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ajrnal · 2 years

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A Man Called Otto (2022) : A Personal Note

I don’t really know how to review a movie, let alone any types of media out there, but I'm badly want to write something about this one. Therefore, I'll do my best to write everything I thought based on MY watching experience, and minimize any act of over-spoiling.

First of all, it's important to note that this movie will came off triggering as the one of the main themes being suicide ideation, so there are several scenes that depicts related act of it after episodes of indignation and grieving from Otto - the main character - hence this movie might be not for everyone. But it didn't stop me from enjoying it as the majority of this movie is all about learning to move forward in life, and acknowledge that there's still people out there who cares about you.

The whole movie will be a roller coaster ride of emotions. It's both heartwarming and heartbreaking. There are comedy, so it's guaranteed to laugh, then followed by tears streaming, back and forth. At first, my biggest motivation(s) to watch this movie is:

Basically Tom Hanks himself, because I know if he's in there, the movie will be good (and it turns out being great as I expected!).

The promotion poster and the synopsis that my local theater serve promising a found-family trope.

I was unfamiliar with the rest of the cast, but gotta admit most of them are marvelous actors/actresses. Along the way, I eventually fell in love with Mariana Trevinõ and her bubbly role of Marisol, along with the character of Jimmy - played by Cameron Britton - despite his screentime, but I'm weak for happy-go-lucky friendly young adult neighbor! At the end, I still can feel the 'found-family' vibes that I was aiming, so it's not entirely disappointing (again, personally!). Another thing that I like about this movie is the amount of social critics and satire that is too relatable with current society. It will easily being noticed throughout the movie.

Last but not least, I love how they wrap up the story properly, although I personally still need a second watch as I feel like some details are missing. The movie is slow, but rushed at the same time for me? Also, a lot of scenes in the movie manage to haunt me, both in a good and bad way. Nevertheless, I still highly recommend this to add into anyone's watchlist. I honestly want to experience watching this like it’s my first time again. It's really THAT beautiful! I also just found out this were adapted from a book written by Fredrik Backman and it has its own movie adaption in Swedish with the same title "A Man Called Ove". So might gonna try watching the Swedish movie and read the real book later!

My overall score for this movie:

8.5/10!

#movie review #a man called otto

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kitcatimezz · 2 years

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Okay this is all very random, but I just finished Brooklyn 99 for the 2nd time this month (yes I know copoganda shit LET ME LIVE IN A SIMPLE FANTASY WORLD OF GOOD POLICE, BAD CRIMINALS, AND FOUND FAMILY OKAY) and I NEED to rant about it. I'm just gonna point out my favourite relationships in the show (not in order)

- I LOVE Jake and Holt's relationship. It's mentioned jokingly throughout the series, but Captain Holt really is the father figure Jake so desperately needed. When the series started, Jake was an immature manchild who would eat candyburritos for breakfast, be in crushing debt due to barely understanding how bills worked, and who ran on complete impulse at all times. Having gone through his parent's messy divorce, his dad being Da Worst and his mom seemingly absent, he had few people around to show him how to be... a functioning adult. And then Holt comes in. Already fully grown up to a comical degree, married, captain of a precinct, overly interested in classical music and globe collecting. Yet, he too had had his struggles, being a gay black detective in the 80's and 90's was hard, and we can see how hardened and serious it made him. Throughout the series, the two constantly put their back into helping each other out of bad situations, for no other reason but because they care about each other. Holt gives Jake advice and guidance, an example, but Jake also forces Holt to have fun, ending in Holt even cracking jokes sometimes, and also forcing him to face more emotions, like when he made the captain talk to his mom, or during fights with his husband. In the last episode, Holt tells him how he heard how Jake could deduce any case, except the one about growing up, and how, if he'd had a son that turned out the way Jake did, he would be very proud. That genuinely brought tears to my eyes...

- One of the few couples in anything life action, Jake and Amy. I won't dive too deep into it, but ahg they are the best. Sure, in the beginning it was the classic 'pulling pigtails is flirting' tactic, but even then all the teasing is genuinely friendly, like yes Jake might make fun of Amy, but it never crosses a line, and he's overall genuinely supportive and trusting of her. Even when he starts to like her while she's dating someone else, he's honest about everything without it ever making it her problem. I love how when they finally start dating, their characters don't change much. You know the trope of 'high strung woman needs to find a man to go loose'? This show says no and instead makes it that every nerdy type A thing Amy does is actually something Jake (and the others) like about her, in the same way that Jake can still be a goofball with her and still make it feel like they fit. I love how much Jake is willing to sacrifice for her, how it pushes him to grow, how they're always honest with each other, how Amy starts using Jake's catchphrases casually, how they make an effort to understand each other's interests. Their wedding was amazing, and having watched it as many times as I have, I sometimes notice them wearing identical rings, even in episodes where they're split up and don't interact, it's just casually there. I was genuinely invested in them wanting and eventually getting a kid. And then at the end, when Jake decides to be a stay at home dad to be with his ' little buddy', letting his wife now chief be their main income, sure its progressive, but it doesn't feel forced, it really fits in their arcs. It was so cute how they constantly reaffirm that they're a team together. It's just so cute bro, I want them to be my parents, please give me healthy standards for relationships!!!

- Also, Amy and Rosa are best friends!! There's one episode in the beginning where Amy tries to compete with Rosa over something, and Rosa tells her to quit it, they're the only female detectives around, they gotta have each other's backs. And they DO!! during one of the heists, Rosa joins on Amy's team and is all ready for all her dorky overpreparing, when Rosa gets impulsively married within a week, she counts on it that Amy can throw it all together in the short time. There's an episode where the two of them catch some criminal together, and it is so cooool!! And then in that last episode, how they cling glasses and say 'I'm glad I could spend my time here with you' before saying some genuine 'I love you's' in a completely platonic but such an important way. It just feels so genuine, how Amy so clearly admires Rosa's strength, and how Rosa's as tough as she is, yet still has that clear soft spot for Amy.

- Also Jake and Rosa! their episodes together are usually the best when it comes to the cases. With others, it usually centers around the relationships, but Jake and Rosa are so passionate about being detectives, the case is the core, through which they then learn some emotional lesson and connect. I love how they've been friends for years, yet it's never even considered that one could have potential romantic feeling to the other just because 'boy and girl'. They're just completely platonic and seeing them work and support each other is always amazing. I loved how supportive Jake was of her when she was coming out, how they're always super supportive of each other. And then in the last season when Rosa leaves the police to become a PI to investigate police brutality, while jake himself was still with the police. I loved how they handled the conflict between the two, while still remaining friends in the end.

- Also, Rosa and Charles! In the beginning, it was the lame 'guy pining after girl out of his league trope', and I remember watching it the first time and rolling my eyes at it. But then, Charles actually gets over it, and they become genuine friends. Like, they get genuinely close and casually laugh together and support each other and all that. I love how Rosa asked him as a bridesmaid that one time, and whenever Charles calls her 'RoRo'

- Also, Holt and Amy's! Yes Holt is a father figure to Jake, but he's something similar to Amy. At the start, Amy is completely desperate for any kind of validation from an authorised person, and she often tries too hard to please, they sometimes felt a bit one-sided. But over time she grows less insecure and at the end is able to casually have an argument with someone she seemingly worshipped in the beginning. I like how Holt often acknowledges that he intends to mentor her, how he's the first to see her dream of becoming Captain and is all ready to lead her to that, and how much she looks up to him.

- What else can I say, uh... Jake and Charles! I love how much Charles cares about Jake (sometimes a bit too much maybe) and you see Jake being a bit uncomfortable with this at times. And sometimes it seems to be kinda one sided, but then the next the two of them talk it out and we see how much Jake genuinely cares about his friendship with Charles, and it seems that he just has a harder time with casual affection like that.

- Also in the last season, Holt and Kevin!! I'd been waiting and anticipating a Vowel Renewal since that one episode, but I didn't expect a full season long arc of a failing marriage being picked up again because even though things are hard they love each other!! And then Amy and Rosa bringing them back together in the rain!! Holt being ready to give up his job, only for Kevin to say he never wanted him to sacrifice that much, how they're so willing to give for each other. It was so gooooodd!!

- Oh oh!! And PB and J! Pontiac Bandit, aka Doug Judy, and Jake!! The cop and the criminal who promises to help catch another criminal before going to jail, only to slip away himself in the last moment. Their friendship is so good and I understand its a one episode a season deal but Damn those episodes are always in the top and I wish we had more. And then how they ended it, how Jake 'accidentally' gave him a way out of prison after finally catching him.. I died bro. So cute.

All in all, love this show. Watched it at least 10 times. Will watch for another 30 or so!!

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redrobin-detective · 3 years

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reading your ben-rook meta like >> *insert they hated jesus because he told the truth meme* except im the 'they' here,, canon already has found family separated trope 😭😭 !! let me stay ignorant!!

One of the first things I knew before starting OV from the posts and memes was that Ben/Rook were super tight and practically soul mates. And yet I got through one series after another and I just couldn't see it. They argued and clashed and such obvious tells (Ben's slacker joker persona clearly covering up his insecurities and Rook still being slightly awestruck/intimidated by Ben's fame and power) were missed by each other.

Look how much more comfortable, if a bit awkward with time and distance, Ben was with Gwen and Kevin? He never got to that same level with Rook bc he was hurt and he knew that this whole partnership was temporary, an attempt to keep him in line. And he was right but that doesn't mean they didn't care for each other but does that matter if you never speak of it? If you never acknowledge it? Can you really be friends if neither of you ever admit to it?

My heart hurts so bad for them.

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jamlocked · 4 years

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C, J, U, V and X :))

C - A ship you have never liked and probably never will.

Ohhhh, boy. I could go three ways on this really...or maybe two, idk. I feel like my answer will be taken as problematic - - and I’m going for it anyway, because it’s just my opinion.

The ship I dislike the most is Sherlolly. It’s not because I don’t like Molly - I do, a lot. It’s not because that would make Sherlock straight or bi - the whole argument that used to fly about that Sherlolly = homophobic is fucking gross. It’s just not a ship that does anything for me. I used to think that I just found it boring (and this is NOT me saying that Molly is boring, or het romance is boring, or any of that), but I’ve come to realise it’s mostly because it vibes with the part of Sherlock’s narrative I like the least. The whole, ‘Sherlock was weird and abnormal with no friends, but now we’re going to turn him into a complete human being’, thing. Which, VOMIT.

Again, I’m not saying that het romance is too ‘normal’ to fit here. Sherlock could have a massive thing with Irene, and that would have a vibe I like far more. The issue I have with Sherlolly is that Sherlock has always been an extreme type of character in whatever canon. Molly, in BBC canon, is this wonderful character Sherlock came to find a great friend in. The notion that he could ‘learn to be normal/complete’ seems to be the arc of the four seasons, complete with the whole ‘I love you’ scene in TFP, where they full dangled the possibility of future!canon!Sherlolly by at least making Sherlock think about it seriously. It seems to equate with ‘the more we teach Sherlock to fit into ‘normal’ society, the more chance he has of having a ‘normal’ relationship, with someone...’ - okay, I’m not going to hold Molly up as a bastion of normality, given she falls for sociopaths and does autopsies, but even if you take that into consideration, it’s still the most ‘normal’ relationship the writers could put him into. A casual viewer would go, ‘he’s got a girlfriend now, he behaves better, he gets on with his family, he’s straight/white/upper middle-class = totally a character I’m easy with’.

And that’s just not what interests me when it comes to relationships I want to watch. Now, if we’re talking about dark!Molly who’s into Glee and cats, but also runs a black market organ business and wants Sherlock to help sort out the competition - I’m totally here for that. If Molly likes her knitted cardigans and secretly wants to kill Sherlock, while he likes his suits and is madly in love her but also wants to use her to get to her criminal mother who harvests dead bodies and practices necromancy? I’m all ears.

But ‘Sherlock gets a girlfriend, solves crimes, learns manners and is never obnoxious again, and OH LOOK WE FIXED HIM’ - fuck, no. ...that was a lot of words, and I didn’t explain it very clearly, but I’ma stop now.

J - Name a fandom you didn’t think about until you saw it all over Tumblr. (You don’t have to care about it or follow it; it just has to be something that Tumblr made you aware of.)

Tumblr has made me aware of BTS, The Witcher (although I had seen adverts for that on Amazon, but idk anything about it), Hamilton, Moomin, MASH, The Mentalist, Kyo Dir en Grey, Elementary ...oh man, there must be more, but I forget. I’ve been here a few years now. I’d heard of most of these shows/people before Tumblr, of course, but didn’t know much about them. And still don’t on some of them, but am definitely aware of them now.

U - Three favorite characters from three different fandoms, and why they’re your favorites.

Jim Moriarty, obviously. HE IS SO FUN. And there is such pain under the smirk, and THOSE SUITS, BABY. I am the biggest sucker in the world for obsession, and ...well, see my answer to X in a minute. There’s nothing about him I don’t ove. So much scope to play with in fic as well.

An old fandom of mine - Les Mis. My fave character is Javert, because of course I love the most awful dick of them all. Again, with him, see X below. And also again, so much to write about. I literally nearly based a PhD proposal around him, and his representation, his place in 19th century France, his attitudes and where they came from. Did you know the character of Sam Gerard in The Fugitive is based on him? He’s relentless, he’s unforgiving, and he collapses at the end in the most spectacular way possible. Total prick, and I fucking love him. :D

I’m really trying to think of character I love who isn’t a total douche, just for the sake of variety. But I can’t, so lets go with Gene Hunt from Life on Mars.

I expect most people won’t have heard of/seen this show (but omg they might be making a new series, sa;ldfkjsalfksj I CANNOT :D), but if you can watch it, you should. Gene Hunt is awful - a 70s cop with all the faults of the time. Corrupt, mostly alcoholic, sexist, violent, homophobic, racist...but also hilarious, and there’s a really big heart under there. You learn that he might do nothing but call people the worst names in the world, but he always ends up doing his job in. If you watch this four minute video, you’ll get the gist. If you’re a fan of the Discworld series and you like Sam Vimes, you’ll recognise Gene. He’s the arshetype of Copper, and he goes on this great arc from being the stereotypical bad copper of the 70s, to being something quite different. And he really is hilarious, with insane charisma. He and Sam Tyler are the perfect double act. :D

V - Which character do you relate to most?

Jim Moriarty. I may not be a criminal mastermind, but only because I’m not that smart. And don’t have his level of swag, because c’mon. Who does?

X - A trope which you are almost certain to love in any fandom.

AHAHA. My bulletproof trope is ‘two sides of the same coin’. Sherlock/Moriarty. Javert/Jean Valjean - who, incidentally, were two characters based off one man; Vidocq. (A man who more films should be made about, incidentally.) These two are literally two sides of one man. Even Gene Hunt represents part of Sam’s psyche in Life on Mars, as well as the more obvious old vs new, forensic vs gut instinct.

But yeah, in literally any fandom, you show me a protagonist and an antagonist that are more or less the same person, and I’m there. Cannot get enough of it.

#anti-sherlolly #sherlock #life on mars #les mis #javert #fandom #all about meme #omg that got so long I'M SORRY

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bryanastar · 3 years

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How I (Accidentally) Write About Dark Subject Matter: Rough & Tumble Ramblings (Bonus Post)

I don’t like writing content warnings, not because I’m one of those losers that think they aren’t needed (because, believe me, they definitely are) but because it means I have to step back from my work and think about what the hell I just wrote. Now, in my teen writer eyes, there is nothing more embarrassing than thinking back to what you wrote and realizing that you need five different content warnings to fully prepare the reader for your work, and also remembering that you’re barely a rising Junior in high school. I end up having an out of body experience where I see myself and my work as a long and beleaguered r/I’m14andthisisdeep post, and it can make it hard to read back over my work to edit and submit.

Not that there’s anything wrong with darker subject matter. In fact, some of my favorite work to read contains some particular dark and disturbing content. But when you’re a young writer trying to submit your stuff, it can feel… a bit embarrassing. You feel like the stereotypical edgelord teen writing about edgy stuff for the sake of making the adults cry with your edgy edge.

The thing is, I don’t even intend to write about dark subject material ninety-nine percent of the time. It’s just a natural consequence of my intuitive (and rather impulsive) writing process.

I feel that—when it comes to writing about heavier content as a teen writer—there are two types of people: the ones who write about dark content on purpose, and the ones who write it by accident.

I think @shaelinwrites said it best when she wrote in a blog post that teens are often attracted to darker subject matter due to being at the age where we realize that the world is a far darker and scarier place than what we saw as children. Writing, therefore, is the safest way to explore this newfound knowledge and come to terms with it. This is why young writers who write dark subject matter on purpose do it.

But some, like me, do it on accident.

Let me explain. So I’m rather sheltered, as I suspect a lot of teen writers are. I’m not exactly the most world-weary person, despite knowing that the world is, objectively, pretty screwed up. Due to this, I can often add, on accident, some pretty screwed up material just for not thinking it through deeply enough.

For example, here was was my general thought process for my short story “Judith was Never Adopted”, a story that is, objectively, a about a young teenage girl getting left behind in the foster care system due to going through puberty and not being “adorable” any more, getting sexualized while in puberty, getting forcibly married to an older guy who sees her as an object, all the while desperately trying to reclaim the childhood she’s lost and feeling lied to by all the media that claimed that she’d have a lovely and charmed life after being adopted by rich and happy parents (also, spoilers):

“Gee, isn’t it funny that orphan girls in children’s books are often adopted by nice, rich families and get whole musicals dedicated to them, while orphans in YA and Wattpad books are often paired up with the older, assholic, ‘bad boy’ and probably have their lives ruined?”

“Wait… that’s a cool idea for a story!”

“How do I make the villain as awful as possible…? I know! He’s a twenty year-old gangster who has no scruples when it comes to hitting on teenagers, and he also has no problem with busting the kneecaps of literal orphans! That’ll really emphasize how crappy he is!”

“Why did the main character never come back for Judith? Uh… he was in the Iraq War? But why would he willingly join that conflict? Oh right! To pay for college! And he loses an arm, because the war has to have some consequence.”

“But why doesn’t he go to find her when he gets back? Well, uh, his foster mother is dead and his foster siblings are gone, so he has bigger crap to worry about first cause now he’s homeless. Also, the gangster left the city anyway and took Judith with him, and nobody really knows where they went.”

“There! Now to look over the draft! Wait… what the fuck have I written?!”

If this all sounds thoughtless… it’s because it is. To be fair to me, I usually realize pretty quickly that what I’m writing is dark and messed up (by, like, the second paragraph of this story, I really thought long and hard about it’s concept and went “oh shit”).

From there, I usually try my best to do right by the themes and concepts I accidentally introduced, mostly because it’s content that usually gets glossed over in other books that include it, or that is otherwise even romanticized! In fact, it’s anger at these storylines and characters not being treated well that usually inspires me to write the story in the first place!

I’d actually say I did a pretty decent job with this story considering that the first magazine I submitted it to accepted it a day later and praised the piece for its “insights into the psyches and circumstances of foster children.” And this was an adult-run magazine too—with adult contributors with MFAs in creative writing that should be able to write circles around me and my story ideas! They had no reason to be more forgiving of my piece just because I was a young writer! They had plenty of adult ones to pick from!

So yeah, I can be pretty blind to my own story’s content until it’s time to write, at which point I usually stubbornly try to stick with it. Part this is, again, just because I’m sheltered, but I think another reason I do this is because, like I mentioned earlier, I write about stuff that is usually conveniently ignored or downplayed in other works—especially children’s stories.

To give an example, let’s look at one of my favorite childhood movies: Matilda. Objectively, the plot of Matilda is about a severely neglected and abused kindergartener overcoming her abusive family with her equally abused and traumatized teacher, all the while forming a tiny found family with said teacher and moving on from their dark pasts together. Remove the magic and this isn’t a children’s movie; it’s a litfic novel that I know at least one person on this goddamn hell site it writing (not that that’s a bad thing).

Part of the, I guess, novelty of the work that I write is that I enjoy writing about tropes commonly found in children’s stories and contrasting them with I see as toxic or harmful tropes found in works for older teens. As a person who basically went straight from reading children’s literature to adult litfic, I’m fascinated (and somewhat horrified) by the difference in themes and ideas presented to children versus older teens—especially since those same themes and tropes seen in children’s fiction seem to bizarrely reappear in work aimed toward adults (A Man Called Ove is basically UP but without the magic—change my mind). The main difference between how adult fiction treats these subjects and how children’s fiction treats them is that adult fiction fully shines a light on how messed up these subjects are, while you can get away with writing about literal Nazis and genocide in children’s fiction (*cough* Avatar the Last Airbender *cough*) and have no one think it’s too dark or try to tone it down.

Due to this, I think I’ve already been conditioned to not see these subjects to be as bad as they really are, until I sit down to write about them and start to think about them more deeply! Looking back, I’m sure I could’ve written about the subjects outlined in my short story in a way that’s conducive to children’s fiction. Heck, you already have some of the base tropes: over-the-top villain, sad wittle orphans, and deep childhood friendships. Written in another way, I could’ve been the next Roald Dahl!

I’d also like to point out that I have nothing against these themes being explored in literature for younger audiences—in fact I think it’s necessary to teach children about these issues early. But I do think how we perceive certain media to be “kid-friendly” can cause us to forget how deep and nuanced the content in this “kid-friendly” media usually is, mostly due to much of the content having to be toned down as to not scar younger audiences (which is also important). The problem isn’t that this media is included; the problem is that we can sometimes forget how important these issues really are because they’re such common tropes in children’s fiction, which is a great disservice both to these issues and to the stories that include them!

This is also an issue present in YA media, but in a different way as some of toned down issues present in YA are executed in such a way that is actively harmful to teenagers (from the abusive and controlling “bad boy”, to the toxic “not like other girls” character that disparages femininity and promotes competition rather than support among girls). These are my favorite tropes to explore and tear apart in my own work because, when not viewed through a glorified or romanticized lens, they can actually form extremely compelling fiction due to the fallout caused to surrounding characters who have to deal with the bull these tropes and characters cause.

Of course, playing these tropes for what they are tends to lead to darker fiction by consequence, but, due to so many of these tropes being ironically extremely present in children’s and YA literature, many teens that aren’t myself also end writing about them because, really, they’re just writing what they know. This is how an entire generation of teen writers, including myself, ends up writing about content far darker than they realize by accident. We’ve been reading about these subjects for a long time, and now we’re just copying from the masters.

Wow, that was a long rant. Was any of it sensical? I don’t really know, but I still enjoyed writing it!

That’s all for now! See you next Tuesday for your regularly scheduled writing update!

#rant #essay #teen writer #young writer #creative writing #writeblr #writblr #bonus post

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accidental-rambler · 8 years

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Play With Fire

AN: So I know Nessian training together has been probably done many times but it’s a trope I can’t get enough of (PLEASE LET US READ ABOUT IT IN ACOWAR).

Post ACOMAF. Slightly nsfw but nothing major. Hope you enjoy ;)

Comment on AO3 here if you’d like ;)

Air knocked out of his lungs, Cassian finds himself on the floor, pinned down by the pair of delicate, yet incredibly strong hands.

She managed to distract him. Again.

“Point for me.” The corners of her lips - their rosy shade and the luscious curve of them being the exact cause of his distraction - tip slightly upwards, flicker of satisfaction simmering in the blue of her eyes.

He should be annoyed at himself, at the way Nesta’s so easily won this round but the feeling is overshadowed by the intoxicating smell that hits his nostrils, poppies and honey and something else that he can’t exactly pinpoint. Loose curl escapes her bun and brushes against his cheek as she looms above him, her small frame fitting perfectly against his body.

Their eyes meet and Cassian observes the amusement fade away from her features, can almost feel the breath that hitches in her throat. Nesta’s grip on him loosens and she doesn’t seem to notice as one of his hands rises - slowly, carefully - to twine the unruly lock of hair around his fingers.

He’s well aware there’s something brewing between him and Nesta, has been for a very long time. After Hybern, they were both just so...angry, so lost.

Cassian, with wings that were almost ruined and healing painfully slow, too slow for the warrior, too slow when his High Lady, his friends were out there, fighting the war. And Nesta, this brave and unrelenting woman, trapped in a Fae form - made into something she had learnt to hate throughout her whole life. With immense power rippling through her veins and threatening to swallow her whole.

They were both lost but somehow, in the midst of chaos and blood and war, they found each other. They sought each other out.

Because it wasn’t comfort of their friends and family that they needed. It was arguments and vicious snarls and sparring matches - verbal and otherwise - that made them fight back.

And now, when he’s realized how his blood stirs and rushes through his veins at her proximity, that ineffable tinge in Nesta’s scent calling to him - Cassian wants to fight for more.

With a huff, Nesta yanks away his hand and the moment breaks. She moves to pull back but stops when he loops his fingers around the belt of her fighting leathers, her eyebrow quirking up in question.

“Care to make it interesting, Nesta sweetheart?” he purrs, satisfied with the shiver that crawls over her skin as his words reverberate against her throat.

He’s dreamt of the subtle arch of her neck and fantasized of sinking his teeth in the valley of her shoulders too many times to count.

“Interesting how?”

“How about a wager?”

A smile that forms on her face is a mocking one. “How is that interesting? So far I’m kicking your ass. Something distracting you, general?” she adds, tightening the grip of her thighs around his hips.

Gritting his teeth, he tries to ignore the heat pulling in his lower abdomen and says, “You shouldn’t have a problem with making a bet then.”

Her mouth is pursed but twitching slightly, as if she’s trying not to respond to the challenge. But after months spent together, Cassian has learnt a thing or two about Nesta and knows how to push her buttons. “Unless you’re afraid you’ll lose?” He taunts, his tone sipping with ‘misguided Illyrian cockiness’ as the woman lying in top of him likes to call it.

She looks at him from under her lashes, her regal features seemingly unmoved as she bits out, “Stakes?”

She’s in. Hook, line and sinker.

It’s a strain to keep his expression unchanged when something in him calls to her with every cell in his body, his blood thrumming in harmony with her heartbeat.

Nesta.

(Beat, beat, beat)

Come play with me.

(Beat, beat, beat)

“If I win, you’ll allow me to take you out. Show you my Velaris. From dusk till dawn,” Cassian states his conditions, flashing her his signature grin after he notes how she narrows her eyes at him. “What about you?”

“You have nothing I want. Satisfaction of beating you up will be enough.” Nesta’s words are crisp and short as she pulls herself up and looks at him expectantly. “Well? Get up. Let’s get this over with.”

“Yes, let’s,” he drawls, his eyes never leaving hers as he stands up. “I cannot wait to collect on my win.”

“You wish.” With no warning, she throws the first punch, so swift that he barely blocks it.

His chest swells with pride at her skill. She’s come so far.

“Oh, I wish many things, Nesta Archeron. And then I get them.” He dodges her next few strikes.

Anger flares in her eyes and Cassian can feel a thrum of her power in the air but Nesta manages to control it, to pull it all back and focus on hand-to-hand combat. “Less talking, prick.”

“How milady wishes.” He bows his head, lips twisted in a half-smirk. The gesture irritates his opponent even more and that’s when Cassian chooses to pounce forward, his attack almost successful if it weren’t for Nesta sidestepping at the last second.

They begin the sparring match, or maybe it’s a dance, a clash of two forces and neither wants to yield nor bend. Nesta’s lithe and graceful and agile as she moves, her smaller build making her quicker with her steps than he is. But Cassian makes up the difference with raw strength of his muscles - not to mention centuries of practice that he has going for him.

Minutes pass and the room fills with their laboured breathing, a temperature of air rising and sweat settling on their skin. It’s an even fight for quite some time but in the end, Cassian is older and stronger while Nesta is still growing into her skin. He catches the subtle signs that she’s struggling; a slight furrow of her brows and tightness around her mouth, the tensing muscles. He can tell that it’s her steel determination and unrelenting spirit and iron will that keep her standing straight, that guide her hands to hit its mark and prompt her limbs to move quicker, better than him.

His heart swells with pride and it’s an euphoric and alarming and confusing as hell and more than that, it makes what’s he’s about to do that much harder.

Because with that fire burning inside of her, Nesta might be able to do anything she puts her mind too but -

But she cannot win this fight.

He’s found a weak spot, a fairly insignificant one, but it will do. She’s started favouring her left side minutes ago and now that it’s become evident, it’s time to take advantage. Gradually, he stops parrying Nesta’s blows, allowing her to back him into corner. Arousal stirs in his veins at the victorious satisfied glint in her eyes and he loses his concentration for a second, imagining all the other ways he could bring that satisfaction to her gaze. His wings, safely tucked in for the duration of their sparring, are bursting to emerge, are itching to be touched, to be petted.

It almost costs him the win as Nesta wedges herself between his legs and gets a solid grip on shoulders, using her enhanced strength trying to bring him down. She’s inches from succeeding and Cassian swears - this woman is going to be the death of him.

“Not so cocky now, are you?” She grins in answer to his deepening scowl as he’s straining to keep himself standing.

He remembers his plan though, noting with relief that Nesta’s attack left her right sight unprotected. With efficiency of moves that can only come from experience, Cassian deflects her grip with a pivot that sends her tumbling to the floor, his body following hers as his hands dart out to cradle her head and cushion it against the fall.

It’s an instinct, really.

“I win.” His voice lacks the usual smugness as he pins her to the floor. “I’ll meet you in the House of Wind tomorrow evening.”

She wriggles under his body, her eyes shooting daggers at him. “Fuck you.”

A chuckle leaves his mouth at the insult. “Not on a first date, sweetheart,” he feigns offence. “You’ll have to work for it.”

Her knee jerks up but Cassian swiftly dodges the hit, amusement dancing in his eyes as he stands up. He offers his hand to help Nesta up but the gesture is met with an angry huff. She’s a vision, with her tangled hair and those blazing eyes and he -

He hasn’t been that turned on in a very long time.

But it’s a dangerous line they walk on and he’s got a plan - or more like a war strategy, really - so he does the right thing and backs away. “Till tomorrow, Nesta Archeron,” he croaks out, his throat suddenly dry.

Pivoting on his feet, he turns to the door. It seems like he’s hyper-aware of her every move, of her eyes fixed on his back in what is probably her signature deadly glare.

He’s not aware enough, though.

A crack, a swish of air and her muttered words - ‘this isn’t over’ - are what Cassian manages to register before he finds himself pressed against a hard surface yet again. With his back to the wall, he can’t help but inhale Nesta’s scent, the smell of her hair that tickle his jaw. He could probably escape her grip but before he has a chance to do so, she grabs his neck and pulls him forward and -

Her lips taste divine.

They’re warm and hungry and as agile as her combat moves, leaving Cassian breathless. She’s standing on her tiptoes, her touch bruising as she holds onto his neck and his own hands skim down her slim body, brushing past the curves of her breasts. He palms her ass and she bites on his lip in return, eliciting a guttural groan that she quickly swallows with more kisses.

Finally, Cassian’s hands reach behind her thighs and he props her up, switching their positions and pushing her against the wall at the same time. To his surprise, Nesta doesn’t oppose. No, she hooks her legs around his waist and grinds onto him - hard. She repeats the motion, again and again, moaning into his mouth each time his cock glides along her heated center, her fingers playing with the leather band tying his hair and the loose curls that escaped from its hold.

Cassian’s going crazy with the mixed scent of their arousal flooding his senses and her chest pressed to his and then her lips leave his but only so she can nibble on his earlobe, her tongue smoothing the bite of her teeth and his wings are in full spread now, just begging to be touched.

He honestly considers begging her to touch them, to run her nimble fingers along the edges, have her delicate hands pet the membranes just so he can have some relief from this pain of wanting her, of this craving to be consumed by this fire that burns between them when their eyes meet.

He’s on the verge of mumbling it all to Nesta when -

The pressure of her grip around his neck and waist disappears and then her hand lands on his chest, pushing him away and -

Nesta’s struggling to breathe, her cheeks tinged with pink and her gaze feverish as it settles on him but there’s a triumphant smirk curving one corner of her mouth upwards.

Before she even opens her mouth to speak, Cassian knows two things.

One, he might have won the bet but he’s just lost this round. And two -

He’s going to need a shower. A freezing one.

“Till tomorrow, Cassian,” she drawls before making her exit.

Leaning against the wall, he lets out a painful groan. There’s only one thought swirling in his mind as this woman - this cruel, maddening, exquisite creature - leaves him more frustrated than he’s ever been before.

It is so on, sweetheart. It is on.

#nessian #nessian fic #acomaf #acomaf fanfiction #nessian drabbles #my drabbles #nessian drabble #and we let it burn

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