#i just really don't know what to do with myself anymore

[galasdian]

And sometimes! Even when you don't ask!

I have lost track of how many times a stranger on the street has done something that made my life immeasurably better. every time I've gotten off of my fifth 16-hour shift in a row, and I decided it would be better to go pick up cat food before I went to bed instead of trying to convince myself to wake up later and the nice lady at the desk compliments my jacket and pretends that I'm not slightly incoherent and suggest I go across the street to the place that has the good chicken pot pies they are saving my life and they have no idea. Every time somebody has caught the elevator door for me. The lady who when she saw me struggling to try and call somebody with the pay phone asked me what was wrong and was able to direct me to a place I could plug my phone in so I could figure out how to hell to get home.

I know I have more examples they're just not in my head right now, but people are out there really just being so kind to each other as much as they're able when they know how . Kindness isn't dead people just aren't just comfortable knowing how to do it anymore.

>"nobody's gonna help you in the real world!!"

>go outside

>love and support in many places as long you have the courage to ask for it

[life-is-more-than-just-a-game]

♠️ AiB males in Mingle-Game with you ♠️

A/N: I thought about this kind of headcanons while I was trying to fall asleep. 😬

The game is part of the second season from Squid Game, so if you haven't seen it yet but want to watch it- This writing may contain slight spoilers! 😶‍🌫️

Characters: Aguni, Arisu, Chishiya, Karube, Niragi

POV: gn!neutral

Warnings: Squid Game related; may contain Spoilers for season 2!

A g u n i

That man really hates playing games with you together. He isn't showing, but he is afraid of losing you in one of those games especially when it comes to the thought of losing you 'cause he is not able to protect you ...

He has the will of a leader and he may be pretty strong, physically and psychologically, but not knowing which game you'll join together almost kills him ever and ever again.

That's why Aguni always tries his best to convince you to play different games but this time he lost the discussion.

Thanks god it's not heart game the two of you joined, but clubs.

Bro, that man breathes a sigh of relief, you wouldn't believe it.

No chances he will leave your side, he stands by you and follows you everywhere you go, no matter what.

And he is watching you the. whole. damn. time.

Standing on the circling plate, he will touch you with his elbow when you start moving your body because of the playing song.

"Don't forget, it's all or nothing. Stay focused and stop dancing, you need to concentrate."

... He is finding it pretty cute actually but who is he to confess?

Ah, the plate stops moving and the song stops playing. A voice tells the number of people each group needs before running in one of the rooms you need to hide to win this game.

Good for you, nearly everybody knows Aguni.

And nearly everybody is fine with whoever wants to build a group with them, I mean everyone is just trying to survive ...

"A group of 3 people?" "Can't be this hard to find one more- no time to lose!"

Be prepared, he will carry you over his shoulder without hesitation ... He just grabs you and flicks you over ...

"Wow, alright, calm down Aguni, I have legs myself, you know?!" "Daily dose of training."

A r i s u

Same as Aguni, Arisu wouldn't step away from your side, leaving you alone in the crowd of people you may or may not know by even their names.

He's a cutie pie. While standing on the moving plate, he would stand by you as near as possible, just to make sure he isn't losing you.

Plus he wants to make sure you know he will always be there for you and no matter what happens, he isn't going anywhere without you.

He lost the most meaningful people in his life already. It broke him. Losing you- it's hard to say if he would make it another time.

Still, different from Aguni , he wouldn't mind moving with you to the song a little.

Actually it would be pretty fun to him, dancing to the rhythm with you.

For a second he would forget why you guys are even here ...

Lord have mercy, he loves you for that.

If he is able to, he would even sing along, sadly korean doesn't belong to his strength ...

Freestyle!

"Love, did you even know what the children are singing about?" "Actually no, but this song is both a curse and a blessing."

People will look at you as if you are a couple that is losing their minds- how can you have fun with the knowing this could be your last minute on earth?

Seriously, how?

"Oh, the song ends ..." "And we aren't moving anymore ..." "2!", the unknown voice tells the players.

Arisu grabs your wrist, not thinking about it twice, and drags you behind him, towards the door closest to you.

"Oi, don't be so rough on me!" "Sorry, gamer reflexes!"

C h i s h i y a

The strategist of this game.

Nobody would find a sample in this game as fast as he does.

Play with him the first and second round, and he will be able to guess the number of group members for every following turn.

"They will do everything to kill as many people as possible." "You don't say." "It's important to know. Based on that, the numbers are chosen." "Are you really trying to find a ... system behind this game?" "I'm not trying, I already found it. Just stand near me and everything will be okay."

Remembering the last games you played with him, you know he is right.

At first it was hard for you to trust him. He was always a mysterious person to you- calm, smart, ambitious. That makes him ... kind of a dangerous person.

But since you started "dating" him, it gets easier for you letting him take control in games you play both together.

"Promise you bring us out here alive ...?" "Not a big fan of promises, but this ... this is easy to handle."

He takes your hand you held out to him when you asked him that question. But not just to give you his word- he interlaces his fingers with yours instead, pulling you a little closer to him and making sure you stand by him.

Your face gets red like a tomato ...

"You know, you make the games a little more important to me, Y/N." "Huh? What do you mean?" "Your life matters more to me than my own life- so I'm willing to protect you. Even though it's just with my high level of intelligence." "... Well, who are you and what have you done to Chishiya?", you laugh while he is just giggling a little.

K a r u b e

Fun is important to him, he doesn't want to think about dying the whole time.

So he doesn't want YOU to think of dying the whole time, too.

I guess Karube could be the one dancing with like crazy to the song. Not just moving his body back and forth.

More like Thanos and Nam-gyu did in the series ... I was laughing so hard when I saw them dancing on the plate. 😭

Back to topic; he just wants you to feel comfortable and, above all, safe around him.

He loves having you close to him. As long as you are with him, he is sure that he can do anything.

He is also willing to achieve everything he has set himself as a goal.

Accordingly, if he has made it his goal to leave the game with you ...

... then he WILL leave this game WITH you!

Means, without ifs and buts, he stays with you. From start to finish.

We know how impulsive Karube can be.

Anyone who stands in the way of him and his plans will never be happy again.

For example, the player who tried to push in front of him when you two were running in a room together.

Then he is simply grabbing the clothes and pulls the foreign person out of the room again- with force and full physical strength.

If the stranger is lucky, he gets away with a broken nose.

If not, he will die- Karube has no mercy for people blocking his way.

"Well, you know, it's not necessary always punching people in the face when they are just panicking and fighting for their lives, Babe ..." "I know, but I was panicking, too. And I want to live. And I want you to live, too, y/n. I want a future with you, not with a-" “Unknown human being!", you say, stopping him from uttering an insult. "You are too good for this world, love."

N i r a g i

Bro's kinda rough to everyone, not just you. We all know what a beast he can be, so when it comes to finding group members, he will use every method that comes to his mind to make people join both of you.

Niragi isn't good with words. He would provoke the other players or manipulate them making sure you and himself can leave this game alive.

Yeah ... he has a soft spot for you.

Can you imagine him having a heart!? 😭

Anyways, his life isn't as important as yours, for him at least.

That's doesn't mean he wants to die in here!

You are just his priority, so when the voice is telling a number and other players don't want him to join their group, he would do ANYTHING that you are able to join a group.

Yep, he would grab people by their collar.

And he would punch and kick them if necessary.

... His firearm could also be used.

"Listen here, you litte fuck. You will make sure that you team up with her and you will make sure that you end up properly in one of these ugly rooms, that she gets out of here alive. Otherwise-" Niragi points his gun at the unknown player, ignoring your "No, stop! Put that down, are you crazy?!"

Damn, he would kill everyone in here to make sure you will survive, it's insane ...

Funny to say, his method is working very well ...

[mixolya]

ᓚᘏᗢ — beneath the stars, we became one: chapter 023 !

"i'm sorry."

you looked at him, your mind swirling. rin wasn't the kind of person to apologize unless it was necessary, but hearing those words from him made everything feel .. off. there was something raw, something unspoken in his gaze; it was a side of him you hadn't seen before.

he sat there, his hand twisting nervously with the edge of his sleeve, his eyes focused on the ground, avoiding your gaze. should i apologize or let him speak?

he finally spoke, his voice softer than it had been the entire time you'd known him. "i'm sorry for everything. for the things i said, for how i pushed you away. i never should've acted like that. reo told me a bit about your past ... i didn't know, and i regret my words more than i can say."

his eyes met yours for a brief moment, and you could see the sincerity there. his expression was heavy with the weight of his apology. before you could answer, he continued, and his voice lowered even further, as if he were admitting something that he'd never planned on sharing.

"you weren't even part of my plans," he said, the words so so quiet, you thought you misheard him.

"what do you mean?" you asked, your brows furrowing as you tried to make sense of his confession.

"i wanted to focus on school and soccer," he explained. "i never expected to care for someone as much as i care for you. you change everything. and i don't even know what to do with myself anymore."

your breath caught in your throat, your heart melted. the rawness in his voice made it race. rin, always so composed, was here, breaking down his walls. the vulnerability in his words took you by surprised. again, you opened your mouth to say something, but before you could, he added, "i wasn't sure what love really felt like until i met you."

you didn't know what to say, didn't know how to process the emotions swirling within you. your heart was pounding in your chest, caught between everything he'd just said and everything you'd felt in your heart.

but the words didn't matter anymore. you couldn't hold back. you couldn't wait for him to keep explaining. you needed to feel him, to show him that you understood, that you felt the same way.

fuck it, you thought.

before he could continue, you leaned forward and kissed him. you felt his breath catch in his throat as you kissed him harder, your hands instinctively reaching for him. all the walls you'd built, the fears, the hesitations - they crumbled in that moment.

when you pulled away, you could feel the heat of his presence surrounding you. without thinking, you moved to straddle his lap, your eyes locking with his, the space between you closing in a way that felt so right. his teal eyes were mesmerizing, almost otherworldly, and the way they softened as they met yours made your heart ache.

rin itoshi is so so pretty.

for a moment, you simply stared at each other, your breath mingling in the quiet space. it felt as though time stood still, everything else in the world fading away. but then, the weight of everything that had been building up inside you spilled out.

"i'm so sorry, rin," you whispered, your voice trembling. "i- i distanced myself because i was scared. scared of getting hurt, scared of how much i yearn for you. i've been holding myself back for so long, afraid that i'd lose myself again."

your words faltered as your throat tightened, tears welling up in your eyes. "i didn't mean to hurt you. i'm sorry .. i didn't know how to deal with it. i don't know how to deal with this."

rin's expression softened, and before you could say anything more, he gently brushed away the tear that had fallen down your cheek. his touch was tender, his fingers lightly tracing the path where your tear had been.

"you don't need to apologize," he murmured, his voice low, soothing.

and without another word, he pulled you into a kiss again, but this time it was different- slower, more deliberate. his lips were gentle at first, almost as if he was savoring the moment. but then, as the kiss deepened, it became more urgent, more desperate, as if both of you were finally allowing yourselves to feel everything you'd been holding back.

the world outside of this moment ceased to exist. it was just the two of you, and everything else was forgotten in the heat of the kiss. your hands found their way to his neck, pulling him closer, while his hands found their way to your waist, pulling you even closer, as if he couldn't bear any distance between you.

the kiss deepened, a perfect blend of tenderness and longing. his hands were cold, which sent a shiver down your spine, and for a moment, everything else in the world faded away - no past, no fear, no regrets; only him and you, in this moment.

your heart raced in sync with his, each breath between the kisses a quiet affirmation of how much you needed this, how much you needed him. the tension that had built between you finally began to dissipate, replaced by relief, like a weight had been lifted from your chest.

when you finally pulled away, both of you breathless, rin's eyes locked onto yours, intense and full of meaning. you could see the emotions flickering across his face, the same raw vulnerability you'd felt in him from the start.

"i want you to be mine," you whispered, your voice thick with emotion, "selfishly, thoughtlessly, mine."

"then, can i be yours?"

chapter 022 > here > epilogue

back to beneath the stars, we became one !

a/n: is this the end guys ...

taglist: @byakgans @bluberrymochi17 @levihanmyotp @x3nafix @etojlee @chuuyalvover @reocidal @syarc0re @azinniyaa @vashyuu @rwbie @idexmids @giaalorine @modxbea @nensi @anqelkoz @sapph1r3x @yuukigyatgyat @morgyyyyyyy @azharyy @chaerinmin @thenightsflower @narcjsistx @totheseok @meekydeeks @aerisevx @imas1mpp @t3chn0chan @lincqx @jadelynnrr @beellu @elpo1111

© mixolya 2025. do not copy, remake or edit any of my works.

[malleusmaleficent]

i do theatre shit and it's to perpetuate an extremely niche genre of music because it needs more young people, or else it'll die out

but anyways, regarding writing for attention like. it's definitely a thing yk, like i explicitly started writing witch hammer (and my fic before that) thinking like: "this is a truly wretched combination of things, and it creates a combination so niche that i am pretty much the only person that would want to read it, and that's okay"

like that was exactly what happened when i wrote life's tangled skein, which got nearly zero interaction. but witch hammer turned out wildly differently, witch hammer caught on super hard (by my own standards anyways).

and like, let me tell you, writing these two things has felt VERY differently. like the way in which i engaged with both stories is different, life's tangled skein i had a very clear mission and i was trying to capture a particular feeling, for me specifically. like i wanted to see if i could write something to make myself feel a certain way. and i did, i think. nobody read it, but i succeeded and i was never once troubled by audience reception and i was never checking for new comments or new likes or whatever. i was never thinking how a plot point might affect people.

however, witch hammer is a very different story. i am telling you right now if i wrote the story i had set out to write, there'd be fujos howling at the moon or some shit they would be so upset LMAO and like. i don't really want to write what i had initially set out to write anymore, im just not in the headspace for that. i have enjoyed keeping it light, i like writing cute shit too much.

but also, i'd be lying if "but what will me readers think" weren't a consideration as well. like i don't really participate in fandom culture, so i wasn't really aware entirely, but some people take this shit DEATHLY seriously. and while i think that is extremely silly, right, if someone that takes it deathly seriously got invested in something i've wrote, i don't want to actively make their day worse yk.

and i am checking for new comments every day, and i am watching the like counter go up.

and i'll be honest, it does feel a bit less "pure" to me, whatever that means. i haven't unpacked what that means exactly, but that is how i feel. i want to know people like my writing, and i want people other than me to vindicate me spending so much time and effort on this very niche project of mine.

now part of this is timing, i started writing witch hammer just a few days before i got laid off from my full time job, so that put me in a weird headspace. the tremendous wave of positive feedback i got after the fact was very helpful and i'd fully admit i latched on to it for a few weeks as i tried to clear my head.

but i'm good now, and buddy i am still watching for new comments lol.

i dunno, it's a complicated thing.

i do write for attention, actually, because that's a normal reason to create art

[destroyerofgirls]

Im BEGGING for you to write about forcemascing a soft trans guy.. 🙏

Only cause you're begging :)

I'm so proud of you sweetheart, you finally admit that you're a boy. You took your first step. The only problem is how soft you are. No, sweetheart, I'm not mad. I'm just prepared to help you learn how to be more of a man.

I know, I know, guys can be sensitive. You're very sensitive, aren't you my good boy? Yeah you are, but you let people walk all over you, they treat you like shit. And you let them. Why do you let them?

Aww, sweetheart, I'm not blaming you. Really, I blame myself. I haven't taught you how to be a man yet. Everyone sees you as scum, they treat you like a baby, but I'm going to change that.

Be a good boy and take your clothes off for me. There we go. Such a good boy for me.

Y'know, I think it's time we start you on testosterone. Make that dick start growing, make your voice deepen, make you hairy.

You don't want to be hairy? Sweetheart there's nothing to be scared of, you'll still be smokin hot handsome. It's okay to be hairy. Do you know how many people get turned on by body hair? I'm not letting you shave anymore.

How would you feel about topping tonight? You don't know? Here, just use the strap I usually use. Mhm, roll a condom on. Good boy. Here, I'm going to lay down, put my legs over your shoulders. Now, you're going to push in, don't be scared, love, I can take it.

Aw, fuckk, good boy. Yeah baby, you're gonna fuck me nice and hard. We're going to keep doing this until you're good at it, okay?

Nice and slow, there we go. After this, we're going to go and buy you some new clothes. Mhm, we'll get you some more neutral colors, some clothes that fit you, some that are baggy, we'll even buy you some work boots.

Go a little faster. Fuck, that's good, you're doing good. Maybe we should change your hair to a more masculine look. How does that sound? We'll get you some shampoo that doesn't smell like a field of flowers. Replace that perfume with some nice cologne. Don't worry, we won't cheap out.

Faster, God, go deeper, please. Oh God, you got my submissive side coming out a bit, you're such a good boy. You're doing so well. You know what I want sweetheart? I want you to make me feel so so good.

Of course you're so good at it in those other days, but I want you to try it this way. We'll get you a new strap, we'll get you a new cock so you can fuck me. Yeah, you want that don't you? I know you do. Fuck, you want me to feel good. Don't you want to make me a submissive bitch more often? Fuck, I know you do, love, I want that too. We're going to have to practice a lot more. Fuck, fuck, fuuckk I'm going to cum baby. Keep going.

[blueberrybirdsworld]

Unspoken Attraction CL16

Well... finaly the smut part, I'm not used to write about it so feel free to give me feed back !

Let me know if you want to be add in the taglist :)

Warning : smut

Chapter 20: Morning of Desire

The soft light of dawn filtered through the curtains as Y/N stirred awake, her body wrapped in the warmth of Charles’s embrace. For a moment, she was disoriented, the events of the previous night a hazy memory. But the steady rhythm of his breathing against her and the protective arm draped over her waist brought everything rushing back.

Her cheeks flushed as she realized how close they were. She shifted slightly, trying not to wake him, but Charles stirred, his grip tightening instinctively.

“Morning,” he murmured, his voice husky with sleep. His eyes blinked open, meeting hers.

“Good morning,” she whispered, her voice soft and shy.

Neither of them moved, the closeness between them both thrilling and overwhelming. Charles studied her face, his fingers lightly brushing her waist as if confirming she was really there.

“Did you sleep well?” he asked, his tone unusually tender.

“I did,” she replied, her lips curving into a small smile. “You?”

“Better than I have in a long time,” he admitted, his gaze dropping briefly to her lips before meeting her eyes again.

The charged silence stretched between them until she finally broke it with a nervous laugh. “We’re really close right now.”

“Too close?” Charles teased, though his voice held a note of hesitation.

“No,” she said, shaking her head slightly. “Not too close.”

Charles’s hand moved, his fingers brushing her cheek gently. “Y/N” he murmured, his voice low and filled with unspoken desire.

Her breath hitched as she looked up at him, their faces inches apart. “Yes?”

“I need to tell you something,” he said, his gaze searching hers. “You driving me crazy and I don't know how long I can't hold myself from going even further with you anymore. Do you feel the same way I do? Because I can’t keep pretending, I really want this—you—right now.”

Her heart pounded in her chest. “I do, Charles,” she admitted, her voice trembling. “I’ve also wanted this for a long time, I want you.”

That was all he needed to hear. His lips met hers in a kiss that was both bold and passionate, months of longing pouring into that single moment. She responded eagerly, her hands tangling in his hair as he deepened the kiss, their bodies pressing closer together.

Charles shifted, gently rolling her onto her back as he hovered over her, his lips trailing from her mouth to her jawline and down to her neck. “You’re so beautiful,” he murmured against her skin, his voice thick with emotion.

Her fingers traced the lines of his back, her touch igniting sparks wherever it landed. “Charles,” she whispered, her voice barely audible.

He pulled back slightly, his forehead resting against hers as he caught his breath. “Are you still sure?” he asked, his eyes filled with both desire and restraint.

She nodded, her eyes locked with his. “Yes. I’ve never been more sure. Je te veux Charles.” (I want you Charles)

A small smile tugged at his lips. “Oh, so you are the type to speak French when you get turn on, good to know.” he jokes, tough his gaze betrayed just how much he liked it.

“It’s my native language, what do you want me to do, it comes more easily.” She responds back, a smile on her face.

“Oh, I know someone we will also come very easily if a do, that” To make a point, he slid his head under her (his) shirt and start kissing every single part of her body.

“Charles, putain...” (fuck)

“Can I take it off?” He asks about the shirt

“Only if you take it too”

In a sudden rush they both start to undress each other, sliding their hands in the others body, discovering new places and new parts to kiss and to grab. He notices this particular place in the crack of her neck that make her start moaning and humping so he continues his action, smiling to himself. They were only on their underwear now and both of their lower parts where heating from the tension and excitement. He slowly started to grump against her and she respond happily. They just look into each other eyes and get consumes by their desire.

“Charles, I can’t take it anymore, please, touch me do something but please I want you” She pleads.

And that sight only could make him cum: her under him, her upper body completely naked, her hair dishevels, her mouth slightly apart and her eyes full of wants.

So, he obliged to her needs and take off her panties. He start kissing her thigh then even higher until he is in front of her beautiful pussy “Putain” he can’t say any other things

“Tu es magnifique, ma chérie” (You're beautifull darling)With these words he starts kissiing her clit, slowly but intimately and she arches her back in response, saying his name even more loudly.

He then starts to had a finger, touching her slowly, making sure it felt alright for her, she nods and he start pushing his finger inside of her, then adding an other one speeding his action. Nothing could've made him prepared for her reaction: the way she looked, the way she sounds and felt, it’s was almost too much.

“Charles, so good, please more I'm going...” She doesn't have the time to finish her sentence he start diving even more deeper between her legs, his finger drenched in her juiced and his movement even more fast and eager to bring her to her orgasm. She is totally falling apart beneath him, her moans getting higher and her hand gripping his hair roughly. Quickly she reached her high, shaking and moaning under him and Charles couldn't take it anymore, he kissed her roughly while still fingering her slowler now, all the love and desire he have for her speaking in the kiss.

“Tu es incroyable mon amour” (You're increadible my love)

She starts to get over her orgasm when she notices the huge bulge in Charles pants, even a little stain in his underwear, so she holds her hand to grab him but he stops her kissing her on the cheek.

“You don’t have to if you don’t want, I’m satisfied with pleasuring you, mon amour”

“No Charles, please I want to make you feel good to” she responds “Get on your back”

Charles is slightly taken apart by her sudden confidence but he does what she says nevertheless.

“I have to tell you I don’t have condoms with me, love, didn't think we will...” He stops in his sentence becoming a little shy all of sudden

“I wasn’t thinking about that, love” she responds smirking

And when Charles was thinking that seeing her cum under him was the most beautiful thing in the word, nothing could have made him prepare for she did next: her slowly kissing his neck, his torso, his stomach and lower, bringing his boxer of him and letting his dick fall free in his stomack, already hard and leaking from pleasuring her.

“Putain, Y/N..” (Fuck Y/N)

When she takes him in her mouth, he feels like it was heaven, like he finally finds his place, it was the most exquisite things ever. She starts slow and then take him all in her mouth, slowly moving up and down. He couldn't resist the urge to grab her hair, like if he needs something to anchor himself into. He let out some small moans and groans then and there and that only encourage her to continue her actions on him, glad to make him feel this good with just her mouth. He was already turn on from seeing her coming around his fingers so she didn't have to do much to bring him close to his release.

“I’m close, love, I’m very close”

She looked at him, speeding her action, her beautiful eyes full of desire and that all what il takes for him to let go and finish inside her mouth with a loud groan.

She was perfect and he couldn't be happier, after that he start to holds her even closer and maybe pay her back once or twice for this incredible moment.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The morning sunlight was brighter now, streaming into the room as the couple lay tangled together in the sheets. Charles propped himself up on one elbow, watching her as she dozed peacefully beside him, completly naked against him. He reached out to tuck a stray strand of hair behind her ear, marveling at how beautiful she looked in the light.

Not wanting to wake her just yet, he slipped out of bed, pulling on a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt. He left the room briefly, returning a short while later with a tray of breakfast. Fresh croissants, fruit, and coffee filled the tray.

“Y/N,” he said softly, setting the tray down on the bedside table.

She stirred, her eyes fluttering open. “Good morning again” she mumbled, a sleepy smile spreading across her face.

“Good morning,” he replied, leaning down to press a kiss to her forehead. “I brought you breakfast.”

Her eyes lit up as she sat up, the sheets over her slipping slightly off her shoulder. Charles tried not to stare, but his heart raced at how effortlessly beautiful she looked.

“You didn’t have to do that,” she said, though her smile betrayed how much she appreciated the gesture.

“I wanted to,” he replied simply, handing her a cup of coffee.

They ate together in bed, sharing bites of fruit and stealing kisses between sips of coffee. The earlier tension had given way to a sense of ease, the knowledge that they were finally on the same page bringing a sense of peace to both of them.

“I could get used to this,” she admitted, leaning her head on Charles’s shoulder as she nibbled on a piece of croissant.

Charles smiled, pressing a kiss to the top of her head. “Me too, me too...” he said, his voice filled with conviction.

Taglist : @linnygirl09, @prttylight, @itsblowssoms, @leila-030304, @sltwins

[scoops-aboy86]

wc: 647 | Rating: T | CW: mentions of infidelity, technically hurt no comfort because I haven’t written the part where they make up | Additional Tags: future fic, famous Eddie Munson, past Steddie

Okay, look. The tv was on in the background, and Ross and Rachel were breaking up, and this happened in my head. I’m posting it for Fuck It Friday because fuck it. The only thing getting me through life right now is cough drops.

part 2

Hell of a Time at the Wake

“Yeah, haven’t had a drink or touched any drugs in five years, as of last month.”

“Oh wow, so that’s from before Corroded Coffin made it big.” The interviewer chuckles. “Usually it’s the fame and rehab that come first.”

“I prefer to think of myself more as regionally notorious, but sure. Never did the rehab thing, though.”

“Well, what’s the story there?”

Behind their frontman, the rest of the band shares a look. “Oh, we don't need to—” 

“Nah, Jeff, it’s okay man.” Eddie waves them off, then turns back to the interviewer. “Back before we hit the road to make a name for ourselves, I was seeing someone back home. I mean, the someone. The one. But we kept having this same… not really a fight, just this thing: I wanted to leave town, they didn’t. And then finally we had this huge blowout about it that started as something else and somehow turned into that again, which turned into both of us storming off. They went home, and I went out and got completely shitfaced, and in the morning I woke up with someone whose name I didn’t even know in bed with me.”

The interviewer winces. 

“Yeah. And when you do something shitty like that, it’s going to come out sooner or later. Or pretty much immediately, in this case, which.” Eddie grimaces and shrugs. “Well, it gave us something else to fight about, that’s for sure. I knew I’d fucked up bad, but it took hours of back and forth before I realized that we were done done. Trust completely obliterated, no way to come back or move on from that, just… over.”

There’s a pause where he stares off into space for a moment, stuck on a memory. Then he shakes himself and refocuses. 

“Anyway, at some point during my doomed attempt to salvage things, I swore I’d never have another drink ever again. Which, the being drunk of it all wasn’t really the problem, so saying that didn’t buy me anything, but… even after it ended, I didn’t. I’d been so fucked up that night, and it wasn’t the booze so much as the fear of it being over that made me a one man self-fulfilling prophecy—but I hurt someone I loved more than anything, and I never wanted let myself get that fucking stupid again, so. I haven’t. And honestly, I sleep better knowing that.”

“Wow.” The interviewer is staring at him, stunned. Probably doesn’t get a lot of this sort of thing, not just because of all the wild rockstars and other celebrities that come on the show with stories about trashed hotel rooms and wild parties, but because Eddie is being honest. 

It’s not something he talks about… ever, really. Not even with the guys. But, after five years, it doesn’t hurt the same. It’s not even for St—

It’s not for his ex anymore, if it ever was. 

“Why would it be weird?” Gareth is saying. “We have a built in DD, that’s always great. And Eddie doesn’t give us shit for anything, he’s just honest when we ask if anything was too out of hand. It’s a good reality check.”

“And like,” Doug adds, “he’ll still come out with us to clubs and shit to hang out. But if he says he doesn’t want to drive us to a bar it’s not some passive aggressive or superiority thing because we drink and he doesn’t; he’d really just rather fuck off and do something else.”

“Gee, thanks,” Eddie says dryly, but he’s smirking. 

Doug flashes him finger guns, the fucking dork. “You’re welcome, asshole.”

And the interview moves on. These guys have been Eddie’s friends even longer than they’ve been his bandmates, and the four of them are solid. If the gossip vultures out there want something to pick at, they’ll have to find a different target. 

part 2

Permanent tag list (ask to be added/removed):

@hotluncheddie @hiei-harringtonmunson @sofadofax @hickeysgodcomplex @oatmilk-vampire

@wheneverfeasible @hamiltonswiftie @grtwdsmwhr @yesdangerpls @theseaofdespair

And then someone shows Steve the interview and he asks Robin for Eddie’s number, and they talk for the first time in years and end up falling back in love, but that’s the hard to write part so this is what you get. Xoxo

[sk-touchthesun]

Dead Boy Detectives character appreciation week, day 1: Edwin Payne

💀🔎The more I watch the show the more similarities I find between Edwin and myself. In the flashback scene we see a shy schoolboy trying to make himself small, avoiding people. He's lonely. Then he ends up in Hell, and he needs to fight his own way out of there, without anyone's help. As someone who was an awfully shy kid and has gotten a bit too used to doing things alone, that really resonates with me.

I adore Edwin's self-confidence; he's so unapologetically himself. However, he can appear cold and blunt at times. In his own words, he isn't good with people. It isn't that he doesn't care; he has a kind heart and he cares tremendously. He just doesn't know what to outwardly do with things like emotions, which is very like me. It's beautiful to see how Edwin grows in this aspect, along with other things like the discovery of his sexuality.

The growth Edwin goes through is touchingly portrayed by the brilliant George Rexstrew who makes Edwin's feelings and inner struggles tangible to the viewer. George's talent can especially be seen in the scenes where Edwin shows vulnerability, such as when he confesses his feelings to Charles—which, by the way, I find to be the bravest thing Edwin does in the series.

–

🎨Listen folks, I reworked this one so many times that I don't care anymore. Started making it, had a breakdown, bon appétit. I don't think I'll manage to draw a character per day for this character appreciation week, but let's see how far I'll get! Charles is halfway done, but I completely messed up the layers...

[abbysimsfun]

Sims In Bloom: Generation 2 Pt. 124 (Ash Meets the Old Man)

"Of course I can see you! Why shouldn't I? You don't look like a ghost like Felix Psyded."

"I don't know who that is."

"He only used to be a ghost, but now he's a lawyer and a friend of my mom and Conrad."

Ben perked up, standing as his dog came bounding up the path. "You know Conrad Gordon?"

Ash followed the old man, kneeling to greet the friendly Chesapeake Bay retriever. "Yeah, he's my stepdad. Do you know Conrad?"

The old man nodded happily. "We met not too long ago," he said. "Your stepdad's a good man."

"I'm not supposed to talk to strangers, but it's a good thing you know Conrad, because now you're not a stranger anymore! So if you're lonely on Love Day, I can hang out with you. My name's Ash and I'm eight and a half."

"Is that what today is? No wonder I've seen so many lovers circling the lighthouse." He grinned, staring wistfully out to sea. "It's a pleasure to meet you, Ash. I'm Ben, and this is my dog."

"You don't know today's Love Day?"

He shook his head. "I haven't celebrated Love Day in a long, long time. Not since I was a teenager."

"I can help you celebrate! I even made tissue paper flowers, if you want them." Ash's excitement faded when he opened his backpack. "Oh no! My math textbook crushed the flowers."

Ben offered a warm smile and the dog rushed to his side. "Oh, that's okay. I'm not sure I have a place to put flowers, anyway."

Ash liked the old man. He was nice and felt like a friend already. "What's your dog's name?"

"His name's Captain Whitaker. He's the only friend I need on Love Day, really."

Ash smiled. "That's nice! We have three pets at home. There's Mayor Whiskers and Queen Cupcake - those are the cats. And Gord is our dog. He's the best dog ever."

The retriever barked and Ben smiled. "Captain Whitaker says he's pretty amazing, too."

"It seems like he is!" Ash gave Captain Whitaker another squeeze, slipping him a Buttercup treat that he kept in his backpack for his own pets.

"The Captain's not competitive. He loves other dogs, kids...anyone, really," the old man mused. "He'd love if you and Conrad brought Gord out to play one afternoon. Especially now that the weather will be warm soon."

Ash heard the foghorn behind them and remembered the time. "That's a great idea! But I should get the next ferry home before my mom starts to worry where I am."

The old man nodded as Ash gathered his things to head to the docks, still a little sad about the crushed flowers. "See you again, lad."

"Bye, Mr. Ben. Have a nice Love Day with Captain Whitaker!"

The old man and his dog waved him off and he returned to the mainland, running inside to find his mother. "There you are. I thought you'd be home from school already."

"I stayed to talk to an old man named Ben because I thought he was lonely, but he was just spending the day with his dog."

"You saw Ben?"

"Do you know Ben, too? He said he knew Conrad so I knew he wasn't a stranger."

She was at a loss for words, unsure how much to tell him about the old man without talking to Conrad first. Conrad and Ash could both see Ben and his dog, though Ash didn't seem to think they were spectres at all. But Conrad could be weird about ghosts, and Heather didn't want to say the wrong thing.

"Did you shake the man's hand?" she wondered.

Ash shook his head. "No, but I played with his dog. Captain Whitaker was really nice. I bet he'd get along great with Gord and the cats!"

"I bet he would, but it's time to get cleaned up for dinner. I'm making spaghetti with Dulce sauce tonight."

Ash ran upstairs, excited for pasta with his favourite tomato sauce, while Heather grew even more anxious for Conrad to get home from Sulani. ->

<- Previous Chapter | Gen 2 Start | Gen 2.1 Summary

Gen 1 Start | Gen 1 Summary

NOTE: EA wants to reanimate the dog before I can do it myself with ambrosia treats? Fine. That's still the plan, but we're working with this a little since I already made it canon that ghosts can look corporeal, thanks to Ben! But the notion that Ash can see and interact with them when no one but Conrad has previously done so only came about after the random Love Day pop-up, when Ben was the first old man in a park on Deadgrass Isle (where my headcanon puts the school) who came to mind.

WHY can Ash see Ben? It might be obvious once it's revealed, but I love all your theories so far!

WCIF: The functional backpack build/buy item by Cassity Simmer was placed with TOOL for this and the previous installment, and I felt it was necessary because of the pop-up. It acts like a storage trunk and sits anywhere in world or on desks/tables, with lots of swatches!

[max1461]

I guess the thing is I'm used to being really really mentally ordered; to knowing what I think and feel about everything and a full history of all the ways I ever thought/felt about those things and why and so on, having immediate access to all that stuff. I'm used to my mind being like a library, I'm used to being fully transparent to myself. And I've often heard people say things like "I didn't realize I still felt X", and I've always been baffled by them. How can you feel something and not realize it? How can you be surprised by your own thoughts? That felt impossible to me.

Since this brain thing has happened, I feel like my uh, my table of contents has been destroyed or something, and now I kind of get it. I've had days where I'm panicking because it feels like I don't care about XYZ anymore, then something comes along that reminds me why I care about XYZ and it's obvious that I do actually still care just as much, I just couldn't access it at-will like I'm used to.

Now, to me, this state of affairs feels like, unlivable, like I literally can't function. How can you do anything if you don't have transparent access to your thoughts and feelings? If I was stuck like this forever, which I hope I will not be, I would have to relearn like everything I've learned in my whole life. I mean I've always had transparent access, everything I've ever done has that as a tacit assumption. But I gather that some people are just like this, I mean they're just born like this, they often have to "discover" their own thoughts and feelings through observing how they respond to stuff. This is kind of insane to me and I don't understand how it's possible to live like that but I guess they do ok.

[billysgirllol]

"you'll do that for me?" really, she should stop askin' him that. clearly, he'll do all the good deeds for her. but surprise once again comes and takes over all over again. she just can't believe it. "just be as careful as you can, i'm sure you will be though." a gentle smile spills over her visage, if he's been this gentle with her tangled up curls without making her wince once. the warm water he spills over her back chases out the shivers that were creeping up, how much more tentative could he possibly be? "well we didn't, til you pointed it out." a little laugh bubbles up. "'course. it's the truth." about him and horses being very intelligent, she wonders why no one's told him that before. it's an admirable trait. "why not? you're allowed to." saying sweetly, figuring he just feels like being polite which is kind of him once more.

"i believe that is what i'm sayin'..." didn't really know what she wanted to believe herself. "one time in the woods, we spoke on that. i told 'im everyone's born with a natural goodness. and how.. it's up to us whether to use it or not. he thought that was funny when he scoffed at me and didn't think it was true. i see why now." jaw clenching at the reminder, "i guess he knew deep down he didn't feel any goodness. and i understand... getting angry is a valid reaction. yelling, throwing things, stormin' around... that's a valid reaction. that doesn't make a person evil. but he tried takin' my life, he took three lives. he wanted to make me a fourth. if i didn't upset him that day, it was just a matter of time he strangled me or somethin'. he pretended to care and then has capability to take my own breath. ...does that still mean he was born good?" questioning herself, "i'm not sure." lucy gray really didn't want to believe people were born evil, but what does she think when someone tries murdering her. "i think about that, too. a lot." on what would happen if she turned back around when he kept yelling at her, they could 'talk it out'.

"but like birds... i didn't trust it. i don't know if he'd still point that gun at me. but i have a bad feelin' he would've pulled the trigger even if i had been loyal. i don't think coriolanus is the type to freak out and then expect he'll calm down and still be nice to you." that would've been enough alone for him to put a bullet in her. so it was definitely best she kept running once she already made the move. "oh, it is. it's definitely accurate." the story is insanely accurate, she's witnessed it firsthand. "i appreciate you wantin' to look out for me..." the add in about reva blue cute and making her smile but the worry takes back over. "i just don't want you getting involved, he could hurt you too. i wouldn't be able to live with myself." and what if he'd hurt her over his own brother when it came down to it? nothing can be trusted anymore. "coriolanus may never care a single thought about wonderin' if i'm alive or not. he may be convinced i am, for all i know. so hopefully... it never has to be an issue. but it's the unknown that worries me." knees still folded, arm wrapped around her legs, turning back to face him in the slightest.

“once we’re done here, i’ll wash it and it’ll be as good as new,” he promises, knowing how much sentimental value the dress has. fingertips absently stroking her hair, not even trying to brush it anymore, just trying to make her feel good and help her relax. “i haven’t, by the way. gone through your songbook, i mean.” in case she’s wondering. she gave him permission to do so last night, but it seemed too personal, too invasive. “thank you, lucy gray.” it’s been a while since someone complimented his heart. people often admire what’s on the outside — his blue eyes and dark curls, his nose or cheekbones. she’s one of a very few who seem to care more about what’s underneath. “it means the world to me. i won’t let you down, i swear it.” scooping up a handful of water, he carefully pours it over her back to ensure she stays warm. “so are you, little bird. you’re very smart, too. way smarter than me.” she wouldn’t be here with him if she wasn’t highly intelligent. she wouldn’t have escaped coriolanus. which is still such a strange thought… “oh, yeah?” thankful for the distraction, he lets out another laugh. “never noticed you were also bird-sized and i was horse-sized,” he counters, getting to see her sense of humor for the first time and letting it bewitch him. he adores this side of her, but it has him wondering if this is the girl that she used to be — full of sassy remarks and giggles and sweetness. maybe she’ll be that girl again one day.

“i see…” billy hums, nodding his head even if she can’t really see him. he quickly picks up on what she’s implying, putting two and two together. the stories that she told him last night… “you don’t think my brother was born with a good heart, is that what you’re sayin’?” as children, they were like daylight and dark. polar opposites. but can he call that little boy evil? sure, they’d had their differences, but he wasn’t bad to the bone. he didn’t chase stray cats around the neighborhood or rip the wings off flies. “i’m not sure if i agree. maybe the capitol and our grandmother did that to him.” or maybe he was born with evil already inside him and it just came to light later in life. who knows? “i’m not defendin’ him, just thinkin’ out loud,” he says quickly when lucy gray’s head snaps around, looking at him with something that he can’t quite name or understand. it has him wondering if he’s said something wrong. a small, uncertain smile remains plastered to his visage, his own heart picking up pace. “did i —” say something wrong? but before he can get the words out, she’s speaking up again and he’s falling silent. gesturing for her to carry on.

“you planted a snake to scare him away and slow him down?” dark brows lifting, impressed and wary in equal measure. what if she still thinks he’s coriolanus? will he wake up with a snake under his pillow one morning? and lucy gray nowhere to be found? the idea has his heart missing a beat, chest constricting. but if she wanted to run, she would have done that while he was out by the creek. “i didn’t know ‘bout that. i’m sorry. i didn’t mean to bring back any bad memories with that story.” features softening, understanding her reaction better now. amusement fills his eyes, and he can’t help but think it’s such a badass move, setting a snake trap. “oh, i bet he thought it was venomous. what does he know ‘bout snakes? nothin’. i think that was a smart move. risky but smart. and it served its purpose, right?” it’s scary to think that his own twin brother was trying to hunt her down, shot at her, but then he thinks about their father, the kind of person he was… and it’s not so surprising anymore. “you think he would have hurt you anyway? if you came back to him instead of runnin’ away and plantin’ that snake?” is his brother truly as ruthless and heartless as their father? his heart aches for lucy gray, but for coriolanus, too. it must be awful, living that way, filled with hatred. “mhm, yeah. it’s just a silly story, but the moral is very accurate, i think. if you go through life with hatred festering in your heart, you’ll never be happy. but if you learn how to forgive and focus on healing from the bad experiences, you’ll be alright.” as if reading her thoughts, he adds, “he won’t ever find you, lucy gray. reva blue and i won’t allow it. we will always protect you. i will protect you.” 

[batmanisagatewaydrug]

TW CSA and incest

I'm haunted by something that happened in the past and I'm worried if this affects my sexuality now. It's really mortifying, but I don't know what to do.

When I (21F in present) was about 7, my cousin (27F now) used to babysit me sometimes and we would be alone all day during our school breaks when the parents would still be out. Both of our parents are doctors and there are always medical instruments lying around the house that we used to play with. We were both interested in "playing doctor" and it was amusing for the adults. But on a few occassions, when we were alone, she'd propose we make it special, behind closed doors. She'd make up stories and we'd roleplay, she'd touch me and instruct me to touch her. It was some groping and oral. Later one day I don't remember why but I wasn't allowed to see her anymore and then her parents went abroad taking her with them. I'm mortified half because she was family and half because I know I enjoyed it even if I didn't understand sex. And worst is that just a couple years after that I let a college student also touch me like she did because I thought he was playing like my cousin.

I'm suddenly awash with a lot of feelings, because my cousin is coming back home and I want to dig myself a hole. If she wants to discuss that, what should I do?

hey man. this is a really rough situation and I hope you find a safe resolution, but there's a reason the first thing in my pinned is that I'm not a doctor or a therapist. this is wildly beyond what I can responsibly claim to be able to help with.

[traumacatholic]

I would really appreciate some prayers. I've been having so much money problems recently and I'm just not sure what to do. Every month I end up either in the negative or close to the negative. And it doesn't help that each month I have ended up having to make some big spendings because something essential has broken which needed replaced or whatever else. I can't currently get any help to cover my rent, because I'm still couchsurfing. The landlord of the place that I'm couchsurfing at isn't happy with my finances, and may refuse to add me to the tenancy, which would mean I would have to leave here. I don't even know why the landlord has an issue, because the rent has been getting paid on time without any difficulties. If I were to get added to the tenancy, I could finally ask for extra benefits to help me with the rent which would give me more money for living. But right now rent takes away from most of my benefits. I've been trying to cut spending where I can, but it's so stressful and miserable and overwhelming. I hate that I'm still in the same position I was in, where I'm just couchsurfing and trying to catch a break. I'm not currently in a position where I can save any money at all. And there's still the possibility that I'll be in a worse place housing wise if I'm not allowed to stay here. The fact that this has dragged out for so many months, and I'm still in the position of losing so much has me constantly depressed and suicidal. I just don't know what to do. Everywhere I have reached out to has been unable to assist me

[zodiacdragon334]

Mine's really not that exciting lmao. I just needed a name that was entirely separate from the name I use for the rest of my online presence to post all my fanfic stuff. Because I play a video game competitively (or did, not so much anymore), and I did not want people from that community finding my fanfics because that would be super embarrassing and I didn't want to explain myself.

Zodiac just happened to be the first thing that popped into my head. I tacked on Dragon, because dragons are cool and I like dragons, and threw a number on there. Since I don't want my other name around here, all I'll say is that number is what links my two names.

So yeah, first thing that popped into my head, said "yeah, that works," and called it a day.

And fun fact, I am literally not interested in astrology in the slightest. I don't know where I got Zodiac from. It just happened, and I just roll with it.

I'm not gonna tag anyone because I fear being annoying, but anyone that sees this and wants to do this can go for it.

Tag game🎉

Tag your moots and ask them where they got the idea for their tumblr accounts name!

For my name it was a nickname I was giving back in middleschool! One of our teacher had a system where we worked with 'wifi' eachtime we talked in class we lost a bar of the "wifi" (was a weird joke and we never held count on that) All the kids usually joked if they needed 'wifi' , they would borrow mine if they wanted to talk more. (I was incredibly shy in middle school, I only talked to like 3 people at school;^;)

They called me Ms. Wifi because of that. I just thought it would be funny if I put 'miss' instead of 'ms' because of my terrible actual wifi connection I have at home lol.

That's my story! Now moots, only if you guys want to, tell us your story.

Tags-> @slipping-lately @firequeenofficial @noagskryf @twinklstarrrr @halfbakedspuds @polterwasteist @rokushi-san @mygedagtes +anyone that sees this and wants to do this as well

[0xeyedaisy]

Aw man...

[captain-astors]

Creature. (The rendered ones are referenced from manga panels)