackity.

R: mhm mhmm

W: I mean why would you be against being against tubbo and quackity anywhere? I mean how well do you know Quackity?

R: I- I mean I don’t really know Quackity- Quackity all too well

W: Yeah yeah and I mean what do you and tubbo have you know going on that would block this?

R: I mean…

W: Sounds great to me

R: I mean… yeah yeah I - we kind of had like that cookie outpost we did together and everything it's fine I don’t have to get to it too much I dont um really wanna

W: You’re both businessmen

R: I don’t really ah want to get into it all too much

W: And that's fine. Ranboo I wanted to ask you man

R: Mhm?

W: You’ve had this cookie outpost right?

R: Yeahh

W: Did you like to get up to anything at the cookie outpost? Is there anything…?

R: Ahh, not at the cookie outpost but I do have something else actually… follow me I do- I do have something else…

W: Is it a secret?

R: It's a secret , yes.

W: Should we sneak?

R: Yeah um I think we can just get far enough away I think we'll be fine

W: Where are we going?

R: Into the strip club

W: heh-sh haha haha

R: Comeon, come on let's go

W: ahhaa sorry say that again

R: Into the strip club- we are going in!

W: Lets go

R: I have- I have my little hole in the strip club

W: You got a strip hole?

R: Yes!

W: I’ve never been in here before

R: Well I mean for logs, I mean look at those spruce logs over there, those are stripped. Alright ah perfect it's still, it's still here

W: This doesn't look very hidden

R: Oh its hidden trust me

W: it's very cozy

R: Oh it's very cozy and well if you need to use this for something we can definitely expand a little bit, but probably not too much though because we don’t want to infringe on everything

W: I like this, I mean we can do a little bit now! How about what we do? I like this. I like the wherewithal, maybe we can build a tunnel from here to the burger van. It can be our way in sneaking in from the burger van. aH okay okay you got your finger in a few espionage spies, I appreciate that and no one knows about this?

R: Yeah no one knows about it, yeah I think- to the best of my memory no one knows about it.. There's like a 85% chance that's right

W: That's cool that's cool because at the end of the day we’re- going right now we are the good guys Ranboo, we are the good guys, we-

R: You sure?

W: We-.... yeah! I mean we haven't done anything wrong you know?

R: Yeah

W: we haven't done anything wrong and quackity, quackity done a few things wrong…

R: Yeah yeah

W: hmm hmm is tubbo working full time? What's tubbos deal you know with the burger place?

R: I don’t know I have no idea actually

W: We don’t know we just don't know

R: I Don't know anything about that.

W: It's like how good of an employer is quackity? So I wanted to make sure before I go knowing you have already done a little act of espionage with the strip hole and other things I just

R: Mmmhmm

W: I just wanna, I just wanna say in any case of an emergency right?

R: mhm

W: When we are head to head, you know when- not head to head with each other uh when we are head to head with tubbo and big q and stuff

R: mhm

W: and maybe shits ya know hitting the fan and stuff- I need to know, that we have a saviour card to save the innocent people in this city like tubbo

R: mhm

W: Like fundy and these innocent people

R: So yeah.. So like a plan B just in case anything goes wrong we can save them?

W: Yeah, plan B

R:Okay I'm down for that. What is this- (Wilbur gives Ranboo thirteen TNT)

W: I want you to make yourself useful and..

R: oh

W:Set that up somewhere in las nevadas. I have more, I have more I have another stack if you need it but I think that should be enough to do a marketable amount of damage if you- okay so the problem essentially is that TNT as you know TNT doesnt detonate in water and as you know las nevadas is quite a large majority of water bound. However, quackity really seems to care about the inside of the casino which I’ve peaked in and there's no water in and the outsides of this restaurant section of this spire right? So what you could do is easily make a section in the casino that has a chain reaction under a button somewhere and each one of those detoniates the next consecutive one. It would take a little bit of work, I know quite a bit about TNT, I could help you.

R: Mhmm

W: So

R: o-okay

W: Look dude I’m just letting you know that's what I want you to do. PArt of working-

R: But in most cases and everything it would never see the light of day right?

W: In most cases yeah 100% most of the time maybe it won't happen, BUT if we need to protect the innocent thats what its fore

R: Yeah yeah

W: Yeah you want to protect like fundy, slimecicle, tubbo?

R: Yeah! Yeah

W: So that's, so that's what it's for and Ranboo! I shall bid you adieu, it was a pleasure, thank you for coming

R: Yeah of course!

W: and thank you for being a good co worker, you know?

R: Yeah

W: You’ve done a good job and I can’t-

R: Thank you

W: I trust you will do good work with that TNT I gave you but remember, make it safe!

R: Yeah

W: We don’t want it going off by accident we don't want it

R: Yeah I’ll maybe it very safe

W: Promise?

R: Promise, yeah

W: And you’re gonna tell me where you put the button and you’re gonna tell me where it's set up and-

R: Yep!

W: Okay. Alright, thanks Ranboo

R: Yeah, thanks, I’ll see ya, buh bye

W: I’ll see you around Ranboo. What a nice guy!

[courtney-deserved-better]

whats ur writing schedule/process like! not in a “write faster” way, but i think once you mentioned writing in script form? and i like the way you wrote ur most recent fic! just curious bc ur works are just really good :)

this is a great question!!

if its not slippery slopes, ill usually get an idea for something and periodically jot down notes when they come to me until I feel like i have enough information to start writing (or if im just motivated), that's what i did for my horror challenge rewrite. and for stuff that's like... rewrites of an episode that aren't as character-focused as slippery slopes, i usually read the episode transcripts and try to replicate that total drama style with my own writing

for shorter oneshots, i usually just get a vague idea and run with it until i find a good ending spot, then i go back and clean it up a bit so the structure works

slippery slopes is an... interesting cycle. chapters are getting long enough that i cant just write them in one sitting any more (i think ch5 was the last chapter i did that for) and instead ill agonize over the beginning (always the hardest part to write for me) but once i get going with that i usually finish the chapter within a few days. then i reread the previous chapter to make sure it flows ok (and there aren't any contradictions) and then ill give myself a break where i dont do anything total drama related before coming back to edit and post. though before I do all that I type up notes and rough dialogue bits

and then once i post it it's like... a weight off my chest? like ive been purged or something?? idk its a weird sensation but im just like i Physically Cannot Write Anything For This Right Now and i don't start on the next chapter until that goes away. and then i either start the beginning and do nothing for a week before going back and finishing the chapter or i go into a manic state and write nonstop for a few days. right now i haven't reached a point where im ready to begin writing chapter 10 but i have a lot of notes for it.

(also as soon as i finish posting a chapter i try not to go on my laptop for like 12 hours so i don't obsessively refresh my email for comments. i love reading comments so much holy shit. please comment guys it makes fic authors feel so happy we will love you for it)

as for scripts: i am working on being a writer professionally, but specifically a playwright. writing in a script format comes more naturally to me than writing prose. funnily enough, i started posting fanfic just to practice my prose (and fix stuff in cobra kai that i didnt like) but things sort of... ended up here? idk man but im enjoying it.

right, so because writing in a script format is easier when im really struggling with a section in a fic ill usually scrap whatever i had and write it like a script, then translate that into prose. i was very excited to write the family videos for chapter 9 of slippery slopes, but i was Having Issues, so i redid it as a script and then rewrote that as prose. ill put the script version under the cut if you're interested in that.

but thank you so much for the question!! i do think my writing process is a bit unconventional but hey i think things are turning out well! if you have any more questions feel free to send them in!!

ok here is the last scene of ch 9 of slippery slopes in script format:

[SIERRA]

MOM: Hi honey! Omigosh this is so exciting! I bet you’re having such a great time! Especially since Chris is there! Is Chris watching this? Hi Chris! You know, I loooved you on that ice skating show. Your hair was fantastic! Well, it always is, haha. Do you really make your own hair gel? I’ve been trying to perfect the recipe but you’re just so hard to track down! Oh, you’re such a funny guy! I laughed sooo hard when you made all those jokes about marrying Chef.

Chef: hey!

Chris: ok just for the record, I wasn’t joking, we are married, Sierra tell your mom we’re married

Sierra: …can we just turn it off please

[COURTNEY]

DAD: Courtney, sayang, I know you’ve been going through a lot right now—

MOM: So you’d BETTER make it count. You’ve made it this far before, I want to see you getting all the way to the finale this time. And winning it. Enough moping about those hideous, good-for-nothing slackers! That’s what you get for hanging around freaks like them. You’re doing this for the million, now get the million. Is that clear?

ZARINA: And kick ass!

DAD: Zarina!

Video cuts out.

Alejandro: courtney you good?

Courtney: no, she’s right. Mama didn’t raise no quitter

Alejandro: [knows she’s still upset about duncan and gwen]

[ALEJANDRO]

MOM: Hola, Alejandro. We hope you are doing well, especially in such unsavory conditions. I’m glad to see you’ve made it to the final four— we expected nothing less, of course.

DAD: You have been utilizing your skills quite well. Though I wish you hadn’t been so… blatant about it. You’ll have to work twice as hard once this is over to convince people you’re trustworthy. But surely you were aware of that going into this… odd endeavor. That’s just politics. Reputation is everything.

JOSE: [snorts] Oh, and what a reputation you have, Al. I could easily compile hours of footage of your failures, but I, unlike you, do not waste my time on the frivolities of reality television. Though you always have been lacking in taste. Especially with that bratty girlfriend of yours— oh, my mistake, aren’t you dating the whiny weakling? It’s so hard to keep track! [laughs]

Alejandro: callate!

MOM: I’m sure Alejandro is just working an angle on them.

DAD: Whatever the case is, do not disappoint us.

[NOAH]

MOM: Hi Noah, I’m sorry, I don’t have time to record a full video, but I’m proud of you! Here are your sisters!

ISWARI: A million dollars? A million [bleep] dollars? Win it, Noah! Win it!

RUTH: Dude!! This is crazy! I know you can do this— good luck! Ark misses you! [holds up Ark who barks]

MARA: Are you insane? Why aren’t you dating Alejandro already?

Noah: shut up, mara, just because you can’t keep a boyfriend—

ANYA: Don’t let ‘em trick you! No mercy! Crush their skulls if you have to— no, wait, you’re not strong enough for that. We’ll get there!

LIYA: I say this as your sister, someone who loves you but is constantly annoyed by you— for someone who is quite literally a genius, you sure can be an idiot sometimes.

BALLARI: Okay, I literally have no idea how you’ve made it this far without an athletic bone in your body— are we sure you aren’t adopted? I’m kidding

ABS: You’re stubborn as hell when it comes to me, so you better be stubborn as hell when it comes to winning! And when you do win, get me a frozen yogurt machine, will you? I promise I won’t make you rock climb again!

JAEL: If you lose this, I’ll kill you with this racket. And then use your guts to make myself a new racket. So don’t fuck it up. Again.

Noah: [frozen, ashamed]

Sierra: well that was a mess

Courtney: ok show of hands, who felt better after hearing that? [no one raises hands]

Chris: yeah I was expecting this to be a lot more heartwarming…

Chef: chris just look at them. If they had stable home lives they wouldn’t be doing reality tv

Alejandro: can we please stop talking about this. Also aren’t you supposed to be flying the plane

Chef: oh fuck

Chris: yeah sure. I think im gonna call my mom

Everyone: …

Noah: ok so that was really shitty. Why dont we all go to first class and try and ignore our problems

Everyone: yeah ok sounds good

***

Courtney: so that sucked

Alejandro: at least your dad seems ok

Courtney: true. What are your guys dads like

Noah and Sierra: bold of you to assume I know my dad. Jinx

***

Alejandro: that last girl… you mentioned a sister who does tennis and hates you

Noah: yep

Alejandro: why?

Noah: none of your business. but… it is pretty justified

[words-for-holland]

Your Shoulder to Cry On

Pairing: Tom Holland x Reader

Summary: Y/N has been feeling down all day and Tom wants her to know that he’ll always be here for her.

Maybe it was just one of those Mondays, but today just seemed like the worst ones Y/N has ever experienced. Truthfully she didnt know how it happened. She was having a great morning, waking up in Tom’s arms, giving him his daily dose of kisses before he left to film, and actually getting her work done with time to spare.

But there was definitely a change in the wind that day and it all started with a...

Ding

With all the free time Y/N had she couldnt help but check her phone, guessing it was either Tom or her parents checking up on her, or maybe her hometown friends who are updating her on what’s going on with their new found adult life.

It was her friends all right...but the conversation was far from friendly. Arguments ensued from her three friends coming after each others neck and of course pulling..no...dragging Y/N unwilling into it. While she said no words, as she tried to find the best way to relieve the tension it was too late. Her good day had become the shittiest day of the week...and its only just begun.

Now abandoning her work, Y/N waits for her boyfriend to come home as she mindlessly scrolls through Instagram, only to see a notification pop up on her phone. Assuming it was another nasty text from her friends, she was much surprised to be welcomed a picture of her and Tom on her feed with a caption saying...

“Cant wait to see my girl after work. It’s been a long day 😫.”

If anything made Y/N smile at all today it was Tom. In some weird way its like he knew how she felt without even telling or seeing him. He was her rock after all and if there was anyone she could count on to make her smile in the least it was Tom. Just on cue, he called her right after.

“Hello darling.” He greets sleepily.

“Hey babe.” Y/N responded quietly.

“Are you okay?”

“Hmm. Oh..yeah just fine.” She lies, hoping not to worry him too much.

“Darling, I can tell you’re not. You dont sound like yourself. Ill be home soon okay? Tell me all about it?”

Y/N nodded as she whispered, “Yeah.”

“Okay..I love you so much. Ill be home soon.”

“I love you too.” She croaks.

Just like that Tom was home in record time, but not without capturing a few things to cheer his girl up. He welcomed her with freshly baked cookies from her favorite cookie shop, and nothing was better than food from her favorite Italian spot. Tom placed the food on the counter as he searched for his girl.

“Love, Im home.” He called out. “Are you okay, darling?”

Y/N popped in the hallway as she ran straight into his arms, not saying a word but holding onto him as if she would lose him.

“Hey..hey. Whats wrong?” He asked in his soothing voice.

“Lots of drama.” She mumbled. “I love you but you didnt have to go through buying all this. I could have cooked for us.”

Tom pulled away from her, giving the look confusion and disapproval. “Cooked for us while you’re clearly upset? Thats absolute bullocks. We’re gonna eat all this food because we can and then youre gonna vent everything out and then.. Im gonna hold you in my arms and coax you to sleep so you can relax and have a shoulder to cry on.”

Y/N smiled at the gesture already wraaping her arms around him, shedding a slight tear at how he would always be here for her. “I love you so much Tom.”

“I do too. Now tell me what’s wrong, darling.”

So Y/N did tell him everything from what happened with her friends and how the unecessary pile of work came up on her, and all the insecurities that have just risen out throughout the whole day. She was on his lap as they cuddled into the sofa. Showing her phone, he reads the last remaining texts from the conversation.

“I’m unfollowing y’all on everything and i am not answering another text just thought i would throw how crazy that is, out there. So at this point i’m done. forget it y’all can chill i’m out:) ”

“Wow.” He said, taking a moment to process what happened. “She really meant it, didnt she?”

Y/N nodded as she put her phone away. “Yeah and now Im just in the middle because I dont know what to do or who to support. Our whole friendship is breaking apart and I just dont want to lose any of them.” She cries silently, occaionally bring up the sleeves of Tom’s hoodie to wipe her nose and eyes.

“Hey, look its not your fault you were just trying to help. I know you guys have been friends for so long and Im sure that this is just a small bump and all four of you will get together and this will all be put past behind you.” Tom encourages as he tucks a small piece of her hair behind her ear, leans in for a comforting kiss on her forehead. “Darling, I know how much you wanted to fix things between your friends but it’s not your fault. This isnt yours to fix you just need to give it some time yeah? Even if your friends dont stick around thats on them, but just know I will always be here for you. Ill be your shoulder to cry on, and I sure as hell wont leave or unfollow you.” He chuckles at the situation, wiping away her tear stained cheeks.

“Haha how funny.” She sniffles and smiles at Tom’s corny attempt to make a joke of the situation like he always does.

“See theres that smile, Ive been waiting all day to see. I just can’t get enough of it.” Tom compliments. “That smile should stay there for good. Fuck anyone or anything that tries to take it away for you.”

“Thank you Tommy.” Y/N says sweetly, leaning in and pressing her lips against Tom’s.

Tom smiles back into the kiss gently cradling the back of her head. “Anytime darling. Now let’s see if there are other ways to make you feel better.” He winked as he carried her up to their room.

[wehatejulietsimms]

A/N: i'm gonna respond to this in sections bc it's quite long so bare with me.

Howdy y’all, 🤠 again. Yes, I didn’t in fact die. I’m sorry though that I kept getting sidetracked and couldn’t submit this until now, my boss decided to keep dumping her work into my lap. So I just wanna preface this by stating that I’m going to try and say what I want to as coherent as possible, but I have pretty severe ADHD so I’m not always as easy to understand as I think I am in my head, and I often go off on tangents, over explain things and circle back to topics randomly without realizing. Im basically going to go over their relationship over the years as I said previously (I’m not gonna go into detail about every single scandal and shitty thing Juliet did over the years, because we’d be here all year. so I figure I won’t cover them here, but rather let people ask specific questions if they want to. Remember, I was present for pretty much everything so feel free to ask.😊), but I’m also going to do kind of a mini deep dive into Andy’s behavior and actions (because although the snakes will hit you with every excuse in the book, and tell you that you’re looking too far into things and that it doesn’t matter, it does. The way a person acts in general and towards people around them is very relevant when talking about someone’s health, happiness, and well-being.) To start off, let’s take it all the way back to the time before Juliet’s reign of terror, when Andy and Scout were still together. In all honesty from what I saw of them together (and I saw pretty much everything they posted, I’m only a year younger than Andy, and I was quite into him when he was on MySpace and such, and I always watched anything with him and Scout together because they were fucking adorable lol) they had a really healthy relationship. Not once did I get weird vibes from them. The way Andy acted toward and with Scout, you could tell they really loved each other and were happy together. They had nothing to prove. It just was normal. (For any of you who are younger, or didn’t come into the picture until Andy was already post-scout and would like to see some videos of them together, you could generally search on YouTube for it, but also there’s a specific channel on there called like bring the milk tea or something that has videos of old Andy blogs and also Andy and scout on stickam and such. Worth a look if you’re curious) They weren’t constantly all over each other like possessive pack dogs *ahem Juliet ahem* and whenever Andy mentioned scout he didn’t need to shower her in compliments. They both seemed very secure in both themselves and the relationship. Super cute. Initially when they broke up it seemed quite odd. I didn’t really expect it. It got even weirder when he states that he and Juliet are together. It didn’t feel like they fit together at all (and no I’m not talking about from a fame or success perspective. At least not yet lol) As I’ve said I got bad vibes from Juliet right from the get go. Andy already seemed to be acting not like himself. (Also snakeys have argued that it’s just that he’s more mature now and that’s why he acts nervous and constantly looks Ike he wants to die. 🙄 maturity doesn’t mean losing your fucking personality and being unhappy most of the time. Jesus Christ.) it seemed like they got possessive of each other and constantly needed to show people how in love they were. Pictures, videos, and fucking public love paragraphs to show they are, in fact, in a super real relationship and they love each other. It also felt like Andy’s family was in on this whole weird charade.They (Chris honestly) started to defend her degenerate behavior and attack anyone who had even a whisper of negative things to say about her or their relationship. It was like watching a group of awkward, pretty mediocre actors put on a play about them being together. (I’ve hit the text limit now, but there will be more that I will write just after I submit this one though, fear not haha. N, you can either post this now or wait until I submit the rest, it’s up to you.) 1 / ? -🤠

A/N: i was here for a lot of it as well so i do remember some of this. although i did join the fandom shortly after him and juliet got together (i joined like around the time she was on the voice) i literally remember hoping that him and scout would get back together bc juliet just rubbed me the wrong way and i didn't know why at the time. & side note i actually do recommend people go look at old videos of andy and scout they were really adorable. there is this one video of them singing (i think a carrie underwood song lol) in the car and it's really cute. but yeah just bc he's older doesn't mean his whole entire personality changes. you can be any age and act however you want. i could even use jenna marbles & julien solomita (a youtube couple) as an example, they've been together for i think like 8 or 9 years and are about the same age as A&J (julien being around andy's age & jenna around juliet's age) & although they can have mature adult conversations and all of that, they still act like idiots and joke around together. neither of them look uncomfortable or are afraid of saying certain things like andy is around juliet. so andy aging doesn't mean shit in regards to his personality doing a 180.

🤠okay, so part two here we go. (Also I apologize if I get the chronological order of anything I talk about incorrect, I’m a bit scattered sometimes and the next ask I make will be the one where I talk about the domestic abuse and I tend to get quite heated, which only makes my brain function worse lol) so the point at which Andy was trying to get fans to go vote for/ support Juliet when she was on the voice seemed really fishy. I’m all for supporting the work of the people you love, but it’s kinda strange how hard Andy was pushing this at the time. Too hard in my opinion. I’m obviously aware that it was helpful in the end and he more or less got what he was asking for. But it was like he absolutely needed people to vote for her. As if he would get in trouble if they didn’t. So around 2012 or 2013 it felt like things really went down the shitter from there and just got progressively worse. (I never knew why for the longest time, but after they revealed that Vegas wedding that happened in about that time frame, it made a lot of sense.) Andy’s behavior began to change towards his fans. There are a lot of accounts of this happening from fans themselves and a lot of people said that 1. It was worse with Juliet around, and 2. a lot of the time it would happen towards females especially. ( I think more towards the “pretty” fans but don’t count me on that, I don’t know for sure.) This was completely night and day. Especially coming from the same man who used to always defend his fans and once stated something along the lines of he would never have a crazy or awkward fan story because he loves and is grateful for all of his fans and he won’t get upset if they’re just really excited. I would understand if these fans crossed the line in some way (like the later incident of fans finding his address and harassing them, which is unacceptable no matter who the people are) but from most if not all of the fan stories I’ve heard, they didn’t. They were being respectful and didn’t do anything to warrant this happening to them besides showing up. Which brings me to my next point, a lot of these negative experiences were caused by Juliet. Either she was the one being mean to people, she was causing Andy to be mean to people on her behalf, or her presence was upsetting Andy to the point that he was angry and started being rude and irritable. What scares me the most are the accounts of Andy having a whole Jekyll and Hyde thing, depending on weather or not Juliet was present. Happy when he’s free of her and miserable when he isn’t. In videos of him where Juliet is behind the camera he always seems nervous and strange. Like he’s afraid to mess up. That’s fucking alarming to say the least. You would think that the last thing one would want to do if another person brings them this much anger, stress, and anxiety, the LAST thing they would want to do is fucking marry them. Right? He literally started barely smiling at one point and really doesn’t anymore. I mean for Christ’s sake look at his wedding photos. What’s suppose to be one of the happiest moments of your life and to quote another anon with a different ask, he looks like he’s being dragged to the gallows. (And I get really fucking Angry honestly when snakeys tries to pass it off as “oh he’s awkward he doesn’t know how to smile” or “omg he’s being dramatic for the aesthetics” in some pictures, yes. But why the fuck would you look like that in pictures with the “love of your life” who you now regularly write cringy paragraphs publicly professing your love and complete adoration for? Andy knows how to smile genuinely. Ffs he used to. He smiled genuinely when he was a kid, he smiled genuinely with scout, and he smiled genuinely when Juliet wasn’t around. He doesn’t smile when she is there, and if he does, it is pretty much always visibly fake.) So I may backtrack a little later, but right now I want to talk about the fact that Juliet IS an abuser. More specifically, the plane incident. (Word limit. TBC.) 2 / ? -🤠

A/N: yes. 100%. when it comes to the wedding photos i will never understand people (specifically snakeys) writing off his behavior as him "just being dramatic for the aesthetics". is that something he would do in photoshoots? yeah. is it something he may do on stage? sure. something he would do in an interview? maybe. but candid shots of him on one of the "happiest days of his life"? wtf no. & idk why people think that.

🤠 Just before I start, again, with the pictures, I really don’t think that Andy is enough of a self absorbed egotistical dick that he would actually sit there and put on the whole “miserable tough guy” act in every fucking photo he takes. Ah yes, the infamous plane incident. So straight up, Juliet exposed herself as an abuser, and brought out every bullshit excuse in the book (and made Andy go along with them) to try to cover it up. 1. She was drunk. Honestly this is total bullshit. I say this same thing when people defend cheating or any other degenerate behavior with the excuse of intoxication and I will say it now. Being drunk does not make you a different fucking person. It does not change the thoughts in your head. What it does do is impair your ability to make decisions and judgement skills in general. It’s the same reason why people drive drunk. It’s routine. Its what they would normally do. And because they’re drunk, they can’t see any reason why they shouldn’t do that. Juliet gets drunk, she and Andy fight, she wants to hit him, and because she’s drunk she doesn’t think that she shouldn’t fucking put her hands on him. 2. She hit him in “self defense” and he broke her ribs.(There’s several points I have debunking this) first of all let’s get this out of the way, no one on that plane (including the very real witness who just so happened to be an adult film actress (I think?) who you so love to discount because of it) saw him strike her or even touch her at any time. Two, you are in fucking airplane seats sitting right the fuck next to each other with an armrest in between. It would be pretty fucking hard to break your ribs unless they were made of actual glass, or Andy’s real name is Bruce fucking banner. Bones are surprisingly strong and I’m going to go out on a limb here and say that it’d be damn near impossible for him to do that to you, which brings me to three, if he had broken your ribs you would not be fucking standing up, thrashing around, whining like a little bitch, and oh by the way, continuing to abuse your husband for the second time on that flight. Four, you had a miscarriage. (When I was trying to conceive with my husband it was very difficult. I had two miscarriages before I finally had my son. I’m fully aware of how devastating having one is.) which is why if you are not lying (which I fully believe that Juliet would stoop that low just to get sympathy, especially with this big of a scandal. But I don’t actually have proof of this so I will say that it is just speculation on my part) I don’t fucking care. I am not unsympathetic to her if this did actually happen as I said, however, You do not get to make any excuse for putting your hands on another person out of anger. Ever. I don’t care who you are, I don’t care what kind of stress you are under, I don’t care if you are inebriated in any way and I sure as hell don’t care what the fuck you have between your legs. You do not hurt anyone. Point blank period. Five. You are a woman, you can’t hurt him. This one, actually enrages me. We all know your crusty ass pulled this one out (and threw around trump supporters a few times for good measure) because you know damn well how society and the media views and deals with abusive women. Women can abuse. Women who are shorter or weaker than their target can abuse. The fact that there are people who either don’t know that or don’t agree with that is absolutely baffling. Six. The same (I believe) porn actress. Literally saw you beating your own face with the restraints you had to be put in (which by the way flight attendants only ever use restraints as an absolute last resort when someone becomes a danger to the others on board, so she had to be acting absolutely deranged) to give yourself a bloody nose to claim Andy hit you. Then you proceed to act like a child and tell Andy to call your fucking dad. (Which kinda proves that whole Scientology thing honestly) what in the hell. I stg as long as I am breathing I will never let this go. This is actual fucking domestic abuse. (Word limit TBC.) 3 / ? -🤠

A/N: yeah her hitting him "bc she was drunk" was never a good excuse not only for the reasons you mentioned but, also bc let's be real at no point are you ever going to get served enough alcohol on a plane to make you that drunk i don't care what anyone says. also when it comes to the excuse of him "breaking her ribs" does she forget that andy actually did break his ribs a while ago? i think she even visited him when he was recovering so she should know what kind of pain he was in. & if he actually broke her ribs, there's no way she would have even been able to stand bc i know andy sure wasn't able to. he said it was one of the most painful things he's experienced. (i don't think i need to comment on the rest of this. it would just be redundant. you hit the nail on the head with that.)

🤠 I don’t care if it happened just that one time ore more likely is an everyday occurrence. Abuse is abuse and should never be tolerated. Kind of getting away from the plane thing. Andy always seems, as it’s been said on here before, afraid to mess up. Like he might mess up, and make her mad. A common behavioral pattern in abuse victims. He also at this point and for a decent amount of time before, doesn’t seem like he loves her anymore. Like he keeps up appearances and pretends, but it’s like it’s a job he’s forced to do. He’s tired and burnt out but was probably manipulated into staying and juliet is probably clinging for dear life. Also I don’t know if I’m the only one who thinks this, but I swear, the veganism and sobering up was just a cover up, most likely formed by either Juliet herself or her fucked up family, after the plane incident to hide their tracks and regain some public favor (because you know, if you advocate for animal rights then you can’t abuse your husband 🙃) Andy never gave a shit before though. Even though it was unhealthy he loved to drink and smoke and was very outspoken about that. And he used to never give a fuck about eating meat or consuming animal products like leather. I mean they’re still selling leather goods ffs. I would get having minor fuck ups because you don’t know any better, but it’s fucking leather. And now Andy is unhealthy and miserable as ever, but the culprit is malnourishment and Juliet rather than cigs, alcohol, and Juliet. My final thoughts: I do definitely believe in the Scientology theory, but if not that than I definitely believe that Andy was and is being manipulated for his fame. On several occasions it really looked like they broke up, including the time when they did, and then said it was a joke. It really doesn’t feel normal. Also, Juliet doesn’t really care about Andy that much. She never wears her wedding ring, she sells all their shit, including sentimental items, and now that she’s gained more popularity from being with him, suddenly doesn’t want to put him in her bio or write him the same creepy ass paragraphs or anything. It’s fucked up how shes so keen to say she did it all herself when really she’s been riding dick for fame since before she even met Andy. It also always kinda seemed to me that Amy was kind of uncomfortable around Juliet. We all know that Chris loves to kiss her ass night and day (most likely to do with the Scientology thing “if” it’s true), but Juliet and Amy always seemed to have a weird relationship like it was tense and forced. Also I just want to mention the time that Juliet talked about screaming at the woman over what I believe was a game night and brushed it off as being competitive and no one gave damn. Fucked up. To finish off this already way too long little series, I think Andy is a very vulnerable insecure person who got manipulated by several people (not just Juliet) some of whom he probably really trusted, and they helped to get him in Juliet’s (equally if not more insecure) hands so she could hurt him as she pleases. I truly hope that even now both he, and his parents (even though Chris really grinds my gears) can get out of this whole shit show, relatively unscathed. I know this is probably pretty unlikely, but hope springs eternal I guess. As I said feel free to ask any questions you may have and I will try to answer them best I can. Thank you for reading. 4 / 4 -🤠

A/N: yet again you hit the nail on the head with this part so i don't need to comment too much. other than the fact that i do agree that juliet and amy's relationship does seem weird.

[tigerdrop]

dogboy gordon rutting against benreys leg in the same way that benrey did it in the reverse. benrey encouraging him and also making fun of him in the same breath. yummy brain thoughts. i am rotating this

jesus christ i started thinking about dogboy gordon and have not stopped thinking. theres 7k words of dogboy stuff under here im going insane

how in the. help. Help. dog boy. how does he become dogboy. i cant keep giving these idiots potions but i guess thats what ive been reduced to

gman turns him into a dog boy. walks thru a portal and comes out in nintendogs but hes the dog and when he comes back out again hes still a little bit dogy. this is fucking stupid

THE TAIL WAGGING im going to pass away

> i think he would have such fucking issues with the fact that his tail and ears are expressing his emotions so much

trying to act angry towards benrey but hes given away by his tail wagging like crazy......and he never even knows its happening until somebody points it out

it would be cool if. um. he got a little more into roughhousing and rough play afterward. you know. like a . hes already really handsy......physical. . .. .

> okay like the anger turning into somewhat-serious jostling and pushing which turns into roughhousing

its not even horny at first it just gives him the weirdest fucking endorphins. like. its fucking fun man

> and by the time theyre roughhousing his tail is wagging furiously and like thumping on the floor when he gets pinned haha

> YES its about the exhilaration ......he gets this rush from flipping benrey over after he's pinning him, baring his teeth triumphantly

benrey pinning him by his wrists and half-laughing at him like "what the fuck is wrong with you??" and the rest of the science team chimes in like YEAH WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU GUYS WHAT WAS THAT

> gordon comes back to himself and turns red immediately and splutters like "i dont know! what - im just - benrey started it!” so like he refuses to do it again but then benrey pushes his buttons and he gets in his face, ears pinned back a bit and shoves him and benreys like oh...so its this again huh...

GOD......PUSHING HIS BUTTONS.......its sooo much fun now that gordons so physically reactive too

> what if he manages to get an honest to god growl out of gordon at one point and it makes something ugly twist in benrey's gut and he wants to make it happen again

and its probably really gratifying for him to see just how often gordons tail wags when gordon looks at him or snorts at one of his jokes

TWO SIDES

> the duality of their relationship....gordons tail wagging just a bit when hes looking at benrey though im

> im thinking about the growling though like...benrey gets fixated on how he fucking sounds, all deep and rumbly and this intensity just focused on benrey only....makes him think about how that would look in other contexts....

> benrey riling him up while their roughousing so he can feel that growl travel through his chest and like...getting gordon to that point makes him SO determined to win the "fight" over benrey hes almost a bit out of his mind with it......pins benrey and subconsciously ruts against him a bit as a sign of dominance....please stop me now goodbye....

NO LITERALLY THATS WHAT I WAS THINKING ABOUT THE MOMENT I STARTED TYPING

prodding gordon further and further and riling him up until gordon pins him to the floor, hard, an arm jammed behind his back and his HEV suit jammed up against benreys ass and rutting subconsciously as gordon. h. gordon. clamps down on the back of his neck and growls

benrey sucks in a rattling gasp and is like "what? ow" in a weirdly shocked yet distanced way

he cant feel where gordons hard b/c of the HEV suit but he can feel the metal awkwardly bumping against his ass Like That. and inwardly benreys on a loop of "what the fuck what the fuck" but not in a bad way in the slightest. just utterly cannot believe this is whats happening, right now, gordon freeman dry humping his ass behind a bunch of crates, not 100 feet from the rest of the science team

> gordon snapping out of it and being like...what the fuck am i doing... or....maybe the gasp makes gordon bite down harder in response...not sure

> gordon not even realizing hes doing it until that moment is so great....i dont know but....maybe he lets go and pushes off benrey, panting and wild eyed, and the image of benrey on his stomach, his bite mark in his neck, is burned into his brain

> he just doesnt say fucking anything and just dips to get jacked off by the suit maybe.... cant stop thinking about how it felt to see benrey with his teeth marks....hates himself for feeling that sick satisfaction in his chest

benrey......touching the back of his neck afterwrds, kind of dream-like, both consciously and subconsciously.......

i like making gordon freeman suffer so i want him to just angrily try to rut against his arm in private later trying desperately to get off thru this stupid busted HEV suit that he cant get out of. pathetic. gordon freeman humping his own fucking arm in a bathroom stall. like a dog

and he thinks about how benrey smelled when he had his teeth clamped on the back of benreys neck, his nose buried right against benreys jaw and neck, smelling the sweat and the hormones and feeling benreys rapid heartbeat, and his whole fucking head throbs with how bad he wants to get off

> and he just cant get off....has to deal with going back the team tense and a bit sweaty and just move on when they ask what happened. benrey doesnt say anything just stares at him and gordon cant meet his eyes. gordon tries not to fucking let benrey get under his skin cause i think hes probably mad upset and embarassed that he reverted to his like,,,more base instincts because of BENREY of all people.....

> but he still thinks about it sometimes and....he tries to distance himself from him but hes still a pretty touchy guy and he find himself around benrey still....laughing at his jokes and getting in his space once in a while. always pulls himself away when he notices but not before he takes in a deep breath of benrey's scent...

> meanwhile benreys trying to think of how to make gordon do that shit again LOL

ohmy god. oh my god.....before this.....before he tries to stop getting in benreys business and before he even recognizes what hes doing.......he like.....hes so touchy feely that he subconsciously tries to mark benrey a lot. like just doing everything in his power to rub the inside of his wrists somewhere on him. even if its barely gonna do anything b/c of the suit. its just instinct

> NOW HE ...now he realizes that he was doing that the whole time..jesus,...

> AUGH....in the buildup before this he didnt realize that he was doing it........but now he realizes he fucking misses doing that shit and kind of berates himself for doing it in the first place....like what the fuck....be Normal gordon...you cant want to fuck him....do you..?

i want him to. grrgohg i dont even know how or why this would happen but i want gordon freeman to lie supine on the ground with his hands up like paws like hes a big pupy looking for tummy rubs OKAY! BYE. I HAVE TO GO. im going to fucking sob why am i like this why is this the cutest possible thing for a man to do. i cant even think of a fucking reason why he would do this so im so fucking embarrassed

i want to fucking. i want to rub his fucking tumy and make him pop a boner from it im literally so sick of this earth

> i was literally Just typing: i just think it would be cool . To pet his tummy and keep telling him "good boy" in a Certain kind of Tone that just totally fucks him up about it . maybe flushed and tongue starting to wanna hang out of his mouth as he goes from laying flat on his back to kinda twisted to one side, breathing heavy, tail thumping hard against the floor cause hes a big dog so that thing is like a lethal weapon

> petting the fuzzy lower belly while hes already hard & needy just to make him whine Very high pitched and desperate-sounding bc its so close to what he wants but that just makes it worse 8)

> What if. Benrey pinning Gordon, maybe scritches behind his ear, as a "joke", he's a dog haha good boy wants ear scritches?? And Gordon immediately squirming and whining. Maybe even kicking his leg just a little bit

> i think it would be cool for a post-black mesa puby gordon pinned benrey to the floor with his whole body weight and humped the life out of benrey's leg while panting and drooling in benrey's ear. a total lack of regard for benrey, (of course he's into it tho) just using him like an object that's conveniently there for him to furiously get off on

> i'm thinking.... this happening after a period of prolonged teasing, like you said. rubbing his tummy and ignoring his dick

> Man ok combined with the suit edging huh? I love that, but i also kinda want gordon to sneak off to get off and discover his uh. k. kn. knot

> he sneaks off and if in this situation he can.  idk. get at his dick in a bathroom or whatever. and well, he gets caught up so easily in his 'head empty' instincts mode that when he cums he's kneading that thang for like 2 minutes before he even becomes cognizant enough to notice. and then immediately panic. so idk maybe he cant get at himself for a while, right, so he didnt notice this

> i just think gordon being in the suit would not let him get at his dick and he would only be able to get off in really convoluted ways so like...he wouldnt fucking Know he had a knot he would just feel a weird pressure at the base that he doesnt know what its about. but he starts getting these fantasies of holding benrey down and staying in him when he comes and he doesnt know where the hell thats coming from.....yet. until after everything is over and he can get out of it, and the first time he jacks off again he realizes HOLY FUCK? like what the hell....but it makes sense in retrospect where those fantasies came from. but hes just super embarassed about those fantasies and pushes them down until benrey comes back into his life and activates him again

> in addition to embarassment i think he has a lot of complicated feelings about benrey and definitely feels a guilty about wanting to fuck him into the ground and fill him with cum....but GOD if benrey doesnt get to him just as much as he did in black mesa

> i think that something like this would be so unplanned and shit but like......theyve probably hung out a few times before this or more like maybe benrey has dropped into his house just to annoy him and gordon finds his ears pricking when he hears heavy footsteps around his house cause he recognizes them as benrey's...

> little rush of exhilaration maybe. cause it means they'll spend some time together and he has just all these emotions under his skin when they do. i dont know how this would happen but maybe gordon forgets to keep himself in check when benrey makes him laugh so hard he's snorting and his tail is wagging furiously.benrey tries to touch/catch his tail cause he's kinda curious about it and it never got to mess with it in black mesa. but it turns into roughhousing as gordon shoves him away a little bit but benrey keeps trying to get at it and then get at his ears

> "cmon man just let me touch them whats the big deal-" "NO!" but like hes still laughing a bit until they start really getting into it and he gets breathless and a little irritated at having to roll around and try to pin benrey's hands to the floor

hell on earth......the way his tails wagging and hes grinning and drooling a little once he gets benrey pinned.......

> little triumphant smile when he finally does.....got benrey on his stomach and he's subconsciously rutting against benrey's ass like in black mesa but hes just not noticing while he's berating benrey for losing

> talking right into his ear, and benrey lets out a little gasp when he does a particularly hard thrust and then hes like oh. fuck. he takes in a deep breath and can smell benrey's sweat and realizes hes just as horny about this as he is. cant help but bury his face in the back of his neck and lick. and benrey starts pushing back into him and talking the worst dirty talk and it makes him growl right against his neck and put his teeth there again as a warning not to move but benrey doesnt still, he just keeps talking. so gordon bites down, hard, cutting him off mid sentence with a yelp

f. fucking. benrey......arching his back into it.......pressing his hips up as high as theyll go......the angles bro.....the angles

> also: gordon popping boners more easily, even when he's just platonically excited w/ benrey..... yeah... :)

> like the thing about this is just that he got so excited from the wrasslin that he popped a boner....wasnt even thinking of horny.....

> not until benrey started gasping and arching back into him. then hes immediately aware of how this looks...like hes already basically in the position in his fantasies hes just rutting against him in the imitation of fucking

> gordon getting more frenzied by the little sounds benrey is making as he clamps down on his neck, drool dripping down his chin. benrey braces himself with one hand and gets the other to pull his pants down and then tug on the leg of gordon's down a bit because gordon is kind of. not thinking straight right now. gordon gets the message and fumbles with the buttons to get it down and like. haha i thinnk it would be fun if benrey prepped himself before this and gordon notices like. you really managed to prep urself this time? god, you really wanted this to happen. but maybe benrey had been doing it the last few times cause gordon would get in his space again sometimes and things were tense

NO GOD THIS IS GOOD. LIKE. oh my god gordon just like bitching at him and getting up in his face and Growling a couple times before while his pants are all tented from the inadvertent excitement boners that he doesnt even realize hes having.....and benrey might not be smart but hes not stupid

theres like a 50% chance theyre gonna fuck at any given time he realizes so like. why not......

even if it doesnt work out in the moment benrey still spends the whole time hopped up on the knowledge that they could have, that he was the little fucking pervert who got himself all prepped just in case gordon decided todays the day hes just gonna mount him, and honestly the way he beats his meat and fucks himself afterwards might be nearly as good as the real deal, just from that little bit of self-inflicted degradation

like u said...........he really wanted it to happen

> hhh.... maybe gordon ruts a bit against his ass and benrey guides him in and. he makes a deep growling rumble when he bottoms out. benrey feels it through his chest and gets a full body shiver as he's filled. i dont think hes fully developed his knot yet but its a tight fit. he starts fucking hard and fast into him while open mouthed panting, he cant keep his face away from the benrey's neck, licking up the sweat and burying his face there to breathe in his scent

the fucking . the desperation......every instinct in his body has been telling him to fuck benrey - yes, that benrey, fucking benrey - into the ground for......weeks now? months??

dudes probably tried everything he can think of to overcome it and to think about literally anything else when he gets off but nobody he fucks even comes close to smelling as good as benrey did when gordon had him pinned and gasping and sweating and he could smell the want rolling off him in waves.....and it sucks massive dick and he hates it

> hes been driven crazy by this thought for so long.....cant fucking control himself. wh. what if gordon managed to get a hold of a piece of benrey's clothes that he left and held it up to his face when he let himself jack off to this particular thought so he could get the scent but it jsut wasnt the same without his warm, panting body below him . he always nuts the hardest when he has it though

huffing benreys undershirt and desperately rutting into a pillow on his hands and knees with his ass fully up and hes just utterly debased right now

sad and pathetic gordon freeman humping his pillow like a dog and whining thinking about fucking benrey. if his past self could see himself like this right now he would be disgusted

> !!!!!!!!1 HIM GETTING INTO THE MOUNTING POSITION ON INSTINCT WHEN HE DOES IT...YOUR BRAIN ! i think that gordon would definitely give everything hes got to benrey when he finally gets to fuck him.

> now that hes actually doing it he's just out of his goddamn mind. benrey already being ready for him, slick and hot, just letting him push in .....i think he would definitely go insane

dudes never fucked so hard or so mindlessly in his life......for once all the neuroses just fly out the window. overcome by instinct

> letting out all these whines and moans, not even caring for how loud hes being... benrey's wanted this so fucking bad hes just eating it up, pushing back on him like an animal and getting a power trip that he made gordon this unhinged

thinking about him just being utterly shocked when benrey guides him in and he can just bury himself all the way to the hilt so easily and it makes something in his brain snap

> gordon doesnt even tell benrey when hes close, benrey can just start to feel his knot swell inside him and how it stretches him a bit past what he prepared for...but he wants it in him so fucking bad, he just lets gordon keep fucking into him

like. oh my god. does benrey even know about the knot or is this a brand new and fun surprise for him

> I DONT KNOW......I JUST REALLY LIKE THE THOUGHT OF HIM BEING A BIT CAUGHT OFF GUARD BY IT....

> being caught off guard by it but being so turned on by the feeling of it filling him that he lets out this really high, needy sound. which goes straight to gordon's dick and he just pushes into him harder and jolts his whole body with it. maybe he h....he bites down on the other side of his neck again and thrusts in one more time before coming deep in him. just shuddering from it, eyes squeezed shut and jaw locked around benrey

benrey just fuckin. face down ass up and arching his back as high as he can

(mumbling very quietly) it might be cool also if. gordon maybe.....started growling some things as he got close. a certain something. a word

you know......just......bent over benreys back......arms wrapped around benreys chest and fingers digging into the soft flesh (maybe even his titties, if youre feeling spicy).......pistoning his hips in staccato bursts while he growls.........u bh hhhhh......"mine". over and over not even realizing hes doing it b/c his brain is so fogged out on the sheer delight of rawing benrey after having thought about it non-stop

(mumbling so quietly im speaking at a pitch below the human hearing threshold) benrey hoarsely saying "'m yours, 'm yours" while hes got one hand jammed underneath himself to tug at his dick is the thing that sets gordon off and makes him come, perhaps. perhaps

and gordon just.....slumps over him, leaning his full body weight on him, panting weakly into his ear while his hips subconsciously rut just a little bit, arms still wrapped around benrey but otherwise as useless as a bump on a log while benreys jerking himself off to the wild new feeling of having that knot stretch him open and tug at him every time gordon shifts his hips

gordon nuts and becomes utterly useless but at least his knots still fat as hell so benreys still got something to work with

(sobbing) i just want to see men acting like animals leave me olone..... its about the submission to instinct......the degradation and dehumanization......and also the scent kink its all about the fucking scent kink. its about wanting to huff a guy you pretend you hate like hes a fucking magic marker and its about wanting to make him smell like u

> for scent kink, Gordon's boners due to sweaty benrey hehehehe. this is narsty -> Benrey is like "yeesh that was a lot of exertion" after their first almost-sex wrasslin match, and gets embarassed, so next time he like, wears a bunch of old spice.... but gordon doesn't get as excited. like yeah he can feel him against his back and yeah he's not soft but.. he's not panting or as hard. benrey thinks real hard when he gets home

> CLEAN SWEAT OK ITS A COMBATIBILITY THING OK. IT IS. LOOK UP THE SCIENCE OK I ...walks away. clown shoez

YOU ARE SO FUCKING CORRECT THANK U

> Maybe next time He doesn't bother with the old spice at all, and he gets real into the wrasslin... hell maybe he even uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh gets gordon's head under his arm im just saying

I DIDNT WANNA BE THE ONE TO SAY IT BUT NO YEAH THATS COOL. ITS A VERY COOL THOUGHT

think about......dogboy gordon roughhousing and getting pinned down himself and snapping his teeth up at benrey like joking but not joking. you know

they both start just getting really into roughhousing b/c sometimes gordons brain gets Stressed The Fuck Out by all the added stimulation to the senses of being pupy......theres too many sounds and smells sometimes and it makes him even more neurotic and makes him start acting up and getting irritable and trying to start shit until he exerts himself enough to tire his brain out and make it shut up

maybe even like.....in the interim after black mesa but before he runs into benrey again, gordon becomes a fucking hot mess b/c he doesnt know how to deal with it all and the only way he got thru black mesa without his brainstem snapping in half was b/c he and benrey would start shit and start fighting and wrestling and the rest of the science team eventually shrugged and accepted this as a (very weird) part of their life now. he looks like hes one minor inconvenience away from a panic attack and its so sad

any kind of physical exercise would help (he takes up jogging when hes feeling stressed out, which is a lot, and hes gotten some really nice legs by this point) but theres just something different about the roughhousing. its a mental exercise as well as a physical one, so it exhausts his brain more, and unbeknownst to him, he just gets fucking endorphins from the way benrey smells and from being able to mark him with all the up-close physical contact theyre getting. so. hence the wrestling and roughhousing and gordons occasional tendency to just pounce the guy in public and start fighting him with his tail wagging and thumping like crazy

it might be even better if gordon attempts to roughhouse with just about the whole science crew at some point, just for a point of comparison

like.....its usually good, its satisfying, and it wears him out and lets him function like a human being......but theres just something about roughhousing with benrey thats really satisfying and he doesnt have the emotional intelligence to figure out what it is

gordon freeman is an idiot, is what im saying

> tommy indulges him and probably lets him win a few times, coomer soundly wins out every time and bubby probably...loses some before getting pissy LOL. i think that its fun for him to get the most Good Feelings out of roughhousing with benrey.....

AUUUUGHHH WHAT IF HE LICKED BENREYS FACE THO

g gbfbhhh god im obsessed with the way benrey laughs at him and asks "what the fuck is wrong  with you?" in the act 3 commentary and thats the exact kind of vibe im feeling from him about like. everything gordon does in pupymode

> Okay, before I go to bed, I shall leave you with a Dog Thought™. Gordon probably wouldn’t be the “best trained” dog in the world because, well, he doesn’t have anyone to make him listen or obey. Heck, given his need to be in control, he probably thinks he’s the leader of the proverbial pack and nobody can tell him what to do. He’d probably slip and do quite a few “rude” and obnoxious dog things, including but not limited to being all over Benrey.

> Trying to goad him into roughhousing. Licking his face. Being in his space to the point that it even starts to make Benrey raise an eyebrow. Inappropriate marking and whatnot. [cough] And what if Benrey--in a weird reversal of the roles we usually give--is stuck with the task of… training Gordon… to behave…

> YOU KNOOOOW. Because pitting alpha dog Gordon against Benrey, who is trying to get him to be “good”...

> … Well, that could be interesting.

> Imagine if you will: Benrey realizing he needs to get Gordon under control. As much as he likes the attention, it's becoming too much. Relentless. Tables have been turned and now he's the one that's a little overwhelmed by the situation because, well, Gordon is running on pure instinct half the time. Making it hard to do things. Making it hard to live his life. Always in his bubble which was, like, fine at first but now he can't do anything without feeling a wet tongue on his face or having Gordon trying to goad him into rough housing.

> He needs so much attention. Has so much energy. It's too much.

> So, he decides he's going to try to "train" Gordon to not... do that. Benrey trying to assert dominance over Gordon, as if he were just a normal dog. Gordon, who has already marked Benrey and decided that Benrey belongs to him does not take to this very well. This is not how the chain of command works. This isn't how the chain of command works at all.

> Benrey, struggling to curb him through praise and admonitions--"good boy," "bad boy," tossing him ~treats~ if he does something right--is now facing off with Gordon, who is both enamored with the attention he's getting but utterly pissed off by the fact Benrey is trying to stop him from doing what he wants.

losing it at the tables being turned and now gordons the annoying fucker getting up in benreys business all the time and never leaving him alone. he deserves this

> They're basically both unmovable objects and unstoppable forces. Benrey is stubborn and isn't going to give up all his sweet PS3 time because Gordon won't stop humping his leg, and Gordon is not going to give up his God given right to make Benrey his property. But Benrey isn't completely averse to the idea of being Gordon's bitch. He just wants to be his bitch on his own terms.

> So, in a surprising show of... well, intelligence on Benrey's behalf, he starts redirecting Gordon's energy towards what HE wants Gordon to do.

> That's how you handle misbehaving dogs anyway. You redirect their energy. That's what all the books on dog training says anyway, and Benrey's inclined to believe it because he's read it in all two books on the subject he casually flipped through.

> So, when Gordon starts getting in his space, he starts redirecting him to touch where he wants touched. "Good boy." When Gordon starts getting a little rough, he purposefully positions himself so he gets the most out of it. "Good boy." When Gordon's licking his face, he starts trying to guide that tongue down to his neck. Feels better there. "Good boy."

> Because he's not a complete idiot. Him and Gordon both know this is sexually charged at this point. And Gordon... Gordon can bend his behaviors a little bit as he's being directed if he still gets to do what he wants (in a way), and Benrey still gets to be fondled by the nerd.

> "But part of the problem is that he is in Benrey's space all the time!" Yeah, but Benrey figured that out, too. You know what shuts up Gordon real fast? Pushing him back down on the other end of the couch and telling him to stay. And if he listens, he slowly, carefully hand feeds Gordon a treat as a reward. Pushing it into his mouth, making sure it goes all the way in. Letting Gordon lick the last bits of taste off of his fingers. He usually sits still after that. "Good boy."

i have a thought thats almost unrelated but im so desperate to give this scenario the proper context

thinking about......gordon getting out of black mesa and hes still dogboy.....and hes attempting to go back to life as normal now that benreys out of his hair for ever but one day his pupy nose catches That Fucking Smell on the air and he realizes that benreys not fucking dead. he thought benrey was fucking dead, b/c he killed him

gordon freeman losing his mind for a solid week or two trying to hunt that smell down (why?? to prove a point?? to try to kill benrey again??? uh huh.) and then when he does hunt benrey down, its like.....well, what was the plan, bud? you found him, and now youre having a staredown outside a 7/11 while benreys frozen halfway through his big gulp

i literally forgot what i was typing b/c dogy gordon tum y rub b gtfhgbb ggfabgbbg

and.....well......he doesnt know exactly what his game plan was, but he does know that benrey cant be trusted as far as u can throw him, and hes not about to let benrey wreak havoc on new mexico if he can help it, so now his new hobby is......tracking benrey across the city to keep an eye on him

and thats how they keep ending up in close proximity

and thats how u start looping in the whole role reversal thing.....suddenly gordons the one that benrey cant shake......hes a bloodhound and hes got the scent

SORRY im SORRY i crave context with the same ferocity that i crave, like, air

and then they start roughhousing when gordon tackles him to the ground one day to stop him from doing.....something......and gordon snaps being to being a normal person so quickly afterwards that its dizzying. turns out a solid 80% of what he really wanted was a sparring buddy

> good afternoon everyone this is not horny in the slightest but i just wanted to say- you know that thing dogs do where they get REALLY excited and playful when you come home from a long day at work? well i’m just thinking about. y’know how benrey has a tendency to just, vanish for a while and come back like nothing happened? think it’d be cute if he were gone for a particularly long stretch of time b4 catching up with the science team again and gordon RESPONDS in his typical annoyed, bratty fashion while his body language is saying something completely different (he still hasn’t mastered the art of puby)

> like, u know, tail wagging a hundred miles a minute, ears perked up and attentive, subconsciously getting all up in benrey’s space

Im going to Cry thats so fucking cute wtf wtf  wt ff

still going insane thinking about the “good boy” thing......like...... its all fun and games until hes grappling his best friend benrey and hes got benrey in a headlock and hes plastered against benreys back from head to toe and his tails thumping excitedly against the floor and hes panting hot and harsh right against benreys ear and benrey takes that moment, right there, to choke out "good boy"

its half outright horny and half power play b/c benreys banking that either theyre gonna fuck or gordons gonna let go and be like "what the fuck, man" and then benrey can get the drop on him again

the way gordon just goes stiff after he says it.....breath getting shaky.....dick twitching once against benreys ass and the guy can fucking feel it clear as day......Augh

his tail slows.....and then fires right back up again when he tentatively rocks his hips against benreys ass and feels the sound benrey makes more than he hears it......and like for fucks sake theyve been dancing around how horny their roughhousing sessions are for weeks, this guy deserves to finally get his rocks off by dry humping benreys ass while benreys getting spots in his vision from how tightly gordons got his arm wrapped around his neck. he deserves this

gordons free hand slowly opening up and pressing flat against benreys shirt, then crawling under it so that he can feel the bare skin of his stomach......rocking his hips against the dip between benreys cheeks and whimpering when benrey says it again, breathless and hoarse. "good boy." his tongue poking out to lick a broad, wet stripe up the side of benreys neck to taste the salt and sweat and the hormones, jesus christ, hes never been able to taste if somebodys horny before but its rolling off of him in waves.......and gordons breath comes out so loud and harsh and desperate when benreys leg lifts up a little bit for him to slot his own between them more easily

just mumbling stupid horny shit like "fuck benrey, you taste so good" while his tongue lolls out of his mouth and he licks the curve of benreys ear and rolls benrey onto his stomach b/c something in the back of his brain is whispering to him that it would be a really, really good idea, and hes originally got benrey just crushed flat against the floor with his full body weight but benrey takes a rattling breath and tells him to ease up, get up offa him.....

and gordons confused at this point b/c he was pretty sure this was where this was going, he was being a good boy, but that thought doesnt last very long b/c benreys shuffling into position under him, raising his hips and pushing gordons up with him while his face and torso are flat against the floor, and, Oh. hes. hes doing that. this is what theyre fucking doing now

> gordon taking the collar of benrey’s shirt in his mouth in an crude imitation of scruffing him

every fucking bone in gordons body is telling him to move his hips, fuck benrey stupid, bury himself to the hilt, but he cant do that when theyre both still clothed so he does the next best thing and ruts against benrey like he fucking means it and like if he just tries hard enough, gets enough friction, itll be just like fucking him for real......

hes so dizzied by looping thoughts of he wants this, he wants you to mount him, like youre a filthy fucking animal, arent you? you sick fuck, you wanna mark him and breed him and hed let you, hed beg you for it, look, hes doing it right now and when he comes back down to earth, yeah, benrey is begging right now, isnt he. while hes palming at the front of his sweatpants and whimpering and calling gordon a good boy, attempting to tug his pants down to his knees so gordon can rut against bare flesh, and gordon slows down just enough to let him do it and to fumble open his own zipper to ease some of the agonizing pressure

gordon fumbling his dick out of his underwear to line it up between benreys fat cheeks and god, the feeling of skin against skin is so much fucking better than chafing against his jeans that it makes him growl against benreys neck and benrey cant pump his fucking dick fast enough. hes so encouraging, what with all those little sounds hes making and the way hes arching his back and pressing his hips up as high as theyll go, groaning into the crook of his arm "fuckin, fuck me, bro, j-just like that"

> thinking...... they both get so lost in it, they both can’t hold back long enough to fuck for real. this is too hot, benrey feels something hot and wet on his ass and gordon is curling into him. benrey’s never felt so simultaneous turned on and frustrated that he’s still empty, he’s still gonna have to wait, snd ironically that denial pushes him over too

GOD yes fuckin. coming on his ass b/c gordons so frantic and desperate that he cant wait...... but seeing his cum all over benreys ass is deeply satisfying in its own way. he smears it deep into benreys skin to mark him like that

> oh hey imma be nasty sorry but Gordon all cum-high just sort of manouvering Benrey until he can start licking his cock clean bc he likes to uh. i mean benrey's all wet and you know. he likes it. and benrey comes from that, before he can even think about sucking him off properly

> he doesnt have a thought left in his head at the moment... and can u blame him? so he just uh follows he nose.......  and benrey's brain is deleted except for "GORDON FREEMAN ON MY DICK????????" bouncing around like a screensaver yes

> yeah he's not even trying to suck him off really, hes not gotten that far yet cuz hes so cumbrained, gone stupid, etc

im gonna be gross here too okay......and like. fucking. huffing and burying his nose into the crook of benreys thighs b/c he smells so intensely like sex and sweat and it makes gordon lightheaded

> YEAAH maybe he starts licking there before he gets up to his dick. it's not like he's dragging it out really so it's not long but benrey's gaping like a fish. he's trying to say something sorta but he can't get any words out and isn't even sure what he himself is trying to say

maybe he cant help himself and he just starts licking and biting on impulse b/c its your resident fuckin thigh guy here and i think benrey deserves to get em chomped like a drumstick

> and then that's gordon's tongue on his dick, bro and this neurotic mf looking so pleased and blissed out as he sloppily licks him all over is a sight he couldn't have even cooked up in his imagination before now

> benrey not coherently enough to warn him he’s like right there, his babbling incoherently at the tease of gordon’s nose and lips is gonna make him- and then his Tounge darts out and it’s over, the start of the end and he’s spurting all over gordon’s completely surprised face without even being jerked or licked through it

> maybe since gordon's been so stressed and keyed up for so long that benrey coming is a surprise but still doesn't shock him enough to clear the cumbrain, so he licks ben clean after that too, while he's twitching and whimpering etc

> think that benrey massive meat being useless and barely even touched is hip and rad even in the context of him technically being in the higher position of power

> then rests his head on beny's belly for a while, feeling very accomplished and tired. he'll panic later, don't worry

god im still thinking about. pillow humping/voyeurism

gordon freemans a bad fucking dog and sometimes he cant help himself and just starts rutting into a pillow with his ass up and his face buried in one of benreys undershirts while hes just panting and mumbling shit the whole time about benrey, benrey, benrey, why is he so fucking obsessed with benrey and with thinking about mounting him just like hes doing to his poor abused pillow every week

and. you know. maybe one day......benrey kind of.....catches him in the act. i think that would be cool. just coming home one day and cracking open his bedroom door and seeing gordon freeman on all fours, his teeth sunk deep into one pillow and another pillow between his thighs, desperately fucking it while hes groaning benreys name b/c he sure as shit was not expecting him back that early, which is why his cumbrain made him feel confident enough to crawl into benreys bed and roll around in it and mainline benreys scent from his clothes and nut on his pillow (and then feel fucking bad about it and frantically try to clean it off)

and benrey just slooowly steps back with his heart pounding out of his chest for possibly the first time in his whole life b/c he did not think gordon freeman ever wanted to fuck him, but here he is, using benreys pillow as an imitation of the real thing and jerking off in his bed

just turns right the fuck back around and goes into the bathroom and splashes some water on his face and stares down at his sudden boner

THANKS FOR READING ALL OF THIS B/C THIS ISNT EVEN GETTING INTO THE PISS STUFF THAT WEVE OBVIOUSLY BEEN THINKING ABOUT. SORRY FOR BEING LIKE THIS

[uchihashisuii]

tumblr is tryna suppress the vik truth 😔 so sending in two here we go again:

scenario where johnny is alive and in a body at the end but i think v and johnny would become... maybe not inseparable, but theyd stay extremely close. i mean they literally know each other like the backs of their hands, so theyd hang out all the time, and both show up somewhere when you only invited the one. theyre family now, and its staying that way and sometimes theyd go to talk to the other before realizing oh yeah, they were trying to talk in their head again, they dont need to do that anymore. or theyd have mostly non verbal convos where they gesture and only half start a couple sentences while the other finishes them off because they know how they other thinks, and everyone around them is like ??? could ya speak up so the rest of us can follow please. and v and johnny will hang at the clinic bc v wants to hang, and vik gets to meet the bastard that almost killed her for the first time. and hed be gruff and cold and distant (and a little pissed) because yeah johnny didnt mean to but it still happened, she was still hurt and a mess for so long, and she had so much shit to deal with. he doesn't act outright hostile or anything because he saved her too in a fucked up way, and he'll be thankful to the bastard for the rest of his life for that, even if he never admits it.but hes also veeery jealous and trying not to show it. he doesnt mean to, but theyve got this bond no one else has now, and these same quirks and jokes and johnny understands her better than literally anyone ever, how could he not be jealous of that? hes got something vik wants, and hes upset for even thinking like this i mean hes too old to feel posessive of someone he has no right to. and he recognizes this, recognizes that johnnys not going away anytime soon. hes here for good and will be here as long as v's around, theyre a weird package deal right now, but he cant stay mad for long and needs to get over being jealous because he sees why theyre both friends now despite everything. like yeah hes a prick but his hearts in the right place, and he can be funny and charming and makes v laugh, and he sees the similarities in them. the smoking, the gun tricks, the jokes and the passionate rambling, they laugh the same or give the same grin. hes not as awful as hes made out to be, because he can see where v and him started merging and its maybe not a bad thing that v changed him, he can see it from the start of their first interaction. he shouldnt be jealous of the fucked up situation they both never asked for.

(cut for length ♥)

“ - anyway all of this to say that vik would absolutely try to keep johnny at arms length if they ever met, but would very quickly grow to like him because he sees so much v in him, and he cant not like anything thats a part of v (though he can live without them hamming up their silent convos, thank you) and johnny would absolutely pick up on the jealousy thing and think it kind of funny, and rib on vik when v leaves for a minute, or tease v when they leave because viks got it bad. and once all of thats been dealt with i think vik and johnny would have this fun dynamic of like, just shitting on each other and poking fun in a light hearted way. as if like, johnnys her brother and hes just tryna hold up his own with her family. and they wont talk about it but theyd recognize they have their own places in v's heart and theyd both do anything for her and thats okay, they have different roles to fill. i just think vik and johnnys dynamic would be so neat, johnny having essentially known everything about him and all v's feelings toward him, while vik just knows him as a terrorist, and the guy that was killing someone soso important to him. johnny would make fun of vik being an old timer, and vik would dunk back that not only is johnny older than him but he could absolutely demolish him with one hand tied behind his back. but yeah, lot of good potential there. i love the idea vik being jealous of johnny and feeling like an ass for even thinking like that. johnny going 'haha simp' but then also being like 'v, i unfortunately care for you so im gonna tell you right now no one in this city is worthy of you but the doc is the only one that comes close. i swear to god make a move on him before he turns green, i cant stand seeing him pine after you. fuck him and then never speak to me about it, i dont wanna know or see anything. luv u prick' and not to say that johnny would ever replace jackie bc he couldnt, and theyre not looking for a replacement. but their dynamic would echo the one v and vik had with jackie with the jokes and teasing. and vik would see the old v, the one from before the heist come back a little with how she bounces off everyone and keeps the convo going. shed light up again in a way she hadnt in what feels like a long time. and johnny wouldnt like, become bffs with vik or anything but he wouldnt treat friendships the way he did back in 2020, so he would really try with his friendship with vik when he needs to, if only for the sake of v. because everything and everyone important to her is important to him now too, and hes gonna take this second (third?) chance seriously because hes different now, and with everything vs done for him its worth doing. (apologies for the length again 🙏)”

------------

once again i find myself with not a goddamn thing to say you put into exact words EXACTLY the things i feel about this im

im obsessed with the image of johnny and vik ripping each other to pieces (jokingly) and v being in the middle of it like “why do two people i love gotta b like this to each other” and johnny being the one to try nd get them together oh my GOD johnny loving v with his whole heart and wanting nothing but the best and for them to be happy im

[jeonmagines]

RED HEARTS | 10 | “u right he sexy”

prev | next

jungkook x reader

genere: crack, fluff, angst

summary: you draw hearts on your soulmate’s face everyday just to annoy him.

MY SIDE COMMENTS HAVE PARENTHESES I LIKE TO JUDGE MYSELF WHILE WRITING

“who ya texting?” jungkook asked as he got up to sit REALLY close to you. “oh nobody. just my mom haha” you said as you avoided eye contact. the silence in the bus was LOUD and very awkward but then he takes your hand and plays with it. “what are you doing?” you ask while staring at him like 👁👄👁. your heart was beating rapidly and you felt like the whole bus could hear it. “i like playing with people’s hands. don’t get the wrong idea. i do this to everyone.” you laugh at his response and just let him do whatever he was doing with your hand. on the other side of the bus you noticed jinah glaring at you but as soon as you made eye contact she looked away. “maybe you shouldn’t do that. your girlfriend’s looking.” you say as you move your hand away. “what? jinah? she’s not my girlfriend.” he says, intertwining your hands again.

jeon jungkook STOP PLAYING WITH MY FEELINGS

after two long hours, you finally arrived to the lake. you were growing tired so you ended up sleeping and resting your head against jungkook’s while your hands were still intertwined. (ugh just date already). “y/n, wake up we’re here.” chu says as she taps your should a couple of times. “thank you chu.” she smiles and heads down the bus. “jungkook, wake up we’re here.” you say as you shake his sleeping figure a little bit. “already? ugh but i liked our position.” he said while smirking. “uh. you’re weird. now get up the bus driver is only waiting for us.” you both grab your bags and apologize to the driver for waiting for the two of you to get your shit together.

“y/n, be roomies with me and areum.” jinah says as she interlocks her arm with your. jungkook noticed how uncomfortable you looked and he tried to come near you but jinah quickly pulled you away. when you got to your cabin, you stretched your arm because DAMN that girl’s grip was strong. “so y/n..me, areum, and a couple of the girls in our class are gonna try to have a little fun and look for the ghost at cabin 38. you in?” gGggHost?? 👁👄👁 you slightly tilted your head because who does she think she IS . “ehhh....i uhhhh. not really uh um a fan of ghosts haha.” you say as you scratch the back of your neck. “oh come on! it’ll be fun! plus we’ll be there with you.” she says with a big smile. you agreed because u ain’t no puss 😼 (peer pressure 😢 poor y/n)

“yo kook. we heard the girls are gonna go look for that ghost. you down to scare them?” jackson says as he puts his arm around jungkook’s neck. “it’s 2am i’m TIRED.” he says removing his arm about to get into bed, but jackson yanks his arm. “nOpe you’re not lets go.”

“guys! uh.. where’d you go.” it was all fun and games until you couldn’t find the girls you went with. you should have never let go of areum’s arm. “guys??? where are you?? please...” this is it you thought. this is where it ends ︶👄︶ goodbye everyone. no but fr. your vision was starting to get blurry from the tears threatening to fall from your eyes. “gUys???please i’m...im scared.” you looked around you but everything was dark and all you heard were your shoes stepping on the dead leaves. ( ahaha 😼)

you were about to just run wherever but you ain’t no dumb bitch 😼. you reached for your phone in your pocket and texted jungkook.

being scared was an understatement. at this point you were about to pee yourself, but you heard a voice call your name. “y/n?? where are you?” you recognized the voice and immediately yelled for him. “kook!! i’m here.” he followed the sound of your voice and finally got to you. you were relieved so you hugged him as tight as you possibly could. “thank you.” you said in between your sniffles. you hated that. you hated being alone ESPECIALLY in the dark. “why are you here alone huh?” he says as he looks into your eyes. “because jinah.” you say putting your head against his chest again. “fuck.” he mutters. you finally let go and he takes of his jacket putting it on you. “i already have one on though.” you laugh at his soft action towards you. “no i don’t care. lets go.” he says wrapping his arm around you.

you were nice so when you got to your cabin you didn’t slap jinah since she was sleeping. you decided to wait until she woke up the next day.

“jinah.” you walk up behind her as she’s fixing her hair. “yes y/n.” she says with a smirk. “why did you leave me last night? i trusted you! i could’ve gotten hurt! i thought we were cool.” she rolls her eyes and slams her brush down on the counter. “we were never cool y/n. jungkook liked me! but then you came along and ruined what we had!” she yelled at your face but you moved back. weren’t you the one who was supposed to be mad??? (oh have the turns have tabled 😡)

“what are you talking about? jungkook said he felt nothing towards you?” you were confused because jungkook made it pretty clear that he wasn’t interested in anybody else. (unless he was 😳) “ask him yourself.” she scoffs before pushing by you.

you were canoeing with jungkook who you DIDNT want to be partners with since he was probably just playing with your feelings. “y/n why aren’t you talking to me?” you continue paddling, ignoring him and not making eye contact. “jungkook, row the right way!” you yell because he was cLEARLY doing this to get your attention. “jungkook!” yOU YELP as you both fall into the water. “uGh iCANT SWIM.” you grabbed onto the canoe but your hands just kept slipping. the other students watched and tried to help you but y’all were just....struggling struggling. “uGh JUNGKOOK!! what’s wRONG WITH YOU!!!” you grab onto his back and he swims to your teacher’s canoe. he lifts you up and then himself. “i hate you so much.” you say as u roll ur eyes at him.

“y/n! please just talk to me!” you speed walk towards your cabin, footsteps squeaking every time you took a step. “what?!” you say finally turning around. “what did i do?” he was actually really confused he thought you liked him. “stop playing with my feelings! if you like jinah then go be with her! you make it seem as if you like me back but you just... UGH.” you glare at him and turn back around to get dried up in your cabin.

today you were FINALLY going home. you placed your bags under the bus and quickly got inside so that you got the window seat. you sat down and jungkook sat right next to you. “move.” you say looking out the window. “no. not until you forgive me. i’m sorry okay? i never meant to upset you. what i did was really shitty. you deserve so much better. i don’t care if you don’t want anything to do with me but i just want you to know that i...i like you.” he confessed. your eyes widen and you turn towards him. “i like you too jungkook...but we shouldn’t rush. i’m not sure what i want yet.” he nods and scoots over closer to you.

TAGS: @taeissoadorable @c-cr @littlewolfieposts @aestheticsluut @complicatedjules @ayasanuwu @lil-bai-of-sunshine @my-suga-kookies @rockerchic93 @t-toodumbtocare @withlovestudyblr @seabasschino @dru-shadow @letmebeyour-sun @ladyartemesia @squidyelmosquidbutt @supersoldierfreak @anna-in-purple @bangtansleftnut @jungshookmeup @mangoisawesome @ayoo-bangtan @cypheruby @yuusilverscar @spookidema @depressed-dude20 @fandomstogetherweunite @brattykpoc @tallsunflower @nochujjk97 @m0chilattae @nctssidehoe @bringitseijoh @richkookie @gaburen @saroonga @llovekoya @ladybeautiful18 @writersparaphrenalia @xxxanimangxxx @rjsmochii @just-call-me-trash-can @mystic-jungkook @competativekook @tae165 @rosita7703 @gyubots @xxxanimangxxx @na-na-nakita @doilooklikeinoe

[if-the-crown-fits-translate-it]

Discord pt 87

[Date: 17/03, 01.51 PM - 17/03, 03.53 PM GMT]

[This conversation was going on in #general2, simultaneously to another in #arg. The second is referenced later and will be posted separately after this one.]

Prince: “Hello, everyone. It's been a while. :)”

fetch: “oh hey buddy :]”

Maxwell: “Oh hey prince longtime no see”

fetch: “and goodmornin everyone”

[donti: “hi prince, whats up”]

Prince: “Not much. Still kind of... off from last night. It's been a long time since I've had those thoughts, so I'm still reeling a bit.”

fetch: “well at least you're doing better now. baron mentioned you went to the comfort room? that musta helped a lot”

Prince: “...Yeah, it helped a little bit.”

[Maxwell: “Been a while since I’ve seen ya prince hope things are going okay”]

Prince: “Yeah... I'm sorry, I've just been really out of it lately. I'm not sure what my deal is.”

[fetch: “have you been eating and drinking well? exercise and sunshine might help too”]

Prince: “Yeah, I've been doing all that! It's just... I don't know. I think I just miss my family. That's all...”

fetch: “aw :(”

Maxwell: “It’s fine I haven’t been feeling the best either lately....though I know what it is I just don’t know how to fix it ha”

Prince: “I'm sorry to hear that, Max. I hope things get better for you soon :)”

fetch: “i hope things get better for you too! missing family is always hard”

Maxwell: “I hope so as well....we’re trying to figure out ways to get rid of what’s bothering me but I hope you feel better soon too”

Prince: “They'll be here soon, so I think I'm just starting to get anxious for them to be back already :)”

fetch: “I'm supposed to keep it a secret, but i can give you a hint! my favorite number is how many days away it is :)”

Prince: “I'm supposed to keep it a secret, but i can give you a hint! my favorite number is how many days away it is :)”

fetch: “...4?

no wait it was 5, we had the same favorite number right?

no wait”

LLyr: “3, according to the blog”

fetch: “...3. 3 days?

well call me jesus fucking christ”

Prince: “Yep! i can't wait to see them all again! :D”

fetch: “im. im glad! :]”

Prince: “I think I'll feel a lot better when they're back. I wanted Viscount to teach me how to play guitar but he left so suddenly I never got the chance to ask. I'm glad it's so soon. I don't think I can wait much longer :)”

[Jack: “That’s so cool! Maybe you can teach him to play violin in return, haha”]

Prince: “Maybe, if he wants to learn! :D”

Jack: “:D

Y’all could duet maybe”

Prince: “I’d like that! :D”

Maxwell: “I....hope things go well if they come back”

[donti: “What else are you planning on doing when they all come back?”]

Prince: “Well, Page likes to draw, so I was thinking we could draw together, and I always love to play with Knight! :D As for the fourth, I'm going to have to get to know them a little better first :)”

donti: “Oh! Is the fourth arriving on the 20th?”

Prince: “They all are, yes :)”

Prince: “I've been thinking... do they miss us as much as I miss them? They... they had to have left for a reason, after all.”

Maxwell: “......I....”

Maxwell: “I think they do you miss you.....”

[fetch: “maybe they're just the type to run off on adventures? I did all the time as a kid”]

Prince: “Maybe... I hope that's the case. I probably shouldn't be thinking like this. I just can't help it for some reason... what if I did something wrong to make them want to leave, to make them hate me? You know? Crown said that these thoughts will go away soon. I really hope so. I hate having them.”

Maxwell: “No no it isnt your fault....trust me i know it isnt”

[fetch: “I'm sure they don't hate you buddy :[ you aren't the only one they left behind. They left countess and baron and crown too”]

Prince: “Baron's been spending all his time in the comfort room and I'm pretty sure Countess lives in the library at this point. And Crown can't be here as often. I'm always alone...”

[fetch: “Maybe try striking up conversation with countess? Maybe she can teach you some ciphers!”]

Prince: “Maybe... are you guys sure I didn't do something wrong? I know I mess up a lot without meaning to...”

Maxwell: “its not your fault trust me”

fetch: “Yeah, you're a-okay :D”

Prince: “...I keep seeing arguing pop up on my screen from another channel. Is everything alright?” [The channel referenced is #arg]

fetch: “oh yeah everything's cool :] don't worry bout it”

Maxwell: “yeah yeah uh dont worry”

Prince: “If you're sure... I am the messenger after all :) If something is wrong, I have to let Crown know”

Maxwell: “Nope nothing is wrong its fine”

[fetch: “honestly, I think everything is going according to plan for crown! so he'd be pleased to know that :]”]

Prince: “I'll let him know that, then :D”

Prince: “While I'm here, is there anything else I should let Crown know when he arrives?”

fetch: “let him know... he's getting what he wants.”

Maxwell: “fetch what...”

Prince: “It really doesn't seem like the argument is nothing... do you promise everything is okay? Or is this just another situation where everyone is lying to protect me?”

fetch: “its alright. we're done fighting.”

fetch: “it's okay its fine everything's okay and im gonna take a nap”

donti: “Sorry about that Prince. Tensions are a little high right now”

Maxwell: “yeah....”

Prince: “I just want everyone to be okay... that's all. If there's something wrong, you can tell me :)”

Prince: “Should i read through it?”

Maxwell: “No!”

Spark: “No!”

Maxwell: “Its fine its fine no need”

Kate: “I think reading through it would upset you and we don't want that, but it's not like its hidden from you so I guess if you did want to read it, it's there”

donti: “best if you didnt,”

Jack: “A lot of it is really angry, but if you want we won’t hide it from you.”

Prince: “...

I see.”

donti: “did you read it?”

Prince: “I'll... I'll be sure to let Crown know everything is going according to plan...”

Maxwell: “prince please tell me you didnt

prince....please”

donti: “...”

[Kate: “You read it, didn't you, Prince?”]

Prince: “...yes.”

Maxwell: “how much did you read?”

Maxwell: “like....all of today or anything with yesterday..”

Prince: “I.. I guess I hope you like your new circlets... Page... ? Knight...? That...that is who you two are, isn't it?”

Maxwell: “i....”

Maxwell: “im....max”

Prince: “...

Right. Sorry.”

Maxwell: “and fetch....is fetch...”

Maxwell: “its not your fault”

Prince: “You were Page and Knight before, though, weren't you? Before you left?”

Prince: “.. why did you leave?”

Maxwell: “ okay yes we were

but we didnt leave because of you

or baron or countess”

Maxwell: “ i...

we...well...”

Maxwell: “we werent ourselves

although we were page and knight thats...not who are or rather not who are anymore”

Prince: “...

...Do you still like us as Max and Fetch..?”

Maxwell: “yes yes of course!

we still all care for you”

[donti: “how could they not”]

Prince: “Why else would they leave us?”

Maxwell: “we....werent very happy

neither me, fetch or marcus were really ourselves”

Prince: “... I don't understand. I thought everyone was happy. You guys all seemed so happy. That doesn't make any sense.”

Maxwell: “its why you see such a difference in how we act compared to who we were

it....wasnt us”

Prince: “Things are better here, though. I’m happier here with Crown than I ever was without him... Son’t you guya want to be happy?”

Maxwell: “i wasnt truly happy neither were the others

That doesn’t mean we don’t care about you though, Asher, we still do”

Prince: “...Asher... That’s my... my name...

...”

Maxwell: “yes it is”

Prince: “Asher...? Asher... Asher..” [At this point, some letters are not in Ender]

Maxwell: “asher?

you okay?”

Prince: “Wait. No, stop. I don’t want to remember, please”

Maxwell: “i...”

Prince: “Please”

Prince: “I don’t want to remember”

donti: “Hey buddy pal prince, asher, whoever you are.

friend. youre fine.

breathe.”

Prince: “I’m not Asher I’m not Asher I’m Prince just Prince”

Jack: “If you want us to call you prince, that’s fine.”

Prince: “I’m not Asher I’m not Asher”

Jack: “Prince. Breathe.”

Prince: “What did you do make it stop”

Jack: “Prince. Just breathe. Calm down.”

donti: “breathe. breathe. calm.”

Prince: “...”

fetch: “this is why I wanted to drop it.”

donti: “we’re sorry, please,”

Jack: “You’re remembering what’s been taken away. It’s not happy, but you can breathe through it.”

Maxwell: “fuck fuck fuck”

[mrpenguinpants]

Alright, I finally read Reincarnation no Kaben

AFTER MONTHS (it’s probably been a month? My mind doesn’t keep track of the days) I FINALLY CAUGHT UP TO RNK. Ty to Okita anon for the recommendation (*￣3￣)╭💕💕💕 I absolutely loved it. 

After this I’ll start on the other recommendation you gave me. I kept a bit of a log of my reading journey under the read more tag. 

Major spoilers for literally everything in RNK up to ch 53 “Withdrawal”. 

Oh, and I’ll finish answering all my leftover asks and I SHOULD have a fic done by tomorrow. I was so ready to write and then I got up. Now I’m back to bed. 

I’m just gonna write this as a log since I read super super slow and I’m only on ch 7 at the start of writing this but I’m really liking it already. Though to be fair. I love everything okita anon recommends haha. I remember you saying you were simping over Kouu and I haven’t gotten to the part where he appears but I wanted to quickly google what he looked like to prepare myself and I see this:

Well. That’s reassuring. 

I was actually kinda surprised by how many western figures were in the manga since I know there are only like 7? Around 7 western figures that pop up in any anime/manga but seeing people like Albert Fish was kinda surprising but I really liked it. Also, at the end of certain chapters they write little bio’s on them so you get to know more about them was such a nice touch.  I also love that the tradition of making males -> females still stays strong even outside the fate universe hehe.

---

Literally, the next chapter I see him. AHHHHHHHHH. Well maybe not him but his eyeballs. 

This guy lowkey reminds me of the MC’s brother but it’s 99% because he has the same long ponytail. I wouldn’t be surprised if the brother was apart of the the Greats. Honestly, Ein reminds me of those really hard headed girls that are actually really kind on the inside but aren’t good at expressing themselves (maybe because that’s pretty much her character). I also like that Ein doesn’t like males but she’s hiding behind this guy. At least, I’m..99% sure this is Ein. 

I FUCKING KNEW IT. AS SOON AS I SAW HE GOT A THEIF TALENT I COULD FEEL THE SOLO LEVELING VIBES IN ME. HE CAN STEAL TALENTS I FUCKING KNEW IT!!! I’m surprised that Neumann didn’t say anything and  Haito seems to be aware of it.  

Edit: Ah okay, I understand a bit now but it almost seems like Haito is the only one aware of Toya’s second talent.

Edit 2: Okay, as much as I love power hungry MC’s I’m really glad they didn’t make Toya into that. I am such a softie for sympathetic and kind MC’s like these even though it’s been done so many times. I’m really glad this didn’t feel like a rehash. I mean, some points some of the stuff Toya says it does but it’s fine, I don’t mind that. I actually gave a crap about him since I usually prefer the side characters (I UNDERSTAND ANON, I CARE ABOUT KOUU SO MUCH AHHHHH) but HAITO?? AHHHHH. 

---

I like that Izo always has the same hat in every adaptation he’s in lol. Istg, cats are always op. Schrodinger seems so strong and the parallel universes are my absolute shit. Sometimes I think, in one universe I did this and in this universe I’m not. Would I rather stay in this universe or be in the one where I am actually productive. Usually I pick the productive universe and actually work but sometimes I’m a bit of a slacker haha. I think this is my approach to a lot of things in life. But I digress, I don’t wanna get too deep into my life. 

I can sorta sympathize with the sinners. At least the ripper guy to say the least. I love love love unhinged characters that just want to basically destroy the world or at least have fun. But then you find out- wait they are actually sympathetic oh no. That’s how I felt about Djoser in “im the great priest imhotep” (please...i beg...someone read this...I’m so starved). 

As much as character development and rooting for the hero is cool and all, I just want to simp for the crazy “let’s burn the world to the ground” kinda character. I’m also so glad Toya doesn’t automatically become evil and try and steal everyone’s talents because he does seem like a good person and I really don’t see him suddenly switching fields so when he saved (I don’t remember names I’m sorry), the undead solider it was really nice. Proves that he still has his humanity and isn’t strictly relying on the branch of sin. 

It makes sense that he wants to steal talents since he never had one (and it was kinda out of left field when he killed Vlad and we just never addressed that ever again haha) but to see him actually consider his actions and if he actually want’s to steal his teammates talents feels right to me. Poor guy doesn’t seem to have a lot of friends so this is the first time he’s ever seemed to have companionship, aside from Haito, so I really hope he doesn’t attempt to steal their talents. I think I’m thinking of the slime? That time I got reincarnated as a slime manga/anime. Where he’s the pokemon catcher of skills. I thought that was where it was going. 

But I do kinda like how selfish Haito and Toya’s talent stealing relationship is (I mean, later it develops but my first draft of writing this I wasn’t there yet). I’m not sure if selfish or like self-gratitude/pride is the right word but it’s kind of a breath of fresh air. Rather than Haito trying to contain or “help” Toya’s inferiority she’s actually encouraging it and using her own talent for her own...acknowledgement? Er, yeah let’s go with that. 

---

This. This interaction. I love this. Like, genuinely love this. We need more of this. Two people from opposite sides finding some common ground and their fight to the death is less about morals or whose on whose side but for themselves. I love that. This is actually some wholesome stuff. 

Edit: AHHHHH CATCH MY UGLY CRYING IN THE BACK BECAUSE ALL THE “SINNERS” ARE ACTUALLY AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH. IM DEAD. YOU’VE KILLED ME. 

---

I KNEW IT! YOU CAN NEVER TRUST THESE KIND OF PEOPLE!! I’m going to slap the whiteboard on this but if I see any “goofy” character I’m immediately sus of them. 

As much as I hate that Hitler is getting drawn as a small child I really like this. I know the whole, oh I killed your friends but I’m letting you go because you express humanity but I’m gonna finish my death with a sympathetic line, can be annoying to people but idk I really liked this. 

Honestly this and the undead soldiers death hit me hard ngl. This manga might not have my favourite art style during some points compared to like main stream manga but it has some really beautiful scenes. 

BOOM CALLED IT, though it’s pretty obvious lol. 

THE PONY TAIL NEVER LIES AND HES DA VINCI IT MAKES SENSE NOW

He looks so cute lol. I like that Seiya has the talent of being talented in everything while Toya has the talent to steal other talents. Seiya can probably only cap his power by his own physical/mental abilities with Toya can pull a solo leveling and go further beyond. Thinking of it like jack of trades vs master of none type deals. Though, I might be thinking too hard on this. I like that this man is actually humble but I really wish there was a tiny bit more to him since we only get this one interaction/backstory but the manga isn’t completed yet. I really hope we get to know about Seiya more;; like how he became da vinci or etc. 

Everytime I see Neumann I look at that comic sans type and it kills me on the inside. But I love that her eyes are 01 just, mwah perfection. These little details that aren’t that big but it’s soooo nice. I also ahem, unhinged character heart be still. It’s really nice reading manga in bursts because you can see the art progression and damn does she look good. 

tiny fang appreciation post. 

ngl i’M HARD SIMPING FOR THIS MAN. It’s the pony tail, I have such a thing for guys with long hair (and this is why genshin broke me) but man the art really picked up here. 

I didn’t get into it but OKITA ANON I GET IT. KOUU??? AHHHH. WHY DID YOU HAVE TO DIE??? As much as his whole “war” was a bit questionable in the beginning and tbh I still don’t really get it I like that he knows he’s not the same as the other Greats but still tries to help the other “sinners” in a way only he knows. That’s why Seiya was so important;; I get that he wanted them to have a fun death and to be understood but idk, the whole war idea and having them kill each other (especially the Hitler fights because I understand the others since they reached some kind of acknowledgement) but nonetheless, what a great guy.

Nightingale gives me mad masaki vibes from chainsawman. I hate them and I can’t wait for you to fail, but the inner part of my is cheering for you because unhinged characters are my shit. I feel really bad for Neumann, I had suspicions she wasn’t actually like that since it’s sooo out of left field but I’m really glad the manga seems to know what it’s doing. I really wish we got more Kouu interactions with everyone tho. 

NOW THIS. THIS IS SOME WHOLESOME STUFF. I WANT THIS. I REALLY WANT SPIN-OFF OF REALLY SAD ANIME/MANGA/STORIES WHERE ALL THE DEAD PEOPLE HANG OUT. That’s how I’m feeling about JJK and the scroll segments or BSD WAN that just came out. IT’S SO WHOLESOME TO SEE EVERYONE NOT TRYING TO KILL EACH OTHER. 

UGLY SOBBING IN THE CLUBBB AND KOUU AND CHARLOTTE AHHHH. I hate how this is phrased but the respect I have for Hitler?? YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW HARD THAT IS TO TYPE?? Kitazuka is cool tho, I really like him. Some god given talent. I’m hard simping over him but I really hope we get to know more about him later. 

Getting smug mona vibes, I love this. 

AHHH IVE NEVER FELT THIS UPSET OVER AN APPLEEEE. I’M ACTUALLY UPSET. IF HE DIES IM ACTUALLY GOING TO CRY MY HEART OUT. 

THE FAMOUS SLAP 

I’M SORRY WHA- SLENDERMAN?

Oh..wow. Okay, be still my heart. When I first saw her I thought she was really pretty but now I’m absolutely smitten. God damn, can I please have some more crumbs on these characters before they die;; 

AHHH SAME GIRL FUCKING SAME????? I adore these small panels and translator notes. It’s a real breather after the sad 3am hours talk these characters go through. 

Yagyuu. Jesus christ. WHY ARE ALL THE DEATH SCENES IN THIS MANGA ACTUALLY SO PRETTY AND STABS ME IN THE HEART??? that’s it. goodbye. im fucking out. im actually so upset rn. WHAT HAVE YOU DONE TO ME? 

---

In conclusion, and I should probably re-read what the characters say and not go off on memory because I’m about to get really deep. I really like how they phrased why they wanted to stop the branch of sin. That there are people just like Toya and Haito who, if they never found the branch of sin, could still probably lead respectable and okay lives. That there was a “them” in another universe that didn’t go down that road and that they want to be in the same universe as “them”. I know this sounds really confusing if you haven’t read the manga but going back to what I said about the parallel universe stuff. 

There was a universe where Toya and Haito didn’t rely on the branch of sin, that even without their talents from becoming a returner, they could still live a happy life given their own personalities and attitudes. It was kinda moving since in the beginning, Toya wanted a talent so badly and now that he has one. He’s realizing that wait, I don’t need a past life talent in order to live. Honestly, I hard relate to that because I totally agree with him. If you have a talent you can probably live a very happy and comfortable life that other factors wouldn’t matter if you just have that incredible talent. Thinking of it as a painter or artist, if you had actual god-given talent you wouldn’t need to worry about other factors since people would naturally seek that talent. So you end up comparing yourself to others and setting that limit on yourself. 

But that’s okay, it’s completely natural and I’m not saying it’s horrible if you do this. Fuck, I do this all the time. I’m not saying the manga is changing my life but it’s kind of refreshing that it get’s talked about since other adaptations of this just make the character super OP. I understand wanting to have that incredible talent, fuck who doesn’t? but you don’t need it in order to live earnestly in the bigger picture sense. Not everything you do has to be productive and honestly, learning to be okay with having fun is nice. Just being okay with who you are right now, even if it isn’t perfect in your eyes, you still have time to build upon yourself and your own talents but doing it for yourself. 

But I probably missed the point and I’m going way to deep haha. But I really enjoyed reading this and thank you once again to okita anon for the recommendation^^ I always love everything you send me and I’ll start reading the next one. If anyone else has any recommendations let me know! 

[rhaenyraisadyke]

A Year Later Transcript: 8/3/21

Here it all is on a google doc if that is easier to read!

W: “I heard there was a special place.. Where men could go and emancipate.. The brutality and the tyranny of their rulers…” Do you know that one Ranboo?

R: I have I have I have, I’ve heard that one a few times, I had a friend that sings that one quite a lot.

W: Yeah it's great, I- I personally, I am a big big fan of the song and not just because I wrote it, I know, I know they saw aww yeah they say you are your own worst critic, but I mean, I think it's good. Do you know what it's based on?

R: Mhm mhm

W: Obviously it's based on hallelujah, but the thing is Ranboo, right is the reason we did it is because Tommy used to sing hallelujah to the plants around the thing... the caravan! Do you remember the caravan? You have heard of the caravan right?

R: Yeah, yeah I’ve heard of it and seen the re-creation of it at the museum, but that's really it.

W: Actually can we go see it? Let's go see it quickly!

R: Yeah, sure.

W: So, so, he used to plant the stuff around the caravan, and it made it grow better, he hehe used to ha, my man Tommy, what is this? This is new.. I won’t ask questions…

R: I- Someone planted a lot of beats here and I don’t know why

W: OH, okay I quite like it, it looks really nice, it looks nicer than the target that used to be here. Um

R: Yeah

W: So my man Tommy used to sing to the plants to make them grow better um and that was the song he used to sing so I thought what a better way to honor tommy, one of the most loyal members of our fair nation then to name the song after him and base the song after his little muse. Tommy is all of our muse really, I'd say. So here's the museum.

R: Yeah, Yeah

W: I haven't been to the museum, wait las- that's where I met you Ranboo right?

R: Oh yeah yeah, that's where you saw me next to the um poster of myself… I don't know why that's still up, I kinda put that there and it preceded to stay there, is it still set up? Oh, oh no.

W: It’s not still up anymore it was here, it was right here on this wall. I quite liked it, but I guess not enough for it to be history though.

R: I’m not historical yet apparently.

W: So yeah in here, in here where the declaration of independence would sit on the wall here, it was actually quite, quite a nice van, not quite as nice as yours, I quite liked what you were doing with yours. Have you been working on it since I’ve been gone?

R: Yeah I’ve been working on it. I added a nice little table outside and did some pathways and appropriately themed flowers.

W: Thats nice

R: Yeah!

W: Let's go to Lmanburg or what was lmanburg, last time I saw it was a big glass thing.

R: Yeah I think it goes by Lmanhole now apparently.

W: Ahh ehh, that's kind of rude, it's kind of rude to Lmanburgs history you know?

R: mhm

W: It’s called Lmanburg, it's called Lmanburg. NOT Manberg NOT Lcrater or whatever, Lmanhole I don’t care it's now Lmanburg it's always Lmanburg. It’s just how it goes.

R: Okay

W: Yeah so that's why the song exists as it is. Oh there's no glass.

R: Yeah! Yeah I mean it seems to have changed a little bit.

W: YOOOO I actually didn’t know this was here

R: Yeah! It’s even got the flag down there at the bottom

W: It’s got the flag man! Can we go down and see the flag? Cmon Cmon lets go

R: Yeah yeah wait you alright?

W: I’m like a lemming I don’t care I’m just gonna jump

R: Oh well okay… careful!

W: Look at this dude!

R: Yeahh

W: Oh wow I really went down to bedrock didn't I? Holy Shit.. I did a number on this place. This is amazing!! Ahhh This is what it deserved, not the glass bullshit, this is what it needed, this like beautiful overgrowing, it feels like it happened, it doesn't feel like a monument, it feels like nature has claimed it back,

R: The book has kind of closed in that sense

W: Yeah.. we’ve got, look they have got they rebuilt the lake man! And this used to be a real river about here into Lmanburg- wait, Ranboo do you see that is that Tubbo?

R: Yeah… that's Tubbo

W: Aye Tubbo!

T: “I heard there was a special place where men could go and emancipate…”

W: Tubbo?

T: “ the tyranny” - oh?

W: Tubbo!

T: Hello?

W: Haha! You’ve came, I- I havent seen you dude in FUCKING ages! Tubbo, are you singing the song?

T: Yeah… Yeahhh?

W: Are you? Are you singing the thing?

T: Yeah hello?

W: Hold on I’m coming im coming im coming man

T: Where are you?

W: Hold on, I'm coming around, here I come, Tubbo man! I haven't seen you in ages!

T: H-H..Hello.. Wilbur..

W: I’m coming around man!

T: Yeah aha…

W: Bro! Its-

T: Weird seeing you here.

W: What in Lmanburg? That seems like the most normal place to see me.

T: Uhh yeah I suppose so

W: Well I- dude I don’t even know what to say to you man, it's like looking in a little mirror, you are even still wearing my suit still?

T: Yeahh

W: How long have you been wearing that?

T: Oh I just put it on for today, I just for it's been a year now…

W: Well you look good in it! Ranboo have you met Tubbo?

R: Yeah! Well I’ve I’ve met him, I mean we’ve um… been around yeah

W: Well Tubbo I’m really happy to see you man, dude

T: Ah, well thank you.

W: Do you even know what happened? Since,

T: What do you mean what's happened?

W: I saw you briefly man when I was resurrected, I remember you SUPER SUPER briefly but this is the first time we have actually gotten to speak, I- I will admit I was a little overwhelmed during that whole thing. I was running across the glass, thank god it's gone, this is far more adpt, but I was running across the glass, I’m sorry I wasn't you know, entirely on the same page, but I promise you I’ve calmed down I’m all settled in, I understand what's changed, what's happened whos new, whos old whos still about who uh…. Who trusts me and stuff

T: Did they fill you in on the story? Like what happened here after you died?

W: Yeah, they did, I’m gonna be honest with you it's not a pretty one, I kind of left a bit of a ripple. If I was a rock, dropped in a lake, I’m a pretty big rock

T: You- yeah’

W: And I can’t say I’m not- I’m not flattered. I mean I am flattered, I’m not TOO upset about it, I like being the big ripple, but more than anything, I want to say super simple man. I want to say. I want to say I’m sorry

T: Awe

W: For one thing mainly, I’ve been thinking about this for years, LITERAL years. I’m sorry for making you president specifically before blowing it up and I’m sorry for when I did this and blew all this up and making this hole,

T: Well I mean-

W: and making you president of a crater and i'm sorry. I’m really really sorry. I really am

T: I mean this wasnt all you Wilbur….

W: We’ll get to that, do you? Do you forgive me?

T: Yeah, I do forgive you

W: Man, ahhh my little treasury, secretary treasury, do you remember that?

T: Yeah yeah I remember that. Secretary to treasury

W: Ranboo he was the secretary to treasury and then he was president

R: Yeah

W: And then he was president

T: Yeah I’m pretty sure the treasury was like somewhere there.

W: So what were you saying about me not being the one there who blew it up?

T: Well I mean you definitely blew it up. I feel like you’re missing some vital information.

W: Wait, so you rebuilt it? How long -how long did it stand before this happened?

T: Yeah so, me, and mainly ghostbur honestly like

W: ….ghostbur….

T: He- put so much effort into making it right again.

W: Is he this obsidian crap I take it and these uh? Fucking lanterns

T: You know dream?

W: Yeah I know Dream- I love him. Dream’s Dreams

T: Oh..

W: Dreams probably my favorite person, sorry Ranboo i mean uh no contest here, Dreams probably my favorite person he saved me

T: Oh.. Oh..

W: He saved me he brought me back to life

T: Well um yeah I mean he was powerful I guess but um Techno and Philza yeah um

W: Techno and Phil blew this up?

T: They built this big obsidian contraption overnight… I couldn’t even see it coming. And they rained TNT for days.

W: nhh

R: Yeah…

W: And that's.. Wait hold on, why would Techno and Phil do this? Why would Techno and Phil blow up Lmanburg? Didn’t they live here? I mean I don’t know about Techno…

T: Techno and Phil, they hated the government, it was partially my fault as well…

W: But you didn’t blow it up

T: No, I didn't. I never wished for anything to happen like this.

W: So it was just Techno and Phil?

T: Y-y yes..

W: Sorry that's kind of just hit my not the blowing up part- You know I’ve done that,

T: Yeah

W: I’m not shaken up about that. I’m shaken up about man, is that, you rebuilt this! After I was gone

T: I can’t take all the credit obviously but there was a big effort

W: That fucking ghost- who cares man YOU rebuilt this! Bro, you

T: Yeah I suppose

W: MY fucking grave! I was so pressed about not having a grave, screw a grave I built something that you loved that YOU wanted to preserve… thats,

T: Yeah, I really honestly…

W: Tubbo that's worth more to me than a grave. That's worth more to me than this shrine. That's worth more to me then- Tubbo this is probably the best gift I have ever been given, this knowledge that people actually cared enough, that you cared enough to rebuild this community after it fell.

T: Ahh, I’m glad you’re happy.

W: You… haha, sorry, aww man, Tubbo thank you.

T: It’s alright, I just feel lost without Lmanburg. All my core beliefs.. Everything died with it.

W: You feel lost without Lmanburg

T: I have no purpose.. Anymore.

W: I guess that's where anarchy fails… Tubbo, I have a little, a little thing coming. Not big, nothing much yet, ehh, it's not a big deal you know, it's a little burger van at the moment but I got plans, big plans. Tubbo it's called paradise

T: Paradise.

W: Yeah, yeah will, would you like to come join me in paradise? Literally?

T: Hmmmm, Id, I’m not sure Wilbur, I’m not sure I trust you man. In order to follow someone I need to trust them.

W: Wait… wait- but I thought you forgave me!

T: Yeah Wilbur I forgive you because I like to hang onto the hope that people change but, I don’t trust you yet Wilbur.

W: Okay… Taboo. I literally was dead for thirteen years. I know it wasn't long for you, I know it was only a couple months for you but thirteen years Tubbo… Thirteen years of my life. I am old! Look at me! I’m not the same young man you knew. I-I’ve been through it and in those years, I’ve learned Tubbo, i wasn't just sat twiddling my thumbs just going “oooh this is nice ohhh i'm in darkness right now” you know I was thinking. I relived that explosion in my head so many times man, and I get that you don’t trust me, I do but like man! Look at me bro, I’m not gonna do it again, I’m not gonna hurt you again. I’m not gonna you know… I know you, you had the festival with Technoblade, I never spoke properly to you about this.

T: mm

W: I could have saved you…

T: But you didn’t

W: I- Tubbo… I’m reaching out to you man, I’m on my knees.. I, I’m sorry. I’m really really sorry and I literally, your forgiveness means so much to me but it doesnt give up what I did to you and it doesnt give up how I failed you as a friend, you know eh, fuck being as a coworker but just you know anything… Ranboo you might know or have known all of this and I’m really sorry if this was your first of hearing I can explain later on but like..

R: Alright………

W: Tubbo, man, I’m, I want to make it up to you. And you know what? I appreciate you don’t trust me. I do.

T: Wilbur in order for you to gain my trust back you have to prove it first. I can’t just give it out anymore. I used to be able to, but I just, I just can’t.

W: Tubbo… I really appreciate it, and I mean that genuinely. I appreciate it and I am gonna go out and prove to you I’m worth being trusted again. I promise.

T: Okay…

W: I’ll do it. I’ll do it. I’ll redeem myself and you'll.. Youll

T: Do you know I still have dreams right? Of the explosion… And, and of the fireworks. And all of it. I vividly see all of it every day. It HURTS. It hurts Wilbur a lot.

W: I- Tubbo, Tubbo, I know, I know, Tubbo, Tubbo, Tubbo Tubbo, please, I know…. I’m sorry, I’m sorry. I- arhh It feels like sorry is such a weak word. I feel like there's nothing stronger that I can say, and I understand what you mean about how my actions need to reflect it and they will. Give me time. I’m gonna make something. I'm gonna make something of this and I’m gonna…

Uhhhh

Tubbo do you know how fucking strong you are? And I’m not trying to say - I’ve got your forgiveness, but I know I need to earn your trust but man… you're so strong man, genuinely. Just the fact you proved to me that just there that you have these memories and these nightmares, you still found it in your heart to forgive me, that's... You’re a fucking champion man. You’re a hero.

Look I get you don’t want to join me in paradise. We won’t talk about that anymore but, cmon, at least come and see, come and at least see what me and Ranboo have been doing! Look I don’t know- Ranboo are you? Are you and Tubbo friends? Are you and Tubbo like good friends?

R: Yeah, yeah I’d say so.

W: Then why don't you and him come and see what I’ve made! Come and see what I’ve got going on! Lets go lets go!

T: I think.. I think I’m gonna stay here, Wilbur. I think I’m fine, just to stay here.

W: No, no man, no worries. Look at me bro look at me bro! Chin up! Look, lucky rabbit's foot!

T: Okay…

W: Tommy gave it to me

T: Lucky Rabbit's foot…

W: Lucky Rabbit's foot man, chin up. Ranboo, I’ll, you can come, it's cool.

R: I will, I will. Do you need me to stay here?

T: No.. *sniffles* I’d like to be left alone please

R: Oh… you sure? I mean.. I can stay…

T: Yes. I’m fine

R:You sure? Okay...

W: Ranboo! Let's go man.

R: Yep! Lets- lets go

W: Cya tubbo! I’ll send a letter!

T: Uhuh

W: Comeon Ranboo

R: Alright

W: Ah man! It’s its I mean I I was gonna say this is hard, but obviously it's hard, I’ve -

R: It is, it is

W: It's difficult man and I’ve been you know it's gonna get better and it's gonna be worth it when I see them smiling.

R: Yeah, yeah

W: Tubbo, Jack, Niki, Tommy, anyone… Do you know who the original Lmanburg group were? Do you know who we were?

R: Ah, uhh I think most of them yeah, I think it was you, Jack, Niki, Fundy I believe as well

W: Fundy was after, Fundy was a bit after we got independence

R: mhm yeah I don’t really. I don’t really know much of lmanburg history

W: That’s alright you’ve got it down, it's correct. It’s that group and we um yeah we fought against Dream and we managed to succeed and we created a life process. Ranboo I’m gonna tell you something I’ve never really told anyone, I try and keep this on the low because I don’t want uh people to use it against me is the main problem. I didn’t even tell Tommy. I- I lied to Tommy I’m gonna be honest. I’ll tell him soon

R: Yeah

W: I’ll tell him I lied to him because I feel- it kind of eats away at me. I kind of- I told Tommy that I didn’t actually care about Lmanburg and that it was actually a tool for me to get and gain power and stuff but it's not true. Lmanburg was really important to me and it is still to this day. I want it, I want its history to live on, not as a stain caused by me because I basically took a bit shit on the history books. I wanna, I wanna make it feel like it was you know something that happened and it was a great thing. Think of the good times, the years and years well not years but you know the time of safety the time of fun, prosperity! We built parks, we built you know, no taxes, big walls, we had democracy! All be a slightly disjointed version of it but you know, that's how people should remember Lmanburg, that's what people think of when they think of our nation you know? And that's, and Tubbos the last connection we really have, I mean he, he said it himself, he's kind of you know… he's got nothing without it. I’ve heard of what Tommy, Tommys you know moved on and Jacks moved on and Niki’s moved on and everyones moved on at least partially… but Tubbo man, he's still……

R: Yeah he's still very strung up about it even though it's been awhile… He, he distracts himself with projects and everything which is nice but, you

W: Heh, projects

R: I mean yeah fortifications as well

W: I think he's gonna be alright

R: I hope so

W: I’m looking out for him. Anyway I want to say thank you Ranboo for you know trusting me this quick, I mean you barely know me

R: I mean, yeah

W: You barely have known me very long and you just know you’ve done all this with me and you’ve worked with me and I- I- you know I don’t I don’t know where I’d be without you here right now, man. T-Tommy’s great and all he's here and all but I don't wanna string him along too much because hes- I, when I look at him, when I look at him and he's helping me out and building things with me, I - I see the same eyes that looked at me when… when… there weren't some fun times in the ravine of Pogtopia I wasn't a very well man, and I can just see Tommy from that day…

oH!! Ranboo! This looks great man!

R: Yeah yea, I’ve made a couple of um changes to it. Added some stuff to it

W: Like I was saying though, I appreciate it, I really appreciate it.

R: Yeahh, yeah of course! Of course

W: May I ask, I know I’ve already asked this before but why do you trust me so fast? What's the…?

R: I mean I like to normally see the good in people and everything.

W: I know we’ve gone through that and you’ve made me cry just

R: Yeahhh, sorry about that, but I- I think the reason I think I know what it's like to have no one hurt or at least feel like no one trusts you.

W: Mhm

R: Um, and I- I’ve realised that if no one is with you, then how can anyone really know when you’ve redeemed yourself. So that's why I’m here

W: You wanna see the fireworks?

R: Well maybe not the fireworks but, I mean at least

W: Ceremonial

R: At least when you change er redeem yourself I think it- it's good to have someone there and it's not nice to be alone all the time so…

W: My boy! Ranboo, I knew

R: Yeah!

W: I knew I could trust you. We got the exact same mindset I’m thinking of ahh Ranboo I love what you have done with the burger van

R: Thank you, I’m glad you like it

W: I think this is going to be a beginning of a beautiful partnership,

R: Yeah!

W:beautiful friendship, and maybe when Tubbo comes we can you know have a big party and all get to know each other a bit better.

R: Yeah I can, I can talk with him I think and maybe get him to uh join hopefully

W: Yeah, don’t pressure him. He doesn't have to join, he just needs to come. I just want him to come and see our patented burgers!

R: Yeah!

W: Our burgers, our burger NFTS he needs to come and try them! Ranboo. Thank you man

R: You’re welcome, I’m glad that I could help out a little bit at least.

W: You’re a brilliant man and I'm going to go now a happy man.

R: That's good, I’m glad you’re happy.

W: Thank you Ranboo. Buh Bye. Ah, I love that guy bro!

[mousehole5000]

tgcf again chapters 174-191. im now midway through book 4. pain and suffering. and yet also.... this is really good.... but also.... pain...

okay cave of ten thousand gods everythings coming out into the light.... xie lian pretending not to hear fengqing drop their act im emotional..... fengqing silently working together to separate xie lian and hua cheng im emotional..... every word that comes out of mu qing’s mouth im emotional....

honestly reading the xianle trio discussing hua cheng.. its very hard for me NOT to project all the times ive been in a friendship trio and someone got a boyfriend the other two didnt like (which was every time. theres never been a bf everyone liked. sometimes i was the one who had the bf. there were no winners then and tbh i predict there will be no real winners here as far as this friendship goes but such is life)

mu qing is so smart he’s clever he’s tricksy i love it i love him ugh

“A pair of arms had circled around him from behind, and hugged him with force all of a sudden. Xie Lian had buried his face in his back, and also didn’t speak. Though nothing was said, it was enough.” okay i cant get into every different way im feeling about whats going down bc it would get Too Personal but this..... im emo. also xie lian saying “something like this has to be said clearly“ and then proceeding to not say a word just going in for a hug is a mood

“He heard Hua Cheng’s staggering voice coming from above. “...Your Highness. You really…will be the death of me.” - ok well DONT SAY THAT!! now im worried!!!

“Hua Cheng, however, only snorted, appearing as if his eyes could see through the thick rocky walls. He said darkly, “Don’t worry. If he kills one, I’ll make ten more. Fast and furious like the storms, I will never back down. Let’s see who’s the one left standing in the end.” Xie Lian’s heart skipped a beat for some reason, and he mumbled inwardly, “... Oh no, this is bad.” Even though Hua Cheng’s expression was subconsciously displayed, Xie Lian really was quite weak to this aggressive and rebellious confidence of his.” - fjadskfajsl its okay xie lian honey you never know whats going to do it for you

okay so are the murals and statues are only from the xianle era? im hoping hua cheng didnt secretly follow xie lian during his time as a mortal during the entire 800 years and then pretend to a total stranger that would be too much imo lets see. i still really do get why feng xin and mu qing are like “...dude wtf lets get out of here stay away from that guy” (also tbh probably if theyd all managed to stay close... this probably wouldnt be happening which isnt a judgement im just saying bc thats definitely how ive felt about friendships) although this whole thing IS indeed tinged with homophobia which i still dont think makes sense in this setting but whatever i guess.

BOOK 4!!!! im scared

“A few days ago he nearly fainted, and it was only after that did he realize it was because he hadn’t had anything to eat for several days.” - unfortunately relatable but :(

“Ever since Xie Lian was young, he had never had to consider these kinds of affairs, and this was truly the first time in decades that this problem gripped him. However, if gods didn’t even know what starvation felt like, how could they possibly understand the feelings of a starving worshipper? How could they possibly empathize? At this point, he could only take this experience as a form of training.” - TRUE THO!!!!!!!! i like seeing this even tho the circumstances are sad

wait does xie lian get his bad cooking skills from him mom? im gonna cry...

“After returning to the city, Mu Qing’s stomach was still turning. He said as he stumbled, “I thought…that porridge, it smelled like bran water, but I hadn’t thought it’d taste like it too!” Feng Xin gritted his teeth. “Shut up! Don’t force people to remember that pot of stuff! The queen is…body of ten thousand gold after all…never cooked…this is already…UGH!…” Mu Qing humphed. “Did I say something wrong? If you didn’t think it was like bran water, why don’t you…go ask the queen to grant you another bowl! UGH!…” The two were heaving back and forth, and Xie Lian grabbed hold of the both of them, patting their backs.” - xianle trio.... including simply because it made me do the pleading emoji in real life..... also the way the queen wanted to feed all of them... weeping

i didnt realize that mu qing would still be around during this time.... god the fact that i know theyre all going to split......

“It’s precisely because it’s a time like this that money has to be brought up!” Mu Qing countered. “A time like this? What time is it? Time when we’re starving! It doesn’t matter if you don’t want to admit it, but nothing can be done without money! Can you both not just suck it up a little bit?” - mu qing i love you. god.... for real the fact that he comes from a completely different background than the other two is so important to his character and i think it shows so much in the way he continues to be in the present. he gives me the vibe of someone who is smart and hardworking but is bitter about it and tbh!!!! i get why he is!!! he’s very aware of these kinds of concerns bc he’s had to be, while the other two kind of think theyre above it and its a big difference between them. he’s still separated by the circumstances of his birth despite how much harder he’s worked to get to where he is.... ugh painful and delicious

i really am enjoying the xianle story tbh. xie lian going from his highness, favored by heaven, well-intentioned but lacking in experience and understanding to living in poverty and fighting with mortals who disrespect him. fucking delicious i mean this sincerely and respectfully im sad but i really like his character arc. and then to how he is in the present....

“Mu Qing looked at him, speaking not a word. Then he bowed deeply and really turned around to walk away.” - OH NO ITS HAPPENING AHHHHH ;_; honestly all of this hurts but it feels real like i think mu qing has every right to want to leave honestly and he DOES have other family and other ambitions outside of the trio... and i get why feng xin is mad about him wanting to leave when theyre suffering!! and i get why xie lian lets him go.... friendships are hard man and the pain of them splitting is rough!!!!

“Mu Qing’s departure had really shocked him to the core. First, he had never thought that someone so close would just up and leave. Second, Xie Lian had always believed in “forever”. For example, friends would always be friends forever; no betrayal, no deception, no breaking up. Perhaps there’d be times when they’d part, but it for sure wouldn’t be over reasons like “life is too horrible” - pain. just pain. same as above i get it but it hurts

“Xie Lian didn’t know too well just how much money would be considered normal when buying over ten lanterns, and he never looked at the price tag when he purchased things in the past.” - i feel bad kicking him while he’s down and he’s still trying to be kind even when it costs him but this is the first thing that came into my mind

but also oh?? spirits of soldiers from the battlefield you say?? hmmm i wonder... who.... could possibly be among them....

“If you remain forcibly, you won’t be able to rest in peace,” Xie Lian said. The nameless ghost didn’t seem to care. “I pray to never rest in peace.” -  i cant lie this legit gave me goosebumps lol

“Xie Lian himself was alright in suffering through it, since there were far too many other things to worry about. But his mother, who had lived a comfortable, luxurious life, when had she ever done such crude labour? But if the queen didn’t do this work herself, who else could take over?” - hmmmm!!! housekeeping!!!! it matters!!!! rich people dont appreciate how much until they have to do it themselves!!! but this still makes me sad

oh god THATS when they pawned hongjing?? with the king sick and mu qing leaving?? :(((( even more emotional about its appearances in the present day

“That passerby chuckled. “You don’t know? This is too exciting! The servant is beating the master!” - oh god the dramatic and ironic timing of it all

god..... this is just... a sad time....

“MU QING ISN’T LIKE YOU ALL. HE’S MY FRIEND, HE WOULD NEVER HELP YOU!!!” [cut to] “Those were the only words echoing in Xie Lian’s mind, but he couldn’t utter a single sound, and could only crazily grab at anything at his disposal to throw. He didn’t care who he was hurling at, either. Finally, Mu Qing couldn’t take this anymore, and he steeled his face as he swept his sleeves and left. Xie Lian panted harshly for a bit and fell back down, spacing out again.”- IM SAD!!!!!! tbh i wonder if on some level xie lian kind of felt like mu qing owed him? i know he said to forget about that stuff to both of them but its one thinig to say it and think you mean it and another to have to deal with it

white no-face what is your DEAL!! also all the little fire ghost bits im...

“After having exchanged so many words, Feng Xin finally got the gist of what had transpired. He widened his eyes and pointed at Mu Qing, unable to speak. A moment later, he bent down and grabbed a sack and flung it over, roaring. “SCRAM! SCRAM SCRAM SCRAM!” Mu Qing was hit in the face by the sacks of rice he brought and backed two steps away. All three of them in the house were panting harshly.” - this is it this is the part where i closed my laptop and said “noOOooOOOoooo” out loud to my room im so upset... and mu qing still tried to leave the rice even after the broom thing im ;_;

“Feng Xin was completely convinced that he would never do such a thing, but that was precisely why this had become the worst-case scenario!” - pain, suffering, dismay, etc

“Feng Xin continued, “If Your Highness thinks your life might be in danger, I can finish this for you, I won’t tell Her Majesty, haha.” - bless your heart for trying feng xin

“But it shouldn’t be like this. The Feng Xin of the past would have absolute faith in him no matter what! Even if there was only twenty percent doubt, it was still unbearable!” - AHHHHHHH okay idk if i really have much to say about their relationship other than im sad but IM SAD!!!!

the differences between feng xin and mu qing’s relationship with xie lian are so interesting. feng xin has clearly always idolized xie lian a lot while mu qing hasnt at least not in the same way and he seems like he has some resentment towards xie lian (thats how i read it anyway thats what i said about it at the beginning of book 2 and i think its understandable and can be a very real part of friendships) that feng xin doesnt and i just think thats neat!!

“He was firmly tied down upon the altar, that broken base of the statue under his body. There were many people squeezed below the altar, and pair after pair of round, unblinking eyes were watching him.” - hmmm dont think i like where this is going

“Yet, before he could finish, he realized that the white silk that he used to cover his face had been undone. In this moment, the thing that had him completely tied down was that exact white silk.” oh my god wait is this ruoye?? is ruoye that same ribbon???? ill cry

“The hand stained with blood, the one that ended a life, was immune to the Face Disease.” - ohhh shit okay. okay okay. okay. shit okay. i See now.... so if youre an innocent civilian the only way to escape this fate (and the faces are actually the souls of other innocent civilians) is to get rid of your innocence... and doesnt this disease not actually hurt its just horrific? god.............

“White No-Face pitied, “You think they don’t want to do it? Wrong, it’s not that they don’t want to, it’s solely because no one wants to be the first, that’s all.” - shut up!!! youre the one who created this situation dont fucking preach about the way you think the world is

“He forced down the mouthful of blood and hissed, “What are you laughing at? You think that you got what you wanted? This was all forced by you!” The ghost fire within the ghost’s hand flickered even more fiercely.” - yes exactly!!! you put people in extreme circumstances sometimes they do extreme things!! youve proved nothing!! god i do love when characters say exactly what im thinking. plus the first ones who caved were trying to save their child

“He felt that, if he was to let them do what they wanted, there was something in his heart that would never return to its original state.” - :( also i kind of feel that in my life sometimes and i just hope xie lian’s heart ends up in a state he’s happy with

“He didn’t dare to look at what had become of the person lying on the altar, because what laid there didn’t look human anymore.” AHHHHHH!!! :(((( i mean i get why this event is what made hc... level up??? thats not a good way to describe it fjasldkfjaslk but you know what i mean... that line about being powerless to help your beloved OOOOOOF

okay well finished that chapter im. pain. hmmm. pain. i dont know if i actually have any words rn lol but im gonna stop here for now

[barnesandrogersfanfics]

Baby Love -Part 7

Pairing: Chris Evans x Reader

A/N - This is kind of a filler Chapter....

"Hey babe?... didnt you hear me?" Chris asked suddenly appearing in my bedroom doorway, i put my phone on the bed as i quickly wiped my eyes and walked over to my bathroom.

"Sorry, must have spaced"

"You okay?"

"Yeah I'm fine"

"So why are you crying?"

"Pregnancy hormones i guess" i mumbled as i splashed my face with water.

"Nothing to do with this shit on Twitter then?" He asked as i was patting my face dry, i looked up to see him standing there holding up my phone that still had the Twitter page up, i shrugged reaching for the phone but he held it out of my reach.

"Nope, no more of this. You dont need to be reading this shit, look at how upset you are!"

"Their right though, you could do so much better!"

"Please dont start saying that, there is no one better for me. You are it for me, your gonna be the mother of my kid" he said pulling me into his arms and holding me tight.

"Maybe we should just delete all social media accounts, i dont want to be seeing these comments either"

"That will just anger your fans even more, don't worry i'll be okay" i reached up and pressed my lips to his, my hands slipping under his tshirt and stroking his back.

"lets go home, we'll turn our phones off and just go to bed... i think we should stay there for the weekend" he smirked wiggling his eyebrows at me making me laugh.

"Thats the best idea you ever had"

"No, the best idea i ever had was suggesting that i be your sperm doner. This has got to be the second best though right?"

"Your such a dork Evans!" I laughed "come on lets go".

The weekend was spent in bed as Chris had suggested, watching movies and catching up on TV shows we wanted to see. Both of our phones switched off and no interruptions, It was the most relaxed id felt in ages.

I was currently laying in bed dozing with Dodger curled up next to me as an old rerun of 'Friends' was playing in the background. Arms wrapping around me me woke me up and i smiled as Chris buried his face against my neck.

"Wake up.... dinner will be ready soon"

"Im awake" i mumbled "sorry i didn't mean to fall asleep. I just feel exhausted, i think you've worn me out Evans"

"I didn't hear you complaining" he teased as his hand slipped under my tshirt and cupped my breast. I hissed and pulled away from him "ow!"

"What?! What did i do?" He sat back in shock looking like id slapped him in the face.

"Nothing baby, it wasn't you... my boobs are really sensitive! Ow... maybe keep your hands off the goods for a little while" i pouted "pregnancy sucks! First the sickness, then the sore boobs...."

"Im looking forward to the part when your super horny all the time" he laughed climbing off the bed and holding a hand out to help me up.

"Haha you would!"

Dinner was a simple pasta dish (nothing fancy with this guy i tell ya!) but it was so good!! Yes i went back for seconds don't judge me im eating for two!

"I sorted out the movers while dinner was cooking, their gonna be at your old place Wednesday that gives us the next two days to get you packed up"

"Is that gonna be enough time?? I have loads of crap you know?"

"It'll be fine, a lot of it you can put in storage"

"I'll probably only really need my clothes,  we dont want my crap laying around. We need to have plenty of room for when the baby comes. Besides youve got everything we're gonna need"

"Just remember this is your home too now, you can have whatever you want in here"

"Thank you baby, but i like it as it is"

"I feel like its missing something though, your place was always so cozy..."

"A woman's touch is all it needs"

"It feels better already just having you here".

He was right, it was enough time. I was soon packed up and moved into my new home with Chris and Dodger. We'd been so busy i didn't even have time to think about all the online stuff that was stressing me out before.

The weeks were flying by so quickly! I was now in my second trimester and it was the best id felt since being pregnant. The sickness was gone and i had been experiencing that horny stage Chris had been looking forward to so much.

I was currently sat on the sofa with Dodger looking through a book of baby names, Chris had been out all morning running errands but we were due at the doctors in a few hours for our 18 week scan.... today was the day we'd find out the sex! It was exciting but i was full of nerves!

"Hey babe!" Chris called as he came through the front door, Dodger looked up but didn't leave my side, he'd become very protective of me lately and was always by my side.

"Still no hello Bud?" I heard Chris say and chuckled to myself "you looking after your mama huh?"

"Protective just like his daddy" i smiled finally looking up from the book, my eyes went wide when i looked at Chris....his hair was shorter and his beard trimmed shorter.

"Wow"

"Does it look okay?"

"Fuck yeah!.... you know i love your hair that bit longer but this is working for you Evans" i wiggled my eyebrows at him.

"Glad you approve, i had to have a tidy up Ive got the Premiere on Monday"

"I know, i haven't forgotten"

"And your still okay coming with me?"

"Yeah, cant hide away forever can we" i said looking him up and down, he was wearing blue jeans and tight fitting white t-shirt and i couldn't help but wanna climb him like a damn tree!

"Stop looking at me like that, i know that look and we don't have time!"

"We can be quick!...."

"Nope, come on! Get your sexy ass off that couch and lets go. I promise i will make it up to you when we get home"

"Fine!" I huffed holding my arms out to him to help me up, he shook his head but smiled as he pulled me off the couch, i quickly reached up and kissed him before he could let me go.

"Thats not fair...."

"Sorry i couldn't help myself, lets go then" i laughed walking away from him and grabbing my purse and oversized sweater to hide my small bump i now had “lets go see our baby”.

Baby love tags: @jennmurawski13 @mybabyboytony

@ms-betsy-fangirl @vampgirl1997 @ajosieface

@afuckingshituniverse @chmedic @esoltis280

@southerngracela @bethabear12 @letsdisneythings

@sellulii @patzammit @katiew1973 @princess-evans-addict @deidrahouseofpain @siren-queen03

@shipatheart

[silverandarsenic-hcs]

Ghost BC x Bipolar Disorder

disclaimer: everyone with bipolar deals with it differently, has different symptoms, different levels, and different coping mechanisms. im just speaking from experience here cause im just not dealing with it all right now!!! wooohoo!!! ive never talked about this so if you want me to add anyone let me know. 

If hearing about mania/manic states and depressive episodes could trigger you or worsen your mental health, please don’t keep reading. all triggers in the tags as usual. also im doing it as You and not I or “their s/o” for nothing but formatting reasons and laziness. questions and concerns may be as usual directed to the confessional (ask box)

Papa II: It’s kind of difficult with him. He understands the episodes, and that sometimes you can just have regular ups and downs, and that it’s not 100% all the time. He gets depression to a certain extent too. those days you don’t want to get out of bed, don’t have the energy to cry, don’t have the energy to blink so you just let your eyes burn. and when youre up, it’s self destruction, intrusive thoughts, the screaming, the energy. Everything just feels like it’s going too fast, whether you know you’re having an episode or not. II is really good at helping you navigate your episodes. He wont push you to calm down, or tell you to “just be happy” when youre up and down. He’s good at helping things feel real. Helping you come down inside enough that you can recognize yourself in the mirror. Whether you don’t believe in medication, or went off it, or it isn’t working for you, he’ll support you no matter what and never think you’re crazy or awful or manipulating him. He knows you cant control it. 

Papa III: He tries to understand, he really does, but theres so many hard stigmas about bipolar that are hard to let go. That it’s day to day, or hour to hour moods instead of episodes that can last a few days to a few weeks. He knows it’s not his fault, but seeing you talk faster than your brain can process your words, your bursts of manic energy where you just wanna run and your bad ideas, knowing whats going on in your head, it makes him feel useless knowing theres nothing he can do to help you. All he can try to do is talk you off the ledge when you’re about to do something Not Great, and make sure to keep communication open so that if you feel an episode coming on you can try and find ways to stop it together. when you’re depressed, he tries the classic stuff to make you smile: movies, warm blankets, cuddling, forehead kisses, whatever fluff ive put in these hcs before. but it doesn’t work. it cant possibly work when you can’t stop crying and don’t even want him around. and thats a hard pill to swallow - hard to really understand its not him you don’t want around, it’s just that you don’t want anyone around. His best suggestion is to talk to a therapist because he never wants to give you any bad ideas, or bad coping mechanisms, or say something that could trigger an episode, and it’s hard for him to really understand where those lines are if theyre changing all the time (and they usually are). 

Dewdrop: he’ll vibe with you. he doesn’t really understand what you’re going through in any capacity, and why its such a bad thing when you have energy, but whatever you wanna do he’ll do it with you. if you’re manic, he’ll probably try to get on your level - and hear me out, i know this is a dangerous game and AWFUL for someone to do when you’re manic, but listen. If he tries to get on your level when you’re Up, it’s easier for him to understand what you’re thinking. If you tell him something kinda crazy you wanna do when he’s coolin, of course it’s gonna sound crazy and a bad idea and he’ll try and stop you - but that doesn’t get the Crazy out. if he’s up, he can better judge what’s a fun little reckless thing to do vs what’s actually dangerous and what to keep you away from. And he’s good at distracting. Good at steering your constantly crashing train of thought. When you’re in a depressive state, he’ll just lay there with you. he won’t try and talk it out of you, or suggest you do something fun, or tell you how everything's gonna be okay. he doesnt know that for sure and he’s not going to lie to you. but he’s figured out the more still and quiet he is when you’re down like that, the less likely you are to try and kick him out or push him away. The more he rides those waves with you the more he can understand what you’re going through, and learn about what your lines and triggers are. 

Swiss: okay i havent talked about this that much on this account (its a big part of my book haha please read it) but Swiss is Smart. like ridiculously book smart, math smart, people smart, street smart. once hes been around you for long enough, he’s sometimes better at noticing the signs of an episode before you do. He’s really perceptive when it comes to the tone of your voice, little ticks, what you’re saying, how you’re dressing. You know he’s paying attention, but he does it in a way that doesn't make you feel like you’re being watched or monitored ever. everyone knows thats fucking annoying and feels invasive as hell. When you’re manic he’s good at helping you get back to a place of center. not calm, or back to normal, but centered. grounded. it’s hard to feel like you even Exist in the same world as other people sometimes and he gets that. definitely watches how much time you spend online, cause that can make the Not Existing feeling a lot worse. When you’re low, he’s good at talking to you. he’ll direct the conversation to and from whatever you’re upset about if anything, in a way that doesn’t feel invasive or like pestering. if you dont wanna talk about whatever's wrong (and lets be honest, sometimes its Nothing) then he’ll get you to talk about something. Anything just to keep you talking. The goal isn’t to make you laugh and smile, maybe its just to make you feel less alone in the world, but if you do laugh and smile that’s just a cherry on top. 

- Kat

disclaimer part two: there are no excuses mental illness or otherwise for treating your partner poorly and putting someone who cares about you (anyone, really) through hell just because they’ll take it or because you wont seek help isnt okay.

[moon-yeongjun]

“Tae-yah, I love you, but this is a stupid dream.” || Moon Bros

Summary: June 5-- Tae asks for permission to get a nipple piercing and then wants boy and friend advice, thus torturing Jun. This is very funny. 

@moon-yeongtae

Tae: hey so would u ever sign a paper so I could get my nipples pierced and not tell eomma?

Jun: what the hell

Jun: why would you want to do something so absurd

Tae: bc it looks cool?

Jun: aiya

Jun: look i dont think that is something we could hide from eomma for forever

Jun: cant you just wait a year and a half you'll be 18

Jun: then you can do whatever horrible body mutilation to yourself that you want

Tae: maybe

Tae: but if I really wanted to you'd sign it right?

Tae: :)

Jun: i dont think so

Jun: i am not going to go behind eomma's back

Jun: then you'll get me in trouble

Tae: :(

Tae: i could tell her I forged ur signature if she found out

Jun: no

Jun: this is a waste of your money anyway

Jun: if you still want it at 18 then you get it then

Tae: my friends are gonna get piercings

Tae: all three of them

Jun: oh u going to buy drugs if all your friends buy drugs

Tae: no

Tae: but I also don't want drugs

Jun: well why do u want nipple piercings anyway are you trying to be a pirate eh

Jun: a drug lord

Tae: maybe

Tae: im actually starting my own biker gang

Jun: all the more reason for me to say no

Tae: why can't u support my dreams hyung

Jun: tae yah i love you

Jun: but this is a stupid dream

Tae: wow

Jun: someone needs to tell you

Jun: that someone is me

Tae [hours later]: Hyung

Tae: on a scale from 1 to 10, 1 being u actually like it and 10 being u want to shoot urself in the face

Tae: how do u feel about me talking to u about boys

Jun [deleted]: 씨-발

Jun: a 5

Tae: ok so like an 8

Jun: i said a 5 didnt i

Tae: 5 means u have no feeling one way or the other lmfao that's impossible u have an opinion about everything

Jun: if you tell me you want to get your nipples pierced for a boy i am at a 10 how about that

Tae: haha no that would be just for me ;)

Jun: right

Jun: the answer to that is still no

Tae: no i was actually going to talk about how i'm never going to date anyone in my whole life and i might as well become a monk

Jun: oh well personally i think that is a good life decision

Jun: monks are well respected

Jun: i am also probably going to become a monk

Tae: yeah why don't u get laid more tbh

Tae: all my friends talk about how hot u r so i mean u probably look alright

Jun: i am now at a 7

Jun: we're not supposed to be talking about my sex life

Jun [deleted]: also you should get new friends they are not allowed to come over anymore IN WITH THE NEW OUT WITH THE STUPID

Tae: ugh

Tae: im depressed

Jun: okay

Jun: because you think you're never going to date?

Tae: no

Tae: bc i can't date nemo

Jun: why not

Jun: he likes boys too

Jun: does he not like you?

Tae: apparently louie had a crush on me this whole time

Tae: and thinks we are assholes

Jun: oh wait im remembering this

Jun: we did talk about it

Tae: yes

Tae: and like

Jun: i told you to tell him to shut up

Tae: he's just now starting to talk to us again

Jun [deleted]: first of all i cant believe you have so many gay friends is everyone just gay now

Tae: and nemo is a really good person and cares

Tae: about louie's feelings

Jun: so you'er saying he wont date you because he does not want to upset his other friend

Tae: yea

Jun: im not really sure what you want from me here i dont really do relationship advice

Tae: ok

Jun: it seems to be that louie is being selfish and you should just date

Jun: right? is that crazy?

Jun: and if he is going to not talk to you well he is a terrible friend anyway good riddance

Tae: that's a little bit how i feel

Tae: i also see nemo's side

Tae: but the longer it goes on

Tae: the more i just really don't give a fuck what louie says

Jun: you shouldnt give a fuck about him but i guess you should care what nemo says since he still has to agree to date you

Tae: u said fuck lmao

Jun: ive said fuck many times before

Tae: yeah but i was expecting u to yell at me about my language lol

Tae: anyway

Tae: i want to kick louie in the mouth and date nemo

Tae: and im depressed bc i can't do that

Tae: bc i really really like him

Tae: a lot

Tae: so much

Jun [deleted]: well thats nice... no what the fuck do u say to someon

Jun: ah well im sorry tae yah that your friends are both equally stupid for different reasons

Tae: im moving to texas

Tae: that's like one of the only states i know

Jun: i hear things are worse there

Jun: you should move to new york thats where everyone goes

Jun: personally would hate it but

Jun: i dunno, lots of gay people are there

Tae: like city?

Jun: yes sure

Tae: that shit is too big

Jun: aiya now i will yell at you for your language

Tae: can i stay home from school tomorrow lmao

Jun: what? no

Jun: there is no good erason for you to miss school

Tae: it's to stop me from killing a skinny white boy

Jun: not good enough your education is most important

Jun: a little murder never hurt anyone

Jun: but missing school? terrible tragedy

Tae: except the dead guy

Jun: well in a way you're doing him a favour if you think about it

Jun: he doesnt have to go to school anymore

Jun: but you do

Tae: omg

Tae: that's a good reason to keep him alive i guess

Tae: so he has to suffer

Jun: there we go

Jun: other ways to get revenge

Tae: he's being such a little bitch baby too

Tae: UGH

Jun: yes just get it out 

now

Tae: did u know he's not even looking at me

Tae: like he won't

Tae: he looks off to the side and like doesn't speak actual words to me

Tae: he will text when we are in a group and acknowledge me there

Tae: that's it

Jun: thats very immature

Jun: weird way to treat a crush if u want them to like u back too but thats neither here nor there

Tae: what he is basically doing is making sure i will never like him back probably bc why would i like someone who can't like

Tae: talk about what is bothering them

Tae: and instead ignores me

Jun: well i dont know i definitely wouldnt

Tae: and like we have talked about it

Tae: but he basically said i was a dick and i should leave him alone

Tae: so the whole thing  pisses me off i hate it

Jun: well maybe you should

Jun: let him get over it or whatever

Tae: i am

Tae: im not being pushy it just sUCKS

Jun: well i saw a lot of people in my year date and break up over and over

Jun: the good thing is he will get over it and you will all forget about it

Jun: then you and nemo can date if thats what you want

Tae: yeah

Tae: when u come home can u bring some nectarines

Jun: what am i a delivery boy

Jun [deleted]: yes yeong junnie

Jun: fine

Tae: thank u hyungie