#i just want people to be safe when following me and i dont find those kinds of interactions of followers and dom blogs on here to be very

[bigothteddies]

you’re a god to me i might end up writing teddy on my body even though you won’t see it 😣

honestly nothing makes me happier than seeing my name on the people I love’s bodies 😵‍💫🫶🏻

[girasollake]

everything i wanted

ꨄpairing: neteyam x fem!omaticaya!reader / jake sully x reader(platonic)

ꨄrequested: no

ꨄtype: mostly angst, some fluff

ꨄsummary: you always wanted to feel appreciated, neteyam always wanted to be the best warrior; in short: u seek validation in older men cause you dont have family and because you are the best warrior, neteyam is jealous of you, the whole fic roughly follows the plot of atwow!!! ummmm kinda enemies to lovers?????

ꨄwarnings: SPOILERS AHEAD, DONT READ IF U HAVENT SEEN ATWOW, mentions of being shot, angst, my bad writing cause i havent written anything since september, reader is a year older than neteyam

ꨄa/n: i feel like this is so bad i am sorry

ꨄword count: 3,402

‘How could you both be so stupid?’ You threw your hands in the air and shot a glare at Neteyam. ‘You could’ve died! Does that mean nothing to you? Your father explicitly told you to observe, not engage! You are like a child Neteyam, both you and Lo’ak!’

‘I wanted to stop him, he’s just too disobedient.’ He avoided your eyes.

‘And you had to take the blame again? He’s never going to learn if you keep doing that.’ You shook your head and sighed.

‘Can you stop? I’m the oldest and I need to protect my siblings.’

‘No. No, Neteyam. I am the oldest. I may not be your sibling but I am the oldest and, believe it or not, I wouldn’t forgive myself if anything happened to them.’

Especially you.

‘You can protect them, be a big brother, but don’t take credit for every stupid thing they do!’ You moved closer to him and snapped your fingers in front of his face to get his attention. ‘I know you want to prove your father you can be a warrior, but it doesn’t mean that you have to put your life at risk when Lo’ak does something stupid.’ You huffed. ‘Just be careful next time.’

Neteyam felt jealous of you, of the way his father trusted you enough to put you in risky missions because he knew you would survive, of the way he praised your fighting skills and of the way he put you on a pedestal. You were born during the first war with the sky people and both of your parents had died fighting. The clan surrounded you with love when you were growing up, but you had never had anyone to call a mother or a father. You were just an orphan trying to find a place alongside everyone that you crossed paths with. So, when Neteyam was jealous of you having his father approval and trust, you were jealous of him for having a real family. When you were younger you would hide behind the trees and watch them cuddle underneath the night sky, your little heart breaking and longing for this kind of comfort and love. Even though you were Omatikaya by blood you still sometimes felt like an outsider. You occupied your time with training, flying, shooting arrows and that’s why Jake was impressed, that’s why you were one of his favorite warriors and he knew he could trust you. He even got you your own gun, which Neteyam and Lo’ak were especially jealous of.

Deep down you knew what this was about. Jake cared about you, but not like he cared about his own children. That was the real reason you were sent on those missions, the reason he took you everywhere with him on fights. He just didn’t want to risk his sons life's. You knew that and you still took part in everything because those were the moments when you felt like you belong.

° 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ₒ 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 °

‘Can we talk?’ Jake asked from behind you.

‘Of course, sir.’ You nodded your head and stopped sharpening the spears.

He sat down next to you and sighed.

‘We are leaving tomorrow.’ He said firmly. ‘This is not a safe place for my family anymore.’

‘Oh, I see.’ You whispered, a wave of sadness ran through your whole body.

‘I want you to come with us.’ Your ear twitched and you looked up at him with hopeful eyes. ‘And I want you to promise me you will protect my children when I won’t be able to do it myself.’

‘I promise.’ You answered quickly. ‘I’ll do my best, sir.’

He smiled at you and stood up, ‘Tomorrow after the ceremony. Be ready.’ He shot you one last glance and walked away.

The next day you were waiting for the Sully family by the ikrans, your thoughts were interrupted by a loud shriek of Tuk.

‘Are you coming with us (Y/n)?’ She asked after she ran up to you.

‘I am.’ You smiled at her and after giving you a hug she ran back to her mom in order to get on an ikran with her.

While you were checking your bags attached to your own animal, you felt someone intensely staring at the back of your head. You didn’t have to turn around to know it was Neteyam. You never knew why he gave you those weird glances, a part of you wished they weren’t that hateful. At first you tried being friends with him, but after a while his behavior towards you had changed. While you were getting along with his younger siblings, he was always staying away from you, watching your every move. The relationship between you felt like some sort of rivalry, but there was always this warm feeling you couldn’t shake off when you knew he was nearby.

After a long, tiring flight to the Metkayina clan you were exhausted, the thought of laying down was the only one in your head. You made the appropriate gesture towards the Tsahik and the Olo’eyktan when they arrived and you suddenly felt really small under Ronal’s gaze. She started walking around you all, examining your tails and postures.

‘Is this also your child, Jakesully?’ She asked, you could feel her judging eyes on you.

‘No. She’s not my child, but she is the best warrior in our clan and she is important to my family.’

‘Is that true?’ She moved to look into your eyes.

‘Yes, Tsahik Ronal.’ You gave her a long nod and felt the warm feeling spreading in your heart after hearing that you were important to the Sully’s.

She whispered something to herself and went back to her husband who a moment later agreed that all of you could stay with them. You smiled to yourself when you were walking through the village following Tsireya, everything felt so fresh and untouched by war, those people didn’t live in fear unlike your clan. You dropped your belongings on the floor and went over to Neytiri to help her.

‘It’s okay, you can go with others and learn the Metkayina ways, I can handle the unpacking.’ She told you and put her hand on your arm.

‘Are you sure?’

‘Yes, go.’ She smiled sweetly and playfully pushed you towards the exit of your new home.

You ran towards the shore and started looking for your friends. When you finally spotted them you quickly jumped into the water and swam quickly in their direction.

‘Can I join?’ You asked Tsireya when you emerged from the water.

‘Of course!’ She gave you a smile. ‘Follow us everyone.’

After swimming for a while she took all of you to meet the ilu’s and learn how to ride them. You were scared of failure, especially after seeing how fast Lo’ak let go of his ilu. Tsireya helped you get on the animal and told you that you’re gonna be okay, you just have to hold it tight.

‘How could she not be fine? She’s the best warrior after all.’ Neteyam muttered with annoyance.

‘Stop it.’ Kiri smacked his arm.

‘What? She shouldn’t be here, her place is with the clan. I don’t even get why she’s here with us in the first place.’

‘It’s not my fault your dad values my skills more than he does yours.’ You replied harshly and then without a second thought told your ilu in your mind to go forward.

You felt angry at Neteyam, rage was filling your body. You were the best for a reason and you would prove that to him. You tightened your grip on the handle attached to the animal’s body and took the biggest breath in your life before diving into the depths of the ocean. The speed was horrible and you felt your hand slowly relaxing.

No. I won’t give him the satisfaction.

You tightened your fist and held the handle even harder than before. After readjusting your position and squeezing your thighs to feel more steady you felt the oxygen slowly leaving your lungs. You shut your eyes and rode upwards, soon emerging from the water and jumping with your ilu only to dive again. You rode over to your friends and smiled at Tsireya. Everyone was impressed, because this was your first try and it definitely required special skills to get it this perfect. Annoyance was written on Neteyam’s face, he scoffed and started swimming away. You sighed and got off the ilu.

‘Neteyam, wait!’ You screamed and swam towards him.

He didn’t even look back and you reached him after you both got out of the water.

‘Neteyam, what happened?’ You touched his arm and he immediately turned around to face you.

‘You happened.’ He scoffed. ‘I am tired of you taking my place all the time. I try so hard to meet my dad’s standards and it’s never appreciated because of you!’

‘It’s not my fau-‘

‘It is. It is your fault.’ He interrupted your sentence and walked away quickly.

And there it was again. The feeling of loneliness consumed you once again, when the boy you adored walked away feeling only hatred towards you. Sure, you were often picking fights with him, replying to his comments with the same energy, but maybe this time you really did take it too far?

° 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ₒ 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 °

You were helping Tsireya with some of the duties one day and Neteyam was far from you, but still in your sight. You were stealing quick glances at him so that your friend wouldn’t see it, when suddenly he quickly swam away and you couldn’t see him anymore. You excused yourself and left Tsireya by herself to go and see what had happened that made him go that fast. The closer you got to the direction he swam towards, the better you heard voices screaming and sounds of fighting. You came over to Kiri, she was softly laughing at the pile of boys in front of her. You had to admit it was funny, but at the same time you were all supposed to be on your best behavior. Because of that, you walked over to them and hissed loudly, their heads turning to face you.

‘Enough.’ You spat and looked over at Lo’ak and Neteyam. ‘Both of you.’

They stood up and walked towards Kiri, you hissed at the Metkayina boys once again and turned around to join the Sully’s.

‘It was going well, you didn’t have to-‘

‘Was it, Lo’ak?’ You stopped and looked at him. ‘You were supposed to be on your best behavior, what were you thinking?’ You turned to the older boy.

He didn’t reply to you, he just took his brother by his arm and walked away.

‘You are both unbelievable.’ Kiri whispered making you turn your head in her direction.

‘What do you mean?’

‘Just tell him you like him already.’ She whined.

‘You know I can’t.’ A sigh escaped your lips. ‘He hates me, Kiri. He sees me as a rival, he despises me.’

‘He doesn’t.’

‘He does.’ You said louder. ‘I don’t want to talk about it anymore, let’s go.’

‘Lo’ak was the one that started that fight, he was just helping him.’

‘I know.’ You replied and looked down, soon arriving at your home.

‘And you? Why weren’t you keeping an eye on them?’ Jake turned to you when you entered the shack.

‘I’m sorry, I was helping Tsireya.’ You avoided his gaze. ‘Next time I won’t let anything happen to them.’

And you were right.

You jumped down from your ikran and landed on the sky people’s ship. Neteyam found his way to his siblings and Tsireya as fast as you, jumping onto the deck from his ilu. You shot your arrows towards some sky people coming towards you.

‘Cut the handcuffs!’ You told him when he reached you.

‘Come on, bro. Hurry up!’ Lo’ak screamed at his brother.

You turned around and saw Tsireya and Tuk jumping into the water, ‘Go! Both of you!’ You yelled at the brothers.

Neteyam started dragging the boy away, ‘They have Spider! We have to help him!’ Lo’ak tugged on his brother’s arm.

You locked your eyes with Neteyam, ‘Shit!’ He hissed. ‘Okay, let’s go.’

‘No, you are not going anywhere.’ You stopped both of them. ‘Go back to your father, right now.’

‘We have to help Spider, please (Y/n).’ Lo’ak looked at you with terrified eyes.

‘UGH!’ You shook your head and hang your bow on your body. ‘Just stay close.’ You told them and ran towards the inside of the ship.

You were quietly moving on the big pipe on the ceiling when some people started walking your way, Spider was surrounded by them in a circle. All three of you jumped down at the people and freed your friend, but then a pure moment of joy was interrupted by gunshots firing your way.

‘Go! Go!’ You screamed and pushed the boys towards a wall that would hide all of you.

Neteyam snatched the gun from Lo’ak and started shooting at the enemies, you pulled out the gun Jake had gifted you and helped him.

‘I’ll tell you when to jump and you jump!’ You shouted and looked over at them, they were rapidly nodding their heads. You gave a few more shots towards the enemies and took a deep breath. ‘Now!’

Lo’ak and Spider jumped quickly into the water, you pushed Neteyam first and jumped as the last person. For a second you felt relief when you heard their happy screams, but it was washed away when you started struggling with keeping your head above the water. Adrenaline started coming down and you felt your lower abdomen on fire.

‘Yes! We did it bro!’ Lo’ak hugged his brother who was laughing softly.

‘Come on! We need to go!’ Neteyam yelled when Tsireya came up from the water riding her ilu.

‘Nete…Neteyam…’ You coughed.

His smile faded and he rapidly swam towards you.

‘I’m shot you skxawng.’

‘Shit! Shit!’ He cursed. ‘Just hold on a second!’ He held you tightly and sat you down on the ilu. ‘It’s okay, just hold on.’ His panicked voice echoed through your ears.

He saw his father standing on a rock and everyone started screaming for him. A worried expression came up on his face when he saw his son holding you tightly.

‘She’s shot, dad, help her!’ They started pulling you up to rest you on the wet rock.

Jake inspected your body only to see a big wound on your lower stomach which was quickly bleeding out.

‘Take her to the village, right now.’ He told Neteyam and helped put you on the animal again.

Neteyam held you in his arms as he tried to ride the animal as quickly as he could without causing more damage to you.

‘Hold on, okay? Don’t you dare die on me!’ He yelled to you.

‘But I am so sleepy, Nete..’ Your voice was weak, but he still heard you.

‘No, don’t sleep, we’re right there, just…Just hold on..’ He finally saw the village and hope filled him up. ‘We’re here, it’s okay. It’s gonna be okay.’ He looked down at you to check if your eyes were still open and he saw you slowly blinking. ‘HELP! I NEED HELP!’ He screamed as loud as he could which caught the attention of some people by the coast, they quickly ran to get the Tsahik who was helping other wounded warriors.

‘Neteyam..’ You coughed.

‘We’re here, hold on for me.’ He looked down at you again.

‘I see…’ Your voice was getting weaker. ‘I see you, Neteyam.’ You whispered and closed your eyes.

‘No. No, no, no. Help! I need the Tsahik!’ He got off the ilu holding your limp body in his arms.

Ronal emerged from behind the people and told him to put you in one of the shacks. The Tsahik pushed him outside and covered the entrance with a curtain made out of big leaves and seaweed. Neteyam finally felt the tears on his face which previously were washed away by the splashing water. He didn’t know what to do, fear, sadness and adrenaline were running through his body. He waited for what felt like hours and when he felt Tuk’s arms around him all of a sudden he felt safe. His whole family was okay and when he came eye to eye with his father, he broke down crying again. Jake hugged his son and caressed his hair with his hand. A sudden rustle made Neteyam break the comforting hug. Everyone turned towards the sound, Ronal was standing in front of the shack, her expression was unreadable. She locked eyes with Neteyam.

‘She’s alive. Barely.’ She stated.

‘Thank you, Great Mother.’ Kiri whispered and hugged her brother from the side.

‘She needs a lot of rest and I am not certain if she will survive the night.’ Ronal said and started walking away. ‘Do not bother her. Now it is all up to Eywa.’

° 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 ₒ 𐐪𐑂 ♡ 𐐪𐑂 °

Your nostrils were filled with a disgusting smell which made you slowly open your eyes. You saw Ronal putting some type of paste on your wound and you hissed.

‘I guess this means I’m not dead.’ You whispered, your voice hoarse.

‘No, but it was close.’ She replied and wrapped some bandages around your stomach. ‘Rest, my child.’ She whispered and walked out, leaving you alone once again.

After a while the silence was interrupted by Jake, ‘Hi.’ He said as he sat down next to you.

‘I told you I’d keep them safe.’ You weakly smiled at him and he let out a soft laugh.

‘Yeah, I knew you would.’ His smile quickly faded. ‘I.. I wanted to thank you. For protecting them. And I’m sorry for using you so much, on all of those fights… I forget that you are still young, god… You’re only a year older than Neteyam and I’ve never thought something like this would happen to you…’ He paused. ‘You have a whole life in front of you, I’m sorry for trying to take that away and not protecting you.’

‘It’s okay.’ You whispered. ‘I know you only wanted to keep your family safe.’

He nodded and stood up, a tear fell down his cheek. He looked like he wanted to say something more, but nothing came out, he gave you one last smile and walked outside. After a while you closed your eyes because the light started bothering you, but you immediately opened them when you felt someone put their hand in yours. You looked at the way your fingers were intertwined with Neteyam’s and gave him a soft smile.

‘I’m so sorry.’ He whispered.

‘You have nothing to be sorry about.’ You coughed out.

‘I have. I am sorry for getting angry at you, for getting jealous about my father and for..’

‘Hey, it’s okay.’ You whispered and stroked his hand with your thumb. ‘And I’m sorry too, I shouldn’t be taking your place by your dad’s side.’

He nodded and squeezed your hand, ‘It’s okay, I know you just wanted someone to be proud of you. Kiri told me how… How you feel like an outsider all the time, because you don’t have…’

‘Parents?’

‘Yeah.’ He looked down at the floor.

‘After all these years I got used to having no one, but when your dad and other warriors from the clan were so proud of me… I just felt this hapiness that I finally belong somewhere, that’s why I always wanted to be the best…I’m sorry again, Neteyam.’

‘I forgive you.’ He smiled. ‘I can’t believe you were ready to die for me.’ He softly laughed and you reciprocated the smile.

‘I can.’ You whispered. ‘And I forgive you too, for being so mean to me.’ Your smile grew wider. ‘But you were cute when you were angry.’

‘Is that so?’ You gave him a long nod. ‘And now I’m not?’

‘No.’

‘Liar.’

Your giggles filled up the space around you and you didn’t even notice when he got so close to your face. You felt his breath on your skin and he put his other hand on your cheek.

‘I always thought you hated me.’ You whispered into his lips.

‘Do you still think that?’

‘No.’ It left your lips more like a breath rather than a word.

He finally closed the gap between you and it all just felt right. His lips on yours felt so right. You finally felt like you were not alone.

‘I see you, (Y/n).’

likes and reblogs are appreciated<3

taglist: @neteyamsgirl @vviolaswrld

[syoddeye]

ill-advised

simon x f! reader | 1165 words cw: simon being a gross creep, terrible advice, slimy internet culture, bad usernames, unsolicited nudes a/n: wrote this silly thing on my phone. lightly edited. been thinking about how simon would be the world's worst agony uncle. enjoy a few easter eggs.

Simon doesn’t have a God complex. No. He leaves that to the Simulation 5 streamers who build complicated dungeons beneath their character’s cottages, forcing others to labor on paintings or crochet projects to sell and support their captor’s livelihood. Not that he…watches those. No, no. He’s simply seen more than his fair share of depravity. Some of it at his expense, some at others, and more than a chunk of it dealt by his own two hands. He knows how the world works. How people work. He knows his shit, plain and simple.

So when his schedule allows, he logs on after midnight. His username and password are two alphanumeric strings, but people recognize the cluster of digits and letters. Wait for his comments. Follow his account. Send him stupid digital gifts, some useless currency to dress up his default icon. The amount increases daily, as does his following. His own little cult.

He doesn’t care about the numbers. Not really. He just loves dishing out his honest opinion, and nobody’s safe.

AN [Advice Needed] Family forgot to invite me on a trip, expect me to go last minute Hi, it’s like the title says. I (25 M) live across the country from my parents, siblings (all all adults), nieces, and nephews. I am the only one who lives on this coast, but I try to visit twice a year. I recently reached out to my brother to see when he thinks I should come visit in June and suggested some dates. I know it’s only February, but I want to save money on airfare. He responded: “Isn’t that when we’re going to Hawaii???” It was the first I heard of it. It turns out my parents invited my siblings to Hawaii and planned a family vacation without me. I confronted my parents about it, they swore they invited me too then said I could send them my share of the bill for the resort and book a flight. Like it’s no big deal. I can’t afford to go and I don’t want to go, but I feel really pressured. And sad! They forgot me! Who am I, Kevin McAllister?

> 35J0G39GH6: Find out the resort name. Cancel the reservations. Cease contact.

Within seconds, a dozen upvotes. A minute later, a hundred. Up, up, up. And the replies? Oh, the replies. He smirks at the cracked phone screen.

>> michaelEthelcaine: Fucking brutal as always >> c0y0t3fug1y: LMAO it’s this simple OP - this dude is never wrong >> patcemetery79: I DID THIS BACK IN 2003 FOR A FAMILY REUNION. A REAL RIOT! HAVEN’T BEEN INVITED TO ONE SINCE@ HILARIOUS!!!!!! I LOVE YOU 35J

Simon receives a fair share of downvotes, too. Negative comments. He doesn’t give a shit, but some of them are fucking hilarious.

>> grasshopperwhirlpool: Not funny. Be better than this asshole, OP. I’m sure it was a simple mistake. >> thewildrumpussy: really mature advice. who shit in your coffee?

Every few weeks, a morally righteous do-gooder encourages people to mass-report him, and he gets a slap on the wrist. The idiots come out in droves after some of his more choice replies, like worms after a heavy rain. The most recent offense?

AN [Advice Needed] My husband (35 M) forgot my (33 F) birthday My husband of three years forgot my birthday. No flowers, cake, or gifts. When I came home from work he asked about dinner. I lost it, turned around, and left. I’m at my sister’s house now (and she started baking when I called and told her what happened!) but he won’t stop blowing up my phone. He says it’s because he’s been so busy but here’s the thing: he forgot last year too. I really love him but I’m tired of this treatment.

> 35J0G39GH6: Have your friend take you home between 3-4 AM. Cut his brake lines. Go back to her place. Wait for the inevitable.

>> 6polyesterbutthole9: i dont care if this is illegal its funny af >> passtheaggression: Hand to god, you need your own forum dude.  >> gordonramsme55: Where are the mods on this??? This shit is going to get someone killed. Report this psycho. >>> puffalo: Agreed I think this breaks Rules 3 & 5, reporting now >> austrianPrincess: not saying i did this but when my boyfriend’s brakes failed, i got a big check, OP!  >>> gordonramsme55: This is what I’m talking about!  >>> 6polyesterbutthole9: get that check >> tech60nyneme: WOW someone check this guy’s crawlspace. reported and blocked

That one earns him the most severe ‘punishment’ yet: A month-long commenting ban. No skin off his nose, he's deployed days later, anyway. If anything, the radio silence winds his followers up, their excitement a palpable thing when he gets out of forum jail. He rewards them with another series of blunt, to-the-point pieces of advice. 

His absence makes one particular fan particularly hungry, and a little desperate.

He’s no stranger to unsolicited dick and cleavage pics from his followers. They flood his inbox, giving him a side hobby of delivering pithy degradation the sick fucks seem to love. Saves the best for his private collection. 

But then he gets a picture from some cute thing with a comment about him being her favorite person on the Internet. Knelt all sweet in front of her mirror, haloed by a ring light, white lace barely hiding the goods. His eyes snap to her tits—where his ridiculous username is scrawled in sharpie. There’s nothing to critique except maybe the laundry in the background of the shot. Tugs his cock to it, then clicks her username to check her comment history, and wouldn’t you know. Her location is public on her profile. She’s a couple hours away from her idol and doesn’t even know it. 

>> 35J0G39GH6: Perfection. >> YN10282022: Oh my god, I didn’t think you’d reply. >> YN10282022: You know, a few months ago, you gave me good advice about my creepy boss. >> YN10282022: I posted about the stuff he’d say to me. >> YN10282022: It took some time, but I was able to record him. Sent it over to his wife on their anniversary. When he accused me, I told him HR was getting the next copy. >> YN10282022: I got a promotion and a raise, and sent the file anyway. >> 35J0G39GH6: Good girl. >> 35J0G39GH6: I’ll be in your neck of the woods in a week for work. >> YN10282022: Really?? I’d love to meet up! >> 35J0G39GH6: Probably shouldn’t. I’d advise you against meeting me. >> YN10282022: They do say you should never meet your heroes. :) >> 35J0G39GH6: Shouldn’t meet strangers off the Internet, either.

She still sends him the address of a cafe. It matches one he finds on her social media an hour later. She seems to be a frequent customer. Simon grins at his screen, the sole light source in his dark room. He taps back to her pretty picture.

She looks like an angel.

[lazyalani]

ciel Phantomhive x reader where hiss/o is comforting after the (big reveal in the manga) and they tell him that it does t change how they feel and that they’ll always be here for him

| Ciel Phantomhive × [GN!Reader]

| You with me

| hurt/comfort, angst, our ciel needs a hug :( so much feels, setting is not specified, focused on the main plot of this request so dont mind any other detail, no specific place nor chapter in the manga, just generally after the reveal on the manor, reader is a midford, our ciels real name is astre here, agressive to comfort

| Summary: In which Ciel's greatest fears have come, but his partner is there, so he'll be fine.

| Kuroshitsuji Masterlist

| Main Masterlist

but when i wake up i see

Your footsteps echoed through the place, hurrying somewhere. Where? You didn't know. Afterall, you didn't know where Ciel-- no, the Earl, was.

Your mind was in a haze. So clouded, so dazed. So full of thoughts. So full of unanswered questions. Your chest was heavy. Your emotions were in a rampage, all agressively mixing and fighting with each other. Anger, because he had lied, sadness, because he had lied, mistrust, because they had lied, relief, because no one was hurt, and love, because even after everything, you still loved that lying piece of shit. But could that love be enough ti make up for all those lies?

You want to scream, shout, yell, and curse at him, at them. How dare they lie to you all of you.

When they had escaped, the confused and steady anger you felt during the reveal bursted out into flames. The nerve to lie and then just leave.

Had everything just been a lie to him them?

Ciel Phantomhive had been arranged as your fiance and Astre Phantomhive was arranged for Lizzy.

You were enraged. How dare this boy fool you, his brother's fiance of all people. You were enraged at yourself. How dare you feel something so tender, so gentle towards your fiance's brother, moreso, towards the person who had lied to you.

You were supposed to be happy knowing your true bethroted is still, right? But when you looked into his eyes, all you felt was chills. You shivered, a cold, almost painful brush crossed through your spine. You didn't see your Ciel. You didn't see the boy you had loved so much when you were kids. You didn't even see a small ounce of sadness, not even anger.

All you saw was a scheming boy.

And when you had seen the yard about to arrest Ciel Astre, all you had felt was fear. No, not fear of him. Fear for him.

you with me

You didn't know what possessed you to take a reckless action after they had fled. Was it answers? Maybe.

When they had fled, everyone stared the real Ciel and turned to you. Lizzy had even called out before you ran out of the manor, determined to follow them. Then you returned to the Midford estate to ask for help from Edward.

He had been reluctant, very hesitant, as he always has been when it comes to his sisters. But he seemed to couldn't have resisted the pathetic look on your face, so desperate. He had promised to cover for you and not tell anyone so long as you remained safe and come back after a day.

"Your happiness may be important to me, but my priority is your safety, sister." He had told you, hugged you, and kissed your forehead before you left. You couldn't deny it made you feel better, a lot calmer. A brother's comfort truly is so different. So warm and calming.

and you say,

Your brother, as an heir, had a bit of control on your family's military forces, although a little, still something, as there are still knights loyal to the heir, his own knights. He had lent you some of his knights to help you find traces of them.

During your search eith the knights on a forest, Lau had found you lurking and had offered to bring you to them. So you sent the reluctant knights back and told them to inform your brother of your status. You know you could trust your brother.

So here you are, speeding through the hallway of somewhere Lau had brought you. You saw someone turning through the corner. Sebastian.

You both stopped infront of each other for a moment.

"Milady, I--" He bowed before you cut him off.

"Get out of my sight."

He bowed again and left. He wasn't even surprised you were here. Had Lau told them already? So that bastard had let you roam and get lost around this place while he informed them? You made a mental note to threaten him later on. It seems like these people forgot your place in the society just because you had been kind and tolerated their actions back then.

You took a swift turn to the corner the butler went through and stopped when you had seen him sitting on a couch.

Elbows resting on his knees and hands on his face, seemingly distressed.

He better be. You couldn't be the only one who is tormented too much by this situation.

He called out your name, knowing you were there after hearing you exclaim at his butler.

"as long as i am here,

"Was it fun?" You started. You could feel your calmed down anger bubbling up again.

He said nothing, still hiding his face.

"Was it fun playing with us? Was it fun playing with me?"

Nothing.

"Oh, so now you can't look at me in the eyes. But when you said those lies, you were even smiling." When you told me you cared for me. You thought bitterly.

"I was stupid. I was fool to believe you truly cared for me. I was a fool to believe you would actually do those things for me. But then again, I trusted you because I thought you were Ciel, didn't I?" Oh, yes, you did know where to hit hard, because he flinched.

Yet, you didn't feel satisfied, instead, you felt guilty. Why?

"Did you have everything planned from the start? Putting yourself in danger for me, did you have a back-up plan incase we both couldn't have been saved? All those gifts, those actions, all those words..... lies." You scoffed, feeling your tears coming.

He started rubbing his forehead. You almost wanted to scoff again, you were the one feeling everything here, why was he the one getting a headache? Did he find you annoying?

"Why? Why did you lie to me? Why did you lie to us? Why did you have to go through all those lies? To manipulate us? To manipulate my feelings? You played with my feelings. You fucking playing with me, Phantomhive!" You stomped infront of him with tears in your eyes, demanding an answer.

You heard him murmur something unclear.

"What?!"

"It wasn't a lie."

no one can hurt you"

"Now you're telling me you didn't lie, do you really think I'm that stupi--"

"What I did for you wasn't a lie!" He suddenly stood up and exclaimed.

You were take aback and stepped back. You frowned. "You--"

He took your wrist and pulled you closer to him. Now he was looking at you in the eye, he was enraged. The audacity to be enraged. You wanted to point it out and tell him to let go when he spoke again.

"The things I did for you weren't lies! You can scream at me for pretending to be my brother, hell, yell at me for taking his place as an earl, but don't fucking tell me the things I did for you were lies!" He exclaimed.

You looked away from his piercing stare. "Then why?" Your voice cracked.

His grip on your wrist softened.

"Why would you pretend to be someone you're not?" It was pathetic. How all of your anger disappeared the moment you heard his words. You were so gullible, so vulnerable against him.

He sat down again, letting go of your wrist.

"Would anyone have cared if I said it was me?" His voice was small.

don't wanna lie here,

It broke your heart.

"Would anyone have paid attention if I told the truth? Would I have gotten enough power to keep the Phantomhive name, the honor, the business, alive? Afterall, I'm just some sickly, weak, twin of the heir." He was clenching his fists so hard, you were afraid he was going to draw blood and hurt himself.

So you took his hand in yours. "I would've." You kneeled infront of him, just holding his hand and staring at his visible eye. "Lizzy would've, brother would've, mother, father, aunt anne. We would have cared, Astre."

And he let his tears fall at the sound of his name on your lips. His grip on his own skin softened.

but you can learn to

"You might think so little of yourself, but there's more to what it seems, Astre. You didn't need to lie to us. We would have cared. We do care." You cried and kissed his knuckles. It was heartbreaking how he could think so little of himself. How he could think so little of what he thinks all of you think about him.

if i could change the way that you see yourself

So you look at him in his eye, hoping he would receive the feelings you were conveying to him.

When every lie was revealed, you were angry, so furious, clouded by everything, confused by everything. So many questions, too many unanswered thoughts. You hated yourself for still wanting him despite your real fiance back, despite the lies, despite everything. You hated yourself for feeling something, everything.

But you were willing to burn for him.

You guess being stubbornly inlove runs in the blood.

He stared at you with the same look he gave you before the reveal, during your times with him, after you broke through his cold facade, and shooked his head.

"It doesn't matter, my brother is back--"

"And what of him? He's not the one I love."

"He's your betrothed."

"But he isn't the one I want!"

"You loved him."

"But he isn't you!"

It made him break. He breathed heavily and rested his head on your shoulders. "Why would you even want me?" His voice broke. "After all these lies, after everything I've done. Why would you want me? How could you want someone like me?"

You took his face on your hands and pressed your forehead to his. "Why wouldn't I want someone like you?"

He shut his eyes tightly, trying to keep in the tears but it only made them fall, even through under his eyepatch, you could see his tears.

You brushed his tears with your thumb. "You protected me, you cared for me, you saved me, you smiled for me, hell you did things you didn't want to for me, you loved me. How could I not feel the same?"

you wouldn't wonder why you hear

"I lied to you."

"And I don't care. Atleast, not anymore. I admit, I was so angry at you. For lying to me, because I thought you only did those things to save your own skin. But you stupid asshole, I'm weak when it comes to you." You cried as he let out a cracked chuckled, now he was the one wiping your tears.

"See? I made you cry again." He said, staring at your face. He called out your name, "you truly don't deserve someone like me. You could have someone better, more stable."

You pressed your lips on his forehead. "But I'm here with you, aren't I?"

He nodded, holding your hands to his face. It was warm, safe. "Yeah, you're here."

He thinks he can do it. No, you're here, so he'll do it.

they don't deserve you

[ms-demeanor]

hello! sorry to bother w this but im sort of desperate at this point. given your post about school abuse: so like. i had a similar experience and i thought that i had sorted my brain out. BUT. big but. now im trans and every time i have to correct people w/ misgender or come out to people that i dont already know their opinion on the issue, i get an anxiety attack that makes me unable to do it. ive told many therapists and no one so far has understood why im terrified of making stuff that other people can perceive as me being difficult to work with. would you have *any* advice? thanks!

Okay so first of all it is totally valid to feel that way; that isn't an irrational response, that is your body and brain going "!!!! I have learned this lesson before!" But just because it's a sensible response doesn't mean it's functional in the long term, which is why it needs to be addressed (which I'm sure you already know, I'm just explaining for people in the back).

So now here is some meandering advice:

Spend time with people you already know you can trust. It's okay to take a break from new people and situations (as much as is possible) when you are processing traumatic events and learning to care for yourself. Spending time with people who you don't have to come out to, who don't misgender you, can help you normalize being out and correctly gendered to yourself.

Recognize that you don't have to be out to everyone and some assholes aren't worth it. This is going to depend some on the context, but you don't owe everybody an explanation for yourself and if people repeatedly misgender you after being corrected you may just be better off not spending time around those people.

Loop in trusted people in low-stakes ways. If you get the sense that someone who you think is pretty safe has misgendered you on accident, it might still feel too intimidating to correct them in person but it might be a good idea to follow up with text or a call or a message to say "hey, just FYI, I think I heard you use a/b pronouns for me earlier, I just wanted to let you know that I use c/d pronouns. Did you want to meet up again next week?" the breakdown on why I think this is effective is - Distance means you're safe - nonthreatening "FYI" means you aren't saying "I'm offended" and assumes good faith from the other person - feels less accusatory (not that you need to tone police yourself, but if you're trying to lower the stress level overall then assuming it was a mistake and letting them know you don't think it was on purpose should reduce the overall tension) - request to meet up again or topic switch to something lighter once again says "I'm not mad, that was just regular information, we can now return to our scheduled programming"

I think that, generally speaking, this is also a decent way to come out to people if you're nervous; physically remote and emotionally casual can be a good place to work from (even if you're actually panicking in your head but you can pull off casual in a written message)

Find (or create) a space where people are 100% going to support you. If you need to create a discord server, if you need to schedule a regular coffee date with trusted friends or family members, whatever it is, give yourself a space where you are unconditionally supported and can have people to bounce ideas and concerns off of. Even if it's just you and one other person, it's good to know you have *someone* who you can say "I think I want to tell this other person to use my pronouns but it's scary" to and know that you're not at risk in any way. I'd say try to make sure that you're still interacting with people outside of that space, but have a space to retreat to where you can just drop the worry.

Recognize that somebody else's problem is not a reflection of you. If you have, for instance, a coworker who is being a piece of shit and refusing to recognize your gender, that is not a reflection of your gender that is a reflection of them being a piece of shit. If there is a classmate or a sibling who uses the wrong pronouns after being corrected that doesn't mean you're not entitled to your pronouns that means they are being a piece of shit. Some people are just not going to accept you and that's on them. Try to minimize your time spent with them and if you have to spend time with them at work take steps to ensure your safety, but don't fight losing battles with assholes.

It really is legitimately scary. You have good reasons to be scared and you are doing a very frightening thing (and not to do the meme thing but you are legitimately being so brave about it; the fact that you are reaching out and asking anyone for help, including randos on the internet, means that you are taking steps to doing the scary thing and that is SO GOOD and I'm really proud of you for making the effort in spite of the fear).

Here is some less meandering advice:

Practice. Talk to yourself in the mirror, practice with friends, practice with your therapist. Practice coming out to yourself in a casual way. Practice correcting your pronouns. Practice an introduction for yourself that explains the information you want to give to new people you might meet. Get it down to a quick little patter, get it to be something that's easy to say to yourself in the mirror first, then try it with friends for practice, then try it around the safer people you might want to give the information to. It'll get easier as you go.

Look for a local support group (or an online support group). If there's a local LGBTQ+ center you should see if they've got events going on or a support group you can join or workshops or any manner of social thing where you can go interact with people who have been through similar stuff.

Journal. Each time you find yourself frightened of talking to someone about your gender, do what you need to to get through the day and then sit down and think about that interaction. Write down what happened, write down what you were thinking. Was there something in particular that made you anxious? Is it something you can practice addressing? Was there something you noticed about the person that made you uncomfortable? Is that a common thread in the times you have trouble talking about this? If you're able to narrow down specifically what is making it hard to speak to some people that might make it easier to explain to therapists but will also make it more actionable for you.

Here's some very optimistic advice:

If at all possible find a friend who will be rabid and unflinching in their support for you and hang out with them around new people. Get yourself an attack dog copilot who will cheerfully step up and make corrections for you. I know not everyone can do this and I know that if you can find someone like this they can't be around all the time, but it can be wonderfully reassuring to find that one person who you know is going to be ride or die about making sure that everyone in the room respects you. (Being that person for someone else can also teach you how to be that person for you)

[andy-wm]

Andy, I dont think JM is queer, coz in WHO he is singing about a her, not a they.

She/her pronouns leave no scope for ambiguity.

Anon, that's like me saying 'Anonymous' must be your real name because that's who the ask came from.

Makes sense?

No.

No it does not.

If the pronouns were THEY, Jimin would be

a) slammed for being woke

and

b) not clearly telling you that he lives in a society that makes him think his love MUST be a she/her. And he can't find love, he can't find it anywhere.

If he had grown up thinking he could find love with (he/she/they... any pronouns) don't you think he would have found it by now? I mean, look at him, he's so beautiful and kind and smart. How could he not find someone?

Would he be singing songs about how he can't find love?

The way he specifically says HER tells you THAT'S WHERE THE PROBLEM LIES.

Please, Anon (not your real name, yeah?)

Please, for your future self, for you to navigate the information you encounter every day, don't just grab the first thing you see and run with it. Sure, consider your immediate reaction, but also consider what else might be happening.

Because theres always more than one way to look at a situation.

(Thats why we have a jury of 12 and courts of law, and we don't just let people claim revenge for perceived wrongs by vigilante justice. Because there's two sides to a story, and you need different perspecives to see all the angles.)

Critical thinking skills are important because often messages are hidden.

Sometimes it's because the author wants you to misunderstand at first, because their real meaning will have more impact when you discover it later.

Sometimes there are two different messages directed at two different types of audience (like kids movies with adult jokes hidden in them)

Sometimes it's because they actually cannot say what they really want to say because they aren't allowed to or because it'snot safe or because they simply don't want to be upfront.

In the case of this song, it's all three of those reasons.

Context clues tell us that this album is very queer themed. There are rainbows and smeraldo flowers everywhere.

Smeraldo flowers LITERALLY mean a hidden truth/ truth untold/ I couldn’t tell the truth.

The original posts about Smeraldo flowers are translated here:

You'll find this here: https://cafearmy.wordpress.com/category/flower-smeraldo-blog-post-translations/page/2

There are also clues in the WHO music video - the extended metaphor of the weather, and the rainbows and colour flares. These tell us THERE'S MORE GOING ON HERE.

Read the lyrics and also watch the mv and think about what you are hearing and seeing.

Follow the story and think about WHY everything is happening the way it happens.

The director didn't just randomly yell "ok dance! Now run a bit, now look at the camera, now sing!"

There's a plan. The plan is based on a story they're telling. The story has an ending that THEY ALREADY KNOW, but that we don't.

Until we've seen the whole thing and thought about it, and then gone back to see what we missed the first time around, we dont know.

Like Spring Day isn’t REALLY about the seasons, and Bapsae isnt about birds, and The Truth Untold isn't about growing flowers.

Go back and watch the MV with the audio muted and think about the story thr MV tells without the music.

Read the lyrics as though you are reading a poem.

Genuinely, i care about this (i am a school librarian Anon, i wouldn’t be one if i didn't care about how people interact with information) so listen and think about it.

Then come back and tell me if you still think he's not queer because the pronouns in this song are she.

Borahae 💜

[hana-no-seiiki]

But like the ship trope where PERSON A looks like a childish brat on the outside but is actually the stable, mature one in the relationship

while PERSON B is the opposite wherein they’re super stoic, cool-headed but is actually super petty and aggressive at times.

tw/cw: soft yandere themes, seggs but not explicit

😤🫸🏽🫷🏽

That but with Villain and/or Vigilante! Reader and Yandere! Damian.

I’ve seen this a lot in Damian Wayne works so credits go to those amazing writers that inspired me to have my own take on this!! A lot of this is just a rehash/amalgamation of what people have already written but with some of my input and thoughts…lots and lots of thoughts.

Anyways, you seem like the type of person to ruin another’s life for the sake of it. Just your wicked whims. You’re notorious for stealing massive amounts of properties or (in case of Vigilante) beat if not kill people who you deem unredeemable.

MINORS/AGELESS BLOGS DONT GO BEYOND THIS POINT

VER I : I’m thinking second gen Catwoman/Batman + CatNoir/Ladybug (both the OG anime concept and the series) dynamic, just gn reader.

You’re always clinging unto to Robin/New Batman. Saying sweet nothings and flirting with him, if not full on making out/having sex with the vigilante. You like the dude, really. But your heart remains with Damian Wayne. Robin/Batman just really reminded you of him sometimes.

Hatefucking. Hatefucking happens a lot. Robin/Batman loves pinning you to the walls/floors of alleyways before you two get down and dirty.

Whereas, people (namely his fellow vigilantes) think he’s done with you, but he’s probably the biggest [Villain Name] fanboy out there.

He knows basically everything about you except your true identity. Which is somehow completely inaccessible to him.

Little does he know that it was actually his own doing, locking your civilian self’s private information as a favor between friends.

But because of this he misunderstands and thinks you’re even more of a genius or something because you managed to outwit him!! You!! Are!! So!! Damn!! Amazing!!

Damian acts cold with everybody. He’s a brooding guy. He doesn’t express much. Only about 1% of what he’s feeling actually gets put into action and/or words.

So the fact that he insists on taking on missions where he has to face you, assists you if you aren’t harming anyone, or actually indulges in your flirtation is a big thing.

So it’s safe to say when he found out you liked someone else other than him, that you were just using him to get yourself to feel better about not having said dude he gets petty.

You two used to have this pact, to never interfere with each other’s civilian lives and to respect your secret identities (of which he’s tried to breach remotely several times). But all that goes up in flames as he stalks you after a heist. Following you home.

He finds out about your secret identity, your ‘unrequited’ love for him, and you two begin dating. But you’re still oblivious about his other identity.

Damian kinda has a kink for it ngl. Like he’ll charm you as Robin/Batman even as you tell him you’re already dating someone else.

Like it’s so adorable how you keep resisting him, telling him how much you love his civilian counterpart.

But then he still proceeds to fuck your brains out as a Vigilante.

Man didn’t know he was into roleplaying until this moment. Like he’ll murmur stuff like “You say you love him, but nothing beats this. I’ve already carved a place inside you, Beloved. A place shaped in my image.”

Or “Where did your ‘undying love’ go, hm? Nowhere. You’re right back with me. Complete undone within moments of my touch.”

Things go a little awry though when you, ever the mature/communicative one in the relationship attempt to break up because Robin/Batman is leaving you confused as to how you truly feel. In addition to you not want to cuck your beautiful (soon to be ex) boyfriend any longer.

VER II: Is more on Vigilante x Vigilante. Similar to the one above except your relationship is a lot more professional and less hate-fuckey. You know of each other’s civilian/vigilante selves.

You’ve always admired Damian. Despite being quite close in age, you always saw him as a younger brother if not like a son almost. Witnessing him grow up and mature alongside you.

But your doting nature always came off a tad bit romantic. Flirtatious even. You tended to be a playful person after all. Hell you even call him Babe or Baby like that’s totally normal for you to call friends that.

A lot of your friends and colleagues always laugh at Damian’s expense whenever you arrive to come nag and/or flirt with him. It’s honestly hilarious. Judging from his murderous aura, people always thought that he wanted you 6 feet under.

The truth of the matter was that his glares and thoughts of murder were all directed to everyone else but you.

Damian never felt so at home and at peace with anyone or anything but his pets in life.

He’d be damned if anything happens to you.

Still, it frustrates him. He knows that you only see him as sibling almost. That you’d die for him but never date him. That despite your honeyed words he’s probably neck deep in the friendzone.

And so to the absolute surprise of everybody, he starts flirting back.

e.g. murdering those who slighted you and/or gazed upon your visage for too long, delivering their remains to your doorstep, amongst a bouquet flowers of course, and the occasional chocolates

You eventually fall in love back, though you ask him to tone it down on the violence.

- might edit more soon, but for now adios!!!

[fairycosmos]

Hello

Long time follower. Big fan.

Umm i dont have any "real" friends and i feel like i have to vent about what happened to me with someone so plz bare with me.

Yesterday I was sexually assaulted. Outside my own apartment building by a man that is an "aquaintance" at most. I managed to get away by stepping on his foot and elbowing him in the stomach before it went any further. What sucks even more is that I live in a super conservative middle eastern country that has a society that loves to victim blame. I cant even go to the police cuz i have no proof and the sad thing is this the THIRD time in my life of 30 years where i get sexually assaulted. The first time was my cousin when I was 13 and the second time was someone who was a close friend when i was in my 20s. I feel pathetic and cowardly for not speaking up every time it happened. I know I cant tell my family cuz they are religious and all they care about is my "chastity" whatever the fuck that is and i honestly dont know what to do anymore.

Thank you for listening

🪽

hey angel,

i’m so sorry it took me a minute to see this, and honestly, i'm just fkn enraged that you're even in this position to begin with. none of this should’ve ever happened to you, and it’s so beyond messed up that you’ve had to go through it, and more than once, on top of everything else. first, i just want to say that i’m so, so grateful to you for opening up about it, especially when you’re feeling so isolated. it takes so much courage to even put this into words, and i’m honored that you trust me with it at all tbh. as much of an eye roll it is to hear, you’re truly not alone in this. and you’re definitely not “pathetic” or “cowardly” for how things played out or for not feeling like you could speak up before. the way you’re feeling is real, valid, and so understandable—especially when support and safety feel so distant.

it’s beyond unfair to be in a place where victim-blaming is such a huge part of the culture. to have to carry that, while being made to feel like you have to hide this, is an awful weight. but please know, this is not on you—none of it. the guilt and shame that the world tries to put on you is not yours, even if sometimes that feels impossible to believe. grounding yourself in the truth—that you haven’t done anything wrong, no matter how often you have to remind yourself—can be a solid step. and if you believe that for other people who've been in your shoes, then you must believe it for yourself too. ultimately, the shame belongs to the people who assaulted you and a world that hasn’t supported you the way you deserve. please don’t let their actions shape how you see yourself. your survival, your resilience, your courage etc that’s who you are.

there are a few places that might be able to give you some support, even if it’s from a distance. rainn.org offers confidential chat options and resources, and while it’s u.s.-based, it could still be useful if you need a safe space to talk. another is pandora’s project, a support and forum site specifically for survivors. they have spaces where people from all backgrounds, including those with similar cultural challenges, can connect. <3

if you’re open to it, a counselor or therapist who specializes in trauma and works online might be a good option, too. there are so many who understand the importance of privacy and safety in environments where speaking out can be challenging. the International Association for Trauma Professionals has a directory that could help you find someone who’d really get where you’re coming from and respect those unique challenges.

just remember, it’s okay to take this one step at a time. if all you can do today is share this with someone who cares, or offer yourself some compassion and grace to cry and breathe and be pissed and hurt and numb and upset, then that’s more than enough. i believe in your right to feel safe, supported, and heard, and there are people who genuinely want to help you get there, however and whenever you need.

sending you so much love and strength <3 if you need to vent or if you just need someone to talk to, please msg me any time. i understand what it's like to have your boundaries violated too and i know how lonely and painful it is to contend with it in your own head. x

[welcomehomediscordserver]

(joking) CW: AGGRESSIVE SUPPORT AND LOVE FOR CLOWN FROM THE MOD TEAM AND MEMBERS OVER AT OUR DISCORD SERVER !!

I have found joy in your little show that I rarely find in things. The overwhelming love and care I have not just for these specific characters but for your art and talent as a whole is astounding. I want you to know that your community, the good parts of it, support you in any endeavor you choose to take. Although this project may have blasted your popularity you are 3-dimensional, you are much more than the creator of welcome home. You are a multi-medial, skilled, talented, and strong artistic being. Throughout all of this I have had nothing but the utmost respect for you. I will continue to no matter what. Just know we over at The Welcome Home discord server have been following your art closely and appreciating every detail! Do what is best for you clown, and continue to do so! -Reggie

It's been a while since something has grabbed me like this... Welcome Home is one of the most precious things I have ever seen, the creation has and will it always have a place in my heart. Thank You creator for sharing this piece of you heart with us. But your safety is more important, I hope that you'll be safe. -Jax

"dear clown, from the heart of one fan to many others, i find so much comfort in your project that i hope that even when things just like now are awful, you know that there's people simultaneously supporting you in every step of the way! We can wait however long you believe is necessary, you deserve to feel respected with your own passion project! And with that to a close, i wish you well! Thank you for giving us a grand welcome home!" -gremints

dear clown, you don't know me. i don't know you either. but everything you've been working on? it's changed my life. and i know that sounds cliche and silly, but it's true. you've inspired me to keep working on my own passion projects, to keep going. because of you, i have found a little community to call home. because of you, i have rekindled my love of silliness and color and creativity. i cannot thank you enough. without you, i would not have found the friends i have now. whatever you do, i want you to know that we're here to support it. and i hope that wherever you go, you also find home. - moth

Hi you dont know me but im Bug, one of the mods^^, I just want to start my message with this, Before I found welcome home, everything for me was going downhill, I had lost so much that was important to me in less than 2 weeks, I couldn't get out of bed and I wasn't doing my favorite things anymore. I couldn't even smile, My eyes were tired and heavy from crying. But thanks to you, Clown. Wonderful you..and your beautiful vibrant creation. With characters I saw and adored right away. I've smiled, danced, sang my favorite songs again, met new and amazing friends & began to draw again. I felt happiness faster than I thought I would again. A peace from your life helped heal some of mine and I'm grateful. Your creations bring me and so many others joy, But even then it as not as important as you. Yes It brings many smiles to people and i hope that doesn't sound to overwhelming.. But although we can't fix the issue people have caused you, we can't apologize for those who don't respect the boundaries you've set and we can't take back what others have done we want you to know that no matter what, the good of the community will always Have what's best for you in mind, in our server we make sure all rules are followed and you're privacy and mental health is respected. Take as much time as you need to take it all in, relax, do what's best for clown. 💚 take care of yourself before aything else. We thank you for all you've done already. -Boogerbug

EVERYTHING BELOW WAS SUBMITTED BY MEMBERS !!

Hi Clown! Just another rando passing through! While I have known about your artwork for a few years now, I never dove into it until Welcome Home became popular, and I genuinely love the vision you have. Your other artwork is also phenominal and genuinely inspires me, and it always has, even before I discovered the Welcome Home website. Your character designs are impeccable, the way you portray the muppets is genuinely awesome and brings back a lot of good memories, as I grew up watching puppet shows. Explains one reason I enjoy your work doesn't it?Despite making godly artwork, people forget that you are a human like the rest of us. Most people who become famous or popular because of something they have done experience this and it is unfortunate, but there are some of us that know you have a life and are already struggling. Take the time you need to rejuvinate yourself and try not to let these people get to you, as hard as it is to do, as even I still struggle with this daily. These are your creations, and you deserve to have control over what happens with them, and the disrespect this slowly growing fanbase has for your requests is terrible. Hoping that things eventually improve on your end, especially since you already aren't in a safe environment, something I also understand. I've already planned on throwing some bucks at you through Ko-Fi once I open my new bank account, and even if I cant, I still want to help prove that you are worthy and deserve better than this. You are incredibly talented and I hope to see Welcome Home and all of your other works of art flourish over time! - Sunnie/Mizo

Now onto the big reveal....

Our server members as well as a few mods all banded to together to create a collage showing our appreciation and support for Clown during these rough times. I hope this can serve as a reminder that despite the shitty people out there, there is a large community who still very much respects and enjoys every aspect of Clowns artwork.

An art collage put together by the moderators with art submitted by members.

Below are more signages as well as the usernames of everyone who participated:

Micah

Maximus

Beans

Wynn

Avery

Global

Vinnzhe

- and lastly, the rest of the welcome home discord server 🩷

@partycoffin

[gravytrainnaturebornn]

the power of self-talk in the fight against self-sabotage (for binge-eaters and ppl who have never been skinny🫶)

disclaimer: this is not proana. this is for people who struggle with binge eating as a form of self-sabotage, emotional comfort, self harm, etc. overeating can cause just as much harm physically and mentally as undereating. please be safe. now, on with the show!

weight loss, but specifically extreme weight loss, equals change. change equals discomfort, so people tend to subconsciously avoid change. this is why starting to see progress on the scale or your body can trigger the urge to self-sabotage that progress and binge eat.

for people who have been big their whole lives, that fear is heightened by the fact that being thin is completely uncharted territory. by following through, youre entering a new world that youve never navigated before. your brain might get scared, say its much too big a mountain to climb, and tell you to give up. its easier to say fuck it because for most people, unhappiness is a comfort zone. if youre used to hating your body and wanting it to change, then actually *changing* it poses a very serious threat to your comfort and the lifestyle youre used to.

questions like: "what if i reach my goal and im still unhappy/unattractive?" "what if i dont look like myself?" "what if i reach my goal, cant sustain it, and then i gain it all back and humiliate myself?" can all make someone feel anxious about succeeding in their weight loss journey. and for people with overeating issues, this is a big trigger for binge episodes.

so how do you combat this instinct to self sabotage? well, im not a psychologist so take this with a grain of salt, but for me it helps to soothe these subconscious fears and train the brain to fight these urges. self-talk and thought-correction play a HUGE role in rewiring the pathways in your brain that lead you to bingeing. truly, practice and consistency are the only things that are going to cause a big change, so stick with it !

correcting problematic thoughts *immediately* when they form is key to preventing problematic behavior in the future, and that starts with being able to identify those thoughts. the moment you catch yourself thinking about food, cut yourself off with a correction. maybe even think about food on purpose a few times to practice recognizing and correcting it.

for example, if you just ate an hour ago, chances are youre not actually hungry yet. tell yourself that as soon as you realize youre thinking about food. i like to tell myself "i dont need to eat, and im not gonna sabotage myself by eating that." by acknowledging it and calling it what it is--literally an attack, by my brain, on my own progress--i immediately attach a sense of accountability to the actions that follow. there's no deniability. its no longer a passive choice. theres no mindless eating or "i wasnt thinking about it." if i eat after acknowledging the act of eating as self-sabotage, then that is me *actively* choosing self-sabotage over self-control. accountability alone can change a lot if you let it.

what i tell myself changes depending on the situation, but i find that repeating some of these phrases throughout the day helps to fight urges in general, and certain ones help for specific cravings and situations.

below are some examples of things i tell myself that have helped me fight the urge to self sabotage. they dont all have to be true when you first say them, the point is training your brain to think a certain way. it may feel unnatural at first, but the more you say them the more natural it becomes, until eventually it becomes apart of the way you actually think and you dont have to work so hard at it. remember: consistency. is. key.

okay ill stop blabbing! here:

•i allow myself to be thin.

•i accept the change that comes with losing weight.

•i am ready to see myself differently and cope with any complicated feelings that may come with it.

•i am prepared for my body to change.

•i will deal with my wardrobe when the time comes, and im not afraid of dressing differently for my new body.

•i will adjust to my new dietary needs and appetite when i reach my goal weight. i will not always be hungry; eating less will be my new normal, and i will be okay.

•i am not afraid of being hungry.

•food does not comfort me, nor does it solve my problems or make me feel better.

•i am ready to navigate a life that looks different to the one im living now.

•i am not afraid of reaching my goal. if i do feel afraid, i am confident in my ability to work through difficult feelings and continue towards my goal.

•im not going to sabotage myself by eating that.

•i accept that people will perceive me differently, and i am ready to navigate that change.

•i am prepared to receive comments about my weight loss.

•i am not afraid of getting what i want.

•i believe i deserve what i want, and im dedicated to working towards getting it.

•i am capable of adapting to new routines and habits.

•fear is not a reason to give up, and i will continue to work even if the possibility of change makes me uneasy.

•i am prepared to face the future, even though i do not know what it looks like.

•i allow myself to make mistakes, and i will not use them as an excuse to quit.

•my long-term satisfaction is more important than what i want in this moment.

•i am in control of my actions and i am capable of resisting the urge to binge.

•i allow myself to have the body i desire.

•i allow myself to change.

•i allow my life to look different and i am not afraid to see a new person in the mirror.

•i am excited to reach my goal, and prepared to navigate any changes that come with it.

•i am ready to meet and introduce others to the new me.

[melkyt]

Switching it up lol.

Immortal!Law/Seraphim!Luffy - Major character death

The king of the pirates achieved his goal, lived a good life surrounded by those that he cared for, and in time, he passed away.

Law thought that he would follow him soon, but the immortality surgery happened to be something that one has to give away. Until then, they will live forever. Law lost his chance to give it to the man he loved and never said, nobody else ever seemed worthy to give his life for. Which is the prerequisite of being able to use the surgery, *devotion*. So he wanders for a long time, helping people, curing diseases, making sure the world Luffy left behind is safe.

He sometimes visits islands that is under the strawhats protection, even after Luffy's death, his fleet, his friends still keep a presence. Zoro is set on keeping order as long as he can. Law's next stop is egghead, after the events that happened there, it is slowly being fixed up and getting back to what it was. He likes hearing the stories of what the strawhats pulled here decades ago.

Law is sitting at the bar, talking to someone who recognized him, and was around back then. Its a peaceful, quiet chat. Law doesnt quite pay attention as he sips from his drink and lets his mind slow down for once.

That is when he sees a form across the crowded street. Familar curls, eyes filled with joy, laughter that rungs above everyone elses.

"Luffy!" Law is up and shouting his name before he can think, striding closer.

And they turn, looking a little confused, large wings fluttering as they open. There is a flash of memory in the seraphims eyes, or maybe Law imagines it. This close, he can see that they are differences, no scar, the smile more hesitant at the corners of his mouth, the stark white hair of the Nika form.

The one next to him is a seraphim version of Zoro, ofcourse he wouldn't leave his captain, even in a situation like this.

"My mistake" Law takes a deep, steadying breath. It's not Luffy. It is one of the clones that have been stirring trouble the last few years. If he paid more attention to the news, he wouldn't be caught unaware now.

S-Luffy blinks, tilting his head. "Wait, you're Trafalgar Law!I wanna ask you things!"

Law flinches, Luffy only called him by his name once or twice, when they were arguing. It brings back memories he doesn't want to face. He shouldn't have shouted, it is time to leave.

The seraphim moves faster than him, flying over the crowd and landing with a heavy thud of machinery that sustains his body. "Don't run, I just wanna talk about previous me!"

"No" Law turns and walks in a different direction. It is too much to see Luffy there as a different man, one he can't hold and whisper how much Law missed him.

The clone cant take no for answer, just like the original Luffy. Genetic memory goes hard in this case.

He follows after with a million questions and never stops talking. It eventually works as Law's determination and resistance falters in the light of Luffy's enthusiasm as it always does. He sits down in some back alley and starts answering them.

They talk well into the night and for days after. Neither have to sleep, eat, or drink if they dont want to. Law wants to spend as much time as he can get before forgetting that the clone exists. it's not his Luffy.

After S-Luffy runs out of questions to ask, he doesnt want to leave Law either, and he wont.

Que S-Luffy coming up with random reasons, random things for Law to do as a doctor and a lover of information, until he has a house on egghead and doesn't even think of leaving. Domestic shenanigans ensue as the two immortals try to figure out where they stand with the memory of the original Luffy being the thing that connects them and a standard that is impossible to match up to. Law finds that his love for S-Luffy is different, built in moments of peace, and cant be blamed on adrenaline which is what he did all those years ago when he did not want to face his feelings.

-end-

Check out The Lawlu Whumptober Event I'm Hosting

[laststandx3]

I'll be bitter for a minute and say it: i think the terror for how good it is, is also very partial on crozier on being #1 mister only good colonizer in the arctic, and i sort of hate it because the change happens only because he sobers up. and sure alchool makes people cruel, but sobering up doesnt make them perfect. he went from let silna be left on the ship without protection/kick her out for the tuunbaq if she doesnt help us/ rip the guy that died to get me a bottle of whisky, anywayy to peace and love on planet earth lets us all take this walk together while i share words of wisdom and love with this other colonizer who's also very sorry he didn't do anything good with his life. Crozier started the journey at least as a heavy day-drinker and i understand how that's different from heavy alcholism but at the same time i can't imagine all of crozier's faults being the consequences of whisky alone. and having him overcoming his alcholism and wising up immediately after being clean for a few weeks is FOR ME a terrible writing choice that paints him as being naturally good and his 'bad' behaviors coming ONLY from the alchool. yes he sees blanky getting hurt and that's starts his sobering up path. but that's not enough for me. the people (other characters state aloud for the audience) he loves more than god loves them are dying left and right. and i really dont care if corzier cares about the crew or not but if he cared he should have cared about them even when he was drunk and not remembring about their wellbeing AFTER he got clean. i'm not saying you cant enjoy crozier. i just believe his character development isnt earned and that he got it only because he's the designed good character that canonically survives in the book. i dont think that him shitting himself for a few weeks while sobering up can count as having the emotional development to go from one extreme to the other. especially because everyone else is also there sufferring physically and psychologically even more than him due to the fact that their all stranded in the arctic and dying of scurvy and no one else in the crew could have the time off work, privacy and attentions to heal. crozier being the 2nd on command and then captain used his power to become a drunk and later to clean up. and i just dont believe that a man who abused his position like that from the beginning just becuase he was pissed he couldnt marry the woman he wanted suddently stops abusing his position because he's now clean and pure. TO ME it's a bad writing choice that is also force-fed to the audience with the line 'more than god loves them' so that you get it for sure that he's the good guy who cares about people not like those others evil characters who would do anything to survive like killing innocents and being racist (the good guys could never. except they canonically did- but wait, not in THIS continent so it doesnt matter) and eating people (which is a sign of being naturally evil, no matter the circumstances) or following a religion in a desperate last chance of survival (again no one on the good guys side would put religion above good sense and the safety of fellow human beings. in this continent?? maybe? ugh)

in summary i think the main flaw i find in the terror is how much it still tries to draw a line between good and evil. instead of just trying to portray the human disperation for their mortal condition. how much having to come face to face with tuunbaq must destroy all of those men convinctions on what life/afterlife are (for what i remember it just addresses it for tozer AND in the SCRIPT) nobody else gets a life shuttering experience. it's either the devil, then good christians should be safe, or it's a different religion, then what?? what do you do when your life looses its meaning? and the answer for most of the charactes was 🤷‍♀️guess we'll think about it after this awesome party we're about to throw. i dont want this to be about religion, but these men are wrecked in every way, there's nobody to save them and everyday they're a little more in pain than the one before. there shouldnt be a camp of the good men lead by the strong and wise one who take care of their sick and lets the dying die peacefully with morphin. while in the bad guys camp they eat people and have evil laugh competitions and kill their sick with knifes bc giving them poison might make them unedible. and specifically those evil guys where also the reason why the expedition happened to hurt the locals, the good guys have nothing to do with it.

i dont think there's nothing wrong (narratively) in doing anything to survive. even if it's something cruel, because those men are at the end of the world alone, it's at least realistic that they'll try everything to avoid death. crozier(and jfj even if offscreen) gets to be cruel at the beginning of the story but by middle point they're shown to be sad (about unrelated things) and spend the last few episodes being kind and brave (and forgiven by the narrative) while their chance at character development is uniquelly given by their ranks. in the meantime the consequences of those cruelness (only hickey, because we dont get to see survivors of jfj trip to China, if he left any) dont get the chance to heal and change because hickey's position of subordiante never allows him to be really safe, and because his torture was public, automatically making every witness taking the side of the perpetrator. hickey's never given weeks off work to recover because he got lashed because of his own actions. hickey doesnt get words of wisdom from a companion because in his mind everyone agreed with crozier in him deserving the lashes, (except maybe tozer? but even that isnt that clear cut) hickey, manson and hartnell also magiaclly heal from the lashes after a few weeks (even when ANYOTHER character cant heal because of scurvy) so the narrative can't held crozier accountable for the pain he caused.

the good guys and the bad guys' actions are treated differently by the show. even when the good guys actions should have consequences and the bad guys' shouldnt. the narrative has already decided which sins will be forgiven and which will be punished. and it's a bit annoying to me because for how wonderful the terror is, i cant help but feel like i'm being spoonfed a narrative about morality when at its core the story is about humanity.

[mobiused]

is it too late to ask for said actual nuanced statement about your feelings on the way loona has split up and how you feel about supporting each of the factions as a fan

No :0 Okay well this posted early accidentally come back when I've edited it with the answer you seek; edit here it is

As anybody who follows me and actually listens to what I post knows, yes, I was disappointed with the choice that the 5 members in modhaus made.

The reason is of course Jaden Jeong's involvement in the conditioned that caused the members' suffering. I honestly do not care to "respect" the members' choice when, firstly, they're public figures, which means they're in a position where they open themselves to judgement, having surpassed what it means to be a regular person into an overman; hence, idol (no this isn't lore) (yes it is) and it is parasocial to think we as fans owe them the kind of blind devout respect that is reserved for people you know and are close to. We, of course, need to respect them as people even if they are idols which leads to my next point. Secondly, they're adult women who are capable of making their own choices. It is only patronizing, infantilising and self delusionary to cheer them on for every choice they make void of criticism. If I respect them as a person, that means I care about the decisions they make enough to be able to disagree with them. The only decisions you respect unconditionally are from your God (if you have faith) or someone who has got you fucked up.

of course all of this is only my opinion to be clear ^^;

So to continue, I don't respect their decision to join modhaus. However I do accept their decision and think of them no less as people - that's very important to me for people to be aware of! That may have sounded harsh but I only have strong feelings because I care.

When it comes to modhaus vs ctd, to ME it feels like a faction of people who are willing to ignore a history of mistreatment to blindly follow their idols because that's what idolatry is versus a faction who are distrusting and reluctant to give a second chance to a man (and his company) who have done them wrong. And of course bias vs bias.

Regarding why I don't hold ctd to the same standard as modhaus; one is an established company with another group under their belt and the other is a company that formed because Hyunjin asked really niceys. The "mistakes" that modhaus are making, like having Jaden and doing NFTs and having loss of the members' autonomy to give fans control as a business model (to be frank, I don't care about missing english subtitles or those small things, its whatever) are much more severe to me than CTD fumbling the bag in ways that only affect them financially. Sorry I don't care about them picking venues that are too big for them on a concert, I don't think it's that big a deal.

In this way, I think cloo vs ourii, ctd vs modhaus, is much more than the preference people have for the idols actually in the companies but rather an ideological thing. Can you put the past (that isn't yours to begin with) behind you to stan a group with no guarantee of being completely safe and in control, or are you going to be wary of a company that has done little to demonstrate how it's protecting the girls' best interests. At least that's how it looks to me.

And it's weird how we dont see Chuu & Yves akgaes right? And I think that's because the companies are such unknown elements that it's nowhere near as polarising to support them, like there's no reason not to.

And I do think there is a lot of us vs them going on. (some) People who are artms member stans who have become full-blooded ouriis have made it their mission to find any excuse to bring CTD down - maybe out of a guilty conscience vengeance for the criticism that modhaus has been getting. And the same can definitely be said about cloos who just want more reasons to shit on modhaus even though the problems are inconsequential (see? I'm not wholly biased)

In summary I just think it's sad that it's had to have been this divisive. If the loona members weren't in the position that they were - that no company was willing to accept them bar modhaus, and the members who got out first didn't feel obligated to go to modhaus, since CTD - and other places - weren't an option, things maybe would've turned out differently. Or maybe they wouldn't have, and there will always be fanwars regardless.

[fernlessbastard]

first time using this ask thing heh and i don’t rly know what to say, but, as a casual tntduo lover to another tntduo lover, i desperately kindly ask what are your favourite fics? dont rly mind if its suggestive/smut, id still like to show dem authors love and support. as a trade offer, ill leave some fic recs on my next ask hehe :]

anyways been following u for a while now (on insta) and id like to say ur art brings me immense joy and never fails to inspire me. hope u and your partner have a nice day! bubye !

i know this aint a prompt or idea or concept but u just seem like a cool person that i want to interact with :]

Hiiiiii

My guy, I am so sorry, but I hardly have any recommendations...

Why? Well, I went to my AO3 account, and like a solid 1/3 of my history was completely deleted - as in the works were deleted. Additionally, I haven't been reading much lately, so I have no newer titles, unfortunately. But here's the couple I have:

there's always this thing that we're becoming. Brilliantly written, genuinely gorgeous, in character, etc - it is smut though (top notch smut, though)

I'm pretty sure I enjoyed TntDuo Content I Don't Want To Attach My Username To too - also smut lmao

Agape - NOT smut, for once, but never finished lmao

There's also this fic I am completely not connected to ha ha it's called Losing Face and while it is unfinished I heard that the author is doing this like kinda rewrite kinda reimagining sort of thing where tldr it's the same concept just executed better ha haa👀👀👀

Another one is real life au - it's VERY heavy though. Like, I had to stop reading it at some point cause it was legitimately just hitting too hard. It is well written, and it's supposed to evoke those emotions, but just be VERY careful with it. VERY tldr is that it's about Schlatt - Q's abusive ex - becoming Wilbur's sugar daddy. It is VERY dead dove do not eat, and deals with SA and s-cidal ideation. The fic is called Sugar Lips, but I won't put the link here cause seriously, it's fucking heavy - and in a very realistic way, not the fantasy "eating someone's heart while they're alive" type of thing, but in a "this happens to real people in real life" type of way. Idk if you still want to read it dm me for the link but yeah, just please stay safe, guys

And then there's one work which I cannot find for the life of me - I don't know if it got deleted or something but if it wasn't, tntblr please help me find it It was about Wilbur coming to Quackity when his stitches break. Once the guy stitches him up, there's a whole scene when Wilbur has a breakdown and Quackity helps him through it. Then I believe it's kinda this sort of "montage" of how Wilbur and Q kinda grow closer, and (spoiler alert) it ends with some event during which Sapnap and Karl show up and there's arguing and at some point Wilbur and Sapnap start fighting (physically) and Wilbur ends up beating Sapnap to death. It was so well written, and it was one of the earliest fics i've read, and i haven't been able to find it for a long, long time now

Anyway send me asks about absolutely anything, don't worry about it being "right" or anything - all asks are welcome, be it HCs, prompts, ideas, or just some appreciation, sharing something you like, a question to me, etc :]

[crazysodomite]

older lgbt art and writing is so refreshing because it's just. honest, fun, filled with love for other people in the community... some of this art was made during the toughest times for lgbt people and they still found love and support for each other.

people on social media are so needlessly cruel and mean spirited. its like the only thing people care about is how to let everyone know what they hate and what annoys them about other people and everyone just wants to find the meanest cruelest thing to say so they look like the Coolest Radicalest person in the room unlike those Cringe Lamers :/// its so fucking exhausting. as a person who has no community irl and lives in a place where lgbt people have no rights its so fucking exhausting to see how people in western countries do nothing all day other than talk about how much they hate other people who frankly did nothing wrong other than be mildly annoying (in their own subjective opinion).

people online get off to making others feel bad about themselves.

in my country being lgbt can end up with you being slammed face first into the floor by cops in full riot gear and going to prison afterwards. but full grown adults should talk more how obnoxious they find trans furries or whatever the fuck the "cool thing to shit on and find annoying of the week" is. i dont feel safe talking about anything online. and i don't. there's no community online or offline. just. constant immature bullshit.

i dont really want to tie this into something specific. just the general pattern. people follow 'trends' because they want to interact and be in community with other people. not everyone is trying to be Cool and Not Cringy by being irony poisoned and nihilistic or cruel 😐not everyone is pursuing the goal of being cool and better than everybody else. the constant fucking neverending stream of "xyz is so annoying" "omg finally someone said it i hate them too 😂" "theyre so embarrassing and make me feel homophobic/transphobic😂" (real funny joke btw) is so exhausting.

i really am just tapped out of social media. people (especially in western countries) act like lgbt oppression is basically no longer a thing because in Some countries there are Some lgbt rights. even though even in most 'progressive' countries those rights are constantly under attack. even though lgbt people still are being killed all around the world. people talk about being radical and yet they will not step up when someone experiences oppression because they were 'annoying'. lol. because they are constrained by their own embarrassment and cruelty.

whatever. i consider it quite pointless for me to say anything about this so i usually don't. because nothing i say will change anyones mind or behavior so im just speaking into the void.

i am happy when lgbt people are expressing themselves and idgaf if it's annoying or uncool. because im a fucking adult person living in a place where you cant even go outside as an lgbt person. 😐 social media is not safe and no one is to be trusted.

[kiwibongos]

im thinking so loudly about ibuki and fuyuhikos friendship. i think i will explode

i dont see it ever really talked about honestly, they had so much potential together as a duo. even after everything fuyuhiko had done, he genuinely showed remorse for everything (by the whole slitting his abdomen open especially) and ibuki knew that, she understood it, so she went as far as to throw him a whole party for his recovery because she cares, she believes he can be a better person bc she is STUPIDLY optimistic about everything. fuyu must've thought he didnt deserve all that kindness

iirc, i even think at some point in dialogue, ibuki says to hajime she was gonna go find fuyuhiko to bug him, and GOD i love the thought of that. fuyuhiko just going off alone often thinking about shit (you know, The Horrors) cause its not like he had anyone— but then ibuki finds him and follows him around because she doesn't want him to be alone.

i think theyd slowly become really good friends just unfortunately off screen. i think ibuki would personally and deeply understand his kind of feeling of loneliness and not really fitting in/being normal, though it may be in different ways, ibuki must've had a tough life as well, so she would cheer him up about it. theyre both a little fucked up and silly, its what ties their bond

and dude you cannot tell me fuyuhiko didn't try to help the others while they were sick during ch3, but most notably ibuki in this case. she had done so much for him with the party, he wanted to return the favor, he wanted to keep her safe especially with how she was wandering out her room

but his efforts failed in the end. when she died, that mustve fucked him up so badly. like. for a while

he'd lost peko and natsumi, everyone hated him, but he didn't let it stop him from trying to be better. but now, he lost ibuki, just when they were getting close (AND hiyoko, who he was trying to make up with, AND mikan which hurt him too bc i think he cared deeply for her too and tried to help her overall during the disease ordeal to give back as well, but thats a whole other post), its like everyone was being taken away from him right at his feet. i feel like he'd just try to avoid people permanently from that point on. (which didnt work obvi bc akane and hajime flicked his forehead and said Hey Bitch I Love You) but anyway. god. it was too early for those three to go dammit

god i want more of ibuki and fuyuhiko i eat it up sm. their friendship is everything to me. i think ibuki would stick around with him in the restaurant at breakfast, and they'd run around the islands (fuyu would be as slow as a snail bc he's still healing lol), fuyuhiko would put up ibukis hair for her, and theyd perhaps even spend some time in the music venue just jammin to the same rock music.. god. just let them be together