#i just needed to get this out somewhere

[gotjynxd]

𝐌𝐄𝐓𝐀 ;; mental health in regards to vision of self and s*icide

please proceed w caution if these topics are upsetting to you

it's just been rattling around in my brain the difference in jinx's mental health between seasons 1 & 2 and how specific people play a part in what we witness on the screen. even just writing up responses and threads, it's something you sort have to keep in the back of your mind depending upon when the setting of these things are. and i'm not talking about the fractures and voices she hears in her psyche, i'm more specifically talking about how jinx views herself throughout s1 and how we get to that lowest point in s2.

throughout both seasons, the main things that jinx has to deal with is 1) how she sees herself and 2) how that's managed, because i don't think she ever really holds herself in high regard throughout the entirety of the show. there's always this sense of guilt and of knowing that it was HER that caused so many of her loved ones to die and seemingly abandon her. she was the one who didn't listen to what she was told. she was the one who really didn't understand how the gemstones worked but tried anyways, causing catastrophe, and she was the one that inserted herself because she wanted to have just one moment of feeling valuable to the team. jinx just wanted to prove herself and had to watch what happens when she thinks she can actually 'do something'.

i think the only reason we don't see her slip far down into the depression void is because of how quickly silco not only picks her up, but distracts her by playing into her strengths. she is smart. she is handy and talented. give her things to do and something to focus on, laud her successes and she doesn't really have the time to fall. those fractures we notice seem to only really happen when a) something goes wrong/triggers her and b) when she's left alone too long to listen to herself.

season 1 jinx has purpose. silco, for all of his flaws and manipulation of her, gives her purpose. she can put distance between her guilt and shame. and i think it's what overwhelms her in the final episode and leads her to say 'fuck it, i'll burn it all regardless'. its the start of her slippery slope because that moment shows her 'oh look. i did it again. i thought i could become valuable and prove myself to my dad, only to kill him the same as i killed my other one and my friends.' that episode shows her that all the voices and things she heard about her were true. and they've caught back up to her.

season 2, however, is genuinely such a clusterfuck. between the explosion and the council and finding isha, i think it was the start of jinx's s*icidal ideation. you have the line "you feel that? ... because you know in a moment it could all pew. . .' and then 'you ever need to curse a sibling, or a family, or a society, that's my card.' (AND THEN THE LYRICS SAYING 'GOOD LUCK KILLING ME BECAUSE I'M ALREADY DEAD INSIDE) exemplify exactly where jinx's head is at. everyone was right. i'm a jinx. i ruin everyone's lives. i may as well be dead. she's alone. she's lost her purpose, there's no one around to give it to her. it's just her and the voices telling her she's a fuck up. her accepting that in the lines to smeech 'it's always me. whether i'm pulling the pin or not, everyone who gets close to me dies'. hell she still ghosts around the office because she knew offhand the time she'd normally go help silco with his 'medication'. she's just on autopilot with nothing to do.

enter the crew. between isha, sevika and warwick, jinx sees this all as maybe just one more instance where she can, what? how did she say it to sevika? 'it was something i can fix.' it started with her arm because it was digestible. tangible. something she KNEW she could do and is extended out to isha who wanted someone to help her and look up to because that fix and success of sevika's arm gave her a modicum of confidence again. (i'll be going over e3 i think later, because i need to develop my thoughts on that, but the important line she says that, again, exemplifies this first 'lowest' that jinx is in would be 'then stop me. because no matter what i do, i can't seem to die.' it leads me to believe this is more of a 's*icide mission with her hoping maybe she'd bring vi down with her and isha stepping in is what she needs to sort of 'snap out of it'.)

isha, then finding out about warwick, again we are shown that the second jinx finds purpose, or what she believes is purpose, she's able to put all of her effort into it and stave off these feelings that threaten to overwhelm her. because again. . . there's light in her eyes and hope as we walk through those episodes.

then, once again. as seems to be the pattern. she watches as she brings both of the people she loves into a situation where the outcome is their death. again, she's shown how she causes people to die around her. and how many more times should she be shown this before she has to start thinking that maybe. . . just maybe. . . the world would be better off without her in it. and again. she is forced to sit there alone, in a cell, and let these thoughts prevail. where we finally see her accept it all. she's tired. she's over it. nothing she gains after this would make the rest of it worth it. 'i'm done running in circles.' there's nothing left in her that's worth saving, not with all the death and destruction tied to her name.

in knowing that there's nothing vi would stop at to pull her out of the darkness, she has to take her out of the equation. clearly putting herself in the path of danger constantly, hoping that it will do 'the job' for her isn't working. and her monologue while leaving vi in the cell is, in a way, her goodbye letter. it takes ekko reframing her thought process (and i'm sure this took way longer than we're shown in the show, considering there's that cut content) and just, frankly, existing quietly with her, that once again helps drag her out of it. for now.

in summary: i don't think, after the events of s1, act1, that jinx ever really thinks highly of herself. i don't think she ever escapes that guilt and shame. but if you give her purpose, if you let her feel needed, in whatever form it is, that staves off these feelings and keeps them at bay.

[takumisshorttemper]

Earlier i was scrolling through tiktok and i started to get so many initial d videos on my fyp and while i appreciated i kind of wanted to rant about the song choice cuz they kept using the same two fucking songs.

So this is why im making a list of my favourite eurobeat songs, simply cause i can

Right Now - Dark Angel ok this one is not pure eurobeat but i simply love it. it's dark, it's punchy i can never go wrong with this one

Frontal Impact - Daniel no need for explainations here, just vibes

Queen of Mean - The Snake try blasting this 7 in the morning then speak to me again thank you

Heavensent - Ace ok so this is one of my fave artists of the genre, i just like so many of his songs and this one hits different (and this is the same dude who sang this dumb as fuck line "Me and you the bambi girlie, the wild dude shockin' who seem to be livin' on cat food" i've said it all)

Saturday Night Fever - Dave Rodgers ok this one may be a little basic but that fucking intro is worth the whole song

Save Another Day For Me - De Leo i am just so mad this song is not available on my spotify

The End Of The World - Dream Fighters

The Lovebite - Dusty this one had me OBSESSED lately, truly has a double handed chokehold on me

One Night in Arabia - GoGoGirls usually songs with female voices are a bit slower but this one's just chef's kiss

Black U.F.O. - Lupin of this song i like this specific version which is not on spotify either, like what did i do to deserve this

Night & Day - Mr. Groove another kinda basic one but a must either way, it's the fucking intro again im telling you

Disconnected - Hotblade there was a time i had this one song constantly on repeat

Because Of You - Jager

Chemical Love - Kevin&Cherry simply a classic

Super Rider - Mark Astley

Minimal Love - Nathalie

Shattered Dreams - Priscilla

Seraphim - Odyssey Eurobeat last but not least, literally anything from her is fire, she's still so active and is one of my favourites if not the one i enjoy the most consistently

These are all the ones i can think of from the top of my head but i will add more if i find any

[buckys-arm-and-rios-dagger]

I love how in The Boys you can very clearly tell which companies they're riffing on, especially when it comes to the two comic book giants. I know because it's an Amazon show it feels very "SILENCE, BRAND", but because it's shown in the story and production/costume design I choose to believe its the creative team doing it more than Amazon themselves. I mean, writers and actors aren't the only ones that get treated like shit by studios, they're just the most recent to strike. Anyways, my favorite examples from this season (so far, I'm in episode 2) Voughtland and the Dawn of The Seven stuff. I know the characters themselves are meant to be commentary on different DC and Marvel heros (Homelander being a Superman/Captain America, Maeve is very clearly Wonder Woman, etc.), but in terms of things outside of that. Like with Dawn of the Seven, the Vought Studios logo is VERY similar to the Marvel Studios logo, but the font used in the poster feels very reminiscent of the one used for at least the Josstice League version of JL, in addition to all the digs at the Snyder Cut stuff (i wouldn't be surprised if at some point we saw a #Restorethe Snyderverse parody at some point and I am here👏for👏it👏). Vought itself is obviously meant to be a Disney/Amazon parody (I will die on the hill that there's some Amazon mixed in there too even if it's supposed to be overly Disney with the Vought+ reference, Voughtland, etc). Voughtland was also really fun to me. I don't love the "kingdom of Inclusivity" thing because I think the people it's making fun of are going to take it as them "owning the libs" when in reality it seems to be parodying what conservatives seem to think Disney is turning into (at least. That's my read of it.). Crimson Countess's show is I know meant to be a riff on America Sings and other Disney park shows that are full of revisionist history, but I also can't help but wonder if they also were thinking of Rogers the Musical when they wrote that part (idk if Hawkeye was out at the time S3 came out but with the privilege of hindsight that's what my brain went to), especially since Soldier Boy is meant to be a "dark Captain America/Winter Soldier but he's ACTUALLY a villain and not just a brainwashed POW forced to do bad things" type. And like, don't get me wrong I'm fully aware I'm part of the group they're making fun of (I mean. Look at my url), but I always say that in order to love Marvel you gotta really fuckin hate Marvel, and I'm not blind to the issues with it, both the ones they're making fun of and the ones they aren't. Anyways, I don't think I'm saying anything new or groundbreaking or #deep, I just needed to word vomit my thoughts somewhere.

[seafoamgreen]

.

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

PD-MDZS: The Hallmark Episode.

[adrianlyles]

to the ppl who r being so awful to nads about calling a strike to help her people please stay tf away from me. like she is just trying to spread awareness about the genocide that is happening to her people and you are out here calling her ugly, and a zionist and a fake palestinian and for what? none of that is true, i know that she only has love in her heart and you are derailing her mental health for no reason. like she is sixteen for god sakes!

nads (aka nadinewarnerr) over on twitter, a palestinian, has called for a strike from august 11th - august 18th. if you are unable to miss work or school that is ok and if you have any questions about this strike please message nads or jay (aka blythtism) over on twitter/x as i am not the main person who has called the strike just someone hoping to get the word out to more people.

[pangur-and-grim]

it’s hard for me to feed myself right now (just in terms of physical ability), so my mom drove me and the animals to her place. she carried the cats in first, because I had to butt-scoot up the front stairs, and once inside, Pangur got scared and ran. she’s tucked herself away somewhere, and nobody can find her. I probably could, and I could lure her out and make her feel safe again, except that I’m largely immobile. I keep falling on the crutches and fucking my leg up further, and the likeliest hiding spots are up or down a fleet of stairs. it’s been 4 hours, and it’s killing me not to look for her. I’m so tempted to crawl down the basement stairs, broken leg be damned.

[aurosoulart]

alright. that's it. technology has gone too far

[floating-goblin-art]

love the idea that terzo's ghouls died with him, or got tossed back into the Pit... but what if they turned into pillars of salt

[lovesick-x-prince]

Scarian royalty AU where the humans and hybrids have spent eons at war with each other and they're now trying to push for a peace treaty. Grian, an avian, is one of the hybrids sent to the human kingdom to help with the peace treaty since he became very well-known throughout the war, and his presence there will show how seriously the hybrids are taking this. Even Grian, who hates all types of oppression and cooked up more and more chaotic plans of attack during the war, wants this peace treaty to go well, see! While in the human kingdom, Grian meets Scar, one of the princes. Grian is determined to dislike humans, even if he agrees that peace is best for both sides, but he doesn't manage to maintain that position for very long after meeting Scar - who is charismatic, dragging Grian into trouble at every turn, and makes Grian laugh harder than he's laughed in a long time. Naturally, Grian develops a massive crush and decides to court Scar. Only, courting is very different depending on different species... so, Scar doesn't seem to realize what Grian's intentions as he tries out different avian methods - what do you mean "thank you, this is a nice gift?" it's one of Grian's FEATHERS from his WING why don't you UNDERSTAND - so, he realizes he needs to learn about human courting methods... Grian, constantly trying out different "human courting methods," and for some reason, none of them seem to get his point across either! Meanwhile, he keeps developing his feelings for Scar, becoming increasingly desperate to make Scar realize (and return) his feelings before this trip can end. Not sure how the confession finally takes place - something sufficiently dramatic and messy, that has both courts wringing their hands, stressed out of their minds. As Grian is complaining about how neither his avian or human methods worked, really Scar, how oblivious can you be, even if you couldn't recognize avian methods you should have been able to recognize the methods of your own species - "Ah, but, I'm not a human?" What? Yeah, turns out Scar is adopted! He's actually a vex hybrid! The reason the royal family started pushing so hard for this peace treaty all of a sudden is that the newest generation, after taking in and raising a hybrid, is way less biased than the last generations and only wants the best for their adopted prince. Scar's been trying to court Grian with vex methods this entire time, too, fyi. Grian doesn't know if he wants to laugh, or maybe scream for a while. Probably both. But, hey, at least this could be a very politically advantageous marriage, right? What better way is there for the two opposing sides to show their commitment to the cause? I guess they have to get married now. There's just no other choice.

[ruporas]

cheers to the future of humanity (and the future of us)

[ID: Digital illustration in color of Vash and Wolfwood from Trigun. The illustration takes place during the ship/home arc, specifically chapter 21. At the center, Vash is grabbing Wolfwood by the collar and pulls him into a kiss in the middle of a celebration. The pair is colored in vibrant warm hues while their surroundings are colored in cooler colors like green and teals. Luida, Brad, Meryl, and Milly are shown amongst the crowd, occupied in the celebrations as Vash and Wolfwood share a moment by themselves at the center. END ID]

[puppppppppy]

i like him

[bacchuschucklefuck]

this has been a roller coaster of a design journey but finally I can present you: class swap artificer!adaine and rogue!fabian

[godisasimp]

VoidSeeker | Herrscher of Dream

[lover-of-mine]

[specialagentartemis]

unfortunately if I want to independently develop a hypothesis about Rohan's economic/subsistence structure I really need to learn things like the requirements of taking care of horses in the winter and the growing seasons/growing lengths of crops like lettuce, radishes, carrots, and kale, and metalworking time and space commitments, and the types of houses that can be erected and torn down quickly, and the required land area of grazing per horse, and the social organization of Iron Age Eurasian horse cultures, and what other animals might naturally live on the Mark, and productivity and caloric value of mare's milk,

and like. also reread the Lord of the Rings lol